The Effects of Job Loss on the Family
The Blending of Foster and Adopted Children into the Family Dealing with Termin...
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The Effects of Job Loss on the Family
The Blending of Foster and Adopted Children into the Family Dealing with Terminal Illness in the Family Dealing with the Effects of Rape and Incest The Effects of Job Loss on the Family Teen Pregnancy Understanding and Coping with Divorce
Focus on Family Matters
The Effects of Job Loss on the Family
Michele Alpern Marvin Rosen, Ph.D. Consulting Editor
Chelsea House Publishers Philadelphia
CHELSEA HOUSE PUBLISHERS
EDITOR IN CHIEF Sally Cheney DIRECTOR OF PRODUCTION Kim Shinners CREATIVE MANAGER Takeshi Takahashi MANUFACTURING MANAGER Diann Grasse Staff for THE EFFECTS OF JOB LOSS ON THE FAMILY
ASSOCIATE EDITOR Bill Conn PICTURE RESEARCHER Sarah Bloom PRODUCTION ASSISTANT Jaimie Winkler SERIES DESIGNER Takeshi Takahashi LAYOUT 21st Century Publishing and Communications, Inc.
©2002 by Chelsea House Publishers, a subsidiary of Haights Cross Communications. All rights reserved. Printed and bound in the United States of America. http://www.chelseahouse.com First Printing 1 3 5 7 9 8 6 4 2 Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data CIP applied for ISBN 0-7910-6690-8
Contents
Introduction 1 Understanding Job Loss
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2 Financial Effects
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3 Emotional Effects
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4 Coping
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5 Special Problems
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6 Getting a New Job
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Glossary
61
Further Reading
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Index
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Introduction Marvin Rosen, Ph.D. Consulting Editor
ad things sometimes happen to good people. We’ve probably all heard that expression. But what happens when the “good people” are teenagers? Growing up is stressful and difficult to negotiate. Teenagers are struggling to becoming independent, trying to cut ties with their families that they see as restrictive, burdensome, and unfair. Rather than attempting to connect in new ways with their parents, they may withdraw. When bad things do happen, this separation may make the teen feel alone in coping with difficult and stressful issues. Focus on Family Matters provides teens with practical information about how to cope when bad things happen to them. The series deals foremost with feelings—the emotional pain associated with adversity. Grieving, fear, anger, stress, guilt, and sadness are addressed head on. Teens will gain valuable insight and advice about dealing with their feelings, and for seeking help when they cannot help themselves. The authors in this series identify some of the more serious problems teens face. In so doing, they make three assumptions: First, teens who find themselves in difficult situations are not at fault and should not blame themselves. Second, teens can overcome difficult situations, but may need help to do so. Third, teens bond with their families, and the strength of this bond influences their ability to handle difficult situations. These books are also about communication—specifically about the value of communication. None of the problems covered occurs in a vacuum, and none of the situations should
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be faced by anyone alone. Each either involves a close family member or affects the entire family. Since families teach teens how to trust, relate to others, and solve problems, teens need to bond with families to develop normally and become emotionally whole. Success in dealing with adversity depends not only on the strength of the individual teen, but also upon the resources of the family in providing support, advice, and material assistance. Strong attachment to care givers in a supporting, nurturing, safe family structure is essential to successful coping. Some teens learn to cope with adversity—they absorb the pain, they adjust, and they go on. But for others, the trauma they experience seems like an insurmountable challenge—they become angry, stressed, and depressed. They may withdraw from friends, they may stop going to school, and their grades may slip. They may draw negative attention to themselves and express their pain and fear by rebelling. Yet, in each case, healing can occur. The teens who cope well with adversity, who are able to put the past behind them and regain their momentum, are no less sensitive or caring than those who suffer most. Yet there is a difference. Teens who are more resilient to trauma are able to dig deep down into their own resources, to find strength in their families and in their own skills, accomplishments, goals, aspirations, and values. They are able to find reasons for optimism and to feel confidence in their capabilities. This series recognizes the effectiveness of these strategies, and presents problem-solving skills that every teen can use. Focus on Family Matters is positive, optimistic, and supportive. It gives teens hope and reinforces the power of their own efforts to handle adversity. And most importantly, it shows teens that while they cannot undo the bad things that have happen, they have the power to shape their own futures and flourish as healthy, productive adults.
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1 Understanding Job Loss Laura’s father has worked in the computer industry for several years. She has always looked up to him and thought she might follow his career path herself. Then, four months ago, he lost his job and things changed a lot. Her dad doesn’t talk to her that much anymore and rarely laughs or kids around like he used to. Sometimes he and her mother argue about money. The family hardly takes the car out on weekends anymore and they often eat cheap meals for dinner like canned soup and prepackaged macaroni and cheese. Laura is so tired of hearing her parents say the phrase “we can’t afford it.” How did all this happen? Laura wonders if her father will ever get the family out of this situation. The way things are going, she doesn’t know what’s going to happen next.
very year, millions of Americans lose their jobs. When a parent becomes jobless, the entire family is affected, children as well as parents. A parent’s job loss brings changes to the household that can be quite confusing and challenging
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Understanding Job Loss
Millions of Americans lose their jobs every year, which means that unemployment is a fairly common occurrence. Although there may be stress and financial burdens to cope with while an unemployed parent searches for a new job, most people who lose a job will find another one.
to deal with. It reduces the family’s financial income and raises difficult emotions. It is important for young people to understand how job loss occurs and what commonly happens when a parent becomes unemployed. It is also helpful for teenagers to understand the process by which parents get new jobs. Getting information about unemployment and job searches gives you perspective
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The Effects of Job Loss on the Family
on your family’s circumstances and the experiences of other families around you. It also helps you prepare in case you ever find yourself jobless when you become an adult. Unemployment is tough, but there are ways to cope well with it and overcome it. Resources are available to cushion the financial blows and relieve emotional strains. Further, in time, most people who lose a job do get a new position. This book discusses the challenges that unemployment brings to families, as well as ways to handle them. It is also very important to get information and support from your parents, in order to understand and cope with your own family’s circumstances. Job loss happens to educated people with high incomes and to less educated people in lower paying occupations. It happens to people of all races and all ages, to those who have worked at a job for many years and to those who have only just begun working. Unfortunately, the struggles faced by unemployed people and their families are widespread. But knowing that so many different people endure job loss can help a family experiencing it to feel less alone and frightened. It can also show them that they have nothing to be embarrassed about. Most job losses do not reflect a failure on the part of the individual worker, but rather are part of a larger picture of business activity and society. Many teens are relatively unaware of how job loss occurs, even if it happens in their own family. If your mother, for example, worked at a company for the past ten years, received Do you know regular raises, maybe even got the common causes of a promotion last year, and job loss? then suddenly lost her job, you would probably be very confused. Did she do something wrong? How could she be let go when she has done such a good job? Did she quit? Did her boss get angry with her? Does this mean she will find it impossible to find another job? To clear up your uncertainties,
Understanding Job Loss it would be best to ask your mother what happened. There are many possible explanations, and it would be difficult to know for sure what happened in her case unless she told you. This chapter will explain the most common causes of job loss. It will give you a sense of the large picture in which unemployment occurs. This will help you to see that job loss is usually not related to anything personal about workers, thereby helping you to sympathize with unemployed parents and retain confidence in their skills in the workplace. Learning about the causes of job loss will also help you to understand an unemployed person’s prospects about getting a new job. Job loss is difficult, but it is less frightening when you have accurate information about it.
Layoffs One widespread cause of unemployment is layoffs. Sometimes a layoff is also called a RIF (Reduction in Force). A layoff, or RIF, means that an employer lets a person go in order to reduce the business’s expenses. Being laid off has What is a layoff nothing to do with how well and why does it happen? the worker performs his or her job. It means only that the employer decides it does not have enough money to pay the worker’s salary. For example, when a business loses many of its customers, the business owner or executive may need to cut costs in order to keep the operation running. Thus, some workers are laid off, even workers who are valuable employees and who are not responsible for the company’s financial predicament. Layoffs have grown increasingly common since the mid1970s. According to a recent poll conducted by the New York Times, nearly 75% of all households in the United States have had personal experience of a layoff at some time since 1980—witnessing it either in their own families or in those
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The Effects of Job Loss on the Family
When the national economy slows down during a recession, the unemployment rate rises. Because there are more people unemployed and fewer jobs available, it can be difficult to find new employment when you are out of work during a recession.
of friends or neighbors. The poll also showed that about one–third of American households have seen a layoff occur specifically in their own families since 1980. If your parent has been laid off, you are not alone. Layoffs occur under various circumstances. One is a recession, a period of time in which the national economy as a whole slows down. In a recession, people buy fewer items and businesses produce fewer items; businesses do not make as much money to pay workers’ salaries as they did when the economy was strong, so they conduct layoffs. Recessions have occurred periodically throughout American history and have always been temporary. However, while the recession is on, it is very difficult to find a new job, since so many employers throughout the country are cutting back, while so many workers are laid off and looking for jobs. Changes in technology can also lead to layoffs. The advent of computers has led to great shifts in the occupational
Understanding Job Loss picture, shifts that are still ongoing and hard to predict. In some cases, people lose their jobs because computers, having an advantage of speed and efficiency, are installed to perform the work instead. Computerized machines are used in factories, for example, assembling products at lower cost to factory owners than if people were paid to do the work. People who are laid off from a business in this circumstance usually find that most other firms are also now using computers to do the work they used to perform. Thus, these people will likely need to learn to do a different kind of job in order to gain employment again. The growth of computers also leads to new industries, like Internet business, cellular phone service, the manufacture of computer parts, and computer programming. Technological trades have produced many new jobs, but unfortunately, the industries are so new that it is not always clear how they can run successfully. Thus, many companies in the computer industry have suffered financial losses and conducted layoffs. People who are laid off from a technological job may find a more successful company in their industry to work for, or a different industry in which to use their skills. Another circumstance frequently associated with layoffs is mergers. In a merger, two companies join to become one large company. The firm then pools its resources from both companies and may lay off people it no longer needs. For example, if a business has twenty salespeople and merges with another firm that has thirty salespeople, the employer may decide that fifty salespeople is now too many for the one company. Perhaps only forty are needed and ten will be laid off. Layoffs result from numerous practices that employers sometimes undertake to save costs and gain profits in a challenging economic environment. Sometimes a firm moves its business, or part of its business, to a poorer region or nation. The company may then lay off workers and replace them with people who will work for relatively low wages. In other cases,
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The Effects of Job Loss on the Family businesses replace some of their staff members with temporary or part-time workers, who work for less money. Whatever the circumstances involved in a layoff, it is important to remember that people who are laid off usually find new jobs. Potential new employers understand that layoffs are due to common business activities and are not due to any fault of the workers.
Disability Another cause of job loss is disability, which is illness or injury that prevents an employee from working. People suffering from a serious, long-term illness, like cancer, or injury, such as a broken arm, may be unable to work for an extended period of time. Employers usually have policies allowing disabled workers to stay out of work for a limited time and return when they recover. However, should illness or injury last a very long time, a worker may have no choice but to quit his or her job. When disabled workers recover, they might be rehired at their last place of business. Those who have been permanently replaced will need to find new jobs. Some people with disabilities may not get healthy enough to perform the jobs they used to do. And some may not get well enough to work at all for an indefinite period of time.
Resignation Resignation means leaving a job voluntarily—that is, choosing to quit. There are several common reasons people choose to leave a job without having a new one. Some people need to take time to care for a sick family member or aging Why would a parent relative. Others may be so choose to leave their job dissatisfied with the conditions voluntarily? at their job that they feel it is best to resign. Sometimes people decide to leave work in order to attend school fulltime, believing that further education will lead to a more
Understanding Job Loss
A disability, such as an injury or a illness, is another common cause of unemployment. Although there are laws that protect an employee’s job for a short time if they are sick or injured, a longterm illness or injury may result in job loss.
fulfilling career in the future. Finally, in some cases a parent of a newborn child may leave work in order to care for the baby. Large workplaces are required by law to permit parents to take some time off from work to care for their children without losing their jobs, and most smaller workplaces follow this policy too. However, some parents elect to quit their jobs in order to spend more time with their young children. They
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The Effects of Job Loss on the Family might stay out of work for a long period of time or switch from a full-time job to a part-time job. Whatever the reason for resignation, most people who voluntarily leave a job will find a new job when they are ready. They will probably need to explain to the new employer what happened.
Being Fired for Cause Being fired for cause means that a worker is told to leave a job because his or her performance is not satisfactory to the employer. To a worker, being fired is probably the most emotionally painful way job loss can occur. It is also more difficult to get a new job when you have been fired for cause than when you have been laid off or resigned. That is because potential new employers often suspect that they too will find themselves displeased with the worker’s job performance. It is important to remember that although it is hard, it is not impossible for fired workers to obtain new jobs. Workers who did not perform their job well may find ways to show new employers that they can do the new job better. For example, people who had alcohol or drug problems that interfered with their work may get professional help to overcome their problems. It is also useful to realize that in some cases people who have been fired for cause have been treated unfairly. In other words, the job loss may not be the worker’s fault. The employer How would you feel may have had unrealistic if your mom or dad was expectations of the employee. fired from a job? Or perhaps the worker had no way of knowing that he or she was unsuited for the job. Further, some employers treat workers badly because they mistrust their race, religion, or sex. That is called discrimination, and it is illegal and wrong. Job discrimination should be reported to the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission of the U.S. government.
Understanding Job Loss
Finding Out How a Parent’s Job Loss Occurred Understandably, learning about parental job loss often makes teenagers angry. They are likely to feel angry at the affected parent, even though, as discussed, job loss is usually not due to a worker’s failure or inadequacy. Anger may also be felt toward the employer. Employers are also usually not at fault for letting workers go; they are simply attempting to run business profitably in accordance with the demands of the economic environment. It can feel frustrating and frightening to learn that some aspects of employment are not in any one person’s control. It helps to remember that these emotions are totally normal. It is also important to bear in mind that most unemployed people do in time find new jobs. Research and reading can help teenagers understand the common circumstances that bring about joblessness. When a parent loses a job, it is also very important that the parent give the child basic information about how and why it happened in his or her particular case. If parents do not volunteer this information, their children should ask them. It is frightening for young people, or anyone, to experience a changed circumstance that they don’t have an explanation for. Further, without knowing the facts, the mind imagines explanations for the job loss, and these may well be inaccurate. For example, you may imagine that your father was fired when in reality he was laid off. Asking about the cause of a parent’s job loss can also enable teenagers to anticipate if or when the parent will find new employment. If you learn that your mother has left work because of injury, for example, you can also discuss with her how long it will take until she is healed enough to start working again. You and your family will still have to cope with the job loss, but you will find it easier if you know what is happening.
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2 Financial Effects Mark’s mother worked in a warehouse, but when her company merged with its competitor, she was laid off. There weren’t enough positions for all of the warehouse employees, and Mark’s mother was one of the newer staff members. Mark’s dad has a good job, but there are so many bills: car payments, mortgage payments, utilities . . . not to mention food and clothing. So one night his parents called a family meeting to explain the situation to Mark and his brothers. Until his mom found a new job, the boys would have to cut back on expenses. Things like weekly allowances, cable TV, and eating dinner out on Friday nights would have to go. And they weren’t allowed to borrow the car anymore, because car insurance and gas money were just too expensive. Mark couldn’t believe how much his life was about to change.
he most direct effect of a parent’s job loss is that he or she is no longer earning a salary for the family. A parent’s reduction in income may upset the entire family, adults and children alike.
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Financial Effects
When a parent becomes unemployed, they are no longer earning an income. If the family does not have savings to help them during the period between jobs, they may feel the financial strain of mounting bills and past due payments.
Kids, as well as parents, may need to make changes in their lifestyle as a result of having less money to spend. The extent of the changes in lifestyle varies from family to family and depends on several factors. For example, parents may have financial resources—such as savings, assistance from their old workplace, and government benefits—that help cover their loss of income until they find a new job. Further, if the parent finds a new job quickly, he or she will not be as affected by the loss of salary as a parent who is out of work for a long time. The financial effects of job loss are challenging, but most families find ways to cope. Parents usually find ways to meet the basic needs of their children, and children usually find ways to adjust to changes in the family’s finances. Teens facing a parent’s job loss will find it helpful to understand what resources are available to the family and what changes in lifestyle to expect.
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Financial resources Most large employers provide assistance to workers whom they lay off. Some businesses have an agreement with workers to give them severance pay—this is a sum of money paid to an employee who is laid off. In addition, at companies that provide paid vacation time, workers who lose their jobs should receive pay for any vacation time they haven’t used. Further, many companies offer laid-off employees valuable help with finding new jobs and filing for government aid. Government aid includes unemployment insurance. This is a state-run program that provides money to people who lose their jobs through no fault of their own. Unemployment insurance is nearly always available to people who are laid off, or RIFed. The program usually does not cover people who resign from their jobs, and it If someone is laid off is available only in a limited can they collect unemploymanner to people who are ment insurance? What if fired for cause. However, they resign or are fired? everyone who loses a job should check with the local unemployment insurance office to see if he or she is eligible. The program offers a weekly check for a specified number of weeks, usually about 24. The money issued is much less than what the worker earned at his or job, but it does help. Additional aid is available to people who lose their jobs because they are disabled. The Social Security Administration provides monthly checks to people who have a physical ailment that prevents them from working. Also, each state’s Department of Labor distributes Workers’ Compensation, payments to people who suffered an injury at their place of employment. Some business firms too provide disability insurance, temporary payments to workers
Financial Effects who are too ill to perform their jobs. Like unemployment insurance, disability benefits usually pay far less money than most jobs, but the money is nonetheless helpful. Many families have other financial resources to help cushion the blow of job loss. For example, parents can draw from whatever money they saved or invested while they were working, in order to help cover expenses until they find a new job. People who had well-paying jobs may have a substantial amount of savings, while people with low-paying jobs may have been unable to set much money aside. Parents need to be careful that they don’t spend all their savings before they find a new job; if it takes a long time to get a new job, the savings may run out. Besides drawing from savings accounts, parents may also be able to borrow money from a bank or stockbroker and pay it back when they are employed again. In addition, relatives and friends may offer loans or gifts. Finally, in a two-parent household in which one parent is unemployed, the other parent may find a way to earn more money. For example, if a father loses his job and the mother has not been working, she may get a job to help support the family. If she has been working part-time, she may increase her hours to get a larger paycheck.
Resources for poor families Many families who experience job loss manage to cope very well with the reduction in their income. However, some families face difficult struggles. A mother raising children alone, for example, has no husband’s income to rely on if she becomes unemployed. Some people who experience job loss earned low pay when they were employed and have little savings or help from relatives. For these families, unemployment insurance does not help enough to make ends meet. Additional government aid, however, is available to families who experience major financial hardship. For example, the
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Government programs like TANF and food stamps are valuable resources for families experiencing financial difficulties during times of unemployment. Although these programs are never as lucrative as having a job, they can help families survive.
state-run welfare program, Temporary Assistance for Needy Families (TANF), provides some money to households with low income and low savings. Also, each state has a food stamp program available for poor families. This program gives families coupons that they may use at supermarkets to get nutritious foods for free. If your family runs into serious financial trouble, be sure that your parents check with a social worker or government office to find out what state assistance is available.
Budgets Many teenagers know little about how their parents manage finances. If a parent loses his or her job, some teenagers imagine that their household’s financial prospects are worse than they really are. On the other hand, some teens are unaware of the challenges that the family does face. Understanding how money is managed gives you
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a more realistic picture of the family’s situation. When a family faces job loss, parents must make a budget, that is, a plan of how to spend money most wisely. First, parents must figure out how much money they have—this calculation includes severance pay, government benefits, savings, loans, and the income of the parent who does have a job, if applicable. Second, parents determine how much money they must spend on necessities—necessary expenses generally include mortgage or rent, taxes, food staples, automobile maintenance, telephone service, electricity, and gas or oil for heat and hot water. Finally, parents compare the money they have with the money they must spend. If What is a budget they don’t have enough to pay and what can you do to help your for the essentials, they must parents reduce family expenses? find some way to increase their income or lower their spending. If they do have enough, they can determine how much money, if any, they have left over to spend on items beyond the bare necessities. If your family experiences job loss, you will find it helpful to ask your parents how much spending they need to cut. Some families must sell their car, move to a cheaper apartment, or even bunk with a relative if they cannot afford rent. On the other hand, some families need only to cut down on buying extra clothes or eating at restaurants. The only way you can know for sure about your own family’s budget is to find out from your parents. Whatever changes in spending your family must make, it is easier to cope if you understand what is happening.
Coping Cuts in family spending often make teens feel anxious or angry. Teens may worry: “Can I still go out to the movies or concerts with friends? I need new clothes to feel
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comfortable at school. What if I get sick and can’t afford to go to the doctor? I don’t want to have to think about money every time I need something.” The best way to cope with your worries is to talk with your parents about them. First, when you talk to your parents, you will likely discover that your worst imaginings are not true. You will almost certainly find out, for example, that you will not starve. No matter how much your parents may be struggling with money, it is their responsibility to support you, and they will usually find ways to take care What would you do of your most important needs. if you were worried that For example, parents can your mom or dad’s job loss nearly always manage to meant that your family provide you with medical would be homeless? care. Those who had medical insurance at their old workplace can usually continue their coverage by making relatively small payments each month. Even if your parent lacks health insurance, your other parent may have insurance that covers you, or your parents can pay low fees at a public health clinic. Parents with low income may also be eligible for Medicaid, a state-run health insurance program. If you are concerned about a fundamental need like health care, your parents can reassure you by explaining how they will provide for that need. Although most parents manage to provide for their children’s most important needs, they do usually need to cut back on less essential expenses when they have less money. Less essential items may include expensive foods, extra clothes, movies, books, music CDs, and family vacations. It is helpful to find out how much spending your parents must cut. Getting this information helps you adjust your expectations in keeping with the family’s budget. Further, when you learn what your parents can afford,
Financial Effects
A great way to alleviate some of your anxieties when one of your parents is unemployed is to talk to them about your concerns. They may be able to explain the family budget to you, and show you that your worst fears will probably not come true.
you can better understand that your parents’ reductions in spending are a result of their financial circumstances and not a reflection of how much they care about you. Most parents take their children’s needs and feelings into account when determining budgets and do everything they can to minimize the effects of job loss on their children.
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The Effects of Job Loss on the Family Finally, when talking with your parents, you can participate in making budget decisions and negotiate with them to get what you most want. It helps to let them know what your priorities are. For example, you can offer to give up purchasing the trendy sneakers you’ve had your eye on, in exchange for getting the music lessons you want more. Or you can lower your household’s electric and gas bills by turning off the lights, TV, and computer when you don’t really need them on, and by waiting until your clothes and towels are dirty before you put them in the laundry; you can ask your parents to set aside the money you save on utility bills for something more important to you. Your family’s budget may be challenging, but you will cope much more easily if you and your parents communicate and understand each other’s concerns.
Part-time jobs Many teenagers also find it useful to get part-time jobs. A job can help you contribute to the family’s income and earn money for items you want, but you must consider the decision to get a job carefully. First, don’t put pressure on yourself to support your family. The responsibility to support the family belongs to your parents, not you. You can help increase your family’s financial resources, but only to a limited extent—a teen simply does not earn an adult’s salary. Second, be aware that a job takes time and energy. Be certain that working will not interfere with your schoolwork. Your education is important in the long term to give you options for a satisfying, well-paying career. For those teens who can handle a part-time job without neglecting their schoolwork, working can be very valuable. Besides providing money, a job gives you experience that helps you find a fulfilling career later in life. It can help you determine what kinds of work you like and don’t like. Getting paychecks also helps you learn how to budget your
Financial Effects
Getting a part-time job when a parent is unemployed may mean that you can continue to enjoy some of the things that you like to do, like going out with friends. A part-time job will also give you valuable experience for the future.
own money—you will have to determine how to spend your income most wisely. To find a job you are interested in, read newspaper classified ads and ask your parents, friends, neighbors, or school counselors for suggestions and guidance. On the other hand, if you do not feel able to handle the responsibility of working yet, don’t worry. Whatever you choose to do about part-time employment, turn to your parents to get support for your decision. If you explain how you feel to your parents, you will likely reach an understanding that you will all be comfortable with.
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3 Emotional Effects Lisa’s father never missed one of her softball games, that is, until he lost his job. He seemed to change so much in the three weeks since his company downsized. He didn’t make jokes anymore, and he seemed not to be as interested in her life as he used to be. Lisa’s mom and dad seemed to argue much more than they used to, over little things like burnt toast and taking the trash out. She couldn’t understand why they would worry about these little things when there were so many bigger problems to deal with. So, Lisa tried to stay out of their way, and spent a lot of time alone in her bedroom. She didn’t want to hear their arguments anymore.
parent’s job loss affects the emotional state of everyone in the family. While the most obvious result of job loss is a reduction in income, the emotional effects of unemployment are just
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Emotional Effects as great, and sometimes greater, than the financial effects. Besides triggering financial worries, job loss also commonly challenges your self-esteem, your confidence, and your sense of the stability of the world around you. Families who experience job loss may sometimes feel like a dark cloud is hanging over them, a cloud that can make everyone feel tense, grumpy, fearful, and sad. It is important to identify the emotional effects of job loss, so that you can put them into perspective. When you understand emotions and where they come from, they are easier to deal with. It is helpful to recognize that they are normal, temporary results of the circumstances of parental unemployment.
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The effects of unemployment extend beyond financial hardships: it may make both the unemployed person and the family feel less confident, anxious, and sad. By identifying these feelings, it is possible to keep them in perspective and deal with them in a constructive way.
The parent’s emotions When people lose their jobs, their first reaction is usually shock. Such a big change in one’s daily life is hard to grasp and take in. Feelings of disappointment and sadness are also common and understandable. Even grown men may cry. If you see your parent cry, remember that tears are not a sign of weakness, but rather a natural response to loss. Anger is also a typical reaction to loss. Teenagers are often frightened to see
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their parents get mad. Remember that their anger is a normal, temporary response to losing something they valued; it has nothing to do with how they feel about their children. Another common emotional response to unemployment is anxiety. People who lose their jobs often worry about money and about finding a new job, even if their prospects for the future are actually good. In fact, often even people who voluntarily leave their jobs feel anxious. Anxiety is a normal reaction to changed circumstances. The deepest psychological effect of job loss is injury to self-esteem. People who are unemployed commonly struggle with doubts about their self-worth. First, many people who lose a job blame themselves, even though job loss is rarely How would you feel the worker’s fault. Often if you lost your job, even if people find it hard to accept it wasn’t your fault? that some events are not in their control; they worry that they are to blame for the event, even if they know this not true. For example, when a man loses a job due to an extended illness, he may worry, maybe I could have done something to prevent getting sick, or maybe I could have kept going to work even though I got sick. In fact, his illness was out of his control and required him to stay home, but he may still feel sneaking doubts about whether he has done something wrong. Second, work plays a big role in giving people a sense of accomplishment, purpose, and value. Many people feel that their job helps define who they are. If you ask an adult who she is, she often responds by telling you what job she has—“I’m a teacher,” or “I work in the health care industry.” People who become unemployed lose more than just a job; they lose part of their identity. They lose something that helped give a sense of meaning and structure to their lives, something that helped contribute to society. In addition, for many people in our
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culture, financial income plays a part in self-worth. We are surrounded by advertisements that send the message that our value is based on what luxuries we can afford—that we must buy fancy cars, furniture, and clothing to be likeable people. In reality, of course, people who are unemployed are the same good people they were before their job loss; only their employment circumstances have changed, not their value and abilities. But When a parent is worried about being losing a job presents challenges unemployed, it can affect every part of to self-esteem. his or her life. They may be anxious or
The parent’s behavior
angry, or have less time and energy to spend with their family members.
When people feel upset, worried, or angry, they often act in ways that reflect those emotions. People who experience job loss may appear on edge, disturbed by small problems that they could take in stride if they weren’t so distressed about unemployment. At times, they may just mope around the house, lacking the energy to do anything. They may not feel like joking and kidding around. Some sleep too much, and some have trouble sleeping much at all. People who are worried about unemployment also often become irritable, getting angry with family members more easily than they used to. Parents may argue with each other about money. Sometimes they may get mad for no good reason at all. Further, sometimes people who lose a job become less available to others. They may not feel like visiting with friends or relatives. They may not talk as much with their
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children as they used to, and they may be distracted when their children talk to them. Sometimes parents talk less with their children in order to protect them; they want to hide how upset they are from their children, so their children won’t worry. In other cases, parents may be so involved with their own concerns that they simply have less energy to talk. On the other hand, some parents respond to being upset by talking so much about their worries that they don’t seem able to listen to anyone else. If you feel that your parents are closed off from you or telling you more about their troubles than you can handle, it’s helpful to tell them. They will likely try to pay more attention to you if you remind them that you need them. When your unemployed parent shows signs of stress, it is important to recognize that it is the job loss that is causing his or her tension, not you. You can’t make your parent’s stress Are you to blame about employment go away, if your mom or dad is but you can help your parent anxious or angry after and yourself feel better by losing a job, or doesn’t understanding his or her spend time with you? emotional state. Remember that parents’ edginess and sadness are normal reactions to their loss of employment, and that they will feel better again when they find a new position.
Your emotions No matter how much you understand your parents’ stress, you will likely still find it upsetting to see your parents having a hard time. Children have their own emotions about a parent’s job loss, and how they feel is just as important as what the parent is going through. When your parent loses a job, you experience changes, just as your parent does, in the family’s financial situation and daily life. You may have to sacrifice things your parents can no longer afford. Further,
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you may receive less positive attention from your parents when they are worried and distracted by their own concerns. You may also feel upset just to know that your parent is feeling bad. Teens who encounter parental job loss feel unsettled, just as their parents do. Like their parents, teens commonly feel anxiety, disappointment, and anger about the family’s changed circumstances. Even more challenging, teens may blame themselves for their parents’ stress. When you sense that your parents are moody, it can be difficult not to feel that you have Job loss will most likely affect the emotions of all the family members, not somehow caused their bad just the unemployed parent. Children mood. You may feel it’s up to rely on their parents to take care of you to solve their problems. them, so they may feel worried and sad You may feel responsible even when their mom or dad is unemployed. though you know that their problem is joblessness, a problem that has nothing to do with you and that you cannot solve. Teens also feel insecure when they see that their parents are vulnerable. It can be frightening to learn that your parents cannot control some aspects of their lives. You rely on your parents to take care of you, and thus you need to feel confident in their abilities. But it can be difficult to remain confident in your parent when you see him or her struggling. It is important to be aware that your parents are the same capable people
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The Effects of Job Loss on the Family they always were. They may be having a hard time with the rough circumstances of unemployment, but they can resolve those circumstances. They can still take care of you.
Mental health problems Most people who experience job loss struggle with painful emotions, but they are usually not overwhelmed by their feelings. However, some people find that their emotions get out of control. Some develop mental health problems, such as clinical depression or anxiety disorder. The major signs of depression include feelings of sadness and hopelessness, What would you do difficulty concentrating or if your mom or dad always taking an interest in anything, seemed depressed or changes in appetite and sleep, anxious after losing a job? and a sharp drop in school grades. The major signs of anxiety disorder include intense worry, difficulty concentrating, poor sleep, and shortness of breath. It is normal to have any or all of these symptoms for short times when you are under stress; the sign of a mental health problem is that the feelings last for so long and are so troublesome that you cannot function the way you used to. If your emotions feel overwhelming or interfere with your daily life, get help from a professional. Talk to a guidance counselor, psychologist, doctor, or social worker. These practitioners are trained to help you manage your feelings and get relief. If your parents show signs of depression or anxiety disorder, you can suggest that they seek professional treatment, as well as see a counselor yourself to cope with the ways their problems affect you.
Positive emotions Many children of unemployed parents discover positive benefits from their family’s circumstances, in addition to
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One positive aspect of unemployment is the fact that parents may have more time to spend with their children. Most parents realize that their job loss will make their children feel anxious, and are willing to take the time to reassure them that things will get better.
distressing emotions. When parents become jobless, they may have more time to spend with their children. Although parents may be sometimes distracted, they may also enjoy escaping their worries by doing fun activities with their kids. In addition, a tough situation can encourage a family to communicate and understand each other better. When families face rough times together, they often grow closer with each other. Most families who experience job loss learn that they can cope with its hardships. Learning that you can manage difficult emotions can be very empowering. The next chapter discusses methods of coping.
4 Coping Mr. Rooney’s biology class was always Rick’s toughest, and it was especially hard now that he was so distracted over his mom’s job loss. So Rick got up the courage to talk to Mr. Rooney. To Rick’s surprise, Mr. Rooney was really understanding, and even gave him an extension on his term paper. Rick felt so happy on the way home from school that he bought his mom a card to wish her good luck. She had an interview for a new job in the morning, and she was really nervous. He wrote in the card how proud he was of her for trying her best, and that he knew she would find a job soon. When Rick’s mom read his words, it was the first time he saw her smile in weeks.
lthough emotional difficulties are natural during times of stress, there are ways teens can cope with them. It is very helpful for teens to recognize that the family’s stress is caused by unemployment, not them. Realizing that you are not the cause of the problem keeps you from feeling bad
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Coping
There are many things children can do to help their parents during times of unemployment. Doing chores around the house lightens the burden on parents, and is a great way to help reduce some of the stress an unemployed parent feels.
about yourself. Your family may be struggling with unemployment, but at least you can realize that you are still valuable and loved. You deserve to feel as good as you can. And although you cannot fix the problem of your parent’s job loss, you do have the ability to help your parents and yourself to feel better.
Helping parents There are many ways you can help your parents cope with unemployment. Making an effort to help your parents benefits you as well as them. It enables you to actively
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reduce family tensions, to feel good about your generosity, and to gain appreciation from your parents. A big way to lighten your parent’s burden is to help around the house. You can make your parent’s life easier by keeping the volume of your music down and by keeping young siblings out of your parent’s hair. You can also increase your household chores. Offer to wash dishes, cook, wash clothes, vacuum, or do yard work. It is helpful to make a clear list of the tasks you plan to do so you won’t forget. If your parents have to nag you to do your chores, they will be more tense. You can also reduce your parents’ stress by finding fun things to do as a family. You can have fun with your parents without spending a lot of money by going to a park or museum, borrowing a video from the library, seeing a show at a community theater, playing games with them, or even just sharing funny stories together. Be creative and think What can you do of something your whole to alleviate some of stress family will enjoy. your parents may feel when Parents also appreciate they are unemployed? emotional support. Pay them compliments to show that you admire them. Let them know you believe in their abilities. Give them a greeting card or e-card, or create a card for them yourself. Always remember that you can help your parents feel better, but you cannot make their problems go away. No matter how much you lighten their load and cheer them up, they will probably still struggle with their feelings about unemployment. You can cope more easily by realizing that you are not responsible for your parents’ feelings. They are adults, and it’s up to them to solve their employment problems. They don’t expect you to do it. In fact, the greatest help you give your parents is just being yourself.
Coping They love you and that gives them more comfort than anything else.
Helping yourself When you are living with a strain like parental job loss, it is extra important to take care of yourself and to get emotional support from others. Sometimes teenagers are so concerned about their parents’ job loss that they find it hard to take care of themselves. Be aware that you need emotional nourishment now more than ever in order to handle the changes your family is experiencing. Treating yourself well also helps your parents. They enjoy seeing you nurtured. You deserve it. First, take care of your basic needs. Eat regularly, exercise, and get enough sleep in order to support your health. If you neglect your health and get sick, it will be harder to cope with your emotions. Further, exercise, nutritious eating habits, and adequate sleep are proven to relieve feelings of stress. Similarly, try to keep up with your schoolwork. Focusing on your studies can be a good distraction from your worries, and falling behind at school will only add to your problems. If you have trouble concentrating at school, ask your teachers or guidance counselor for help. Let them know that your parent’s unemployment is difficult for you. You also need to nurture your emotional well-being. It is important to keep an eye on how you are feeling. Burying your emotions can lead to depression. It is better to air your thoughts and feelings about your family’s situation, even if only by expressing them to yourself. Try drawing or writing in a diary to get your thoughts and feelings out on paper. When you feel worried or sad, you can help yourself cope by turning to a positive, hopeful mental picture. Remind yourself of the good things in your life and of good things you can look forward to. Remember a tough situation from your past that you overcame; if you could master
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When a parent is unemployed, he or she may be distracted and focused on finding a new job. It is important that children ensure their own well-being during these times by asking for help when they need it, and keeping up with their schoolwork and other daily activities.
that situation, you can master this one too. Some teens find that religious activities also help them feel comforted and hopeful. Another excellent technique that relieves stress is focused breathing. Take five minutes for yourself, close your eyes, and breathe deeply, taking full, complete inhalations and exhalations; focus on the sensations of your breath in your body and let other thoughts drift away. It is also important to have fun. Spend time with friends, play with your pet, listen to music, dance, make art projects, read an enjoyable book, or watch an absorbing video. Keep a sense of humor; laughter is a great healer. Indulge yourself and escape your family tension in a warm bubble bath. Wear your favorite piece of clothing, jewelry,
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or pair of shoes to help yourself feel good all day long. When some teens are under stress, they are tempted to use recreational drugs or alcohol to feel better. It is much better to avoid these substances. Alcohol and drugs may make you feel good for a moment, but their chemicals What would you do make you more depressed if you felt so anxious about your and anxious afterward. Overall mom or dad’s unemployment that they disturb your health and you were tempted to turn to your emotions. When you are drugs or alcohol for relief? already struggling with a tough situation like parental job loss, you don’t need to feel worse from the long-term negative chemical effects of drugs and alcohol.
Getting support from others Teens whose parents are unemployed need to talk to others about their feelings and concerns. Everyone needs a shoulder to lean on during challenging times. Sharing your thoughts and feelings with others keeps you from feeling alone, and enables you to receive encouragement and advice. Talk to your parents, siblings, or other relatives, your friends, a trusted teacher, a religious cleric—whoever who you feel comfortable with. You may also find it useful to seek professional counseling—from a guidance counselor, school psychologist, mental health clinic, or social service agency. Counselors are specially trained to help you cope with your feelings and deal with your parents. When parents are struggling with unemployment, many teens are reluctant to discuss their own troubles with them. You may worry that your parents are so tense that they can’t handle listening to anyone else’s concerns. You may fear that they will get mad or hurt if you tell them you are upset about their unemployment. Or you may think there’s no point in talking to them because there’s nothing they can do anyway.
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It is important to share you feelings with others during stressful times like a parent’s job loss. Turning to friends, relatives, or a trusted adult can be a great way to relieve some of the fear and anxiety that accompanies unemployment.
In contrast, most parents want to hear their children’s thoughts and feelings and learn what is going on in their children’s lives. Although your parents face the challenges of unemployment, that doesn’t mean in any way that you are not still important to them. They are concerned about you and want to give you support. It makes them feel good to take a break from thinking about themselves and turn instead to helping their children. You are actually doing them a favor by letting them know how you are doing. It is true that your parents are busy keeping the family’s finances afloat and finding a new job. They may not be available to you at all times, so try to talk to them when
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they appear to be free. If they are too preoccupied to listen, ask them to choose a time that is more convenient for them. You will almost certainly find them cooperative. It is also helpful to let them know that you understand their feelings of stress, while making sure to express your own feelings. Sharing your feelings with your parents won’t make their unemployment go away, but it will help you cope with it. Communicating helps you feel closer to each other. It gives What would you do you the power of knowing if you were anxious about your your feelings matter to your parent’s unemployment, but parents, and the opportunity to didn’t want to create more stress get their encouragement and by talking about it with them? support. For example, you may like your new part-time job but feel nervous about some aspect of it, such as operating a cash register. When you tell your parents, they may offer valuable advice, give you a morale boost before you go to work, or even prepare a special treat for you when you come home. Just getting reassurance that your parents care about you and stand behind you makes you feel better.
Accepting your feelings No matter how much you use coping methods, you will probably still feel anxious, upset, angry, and confused at times throughout the period of your parent’s unemployment. Remember that these feelings are natural parts of life and that everyone experiences, and survives, them at one time or other. Be aware that you won’t feel bad forever, especially not when your parent finds employment again. You are in the midst of a tough situation—one that you have limited control over— but you do have the power to relieve your stress and keep your spirits up. Surviving this crisis will teach you valuable coping skills you can use for the rest of your life.
5 Special Problems Jane’s dad started drinking every day as soon as he got home from work. By dinner time, he was a different person: gone was the gentle and fun person she used to know, and in his place was a very loud and angry man. It scared Jane, especially late at night when she heard her parents arguing. Sometimes she woke up in the morning to find her mom with a black eye. Jane’s dad was often too hung over in the morning to go to work, and eventually he was fired. She hoped that would scare him into getting sober, but his drinking just got worse. Jane didn’t know what to do. She was scared and sad all the time, and she needed to tell someone what was going on. But who?
ometimes serious troubles like divorce, drug and alcohol abuse, family violence, and homelessness arise in connection with job loss. If your parent loses a job, don’t conclude that these problems will necessarily occur. Unemployment does not usually result in these predicaments. However, in some cases, it does.
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Special Problems
A parent may be fired for cause if their work performance suffers because of alcohol or drug abuse. Sometimes, a parent may try to escape from the painful emotions created by job loss by using alcohol or drugs. However, substance abuse only causes more stress and actually complicates the problem of unemployment.
Further, if a parent had severe problems before he or she experienced job loss, unemployment can make the troubles worse. Resources are available to help you understand tough situations and handle them.
Drug and alcohol abuse The use of drugs or alcohol is considered abuse when it interferes with one’s health and ability to manage daily life.
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The Effects of Job Loss on the Family
Sometimes people who lose a job use drugs or alcohol in an attempt to feel better about their problems. Under the strain of unemployment, they may veer into abusing these substances. Teens can recognize whether their parents are having trouble with drugs or alcohol. Do you worry about their use of these substances? Do you often wish they would stop? Typically, drug or alcohol abuse leads to mood swings and irresponsible behavior. Parents’ substance abuse makes it hard for them to handle daily tasks, and they may neglect their children’s needs. Their instability is very difficult to live with. Children commonly feel responsible for their parents’ abuse of alcohol or drugs. It is important to realize that their drinking or drug abuse is neither your fault nor your responsibility. It is your parent who has a health problem of addiction. Only the substance abuser can solve his or her problem by getting treatment. Nothing you do can make your parent abuse drugs or alcohol, and nothing you do can make your parent stop. It is up to your parent to seek professional help. However, if your parent has a substance abuse problem, you do need to get professional help for yourself. You are living in a situation that is too difficult to deal with on your own. You can look in the phone book for Alateen, a group for What would you do teens whose parents have if your mom or dad was drug or alcohol problems, or abusing alcohol or drugs? Nar-Anon, which helps teens whose parents abuse drugs. You can also find a social worker or psychologist to talk to, by asking a school counselor or consulting the phone book. Finally, if you yourself are abusing drugs or alcohol, get treatment from a doctor, social worker, psychologist, Alcoholics Anonymous, or Narcotics Anonymous. Substance
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Some parents may become violent and abusive when they are anxious about their unemployment. Domestic violence is never an appropriate reaction to stress, and a parent acting this way needs professional help. If you tell someone about the abuse, your parent may get the help they need.
abuse is dangerous, and you need professional help to overcome it.
Family violence Family violence, also called domestic violence, means that a parent brings physical harm to a spouse or child. Family violence includes severe hitting, burning, any violent act that results in cuts or bruises, or neglecting a child so seriously that the child may come to harm. Sexually abusing a child is also a form of domestic violence. Unfortunately, some parents respond to the strains of
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The Effects of Job Loss on the Family unemployment with domestic violence. Those parents who were violent before their job loss may be even more abusive afterward. If your parent is violent, remember that you are not alone; many other teens have suffered abusive parents. Above all, it is crucial that you turn to other adults to get help. Often the victims of family violence are confused and frightened about seeking help. Commonly, they blame themselves for the parent’s violence, believing that they have done something to cause it. It is very important to realize that domestic violence is abuse; it is always wrong and you never deserve it in any way, even if you misbehave. Children may also hesitate to tell anyone about a parent’s violence because they love the parent. Be aware that an abusive parent has a serious problem and needs professional help with it. If you tell someone about the problem, your parent can get help. Further, some children fear that if the parent finds out anyone has been told about the abuse, then he or she will behave even more violently. In fact, when victims don’t seek outside help, the violence almost always gets worse anyway. If your family is experiencing domestic violence, tell someone as soon as you can, for the sake of your whole family, including your abusive parent. You can tell a neighbor, clergyman or woman, teacher, school counselor, coach—any adult you trust to help you. You can also talk to someone at a mental health center or community health clinic, or call the National Domestic Violence Hotline, toll-free, at 1-800-799SAFE (7233). If anyone in your family is in immediate danger, leave the house right away, call 911, and tell the emergency operator your address and what is happening.
Divorce Even in the most well-adjusted families, the stress of unemployment can result in tension between parents. Many couples work out their conflicts and become closer than ever.
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However, sometimes the strain of unemployment leads to divorce or separation, especially if the couple already had conflicts with each other before the job loss occurred. If your parents are divorced or separating, the most important thing to realize is that it is not your fault. Children often believe they are to blame for their parents’ inability to get along with each other. In fact, couples break up only because they have problems with each other. No matter how children behave, they cannot cause a marriage to break up. Divorce is caused by conflicts within a marriage, and there is nothing children can do to affect that. Divorce is challenging for children, especially when added to the difficulties of parental unemployment. Parents struggling with the effects of job loss have even more stress when they separate from each other. They How would you feel have additional financial if your parents decided to get a issues to work out, as well divorce because of the strain as the intense emotions caused by unemployment? connected with the loss of their marriage. Children understandably feel a great deal of anger, sadness, and fear about their parents’ stress and about one of their parents moving out of the house. In time, however, children and parents usually adjust well to divorce. Children cope much more easily if they get support from others. If your parents are divorced or separating, seek as many resources for coping as you can. Read books on divorce, talk to friends who have divorced parents, and turn to people you trust for advice and support—perhaps a relative, neighbor, teacher, school counselor, religious cleric, or psychologist. Remember that although you may not see one parent as much as you used to, both of your parents love you.
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The Effects of Job Loss on the Family
Mortgage or rent payments are usually a family’s biggest expense. While most families will still be able to afford housing during times of unemployment, they may become homeless if they cannot make their payments. Fortunately, there are many government programs to help families in these situations.
Their inability to live with each other does not affect their feelings toward you.
Homelessness Most parents can afford housing even if they lose a job. However, rent or mortgage is a big expense, and some unemployed parents find themselves unable to pay it.
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Their families may become homeless, which means that they have no permanent place to live. Most homeless families are single mothers who don’t have many skills to get jobs. Sometimes homeless families stay at the houses of friends or relatives. If they don’t know anyone who has room for all of them, the family may split up, placing children with one friend or relative, and parents with another. Or the family may have to live in a homeless shelter, a social service facility that gives people a free place to stay temporarily. Homelessness is very tough on children. Shelters are crowded, noisy, and uncomfortable. Even at a friend’s or relative’s house, children may have little privacy to study and hang out. It feels very sad and unsettling to have no place of your own, and it is frightening not to know where you will stay in the long term. Be assured that the great majority of homeless families do not stay homeless for long. Many of the parents find a job that pays enough to get a new home. Further, homeless people are often eligible for government programs that How would you feel either provide housing they if your family became homecan afford or pay for part of less when your mom or dad their rent or mortgage. Other lost a job? programs offer job training, health care, and food to the homeless, helping them to get back on their feet. If your family becomes homeless, your parents can seek help from United Way or other private social service organizations; your state and local government’s housing assistance and social services divisions; and the U.S. Department of Housing and Urban Development.
6 Getting a New Job Michael’s family had always lived in New York City, where his dad worked for an advertising company. But when his dad was laid off, he started looking for jobs in California. Michael was worried: if his dad was offered a job on the west coast, they would have to move, leave all of their friends, and start over at a new school. Michael understood that the economy was bad and jobs were hard to come by, but he wished his dad could be more patient. Why couldn’t he find a job at home, instead of uprooting the whole family?
ost people who lose a job eventually get a new one. However, the search for a job is demanding. The entire family may feel stress about the unemployed parent’s hunt for work. For instance, teens may worry why their parent’s job search takes so much time. They may wonder if their parent is searching effectively, and question his or her ability to get a good job. Teens may also be confused when they sense that
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Getting a New Job
Finding new employment can be a full-time job itself. An applicant must make phone calls, write letters, and interview with potential employers. Having the rights skills for the position and finding a job with an adequate salary are often the most difficult aspects of the job search.
their parent is worried about the job search. And they may be disturbed if their parent’s job search requires the family to move to a new town. It is helpful for teens to get information about how job searches work and about how to cope with the stresses involved.
Job Prospects Over the past several decades, the overall number of jobs has increased in the United States. As a whole, there are more jobs available than jobs lost. This is generally good news for people who lose a job, but several factors can make it hard for an individual to find satisfying employment.
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The Effects of Job Loss on the Family First, the salaries that jobs pay differ widely. Unemployed workers often have difficulty finding a new job that pays as much as they would like. Studies show that only about a third of laid-off workers find a job that pays as much or more than their old position. In addition, some kinds of jobs are harder to find than others. For example, secretarial positions are commonly available, but college professorships are not. Laid-off college instructors have difficulty gaining employment in their chosen field and may need to find another field in which to work. Further, jobs are harder to find during some economic time periods than in others. During a recession, for example, many employers throughout the country are cutting back on jobs, and many people are unemployed. When many people are searching for work and relatively few jobs are available, some people will have to wait to get a job until the recession is over. The way in which people lost their jobs can also affect their prospects for reemployment. For example, people who lost work because of disability must wait to seek employment until they are healed enough. How long their healing takes depends on their illness or injury. Further, as discussed in the first chapter, someone who is fired for cause generally has more difficulty getting a new job than someone who was laid off; new employers are concerned when they learn that a previous employer was dissatisfied with the worker’s performance. In contrast, prospective employers understand that laid-off workers were not at fault for losing their jobs. Another factor that can affect people’s prospects of getting work is their level of job skills. People who have more experience in a given career generally find it
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easier to get work in that field than people who have less experience. Further, people who have a wide range of skills can be candidates for a diverse array of jobs, while people with specialized skills are limited to a narrower range of positions. For example, one librarian How would it feel who loses a job may be to be laid off, and learn that qualified mainly for jobs in you do not have the right job libraries, whereas another skills to find new employment? may have skills in research or computer operation that he or she can apply to many different kinds of work. Further, when technology eliminates a worker’s job, the worker needs new skills to get new employment. For instance, printing and graphic design used to be done by hand but are now done increasingly on computers. People in these fields who lack the necessary computer skills may lose their jobs and need training in order to get work.
Job training Many adults discover that they need further education in order to acquire the skills that qualify them for a satisfying job. Unfortunately, schools can be expensive. However, community and state colleges charge relatively low tuitions. In addition, most large companies and many smaller firms provide laid-off workers with job training, that is, programs that teach the skills needed for new jobs. Government agencies, private social service organizations, and community centers also offer free or low-cost job training programs. Further, people who have a physical disability can attend vocational rehabilitation agencies, specially designed to train people with disabilities to get employment.
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If a person is laid off, their former employer may help them find a new position. Otherwise, the unemployed person can look for a job by signing up with employment agencies, looking in the newspaper for open positions, or networking with family and friends who may know of an open position.
Job searches There are several ways unemployed people look for work. First, their former company may help them find a new job. The company may provide them with lists of available jobs, or the employer may refer them to other firms. Former coworkers may also provide them with tips. Second, an unemployed person can sign up with an employment agency; this is an organization that tries to match workers with employers who are looking to hire. Third, a job seeker can ask friends, acquaintances, and relatives if they know of potential positions. Fourth, newspaper classified sections and magazines about industries
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and careers advertise jobs. Finally, job seekers can check the Yellow Pages, library reference books, or the Internet to find firms where they would like to work, and then contact the firms to let them know of their interest.
Stress Looking for a job is a big job itself. It requires a great deal of research, phone calls, and letter writing. When writing applications for positions, job seekers must carefully present their skills in the most attractive light they can to potential employers. They must also meet prospective employers in person or on the phone, when again they must show that they are well qualified for the work. Those who are attending classes to gain new skills have even more demands on their time and energy. Although most unemployed people find adequate new jobs, they usually do not get them right away. Commonly, they must apply for many positions before they get one. The job hunt may take many months. The longer it takes, How would you feel the more tired, frustrated, if you were unemployed for a and anxious job seekers may long time and trying to find a become. Their self-esteem new job? may also suffer. They may blame themselves for their continuing unemployment, even though they may be perfectly capable job applicants. Sometimes so many qualified people apply for a job that one of them gets the position only by luck. Children may also worry about their parent’s job search. Teens can cope more easily if they understand that it is normal for a job search to be demanding and challenging. Remember that although your parents may be having a rough time now, they will most likely be successful in the
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Searching for a new job can be very stressful for parents. Children can help relieve some of this stress by helping out around the house, or by giving their parents tips on using the computer and Internet for job searches.
end. You may also feel better if you talk with your parents about how the job search is going. Hearing a lot of details about the job search may overwhelm you, but getting a general sense of the job hunt can be very reassuring. It helps give you confidence that your parent is working hard to get employment, and it helps clear up confusion by providing you with a realistic picture of his or her prospects. Children cannot get their parents a job, but they can help to relieve their parents’ stress. For example, you can lighten your parent’s load by doing household chores. You can
Getting a New Job keep the phone available to parents and take accurate phone messages for them. If you are more computer savvy than your parent, you can show him or her how to type letters or search the Web. You can also help your parents a great deal just by showing that you care about them.
Moving Sometimes a parent’s job search requires the family to move to a new town. Fewer jobs may be available in the family’s local area than in another region. Parents may move because they believe they have a better chance of finding a job in another region, or they may actually be offered a job in a new location. Moving is stressful for a family. Any big change is hard to adjust to. It is natural to miss your old home and neighborhood, and to feel distressed about leaving friends behind. It is also hard to feel that the decision to move is based on your parents’ job requirements, not your own desires. On the other hand, millions of Americans move each year, and most manage to cope very well. If your family must relocate, try to see the positive aspects of the move. Remember that the move benefits the whole family—you as well as your parents—since it enables your parent to get work again. It also helps to view the move as an opportunity for you to gain new experiences and meet new people. Try to find good features of the new location, perhaps a beautiful landscape, a fun park or YMCA, good shopping, or a cool bedroom in your new house or apartment. It is helpful to get information about the new place before you move, to learn about its good qualities and to know what to expect. Teens also need support from others to cope with moving. Share your concerns with your friends, and arrange with them to keep in touch after you move. It is also useful to discuss your feelings about the move with your parents. Your
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The Effects of Job Loss on the Family
parents probably feel some anxiety about moving too, so they can sympathize with you, as well as make an effort to make the move easier on you. You can also get help from a mental health professional, religious cleric, or trusted teacher. How would you feel However good a move is if your mom or dad found a for the family, it is normal to job in a different city, and feel rather nervous and sad you family had to move? about it. You may be so upset that you believe you will never feel settled in your new place. Although it may be hard to believe, you will adjust with time. Practice coping skills, be patient, and allow the adjustment to happen.
Reemployment Once their parents get a new job, teens may find that they have gained valuable lessons from their experience of parental unemployment, difficult though it was. The experience can lend teens knowledge about how job searches work, knowledge that will help them when they become adults and seek their own careers. Further, teens who learn how to cope with the difficulties of a parent’s job loss can apply their coping skills to other life experiences. They may gain confidence that they can endure and surmount hardships. They may also feel that sharing a tough experience with their parents has brought them closer together. Parental job loss is challenging, but there are ways to deal with the difficulties. To learn more about parental unemployment, its effects on the family, and ways of coping, see the resources listed at the end of this book. You can also seek out other teenagers you may know whose families have experienced job loss. Finally, talk to your parents to help you understand their own employment circumstances.
Glossary Disability – an illness or injury that prevents an employee from working. Fired for cause – when an employee is asked to leave a job because his or her performance is not satisfactory to an employer. Layoff – letting go an employee in order to reduce a business’s expenses. Also called a reduction in force (RIF). Merger – when two companies join together to form one large company, which may lead to layoffs. Recession – a period of time during which the nation’s economy slows down, which often leads to increased unemployment. Resignation – the act of voluntarily leaving a job. Severance pay – a sum of money paid to an employee who is laid off. Unemployment insurance – a state-run program that temporarily provides payments to people who lose their job through no fault of their own. Workers’ Compensation – payments made by the state government to employees who are injured on the job and unable to work.
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Further Reading Beyer, Cathy, Doris Pike, and Loretta McGovern. Surviving Unemployment: A Family Handbook for Weathering Hard Times. New York: Henry Holt and Co, 1993. National Youth Crisis Hotline. (Provides professional counseling to young people who feel they are having trouble.) 1-800-HIT-HOME (1-800-448-4663). Ryan, Elizabeth A. Straight Talk About Parents. New York: Dell, 1989. St. Pierre, Stephanie. Everything You Need to Know When a Parent Is Out of Work. Revised ed. New York: Rosen Publishing Group, 1997. Wijnberg, Ellen. Parental Unemployment. Austin, Texas: Steck-Vaughn, 1994.
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Index Anger, 29-30 Anxiety, 30, 33 Anxiety disorder, 34 Blame, 30, 33, 36-37, 38 Breathing exercises, 40 Budgets, 22-23, 24, 25, 26-27 Coping, 35, 36-43 by accepting feelings, 43 with financial effects, 19, 23-26 by helping parents, 37-39 by helping yourself, 39-41 with support, 41-43 Counselors, 41 Crying, 29 Depression, 34, 39 Disability, 14, 20-21, 30, 54, 55 Disappointment, 29, 33 Divorce, 44, 48-50 Drug and alcohol abuse, 16, 41, 45-47 Economy, and layoffs, 13-14 Emotions, 28-35 of child, 32-34 and learning about job loss, 17 and mental health problems, 34
of parent, 29-31 and parent’s behavior, 31-32 positive, 34-35 Employment agency, 56 Family violence, 44, 47-48 Finances, 18-27 and budgets, 22-23, 24, 25, 26-27 coping with, 19, 23-26 and financial resources, 20-21 and part-time jobs, 26-27, 43 and poor families, 21-22, 24 Fired for cause, 16, 54 Food stamps, 22 Fun, 40-41 Government aid, 20-22, 51 Health care, 24, 29 Homelessness, 44, 50-51 Insecurity, 33-34 Job discrimination, 16 Job skills, 54-55 Layoffs, 11-14, 20, 21, 54, 55 Medicaid, 24 Mental health problems, 34 Mergers, 13
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Moving, 59-60 Networking, 56 New jobs, 52-60 and fired workers, 16 and job prospects, 53-55 and job searches, 56-57 and job training, 55 and moving, 59-60 and stress, 57-59 Part-time jobs, 26-27, 43 Poor families, resources for, 21-22, 24 Positive mental picture, 39-40 Recession, 12, 54 Religious activities, 40 Resignation, 14-16 Sadness, 29 Salaries, 54 Schoolwork, 39 Self-esteem, 30-31 Severance pay, 20 Shock, 29 Single mother, 21 Technology and layoffs, 12-13 and new jobs, 55 Temporary Assistance for Needy Families, 22 Unemployment insurance, 20, 21 Workers’ Compensation, 20
About the Author Michele Alpern is the author of numerous works on social issues, including Teen Pregnancy (Chelsea House, 2002). She is a Ph.D. candidate at Rutgers University. She is also an artist.
About the Editor Marvin Rosen is a licensed clinical psychologist who practices in Media, Pennsylvania. He received his doctorate degree from the University of Pennsylvania in 1961. Since 1963, he has worked with intellectually and emotionally challenged people at Elwyn, Inc. in Pennsylvania, with clinical, administrative, research, and training responsibilities. He also conducts a private practice of psychology. Dr. Rosen has taught psychology at the University of Pennsylvania, Bryn Mawr College, and West Chester University. He has written or edited seven books and numerous professional articles in the areas of psychology, rehabilitation, emotional disturbance, and mental retardation.
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