Stealing Northe

STEALING NORTHE

…“I want to be with you, Amy.” He felt a brief sizzle of shame as he remembered the previous night, Leon’s hand wrapped around his prick so tight it was almost painful while he was lost in fantasies of her. “I know I shouldn’t.” Her breath was even hotter than her flesh, washing over the heel of his hand and up his arm until it prickled along his chest. “I know I’m too old for you. You’re young, you should have someone closer to your own age, and you and Leon probably won’t stay anyway, but…” She edged forward until their bodies pressed lightly together. Kenneth hated that her heavy coat kept him from feeling her plush curves better. “That doesn’t change how I feel.” He would never believe that she was too old for him. Kenneth hadn’t spared a second thought to her probable age. All that mattered was what Amy felt—what they both felt. He wrapped his arm around Amy’s body, holding her even closer. Kenneth tilted his head, his lips just skimming over her brow. When he took a deep breath, he smelled her stew and dumplings, her soap, her fire, her sweat—a scent that was already beginning to make him think of home. “It doesn’t matter that you’re older than me. I’m not a boy. I’ll stay as long as I can. I promise you that much.” She moved against his arm with a graceful strength, knowing and assured, like she’d taken control that first night. Her mouth lifted, lips parting, and the tip of her tongue darted

out to moisten them in a motion so delicate it made him ache. But there wasn’t time to savor how they glistened, or wonder why it was she’d come to him. She stretched upward, brushing her mouth over his. It almost tickled. It most definitely teased. Amy kept it gentle until a shiver rippled through her. Then she firmed the contact, finally offering the kisses he’d wanted to claim for hours now…

ALSO BY JAMIE CRAIG At The Advent Of Dusk Double Down Fortune’s Honor His Very Own Keeping Time A Little Bit Bewitched Nowhere Man Time In A Bottle Calendar Boys, Vol. I & II The Master Chronicles Book I: Master Of Obsidian Book II: Unveiled Book III: Mosaic Moon Book IV: Seduction In Black And White Book V: Chaos & Communion Book VI: Dominion Calendar Boys January: Miami’s Perfect Weekend February: Mine March: Kiss Me April: Out Of The Storm May: Corazón June: Commencement July: Vintage August: Scorched September: A Simple Truth

STEALING NORTHE BY JAMIE CRAIG

AMBER Q UILL PRESS, LLC http://www.AmberQuill.com

STEALING NORTHE AN AMBER QUILL PRESS BOOK This book is a work of fiction. All names, characters, locations, and incidents are products of the author’s imagination, or have been used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons living or dead, locales, or events is entirely coincidental. Amber Quill Press, LLC http://www.AmberQuill.com All rights reserved. No portion of this book may be transmitted or reproduced in any form, or by any means, without permission in writing from the publisher, with the exception of brief excerpts used for the purposes of review. Copyright © 2008 by Pepper Espinoza & Vivien Dean ISBN 978-1-60272-369-6 Cover Art © 2008 Trace Edward Zaber

Layout and Formatting provided by: Elemental Alchemy

PUBLISHED IN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA

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CHAPTER 1 Whistling wind made Amy Northe anxious, especially when it was as frigid as the gales whipping through Yellow Rock. It always presaged change, whether it announced a storm that would keep them locked away for days on end, or something else entirely, like the winds that had blown the side off her parents’ house when she was only seven. They’d had to move after that. Her mother had never been the same. The January storm that had blasted through the tiny Utah mining town two days earlier looked to be turning back. Clouds rolled thick and black overhead, while the winds erased the fresh dusting over the packed snow. Temperatures had dropped drastically since lunchtime, giving Amy no 1

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choice but to haul in more firewood. She needed to stock up for the night. If the snows returned, it would be a difficult task to clear it away from her stores, even protected as it was beneath the lean-to at the side of the house. She just prayed that the cord she’d recently purchased would be enough to see them through to spring. With the winter already raging harder than usual, Amy feared there would be bitterly cold nights in their future. Her fingers were too numb to fumble for the front door. Amy kicked at the bottom, and stomped her foot to get the blood circulating. The wind filled her head, in spite of the scarf wrapped over the lower half of her face and ears. When the door opened, she rushed in blindly, simply grateful to be inside. “You want me to get the next load, Ma?” Amy shook her head as she dropped the wood onto the pile next to the fireplace. “You need to go check on Rocky and Hazel,” she instructed, unwinding the scarf from her head. “Make sure they’re bedded in good and tight. Give ’em enough feed to last through the morning, in case we can’t get out to the barn come sun-up.” “Do we need milk, too?” She glanced up to see Woodrow already bundled tight in his jacket and gloves. At nine years old, he was small and lithe, built more like his father than her. For a split second, she debated going out to do the animals herself. She wasn’t too cold yet, and she was stronger than Woody. But she took one look at his fierce blue eyes and knew she couldn’t deny him 2

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this. He was growing up. He wanted more responsibility around the house than she was comfortable allowing him. She needed to start trusting that he could handle it. “We’ve got enough to tide us over. Just get them warm and fed, and get back in here for supper.” “Yes, ma’am.” Amy turned her back on the fresh gale through the house as he slipped outside. The fire danced in the hearth, calming again once he shut the door. The scent of stew bubbling over the flames made her stomach growl, and not for the first time that night, she debated making dumplings. Dumplings were good comfort food. She’d already held back adding the beef Mary Hull had given her as payment for setting her youngest son’s broken arm. The soft pastry would make up for it. Leaving her coat and mittens to dry by the fire, Amy pulled out the flour, salt, and baking powder from the cupboard and set them on the narrow table. She ducked quickly into the back larder, grabbing the bucket of milk she stored there. Ice had formed over the top. It would be delicious in the morning, provided it wasn’t frozen solid. Maybe she’d make extra biscuits tonight to have for breakfast. It would give them extra time under the blankets if she didn’t have to worry about cooking. Glass rattled in the window frames as she made the dough. Amy tried to block it out, focusing on the rhythm of her stirring, the slow thaw of her flesh. It wouldn’t be so bad if it wasn’t so dark already. The night would be long, especially after she sent Woody to bed. She could distract herself with 3

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some mending she’d taken in, but after she crawled under her blankets, sleep would be elusive. It always was. It had been for the last six years, ever since Woody’s father had passed away. Ernest Northe had been her companion, in friendship and then in marriage, from the moment they’d met. His premature death had changed her entire life. Amy shook her head. Thoughts of Ernest were as bad as dwelling on the storm. Neither did her any good. She had a child to feed and a night to get through. She didn’t have time for sentimental ruminations. She finished the dough and turned toward the fire, bending low to gently drop each spoonful of the mixture into the simmering stew. Amy heard the latch in the door lift, but her heart jumped to her throat when the wind caught the door and slammed it against the wall. “Sorry!” Woody’s voice sounded impossibly small compared to the rising gales outside, and she might not have heard it at all if she wasn’t in the habit of listening to every single sound her son made, from the catch of his breath to the words he muttered in his sleep. “It’s fine. No harm done,” Amy said, straightening. “Do you need me to help?” “No. Kenneth’s got it.” “Kenneth?” Amy spun around and stopped short. A tall man held the door shut against the wind, his hair obscured by a battered hat and his face half-hidden by a dusty bandana. He wasn’t alone, 4

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either. A shorter man stood beside him—no, not standing. He was leaning heavily against the wall, the familiar stance of a man in dire pain. The sound of the latch locking boomed in the small cabin, louder than anything Amy had ever heard before. Woody stood by the two men, beaming at her, like he expected a reward for finding the drifters and bringing them directly into their home. “Ma, this is Kenneth. And Leon.” The man who shut the door turned toward her and nodded. “Ma’am. I don’t mean to intrude but…” “Woodrow Michael Northe, I thought I told you to go take care of the animals in the barn!” Amy darted forward and grabbed his arm, pulling him away from the strangers. She dragged him back until the table stood between them and the two men, but she didn’t dare take her eyes off them for a second. “What on earth were you doing?” Woody squirmed within her grasp, but it only drove her to tighten her hold. “I did, Ma. I did exactly what you told me. That’s where I found ’em.” In her barn. Two men she didn’t recognize. Her stomach clenched. “Ma’am, we just need a little help,” the man said in a rush. He held up his hands, palms out. “Leon is really hurt, and if he doesn’t get some help…we’re not going to hurt you. We don’t want to hurt anybody.” “What were you doing in my barn, then?” “Resting. The storm is getting worse and Leon needed to rest. We planned to just stop for a few minutes and move on, 5

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but Leon can’t even ride in this wind.” The man spoke quickly, his hands still in the air. The other one, Leon, didn’t move from his place on the wall. She moved her gaze over him quickly, looking for any signs of the supposed injury. He favored his right foot, and the bottom of his jeans was stiff with blood. “Get him in the chair.” Amy issued the command before she could change her mind. She couldn’t send an injured man out into this storm, even if she didn’t know who he was. She’d never forgive herself. “Get his boot off. I’ll take a look at it.” She let Woody go, but steered him away from the men, guiding him to sit next to the fire. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw the one named Kenneth lead his friend to the chair and darted to the back larder to fetch a bowl of water and a washrag. “Goddamnit, Ken.” She heard the growl as though Leon was right next to her ear. “I’m sorry. Just hold still.” “Tell that kid to stop staring at me.” “Ignore him. And hold still.” The next thing she heard was a muffled cry, like Leon was biting on his hand to stop the sound. She hurried back into the small room to find Leon sitting on the kitchen chair, his leg stretched in front of him. His ankle was swollen to an impressive size, the skin stretch tight around the broken bone, a shade of purple that was almost black. Woody stared, entranced by the injury the way only a small child could be. Kenneth and Leon wore matching grimaces, but Leon’s eyes 6

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were dark with pain. “What happened?” She crouched at Leon’s feet, frowning as she got a closer look. “Woody, bring my kit. And my scissors.” “Yes, ma’am.” Amy listened to him scurry off, squelching her trepidation at how eager he sounded. “I’m going to need to cut your pants in order to clean and set it properly. How long have you been riding with it broken like this?” “He…uh…fell off his horse.” “I didn’t…” “A snake spooked his horse,” Kenneth quickly added. “That was about…seven days ago.” “You’re lucky you didn’t break your neck.” Woody appeared at her side. Amy took the scissors as he set the box of her medical supplies on the floor. Gripping the frozen edge of Leon’s pants, she pulled them taut, blocking out his grunt of pain as it jarred his ankle. “Sorry,” she muttered. She cut up the seam, exposing more of the man’s calf. The shadow Kenneth cast at her side was thick and heavy, heavy enough for her to feel in her bones. “Why don’t you get out of those wet things and warm up? Before I have two patients on my hands.” “Ma’am? I don’t have any dry clothes to wear. I can help, though. Tell me what to do.” She didn’t want help. She wanted her quiet evening back. But Amy gritted her teeth and nodded, dipping her rag into the water and soaking it. 7

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“First of all, take your hat off when you’re inside my house. I can’t splint this until we get the swelling down. That means wrapping this in hot bandages and keeping him immobile. Get some more water and heat it in the fire. Woody, show him where the bowls are, then go grab an extra blanket from the chest and lay it out in front of the fire.” Amy watched Woody jump to her instructions, simultaneously keeping an eye on the stranger closest to her son and washing Leon’s foot. Kenneth looked lost for a moment, until Woody thrust a smaller pot in his hand. While Woody went for the blankets, Kenneth pushed the door open again and filled the pot with snow, then returned to set it on the fire. The snow on the outside of the pan hissed and popped as it met the red coals. Once the snow was melting, he helped the boy prepare the makeshift bed on the floor, quietly asking Woody to straighten the corners and the edges. Leon remained silent while she worked, his skin pulled tight over his face. Occasionally, his breath would quicken, but that was the only audible sign of his pain. She worked with delicate fingers, barely moving the cold rag over the swollen skin, careful to collect the sweat and dirt without applying too much pressure to the area. She had never seen a break this bad before, and she didn’t understand how he could have kept his foot in his narrow boot for a week. She had a feeling this was the first time he had seen the damage to his foot, because if he had removed the boot, he wouldn’t have been able to get it back on again. “I’ll get the bandages, Ma,” Woody volunteered, before 8

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she had the chance to issue a new set of instructions. The bandages were really just strips of rags she had been able to scavenge in Yellow Rock. She kept them in a bag near her bed, and Woody had helped her enough times to know exactly where to find them. Kenneth was hovering again. “We are much obliged, ma’am. We can pay you, too.” It was a small measure of relief, though she would not have refused to aid them if they couldn’t. “You’ll have to sleep on the floor next to your friend,” she said as she tossed aside her dirty rag. Woody had the hot water already waiting by the time she picked up the first bandage. “These have to be changed as soon as they start to cool if we want the swelling to go down enough to splint it.” Kenneth hunkered down beside the chair, and Leon immediately grabbed his shoulder. Now that he was directly in her line of sight, she could study him more closely. Dirty blond hair hung over his forehead and into his light eyes— they may have been gray or a light blue. He had strong features—sharp nose, square jaw, high cheekbones—that might have been too overpowering to be handsome, but his youth helped soften the edges. His worried gaze darted between his friend’s foot and Amy’s face. “But we will be able to get the swelling down, right? It’s not too late?” “It shouldn’t be.” “Ma’s the best nurse in Yellow Rock,” Woody piped up. “She’ll fix him.” Amy certainly didn’t need her son selling her services to 9

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strangers, but his support was oddly warming anyway. “Supper will be ready in a little bit. It’s just some stew, but you’re welcome to share it with us.” Of course, if they had their own food to contribute, she’d welcome that, too, though she’d hardly say something so greedy out loud. “Thank you. We haven’t had a decent meal since before Leon’s accident. Game’s scarce.” Amy gently wrapped the first bandage around Leon’s foot, and she couldn’t tell if his whimper was one of pain or of relief. The second warm bandage elicited the same half-moan, half-whimper. “She’s almost done,” Kenneth murmured. Leon didn’t respond. When Amy glanced up, she saw his eyes were closed and his head tilted back. “It’s probably better if he sleeps,” she said when she saw the concern on Kenneth’s face. They might be strangers, but they were still men in need. Her heart went out to them. Their obvious exhaustion and clear need called to every protective instinct she had. “The stew will keep so he can eat when he wakes up.” “He just made it worse for himself. I’ve been trying to convince him we need help for the past five days. But he’s stubborn.” Stubborn almost cost him his foot. Wrapping the final bandage around the swollen flesh, Amy glanced between that and the discarded boot. “You’ll have to go to the mercantile when the storm dies down. He’s going to need bigger shoes to fit around the splint. I can mend the pants, but there’s no way 10

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he’s getting this foot into that boot until it’s better healed.” “How long…how long will it take before he can just wear his own boot?” Amy frowned. She hadn’t thought money was so much of an issue since he’d offered to pay for her services. “He’s going to need the splint for a few weeks, at the very least. And that bone isn’t going to be strong enough not to break again for six. If he’s as stubborn as you say, he can probably shove his foot into that boot in two weeks, but I wouldn’t recommend it.” “How soon can he ride?” “Well, sooner than that if he doesn’t mind wrapping his foot in something to keep it warm.” She sat back on her heels, staring at him in confusion. “You got somewhere you have to be?” “We were heading home. South to New Mexico territory. We got blown a bit off-track because of the blizzards and Leon’s ankle. He’ll want to start moving again as soon as he can.” Amy understood the impulse to get home. She’d had to fight it for months after Ernest had died. Yellow Rock had been the home they’d made together, but without him around to anchor her, her differences with the community only separated her further. They didn’t like that she wasn’t Mormon, or the way she refused advances on marrying again. But her skills were too necessary in a place where accidents were common. And time had slipped by on her, until she knew she couldn’t just uproot Woody without good cause. “He’s certainly not going anywhere tonight.” Rising to her 11

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feet, she went around to the other side of the chair, slipping her arm behind Leon’s back. He was thicker than Kenneth was, his weight obvious. “Help me stretch him out on the blankets. Your job tonight is to keep changing those bandages until the swelling’s gone.” Kenneth straightened and hooked his arm beneath Leon’s knees, the other arm going around his back. On the count of three, they lifted him from the chair, Kenneth supporting most of his weight. Moving together, they carefully lowered him to the blanket. He didn’t stir or give any indication that they had disturbed him. “If we have to stay for a few days, we can bed down in the barn.” She met his clear eyes over Leon’s body and nodded. It was ridiculous to think they were going anywhere with this broken ankle slowing them down, especially in this storm. “You’ll do chores around here, too. Hauling wood and whatever I need done. I’ll keep and feed you, but everybody pulls their weight in my house.” “I’ll do all the chores around here, if you want.” Kenneth knelt beside their unconscious patient and pried off his other boot. “If you don’t mind me asking, ma’am, where’s your husband?” When Amy took a moment too long to answer, Woody chimed in. “It’s just me and Ma. My Pa died when I was three.” Amy avoided the glance Kenneth shot her by straightening and grabbing her pot holder to check on the dumplings. “Wash 12

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up. Supper’s just about ready.” “The basin is over here,” Woody said. Kenneth obediently stood and followed Woody across the small cabin to the narrow basin. He gasped as his hands touched the water, and Amy thought there’d be a film of ice over the water by the next morning. She listened as he scrubbed his skin clean with the rough soap, and murmured his thanks to Woody as the boy handed him a towel. When he sat at the table, he looked even younger than before, as though he had washed his age away with the dirt. “You can sleep in here tonight next to your friend.” Amy dished out two plates of stew and carried them to the table. “Even if we end up splinting before the dawn.” “Thank you. This looks delicious and smells better.” Despite his announcement, he didn’t start eating. She asked him if he needed anything else, and Kenneth shook his head. After a few seconds, Amy realized he was waiting for her. She dished up a plate for herself and sat across from him. He still didn’t make a move to touch the food. Without taking her eyes away from him, she took a small bite. Only then did he finally dig in, and he couldn’t conceal the bliss on his face as he tasted what must have been his first real meal in over a week. Amy ducked her head in order to hide her smile. It had been a long time since she’d shared a table with someone who so obviously appreciated the effort she made. Woody was a good boy, but he took a lot of things for granted. Something as simple as Kenneth’s groans of satisfaction as he devoured his 13

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meal went a long way to making her feel more hospitable.

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CHAPTER 2 The fire warming his back and the beautiful woman in front of him went a long way toward soothing Kenneth’s nerves. He couldn’t tell if Leon was asleep or unconscious on the floor, and if anything, the storm outside sounded worse. Kenneth knew they were extremely lucky to be where they were. Leon had resisted taking shelter in Amy’s barn at all, and he had been furious when the boy found them—his anger only increasing when Kenneth half-carried, half-dragged Leon to the cabin. They needed help. Regardless of the risk involved, they needed help. Leon didn’t want to hang, but Kenneth didn’t want to be responsible for sawing off Leon’s foot when it 15

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became infected. They couldn’t run very far or very fast with a break like that, anyway. This wasn’t the first time Leon had passed out from the pain, this was just the first time he passed out in a chair and not on the back of his horse. He was confident Leon would thank him in the morning for seeking help and finding it in the cabin of Mrs. Amy Northe. They could do much worse than take aid from a woman like her. She sat in the chair with Leon’s pants, carefully stitching them by the light of the fire. Kenneth was exhausted, his eyes and bones aching, but he needed to watch Leon and periodically melt more snow over the fire for the rags. They needed to be changed about every twenty minutes, and Kenneth couldn’t tell if they were making any difference to the swelling. Amy didn’t seem worried, though, so he decided he wouldn’t worry either. Unlike him, she knew what she was doing. As they had traveled closer to Yellow Rock, he had heard the name Amy Northe more and more. She saw to the miners and their families—by herself. The small town didn’t have a doctor, from what Kenneth understood. He had dragged Leon miles off their course so they could make a detour to Yellow Rock, Leon protesting the entire time even as the pain sapped the color from his face and the light from his eyes. He hadn’t actually intended to ask Mrs. Northe for help. He just needed some supplies; however, he was grateful Woody had found them, and even more grateful that Amy Northe hadn’t shot them on sight. “I’m worried this storm isn’t going to stop by morning,” 16

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Kenneth said, partly because it was true, partly for something to say. Though her fingers didn’t pause, she glanced up at him through her lashes. Firelight made her eyes glow, flecks of gold dancing over the midnight irises. Tendrils of dark hair fell from the knot at her neck, wisping over her cheek and jaw. She had to be at least ten years older than him, but she was still one of the prettiest women he’d ever seen. A heart-shaped face, full lips that looked luscious even when she chewed on the lower one as she worked, skin that looked so soft his fingers itched to touch it. As tired as he was, he could probably stay up all night if he had her to watch. “No, it probably won’t. Storms around here tend to tuck themselves in and stay awhile.” Kenneth wasn’t surprised. He wasn’t sure how high Yellow Rock was, but he knew that they had been on a steady incline for the past two days, winding higher and higher into the Rocky Mountains. Leon hadn’t wanted to venture deeper into the Utah territory, and he especially hadn’t wanted to get themselves trapped on top of a mountain, but Kenneth didn’t really see their alternatives. Leon was too injured to travel far, and it was winter everywhere. They weren’t going to escape the snow. They both glanced over to the small bed as Woody sighed and rolled to his side. Amy watched for several seconds after he settled, clearly prepared to drop everything and go to him if Woody needed her. “He’s a good kid. Brave. Smart, too.” 17

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“Yes.” Love shone even through her soft tone, but when she turned back to Kenneth, her more proper demeanor had returned. “I’m guessing your horses are in the barn?” “Yes, we left them hobbled in there. I think they needed a rest more than we did.” “How far have you come?” “About two hundred and thirty miles. We started in…” Kenneth stopped short, remembering his earlier lie. It wouldn’t make sense to tell her they had started near Monticello and rode north, as fast they dared. “Near Fort Bridger. In the Wyoming territory.” Her brows lifted slightly in surprise. “That’s a long way from home for you. Especially when one of you is wounded like that.” “We were already on our way when Leon was injured.” Which, technically, was true. He didn’t want to lie to this woman, especially when she had been so kind to them. But he couldn’t tell her the truth either, for her sake as well as theirs. “But we kept moving because we wanted to beat the snow. I guess we should have known better than to try to outrun winter.” Her features smoothed again, her mouth curving into a small smile. “No, around here, winter always wins.” They lapsed into silence again as she resumed her stitching, though it felt warmer than it had before. Her long fingers danced with the needle and thread, reminding him of how sure she’d seemed tending to Leon’s leg. All the rumors he’d heard had been true. He was glad something was finally 18

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going their way. “As long as I’ve got these out, do you have anything you need mending?” Her gaze jumped over his clothing. “Though I’m going to have to wash those soon. They probably haven’t seen soap since you left Wyoming, am I right?” Kenneth smiled. “Yes, ma’am, and I can’t vouch that they’ve ever seen soap before that. I don’t have any mending, though. All of my clothes are in good repair.” Even if he did have mending, he couldn’t imagine imposing further on Amy. He didn’t want her to worry about their clothes, or food, or bedding. She only needed to concentrate on Leon. Kenneth slowly unwrapped the bandages from his foot, the way she had shown him, then dipped them in the hot water. The dim light hid the real horror of Leon’s foot—skin shouldn’t be that shade of purple, and a bone shouldn’t look so twisted and mangled. “I know it doesn’t look it, but it’s already going down.” He hadn’t heard her rise from her chair. One moment he was alone, the next, Amy crouched down next to him. She pointed at the inflammation along the arch of his foot. “See here? That was straight across when we got that boot off him.” Kenneth nodded. Now that she pointed it out, he could see the difference. “I didn’t know hot compresses would help with the swelling. If I had, I would have tried it immediately.” “You were focused on getting home. You had your head elsewhere.” Her skirt pooled slightly around her as she sat back against the wall, watching him work. “Is someone waiting for you down in New Mexico? Is that why you’re in 19

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such a hurry to get back?” Kenneth used the excuse of the bandages to stall for time. Lies had a way of breeding more lies, and he just wasn’t good at keeping his story straight. Leon was good at that. Leon was the talker, the charmer, the one who could get them out of a tight spot with a dozen half-truths spinning into one very spectacular story. For Kenneth, the best way to keep everything straight in his head was to stay as close to the truth as possible. “No, nobody is waiting for me anywhere. Me and Leon travel a lot, looking for work.” “Must be hard this time of year. I imagine it doesn’t snow so much down where you’re from then.” “No, it doesn’t. We both grew up in southern Texas. Neither one of us knows what to make of this snow.” Kenneth finished wrapping Leon’s foot and sat back on his heels. “What about you? Does it snow this much where you’re from? Or are you from here?” “No, not here. I’m from Pennsylvania originally. But Ernest and I moved west after he got back from the War.” “Why did you stop in Utah? Most people push on to California, don’t they?” A faint pink rose in her cheeks, and she turned her head in order to gaze into the fire. “I lost a baby on the way. Ernest didn’t want me traveling and making things worse. So we just kind of stayed.” “Oh.” Kenneth swallowed. A baby. A husband. What else had she lost? Kenneth almost understood what she had gone 20

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through. Leon was the only friend he had in the world, and that moment when Leon had fallen from his horse and Kenneth thought he was dead had nearly destroyed him. “I’m sorry. Maybe I should stop asking questions now.” “No, that’s all right. It was all a long time ago.” She glanced at him, almost smiling again. “And something tells me that if you stop talking, you’ll fall asleep. Which you should, but not until we get your friend’s ankle splinted.” “I’m definitely going to pass out. I’m just trying to stave off the inevitable until Leon doesn’t need my help anymore. I’ve been keeping him safe for the past week.” “And who’s been keeping you safe?” “Leon was doing what he could to return the favor. When he was awake.” “So maybe it’s good you found my barn. It sounds like you both can use the rest.” “Right now, it feels like finding your barn was the best thing that ever happened to us,” Kenneth said, looking up from Leon to meet Amy’s eyes. The firelight cast a golden sheen to her skin. It softened the tiny lines at the corners of her eyes, and made her seem even more beautiful, if that was possible. “I was thinking earlier that the wind always brings change with it,” she said quietly. “Maybe stopping here is just a sign that things are about to get better for you.” “I hope you’re right. I…” He paused as the walls rattled with the force of a new gust. Kenneth looked out the one small, square window but he saw nothing except an empty 21

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void. It was so dark, he couldn’t even see the snow. “I don’t think we would have made it through tonight.” He touched the back of her hand briefly. “Now I’m thinking about all those old stories my grandmother used to tell me about weary travelers meeting their guardian angels.” She surprised him by laughing lightly. “Did your grandmother ask what to do when your guardian angel turns out to be a nine-year-old boy who hates to make his bed? Because you owe Woody for bringing you inside. He’s got the softest heart of anyone you’ll ever meet.” “My grandmother would have been thrilled to meet a nineyear-old boy who also happens to be a guardian angel. She would have stuffed him with cookies and assured him he’d never have to make his bed again.” Kenneth smiled a little. “He just walked right up to us and introduced himself, as polite as could be. He was very concerned that we didn’t have any blankets or proper coats.” Her head tilted, her smile softening. “Why didn’t you have proper coats? If you’ve been up north, surely it’s colder up there.” Kenneth stared at her, knowing he was going to face more trouble with each second that passed. Why couldn’t Leon wake up and protect them both from Kenneth’s big mouth? “Gambling.” He looked at her with what he hoped was sheepish eyes, and not just guilty ones. “A game in Cheyenne. Our coats were the most valuable things we owned, so…” He struggled not to sigh in relief when she shook her head in disapproval. “Well, you’re not going to find any games 22

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around here, so don’t go thinking you’re going to win anything back. But we’re going to have to do something to replace them, or you’ll never make it home without frostbite.” “I’m not going to look for any more games. I’m not going to be anybody’s sucker more than once. You’re right about the coats, though. We’ll stop at the general store on the way out of town and buy a few.” Amy seemed to accept his explanation without further questions, a fact for which Kenneth was more than thankful. “Just don’t go falling off any horses.” Her teasing tone took a moment to sink in, before he remembered the first lie that had started this whole mess. “You won’t have me around to set more broken bones.” “No more gambling, no more falling off horses, and buy warm coats.” Boldly, he touched her hand again, knowing he shouldn’t take such liberties with her—she wasn’t a whore after all—but wanting very much to feel the texture of her skin. “You’re already making our lives better.” Her gaze lowered to the fold of his fingers over hers, but it took several seconds—long ones he felt burning into his skin—for her to pull back and fold her hands in her lap. She couldn’t quite meet his eyes, either. “You’ve probably just been on the road long enough to forget what it’s like having someone like your mama or aunt or the like bossing you around.” “It’s been longer than you think,” Kenneth muttered. His attention was drawn to Leon, and the fear that had been hovering over him descended onto his shoulders once again. 23

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“He’s going to be okay, right?” “I wouldn’t lie to you about something as important as a man’s health.” Amy leaned forward and touched the edge of a bandage, testing its temperature. “We just have to make sure he understands that if he tries to use it too soon, he’s going to risk breaking it all over again.” “Hopefully a bit of common sense will overrule his stubborn streak. Though I have a feeling you don’t let anybody stay too stubborn for long.” She rewarded him with another small smile. “Life’s too short to act foolish. But something tells me, that’s a lesson you’ve already learned.” Kenneth couldn’t help but snort at her comment. “Yes, I’ve definitely learned my lesson about acting foolish.” Unfortunately, he didn’t think it was a lesson he would be able to act on anytime soon. Leon had already decided that they would hole up until the snow stopped, and then go back to right where they started. And as always, Leon made a compelling case for his way of thinking, but Kenneth was no longer entirely convinced he was right. “But have you ever been in a situation where a foolish action seems like the only reasonable choice to make?” Amy pondered his question with a tiny line between her brows. Her fingers fidgeted with the bandages, so much so that Kenneth wondered how aware she was of the contact with Leon. When she finally answered, the sound of her voice almost startled him. “I wish I could say no, because I like to think I’m a 24

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sensible person.” She lifted her clear eyes to regard him steadily. “But yes. When I was younger.” The corner of her mouth lifted. “Probably when I was as young as you.” Kenneth hadn’t expected that. “How young do you think I am?” “Twenty, maybe.” “You’re good. I’ll be twenty-one in the spring. I like to think that I’m a sensible person, too, but sometimes I find myself in completely unsensible situations.” “That has a way of happening. But…” Her eyes ducked again, her hands shifting to test the water. Her fingers made small swirls in the surface. “From what I’ve seen, I think you’re going to be just fine. Some men wouldn’t have gone against their friend’s wishes like you did. That shows you’ve got your head on straight, even when the rest of the world is cockeyed.” He didn’t know why, but the praise coming from her made him feel flushed. It wasn’t just sitting so close to the fire—it was her. He didn’t deserve it at all, but he wanted Amy Northe to like him, and perhaps even respect him. He had respected her from the moment he met her eyes, and liked her as soon as she took charge and began tending to Leon’s foot. “Thank you.” As soon as he heard the level of gratitude in his own voice, he felt sheepish. It had been a simple compliment, not some life-changing moment. “Leon has his head on straight, too. I think the pain was just making him a bit…loopy. Is it time to change the bandages?” “It can’t hurt. But we’re going to have to warm more water 25

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after this. This is getting too tepid.” Amy took charge this time, unwinding the strips of cloth to soak them again before wrapping them back around. More tendrils had fallen free from their loose knot, and he had to fight the urge to reach out and push them off her face. Her cheek would be soft. Hot from the fire. If this had been a saloon or whorehouse, she would take his touch as an invitation, a request for more. Except it wasn’t. Amy Northe was a good woman. And he’d been apart from proper society too long if he was entertaining such thoughts about her. “I’m going to get you a blanket,” she said when she was done. “You might as well get some rest before we splint him. No reason for both of us to stay up.” Kenneth hesitated. They never slept at the same time. Ever. One of them always took lookout while the other rested, and for the past week, the one on lookout was Kenneth. But he was so tired that he was scared he would fall asleep sitting up, and then pitch backward into the fire. He told himself that even if Amy was the type to let something happen to one of her patients, nobody would come looking for them during this sort of blizzard. They were safe. For that one night, they could both sleep. “Thanks. I know I’ve been saying that a lot tonight, but I feel like you deserve to hear it a lot.” Amy rose to her feet. He thought he caught a glimmer of a smile before she turned away, but without chasing her down, there was no way to be sure. 26

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“You can make it up to me by bringing in two pots of snow. It’ll save me a trip in the cold when the first bowl is gone.” Kenneth pushed himself to his feet immediately and grabbed two of the pots they had been using to melt the snow. The wind sliced into his skin as soon as he opened the door, and he sent up a quick prayer of thanks that they weren’t huddled together in the barn. Maybe Woody really was their guardian angel. It comforted him a little to think that—to believe that God hadn’t given up on his soul completely.

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CHAPTER 3 Kenneth didn’t care that Leon was surly and grouchy—as long as he was awake, coherent, and his foot resembled an actual human foot once again. Leon had drifted in and out of consciousness for most of the day. Kenneth kept a vigil at his side, except when Amy asked for his help. The storm continued to rage outside, the snow drifting higher and higher against the cabin walls, until Kenneth feared they would be trapped in the small building forever. Amy and Woody, however, seemed unperturbed, and Amy spent a good portion of the morning sitting at the kitchen table with her son, going over his schoolbook, and the rest of the afternoon cooking and sewing. 28

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Amy made biscuits to eat with the leftover stew, and by the time she served dinner, Leon was awake and sitting up, his gaze moving around the cabin with curiosity and obvious impatience. When Kenneth got the chance, he moved as close to Leon as he could and tried to fill him in. “She thinks we rode in from Fort Bridger, you injured your foot when a snake spooked your horse, and we lost our coats in a poker game,” Kenneth said softly. Leon cursed under his breath. “Damn it, I hate it when I have to cover your lies. You always forget something.” “I know. I’m sorry. I tried to keep things simple, though. I didn’t add any extra details to get confused later.” “Where’s our guns?” “I hid them in the barn. I didn’t have time to do much else with Woody there.” “You’ll have to figure out how to get one inside. In case Mrs. Northe catches us out.” Kenneth spoke without thinking. “I’m not going to point a gun at her.” Leon’s dark brows drew together into a thick, bushy line. He was only two years older than Kenneth, but he acted like it was more. Hell, he looked like it was more, especially when he got annoyed or angry. “She’s going to have to leave this house at some point,” he whispered, furtively glancing at where she and Woody were washing up from dinner. “What do you think is going to happen when she finds out you’ve been lying to her all along?” 29

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“I don’t know,” Kenneth said, honestly. Miserably. The more time he spent with Amy, the more he wished lies weren’t necessary at all. “But it doesn’t have to come down to a shootout. She does have a gun—the one her husband used in the War—but it’s not loaded.” “I’m not saying we’re going to shoot her. I just want some sway when we tell her to keep her mouth shut.” Kenneth didn’t even want to threaten Amy. The thought of terrorizing her after she had been so kind to them was more than abhorrent. But Leon probably wouldn’t understand— especially since he was technically right. “I can’t get out to the barn right now, anyway. I’ll think of a way to get it when there’s not five feet of snow outside.” “Yeah.” Leon nodded in agreement. “That snow’s turning into our best friend. If we can’t get out, neither can she.” He turned his gaze to Amy’s back, his thin mouth curving into a salacious smile. “And she does make nice company, I’ll give you that much.” It didn’t surprise Kenneth that Leon would take an interest in Amy. Leon could be very unfriendly, to the point that many people found him to be rude and obnoxious, but he had another side. A side which often took an active interest in women and men. And it wasn’t just an itch that needed to be scratched, or he would have been more than happy just spending time and money on whores. Besides, Kenneth wasn’t blind. She did make nice company, and he had stolen more than one glance at her during the day. Still, Leon’s comment struck him as annoying, even inappropriate. 30

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“Just remember she’s a nice lady who probably saved your life.” Leon’s smile only widened. “Oh, but it’s the ladies who’ll always surprise you, Kenny boy. Because you expect ’em to act one way, and then they invite you out into the barn for a few hours away from the prim and proper.” “You can tell me more of your theory after she goes to bed and she isn’t just a few feet away, okay?” Leon chuckled, but the laughter cut off with a grunt of pain when he attempted to shift on his pallet. Amy’s head whipped around at the sound, her knowing eyes searching for any signs of his discomfort. “You need to be still,” she chastised. “It’s too soon to be jostling that ankle around so much.” Leon looked suitably scolded. “Yes, ma’am.” Her gaze went to Kenneth. “I’m going to warm water for some laundry. Can you help get the worst of his clothes off so I can wash them? Yours, too. That way, they can dry overnight, and you won’t miss them too much because you’ll be bundled under the blankets.” The same strange sense of modesty he felt the night before came over him again, but Leon was already unbuttoning his shirt. He would have looked ridiculous arguing that they couldn’t get undressed in front of her. Besides, she had been married. She had a child. She wasn’t going to see anything she hadn’t already seen before. He pushed himself into a kneeling position and reached for his belt, keeping his eyes averted. It was only as he unbuttoned 31

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his pants that Kenneth realized she didn’t plan to send them out to the barn. Woody gathered their clothes for them, carrying them dutifully over to his mother. She draped them over her arm without closer inspection and disappeared into the back larder. To fetch soap, Kenneth presumed. He spent a moment debating whether or not he should help, barely noticing when Woody edged to Leon’s side again. “What’s that?” He was fixated on a hole in Leon’s longjohns. It exposed a ragged scar on his shoulder. One Kenneth wished he hadn’t noticed. “Back off, kid.” Leon swatted the hand that wasn’t that close to him anyway. “Didn’t your ma teach you it isn’t polite to stare?” Woody turned hurt eyes to Kenneth for a split second before retreating. “I was just wondering what happened to you.” “A bad man hurt him once,” Kenneth said, pushing himself to his feet so he could guide Woody away from Leon. Leon wasn’t a bad guy, but he mostly didn’t like kids. He especially didn’t like kids when he was in pain. “A long time ago. And he’s still kind of grumpy about it.” Woody clamped his mouth shut when Amy re-entered. She took one look at him and waved him toward the chest. “Get ready for bed, young man. I’m going to wash your clothes, too.” “Yes, ma’am.” “Do you have any large buckets?” Kenneth asked, pulling 32

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his boots back on. “I’ll probably need to collect a lot of snow for this.” “There’s a big basin next to the woodpile. If you can bring that in, that’s what I’ll use.” “Yes, ma’am.” He gritted his teeth and pushed the door open, bracing himself for the stinging cold. The wind wasn’t blowing quite so hard this evening, and the snow had been downgraded from a blizzard to a mere flurry, but it was still almost too cold to tolerate. He packed the basin, piling it high with the dense snow. When he stepped inside the house, Woody wasn’t in his small bed, but he was nowhere else to be seen. Amy bustled forward to help him carry it to the far edge of the fireplace. “I’ve put Woody to bed in my room,” she explained. “That’ll give you two some privacy out here, and I won’t worry about waking him up while I’m doing the laundry.” Kenneth nodded. That was just as well. He didn’t mind Woody, but it wouldn’t be long before the kid wore down Leon’s already frayed nerves. “The snow seems to be slowing down. I wouldn’t be surprised if the sky is clear tomorrow morning.” “I’ll just be glad when the wind stops.” Amy straightened and pushed back a strand of hair that had slipped against her cheek. “It makes me nervous.” “No reason to be nervous,” Leon chimed in from behind Kenneth. “You think we’d let anything happen to you after everything you’ve done for us?” 33

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“I don’t think she needs us to protect her,” Kenneth said, flashing a shy smile before turning back to Leon. “How’s your foot. I could get some more snow, if you’d like something cold for it.” Leon scowled at being cut off, but settled back on his pallet. “Foot’s fine. Just bored.” “Bored is better than where you were yesterday this time,” Amy said. Kenneth smiled. In spite of his worries about their lies, everything was better than where they’d been twenty-four hours earlier. *

*

*

Though it rattled less, the wind still whistled outside the cabin walls, no respite from the storm even with Kenneth’s prediction. Amy stared blindly up at the ceiling, wondering why she couldn’t fall asleep. She was certainly tired enough. She’d hardly slept the night before, and the day had been long and hard with their unexpected guests. It wasn’t that she was unused to Woody sharing her bed, either. He often did when he was feeling unwell, or had a nightmare, or simply when Amy craved a little company. No, she strongly suspected that the source of her unrest resided on the other side of the curtain blocking her tiny bedroom from the main room of the house. She had bid Kenneth and Leon good night nearly an hour ago. Though they had given her no troubles, they occupied more of her thoughts than was probably proper. She expected Leon’s 34

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irritability. He was in pain, and she didn’t have any whisky or brandy to blunt his aches. But Kenneth’s shy smile lingered when it shouldn’t. His good manners and polite ways reminded her of lighter times, when she hadn’t been only barely tolerated by a town that would have preferred a nice Mormon nurse instead. He treated her like a woman of value. He treated her like a lady. Beside her, Woody shivered and burrowed deeper into the blankets. Amy rolled onto her side and frowned when she saw the faint plume of his breath. It was too chilly in here for him. He was accustomed to sleeping in the warmer outer room. There was one last blanket, old and worn, in the chest. Maybe she could get one of the men to trade one of theirs for it so Woody could bundle a little tighter. Kenneth. Kenneth would trade. Her decision made, Amy rose from the bed, moving silently so as not to wake Woody. She slid her feet into her slippers and groped for her dressing gown. It was half on, half off when a sound at the curtain made her freeze in her paces. A soft groan. Not a groan of pain. Not a groan of discomfort, or the muffled sound of an uneasy sleep. This was the sound of pure relief that bordered on pleasure. It was a sound she hadn’t heard in years—not since before her husband died. She couldn’t decide who was the source, but she realized it didn’t matter when she heard a second, echoing groan. A little deeper. Obviously from a different throat. “Okay, Leon. You were right.” A sigh. “That does feel good.” 35

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Amy knew she should go back to her bed. She should get far, far away from the evidence she couldn’t ignore that there were two men in her house. Two young men. Two young, virile men. Another groan. Two men who clearly thought she was fast asleep. She hugged her arms around her body, her flesh suddenly flushed with heat. “A little bit faster,” Kenneth encouraged with a soft grunt. She could imagine them clinging together in the dark, groping at each other. It was disgraceful, and she knew she should have been disgusted and horrified and disapproving. But ultimately, the image just reminded her that she didn’t have anybody to cling to. “Have I ever steered you wrong?” Leon’s voice was breathier than she’d heard from him before. “I think you’re just distracted, is all.” Distracted? By what? A floorboard creaked. What were they doing out there? Leon couldn’t satisfy Kenneth’s request for faster, not in his condition, not in the dark way she’d originally imagined. Hands, then. Strong hands. Touching and stroking. Her fingers trailed over her stomach. The muscles quivered. “Of course I’m distracted. You almost lost your foot. We almost died out there.” “Oh, I didn’t mean that, Kenny boy.” The groan that came 36

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this time was different, not Kenneth’s. “You’re rougher than usual. I think that proves my point.” Kenneth didn’t respond immediately, but she heard the unmistakable sound of lips against flesh. What would it be like to kiss Kenneth? She suspected he’d be careful about it. “I don’t even know what your point is.” “Oh? So you’re not thinking of her now? Tell me you’re not, and I’ll know you’re lying.” Her. Amy’s first thought was that Kenneth had left behind a sweetheart somewhere, but no, he’d said they’d been traveling, he’d said there wasn’t anyone, he’d said… Her. She squeezed her thighs together against the fresh warmth rushing through her. Licking her suddenly dry lips, Amy leaned against the wall and dipped her hand lower, over her mound. “Of course you’ll know. I’m an awful liar…” A long pause, and Amy held her breath, waiting for a more concrete confirmation. “I can’t stop thinking about her. She’s…the most beautiful thing…” She had to bite her lower lip to keep from making a sound. Nobody had called her beautiful in so many years, not since Ernest, and especially never by a young, handsome man like Kenneth. “I saw you. Watching her when she was doing the laundry.” Silence. Amy leaned closer to the crack of the curtain, straining to hear. Not silence. Breathing. Both of them. 37

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Heavily. “She leaned forward…” Leon grunted, cleared his throat. “The water splashed so you could see her nipples if you were looking. You were looking, weren’t you, Kenny boy?” “I was looking. At her whole body. Her shoulders, and her bottom, and her legs. I don’t want to talk about her…” “Why not?” “Because…it’ll never be anything except talk.” Amy glanced down. She couldn’t help it. She hadn’t even realized she’d somehow drawn their attention to her. They had seemed preoccupied with each other, talking in low voices about matters she hadn’t heard. To know they had been watching her, drinking her in, imagining her without her dress…it should have shamed her. She was a decent woman. She hadn’t been with any man since Ernest’s death. It didn’t. It made her wonder even more what it would be like to be with Kenneth. “You think so?” Leon chuckled. “You could have her eating out of the palm of your hand if you wanted. But maybe that’s not what you want, after all.” Kenneth moaned, but Amy didn’t think it had anything to do with what Leon said. Whatever Leon was doing to him, it was clearly having a very powerful effect on him. The floorboards creaked again, and there was a different edge in Kenneth’s voice as he spoke again. “Why? Because I’ve already got you…?” He sucked his breath in sharply. “I couldn’t have her eating out of my hand. I’m not…God, I want her, though.” 38

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Amy pressed her hand between her thighs, slowly rubbing the fabric of her nightdress along her folds. She should make them leave tomorrow. How was she going to look Kenneth in the eye again? She would blush, she was sure of it. “I know,” Leon coaxed. “I know. Just pretend she’s the one squeezing you right now. Close your eyes. Can you see her lying there? See her all pink and soft and waiting for you to bury your prick in her?” “Oh, yes. Yes. I can see her. Smell her.” The words sounded more like moans than actual words, and Kenneth’s breath quickened. So did her fingers as she continued massaging her flesh, trying to relieve the rising pressure beneath her skin. But no matter what she did, no matter how much she squirmed against her own hand, she couldn’t get the relief she sought. And it only worsened when Kenneth spoke again. “Don’t stop…please. Don’t.” “I won’t.” She had to strain to hear Leon’s whispers. “We take care of each other. That’s what we’ve always done. I’m not going to stop now.” “I know. I know you’re not. Don’t…don’t get busted up and scare me like that again.” “Never.” Amy fought to listen, but there were no more words. There wasn’t even breathing. She heard grunts and the mistakable sounds of kissing and then nothing at all, not even the thunder of her own heart. She bit her cheek. Harder. The coppery taste of blood tinged her tongue. When it came, it was so muffled, she thought she’d heard 39

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it wrong. But it lasted, a long, low, keening moan, for seconds upon seconds. She dared to peek around the curtain, but all she saw were two bodies, stretched in front of the fire, Kenneth’s torso arched back into shadows, a look of satisfaction on Leon’s face. Kenneth took a single, shuddering gasp, and then pressed his mouth to Leon’s. Leon trembled beneath the blanket for several seconds, and then they parted and seemed to melt against the floor, both of them looking satisfied. “Do you think…you don’t think she knows what I think of her, do you?” Amy held her breath. Everything in her quivered. Waited. “I’ll bet your secret’s safe.” Leon flopped an arm over and awkwardly patted Kenneth’s hip. “She probably just thinks of you as a kid anyway.” She didn’t. Not now. She was all too aware of what Kenneth looked like, kissing someone at the height of passion. That wasn’t a kid. That was a full-grown man, with fully fledged desires. “Speaking of which, don’t call me ‘Kenny boy.’ You know how much I hate that.” Leon smiled. “Sure thing, Kenny boy.” Amy retreated before she heard Kenneth’s response. She couldn’t go out there now. She’d just cuddle with Woody to give him the extra warmth. She crawled back beneath the blankets wondering if Kenneth would seek Leon out for heat. Or more heat, rather. But when she closed her eyes, it was her bed Kenneth came to. 40

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CHAPTER 4 The sky wasn’t clear by the morning, but it did stop snowing around lunch. All four of the cabin’s occupants watched the world through the window, staring at the blue sky and the pristine mountains of snow with longing. Woody was practically climbing the walls, and Leon was getting more grouchy, despite the fact he couldn’t go outside regardless the weather. Kenneth was the only one who felt a vague stab of disappointment. He liked their forced proximity—had even enjoyed it quite a bit. He liked knowing Leon was safe, and he liked playing little games with Woody, and he liked being close enough to watch, and occasionally touch, Amy. But he 41

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didn’t allow his disappointment to show, and he was quick to volunteer to help when Amy announced her intention to check on the animals and milk the cow. Leon looked at him with approval, but Kenneth wasn’t interested in the gun. He was interested in spending a few quiet moments with Amy. He left the house first, using her shovel to break through the snow. There was at least four feet, and his back and legs burned from the excursion before they were even halfway across the yard. She kept close behind him, and knowing she was there, knowing she was counting on him to break a trail, kept him moving. The cold stung his face and his lungs, and the icy air burned his throat in a completely different way. The sun was high above their heads, but the heat didn’t touch them at all, and the sky was a washed-out shade of blue. There wasn’t any color in the world at all, except the red blush on Amy’s cheeks, and the blue of her eyes, and the richness of her black hair. When they reached the barn, all three horses greeted them by neighing and stomping their feet. The cow expressed her discomfort with a long, low bawl, and Kenneth could see her udder was distended, waiting to be milked. “At least they all made it through the storm,” Kenneth commented, crossing over to pet his horse’s muzzle. “Rocky’s been through worse.” Amy was quick to brush past him to head straight for the cow, running her hand down its flank as she bent in to whisper in its ear. “Hazel here is the one I was most worried about. We almost lost her last year. 42

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She’s never been quite as strong since.” “These the only animals you have? No chickens or anything?” “Not anymore.” She rounded Hazel’s rump to pluck a stool off a hook on the wall, but rather than stay on the opposite side, she returned to where she’d first stood. When she sat down, her back faced Kenneth. “We had a pig a while back, but when it went to slaughter, I just didn’t have the means to get another one. And our chicken coop got torn apart by coyotes last year. Now I just make trades with Mrs. Thurman for eggs.” Kenneth figured that was how she got most of her food— bartering whatever she could. He didn’t know where the chicken coop was, but he wouldn’t be surprised to learn that the coop had never been repaired either. “Do you just trade for food? Do you hunt or trap any game?” Amy shook her head. “Ernest used to, though he wasn’t very good at it. But trading works out for us, most of the time. And Woody’s starting to get to the age where he’s insisting on learning.” Her sigh created soft wisps around her head as she leaned in to start milking. “I just have to find a man around town I trust enough to teach him.” Kenneth looked away from her to focus on his saddlebags. His first impulse had been to offer to help. He knew how to shoot, and his father had taught him how to lay traps for rabbits, but it would be ridiculous to offer. They weren’t staying for longer than they had to. But even if he couldn’t 43

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teach Woody, he could still make their lives a bit easier. “Did your husband have any snowshoes?” “Somewhere out here…” The import of what he was leading to made her pause, and for the first time since coming out to the barn, she turned to look directly at him. “You’d do that for us?” Kenneth couldn’t hold her gaze for very long. “I think it’s the least I could do, after everything you’ve done for us.” Amy remained motionless for several seconds, but Kenneth refused to yield to the urge to look at her again. Something about her mood this afternoon had his head awhirl. Or maybe it was just seeing her by the light of day, in the aftermath of all the images Leon had planted in his head. Either way, it was easier to think about the supplies in his saddlebags than it was to meet her dark blue eyes. “I’d be grateful for anything you could bring in,” she said softly. “Thank you.” Kenneth knew hunting wouldn’t exactly be an easy task, especially if he had to wander very far to find a deer or an elk. But her simple expression of gratitude was enough to push any concerns out of his head. He’d bring something back for her even if it took all day and night. “I’m happy to help. Besides, there’s nothing better to get through a harsh winter storm than a thick, venison stew.” “And fresh biscuits.” Her smile was brilliant as she turned back to her milking. “I’ve got elderberry preserves from this past fall we can spread on them for dessert.” “Sounds delicious.” 44

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Now that her back was to him again, he began digging through the closest pile of hay. He had been holding both guns when Woody had discovered them in the barn, and he had reacted without thinking, hiding both weapons in the most convenient location. The hay scratched his bare, cold hands, making him wish he had a pair of gloves. He could live without a coat if he had some gloves. Maybe she still had a coat or some clothes of her husband’s he could borrow to go hunting. He found the guns without too much trouble, but hesitated when he saw them. Kenneth still didn’t want to bring them into the house. It just struck him as too dangerous. What if Woody found them? What if Leon felt it necessary to threaten Amy? “How bad is the chicken coop? Could you repair the damage the coyotes did?” “I couldn’t, no. I tried once, but the chickens got out so I gave up.” She set aside the bucket of milk she’d just filled and reached for a second. Several seconds elapsed where the only sound was the splat of fluid against the polished wood as she resumed her milking. “Maybe that might be something else you could do for me. The winter looks to be a bad one, and Leon shouldn’t be out on his ankle anyway. If you two decided to stick it out here in Yellow Rock, I’d be willing to set up some sort of trade. You sleep out here in the barn, I feed you, and you do some odd jobs for me.” Kenneth swallowed. He would stay. He wouldn’t even have to think twice about the offer. He could help get them 45

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through the winter, and then repair the coop and help her stock it with pullets. He could show Woody how to trap for rabbits. He could even offer his own services around the community, bartering his skills to help her get the supplies and food she needed. It would be good to have something like a home again, even if that home was just a barn and a bed of straw. But Leon would not be so willing to tie himself down to any one spot. And there was the fact that it was just too dangerous to settle down. They’d be sitting ducks, just waiting for somebody to recognize them. “I agree that Leon shouldn’t be on his ankle. I’ll talk to him about it tonight.” He expected her to continue on trying to persuade him. She was nothing if not persistent. But when the silence stretched, and all he heard was the spray of milk filling the bucket, he glanced over to see if she was all right. Pink stained her cheeks. Her head was lowered, intent on her task, but her breathing seemed quicker than it should be, her color too high. Nothing had interrupted her milking. In fact, her tight pulls on the udder seemed unnecessarily forceful, certainly stronger than he would have expected from her. “For what it’s worth…” Her voice was husky, almost breathless. “Woody would like it if you stuck around. He doesn’t have enough of a male figure to look up to. I think he really likes you.” “I really like him. He’s a good kid.” 46

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Kenneth wished he could explain everything to her. He wished he could tell her that he’d really love to stay, and that he was honored she’d even ask them to stick around. He wanted to tell her that he’d do anything to help her. She had purely pragmatic reasons for extending the offer, and it didn’t mean she wanted anything from him besides his strength and ability to help them all survive, but he still wanted to stay. “If it were just up to me…I’d stay.” Her shoulders sagged slightly. “Oh. Right. Leon.” She chewed her lower lip, her hands slowing then stopping their task. “Do you think it would help if I talked to him? Maybe I can convince him you need to stay.” “I don’t know. I don’t think Leon’s stayed in one place for more than a few weeks in his whole life. I’ll talk to him. He’s in a lot of pain. He might just agree with me to get me to shut up.” Amy nodded, and turned to face him more though she didn’t rise from her stool. “How long have you two been traveling together? You act like you’ve known each other your whole lives.” “A little over five years, actually. Though sometimes it feels like my whole life.” “You rely on each other.” She nodded, as if it answered some other question for her. “Those kind of relationships are hard to find.” “And they’re often born out of necessity. I needed him, at first, more than he needed me.” “Why?” 47

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“My father had died when I was really young, and I was raised by my mother and grandmother. They both died of scarlet fever when I was fifteen, and I was…very lonely. That’s when he found me, I guess. When I met Leon, I sort of latched onto him.” Her eyes softened. So did her mouth. Hesitantly, she stood and stepped forward, each additional pace revealing more and sharper details. Like how her fingers fidgeted in front of her. Or the way the flush in her face disappeared beneath her collar. The sudden question of whether she would be pink all over made him grip the strap of his saddlebag even tighter. She stopped with only a foot between them. “I think that’s even more reason to stick it out here in Yellow Rock. Surely Leon can see that it’s good for you to be around folks who want you there?” Leon would most likely think that he was the only one Kenneth really needed. He wouldn’t be hurt if Kenneth suggested otherwise, but he’d probably be confused and surprised. But none of that mattered. This was a moot point. They couldn’t stay, and chances were that before too long, Amy would want them to leave. “I think if I put it to him like that, he might see it your way. But don’t you think you’ll get tired of having us around, under foot and eating your food?” “No.” The speed at which she answered surprised both of them, but rather than retreat, Amy took a bold step closer. “It’s been nice having you around. And not…not just for what you’ve done for me.” 48

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Kenneth mirrored her step. She was in touching distance— kissing distance. “I could say the same thing. I’m really glad that I’ve met you.” Her lashes dipped. He wasn’t sure what exactly she was looking at. His mouth, maybe. Or his chest. “Because you’re still lonely?” “No. Well, yes. Maybe a little. But also because you’re…” Kenneth knew if he touched her, he would probably scare her away. He wished he had a better sense of self-control, but he couldn’t stop himself from skimming his fingers over the bare skin of her neck—the patch that wasn’t covered by her coat or her hood. “You’re a remarkable woman, Amy Northe.” The fragile hollow fluttered, but she didn’t withdraw. She tilted her head the fraction necessary to strengthen the contact between them, and lifted her gaze back up to his. “I haven’t been with anyone since Ernest died. I haven’t wanted to. But you…” She swallowed. “You make me want to.” Kenneth forgot about the cold air, the drifts of snow outside, the animals in the barn. He even forgot about Leon and Woody. Everything that wasn’t Amy suddenly didn’t matter. He caressed her chin with his thumb, marveling because she didn’t pull away from him, and her skin was so strangely warm. “I want to be with you, too.” He felt a brief sizzle of shame as he remembered the previous night, Leon’s hand wrapped around his prick so tight it was almost painful while he was lost in fantasies of her. 49

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“I know I shouldn’t.” Her breath was even hotter than her flesh, washing over the heel of his hand and up his arm until it prickled along his chest. “I know I’m too old for you. You’re young, you should have someone closer to your own age, and you and Leon probably won’t stay anyway, but…” She edged forward until their bodies pressed lightly together. Kenneth hated that her heavy coat kept him from feeling her plush curves better. “That doesn’t change how I feel.” He would never believe that she was too old for him. Kenneth hadn’t spared a second thought to her probable age, or that he had been Woody’s age when Woody was born. All that mattered was what Amy felt—what they both felt. He wrapped his arm around Amy’s body, holding her even closer. Kenneth tilted his head, his lips just skimming over her brow. When he took a deep breath, he smelled her stew and dumplings, her soap, her fire, her sweat—a scent that was already beginning to make him think of home. “It doesn’t matter that you’re older than me. I’m not a boy. I’ll stay as long as I can. I promise you that much.” She moved against his arm with a graceful strength, knowing and assured, like she’d taken control that first night. Her mouth lifted, lips parting, and the tip of her tongue darted out to moisten them in a motion so delicate it made him ache. But there wasn’t time to savor how they glistened, or wonder why it was she’d come to him. She stretched upward, brushing her mouth over his. It almost tickled. It most definitely teased. Amy kept it gentle until a shiver rippled through her. Then she firmed the contact, finally offering the kisses he’d wanted to 50

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claim for hours now. His kissing experience was limited. There were a handful of saloon girls, and Leon, and that was it. He didn’t know if he was good or bad at it. He didn’t know if he could give her exactly what she wanted. But those concerns were fleeting, because she wasn’t pulling out of his embrace, or pushing him away from her. Kenneth deepened the caress, intent on learning as much of her mouth as he could. His arm tightened around her, and even though he knew they couldn’t spend the entire day kissing in the cold barn, he didn’t want to let her go. She made a sound in the back of her throat that made his ears burn. It felt like a moan. Or a whimper. Something carnal, laced with need and the silent plea for more. When she coiled her arms around his neck, Kenneth finally abandoned the touch of her cheek to skim his hand down her side, coming to a rest on her hip. Amy broke away for a moment, panting heavily. Her pupils had nearly swallowed the blue irises, but they couldn’t mask the gleam that shone up at him. “No, you’re most definitely not a boy. I’ve never been kissed like that before.” “I don’t think I’ve ever kissed anybody like that before,” Kenneth admitted, never feeling less like a boy in his life. Maybe it was the way she looked at him. He pushed her back to the wall, trapping her between it and his body. Their mouths met again, and he pushed his hand beneath her coat, seeking out the curve of her hip. The coarse fabric of her skirt got in his way. He didn’t 51

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want to feel it scratch against his palm. He wanted to feel her, to know if her skin was as soft everywhere as what he’d felt on her cheek. He wanted the heat, and the sensation of sinking into her. He wanted more, more than just the hungry sweep of her tongue over his. He got it when she fumbled blindly with the fastenings on her coat, opening it in order to grind more closely against him. His prick was already semi-erect, but as soon as she shifted against his body, he became fully hard. Kenneth knew it was probably too cold to try to remove any of her other layers, so he settled for smoothing his hand up her ribs, and allowing his knuckles to brush against the swell of her breast. Her heat soaked through the cool material, driving him to hold her closer, pull her tighter. Each time they paused for breath, he worried she would choose that moment to break the contact completely. But then their lips would meet again, and that fear would be temporarily banished. Amy groaned when his teeth caught her lower lip. It had been an accident, a slide of his mouth that hadn’t gone exactly as he’d planned, but it bolstered Kenneth’s courage, urging him to take more risks. He turned his wrist, allowing the swell of her breast to rest in his palm, and ran his thumb over the peak of her nipple, hard even through her dress. This time, Amy gasped. “I…I wish…” She gulped for air. “You’re staying, you said. You promised.” Even though he wanted nothing more in that moment than to vow to stay as long as she wanted him, his better sense 52

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prevailed. “As long as I possibly can. That’s what I promised.” Something shuttered in her eyes. “Right. That’s what I meant.” Kenneth kissed the corner of her mouth. “What do you wish?” Amy shivered at the caress. “Oh, just that we didn’t have to go back inside.” Her hand flattened against his chest, and though she didn’t push him away, it still managed to create an effective barrier between them. “But we do.” Kenneth nodded and released her. As soon as he stepped back and lost the connection to her warmth, the cold air struck him with enough force to steal his breath. He had the feeling he had said the wrong thing when he reminded her he couldn’t stay with her. “I can feed and water the horses if you want to go in where it’s warmer.” Her gaze darted to the doorway. For a second, he really thought she was going to run away. “Were you serious about maybe trying some hunting or trapping for us?” she asked instead. “Yes. I could try a bit today before it gets too late in the afternoon.” “Then I’ll look for the snowshoes. And whatever else might come in handy.” Amy turned away from the entrance and walked over to a ladder leading up to a half-loft. She paused on the bottom rung. Her eyes blazed when she looked back at Kenneth. “I hope you can convince Leon to stay. I really do.” 53

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Kenneth’s mouth went dry, and for a moment, he was hopeful that he hadn’t somehow ruined things. Even though he knew it was an impossibility, he heard himself saying, “I’m going to do my best.” She nodded and turned back to the ladder. He couldn’t stop watching her until she made it to the top, but even when he turned away, he could still see her perfectly.

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CHAPTER 5 Kissing Kenneth once only made Amy want to kiss Kenneth more. She shouldn’t have kissed him at all. She knew that. She might not be as self-righteous as so many of the other women in town, but she wasn’t so fallen not to know some things were better left to the imagination. Everything she’d overheard between her two guests should have stayed firmly between them. She shouldn’t have succumbed to her desires—for company, for the sound of his voice, for the press of his lips to hers. But she had. And she couldn’t stop. The weather improved with each passing day. Saturday 55

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was crisp and clear, and when she ventured out to milk Hazel, Kenneth immediately volunteered to come help. Amy didn’t tell him no. That was the last thing she wanted. As soon as they stepped into the barn’s sanctuary, she reached out to touch his shoulder. She just craved the contact, she told herself. A slight caress to let him know he was friend not foe. Kenneth took one look at her, and she was lost. She sank into his embrace, seeking out his hot mouth, as if they hadn’t yielded to their urges the day before. It happened again on Sunday. Kisses that left her lips numb. His strong hands stroking over her body until she yearned to shed the clothes that separated them and feel those rough calluses directly on her sensitive skin. They only stopped because Rocky’s soft whinny alerted them to Woody’s approach. Amy knew then that she wouldn’t be able to keep this up when it was possible to be interrupted. Not if she didn’t want to have to explain to Woody what exactly was going on. Not that she really had any clue what was going on. When Monday dawned, the crystal blue skies overhead left no question about Woody missing another day of school. Amy bustled getting breakfast ready, humming under her breath while Kenneth helped Woody gather his slate and books. “Are you excited about going back to school this morning?” Kenneth asked. “Yes. I like when we work with numbers.” “Ahh. I was never very good with my arithmetic.” “I could show you how to do sums. It’s really easy.” 56

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Amy smiled at her son’s offer. He was always eager to demonstrate what he learned in Yellow Rock’s small school, and if Kenneth wasn’t careful, he’d spend hours learning Woody’s lessons. “Well, that’s right kind of you. Do you know your multiplication tables?” “What’s that?” “Probably something you’ll learn soon enough.” Kenneth dropped down to one knee, so his eyes were level with Woody’s. “I need to talk to you about something before you go to school.” Amy looked up from the salt pork she was frying, surprised by the sudden shift in Kenneth’s tone. He sounded very serious. “What?” “Were you planning to tell your classmates about me and Leon?” Woody frowned, apparently perplexed by the question. “Yes. But just Davey. He’s my friend.” “I think for now, me and Leon being here should just be our secret. Some people won’t like the fact that your mom is taking care of us while Leon is sick. They might say things about her—things that’ll hurt her feelings. So it’s best if they don’t know. Not even Davey.” Woody glanced across the room at Amy. She couldn’t speak, though she knew she should. But her throat was too tight with the knowledge of what Kenneth was doing for her. After a moment, Woody made up his mind and nodded. 57

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“Yes, sir.” Before Amy turned back to the stove, she caught Kenneth’s eye. Smiling at him was inevitable. Even Leon seemed in a much better mood as they ate breakfast. Amy credited it with the fact that he wasn’t still stuck on the floor. On Sunday afternoon, Kenneth had moved him to sit in the chair, and though he grumbled a lot about being stuck in one place, the shift in perspective had done wonders for making him friendlier. For the first time, she began to see what Kenneth saw in him. Amy sent Woody off with a smile and a warning to be careful. He waved goodbye from the path leading to the main road, and when she shut the door behind her, she couldn’t help but meet Kenneth’s eye for a brief but telling second. “I’m going out to milk Hazel. You want to come and take care of the horses while I do that?” “Yes,” Kenneth said, quickly jumping up from his chair. “I’d love to take care of the horses. Leon, I’ll be right back.” Leon snorted. “The kid’s not here. You two don’t have to sneak around.” Amy froze in mid-reach for her coat. She didn’t dare risk another glance at Kenneth. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” “Oh, yes, you do. You don’t think I can’t tell what you and Kenny boy have been up to? He rolls into bed smelling like you, Mrs. Northe.” Kenneth’s gaze darted back and forth, and for a moment, he looked as embarrassed as Amy felt. “I never mentioned…I 58

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never told him anything.” “You didn’t have to.” Leon rolled his eyes. “Christ, you two haven’t exactly been subtle about it. Every time you look at her, I feel like I have to knock you upside the head to get you to stop staring.” Kenneth opened his mouth, but he seemed a little confused, like he didn’t quite know how to respond to that. There wasn’t a defense. Amy had felt him staring more than once, and when she could get the chance, she took a turn staring at him. Trying to think of an excuse—any excuse—to get him out to the barn again. “What do you want us to do?” Kenneth finally asked. “Stay in here and let you watch?” “Why not?” Leon jerked his chin toward Amy. “It’s not like she hasn’t been watching us.” Her eyes went wide, and the fire in her cheeks spread. Suddenly, she knew Leon wasn’t referring to their first night there. She had spent the past two nights listening for a repeat performance, and Kenneth hadn’t let her down. As soon as she heard the whispering start, she crept to the curtain and peeped out. She didn’t see much more than she did the first time, but her imagination filled in the details, scraps of information she gleaned from kissing Kenneth in the barn. But she’d never guessed that Leon knew she was standing there. He’d never even hinted at it. Kenneth’s pale skin almost looked purple when he focused his attention on her. “You’ve been…you know we….you were watching us?” 59

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“I’m sorry,” she blurted. “I didn’t mean to—” “Maybe not the first time.” Leon winked at her, which did nothing to ease her embarrassment. “But the second and third, you sure did.” Kenneth took a step backward, like he intended to flee the cabin if things became more awkward between them. “Why did you…I mean, you don’t want us to leave now, do you?” Unexpected panic rushed through her. “No! No, I don’t want you to go at all. I just…” She couldn’t look at Leon. She didn’t like the knowing in his eyes. Abandoning her coat, she edged closer to Kenneth, taking her time so he wouldn’t run away. “I like you. Please don’t be mad at me.” Kenneth let Amy approach without trying to put more distance between them. “I’m not mad at you. But I thought you would be…disgusted with me.” “Why? Because…” Her voice trailed off as she realized what exactly he meant. “Oh…no, I’m not disgusted.” She risked a tentative hand on his forearm. The hard muscles beneath her fingers put her straight back in the barn, her body hot from the heat of his. “I know men have needs. And you told me yourself. You and Leon rely on each other.” The color went down on his cheeks, and he looked up from the floor to briefly meet her eyes. “It feels like my…needs have increased since I met you.” Behind them, Leon chuckled. “I’ll say. I don’t think I’ve ever seen Kenny boy so worked up over a woman before. Not that I can blame him.” Amy ignored the leer in his voice to focus instead on 60

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Kenneth and his bright, earnest eyes. “How about we say, I won’t be bothered by what I saw if you promise me you won’t be bothered that I couldn’t help watching you? Because I liked it. I really did.” Kenneth lost the wary frown and smiled. “That sounds fair to me.” He stepped closer and put a hand on her waist. “He’s right, though. Smug but right. Nobody’s ever made me feel anything like this before.” Her heart twisted. She knew it was just a matter of his age. He was young. He hadn’t had a chance to really experience life yet, especially hanging around with Leon. She suspected the other man protected Kenneth from a lot of things, in spite of his abrasive attitude. But it felt so good hearing the proclamation that she embraced it anyway. It had been such a long time since she’d felt like anything remotely feminine. Kenneth reminded her that there was more to life than mothering and nursing. “So maybe the milking can wait a little.” She felt breathless. She sounded even more so. Rising to her tiptoes, she pressed her mouth to the spot below his ear and whispered, “It would be nice to kiss you without our coats in the way.” “Yes, it would,” Kenneth murmured, hooking his finger under her chin to guide her lips to his. The caress was soft, but not hesitant. His lips were warm—much warmer than when they were in the barn—and it felt like almost nothing separated his chest from hers. His palms were flat against her back, pulling her against him, not even allowing light to 61

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separate their bodies. After a long moment, he teased the corner of her mouth with his tongue, seeking the access she was more than willing to grant him. Her lips parted, and his tongue brushed across hers. Kenneth groaned at the new demand of her tongue. That first day in the barn, he had been occasionally awkward, sometimes unsure of how best to kiss her. By the second, that awkwardness had fled. He pushed for more with a surety that made Amy quiver. She arched against him, ignoring the way her head spun, and relished the way he immediately tightened his hold. They were kisses meant to last for hours. Not the scant seconds Leon granted them before loudly clearing his throat. “When I said you didn’t have to sneak around, I didn’t mean you had to eat each other’s faces right in front of me.” The look on his face was pure annoyance when Amy glanced back, but there was a hungry glitter in his eye that made her heart skip a beat. “That doesn’t seem very fair, if you ask me.” “We could always go out to the barn and leave you in here by yourself,” Kenneth said, “if that seems more fair.” “Or you could let me have a little fun, too.” Amy’s eyes widened at his suggestion. It was on the tip of her tongue to laugh it off as another of his less than appropriate responses, but there wasn’t a hint in his tone that he was joking. Her heart picked up its rhythm again, faster, skittish. She had to swallow to get rid of the tightness of her throat. She had no idea what to do. Or say. Or even if she should. 62

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Kenneth stepped forward, putting himself between Amy and Leon. “How much fun do you think you could have stuck in that chair?” Leon didn’t look fazed. In fact, he smiled, and the twinkle in his eye was unlike anything Amy had ever seen before. “Oh, I’m sure we could figure something out.” He cocked his head, looking past Kenneth to Amy. “I’m not so bad really. And you saw me and Kenny boy. I took care of him, didn’t I? I could do the same for you, darlin’.” Amy shivered. It wasn’t repulsion, though it should have been. It was the thought of being at his mercy, at the mercy of his hands, just like Kenneth had been. Kenneth turned back to Amy. “If you don’t want to…do what he’s suggesting, I’ll make sure he leaves you alone. But…he is good at…taking care of people.” She wasn’t sure what she wanted. Well, she knew she wanted Kenneth. She’d wanted him since that first night. But Leon? She hadn’t entertained a thought about him at all. It had never even occurred to consider both men, even after watching them together. That wasn’t natural. But there were people who would claim that what Leon and Kenneth did together wasn’t natural. They’d be labeled sinners, condemned by most people if they knew. That was why Kenneth had feared her reaction. That was part of why she’d held back from letting him know she was watching. She didn’t see it that way. She knew they were just seeking comfort and relief where they could. Kenneth watched her, waiting for her reply. So did Leon. 63

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Could she do what Leon suggested? If Kenneth said she could trust him, then Amy knew she could. And she had witnessed firsthand just how much attention he gave to his partners. “I don’t…I don’t know how we’d do such a thing,” she managed to say. “All starts with you two getting a lot closer than you are,” Leon prompted. Kenneth took her hand and gently pulled her across the small room to Leon’s chair. Leon never took his eyes from the two of them, and she could see his growing desire. He looked at her differently than Kenneth did—he looked at her like a man who knew exactly how to get what he wanted from her. As soon as they were within touching distance, Leon caught Kenneth’s hand and yanked him closer. She wasn’t surprised when Leon forced him to bend, or when he sought out the mouth Amy had so recently kissed. Watching by the light of day was different than peeping around a curtain. For a moment, Kenneth held back, clearly hesitant for so blatant a move as what Leon made. But it took only until the first thrust of Leon’s tongue past firm lips for Kenneth to moan into the caress, gripping the back of Leon’s head as he returned the kiss with a matching ferocity. Her nipples tightened. This was better than spying in the shadows. Her fingers itched to reach out and touch each man’s mouth, learn how they molded over the other’s, but instead, she found herself smoothing her palm along Leon’s thigh. She boldly found the line of his erection and traced it through his rough pants. 64

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Leon broke away from the kiss with a ragged gasp. “You’re a spirited thing, ain’t you? No wonder Kenneth’s been sneaking away to play with you.” She shook her head. “It’s not like that.” His brow shot up as he looked back to Kenneth. “Well, I guess I shouldn’t be too surprised, considering how bothered you were coming to bed.” “No, I guess you shouldn’t be. We’ve only kissed.” Kenneth’s lips twitched, and Amy took that as a sign that he was finally starting to relax about the situation. “It’s far too cold in that barn to do anything else.” “Well, I’m most definitely not cold in here. In fact, think I’m more than a little warm.” Leon appraised her with a hungry sweep of his lashes. “What about you, little lady? This’ll be a hell of a lot more fun for all of us if we get some of these clothes out of the way.” It was a daring request, one she should refuse. Good women didn’t do this. Maybe she might explain away her dalliance with Kenneth as something to satisfy her loneliness, but choosing to be with two men was something only the prostitutes did. And then they got paid for their troubles. Her gaze dropped to his tented pants. It slid over to Kenneth’s. Of course, choosing to be with two men could also mean satisfying carnal desires that had been denied her for years. She was a healthy, strong woman. She deserved a little bit of happiness while she could take it. Especially if two young bucks like this wanted to give it to her. Amy knew Leon referred to her dress, but instead, she 65

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reached out and tugged at Kenneth’s shirt. She pulled it free of his waistband, glimpsing a flash of skin before she let it drop. It had been a long time since she’d undressed a grown man in an intimate way. She had unbuttoned and cut away dozens of shirts in her life as a nurse, but this was so very different. Kenneth caught his breath, his muscles trembling each time her knuckles brushed against his bare skin. He had bathed the night before and hadn’t bothered to put his long underwear back on. Now she studied the body she had fantasized about— dreamt about—more than once. His body was defined and lean, hard like his life had been. Hair covered his chest and thinned to a line that disappeared into his pants. Kenneth didn’t flinch away from her gaze, or her hands when they moved on to his belt. It was faded leather, frayed in spots, and Amy wouldn’t have been surprised to learn that he had inherited it from somebody else. With his shirt gone and his pants half off, she finally had a good idea of just how skinny he was. Whatever he did in Wyoming, it wasn’t eat. Leon was the one to yank at Kenneth’s pants, dragging them down his legs the rest of the way until he had no choice but to step out of them. Amy knelt down to work hurriedly at his boots, but once he was divested completely of his clothing, she didn’t rise right away. Her focus was transfixed by the sight of his long cock, the foreskin pulled back to reveal the smooth crown. A drop of pearly liquid collected at the slit, and her mouth watered. “Go ahead,” Leon murmured. His rough fingers caressed her cheek. “Don’t deny what you want, darlin’.” 66

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Amy swallowed. Her tongue darted out to moisten her lips, but she still couldn’t lean forward the few inches to taste him. It wasn’t until Leon slipped his hand to her nape and gently pressed her closer that she finally licked across the velvety tip. Kenneth whimpered and balled his fists at his side as his entire body tensed. She thought of the rough way Leon handled him, and wondered when anybody had touched him as tenderly as this. She brushed her tongue across his crown again, and he made the same, soft whimpering sound. One hand stayed at his side, but he reached for her with the other one, his callused fingers caressing her temple and the side of her face. She sensed his restraint in the touch, could almost feel his fingers shaking. Emboldened by his response, Amy glided her fingers over the coarse hair on his thigh, tickling to the join where it met his hip. His skin was almost unbearably hot, like he had his own internal fireplace ready to go up in smoke, but that was its own encouragement. She turned her head into his touch, and skimmed her lips down the length of his shaft, all the way to the tense muscle of his abdomen. His quick pulse throbbed through his flesh, pounding against her lips anywhere she touched him. His fingertips curled against her skin, stroking her lightly. She moved her mouth back up his length, and he twitched and jerked, as though the contact was just a little too much for him to tolerate. “There’s a spot right near the tip that drives him crazy,” Leon informed her, his voice more than a little ragged. 67

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Amy didn’t look at him or acknowledge him, but she circled the head with the tip of her tongue until he jumped and bit back a moan. She wasn’t sure she could find the spot again without numerous attempts, and the urge to do it then almost overwhelmed her. But Leon’s hand moved, sliding away from her neck to the upper swell of her breast. When he caught the point of her nipple through her dress and squeezed, she gasped and sat back on her heels, her head jerking to the side to see him regarding her hungrily. “As much fun as it can be torture Kenny boy, I think we’ll all be happier if he’s not the only one naked here.” He let her go and leaned back in the chair. “Let’s let Kenneth have a turn at you, huh?” Kenneth took her by the arms and pulled her to her feet. She turned around, and he wrapped his arm around her waist, pulling her back against his chest. He kissed the nape of her neck, and for a moment, she imagined how his mouth would feel on the rest of her body. His lips were soft and firm, his breath hot, the light whiskers of his mustache tickling her skin. His fingers went to her buttons, and she half-expected him to just tear them free, sending most of them scattering. But he was very careful as he freed them to reveal her shift. He used the same care on the thin buttons of her bodice before his hands pushed past the material to seek the warmth of her breasts. Her head dropped back against his chest, her eyes fluttering shut. Fire arced through her as he circled first one 68

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pebbled nipple and then the other. She barely felt Leon’s hands pulling at her garments, or the careful cup of his fingers around her ankle as he slipped her boots off. It was too hard to think with one man’s hands on her. Two was impossible. “Lord, she’s pretty.” Leon’s soft exclamation came with a tickle up the front of her thigh. “Look at her, Kenny. I’m beginning to think busting my ankle was the best thing that ever happened to us.” Kenneth did look at her. He spun her around so he could see the front of her body, and he studied her with rapt attention. His appreciation and desire were reflected in his expressive eyes, and his wonder at having the opportunity to look at her was obvious on his face. “The prettiest thing I have ever seen,” Kenneth murmured. Amy melted into his arms, her breasts flattening against his chest. At that moment, she didn’t want to be stared at, as good as it felt. She wanted to kiss him. And kiss him again. And keep on kissing him until she couldn’t feel her lips anymore. He opened to her immediately, holding her as tightly as she held him. Amy squirmed against the hard line of his erection, trapped between their bodies. Each time she moved, Kenneth groaned again, and his kisses became rougher. Warm hands slid between her thighs, pushing them apart, but Kenneth’s embrace hadn’t changed. He wasn’t the one touching her like that. He wasn’t the one brushing across her sensitive outer lips. “You’re a lucky son of a bitch,” Leon said. “I don’t think 69

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I’ve ever seen a woman this wet for it before.” Kenneth broke from her mouth to bury his face in her neck. He kissed the skin beneath her ear, then at the hollow of her throat. Every brush of contact made her muscles clench and made her wetter for him. Leon continued to tease and caress her lips, his other hand smoothing over the back of her thighs and the curve of her ass. Kenneth used her bare skin like a canvas, painting her in kisses and sighs. He gradually moved lower, until his tongue slid over her nipple. “I’ve been thinking about kissing every inch of you,” Kenneth confessed, the words tickling her. “And it makes me ache.” Amy clutched at his shoulder, bowing her head to brush her mouth over his hair. “I’ve been thinking about you, too,” she whispered. She didn’t want Leon to think her sentiment was meant for him. It wasn’t. She welcomed his touch now, but ultimately, it was Kenneth who consumed her thoughts. Kenneth ran his thumb over a patch of dark skin on her ribs, below her breast. It was just a birthmark, but he seemed particularly fascinated by it. He traced the shape with the tip of his tongue, then kissed the center of the mark with tender lips. Without looking up, he wrapped his arm around her waist and lifted her from the ground. Her legs went around his hips automatically, holding him tightly. “Someone’s being selfish.” Leon’s slight singsong broke through the spell winding around Amy, and she glanced over her shoulder to see him looking around the room. “How am I supposed to be able to get my share if she’s going to ride you 70

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like that? My damn leg is in the way.” It was. He had it stretched out in front of him, in order to take the weight off his ankle. He was really too far away to do anything but touch like he had been, and somehow, Amy suspected that wasn’t nearly enough for the man. “Lay back on the table,” Leon ordered. “Let her ride you that way. Then I can get a taste of both of you.” “Before you ask,” Kenneth said, stepping back until his ass met the edge of the table, “he is always this bossy. I think he’s been in too much pain the past few days to really show that side of himself.” “Me being bossy has saved your ass more than once,” Leon reminded him as he turned in the chair to face them. “That’s true, too.” Kenneth settled on the hard surface without releasing her, and she bent her legs, resting her knees on either side of his hips. His cock rested between her lips, throbbing against her flesh, and she ached to finally have him inside her as he smoothed his palms over her breasts and down her ribs. Amy jumped when she felt Leon’s hands stroking over her again, this time caressing her bottom. He traced between the cheeks, up and down, to find her wet opening and sink a single finger inside. She gasped, but he withdrew it almost immediately. The distinct sound of licking followed, then Leon’s moan. When his hand returned, it was to grasp Kenneth’s prick at the base, pulling until Amy lifted her hips. She stopped as the tip found her opening, but the firm angle meant Leon wasn’t 71

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letting go. “I think I’ve got the best seat in the house.” His other hand rested on the small of her back, pushing only enough to prompt her to slide down Kenneth’s length. All three of them moaned then, Kenneth’s loudest of all. “God…Amy…Amy…” She cut off further words by bending and capturing his mouth. Amy couldn’t imagine anything feeling better than Kenneth filling her body as they shared another slow, searching kiss. There wasn’t a single barrier between them, and she thought his skin would be completely imprinted on hers, and the memory of that moment would reside in her flesh. She couldn’t imagine anything better until Leon gently guided her up Kenneth’s shaft again, and then ducked his head. His hair tickled her thigh, and his breath was unbelievably hot on her skin. His whiskers brushed against her, his moan vibrated through her, and then his tongue glanced over her swollen lips. She cried out against Kenneth’s mouth. Her first reaction was to push back, to deepen the contact of tongue to soft, hot flesh. Kenneth caught the motion to grip her hips, taking control of her rotating hips to pull her back up. It was easier to let him. Her thighs trembled, and if it weren’t for the table, she was sure she’d collapse against him. He stretched her passage in agonizing inches, only to leave her aching and empty when he forced her to rise up again. “I didn’t…” Know was the word she couldn’t utter, but it 72

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failed to come. Amy couldn’t speak. She hadn’t realized lovemaking could be like this, that it could feel like flying out of her body at the same time everything shrank down to her and Kenneth and the space they occupied together. Teeth caught against her folds, but this time, Kenneth was the one who choked on a cry, his jaw clenching as he squeezed his eyes shut. He didn’t break the slow rhythm he’d set, but she still didn’t know why he’d react so strongly to a single bite. Until hungry sucking sounds came from Leon behind her. Then she knew. And the image of Leon’s mouth hot on Kenneth’s cock or balls made her clench around the throbbing shaft buried inside her. Kenneth clenched as well, his hips lifting off the table, as if to press harder against Leon’s mouth. She heard Leon fumbling with something, and thought it must have been his pants when she felt a warm sigh across her flesh. Kenneth’s moans continued without pause, escaping his throat with each breath, even when their mouths came together again. She swallowed each sound, trapping it, letting it grow in her own throat. Amy squirmed against him until the rough hair at his base scraped against her sensitive nub of skin. She shifted her hips just enough to adjust the angle, and each time she came down on his length, a different sort of pleasure erupted through her. Her muscles were tight, her throat constricted, her stomach doing slow flips with each added sensation. She knew it was possible to feel a release from lovemaking. Though it hadn’t happened every time with 73

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Ernest, there had been a few instances where everything had come together, where desire met dedication, where he had stoked the fires in her high enough for her to enjoy their joining, too. Already, she knew this was different. It was more than having both men there to pleasure her, though she felt decadent with such riches. It was the bliss Kenneth couldn’t hide. It was the desperate grasp of his hands to her body, holding onto her like there was nothing else in the world he wanted. It was years of waiting, of loneliness dissipating in the quickening strokes of his flesh into hers. When thick fingers pushed inside her channel to join Kenneth’s cock, Amy stiffened. She slammed down onto them, feeling the heel of Leon’s hand against her bottom, and ground once before shifting up. The next drive downward unbuckled everything—her grip on the table, the tightening coil in the pit of her stomach, the tension in her legs. Amy tore away from Kenneth’s mouth and screamed, the sound shattering in the hot air and raining down around her enflamed skin. Kenneth arched off the table and thrust into her one final time. She felt his thick shaft jerk against her walls, and then his hot fluid filled her. He had been so vocal until then that she waited for him to shout, but he was completely silent, his Adam’s apple bobbing as he swallowed again and again. His hands were all over her body, caressing and massaging and scratching her skin. Amy knew she’d be marked by his climax, but she didn’t mind. 74

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And then they were kissing again, Kenneth wrapping his arms around her back and holding her in place against him. She was lost in his kisses for so long, she never felt Leon pull away. “Now wasn’t that better than the barn?” The unexpected comment made her snort in amusement, and she broke away from Kenneth’s mouth with a smile. “Yeah,” she said softly. “It was.” “Much better.” He touched her cheek, then looked over her shoulder to Leon. “Did you…finish?” “Figures you two would be so wrapped up in yourselves you wouldn’t notice.” The chair scraped across the floor. “But next time, I get the table.” Her eyes widened at his words. She hadn’t thought about the next time, except to think of Kenneth inside her again. She wasn’t sure she wanted the two men to trade places. But she couldn’t very well say so out loud. What she could say was… “Is next time me peeping out from behind the curtain again?” “If you’re asking if Leon would ever…we don’t do anything that involves a table.” “Kenneth draws the line at handjobs and the occasional blowjob,” Leon provided. She had questions galore to ask about his relationship with Leon, now that everything seemed to be out in the open. But not in front of him. She wasn’t even sure she’d find the nerve to ask out of his presence, either. She liked Kenneth, far more than she’d ever imagined she could. She didn’t want to risk 75

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pushing him away by looking clingy or possessive. Leon had come first, after all. As far as she knew, Leon would come last, too. “We’ll just have to take it as it comes then.” She smiled down at Kenneth as she peeled away. Perspiration made both of them slick. “And now I have to figure out how to go out and milk that cow without either one of my legs working.” “On the bright side, you might be able to milk Hazel now without getting distracted by other things. And by that, I mean I’ll take care of the horses instead of distracting you.” “Had your fill of me already?” Kenneth laughed, his eyes dancing with amusement. “No. I’ll be more than happy to continue distracting you in the barn.” “While I’m stuck in here with my bum ankle.” But there was a smile splitting Leon’s features as she climbed off and reached for her clothes. “Thanks a lot.” “That’ll teach you to fall off horses, won’t it?” Kenneth asked as he sat up. “Though, if you hadn’t, we wouldn’t even be here.” Amy was sticky and slightly sore, and as she shimmied back into her shift, she felt Leon’s heavy gaze returning to her body. It didn’t make her self-conscious like it had before, but there was something still a little disconcerting about it. She dismissed the feelings. Now wasn’t the time to dwell on it. If she did, she feared her thoughts would continue in even more traitorous directions, and the last thing she wanted was to spoil her good mood. 76

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She shot one last shy smile at Kenneth before retreating to her bedroom to get dressed again. Hopefully, he’d get a chance to talk to Leon about staying soon. Then she wouldn’t have to worry about losing these feelings at all. She just prayed Leon wouldn’t need much convincing.

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CHAPTER 6 Amy stepped over the packed snow, humming under her breath. She couldn’t remember the last time she had been in this good of a mood. Even Woody had noticed the difference when he had come home from school the day before. She and Kenneth had taken special care to make sure there were no signs of what had happened. Even Leon was on his best behavior, showing Woody how to whittle a piece of wood he’d been using to keep his hands busy. But she couldn’t hide the way looking at Kenneth made her smile. Or how his shy glances in her direction brought a blush to her cheeks. Giving in to their desire seemed to only cement the attraction they felt toward each other, not dull its 78

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edges. She hoped more than ever that he could find a way to convince Leon to stay in Yellow Rock. If not that, maybe he could finally find the fortitude to move on from his friend. There was still the lingering fear that she was merely a distraction as they passed through, but his attitude toward her afterward suggested otherwise. They were running low on a few things, so that morning, she had left with Woody to walk him to school. The extra mouths and extra bodies meant going through her supplies twice as fast, in spite of her efforts to ration. At least they didn’t have to worry about meat. Kenneth had gone out the night before and brought back three rabbits. He’d seemed so proud of himself, especially after she’d followed him out to the barn to thank him privately. But other items couldn’t be shot or trapped. She needed to replenish her flour and coffee stores, as well as buy more soap. The mercantile was overly warm, the stove in the middle of the floor stoked high enough to make Amy loosen her scarf from around her neck. She smiled at Mrs. Underwood as she approached the counter. It wouldn’t be that difficult to be pleasant this morning. Though the owner’s wife wasn’t one of her favorite people, Amy didn’t think even she could spoil her good mood. “Good morning,” she said brightly. She peeled off her mittens and stuffed them into her pockets. “How are you and the family doing today? Survive the storm all right?” “Well enough, I suppose.” Watery gray eyes narrowed as they inspected her. “I can’t say I expected to see you in town. 79

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Got an emergency to tend to?” “No, no, just need to pick up a few things.” She pointed to the various barrels as she spoke. “Some coffee and flour, please. A couple pounds each.” Her order took Mrs. Underwood by surprise. “I thought your stocks would’ve lasted longer than that. You planning on holing yourself in for the rest of the winter?” “Just don’t want to be caught out again, in case another storm comes through.” As Mrs. Underwood weighed out the flour, Amy pulled her small purse out of her pocket. Coins jangled inside. Though she hadn’t asked for it, Kenneth had stopped her before going out, pressing a few coins into her hand. He hadn’t explained it. He didn’t have to. He wanted to contribute any way he could. She respected him even more for that. “Should’ve been at church Sunday,” Mrs. Underwood said. “You missed the big announcement.” Amy never went to church. It was yet another stigma that set her apart in the community. She wasn’t Mormon, and it felt wrong worshiping in a Mormon church. Sunday mornings, she and Woody read from the Bible together and talked about what it said. That was the best way to teach him about God in Amy’s mind. “Oh? What announcement was that?” Not that she really cared, since most of the big announcements had more to do with the church than anything that made a difference in her life, but it was better to sound interested rather than alienate others even more. 80

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“About those stagecoach robbers. Word is, they might be headed this way. We have to be careful. Keep our eyes open.” Mrs. Underwood spoke as if Amy should know what robbers she referred to, but Amy didn’t have a clue. Not much exciting happened in Yellow Rock, especially nothing as interesting as stagecoach robbers. This was likely just an attempt to keep the townsfolk distracted from the inclement weather. “Well, there’s not much here worth stealing,” Amy said. “I can’t imagine why robbers would bother with us.” “One of ’em’s hurt, apparently. They say he broke his leg or his ankle or something when they tried getting away from the last coach they robbed.” She was very glad that Mrs. Underwood still had her back to Amy. Her blood had run cold, and she was very sure all the color had leeched from her face. “One of them? How many of them are there?” “Two. Supposed to be very dangerous, they are.” She turned around and set the bag of flour on the counter. “Though I guess you’d have to be, to be willing to rob coaches like that.” “Yes, you’d have to be.” She barely saw Mrs. Underwood finish with her order, and she barely remembered asking for another bar of soap. Her mind kept going over and over what she’d said, the few details twisting and tangling to try and make a different picture than the one they insisted upon. As she passed over the coins to pay for her purchase, she asked, “How long ago did they rob that 81

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coach? If it’s been awhile, maybe we’re safe.” Mrs. Underwood shook her head vehemently. “It hasn’t been that long. Not even two weeks. And with that storm, they could’ve hidden themselves away for a few days, thinking they were safe.” Because they were. Amy didn’t hum as she left the mercantile. She didn’t hear the trudge of her boots against the snow. She couldn’t stop the maelstrom of fears coursing through her. Terror that she’d harbored two stagecoach robbers. That she’d welcomed them into her home. That she’d opened her heart to one of them, and her body to both. She bent her head against the cold. How could she be such an idiot? She should have paid attention to her first instincts and demanded they leave, no matter what Woody wanted. Except even fearing what she did, Amy knew she couldn’t turn a hurt man out into a storm. Leon would have lost his foot if she hadn’t tended it. Kenneth might have gotten killed trying to protect his friend. Oh, Lord. Kenneth. He’d lied to her this whole time. He and Leon had probably been having a good laugh every time she left them alone. Fooling the stupid widow. Taking advantage of her desire to satisfy their own carnal urges. She could almost see Leon taking pleasure in duping her, but Kenneth? Sweet, shy, doting Kenneth? Amy shoved aside her hurt for a more powerful emotional weapon. How dare they put her and Woody in such danger? They could fool her once, but damned if she was going to let 82

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them do it again. She had withstood a lot greater dangers than two young men who thought they had the right to simply take whatever they wanted. She wasn’t about to let this break her down when other, worthier adversaries had failed. By the time she reached the house, Amy had a plan. There was always the chance that they weren’t the stagecoach robbers, though she sincerely doubted it was a good chance. The timing and the circumstances were just too similar. But she wouldn’t accuse them of it to their faces. She wouldn’t bring it up in front of Leon. He was the more volatile of the two. From the beginning, Kenneth had been the one she could reason with. She’d simply do it again. Kenneth was sitting at the table with Leon, speaking in a low voice. She strained to catch what he was saying, but couldn’t make out a single word. As soon as he saw her, he jumped to his feet and went to the door. “Here, let me take your bags.” A childish instinct didn’t want her to hand them over, but Amy ignored it and let him take her parcels, keeping her eyes away from Leon. He’d be able to read her better than Kenneth. He’d know from the start something was up. “I need to milk Hazel,” she said. “Kenneth, do you mind coming out and feeding the horses? I’ve had enough of the cold for one day, and the sooner I get back in, the better.” “But you already…” He paused, the confusion in his eyes replaced with something more hopeful. “Sure.” He set the parcels down and reached for his hat. “It’s getting a bit stuffy 83

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in here anyway.” She almost felt guilty for dragging him outside. He expected kissing quite likely, not the interrogation she had in mind. But then she remembered Mrs. Underwood’s words and her resolve firmed. Kenneth was the one who had lied. He was the one who should be feeling guilty. He followed her almost eagerly to the barn, but when they stepped inside, she skirted beyond his reach when he tried to touch her. “Don’t. I didn’t ask you out here for that.” To his credit, he didn’t press for more contact once she moved. He stood in place, looking slightly perplexed, like he had no idea what she could possibly want to talk to him about. He was either clueless, or a great actor. Not actor, liar. “What’s going on?” She kept her chin high. “I want you to tell me exactly how Leon hurt his foot.” “He fell off his horse.” “Something must have spooked the horse then. Was somebody after you?” His gaze slid away from her. “It was a snake.” Amy arched a brow. “In Wyoming? In the middle of winter? You really expect me to believe that?” “No. I don’t. There wasn’t a snake.” Kenneth visibly deflated, his shoulders slumping. “His horse was shot at a full run. Leon is lucky he didn’t break his neck or crack his head open.” Fear settled in her stomach, hard and cold. Her hand was 84

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shaking, but she gripped the wooden slat of Hazel’s pen to hide it. “But you have two horses here.” “We found another one.” “They’re talking about two stagecoach robbers in town. Young men. One of them has a broken leg or ankle. That’s you two, isn’t it?” “Amy…I…yeah. It’s us. We were…we were just looking for a place to sit out the storm. If Woody hadn’t found us…you would have never known we were here.” “You lied to me.” “I know. I’m…the stupid thing is, I’m not a good liar. I don’t like lying. I didn’t want to lie to you, but I had to say something so you would help Leon and…I’m sorry.” “You’re sorry?” She stared at him in disbelief. “You think that’s going to make any of this even better? You’re wanted, Kenneth. You’ve even got people looking for you here, though for the life of me, I can’t figure out why they’d bother looking this far away from Wyoming.” An awful thought dawned on her, and even more heat fled her flesh. “Except you probably weren’t even in Wyoming. That’s probably a lie, too. Just like everything else that’s come out of your mouth.” “No! I mean…yes, that one other thing is a lie. We weren’t in Wyoming, we were down in New Mexico. We didn’t have coats because we were down in New Mexico. Leon broke his ankle when the marshal shot at his horse. But I never lied about anything else. I never lied about how I feel about you.” “Of course you didn’t. You didn’t have to. I practically threw myself at you.” 85

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“You didn’t. You were just…lonely.” Kenneth rubbed the back of his neck and his attention landed briefly on her face before he looked away again. “Will you let us leave? I know you don’t owe us anything, but if you turn us over to the authorities, they’ll hang us.” His words sizzled between them as she gaped at him. Had she ever known this man at all? “Hang you? How many coaches did you rob?” “Three this winter. But that’s not…I don’t know why, but the signs we saw in Spanish Fork says we’re wanted for murder. But we’ve never killed anybody. Please, Amy. We’re not killers.” She started shaking her head as soon as the word “murder” came out of his mouth. By the time he was done, she was retreating to the other end of the barn. “I can’t believe I let you touch me. I can’t believe…” She swallowed against the tightness of her throat. “My son looked up to you. You actually made me believe that you cared about us.” “I do care about you. I care about both of you more than…more than you would probably believe right now.” “Because we were a means to an end. You needed me to keep you safe. To help Leon.” Kenneth shook his head. “You were never a means to an end. If I just wanted to use you that way, I wouldn’t have… I know that I should have just…kept to myself. I know that we should have left as soon as the snow stopped. But I…I just wanted…I just wanted to know you.” 86

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Know her. Oddly enough, she believed him when he said that. He was too young, too green, to be quite crafty enough to deceive her in that regard. He had held himself back until she’d prompted him to ask for more, and it had taken Leon’s taunting inside to move beyond the kissing. But that didn’t make her feel any better about the situation. Because it still came down to the fact that they had lied to her. She was harboring two wanted men in her house. Men wanted for murder, even if Kenneth claimed their innocence. If the marshal found out, there would be questions. She didn’t trust either of them not to implicate her in some way, or at the very least, sully her reputation even further. Kenneth had lied to Woody when he’d said he wanted to protect Amy’s reputation. He was only interested in saving his own skin. So was she. And if she went to the authorities now with what she knew, she’d end up in trouble, too. They could even take her away from Woody, and that just wasn’t something she could stomach. “Things are going to change around here,” she said tightly. “Don’t think you’re going to get away with all of this.” “What do you want me to do?” “Strike a trade. I won’t turn you in, but in return, you’re going to work around here. I want the coop fixed, solid, so I can use it again. I want you out hunting or trapping or something, so I have meat to last us through the winter. You’ll do whatever odd job I ask you to, no questions asked, and in return, I’ll let you stay until Leon’s ankle is good enough to ride again.” 87

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“That sounds like a fair trade. You know I would have done all of that for you anyway, Amy.” “Do I?” Her resolve was weakening. He looked so contrite, his gaze unwavering. “All I know is you’ve been lying to me since you got here.” “I know. But I’m not going to do that anymore. You’re probably not going to believe that either, and I don’t blame you. I hope I can prove it to you, though.” Amy turned away from his pleading gaze. Falling for it once was more than enough. “I don’t want you around the house today. Go hunting or something.” An awful thought occurred to her and she looked back at him with wide eyes. “And don’t get caught.” Because the last thing she needed was him leading the marshal back to her house with Leon convalescing. “I’m not going to get caught. I’ve been able to avoid anybody seeing me so far.” He began walking backward to the door. “I’ll be back before dark. And I don’t think you should tell Leon that you know.” “Why not?” “Because I don’t want him to take off while I’m out hunting. Leon doesn’t trust anybody but himself. If you tell him about this trade, he’ll just think you’re going to doublecross us and I’m a fool.” Amy rolled her eyes. “Like I haven’t already been played for a fool?” She headed for the door. “He can’t even get his boot on. He’s not going anywhere. Even if he wanted to.” Kenneth stepped aside and allowed her to pass him without 88

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coming within touching distance. “Well, you and I know that. I just hope he doesn’t try to…never mind, that’s not your problem.” “I’ll remind him.” She yanked the door open, almost welcoming the fresh blast of cold air against her cheeks. It was on the tip of her tongue to warn him to be careful, but at the last minute, she stifled the urge. He didn’t need her worrying about him. She certainly didn’t need to be expending any more energy doing so. Without another word, she headed back to the house.

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CHAPTER 7 Though she hadn’t exactly promised, Amy didn’t say a word to Leon about finding out the truth. In fact, she didn’t say a word to him at all. She went straight to her room and gathered the dirty clothes and bed linens, prepared to use the laundry as a means to keep busy and out of his way. There was one tense moment when he asked where Kenneth had taken himself off to, but Amy’s explanation that he’d gone hunting appeased him. Long enough for her to bustle with fetching and warming water anyway. He focused on his whittling, whistling under his breath, as his eyes flickered with her every movement. It made her skin crawl. He missed nothing. He evidenced 90

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that with nearly everything that had ever come out of his mouth. The way he watched her now made her feel like a mouse scuttling about, oblivious to the cat waiting to pounce. She dropped the soap repeatedly, and once, she nearly soaked the bodice of her dress. His gaze finally became too much as she was wringing out one of Woody’s shirts. “Will you stop that infernal whistling?” she snapped. “It’s giving me a headache.” “Sure thing, darling. Though I don’t think it’s my whistling that’s got you all knotted up.” “I’m not knotted up. I just have a lot to get done.” The line she had run over the corner near the fireplace fell beneath the weight of the new shirt she added to it, and she cursed silently. “Now look what you made me do.” “You’re in quite the mood, aren’t you? Maybe you shouldn’t have let Kenny disappear for the afternoon.” Amy turned her back on him, struggling to make a fresh knot in her clothesline that would stay. “Like I really want him hanging around,” she muttered. “Are you two already fighting?” Leon sounded, at most, mildly interested in the answer to that question. She had a feeling he was just talking to needle her. “That didn’t take long.” “Really? Because five days of lies seem pretty long to me.” Leon didn’t respond for a long moment, but she didn’t bother glancing over her shoulder to see what he was doing. Then he sighed. “I swear to God, the only way to keep that 91

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boy’s mouth shut is to nail his lips together.” Amy whirled, unable to contain herself any longer. “Oh, don’t worry about your precious boy. He didn’t tell me anything I didn’t already find out in town. Oh, except the part where you two are murderers on top of being thieves. He shared that little tidbit on his own.” “Kenneth is not a murderer.” The wry amusement was gone from Leon’s voice. “He’s going to have to answer to his God for a number of crimes, but murder isn’t one of them.” She shook her head. “Well, at least you two are sticking to the same story. I suppose that counts for something, at least.” “It’s not a story if it’s the truth. And it doesn’t count for shit if you’ve already made your mind up and found him guilty on the basis of hearsay and rumors.” “Marshals aren’t hearsay. Being wanted for hanging isn’t a rumor.” Amy finally got the knot to stick and pulled the line taut, hooking it over the curved post drilled into the wall. Her hands were numb from the washing, though she imagined that part of it was the sheer multitude of emotions wreaking havoc inside her all day. “Anyway, what do you care what I think? You only care about not getting turned in.” “Last time I checked, a man is entitled to a trial in this country. Marshals don’t always stay on their side of a law, and men have been hanged for less than a rumor. You’re a smart lady, I can’t believe I have to explain that to you. And I, personally, don’t give a shit what you think, but he does.” Getting rebuked by a wanted man stung, but silently, Amy knew he had a point, albeit a small one. She was often 92

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condemned without people even knowing who she was, simply because she wasn’t a Mormon like the rest of the community. It stood to reason that the same could hold true for Kenneth and Leon. Except Kenneth had freely admitted to robbing three stagecoaches that winter already. Which still made him a thief and a liar. “I don’t know why. Except to think he’s worried about me turning you two in, which I already said I wouldn’t.” “I gathered that much, or else we would have already been gone. Kenneth is young, but he isn’t stupid. He cares about what you think because he cares about you. Seems obvious enough to me.” Her hands shook as she gingerly tried Woody’s shirt on the line again. That was part of why all this hurt so much. She’d honestly cared about Kenneth. She felt ridiculous for thinking he was a decent man, or that there might be some kind of future there if he could convince Leon to stay. That would never happen now. “So why are they saying you two are wanted for murder then? Why am I supposed to believe two men who have only lied to me over believing the law?” “I don’t know why they’re saying it. I didn’t fire a single shot before my horse went out from under me, and Kenneth was too focused on getting out of there in one piece to return fire. Maybe somebody got hit in the confusion. Or maybe it’s easier to frighten people if they think there are some stonecold killers on the loose. And judging from your reaction, it 93

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worked.” With the clothes hanging up, she didn’t have any more excuse to keep her back to Leon. She turned around and leveled what she hoped was her haughtiest glare at him. “For your information, hearing they wanted to hang you for murder was just the last straw. I got angry just knowing you two had been lying to me all along.” “What? Did we hurt your feelings? Excuse the hell out of us for not wanting to walk right into the noose. I’m sure you would never do anything questionable to protect yourself or somebody you love, but neither one of us feel like dying right now.” Her jaw dropped. “You don’t know that I wouldn’t have turned you in!” “Most people would have turned us in and slept the sleep of the righteous. I’m not a gambling man, Mrs. Northe, especially when I can’t run as fast as the men after me. And that boy you so easily dismiss as a killer would do anything to protect the people he cares about.” Her teeth clicked shut again. She’d witnessed Kenneth’s devotion firsthand. He’d been adamant from the beginning about Leon’s ankle, volunteering for tasks before she had the chance to ask. She didn’t dare presume that was as altruistic as Leon made it sound, but when it came to his best friend at least, it was most definitely true. “He doesn’t have people he cares about. He has you.” “Why aren’t you turning us in now? Did you come to some sort of agreement with him?” 94

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Kenneth’s warning echoed inside her head. “I’m not turning you in, because I’m a non-Mormon widow who refuses to marry one of the oh-so available bachelors in the middle of a Mormon community. They’re just looking for a reason to get rid of me for good. I’m not about to hand it to them on a silver platter.” “I think if Kenneth only cared about me, that reason wouldn’t have persuaded him to stick around and risk it. Hell, if I were mobile, it wouldn’t work on me.” This conversation was getting her nowhere. Amy wasn’t even sure what had dragged her into it in the first place. With a shake of her head, she returned to her cool wash water and bent down to pick up the basin. “Then I guess it’s a good thing for me you’re stuck in that chair for the time being.” “I guess it’s a good thing for all of us. I know I don’t mind having a warm place to sleep at night.” She wanted to tell him part of the deal was sleeping in the barn, that he could freeze his toes off, as far as she was concerned. But she didn’t. She simply carried the basin to the doorway and dumped it into the snowdrift. The way it slowly melted looked too much like how broken down she felt. She slammed the door a little too hard after that. *

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the door, Woody went straight to Leon and begged to be shown some of his whittling tricks again. Leon had cast a sly smirk in Amy’s direction and agreed. She had to bite her cheek to keep from running over and dragging Woody away from him. The only problem was…Leon didn’t act any differently around Woody. He wasn’t nearly as jovial and friendly as Kenneth was around her son, but he certainly wasn’t as brusque as he’d been those first two days. Leon behaved as if everything was still the same, as if he wasn’t a wanted criminal, as if there was nowhere else in the world he would rather be. If she was being honest with herself, she hadn’t seen Woody smile so much in quite a long time. She’d put a rabbit stew on, something that would keep until Kenneth got back, but the hearty food choked in her throat as she tried to join them for dinner. She didn’t taste the succulent meat, the meat they only had because of Kenneth, and she couldn’t enjoy the sounds of pleasure coming from Woody and Leon. Her thoughts kept going back over the day, over everything Leon had said, everything Kenneth had said, everything that she had done and felt prior to discovering the truth. By the time the dishes were done, she wanted to crawl out of her own skin. “I’m going to fetch some firewood,” she announced. “Woody, sit and work on your numbers.” His crestfallen gaze lifted from the half-finished statue 96

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Leon cradled in his hand. “Do I have to, Ma?” “You heard her,” Leon corrected before she could admonish her son. “And don’t be talking to your ma that way. It’s not respectful.” Woody immediately looked abashed and darted to get his school things. Amy mumbled a quick thank you, but she was out the door before bothering with anything else. She didn’t want to look at the man. She didn’t want to hear a stagecoach robber telling her son how to behave. Without the sun, the air was frigid, her breath heavy in front of her face. Amy ducked her head and walked around the edge of the house to the lean-to. The darkness welcomed her with open arms, but she was oblivious to it until she came to a stop in front of the woodpile. Her chest hitched. She’d been holding herself together for so long. In the quiet of the night, everything came unfettered. Amy did everything she could to muffle the sound of her tears. She didn’t want Leon to hear and have even more ammunition against her, and she especially didn’t want Woody to come out and investigate. And he would. Just the hint of tears from his mother would be enough to distress Woody, and she didn’t know how to explain everything to him. So she hugged herself, thin arms wrapped around her shivering frame, trying to pull everything back together again, but unable to overcome her own frustration, anger, confusion, and bitter disappointment. She didn’t expect to feel a firm, but gentle, hand on her shoulder, or be pulled against a familiar masculine chest. 97

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His light jacket was stiff with cold, but the body beneath was warm and solid, as warm and solid as if they’d been curled up next to each other in front of the fire. That one stray thought was enough for Amy to bury her face in his shoulder, her shoulders wracking from the force of her tears. When Kenneth rested his cheek on the top of her head, tightening his arms around her, she only sobbed harder. Kenneth didn’t try to tell her to stop crying, or assure her that everything was going to be fine. Everything wasn’t fine, and they both knew it. He kept one arm around her, while his other hand moved beneath her open coat. She stiffened, expecting him to try to take liberties, but he just pressed his palm against the small of her back, holding her even closer. “You’re shivering. You’re going to get sick if you stay out here in the cold.” Amy shook her head. “I can’t. I can’t…I don’t know how to face it right now. I don’t…” Nothing made sense. Not the world. Not her thoughts. Not anything. Well, maybe one thing. Kenneth’s solid chest beneath her cheek. That felt right when the rest of her world didn’t. “It’s fine. You don’t have to face it right now. I’ll keep you warm.” His lips moved against her hair as he spoke, but he wasn’t quite kissing her. Except for the fact that she knew exactly how he looked and felt without his clothes on, the embrace could have been chaste. His soothing voice did more to quell her tears than any amount of heat he might share. Slowly, Amy relaxed in his arms, trying to ignore the dark thoughts lurking in the corners, 98

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waiting to subdue her yet again. It was the hardest thing she had ever done. Harder than burying Ernest. Harder than leaving everything she knew behind to follow him west. But she did it, because she knew if she didn’t, the darkness would win. “Tell me you didn’t kill anyone.” Even to her ears, it sounded like begging. Maybe she was. “Tell me you were never going to hurt me or Woody.” “I was never going to hurt you, and I never meant to, though I know I have. And I’ve never killed anybody.” Kenneth’s voice was soft in the darkness, but still strong. “I’m going to tell you exactly what happened. When we stopped the coach, we knew the driver was armed, so Leon was covering him while I opened the door. I wasn’t as careful as I should have been, and just before one of the passengers took a shot, I saw the star on his chest. I don’t know what he was aiming at, but he hit Leon’s horse. The shot spooked all of the horses, and the ones hitched to the stagecoach took off. In the chaos, I pulled Leon from beneath his horse, and we ran the opposite direction. It must have took some time to get the horses under control. Enough to buy us some miles and distance.” It was mostly the same story Leon had told, though with greater detail. Amy knew they could have colluded beforehand about what their version would be, but this didn’t resemble Kenneth’s halting half-lies that he’d told from the very start. He spoke too surely for it to be anything but the truth. She squeezed her eyes shut. “No more lies. Whatever else you do while you’re here, promise me you’re not going to lie 99

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to me anymore.” “I promise. I don’t want to lie to you, Amy. I never wanted to lie to you. When you were asking me in the barn if we could stay, all I wanted to do was tell you the truth. That it’s too dangerous because we’re on the run, but I’ve never wanted anything more.” “I wanted it, too.” It came out in a whisper, but her breath still hung in a silvery cloud that trailed over his shoulder. “That’s why this hurts so much.” “If you still want it, I’ll find a way. I’ll fix this.” That was what finally pulled her away. Tilting her head back, Amy gazed up at Kenneth, his face masked by shadows. She was grateful for the dark. It hid how awful she must look from her crying. “I don’t see how you can. Or why you’d go to so much trouble trying. You can’t change the past, Kenneth. Trust me. I’ve tried.” He cupped the side of her face, caressing her mouth and chin with his thumb. She sensed him move, but she couldn’t see the outline of his face. The only hint that he was about to kiss her was the puff of warm breath across her cool skin. She knew his lips couldn’t be as hot as they felt, but the moment he kissed her, heat erupted through her flesh and down her spine. “Maybe I can’t, but I’ll still try.” She turned into his palm, her mouth brushing over the rough calluses on the heel. Her heart had chosen that moment to start racing, thudding in her ears loud enough to drown 100

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everything but him out. It was ridiculous to be so overwhelmed by his declaration. Nothing had really changed. Her breath caught. Nothing had really changed. Kenneth was still the same gentle soul who had risked life and limb to save his friend. He was still the trusting man who had believed her when she’d said she wouldn’t turn him in. He was still the careful lover who made her feel beautiful when she knew she was anything but. It wasn’t in him to kill anyone. She knew that now. And she believed him when he vowed to try. “What do you want?” she said softly. “Forget what you think I want. Do you want to stay because you’re tired of running?” “No. I’m not tired of running. Leon has been the closest thing I’ve had to a family for the past five years. We’re in all of this together, and that’s the way it’s always been. I want to stay because of you.” She had no idea how it could ever work. Leon wasn’t likely to let Kenneth go without a fight, and there was still the matter of the marshal to deal with. Entertaining the notion that they had any kind of future was foolhardy at best. But she did. She wanted to. All the anguish from that entire day stemmed from one irreconcilable fact. She cared about Kenneth more than anyone she had met since Ernest. And if she was being honest, she desired him more than anyone ever at all. With her hand resting on his chest, Amy lifted her chin, stretching those few inches necessary to graze her lips over 101

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his. They were still hot, almost quivering. Like he was actually nervous about what her reaction might be. So she kissed him again, more firmly. Kenneth parted his mouth slightly. She felt his lips move against hers, and waited for the light brush of his tongue. When it happened, it sent a shock through her. He became more emboldened, exploring more of her mouth. Soon, the kiss had completely shifted and Kenneth was controlling the caress. His mouth was firm, his fingers digging into her back, and she sensed more than just a hint of desire in him. “I’m supposed to be getting firewood,” she gasped in between kisses. “Woody will come out and see what’s wrong.” “Come out to the barn with me.” He smoothed his palm over her hair. “Tell them you’re going to help me with the game.” “All right.” She replied without hesitation, and it wasn’t until she’d pulled back that she even wondered if there was actual game. Not that it mattered. She needed to be with him, and she didn’t need Leon’s smirking in the background or Woody’s hero worship in the way. “There’s rabbit stew. Do you want me to bring a bowl out for you?” “No. Thank you. I’ll eat when we go back inside.” He pressed his mouth against hers in a final, hard kiss. “I don’t want to waste any time alone I have with you.” Neither did she. It was the first moment of hope she’d felt all day. 102

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Kenneth waited until she slipped inside the house before gathering up the three gutted rabbits he had left in the snow. He was tired of settling for small game, and he wanted to at least find a deer for Amy, but all of the deer would be skinny and hungry this time of year. She needed somebody to make sure she had plenty of food stores before the winter started. Not somebody. Him. But she was right. It wasn’t possible. He couldn’t just make his crimes and sins disappear. Even if it looked like Amy might be able to forgive him one day for the way he had hurt her. When he had seen her crying, the most natural thing to do was wrap his arms around her. He mostly expected her to fight him, but when she went into his embrace and buried her face against his chest, he didn’t want to let her go. He didn’t think anything could make him let her go. Kenneth didn’t understand where all these feelings were coming from, or why they were hitting him now, when he could do nothing about it. He only knew that when he realized she knew, his greatest fear wasn’t hanging. Kenneth felt confident he could go to the noose and die like a man, if Amy would just forgive him first. Her disapproval, her disgust, her stony silence, pained him more than anything he had been running from. Kenneth left the rabbits in the small lean-to outside the barn that doubled as a tack room, then checked on the horses. Leon’s horse was sleeping, but his horse was quietly munching on straw, and he shook his head in greeting when he picked up Kenneth’s familiar scent. It would be easy—so 103

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easy—to leave. He knew Leon wouldn’t blame him. It’d be easy to travel east. All the way to Galveston, or New Orleans. From there, he could get passage on a ship. Or maybe he’d go north. It didn’t matter. The important thing was that he could put these five days behind him. But none of that was really a consideration. He couldn’t leave Leon, even if Leon would have forgiven him for it. And he didn’t want to forget Amy. One way or the other, he’d carry her with him for the rest of his life, even if she was just a very fond and distant memory. Kenneth half expected Amy to change her mind, and he wouldn’t have blamed her if she did. He couldn’t even believe she had agreed to meet him in the barn again to begin with. How could he be upset if she came to her senses? But he heard the door open, and then the horses neighed a greeting. The flickering lantern she held cast shadows across her swollen eyes, the only remaining evidence of her crying. Her mouth might have been a little swollen, too, though those origins rested elsewhere. He wanted to kiss her again. Even unsure what her response might be, Kenneth wanted to close the distance between them, take her back into his arms, and finish what they had started at the woodpile. Carefully, Amy shut the door and hung the lantern, its slight sway throwing yellow slivers across the hay. “I’m not sure Leon trusts me alone out here with you. I wasn’t very civil to him today about everything.” “Was he very civil to you?” She shrugged, stepping closer. “He was Leon.” She 104

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paused. “He cares about you, so he was worried about what I thought.” Kenneth couldn’t quite imagine Leon caring about what anybody thought about anything. But he could also get strangely defensive about Kenneth. Whatever words were exchanged, Kenneth wasn’t sorry he’d missed them. He closed the distance between them, but didn’t try to pull her against him again. Instead, he smoothed his palms down her arms. Her coat was warm from her brief trip indoors, and he itched to see if her skin was warmer. “What do you think now?” Her lashes ducked. He itched to tilt her chin back up in order to see what she was thinking. “I’m sorry I didn’t believe you this morning, about the killing thing.” Her soft voice reached into his gut and eased at least one of the knots. “I was upset. And angry. I couldn’t wrap my head around it and realize it’s not in you to do that.” “No, you were right to react that way. You were a lot…kinder than I deserved, given the circumstances.” His fingers tightened on her shoulders, and then she was against him again. She finally looked up, but he couldn’t see her eyes in the barn’s shadows. He couldn’t tell what she was thinking, but she wasn’t trying to push him away. His lips and cheeks tingled in anticipation just before he tilted his head and their mouths met. Amy whimpered, low and haunting, at the first touch of his lips. Hers quivered, and for a moment, he feared that he’d misread her intentions. Perhaps she wasn’t interested in 105

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continuing what they had started, even though it had looked like she was. Then her arms came up. They curled around his shoulders, her hand sliding into the longer locks of hair at his nape, but the press of her body, so tight, so alluring, convinced him more assuredly. There was no denying the slight grind of her hips against his, or the heat soaking through her clothing. Her mouth opened in invitation. That was all he needed. Kenneth didn’t regret that their first time together involved Leon, especially since Leon knew his body so well. But as Amy opened herself to him, he was more than relieved to have her to himself. Relieved that the soft moans coming from her were meant for him only. Relieved that he wasn’t in competition with other hands or another mouth. Without breaking the kiss, he walked backward to the pile of hay. Their mouths came apart momentarily as he sank backward and pulled her with him, but as soon as they were both settled in the hay, Kenneth found her lips again. She didn’t hold anything back from him, didn’t give him any reason to believe she wanted to be anywhere else than with him. One hand slid beneath his jacket, tracing over his chest. Amy sculpted over each muscle, all hesitation gone, but her kisses never stopped, even when she popped the uppermost buttons and slid her fingers inside. He didn’t remember her being so warm. What he did remember was the weight of her stretched out atop him, how much it had made him ache. 106

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This was better. This was all for him. She was his to have, if only for the moment. Her skin was rough, the texture revealing the hours she spent working, and all the effort she put into her household, her son, and even the other members of the community. Each soft touch was a reminder of the strength he had sensed from the first moment he met her. He wanted to feel her entire body above him, or settled beneath him, every inch of her skin touching his. But he didn’t even dare push her coat off her shoulders. It was just a little too chilly in the barn, and the last thing he wanted was to put her health at risk. So Kenneth settled for touching her through her dress, resting one palm over her breast while his other hand massaged her tense neck. “I need you.” Her ragged voice came with Amy pulling abruptly away, shrugging out of her coat at the same time. “All of you.” Amy moved in for another kiss, but he stopped her and gently took the coat from her. He sat up as well and laid the coat out on the hay beside them. He turned them in a single, easy motion, pressing her back to the coat and covering her body. He braced himself on one hand, and opened the buttons on her bodice with the other, eager to touch her and lick the curve of her breast and taste her skin. She arched upward. The hollow of her throat bobbed as she swallowed, captivating Kenneth with the delicacy of her skin. Cupping the back of his head, she pulled him closer to her taut nipple, murmuring encouragement when he circled it 107

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with his tongue. Each texture made his mouth water, until he just had to clamp his mouth over it, sucking it hard against the roof. “Oh, God…” Amy scrabbled at his shirt, tugging it from his waistband. “Please, Kenneth.” Kenneth shivered at the desire in her voice, because it echoed everything he was feeling. It was intoxicating to know that she wanted this as much as he did. Her skin was rough with goose bumps beneath his tongue, but he couldn’t tell if that was from the cold or from the way he touched her. Her nails scraped across his stomach, making him quiver, before her fingers came to rest on his buttons. Kenneth moaned in encouragement and reached for her skirt, tugging it up her legs. He had never been so frustrated by clothing before. It felt like her skirt went on forever, endless folds of fabric before he touched the firm curve of her leg. Amy’s hands were far quicker, and his balls tightened when she found the aching length of his shaft. She stroked him once, twice, a third time in the space it took him to settle her dress around her waist, but it faltered when his long fingers slipped past her folds. She was wet, hot and slick, and she gasped as he pushed inside her clenching channel. “I’m so sorry I didn’t believe you,” she breathed. When he lifted his head, her eyes shone. “So sorry, Kenneth.” Kenneth shook his head. He didn’t need to hear any apologies from her—not when he knew he owed her so many—but he was overwhelmed by the sentiment. And awed 108

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by the grace she offered him. She pulsed around him, her body hot and welcoming. Vibrant in the low, golden light from the lamp. He pulled out so he could have the sharp pleasure of entering her again, reliving the second when she tightened around him and held him. Her legs curled around him, refusing him the freedom to pull away just yet. Clinging to his back, Amy rained kisses over his face, along his jaw, the corner of his mouth, caresses so soft and sweet, they undid more in him than even the tight grip of her channel. Kenneth rested his brow against hers, his eyes squeezed shut. This would be the moment he remembered. All the rest of it could dissolve away, but this would remained etched in his memories until he didn’t have those memories anymore. “I don’t want you to go,” Amy whispered. “I don’t want to lose you.” Kenneth knew he could not stay in Yellow Rock. If Amy had heard they were wanted men, then the marshal looking for them wouldn’t be far behind the whispers. It probably wasn’t safe to stay in the Utah territory at all. “Would you…come with me?” She stilled. When he dared to look at her, her eyes were wide and luminous. “You’d want me and Woody to do that?” Kenneth’s first impulse was to deny it, try to take back his words. Of course, he would never ask her to abandon her home and bring her son with them as they ran from the law. But he wanted her, and he wasn’t going to shy away from the 109

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fact. “I would want you both to be with me.” Amy pulled him back down, tightening her arms and legs to prompt him into moving. Her breath, fervent and quick at his ear, tickled where it rolled down his skin. “We’ll work it out.” A kiss pressed against his neck. “Together.” “Together,” Kenneth echoed, feeling both weakened and strengthened by the promise. He turned his head, seeking out her lips, and once their mouths connected her legs loosened, giving him the space he needed to start moving in slow, shallow strokes. He craved the friction, but he didn’t want to put any space between his body and her warmth. Taking her in the middle of a darkened barn in the dead of winter shouldn’t have been one of the most sensual encounters of his life. Hearing her pant his name shouldn’t have made him crave hearing her scream it. Sliding into her slick depths shouldn’t have left him trembling like it was the first time he had known her heat. Except it was. Did. And this felt more like a first time than sharing her with Leon. Together. That’s what she wanted. Until she’d uttered it aloud, he hadn’t realized how badly he’d fight for it, too. Kenneth slid his mouth away from hers to kiss her cheek, jaw, and brow. Everywhere her skin felt cool to the touch, he caressed until her flesh began to absorb his heat. Every time he closed his eyes, he saw her outlined against the darkness. He knew Leon and Woody were waiting for them. He knew it 110

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was too cold to stay there for long, and even beneath his body, her skin was exposed. But he didn’t want this time with her to end, and he refused to move faster or rush their tempo. Amy was the one who begged for more. Quiet entreaties almost lost in her breathy voice. She scratched at his back, one hand slipping down to cup a buttock, and squirmed each time he completely sheathed himself. Hay caught in her hair, loose strands falling against her neck, and he smoothed it away, covering the skin it exposed with even more kisses. When he felt the quivering overtake her limbs, he sealed their mouths together, stealing the cry he feared she wouldn’t contain. Amy attacked him with teeth and tongue, but he knew it wasn’t fury she unleashed now. It was desire and need and everything he’d been afraid to admit, afraid to wish for. They moved faster together, long shudders wracking Kenneth’s frame with each stroke. Their mouths remained fused together, and he could feel her shaking, trembling as much as he was. He tried to brace himself for what he knew was coming, but he could already sense that this time would be different from their first time together. Because Leon wasn’t there. Because he was already familiar with the way she would flutter and moan around him. Despite his attempt, there was nothing he could do to fully prepare himself for the pleasure that overtook him. He moaned into her mouth, a long, low sound as his prick jerked against her walls, and his heart pounded in his ears. Amy denied him the space to pull away, though abandoning the fiery heat of her body was impossible anyway. 111

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Her muscles continued to oscillate from her release, and her kisses deepened, slowed, until Kenneth almost believed he could start again, and lose himself all over again in the bliss. “This was so much better,” she said. “It doesn’t even compare to before.” “It was.” There wasn’t even a question of agreement. It didn’t compare to anything he had experienced before. “But one day I hope we can do this in a proper bed.” “Tomorrow morning.” Her eyes shone. “After Woody goes to school. We’ll take an hour, just for us.” He hadn’t been angling for a specific time frame, but he was more than happy that she gave him one. He brushed his mouth across hers, a silent expression of everything he was feeling but didn’t know how to articulate. Kenneth hoped she understood. He hoped he could do more to show her. He would do everything he could, anything necessary, to be the man she deserved.

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CHAPTER 8 Leon gave him a knowing smirk when they finally returned to the cabin, but Kenneth ignored him. Especially since he couldn’t stop shivering, the cold finally winding its way around his bones. He pulled the chair close to the fire, wrapped himself in a blanket, and ate Amy’s stew quietly, trying to get his thoughts together. Before he could bring Amy anywhere, he needed to convince Leon that Amy and Woody wouldn’t slow them down or put them at risk. He wasn’t sure what he would do if Leon refused to even consider it. Part ways with Leon? Kenneth couldn’t tolerate that thought. Even for Amy. When Amy ducked into her bedroom, Kenneth wished he 113

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could follow her. He just wanted to hold her, but he suspected the time for that would come. Sooner or later. Once he was alone with Leon, he dragged the chair back to the table so they could talk. Leon’s knowing smirk was back, but Kenneth cut him off before he could say anything. “We need to talk about what we’re going to do.” Leon leaned back in his chair, only cocking a single brow. “Really? ’Cause looks to me, you’ve gone and fixed things back up with our nice widow lady already. So long as you keep her walking funny, we should be good until we’re ready to go.” “How long do you think it’ll be safe to stay here?” Some of the mockery faded. “It’s never been safe, Kenny boy. Just convenient. The sooner we get out of here, the better, so as soon as I can get my foot in my boot without yelling my fool head off…” It could be weeks before that happened. But as long as they kept their heads down and Amy and Woody didn’t give them away, they would have the time. “I don’t want to leave Amy.” Now Leon hardened. “You can’t stay here. You’ll get strung up the first time something goes wrong.” “I know.” Kenneth picked up the piece of wood Leon had been whittling. It had eventually taken shape into a horse. “I don’t want to stay here in Yellow Rock. Too cold for me, anyway. I want her to come with us.” Leon only uttered one word. “No.” 114

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“If we go to California or Oregon and lay low, all of this will blow over.” “Laying low being what’s important. A woman makes us conspicuous.” “No, she makes us look like a family instead of two suspicious outlaws.” His brows shot up. “A woman with two husbands? You got a strange sense of family. Besides, there’s no way she’d leave the kid behind.” Kenneth rolled his eyes. “I didn’t say anything about a woman with two husbands. A woman with one husband and a brother-in-law, or a brother, or an uncle, or a cousin. And I never suggested she leave Woody behind, either.” “Then definitely not. They’ll slow us down. And kids make trouble.” Leon jerked his thumb at the closed curtain. “Especially that one with all his questions.” “They won’t slow us down if we go by train. Woody’s a good kid. He’ll keep his mouth shut if we tell him to. He doesn’t want to cause any problems for his mother.” He sat, poised, waiting for Leon’s next argument. He tried not to fidget when Leon locked his jaw, watching him unblinking for seconds on end. Anything could come out of his mouth now. Anything usually did. “Why is it you want her to come with us?” Leon finally asked. “She’s forgiven you. You can have her as much as you want before we go.” “It’s not about that.” He wanted to marry her. He loved her. But he didn’t think Leon would be swayed by that sort of 115

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argument. Leon wasn’t the sort of man who’d want to settle down. “She wants me to stay here, but we both know I can’t stay in Utah. She wants to be with me.” “Because she’s lonely. I bet if you asked her, she wouldn’t want you to drag her across the country, hiding out from the marshals. Not after the way she reacted to hearing we were wanted.” “I already asked her if she would come with me. She didn’t say no. She didn’t exactly say yes, but she didn’t say no.” “But she didn’t say yes, either. She probably didn’t want to hurt your feelings.” “She wouldn’t put my feelings before the welfare of her son. If she didn’t want to leave with us, she would have said so. Besides, there’s nothing keeping her here. She doesn’t like Yellow Rock. She’s got no family here.” Leon sighed and plucked the wood out of Kenneth’s hands, reaching for his knife with the other. “Something tells me you’re going to be stubborn about this,” he said, shaving away fresh slivers from the horse’s hindquarters. “I am going to be stubborn about this. I don’t want to put anybody at risk, especially not my own neck. But I’ve been thinking about this all night, and I’m sure we can get somewhere safe.” “What happens when you’re tired of her in six months? Or when you find another girl to moon after?” Leon shook his head. “You’re not thinking straight, Kenneth. You’ve let the fact that she’s pretty and is taking care of us go to your head.” 116

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“When was the last time I found a girl to moon after?” Kenneth asked softly. Leon scowled. “That’s not the point.” “Yes, it is. You’re telling me I’m going to get tired of her or get distracted. Now you need to tell me the last time I tired of somebody I cared about or was distracted by a pretty face.” He looked down at the wood in his hands, turning it over to work over a different section. “You make it sound like it’s more than the coupling.” His voice sounded different. Distant. Too controlled. “Is it?” Leon wouldn’t like to hear this, but Kenneth wouldn’t lie to him either. “It is. Much more than that.” A log fell in the fireplace, sparks crackling as the flames danced for a moment to adjust to the new arrangement before settling again. The steady scrape of Leon’s knife over the wood had always been a comforting sound to Kenneth, something soothing he’d fallen asleep to more than once under the stars. Now, it abraded his nerves, a reminder that Leon had yet to agree to his wishes. “Say we do it.” Leon still wasn’t looking up. “Say we take the pair of ’em with us. You planning on settling down wherever we land? I can’t see her bein’ too happy about you and me robbing coaches anymore.” “No, we’d have to stop. But is that really a big deal? You didn’t want to spend the rest of your life robbing coaches, did you? We’ve still got money hidden away. And there’s plenty of opportunity in California for a man who’s willing to work. I know we have enough from the last hold-up to get settled on a 117

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good piece of land.” Leon shrugged. “Just never really saw us stopping anytime soon, is all.” He paused. “There was nothing wrong with the lives we had.” “No, there wasn’t. I was happy with the lives we had. I’m not saying I wasn’t. But I look at Amy and…I want to take care of her.” Leon looked less than happy about the admission, but at least he wasn’t yelling or calling Amy less than favorable names or something that would only anger Kenneth in the long run. After a moment, he set the tools down and reached for his drink, taking a long swallow before finally meeting Kenneth’s eyes again. “I s’pose that means you won’t need my help relieving your itches,” he drawled. Kenneth frowned. “No, I guess I won’t. And I don’t think that Amy…would be interested in your help again.” Leon waved him off. “Never underestimate the appeal of my charm.” “I wouldn’t do that.” Kenneth’s frown turned to a small grin. “Especially since I’ve seen more than one person give in to your charms.” “I guess there’s one bright spot in all this.” Now Leon smiled. “I don’t have to put up with your pathetic cooking anymore.” “Nope, you just have to put up with my pathetic attempts at hunting.” Kenneth’s smile matched Leon’s, and he relaxed against the back of his chair. That had been easier than he 118

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thought, though he knew talking to Leon wasn’t the hard part. Getting everybody out of Yellow Rock and safely settled in California wasn’t even the hard part. Waiting for Amy’s definitive answer was the hard part. *

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Though they settled into a familiar routine, Amy never spoke to Kenneth about the events of the barn. She wasn’t so sure what she’d say. She wasn’t even sure what she wanted. She only knew that she was happier than she had been in a very long time, even with the specter of the marshal hanging unseen over their heads. Kenneth was sweet and attentive, there to help her whenever she needed, finding every opportunity he could to steal a touch or a kiss or fifteen minutes stretched out beside her on her bed, whispering endearments while his hands explored. Even Leon was surprisingly easy-natured, though his gregariousness didn’t nearly match what it had been prior to her discovering the truth. But it was enough to convince Amy that she had done the right thing. It was all right to trust them. They had no interest in hurting her or Woody, and as far as she could tell, Kenneth was holding to his word about being honest. That made thinking about what they’d said in the barn even harder. She had told Kenneth they would work things out together. He expected her to leave with them when the time came. Could she do it? Maybe the better question was, could she go back to a life without him in it? 119

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If she had to, Amy knew that she could. But the cold fist that wrapped around her heart at the prospect left her little doubt about how she would feel if that was her only alternative. Testing Woody on the matter didn’t help at all. At her carefully worded question about how he felt about Kenneth, her son immediately brightened. All he could talk about was all the things Kenneth was doing for him, things his father would have done if he’d lived. He even expressed interest in knowing what Kenneth’s home and family were like. He never did that with her own family. Or Ernest’s. That told Amy all she needed to know. It took eight days for her to work up her courage, and even then she waited until Leon had drifted asleep before slipping out of bed and into the warmer main room. As soon as Kenneth saw her, he untangled himself from the makeshift bed on the floor and stood without disturbing Leon. “I thought you were asleep.” His hair was mussed, and his mouth soft, drawing her forward in order to touch him. It still amazed her that she could. This beautiful young man didn’t see her as a decrepit widow but as a woman. He never looked at her with anything less than the appreciation that now gleamed in his eyes. It was impossible not to graze her fingertips over any inch of him available. “I wanted to talk.” Though she kept her voice low, she cast a surreptitious glance at Leon to see if he was stirring. She 120

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took Kenneth’s hand and led him to the table. “I wanted a little privacy.” “Just talk quietly, and you probably won’t disturb him.” Kenneth settled in his usual chair, but instead of releasing her so she could sit, he pulled her onto his lap. “There, now you can whisper in my ear.” Amy didn’t know how being in this position would make talking any easier. His now familiar body pressed into hers in all the best places, especially when she coiled her arm around his shoulders and leaned in. But she took a deep breath anyway, subduing the rising desire in her veins. “We’ve never talked about that day in the barn,” she said softly. “I think it’s time we do.” “I was hoping it would be that time soon.” He began rubbing her arm in a slow caress, his fingers moving from her elbow to her wrist and back again. “You mean the part where I asked you to come with us, right?” “Yeah.” She took a deep breath. “I know we were both upset that day. A lot was going on, and we probably said some things we didn’t necessarily mean. So if you changed your mind about that, I’ll understand. But I just have to know.” “I never changed my mind.” He kissed the corner of her jaw, near her ear. “I never would. I even talked to Leon about it and told him that I wanted to be with you.” She pulled back in order to both look at him more directly and to clear her head from the distraction his kisses created. “You did that? What did he say?” “He argued with me for awhile. And then he…accepted 121

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that I wanted you and Woody to be a part of my life.” Her throat tightened. “Woody adores you, you know. You’re all he talks about.” “What about his mother?” Amy bent her head close to his again, skimming her mouth down his neck. “Maybe she doesn’t talk about you all the time, but she definitely thinks about you that much. More.” Kenneth sighed softly and tilted his head. Once she started kissing him, she didn’t really want to stop. She had the feeling Kenneth didn’t want to stop her, either. “That’s fair, because I think about his mother constantly.” Tiny shivers ran down her spine. “I still wish we could stay here and have a life together,” she confessed. “But I know we can’t. Even if you weren’t wanted, I don’t think people here would take too kindly to us being together.” “Have you ever been to California?” “No. Is that where you’re thinking of going?” “Yes. I was thinking we could go to the Salinas Valley. We could get a plot of land, or I could find work on one of the ranches. I figure it’ll be like heaven, compared to this place.” “Oh, I don’t know. The past couple weeks have been pretty close to heaven for me.” “A warmer piece of heaven, then. With less snow.” Kenneth cupped the side of her face. “Does this mean you’ll come with us?” This was it. She had to make a choice. But looking into his soft eyes, with his callused fingertips stroking her skin, there was really only one thing she could say. 122

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“I promised we’d work on this together. And together doesn’t work if we’re in different states. So, yes, if you’ll have us.” The corner of her mouth lifted. “And you don’t mind people thinking you’re stuck with a woman old enough to be your mother.” “I don’t care what anybody thinks. You’re the finest woman I’ve ever met, and if anybody thinks anything, it should be that I’m a fortunate man to have you.” “We’re both fortunate.” Her fingers touched his mouth, so wide and generous. Every worry she’d had, every fear, dissipated when she looked at him like this. “I couldn’t have fallen in love with a better man.” His face transformed. She had seen him smile before, but never like this. Maybe the difference was that she had never seen him this happy. “I’ve fallen in love with you, too. I never thought I’d meet anybody like you.” Hearing him say the words shouldn’t have made her so lightheaded, but it did. Amy felt like she could float right out of his lap, if it weren’t for his strong arms holding her down. The fact that he was considering a future for them, one away from the life he’d known, was almost inconsequential next to uttering his declaration. He loved her. That was all she needed. Her mouth met his, unable to stay away. Kenneth opened to her questing tongue immediately, but in spite of her desire for privacy, Amy moaned at the very first contact. Kenneth cupped the back of her head, holding her as his tongue pushed deeper into her mouth. He kissed her like the 123

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last time he touched her was in the barn. Like they were the only two people in the small cabin. The pressure of his lips intoxicated her, and his length pressed against her thigh, an undeniable reminder of what they both wanted. It was a risk with Woody in the next room and Leon asleep on the floor, but Amy didn’t care. Her skin was tight, her body aching. All she wanted was to feel Kenneth inside her, hear his endearments in the full knowledge of his feelings. Dropping her hand to her leg, Amy hiked her nightdress up to her waist, shifting in his lap until she straddled his erection. She broke away from his mouth panting, and swallowed in order to find her voice. “I need you,” she whispered. “Make love to me.” Kenneth reached between their bodies to unbutton the fly on his long underwear. The tip of his prick brushed against her swollen flesh. The simple connection of flesh touching flesh was enough to make her shudder. What was left of her hesitation simply fluttered away, and her muscles clenched in anticipation of feeling him. “Love you,” he whispered again as he slid into her, their bodies joining like nothing had ever separated them. Amy held him inside, clinging to his strong body. Hers. He was hers. It would take some doing, and it might not be easy, but certainly the hardest part was finding someone to trust, someone willing to take the same risks, someone willing to work as hard. “I love you, too.” She began the long, slow slide back up his length, trembling the entire way. 124

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Leaving Yellow Rock would be a beginning, too. But with Kenneth at her side, it would be worth it.

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JAMIE CRAIG

Jamie Craig is the collaborative efforts of Pepper Espinoza and Vivien Dean. Both successful authors on their own, they began working together in early 2006. Pepper lives with her husband and cats in Utah, where she attends graduate school, and Vivien resides in northern California with her husband and two children. *

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Don’t miss His Very Own, by Jamie Craig, available at AmberHeat.com!

Adam Roper packs his car and leaves his home in New York City to start a new life in Miami, Florida. After a full day of driving, he stops in a small town to buy food at the local grocery store. He offers to help an old woman with her groceries, and before he knows it, he’s eating dinner at her home with her son and his wife, the two most attractive people Adam has ever met—Scott Emerson and his wife, Sasha. Scott and Sasha once ran wild together, but settled down when they had their daughter, Colette. Now Sasha works as the town’s only doctor, and Scott spends his days raising Colette and struggling to write. Both of them long for a taste of their

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