Red Silk Diaries Vol.1

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Marissa de A’mor, Tracy Cole, Amethyst Knighte, Rene Walden

Red Silk Diaries, Volume 1

Silk’s Vault Proudly Presents...

The Red Silk Diaries, Volume 1 By Featured Authors: Marissa de A’mor Tracy Cole Amethyst Knighte Rene Walden

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Marissa de A’mor, Tracy Cole, Amethyst Knighte, Rene Walden

Red Silk Diaries, Volume 1

A Silk’s Vault Electronic Publication, in arrangement with authors: Marissa de A’mor, Tracy Cole, Amethyst Knighte and Rene Walden. After Hours Cocktails, Copyrighted © 2005 by Marissa de A’mor Turnabout, Copyrighted © 2005 by Tracy Cole Journals of Innocence Lost, Copyrighted © 2005 by Amethyst Knighte All in a Day’s Work, Copyrighted © 2005 by Rene Walden Cover Design and Art by Marianne LaCroix, © Copyright 2005 Edited by Carol Fortado and Rene Walden

Layout and Formatting Provided by: Carmel St. James

Silk’s Vault Publishing www.silksvault.com All Rights Reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in part or whole, in any form or by any means, without permission from both the author and publisher. All characters, incidents, situations, institutions, governments and people are fictional and any similarity to characters or persons living or dead is strictly coincidental.

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Marissa de A’mor, Tracy Cole, Amethyst Knighte, Rene Walden

Red Silk Diaries, Volume 1

After Hours Cocktails By Marissa de A’mor

January 5th, 2005

Well, they hired that cute guy today for the supervisor position in the Kevlar and armoring section of the factory. Yeah, I know I recommended him to Frank, but there was something annoying about the guy. He was kinda pushy. You know the type, always coming around to see if the position was filled yet. It was driving me batty. I hate to be bothered like that, but whatever. I just hope I don’t live to regret that one. Not much I can do about it now though. His resume was pretty impressive and he was able to carry an intelligent conversation. I suppose as long as he does his job and stays outta my way, we’ll be fine. Oh, I suppose a little more detail is in order. It’s been years since I’ve kept a journal or diary, but writing clears my head and relaxes me. Anyway, this new guy, Brett McMillan, he seems ok. He was persistent and I guess that’s what bugged me. I don’t like to be chased down and bothered when I’m trying to get us hired up to cover all the new government contracts we just got in. Oh well, what’s done is done. The big guy loved him and that was all there was to it. Damn, I got sidetracked again. I tend to ramble, even on paper apparently. Boy this journal is gonna be interesting. I was gonna tell you about this Brett guy. As annoying as he seemed he would be, there was something kinda cute about him. As the Director of Human Resources and Payroll I shouldn’t have noticed that kinda thing, but hell, I’m not dead. I notice hot guys, even at work, but it’s look and don’t touch. Oh, by the way, there aren’t that many hot guys either. Brett is the first worth mentioning. Brett McMillan is the bad boy gone businessman. He has his head shaved and sports a perfectly trimmed goatee. It looks as though he keeps himself in pretty good shape. Other than that I know nothing else. I’m just waiting to see what happens next.

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Marissa de A’mor, Tracy Cole, Amethyst Knighte, Rene Walden

Red Silk Diaries, Volume 1

Don’t get me wrong, he’s definitely qualified. I guess I’m just pissy that he’s so damn cute. Being HR in this case is gonna be a pain in the ass. Ok, enough of the rambling, I have work to finish.

February 19th, 2005

Yeah, yeah, I know. I have to get used to this regular journal writing thing. I’ve been way too swamped at work to think about it. We’ve been hiring people for the factory like crazy. It’s been unreal. We have government contracts coming out our asses and not enough people to produce the bullet proof vests and armor the helicopters or cars. The upside is I’ve had to work almost on a daily basis with Brett. Yes, you read correctly. Yeah, I know what I said last month. Things change. Lemme explain. When Brett took over as supervisor, a lot of the...how should I put this? Spanish speakers got a little upset because they couldn’t communicate with him. Personally, I think they had it way too easy before, and when they saw they had to do some actual manual labor they booked it outta there. So, right away he needed my help with translating for those who stayed and to fill all the open slots. It’s not easy to find good

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Marissa de A’mor, Tracy Cole, Amethyst Knighte, Rene Walden

Red Silk Diaries, Volume 1

workers who aren’t afraid to get their hands dirty and work their tails off. I tended to be in Brett’s office more than I was in my own. There were constant issues and questions with the employees who stayed, and there were endless interviews that he wanted to be a part of. It made sense for him to be there because the employees are for his department. Long story short...I found out he’s actually a pretty nice guy; and he’s funny too. His subtle southern accent and deep voice drive me mad, but in a good way. That in itself is a little scary for me. I’ve never cared for the accent, but he makes it kinda sexy. Then there’s that crooked smile he gets when he wants something. I could go on and on. As a matter of fact, there was one time in particular that is embedded in my mind. One day we met in the break room for lunch and we were the only ones in there because it was later than usual. I had brought my lunch and popped it into the microwave. Leftovers are great when you’re hungry. The food heated while we talked and I washed my hands. The microwave finished before me so Brett got up, took my food out, and placed it on the table with my silverware and napkin. Then he moved the chair that was at the end of the table and placed it next to his. No one had ever done that for me before. Then, get this; I dug through my wallet for change for the soda machine. He took the change from me, got my Dr. Pepper, opened it, and put it in front of my food on the table. Who the hell does all that? Certainly no one I’ve ever known. Needless to say, he hooked me good. I catch myself watching him in the factory through the window in his office. I really have to get all these positions filled so I can get back to the main building. I can sense the danger already. It blares in my ears, ‘Danger, Will Robinson, danger!’ I swear everyone around me can hear it too.

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Marissa de A’mor, Tracy Cole, Amethyst Knighte, Rene Walden

Red Silk Diaries, Volume 1

March 1, 2005

Shit! Didn’t I tell you danger was lurking? This whole Brett situation has taken quite a turn. I’m not complaining really, but it’s not a good thing either. I’ve gone from me not liking him too much, to becoming friends. Now it took another step. It’s crossed the line and moved over to flirting. It happens. Sometimes it’s even unintentional. I know I’m a big flirt without even trying or thinking about it. It just comes out that way. I don’t do it on purpose. The good part is, I know it’s not just me with a silly case of infatuation. The flirting is very mutual. I even have the perfect example. Did you doubt I would? My name is no longer Marissa. He calls me babe, baby or my love. I freakin’ melt like butter every damn time. I can’t even begin to explain it. I even get that goofy grin when I see him walk in the building in the mornings and my heart pounds almost out of my chest. None of this has ever happened to me before. It’s scary and exciting all at the same time. I just dunno how all this is supposed to work out. I mean, who makes what move, and are we even supposed to be thinking that way. In a way, I’m his superior, and I’m freakin’ Human Resources for God’s sake. This is just insane. Ok, that may not be a good enough example, and I’ve started rambling again. How about that low groan he lets out when he sees me. That shit drives me nuts. Just yesterday, I wore a low cut camisole type top with my black skirt. I saw him in the break room getting coffee. I needed some too so it’s not like I walked in there just to see him. He turned around when he heard the door. I smiled and said my usual, “Mornin’ sunshine.” In exchange I got that sexy grin with a groan. “You look good, babe. That color is definitely you.” Somehow I didn’t believe he was talking about the color of my top since he was staring at my cleavage. Not completely my fault I wore a push up bra with that particular top. Ok, maybe it was a little planned, but still. It took all I had to keep from giggling like a fucking school girl. I hate how that man gives me massive butterflies, and send shivers down my spine. “Thanks,” was all I could muster without completely embarrassing myself.

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Marissa de A’mor, Tracy Cole, Amethyst Knighte, Rene Walden

Red Silk Diaries, Volume 1

“Babe, could you come by my office later so I can give you that final list of the people I wanna hire?” He took a sip of his coffee, but never took his eyes off me. “Nope.” The shock on his face was priceless. I purposely brushed up against him as I walked past to get myself some coffee too. I know it was evil, but I couldn’t help it. I heard him groan while I poured. I swear I nearly dropped the pot. “You can bring it by my office. Oh, and can you be sure I got all my files out of your office too?” “Sure, my love, anything else?” he bowed like he was glad to get the order. It was too cute. I wanted to say, ‘yeah, could you shove your tongue down my throat and feel me up right here?’ but it sounded more like, “No, sweetie, that’ll do it.” I gave him a wink, smiled and walked out. I know my limits. If I had hung around, I would have grabbed him and kissed him myself. I’ve been wanting to do that for days now. He just looks so freakin kissable. Damn him.

March 16, 2005 Ok, I’ve determined that I can’t remember to write in this thing everyday, so I’ll just fill in the blanks as I can. I have too much on my mind to keep writing in this journal on a daily basis. Yeah, I know, I’m rambling and blubbering again. Geez this sucks. All right, on to the matter at hand. Can you guess what the topic will be? Ding, ding, ding…you guessed correctly. It’ll be about freakin’ Brett McMillan again. Oh, how I wish I could hate this man.

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Marissa de A’mor, Tracy Cole, Amethyst Knighte, Rene Walden

Red Silk Diaries, Volume 1

I know I am going to get myself into a shit load of trouble if word ever got out that I was flirting with an employee. Here I am, supposed to be upholding the policies and procedures, but instead I’m breaking them. I blame Brett and his damn smile. The ‘flirting’ has gotten much more intense in the past few days. I dunno why it suddenly became that way, but there it is. Don’t get me wrong, I love all the attention, but it just seems so sudden. As a matter of fact, he confirmed that I’m not crazy and that he likes me, too. He constantly feels the need to whisper in my ear. Not just hello, either. He tells me how his mouth waters when he sees me in a skirt because he’s wondering what I’m wearing underneath. Some may find that perverted and gross, I find it sexy as hell. It takes a real man to tell it like it is and not be afraid to tell you what he’s thinking. Of course, that’s just my opinion. I may have to admit that the sound of his voice so close to me makes me wet, but I ain’t that brave yet. Another time perhaps, but not today.

April 2, 2005 OH MY GOD!! You are not going to believe this. I mean, shit, I barely believe it and I’m living it. I guess I should tell you the whole story. Whew, I hope I can retell it to sound as good as it actually was. My heart hasn’t stopped racing yet. Ok, ok, I’ll tell you already. Sheesh. I had to work late tonight. There were a lot of phone calls to be made and I had to catch up on my filing. I can’t stand to work in disorganization. It’s my pet peeve and I can be pretty anal about it. Anyway, by the time I left it was dark out. I walked down the hall and got in the elevator. When I stepped into the lobby and walked toward the parking garage, who do you think was going in the same direction? You guessed it. Mr. McMillan had worked late, too. Here’s the clincher though. He wasn’t wearing his nice slacks and dress shirt. No, no, no. He was wearing jeans and a t-shirt. Why? Because he was helping with some Kevlar vests and didn’t want to ruin his clothes. He kills me.

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Marissa de A’mor, Tracy Cole, Amethyst Knighte, Rene Walden

Red Silk Diaries, Volume 1

He caught up to me and put his hand at my lower back. I swear it burned right through me. “Why are you here so late, baby?” The melting butter thing happened before I answered. “I had some work to finish. What’s your excuse?” “Same thing,” he flashed me that sexy smile. “Can I walk you to your car? It’s pretty dark out there tonight.” My head was screaming, ‘take me now’, but my mouth wasn’t listening. “That would be so nice of you.” I gave him a sheepish smile and we walked out together. Mind you, his hand was still at the small of my back. Not that it bothered me, but thank goodness there was no one around to see it. Not that I usually care what people think, but this is my job we’re talking about. Something like this would spread like wildfire. We walked out to the garage and of course it was empty. I didn’t even see his car. As a matter of fact, I have no clue what he drives. Not that it matters, I was just curious. Walking toward my car, he hooked his thumb in the waistband of my skirt. I swear I thought I was gonna stop breathing. The garage is very dimly lit and with my Jell-o legs I thought I was going to trip over myself. “Nice mustang, babe,’ he said as he tried to peek in the windows to get a look at the interior of my new baby. “Did you wanna take a look inside?” I tried not to laugh, but a giggle escaped. “Lemme open the door.” He moved aside and stared at me with that sexy grin of his. God, how it kills me. I opened the door and he practically jumped in. “Mmm, these seats feel great.” He rubbed the leather and groaned again. He got out of the car, shut the door, and leaned up against the car. Folding his arms across his chest, he gave me that penetrating stare again. “I’ve missed you today.” Holy shit, was he kidding me? “I’ve been here all day.” “But I was too wrapped up in the factory to see you. We can’t let that happen again.” He reached out and took my hands in his, pulling me a little closer to him. I was so right about the rough, working man hands. I was caught a little off guard by his words and advances, but I was so ready for whatever he had. “Well then, maybe

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Marissa de A’mor, Tracy Cole, Amethyst Knighte, Rene Walden

Red Silk Diaries, Volume 1

you need to be sure you find me next time. I’m always in the building somewhere.” He gave a soft groan, “But I have you here now. No one to keep me from telling you or showing you that I needed to see you.” “Showing me?” My heart leapt to my throat at the thought of him showing me anything. “Mmm hmm.” He pulled me to him and wrapped his arms around my waist, our noses touching as his smile faded. His eyes were more intense as they stared into mine. I swear I could have lost myself in them. Turning his head slightly to one side, he moved his lips toward mine. His soft lips teased mine, coaxing them to open. I hesitated at first, unsure. The doubts quickly disappeared and I let him kiss me. Let me tell you, it was the softest, most sensual kiss I had ever had. He wasn’t one of these guys that just shove their tongues in your mouth and make a mess. Oh no, no, no. He lingered on my lips, nipping and sucking, easing his tongue little by little. His hands squeezed me into him, all our curves perfectly fitting into each other. “You’re shaking,” he whispered into my lips. “Why? Are you nervous?” I thought about it for a split second. It wasn’t nerves. “No, I’m not nervous.” He pulled away a little to look into my eyes. “Then what is it?” Shit, he wanted to know. For some reason, I felt so comfortable with him. Like I could say anything and we could talk about anything. It’s a strange sensation, but I really like that about us. “It’s you. You give me shivers and do things to me I can’t even explain.” “Mmm, now that is a great answer. No one has ever said that to me before.” He pulled me in again and kissed me some more. I felt like I was floating. His strong arms caressed and enveloped me into his chest. I could have stayed there with him for hours. To me, there is nothing better than a guy who knows how to kiss a woman. He was amazing, but unfortunately the moment would have to end. I reluctantly pulled away from him, not really wanting to let go of his tender lips. “I should get going. It’s late and I have to be here early for a meeting tomorrow.” You should have seen the look of disappointment and need in his eyes. He looked like a lost

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Marissa de A’mor, Tracy Cole, Amethyst Knighte, Rene Walden

Red Silk Diaries, Volume 1

puppy, and all I wanted to do was put him in my car and take him home. Good lord he drives me crazy. “Are you sure you have to leave so soon?” He squeezed me tighter. It felt so good to be wrapped in his arms. I could feel his every muscle reacting to the heat of our bodies. My body screamed out, ‘no, I can stay as long as you want’, but again my mouth wasn’t listening. “Unfortunately, I do, but I’ll see you tomorrow.” “Mmm, I suppose.” He reluctantly let go of me. I didn’t want him to either, but I would never have been able to leave if he tried to kiss me again. The man is intoxicating. I looked around the garage, “Where’s your car?” “On the next level,” he smiled as he moved a stray strand of hair behind my ear. “Do you need a ride to your car? I don’t mind taking you.” Honestly, I just wanted a few more minutes with him. He looked and smelled too good to just let him walk away. He rumbled another groan, “Baby, if I get in that car I’m not getting out till you take me home with you.” ‘Take him home, Marissa, take him home!’ The voice in my head was in overdrive. It was my turn to groan at that. “I see what you mean.” I bit my lower lip to keep myself from convincing him to get in my car. “I guess I’ll see you tomorrow then?” “Try and stop me.” He leaned in and gave me a soft peck on the lips, then walked back to the elevator. I watched him go, admiring how his pants looked loosely wrapped around his perfect ass. There is nothing like a nice ass in baggy pants. God bless that man. So, you see how this is turning into a whole new adventure? I’m not complaining about the turn it has taken, but I’m a little scared as to where it can lead. I don’t want to fall too hard for him and I definitely don’t wanna land on my face if it all crashes around me.

April 16, 2005

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Marissa de A’mor, Tracy Cole, Amethyst Knighte, Rene Walden

Red Silk Diaries, Volume 1

Ok, the whole point of laying here with this book is to tell you about the amazing day I had yesterday. Man, what a day it was. Let’s try to capture all this from the beginning… I was sitting in my office going over all the time sheets so I could get the weekly payroll entered into the system and I was also on the phone with our group health insurance agent at the same time. The company I work for has me doing the job of two people. No big deal really, since they kinda go together. Anyway, I was on the phone when I heard a tap on my door. I looked up to find myself staring into the sexiest smile I had ever seen. Good thing I was sitting down cuz Brett always made my legs wobbly, and I probably soaked through my panties in the process, too. I hate that he has that power over me, but there it is. I waved him in and pointed to a chair. I ain’t stupid, I wasn’t gonna let him leave just cuz I was on the phone. That would have been rude. Besides, he looks so much better close up. He was wearing khakis and a royal blue dress shirt that brought out the blue in his eyes. He didn’t have on a tie and the first two buttons of the shirt were undone. I smiled at him and tried my best to end my phone conversation without staring at his crotch as he moved to sit in the chair in front of me. Finally, I was able to hang up and give Brett my full attention. Yeah, ok, he had it from the moment he walked in, but I was trying not to make it too obvious. There were people walking past my door so it would have been easy for them to see me. “What can I do for ya, darlin’?” I know I’m HR and all that crap, but what’s a little harmless flirting? I mean honestly, the rules about sexual harassment are a bit exaggerated if you ask me. Unwelcome advances are one thing, but if it's a mutual interest between two consenting adults, who gives a shit. There’s never been anything wrong with a little fun amongst friends. “I was wondering if I could have a few minutes of your time today. I have some questions about the deductions on my paycheck.” He flashed that smile again and winked. Good Lord, he was killing me. After the parking garage incident a few days ago I couldn’t get his face out of my head. It was driving me nuts. The feel of his lips on mine still

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Marissa de A’mor, Tracy Cole, Amethyst Knighte, Rene Walden

Red Silk Diaries, Volume 1

lingered. “I have time now if you want.” Shit, if he wants I’ll hump him right here and now. No, I didn’t say it out loud. I’m stupid, but not that stupid. He looked at his watch. “Actually, babe, I have a meeting in a few minutes. What about this afternoon?” I had to shake my head at him because he had the memory of a peanut, bless his heart. “Umm, aren’t you going to be at the supervisor’s meeting I’m conducting to implement the new payroll rules and structures?” He smacked his head, “Damn, you’re right. Well, if you don’t mind, I have to work late. Can I bother you later this evening, or do you need to leave in a hurry again?” And there it was…that damned smile again. I actually wished he would stop cuz it was doing a new number on my panties. “Funny you should mention that. It just so happens I need to get payroll finished, so I’ll be here late again tonight.” Be still my heart. “Stop by whenever.” He got up and left my office, leaving me to think about what I had just said. What the hell was I thinking? Brett McMillan, alone with me in my office after hours; it was insanity. Danger, Will Robinson, danger! Well, crap, there was no turning back now. Not that I wanted to take any of it back. I’ve wanted to kiss that man again since the moment I pulled out of the parking lot that night. When I arrived at the afternoon meeting, all the supervisors were already there. For a split second I had forgotten Brett was gong to be there. I say split second because as soon as I set my things down at the head of the huge conference table, there he was, staring at me. No, not from across the table, he had gotten the chair right next to mine. I dunno how he did that. It was a prime spot. What did he do, get here before everyone else? My heart almost jumped out of my chest it was pounding so damn hard. Now I had to give this presentation and give out new rules with him sitting there next to me. Those eyes were burning a hole through me. I composed myself as best I could and got the meeting under way. I tried to look at everyone so no one felt excluded, but I swear, every time I looked at Brett he smiled and winked at me. He had turned his chair so his back was to everyone else, so no one could

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Marissa de A’mor, Tracy Cole, Amethyst Knighte, Rene Walden

Red Silk Diaries, Volume 1

see him do it but me. How I didn’t pass out, I still don’t know. All the while I pictured him in my head. It kinda relaxed me as I spoke. I hated running meetings so I need distractions to keep my mind off my nerves. So anyway, I kept picturing him in my head. The first day we met…how rough his hands were. I pictured the kiss in the parking garage, the feel of his soft lips on mine, his roaming hands. It all bombarded me at once. No matter what, he’s always dressed to kill. Never a wrinkle in his clothes and always well groomed. He’s no Brad Pitt, but God help me there’s something about him that makes me horny as hell. Don’t get me wrong, he’s very cute, in a gringo sorta way. I love his look--its bad boy mixed with business man. If he tells me he has a Harley and a tattoo, I’m done for. Ok, I’m rambling again. The meeting continued the same way throughout. He kept smiling and winking, and I tried to keep my cool. The man was blatantly flirting with me in the conference room. I loved every minute of it, though. How could I not? Geez, let’s fast forward all this. I’m even getting bored with it. Five o’clock rolled around and the building began to empty. No one cares to stay at work longer than they need to. Well, no one but us dummies who procrastinate our workload. I figured I might as well pretend to do some work. Oh, did I forget to mention that I really didn’t need to stay late? I kinda sorta lied so Brett would come back to my office to talk to me. Pretty sad, ain’t it. Anything to get a few minutes alone with him was well worth the effort. At six on the dot, Brett peeked into my office. “Hey, babe, can you take a break?” He flashed his sexy little smile as he spoke. “Uh huh, sure.” My thought process for coherent grown up words had disappeared. “Come on in and have a seat.” He had his hand behind his back like he was hiding something. Holy shit, he shut the door behind him. “I brought us these.” He reached out to me with a bottle of beer. That was definitely all I needed now. I could see the company newsletter. Hussy Director of HR gets drunk in her office with factory supervisor. I’ll say it again, I’ve never given a shit what people think or say about me. They don’t pay my bills so I never worry or give a second thought to what might be said, but if it can ruin my career I have to worry a little.

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Red Silk Diaries, Volume 1

I smiled at him, “You’re a life saver. I needed one of these after that awful meeting this afternoon.” “I think you did great, babe.” There was that pet name again. I was beginning to like it a little too much. Actually, I wanted to hear him whisper it in my ear, or better yet, scream it out in the heat of passion. God, I bet he would sound hot doing it, too. That deep voice just dripping with a subtle southern drawl... Damn it, I’m getting off track again. He sat in the chair across from me and popped open our beer bottles. “I just have a few questions for ya about my check and the insurance.” He bit his lower lip when he paused. I had to laugh because I was beginning to see he was making excuses to get me alone. I felt like such a dork. I should have seen it coming. I played along with him, though, cuz I wanted to see where he was gonna go with it. Plus, it was good to know he wanted time with me as much as I wanted time with him. “Brett, you’ve been here for four months. Why didn’t you ask about all that before?” He paused and stared at me. I got lost in those blue pools of his. He licked his lips before he answered. “I never really thought about it before now.” “Mmm hmm.” I took a long swig of my beer. I needed the courage to draw out of him what I wanted to hear. “I think you’re lying.” Brett’s eyes opened wide and that devilish smile spread across his face. He knew he was caught. Damn, he was sexy as hell when he did that. He unbuttoned the sleeves of his shirt and rolled them up. I had to catch my breath when he did. The man had a tattoo of a dragon on his inner right forearm. That was it. I was doomed. I looked right at him and in all seriousness asked, “Do you have a Harley?” Hey, don’t laugh, I needed to know. Brett chuckled and leaned forward on my desk. I saw the gleam in his eye as a smirk curled across his lips. “Would you want me if I said I do?” Holy shit, that was it. He had crossed the line and there was no turning back. It was exactly what I wanted, but now I was scared to say what I really felt. Say something, Marissa, I screamed to myself. I couldn’t breathe, but I had to say something. It was now

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Marissa de A’mor, Tracy Cole, Amethyst Knighte, Rene Walden

Red Silk Diaries, Volume 1

or never, so I took the plunge with my eyes wide open. I leaned forward in my chair, moving my face only inches from his. I could feel his warm breath against my lips. My heart pounded in my chest and my nipples hardened with anticipation. “I want you whether you do or not.” I bit my lower lip. I wanted him so bad right then I could taste it. “Babe, this could be dangerous, ya know.” He reached over and caressed my cheek with his thumb. Brett’s touch was electrifying. Oh I knew it could be. Did I back down? Hell no. I wanted him to fuck my brains out. Why would I back out now that I was so close to getting a little action? Without missing a beat, I walked over to the door and locked it, closing the blinds to the window that led to the hallway on my way back over. There was no need for anyone to see what I was about to do to that man. Even though the employees were gone, the cleaning crew was probably already in the building. I walked back over to my desk and sat on the edge in front of him. “I kinda like dangerous.” The room had suddenly gotten warmer. I was sure glad I didn’t wear pantyhose with my short business skirt. I had kicked my shoes off under the desk while I was working earlier and they were still there. I spread my bare legs out in front of him. I was on a roll so I leaned back a little and unfastened an extra button on my blouse. I was tired of being coy. I desperately wanted him. There was a low rumble in his throat while he watched. The poor guy couldn’t keep his eyes off me. I thought they were gonna come out of their sockets for a minute there. Without a word, he reached out and touched my calf with his rough hand. It felt like an electrical shock as he slid the hand slowly up to my inner thigh. All the flirting we had been doing was definitely paying off now. “Mmm, are your legs always this soft and smooth?” There was a growl to his voice. Like his animal instincts were taking over. I liked it. I really liked it. “I shaved last night.” I couldn’t believe I blurted that out, but his touch was driving me to the brink of insanity. Those rough hands on my soft skin were shooting ungodly tingles that stopped right at my pulsing… well, you know.

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Marissa de A’mor, Tracy Cole, Amethyst Knighte, Rene Walden

Red Silk Diaries, Volume 1

He looked up at me and flashed that damned sexy ass smile again. God bless, he was hot. That freakin’ smile made my heart beat faster. I can’t explain the sensation, it’s as though I can’t breathe when he’s near me. “Are your legs the only thing you shaved last night?” Was that an evil smirk? Brett’s evil look was more to die for than that sexy smile of his. Good Lord, things were outta hand. My brain was on melt down, so my raging hormones took over. That in itself was bad. My hormones haven’t gotten laid in months, and neither has the rest of me for that matter. “Why don’t you slide your hand further and find out.” That was it, definitely in the danger zone now. There was another low rumble in his throat as he slid his hand further up my leg and under my skirt. I caught my breath as his finger reached the elastic of my thong. He slipped his finger under the elastic and rubbed me in search of my curly mound. All he was able to find was the small landing strip covering my moist lips. And lemme tell you, by this time they were more than a little moist. “Nice shave, babe.” His voice rumbled yet again and my heart thudded in my chest. The rubbing was making me hotter than I already was. I knew I couldn’t take too much more without getting my hands on him, too. I leaned forward and grabbed his smooth face with my hands. Even this late in the day, his face was still as soft as if he had just shaved it. I moved my thumb across his lower lips. He has those pouty lips you could suck on for hours. I could feel my heart pick up its pace again as I moved in close and kissed him. Oh, dear God! His lips were softer than I remembered. I just wanted to suck on them a minute, but my tongue had a mind of its own. With his finger still in my thong, he stood in front of me and wrapped the other hand around my waist. He pulled me closer and responded to the intrusion of my tongue, while his finger slid into my slit. Talk about major shivers. I thought I was going to die right there, but it was only the beginning. I wrapped my arms around his neck to keep from falling over when my legs turned to Jell-o. Brett is an incredible kisser. Gentle, yet demanding, pulling me closer with every brush of his tongue against mine. I could feel his chest rumble against mine, a primal, hungry growl as he took the kiss deeper. His hand wandered down to my butt and he

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Red Silk Diaries, Volume 1

thrust me toward his strained erection as his finger slipped from my thong. Right then and there I decided he needed to be outta those pants and into me. I could feel the monster he was hiding in his khakis. My hands immediately went to his buckle. The urge to draw him out was overwhelming. He groaned into my mouth as I undid his pants and let them fall to the floor. I reached down as best I could to feel his cock through his underwear. However…he wasn’t wearing any fucking underwear! Brett had gone commando. I think I squealed when I felt his hot flesh in my hand because he stopped kissing me. I must have looked shocked cuz he chuckled. “Is there something wrong with my package?” He was so calm and cool about the question, but I could see the tension building. As a matter of fact, I felt his balls tighten when I gave his shaft a squeeze. “Not a thing, babe. The commando threw me off a little.” Ok, I actually giggled like a schoolgirl in heat. I dunno where it came from, but the sound was a little annoying to me. Luckily, he just smiled. “The whole underwear thing is too constricting.” He moved me away from the desk and lifted my skirt to my waist, licking his lips as he looked at me. “Those look a bit constricting too. I think you need to get out of them.” “And how do you think they should come off?” “I’m gonna tear them off you in a second.” He moved in closer, but I stopped him. The poor guy looked confused as hell. “What?” “Do you wanna know what I think?” He probably didn’t, but I was gonna tell him anyway. “I think you should take them off with your teeth.” “Mmm, baby, you’re making my mouth water.” God, the rumble in his voice made me horny. “Prove it.” I bit my lower lip and waited for his next move. A half grin spread across his face as he eyed me from head to toe. “First, I need to see more of you.” He reached up to my face and rubbed my cheek with his thumb. My eyes automatically shut and I leaned into his hand. A low moan escaped my slightly parted lips, as I opened my eyes to find him staring at me with his perfect smile. He moved his hands down to my blouse and unbuttoned it slowly, revealing my

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Red Silk Diaries, Volume 1

pink satin bra. His knuckles gently brushed the material as he continued removing my blouse, causing an instant reaction from my already aching nipples. I know he saw what he was doing to me. His breathing had gotten heavier with each button. The blouse was wide open so he slipped it off my shoulders, letting it fall beside his pants. His hands roamed back up my arms to my shoulders, sending chills with every motion. Brett moved them across my chest and rested one on each waiting breast. I heard myself moan while he gently squeezed and massaged them, as I rolled my head back from the sensation. He pinched my nipples through the satin, which sent shock waves straight down to my flooding pussy. The feelings were more intense than anyone I had ever been with before. I can’t explain it, but my body was reacting to his every touch. The pinching stopped and he moved his hands around to my back while he kissed me. The taste of his lips was like an addicting drug I couldn’t get enough of. With one quick movement he had my bra unfastened and was pulling it from my body. He released my lips and slid the bra off completely, staring at my full and aching D’s. Brett moaned again and lowered his head to my chest. He must have sensed the girls needed some extra attention. He cupped my right breast while his mouth and tongue fondled and suckled the left. I could feel the electricity his obviously expert tongue was causing. I leaned on my arms a little, holding onto my desk for dear life and arching enough to give him full access. I wanted to reach for him, touch him, but I couldn’t move. The feel of his tongue on me was beyond anything I had ever felt. He switched breasts, giving each one equal time and attention. I moaned and threw my head back further. My moaning must have set something off within him because he grabbed me and pulled me closer, burying his face in my soft mounds. His goatee tickled as he devoured me. I took advantage of the ravaging and undid my skirt. I figured I should help him out a little. Actually, I wanted him to have better access to all my aching parts. He grunted when the material from my skirt rubbed against his hard-on as it fell next to my blouse. The devouring stopped, but he wasn’t finished. His body started moving downward as he butterfly kissed his way to my belly button, adding a little tongue

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Red Silk Diaries, Volume 1

here and there. I watched as he moved downward ever so slowly. There was something about watching a man give me pleasure that gave me a thrill. He glanced up at me as he stopped right at the band of my thong. He winked at me, and then with his tongue and teeth, he began to lower the thong from its place. Damn, he was good at following requests. He kept his eyes on me as he got the thong loose and moved it down my long, smooth legs. When he reached my ankles I lifted my feet out and he tossed it aside. There I was, naked and hornier than ever. I swear, I thought I was gonna drip all over the carpet I was so damn wet already. He got off his knees and gave me that evil grin again as he pulled me to him and lifted me onto my desk. He pushed me back gently so I was lying down, then he spread my legs up and over his shoulders. There was no more talk; it was all action. He went down on one knee with my legs draped across his shoulders. Spreading my legs further apart, he licked my lips from my dripping opening to my clit. My back arched at the sensation, but he was relentless. He did it again, and again my back arched into him. I heard him moan as he took my swollen clit into his mouth and sucked on it. He lapped and sucked every drop out of me, penetrating me with his tongue. It was pure bliss. He never gave my juices enough time to flow. He was all over it. “Oh! Shit!” My hands flew to the sides of the desk as I held on tight. My hips bucked involuntarily at the stimulation. I could feel my juices flowing from me. The man was magic. He continued with his tongue lashings as he took in my juices as they spilled over. He licked and flicked and sucked for what felt like hours. All the while I was writhing in glorious lust, moaning so loud I’m sure the cleaning crew heard me, but I didn’t care. Brett was making all the right moves and I didn’t want him to stop, but he was going to have to. I didn’t want to come without him getting off, too. “Brett, please!” I moaned. His hands slipped under my ass and lifted me higher. The lashings continued without rest.

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“Brett, I need…” My thoughts trailed off as he plunged his tongue inside me again and swirled it like he was digging for buried treasure. I gripped the desk tighter as my hips raised to accommodate him. He slowed his pace, then stop briefly, “What do you need, baby? I can’t seem to get enough of you. Your taste and every sound you make drive me harder.” I tried to catch my breath so I could speak. I leaned up on my elbows to look into his beautiful eyes. “I need you inside me. Please!” I could hear myself begging, but again, I didn’t care. I really needed to feel his cock inside me. My body shuddered at the thought of having him in me. “Is that all you wanted?” A glazed grin spread across his face as he stood over my trembling body. “You think you can take it all at once?” He was killing me. My brain shut down and my hormones took over once again. “Just fuck me!” Don’t ask where that came from cuz it shocked me too, but apparently it thrilled the hell outta Brett. I had never seen a man move so fast in my life. He lowered me from his shoulders and moved himself between my legs. The tip of his hard cock teased the entrance to my cave. He groaned as he moved the head across my slick lips before moving it in slowly, parting the way with his thickness. He grunted like a wild animal as his long shaft made it all the way inside me. He completely filled me. “Mmm, babe, you’re so tight and wet.” Brett reached over and grabbed hold of my ignored breasts. He caressed them as he thrust slowly in and out of me, teasing me with the tip of his cock before he eased it back in. He groaned with every re-entry as he took my nipples between his thumb and forefinger. He tweaked and thrust in a musical rhythm. My head was swirling with his every move. I couldn’t take it anymore. I wanted to cum so bad. “Faster, Brett, please.” The begging was out of control, but I couldn’t help myself. His huge cock in my tight pussy was doing a number on me. I felt my walls squeeze him tighter with every penetrating thrust he made. He quickened his pace, following my demands to the letter. I wrapped my long legs around his waist as he released my breasts to let them bounce with the gyrations.

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The more he thrust, the more I pushed myself toward him. Beads of sweat formed on Brett’s face as he pounded me faster and harder into my desk. It felt like we were going to break through we were going at it so hard. His breathing sped up and I could tell he was trying to keep from coming. I squeezed him tighter and moved my hips to his rhythm. He groaned louder, and screamed out in frustration. “Babe, I need to cum!” My heart felt for him. I needed the same relief. “Then do it, I can’t hold back anymore!” There was no way I could let him suffer anymore. I could see it on his face, he wanted to explode, but so did I. He pumped a few more times and growled as he shot his juices deep inside me. “Brett!” I couldn’t help but scream out his name as I hit my orgasm with a fierce shudder. It was the strongest one I had ever had. I was still shaking as I felt him pull out slowly. He sat me up and pulled me toward him, kissing me softly. Our naked bodies, pressed up against each other, felt warm and tingly. I loved the feel of his chest up against mine. Our breathing began to slow, but our kissing got deeper and more demanding. “I want you again,” he growled into my parted lips. My eyes flew open, but the kissing continued. He pulled back to look at me and chuckled at my expression. “You can’t be serious.” I said to him with a giggle. He looked down at himself. My eyes couldn’t help but follow his gaze. “I’m dead serious.” God help me. His fuck monster was still hard. My hand rushed to my mouth to stifle another girlish giggle. I had never seen such stamina. I wasn’t sure I could handle another ride like that so soon. He placed his finger under my chin and raised my head to look him in the eyes. “Did I hurt you? You looked almost scared.” There was genuine concern in his voice. It made my heart melt. He was such a giver and so concerned for me it made me want him more. I smiled and cupped his face in my hands. There was a mixture of emotions running through me that I couldn’t sort out. There was utter lust for him, but there was something else, too. I actually had feelings for him.

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I’m not saying this encounter made me fall in love with Brett, but I definitely wanted more than just a torrid affair. I smiled softly and gathered my thoughts. “Is this all we’re going to be, just two people fucking in an office?” He removed my hands from his face and held them in his for a minute. “This isn’t all I wanted from you. I want to get to know you. The hot sex was just a bonus.” You have no idea the relief that washed over me when I heard him say that. Not that the sex wasn’t good, it was fucking outstanding, but I wanted there to be more than just a quickie in my office. I want to get to know him better, too. “Good.” I leaned forward and sucked on his lower lip a minute. How I loved those lips. “Now, about that round two offer. I think I can handle it now.” “Babe, I was hoping you’d say that.” His smile faded as he lowered his lips to mine. His kiss was demanding and powerful. He knew what he wanted from me, and I was more than willing to give it to him, over and over again if I had to.

April 18, 2005 Well, it’s going to be a relaxing Sunday. I have no set plans and I don’t feel like doing anything anyway. Brett wanted to go to the beach, but I just don’t feel up to it. We went to dinner and a movie last night. What I really wanted was to lock him in my bedroom for a few hours, but it was a nice evening. We talked and got to know each other better. He’s a pretty interesting guy and that smile held my attention all night. I don’t know what it is about that man that has me all frazzled and flustered. It actually scares me a little because I think I like him more than I think I should at this point. I mean, I genuinely care about him, his feelings and what he says. I worry if there is something wrong with him and I’m barely eating. Ok, the barely eating part is actually a good thing. He makes me feel like a giddy school girl. Maybe I’m just reading too much into what he says to me. We talked about a lot of different things last night. We even got into us and how we feel. I know… what guy

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talks about his feelings? It was so new and refreshing to me. I almost didn’t know how to react to it. I just wanted to reach out and hug him for sharing. So you wanna know what he said? Well I was gonna tell you anyway cuz it was all too damn cute to keep to myself. He told me how I make him feel like he’s worth something, like he’s special. Can you believe it? The whole time I was thinking the same thing. How he made me feel beautiful and sexy, and how just his smile gave me shivers. No one had ever told me I made them feel that way before, and no one had ever made me feel so wanted before. Not even my ex-boyfriend of five years made me feel the way he does. I dunno if I can even explain it right. He just went on about how good he feels when he’s with me, and how he liked spending time with me. He even went on to say that it wasn’t just about the sex; he genuinely liked being around me. Another thing, he even said that I make him feel young again and that I started a fire in him. I know, I’m going on and on like a mush ball, but I can’t help it. He sets things off in me I didn’t know I had. It’s the best feeling though, and that’s what scares me. I think my head is letting my heart get way ahead of me. I hate when that happens, but then again it’s never happened like this before. I’m always weary of the men I have dated. Brett makes me so comfortable I feel as though I’ve known him for years. Damn, I dunno what to think, but I hope I’m not gonna fall flat on my face. I really care about him, maybe too much, but I care. Ok, enough of this, back to relaxation mode in front of the TV. Maybe I’ll call Brett later and invite him over for dinner and dessert.

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April 21, 2005 *Girlie sigh* I am such a dork. Not in a bad way, just in a school girl kinda way. I’m all giddy again. This is getting insane. I’ve never been such a mush pot. Well, let’s go ahead and rewind a little. Don’t want anyone left behind on all this. I called Brett around 3:30 Sunday afternoon and asked him if he wanted a quiet home cooked meal. He jumped on the offer and said he would bring a bottle of wine as long as there was going to be dessert. Fabulous, we were set, but somehow I didn’t think he meant he wanted a flan for dessert. I took some steaks out of the freezer, prepared some fresh black beans in the pressure cooker and made some rice. I tossed together a side salad too, just in case. I don’t want him to go hungry if he doesn’t like rice and beans like we Cubans do. Moving right along…Brett knocked on my door at exactly six-thirty. If nothing else, the man was punctual. I opened the door and there he was with a bottle of wine and a dozen red roses. I can’t remember the last time I got flowers from anyone. It was too sweet for words, especially since we had only been seeing each other for a few days. I tell you, the man kills me with his romantic mushy side. A guy like that is few and far between. I feel lucky to have found him for myself. Shit…now I’m doing the mushy thing. Lemme get back to the story before I make myself cry. I stepped aside so he could walk in. He leaned in and kissed my cheek, handing me the roses, “I couldn’t resist getting my beautiful girl some flowers.” Yes, he said his beautiful girl. Didn’t I tell you he liked me? He’s already staking claim. “They’re gorgeous, Brett, thank you.” I took them from him and followed him into the living room. “Make yourself comfortable while I find a vase to put these in water.” I saw him sit on the couch before I disappeared into the kitchen. I practically ransacked the place trying to find the only vase I own. I came out a few minutes later and placed the vase on my small dinette. They really did look amazing. He turned on the couch when he heard me. “Dinner smells really good,” he said as he took a deep breath.

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“It’s ready if you’re hungry now.” He looked at me and smiled, “Can we have dessert first?” I saw the evil gleam in his eye as he asked. The man was definitely the devil in disguise. “No, we may not,” I answered as firmly as I could, stifling a laugh in the process. “I have a special dessert planned and I refuse to let you ruin it with that sexy smile of yours.” He gave a hearty laugh and held up his hands in surrender, “Ok, babe, whatever you say. Dinner first it is.” He rose from the couch and walked towards me. I offered him a seat at the table, which I had already set of course, and went back into the kitchen to bring out the food. I laid it all out so that we could serve ourselves only because I wasn’t sure if he was going to like everything. “Babe, this looks great.” He leaned over; reaching for the bottle of wine I had taken out, and filled our glasses. Holding his up, “How about a toast?” I couldn’t help but smile as I raised my glass next to his. “To the start of a long and lasting relationship.” Good lord! My heart stopped. Was he for real? I was fucking speechless for the first time in my whole thirty-two years of life. I could have cried right there, but all I did was smile and take a very long sip of the red wine. He put his glass on the table and stood up. I thought he was going somewhere, but he reached over to take my plate. “Brett, what are you doing?” “I was gonna serve your plate.” Oh my God. He’s a guest in my house and he wanted to serve me. Damn it, I hate him. “I can’t let you do that, you’re supposed to be my guest.” I laughed it off. “But I like doing things for you, my love.” Melting heart again. “How about we make a deal?” “What kinda deal?” he raised an eyebrow and smiled. “Calm down lover-boy,” I giggled at the horny expression on his face. “When you invite me over for dinner, you can serve me then. Today, I am going to be doing the serving. Ok?” “Yes, ma’am,” he answered jokingly. Ok, so anyway, I served him a plate. He had never tried black beans so I gave him

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a small serving. I’ll assume he liked it cuz he ate it all and served himself some more. Blah…blah…blah. Moving right along. We ate lie pigs and finished off the bottle of wine he had opened. Wine makes me a little more giggly than normal, so I tried to maintain my composure. He helped me clear the table, and then sat back down. “So, what’s for dessert?” “I’m so glad you asked,” I said as I walked back into the kitchen. I came back out shaking a can of whipped cream. “Sweet,” his face lit up. “You made a pie.” I bit my lower lip, “Not exactly.” A puzzled expression clouded his face, “What do you mean, not exactly?” “I mean, I didn’t make a pie.” “Ok, I got that part. So what is for dessert?” The poor guy was so confused I almost felt sorry for him, but not really. I walked over to where he was sitting and took him by the hand. “You’re dessert.” “Oh really?” he said with a groan in his throat. “Mmm hmm, and you’ll be served in the bedroom.” I pulled him out of the chair and led him to my room down the hall. He groaned as he got up and followed. He was killing me, as usual. The man has no idea the power he possesses over me in such a short amount of time. I opened the door to my room. It’s pretty plain actually. I’m no interior designer. I have a queen sized bed with the headboard against the far wall, a dresser with mirror in natural wood across from the foot of the bed, and two nightstands. I have trinkets here and there, but that’s about it. Oh, I did paint the room a pretty shade of blue when I moved it so it would match my comforter and sheets. I’m goofy like that. Anyway, I led him in and sat him on the bed. He looked around while he sat, “This is nice, babe.” “Thanks,” was all I said. I really didn’t wanna talk anymore. I wanted him so bad I could taste it. I laid the whipped cream canister next to him on the bed and straddled his legs. He put each of his hands on my thighs while I took off his shirt. I loved the look and feel of his chest. “Mmm, much better,” I growled.

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I leaned forward, with my hands on his chest, and kissed him softly. I can’t resist those beckoning lips of his. They were calling out for me without saying a word. I moved my tongue along the edge then gently bit him lower lip. I heard his breath catch as he squeezed my thighs. I pulled back far enough to get him to stand and I undid his pants. “Mmm, baby, what are you doing to me?” His hands ran along my body. There was deep desire in his eyes when he looked at me. I swear I could get lost in his eyes. Yeah, I know this is all kinda fast, but I’ve never felt this way with anyone before. I can’t even explain it, but I know I hate to let go and let him leave when we’re together. I get an awful feeling in my chest and it goes away when I see him again. I don’t even wanna think it’s the L word. Shit, sidetracked again. I got his pants off, and there it was, a massive erection trying to get through his boxer briefs. “No commando today, babe?” “Not in these pants, baby,” he chuckled. “Only in the thick khakis or my jeans.” “That’s ok. Only one more layer to get through before I can have my dessert.” I swear my mouth started to water at the thought of wrapping my lips around his hard cock. I could only imagine how good he must taste. He turned his head to the side and looked into my eyes, “And what do I get for dessert?” I smiled at him, “Sweetie, you don’t need dessert. It’ll make you fat.” With that said I pushed him back on the bed and hooked my fingers into his waistband, pulling his boxer briefs right off him. My God, he was hard as a rock already with a drop of his excitement at the tip. Now I understood what Brett meant when he said his mouth watered for me. I was feeling it. I leaned forward and licked the tip of his cock to get that first taste of his essence. He was definitely yummy. The sensation must have been too much for him because his arms suddenly flopped across the mattress and he grabbed onto the comforter. He dug deep and moaned, “Baby, that feels so good.” “Mi amor, you ain’t felt nothing yet.” His constant noise and appreciation made me want him that much more. I had never been with a man that was so vocal about the

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pleasure he was receiving. I loved it. I felt that I was really in control of his emotions. With that in mind, I reached fro the whipped cream, shook the canister, and popped the top. Sitting beside my hunk of naked man, I sprayed a dab on the tip of his cock. He jumped with a chill since the cream was still cold. I didn’t give him time to feel too cold though cuz I sucked the cream right off the tip. I shook the can again, but sprayed along the length of his mighty shaft. Again he got a chill. I tossed the canister on the floor, positioned my head over him, and then took him completely into my mouth. I felt the head hit the back of my throat. All I could hear was Brett moan. After a few sucks neither of us could take anymore. I pulled off my shirt, flipped off my bra, and lost my skirt and panties. I don’t think I had ever gotten naked so fast in my life. But then again, I’ve never wanted to. I asked him to move to the center of the bed. In his near orgasmic daze, he did as he was told. I lay across him and kissed him, his cock right up against my wet pussy. I felt it jerk between my legs as I kissed him deeper and his arms wrapped around me to pull me close. After a few minutes of delicious kisses, I moved and straddled him. I needed him inside me. I hovered over him and teased the head of his cock at my entrance. I could see the aching in his face. “Oh God, baby, please don’t tease me like that,” his voice was rough and laced with need and desire. I eased myself lower. In one quick thrust, I took him in completely. He filled me to my very core. I sat and moved in small circles, enjoying the sounds of his desperate groans. Reaching out to me, he grabbed hold of my breasts. He kneaded and squeezed as I continued to gyrate on his thick shaft. He took my nipples between his thumb and forefinger and began to tweak them. The more he pinched the faster I rocked. Now it was me doing the moaning as I rocked even harder, my clit rubbing on his bristled hairs. The sensation was amazing. We were both groaning and panting, trying to keep our rhythm, but our need to release was becoming too over powering. His groaning became louder the faster and deeper I went. “Oh… baby… I don’t want to cum yet.” He growled out between gasps of air. “Slow down.”

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I gave him an evil grin, “I want to hear you scream when I make you cum.” Ok, I dunno where all this lust was coming from, but I think he liked it cuz he got louder. I totally understood why guys worked harder when they hear us scream. It’s like an adrenaline rush to know you are giving your partner the ultimate pleasure, and that they’re enjoying it. I rocked faster and faster, holding his chest for support. I could feel my own orgasm ripping through me as he grabbed my hips and grunted out his seed. The room was almost spinning as I collapsed on his chest. “Damn, babe, that was amazing,” he said as he moved my hair aside and kissed my forehead. He wrapped his arms around me and squeezed me tight. I love the feel of his arms around me and out bare chest together. I feel warm and tingly inside. I can’t begin to tell you what an exciting time that was. Not only was the sex great, but the fact that he held me as we fell asleep was just as good. I felt at peace, needed, and in a way, I even felt loved.

May 9, 2005 Happy Birthday to me ☺ I usually hate my birthday, but today was a little different. Despite the fact that I had to work, the day was pretty nice. Some of my coworkers bought me a cake and surprised me in the break room. Even the big boss was there to sing me an off tune song. It was pretty funny. After the cake I had to go out to my car for my briefcase. In the rush to get into the building on time for my meeting I had forgotten it. I got to my car in the garage and hit the auto door locks and alarm. As I reached for the handle I noticed there was something there. Ok folks, you ready for this? There was a fully blooming long stemmed red rose in the handle with a little note. I looked around the garage and opened it. “A perfect rose for a perfect girl. I’ll be by tonight with your ‘real’ present. Love, Brett.” I wanted to cry. No one had ever left a flower for me on my car before. That was the sweetest, most romantic thing anyone had ever done for me. I grabbed my briefcase

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out of the trunk, took my rose and note in the other hand, and rushed back into the building. When I got to my office, I closed the blinds and sat at the desk. I picked up the phone and dialed Brett’s extension. “Yes, my love,” he answered in that sexy voice of his. “Get to my office, now.” Then I hung up the phone. I wasn’t trying to sound angry; I was trying to keep myself from crying. There was a knock on the door five minutes later. I walked over to let him in. he had a really worried look on his face. “Did I do something wrong?” He inched his way inside. I shut the door behind him. That’s when he looked really worried. I turned to face him, “Are you trying to make me cry?” He looked puzzled until I pointed at the rose and note lying on my desk. I heard him sigh in relief. “Of course not. I don’t want to make you cry.” I stepped closer and hugged him, whispering in his ear, “No one has ever done that for me before.” He pulled me back to look into my watery eyes, “I can’t believe no one has ever given you flowers.” “No one has ever left me one on the car like that. It was the sweetest thing I’ve ever seen.” Holding back the tears was not working. They kinda streamed down my face and my heart was pounding something awful. He held my face, wiped the tears with his thumb, and leaned in to kiss me. “I didn’t mean to make you cry. I just thought you deserved a pretty flower on your birthday. I couldn’t resist when I saw it and I knew you had to have it. It was the biggest and prettiest one they had there.” I looked into his comforting eyes, “It’s beautiful and I love it. Thank you.” I kissed him again and he held me tight. It felt so good to be squeezed like that. “So, I’ll see you tonight around seven.” He pulled away from me and headed toward the door to leave. “Wait,” I was curious. “What’s the surprise?” “If I tell you it isn’t a surprise now, is it?” He winked at me, blew me a kiss and

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left. I was left alone in my office wondering what he had up his sleeve. The butterflies were doing a number on my stomach. Oh crap… this sucks! I didn’t realize how small this journal book was. I’m outta pages. Oh well, I guess I’ll have to go out and get a new one to keep going with how my birthday went. Shit, when will I have the time for that? I hope you all have some patience…

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Turnabout By Tracy Cole

Saturday, June 10.

Dear Diary, I got promoted! I’m so excited. Some work friends took me out last night. I might have had a little too much to drink… alright, a lot too much… but I don’t start my new position until Monday and I have the whole weekend to recover. This is so great! I’ll have an assistant of my own! No more having to share one with three others. Yea!!

Sunday, June 11

Dear Diary, I met the cutest guy today, and he moved in right across the hall from me! Wait, wait! I have to start at the beginning. If I don’t, you’ll never understand how dreamy he was. Is. You know what I mean.

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Around eleven this morning there was banging and grunting outside my door. As a concerned citizen (aka nosy neighbor) I went to look. He was on the other side of the peephole. Of course, at the time, I didn’t know it was him. At the time he was just a very nice ass in a sweet pair of jeans. He was wrestling with the armchair and the feelings he aroused in me made me feel like the dirtiest of Peeping Thomasettes. His pants fit him so nicely I stayed at that peephole for an entire minute. A full sixty seconds. My eye started to hurt a little being pressed so tightly to my door. I had to move my head, but I wasn’t done being neighborly, so I swung the door open. “Hi,” I said. I smiled at his back pockets. I wanted so badly to walk up and trace the curve of that ass with my fingers. “Need some help?” Maybe squeeze it a little. He turned, and that nice pair of jeans turned into a man. A really cute one. No, more than cute. Beautiful. His eyes were are all sparkly brown, like tea the sun hit just right, and his face was a little red from dragging his furniture around, but that just added to the sweetness I saw there. “Yeah,” he said, and smiled back. “I could use some help.” I helped him move his stuff all day, and as a tenant on the eleventh floor, that’s saying something. In the evening, he let me play with his knick knacks. He has great knick knacks. When the last vase was placed, he ordered out for a pizza and I rented a movie. “So, is this your first time in the city?” I asked when I got back. I tossed the movie on the counter and pulled a slice of pizza from the pizza box. He put the movie on and sat on the sofa. I, of course, sat next to him. I may have sat a little closer than was strictly necessary but, in my defense, he smelled really good. “Yes,” he said, and turned his whole body toward me. “What about you? Have you lived here long?”

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“All my life,” I said and tried not to melt into him. His eyes were so deep, so rich and dark, like a vat of chocolate. I wanted so badly to jump. He was looking at me with such focus, such single minded intensity, that I was a little overwhelmed. “Well, I went to Canada once. But that was a high school day-trip, so I don’t think it really counts.” “I always think of New York City natives as worldly.” He smiled. “Do you think that’s odd?” “What? Blanket assumptions? Nah. I’d say they’re pretty par for the course. Besides, it’s New York. We don’t have a China Town and Little Italy for nothing.” He laughed and my heart skipped the tiniest beat. I was being totally ridiculous. I knew I was. But then again, I couldn’t remember the last time I’d had sex, so I kind of forgave myself. Then again, throwing myself at a random man? My next door neighbor? I’d have to look at him everyday for the rest of my life. Well, everyday for the rest of my tenancy. Is that a word? I think it might be. It can’t be healthy. A man I barely know, in the middle of the city, a possible stalker type (but he was sitting next to me, nibbling on a piece of pizza and didn’t look anything like a stalker-type). In fact, he looked more like a sweet, really hot little puppy dog. Hm. Maybe that’s not the best comparison. Definitely not a good visual. I couldn’t do it. I just couldn’t. It wasn’t responsible. Picking up some guy at a bar made more sense than this. He lived across the hall, for goodness sakes! If he did turn out to be a stalker, I’d never be able to prove it. I stuck that piece of pizza in my mouth and scooted slightly away from him. I had to get a handle on myself. A girl didn’t throw herself at a man on the first night. It wasn’t even a date. And he certainly wasn’t throwing himself at me!

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Goodness. I hope he’s the shy type and not just uninterested. I swallowed. I swallowed more than the food in my mouth. “I’ve got to get up early tomorrow,” I said. “I should probably get home. Turn in.” I got up to leave and he did, too. “You don’t have to go now. I could make some coffee. What about the movie?” The opening credits were flashing by. “You watch it.” I pulled the door open. I wasn’t going to be that girl. He was my neighbor. How uncomfortable would that break up be? Oh my god, I thought, after I’d walked out the door and turned around to say goodnight, I don’t know his name. And since I didn’t, I said, “It was nice meeting you,” and left it at that. “It was nice meeting you, too,” he said. “Are you sure you don’t want to stay? You haven’t even finished your pizza.” He held the door open for me to reenter, with my half-eaten slice of pizza, and I have to admit, I almost caved. But I knew then, and I know now, if I’d walked back into that apartment tonight I wouldn’t have left till morning. And then I’d spend the rest of my life avoiding him because I don’t need a relationship. Not right now. Right now, at most, I could handle a one-night-stand. But is that possible with a neighbor? No. “No, I’ve got to get up early. Maybe some other time.” “Yeah. Maybe.” He didn’t shut the door until after I’d reentered my apartment. I turned to look out the peephole and watched him close the door. I wonder if he knew I was watching. I hope not.

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Monday, June 12

Dear Diary, Work was…interesting. I was very excited going in because I got that promotion on Friday and today was my first day officially on the job. I walked into the building and down the hall, rode up the elevator, walked past desks and desks and desks and people and more people and heard, “Congrats, Kay!” “Look who made it to the big-time!” and more quietly, in the back, almost unheard, “It should’ve been mine. I deserved it more.” Of course, it was this last that made me proudest of all. Cloud nine must’ve picked me up in the lobby and delivered me to my new office on the ninth floor because I was still flying when I got there. That much happiness doesn’t last. It can’t. The power it takes to sustain something for that period of time…it’s nearly impossible. I should’ve remembered that. I should’ve known. I pushed through the door to my office and took a seat behind my desk. I swiveled around in it a few times and laughed, still filled with the joy a promotion can bring. I stopped quickly when my boss walked through the door. “Kenneth!” I said, catching myself mid-swivel. I got up and shook his hand. “I just wanted to thank you again for entrusting me with this position. You won’t regret it.” “I’m sure I won’t,” he said, and smiled. “I assigned you an assistant. He should be here soon. I sent him to get coffee.” He pulled something from behind his back. “Here’s your plaque,” he said, and handed me a long, rectangular name plate for my desk. “One for you, and one for your assistant.” He handed me another. It said James Fielding. I was looking forward to meeting him. I’d never had an assistant before. Well, not

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one of my own. I hoped he was cute. “You’ll need to start early on the Hollister account. I don’t have to tell you they’re our number one priority. If we’re going to keep them, we have to hustle.” He smiled. It was a little condescending, but he was my boss, and he’d almost single-handedly got me this promotion. Kenneth was a great man to work for. Company morale was important to him, and since high morale meant happy workers, he was a popular boss. “No, no, you don’t have to tell me. Hollister, Priority One,” I said. I almost saluted but thought it might be in bad taste. “Good. Good,” Kenneth said. He left and I was alone, again, in the glory of my new office. I opened the vertical blinds to the glass wall surrounding my office (yes, it was that great) and almost choked. My neighbor, the one with the nice ass and the pizza, was on the other side of my door. He looked at me with a cup of coffee in his hand. He looked as dumbfounded as I felt. No, no, I thought. No. This can’t be. But it could. And it was. I closed the blinds on him but he walked in anyway. “You must be Kay Manning,” he said when he was inside. “I didn’t catch your name yesterday. You ran out before I could ask.” “That’s me,” I said, and moved to sit behind my desk. I picked up his name plate and handed it to him. “And you must be James Fielding.” He smiled. Such a nice smile. Such strong white teeth I couldn’t help but wonder what they’d feel like brushing across my shoulder, or grazing my nipple. He took the nameplate. “I am.” I couldn’t stop looking at him. It’s almost impossible that he doesn’t know I have a huge crush on him. I can’t stop making these stupid moony faces whenever he’s around. I get caught in the brown of his eyes, and it’s long moments later before I realize I’ve

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been staring and manage to look away. So embarrassing. Which makes what I did next a little more understandable. “Sit down, James,” I said, and motioned to the seat in front of my desk. He sat and I had only moments to run through what I had to say, moments to prepare myself for what I had to do. It wasn’t nearly enough time. Not when his eyes were so big and so sweet, not when his arms looked like they could hold me for hours… I sighed. “I think we have a problem.” “I don’t know that I’d call it a problem, exactly.” The tone of his voice and the set of his jaw made me blush. The way he looked at my lips and smiled intensified it. Oh, this man was hot. Unbelievable. Eye candy. Nothing more than eye candy. “I mean considering our living arrangements. We’re neighbors. I don’t think it’s a good idea to work together as well. I mean, think about it. Do you really want to live across the hall from your boss? What if you wanted to lie and call in sick? I’d be right there to check up on you.” “So long as it’s you checking up on me, I don’t think I’d care. That is, if you don’t leave before the movie’s over.” He smiled his perfect little smile, with his perfect little teeth, and I almost fell. I couldn’t help it. He was getting to me. I needed James gone but I wanted him to stay. He was so cute. So funny. And he looked at me like…I don’t know. Like I was something missing from him. An arm or a leg that he’d misplaced. He was my neighbor. And my assistant. Two of the top two reasons why a relationship between us would never work and why a one-night stand was impossible. Life was getting better as it was getting worse. “No, seriously,” he said, “I hope our living situation and work situation don’t

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bother you too much. I really need this job. As you know, I’ve never been to the city before. I just moved here. I have to make a living somehow.” He grinned. “At least until the other thing takes off.” “Other thing?” I asked, and leaned forward. My head in my hands, my elbows on the table…. I had to look like a crushing teenager. Even now, hours later, I cringe when I think about it. But in the moment, it felt like I was sinking into his chocolate eyes. “I’m not really an assistant,” he said. “Right now I am, but I have a business degree. I graduated last year. I want to move up in the company, but you gotta start somewhere, right? First run through college I got a degree in corporate accounting. After a while, noticing the numbers were wrong wasn’t enough. I wanted to fix the numbers, too. Saying ‘This needs to be fixed’ and actually fixing it are such different things. It wasn’t doing it for me anymore. It just wasn’t as fulfilling a position as I thought it would be.” “Right,” I said. Well, that solved one problem. I don’t mean to sound the snob but I did wonder how he could juggle my rent on an assistant’s salary. “No wonder you can afford to live in my building. Hell, you can probably afford a lot better.” “Well, I’ve got a bit saved up. I wasn’t doing badly when I left,” he said. “But right now, I’m just an assistant. I’ll move up, though. I’ll get somewhere in this business, I promise you that.” I tried to listen, I really did, but my nipples were hard, sooo hard, and they kept rubbing against the lace of my bra, which rubbed in turn against the fabric of my shirt. All I wanted to do was close the blinds, (Oh, they’re already closed, I thought, eyeing them sideways) and ask James to fuck me on the acres of mahogany desk in front of me. Maybe I’d offer to shine his wood. I laughed at myself. I can be so tacky sometimes. “I don’t know,” I said, more focused on the dampness of my panties than the

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conversation, “that might not be the best idea.” I leaned back in my chair. My nipples were so hard they hurt. The lace of my bra felt like an hour’s worth of wet corduroy. James seemed to notice something was up with me because…well, because he looked right at my breasts. I wanted to look down and see how far they poked out but couldn’t. My professionalism wouldn’t let me. “Are you cold? Do you want me to raise the thermostat?” “No, no,” I said. “I’m hot enough.” He smiled and his voice was gruff when he said, “Not something I’d disagree with.” That’s when I understand the subtext of the last few sentences. Of course he would think I was cold. It was either turn up the thermostat or ask if he could borrow them for a temporary job as a glass cutter. Hell, diamond cutter. Why sell myself short? They probably looked like they were trying to saw their way out of my blouse. “You know what, James?” I said, making a decision. One I might regret someday, but would rejoice at today. Hopefully. If I was reading the signs right. “Can I talk to you about something? Can I be on the level?” “Uh…yeah.” “Great,” I said, deciding to treat this like any other meeting. “First things first, then,” I said and got up to lock the door. He sat in his chair and watched me. I felt him watching me. He watched me with the intensity of a thousand hands. I sat on the desk in front of him. “Sit,” I said when he started to stand. I have great legs. There’s no need for circumspection, Dear Diary, when it’s you I’m talking to. They’re great. I know they are. They’re long and smooth and I had the hair lasered off in two treatments last year. I moisturize. And most importantly, I know how to use them.

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And the consequence of my feeling like a randy teenager with great legs? I decided I didn’t want to be randy alone. I unbuttoned the top button on my blouse and let it gape open to show the red lace of my bra. My power bra. I touched my fingers to the next button and looked up at James. That button slipped through its hole as well. “Um,” he said and looked at me with such intensity, such manly need, that it touched me. I felt the heft of his look slip down my throat, into the valley between my breasts. Like a soft breath, it touched me everywhere I truly needed to be touched. But instead of quenching my need, it fueled it. It whet my appetite. I almost, almost moaned out loud, but caught the sound in my throat and swallowed it. I hiked up my skirt and planted myself more firmly on the desk. “I have a small problem working with you,” I said to him and opened and closed and opened and closed my legs using my tiptoes as leverage. I wanted his hands on me. The look in his eyes was hot, but it wasn’t enough. Not anymore. I started to sweat thinking of his palm, thick and rough, running up my leg, touching me on my bare thigh under my skirt. “I might have a little crush on you. I mean, I’m crushing pretty hard. It’s thanks to you that I’ve had to squeeze my legs together so often the past couple days. And I haven’t had sex in almost a year,” I said, getting a little more honest than I’d have liked to, “and, I keep imagining you doing things to me. Very wrong things.” I felt a bit of saliva trickle out onto the corner of my lip and I licked it off. I looked at James as he watched the movement of my tongue and my whole body shuddered with need. Oh, I wanted him. I wanted him bad. I was on a mission. I needed to get fucked and nothing, nothing, was going to stop me. “Uh huh,” James said. I touched the tip of one high heeled toe to his knee. His hand gripped my ankle. Slid up the back of my calf. “I have a crush on you, too.” His

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fingers tickled half-way up the back of my thigh and I shivered again. Swallowed. “Do you think it’s a good idea that we work together, then? I’d hate to have to fire you and have charges of sexual harassment filed against me.” But my eyes were closed as I said it. His fingers found their way over the final threads of my thigh highs. “You’re safe from me.” His fingers rounded the curve of my inner thigh and touched fabric. Heat. He found my pussy. The back of his fingers brushed so lightly over the cloth covering my slit I hardly believed he’d touched me. But then he stood and the hand under my skirt kept lightly brushing until one of the fingers pushed the fabric of my underwear to the side and dipped inside me. His hand looked so wrong under there, my skirt twitching as I twitched. Then his hand moved and I wanted to cry. Dear diary, the loss of that hand in that moment was almost too much to bear. But just as I began to complain, “No, no,” both hands were on my bottom and pushing me to the edge of the desk. His body closed in and I felt the heft of his penis, strong and hard, as it pushed against the fabric of his jeans and strained to get at me. His lips found the curve of my neck, where it melded into shoulder. He suckled there and I moaned. “I forgot to tell you,” he said, an inch from my neck. His breath was hot and soft on my wet skin, “Thanks for helping me move in.” I pulled his shirt from his pants and unbuttoned it. “Anytime.” I slipped my hands into his open shirt and touched his chest. I rolled his nipples between my fingers. And then there was a knock at my office door.

I looked at James, he looked at me and we both slid off the desk and buttoned our various buttons at record speed. What the hell was wrong with me? He was my assistant.

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I shouldn’t be doing this with him! And definitely not my first day in my new office. “Well, if this is how you handle being outside of a cubicle…” I could hear my boss already. And if I was going to fuck James, the least I could do was wait till I was home. He lived across the hall from me! Why did I have to do this at work?! What the hell was wrong with me? I buttoned the last button and flew to the door. Swung it open. “Yes?” “Hi, Ms. Lambert. Kenneth Donaldson is on line two. He said he called your office and no one answered so he tried your old line, and since your old line is now my line…” she smiled, but I could tell she was peeved. I couldn’t blame her. Extra work was never fun. “Thanks for telling me,” I said. “I’ll call him right now.” The new girl remained unimpressed by me. I couldn’t blame her on that, either. I wasn’t that impressive. But she left and I closed the door. That was the important part. I turned to look at James and felt the blush creeping up my cheeks. I had to call my boss. How bad would it have been if I’d actually fucked him? If he’d done more than touch me there. Put his fingers inside. If he’d done more than rub his dick on my crotch. I almost jumped him again. But he looked like he was about to jump me first. Not a good idea. Not considering I’d already made up my mind that sex in the office was a bad idea. So when he walked to me, used his palms as human suction cups, attached them to my ass, picked me up and wrapped my legs around his waist, I had to tell him to put me down. “Oh, no, no,” he said and put me back down on the desk. “You’re not getting off

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that easily.” He smiled and my whole body woke up. His hands found their way into my somehow unbuttoned again shirt, to nipples that were begging for attention. He laid me down on the desk and undid the clasp between my breasts. “Look at you,” he said, clearly talking to my breasts, “you want it so bad, don’t you?” I looked at my breasts, too. He was right. They looked like they were begging for it. They were tilted up, almost like they were looking back at him. Reaching for him. “Touch me,” I said. But he didn’t. Not at first, because the next thing I heard, the only sound in the then silent room was the sound of a zipper unzipping. I heard fabric being pushed down, heard it pool on the floor at his feet. Then the tip of his penis was at my hole. I felt it push into me. One glorious inch at a time it moved in. “Sneaky, sneaky boy,” I said, as my eyes rolled back in my head. It felt so good. He pounded me so hard into that desk I could’ve left a Kay mark in it. Oh, but the pounding was well received. I could be pounded like that for the rest of my life. I tried so hard to keep my voice down but his hands on my hips, bruising them, my breasts acting so unladylike as they bounced all over the place, as I got the fucking of a lifetime in the middle of my new office, by my assistant, a really hot assistant who made great sex noises, it was all too much for me. I came and I came loudly and I’m sure every person in that office building heard me. I was going to be so fired, but I didn’t care as my cunt clenched around him, as his come squirted into my body. It wasn’t until after that I considered the consequences. Which were plenty.

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Tuesday, June 20

“Kay!” Kenneth bellowed. I jerked the phone away from my ear. “Hi, Kenneth.” “I’m getting some mixed reports from the people in your division. What’s going on down there?” I froze. Was he talking about James? It had been more than a week since I’d come my brains out all over my desk, but I’d traveled all over the office, talked to every busy-body in the place, and while I heard a lot of gossip, none of it pertained to me. I mean, okay, I got a few looks that first day, but after a week’s worth of hearing nothing…? Frankly, I thought I was in the clear. Maybe there hadn’t even been any ‘looks’ that day. Maybe it was just an overactive imagination brought on by a guilty conscience. And what a guilty conscience I had. I almost fired James. About three seconds after one of the greatest, scariest orgasms of my entire life, I almost fired the creator of it. But then I thought about it, and I felt like a hypocrite. It wasn’t just him that messed up. Hell, he wasn’t even the one who messed up the most. I even fantasized about getting him kicked out of my building. Or really, having someone else get him kicked out. In my fantasy, James had to leave the building because he was caught fucking me in the parking garage. Of course, in the fantasy, nobody knew it was me. I was just a bare ass in a garage. Then I imagined he got fired (by someone else, of course) and got to stay in my building.

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And then, inevitably, because I’m such a hopeless romantic, I’d think of all the dogs and hearts and flowers a future together could bring. And the orgasms. Goodness sakes, mustn’t forget the orgasms! But then I’d think, I don’t know this guy, and get confused all over again. He seems so nice. He does everything I ask him to. But then, he’s my assistant. That’s his job. Besides, he hasn’t made any passes in a week! Over a week! Sure, I told him after the last time we had sex, after the sighing was done, that we couldn’t behave like that again. He’d nodded. “But what about at the building? What if we kept it a secret?” “It is a secret!” I hollered. Screeched would be more like it. But I was in the middle of buttoning up my shirt and imagining what would happen if my boss walked through the door right then. I can’t tell you what a killjoy that would be. Some people can handle the exhibitionist-losing-their-job thing. I can’t. It’s just not in me. But it’s been hard. It’s Tuesday and more than week has passed, and while tension is plenty, sex is not. The phone pressed into my ear and I tried to remember what the hell we were talking about. Oh yeah! “What do you mean? What kind of mixed reports?” “A little birdie mentioned to me that Sarah’s birthday was last Friday.” Sarah’s birthday? What the hell was he…? “Oh…Oh, no.” “And that there wasn’t any cake. Any gift certificate. Any flowers. Any show at all that we’re glad she made it another year. Had it been anybody else I could forgive the occasional lapse, but Kay, Sarah--” “Had a heart attack earlier this year.” She’d been laid up for a month in the

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hospital. They hadn’t thought she would make it. Everybody sent flowers, cards, gifts…you couldn’t help it. She was the nicest lady in the world. If there was a prize for being the nicest lady in the world, Sarah would, without a doubt, get it every year. “Oh, my god. I’m so sorry. I have no idea what came over me. I’ll take care of it. Don’t worry about a thing.” “I won’t. I know you’re capable.” There was a silence at the other end of the line, then, “But you’re not usually forgetful either. Is something going on? Can I help you with anything?” “No, no. I’m fine. Just a little preoccupied. I’ll be back on track soon.” “That’s good to hear, because we need our people in top form. Morale is important. As soon as they start to feel like they’re unappreciated or that they’re being taken advantage of, productivity decreases. I wouldn’t want to see that coming out of a department newly headed by someone I endorsed.” “You’re right,” I said, and rested my forehead on my palm. It was getting too heavy for my neck alone. “You’re right. I’ll take care of it.” “Good. Now, about tonight. How about Café Riz?” “Huh?” I said, because he’d caught me totally off guard. “Dinner at Café Riz? A date? How about it?” No. Absolutely not. No way in hell. You’re my boss and that’d be unprofessional. Yeah right. And sound like the biggest frickin’ hypocrite when—no, if, if—he finds out about me and James. Me and James. Walking through a meadow. Running, running, and always toward each other—like there’s some sort of deeply seated magnet inside us, pulling us together. Forever. I’m such a sap. Really, it’s ridiculous. I’ve got to get my head on straight and

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finish this phone call. “Um. Hm. As much as I appreciate the offer Kenneth, I’m afraid I’m going to have to pass. I have dinner plans with my mother. Every Tuesday night.” “Okay,” he said, sounding very much like he was checking something off a calendar, or an appointment book. “What about tomorrow?” “Nope. No good. That doesn’t work either. In fact, I’m booked right through the rest of this month.” I flipped pages in my date book, up close to the phone so he could hear it. “Well,” I said, before he could come up with another plan of attack, “I’ll get right on that. Thank you for reminding me about Sarah. Bye, Kenneth.” I hung up. Well, hell, I thought. Now what am I going to do? Then another thought occurred to me. Kenneth was the main reason I got promoted. He was the one who put in the time and energy to see me in this office. Time and energy he didn’t have to put in. Could he have an ulterior motive? Does he…could he…have a crush on me? Did Kenneth want me? In more than a corporate sense? I didn’t have much time to think about it though. It was a busy day. My workload was so heavy I barely had time to fantasize about James, much less worry about Kenneth. But later, at home, there was a knock on my door. Can you guess who, Dear Diary? Can you guess who came a tapping, a tap tap tapping, at my chamber door? It was James, quoth the Raven, Evermore. Screw nevermore. I’m too romantically inclined to ever think nevermore. Out the peephole I looked. It was him. It was his face, his beautiful, fuckable face. I opened the door. “Hi,” I said. “Hi,” he said.

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“Do you want to come in?” He rocked back on his heels. “Yeah.” I opened the door wider and he walked in. I offered him a drink. “No thanks. I just dropped by to…Yeah. I’ll take a water.” I pulled out a bottle of water and handed it to him. He tipped his head back and drank. “You just dropped by to…?” He swallowed audibly. “At the office. My first day.” He screwed the top back on the bottle, “I wanted to talk to you about…about what we did on your desk.” “Yeah,” I said. “I guess it’s time, huh? Do you want to sit down?” “No,” he said. “I’m good.” I wanted to say, ‘yes, you are’ but I thought it might distract him. I wanted to know why he was here. “Alright. Then, because I can’t cook,” I said, giving him a look, “at all, and because I’m hungry anyway, I’m going to make myself a sandwich. Do you want one?” He did, so I pulled out sandwich stuff and got to work. I wasn’t that hungry but my hands needed some sort of occupation. I’d go mad if I had to just stand there and stare at him as he talked to me about ‘that time’ he fucked me in the office. As if. Intimate conversations aren’t the easiest thing in the world for me. Besides, I don’t think I can stare at him for minutes at a time without jumping him. I even have to close my blinds at work. I’d constantly ask James to come in and help me shine my desk if I didn’t. He’s so hot. So dreamy and beautiful. He’s got such a great, deep voice, such a knack for how a woman wants to be touched. I groaned a little as I squeezed mustard onto the bread. “What?”

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“Nothing,” I said. “What did you want to talk to me about?” “About the first day at work. My first day. When we were together…” He sounded like he wanted me to turn around and look at him, but I resisted. With a vengeance I resisted. I wanted him to tell me what was on his mind before I started begging him to take me on the kitchen floor. “I thought it was great. I thought you were so sexy and hot. Your ass in my hands…I can’t stop thinking about it. Your hips. Your lips. Your knees even.” I swallowed and threw a couple of pieces of turkey down for our sandwiches. He had to be going somewhere. He had to have a point. We could not have a relationship outside of work. I’d already talked to him about that. In a letter. That I slid under his door after work. Alright, so I’m a baby. I’m a big, fucking baby. “I got your note.” “Yeah,” I said, because I didn’t know what else to say. I unwrapped the cheese and slapped it down on top of the turkey. “I understand how difficult it’s going to be to be in a relationship with me. I mean, you’re my boss. We live across the hall from each other. But I don’t have that kind of sex every day. I don’t have this burning in my gut every night. I don’t feel ill every time a woman I’ve made love to passes by me. Only you. Only you can do this to me. I need you.” He paused and I heard him walk toward me. “I need to know, at the very least, that I have a chance to find out what’s between us. I’ve never felt this way about another person, ever. I see you at work. Talking to people. Co-workers, mail room people. I hear you on the phone, and I see the decisions you make. You’re nice. You talk to everybody the same way. The decisions you make are fair, and thoughtful. They make me want to know more about you. I don’t love you, not

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yet, but I think I could. If you gave me the chance.” I slowly put the top piece of bread on both the sandwiches and handed him one. I felt a little shivery, a little shaky. I wanted to tell him to go on. Go on. Don’t stop saying such nice things to me. More, more. But at the same time, less, less. I want to hear it but I don’t think I should. It’s irresponsible of me to date somebody in the office. It’s just plain stupid to get involved with my neighbor. I mean, what’s the chance that we’re going to make it forever? I’ve never made it forever with anybody before. He might seem different now, but so does everybody else. At first. I held that turkey sandwich in one hand and James’ heart in the other. “This is crazy,” I said. “It is.” “Yeah.” I bit into the sandwich. I didn’t want to look heartless, but I needed time to think. I needed to build up the strength to tell him no, no, I can’t sleep with you again. I can’t get into a relationship. Not with you. Not while you live in my building and not while you work for me. But, as the bite slid down the back of my throat, I knew I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t say no. Not to him. Not ever again. “What I’m about to say is going to be one of the most irresponsible things I’ve ever said in my entire life.” He smiled. I smiled back. “I think you have great knees too. Really, really great knees.” “Good,” he said, around his bite. He walked over to the trashcan and lifted the lid. Spit the bite out. “You really are a bad cook. How can you ruin a turkey sandwich?” “It’s a gift.” James took me out to eat. He said he knows how to cook, but I’ll believe it when I see it. According to him, I’ll see it tomorrow.

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July 6

The past couple of weeks have been a roller coaster. James and I have been really good about keeping our personal and professional lives separate. No more fucking in the office, no kissing, hand holding, inappropriate anything. But at home, oh, at home, there was fucking. Fucking, fucking everywhere. He did me bent over the table in the kitchen, he did me sitting on the sink in the bathroom, he did me in the shower (several times) and, less interesting but still great, in the bed. We even fucked once in the parking garage. Ha! And, about getting caught and kicked out of the building? Not quite. But Barney, the guy who monitors the video tapes, winked at me when we walked in. I winked back. James and I are getting along well outside of the physical as well. Everything’s great. I’ve never been happier. And sex in the office, while still a fun fantasy, is a thing of the past. At least I’ve been responsible about something.

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March 28

It’s been a while since I’ve talked to you, Dear Diary, but whoa, have I got a doozy for you. We broke our rule today. It was my fault, though. James came in to take a memo, the blinds were already closed, and he was just sitting there, looking all proper and businesslike. Too businesslike, I thought, and kept dictating as I walked around the desk to stand in front of him. I even dictated as I knelt on the floor, unzipped his pants, dug my hands in and pulled out his dick. “We’re happy you made it to the company wide picnic and we hope you’ll be with us for next year’s as well. Cordially, etc., etc.” And I put my mouth on his penis. That pink protrusion. It looked so wrong there, standing up so straight and tall, so proud around the blue pant fabric. So succulent and sweet. I squeezed and sucked, I licked and fucked. I got really wet. Really wet. I stopped sucking and stood. I pulled my skirt up and watched his eyes dilate at the sight of my thigh highs. He was a sucker for thigh highs. I pushed my panties down to the floor and stepped out of them. Then I climbed on. I eased my body down on top of his, and guided his penis into my body. Knees on either side of him, I sat there, unmoving. I unbuttoned a few buttons, watched as the pad and pen hit the floor, and then I kissed him. “Mmm…” I moaned against his mouth. “Mmmmm….” He moaned against mine. If there was one thing in the world James could do it was kiss. And, of course, touch, I thought as his hands settled on my hips and jerked my body closer, tighter against him. I fucked him slow. It was casual, luxurious. His lips on

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the crest of my breast, feather light. But his hands were more insistent. They pushed and pulled, rocked me against him, my clit sliding deliciously along him. The buildup increased gradually but steadily and it wasn’t long before my body spasmed around him and his jizz exploded inside me. I knew I shouldn’t have. But James is so cute. He’s so sweet and unassuming. Sometimes you just really want to shock him. It’s so easy. And I love to see his face, to hear him moan into my throat, as he comes. It’s so hot. He’s so hot. It was wrong, but if I had to do it over again, I would. And guess what. No freeze this time. I didn’t even think about shoving a note under his door.

Dear James,

What we did today was really irresponsible. It can’t happen again. Perhaps it would be best if you found an alternative source of employment so we can make monkey love with less fear of discovery.

Sincerely, Kay

Okay, so I thought about the note, but I didn’t write it. Alright, I wrote it. But I threw it away. Besides, what could happen?

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May 21

Oh my god! I just reread the last entry and can I just say… PLENTY! Sure, today started out great. I hitched a ride in with James. It was convenient since he was the one to wake me up (wink, wink) and I got to work and my desk was clear! Blank! New! It was beautiful. You wouldn’t have believed it. No work. At first I thought, My day is made. It can’t get any better than this. But then I turned on my computer, drank a cup of coffee, and realized something. Work was boring when there was nothing to do. The realization didn’t do much for me since it didn’t solve my problem, and since it didn’t, I supposed I had to. I called Kenneth. “Hey, Kenneth. Something weird happened to me today. I’ve finished my work. There is nothing in my inbox, my outbox is full, everything’s going great here…And I’m bored. Do you have any projects you need help with? “As a matter of fact,” he said, “I do. Come on up. I’ll find something for you.” So I, of course, went up to his office. I walked in rubbing my hands together. I’d never realized how truly horrific a day of doing nothing could be. Okay, so I’d only been there a couple of hours, but that didn’t stop me from being massively bored. “What do you have for me?” I asked. And that’s when my whole world tipped on its axis. That’s when life as I knew it was done.

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“I can’t believe you have nothing to do in your division. Nobody’s ever gotten all their work done. I didn’t think it was possible. How are the numbers?” The numbers were good. We were doing really well. Selling loads, making and breaking offers, but, ultimately, coming out on top. “Better advances in this past year,” I said, pointedly, since I’d been in my position for about a year now, “than in any other year in the previous ten. We’re doing great.” “That’s good to hear,” he said, getting out of his chair and moving to the window to look out at the traffic below. “Good to hear.” He folded his hands behind his back and stared contemplatively out. “Did you know that Sean got canned?” “Sean?” I asked, racking my brains. Who the heck was Sean? “No. Why was he fired?” “He was having sexual relations on company property. On company time.” This made me pause. Fired, I thought. I couldn’t fathom it. Fired. Sure, it could happen. It could happen to Sean. It could happen to anyone, in fact, but it could never happen to me. I hoped. I made up my mind then and there to stop fooling around in the office. James lived across the hall from me. I could wait till I got home. I wasn’t an animal. I could wait. I could. Really. “We were thinking about offering the position to you. Except that I’m not sure you could handle it.” He paused and turned from the window to look at me. “Not that I don’t think you’re capable, because I know you are. You turned your division around. We thought it was going under, but you pulled it through. Much faster than anyone could have guessed. You’re amazing.” He moved to the mini bar along one side of the room. Poured himself a drink. “Do you want one?”

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I was still reeling from the shot about my being capable but not able to handle it, but I said yes. Maybe I said yes because I was reeling. What did that even mean? How could I be capable and not at the same time? “What’ll you have?” “Vodka rocks,” I said, and “What do you mean I can’t handle it?” “Well,” he said, sloshing vodka over ice, “I heard a little rumor about you. About your first day in your present position.” “Heard something?” I said and stood. I walked across the room and grabbed the drink from his fingertips. He’d left it dangling there, waiting to be given, but never crossed the room to give it to me. But I needed a drink and wasn’t too proud to go after it. The cold burn of the drink slipped down my throat, rough and smooth at the same time. The good stuff, I thought and took another swallow. I was going to need it. “What about my first day on the job?” Don’t say James, don’t say James, don’t say James… “A little birdie told me you might have taken some liberties with your secretary.” “Liberties?” I said, though by now, I thought I knew what he was talking about. One thing was sure, I wasn’t going to hang myself if I didn’t have to. If he was going to accuse me then he’d have to provide the proof. “I heard you and James had sex in your office.” Well. He didn’t seem to have any trouble coming out and saying it. But I’m glad he did. I needed it said. Now that it was out there, I could deal with it. One on one, me and him, we could deal with this. Something unspoken, something guessed at and talked around, you can never really handle. You can never get to the meat of it. It becomes some mysterious monster that stalks you in the dark, but something bald, talked about, laid out, scary as it is, but nothing is ever as bad as the shadow. You can never touch the shadow, the shadow never gets handled. Not really.

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“What do you think we should do about that?" I asked him. I was standing a foot away from him. One foot. And I could feel the heat rolling off him when I asked the question. His heat wrapped around me from a foot away and I wanted to vomit. He wanted me, he was probably going to have me, fuck me here in his leather filled office. One thing was for sure. My gag reflex still worked. “Of course, I’m going to say that I didn’t do anything untoward with James. That we’ve always had a very professional working relationship and that that the rumor is totally unfounded.” “Of course,” he said, placing his empty glass on the bar. “I’d expect nothing less. But then, as a concerned boss, I could say that I wanted to protect you. That I was worried about you. Worried you might have been taken advantage of. And, as a concerned boss, I felt it was my responsibility to protect you and took measures to ensure your safety. I had no choice but to install a video camera in your office.” He paused to gauge my response. I thought installing a video camera in my office was underhanded, but I wasn’t concerned. If he’d installed it after we had sex, then I was in the clear. Then I remembered. The dictation. Sucking him off and then climbing on top of him. Fucking him in the chair. His pencil rolling across the carpet. Oh no. When I looked back at Kenneth, he was smiling. He’d watched me? Us? He’d watched us? He flicked his wrist and a television behind the door turned on. A tape was playing. It was me, moaning on top of James, my breasts bouncing in his face. His hands were under my skirt, on my bare ass, covered incompletely by James’ big hands as he pulled me, repeatedly, onto his dick. The television clicked off. I turned to Kenneth, and tried to remain composed. It took a lot of effort, but I think I did alright. I think my next words came across fairly controlled, even if the

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occasional clinking of ice gave me away. “What do you want?” Something in his face changed and he reached a hand out, slowly, and touched the underside of my breast. He didn’t squeeze, he didn’t manhandle, he just hefted it. Tested the weight. Ran his thumb over my nipple which was, embarrassingly, fully erect. From watching myself with James, I assured myself. Not from Kenneth. “I think you know. Or you would if you thought about it.” His fingers left my body and he stepped closer. I made no resistance when his hand, instead of returning to my breast, moved to my ass. I didn’t even move when the other one followed. I noticed when he started to inch my skirt upward, when his fingers touched the bare skin on the top of my thighs. When they touched the bare skin of my ass around my thong. He was disgusting, breathing his hot breath on my face, getting so excited and pressing himself to me so that I felt the bulge of him through his pants. “You could have the promotion,” he said, “and the tape. It’s up to you.” He ground his pelvis into mine. Then his hands were gone and he again stepped back. This time he began unbuttoning my shirt. “Just a little quickie, in my office, every once in a while. James would never have to know, the guys upstairs would never have to know. You could have the tape.” When my blouse was unbuttoned he unsnapped the front hook of my bra and my breasts fell out. Large and luxurious, and not for him. Not for Kenneth. They were mine, and now James, but Kenneth was the one touching them. Putting his hands on them. When he tweaked a nipple, I slapped his hand away. “You can be promoted, Kay. Or you can be fired. It’s up to you.” But he didn’t touch me again. He walked back to his desk and sat down. “I’ll give you to the end of the week to decide how much you want that video tape. If you want it enough, you’ll be back. If you don’t…well, there are others who could be promoted. It all depends on who sees

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that video. Or really, who’s holding the video at the end of the week.” I buttoned up my shirt and pulled my skirt back into place. I grabbed my purse and left. On my way out, he said, “The end of the week, Kay. I won’t wait any longer.” I couldn’t believe it. Who would’ve thought that a couple little indiscretions could produce so many consequences? I’m in love with James. We’ve been together for almost a year, we’re talking about moving in together! About getting married! How many kids we’re going to have and what our house will look like. If we’ll live in the suburbs or the city. And look at me now. What am I going to do now? If I refuse to have sex with Kenneth then I’ll lose my job. We won’t have any way of getting that house. Of having those kids. He can’t support us on his salary. Oh yeah. He wouldn’t have a salary either. He was in the video tape. There’s no way he’d be able to keep his job. We’d both be out on the streets. I have to do something. I have to fix this somehow. I don’t want to have sex with Kenneth, but I don’t see another way out. I’ll think of something. I have to.

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May 23

This past couple days have been a nightmare. Kenneth keeps calling me to his office and getting friendly with me. Touching me. Making me walk around with my shirt open. It’s like living in a bad porno. “I dropped my pen over there. Could you pick it up for me? And don’t bend your knees.” And when I’m picking it up, knowing he can see at least part of my underwear, the part touching my crotch, he moans. Across the room from me, he moans. He’s gone over the moon. The man is stark raving mad, I’m sure of it. Today, when he called me into his office, he was jerking himself off! Who does that? I mean, who does that in front of people? Kenneth, obviously. Because he made me open my shirt and take off my bra. He touched me with one hand and jerked off with the other. “You could,” he panted, “answer me now. You could suck on my dick,” he said. “And that could be it.” “No thanks,” I said, and watched his meaty, hairy hands touch the soft white skin of my breast. And I watched his other hand jerk on his penis. He clamped down on my breast hard when his jizz flew from his body. It landed on the floor. I was so lost. I was so confused. I couldn’t reconcile the man in front of me, the idiot, the pervert, with the man who was so worried about company morale. About the happiness of his workers. Why was I the only one he wasn’t concerned with? How were his personal and professional personalities SO different? So contrary? Kenneth is a man I will never understand, and as his hand slips from my body and I start buttoning my shirt, I thank God for that. I needed a plan. And later that afternoon, sitting behind my desk and doodling, I

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had one. And it was perfect.

May 24

I woke up next to James this morning. His hands on my breast feel so much better, so much cleaner than Kenneth’s. “I need to tell you something,” I said. “What?” he kissed my neck. I told him. Everything. I told him about Kenneth, about his office on Monday, about Tuesday and even about Wednesday when he was jerking off in his office. I told him about my worries and my fears, about money and being fired and being so scared, and best of all, I told him about my plan. He wasn’t happy about any of it, in fact, he looked pretty pissed off. I didn’t want him to be mad at me. I probably should’ve told him sooner. I know some of the things I did this week could have been done differently, I’m sure I could’ve found a better way to deal with him, but I have no idea how. I had to wait for a plan. It doesn’t speak well of me that my plan came so late, especially when it was so simple, but it doesn’t matter, or it shouldn’t, because I had one now. No more letting him touch me. No more. No more after today.

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When we got to work the plan went immediately into action. James called up Kenneth’s secretary. “Hi. Kay needs to see Kenneth today. Are there any openings in his schedule? 11:30? Great. It’s a little early, but she doesn’t have a lunch appointment for today. Do you think you can arrange it?” he winked at me and nodded. “Great, great,” he said and hung up. “He’s got a late lunch today but it’s at four, so she doesn’t think he’ll have a problem meeting you that early. She said he’d call you back to tell you where.” He walked around the desk and placed a hand on mine. “Will you be alright?” I squeezed his hand. “Of course I will. Will you?”” “Me?” he asked, grinning, “There’s no doubt.” At 11:15 I headed out to Pacho’s deli. It was a cheaper place to take me, but since I wasn’t exactly the person he’d be wining and dining right now, I had to say, I kind of expected it. We ate at a counter in the middle of the room. Not where I’d have normally sat since I like to have conversations that aren’t overheard by the whole world, but today, I was glad he chose such an open spot. It meant that we didn’t have to talk about anything personal and any day out with him where personal didn’t come into it… pretty much better than any other day with him. “So,” he said, wrapping his hands around his wrap, “Have you given my proposal any more consideration?” “Proposal?” I said, but then I understood. “Yeah. That’s kind of what I wanted to talk to you about.” He took a bite of his wrap. “Shoot.” My next sentence, the mere thought of it, sickened me so much I pushed my food away from me. I hadn’t even picked it up yet. “There’s not a whole lot of options for me.

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I need the job. I can’t be the reason James is fired. I can’t be the reason I’m fired.” I swallowed and put a hand to my stomach. “As far as I can tell there’s only one thing I can do. I’m forced to accept your offer. No matter how horrible I think you are for asking it of me.” It was all couched in office talk so if anyone had overheard the conversation, they would’ve assumed we were talking business. Which, in a sad way, we were. He finished his wrap and I poked mine around the plate. I ended up throwing it away. We left Pacho’s and returned to the building. I followed him to his office, or rather, I was pushed there. An outside observer would’ve thought he had his hand on the small of my back as a support or some kind of helpful, directing thing, but he had his hand on the small of my back so he could push me along at a faster pace. Once we were in his office, he shut the door behind him and came directly for me. “What do you want me to do?” I asked, walking around the room and looking at his stuff as if I’d never been there before. “I want you to take off your shirt,” he said. I looked at a picture of his wife and kid as I unbuttoned my blouse. I turned away from the picture and threw the shirt on the couch. “Nice family,” I said. “Lift up your skirt and lean over my desk.” I could hear the boyish glee in his voice. His sense of entitlement. He thought he could tell me to do anything and I would do it. I guess he was right. I lifted my skirt and leaned over his desk. My butt was stuck high in the air because his desk was shorter than my legs. I probably looked a lot like a cat in heat. Good. He should have the full show. This was, I thought, going to be his last one. From me, anyway. He’d have nothing on me after today. I’d be free.

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And if what I was doing wasn’t exactly ethical? All I can say is, you do what you have to do. That’s all there is to it. You do what you have to do. “Lift up your skirt.” It had slipped down. I hiked it back up and as I did, I remembered the purple thong I’d put on that morning. What a waste, I thought, wearing those panties for him. He didn’t deserve them. I felt him come up behind me. Even before his hand traced the line of my underwear to my crotch, even before he dipped his finger ever so slightly in, I felt him. The rolling waves of heat and entitlement hit me before his flesh did. He undid my bra from behind and reached around my body to touch them more fully. To wrap his meaty, sweaty hands around them, to bring my back in contact with his shirt. He rolled my nipples inexpertly. Then, his hands leaving my body, I hear from behind a zipper unzip. The only other sound was the harsh and erratic whirr of his breathing. Hot and sweaty. I felt his dick touch me from behind. It didn’t probe my pussy lips, it more poked at my behind, as if he was aiming for the wrong hole. It doesn’t matter, I thought, turning around, since he’s not going to poke me anywhere. At least not until my questions are answered. I slid away from him and landed on top of his desk. “Take off your panties,” he said gruffly. I did. I wiggled my way out of them so I wouldn’t have to stand. When they were off, I kicked them to the side. “Now,” he said, “turn back around.” I didn’t. Of course I didn’t. I wasn’t going to put myself so totally at his mercy. He could do anything to me from that position, and I wouldn’t be able to fight back. Instead, I sat on his desk with my knees firmly shut and my skirt hiked up around my waist. “Not yet,” I said. “First, I want to get a few things straight with you. This will not

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happen a second time. I won’t have sex you with you after you give me the video tape, and you’ll give me the videotape today.” “Fine,” he said, too easily. I didn’t trust him at all. To blindly trust that he was giving me the original, that he hadn’t made any copies? I wasn’t a moron. “Swear you’ll give me that video tape if I sleep with you. Swear it.” “I swear. I’ll give you the tape and I won’t ask anything more of you. Now get down here and suck my dick.” “Wait,” I said, “there’s more. Swear that you’ll never use that tape to hurt me or James ever again. Swear I’ll get the promotion if I have sex with you.” “I swear I won’t use the tape again, and you’ll definitely be getting the promotion,” he said to my unleashed breasts. Well, at least he was talking. I looked at him for a long moment. “Thank you for promising me.” “No problem, hot cheeks, now step down and give me some lovin’.” “No,” I said, turning to pick up my bra. “I don’t think I will.” I put it on and looked at him. He was stupid, but nobody was as stupid as he looked right then. His pants were down around his ankles; his shirt tie and jacket were all on, his dick poking out from under the lip of his shirt. He looked so confused. I shook my head at him, hopped off the desk and put my underwear back on. “You can’t do this to me,” he said. “You can’t just leave me here like this. We had a deal. You’ll be fired. James will be fired. You’re history. You’ll never work in this business again.” “Oh,” I said, walking across the room to pluck my shirt off the couch, “I think I will.” As I was buttoning up my shirt, I explained the situation to him. “You see, I’ll not only work in this business again, but I’ll get that promotion. You can still make sure I get

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it. But afterward, you’ll be the one looking for another job. You’ll never return to this company, and you’ll give me all the copies of the tape of me and James.” “Huh,” he sneered. “Not likely.” “Very likely,” I countered and buttoned my last button. Then I walked around his desk and I sat in his chair. “You see,” I said, “you’re not the only one who can set up a video camera. And I have you on tape blackmailing and bribing me for sex. I have you on tape telling me that if I don’t have sex with you, I’m as good as fired. That if I sleep with you, I’ll get promoted.” Pants still around his ankles, his penis withering, Kenneth sank into the chair on the other side of the desk and put his head in his hands. “You can still work in the field though. Any other company would hire you in a heartbeat. Unless, of course, the tape I made becomes public. And it will, if the tape of me and James does.” I hit a button on his phone, “Yes…?” came James’ voice. “Could you come in here for a moment?” “Yes, ma’am,” he said and walked through the door. “Do you have the tape?” James went to Kenneth’s bookcase and pulled out a bear. “Oh, shit,” Kenneth said. “Right here” James said. He pulled a tape out of the bear’s back. “You can leave now, James. Oh, and make copies. Several of them.” When James left, Kenneth broke down.

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May 20

Well, dear diary, it’s been another year, and a far better year than the ones before. James and I got married a couple months ago. Oh, and of course, I’ve been promoted. Kenneth had himself transferred. James followed him and thanks to the tapes, James is now a highly paid executive in Kenneth’s new company. It’s funny really. Kenneth wanted to screw me, but I screwed him instead.

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Journals of Innocence Lost By Amethyst Knighte

March 13th, 2005 10:37 p.m.

I can’t believe I finally have the chance to start writing in a journal again, even if it is a public one! My dearest friends, Rico and Jonathan, are the owners of this awesome establishment called Innocence Lost. It’s a totally hot night club that has garnered the attention of many a celebrity and critic, and always come out on top, which is why I was so surprised that I was the one they asked to submit the first entry into their Journals of Innocence Lost. They came up with the idea to put this laptop up in the bar so peeps can jot down their deepest, darkest secrets for the world to read. Hell, aren’t they going to be surprised when they read my entries! Not that I plan on entering anything too raunchy or ghastly. God forbid! It’s just that I have something to say that they wouldn’t expect – or at least I don’t think they suspect it. Then again, with those two, you never know. Anyway, as far as keeping a journal goes, it’s been ages since I had the chance to keep one, and that has been years too long if you ask me. I used to keep a diary when I was a little girl, and I filled it with all of the usual things. My private thoughts, dreams, my first crush; you name it. Boy, I tell ya, did I ever freak out when I found my mother reading it one afternoon, too! I threw the temper tantrum to end all temper tantrums and wound up receiving a spanking I still remember to this very day. But the days of my childhood are over, my family long gone, and I’m an adult now obviously. I have been for quite a while, having celebrated my thirtieth birthday a few months ago, but there’s one thing that has bothered me for all that time. I’m still young, relatively pretty if you go by the stares and comments I get when I go out or on dates, but I have a wee situation going on here.

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At the ripe old age of thirty, I feel like I’m the world’s oldest freakin virgin. Hey, it’s by personal choice, not because I’m a prude or anything…or not entirely, at least. So I was raised by conservative – read very old-fashioned here – parents. That doesn’t mean that I don’t feel the same urges and desires that everyone else does. Believe me, I do. It just makes me a wee bit more reluctant to drop my panties the moment I find myself alone with a man I just met. This chica doesn’t play that way is all. Anyhow, it’s been a bitch of a week. Even though I work from home at the moment as a Medical Transcriptionist, there is one particular doctor that gives me a ration of shit no matter how flawless my finished product is. Good ol’ Dr. Osterman, the bane of my existence, is in more need of getting laid than any ten people I know. He’s such a total asshole it's un-fucking-believable! I’ve never in my life met or worked with or for anyone who has tempted me into so much anger and violence; so much so that I’ve actually been tempted to put my keyboard through the fucking monitor! Employer of the year he’s not, that’s for sure. A minimum of twice a week he’ll call me up and rake my ass over the coals about my interpretation of his transcriptions, which leads to me having to pull up and go over all of my files, which damn near leads to my going postal on his sorry ass. When I prove to him just how wrong he is about the errors he thinks I made, which in fact he's the one who's so fucked up he couldn't find his way out of a torn up paper bag, do you think I get an apology for his rudeness or for his screaming at me on the phone for the past hour if not longer? I’ll tell you what; you’ve got three guesses as to the answer to that question, and the first two don’t count. If it wasn’t for his nurse, an absolutely wonderful woman by the name of Moreen whom I have come to treasure as a dear friend and confidante, I would have long ago tossed his account in the circular file and given him a piece of my mind. I would have told him exactly what he could do with his damned transcriptions and his freakin temper, too, but hey, that’s just me. One of these days I will, and I’m really looking forward to that day, too. I get the feeling Moreen will be standing right there beside me, laughing her ass off, her own

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resignation neatly typed up on her favorite teddy bear stationery, and prepared to give him a piece of her own mind after I get done with my little tirade. Hell, she might even beat me to the punch. As long as I get to see his face, I don’t care who goes first. Well, I’m here at the bar, obviously, and typing away at the keyboard; as if I haven’t put in enough time at my own computer this week. A promise is a promise, though, so it’s really no skin off my nose to start this off for Rico and Jonathan. I really don’t know where to start other than what I’ve already stated. I got all cleaned up and dressed in my favorite black leathers before coming to the bar tonight, which I don’t wear too often if I know it’s going to be a busy night. I don’t like to risk getting beer or other alcoholic beverages spilled on them. The stench tends to stay with you forever if you don’t get them cleaned properly after such a catastrophe. Jonathan, that lovely, lovely man and Rico’s partner for the past four years, had taken my measurements and hand-made my leathers for me. They consisted of low-riding pants that tied at the hips with long, leather laces, and a matching short vest that tied up the front and had delicate fringes that hung down to tease my stomach just above my belly button. There are tiny silver bells attached to the ends of the leather ties, so I make light, tinkling sounds when I move. I love it, personally, and I admit that at times I take a perverse pleasure in slapping inquisitive hands away from the sparkling music makers. Jon had taken the extra time to show me how to tie an intricate little knot he had come up with in order to keep the drunks and other idiots and assholes on the dance floor from untying my clothes, and I kiss him on the cheek in thanks every time I wear them. The last time it had been a drunken, overzealous woman that had tried to relieve me of my vest. I had never been so embarrassed or so relieved at the same time for that special little knot! Embarrassed for the woman, since she was so far gone that she didn’t realize she was trying to undress me in a public place; for myself, since I didn’t swing that way at all; and relieved because the knots had held, keeping her from baring my assets, such as they are, to the club and the world in general. Hey, I might not have much upstairs in the breast department, being no larger than a

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B cup since forever, but that doesn’t mean I expect to have myself stripped down in front of a group of single men and women just so they can get a couple of cheap thrills. Well, I’ve been at this journal long enough for one night, and besides, they’ve started up some good dancing music. I’ve had the week from hell, so I think I deserve a night filled with a bit of light drinking and kick-ass dancing, don’t you? I’ll continue this later. Toodles!

Amethyst

March 15th, 2005 2:45 a.m.

Did I really just start writing in this electronic journal the other night, or was it all a wild figment of my overactive imagination? Don’t get me wrong here, because I don’t hold to Friday the 13th being a bad luck day or anything like that. I’m really not superstitious at all. For some reason I simply had the strangest night last night – and I don’t know whether it’s a good kind of strange or a bad kind of strange yet. I’m hoping for the best, but keeping my mind open to all of the possibilities. The first people I ran into were the usual, of course, Rico and Jonathan. The two of them are the sweetest couple I have come across in years, and that’s saying something in these times we live in. I can’t wait until their marriage ceremony is over with, though, but only because I have to wear a fucking dress for it. It could be worse, I suppose. The dress

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could’ve been pink tulle! Just thinking about it is enough to make me shudder. Eesh! I was immediately pulled into several pairs of arms, one right after the other, until I was starting to feel like a damned set of bagpipes or something. The air was getting squeezed out of my lungs almost faster than I could pull it in. It was for sure I was running out of air, because the last person who grabbed me was Jonathan, bless his heart, and he never did know how hard he was squeezing, he's so strong. My eyes were practically bulging out of their sockets and my face turning red when I whapped the back of his head as hard as I could. “Jonathan, dude, air becoming an issue here!” I gasped, whacking him upside the head another time just for good measure. Practically in a panic, Jon nearly dropped me in his haste to release me, settling me on my usual seat with trembling hands in the corner. “Honey bunny, I am so sorry! I don’t know my own strength sometimes, I swear. Are you okay? Do you need more air? Move the fuck away from the bar, you fucking degenerates! The lady needs more air!” he shouted, startling several of the patrons close by into running for cover. Jon’s temper was well known at the bar and everyone knew to get out of his way when he roared like the alpha lion he resembled when he was pissed off or frightened. In this instance, he was freaked and it showed just a wee tad. At six feet five inches tall with beautiful dark blond hair that hung in a heavy flow down to the lower ridge of his shoulder blades, intense icy blue eyes, and a solidly muscled body that any weightlifter would be jealous of, Jonathan was a sexy piece of work. He was also completely devoted to his life-partner, Rico, and had been for the past four years. There were very few people who would go up against Jon in a dark alley, let alone in his own club. He was very effective as a bouncer as well, most of the time able to break up a fight simply by pulling the offenders apart and scowling darkly at them. Jon also owned and ran one of the most successful Harley Davidson dealership and repair shops in the state. He could pretty much custom build one blindfolded, he was so attuned to the bikes, and not a single biker or other customer that came across him gave a shit that he happened to be gay. Jon sure didn’t look it, not that there was or should be a stereotypical look for a gay

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or lesbian, but all of his scars, tattoos and piercings, as well as his drop-dead gorgeous looks, had people of both sexes drooling over him wherever he went. Luckily, Rico wasn’t the jealous type. Sweet, doe eyed Rico, all five feet eight inches of him, was just the opposite of Jonathan, and I truly believe that if they hadn’t gotten together four years ago that he’d be six feet under right now. Rico’s last partner, a sick bastard by the name of Greg Ford, had taken entirely too much pleasure in beating and abusing Rico while they were together. I had spent one hell of a lot of time both taking Rico to the hospital and visiting him there while he was recuperating from broken bones, cracked ribs and dislocated limbs; you name it, he'd had it at least twice. Unfortunately, like most abused partners, he had repeatedly and most vociferously refused to prosecute and had made up the usual hair-brained excuses and completely unbelievable stories about how he had received the injuries. All because of one thing; he was utterly in love with the abusive, sadistic bastard. It had taken until Greg had nearly killed him that last time for it to finally convince him to press charges against his lover and end the abusive relationship once and for all. The fact that Greg had hit me several times as well when I had come upon him beating Rico half to death had helped him make up his mind, also. That and he knew he couldn’t talk me out of pressing charges against the prick either. I had worn those bruises and my split lip proudly, just for the fact that the slimy loser would never have the opportunity to hurt my sweet, kind-hearted friend ever again. I was so proud of Rico during the trial and sentencing, which wound up happening immediately afterwards, much to our surprise. Because of the medical history his lawyer, doctor, and the hospitals had been able to supply, our testimony and, surprisingly, Greg’s criminal record that we hadn’t known a damned thing about; the judge had thankfully put him away for life under California’s Three Strikes law. It seems that dear ol' Greg had quite an extensive history of violence against people. Surprise, surprise! His past record included three past stints behind bars in the state of California, all of them not too long before the Three Strikes law had come into effect. He

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had served two stints for assault with intent to do great bodily harm, and one that shocked all of us to the core. Greg had somehow managed to plead his last arrest down from second-degree murder to involuntary manslaughter. Not so this time. Since this was being tried as a Three Strikes case, the prosecutor had refused to allow him to plead out. Those of us that testified against him had stared the bastard straight in the eye as we did so, showing him how unafraid we were now that justice was finally being done. He fought and threw a fit when the Foreman of the jury read the guilty verdict, threatening to kill us all. Yet when the judge told him his sentence, surprisingly he calmed right down, his face taking on a hurt look. The only thing he couldn’t change was his eyes. They were dead cold and held as much life as a corpse. He turned to look at Rico and the sad look in his eyes was as bogus as the crocodile tears that slid into his gray-streaked, mousy brown beard. “Rico, baby, you know I didn’t do this to you. How could you lie like this to the judge and everyone else? Did you hear how long they’re putting me away for? I’ll never be free again. Don’t you love me?” “I’m not going to fall for your lies ever again, Gregory. You’ve beaten and abused me for the last time. It was bad enough that I let you do that to me for the five and a half years that we were together, but when you turn around and try to kill my friends as well, that’s it. No more lies, Gregory. This wasn’t the first time that you almost killed me, but this is for damn sure the last time. You’re getting what you deserve, and I won’t lie for you ever again,” Rico said, his voice as laden with sadness as his chocolate brown eyes. His eyes cold as an arctic winter, Greg glared at his former lover for several moments. When the guards took hold of his arms to escort him from the courtroom his lips pulled back in a fierce rictus as he began to struggle against their restraining hands. “You fucking bitch. It doesn’t matter what hole they put me in, you know. I’ll get all of you for this, and I’ll get your little whore of a friend, too. I’m talking about you, Amy. Fucking frigid little puta. I’ve got special plans for your tight, interfering ass. You ever been gang-banged, whore? Better get ready for it, because it’s coming for you real soon! Nobody puts me behind bars and lives. Nobody! Get your fucking hands off of me, you pricks!”

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The courtroom erupted in chaos as the guards forcibly dragged Greg off to prison, the judge hammering his gavel against his wooden block in a vain attempt to regain control as Rico turned to take me into his arms. He had been genuinely frightened for me rather for himself, which I had thought was rather sweet at the time, but I had quickly come to realize that it was simply a measure of his loving, trusting personality that had gotten him into this situation to begin with. That was over six years ago and I still have the occasional nightmare about it. So does Rico, from what Jon tells me. Rico has always been a lover, not a fighter, and he gives of his whole heart when he gets to know someone. I think that’s why Greg chose him to begin with. He must’ve seen him as easy pickings, a cute Latin boy with a shaved head, a shy look in his doe brown eyes, and soft, full lips that curved so beguilingly when he smiled. He’s built lean and sleek like a professional cyclist but a little bit bulkier, which makes sense since he rides in marathons all over the world whenever he’s not too busy running the bar. The bulky part is because of the past four years with the love of his life, Jonathan. It’s all been terribly romantic; seeing them going through their awkward, getting-to-know-you stage, then their trial move-in stages – there has been more than one, trust me! – and finally they had announced their engagement. The part that had brought tears to my eyes was when they had asked me to be their Bitch-of-Honor at the wedding. Now all they had to do was find their Best Bastard and it would be all set up. Yeah, yeah, I know it sounds funny, but if you knew them it would all sound perfectly sane. That’s just their cornball sense of humor, and I’m even worse than they are. The only problem I had about being their BoH at the wedding was that I was going to have to wear a fucking dress. Ugh! I might be a woman, but I’ve always been a bit of a tomboy. I hate wearing dresses, no matter how great they make me look. Rico has even fixed me up with make-up and all for a wedding I had to attend a few years ago and, while even I will grudgingly admit that I looked like a few million bucks, I still feel more at home in my sweats or ratty jeans. Innocence Lost, Rico and Jonathan's nightclub and bar, is the local hot spot for

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those under forty and offers an eclectic arrangement of music styles for its patrons. You never could tell what kind of music you would find playing from one night to the next, and that is what keeps people coming in. Variety is the spice of life, and the boys know just how to please their patrons, working their collective asses off to keep Innocence Lost the hottest club in town. The drinks are priced decently and they never water them down like some clubs were known to do. No drugs are allowed inside or on the property, and they have managed by the grace of God to keep any minors from getting inside so far. In a time when drug and alcohol abuse are so rampant, Innocence Lost is seen as a safe haven, even if its name implies otherwise. If you are drinking, you hand over your car keys or you aren’t served. Drunks are never served. Period. Anyone caught selling alcohol to drunks is fired on the spot, no matter how busy the place is or what the excuse. That’s just the way Jonathan is. After seeing so many of his buddies go out on drugs and alcohol, Jonathan had his eyes opened wide, his innocence lost as it was, and it was in their memory that he had opened up the club. Rico had seen what an impact his past had upon him and supported him two hundred percent, running the place with Jonathan. They have healed each other over the years, and now they are determined to heal others by not letting them fall down the same path if they can. A few of their success stories work in the club as waiters and waitresses, a couple others as bouncers, all of them attending mandatory AA and NA meetings, since staying clean and sober is part of their employment agreement. After an extended bullshit session, I finally extracted myself from Rico and Jonathan’s clutches, heading out to the dance floor for a few solo dances. It was a freeing experience in more ways than one, to expend all that cooped-up energy that had been building up these past couple of weeks, so I was a bit more flamboyant with my moves on the floor. I had logged out of the journal last night after spending a rather calming hour typing. It had actually surprised me that venting as I had done had calmed me down so

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much. From there I threw back the last of my drink and hopped off my seat, prepared to enjoy myself to the fullest, which I had done for the most part. The last person I was prepared to run into was someone who would turn my life upside down as quickly and effectively as one Michael Black Wolf would. I had done a few stints on the dance floor, had a couple of drinks that were very light on the alcohol, and chatted it up with Rico, Jonathan and several of my friends there at the bar. It was when I had hopped off my bar stool to go out for yet another round of dancing that I quite literally bumped into what had to be the most gorgeous Native American man I had ever seen in my entire life, and that’s saying something with the number of powwow’s I’ve attended over the past decade or so. Whuh! I kid you not, if he hadn’t reached out and grabbed hold of my waist with his huge hands I would’ve landed flat on my ass, I bounced that hard off of his solidly muscled body. The man was that seriously stacked! Rubbing my now sore nose, which had connected rather hard with his six-pack of all things, my eyes began their slow trek upwards until I could see his face. I kept looking up…and up…and oh, my stars and garters was he ever a tall drink of water! He had the most beautiful almond shaped obsidian eyes in that stern face of his, a hawkish nose, firm, straight lips that were now parting in the most wicked grin as he stared down at me, revealing straight white teeth. He also had the cutest set of dimples on either side of his mouth when he smiled. Oh, I just knew I was going to fall hard for this man, and I groaned under my breath at the injustice of it all. The way my luck tended to run, this gorgeous hunk of male flesh would be either married, in a long-term relationship, or gay. Damn it, it wasn’t fair at all! “I'm sorry. I should have been watching where I was going,” he said, his voice as deep and smooth as the finest Scottish single malt whiskey. It had the same bite as well, and I could feel a hard shiver work its way down my spine as he spoke. I was becoming aroused just by the sound of his voice. Should that even be possible? Judging by the tingling and tightness I was feeling in my breasts and farther down between my thighs –

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I’d say yeah. At the very least this man should be declared illegal! Blushing from head to toe, I stared up at him and shoved a few strands of my long black hair that had managed to escape my French braid behind my ear. It was either push my hair back or jump him and bury my fingers in all of that gorgeous blue-black hair of his. Have I mentioned before how long hair on a man that can really carry it off just lights my fire? Well, it does, and somehow I managed to open my mouth and get out a halfway decent reply, thank God. “I’m the one who should be apologizing to you, not the other way around. I just hopped off the bar stool and slammed right into you without even checking to see if anyone was coming. It was all my fault, not yours. I’m really sorry, Mr. …?” I asked, waiting for this man that already had my nether regions all aflutter to introduce himself. I had a burning desire to know who this man was and where I could find him again if the need arose. Judging by the bulge that was steadily growing below the waistline of his dark brown leather pants, a need he didn’t even try to hide or disguise, he didn’t need to worry about the need rising any time soon. He was already there, and way more than large enough as it was. Holy shit, was that thing even real? A knowing smile curled the corners of his sensual mouth, revealing that set of devastating twin dimples as he kneaded my waist for several spine-tingling moments, his thumbs angling lower on my belly and causing my body to jerk as a strong bolt of pleasure slammed through me. He switched tactics then, slowly easing his heated hands from my waist and taking hold of my hands. Intertwining our fingers, he kissed the backs of my hands, nibbling and licking every inch of the delicate flesh before easing them over to repeat the intimate caresses on my palms. My heart was already beating a mile a minute, my breathing accelerating as he pulled my fingers inside his mouth one by one to lick and suckle them. Tiny, panting gasps escaped my slightly parted lips as he moved on to my wrists, giving me little love bites on that delicate flesh. Before I could do more than frown, he kissed and licked away the slight pain. Oh, but when he released one of my hands and slid his free hand down to my lower back, drawing light circles on the exposed skin he found there, the only thought on my mind was – please, don’t ever let him stop!

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It didn’t even register in my mind that he had led me onto the dance floor until he spun us around, pulling me against the burning heat of his body in order to protect me from being slammed into by a rather inconsiderate couple that wasn’t watching what the hell they were doing or where they were going. There wasn’t a single hair on that magnificent expanse of bare chest I was pressed against, just smooth, bronzed skin that radiated enough heat to keep a woman warm on the coldest night, I could well imagine. Damn, would I ever love to find out what that felt like, I thought. Then I mentally slapped myself, since I still didn’t even know his freakin’ name for cryin’ out loud! “My name is Michael Black Wolf. Will you tell me your name while we dance, flower eyes?” he asked, releasing my hand and gently wrapping it around my waist as he waited for my response. My eyes shot up to his so fast I damn near gave myself a case of whiplash. What the hell? Had he read my mind or something? How could he have known what I was thinking, let alone answer it so quickly? My face must’ve given away my current dilemma, because all of a sudden I felt a finger beneath my chin, lifting it until my teeth connected. I blushed, my face turning at least twenty-seven different shades of red in my current state of embarrassment, but he wouldn’t even allow me that. “You have absolutely nothing to be upset about, sweetheart. I’ve never felt this strong a connection before, especially not upon first meeting a beautiful woman like yourself, but I have to admit I find your blushes endearing. Come now, won’t you grant your ardent admirer a boon and tell me your name?” We were already dancing by this time, only I didn’t realize it until long afterwards. It also didn’t hit me until after I replied to his question that my feet were no longer even touching the floor. Michael had simply picked me up by the waist and settled my limp, unresisting body against his, swaying gently to the slow music. How long we stood there like that I have no idea, but even when the music sped up again he simply stood there, swaying slowly, holding my gaze with his. I finally told him my name and from there we engaged in some frivolous small talk, sometimes not even talking at all. It was the most romantic time I think I have ever had in my life, and yet I

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could feel my body react to his in such a fiercely carnal way that all I wanted to do was throw him to the floor in front of all and sundry and simply rape the man. If his body was any indication of how he felt, he wouldn’t fight me, either. I could feel his huge erection against my thighs and it terrified me as much as it aroused me. I had always known that my first time would be painful, and I knew that not all men were created equal, but it seemed as if Michael had been given the lion’s share. I had no idea if he would even fit inside of me! Michael leaned towards me, even closer than he had done before, and I could read his intent as clear as day. The man intended to kiss me right there in the middle of the dance floor and I could tell that this wouldn’t be some polite little peck on the lips, either. This would be sheer carnality as its basest, and I could hardly wait. My breath hitched in my throat, the tip of my tongue darting out to dampen my suddenly dry lips, and with a groan he covered my lips with his own. His tongue surged past the slight opening left behind by my retreating tongue, thrusting and parrying even as he mapped out every part of my mouth. I was so overcome by the power and sensation behind his demanding kiss that at first I couldn’t even reciprocate. I simply allowed him to mold me, to lead me wherever he wanted me to go. It was only when I felt the sensation of cool air against my back that my eyes opened, blinking rapidly to adjust to the bright light in the room I now found myself in. I pulled away from the kiss somehow, but Michael simply continued down my jaw, nibbling and biting, kissing and licking his way to the long line of my throat where my pulse hammered its frantic rhythm. I forced myself to ignore some of what he was doing to me – somehow – and focused on my surroundings. The teal and purple carpeting, the mirrors, the upholstered chairs – all of it was so very familiar and brought home to me exactly where I was. We were in the freakin’ ladies’ bathroom! “Umm, Michael? We – oh! – We can’t do this. For one, we-we’re in the ladies’ room – Mmmm!” He was so playing dirty! Michael had one hand on my ass, grinding our lower bodies together while he gave me the mother of all hickies against the middle of my throat. It was when he moved to the other side of my throat, his lips, teeth and tongue

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working to give me a matching love bruise that I thrust my hands into that long, luxurious hair and held him tight against me, grinding my pussy against his heavy, throbbing erection. I could feel a wild orgasm coming on and I didn’t want to miss a second of it. My thighs were squeezing and releasing rhythmically against his on the love seat and I could feel my juices coating the inside of my leathers copiously. Did I care at that particular moment in time? Yeah, right. I don’t think so! I wouldn’t have cared if anyone had walked in on us at that particular moment in time. I was burning up inside and so far gone by then, all I wanted was relief of some kind, any kind. “For the other?” Michael said, nipping and licking his way down to my collarbones after leisurely inspecting my throat on both sides and smiling in satisfaction. He lightly scraped the flesh over my collarbones with his teeth, licking away the slight sting. “What?” I asked, my mind having lost its train of thought a long time ago. I didn’t give a rat’s ass what I’d been arguing with Michael about earlier. All I wanted to do now was rid myself of this pesky virginity of mine, and Michael was the perfect man for the job as far as I was concerned. Lord knew he lit all of my fires, and from what I could tell, I lit a few of his as well. It worked for me! Michael began to chuckle, his bare, heated flesh vibrating against mine and causing all sorts of electrical currents to flood my system. What made it all worse was the fact that I was feeling all of his bare flesh against my bare flesh, and I had not a clue as to how it had come to be that way. Pressing against his shoulders with trembling hands, a slight frown on my face, I was surprised that Michael actually allowed me to move back a few inches. Sure enough, my vest was untied and wide open; my torso completely bared to his every wanton desire. What was worse was the fact that the ties on my pants were completely undone as well and his hot, huge hands were slowly easing them down my hips and towards my thighs. I hadn’t even noticed that! I raised shocked eyes up to his in order to rip him a new one, but the only thing that came out of my mouth was a choked scream of pleasure. I felt his fingers plunge between my thighs, his thumb flicking my clit as his fingers began to tease my inner folds. How to explain what I was feeling when I pulled my way

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up his body just enough to prop my knees on his thighs and facilitate his shoving my pants down to my knees? I had definitely become passion-drunk, an emotion I had never felt before, but was quickly coming to enjoy. “Hang on a moment, baby,” he whispered in my ear, his hands working furiously behind me. The next thing I knew my boots, pants and vest had gone flying and I was once again straddling a fully clothed Michael Black Wolf. Suddenly finding myself as naked as the day I was born and straddling a man’s erect body, all of my insecurities and shyness came rushing back. I lowered my head, using one arm to cover my small breasts and my free hand to cover my pubis. If my hair hadn’t been in its usual braid I would’ve pulled it over my shoulders and used it to cover my nudity as well. To give him credit, Michael didn’t laugh at me or blow a gasket. He simply smiled at me, gently pressing one hand against my cheek and easing my face up for a kiss on the forehead. I was startled by the gesture, to say the least, but grateful nevertheless. It was a shaky one, but I managed to give Michael a tremulous smile as he reached behind me to play with my hair. It seemed like only a matter of seconds had passed, but when he pulled his hands away my hair came with him. Damn, but the man had quick hands! “You are a beautiful woman, Amy. There’s no reason for you to hide your body from me. Won’t you show me the present I have unwrapped for us both? Didn’t you enjoy the pleasures we have encountered so far?” I couldn’t exactly argue with him there, so there wasn’t much else to do except allow him to gently pull my arm away from my breasts. Oh, but he definitely made it worth my while! For several minutes he feasted upon my tender flesh, going back and forth between each small mound with his lips, teeth and tongue until they were swollen and tight. My nipples were erect and wet, aching and throbbing from his suckling. While he nursed on one taut nipple his other hand would plump up the other breast, plucking and lightly pulling on the nipple so it wouldn’t feel neglected. The ache between my legs had intensified tenfold, my left hand squeezing and rubbing against my mound almost involuntarily while Michael paid such loving attention

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to my breasts. I could feel the slickness of my juices coating my fingers and my hips jerked forward. My breath caught in my throat as the heel of my hand pressed against my swollen clit. I didn’t know how much more of this torment I could take! Then Michael took hold of my wrist, gently pulling my hand away from my mons. He noticed the glistening proof of my desire coating my hand and fingers as he brought my hand close to his face and inhaled, pulling my scent deep into his lungs. His beautiful obsidian eyes became heavy lidded, passion flooding his features. I tried to pull my hand away from his face, embarrassed at having him smelling my essence, yet I couldn’t help but be turned on at the same time. “Mmmm. I knew you would smell sweet,” he purred, his nostrils flaring as he pulled my hand even closer to his face. Then he began to lick my fingers and hand, cleaning away the proof of my desire for him and his touch, and I couldn’t contain the cry of passion that tore its way from my throat. “That’s it, Amy. Scream for me. Come for me.” It didn’t take him long to untie his leathers and free his massive erection, the thick stalk springing free from its confines and resting flat against his stomach. The purple tip was weeping copious amounts of pre-ejaculate and Michael used it to lubricate his hand as he stroked the great length his throbbing cock. I moaned along with him as he stroked his penis, the shiny, massive beast fascinating and frightening all at the same time. Tentatively I reached out and touched him, wrapping my fingers around him and squeezing gently as I had seen him do to himself. He was too big for me to wrap my small fingers around completely, but oh, how wondrous it felt to touch him! He felt like the softest satin over a rod of heated steel, and I let my hand travel along his length, all the while applying pressure. Soon thereafter I heard him hiss loudly, his back arching as my fingers tightened around his heated flesh. I couldn’t pull my fingers from his cock fast enough when I heard and felt him react so harshly to my inexperienced touch. “I-I’m sorry, Michael. I didn’t mean to hurt you,” I said, my entire body shaking as I started to pull back into my shell once again. So much for my fieldtrip into the wild side, huh? But, lo and behold, the best was yet to come.

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“No, baby, you were doing just fine. I made that sound because it was such a sweet pain. If you had really hurt me, you’d know it, believe me. Now, give me your hand and I’ll show you exactly how to touch me.” After that he showed me how to touch and stroke him, and the moans, groans and shouts that I pulled from this gorgeous man over the next several minutes made me very happy indeed. I wasn’t very happy when he stopped me, but there wasn’t much I could do about it. “Amy, if you keep this up, it's going to be over with before we get to the good part,” he said, a tight, very strained chuckle escaping his throat. I admit to staring at him with one hell of a lot of doubt showing on my face, but once he put that agile hand back between my thighs, I quickly lost my train of thought. It was when I let out my own hiss that Michael pulled back; only this time there wasn’t any doubt about what had happened. He knew damn good and well that he had hurt me, even if I refused to acknowledge it. I just wanted him to continue, but he was staring at me as if I had suddenly grown two heads or something. Michael’s hand was still between my legs so I leaned forward, rubbing my clit over the heel of his hand and trying to get him to just move. It felt so wonderful, and for several moments he allowed me to continue, getting back into the mood himself – until he inserted his finger again and I hissed in pain once more. This time he pulled out gently, at least. “Amy,” he said, and his voice was very even as I recall. Too even, and that’s what scared me. “Mmm-hmm,” I murmured in reply, keeping my head resting against his chest, my ear over his furiously pounding heart. Please, oh please, don’t let him stop now! I thought, close to tears. I just knew that if he stopped now I would never find another to bring me to these heights again. “Amy, look at me,” he said, his voice becoming stern. I looked up at him, dread flooding my heart as I struggled to keep my face blank. “How long has it been since your last lover?” Bzzzt – wrong question! I thought, wincing as I fought with what to tell him. If I gave him some kind of pat answer and he got pissed off at me when he found out the

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truth, he’d probably never forgive me and I’d never forgive myself. Then again, if I told the truth and he stopped things now before things went any further – hell’s bells! Either way I was going to wind up losing from what I could tell. “Do you promise not to get mad at me?” I whispered as I pulled a lock my hair forward, playing with it between my fingers, my head lowered. He sighed, lowering his head to rest against mine and tightening his arms around me a little. His long hair fell around us and I shivered, the feel of its silky weight against my bare skin nearly more than I could stand in my present state of arousal. “Now what could you possibly have to tell me that would piss me off to the extent that I would toss you to the floor and walk out of this room without making love to you, Amy? I can’t think of a single thing that would stop…” “I haven’t had any lovers,” I whispered against his chest, beginning to tremble when he ceased talking and froze against me. “Say that again?” he demanded, pushing me away from his chest and staring down into my eyes. He had the most intense look on his face, those sensual lips flattened into a thin line as he waited for my reply. I could feel him pulling away from me and I mourned the loss already. “I haven’t had any lovers,” I said, my voice cracking slightly. Tears started to slip from the corners of my eyes and slid slowly down my cheeks as I lay there and waited for our closeness to begin its inevitable slide downhill. “I’m a virgin.” “You haven’t been this close with any other man but me,” he said, and it was more of a statement than a question. All I could do was shake my head no and cry silently. His face was so harsh, so bereft of emotion while my heart was breaking. I was humiliated, and all I wanted to do now was crawl under a rock somewhere and forget tonight had ever happened. “Please, let me go. I-I just want to get dressed and go home. I won’t tell anyone about what happened here. Just…” “Let you go? Why would I do something as lame-brained as that? We’re not even close to being finished here tonight, sweet Amy. Now sit on this chair as I instruct you to and don’t move. I want to watch you while I undress.”

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I must have had a massive brain fart because Michael had to close my mouth again since I was sitting there on his lap with my jaw practically on my chest in shock. He carried me over to one of the upholstered chairs, settling me on the very end with my legs propped over the arms. I was as vulnerable as if I was awaiting a pap test, and I absolutely hated not knowing what was going on. Then again, Michael soon corrected my ignorance. “Yeah, that’s it. I like seeing your pussy bare, all smooth and wet and ready for me. You’re going to keep it that way for me, aren’t you, baby? Just for me?” he said as he slipped his fingers into my wet pussy, circling my clit and teasing my folds. I was whimpering with pleasure, my legs clenching and releasing against the arms of the chair. Michael showed me no mercy, his free hand pressing against my lower stomach, just above my bare mound, to hold me down no matter how hard I tried to thrust up and into his erotic touch. Then he did something I had never even dreamed about. His fingers parted the lips of my labia and his mouth settled over my clit before I could even pull in a breath with which to protest. Michael would look up at me from his position between my thighs from time to time, but for the most part he simply feasted on me. He licked and sucked and nipped my clit, easing his finger in and out of my pussy until I no longer felt any pain. Soon he was able to work a second finger inside of me, though it proved to be uncomfortable for a while. His talented tongue guaranteed that I didn’t mind the intrusion of the extra digit one little bit as I screamed my way through one orgasm after another. My body was limp and trembling and glistening with sweat by the time he had finished with me – or at least I thought he had finished with me. Was I ever wrong about that! “Michael, no more. Please. I can’t t-take – Please,” I whimpered, my voice hoarse from all the shouting, my head slowly rocking from side to side as I struggled to get my breathing under control. He placed a final, deep, wet kiss against my well-loved pussy and pulled away, licking his glistening lips. I could see my juices coating the lower portion of his face and I blushed. Michael didn’t seem to mind. In fact, he wiped his face with his fingers, holding my eyes the entire time he licked them clean. It made my breasts tighten, my cunt ache and spasm in renewed passion watching the erotic show he put on for me and he damn well knew it. Only when he had assured

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himself of my complete and undivided attention did he flash me that wicked, sensual smile of his and saunter over to the sink to wash up before returning to me once more. I tell you, I could have watched that fine onion of his all night long, I was so entranced. Oh, have I not told you about onions before? There's actually a joke that goes along with it that I've found applies to men just as well as it does to women, since that's who it originally was written about, and it goes kinda like this. You know what you get when you cross an onion with a donkey? A piece of ass so fine it brings tears to your eyes. Mmm mmm. I rest my case. “I’m sorry, Michael. I can’t seem to move my legs just yet,” I told him when he returned and knelt between my thighs once more. “Can you help me?” It was his wicked smile that told me I wasn’t quite out of danger yet. I peeked down towards his groin and didn’t need to make it as far as his belly button before I spotted the wet, engorged head of his penis lying hard and throbbing against his rock hard stomach. Something told me he wasn’t quite done with me for the night, and my terror came back at the sheer size of him. My emotions must have been showing on my face for the entire world to see, because Michael chuckled, sliding his arms beneath my back and shoulders as he eased my limp body into a more upright position. When our bodies met we both pulled in sharp breaths of air at the electrifying contact. “Don’t worry, Amy. We were made for each other. I’ll fit. Trust me,” he said just before claiming my lips in a soul deep kiss. I could taste myself on his tongue as he began to thrust in and out of my mouth in a sensual dance as old as time. It wasn’t nearly as bad as I had thought it would be, and ultimately it made me curious as to what Michael would taste like if I ever did something like that for him. His large hands began to roam over my body, lighting fires that had never fully gone out. When he began to massage my breasts the feeling was so intense my back arched, and I felt the reaction slam home all the way down to my still-spasming inner walls. I began to grind against him as best I could, wanting any part of him I could reach to ease this growing inferno between my nether lips, but Michael was being a devious bastard. The one thing I needed most, he denied me. Yes, I finally broke down. I begged and I pleaded and I made all kinds of promises

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to him. Promises that, if you asked me to repeat them, I wouldn’t be able to tell you what I’d said to save my soul. That’s how far gone I was by that time and he bloody well knew it. Michael used it to his advantage as he began to enter me, keeping me wild and frantic for his every touch, his every kiss. One of these days very soon I'm going to turn that against him. Bet me if I don't. He took hold of his cock and began to sink it into my wet entrance. Even there I tried to defy him, the tight ring of muscles putting up their own resistance in order to keep him from gaining entry. A little constant pressure, though, and he popped right in. Michael stopped, lifting me off the chair and lying me on the carpet in a swift movement that I barely registered. I was too busy being kissed like there was no tomorrow while Michael slammed his way home until he couldn’t fit another inch inside of me. I distinctly remember screaming into his mouth and feeling as if I was being torn asunder by his massive cock, but Michael was relentless. After he had settled his pelvis against mine he released my mouth, kissing the tears from my face as he whispered apologies and all the encouragement he could think of into my ears and against my tearstreaked face. I really was going to have to kill him for this one. Someday. Maybe. “I know it hurts sweetheart, but it'll pass shortly. Just hang in there," he said, gently raking my now tangled hair out of my face and eyes. I was soon to discover that Michael was as good as his word. After a few agonizing minutes had passed, the pain eventually vanished, only to be replaced with a fire that just ached to be replaced by something strange and equally demanding. My hips began to move with a restless determination, nearly bucking him off of me as I fought to get the wonderful feelings back to where they'd been. I even yanked on a good-sized hunk of his hair in my impatience, I was growing so needy. It wasn't until much later that I discovered this very pertinent fact, either. He chuckled as he began to comply, pulling his engorged cock out until all that was left inside of me was the mushroom shaped head. I whimpered, a combination of pleasure and pain lashing at my senses. My nails raked down the broad, muscular expanse of his back as he slowly plunged his length back inside, his thighs forcing my own farther apart until he settled even deeper inside of me. We both gasped when he attained that fraction

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of an inch deeper inside of my now welcoming sheath, his hips grinding against me as I tossed my head back and forth against the carpet beneath me. Then he began to thrust in and out in a regular rhythm, his hands pressing my knees to the carpet next to my shoulders. I swore at that moment I could feel the tip of his cock bumping up against the back of my throat, I could feel him so deep in side of me with each powerful thrust. Would it be like this every time we made love? Good God, I'd never survive this much pleasure if it did! Had Michael not slammed his lips down upon mine, I probably would have screamed the entire club down it felt so damned good. Wave after wave of pleasure crashed through me as he hit a certain spot deep inside of me, his balls slapping against my ass as he pounded into me harder and harder. It was getting more and more difficult to breathe since Michael was my only source of oxygen at this point. I could feel myself on the brink of passing out when he finally reached his peak, his orgasm throwing me over the edge and into one of my own – though by this time I had long since lost count of how many climaxes I'd had. Michael shuddered and rocked above me, pounding away at my body as he shot jet after hot jet of his seed deep inside my swollen sheath, the fluttering walls milking every last drop from his erupting rod with each thrust. It was actually a relief to lose the battle with consciousness then, for not even his earsplitting roar of triumph could keep me from sliding into the comforting arms of darkness that awaited me.

*

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*

*

When next I awoke I could feel a cold, wet washcloth being placed against my forehead. Another one was resting behind my neck. My eyes slowly flickered open and I blinked rapidly to accustom my eyes to the lights in the strange room I found myself in. It certainly wasn't my house, and it sure as hell wasn't the last place I could recall being in, which was the – oh, bloody hell! Where the hell was I? "Take it easy now, Amy. When you passed out, I brought you here to my home. I didn't feel comfortable just leaving you there, especially since you didn't seem to be anywhere near waking up, so – here we are. How are you feeling?" he asked.

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I focused my gaze on the gorgeous man seated next to me on the elaborate bed I had awakened upon and forced myself to hold it together as the memories flooded my mind one after the other. There was no mercy there, no gentle trickle of facts, just the immediate flood of images and emotions as I relived every licentious second of his possession of my body. What the sam hell had I done? Sure, I wanted to get rid of my virginity, but on the fucking floor of Rico and Jonathan's ladies' room for crying out loud? I groaned and rolled over on my side, groaning even louder when muscles I hadn't even known I possessed protested vigorously at the movement. By the time I could breathe again without discomfort I began swearing in three different languages. None of it was very complimentary towards Michael, and a lot of it brought into question his alleged legitimacy at birth. It was his choked off laughter that caught my attention and I halted my tirade, looking over at him reluctantly. He was actually grinning at me, the jerk-off! Michael finally got his laughter under control and stared down at me, coughing behind his hand before attempting to answer the question that was burning in my eyes. "Now, don't take it that way, Amy. I swear the only reason I'm laughing is because of the rather – imaginative curses you're throwing out. You do realize that the majority of the curses that you're heaping upon my head are physically impossible, don't you? I mean, I'm not trying to burst your bubble or anything, but…" "Fuck you!" I snapped, interrupting his speech. He was starting to irritate me anyway. I quickly found out that I should have just kept my eyes and ears open and my big mouth shut. Michael's expressive eyes went flat, his gaze pinning me where I lay. "If you insist, but I had thought to give you a bit more time to recover first." And with that he shoved my thighs wide apart and speared his way home, shoving his engorged cock balls deep inside of me. I wasn't prepared for his harsh entry, and with his cleansing of me while I had been unconscious the thrust was just as painful, if not more so, as his original entry into my body. I screamed in pain, my upper torso rearing up, my teeth latching on to his shoulder

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in order to inflict some small amount of the torture he was putting me through. Harsh curses began to stream from his lips, but not once did he try to force my mouth from their mark. I was the one to release my grip on his torn flesh, the coppery taste of his blood that was beginning to fill my mouth not something I cared to develop a taste for. Michael grasped me by my jaw as I dropped down to the pillow beneath me. He glared down at me, his voice a deadly calm growl. "Bite me again, little flower, and I will bite back." The glare I shot back at him as I spit the blood from my mouth was just as fierce, just as determined. "Hurt me like that again and I promise that I'll do worse than bite you. Ever hear of a woman named Lorena Bobbitt? Ah, the light dawns!" I said. Michael sobered slightly at my words but it didn't stop him from taking me, no matter how many times I told him no. If anything he was even more intense, fiercer with his thrusts as he took his pleasure from my body. That's not to say that I didn't get anything out of it, because I did – at least a little bit there at the end of it all. By the time he reached his orgasm I was teetering on the fine edge of pain and pleasure. You know which one I mean, right? The one that holds on to you so tight that you think it'll kill you if it doesn't stop, but if you don't keep going, you just know that you'll die, too. He pulled out after several long minutes, his chest heaving as he attempted to pull in enough air to breathe sufficiently. When he tried to kiss me I turned my head away so that it landed on my cheek instead, my eyes wide and unblinking. He'd certainly cured me of my long-time fantasy involving Native men that was for sure. His hand brushed against my cheek softly as he placed tiny kisses across my jaw and ear, slowly relaxing against me. "Amy, what's wrong? Come now, there's no reason for us to be angry with each other any longer, is there? I know you felt it just as much as I did, all the pleasure, the wonder as we came together. Talk to me, Amy!" he said, his voice rising to something quickly approaching what sounded like anxiety, but that couldn't be. He'd already taken what he wanted from me. His grip was really starting to hurt my arms and I stared down at his painful grip, waiting until he had finally released me before answering him. "First of all, you're about

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as full of shit as a Christmas turkey! You seduced me, and while I freely admit that the first time was completely consensual, this last time certainly was not, was it? I told you no, but did you listen to me? Yeah, that's what I thought." Utter silence followed and I was eventually able to work my way out of the bed. I made my way painfully into the bathroom, locking the door behind me as I stumbled into the huge shower. Turning on the water as hot as I could stand it, I grabbed the bar of soap tucked in the soap dish and began to scrub every part of my body as hard as I could. It could have been minutes or hours, I don't know how long I stood there before the water began to cool. That meant that I finally had to finish up my shower, so I reluctantly began to clean away the blood, semen and my own juices from between my trembling thighs and my aching cunt. Shutting off the water I gingerly stepped out of the shower stall, wrapping one thick towel around my hair and drying off with the other. The Egyptian cotton felt wonderful against my skin, which immediately reacted to the stimulation of the fluffy material rubbing up against my over-sensitized body. I had just wrapped the second towel around me when the door suddenly swung wide open, startling a gasp from my throat. I staggered back against the wall, my hip slamming painfully into the cool marble of the elegant countertop. "Are you alright?" he asked, walking up to me and placing one hand against my injured hip, the other brushing my throat, his thumb tracing my jaw. That slight touch sent electric shivers down my spine, a reaction I was hard put to contain. "Don't touch me," I said from between clenched teeth, and if I had to force myself to turn away from his oh-so-sensual touch and the security my body clamored for, well, so be it. No way did I want to give in and let him take over my senses again…did I? Wouldn't that just make me a weak-kneed little idiot? All I wanted was time by myself to think, far, far away from his influence and the tantalizing scent that emanated from his body, the body that was practically plastered against mine right now. Michael let loose with a frustrated sigh. He lightly rested his forehead against the top of my head and all I could do was stand there, pinned against the wall as he brought his hands up to caress my cheeks.

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"I – this is not how I envisioned our night together," he murmured, and I could hear confusion lacing his voice. I decided not to fight when he very gently swept me up in his arms and carried me back to his bed, although I had shut my eyes so tight my eyelids were trembling. When he settled me into the plush bed, the scent of fresh linens hit me and I risked opening my eyes. Sure enough, he'd changed the sheets while I'd been in the shower. "I'm going to go hop in the shower. Just stay here while I get cleaned up, okay? We need to talk." Moments later he turned and walked into the bathroom, his sexy backside flexing beneath that long flow of hair that I was helpless to pull my eyes away from. With a tiny groan I finally turned my face away but not before he saw me and noticed what part of his anatomy had so enthralled me. He tossed me a wink and a sexy little grin before tossing his head and disappearing from sight. Damn him to hell and back anyway. I swear I'm never going to touch another onion again in my entire life – edible or otherwise! Once I heard the water turn on I forced my aching body out of bed again and squirmed into my leathers. It wasn't as easy this time around since I was still slightly damp from my shower, but I managed to finally wriggle my way into them before Michael had finished. I deliberately left off my boots until I had managed to reach the front door. No sense in alerting him unless I absolutely had to, right? Throwing open the door I ran down the front walk and into the street in an attempt to get my bearings. Hell, I had no clue as to where the fuck I was! I closed my eyes for a few precious seconds and took a calming breath, easing back to the curb. There was no sense in getting hit by a car while I determined which way I was going to go. Leaving it up to fate, I did a little twirl and held out my arm, my finger pointing out in a straight line. When I came to a stop it led me towards the intersection to the left of Michael's house, so I took off at a dead run, or at least as fast as a run as I could tolerate with the amount of protesting my muscles would allow. I guess you really don't know how many you have until you start using them for the first time, huh? A block and a half away I heard my name shouted and risked a look over my shoulder. Sure enough, it was Michael, and he was running flat out towards me, trying to

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coax me back. Ignoring the pain, I forced my body to even greater speed, my eyes widening as I spotted my salvation – a taxi coming to a stop at the flashing red stop light not twenty feet away from me. Thanking my father for teaching me such an unladylike trick I pursed my lips and curled my tongue, letting out an ear-piercing whistle. The taxi driver caught sight of me and raised her hand, waiting for me. I damn near slammed into the side of the cab, my trembling fingers fumbling momentarily with the handle before I finally managed to fling it open and quite literally throw myself inside. "Go, go, go, go, go!" I shouted at the driver as I collapsed across the seat, gasping for breath and trembling like a leaf being tossed about capriciously by an uncaring current of air. Thankfully she complied, and I was graced with the sound of squealing tires as she peeled out in an effort to get us both out of there. Was I relieved? Damn straight I was! So why was there this traitorous little part of me that turned around and peeked out the wide rear windshield to stare back at Michael as he stood in the middle of the intersection calling my name?

May 22, 2005 3:01 a.m.

Yeah, yeah, I know. Bite me, already. You want a confessional, go to a Catholic Church and do the whole "Forgive me Father, for I have sinned" bullshit yourself, okay? I had run away like the scared rabbit I was last week and I freely admit it. It wasn't like Rico and Jonathan would let me get away with it for long, though. They came along tonight and ruined a perfectly good pity party, thank you very much. I had been sitting in my living room watching some stupid movie earlier tonight in my favorite sweats when the doorbell rang, followed by relentless knocking on my door.

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The sun was still shining, that much I do remember, and the irritating sound of off-key singing had accompanied the doorbell, announcing to all and sundry that the two love birds had arrived to pester the shit out of me. Wee-fuckin-haw. Knowing that they wouldn't leave me alone unless I answered the door, I groaned and tossed aside the quilt I had been snuggled in for the better part of a week now and stormed over to the door, flinging it open and glaring at them both. "Good God, you look like something the cat hacked up, baby girl! What the hell is wrong with you anyway?" Rico half shouted as he practically shoved me aside and began to take stock of the condition of my house. By that point I simply groaned in defeat and flung an arm out, gesturing haphazardly to allow Jonathan in. He smiled sympathetically down at me and gently took me into his arms, and that's when I finally lost it. All of the swirling emotions I had been holding inside for the week of isolation I had enforced upon myself burst free, and I cried my heart out in the arms of one of my dearest friends. I didn't even realize that he'd picked me up and carried me back to the oversized sofa that took up most of the far wall, seating himself and pulling the quilt over me in an effort to stop the hard shudders that wracked my body. He just let me cry myself out, his huge, rough hand stroking my hair and my back so gently that I felt safe enough to finally fall asleep, a state I had not been acquainted with for several days now. How long I slept there in Jonathan's arms I don't know, but it was full dark by the time I opened my eyes again. The most tempting aromas filled the house, along with the citrus scent that let me know Rico had gone off on yet another cleaning tangent. He tended to do that when he got really upset, and the fact that his seeing me like this had set him off made me feel guilty and embarrassed. I pulled away from Jonathan's chest, swearing pithily under my breath as I noticed the huge wet stain where my head had been. My face must've turned twenty-seven different shades of red and I tried to hide from his eagle-sharp gaze, but naturally he wouldn't have anything to do with it, damn his contrary hide. "Just where do you think you're going, young lady?" he said, handing me several Puffs facial tissues. I took advantage of them and blew my nose, trying in vain to use the extras to mop up the mess I had made of his Harley t-shirt. All I got for my efforts was a

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bellow of laughter. "Babe, you know better than that! You ain't the first person to cry on me, and God knows you won't be the last. What's a little snot between friends, huh?" With logic like that, who was I to argue with him? I just looked up at him and gave him a watery smile, a few unexpected tears sliding from the corners of my eyes. "Oh, hell no," he shouted, suspicious moisture gathering in his own ice blue eyes as he stared into mine. "Damn it, you just woke up. Don't you dare start up with the water works again!" The suspicious tremble of his neatly trimmed goatee touched my heart and I let loose with a tremulous chuckle, throwing my arms around his thickly muscled neck. I held on to him as tight as I could, grateful that he was so careful with me in return. "Thank you, Jonathan, for everything," I whispered. "I honestly don't know what I'd do without the two of you sometimes." Rico walked out of the kitchen a few minutes later carrying a tray filled to bursting with homemade cheese enchiladas, refried beans, Spanish rice and three glasses of icecold milk. For the next half hour we sat there happily munching away at the spicy fare, and I gave both of them grateful glances that the Inquisition had yet to start. Oh, I knew it would begin as soon as dinner was over with, but at least I would have this delicious respite from it. The two men took the dishes to the kitchen after we were all wonderfully sated, cleaning up after themselves and putting the leftovers in containers in the fridge for me. In the meantime, I used the facilities and freshened up a bit, taking a quick shower and changing out of my sweats and in to a comfortable pair of black jeans and a purple beaded halter top. The love bites on both sides of my throat were almost gone now, but they could still be seen when my hair was pulled back or stuffed in a towel – like it was right now. There was also the faint bruise covering my left hip that I had received from slamming up against Michael's huge marble countertop in his bathroom, hence the reason for my outfit. Yes, I wanted them to see my bruises, but I also wanted them to know that it wasn't entirely his fault. I fully intended to take responsibility for my own actions, but I couldn't keep hiding

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from what had happened, either. I had placed myself in the situation, and it wasn't as if he had raped me. I had wanted it just as much as he had, and at the end of the second bout I had almost – almost been there. If only he'd taken a little while longer…done just a little more. But enough wishful thinking. I could feel Rico and Jonathan's heated stares as their tempers began to flare out of control once they spotted my bruises as I made my way towards them. I have to admit that I've never seen Rico in such an angry state before, and by the look on his face and the ranting and raving he was doing, in two different languages no less, he would've scared anyone shitless. "Whoa there, fellas. Before you go and get on your high horses and ride off in defense of my virtue, we need to talk. Now," I said as firmly as I could while trying to block the front door at the same time. It took me a good fifteen minutes to talk them into sitting down in the living room again, but eventually they listened to me – or at least they were humoring me for the moment. Either way, they were still here and that was all that mattered right now. My hands, hell, my entire body was shaking to some extent while I sat there and bared my soul to them, telling how I had lost my virginity on the brand new carpeting on the floor of the new ladies' salon in their club just last week. I blushed, I stuttered and I shed even more tears, but I forced myself to continue until every last detail – with the exception of his name – was revealed. There was no way I would let them leave my home with that kind of knowledge and vengeance in their hearts. "So help me, I'm gonna find that prick and fuckin…" Jonathan growled, his fists clenching so tight that his knuckles popped one right after the other, not unlike rapid gunfire. What surprised me the most was that Rico was right there beside him, his face and body set so rigidly that I thought he would literally shatter he was so intense. Damn, if the two of them weren't gay I'd be tempted to fall in love with them myself! "No!" I half-shouted, placing a hand on each of their faces, faces that were oh-so dear to me. How the hell was I supposed to handle this now? They were ready to go Rambo on his ass and they didn't even know who he was yet! "Jonathan, Rico, please. I don't want either one of you to hunt him down, and," I

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stopped briefly, staring pointedly into Jonathan's eyes as I did so, "And I don't want you to send any of your buddies from the road or the shop after him, either. Promise me, or so help me, you can find yourselves another Bitch of Honor for the wedding. I swear it!" It took me another half an hour or so of negotiations with the two stubborn, overprotective men in my life before they reluctantly agreed to leave him alone and not to send any of their acquaintances after his sorry ass, but at least now I had one less thing to worry about. Why the hell I was worrying so much about Michael I didn't know, nor did I completely understand at that point. Gee, glutton for punishment much? The discussion finally over with, I found myself reluctantly talked into going back to the bar with them. Even though I was scared shitless that I'd run into Michael again, I'd be damned if I'd run and hide either. Going into the bedroom real fast I pulled on my boots and applied a touch of make-up to hide the dark circles under my eyes. As we headed towards the door I grabbed my keys and we were off. The bar was pretty much hopping by the time we arrived, the night crew well in control of the club. Jonathan had chosen very well when he hired his crew and, unbeknownst to me, he'd had Rico call in earlier to let everyone know to open the club without them. A stuck-up group of teenagers were trying to bribe Thorne, the beefed up six-footeight inch tall bouncer that claimed Norse ancestry, into letting them get inside with their fake driver's licenses as we reached the entrance and he let loose with his trademark laugh. It was enough to send chills down your spine if you weren't used to the man and his deceptive ways. Deep and thunderous, it echoed along the street as he threw his head back and literally roared with laughter. It was when he stopped that the teens knew they were in trouble. His sapphire blue eyes tore into each and every one of them with the intensity of laser beams. It was all I could do not to burst out laughing at them as they huddled into a tiny group, trying to make themselves as small a target as they could. It was fucking hysterical, I swear! "Have you nothing better to do with your time than to try to enter this establishment with identification that is so obviously false? I suggest you turn round and head for your homes afore I forget myself and take my temper out on your pathetic hides. Begone!"

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The five teenagers turned on their heels and ran as fast as they could away from the club as his voice literally boomed out, nearly deafening everyone within earshot. They were chased along by the laughter of the long line of people waiting for admission to the nightclub, but even that didn't last long. All it took was one stony glare from Thorne to silence the rowdy crowd once more. "Rico, Jonathan, Milady. I bid you welcome," Thorne said as he moved the velvet rope aside and opened the door for us. He always made me blush when I came to the club, and tonight wasn't any different. Thorne looked at me up and down at his leisure, his heated glance covering every inch of my body, letting me know that he would thoroughly enjoy the task of physically tearing off my clothes, too, the lech. God knew he'd already stripped me as naked as the day I was born with his eyes more times than I could count. A warm tug at my hand pulled me to a gentle stop and I looked back, surprised to find that Thorne had me in his grip. My eyes widened and I stared up at him, a hundred questions slamming through my mind. In a courtly gesture that I found rather charming at the time, he raised my hand to his cool lips, turning it at the last possible second and placing his open mouth against my fluttering pulse. It's a little fuzzy, what happened after Thorne's cool lips touched my wrist in what I assumed was an innocent kiss. All I remember is opening my eyes and feeling light headed and that my mouth was suddenly as dry as the desert. How had I ever thought those slender, sensual lips cold? They were burning hot as he placed yet another scorching kiss against my wrist, his wicked tongue lapping quickly across the throbbing veins before he loosened his grip somewhat. I shook my head to clear the sudden attack of cobwebs that had filled my mind, my tongue slipping out from between my parched lips in an attempt to moisten the dryness that had settled there. Thorne's fingers reached up and gently smoothed away my frown and I found myself pressing my cheek against his now heated palm. "Ah, little one, your innocence was wasted on that one. I would have shown you how a Viking truly claims his mate," Thorne said, his deep, accented voice barely above a whisper. I shook my head sharply, pulling myself out of some kind of sensual spell that I had fallen into and stared up into his face. For the first time in the two years he had been

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working here, I felt a shimmer of fear. Thorne had well and truly frightened me. I tried to pull my hand free from his grasp but he wouldn't allow it. My heart began to pick up speed as I became more and more alarmed. "Damn it, Thorne, let me go. If you don't, I'm going to cause a scene, and you know I will," I said, wrapping my free hand around my wrist and using it to pull. Finally he released me, using his fingers to force my head up until our gazes met. I had received the message loud and clear, alright. The look in his deep sapphire blue eyes only reinforced it. If he hadn't wanted to release me, I would never have gotten free. "Our time will come, little one. Of that I have no doubt," he said. The confidence in his voice was chilling in its intensity and I took an involuntary step backwards, shaking my head no at the same time. "The only time that'll come between us will be the end of our friendship, Thorne, and I would really hate to see that happen. I don't feel that way about you. I never have, and I never will. If you force this on me we'll both lose, and I'd much rather have you as my friend than my enemy." It was several nerve-wracking moments before he looked away from my face and sighed. "I know not how you managed it, but you have me wrapped round your dainty little finger, milady. Friends we shall be then, but you cannot blame a man for trying," Thorne said, a wry grin tilting his sexy-as-sin lips. Needless to say I left while the leaving was good.

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Several hours later I had cheered up somewhat, the eerie experience with Thorne at the door nearly forgotten after a few stronger than usual drinks. Damn skippy I was a little bit tipsy, but I figured I was entitled after the week I'd just been through. Then the bottom fell out of my night. Michael Black Wolf walked through the door looking sexier than any person had a right to – and he wasn't alone, either. The petite woman he had with him was just as

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gorgeous as he was and also of Native ancestry, though she wore her slightly longer hair in a single heavy braid down her back. My heart chose that moment to rebel, halting for several seconds before doubling its pace with a heavy thud. He'd replaced me so soon? Well, fuck him and the horse he'd rode in on, I thought, and if my heart was a bit achy, too fucking bad. It was at that moment that he looked over and our eyes met. The floor damn near fell out from beneath my feet as I lost myself in his obsidian gaze all over again. He began to stalk towards me and my breath caught in my throat. Blessedly, a huge form placed itself in front of me and I gasped for breath, my eyes blinking rapidly as I made the long trek upwards to meet Thorne's gaze. "What – what is it, Thorne?" I asked, still not quite recovered from seeing Michael walking towards me so determinedly. Thorne was staring down at me so strangely, his body so tense that I tensed myself. "Who is this man to you, little one?" he asked, pressing even closer to me as Michael and his date drew along side of us. I freely admit that at this point I panicked. I didn't want the confrontation I knew was coming with Michael, so I totally waffled and threw my arms around Thorne, pulling his head down until I could whisper into his ear, "Please, just play along with me, okay?" What else could Thorne do but obey? I knew he wanted more than a friendship with me and I was using him shamelessly to throw my lover from last week off the scent, as it were. His strong arms wrapped around me and his lips found mine, his tongue thrusting in and out of my mouth in a rhythm that wasn't unpleasant at all. It just didn't stir me the way Michael's kiss had. I think Thorne knew it shortly after the kiss began, but he was determined, if nothing else. He kept on kissing me and caressing me for the longest time. I even responded to some degree, my breasts swelling, my nipples hardening as I wrapped my arms around him and held him close. It just wasn't the same. Neither one of us pulled away from the kiss until a strong hand practically ripped us apart. Then the shit really hit the fan. "Amy, do you want to tell me just what the fuck is going on here?" Michael said

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from between clenched teeth. I could tell he was beyond pissed, but I didn't know how to handle him. I was terrified, completely unsure of myself in a situation like this. Hadn't he been the one to show up with another woman? Why the fuck was he so pissed off with me! I was the injured party, not him! "I would say that is obvious. My woman and I are enjoying ourselves, little man. Get you gone before I decide to toss you out on your arse," Thorne grumbled, taking my mouth with yet another one of his devastating kisses that I so wished I could react to with more enthusiasm. Thorne was ripped off of me and I stared at the two men in awe and not a little fear. Both men were royally pissed and this wasn't about to be settled nicely. The petite woman that had accompanied Michael was trying, with about as much luck as I was having with Thorne, to pull him off and away from the situation, all to no avail. One hell of a fight was upcoming and I was the cause of it, all because of my prior innocence and insecurities, damn it. "Michael, Thorne, please, don't do this," I half-shouted as the two men stormed their way to the relative privacy of the roof. Why Thorne was leading him there rather than to the parking lot as he would any other drunk or problem customer I didn't know, but I was terrified to find out. A hand gripped mine, keeping me from following the three of them up the private stairwell right away and I turned around to face Jon and Rico. I flushed uncomfortably, lowering my head at their steady stares as the inevitable question came. "Is that him?" Jonathan asked, his voice as hard as stone. "You promised me you'd leave this alone. Both of you did," I reminded them as tears slid from my eyes. I just had to get upstairs before two men that I dearly loved tore each other apart, which meant I didn't have time to stand here and reassure two other men that I loved more than life itself. I caressed each of their cheeks briefly, praying they would understand as I turned and ran away. I took the stairs two at a time but I wasn't prepared for what I'd find when I got to the roof. Nothing could've prepared me for that, no matter what I'd been expecting. Thorne had Michael by the throat with one hand and was holding him over the edge of

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the four-story building, preparing to let him go. The woman that had entered the club with Michael was screaming and crying, tugging at Thorne's arm, promising him anything he wanted if only he would release her brother. Her brother! Oh, God, what had I done? "Thorne, no!" I screamed, running across the roof as if my life depended on it. Actually, it did, because the thought of Thorne opening his hand and allowing Michael to fall four stories to his death would kill me. I knew it as well as I knew the sun would rise in the morning. Just then Thorne turned his head to look at me and I slid to a dead stop. My eyes widened in absolute horror, my head shaking back and forth in denial as I began to step backwards away from him. An agonized look entered his eyes and he shuddered, his head falling back as he released a long, ululating cry into the night sky. My back hit the wall next to the door and I pressed my hands against my ears to protect my eardrums against the piercing noise. The next thing I knew Michael was lying in a heap at my feet, a cool hand touching my cheek, a deep, aching voice whispering huskily against my ear, "Remember me, little one." By the time I could raise my hand to touch my cheek he was gone. There was only the three of us on the roof, with Michael's sister kneeling close to the edge of the roof and rocking in place as she attempted to pull herself together again. I dropped to my knees myself, smoothing the hair from Michael's face and smothering him with kisses as I made sure he was truly alright. I thought he was choking or something and was preparing to do mouth-to-mouth resuscitation on him when the smug bastard finally fucked up and slipped, proving to me that he was laughing, not dying. Here I was, thinking he was about to become a corpse, and he was lying there laughing at me! My eyes narrowed, anger flaring in them as I let my knee slip dangerously close to his pride and joy, the family jewels as they were. "Alright, alright, I'm sorry! No need to bruise the boys before we get to enjoy our reunion is there?" he said, truly trying to hold off his amusement. Maybe it was just me, but I didn't see the humor in it. Then again, it had been my fault in the first place. All of a sudden I burst out crying, something I hadn't done since earlier that evening, and even then I hadn't done much of that before in my life, damn it. What the

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hell was it about being with, around or even thinking about this man that reduced me to fucking tears, anyway? If he didn't watch out, I was gonna kill him for real, just to keep from having a fit of crying all the time. I felt his strong, warm arms wrap around me and heard him crooning against my hair as he rocked me against his body. A smaller hand touched my shoulder and I looked up, faintly recognizing his sister as she knelt next to us and was pulled into the extended embrace. How long we knelt there like that I don't know, but there wasn't a dry eye to be found when we were through. Even Michael had tearstains on his face. "Michael, I'm so sorry about…" I said. "Amy, I'm so sorry about…" he said at the same time, and we both chuckled wetly, insisting the other go first. Finally he convinced me to go, though I looked forward to it about as much as I did an audit with the Infernal Revenue Service. "Michael, I – I've never…Shit, I don't know how to say this right! I've never been in a real relationship before and there you were, all huge and up in my face. I didn't know how to handle you. You scared the shit out of me, and yet all I can think about is being with you. Then I saw you come in tonight with her, and – and all I could think of was hurting you as much as I was hurting. When Thorne suddenly appeared in front of me, I just…reacted I guess. I told him to play along, and boy, did he surprise me! But Michael, I didn't feel with him the way I feel when you kiss me. Sure, it felt nice and all, but there weren't any fireworks. I didn't lose my mind when he kissed me. Or – or my heart," I finished, my voice sliding off into a whisper. I could hear Michael's breathing as I waited for him to speak and I was beginning to lose hope. It was steady as an engine while mine was ragged and choked. I was fighting off the tears that seemed to be my steady companion since I'd met him. Again. Damn it, what was going on in his freakin’ mind already? Was he going to make me suffer for the rest of my life or was he going to get on with it? I didn't have the rest of my life here, you know! If he was going to destroy me, I'd rather he got it over with so I could finish falling apart in private. He was holding my good hand in his, damn near crushing it in his grip, not that I intended to throw a bitch

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kitty about it or anything. Hell, it wasn't that big a deal at the moment as far as I was concerned. My wrist was causing me more discomfort than that, though where the hell the huge freakin bruise on the inside of my wrist had come from I had no idea. It almost looked like the hickies Michael had left on my neck, but who the heck would have… "Amy, Amy, whatever am I going to do with you? I didn't think it was possible, but here you are, surprising me yet again. Last week you gave me the greatest gift a woman can give to her man. You gave me the gift of your innocence. Do you honestly think I'm going to let you get away from me now? You're mine, woman, and I'd fight heaven and hell to keep you for myself. I think tonight I actually did fight it, so what else do I have to do to convince you that I intend to keep you next to me for the rest of our lives?" My shocked cry stalled him for barely a moment, his lips taking mine in a sweet, languorous kiss before continuing. "I haven't been able to get you out of my mind since the night we met, you stubborn, beautiful woman. You had me from the beginning, and you'll have me until the end, because I fully intend to follow you throughout eternity, little love. Think you can put up with me for that long?" he asked, staring straight into my eyes as I covered my mouth with my hand. "Try and stop me," I said in the split second before he covered my mouth with his, stealing my breath, my heart, and my soul forever more.

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So, dear readers, as you can tell, my journey was a huge success. I managed in the span of a week to find my soulmate. How long it takes me to drag him to the altar is another story. We still have to deal with the aftermath of his fight with Thorne because there's still that wee bit of a problem concerning Michael's sister, Crystal. She made certain promises to Thorne before he disappeared from the face of the earth, and I have a feeling that he's going to be coming back to collect on those promises – sooner than any of us expect. Until later.

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All In A Day’s Work By Rene Walden

April 26th

Hi. My name is Rene. I know you don’t know me very well, but I’ve got to share my adventures in housekeeping with you. Yeah, I know. I’m sure you’re all saying, ‘adventures in housekeeping’? What the fuck? Believe me, I totally understand that reaction. I would be the same way if someone told the story to me. That was pretty much my reaction when I took the job. You know, “Oh great, I get to be a housekeeper for the next two years!” Yippee – NOT! Boy, was I ever wrong. I had no idea when I started this job that things would turn out like they did. Well, wait. Let me back up a little and tell you how all this started. Sometimes I jump ahead and get the cart before the horse. I’d been trying to make it on my own for several years, and needless to say, struggling at best to make ends meet. I knew I had to do something so I could get a better job. I made up my mind and decided to go back to college. I had been out of high school for about seven years, so I wasn’t your typical fulltime college student. I soon found out that there were actually a lot of folks in the same situation as myself. We were known as ‘non-traditional students’.

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Like most of the other folks my age that I’d met, we also had to work a job while going to school full time to keep things going financially. The university had advertised several jobs before the semester started, but I had missed most of them and the ones that were left weren’t right for me. Either the hours were wrong to go along with my schedule, or it was a job I would hate doing every day. The jobs I found where I was qualified to do the work wouldn’t work around my class schedule. I was really starting to get desperate after the first few weeks of classes with no job prospects at all in sight. I knew if I didn’t find something soon I’d have to scrap the whole college idea and just go back to working full-time. A girl’s gotta eat, ya know. Feeling pretty discouraged about all my big plans for the future, I decided to walk down to the corner for a paper. Joe’s Diner was just down the block from my apartment, so I figured what the hell. I could have pie and coffee while I searched the classifieds. Joe’s was a busy little place. Usually full of hungry customers, but since it was late afternoon, it was the ‘in between’ time. Perfect for my hideaway time – too late for lunch, too early for supper, but nice and quiet for a delicious piece of pie and some of Joe’s coffee. I came here everyday, so I guess you could say I was a regular. The atmosphere was nice, and Joe, the owner of the place, was really sweet. I was crazy about him and his wife, Maggie, and we talked a lot when things were slow at the diner. I paid for my newspaper and walked inside. The bell jingled as I opened the door. The place was quiet, just like I knew it would be. Joe looked up from the counter and smiled. “Hey René. How’s school going?”

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“Hey Joe. Goin’ pretty good. I’m startin’ to get the hang of it finally.” “That’s great, hon. I knew ya could do it.” Joe smiled his father smile at me. I guess that’s part of the reason I’m so fond of him. He just has this fatherly look about him. You know the look—white hair, bald on the top, chubby belly, and a round face with blue eyes that sparkle when he laughs. Joe and his wife, Maggie, sort of took me under their wing when I moved into my apartment a few years ago. I walked over to the counter and ordered a piece of apple pie with ice cream, of course, and a cup of coffee, then turned back to Joe while I waited for my order. “How’s Maggie enjoyin’ the visit with her sister?” “Oh, she’s havin’ a ball. You know how Maggie is. That woman loves to talk, and Laverne is the same way.” I laughed along with him. We both knew that it was the truth. “Well, I’ve got some stock to take care of. You enjoy your pie and coffee.” “See ya, Joe.” I took my things and headed for my favorite booth. I love to sit and look out the window. It makes me feel like I’m peeking in on the world. I had just opened to the classified section when I heard the door jingle again. I turned to see if it was one of the other regulars who sometimes joined me in the afternoons, but this was someone new. I had never seen this handsome man. He walked inside and then directly to the counter, his voice low as he talked to the waitress. I tried to act all nonchalant, but I peered at the man over my paper. He looked really good for what I considered an older man. Generally I was only interested in guys close to my own age,

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but this man was—well, yummy. The man looked to be about early to mid-forties, with thick, dreamy salt and pepper hair. I could almost imagine how it would feel to run my fingers through it. He had a nice, firm ass that was very evident in the jeans he wore—not too tight, but not too baggy. I love a man in Levi’s. They do it to me every time. I could imagine my fingers roaming over his muscled back and tight ass. I wonder what he smells like? I’m sure a guy like that wears good smelling cologne, probably a nice masculine scent, not too strong or overbearing. I could nuzzle up against his neck, inhaling his scent as I reached between his legs and…Whoops, time to snap out of the fantasy and get back to the story. I peeked back over the paper in time to see him flash a flirty smile with Jaymi, the waitress. She giggled like a silly schoolgirl and walked into the back. I’ve often wondered if women like that realized how goofy they look batting their eyelashes and giggling at a man—definitely not an attractive sight. Oh well, that’s just my opinion, cause Mr. Dreamy laughed and flashed that smile at her again. I decided right then and there, if that’s the type he liked, no need in me daydreaming, because I’m not the giggly type. I settled back into the booth and went back to my classified. Maybe today would be my lucky day and I’d actually find something in the paper instead of wasting my time and money. I skimmed through the listings: truck driver’s wanted…well that one leaves me out; secretarial position…qualified for that one, but it’s during the day. The more I looked the more disgusted I got. It was useless; I’d just have to forget it. It didn’t take long to get all the way through the ads, so I lay the paper aside and picked up my fork. The ice cream had melted and pooled at the bottom of the saucer, just the way I liked it. The fork wasn’t going to work, at least not without making a mess, so I

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reached across the table for my coffee spoon. Grace has never been my strong suit, and of course, just as I grabbed for the spoon it slipped from my hand and clattered to the floor. I felt the heat rise in my face as Mr. Dreamy turned around and picked up my spoon. “Here, let me get you another one.” I mumbled to myself as I slid out of the booth and turned to him and smiled. “That’s alright, I can get it. Thanks anyway, though.” He turned back to the counter and I grabbed the spoon from Jaymi and went back to my seat. My God, am I a total idiot or what? Just as I began to drown my misery in pie and melted ice cream, I heard Joe’s voice boom through the diner. “Josh! What in the world are you doing here?” Hmmm, now Mr. Dreamy had a name, and obviously Joe knew him. Needless to say, I was curious. “Hey, Joe,” Josh said, reaching out to shake Joe’s hand. It was one of those ‘I know ya really well’ handshakes. Joe was smiling and apparently very happy to see Josh, whoever he was. I sat there in my booth pretending not to notice, but inwardly straining to see if I could hear anything. Their voices lowered after Josh started talking to him and Joe’s face took on a more serious look. I noticed both of em turn to look at me and I quickly lowered my head, developing a deep interest in my pie. I could see them out of the corner of my eye making their way over to my booth. My God, what was I gonna do if Joe was tryin’ to fix me up? I’d kill him. I jumped when Joe spoke to me, even though I knew he was headed in my direction. “René, there’s somebody I’d like you to meet.”

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“Oh, hey, Joe.” I set my cup down with a thud, quickly moving my hands to my lap to keep them from seeing them shake. I looked straight at Josh, but I could feel the heat creep into my face. I just knew I looked like a blubbering idiot. “Hi there, nice to meet ya.” “Nice to meet you, too.” Josh had one of those smooth, sexy voices that sent chills through you when he spoke. “You a friend of Joe and Maggie’s?” I shifted uncomfortably in the booth. My skin felt suddenly sweaty and my legs were sticking to the seat. Joe spoke up, “Yeah he is, René. Josh and his wife Beverly are needing a housekeeper, and I knew you were needing a job, so I thought I could get the two of you together.” I nearly fell out of my seat. Josh was married and here I sat thinking Joe was trying to fix me up with him, like for a date—not a job. “Oh, well sure, have a seat.” The voice in my ears didn’t even sound like my own. This man did strange things to me. I wasn’t sure how well it would go over for me to work for him. Josh smiled and sat down across from me. Joe said his goodbyes and hurried off to the backroom to finish with his stock. My mind buzzed as I stared at Josh, only half paying attention to the conversation. I was right; damn, he did smell good—really good. He had paused. I really needed to pay attention to what he was saying. “Uh…what were you saying?” I smiled at him again. Damn, I felt like an idiot. “I was just explaining that my wife travels a lot with business and I work from my home office, so we’d like someone to be available for general housekeeping and various other tasks needed to run a home. Joe tells me you need something that will work around

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your class schedule.” “Oh, yes. I have classes on Tuesday and Thursday until two, but I’d be available after that and the rest of the week. Even on Saturday, if you needed me.” “That sounds great. I’m taking care of this matter myself as a sort of surprise for my wife.” He smiled at me again and sent chills through me. His wife was one lucky lady, such a good-looking husband and considerate too. “Well, that sure is sweet of you.” Secretly I felt a stab of jealousy, or maybe it was more like envy. Why were all the good ones already snagged up? I could hear him talking to me, but the words seemed garbled. Why was I having so much trouble paying attention to what he was saying? It’s not like I’m a ditz or anything; usually I’m pretty focused, but his smell, his eyes, the way his lips looked so plump and inviting—everything about this guy was pushing all the right buttons. He moved in closer and touched my arm. “So what do you think?” He caught me off guard again and I smiled. “I think it sounds great.” I had very little idea of what I’d just agreed to. All I knew was I wanted to get to know more about Josh. “Fantastic, I think you’re just what we’ve been looking for. I’m really glad Joe recommended you.” He wrote down their address and handed it to me before standing up. I somehow managed to grab my things and join him, pretending I was ready to leave. Josh took my hand into his and patted the top of it softly, giving it a firm squeeze. I saw something in his eyes, but what? I scolded myself for being silly. He was just being nice. After all, I was a new employee. Still, it seemed to be a little more than that. “Thank you for the job. I’m looking forward to working for you.”

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“It’ll be my pleasure.” Before I knew what he was doing, he pulled out his wallet and walked back over to Jaymi. “I’ve got her pie and coffee too.” Oh, Mr. Seran, I can take care of that myself.” “It’s Josh, and don’t argue. I’ve got it.” I argued for a few seconds, but by then he had it paid for and replaced his wallet. “Well, thank you, Josh.” I stood there grinning like an idiot. What was wrong with me? He took my hand again giving it a firm squeeze. “I’ll see you first thing in the morning, René.” I heard the jingle of the door as I called out, “See you in the morning.”

July 17th

Well, it’s been three months now since I started working for Josh and his wife, Beverly. Let me tell you, I know why they have problems finding people to stick with them. I had been a bit suspicious when Josh had told me how much they paid, because it was so much more than any other jobs of that nature paid. I just thought maybe for once

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I’d been lucky and stumbled onto a good thing. Boy was I wrong! Josh had turned out to be exactly what I had expected. He was very sweet and kind, never once treating me any different than he had that first day at the restaurant. Beverly, his wife, was a different story. To put it bluntly, she’s an out and out bitch! She acts like she’s too good to even be in the same room with me. Always walking around like she’s Ms. High and Mighty. It just makes me sick. I know, you’re prolly thinking it’s just me, but I’ve become friends with another lady who cooks for them, and she agrees with me. Rosie has been with them for the past four years, and she says Mrs. Seran has been that way ever since she started. At least she doesn’t make a difference in her employees; she treats everyone badly. To be honest, she’s not much better with Josh either. Everyday it’s the same thing. She walks around with this condescending look on her face all the time. When she has absolutely no other choice, she’ll speak directly to you, but she doesn’t even have the common courtesy to look ya in the eye. She has this way of simply dismissing you with a wave of her hand. Not only does she do this with the employees, she dismisses Josh in the same way. I know why I put up with her ‘better than thou’ crap – it’s all about the money for me. I make really good money and it gives me the means to continue with my classes, but I’m not sure about the others. In the time that I’ve worked here, I’ve not talked to even one other person who DOES like her. I sure don’t see why Josh puts up with her and the way she acts. He’s a great guy – super sweet, makes good money, and is extremely hot for a man his age. Let me tell you about something that happened just the other day and you’ll see

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what I mean about how badly she treats him. I was dusting in the living room and saw Josh come through the back door. He was in a really good mood, and it showed. He was whistling and had this sexy half grin on his face. I love it when he looks like that. Oh, the things I could do to that man…well never mind my thoughts, back to what I was telling you. Anyhow, Josh is very playful and outgoing. He’s forever joking around with Rosie or Bud. Well he must have been feelin a little frisky too, because he came up behind Beverly at wrapped his arms around her. I watched them for a while through the doorway. For some reason, I couldn’t turn away. As he moved closer to her, he nuzzled against her neck. I could just imagine the soft words he was whispering to her. That familiar throb started between my legs, as my pussy ached for him. I wanted to be in her shoes, feeling his body pressed against my ass. He slid his hands up her sides and gently cupped her breasts through her dress, while he kissed the back of her neck. How in the world she managed it, I’ll never know, but she just stood there like some kind of damned statue. You wanna tell me how in the world you could keep from responding if a hot man like that was pressed against your ass? She never moved, never even really acknowledged what he was doing. His hands glided across the fabric back down to her thighs, pulling her closer to him. My panties were growing more and more wet as I watched this intimate show in the next room. It was so obvious that he wanted her. He arched against her ass, kissing the back of her neck again. Then suddenly he stopped, and his expression changed. I could tell she’d said something to him, but I couldn’t hear anything. I know I probably should have turned away or went to another room, but I

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couldn’t. My feet felt like lead and I simply couldn’t move. Josh had stepped back from her and his face was red now, his body rigid. I could tell he was angry. His voice boomed from the room, “Fine, I won't touch you!” Beverly wheeled around in his face, looking disgusted. Her voice was also raised to a heated pitch. “I’ve already told you, I don’t want you touching me that way!” Josh strode to the doorway, turning back once more. “You don’t have to worry about me touching you again.” He continued to the door and our eyes locked. I felt the heat of embarrassment creep into my face. I’d been caught eavesdropping, which I suppose you couldn’t really call it that because they were being loud. But still, I felt he knew I had watched the whole scene. I feel so bad for him cause the scene I just described is pretty much the norm around here. I doubt very seriously if they have anything goin on in the bedroom. From the looks of things around here, they prolly haven’t in a long time. I know, I know. You’re probably wondering what’s up with my fascination with Josh. As silly as this sounds, a girl knows when a man is attracted to her, and this man is definitely interested! I catch myself flirting some when we talk, and he flirts right back. Now don’t get me wrong, it’s nothing openly vulgar or anything like that, but he flirts. Of course, being the kind of man he is, he’s never made a pass at me, or even acted in any way out of bounds, but it’s sure not like I’d get mad if he did. I know that’s bad of me to say, with him being married and all, not to mention the fact that he’s my boss, but Damn! He’s such a honey! . I dunno, maybe it’s wrong of me, but it sure doesn’t feel that way, so I don’t see

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things changing anytime soon.

November 15th Well things are definitely starting to heat up at my job. I know, you’re prolly asking yourself, what is this woman up to now? Well I tell ya, it’s just sorta one of those, ‘in the right place at the wrong time’ kinda things. Josh and I have been spending a lot of time together. And no, it’s not what you’re thinking. It just works out that way. I’m here all day four days a week, and well, he works from home. Beverly is always gone somewhere, so that leaves a whole lot of time where it’s just me and Josh in the house. We’ve just been talking and really getting to be good friends. He confides in me. Lemme back up a little bit, I always tend to get ahead of myself. About two months ago, not long after they had the big ‘blow up’ scene, Beverly suddenly took a major interest in the Hopes and Dreams Foundation, and started spending a lot of time away from home. Now I know it’s a charity group, but that woman doesn’t have a charitable bone in her body, so I think something’s up. Anyway, since it’s only Josh at home during the day now, they’ve cut down on the other employees. Well, Wednesday is the day I do laundry. So, as usual, I had things sorted to wash and was running back and forth putting everything away. Beverly is very particular about her lingerie, which I can't say as I blame her. She has some very nice things. Some are just to die for, but anyhow, I had ran upstairs to hang up some clothes and when I came back down, you’re not gonna believe what I saw!

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I wasn’t really paying much attention as I cut across the kitchen and headed back toward the laundry room. A lot of times my mind is somewhere else. Well anyway, when I glanced up, there was Josh bending over the basket with Beverly’s lingerie. I just kind of stopped and watched him. He must not have heard me coming, because he continued without missing a beat. He reached into the basket, and took out what must have been a pair of panties. He crumpled the slinky material and shoved it into the front pocket of his jeans. I coughed, giving him warning and walked on toward the laundry room. He stood propped against the wall, smiling. I could tell from his face, that he was up to something. I looked at him, smiled, and asked in my sweetest voice, “Need something, Josh?” “Oh no, that’s okay. I found what I was looking for.” He had that sexy smirk on his face, you know the one, that ‘cat that ate the canary’ look. I swear the man drives me nuts! My pussy was very pleased with the situation and took on a life of its own. It throbbed and ached, nearly begging to be touched. I tried to ignore that he was so close to me. I almost know I could hear his heart beating. I bent over and picked up the basket, slowly dropping her things into the washer. As he stood there making small talk, I think the temperature jumped twenty degrees. He watched my every move as I carefully pulled the sexy things from the basket. I picked up a lacy, peach colored bra and held it in front of me. “This is very pretty.” Josh eyed the flimsy bra I held in my hands. “Yes, it’s one of my favorites.” The bra slipped from my fingers into the water. I leaned over and picked up the basket to finish filling the washer. Out of the corner of my eye I could see him toying

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nervously with the object in his pocket. It was hard to tell if he was uncomfortable or just antsy. Suddenly he spoke up, “Umm, I’ve got some work to do. I’ll be upstairs if you need me for anything.” I could tell something was up. “Oh, ok. I’ll catch ya later.” I attempted to come across as nonchalant, but it didn’t sound that way, even to my own ears. Josh bolted from the laundry room and headed upstairs. I tried my best to focus on the laundry and not on the burning ache between my legs. Thoughts of Josh ran through my head. The man drives me absolutely nuts! Why did he have to be so damn sexy? I swapped out the last load and made my way upstairs. The thick carpet hushed my footsteps as my mind whirled with fantasies of what I could do with Josh if only I had the opportunity. My pussy ached as I put the laundry away, lost in thoughts of Josh’s fine, tight ass and strong hands. My God, I’d love to fuck him! Placing the linens in the closet, I heard a noise coming from Josh’s office that captured my attention. It wasn’t very loud, but still recognizable as the sounds of lust. I swear I heard moaning. As I walked toward Josh’s office, I saw that the door was cracked just enough to peek inside. My God, you shouldn’t be snooping. There was no way I couldn’t look; the suspense was killing me. Ignoring my inner conscious, I stepped to the partially opened door. Just as I thought, Josh was leaned back on the huge leather sofa. From where I stood, I had a clear view of him. His head rested on the back of the sofa. His jeans were unfastened, proudly displaying his thick length. It stood fully erect and proud. My mouth watered as he lovingly stroked his cock. Josh ran a hand over his

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belly, then back down between his legs to squeeze his shaft. My eyes glazed over; it was making me so wet to watch him. He pulled the peach silk from his pocket and shoved it up to his face. It was the panties that matched the bra he had told me earlier was his favorite. He inhaled deeply and groaned. I could feel my own juices begin to trickle out, wetting my lips and inner thighs. I slipped a hand under my skirt and teased my swollen lips. My eyes never left him. He slid the panties over his chest and stomach, slowly working his way down to his cock. I could see it pulse with each groan. Slipping my fingers between my legs, I brushed against my clit. My pussy throbbed with need. Using my middle finger, I circled my hot swollen nub as Josh wrapped the panties around his shaft. The faster he stroked, the faster I rubbed my clit. I needed to get off so bad. The satiny material glided over his flesh. He gripped it tightly, enveloping his cock in its silky texture. Pushing my other hand inside my top, I slowly moved over my chest to the engorged tip of my nipple. My pussy was on fire! Slipping first one, then two fingers inside, the muscles of my cunt clamp down. My juices trickled over my fingers as I worked them in and out. Josh’s eyes were clenched together tightly and he moaned. He was as close to coming as I was. Tossing my head back in ecstasy, I bit my lip, muffling the moans of my release just as he stiffened. Groaning deeply, he poured his seed into the silken fabric. The orgasm wracked my body, pulsing wave after wave of pleasure through me. Josh collapsed against the leather, panting deeply, struggling to regain his

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composure. I stood breathing heavily against the door facing and dropped the hem of my skirt. Licking my fingers clean, I sighed. Damn it felt good to finally get off!

December 28

Well, Christmas has come and gone. So much has happened since the last time I wrote. I’m not sure where to begin. First off I guess I’ll tell you about my bonus! The week before Christmas, Josh and Beverly called me into the living room as soon as I came in to work. I really wasn’t sure what to expect, but things had been relatively quiet for the past few weeks. Beverly was hardly ever around anymore, so things had been peaceful. They were standing together in front of the fireplace, when I walked into the room. Josh’s face lit up as he called out, “Merry Christmas, Rene.” I couldn’t help myself. I know my face shows everything, so I’m pretty sure I was standing there beaming at Josh. We’ve gotten so close over the past several months. It really does make me smile to see him, and besides, Christmas as always been my favorite time of year. It’s a time to make peace with your enemies. I turned and smiled at Beverly as well, returning the greeting, “Merry Christmas.” Beverly plastered on a fake smile and chimed in, “Yes. Merry Christmas, Rene.” She handed me an envelope. I felt like a kid standing there. I could tell they were waiting for me to open it. Inside the envelope there was a beautiful card, that I assumed Josh had picked out, and a crisp one hundred dollar bill.

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I was in shock “Wow! Thank you both so much.” Josh was the first to speak up. “You’re very welcome. It’s not very much in return for all you do for us, but we do want you to know how important you are, and how much we appreciate you.” I choked back the tears. It was such a sweet gesture. “Thank you. And I want you folks to know how much I appreciate this job. You’ve been so great about working with my class schedule. You’re helping me to be able to get my degree.” Josh smiled at me again and walked over to where I stood. He leaned down and kissed me on the cheek. “We’re more than glad to help. You really mean a lot to us.” I knew the statement held a double meaning for Josh. Things had changed so much since I had first started working there. Usually during the day, he’d follow me while I worked on household stuff and we’d just talk. Sometimes it would be plans for the future, sometimes even silly things, but a lot of the time he’d confide in me. Beverly stood there stiff as usual and looking bored by the entire scene. She gave me a quick hug and wished me a Merry Christmas again. Things seemed awkward, so I excused myself. Flashing a smile at Josh, I broke the tense silence. “Well, I should get to work. Thank you both again for the wonderful gift. I left the room and got started with the usual daily routine. A couple of hours passed. I was caught up in thoughts of how I would spend my bonus. This money was definitely not going toward paying bills. I wanted to treat myself with the unexpected windfall. A manicure and pedicure sounded pretty nice. I maybe even had enough for a massage. I’d always wanted to have one, but that’s just not something I could afford to splurge on.

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Suddenly I heard shouting. I tried to make more noise, so it wouldn’t seem as if I was eavesdropping, but they were just too loud. I could hear their shouts even back in the laundry room. They were having one hell of an argument. I heard Beverly’s grating voice raised with heated emotion. “I’ll go wherever I damn well please!” She was nearly screaming. Josh retaliated quickly, “Is it too much for me to ask you to spend a few hours with me? Is it so terrible?” “Can you not get it through you’re thick head? I don’t want to spend any time with you!" “If you don’t want to be with me, Beverly, then why the fuck do you stay?" I could hear the anger and frustration in his voice. I felt like I shouldn’t be here listening to their private conversation, but I wasn’t sure what to do. Where could I go? I contemplated on just going outside till the argument was over, then I heard Beverly screech out again. “Don’t touch me, Josh! It makes me sick to feel your hands on me.” There was venom in her voice as she flung out the hurtful words. His voice boomed in anger. “My touch makes you sick? What’s this all about really? I can remember a time, not so long ago, when you begged me to do more than touch you!” “Fuck you,” she screamed. "You provide me damn security, and that’s it. I haven’t begged you for anything in a very long time.” “Oh yeah,” he shouted back. “Trust me; I know all about how long it’s been. The closest I’ve been to you in a very long time is to fuck’n jack off into your panties. How do

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you think that makes me feel, Beverly?” “You’re just disgusting. I have a meeting. I’ll be back later.” “Meeting for what? Or should I ask, meeting with whom? I know you, Beverly, that hot little pussy of yours is getting some action somewhere!” “Well it sure isn’t from you, now is it?” she screamed again. The door slammed and filled the house, but only for a moment. Suddenly there was a loud crash in the living room. I heard glass shattering as I ran down the hall. Josh was sagged down in the floor, his face in his hands, sobbing. There was a heavy statue lying in a pile of broken glass in front of the curio cabinet. It broke my heart to see him there on the floor. He seemed as broken as the glass. I spoke softly, “Are you ok?” “No, I’m not ok. Am I such a miserable, low life bastard that she honestly hates me?” He was hurt, angry, and bitter. To be honest, I’m surprised things hadn’t exploded before they did. There’s only so much a person can stand, ya know? Beverly had been pushing for months. “No, Josh. You’re not any of those things. The man I know is good, kind and decent. A man that any woman would be proud to call her own.” He looked up at me. The pain in his face tore me in two. “Am I now? Well, apparently my wife doesn’t seem to think so!” Now it was my turn to be angry. I was angry that Beverly was such an idiot that she didn’t realize how lucky she was. I probably should have kept my thoughts to myself, but the stubbornness in me wouldn’t stand for it. I felt like I’d explode if I kept my mouth shut for even one second longer. “Well, you’re wife is a fuck’n idiot who doesn’t

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appreciate how lucky she is to be with someone like you. Some of us would give anything to be in her shoes!” I realized I had said too much, laid too much of my heart out in the open. Josh’s face softened as he looked at me. My chest pounded and it was hard for me to breathe. What if he found out? There was no way I could hold his gaze, so I quickly changed the subject. “I’ll get this mess picked up." I nearly ran from the room before he had a chance to say anything to me. I felt like such a fool! I was thankful for the excuse to get out of there to get a hold on myself. I went to the pantry and gathered up the broom and dustpan, attempting to calm myself before I went back into there. His eyes were on me as I re-entered the room. I walked over to the mess and started sweeping up the glass. Josh crossed the room and picked up the dustpan. “Here, let me help. I caused it.” “You don’t have to.” “Hush, woman,” he said with a smile. I swept the glass into a pile, while Josh gathered all the bigger pieces and placed them in the wastebasket. Leaning over, I stooped down to retrieve the statue from the shards of broken glass. When I stood back up, I came face to face with him. His eyes were focused on the front of my blouse. Self consciously, I looked down. The front of my blouse was gaping open exposing the tops of my breasts. I felt the heat climb into my face as I quickly reached down to refasten the buttons. Josh reached out, pausing my hands. He gently brushed his fingers over my exposed skin. I closed my eyes and sighed, silently willing him to continue. He slid his hand inside my blouse, cupping the fullness of my breast. My skin tingled with

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excitement. I stood perfectly still, terrified if I moved the spell would be broken. He shoved the wastebasket that stood between us aside with his foot and moved closer. He finished unfastening my blouse and pushed it over my shoulders. My mind was in a whirl; everything seemed so unreal. Sliding the straps down over my arms, he pulled the front of my bra down. My heavy breasts sprung forward, finally free from the tight confines of my bra. “Beautiful,” he whispered, leaning over to softly press his lips against the paleness of my skin. My body shuddered with his touch. I had fantasized about his mouth on my skin, but this was so much better than fantasy. He cupped both breasts and lowered his face between them, squeezing them against his face. He turned to the side and flicked my nipple with his tongue. Fire shot thru my body, once again settling in my pussy. Opening his mouth wider, he sucked it firmly into his mouth. The suction of his mouth sent electricity through me. I threaded my fingers in his hair, drawing him closer—urging him on. His hand slid up my thigh, edging closer to my pussy. He sucked at my nipples; the pale pink tips now a dusky rose color from his mouth. My conscience battled the fire in my body. I had to be the stronger one. He was in a state of distress. Despite of how good he felt, it wasn’t right. Not this way. We couldn’t do this. “Josh,” I whispered softly. He seemed to sense my hesitation and looked up at me. “God, Rene. I’m so sorry. I got carried away.” “No, don’t be sorry. I loved the way you made me feel. It’s just…”

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“Shhhh, I know. Oh baby, please forgive me. You’ve seen enough around here to know my marriage is crumbling. We’ve become so close over the past months. You’re just so sweet and so…” His voice trailed off as I readjusted my bra and buttoned my blouse. “I’m so what?” I had to know what he was thinking. I dunno, call it morbid curiosity, but I had to know the answer. “You’re so delicious,” he said finally. Do you have any idea what it does to me watching you around here all day, knowing you’re off limits?” I shook my head, barely believing the words he spoke. “Well, I’ll tell you. It nearly drives me crazy!” Part of me was so excited by his words, but another part was confused. Was I somehow responsible for the problems he was having in his marriage? Was I making things harder on him than they already were? I blinked back the tears, forcing myself to be strong. I would not be a problem for him. “Josh, if you’d like my resignation, I totally understand.” His eyes widened as he looked into my face. “No silly girl. It’s not your resignation that I want.” His eyes were stormy with the lust that burned in them. That familiar heat crept into my face as I caught his meaning. “Oh, umm, I thought…umm…” Shit! I’m stammering like an idiot. He smiled and leaned over again, pressing his lips softly against my lips. “Shh; all in good time.” He kissed me again and turned to leave. “I’m going out for a while, but I’ll be back soon.

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January 20

Well, things are really rolling around here. Beverly is pretty much only home at night, and sometimes not even then. There have been several days that I’ve come in to work only to find that she’s been gone overnight. A couple of times she’s even stayed gone the entire weekend! She always claims its some type of charity event, but I’m not falling for it, and neither is Josh. Even though there have been no more incidences like what happened that day in the family room, the electricity is there. I want him so bad I can taste it! But, I’ll be patient. Something is definitely going on, I know Josh well enough that I can tell. For the past week or so he’s been just downright bubbly. I was dying to find out what was making him so happy, but I refused to ask. We hadn’t really had a lot of time to talk lately. He had been going out a lot during the day, and when he came back he was right back in his office. Maybe I didn’t want to know what was going on. Maybe he’d finally realized it was over with Beverly and moved on to someone else. I know, I shouldn’t be jealous, but a part of me was. I wanted him for myself. Around noon he came downstairs to have lunch. He walked straight to the refrigerator and started pulling out things to make a sandwich. I had just finished wiping

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everything down and was about to take a break when he spoke up, “Come have lunch with me.” His blue eyes seemed to dance as he stood there grinning at me. I was ticked at him. He was crazy as hell if he thought he could turn me on and off like a faucet. We’d barely spoken half a dozen words the past few days, and here he was acting like everything was normal. “No, thanks. I’ve got to get busy on the laundry.” His expression turned serious. “Fuck the laundry; I want you to have lunch with me.” I played it cool. He wasn’t gonna know how upset I was with him. “I’m sorry, but I have work to do.” I turned to walk from the room, but he was at my side in a flash. He took my arm and turned me around, “Rene, what’s wrong with you?” His face was angry and confused, but I was angry too. I felt like a total idiot. The heat climbed into my face as I looked him square in the eye. “Well, you haven’t had much to say to me in the past week, so why should I have lunch with you today? Obviously something’s made you happy and it sure as hell ain't me!” My body shook with anger. Josh looked at me wide-eyed with disbelief, and started to laugh. Not a quiet laugh, mind you, but a full-blown, ‘throw your head back’ laugh. “I’m glad you think it’s so fuck’n funny!” He grabbed me and hugged me, “Aww baby, don’t be mad. I’ve been busy and just haven’t had the time to explain till today.” I jerked away from him. My anger slowly melted, his laughter wearing down my resolve to stay mad. “Explain what?” He half turned away from me in mock exasperation. “Well, I had some good news to share, but I guess you don’t want to hear it.” His lips curled mischievously as he

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looked at me. “Damn it, Josh. I swear I’ll whack you with this broom if you don’t tell me.” Now I was laughing. Hell, why did he have to look so sexy? He laughed at me and dropped to his knees in a fake begging stance, “Please don’t beat me.” “Oh, get up, goofy.” I laughed at his silliness. It had to be something really good for him to be acting this way. “So what’s going on?” “Say you’ll have lunch with me and I’ll tell you every tiny detail.” “Well forever more! Ok, I’ll have lunch with you. Now fill me in.” Josh moved back to the counter to work on the sandwiches while I put away the broom and washed up. I fixed glasses of iced tea while he filled our plates with a sandwich, chips and a pickle. After everything was back in the refrigerator, we sat down at the table. “Mmm, this looks good.” He smiled at me, and then took a big bite. I was growing impatient. “Havin’ a good time making me wait?” I picked up a chip and nibbled at it, waiting for him to begin. “Ok, ok. You’ve been patient long enough. Well, you remember that day right after Christmas when Beverly and I had that huge argument?” I wondered if he had already forgotten our afternoon together. My face burned. “Umm, yes. It was the same day as…” “Shit, baby. That was a stupid question. Of course you remember, that was the day I almost made love to you.” His blue eyes nearly black as passion flashed across them. “Well, I started to wonder.” I laughed, inwardly relieved.

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“Of course, I’ll never forget that day. It was the best day of my life in two ways.” “Two ways? I don’t understand.” “Remember I went out after we got a hold on our emotions? Well, I went to see a friend of mine who’s a private investigator.” “Private investigator?” I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. What in the world was going on? “Yep. I had been suspicious of Beverly for a long time. I knew our marriage was in shambles, but I thought it was somehow my fault. You know, maybe I wasn’t doing something right for her. Well, that day when she made her hateful remarks before she slammed out of the house. I knew deep down what was really going on, but you helped me realize it wasn’t me. There was nothing wrong with the way I loved her or the man that I am. She was only sticking around for my money and that pissed me off more than anything. Her greed was keeping me from the person who would truly make me happy. There’s no way I was going to let her get away with that.” “Well that’s not fair to either of you.” I really wasn’t sure where this conversation was leading. Butterflies has somehow filled my stomach, there was no way I could eat. He leaned over and kissed me tenderly. “Baby, that’s not fair to us. I won't drag you in the middle of a huge mess only to allow her to smear your name through the mud. I’ve already started divorce proceedings and I knew she’d pull out all stops to keep her claws in my wallet.” “Is that why you’ve been distant with me?” “Partly, even though we’ve not really done anything, I didn’t want to give her any ammunition to use against us.”

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“Josh, you should have said something to me about what was going on. I had all sorts of things running through my mind.” “I knew you probably did, but I just couldn’t risk it. Not until I got word back from my friend. Seems that dear Beverly has been doing lots of ‘charity’ work down on her knees with the Director of the Hopes and Dreams foundation.” “Holy shit! Are you sure? Is his information reliable?” “Baby, my friend has pictures, phone records, and recordings of all their nasty little ‘charity’ events. I’ve got her by the short hairs without a doubt!” “Oh, my God. I can’t believe she’d be so stupid and slip up like this.” “Well, Ben is very good at his job. I knew eventually she’d get careless. It just happened a lot sooner than I expected.” “So now what happens?” “Well, when she decides to drag her ass home, I’ll show her what I have and tell her to leave. Maybe her boyfriend will let her move into his house.”

April 23

Well it’s been three months since all hell broke loose around here. Josh confronted Beverly with the pictures, so there was no way she could deny anything.

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Thank God I wasn’t here for the final takedown; that would’ve been too nerve wracking. I didn’t envy Josh one bit. I know he didn’t enjoy it, but I think after all the hell she put him through it did give him some satisfaction to finally be on the up end of the stick. Beverly left quietly, just like Josh had predicted. She only took a few clothes with her. We heard she had moved in with her boyfriend. I was surprised the divorce was as peaceful as it was. Josh offered her a fair settlement and she gladly accepted. I guess she knew she didn’t have any other choice. I’ve still been going to work four days a week as usual. Since things have finally settled down around here and I decided it was time for me to make my move. We had both suffered long enough. I arrived at work on Thursday morning in my usual uniform. It was so hard to act like nothing was going on. I had worked out all the details for my little plan. It was going to be easier than I thought. Josh had an errand to run, so he was pretty distracted...Since it was about an hour’s drive round trip, I knew I’d have a little time before he made it back. I headed upstairs as soon as he left. My pussy was tingling with excitement. I went into the huge master bathroom. I had cleaned it often enough I knew where everything was. Now it was my turn. I turned on the faucet, filling the tub with hot steamy water. For good measure I added some of my favorite bubble bath I’d brought with me. I quickly peeled off the drab uniform and tossed it on the floor. The bathroom is the size of my bedroom, so it was a treat pretending I was the mistress of the house. I lit a few candles, pulled my hair up and turned down the lights. I slipped into the steamy water, letting it envelope me as I sank into the frothy mass of bubbles. The water was so hot, my flesh burned as it surrounded me. As I sank lower in the tub, the water eased up onto my breasts, causing my already hard nipples to

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pucker. I could see the stiff dusky pebbles peeking out of the white foam. I pinched them between my finger and thumb, sending shock waves down to my clit. I wanted to be all nice and clean when Josh came home for his surprise. I finished washing and stepped out of the tub. Grabbing the fine bath sheet I had laid out earlier, I rubbed my already pink skin vigorously to dry off. I wrapped the towel around me and headed into the bedroom. I still had a few things to get ready for the next part of my plan. I walked over to what used to be Beverly’s dresser and went through her lingerie. Josh hadn’t thrown it out. She had some really nice stuff, but I was looking for something in particular. After some searching, I picked the peach silk panties and a matching bra then laid them on the dresser. Beverly and I are about the same size, so I knew it would all fit. These were the panties I’d seen Josh playing with that day in his office. I turned on the stereo and arranged the pillows on the bed. After lighting a few more candles and turning down the lights, I laid back on the king size bed to wait for Josh. I hadn’t been waiting long when I heard the front door open. I got a little nervous at first, worrying that I was making a mistake, but soon I heard his familiar voice calling to me. “René, are you up there?” “Yes, I’m up here in the bedroom. Could you come in here for a minute? I need you to help me with something.” I tried to keep my voice steady. I didn’t want him to suspect anything. “Sure,” he called out. I could hear him clunking up the stairs. I hurried to the bathroom to wait for him to make it into the bedroom. My pussy was growing wetter by the second. He walked through the bedroom door and called out again. “Where are you?”

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I stepped out of the bathroom wrapped only in my towel. “I’m right here.” His eyes widened in surprise then I watched the corners of his mouth curl into a smile. “Uh, umm, René, what’s going on?” He licked his lips in anticipation. I felt bolder than I ever had in my life. You could feel the raw sexuality in the room. I knew he was dying to see what was under the towel, so I dropped it to the floor. His eyes traveled down to my feet and then back up. I could see the fire building in his eyes as his focus settled on the fullness of my breast. “I told you I need you to help me.” I smiled and licked my lips as I walked past him. My nipple brushed against his arm as I closed the bedroom door. The excitement sizzled through me. “Wha—what do you need me to do?” He was so nervous; I swear the poor man was shaking. There’s no telling how long it had been since he’d seen a woman fully naked. “Just come over here and stand by the bed for me.” I took him by the hand and led him to the foot of the bed. He stood there with that same stunned look on his face. “Are you ok?” I was kind of worried about him. He really seemed shook up and I could see the little beads of sweat that had popped out on his forehead. “Uh...uh, oh yeah. Damn, I’m more than ok. Just at a loss for words right now I guess.” We laughed a little and I leaned over and kissed him lightly. Standing in front of him, I started unbuttoning his shirt. After the first two buttons he grabbed it and ripped it the rest of the way. Buttons flew all over the room, but he didn’t seem to care. I took it off him and threw it on the floor beside the bed. Next I took off his pants in the same deliberate way, slowly teasing him as I unfastened his belt and slid the zipper down. I shoved his jeans over his hips and down his legs. As he stepped out of them, I tossed them in the crumpled pile with his ruined shirt. Next came the shoes

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and then finally his socks. Everything was off now but his underwear. “Now what?” he asked playing along with my game. “Now you watch.” I said and gently pushed him back onto the bed. I walked over to the dresser and picked up the peach lingerie. He lay on the bed watching me as I slipped my feet into the panties and slowly pulled them up, barely covering my bush. “Uh, René, those are Beverly’s things.” “Oh yeah, I know Josh, but there’s one correction. They used to be Beverly’s things. Now they’re mine. She was such a bitch; she didn’t deserve nice things or a good man like you. So I’m going to have both.” I looked down at the bulge in Josh’s underwear waiting for a reaction to my bold statement. I got my answer. His cock was standing at full mast. I could see the smooth head peeking out the top band of his underwear. I guess he apparently liked my idea, or at least it was definite his cock did. I finished getting dressed, then climbed back on the bed with him. I straddled his chest and let my crotch rest just inches from his face. “I wonder what Beverly would say if she knew my pussy juice was soaking through her precious panties?” I reached down between my legs, brushing my hand over the silky fabric. “Well, I don’t think she’d be very happy. In fact, I know she wouldn’t be. She’d be furious with you.” “Good, she needs to be. She should’ve been a little nicer to both of us; then maybe something like this wouldn’t be happening. Don’t you agree?” Josh lay there smiling as I shifted myself to slide up over his face. The damp crotch of Beverly’s panties just inches above his face. Josh moaned as I lowered myself down to cover his mouth and nose. “Take a deep whiff; this definitely isn’t Beverly’s

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pussy.” Josh inhaled deeply and I kept talking to him. “Damn, Josh, these panties feel so good against my skin. Do you like the way I fill out her panties?” “Oh, God, yes,” he groaned. I grabbed the fabric on both sides and pulled it up tight, letting it slide between my lips and the cheeks of my ass. Josh nibbled at them, teasing them with his tongue. I rose to my knees, just above him so he couldn’t reach me. He groaned, grabbing at my sides as he tried to pull me back down. “Huh uh, not yet.” “Why did you do that?” he asked through clenched teeth. “I want to taste you.” “Oh, you will, but I want to taste you first. Remember, this is my game and I make the rules.” I turned around with my ass in his face, the peach silk still stretched tightly into my slit. His hands latched on to my sides, pulling me to his mouth. I wanted to see my prize without the covering. I leaned over and flipped back the waistband on his underwear. Now it was my turn to get wide eyed. His cock was nice and thick, just the way I like ‘em, and solid as a rock. I licked my lips, eager to get a chance at him. His cock sprang to attention as I shoved his underwear down and wrapped my fingers around it. He looked so tasty. I had to have a lick. “Oh my God, René,” he growled. “What baby?” I purred, then slid my tongue back down his shaft. I felt his body tense beneath me. His groans told me my tongue was hitting all the right places. His hands roamed over my ass and he slipped his fingers under the edge of the elastic on my panties. I realized he was attempting to take them off, so I stopped him. I wanted to enjoy this new power. “No, don’t take ‘em off. Eat my pussy while I wear the panties.” I shoved my

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crotch into his face and Josh immediately dug in, feasting on my silk covered pussy. His mouth felt so good, I pushed my ass further back against his face. I was goin’ nuts. I couldn’t wait any longer. I took his cock in my hand and buried it deep inside my mouth. I could feel him in the back of my throat as I pumped it in and out. My tongue worked up the side of his shaft and swirled over the smooth crown again and again while he worked on my pussy and ass. Josh sucked at me through the fabric, driving me crazy. My clit was hard as a rock. I knew we were both close, but I wanted to feel that huge cock inside me. I rose up on my knees. The silky fabric was soaked with a mixture of my juices and the wetness from where he’d sucked on the crotch. I turned back around to face him, poised just barely out of reach. I looked at his cock standing below me, thick and proud. The veins bulged along the sides, throbbing as his heart pulsed. Spreading my legs wide, I pulled the panties to the side, giving him a full view of my open pussy. He licked his lips, as his eyes rolled back. “Oh God yes,” he groaned. He held his cock as I eased myself all the way down on him. This had been a long time coming. I was definitely ready for him. My pussy was so wet and tight, his cock slid straight in. That juicy thick cock of his filled me completely. I sat straight up on him as he held my hips to steady me. Josh bucked wildly under me as we slammed into each other over and over. My heart pounded and I couldn’t breathe. I fucked him like he was the last man on earth. I guess it was a mixture of all the excitement, because it didn’t take me long at all to cum. I felt that familiar fire slowly work its way up toward my pussy. I rode him faster, urging the explosion on with every stroke. My breasts bounced wildly. I could feel the walls of my pussy clamp down on his cock. I slammed into him harder and faster, trying

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to make my orgasm last as long as I could. He arched his back and I felt him unload into me. I clenched him harder with my pussy with each thrust. As our orgasms subsided I laid over beside him, kissing him deeply. His hands brushed over the peach silk covering my ass. Neither of us spoke for a while. Then Josh spoke up. “You know, when I saw you put on those things, I was worried it would make me feel weird, but it didn’t at all. That was so fuck’n hot; all I could think about was how good it was going to feel to finally feel my cock inside you. “Well, these are mine now, not Beverly’s. You know what they say, if you don’t take care of things at home, someone else will be more than glad to step in and take your place.” Josh’s eyes twinkled and he laughed. “Well, you know what this means don’t you?” “No, what?” “We’re gonna have to play a lot more of these little games of yours. I’m anxious to see what other prizes you have in store for me.” I looked at him and laughed. “Oh don’t worry; I can take care of all the ‘hard’ work around here.” “You’re such a dedicated employee,” Josh said laughingly. “Always aim to please, sir.”

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