eBooks are not transferable. They cannot be sold, shared or given away as it is an infringement on the copyright of this work. This book is a work of fiction. The names, characters, places, and incidents are products of the writer’s imagination or have been used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, actual events, locale or organizations is entirely coincidental. Samhain Publishing, Ltd. 577 Mulberry Street, Suite 1520 Macon GA 31201 Reaching Higher Copyright © 2009 by Ann Somerville ISBN: 978-1-60504-353-1 Edited by Anne Scott Cover by Anne Cain All Rights Are Reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews. First Samhain Publishing, Ltd. electronic publication: January 2009 www.samhainpublishing.com
Dedication
For Gaelan, my two Pauls and Misa for all their help, support and friendship. And my thanks to Anne Scott for working so hard and patiently.
Ann Somerville
Chapter One
Kine Raelne had been on the planet known as Quarn for sixty-two planetary days and had spent all but ten of them in custody of one form or another. Quarn had also claimed the life of three of his colleagues, so knowing it would be his home for the rest of his life didn’t fill him with joy. Even if, in the circumstances, his life was likely to be a rather short one. After a quick and perfunctory trial for espionage, murder and invasion, the tribunal’s judgement had been brief. Raelne hadn’t expected them to waste time. From when the mission was first invoked he, like the others, had known they risked being imprisoned or executed as hostile aliens and spies. Their copilot Fane, being military, had prepared them for what was likely to happen. That preparation had dulled the shock, which was something to be grateful for. The two judges’ revulsion towards him and his teammates had been an unnecessary insult, though. They hadn’t lost friends. Yes, some of the winged humanoids had died through pure accident, and Raelne regretted that most sincerely. But none of them had been tortured, as Captain Marpe had been. A bit of tolerance from the men handing down the death sentence might have been gracious. But he found it hard to work up the passion to care. He just wanted them to do what they planned to do, and quickly. He was sick of this cell, sick of this planet, sick of knowing he would die a criminal’s death far from home without his family ever learning what had happened to him, and sick of grieving for his lost teammates. He was sick of not being able to sleep from worry about his fate, though at least that was now resolved. Death for all three of them. Sooner rather than later, he hoped. He hadn’t had a chance to speak to the other two since they’d been removed from the tiny provincial jail just after capture. Harnol’s usual cockiness had been subdued by the trial and sentence. Fane had stared grimly at the judges for the entire process, but at the 4
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end, had turned to Raelne and given him a sharp nod, as if to say, “That’s that, then.” Raelne would have liked a few minutes with him to talk about what had happened, but the three of them had been separated and returned to their cells almost immediately after the sentence had been delivered. Since then, his routine was much as it had been. Lie on his bunk, stare at the cracks in the ceilings, and every few hours, ignore the unappetizing low-protein food delivered on a tray through a slot in the door, and hand it back uneaten an hour or so later. He wasn’t in an ordinary prison, he knew that much. They’d gone nowhere near the main city on this ball of dirt and instead had been taken to a military facility some distance from it. Suaj, his telepathic interpreter, had explained that it was considered politically expedient not to have a public trial in the capital. Raelne had no quibble with the logic. It wasn’t like the result would have been any different, or that the Quarnians would have been treated with more consideration on Tuzax. It had all been fair and predictable and depressing, and why the hell was it taking so long for the military to hang three unlucky aliens? He’d actually managed to sleep that night, but his dreams made him wish he hadn’t. Morning light and the same bland breakfast had done nothing to lift his spirits. No one had come near him since the day before. Maybe the means of execution was death by boredom. He wondered how long that would take. He did consider it ironic that they’d waited until the gunshot wound in his leg had healed before they’d decided to kill him. Some time after the breakfast he hadn’t eaten was removed—he had no idea exactly how long because there was no direct sunlight to measure shadows by, and of course they’d taken his watch—the cell door opened. Suaj and a guard stood in the doorway. “Come,” Suaj told him. Raelne sat up. “Already? Good. My last meal sucked, though.” Suaj frowned. “What are you talking about?” “Isn’t this time for goodbye? I’m under sentence of death.” “You won’t die today, Mister Kine. Come.” Bugger. “Let me just check I haven’t left the stove on.”
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Suaj’s thin, dark face didn’t register any appreciation of the joke, but the man didn’t seem to have a sense of humour, so that wasn’t a surprise. Raelne was shackled and cuffed as usual, and taken out into mockingly brilliant winter sunshine to where an animal-hauled conveyance stood in a dusty courtyard. Rejers, that was the Quarnian name for the beasts. Ugly damn things with the shaggy hide and long thick neck, but they seemed to be the main work animals here. He was surprised the military used them because they had automobiles, but maybe it was a money-saving thing. Two guards lifted him into the vehicle, and one climbed into the driving seat and snapped the reins. Suaj sat in the back with Raelne. “Feel like telling me what’s going on?” Raelne asked as they pulled away and set off smartly down a long road that appeared to run to the other side of the base. “It isn’t my place.” “Do you know?” Suaj turned to him. “Yes.” “Practice your Quarnian,” he said, in Quarnian. It was a phrase the man had used a lot, so Raelne picked it up right away. “Why?” he answered in Tusan. “I’m a dead man walking. Where are Fane and Harnol?” “It isn’t my place.” “You don’t strike me as someone who usually lets that stop you.” But Suaj wouldn’t be baited, so Raelne had to rein in his impatience. The ride took them mere minutes, the rattly cart moving at some speed down the gravel road. Raelne figured whoever wanted to see him didn’t want the common soldiers to have a chance to gawk. Those who looked up certainly stopped and stared. It might not just be at him, either. He stuck out, he knew. He was shorter, stockier, paler-skinned and darker-haired than any of the Quarn residents. Their cursed “Angel” DNA made them tall and light-boned, and gave them all skin the colour of burned rust, dark brown eyes, and white hair, shocking against the dark complexions. But Suaj was odder still, and it had taken Raelne a little while to work out why. At times the puzzle had been a useful distraction from his misery. Suaj’s skin was almost
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coal black in colour, much darker than any Quarnian Raelne had seen, though his eyes were lighter, hazel-green. His silvery-white hair was short, none of his scalp showing through, it was so dense. The hairline at the back was a long way down his neck, disappearing under the high-collared shirts the man always wore. Only when Raelne put that clue together with Suaj’s unusual height, his completely hairless hands, the fact he always wore his cuffs tightly buttoned, and the strange shape of the man’s shoulders, did he finally realise what he was looking at. A chimerical human with an almost complete “Angelic” morph. He’d only worked it out during the farce of a trial, in fact. The cart slowed down—apparently they were nearly there, wherever “there” was. “So what happened to your wings?” Raelne asked casually as the cart stopped. Suaj stared at him, opened his mouth, then snapped it shut. “None of your business.” Raelne grinned to himself. Nice to know his brain hadn’t completely turned to mush during his imprisonment. The soldier-driver hauled him out of the cart, and Raelne in his shackles shufflewalked with his two companions over to the low-set building to which the cart had pulled up. Another anonymous prefabricated military construction—strange how universal that concept was. The soldiers at the door snapped to attention and saluted Suaj who, though he didn’t wear a uniform, apparently held some high rank. Suaj led the way inside, and some way down a long corridor, he entered an office. Another soldier sitting behind a desk and apparently acting as a personal assistant saluted, then went through a door behind to announce them. Moments later the man returned and spoke to Suaj, who led Raelne and his guard into the inner office. A tall man in the dull grey uniform of the local army rose and spoke. Suaj translated. “This is Commandant Hedike. He welcomes you, Mister Kine.” “Thanks. I’d shake his hand but…” Raelne indicated how he couldn’t lift his hands above his waist. Hedike gestured that Suaj and Raelne should sit. All very polite for the condemned man, Raelne considered.
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“The commandant wishes to inform you that the government of Quarn has decided to grant you and your fellow convicts mercy. Your sentences have been commuted by order of the president to life imprisonment without parole.” The churn in Raelne’s guts was fiercer than when he’d received the death sentence the day before. “Tell him thanks but no thanks. I’d rather hang than rot in prison.” “It’s not your choice.” “Tell him anyway.” Suaj did so, and he and the commandant exchanged a few words. “He says he understands your feelings, which is why he wishes to make you an offer.” “I don’t negotiate with a gun, prison sentence or death order to my head, Suaj. Hang me or let me go.” “Are you so ready to die?” “I just want to go home. If I can’t do that, I’m not interested in any offer, and if you put me in prison for the rest of my life, I’ll find a way to kill myself.” The man at the desk barked impatiently and Suaj answered. Raelne occupied himself by wondering if the “hair” on Suaj’s skinny body covered him all over, and if there were others like him around. He wondered how many telepaths the army had at its disposal. There were at least three because they’d acted as interpreters at the trial for the Tuzai prisoners. Thank the deity for his mental shields. The Tuzai preparatory research had got that much right, at least. Of course, he wouldn’t have been made to go on this mission if he hadn’t been so damn adept at the shield building. If he’d known then what he knew now, he’d have been a lot stupider during testing. Suaj and Hedike stopped talking, and the commandant steepled his fingers and looked at Raelne, before saying something in what sounded a conciliatory tone, Suaj translating directly. “Mister Kine, I understand your desire to return to your home, but you’re a convicted criminal. An enemy alien. I can’t allow you to leave without obtaining reparation.” “But you’d be prepared to allow me to leave if you got that?”
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“We’d be prepared to consider it, though whether it’s possible, I don’t know, since your vessel is damaged.” Hope, an emotion that had deserted him ever since he and the others were captured, began to rise uncertainly within him. “But if I can fix it and do you some favours, we could leave?” “I would be prepared to make that agreement after discussing it with my superiors. What I need to know from you is how much you are prepared to do to expiate your crimes against our indigenous population and to compensate them for their losses.” “They tortured our people to death!” Suaj’s forehead wrinkled. “I know nothing about that,” he said, clearly speaking for himself. Commandant Hedike said something and Suaj explained. The commandant also seemed puzzled. “He asks why you believe this?” “We found Captain Marpe’s body. He’d only been dead for a couple of days at most. Him and our astrogator. Marpe’s face had been mutilated. His cheek…” Raelne swallowed, remembering the ghastly sight of the gaping flesh. “Since your Angels found out so much about our plans, he must have been forced to talk under torture. How can I trust people who use such tactics?” Suaj translated and Hedike spoke. “He says he’ll investigate but this is the first he’s heard of it. Torture is strictly illegal and also inefficient. It hasn’t been used by our government in hundreds of years. There’s no need for it with my abilities.” “Marpe had mental shields. We all do, you know that.” “We don’t torture people. I can’t speak for the wild Angels.” Raelne noted the term, but it wasn’t important now. “You understand I have cause to disbelieve you.” “Yes. We have cause to distrust you also, Mister Kine. The commandant is sincere. You should listen to him.” So Raelne agreed to hear him out, and he had to admit it was more reasonable than he could have hoped. The reason that Quarn was so backward technologically was, as he already knew, because they had lost too much of their population to maintain the
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knowledge and education. The society had slipped back into what was sustainable at the time, machinery mothballed, data archived until the population was large enough to exploit it again. Their scientists, of which Suaj was one, continued to work and reestablish inventions and innovations. They were frustrated so much of what they were doing had already been done and documented—but the ancients had locked away that knowledge into digital storage for which the Quarnians no longer had working readers or usable prints. If they could build or repair a reader for the carefully preserved storage disks, they could shortcut so much of what they did now. A simple goal, and one for which Raelne could already see several possible solutions. “But then you’d expect me to hang around and help you build the machines and so on. You’d never want me to leave.” “No,” Suaj admitted calmly. “But a deal’s a deal. We can offer you incentives to stay. But if you fulfil the primary request, then, if our government consents, you’d be allowed to repair your spacecraft and return home.” “If.” “It’s by no means a certainty. The commandant needs your assent before he can begin negotiations.” “And if I try and fail with my best efforts?” “I don’t know what position we would take then. He could ask.” “And my friends? Have they been asked? Will they agree?” “They have been spoken to separately. Mister Joese is considering the offer. Mister Geril has refused. Were you to persuade them to assist, it would only be to your benefit.” The commandant waited patiently while Suaj made his explanations but now spoke. “He wants to know what you decide.” Raelne considered it, and couldn’t think of any reason not to help. It wasn’t like they were asking for Tuzai military secrets or anything. Fane would be dead against any cooperation—he hadn’t even wanted Raelne to learn any Quarnian, but Raelne thought that was a pointless objection. It was one of the few issues over which Raelne had ever
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seriously disagreed with Fane, but Raelne wasn’t in the army. He refused to split the world up into enemies and allies the way the military insisted on doing. “I… Okay. So long as it’s strictly limited to your own data, and there is no attempt to use us to build weapons or attack capability.” Suaj nodded. “Then he can find out if your government will agree. If they do, I give my word I’ll do my very best to complete the task. I can’t guarantee I’ll succeed, you know that.” Suaj tilted his head. “That’s fair.” He reported Raelne’s answer and Hedike replied, his expression still serious. “He needs time. You must return to the brig for now, but he’ll endeavour to improve your conditions. Is there something that you particularly wish?” “Better food. Some paper too, so I can get started on a dictionary. If I’m going to be working with you, I’ll need that.” “These will be provided. You must leave now.” “In chains?” Suaj turned and spoke to the soldier at the door. He stepped up smartly and removed Raelne’s leg shackles. “The handcuffs are necessary.” “All right. Who’s going to be working with me on this?” “I will.” “Will you tell me about your wings then?” The man’s hazel eyes, usually expressionless, turned cold as frozen stone. “I offer you advice, Mister Kine. I like your people as little as you like mine. I may have to work with you, but don’t consider me a friend, and refrain from personal remarks.” Raelne bowed his head. “My apologies.” Suaj didn’t acknowledge his words. “We must go.” Raelne nodded to the commandant who smiled pleasantly, and Suaj led him outside. The sunshine didn’t seem to mock him any more. Instead, it offered hope, life—a second chance. “I just want to go home,” he murmured. Suaj replied without looking at him. “Maybe you should not have left.”
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“Bit late for that regret, don’t you think?” “My opinion is unimportant. I have business here. For now, you’ll be returned to your cell, Mister Kine.” “Rael, if we’re going to be working together.” “That remains to be seen, Mister Kine.” Suaj nodded at the guard, who took Raelne’s arm and led him over to the cart. Last Raelne saw of his touchy interpreter, he was disappearing back into the building. I really shouldn’t piss him off, he reflected ruefully. At least, before he went home. Please, Zoka, he begged his deity, let them agree to that.
The decision to make the deal with him came so fast that he barely had time to enjoy the little luxuries Suaj had negotiated for him. One edible meal, two hours or so making notes on what he had learned of Quarnian, and then Suaj was back. This time, Raelne left the cell without handcuffs or shackles, though still under guard. “They agreed? To everything?” he asked as he followed Suaj out of the brig. “You must devote all your normal working hours to our tasks. You may work in your spare time on repairing your vessel. If you fail on our projects, it will be up to me to assess if you have given it your best. However, we’re to endeavour to persuade you that staying will be of mutual benefit.” It was difficult to tell with Suaj’s characteristically unemotional delivery, but there seemed to be just a little sourness as he made that last statement. “You’d prefer it personally if I left.” “My preference is irrelevant. Your skills and knowledge are of enormous value to us, as you’re aware. Were you to stay, you could command any price, ask for any privilege.” “Not really interested in that, Suaj. I want to go home because my family’s there. If I didn’t have them, I guess I could be tempted by the challenge of it all. Rebuilding a society’s technology—that’s a pretty incredible project.” “Indeed.” “Where are we going?”
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“Your new quarters, and then to the workshop.” “Wait—what about my friends? Did they agree yet?” Suaj shook his head. “You have permission to visit them and attempt to persuade them. I suggest you do this tomorrow.” “Okay. So what’s my legal status? Am I a free man?” “You’re a prisoner on license. A presidential pardon is available should you wish to remain in our society, and if you fulfil your side of the agreement.” “But for now, I have a guard.” “For your protection as much as ours.” They emerged from the brig building, and Raelne inhaled fresh air that didn’t smell of piss or harsh detergent. No cart and smelly old rejer for him this time. Now he was a prized possession, he merited a blocky dark grey automobile that made nearly as much unnecessary noise as rejer farts. They drove across the base again, though in a different direction from earlier that day. This area seemed to be more residential—gardens with children’s toys strewn about, and civilians walking along grassy footpaths. It looked to him as if he was being taken to the officer quarters and Suaj confirmed this when asked. “Do I get paid or anything? What about rank? Authority?” Suaj hesitated. “Commandant Hedike asked me to request your requirements in this regard.” Holy Zoka. They really did want him. “I’ll make a list.” “I’m sure.” Raelne grinned at the slightly dry tone. Understanding Suaj was an exercise in nuances. At least now, he’d have the time to learn those. “This time yesterday, I was a dead man. Now I’m valuable. Life’s strange.” Suaj didn’t deign to answer that. The automobile pulled up outside a tidy little prefab house that even had a tidy little prefab lawn out front. “This is mine?”
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“Yes. For now, you’ll wear fatigues, but we can arrange civilian clothes if you choose. A selection of items has been readied for you.” Indeed it had. In a decent-sized bedroom with built-in wooden wardrobes, there was a generous assortment of army fatigues, casual clothes and underwear, as well as grooming items and toiletries. A watch too—wind up, but it would work well enough. “Where’s my own gear?” “You’ll have to request what you require from what we hold in custody.” Raelne nodded and wandered back out to the living area. Not much here except a few items of furniture—a couch, two armchairs, a small dining table. All somewhat worn, but comfortable looking enough. No sound equipment, and the bookshelves were bare. Books would be useless anyway until he learned the language. He walked through to the kitchen. The cupboards and small refrigerator had been stocked with staple items, and there was plenty of equipment of a fairly basic kind, though no doubt it was state of the art for Quarn. He could always cook to amuse himself, but he planned to spend most of his time working. He wasn’t here on vacation after all. He turned around to face Suaj, who stood in the doorway, apparently waiting for his reaction. “It’s fine. Please thank the commandant for this.” “You’ll wish to change clothes and shower. I’ll wait.” A not very subtle reference to the fact he stank in his prison gear. “Won’t be long.” A hot shower after weeks of cold ones—something that had become progressively more unpleasant as the weather grew colder—was wonderful, but his improved mood owed less to the water than to the realisation that he had a future. A real future, a real purpose, and at the end of that, a real chance to go home. All they had to do was fix the damage on the Opil caused by the self-destruct programme Marpe had instated, and surely that should be easy enough. With the three of them all working on the same project, he could see them being off this bloody planet by the spring. Now that was definitely a cheerier prospect than hanging—or life in solitary confinement. Even working with Mister Frosty and Unfriendly was worth that.
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Suaj rose from the armchair as Raelne returned, now dressed in clean fatigues and his prison beard trimmed with the thoughtfully provided blunt-nosed scissors. “Do you wish to eat?” “I’m fine. I’d like to see the facilities. I’m going to need some language instruction too.” “This has been arranged. A tutor will call here later. The commandant has ordered it as a priority for you.” “He’s efficient.” “Yes. Come with me.” The young soldier went with them again. Suaj explained that his presence was to assist Raelne more than to guard him, though he was definitely security. Raelne had only to ask for what he needed and it would be provided—but he had to learn Quarnian. He was making some progress with that. He had basic phrases down, and the structure of the language was much like Tusan—the two languages had the same Earth root, after all—so if he could build up his vocabulary, primitive communication should soon be possible. With any luck, he wouldn’t need more than that because he’d be on his way home. Though they took the automobile, the workshops were walking distance away, in what appeared to be a kind of hangar. The building was enormous, and surely some of it was from a former age, since he couldn’t see the present-day Quarnians building or even needing a facility big enough to take a spacecraft. Suaj’s workshop was large and open, but still only occupied a small portion of the huge main building. The workshop seemed to be multipurpose, with large lathes and presses to one end capable of producing quite substantial items. Raelne was pleased to see it was neat and organised, though the primitive level of tools and machinery made him despair a little. A number of grey overall-clad employees were hard at work on different tasks, and too busy to pay the stranger any attention. Suaj introduced him to three young people, a woman and two men, the technical assistants who would work full-time with Raelne until the data-reading project was
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complete. Then he took Raelne into his personal office. Again it was clean and orderly. Raelne highly approved of the man’s methodical approach. “You are familiar with optical data storage?” Suaj sat behind his tidy desk. He motioned Raelne to take a seat in front of it. “We use high-density optical disks for archival storage on Tuzax. We have a collection for non-mission-critical information on board—for entertainment, research, that kind of thing. The fastest way for this to happen would be to cannibalise our readers on the ship, reconfigure and adapt them. We could try to repair your existing readers but a lot depends on how badly they’ve deteriorated. We can pinch parts from ours if they’re basically sound.” “We haven’t succeeded in devising a method of moving the vessel closer to this base.” That fact seemed to irritate Suaj. Raelne kept his grin to himself. “Uh, no. Um, I think I can move it for you. There’s a lot of equipment on board we can use, and that you could have even when we leave. I don’t have a problem with sharing knowledge of that kind. It’s not like you guys are going to be space capable within a hundred years and by that time…” “Tuzax will be a dead colony.” Damn, the man was cold. “It’d be easier if the other two would help me but I can probably do it on my own.” “Then it will be arranged. Do you have the necessary tools for the reconfiguration?” “I think so, though I suspect I will have to have some made here. Tell me about power capacity.” It was the first chance he’d had to speak at length to Suaj as an engineer and not simply as a handy telepathic translating device. Raelne already knew the man was clever, but now he could appreciate how precise, how brilliant his mind was. The clarity of his thoughts, the clean way he argued his points…Suaj was a hell of a lot smarter than him, and that was a fact.
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The conversation wound down, as Raelne had to return to his house shortly for his private language lesson, but he did have one question for his host. “What rank do you have, exactly?” “I don’t. Like you, I’m a civilian contractor, but I live and work on the base. The military is the only organisation that can make full use of my particular skills. The soldiers give me the courtesies due a major.” “Then that’ll do for me. I like being saluted.” “Really.” “It was a joke, Suaj.” “Ah. I was deceived by the lack of actual humour.” “Would you recognise it if you saw it?” Suaj didn’t react to the sarcasm. “Undoubtedly. You must return to your quarters. If you don’t wish to cook for yourself, you may use the officers’ mess. Will you visit your colleagues tomorrow?” “Yes. I need their help for this.” “Then I’ll accompany you.” Raelne stood. “This must be a bit of a pain in the backside for you. You have a lot of work to do of your own, don’t you?” “If this project succeeds, you’ll save us hundreds of man-years. The state of my buttocks is of small importance.” Raelne blinked. Suaj had just made a joke. No one would ever guess from looking at him, though. Nuances, Raelne reminded himself. “See you in the morning then. Did you say you lived on base? In the officers’ quarters too? We’re neighbours, then.” “Possibly. I will collect you at eight. Please be on time.”
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Chapter Two
So Raelne made sure he was waiting on the little porch at exactly one minute to eight, and exactly one minute later, Suaj arrived in an automobile in front of the house. “Good morning, Major Suaj,” Raelne said in careful Quarnian. “Good morning, Major Kine,” Suaj replied in the same tone, but then said something else of which Raelne only caught the word for “rank”. “I said, civilians with a courtesy rank do not use military titles on the base. The soldiers don’t like it.” “Oh. Sorry. I was just practicing.” “Yes. Continue doing so, but we must leave.” Raelne couldn’t repress a shiver as he approached the grim, squat brig again. Things had dramatically improved in a single day but he was still a prisoner, and his new freedoms could be snatched away at a whim. As Suaj had so forcefully reminded him, he was not among friends here. They passed through the security checks and walked down a row of cell doors. “I’ll wait outside. However, I’ll monitor your conversation.” Raelne nodded and swallowed, his mouth suddenly dry. Suaj signalled to the guard and Raelne was admitted. Harnol leapt to his feet as Raelne came in. “Man, am I glad to see you!” Raelne shook his hand. “How are you, Harnol?” “Doing okay, but they’re not exactly gracious people, are they? Have a seat.” The only place to sit was on the bunk, so Raelne took one end. “You know why I’m here?” “Since you’re walking around in their uniform, I worked it out. You were quick enough to betray our people.”
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Raelne ignored the slight sneer in the man’s tone. “I don’t see it that way.” He didn’t like Harnol much, but since they and Fane were the only Tuzai on this planet, they had to stick together. “They’re not our enemy, and we’re not at war with them. We’re the ones in the wrong, and they could have killed us out of hand, like they did with Marpe and the others. They didn’t, and the offer’s fair. They just want access to their own data and they’ve agreed we can repair our ship and leave.” “And you believe they’ll stick to that agreement? We’re prizes for them. I can’t see them letting us go, just like that.” “They might not. But they can’t make any of us work for them if we don’t want to. The worst they can do is what they were planning to do. This way, there’s a chance we can go home.” Harnol rubbed his chin. “That’s fine for you, but I’d rather stay here than go home a failure. You know how much people were pinning their hopes on that Angel DNA. Tell you the truth, I’ve already decided to work for them.” Raelne frowned at the man in annoyance. “Then why in holy Zoka’s name are you— ” Harnol grinned. “Want to see what they’ll offer to keep me. No point giving in easy, Raelne. Looks like you missed a trick there.” “I’m happy to be out of a cell and not under a death sentence,” Raelne said stiffly. “Their offer was generous.” “Maybe, maybe not. But I want more than I had back home, and I intend to make sure they appreciate my talent.” Raelne thought about warning the man that Suaj was listening, but then realised none of this would surprise the telepath. “Fine. Just hurry up because I want to leave and the sooner they have access to their data, the sooner I can fix the ship and fly out. Do you know why Fane’s refused?” “Haven’t spoken to him, or seen him since the trial. You know what he’s like though.”
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“Yes. Honourable.” Harnol failed to notice the irony, which was just as well. “They’re offering good money, which means nothing. Rank, if you’re into that, housing, clothing, workshops, staff. What more do you want?” Harnol scratched his straggly beard. “I’ve got a list, man.” “Then give it to them. Next time I speak to you, it better not be in here.” “See, that’s where you and I are different, Raelne. I plan long. I’m patient.” “I’ve got better things to do with my time, actually.” Raelne stood. “We’ll need equipment from the ship. I’ve said I can move it closer to this base. I could do with your help, so get on with it, Harnol.” Harnol snapped off an ironic salute. “Yes, sir. Given you a rank yet?” “Major. Courtesy title only.” “You aim too low, man.” “Yeah, yeah,” Raelne said, uninterested in such status-building. Harnol waved at him as Raelne walked to the door. How had he forgotten what a pain in the arse the man could be sometimes? Suaj, leaning against the wall, made no comment on what he had to have overheard in the cell. “This way.” Fane wasn’t as cheerful as Harnol and not at all happy to see Raelne in his borrowed clothing. The man glared at him from the bunk. “Went over to the other side as soon as they let you, I see.” He didn’t ask him to sit. Raelne sighed. “Don’t be like this, Fane. There is no ‘other side’. We’re not in a war with these people.” “They’re not Tuzai.” “So? I told you already, I don’t divide people up that way. We committed a crime, and this is a reasonable way to make amends.” “I’m a soldier on a military operation, and you’re a contractor in uniform. We should be treated as POWs. Execution is honourable. Collaboration is not.” “Execution is dead, Fane, and I’m not that keen to die. I don’t want to spend the rest of my life in this damn brig either.”
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“So you’ll sell out to save your own skin. I thought you were better than that. Guess I was totally wrong about you.” “How long have you known me? Fane, you know I’m not like that. But I can’t see how giving them access to their own data will do us any harm. They won’t be spacecapable for a century or more.” Fane clenched his jaw. “And how do you propose to give them what they want? By giving them access to our data and equipment?” “I’m not going to give them any of our sensitive data. They just want to have what’s theirs to begin with. I won’t help them on weapons or anything that could be used to attack us.” “Damn it, Kine, don’t you see? You’re going to jumpstart their abilities, and then all they have to do is take the Opil and fly back to Tuzax.” Raelne shrugged. “Why would they? What do we have that they won’t have themselves soon enough? They can’t take the ship without our help and they can’t make us.” “Don’t have to make you, do they? What bait did you swallow? Pretty words? A pardon? Promise of fame and fortune?” “A pardon if I want to stay, which I don’t. The only thing they’ve offered is the chance to go home.” Fane jerked in surprise. “If we fix their data readers, we can repair the Opil. We can leave, Fane. We can go home.” His friend snorted in derision. “So you’ll give them a space-capable craft and you expect them to just let you leave? You’re a bloody fool. A naïve, dangerous fool. Have you forgotten Marpe already?” Raelne gritted his teeth. “They say they don’t know anything about it. I told them I distrusted them because of what happened to him.” Fane snorted again. “I’m sure they shook in their boots over that. I know you’ll ignore me, but for the record? I forbid you to cooperate with these people.” “To what purpose? To be stuck on this deity-forsaken planet in a prison cell for the rest of my life? Look—we failed. We can’t save our race. The Quarnians have beaten us
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on that. If we can’t help Tuzax, we can at least help these people. They’re not our enemy. We invaded them, remember? We should be dangling from a rope right now. You know they would be if the situation were reversed.” “It’s not, and if all you’re going to do is spout propaganda at me, then leave. I refuse to listen to a traitor.” Raelne bit back an angry retort. “I haven’t and I won’t do anything that will give them a weapon against our people, or help them to engage in any hostile act. I’ve made an honest deal, and nothing I’ve agreed to is a threat to Tuzax.” “You’re wrong. Just go.” “Fane, please…do you want anything? Paper, pens—” “Get out!” Fane rose from his bunk and advanced on Raelne. “Leave or I’ll punch you out as the dirty traitor you are!” So Raelne left. Outside in the corridor, he leaned against the wall, eyes closed, fist clenched and his gut churning. Harnol’s opinion hadn’t mattered, but Fane was a friend. A man he admired, a decent person and a fine pilot. He’d known him for near ten years, working on different projects. Though Raelne had been seconded on this mission under duress, Fane’s presence had been a saving grace, and a source of strength after they’d been captured. His scorn hurt, and there was no getting past that. “Mister Kine?” Raelne cleared his throat and opened his eyes. “Uh…give me a second.” He wiped his face and straightened up. “I don’t want him mistreated.” As always, Suaj’s reaction to the suggestion was almost impossible to read. “There would be no purpose in doing so. We can’t force cooperation, not in such a matter.” “No, you can’t. He does have a point. What if this is all a trick?” “Trust goes both ways. We’re giving you access to our most precious resources. You could damage them beyond all saving, out of spite.” “I wouldn’t! Not a national database!”
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“So you say. The commandant received word from the man who worked with the Angels to retrieve what you took from them. The man was present at the death of your Captain Marpe.” “And?” Raelne turned to face Suaj. “The details are not as you believe, but they may be distressing. Perhaps you’d prefer to hear them when you have calmed down.” “No, now.” Suaj signalled to their soldier guard to go on ahead. Raelne braced himself for bad news as Suaj began to walk slowly along the corridor to the exit, clearly expecting Raelne to accompany him. “There was no torture, though the Angels, against the wishes of the human observer, summarily executed both men. The damage to Captain Marpe’s face was postmortem.” “Why? Why mutilate a dead man?” Suaj coughed. “It seems the Angels were…preparing to butcher him for food. The human convinced them not to.” “Are you kidding me? Cannibalism?” Raelne covered his mouth, the revulsion rushing up like a wave. “And this is better than torture?” “Please keep your voice down, Mister Kine. I warned you this was distressing.” “Damn right it’s distressing.” He walked more quickly towards the exit. He had to get out of here, into the fresh air. He wanted to be sick. Out on the road, he heaved in lungfuls of cold air. Suaj, staying silent, kept his distance. Marpe had been…honest. Older, stern, brave. A man much like Raelne’s adored grandfather, in fact. He’d deserved a better fate. “Why?” he whispered. “The wild Angels don’t consider you full-bloods to be any kin of theirs. Since you stole their children without thought for the consequences, this isn’t surprising.” Raelne whirled. “You’re kin, though, aren’t you? What are you, a ‘domesticated’ Angel? Am I just an animal to you? Like some fucking rejer? Did they take your wings away to keep you grounded, Suaj? Don’t you want to be out there, hunting, like them? Killing like them?”
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“You’re the murderer, not me.” Suaj stalked off before Raelne could retaliate. His fists wanted to respond physically, and be damned to the fact he was a prisoner still. He bent over, sure he’d vomit. These people…those people…those Angels…were monsters. Fane was right. He was a traitor to his kind. He nearly belted the man who came and took his elbow. “Mister Kine?” the soldier said slowly, and something else which probably meant “come and sit” because he tugged Raelne over to a bench. Raelne tried to signal that he was fine and wanted to be left alone but the man refused to go away, so Raelne leaned back and covered his eyes. He heard footsteps, then Suaj’s cool tones in his mind. “You cannot stay here. You should return to your house.” Raelne didn’t even bother to look up. “Get away from me, Suaj. I won’t work with you. Put me back in your cells, or hang me. Cook and eat me if you must.” “I’ll have someone take you back to your quarters.” Suaj’s footsteps headed away from him on the gravel. Why did they have to tell him about Marpe? Why not just lie? Now he’d never get that image out of his head. “Mister Kine? Please come.” He stood and walked off, ignoring the soldiers who tried to take his arms and support him. He didn’t need their help. He needed to be off this planet. When he arrived at his house, he slammed the door behind him, then picked up the pad on which he’d made his language notes and hurled it against the wall. He wouldn’t learn their language. He wouldn’t work for them. They could all rot before he’d so much as lift a slide rule. Time ticked away, and no one came. No one arrested him or tried to talk him into or out of anything. Now the first shock of revulsion was past, he felt slightly foolish for being so dramatic, though his anger at Marpe’s treatment was as strong as ever. He hadn’t been very nice or fair to Suaj, though. Even if Suaj understood the Angels’
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behaviour, he’d not been party to it, and he was right. Raelne was a murderer, even if only by association. He stood and stretched. However appealing, he couldn’t really hide here forever. Either he walked over to the brig and insisted he be locked up, or he found a way to accommodate this unwelcome information and move on from it. He had to be honest with himself. Did he still believe his decision to cooperate was the right one? Well, yes, he did. Fane might be right and the Quarnians were going to pull a fast one, but in that case, they had Harnol now. All Raelne was doing was throwing away his only chance to go home. He washed his face and drank some water. His stomach still felt queasy. It would take a while for the images Suaj’s report had invoked to disappear. He pulled on a jacket and stepped outside onto the porch. The soldier on guard saluted him rather warily. “I wish to go to Mister Suaj,” Raelne said, paying attention to his Quarnian pronunciation. The soldier nodded, and said something which Raelne took for “I’ll take you to him.” They headed towards the workshop, which didn’t surprise Raelne. Of course Suaj wouldn’t allow something as trivial as Raelne’s meltdown to get in the way of his work. Suaj’s staff stopped work and stared when Raelne walked in. “Mister Suaj?” he asked into the sudden quiet. The female technical assistant pointed towards Suaj’s office, and spoke. She could have been telling him that Suaj didn’t want visitors, but Raelne could fairly claim ignorance in that case. He knocked on the office door. “Suaj, it’s me.” “Enter.” The man was at his desk and apparently unruffled by the morning’s events. “I, uh…want to apologise.” Suaj looked up. “Very well.”
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“Uh, it was a shock.” “Yes.” “I shouldn’t have called you a killer.” “No.” “You’re not making this easy for me, are you?” “Why should I? You have made your assessment of me, and I of you. My only question is whether you intend to stick to the agreement you made. If not, we shall make other arrangements. Mister Joese has indicated his willingness to assist.” “So you don’t need me.” Suaj stared unblinkingly, his thoughts maddeningly obscure. “Why don’t you just tell me what you want?” “I told you yesterday. My preferences are unimportant.” “That doesn’t mean you don’t have them.” “It doesn’t mean I wish to share them either. Especially not with someone so obsessed with my appearance.” Raelne bit his lip. “I’ve really offended you, haven’t I? I’m sorry.” Suaj made a note on the paper in front of him, not bothering to look at Raelne as he answered. “That of course, mends everything. You ask my preference, Mister Kine. My preference is that you go away. I consider you to be potentially more useful to the project than Mister Joese, but you disturb my concentration and demand more attention than I judge you deserve.” “All right.” Mortified, Raelne turned to go. He hadn’t faced this degree of contempt since junior school, and never with this much justification. “You understand that my preferences are unimportant.” “I won’t force you to work with someone you despise, Suaj. I’m sorry I’ve caused you so much aggravation. You better tell the commandant I’ve decided to renege.” “As you wish. You’re easily dissuaded from your course of action, aren’t you?” “Yeah. All it takes is someone trying to eat a good friend of mine and someone else hating my guts for it. See you around. Or not.”
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He walked out, back stiff, nodding politely to the assistants but not slowing down enough to allow them to talk to him. He ignored his guard on the way out, forcing the man to catch up with him. He didn’t know how to tell him that he was headed back to his quarters but he figured the man would work it out for himself. Back in the house, he threw himself down on the bed and tried very hard not to think about anything at all. He didn’t have much success, but eventually he fell asleep. “Mister Kine? Are you awake?” He struggled to open his eyes. The room was darker. Not quite night, but nearly. His body felt sluggish and heavy. He just wanted to go back to sleep but the annoying voice kept asking him to wake up. “What?” “Mister Kine, language lesson.” Crap. Hinet, his tutor was here. He sat up and rubbed his eyes, stared blearily at the polite young woman in the doorway. “Give me a minute.” She understood the tone if not the words and ducked out of the room. He swung his legs off the bed but he couldn’t really motivate himself to do more than that. What was the point of learning Quarnian now? When he didn’t emerge, Hinet popped back in. “No,” he told her in Quarnian. “Sorry. I cannot do.” She babbled at him but he cut her off with a slicing gesture. “I cannot do.” Eventually she gave up and he heard the front door open and close. He lay back on the bed with his arm over his eyes. He supposed the next visitor would be soldiers to come and take him away. He drowsed off again, and next time he woke, it was nighttime. “Ah, finally.” He sat bolt upright and peered into the darkness. “Fucking hell! Suaj? What are you doing in my bedroom?” “For the last half hour I’ve been trying to wake you. Are you unwell?”
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“What do you want?” He flailed around and found the lamp switch. Damn it, the man really was sitting on his bed, legs primly crossed and his expression unreadable. “You told me to go away. What are you doing here?” “Answer the question. Are you unwell? Do you need medical assistance?” “On this planet? No thanks. I’m not sick. I’m just…tired.” He resisted the ridiculous urge to pull the covers around himself to hide from his unwanted visitor. “What do you want?” “I prefer not to answer that. Ask me instead why I’m here.” Raelne glared. “I’m really, really not in the mood for games.” “Nor I. I’m here because I’ve been ordered to. Commandant Hedike insists that I find a way to work with you.” “There isn’t one. I’ll talk to him.” “Are you so sure?” “Suaj, I’m tired. I’m depressed. I’m homesick, I’m lonely. I miss my family, I miss my friends, and I hate this planet. Say what you’ve been ordered to say and then leave, will you? But one word of advice to you—next time you feel like cheering someone up by telling them a good friend has been cannibalised, don’t.” He narrowed his eyes. “You meant to hurt me, didn’t you. You take this business of the dead Angels personally. You’re not really one, are you?” Suaj glanced away. “I don’t have wings, so I can’t be.” “You were born with them, though. Someone decided to make you into a nice little human and cut them off, didn’t they? That’s why you depilate your hands and neck. Does it work? Do you fool people?” “I’m not an Angel. I’m a chimerical human, same as the other people around here.” “Only you’re not like them. You don’t believe it yourself. Tell me the truth. Are you an Angel or not?” “I have no wings.” “Your parents had them removed?” Suaj nodded in reply. “I’m sorry.”
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“It was long ago, and there’s no point in dwelling on it. It has nothing to do with you, certainly.” “No, but… We never meant to kill anyone, you know. The plan was to take the children back, harvest the cells and return them within half a year. Hard on their parents, but we thought the benefit outweighed the limited misery. The pulse pistols were set to low power, and since we knew about the Angels’ healing ability, we were sure they’d recover quickly. We only wanted to disable them for a very short time.” “They bled to death.” “I know. We didn’t realise.” Suaj’s thin lips curled in contempt. “You killed five fathers. You risked killing or damaging the children by destroying the mental bond. You had no idea what you were doing.” “No. Neither did your parents. Are they bad people, Suaj?” “Misguided. Not uniquely so.” “They didn’t mean to hurt you. We didn’t mean to hurt the Angels.” “You meant to hurt me though. You mocked and insulted me, quite aware of the impact you could have. I can forgive your actions towards the wild ones more easily than your deliberate viciousness. It shows a meanness of temperament.” “Yeah. I don’t have any excuses either. I just lost it.” Raelne rubbed his face, wishing his brain would work better. “Look—I’ve offered to go away, and yet you’re here. I’ve apologised, you’ve rejected it. I don’t have anything else to give you. All I’ve got is my engineering skills and you say you have Harnol on board. He’s good. He’ll make you a data reader, even if he screws you for everything he can get while he does it. I’m sure you don’t care about that.” “No, but I distrust a man so blatantly avaricious.” Raelne made a derisive noise. “Picky, aren’t you. I’m rude, he’s greedy… Fane’s a better man than either of us, which is why he won’t work with you. If I can swallow my pride and work for my captors, then maybe you have to do the same and work with your prisoner. If it helps, I can keep out of your way. I’ll do my work, never bother you. I’ll do
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my best to learn Quarnian so I don’t need your help. But that’s it, Suaj. Take it or leave it.” Suaj didn’t answer him, and didn’t look at him either. Raelne suddenly needed something to drink and saw no reason to be uncomfortable while his visitor thought things through. He wandered out to the kitchen and set the kettle to boil. One thing this place had plenty of was electricity. The wind generators stood in an enormous bank to the west of the base, dominating the landscape. They hadn’t figured out how to harness solar power. He could show them how if… He wanted to work on this project. He just didn’t want to work on it here. He was pretty damn picky too, he thought ruefully. His stomach growled. He hadn’t eaten since a small breakfast early that morning. Yesterday’s language lesson had centred on practical things like food. He fetched the list he’d thrown against the living room wall and took it into the kitchen to study it so he could identify the tins and jars in his store. Bread. Toast and honey. Sounded about right. Nothing with meat in it. Not yet, anyway. “Do you believe you can work with me and refrain from personal remarks?” Good job he hadn’t been holding anything hot, like a cup of tea. The man sure loved to catch him off guard. “I do. Believe it or not, this isn’t what I’m normally like. It’s not an easy situation for me.” “You brought it upon yourself. You can expect no sympathy from me. Especially me.” Raelne turned to look Suaj in the eye. “I guess not. But I can work with you, if you’ll allow it.” “Then I’ll report this to the commandant. Please present yourself to the workshop tomorrow at eight. Mister Joese will be there at that time. The first task will be the retrieval of your spacecraft.” “Understood.” Suaj nodded and walked out of the kitchen. Raelne stared into space and tried not to think of anything the other man could pick up.
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Suaj’s footsteps halted in the living room. “I didn’t mean to upset you this profoundly with the news about your friend. I tried to warn you. I thought if you knew he hadn’t suffered before he died, it would be of comfort.” “Normally it would be. You could have left off the rest.” Suaj reappeared in the kitchen doorway. “But that wouldn’t have been honest. We’re scientists. We must pursue and accept the truth, however unpalatable.” “Yeah, but today wasn’t a good day for it. I really do apologise for what I said. I just wanted to hurt someone—you—in revenge. Not very admirable.” “No. But I understand the impulse. We won’t speak of this again, Mister Kine. Tomorrow is a fresh start.” “Okay. Good night, Suaj.” Suaj bowed his head and left. Raelne leaned against the kitchen counter and sighed. He’d had better days, but then he’d had worse ones. Moving forward was all he could do.
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Chapter Three
He sat up late and made a list of words for which he would need a translation if he was to work on this project, although he suspected some of them didn’t have local equivalents. A few cups of tea, some carbohydrate, and time to think things through in a rational manner, left him calmer. His mind skittered away from the subject of Marpe every time he thought about Suaj’s news, so he left that alone. He could never tell Fane. He doubted the man would consider it an improvement over what he believed now. He slept dreamlessly in fits and starts, and by dawn, he was ready to be up and doing. He showered, dressed in fresh fatigues, and spent a little time doing minor household chores. By the time he’d eaten breakfast, he figured if he walked slowly to the workshop, he’d only be a little early. Better that than late, with someone like Suaj. Raelne hated to be tardy himself, and being kept waiting was one of his worst annoyances. There—something else in common with his boss-to-be. They were both engineers and both funny looking by the standards of this planet. Maybe that would be enough to make a working relationship. The guard on duty snapped to attention, and understood what he meant by “Mister Suaj”—“workshop” was a word Raelne urgently needed to learn. Units of measurement were another urgent requirement. His list of important words was currently ten pages long. As he walked in the chilly morning air, wondering if it would snow today, he saw a familiar figure emerging from a small house a few doors down from his own quarters. He raised an arm in greeting and Suaj politely waited for him to catch up. “Good morning, Mister Suaj.” “Good morning, Mister Kine.” He nodded towards the papers in Raelne’s hand. “I see you’ve started to make notes.” 32
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“A dictionary. If you don’t mind, I could pick your brain as we walk.” Suaj agreed so Raelne ran down his list. The measurements would be difficult to be absolutely sure of, but from the little Suaj could demonstrate, it seemed Quarn and Tuzax had retained Earth Standard, and their terms were similar enough to be easily remembered. Technical terminology had varied far less than domestic words, but that was probably because Quarn’s development had halted for so long. “I have another question. Why is the military in charge of this kind of thing? Back home, it’s government and business who drive development.” Suaj hesitated. “It’s largely historic. When our government realised how quickly we were losing access to data and knowledge, it handed over custodianship of what we had to the military, charging it to protect and nurture science wherever possible. With the closing of the spaceport, our army has no longer any substantial defensive role. It is far more ‘civil’ than I imagine that on Tuzax to be. In any event, our government is determined that no special interest group should have a higher claim to technology or resources than the general society. The military release information and inventions regularly to civilian designers and engineers such as myself. Development by amateur inventors is encouraged and rewarded. We have a very small, dispersed population. It makes it very difficult. Only the military has the organisation at present to build up momentum and carry forward projects that may take many years to benefit anyone.” “Some might say it was sinister to give control of such things to an organisation that has all the firepower.” “Some might. I do not. It works, however strange you find it. We do things our way on Quarn.” “So I see. We’re here. I can’t wait to get started.” “I’m pleased to see such enthusiasm.” Raelne couldn’t tell if the man was being sarcastic or not. Many of Suaj’s staff were already hard at work, but Harnol hadn’t arrived. Raelne was glad of that. He wanted to meet the assistants again and learn their names properly. He’d started on the wrong foot with all these people and if he ever wanted to go home, he
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had to make this work. “Good morning,” he said politely. “My name is Kine Raelne. Call me Raelne, Rael for short.” The three assistants looked at each other. Then the woman stepped forward. “Sernan qel Doli. Sernan,” she repeated carefully. The two men followed—the younger one was Herik, the other Maner. There was much nervous grinning as the introductions were complete and everyone realised that was pretty much the limit of the conversation. Suaj glanced at the analogue clock on the wall. Harnol was now officially late. “Since Mister Joese isn’t here yet, I can spare some time to show you around and give you the terminology.” Raelne was sure that Suaj was quietly irritated by Harnol’s tardiness and would, in normal circumstances, have resented wasting his time teaching a stranger basic Quarnian. But nothing showed on his angular features, and he gave every outward sign of polite enthusiasm for the task. The three assistants followed them around, which turned out to be fortunate because they picked up a little Tusan, enough so that Raelne would be able to ask them “What’s this called?” and “How do I use it?” without bothering Suaj every five minutes. The discussion became quite lively, the enthusiasm and curiosity of Suaj’s assistants infectious and enjoyable for Raelne after weeks of solitary confinement and boredom. Suaj even unbent so far as to make a joke after Maner diffidently corrected a point he’d made. Of course, this was his natural environment. If he didn’t feel at home here, he wouldn’t feel at home anywhere. Raelne was having so much fun that he was sorry to see Harnol stroll in just before nine, with his translator, Werse, behind him. Werse, though a telepath like Suaj, looked like the other Quarnians Raelne had seen about—nothing “Angelic” about him. As Suaj spotted Harnol, he closed up, the slight smile that had hovered on his lips for the last few minutes disappearing at once. “Nice of you to join us, Mister Joese.” “Oh, am I late? Sorry. I wanted to take a look around. Rael, I see you made it on time. Got to keep the boss sweet, right?”
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Raelne smiled stiffly and was very glad indeed none of the assistants spoke enough Tusan to pick that up. “We need to get on, Harnol.” “Yes. Werse, thank you for coming.” There was something about the slightly frosty way Suaj said that to his fellow Quarnian that made Raelne quite sure that Werse had received a telling off along with the “thanks”. “Gentlemen, my office.” Harnol was in ebullient mood, which made him more obnoxious than usual, but once they got down to the nitty-gritty of how they would approach the task, he took it seriously. If he hadn’t, Raelne wouldn’t have given much for the chances of Suaj not throwing him out of the workshop. “You don’t have time to develop the tools and methods you would need to build any of this from scratch,” Harnol told Suaj. “But there’s plenty of kit on the Opil you can cannibalise without affecting the flight operation.” Raelne tried not to wince at the word “cannibalise”. “We only have to adapt a single reader, if we can’t repair the old units you said are available. Shouldn’t be hard. We read the data, extract it to our computers and use our output devices to access it. The hard part is going to be decoding it. And that, my friends, is a job for Rael since he’s the programmer, not me.” He sat back, looking rather pleased at his summation. Raelne couldn’t find any flaw in it, however irritating Harnol was in his manner. “That could be the point on which this all fails, you realise,” Raelne said to Suaj. “I can assume that your programmers began from the same starting point as we did, but computer languages and formats evolve incredibly fast, and I have no idea what was used to store the data on the disks. If they used compression, and it’s not documented, then there’s nothing I can do. That’s beyond my abilities.” “There are paper documents in the national archives that may give you what you need. They’re in fragile condition, however.” “Image them,” Harnol said. “Don’t need to handle them.” “No, we don’t. The first thing we need to do is extract some data.” “The first thing we need to do is move your spacecraft. Mister Kine, you said this could be done quickly?”
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“Yes, I believe so. It would be easier with Fane’s help—” “Never going to happen,” Harnol said. “He’s dead against the whole idea. Forget about him.” Raelne’s jaw clenched with the effort of not snapping back at his colleague. He turned to Suaj instead. “I can make it work. I’ve done a few hours’ simulation on vessels of that class and I’m a qualified pilot.” “You are?” For the first time since Raelne had met him, Suaj showed open surprise, albeit briefly. “Then this is something we should begin upon immediately. Mister Joese, are you needed for this operation?” “Yeah. Don’t know what mess Fane made with his self-destruct.” “Then I’ll arrange a departure within two days. You two should assemble what equipment you need.” “How long will it take?” Raelne asked. “That transport we were hauled back in took forever.” “There is a train station one hundred and twenty quen from the spacecraft’s position. It will take three days to get there. Another two by overland transport to the spacecraft.” “What a country,” Harnol said, shaking his head. “You’d have thought someone would have put some priority on developing air travel, given the size of it.” “Indeed.” Suaj didn’t look at Harnol as he answered, his eyes glinting coldly as he stared at Raelne. Harnol slapped the desk and stood. “Right, then you don’t need me to hang around here. I can make notes and have them sent over for you to look at, Rael. Can’t imagine a workshop this primitive will have anything remotely useful.” Raelne sat up in surprise and stared at his older colleague. “Wait—you’re going? But don’t you want to see what capacity they have?” “You’re going to do that, aren’t you? Don’t need the two of us and after all that time in prison, I think I need a bit of time to clear my head.” He dropped a wink to Raelne. “I’m going back to my place. Send a message when you’re ready for me to leave on this
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expedition. Oh, and I’ll want better clothes than this. I’m not dressing up like a toy soldier.” “Your place? Aren’t you on the base?” “Nope. I took one look at those itty-bitty boxes and said I wanted a real house. They’ve fixed me up near town. Lovely place with a garden and everything. You should come visit. Or ask for one yourself.” “I’m fine where I am, thanks.” Raelne felt like apologising for his colleague’s greed, but it wasn’t like Suaj didn’t know about it. “Maybe you could drop in on Fane on your way out.” “He made it clear I wasn’t welcome. Let him stew for a bit. It’ll do him good. Are we done? Good. Talk to you in a couple of days, Rael.” He waved airily as he left, Werse trailing behind him, looking distinctly uncomfortable. Raelne cleared his throat. “Uh…” Suaj collected some papers from his desk and tapped them into alignment. No need to explain, Mister Kine. You’re not responsible for him and so long as he doesn’t hold up our work, he can do as he likes. “Yeah, but… There’s something I would like to request though.” “A bigger house? Better clothes? Gold-plated toilet paper?” Raelne coughed out a laugh at the joke. “No, I can manage just fine. It’s not for me, it’s for Fane. I want him given better conditions. His mental state is poor. He’s not in a position to think clearly and though it’s a long shot, he might change his mind if he’s treated well and has a chance to talk to some of you.” Suaj frowned a little. “He’s a criminal being punished. To soften his conditions unduly might be seen as a disincentive for him to cooperate.” “I know but…if I have to, I’ll make it a condition for my cooperation. I don’t want to do that though. Please, Suaj. It would ease my conscience a lot. You can still keep him under guard, but if he goes crazy, you’ll never get a damn thing from him.”
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“I’ll put your request to the commandant. Was there nothing you require for your own comfort?” “Just some children’s books to help build up my reading skills. Until I can read Quarnian, there’s not a lot I can do to work on those archived documents.” “It will be arranged, and your language lessons increased in duration, if you wish. Will you be leaving now?” “No. There’s still things to do, and I, uh, prefer to be in a workshop anyway.” “As do I. Then let’s continue the work we were doing before. I can leave you with my assistants while I make the arrangements we need.” “Thanks. You have flying machines, don’t you.” Suaj blinked. “How did you know?” Raelne smirked at guessing it right. “I know wounded pride when I see it. Why aren’t we flying inland?” “We have none suitable for mass transport. Were it just me, or two people, we could attempt it.” “Don’t want to be in a confined space with him, huh?” “I prefer to think of it as not placing both our valuable aliens at risk.” “Of course.” Raelne grinned and the corner of Suaj’s narrow mouth actually twitched a little. “Okay, let’s get moving.”
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Chapter Four
Two days later, in lightly falling snow, Raelne, Harnol and their Quarnian team joined a train at a military station outside Polsa. Raelne was looking forward to the trip, and not just because he welcomed being rejoined with his personal possessions on the ship and the technology onboard that would make their tasks so much easier. The military base was featureless and dull, and he wanted to see more of the landscape while he had the chance. He felt much less hostile towards Quarn now he knew he could leave it. Harnol estimated they could be gone in as little as six planetary months. He could be home in time for his mother’s next birthday. And to be truthful, he welcomed a chance to be away from Fane. The man was a source of guilt and worry that Raelne was powerless to change. Fane had been moved to vacant officers’ quarters not all that far from Raelne’s residence, and given a limited number of luxuries, though he wasn’t allowed to prepare his own food. He had a translator on hand, and Raelne had visited him twice, but Fane hadn’t appreciated any of it. He remained utterly convinced it was all a trick and that Raelne was nothing but a spy for the Quarnians. Both visits had ended with Fane yelling at him to leave. Raelne hoped that, with some time out of a cell and a chance to walk around outside and see real people, the man might unbend a little. He planned to bring back some items from the ship that might help. Suaj had tactfully not commented on his relationship with his colleagues in any way. Raelne would have liked to discuss it with a sympathetic person but though they worked together surprisingly amicably, he could never class Suaj as sympathetic. If Raelne’s Quarnian had been more fluent, he might have talked to one of the three assistants, all of whom were bright and friendly and enthusiastic, the kind of people he would have been
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delighted to have on his team back home. But for the moment, he still struggled to understand and make even basic requests. Suaj had taken note of this difficulty, it seemed, because as soon as they settled down in the lounge of their surprisingly well-appointed carriage—being attached to the military had its advantages—the man turned to Raelne and Harnol. “We must use this time to improve your language skills.” “Not for me,” Harnol said. “That’s what Werse’s for. I’ve got better things to do.” “Mister Joese, our deal was for you to cooperate fully on this project.” “And I am. But I’m not going to waste time learning a language I’ll never use again. Raelne’s into all that kind of thing. He can translate for me. I don’t have a head for it, or an interest, and you can’t make me. I know enough to do what I need to. Like it or lump it. I’m going to look over my bunk. Where do we eat?” “The instructions are all clearly written in your room. In Quarnian,” Suaj added sweetly. Raelne covered a laugh as Harnol scowled. “I guess that means I’ll need Werse’s help. Come on,” he said, hooking his finger at the young man. Werse had no choice but to obey. Sernan, Herik and Maner stared pointedly at their hands until Harnol and his hapless assistant left the lounge. They didn’t know what Harnol was saying but his attitude was clear enough. Raelne could have died from shame at Harnol’s shredding of the Tuzai reputation. “Uh. My apologies,” he said in Quarnian. “My friend is, uh…” “A fool,” Suaj said calmly. “I take it you have no problems with continuing our lessons.” “Hell no. I love this kind of thing, always have. I even took an elective course in Old Earth Languages at school. I found it fascinating the way they all connect up. I mean, take your words ‘quen’, ‘tarn’ and ‘xin’. When you say the Tusan equivalents, they sound different, but when you write them down, there are only a couple of characters separating them. It’s more accents than anything else, at least for some things.” He realised the four of them were staring at him. “Uh, it’s a bit of a hobby of mine.”
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“One that will make this task much easier,” Suaj said. “Shall we begin? I’m afraid the journey will be rather dull unless we occupy ourselves.” It could have been, but Suaj’s plan made the hours speed along. Suaj wasn’t chatty on his own, but with the company of the three young people, the conversation sizzled and made Raelne completely forget he was an alien, far from home, and a prisoner. It wasn’t long before he couldn’t even remember whether they’d talked about something in Tusan or Quarnian, and he was touched by how all of them, even Suaj, went out of their way to learn some phrases of his language. He only hoped they wouldn’t encourage Harnol’s stupidity by using them around him. He also enjoyed travelling in the old-fashioned train. The carriage the army had reserved for their exclusive use was luxurious, with elegant carpets and drapes, and polished wooden furniture and accessories that wouldn’t have looked out of place in a middle-class home. The engines had plenty of pull too, and the speed was sufficient to quell his impatience at the length of the journey. The lounge where they spent most of their time had excellent views of the countryside, and all in all, it was a far more pleasant way to spend his time than being in a prison cell. He wished Fane wasn’t so damn stubborn. He’d have loved this. Meals were brought through from another carriage, served by immaculately uniformed staff. The food was better than anything he’d eaten on the planet, though Harnol was disparaging and compared it unfavourably with the meals served in his own house. The man was milking the situation for all it was worth, and making sure Raelne knew it. If he thought it would make Raelne jealous, he was dead wrong. Raelne had never cared for ostentation of any kind, and since Harnol was only a middle-ranked engineer with no particular authority back home, he hoped the man wouldn’t become used to ordering people around in this fashion. Harnol would have his face smacked by the first Tuzai he spoke to in the manner he used with the Quarnians. After the evening meal and an hour’s conversation, Suaj announced he’d like to retire for the night. This presented the second awkward situation of the day. The plan had been for the two telepaths to share a cabin, Harnol and Raelne to share another. However,
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Harnol grandly announced that he wanted his translator close at hand so Raelne and Suaj could bunk up together instead. Suaj didn’t even bother looking at Harnol. “That’s not acceptable, Mister Joese.” “Too bad. Share with whoever you like. If I need something in the night, I’ll want Werse where I can find him.” “Harnol, give the man some time off. I’d murder you if I had to spend every hour of the day with you.” Raelne smiled to make it appear a joke but he was deadly serious. He was about a minute from punching Harnol in his smug face right now. “I don’t care who does the translating. Suaj can sleep with me if he wants.” Harnol smirked as Suaj’s mouth turned down. “Thought so. No, this is how it’ll be. I’ve already had your bags taken out, Suaj.” Raelne put his hand on Suaj’s arm as the man appeared ready to yell at Harnol—how angry he had to be to get to that point, Raelne didn’t like to speculate. “Is there a spare cabin? I don’t mind bunking on my own.” “No. Very well, Mister Joese. But do be aware you’re pushing the limits of my patience.” “I’m scared,” Harnol said, not sounding worried at all. “Come on, Werse.” Nobody said anything for several moments after the two of them left. Raelne bit his lip. “You’re going to pay that guy a bonus, right?” “There isn’t enough money in the world to compensate someone for this treatment.” “I’m sorry—” Suaj made an angry slicing motion. “The only thing more irritating than Joese’s behaviour is your constant apologising for it.” “I’m s…okay. I just want to say, for the record, we’re not all like that. Honestly.” “That’s self-evident, Mister Kine.” “Is there really nowhere else I could sleep?” “Not without inconveniencing even more people. Do you have an objection to my company?” “Of course not. I was just thinking you need a break from me. That’s all.”
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“I’m capable of judging my own limits. Allow me a few minutes to attend to my belongings and then you can come along at your leisure.” He stood. “Good night,” he said curtly to the four of them. After Suaj left, Raelne smiled queasily at his three remaining companions. “Is difficult sometimes.” Sernan gave Raelne an embarrassed grin of sympathy. “Yes,” Maner said gravely. “Some friends are.” “Good night. See you in the morning.” There was another smaller lounge near the rear of the carriage which also had clear views of the passing scenery. Though it was night, all three of the planet’s moons had risen and the effect of the moonlight on the fresh snow was rather pretty. It didn’t snow in Kosat, where he’d lived since he was five. It did sometimes up on his grandparents’ place. Damn, he missed them, and everyone else. He checked his watch. He’d given Suaj twenty minutes. Plenty of time. Sure enough, he found the man tucked in on the upper bunk, facing the wall. Raelne did his best not to disturb him. Whatever he claimed, Suaj definitely needed some time on his own, or at least with his own kind. Raelne could wring Harnol’s neck. He hadn’t been this annoying on the flight out, but then he hadn’t had the ability to get away with it. Hell, Raelne was already convicted of murder. They wouldn’t hold it against him if he killed Harnol for being a pain in the arse and an embarrassment to Tuzax, would they? Though the sleeping accommodation was as luxurious as the rest of the carriage, and the bunk’s mattress thick and of good quality, sleeping side-on to the direction of travel wasn’t comfortable, and it took him a good while to fall asleep. He woke with his heart pounding out of his chest. “What the hell was that?” What had woken him? A sound? The train jolted again and made an awful grinding noise. “Have we crashed?” The bunk light wouldn’t work. “Possibly. Get dressed.” “I can’t see.” “Wait.”
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He heard the man descend from the bunk with ease, as if the lights were on and he could see just fine. A click and snap, and then something landed on Raelne’s bunk. He was almost blinded as a bright light came on close to his face. “Sorry.” Suaj moved the portable lamp. “I believe we may have derailed. Get dressed.” “Really? Damn.” He set the lamp on the fold-down table. Suaj was already stripping down to his underwear. Raelne stared. The man was covered in— “Do you mind?” “Uh. Sorry. Uh…I need…” Suaj moved out of his way, clearly offended by his doltish behaviour. Raelne dressed as quickly as he could, very carefully not staring at the pure white fur covering Suaj’s body. Before they could leave the cabin, a knock came at their door. Suaj answered and spoke to someone outside the room. Raelne waited. They probably weren’t in any imminent danger. There wasn’t enough shouting. Suaj stepped back inside and closed the door. “The train struck an object on the track. We haven’t derailed but there’ll be some delay while they clear it. Most likely it was a group of rejers. It’s a common hazard. You may as well go back to sleep.” “Right. Um, I’m sorry for staring before…” “You’re not the first to do so, Mister Kine.” The lights came on then, and Raelne could now see Suaj’s expression more clearly. He’d expected anger, but it was more…sadness. Perhaps resignation. “People think you’re a freak, don’t they?” “People are stupid, as you have seen ample evidence of today.” “I don’t think it’s ugly. It’s, um…beautiful. You shouldn’t need to hide it.” “Human fascination with my appearance is a distraction that I don’t want or need. I warned you about personal remarks.” “Yes, you did. I apologise. I’ll, uh, turn away.”
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“To what point? You’ve seen. Look to your heart’s content.” Raelne flushed at the raw scorn in Suaj’s normally expressionless tone. “I’ve seen enough. I’ll use the bathroom, since I’m awake. Excuse me.” He bolted out of the room and to the bathroom up the corridor. Idiot, idiot, idiot. He knew how sensitive Suaj was to people drawing attention to his differences, yet Raelne had made Harnol look like the diplomat on the team. Suaj was so beautiful though. He washed his face, used the toilet, dallied as long as he could. Suaj had left the lower bunk light on for him, and though he was facing away from Raelne, the stiffness of his back told him his companion wasn’t asleep. “Please, Suaj. I need you to forgive me. I’m so sorry. It was ignorant and rude—” “To admire me? To desire me?” Raelne flushed hot. “I didn’t say I—” “I said, you’re not the first. There’s nothing to forgive.” “Then why are you angry?” “I’m not. I… You’re correct. I perhaps need a break. This translation is very tiring for me.” “What can I do to make it easier? If you’d like me to work with someone else— Werse, maybe?” “And take on your Mister Joese? I don’t think so, Mister Kine.” “Damn it, my name’s Raelne. Everyone calls you by your given name. I’m not your enemy. You turn every conversation into a battle. I just want to…to…to be a friend, damn you!” “This is how you convince me?” Raelne gritted his teeth. “No. I can’t drop my mental shield, but if I could, you’d see I bear you no ill will. I like you. I admire your ability and your patience. I’m very grateful for your tolerating Harnol and me, and the way you’ve tried to ease my way. Right from the start, I felt you’ve done your best and since you hate me so much, that makes it even more admirable.”
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Suaj said nothing. Raelne felt like a prize fool. “I’m sorry.” Suaj rolled over, and gave Raelne the full force of his extraordinary eyes. “Mister Kine…Raelne. I appreciate your admiration. However, you’re overlooking the fact that this…intimacy is artificial. We’ve been thrown together by circumstance, and because your range of contacts is necessarily limited, you’re trying to convince yourself that this means we should be friends. Much as Mister Joese is determined to ignore the fact that Werse loathes him.” “Do you loathe me? You said you did.” “My feelings are immaterial. What I’m trying to point out is that I’m unsuitable for the role into which you’ve cast me. I don’t make friends easily, nor wish to. I’m not someone who wishes confidences, or gives them. My patience with you is something that has been ordered. It doesn’t come naturally.” “I see. I’m making an idiot of myself. Thank you for being honest. I won’t impose on your kindness any more.” “For what it’s worth, you aren’t as much of a trial as your colleague would be.” Raelne laughed dryly. “Why does that not thrill me as much as it might? You’re right. I just want not to be the stranger.” “Unavoidable, I’m afraid. You aren’t here by choice, and you weren’t invited. Go to sleep.” “And we won’t talk about this again either.” “No. Good night.” Bugger. Six months until he could get out of this situation. Longer if he didn’t manage to avoid strangling Harnol, or being thrown off the project by an enraged Suaj. If he could survive this train journey, he’d be doing extremely well.
True to his word, Suaj didn’t mention the events of that night at all, or even hint at them. The only change in his behaviour was that he began to call Raelne by his given name—unless Harnol was around. The change didn’t bring pleasure so much as intense guilt, and Raelne had to wonder if Suaj had adopted the practice for that reason. But he
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didn’t have any sense of ill will from the man. He could have been much crueller in the manner in which he’d forced Raelne to stay outside his comfort zone. Raelne felt—and perhaps projected too much again, he thought wryly—that Suaj was doing his best to be fair to someone he had absolutely no reason to like. Raelne appreciated that. The blocked track only delayed their journey by a couple of hours or so. No one seemed bothered. Such delays were common and while Suaj insisted on punctuality in the workshop, the general attitude to such matters was that things would happen when they happened. Adjusting to the slower pace of life here wasn’t easy for Raelne, though Harnol had taken to it right away. Harnol had adapted surprisingly fast to most things, in fact. He wasn’t in any hurry to leave, he freely admitted. Ironic when the Quarnians were increasingly eager for him to do so—or at least their small team of Quarnians was. After three days of travel, they left the train at a place called Lornes too late in the day to be taken to the Opil, and were billeted in a small boarding house for the night. Lornes was a fair-sized town by this planet’s standards, but that still meant there were fewer than two thousand people living here. Most of them didn’t even live in the town itself, which was apparently little more than the hotel, a general store and some ramshackle buildings of undetermined use. Their arrival attracted some attention from those who did live in the town, and not all of it friendly. After the seclusion of the army base and the train, Raelne was once again the subject of curious and hostile stares, and he now knew more than enough Quarnian to work out the muttered insults from the staff in the boarding house who served their supper and took them to their rooms. He deserved it, he knew. Harnol, however, was indignant at the disdain, and while the two of them used the communal bathroom, he took the opportunity to vent his feelings as he combed what was left of his hair in front of the mirror. “We’re about to lift them out of the Stone Age and they’re carrying on as if I’m not fit to lick their shoes. Ungrateful bastards.” Raelne started to unbutton his shirt. “Harnol, people died because of us.” “One person. The rest were those freaks with wings.”
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“Who happen to be considered relatives of the human population, and held in high regard. Watch your mouth, will you?” “Why? Who are you afraid of offending? Them? They hate us. They won’t hate us worse because of anything I say.” One tiny extra murder. Really. No one would notice. “We have to work with these people. It’s common courtesy not to dish out insults with every breath.” “Considering the way we were treated this evening, I think you should be lecturing the natives, not me,” Harnol said with a sniff. He picked up his bathrobe and put it on. “And you can tell that friend of yours to knock off the green-eyed glares too.” “He’s not a friend and considering some of the things you’ve been doing, you’re lucky glaring’s all he does. Harnol, you’re making us look like pigs.” His colleague grinned. “Yeah. And yet they let me get away with it. Consider it revenge for the people we lost, Raelne. Or have you forgotten them already?” He hadn’t, and in fact their three dead colleagues had been preying on his mind of late. But he didn’t want to talk to Harnol about that. “Just cool it a little, that’s all I’m asking. It’s embarrassing.” “Grow some stones. Shove back. And you’re not the boss of me. I’ve got seniority over you, remember?” Raelne pulled a face and went off to shower. Harnol his boss? That’d be the day. He made his way to his room, but was somewhat surprised to find when he got there, that he was still sharing with Suaj. “Did they not have enough rooms?” Suaj was laying out his pyjamas on the bed. “No. They’re having to put themselves out considerably to allow you and Joese separate accommodation. I could have had the four of us sharing but…” “Thanks.” He’d had his fill of Harnol’s deliberate provocations, and Suaj was surely ready to boil over too. “With the bathroom so close, I couldn’t help but overhear your conversation.” “Sorry…er…I mean, yeah.” Being a telepath had to be a nightmare sometimes. “I hoped you might make him see reason.”
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“Afraid not. Can we not talk about him?” “Certainly.” Suaj stripped off his shirt and Raelne hastily looked away. “Would you like me to step out?” “I’d have asked you to if I’d wanted that. I…am trying to be less defensive on that score.” Still bare-chested, he walked over to the little washbasin and ran a cloth under the tap. “Although it would help if you didn’t drill a hole in the back of my head with your staring.” “I can’t help it. It’s so…damn it, Suaj, you shouldn’t have to hide what you are.” Without his shirt, it was possible to see the small bumps under the shoulder blades, the atrophied wing supports now largely disguised by the lush, silvery fur. “How old were you when they…you know?” “Under a year. It’s when it’s usually done. I’ve been assured I could never have used them to fly.” “Don’t believe that?” Suaj stood straight and stared into the mirror in front of him as he answered. “Not knowing is…painful. I’ve spoken to others like me and we all feel the same way. We know they’re missing even though we can’t remember having them.” Must be a bit like phantom pain for an amputee, Raelne thought. “How many of you are there? And are you all telepaths?” “Under a dozen. It’s always been a very rare occurrence. All of us are telepaths, but there are more telepaths than have this morph. It would be a fascinating area for research but as you know, we lack the capability.” “The wing removal is purely cosmetic?” “The rationale is that they’re rudimentary and useless, prone to being injured in childish accidents, and likely to be a source of nothing but curiosity and mockery in the adult. Everyone means so well.”
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“But no one listens to you when you explain how you feel. You said I wasn’t the first to be fascinated by it.” Suaj turned, still wiping his face. He brushed the cloth over his chest and down his arms. Raelne wished he could touch the fur, just to know what it felt like. No wonder Suaj was annoyed by people’s reactions. “Humans have long had a fetish for Angels. I satisfy their curiosity to a certain extent. In my youth, I occasionally exploited that purely for selfish reasons, but the encounters were demeaning for both sides. I prefer not to indulge that curiosity any more.” “Don’t blame you.” Half naked, Suaj looked…right. The unnaturally formal clothing he habitually wore didn’t suit his attenuated frame. The fur did. “You should make people accept you as you are. You’re not a freak.” “Technically, I am. A sport, actually.” “You know what I mean, damn it. Harnol intends it to be an insult. He’s an idiot.” “Unfortunately true, at least as far as social interactions are concerned. Aren’t you going to get undressed and go to bed?” “Yeah.” Raelne slipped the bathrobe off. It occurred to him that it might be polite to reciprocate Suaj’s frankness. “Do you want to see what I look like?” Suaj actually smiled. “Thank you but no. Your skin is…rather off-putting. So lacking in tone.” “Oh.” Raelne could have been offended by that, if he was inclined. “So I’m ugly to your eyes?” “Yes. But so are most humans. I’m picky, as you noted once before.” “Your ideal partner would be another of your kind?” “Most likely. Or a full-blooded Angel. I’ve never seen one in the flesh since the noninterference regulations are quite strict, but… When I look at pictures, I feel drawn to them.” “They’re beautiful. Scary though. Sharp teeth.” “Obligate carnivores. Remarkable creatures.”
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“Maybe we’ll see some on this trip.” “Perhaps. Good night.” That had been a very odd conversation, Raelne considered as he lay in the darkness, trying to go to sleep in yet another unfamiliar bed. Why had Suaj opened up so much? Just to tell Raelne how little he liked his appearance? It seemed to have been more than that. Maybe it was just a reaction to Harnol’s idiocy. He sighed and rolled onto his side. He was definitely ready for this trip to be over and done with.
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Chapter Five
Their transport out to the Opil was a rejer-drawn, canvas-covered vehicle that had seen better days. Raelne walked around it. “Are you sure this thing can carry us that far without falling apart?” One of the rejers decided to relieve itself as he passed. He jumped back to avoid the stream and Harnol, standing out of harm’s way, snickered. “This type of carriage is common for intersettlement transportation, Rael. They’re quite sturdy.” “Huh. No padding on the seats, and no heating. This’ll be such fun.” They travelled all day, stopping only twice to allow the passengers to “pick flowers” and to stretch their legs. The campsite for the night was in the middle of nowhere and with nothing to recommend it, but after ten hours on poor springs over dirt roads, Raelne was more than ready to get off the cursed vehicle. “I thought you said the army camped out here,” he said to Suaj through gritted teeth as he rubbed his abused arse and wondered if his kidneys would ever recover. “Don’t they have any automobiles?” “No gas supply out here. The rejers fuel themselves. Did you find it uncomfortable?” Raelne growled at the man and went off to stretch his legs. How Suaj could endure a ride like that on his skinny backside, he had no idea. All the Quarnians had taken the travel in their stride. The only satisfaction was that Harnol had suffered even more than Raelne had and Werse was taking an obvious delight in being unable to offer anything to make his bruises hurt less. The camping was unpleasant too. Though it was too dry to snow, the temperatures had dropped considerably as they travelled inland. He and Harnol had been issued the best winter gear the army could supply, and the tent all of them shared was large and
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insulated, but Raelne found it impossible to stay warm. He shivered all night in his sleeping bag and snapped at Suaj when he asked how he’d slept. The man seemed genuinely surprised that Raelne had suffered. “I’m not used to this kind of weather,” Raelne said crankily. “Tuzax is a warmer planet.” “Ah. I’ll remember that. Arrangements will be made to accommodate your less resilient nature.” Raelne pulled a face and thought something rude. But Suaj was as good as his word. He arranged for better cushioning in the covered cart and provided extra blankets to wrap around the Tuzai passengers. Though it was undoubtedly only to keep a valuable resource in good health, Raelne still appreciated it, even if Harnol continued to bitch. But all discomfort was forgotten as the Opil came into view midafternoon, rising majestically against the horizon. Suaj gazed at the spacecraft with exactly the same expression Raelne’s older brother had when he’d held his daughter for the first time. “She’s beautiful, isn’t she?” “Yes. ‘She’?” “Er. It’s just tradition. Wait until you see inside.” It still took them an hour to reach the ship, passing through at least three security checkpoints on the way. Suaj stared at the ship the entire time, lost in admiration. Raelne had felt the same way over twenty years ago when he’d visited the Kosat spaceport at the age of eleven. He knew then he wanted to fly, and work with machines that would take him into the skies, even into space. It was nearly dark before they pulled up at the base of the ship, but Suaj insisted on going inside. Harnol punched in the security codes and led the way in. As Suaj emerged from the stairs into the cargo hold, he made an exclamation that Raelne didn’t need translated because he recognised pure astonishment when he heard it. I had no idea. “I saw the first of her class being unveiled when I was a kid. Looks like she might be the last of it, if we can’t find a way to keep our population levels up.” “Shame you chose to take, and not ask.”
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“Rael,” Harnol interrupted. “I’m going to check on the flight computer. Fane never told you what Marpe set up with the self-destruct?” “Couldn’t get him to talk, no. You handle that, I’ll show Suaj and the others our data-reading systems.” Ignoring Suaj’s little jab, Raelne led them up to the comms room, and gave them a quick rundown on how the process worked, showed them the data screens and the printer, while Suaj stroked the metal cases with adoration in his eyes. Suaj might not like the Tuzai but he sure loved their machines. “Excuse me, Rael,” Sernan asked in slow Tusan. “If ship damaged, it fly how?” “Auxiliary systems.” Too much for her vocabulary so he looked to Suaj to translate. “Terrestrial transport control is deliberately kept segregated from the main navigation for just this kind of situation, in case we have to move the ship to a maintenance hangar and so on. I’ll wait until Harnol reports, but I don’t think the self-destruct would have affected those secondary controls. There would be no point.” “If we could replicate even those, our society would be transformed.” “You’ll have to develop the capacity to create and maintain fusion engines. Old Earth relied heavily on fossil fuels but Tuzax didn’t have that option and neither do you. Your hydrogen generation will give you the capacity to reach escape velocity, but longrange travel won’t be possible without a more compact, longer-lasting fuel source. There are a lot of skills you would need to develop. It’s going to be a long time before you can build something like this. But you don’t need to. You’re self-sustaining now. We would be too if our population wasn’t crashing.” “You could have asked us for help. There were other ways of obtaining what you wanted.” Raelne sighed. “All our government had to go by was the edict banning chimerical research on humanoids, Suaj. You guys have been out of contact nearly three hundred years. We couldn’t risk you stopping us.” “But we did.”
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He winced. “Yeah, I know. Do we have to go over this again? I’m trying to stay positive and help you.” Suaj bowed a little. “Indeed. My apologies. So, can you extract this equipment and run it from our power supply or would you have to remain connected—” “Rael? I think getting home might take a little longer than we thought.” Everyone turned to look at Harnol in the doorway. His expression was bleak. “Give me the bad news first.” Harnol grimaced. “Flight computer’s fried, data’s wiped, and the worst of it is that the astrogation has been reset. I can rebuild the computer eventually but there’s a lot of physical damage and some of that equipment hasn’t got any redundancy built into it.” Bugger. “The Quarnians may have records available still which we can use to fix our position and set the astrogation. If we can do that and rig up an alternative flight computer…” “Maybe.” Harnol shrugged. “The auxiliary system’s fine, which is something.” “Gentlemen, the priority is the data access, as we agreed. The problem of making this vessel space-worthy is not to be dealt with until we have completed the other project.” “I know that,” Raelne snapped. “Do you mind if I find out whether I’m going to be trapped on this dust ball for the rest of my life or not?” Suaj stared at him coldly for a few seconds, then turned to Harnol. “Mister Joese, you can use the time between now and our arrival at the Polsa base to make your assessments, but after that, it will need to be set aside. Mister Kine, you must concentrate on the equipment extraction and reconnection. I sympathise with your concerns, but a deal’s a deal.” Harnol nodded. “Give me a couple of hours this evening. When do you want to move her out?” “Tomorrow morning.” “Ah,” Raelne said, “I was hoping we could visit my colleagues’ graves before we left.”
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“Is there some religious ceremony that needs to be performed?” “No. I’d just like to know they’d been decently interred.” “Commandant Hedike has assured me that all three men were buried with all due respect. I can’t really permit an excursion at this time. I hope you understand.” Raelne hadn’t really expected Suaj to agree but at least the man wasn’t being nasty about it. “Yeah. I’d like to visit them at some point, though.” “I’ll try to arrange that at a later time. Now, you may sleep on board, if you’d find that more comfortable. We shall do the same in that case.” Harnol agreed that was the best idea and left them to it. Raelne concentrated on making notes and ignoring Suaj. After a few moments, Sernan and the other two assistants left the room. “Hey, be careful and don’t touch anything!” he yelled at their backs. “I asked them to leave to give you a moment to regain your composure, Raelne.” He turned to Suaj and glared. “Do you have to keep poking me about everything? It’s not like I’m likely to forget my position, is it. Not with you reminding me every five minutes, and telling me how alien and ugly and stupid we all are. Well, I might be, but my people built this ship and you need it, and you need my damn brain.” He worked his jaw and tried to rein in his temper. What if Harnol couldn’t set the astrogation? Without that, they could launch the Opil and drift for a thousand years. Damn Marpe and his bloody self-destruct. And damn Fane for activating it. “Are you done?” “Yeah. Are you?” “I think so. You must stop blaming us for your situation.” “Stop reminding me of it, Suaj.” “Very well. I…am sorry you’re disappointed.” “Not your fault. The astrogation is more than I was expecting, that’s all. Navigating through hyperspace isn’t something you can do by eye. This class of vessel has a very sophisticated system, and neither of us are experts on it. The men who were, are dead. Fane might be some use but he’s not interested as yet.”
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“That may change. We’ll give you what assistance we can, once we have our data.” “Thanks, but I think you guys are just a little way behind what we need. Okay. Let’s get on. These are our storage disks…” They worked until nearly midnight, breaking only to eat and to bring their gear on board. Raelne had never actually flown a vessel of this size but there was so much automation, he could more or less just point her nose in the right direction and tell her when to set down. Their dead colleagues’ cabins were cleared, and their personal possessions set aside to be returned to their families. Raelne made sure all Fane’s stuff was kept separate—he hoped it might cheer the man up to receive it. Then the four Quarnians took over the cabins. At least, the assistants did. Suaj couldn’t make himself stop playing with Marpe’s portable computer. “I’ve heard of such things. I never thought I would hold one, or use one. This alone will speed up my work so much.” “Treat them like they’re made of glass, okay? Because until you guys have your industries up to speed, there are no spare parts. You can only rebuild from others for so long.” “I know. But to have access even for a year or two.” His expression was more animated than Raelne had yet seen. “I so wish I could visit your society, learn more.” “You could. There’s no reason you couldn’t fly back with us.” “Except for them seeing me as an experimental subject and locking me in a cage.” Raelne pulled a face. “We wouldn’t. Your DNA wouldn’t be any use anyway.” “It’s not a risk I’d like to take. But I’d love to see it.” “If I make it back, I could talk to my government. If we can’t save our society, maybe we could throw our efforts into saving yours.” “A worthy goal.” Suaj yawned, exposing perfect white—and rather pointed—teeth. “I should go to bed.” “At least you have your own room tonight.” “Yes. Luxury. Good night.”
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Raelne didn’t feel sleepy, although he was tired. He decided to set some data dumps going onto the portable computers. He’d have reading material again, at least. While he waited, he thought about the idea Suaj had set in his head, about taking the man back to Tuzax. He was almost uniquely capable of exploiting such an opportunity. It seemed a crime not to give him the chance, but he did have a point. People were desperate for Angel DNA and if they couldn’t obtain it in its optimal form, they might decide to take what they could get. This was assuming anyone could get back to Tuzax at all. The astrogation was like their ball of string, leading the way back home, and Marpe’s paranoia had severed it. If the Quarnians didn’t have accurate star maps, Raelne and his colleagues were lost. He tried not to think about it. They were a long way from having to admit failure. In the morning, he amazed the Quarnians all over again, and he had to admit, he’d been looking forward to this moment. He put Suaj in the copilot seat and the others in the observation area. The roar of the conventional engines sent the soldiers on the ground running for their lives even though they were well out of danger, while on board, the Quarnians clung to the arms of their seats, their mouths open in alarm. Only Suaj was calm, grinning from ear to ear as Raelne lifted off. Raelne grinned too, at the sheer joy on his companion’s face. “Maybe you could have a go one day?” “I don’t even dare to hope. But could I?” “Don’t see why not. Okay, folks, next stop, Polsa.” A three-day journey by train, was a mere three hours by spaceship. His Quarnian passengers were glued to the windows the whole time—even Suaj, though Raelne’s flying and the controls equally fascinated him. “So smooth,” he murmured appreciatively. “You fly like this all the time on Tuzax?” “Yeah. I’ll never take it for granted again, I’m telling you.” “I can’t imagine how anyone could.” “You’d be amazed what you can get used to, Suaj. Don’t forget, hot and cold running water is a fairly new reinvention in your society.”
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“True. But this…this is…” He closed his eyes and for a few brief moments, seemed completely at peace. It startled Raelne to realise that. He’d always thought Suaj was a calm person, but seeing his face relax, Raelne knew that what he’d taken for calm, was in fact tightly reined-in stress. And why wouldn’t he be under stress, with the job he lived and the isolated life he’d chosen? Raelne could grow used to seeing Suaj looking happy though. It was nice. He brought the Opil into land about a half quen from the base, and even before he touched down, soldiers had begun to boil towards them on foot and in automobiles. Suaj unbuckled his safety harness. “I’d best speak to them before they start firing at us in panic.” “Are you sure they won’t shoot you?” “Almost sure.” Then he smiled. Suaj was in a very good mood, at least for now. They couldn’t leave the ship for nearly an hour until security was set up to the army’s satisfaction, and only after Raelne had been asked to move it to a closer and more easily defended position. Once they had arranged things the way the military wanted it, then they could start removing equipment. Everything had to be catalogued and packed with care. They would leave most of the fixed equipment in situ until the power-supply situation was sorted out, but the portable computers, radios and other items were easily removed. Everything was treated with the kind of reverence Raelne had only ever seen in temples. Harnol lost patience very early on, and went back to trying to discover the full extent of the damage they would need to repair before they could go home. Suaj was too thrilled with his new acquisitions to tell Harnol off. A whole new workshop had been set up next to Suaj’s existing one, and would be dedicated entirely to the data-access project. Raelne and Harnol had their own offices, and a permanent guard was mounted. No one would be allowed in or out without permission, and everyone would be searched before leaving. The Quarnians didn’t want to lose a single screw from their precious hoard. It took until sunset before all the equipment had been transferred and placed in position. Suaj was eager to get on, but Raelne was bushed, and Harnol declared that he
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wasn’t going to do another damn thing before eight the next morning. He swept off, Werse in tow, ignoring Suaj’s irritated frown. Raelne turned to Suaj. “If you really want to keep going, I will, but I was hoping to drop in on Fane. I can do that tomorrow if you prefer…” Suaj made an impatient gesture. “No. Visit your friend and enjoy your rest. We have years’, decades’ worth of knowledge in front of us. A few hours won’t make any difference.” “I could—” “Go,” Suaj said in Tusan. “Thank you.” “You’re welcome,” Raelne replied in Quarnian. “See you in the morning.” He wouldn’t mind betting Suaj would be out of his front door at dawn, raring to go. It was now dark and the base street lighting was fairly inadequate, but he could see well enough to walk back to the officers’ quarters along the icy paths, swept clean of snow but still treacherous. Fane should be eating his supper. Raelne had hoped, with the man being so close by, they could eat their evening meals together, but Fane hadn’t been receptive to any overtures as yet. Maybe the few days they’d been away would have made him more welcoming. The guards searched him before he could enter the house, and carefully examined the pack of personal items he carried. “Suaj gave permission,” he told them repeatedly, having made sure the phrase was perfectly memorised. Finally he was allowed inside. Fane had just finished his meal, it seemed, although he’d left almost half on the tray. The room was warm enough, Raelne was pleased to note. Suaj’s workshop was bit on the cold side for his liking, clearly a preference of the Quarnians. The resident here was still in combative mood. “What do you want?” “Nice to see you too, Fane. Brought you your stuff from the ship.” Raelne dumped the pack on the table. Fane made no move towards it. “So you went ahead with your traitor’s scheme.”
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“Oh give over, will you? Yes, we brought her here. You and Marpe left the flight systems in a hell of a mess, though.” “Good. Hope you can’t ever fix them.” Raelne rolled his eyes. “Lovely. Your shaver’s in there. You should use it—you look like a wild animal.” “To impress who, Kine? You? That other traitor, Joese? At least he’s got the sense to keep away from me.” “Are you going to keep this up? We’ll be here at least six months, you know. And once we fix the ship, which we will, I’ll take you back with us, even if I have to drag you kicking and screaming.” “Oh, I’ll go back if you fix her. I want to testify at your treason trial.” “Fine,” Raelne said with a sigh. “I don’t think I can extract a portable computer for you—they want all we have—but there are a couple of books in there—” “Knock it off, Kine,” Fane snarled, slamming his fist on the table. “Nothing you do is going to convince me you’re anything but a dirty traitor.” “Okay. But nothing you say is going to stop me coming over here every damn day to make sure you’re fit and well. You want to be an arsehole, you go right ahead. You’re wrong about me and Harnol, and I’ll prove it.” “Leave before I throw you out.” “I’m going. Shave, will you? You’re a disgrace to Tuzax.” Then he left before he got a tray of mashed vegetables thrown at him.
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Chapter Six
The next morning was the start of an intensely busy—but also intensely productive—period. Five more engineering assistants were drafted in to help Suaj begin to replicate the necessary components to build the most essential equipment. Harnol and Raelne focused on using parts of the ship’s data readers to repair the best preserved of the ancient optical devices from what the Quarnians called the “Age of Technology”. Failing that, they hoped to use the old reader to help modify their modern equipment to work with the different data storage used by the Quarnians. Suaj would eventually have to deal with the power requirements of the Tuzai equipment, but for now the data reader and screens could be hooked up to a portable generation unit from the ship. Two assistants worked on translating into Tusan what documentation on the storage and readers Suaj had been able to locate. Everything else was set aside, even language lessons, though Raelne did what he could while working, constantly using his three assistants to help him increase his vocabulary, improve his usage and perfect his accent. The only part of his routine he refused to alter was his evening visits to Fane. He had to give the old guy credit—when he put his mind to being a bastard, nothing could budge him. The one thing that gave Raelne some hope he might change the man’s attitude eventually was that Fane hadn’t at any point outright forbidden him to return. So for now, Raelne worked his arse off for the Quarnians during the day, and last thing he did before heading back to his house was to turn up and be soundly told off for being a lousy traitor. At least it was predictable. Harnol worked hard too, but he refused to stay past sunset and he never made any attempt to visit Fane, saying he had better things to do than be abused. So did Raelne, but he couldn’t bear the idea of Fane being left to rot on his own. Besides, his social life was
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nonexistent. If he didn’t talk to Fane, he wouldn’t even have the illusion of company in the evenings. In just three weeks, they’d successfully repaired the ancient reader and managed to connect it to a portable computer. They had, until now, been using a test disk, one created long ago specifically for calibrating the original readers. Suaj came into their workshop as they were ready to attempt the first full data download using a live disk. He watched as Raelne carefully placed the precious item in the reader. “Okay, Harnol. Set her spinning.” They were deliberately using a slow rotation to minimize any risk of damaging the disk—it would slow down access times, but preservation was more important than speed. “Reading,” Harnol announced. A few seconds later, the data screen filled with binary code. “Is that really the data?” Suaj asked. “Hope so,” Raelne said. “We won’t know until we run it through some translation.” After twenty minutes, the scan seemed to be complete. Raelne threw the data through the programme that decoded the binary, and then the hexadecimal into actual characters. “What is that?” Suaj peered at the screen and the information appearing on it. “Garbage, unfortunately. I think the reader’s working fine but I need to know what format the data is in, and if it’s compressed at all.” “Which is a software issue, and your speciality, not mine,” Harnol said cheerfully. “Hardly my speciality.” “You can’t make sense of this?” “Not yet. Suaj, I’m going to need as much as you can find for me about data formats and the approach used when these disks were created.” “I’ve had researchers looking at the archives for anything that might be of use.” “Then I want to know what they’ve found and have time to look it over. The people who set this up knew there was a real chance their readers would fail, and the disks would become inaccessible. They committed a lot of documentation to paper but there must be
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more than we’re using now. I’ll need a translator, possibly two or three. I could learn the Quarnian eventually, but…” “That’s an inefficient use of your time. I’ll assign you Werse, since he knows the archives.” “Hey, he’s my translator!” Harnol yelped. “I shall find you another,” Suaj said calmly, but as he turned away, his mouth twitched and Raelne had to fight down a grin. Poor Werse. Whoever replaced him would need nerves of steel. “How long will it take you to decipher it?” “If the people who created this have left enough information, and if our own databanks have enough information to help me, I think it’s going to be at least a month. More like three. I wasn’t kidding. I’m not an expert at this. I’m an aeronautical engineer, not a programmer. It’s a sideline for me. I’ll have to refresh what I learned in my degree, and then teach myself what I don’t know.” “Mister Joese can’t help you?” “He might speed it up slightly but I think you can make better use of him here.” “He’s right. He’s talking about historical research. I don’t have a clue.” Harnol winked at Raelne. Suaj frowned slightly. “Very well. I’ll arrange the access for you. I want weekly reports on your progress.” “Sure. I’ll probably need your help at some point. I’ll definitely need one of the portable computers, possibly two.” “I understand. Well, gentlemen, there’s a lot of work to be done. Let’s get on.”
Raelne ended up with ten assistants. Four to comb the archives for any more technical documentation, and even biographies of the original engineers, four to image them, and two—Werse and Sernan—to help decipher what they found. The original data readers and formats had been well documented, but there were still gaps because of damage to the paper archives over time, and the limitations of the
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authors’ admirable foresight. Raelne had to get inside the heads of those long-dead engineers and programmers to try and understand their thinking and methods. It was a fascinating, if frustratingly slow, process. Every few days he dropped into Suaj’s workshop and reported, Suaj concealing any impatience he might have felt at the slow progress, and offering advice and encouragement. Harnol was busy on other tasks and received Raelne’s updates politely, while making it clear it wasn’t something he wanted to get too involved in. Ironically, Fane took more interest in the whole thing than Harnol. Of course he claimed to be disgusted at Raelne’s efforts, but the requests for Raelne to leave became more perfunctory, while the accusations of him being a dirty traitor dropped to one per visit. Sometimes Fane forgot to mention it at all. He switched his scorn to the original Quarnian engineers, and to the stupidity of allowing such vital technology as data readers to become unusable, but the scientist in him couldn’t resist a challenge. Soon he was demanding to see Raelne’s notes and offering suggestions as to how to shortcut some of the difficulties. Raelne, naturally, pretended that the conversations remained about how incompetent the Quarnians were, and what a lousy engineer he was. Four months after they moved the Opil, Raelne called a meeting of all the engineers and assistants. “This is the latest data capture,” he said, as they clustered around the screen and examined the meaningless symbols. “And this is what it looks like after I’ve run it through my emulation.” People gasped as words appeared on the screen. “It’s Quarnian,” Suaj breathed. “You’ve succeeded.” “Not quite.” Raelne switched to Tusan for clarity. “I can access the text, but there are other data which are clearly images and digital recordings. You need those too. But now we can work out what’s on all the disks, and search. Harnol, we’re going to need those bigger display stations and printers.” “All in hand, man.” He turned to Suaj. “Then you’d better start planning for a hell of a lot of data to come your way.”
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Suaj grinned. “All in hand.” It was good enough reason for a little celebration. Two bottles of the oversweet local wine were broached and the whole research team, Tuzai and Quarnian, toasted and cheered. It was headier than the day Raelne had graduated, and a far more profound achievement, at least for the future of Quarn. Tiddly on wine and elation, Raelne walked over to Fane’s house after the workshop had closed down for the night, certain that even his grumpy friend wouldn’t be able to resist a glow of triumph at cracking this task. But when he arrived, he was asked to wait as a doctor was attending Mister Geril. “Doctor? Is he sick? Is it serious? Why wasn’t I told?” The soldiers on guard shook their heads. “Please wait,” was all they said. An army doctor came out a few minutes later and would only say that more tests were needed, refusing to discuss Fane’s condition at all with Raelne, which only made him worry more. His excitement forgotten in his anxiety, Raelne barrelled into the house. “Are you sick? What’s wrong with you, Fane?” Fane was in an armchair, rolling down a sleeve. Raelne’s abrupt arrival didn’t seem to surprise him at all. “Calm the hell down, son. I just have a bit of a stomachache. Had it for a couple of days and the soldiers insisted on calling that useless doctor of theirs.” “Stomachache? How bad?” “Just a nuisance. It’s easing up.” “The doctor said something about tests.” “Did you come over here to badger me about my gut or waste my time with more drivel about this stupid project of yours?” Raelne took the hint and changed the subject, but while Fane delighted in picking their great success to pieces and telling him just how hard it was going to be to decode the nontext data, Raelne couldn’t help but notice that his friend looked greyer. A little thinner too, although he’d never had much of an appetite and didn’t like the local food. Raelne made a note to himself to ask Suaj to release some of the ship’s food stores for
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Fane’s consumption, and to seek more information about his medical records. It would have to be done without appearing to fuss or Fane would tell him to shove it. Suaj readily agreed to allow Fane to be served food more familiar to him, and said he would do what he could about the medical information. Raelne visited his friend each evening, but Fane refused to talk about his condition, even though he continued to look grey and tired, the stomachache didn’t go away, and the different food made no difference to Fane’s appetite. He lost interest in arguing with Raelne over working with the Quarnians, growing querulous instead. Everything annoyed him, but he had no energy for prolonged conversations. Whatever this was, wasn’t just stomach flu or an infection, and a week later Raelne went with Fane to translate as he was admitted to the base medical centre for tests, including an endoscopy. He knew the results before Fane had woken from the anaesthesia, but though he kept his feelings to himself, Fane worked it out. “It’s the big one, isn’t it. Cancer,” he mumbled as he saw Raelne sitting beside his bed. “The doctors are going to come and talk to you soon.” “They talked to you already, didn’t they?” “Not in detail,” Raelne lied. “The main thing is that you need to rest and they’re going to adjust your diet to make it easier to eat.” “What’s the point? I’ll be dead before the Opil’s fixed, even if you’re ever allowed to fly home.” Raelne touched his hand. “Don’t be so defeatist.” “Just being realistic, Kine. Go on. Go back to work,” he growled. “Don’t waste time on me.” “I’m not.” “Shoo. Don’t make me punch you.” Raelne obeyed but only went as far as the waiting room. To his surprise, he found Suaj there, apparently waiting for him. “What are you doing here?” “I finished the task I was working on and I wondered how things had gone, so I thought I would come over. What news do you have?”
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“He’s got stomach cancer. Advanced. They can’t cure it.” He bit his lip and took a breath, trying not to cry in front of this man. “He’s got less than a year. Probably only months.” Suaj’s usual stern expression softened a little. “I’m very sorry.” “If we could get him home in the next couple of months, I know we could cure him. Our medicine is so much more advanced…Suaj, please. You have to give him a chance. Let Harnol work on the repairs to the ship. In a month, I know I’ll have cracked the back of the data project… Hell, I’ll stay on if you let him go back with Harnol. Please. Don’t let him die.” Suaj frowned. “You’d really stay? Sacrifice yourself for him?” “Yes. Please. Out of common humanity. I’ll do whatever you want. I don’t…I can’t let another one of our people die. He’s a good man. He’s got family, sisters, nieces and nephews.” “So do you.” “He’s dying. He doesn’t have to die.” Suaj hesitated. “I’ll speak to the commandant, but I don’t know if he’ll agree to losing Joese and your ship. I can only ask.” “Thank you.” Raelne wiped at his eyes. “I, uh, want to wait and see the doctors.” “I’ll call on the commandant now and then return…if that’s all right. I can give you a lift back to the workshop or wherever you need to go.” “Sure. Uh…do you want to?” “Concentrate on your friend, Rael. I’ll return shortly.” Suaj’s concern was the only bright spot in the whole situation. Raelne could only fret. The senior doctor came out half an hour later to ask Raelne to translate for him as he broke the bad news to the patient. Fane accepted it calmly and refused the suggestion of a gastrectomy, even though it could extend his life by months. “What’s the point?”
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“Suaj’s going to ask if we can start work immediately on repairing the Opil,” Raelne said. “We can send you back. You could even be cured. If you let them operate, you’ll buy us time. Please, Fane.” Fane made a rude noise. “They won’t let us leave.” “But if they will? Would you consider it?” “Let me think about it. I’m tired. My gut hurts.” Raelne reported this to the doctor. “We’ll start him on opiates.” The doctor spoke slowly so Raelne could understand completely. “We can manage his pain for now, at least.” “How long can a stomach operation give him, and how long before you can’t do it?” “The operation could give him months. The sooner we operate, the better. It’s not risk free, Mister Kine.” Raelne nodded and turned back to Fane. “They’ll give you something for the pain. Why don’t you get some sleep, think about what I said?” “Yeah, go away, Kine. You’re annoying.” Raelne grinned. “I am, definitely. See you later.” He spoke to the doctor in the corridor. “If I can do anything, if he needs anything. Please. Anytime, day or night. I want to know how he is.” “We will give him the best possible care, Mister Kine.” Suaj was back in the waiting room. “Commandant Hedike sends his deep regrets over the news and agrees to your request on the condition that you don’t leave with the other two. He very particularly said it had to be you who remained.” “Yeah, that’s okay. No argument? No other conditions?” “The government had planned to send a message back to your people if and when you all left, inviting them to come in friendship this time. Our government, ah…would prefer not to incur the enmity of your planet. There’s also some hope, admittedly small, that your people might send technical assistance. Cynical as it sounds, this gives weight to the government’s request, and emphasises good will. You would be asked to make a strong statement in support of our request.”
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Raelne stared, trying to accommodate this and failing. He didn’t care about politics right now. “Sure, anything. Just so he goes back.” “Raelne…you must be sure you’re prepared to make that kind of sacrifice.” “Decision’s already been made.” Raelne tilted his chin defiantly, trying to sound more determined than he felt. “I need to tell Harnol. Is he still on base?” “I believe so. The commandant says he’ll do whatever needs to be done to make your friend comfortable, and he’ll listen to all requests sympathetically. I too, will do whatever I can to help.” “Really appreciate that. Decent of you.” “We’re occasionally capable of it. Let’s hurry, if you want to catch Mister Joese.” Back at the workshop, Harnol listened in silence to Raelne’s news, then shook his head. “Poor bastard. Wouldn’t wish that on anyone.” “How long do you think it will take to repair the ship?” “Two months, tops. That’s not the problem. The astrogation—” “I will see if we have records that can assist there, Mister Joese,” Suaj said. Raelne rubbed his forehead. “Are you sure there are no backups?” “I’ve been through every blessed data store on the ship, man.” “And every disk? Every backup, every cache? Every single file?” “Well, no.” Harnol frowned. “Why would there be a backup of the astrogation settings there?” “I don’t know but I’m desperate.” Raelne turned to Suaj. “Do you have any problem with me using my evenings and days off to look through all that other material?” “Of course not. If I can be of any help, please let me know.” “If you can help Harnol with the repairs, that’d be best. We have to get him home. Harnol, I’m counting on you.” “Man, I don’t want him to die either. I’ll start right away.” “Rael, please use the rest of the day to do your searching. I’ll send a request for assistance to the astronomers.” “Thank you. Thank you both.”
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Everyone in the workshop wanted to help, which touched Raelne deeply and gave him hope that they might just pull this off. That he’d just agreed to stay on Quarn forever made his gut twist a little, but at least his family would know he was alive and well and that he’d made a free choice to stay. They’d know his fate, and that eased the worst part of being marooned for him. If they could save Fane’s life, it would make some small amends for Marpe and the others. Fane was taken back to his little house, and restrictions on his movements eased. He was allowed to come to the workshops, go where he liked, and he did make short visits to see how they were getting on, though he tired very easily and the pain medication made him sleepy. The rate at which he was losing weight frightened Raelne, but Fane was doing his best to eat what he could, and the cooks and the doctors and everyone involved in his care were working to help him keep his weight up. He’d rejected the operation to remove his stomach for the entirely sensible reason that the procedure was highly risky with the current state of Quarnian medicine, and could shorten his life, not lengthen it. If he returned to Tuzax in time, then he’d want an intact stomach. Raelne wasn’t sure he would even survive the operation, and was secretly glad he’d refused, even if it did put more pressure on them. The ship repairs were going well, but the astrogation settings were still nowhere to be found, and Suaj had only had limited success with the star maps. The Quarnian records simply weren’t accurate enough for hyperdrive travel. Tuzax didn’t even appear in them. That wouldn’t normally matter—if they could get close enough and set up a distress beacon, they could just sit back and wait to be picked up. But Fane didn’t have that kind of time. Harnol’s repairs were finished in six weeks. Fane’s condition had deteriorated further by then, and he’d been admitted to hospital to be given better pain relief and tube feeding. He was strong enough to growl at Raelne when he visited, telling him to stop slacking and get back to work, but that was about it. Two weeks after Fane went back into hospital, Raelne, reduced to desperate measures, did a trawl through the deleted but unpurged files on all the portables and
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found a copy of the astrogation data on Marpe’s computer. He copied it off, verified it, then ran to Harnol and gave the disk to him with shaking hands. “Hurry,” he whispered. “I’m going over to tell him.” Fane was drowsing when Raelne reached his room, but woke up as Raelne sat down. “Slacking…again…Kine?” His breathing was laboured and his colour was awful. At least he was where the doctors could keep an eye on him. “We’ve done it. You can go home, Fane.” “S’good. Tell…Anat…” Anat was his younger sister. “Tell her what? You can tell her yourself in a week.” But Fane had fallen asleep again. Raelne slipped out and found the doctor. “Can you stabilise him for travel? We should be ready to go in a day. No more than two.” “We’ll do our best, Mister Kine. His condition is serious, as you know.” “Just give me a week. I know if we can get him home, we’ll save him.” The doctor nodded. “I understand.” Raelne returned to the workshop and worked with Harnol to complete the final calibrations. “We just need a day to test. It’ll take you that long to organise supplies and medical support for Fane.” “All right, but no longer than that, Harnol. You didn’t see him. He hasn’t got long.” Harnol clapped him on the shoulder. “Long enough. We’ve done it, man. We’ve done it.” Raelne risked a grin. “Yeah, I think we have. And in a week, you’ll be home.” “You know I’d stay…” “Deal was for me. Go home, tell my family what happened, give them my messages, make sure people know what we sacrificed. You never know, they might send a ship back for me.” “I really doubt that. I feel bad about it, Rael.” “Don’t. I’ve got what I wanted here—a chance to make a difference.” Give him enough time and he might even convince himself, Raelne thought wryly. “Come on, we’re not finished yet.”
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He staggered home at midnight, happy that the ship was as ready for space as two highly trained engineers and a team of eager assistants could make it. At four in the morning, he was woken by an urgent, “Raelne, wake up, you’re needed.” He struggled to open his eyes, and shielded them against the overhead light. “Suaj? What’s wrong?” “Your friend’s in surgery. They need you to donate blood.” Surgery? Why? “Damn, of course.” He scrabbled for his clothes and ran out behind Suaj to the automobile that raced them across the base to the medical centre. “What happened?” he shouted against the engine noise. “He suffered a catastrophic haemorrhage. They’re giving him the blood you already donated, but they’ll need more.” It was like some horrible nightmare brought on by the stress of being so close, but unfortunately, it was real. “Anyone told Harnol?” Harnol was a prick but he’d worked as hard as the rest of them to get Fane home in time. Surely he’d care. “Not yet. His blood isn’t compatible, remember?” “Yeah, but…” Raelne scrubbed at his eyes and tried to make himself a little more alert. It didn’t matter. No point both of them being woken up in the middle of the night, and making small talk with Harnol while they waited probably wouldn’t do either of them any good. None of it would help their friend. Come on, Fane. Just hold on a little longer. Suaj went off to find out what he could and report to the commandant’s office, while a nurse rushed Raelne to a room close to the operating theatre and hooked him up to a blood-collecting bottle. The woman’s tense competency, her polite nonanswers to his anxious questions, did nothing to ease his worry. He watched the blood drip thickly into the bottle, willing it to flow more quickly, the faster to be ready for Fane. But only a dribble had been collected by the time a doctor, still in scrubs, came in. “Unhook him, we won’t need it,” he told the nurse. The doctor’s defeated expression, the way he avoided Raelne’s eyes, told him instantly what had happened. “How?”
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“We just couldn’t contain the bleeding. He had a heart attack on the table and we couldn’t revive him. I’m sorry.” Raelne nodded, feeling numb, not really able to take it in. In the silence that followed, he struggled to find the necessary courtesies. “Thank you for all you did for him.” The doctor bowed. “I wish it had been more. He fought bravely to the end.” Of course he had. Fane never shrank from what was hard, or unpleasant. Honest, obdurate, courageous to the last. Why had this happened to him? Suaj came in a minute or so after the doctor left. “I heard, Rael. I’m sorry.” The nurse finished disconnecting Raelne from the collection apparatus and put a dressing over the needle insertion point. After she’d collected all the used equipment and left, Raelne sat on the edge of the gurney and put his head in his hands. “This mission was cursed from the moment we left. We’re nearly up to a life for a life here. Think that’s what your spirits want?” “I don’t believe that. You’ll want to discuss the funeral arrangements with Joese. Commandant Hedike will be sympathetic to whatever you wish to do.” Raelne knew bugger all about funerals, and right now, couldn’t swing his mind onto the topic. He kept thinking of Fane in a room close to where he sat. The man had seemed indomitable. How could he be dead so fast? “Yeah. What time is it?” He’d left so quickly, he hadn’t put his watch on. “Five minutes to five. You should go back to bed.” His body ached with tiredness, but his mind was wired, racing. He wouldn’t sleep, he knew. “Doesn’t seem respectful somehow, just to go back to sleep when he’s lying in there, dead.” “Do you wish to view his body?” “No. I mean…I should. But not now.” He looked up. “I wanted him to live, Suaj. He was a good man. He didn’t deserve this.”
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“No one ‘deserves’ it, Rael. And I know no one could have worked harder to send him home in time than you. It was bad luck. Not the will of a god, or a punishment. Just pure misfortune. You have nothing to blame yourself for.” “Not sure I agree.” Raelne stood. The emptiness, the disorientation, was so powerful he nearly retched. “Think I might walk back. I need time to…take it in.” “Would you like company?” Raelne stared in surprise. “Yeah. But no offence, I want to talk to a friend right now and…you don’t exactly fit the bill.” Suaj stiffened. “Would you like me fetch Mister Joese?” Bloody hell. The last thing he wanted was Harnol’s abrasive company. “He’s not really a friend either. I appreciate the offer but I don’t think you can help. I mean…not any more. I’m grateful for all you’ve done. I know you wanted this to work.” Suaj inclined his head. “Indeed. I’ll have a message sent to Mister Joese, and you can let me know what arrangements you wish. Of course you won’t be expected to work today. Take as much time off as you need.” “Thanks. See you later.” He slipped past the man, wishing Suaj was a friend and not only a colleague because he just…wanted to talk about Fane. How he felt, how angry he was, how he already missed the man and his obstinate decency. He glanced at the doors to the surgical theatre. Was Fane’s body still in there? Had he suffered? Was it better this way, maybe, than a lingering death back on Tuzax? He tore himself away and walked outside into the predawn air. Spring was beautiful on this planet with the huge sun and the intensely blue skies, and the dawns were glorious, crisp and cool and scented with the faintest hint of blossoms. It wasn’t right Fane had died at this time of day. It wasn’t right that he’d never see a dawn again. Raelne hugged himself and walked across the base, grateful he was now trusted enough not to need a guard and fluent enough not to need a translator. He was settling in. He’d made a deliberate attempt to adjust his thinking once he thought he’d be stuck here. Now…was he going home after all? He didn’t want to, if the price was Fane’s death. But
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Fane was dead, and the ship was ready to depart as soon as the Quarnians agreed he could leave. A few hours ago he was resigned to staying. Now he could go… The prospect brought him little joy, in the circumstances. But what did he have here? A few colleagues, a challenge he could spend a lifetime on, but he had those in as great a number back home. No friends, only Harnol who he didn’t like all that much, and Suaj who he liked a lot but who’d made it plain that he didn’t particularly like Raelne. Kids like Sernan were great, but they didn’t have enough in common with him, or life experience, to be companions. The closest person he’d had to a best friend on this planet had just died. He stared towards the rising sun and the beauty of the gold-lit spring sky. “Goodbye, Geril Fane. You were a good man, and I’m proud to have known you.” Somehow, it didn’t seem any more real to him for saying it out loud. It wasn’t fair.
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Chapter Seven
He returned to work the next day. Everyone was sympathetic, subdued. They’d all pulled so hard for the three aliens. It hadn’t mattered that technically, the Tuzai were enemies and prisoners. They’d just wanted Fane to go home and be well. It made it easier for Raelne to be around them, to draw comfort from them, but he had an unshakeable feeling that he’d let everyone down somehow. It made no sense, but he couldn’t reason himself out of it. Harnol took it in his stride, and to Raelne’s relief, offered to take charge of the funeral. He’d organised them before, which Raelne hadn’t. He also didn’t make any of the tactless remarks Raelne half-expected about him being able to go home now, and maybe it was all for the best, and other stupidities. When the situation was serious enough, Harnol, it seemed, could actually keep his mouth shut. The Quarnians held a lovely, dignified service at sunset, over at the base’s graveyard. Commandant Hedike spoke, and so did Harnol. Raelne couldn’t. He didn’t think he could get through it without breaking down. He found it very hard to talk to anyone about it at all, actually. It was easier not to and just get on with his work, of which there was always more than he had hours in the day for. They were close to decoding the visual and audio material in the Quarnian data, and at that point, he could fairly argue that he had fulfilled his side of the agreement with his captors. But there was still so much to do to really secure the future of the data, and of the technologies that would rely on it. He could spare them a few months out of his life, and he owed the Quarnians for what they’d tried to do for Fane. Harnol had no problem with that at all. “Don’t know why you’re in such a rush to go back, to be honest. Life’s bloody good here. You know the minute we agreed to stay
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permanently, we’d be showered with privileges. Here, I can even get married. Can’t back home. Neither can you. No one wants infertile men.” “Never want to be married, actually. Who’d have you?” Harnol winked. “Well now. Seems not all the Quarnians think we’re ugly. That’s why you need to move off base, man. You’re missing out.” Raelne couldn’t imagine being drawn to anyone who could contemplate sleeping with Harnol. “Not interested. I just want to do the job and go. If you don’t want to come with me, that’s up to you. I can fly the ship single-handed.” “Let me consider my options. If I won’t hold you back, that gives me more choice. You should think about staying, though. Tuzax’s got no future. That’s why we’re here.” “I don’t think like that, Harnol.” “You don’t need to be all offended, man.” Raelne stood. “I better go back to work.” That was as long as he could stand talking to Harnol lately. Or anyone, if it wasn’t about the job. The work was never-ending, and knowing he had only a limited time to achieve what he wanted drove him on. He stopped taking rest days since there was little point, and when Suaj closed the shop down in the evenings, Raelne spent his time poring over the images of the paper documentation they had gleaned from the national archives. He wanted to leave his mark on this society. Give them something back that was good and life-giving, instead of the death he and his teammates had visited on the Quarnians and on themselves. Suaj made a couple of remarks about him overdoing it, which was rich coming from a man with no social life and who apparently never took any time off at all. But Suaj never raised the idea of Raelne staying on Quarn, probably because he knew it was a waste of time. Raelne didn’t know if Harnol had spoken to anyone about living here permanently. It was his business if he wanted to do that. The data were flowing nicely, and the task now was to build readers, screens and printers that the Quarnians could reproduce and repair themselves. Raelne couldn’t offer them enough of his time to develop all the technologies they’d need, but he could give
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them a head start. He wanted to be sure they would succeed. That success was his most important goal. His only goal, frankly. A month and a half after Fane’s death, Harnol came looking for him in the workshop. “What is it, Harnol? I’m busy.” “Don’t care how busy you are. You’ll want to see this.” “Take it away and remachine that component, please,” Raelne asked his assistant. As the woman left them alone, he turned to his colleague. “Well?” Harnol handed him a printout. Raelne scanned it impatiently, then more carefully as he realised what it was. “Are you sure?” “As I can be. Ran all the tests five times. We’ve lost seventy percent power generation.” “How is that even possible?” Harnol explained how he’d discovered several vital components had burned out beyond repair. “I think it has to be a fault that’s developed since we moved the ship. I’d have picked it up before if it was anything to do with the self-destruct.” Raelne laid the piece of paper down. “Can we fix it?” “See, that’s the bad news. No. We don’t have spares for those components. Can’t make them either. They’re made of reuilium. Doesn’t exist on this planet.” Raelne looked at Harnol, his stomach knotting up. “We can still go home, though, right?” But he already knew the answer from Harnol’s expression. Harnol shook his head. “The ship will fly, sure, but we can’t use hyperdrive at full capacity so it will take longer. It’ll reach Tuzax eventually—but only if we turn off the life support. Completely. No life support, no crew, no passengers. Means you and I are going nowhere. I’m sorry, man.” “There must be a mistake.” “Sorry. Been over it and over it. I wanted to be sure before I told you. What we have out there is this planet’s biggest paperweight.” “Check it again,” Raelne demanded. “Maybe we can make the parts out of an equivalent metal.”
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“Already looked into that too, Rael. I can run all the checks again, but you have to face it. We can’t fly in that vessel.” “EVA suits.” “The flight will take over a month. We can’t live in them for that long.” “Bypass the damaged components. Come on, Harnol, this thing was built with triple redundancy in every system.” “Man, it’s the redundancies giving us any power at all. The only good news is that we can hook her up to the electricity generation here and keep all the equipment running without any problems. If we don’t do that, we’ll drain down to under five percent in a month.” Raelne closed his eyes. “All right. Just…go. I need to…you know.” “I’m sorry, Rael. It doesn’t have to be all bad.” Raelne waved him away, eyes still closed. He’d called it right when Fane died. The mission was cursed. He opened his eyes and stared at the piece of equipment whose transformer he was in the middle of modifying. He forced himself to only think about the job in hand. He couldn’t deal with the rest of it. There had to be a way— “Kine!” “Stop!” He jerked back, and glared at Suaj stalking over to him. “What?” “You were about to close the circuit.” Raelne looked down, where his hands were, the tools he was holding. He backed away from the equipment that he had nearly allowed to electrocute him. “I, uh…” He dropped the tools on the bench and walked out, eyes unseeing, his mind blank. He didn’t remember another thing until he found himself in his house, sitting on his sofa, shaking. He couldn’t…couldn’t do it any more. He couldn’t. “Raelne. Raelne!” He hadn’t heard the man come in the front door. Didn’t matter. “I can’t do it any more, Suaj,” he whispered. “We’re cursed.” Suaj crouched down and seized his hands. “Look at me, Raelne. Look at me!”
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Raelne obeyed and stared into the man’s big hazel-green eyes. “I can’t go home.” “Harnol told me. I’m deeply sorry. He explained the situation. I’m afraid I can’t offer any hope since we have no metals which will work for the task.” Raelne freed a hand and wiped it across his brow. He was sweating, but he felt cold. “I…I can’t.” “You need to rest for a bit.” Suaj tugged him to his feet and urged him towards his bedroom, making him lie down on the bed. He felt Suaj pulling his boots off but he couldn’t make himself help or tell the man to stop. He just wanted him, it, everything to go away. He woke several hours later to find Suaj in a chair at his bedside, reading a book by the light of his bedside lamp. “What are you doing here?” he mumbled. “Keeping an eye on you. How do you feel?” “Uh…exhausted. What time is it?” “Nine. In the evening. I’ve spoken to the doctors here and they’d like to examine you, but regardless Commandant Hedike has ordered you to take two weeks’ leave, starting immediately.” He struggled to a sitting position. His body felt like lead. “And do what? Sit here and think about spending the rest of my life as a prisoner? I don’t have any friends, any hobbies. I just want to finish my tasks and go home.” “You can’t. You’ll always have more tasks than you can complete here, and you can’t go home.” Raelne swallowed. He felt like lying down again and bawling his eyes out like a kid. Wouldn’t help the situation, but it was as useful as anything else he could do. “I want to work.” “You’ve been overdoing it. I tried to warn you. Your standards have been slipping, but until now, we’ve been able to work around that. But today, you could have died. Enough, Raelne. You need to stop for a while.” “I’ll go crazy sitting here. I’ll talk to Hedike—” “No. He and I are in agreement.”
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“You never damn well take a break!” “Untrue, actually. My working pattern these last few months have been unusual because of the unusual situation.” Suaj leaned forward. “I’ll stay here tonight in the other room. You should get some more sleep. Tomorrow I’ll accompany you to the medical centre.” “I don’t need a nurse.” “Commandant Hedike has ordered it.” So that was that. “Whatever.” He got to his feet but had to grab the bedside table as a wave of dizziness overcame him. “Hell.” “Take it easy, Rael. I’ll make a light meal. Tomorrow we’ll discuss what you can do on your vacation.” “Why are you doing this?” “You’re a colleague in need of assistance, and, whatever you think, I’m not entirely heartless. You’ve been under considerable stress even before your friend died, and the news today was a terrible blow. Anyone would crumple under it.” “Harnol’s just fine, isn’t he?” “Joese has made a separate life for himself. Much as I dislike the man, his strategy is healthier. Go on, wash your face. We can eat together.” Raelne wished Suaj would go away. He didn’t want anyone to see him like this, or pity him, or manage him like a fresh-faced student overwhelmed by his exams. Suaj couldn’t send him home and that was the only thing Raelne wanted. He decided to shower, and he felt more alert, if just as tired, when he came out. He only pulled on a bathrobe—if Suaj wanted to be offended or disgusted by his pale skin, too damn bad. He came into the kitchen and found Suaj preparing a meal of bread and cheese. “We need to look into your domestic arrangements, Rael. If you don’t like to cook for yourself, you can eat in the officers’ mess.” “No time, and less interest. I’ve been busy.”
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“An engine won’t run on incorrect or insufficient fuel, and neither will you. You’ve been careless of your health and as your nominal supervisor, I take the blame for not noticing.” “You’re not my mother.” “How observant of you. Sit, eat. Unlike your mother, that’s as much encouragement as I’ll give you.” He didn’t think he was hungry, but the company and Suaj’s undemanding conversation persuaded him to eat more than he’d have thought he wanted. Suaj made them some of the local tea, which Raelne had at first thought tasted like piss, but had become used to, even somewhat fond of. “What I really need is a drink,” he said after he took a sip from his mug. “Alcohol isn’t a good idea, as you probably know.” “I do know. But a drink would make my brain stop.” “There are other ways of achieving that.” Raelne laughed derisively. “Harnol thinks sex is the best way. I can’t believe he’s having any luck.” “Strangely he is. Amazing what the combination of exotic looks and apparent affluence can do for an unprepossessing man. Did you leave anyone behind?” “Me? No. Not a girlfriend, for sure. Infertile men aren’t in much demand. Not that I care.” Suaj cocked his head. “Why?” “Not into women. Not sure Harnol knows that, but he’s too self-centred to care anyway. Uh…is that a problem in your society?” “No. Inverts have equal rights, and in the cities, no one cares that much so long as they’re prepared to act as sperm donors and pay their family-support tax. It might be a problem in the smaller settlements, but I’ve never been tempted to live in one myself.” “I can’t do what he’s doing. I don’t want to admit that I can’t leave. Not yet, anyway. Funny, before, when Fane…I was ready. I knew it was how it had to be. I made a choice
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for good reasons. But now the choice is taken away, I’m angry as hell. Doesn’t make sense.” “Human emotions often don’t. Do you think you can sleep?” “No idea, but I’ll try. You really don’t have to stay. I’m not going to kill myself or anything.” Suaj gave him an odd look. “The commandant has ordered it. Don’t upset yourself on my account, Raelne. I’ve slept in less congenial settings.” “Suit yourself. Thanks for supper.” Suaj inclined his head. “You’re welcome. Sleep well, Rael.” Raelne stumbled off. He had to change Hedike’s mind about two weeks off. A couple of days, maybe. But two weeks sitting here would send him round the twist. Suaj better not have any crazy idea about keeping him company either. Bad enough one of them was out of action.
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Chapter Eight
He slept like a dead man, and woke feeling leaden and uninterested in what the new day might bring. He’d forgotten about his houseguest until Suaj, wearing pyjamas, scared the crap out of him by walking into his bedroom. “Good morning,” Suaj said in Quarnian. “Holy Zoka! What are you…oh.” He rubbed his eyes and looked at the clock on his bedside table. “Why aren’t you at work?” “I said, I’m taking you to the medical centre.” “You don’t need to take the day off for that.” “No, but I’m going to. Are you going to sleep again?” “No.” He sighed. “You better get out. I’m not wearing clothes.” “And I haven’t eaten. Thanks for the warning.” Then he left as Raelne screwed up his nose at his rude visitor. Suaj wouldn’t listen to any arguments about him not going to the medical centre, so Raelne had to give in, feeling like an idiot. The doctor examined him thoroughly, and way too intrusively, before declaring that he needed a period of rest and relaxation, to find hobbies outside work, and to limit his working hours to what was reasonable. “If you are now forced to be resident here, Mister Kine, you must make a life outside work. Make friends, a social life. These things are necessary for a healthy existence.” “Yeah, yeah,” Raelne muttered. “I’m supposed to get over everything just like that.” “Talking to a sympathetic person would help. My door is always open,” he added politely. “Thanks,” Raelne said while privately thinking he’d rather gnaw his arm off at the elbow than talk to a stranger about his feelings.
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Suaj waited for him outside, leaning against the automobile. “Rest, make friends, get a life,” Raelne reported. “Don’t you guys do antidepressants?” “Our technological level isn’t that advanced. Until you’ve tried his advice, drugs would seem to be an overhasty reaction. Come with me.” “Where?” “An excursion. You had other plans?” “No, but—” “Then come with me.” They drove off the base, the first time Raelne had left the place without a guard. Of course, where could he go? “I suppose I could have that pardon now.” “Yours for the asking. Don’t talk about your situation.” “The doctor said—” “Hush.” Raelne rolled his eyes, sat back and enjoyed the ride. They drove about three quen through farms and open plains. Raelne couldn’t begin to guess where they were headed, but then he saw something that seemed very familiar. “Hey, that’s a windsock. Wait—an airfield?” Suaj grinned. “You knew we had aircraft.” “Yeah, but I didn’t know…you have a plane?” “Wait and see.” Now the hangars were in view, and yes, there they were. Small, beautiful, silverywhite airplanes. “Holy Zoka, Suaj, why aren’t you using these for long-distance travel?” “Many reasons, none of which are important right now. Tell me, Mister Kine, would a flight in something as small as one of these match up to flying a spacecraft?” “Are you kidding?” Suaj smirked and drove them up to the main hangar. As they climbed out of the automobile, a man in smart grey overalls came up and shook his hand. Suaj made introductions. “Rael, this is Leke. He’s our main engineer on the field. Leke, this is Kine Raelne. One of the people from Tuzax. I told you about him.”
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“You did and I’ve been waiting to meet you, Mister Kine. Come and have a look at this.” Without further ceremony, Raelne was dragged off and in seconds, was deep in a conversation about turboprop engines and fuel consumption. The Tuzai jetpacks were of intense interest too. Leke had been straining at the bit to start pulling one of them apart but until now, the project had been put aside in favour of more urgent tasks. Suaj helped with the translation when things went past Raelne’s abilities, but other than that, Raelne was treated as if he was an honoured guest and advisor, not an alien criminal. Leke proudly showed him their extensive workshops where twenty or so men and women were working on engines and other aircraft components. “We normally have more, but you fellows on the base have stolen my best people.” “This is an important training and testing ground for new technology,” Suaj explained to Raelne. “Much of what you have helped us recover will be explored here, and the tested technology will be passed back to the civilian population.” “But why aircraft?” “Why not?” “I didn’t bring you out here to work. Come with me.” Reluctantly Raelne agreed, though he longed to stay and see what these people were doing. Sure, it was older tech, but there was something about the earlier aircraft engines that he’d always loved. Suaj took him to a smaller hangar on the side of the main one. “I built this one from scratch.” He opened the sliding door and stepped inside. “She’s gorgeous,” Raelne breathed. The single-engine plane was pure white with a dual-seat cabin. “Fibreglass?” “Yes, mostly. We don’t have an exact analogue for the alloys you’ve told us about, but we have some which are reasonably light and strong. They’re rare and expensive though.” “That’s a problem. What’s her cruising speed and maximum range?” “A hundred and twenty quen per hour, and four hundred and fifty quen.” “Sweet. Let me look under the hood.”
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The little plane was as sleek inside as she was out—a real labour of love, and one that made Raelne reassess his opinion of his self-contained companion. Someone who could build something like this wasn’t just an engineer, he was an artist. “Are we going up in her?” “I never thought you’d ask.” The two-person cockpit was a snug fit for someone of Raelne’s build—he’d never seen a fat Quarnian and he looked positively obese next to Suaj, even though he was in fact on the light side for someone of his height. But he fitted in well enough, and any minor discomfort was swamped by sheer anticipation. “Shall we?” Suaj asked after they completed preflight checks and started her up. The engine had to be warmed, he explained, using an electrical system, then the biodiesel could be switched on. Taxiing could be carried out on the electrics, and the warmup only took a couple of minutes. The sheer rush of takeoff never ceased to thrill Raelne and he whooped quietly with pleasure as they reached cruising speed, flying over the flat plains towards a range of mountains in the east. “She flies beautifully.” “Ah. I was hoping you would say I did.” Raelne snorted at the joke. “Have you flown in a machine of this type?” “A couple of times. They’re more a hobbyist craft on Tuzax, for real enthusiasts.” “Would you like to take the stick?” “Are you sure?” Suaj glanced at him. “I won’t offer twice.” “Then hell yes.” It took him very little time to get used to handling the little plane, Suaj watching carefully to seize back the stick if Raelne got into difficulties. “She’s sweet, Suaj. The controls are very light.” “You have heavy hands,” Suaj joked. “Head towards that range. There’s a lake we can land near.”
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Raelne was tremendously flattered that Suaj allowed him to land on his own, and relieved that his skills were up to that trust, easing the plane down on an area of flat dirt he suspected had been used for this purpose before. If he owned the plane, this would be the kind of place he’d visit all the time. The large lake was a deep indigo blue, with attractive and interesting reddish rock formations to the far end reflected perfectly in its mirrored surface. Graceful weeping trees edged the water, and the skies were full of birdcalls. “It’s gorgeous here.” “Yes. It’s a favourite place of mine. Did you enjoy that—flying, I mean?” “Very much,” he said fervently. “I really miss it. I thought I’d given it up, maybe not forever, but for years. Thank you.” “You’re welcome, but it isn’t purely altruistic. Come and sit.” A fallen tree made a comfortable seat by the water’s edge. In the shallows, little yellow fish swam. Raelne had no idea what they were called, or if they grew any bigger. He knew almost nothing of the natural history of this planet. Maybe it was time he learned about it, if he really was stuck here… “Stop thinking about it. I have a proposition for you. How would you like a two-week flying holiday?” “In this? With you? Why?” “I need a break, and clearly so do you. I normally take two weeks a year to visit our aeronautical workshops up the east coast. This year, I’ve been delayed by two months and wasn’t expecting to go at all. How would you like to come with me?” “Really? I’d love it. But what about fuel?” “The route is determined by where we can access the biodiesel. The coastal communities have always had a decent supply because of local cultivation, but transporting it inland is difficult. The palm-oil plantations are only a fragment of their former size and the government has just begun to put some effort into rebuilding them. Our priority has been electrical power generation and hydrogen gas output. What oil we still produce is largely used for lubrication and the production of items like soap,
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although output is slowly increasing and we have begun to develop other plant sources. Part of this research we do is investigating fuel types and engine efficiencies.” “I’d be honoured to go along, if you think I could be of any use.” Suaj smiled a little. “My only concern is whether our engineers will let you leave, Rael. Leke’s been pestering me for months to bring you out to his airfield. In retrospect, I wish I had.” “We’ve been busy.” Though in the end, it hadn’t been enough, he thought bitterly. “Yes, but I haven’t paid sufficient attention to your social needs. This would be a chance to repair some of that lack.” Raelne shook his head. “When did you have time to build a plane?” Suaj grinned, white teeth splitting his saturnine features. “Mister Joese’s price for cooperation was a house and a ludicrous salary. Mine was an airfield and a workshop. I told them I wanted to build a plane or I wouldn’t work for them.” Raelne laughed. “Now why the hell didn’t I think of that?” “You can, if you wish. I’m going to enforce rest days more strictly from now on. You’d be welcome to spend them out on the airfield.” “Sure beats staring at my living-room walls.” He frowned. “Are you sure you want to spend two weeks in my company? The train trip didn’t go so well.” “Ah… I think we may have moved on since then. I could ask the same question of you, since you so firmly rejected my company once before when you were under emotional stress.” Suaj waited calmly for his answer. “I think…in some ways maybe I’d be more comfortable with someone not so close to me, but who I can talk to when I want to. Does that make sense?” “Perfectly. I’ll endeavour not to place any stress on you. I was thinking of leaving tomorrow.” “Tomorrow! But what about the shop? All the work we’re in the middle of?” “It can wait or my staff can complete it. As for your tasks, Joese is competent to handle those.”
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“Yeah, and it’s not like there’s any hurry any more.” “Rael…” “Okay, I won’t talk about it. I guess we’re travelling light?” “Indeed. The plane can easily take your weight but it will increase fuel consumption. It should be manageable, but luggage will have to be kept to a minimum—ten sak each, no more, and less if you can manage it. We won’t be camping out, you’ll be relieved to know.” “Very. Are you going to let me fly any of it?” Suaj showed his teeth again. “I might be persuaded.” Raelne grinned. It was the first time he’d felt like smiling in months. Suaj couldn’t have come up with a better plan for his enforced time off if he’d thought about it for a year. Preparing for the trip, talking over the flight plan with Suaj, gave Raelne something far more pleasant to think about for the rest of that day, and he slept more easily than he had in months. Suaj collected him in an automobile and they headed to the airfield before dawn. After doing the preflight check together, they took off into a pink and golden sky. The weather forecast was excellent for the next three days and flying conditions perfect. Suaj let him handle takeoff and as they rose, Raelne felt his heart lift too, for the first time in so long that he’d almost forgotten what it felt like. Navigation was child’s play—just head north. The aircraft had a range of four hundred quen even with the extra payload, but they would be doing a maximum of three hundred, giving them a safe margin and allowing for an excursion or two if they chose. He handed control back to Suaj once they were at cruising altitude. His companion handled the plane with the same deft ability he showed with all equipment. All Quarnians had claw-like nails, which took Raelne some getting used to, but together with their long fingers, the nails added to an overall manual dexterity that he envied. They were a graceful race all round, in fact. Raelne felt stolid and lumpy near them, and he still wondered at how the chubby and frankly unattractive Harnol had apparently won multiple lovers from their ranks.
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They flew without talking for the first hour, Raelne content to watch the landscape and the sunlight over the many small ranges. Then Suaj began to comment on the geography, and that led into Raelne’s regrets over knowing so little about the plants and animals. Suaj surprised him yet again with the depth of his knowledge and interest on the subject. “Is there anything you don’t know about?” Raelne asked wryly after his companion had expounded for some minutes on the lineage of a common domestic animal. “Music. I have no appreciation for it and I can’t sing a note. Another reason I’m not really an Angel. They have voices of gods.” “Do you think we’ll see any on this trip?” Suaj shook his head. “The known populations are all west of us, as I’m sure you know from your own investigations.” Raelne didn’t rise to the bait. “But you’ve seen them.” “Only once, from a distance. And some film footage. I’ve read everything our records hold about them. They have been described as sounding like flutes, pipe organs and a good many other fanciful things. I’ve been told my voice is like a rejer trying to shit out a painful stool.” Suaj’s offended expression as he said this only made it more hilarious. Raelne laughed until he nearly choked. “Now that, I have to hear.” “Certainly not. I have my dignity to preserve.” But his mouth twitched and Raelne grinned. They landed before noon at a little airfield on the coast, just slightly north of a town called Sern. The engineers and ground crew greeted Suaj enthusiastically, but Raelne’s appearance caused near hysteria, despite the advance warning. He was dragged from project to project, asked his opinion on a dozen different aircraft, questioned intensively about aviation on Tuzax, and nearly talked into riding in a prototype plane, until Suaj put his foot down. “Mister Kine is a little too valuable to risk in that manner,” he told his disappointed engineers. “And certainly not before lunch.”
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Their arrival was the cue for a half-day’s holiday, and something of a party on the beach onto which the airfield bordered. Raelne discovered that living rejers might be smelly damn things, but dead ones seasoned with herbs and roasted on a fire pit were delicious. As was the local beer, a cask of which was broken out in their honour. It slipped down very nicely on a hot day. His fair skin forced him to spend most of the afternoon in the shade. There were worse ways to pass a few hours than digesting a huge meal of meat and bread, nursing a bottle of excellent beer under a heavily leaning tree, and watching the young engineers clowning on the sand and throwing each other into the water. He’d stripped down to the waist because of the heat, and his alien anatomy had caused some brief curiosity before his new friends found something more interesting to talk about. Suaj was still all buttoned up. He looked hot and sweaty, and just a little morose. “No one’s going to care if you take your shirt off,” Raelne said, before letting out a belch. “’Scuse me.” Suaj shot him a look. “Charming.” “Why don’t you go for a swim? I’ll fry, but you won’t.” “I have to retain my dignity.” Raelne made a rude noise. “My arse. Aren’t we supposed to be on holiday?” “You are. I’m on duty.” Raelne lifted his beer, which matched the one in Suaj’s hand. “Yeah? Drink on duty much?” “Shut up, Rael.” Raelne obeyed, not wanting to piss away his good mood or the tenuous friendliness they’d built up. He felt happy and lately, that was an almost mythical emotion for him. He lay back, leaning on his elbows, and wondered if he could sustain this. Whether days like this could compensate him for the loss of his home. Whether he would ever stop being homesick, and whether the knot of pain that was Fane’s death would ever disappear from under his ribs. If he could just send a message back to his parents…
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He was drawn out of his reverie by Suaj standing up and taking off his shirt, folding it tidily, then removing his trousers, leaving only the standard grey army underpants. Raelne couldn’t stop staring, even though he knew how much Suaj disliked that, lost in how beautiful the man was in his silver-white fur. “Mind my drink.” Suaj bent down to hand it to him. “And put your tongue back in your head.” Raelne stuck it out at him before closing his mouth, and Suaj’s mouth quirked. He turned and ran down the sand towards the water. Some of the younger staff stopped throwing the ball between them to watch their senior engineer run into the sea, so Suaj’s true appearance apparently wasn’t common knowledge. But then they went back to playing. It might be unusual, but it wasn’t something that bothered them. Raelne hoped Suaj had noticed their reaction. He’d finished his beer and started on Suaj’s before the man walked out of the water and shook himself. The disadvantage of fur, Raelne thought, but the way it shone in the sun seemed magical to him. “That’s my drink,” Suaj remarked indignantly as he came back over to Raelne’s shady spot. “Didn’t want it to get hot,” Raelne said with a grin. “Fetch a fresh one.” “You fetch a fresh one.” Suaj snatched the bottle from him and flopped down on the sand. Raelne climbed to his feet. “Oof. I’ve put on weight. All that sand’ll be a bitch to get out later.” “You were the one who made me go for a swim. I should make you brush it out.” “Okay.” Suaj blinked up at him, and something passed between them that Raelne hadn’t experienced since about a year before he’d left Tuzax. Something that he didn’t dare bring out into the open by commenting on it. “Uh, I’ll get the beer.” Then he bolted.
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Shit. Suaj didn’t even like him. Raelne shouldn’t be…would he really let him comb his fur? Touch him? He shook his head. Too much beer and sun had fried his brain and made him stupid. He asked the friendly young technician minding the ice chest for a glass of cold tea for himself and a beer for the boss, and took his time wandering back. Suaj was still sipping the end of his warmed drink, idly brushing his hand across his knee. Raelne handed him the fresh beer and tried not to think what it would feel like to touch that wet, shining nap. “I used to come up here a lot on my own,” Suaj reflected. “But once I started to build my own plane, I spent all my free time on that.” “Such a waste in good weather. I’d be up here all the time, if I had access to a plane.” “You’ll have to come up with some kind of sunscreen if you plan to swim in the daytime. Such pale skin.” “If I spend any time out of the shade, it won’t be pale any more.” To make his point he buried himself deeper under cover. He should be making sunscreen. They had it down to a fine art on Tuzax, of course. “You don’t burn at all.” “No. Though as you say, fur and sand is a terrible combination. I enjoy swimming but it’s nothing compared to flying.” “True. Powered flight isn’t the same as having wings, is it?” Suaj flinched. “Hang gliding is the closest, but I’ve been forbidden from doing it while I work for the army. Something about not wanting their best and brightest dashing their brains out on the ground for amusement.” “How unreasonable of them. At least they let you fly.” “A compromise. But it’s not the only one I have to make.” “I guess my life’s going to be a series of compromises too. I can’t really see past the next task, the next project. I can’t imagine growing old here. Having a relationship with someone. Being part of the society. I don’t feel entitled to that. I feel that I want to make amends to the Angels somehow, but I can’t imagine what I can do that they would want.”
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“There isn’t anything, except to leave them alone. The truth is that your crimes will weigh lightly on the hearts and minds of almost all human Quarnians. Most of them would understand why you did what you did, and they’d have little empathy with the Angels’ grief. I’ve found humans to be very bad at placing themselves in the shoes—or wings—of nonhumans. Or what they perceive as nonhuman. On that score, you’ll have no difficulty making your place in our society. Less than me, in fact.” “I don’t understand.” “My telepathy. It’s a far greater barrier than this.” He ran his hand down his furry arm. “Humans obsess about my learning their sordid thoughts without giving any care to how I feel to be gifted with them. It’s been quite relaxing being around you with your shields—though if you don’t want me to know your fantasies, you might want to work on strengthening them a little.” Raelne flushed. “I don’t mean anything by them.” Suaj tapped his forehead. “Yes, I know. But now all you’ll be able to think about is that I read your mind. People don’t realise how uninteresting they are to me. It’s about as fascinating as inspecting the contents of their bowels.” “You can’t turn it off?” “Only with distance. Another reason I love to fly. It’s so quiet.” “It is. I love the sense of endlessness of it.” “Space must be even more so.” “But then it becomes scary. You lose all familiar landmarks. It’s beautiful, but terrifying. I’m not actually all that experienced with space travel. This was only my second trip into hyperspace. If I’d had a free choice, I’d never have gone, but I was ordered to, and that was that.” “Which makes it harder to accept all that’s happened.” “Yeah.” They sipped their drinks in companionable silence. Of all the people Raelne knew on this planet, Suaj was probably the easiest to be with, and despite his occasional pointed remarks about the manner of Raelne’s coming to work with him, he tended not to make
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personal judgements or comments. Not because he was too polite to express them—Suaj wasn’t that polite to anyone—but because as a scientist, he preferred to collect all his facts before making an assessment. It was a rare and valuable trait. Two of the younger technicians came over to chat and drink beer with them, and gradually the others drifted over for an impromptu question-and-answer session. The conversation inevitably kept returning to Tuzax and their more advanced technology, but Raelne, cushioned by beer and congenial company, didn’t find it as hard as it might have been the day before. He noticed Suaj occasionally steering the discussion away from something a bit too close to the bone, which he appreciated, but he was doing better than expected. At least for now. As the sun went lower in the sky, he felt he could risk a swim, and Suaj joined him. Raelne with his heavier musculature and bare skin swam better than his companion, but it wasn’t about competing. It was about being on holiday, enjoying weightlessness, enjoying different, fresher sensations than he’d indulged in for a very long time, and never on this planet that he would now have to call home. Some of the engineers had spent an hour or so fishing farther down the beach, and their success meant supper was fish cooked on an open fire on the sand, with the remains of lunch filling in the gaps. The cool breeze that came up at sunset meant they had to pull their clothes back on over sandy bodies, but there was something decadent and freeing about eating food hauled straight from the sea in front of them, cooked in the most primitive manner, and with nothing but the sun-warmed sand to keep their feet cosy as they ate. “I could live here,” Raelne murmured as he lay back on his elbows, watching the flames leap and shoot little bright fizzes as the salt in the wood caught. “Right here, on the beach, fishing, sleeping, camping out.” “Inactivity would pall. Don’t forget the winter.” Raelne shuddered. “Damn, you had to remind me. But this is perfection.” “Yes. You see, there are things to enjoy here.” “Yes. But it’s awfully lonely.”
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Suaj looked around them. “Doesn’t have to be.” His tone seemed kind. Despite the fire, it grew too cool an hour or so after sunset to make remaining outdoors entirely comfortable, and as Raelne and Suaj were flying the next day, it seemed best to call it a night. Their accommodation was a tidy little guest cottage not far from the beach, and overlooking it. Suaj asked to shower first, complaining that he’d have to wait for his fur to dry before he could brush it clean. Raelne emerged from his own ablutions to find his companion on the small porch that looked eastwards towards the dark ocean. Suaj, only wearing underpants, sat on a chair and wiped disconsolately at his calves with a small towel, using it and the breeze to hasten the drying. “I’ll be cleaning this out until midnight.” “Uh. You said I should do it.” Suaj stared at him so long, Raelne was certain he was about to be berated for his crassness. But finally Suaj nodded. “There’s a brush in my toiletry bag, if you wish.” Raelne nearly asked, “Are you sure?” but knew that would annoy the man, so he went inside and fetched the brush. Suaj was leaning back on the old wooden chair, apparently quite relaxed at the prospect of being groomed by someone he professed to dislike. “You may start with my upper arms. They’re driest.” Still feeling he was being set up for a joke or a telling off, Raelne stroked the brush down Suaj’s left arm. Self-conscious at first, he soon left that behind, lost in the lushness of the fur and the fascinating way it shone in the yellow porch light. He finished one arm and Suaj presented the other without a word, then his back, his chest and finally his legs. All without commenting, or twitching, or in any way indicating how he felt about this sudden change in their interactions. He kept his eyes closed almost the entire time. The leg fur took a lot of brushing and Raelne was determined to remove every grain of sand. It was over an hour before he completed the job to his satisfaction. There was, of course, one area he didn’t touch, though his hands, seduced by the elegance of the long thighs, had slid dangerously close to the hem of Suaj’s underwear.
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“I can attend to my groin and backside,” Suaj said calmly. “Unless you’d like to.” Raelne stood and backed off, holding his hands up. “Okay, now this is too strange. Where are you going with this?” Suaj looked up at him. “I’m sure you know.” “You don’t even like me.” “Not true, in fact, but my offer is nothing to do with like or dislike. I merely wanted you to have an opportunity to sate your understandable curiosity, and since you’re clearly sexually attracted to me, I thought you might like to use this time to explore that while we’re both away from the base.” “I’m not into casual sex, and you know damn well that if we sleep together, it’ll change our relationship, whether that’s as friends or colleagues or whatever. I might be lonely, but I’m not desperate. I don’t want pity from you or anyone. A vacation’s great, but you don’t need to do this to keep me from going crazy.” “I assure you, that wasn’t my intention.” “Do you want me? Even a little?” Suaj folded his arms. “Let’s just say, I have my own curiosity. You’re not entirely lacking in attractiveness.” He smiled to take the bite out of the blunt words. “It wouldn’t be an act of pity.” “But you don’t care for me in that way.” “I’d be lying if I said my emotions were engaged to the extent you consider necessary. But you’re wrong to think I dislike you. I’ve come to admire you and respect you. You have a sympathetic soul and a pleasing intellect. You’ve displayed quite remarkable altruism and bravery, and you’ve dealt with your situation with grace. No, Raelne, I don’t dislike you. I was rather stung when you said I wasn’t a friend. It may have been true, but I was still stung.” “I only said that because of what you said on the train.” “Which was many months ago. We, the situation, events—all have moved on. If you don’t wish to consider me a friend for your own reasons, so be it. But please don’t refrain because of my imagined hostility.”
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Raelne smiled rather uncertainly. “I wish you’d said this after Fane died. I needed a friend then.” “I know. But at the same time, you were in a difficult emotional situation and quite guarded. To impose, to intrude, would have been graceless. You’d have seen it as pity.” “You really want to sleep with me?” Suaj shrugged. “It won’t keep me awake tonight if we don’t. But I do need to groom my private parts regardless.” He held his hand out for the brush. “You’re right. It would change our relationship. If we can be friends, then I’m more than satisfied.” “I’d like that. Really like it.” He held out his empty hand, and Suaj stared at it, apparently confused. “Uh, I was offering to shake…” “Ah.” Suaj clasped Raelne’s hand with his own, his skin warm and inky black against Raelne’s paleness. “Welcome to my planet, Rael. You needn’t be alone, unless you choose to.” “Thank you. It means more than you realise.” Suaj smiled and let go. “I really do need to brush my bottom.” Raelne laughed and gave him the brush. “Yeah, you probably do. See you inside.” Suaj could see in the dark, so Raelne turned the bedroom light off and did his best to feign sleep before his companion—his friend—came inside. But there was no chance of real sleep, not with the surprises of this evening, and the revelations. Suaj’s words had warmed his heart to the core, all the more because the man simply didn’t go in for false praise or insincere compliments. The most one could expect from him was silence in the face of something he disliked, but he was more than happy to let fly, as Raelne had experienced. How had he not noticed that Suaj had softened his attitude? Perhaps he had, but was reluctant to admit it, unwilling to bring more disdain upon himself. He couldn’t cope with any more pain right now. But sex…
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He wanted the man, and now he knew it was reciprocated, he couldn’t stop thinking about it. The fur had been so…and under it, the wiry muscles. Suaj’s lean features held a fascination too. What would his mouth feel like? Taste like? “If it would help, we could just do it, you know.” Raelne jumped. “How can you read my mind?” “Since your friend’s death, your shields have been prone to slip under stress. I did warn you.” “Oh. Sex would be a bad idea.” “Yes, it would. So let’s not speak of it again. If you want a substitute, I believe Leke has dreams of building our first mass-transit aircraft. And he wants you to design it.” Raelne’s imagination immediately leapt on the idea. “How many people?” “Up to a hundred. For troop carriage. See? Much more fascinating than sex.” “Not as much fun.” “Not to me. Get some sleep, my friend.” Raelne smiled into the darkness. “Good night.”
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Chapter Nine
He slept the best he had since before Fane’s death, and rose eager and excited at the prospect of the next leg of their travel. It took them over the sea and to another coastal base. Then they turned inland for a way, crossing mountains and rivers, vast plains of grass and herds of grazing animals. So many of his fellow graduates had been excited about the prospect of space travel, but Raelne had always preferred terrestrial exploration. This wasn’t exactly unexplored territory, but he was the first Tuzai to lay eyes on it, and even if no one would ever know or care back home, that fact meant something to him. Though they flew thousands of quen and visited eight different bases over those two weeks, there was always time to land by a particularly scenic river or fly low over a herd of rejers to see them wheel in a great cloud of dust away from the strange noise. To stop and consider a flat and inviting area as a suitable place for a new airfield, or to explore the way the land tilted away from old geological faults, and wonder if that would affect plans for diesel storage tanks. Their conversations were much as before. Raelne still didn’t want to talk about Tuzax, and Suaj was, as ever, reluctant to discuss anything personal. But knowing that he wasn’t just a chore to the man let Raelne relax and enjoy Suaj’s company without any sense of restraint. He allowed himself to take a simple pleasure in being with someone who liked him, knowing that he didn’t have to work to win tolerance as he’d thought he had to before. The time sped away too fast, and to his regret, he realised they were coming to the end of a time that had been precious to him. Being marooned still ached, and his homesickness was by no means dissipated, but it had dulled, overlain with new prospects and excitement, with the thought that he had a future here, even if it wasn’t what he’d
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imagined. He could, in time, be happy, and that knowledge made it possible to go on hopefully. The last night was back at the Sern airfield. They arrived early enough to be offered steaks and beer from the team’s stores, and after sharing tea and one last lively discussion about jet propulsion, Raelne and Suaj took their food and drink down to the beach for a cook out, just the two of them. Raelne took a primitive delight in laying the fire and setting the driftwood alight. Suaj designated himself the cook, roasting vegetables and the meat on a metal grille as if he did this every night, instead of a couple of times a year at most. Sipping a beer, Raelne was content to watch him work. The cooking food sent mouth-watering aromas through the humid, sea-scented air, and the flames cast weird light and long shadows on the white sand. “I think I’m going to ask for my own beach as my price,” he declared, accepting a plate of food from his friend. “Oh yes? This one?” “This very one. And the cabin. I’ll let other people use it when I’m not here, of course.” “Of course. Very generous of you.” Suaj grinned. “May I be permitted to use it occasionally?” “Hmmm. Are you prepared to cook?” “I could be persuaded.” “Done. My beach, your cooking. Who could want more?” “You’re forgetting my plane.” “You’re forgetting you offered to let me build one of my own. I’ll be able to come up here any time I like.” “On your own?” “Maybe it’s more fun with two.” Suaj saluted him with his beer bottle. “Indeed.”
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He’d had such an appetite on this trip. Odd, when food normally didn’t interest him, and lately had been a real chore to prepare and eat. But just as on the first visit here, he was ravenous, and when he’d realised how much he’d eaten, he almost felt embarrassed. But Suaj’s skinny belly bulged slightly too. The man had packed away near half a sak of meat on his own, on top of bread and vegetables and the single bottle of beer they’d agreed to limit themselves to since they were flying out at dawn. Raelne hadn’t much of a head for it any more. Drinking wasn’t a big feature of Quarnian society, and the sickly sweet wine used at celebrations was the strongest beverage available. He’d become resigned to the idea of tea being his drug of choice most of the time. The weather had gradually warmed up, coming into this hemisphere’s summer, and even now, the air was sticky. Raelne had stripped off his shirt, only to discover that flying insects had increased in number along with the temperature and were undeterred by the wood smoke. “Bloody things.” He slapped another one of the damn bugs. “I’m going for a swim.” “Do you think that’s wise?” “I won’t go above my waist. I just want to wash off the sweat and cool down before we hit the sack.” “I’ll join you. It’d be a shame for you to drown before you went back to work.” Raelne sniffed in disgust. “You’re a callous bastard sometimes.” “Realistic.” Suaj built up the fire, then stripped down to his underwear. He paused. “Do you mind if I take these off?” “No,” Raelne said casually, slipping his own clothes off and very carefully not staring. Fur was one thing, genitalia quite another. He didn’t even look to see if Suaj was checking him out. The water in the shallows was blood warm, and so calm, it was like swimming in a huge bathtub. The moons had risen, so he could see well enough. Mindful of the dangers and his very slight intoxication, he kept the campfire in his line of sight, and close to the white flash that was Suaj as he dipped in and out of the black water. Suaj’s fur seemed to
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glow in the moonlight. His face and hands disappeared against the water, so he seemed hardly human at all. More like some huge alien fish. While Suaj, taking advantage of his superior night sight, swam off on a secret mission of his own devising, Raelne floated on his back and stared up at the starry night, the alien moons. They always looked wrong, and yet he couldn’t deny their beauty— A wave of water hit him in the face and he spluttered, coming to a standing position. “You bastard,” he yelled as a laughing Suaj swam out of the reach of his revenge. “I was enjoying myself!” “You were falling asleep. I merely woke you.” “Lying bugger. Come here so I can splash you back.” “Catch me, pale human.” Suaj was light and lithe, but Raelne was stronger and, moreover, motivated. Suaj was too easy to see for his own good, and his fur created a fatal drag that allowed Raelne, even full of food and beer, to catch up and grab the annoying creature in less than a minute. He held Suaj’s arm firmly and tipped a scornful handful of water on his friend’s head. “There.” “I’m crushed.” Didn’t look like he was, since he was grinning from ear to ear. “I figured drowning you wouldn’t make me popular. Well, maybe with some of the team.” “Oh?” Raelne arched an eyebrow. “You’re the mindreader.” “Yes. So I know you’re a liar. Pale human.” “Knock it off, furball.” “No need to be nasty.” Then Suaj stuck his tongue out. Now, that should have been a clue that maybe Suaj was just a little too relaxed for his own good, and therefore not in his right mind, but though Raelne knew this intellectually, all he could focus on was that tongue, and the lips glistening in the moonlight. “You said we shouldn’t talk about this again,” he whispered, raising his hand to Suaj’s face.
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Suaj stared down at him. “Why waste time talking?” Then he bent and kissed Raelne, his mouth salty and warm, his tongue decisively slipping between Raelne’s lips. No hesitation, no apology. He knew what he was doing. Raelne tugged him close and wrapped his arms around him, cupping Suaj’s head and demanding more of his lips and that inquisitive tongue. Suaj’s erection pressed against his stomach, hot against his wet flesh. “I want you. It’s not curiosity.” “No. I want this too.” Suaj reached down and seized Raelne’s cock, giving it a firm stroke. Raelne jerked in pleasure, then found Suaj’s erection, a slim rigid length with a smaller crown than his own, but easily as sensitive. Suaj’s mouth continued to plunder his, one hand entangled fiercely in Raelne’s hair while his other hand kept up a determined rhythm on Raelne’s cock. Raelne held Suaj’s head close, the better to gain access to more of those demanding kisses, as his hand explored the delicious differences between their bodies, the sensual feel of Suaj’s furry balls, the eager responses of Suaj’s prick. To have his man under his hands was even sweeter than flying, the rush of pure joy higher and brighter and more thrilling, the sense of controlling something wild and beautiful greater and intensely amazing to him. Fear too, that like the silvery sea creature the moonlight made him appear, he could slip so easily away. Raelne held on tight, desiring and afraid, because he could not bear to lose what had come so deliciously, so willingly into his grasp. Suaj writhed and strained, like a tethered bird of prey, and arched back as he came, staring up at the sky, his mouth open in silent ecstasy. Raelne covered Suaj’s hand on his cock with his own, and together they stroked him to his heady climax, his cock pulsing out his seed to be washed away in the warm sea. Suaj seized his mouth again, as if he was determined to work them back up to a second orgasm, but in a few moments, he relaxed, simply holding Raelne close against wet, velvety fur. “It’s been a while.” “Yeah, for me too.”
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They submerged to their shoulders, the water a gentle caress over sensitised skin. As Suaj’s mouth claimed him, his hands roved carefully over Raelne’s bare skin. “Do you like it?” Raelne whispered as Suaj played with a nipple, apparently fascinated by its shape and texture. “It’s…strange. Almost repulsive to look at, but to touch…it’s soft.” “Not entirely lacking in attractiveness, then?” “Indeed not.” Raelne did a little exploring of his own even as he twitched and laughed under Suaj’s relentless touches. He found the place under the fur where Suaj’s wings had been amputated, sad little bony bumps under his shoulder blades. Suaj gasped a little as Raelne ran his finger over them. “Oh. Are they sore? Oversensitive?” “No…actually it’s…rather nice. Again?” He shuddered as Raelne obeyed. “I thought you wouldn’t want to be reminded.” “I don’t. But I never realised they could still give me pleasure.” Suaj’s kiss deepened, his hands gripping Raelne’s shoulders almost painfully. “Thank you.” Raelne circled his finger around the stump again. “Any time.” They clung together for some time, kissing, fondling, occasionally swimming lazily side by side because the water sliding over their bodies was nice. But after a half hour or so, a breeze began to build, which Raelne found unpleasantly cold on his face. “Shall we get out?” They walked hand in hand out of the water, and kissed again on the beach. Raelne would have tugged Suaj down onto the warm sand, but Suaj reminded him. “Fur. Sand. Hours of brushing.” “Oh yeah. And I’ve got better things to do with you.” Things like watching the way soap and water slid down Suaj’s fur like silk, and the way he arched and groaned with pleasure as Raelne pressed him against the shower’s wall and sucked him off. Things like the way Suaj rubbed his thigh against Raelne’s balls until he almost came from the slippery glide of flesh and fur, and the delicious, unique
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sensation of Suaj’s nails, pinpoints of precise pressure dragged across Raelne’s nipples and his back. And discovering how sweet it was to have Suaj’s soft furred head tucked against his shoulder as they lay in bed, Raelne lazily stroking his fingers along his flank, occasionally skirting lightly over the wing stumps. It made him strangely happy to give joy from what had caused shame and anger. Nothing could replace the wings, but if Suaj could find some peace over their loss, Raelne would count that a victory. “I want to do this again. This isn’t a casual thing for me. Tell me now if you feel differently, and we’ll end it.” “No. I want this. I hoped you would change your mind but it had to be your decision.” “It is. I want it. I want you.” “We can’t let this affect our working relationship. We can’t be other than colleagues on duty. It’s unfair on the team.” “Yeah. You’re not the first, uh, working partner I’ve, you know…” “Ah. So you make a habit of it.” Raelne poked him. “No, I bloody well do not and you know it. Stop being a pain in the arse. I’m a professional, same as you. No one needs to know, if you don’t want them to.” “I see no reason to make it a secret, nor to advertise it. If someone asks, I’ll tell them. If they don’t, I won’t.” “That’s fair. What changed your mind?” “The others who were fascinated by my appearance weren’t interested in me. Other than as a bedmate, I had no appeal. You respond to me as a person. My physical attributes aren’t the only things that draw me to you.” “It never is. I grew out of the ‘screw anyone who’s willing’ phase before I turned twenty.” “Joese hasn’t.”
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“But I’m picky,” he said, which made Suaj laugh quietly against his neck. “I wish we weren’t going back tomorrow.” “We can come up here again. Having someone with me will make it so much more appealing. We’ll always have more work than we can handle. It’s important to remember there’s more to life. Like planes.” “You’re wrong about them being more fun than sex, though.” Suaj licked him under his jaw, making his skin tingle. “Your arguments are most persuasive, Mister Kine. But I need more convincing.” “I think I can come up with a few more ‘persuasions’, Mister Suaj.”
He was half-afraid that a sober Suaj would reject him come the morning, but a sleepy kiss and full-body hug as the dawn light peeked through the tatty curtains, told him that his friend had no regrets at all. Didn’t mean their relationship would weather the return to work, but didn’t mean it wouldn’t either. They held hands most of the flight back and stole a couple of kisses when it was safe, but other than that, it was business as usual. Back at the base, he thought he could just dump his bags at his house and go into the workshop, but it turned out Commandant Hedike had other ideas. Raelne found a polite note ordering him to present himself to the medical centre immediately upon his return for a checkup, and then to come to speak to the commandant himself, with Suaj in attendance. So while Suaj dropped in at the workshop, Raelne had to haul his arse all the way across the base to the medical centre, to be poked and prodded and told what he already knew—that he was doing fine, and ready to go back to work. “A word of warning, though, Mister Kine. The vacation isn’t enough. You must make sure you make time for friends and relaxation,” the doctor warned him, before scribbling on his notes. “I, uh, think I’ve got that covered,” Raelne said, then dashed out before his flush gave him away.
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Suaj was waiting for him outside. “The teams have done surprisingly well in our absence. Perhaps we should go away more often.” “Suits me. Let’s get this thing with Hedike over and done with. I’ve got so many ideas I want to start work on.” The commandant was warm in his welcome, and delighted that Raelne looked so well and was so cheerful. Raelne remembered to thank the man for making him take the time off. “You’re welcome, Mister Kine. However, I didn’t ask you to come all the way over here just to see how you were doing. While you were away, Mister Joese came up with a proposition, and after giving it consideration, I’m happy to support it. But only with your consent, since it may have a strong impact on you.” “Go on, sir.” What the hell Harnol was up to now? “Mister Joese says that while your spacecraft is unable to transport either of you home, with minor modifications it would act perfectly well as an unmanned drone, and could be returned to Tuzax without needing a crew. He also says that he believes your government might be willing to send engineers and scientists to work with us for limited periods, if they could be assured of returning, and if we were to offer other incentives.” “Such as?” Suaj asked. Hedike coughed. “Such as Angel DNA.” “That’s unacceptable,” Suaj snapped. “Wait, wait. He’s talking about semen, not infants. Apparently the spaceship has collection facilities and could take a decent sample back. The promise of more might be enough to induce the Tuzai government to offer assistance. I felt we’d gain more than we’d lose from such a proposal. Suaj, I know you find that distasteful but surely their population deserves a chance to survive, just as ours did.” Raelne could almost see Suaj’s hackles rising. “They sent thieves and murderers to take children. They slaughtered five Angels. Sending semen would reward this behaviour.”
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“I might be a thief but we never intended to be murderers, Suaj.” Raelne was unable to meet his lover’s eyes. “I know it looks like a reward, but think of what Tuzax could offer you. You might even find that some scientists would be prepared to settle here, as Harnol is ready to.” “Your planet needs your scientists as much as we do.” Suaj’s tone was still icy. “In some industries, yes, but there are a few theoretical researchers who are having trouble finding funding because the focus is on practical applications. It’s worth a try. If we strip the Opil of everything you could possibly use, you’ve already got her entire databank—the vessel itself won’t be of any use to you because of the power-supply problem.” “We could use it for study.” “You’ve got all the specifications and data. Your planet doesn’t need deep-space exploration any more. It needs what we’ve just spent two weeks looking at—terrestrial transport, practical solutions to the problems of distance. The Opil has already given you everything you need in that respect.” Suaj didn’t respond, so Raelne looked at Hedike. “Sir, will the Angels be even interested after what we did?” The man nodded. “It’ll need some delicate negotiations, certainly, so it may not happen. However, apparently there’s a young man who’s taken up with one of the Angels and gone to live with them, albeit illegally. Our contact in Getake believes this man could be persuaded to act as a liaison, in return for an amnesty concerning his illicit contacts.” Suaj made a peculiar noise at that news, but when Raelne glanced at him, he found the man’s expression blank and uninformative. “Sir, I have no objections. If I can send a message back home with the sample, I’d be grateful. Other than that, I see it as an opportunity. I respect Suaj’s right to disagree, and will go with whatever you decide between you.” “Thank you,” Hedike said. “Then I’ll put it further up the line and see what can be arranged. Suaj, if you want to detail any objections—” “No, sir.”
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Raelne and Hedike both stared at Suaj’s implacable expression. “Ah, then,” Hedike said. “Very well. Thank you both for coming over. Don’t be in a rush to go back to work, Mister Kine. You’ve earned a break.” “Thank you, but I’m ready to get back to it.” Hedike dismissed them, and Raelne followed a stony-faced Suaj outside. “Do you really think I’m a murderer?” “Technically…no, not you personally. But your team? Yes. This is obscene, Rael.” “The Angels will say no and that’ll be that. If they say yes, then…we should send the ship back anyway, and ask for help. It’s only a slim chance, but they might send people and a ship…” “And then you can go home.” “Uh, yeah. You know that’s still my biggest wish.” He moved closer to Suaj’s side. “But if it doesn’t happen, it won’t break my heart. You know why.” “Your desire to return is natural. I don’t hold it against you.” “Then could you stop scowling at me? It’s not like this was my idea. The benefits go both ways.” “Not for the Angels. We’ve exploited them enough.” “If it makes you any happier, I’ll refuse to do any work on this project if it happens. But Hedike has more to consider than your feelings.” “Yes. Which is why I raised no objections in the end. I just…loathe the idea. But emotional responses don’t belong in such decision-making.” Raelne smiled. “You know, much as I hate the fact you can be a cold-hearted bastard, you’ve always been a fair one. Not to mention pretty.” Suaj narrowed his eyes. “If you want to get lucky any time in the next six months, don’t use the word ‘pretty’ to describe me or any part of me.” “Okay, my little furball.” Suaj bared his teeth in annoyance and Raelne grinned. “We need to get back to work. Try not to rip Harnol’s head off his neck in the first five minutes, all right?”
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Harnol came rushing up to them as they walked into the shop. Suaj stalked off without a word of greeting or explanation. Harnol jerked his thumb in Suaj’s direction. “What the hell is wrong with him?” “Your drone plan doesn’t sit well with him. If you want to work with Suaj in the future, I suggest you don’t talk to him about it and don’t draw too much attention to it.” Harnol stared towards Suaj’s office, clearly puzzled. “Okay. You don’t mind, though?” “It makes sense. More sense than the Opil just sitting there unused and unusable.” “That’s what I thought, man, and there’s a chance we could still go home, if the government sends a ship back.” “Don’t get your hopes up too much. They might not want to let any more of our people come here, considering we’ve lost four of our team.” “Different circumstances,” Harnol said cheerfully. “Like I’ve said before, I don’t care. But you were hit so hard by the news…” He peered at Raelne. “You look a lot better. A lot less stressed. Good vacation, was it?” “It was great. I’m ready to get back to work. So what’s been happening?” Suaj kept away from him all afternoon. Raelne didn’t really know how to take that— was he still angry about Harnol’s plan? Reassessing the whole lover thing? He tried not to overthink it, but Suaj was quite unlike anyone he’d ever been in a relationship with. Since exactly what their relationship was still had to be settled, Raelne had very few markers to guide him. He tried not to show how relieved he was as Suaj swung by his workbench at the end of the working day. “I was thinking of eating in the mess. Care to join me?” Raelne smiled. “Sure. My larder’s empty, I think.” “Then clean up and let’s go.” The offer had been made openly, casually. Everyone knew where the two of them were headed, but why not? Two friends and workmates who’d just been on vacation together might naturally want to spend a little more time together. It would look more odd if they avoided each other.
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“How are you feeling, being back?” Suaj asked as they strolled towards the mess. “Just fine. I feel energised.” “And about being stranded?” “I’m getting used to the idea. You were right. I needed the break. And I needed the company,” he added in a low voice, just for Suaj’s ears. Suaj smiled a little. “As did I.” The mess was popular—one reason Raelne tended to avoid it—and the two of them walking in together drew plenty of stares and some almost inaudible comments which he chose to ignore. It wasn’t exactly a secret to him that some of the officers heartily disapproved of his presence and his courtesy rank, and of having a convicted criminal around them. But he followed Suaj’s lead and paid no attention to them, taking a table in the back corner and ordering a hearty meal. His appetite hadn’t deserted him—at least, not yet. As Suaj turned to speak to the waiter, Raelne noticed something about his neck, and when they were alone again, he whispered, “Did you forget to shave?” There were short white hairs just peeking through the black skin. “No. I’ve decided not to bother any more. You’re right. Why pander to their prejudices? I am what I am, just as you are. It makes insufficient difference to their attitude to me, and it’s a nuisance.” “I’m glad. How long will it take to grow back? I can’t wait to…” Suaj grinned. “I’m sure you can’t. Two weeks or so. My hands will take longer. Please don’t follow my lead. Your beard is hideous.” “That it is, and I’d hate to give you beard burn.” “Depends on how you do that, doesn’t it?” Raelne smiled. He hadn’t expected Suaj to be so frank, talking about that side of whatever this was they had, but when had the man ever not been honest? It reminded him of his friendship with Fane, and he missed the old man afresh, though he’d have surely disapproved of this development.
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They walked back together towards their quarters. “Your place or mine?” Suaj asked calmly, and the fact he took it for granted they’d be spending the night together thoroughly killed all Raelne’s remaining, foolish uncertainty. “Yours? I’ve never seen it.” “It’s unexciting, I assure you.” Maybe, but it was far more of a home than Raelne’s place. Hundreds of books in shelves all around the walls, photos and prints of planes, and a handsome model aircraft took pride of place on a shelf of its own. He carefully lifted it to examine it. The work was amazingly detailed. “Did you make this?” “When I was younger. Now I make the real thing. Tea?” “No. Kiss first, then tea. I’ve had to restrain myself.” Suaj willingly obeyed, his warm body in Raelne’s arms feeling good and right. “Wanted to touch you all afternoon,” Raelne whispered huskily. “I, too, regretted that we were at work, for that reason alone.” Raelne kept his arms around Suaj’s waist as he made tea. “How long have you lived here?” “Six years. I could of course live off base but why would I? It would just add to my travel time.” “I don’t mind it but the army types hate me.” “Inevitable. Many don’t like civilians on base. Not all, though. Hedike’s an exception, and there are others. Don’t allow it to concern you.” “Right now, I’m only concerned with how long this tea will take to make because I’ve got plans.” “I was counting on that. But tea first. I must keep my fluids up.”
The next day, Suaj wore a short-sleeved shirt to work. Everyone had a good look but Harnol was the only one crass enough to comment. “Holy Zoka, so that’s what you’ve been hiding!”
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“Bloody hell, Harnol, have some damn tact,” Raelne muttered. “You are hardly in a position to draw attention to someone else’s physical appearance, Mister Joese, though I understand how, being so lacking in hair, you might find me noteworthy.” Then Suaj smiled, showing his pointed teeth. Harnol flushed and turned away. Raelne grinned. Harnol’s baldness was a sore point for the man, and Suaj knew it. “Little bitch,” Raelne murmured as he passed Suaj’s workbench later. “I thought I was rather restrained, actually.” “I think I probably love you just a little bit for what you said, though.” Suaj looked up and smiled. “Now that, I’m glad to hear. Back to work, Mister Kine.” Now their residence was permanent, the time pressure eased a little, though the weight of work to be done remained. Suaj was as good as his word, insisting that Raelne and all the staff take proper time off and finish the day’s work at a decent hour. He freely admitted to Raelne his motives were selfish, but Raelne had no problem with spending time alone with Suaj either. In the evenings they talked, ate and made love, and on their rest days, they went out to the airfield and played with aircraft. There was a bit of deserted coastline just an hour’s flight from the airfield which, though it lacked a cabin or any facilities, offered a decent stretch of flat dirt for landing, and as fine a beach as any Raelne had ever seen. The pleasure of swimming in warm seas and making love on the sand outweighed the nuisance of having to brush Suaj’s fur clean, though Suaj enjoyed the grooming, and Raelne adored what usually followed. Harnol spoke little to Raelne about the drone project, though Raelne understood negotiations were being carried out with the Angels through their human intermediary, and it looked hopeful. The only involvement Raelne had was to write letters to the relatives of their dead colleagues, and to his own family, and to assist in the translation of the official government messages to Tuzax. A box of personal mementoes was prepared along with the notes and placed on the ship. It had been agreed the Opil would be sent back anyway, to carry those personal effects and a request for assistance, though without
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the Angel DNA material, even Harnol doubted the Tuzai government would be interested in offering that help. But the Angels, amazingly, were prepared to cooperate, and arrangements were made over the summer to collect semen and bring it back to Polsa. Hedike gave Suaj the news that the material was on its way back, and Suaj told Raelne over supper that night. The planned date of departure was in the first week of autumn. “Still angry?” Raelne asked. Suaj’s nostrils flared. “Yes.” “How’s this for an idea. We’ve only got another month or so before it’ll be too cold to swim. How about we take a long break up at Sern? Say, four whole days, not including departure and arrival. We could give the whole shop the time off.” “And the date would be…?” “When do you think? I don’t want to be there when she takes off. I’m getting used to the idea of staying, but watching that is too masochistic. What do you say?” “Why not? Yes. Good idea. Joese and his girlfriend can deal with it and we can ignore the whole thing, since I’m unable to stop it.” Raelne ruefully shook his head. “You are a champion grudge-holder, aren’t you?” “In certain matters, yes. Are you sure you won’t be needed?” “Checked the autopilot and the flight computer thoroughly weeks ago. Apart from anything else, I really want to go back to that cabin before the winter.” “You just want to talk to Falgo about his new engine.” “And you don’t? I know you, don’t forget, Mister ‘Planes are more fun than sex’.” “Ah. Perhaps I’ve changed my mind a little since then. I would now say that ‘Some planes are more fun than some sex.’” “A statement with which no one can argue, so you’ll always be right.” Suaj bowed his head gracefully in acknowledgement. “You done? Because I’m up for some planebeating sex myself.” “How could I possibly refuse an offer like that?”
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Chapter Ten
Harnol smirked when Raelne told him their plan. “You two going to rock the rafters for four days? Aren’t you bored with it yet?” Two weeks ago Harnol, coming back from the officers’ mess after some function or other to which he’d swung an invitation, had seen Suaj and Raelne kissing on Suaj’s porch. Neither of them cared that he knew, or that it meant the entire engineering section now also knew, but Raelne could have done without the sly remarks and constant innuendo. “I don’t know, Harnol. Aren’t you bored with it?” “Not with Kulil. She’s a goer,” he said, winking. Raelne rolled his eyes. “Hey, if you’re going off with your bit of fluff, then I want a week’s leave.” “Anything, but if Suaj hears you calling him a ‘bit of fluff’ you’ll be eating without your teeth. Isn’t there anyone you respect enough not to insult?” “Not here, no. You go enjoy your dirty weekend with the boss, and I’ll stay here and work my tail off as usual.” “Yeah, right,” Raelne muttered as he walked off. Harnol wasn’t exactly a slacker but the idea of him being the long-suffering hard worker on the team was ridiculous. Kulil, a surprisingly personable young female technician who had the dubious honour of being Harnol’s latest conquest—and far too good for the man, Raelne considered—along with two other assistants, agreed to remain on duty and help Harnol launch the Opil. The entire process was automated and if there was a problem, it could be aborted to await Raelne’s return. He really hoped there wouldn’t be. He just wanted it done without him having to be involved. The DNA material—or “Angel spunk” as Harnol insisted on referring to it, despite Suaj’s very vocal irritation at the term—arrived on schedule two weeks later, and the departure date confirmed. That meant the leave dates could also be confirmed, and three 118
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days before the Opil was due to be launched, Raelne and Suaj flew north, leaving anger, regrets, irritation and Harnol behind them for what they hoped would be a thoroughly enjoyable break. At Sern airfield, Falgo came out to meet them as they taxied in, and when he saw Suaj holding Raelne’s hand, he grinned. “I did wonder about you two. The lads thought they saw something that last night you were up here, but I told them they were imagining things. Congratulations, gentlemen.” “Thank you,” Suaj said politely. “We’re here for a short holiday as you know, but I believe my colleague won’t mind spending a little time talking to you about engine design.” “Because Suaj finds that kind of thing incredibly dull, you see,” Raelne pointed out. Falgo laughed as Suaj turned to Raelne to give him a dirty look. “You’re settling in well, Rael. Come in and have a look at what we’ve been up to.” The days passed in a golden haze of sex, swimming and intense discussions about the planes they would build in time. Raelne was able to mostly put what was happening at the Polsa base to the back of his mind, but on the night before the Opil was to make its one-way journey back to Tuzax, he found he simply couldn’t sleep. He slipped out of bed, and, stealing a spare blanket from the cupboard, went out onto the porch to stare at the moons hanging low over the black ocean, and be miserable without upsetting anyone. “You’re supposed to be getting away from all this, you know. Not wallowing in it.” Raelne turned as the door behind him opened and closed, and Suaj came out, carrying two steaming mugs of tea. His lover handed him a mug and joined him on the steps. “I keep thinking, what if Harnol was wrong about those components? What if we could have found a local equivalent?” “I could radio from here, stop the launch.” Raelne sipped his tea and leaned against Suaj’s deceptive strength. “No. I’m being stupid. Harnol knew how important it was for me to go home, even if he didn’t care. If he’d had the slightest idea that it was possible, he would have at least set me looking for
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what could be used. He knows those engines better than me. His special area was heat tolerance of materials in deep space.” “But yet you doubt.” “What if next week, someone here discovers a metal as good as reuilium? We’ll have pissed away our last chance.” “It’s still possible your government will decide to offer cooperation in return for more DNA.” “Yeah. None of this is logical, Suaj.” He put his arm around Suaj’s narrow waist and held him close. “Guess I’m not as resigned as I thought I was.” “It would be surprising if you were.” He twined his fingers with Raelne’s. “I hope I can help you find reasons to cease regretting, at least in the future.” “You do, you have. I just miss my family. You’re wonderful. But you’re not them.” “No. Strange. I could contemplate being separated from my family with complete equanimity. Ironic that it’s this way around.” “Yeah. You don’t have to sit out here, getting cold. I’ll be all right.” “Undoubtedly. But is it not what a friend does, when his friend is troubled? Is it not what a lover does, Rael?” “Yes, it is. I didn’t mean to…” He turned and kissed Suaj’s cheek, stroked his downy throat. “I wish I could have you without losing them, without having lost Fane and the others. But you’re worth coming all this way to find.” “I too wish you could have come here in a less destructive manner. But I’m glad you did.” “Mushy enough for you?” “More than enough,” Suaj said, smiling slightly. “Drink your tea and come to bed. If you can’t sleep, I’ve got a use for you, Mister Kine.” “Oh, right. I’m on holiday and you want me to work.” “Bitch, bitch, bitch. Soft pale human.” “Quiet, Fluffy.” “I’ll make you pay for that. And you’ll never know when.”
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“I’m shaking in my boots. Wait until I drink my tea, at least.” “Of course. I’m merciful in my vengeance.”
Once the deadline had passed, Raelne relaxed. There was nothing he could do now. The Opil was gone, so were his messages. In a few weeks, his family would know the truth, and everyone would have their closure. Now his job was to get on with his new life, in his new home, and give his new career his very best. With Suaj at his side, it wouldn’t be as hard as it might be. There were plenty of distractions. Falgo, the Sern base’s chief engineer, and Leke at Polsa were well on their way to completing a second prototype for a twelve-seater passenger and cargo plane, the first design proving too inefficient for implementation. A plane of this type would revolutionise communications and trade in the regions. Communication over the vast distances was something that the Quarnian government were greatly interested in improving, but in the cheapest way possible. A network of aircraft, used judiciously, would be a useful adjunct to the train and road capacity. The stumbling block was fuel stores, and that was something that had to be dealt with by government intervention. Suaj believed the will was there, so they would have to wait and see if it all fell into place. As they walked over to the hangar to collect the plane, Falgo came out. “Polsa radioed and wanted confirmation of your ETA, Suaj. Seems there’s a problem there and they want to meet you on the field.” “Did they say what was wrong?” Suaj asked. “Nope. You leaving now?” “Yes. Give them an ETA of four hours. Perhaps I should contact them.” “Didn’t say they wanted you to. Just wanted to know when you’d be back. Didn’t sound like a big deal. They called yesterday to see if you were still up here but they didn’t want to speak to either of you.” “It’ll be something at the workshop,” Raelne told him. “Harnol’s probably got himself into a mess. We’ll find out soon enough and we can’t do anything from here.”
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“No. Very well. See you in the spring, Falgo.” Falgo shook their hands. “If not sooner. Maybe next time you see me, I’ll be flying that cargo plane into Polsa airfield.” Suaj smiled. “I look forward to it. Let’s do preflight, Rael.” It was a slight regret that they wouldn’t do this again for months. Sure they could fly for a few weeks longer, but the winter weather on the coast was stormy and dangerous a lot of the time. He resigned himself to the prospect of a lot of time spent indoors. But then, there was Suaj. It wasn’t all bad. The flight back was uneventful, and most of the time they discussed the plans Falgo had shown them. Raelne wondered on and off what Harnol had screwed up, but doubted it would be anything they couldn’t sort out. “What’s going on?” he asked as they circled the airfield, ready to land. “There are a lot of people down there.” “I don’t know. Concentrate on your approach.” He landed without a single bump—always a point of pride considering how protective Suaj was towards his machine. Automobiles raced towards them as they taxied towards the hangar. “I guess that problem was more of an emergency than Falgo realised.” “So it seems.” Raelne shut down and climbed out of the cockpit. “Hey guys…bloody hell, don’t shoot!” He quickly put his hands up. The dozen or so rifles pointed at him didn’t waver. An officer stepped forward. “Lie on the ground. Now!” Raelne hastily obeyed, even as Suaj snapped, “What’s going on? Explain, someone.” “Suaj, what’s happening?” “Shut up, Kine. You’re under arrest.” Someone snapped cuffs on him and he was hauled to his feet. “Arrested? On what charge? Suaj, help me!” The rifles clicked ominously as Raelne strained towards his lover. “Mister Suaj, step away from the prisoner.”
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“Suaj!” Suaj showed nothing on his face, but his tense posture and clenched hands betrayed his anxiety. “Calm down, Rael. Don’t panic them into firing. I’ll find out what’s happening. Be calm, be reasonable.” He didn’t feel at all reasonable or calm, and the look on the soldiers’ faces didn’t give him any reason for comfort. The soldiers moved between him and Suaj, and he was hustled off to one of the automobiles. Suaj was prevented from following, though last Raelne saw of him, he was talking to the soldiers and doubtless trying to figure out what the hell was going on. The men driving him wouldn’t respond to questions, so he could only try and keep his seat in the jolting vehicle, and hope this was just some administrative mistake. He couldn’t help but wonder if this was something to do with the launch of the Opil, and the certainty that he and Harnol were now well and truly stuck on this planet for the foreseeable future. But why arrest him now, when he had no possible way to escape and no motive to do so? He was driven to the brig and marched to an interview room with which he was wearily familiar from the first days after his arrival on the base. A stern-faced and rather angry-looking captain stormed in and began to yell at him. All he managed to pick up were “Joese” and “Kulil” and “spacecraft”. “Wait! You’re going too fast. My Quarnian’s good, but not that good.” He made an effort to keep his voice low and unthreatening. “Please, repeat your question slowly.” The captain gritted his teeth at him. “I said, what do you know about the kidnap of the Quarnian female, Kulil qel Feer, by your friend, Joese Harnol, and the theft of the spacecraft!” Raelne stared up at the captain in frank disbelief. “Wh-what do I know? Nothing! What are you talking about? I’ve been up at the Sern airfield for the last five days. What happened?” “Joese enticed the woman onto the ship, and while she was there, the spacecraft launched, with the two of them onboard.”
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“No! Holy Zoka, it has to be an accident. They can’t survive on—” The captain slapped the table. “No accident. We discovered Joese has been smuggling supplies onto the ship for weeks, and this was found in your quarters.” He threw a letter onto the table. “We can’t translate more than a few words, but it is clearly addressed to you and a form of farewell. Read it.” Raelne stared at it. “Read it out loud,” the captain insisted. “Uh.” Raelne scanned the words, his Quarnian momentarily deserting him in his dawning fury. “Dear Rael. By now you know I’ve headed home. Sorry to deceive you, man, but this is my big chance to be a hero. I was going to take you back too, but well, it didn’t work out. Face it, you’re the golden boy now, and they love you. I’m tired of being the second stringer, and when I take the DNA back, I’ll be the toast of Tuzax. I know you hate me right about now. Try to see it from my point of view.” He looked up. “I’ll kill him!” “Is that all?” The captain’s expression was perhaps a little less hostile, but since Raelne could be lying, the man was right not to trust him. Damn you, Harnol. “More or less. He says he’ll give my family my letter and return the other personal effects. Big of him,” he added with a sneer. “Take it away before I puke over it.” The captain obeyed. “You truly knew nothing of this?” “Ask Suaj. Ask anyone if I’d have cheerfully let him take my only chance of going home away from me. You said he kidnapped someone? Are you sure she wasn’t duped into going along?” “We don’t know. We’ll never know. You’ll be held in custody until this is investigated further and Mister Suaj is questioned. You won’t be able to see him until that’s finished.” “I understand. I’m sorry. I apologise on behalf of my people.” “Your race has much to apologise for,” the captain said, his expression hard. Raelne was taken to a cell and the cuffs removed, but he was too angry to lie down. He paced, venting his anger by reaching into his extensive store of Tusan and Quarnian insults and cursing Harnol out loud. The Tuzai government would never send another
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ship now. Harnol could spin this however he wanted, but the last thing he’d admit would be that Raelne hadn’t remained on Quarn of his own volition. Maybe the woman would tell the truth, but it depended on how many of Harnol’s lies she believed, and how she was handled when she arrived on Tuzax. If she was treated as a test subject, valuable only for her chimerical DNA, she’d have little interest in helping Raelne. With Harnol as her interpreter, she wouldn’t even be able to get the truth out. Suaj certainly wouldn’t believe Raelne was involved. The man had read his mind, seen his distress. No one could believe Suaj was involved either, surely. But Harnol’s deception cast doubt on everyone and everything now. Hours passed and the longer he stayed in the cell, the more anxious Raelne became. What could be taking so long? Couldn’t Harnol at least have left a message exonerating him? But no. The most he was interested in was making sure Raelne didn’t hate him too much, and even that, he didn’t really care about. Raelne hoped there was a very special area in the icy pits of hell for people who betrayed their colleagues and their race like this. It was sunset before the cell door opened. “You’re free to go,” the captain said. “There is no evidence to press a charge against you.” “But you believe I’m innocent, right?” “On balance it’s more likely that you are than you aren’t.” Raelne resisted pulling a face. He wanted to get out of here and being rude to his captors wasn’t likely to achieve that. He walked outside and squinted into the setting sun. Suaj was waiting for him, leaning against a hitching post. Raelne hesitated. His lover hadn’t even twitched at his arrival. Was he angry? “They said I was free to go. Weren’t exactly unequivocal about my innocence.” “No, they can’t be.” “Uh, you don’t believe I knew about it, do you?” “Did you?” “Of course I didn’t!”
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“Then that’s good enough for me.” Suaj held out his arms and Raelne went to him, kissing him desperately, relieved and a little shaky with reaction. “I was afraid you would think…” “Not for more than a minute. I’m ashamed of that minute.” “Harnol set things up to cast doubt. The note he left was in Tusan. He could have written a simple one in Quarnian, recorded a message, anything. Bastard.” “You can be ruder than that.” “Oh trust me, I have been. Take me home?” Suaj tilted his head questioningly, then took Raelne’s hand and led him to the automobile. Raelne smiled when they ended up outside Suaj’s house. “I’m thirsty, hungry and I need to hold you for about a million years.” “Well, you’re certainly welcome to my normal lifespan,” his pedantic lover agreed. Raelne grinned and let Suaj lead him inside. Tea was the strongest drink on offer, but holding Suaj around the waist while he made it, was better than beer for relaxing Raelne’s shattered nerves. Suaj fed him bread and honey to ease his hunger, and didn’t move more than a xin from Raelne’s side as he ate. “Do you think Kulil was kidnapped or duped?” Raelne asked as he set down his empty plate. “Kidnapped,” Suaj said firmly. “There were no notes left for her family to whom she was devoted, and no indication that her relationship with Joese was of an order to make her give them up and go to a planet where she knew no one but him and nothing of the language.” “Why did he have to take her? Bad enough he screwed me over, but to ruin her life as well?” “Profound self-centeredness, I suspect. He struck me as a man disappointed in the level of appreciation he received in life, both here and on Tuzax. Since he could never be a real hero, he had to confect a reputation.” “And it’ll probably work,” Raelne muttered. He turned and kissed Suaj on the lips, sharing the sweetness on his tongue. “This is what I must have known, subconsciously.
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What was bothering me about the whole thing. Somewhere, my brain was trying to warn me Harnol was up to something.” “Possibly. However, you mustn’t punish yourself for not knowing. He fooled us all. If anyone should have investigated harder, I should have, but I saw no reason to. Looking back, I still see nothing that would have warned me.” “No. But the ‘what ifs’ are going to drive me crazy for a while. Just bear with me.” “Willingly.” Lingering frustration and sadness at being so close to going home, and still missing the chance, drove him out onto Suaj’s small back veranda while his lover cooked their supper. Raelne stared up at the glittering, unfamiliar stars. Alien and yet now to be all he would ever see. Yesterday he’d accepted it. Today… “Damn you, Harnol,” he whispered. “Damn you to hell.” Suaj came out a few minutes later, carrying a tray of steak sandwiches, and despite his emotional turmoil, Raelne fell on them hungrily. They ate in silence, Suaj apparently content to lean against him and just be with him. If Harnol had pulled this trick before Suaj had become his lover, Raelne was sure he’d have gone crazy from the pain of it all. Pulling himself together was as much for Suaj’s sake as his own. “Rael, I want to ask you something. It might make you angry.” “Angrier than I am at Harnol?” “Perhaps not, but I don’t want to quarrel with you.” Raelne put his arm around Suaj and pulled him close. “Ask.” “If you had known of Harnol’s plot, and he’d asked you to go with him, would you have done?” “You mean, steal the Angel DNA like that? No.” “But you’d have gone if you’d known the vessel was space-worthy, in the normal course of things.” “I—” He stopped, looking into Suaj’s eyes and determined to be truthful with himself and with his companion. By the time he and Suaj had become lovers, he’d
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believed all hope was gone of ever going back. The issue of giving up Suaj to go home had never arisen. “Before you and I…yes, you know that.” “And now?” “This is a tad unfair, you know. Since it’s all hypothetical.” “Yes. Forget I asked.” “I can’t, because you want to know.” He sighed and rubbed his face against Suaj’s cheek. “No. Not without you. I can’t say I’d have been thrilled to make that decision, but that’s what it would have been. At least, I think it would. Homesickness hurts. Some days it chokes me so hard I can’t think of anything but missing them. But other days, being with you, I’m happy. That’s about as good as you’ll get from me for a while. I’ve been up and down so much this year, I can’t make promises about how I’ll feel.” “Understood. And thank you.” “Would you have come back with me if I asked?” “I might. But like you, I can’t be completely sure. I would find it very hard to abandon my work here, since there are so few like me who can do it. It’s not about what I feel for you.” “’S fair enough. Now how about you take me to bed and make me forget all about Joese Harnol and spaceships and prison cells.” “Ah. That might take some time, you realise.” Raelne grinned. “Now there’s something I’m definitely sure of—you’re up to the challenge.” “Then come along, Mister Kine, so I may justify your faith in me.” “Make sure you take a long time over it, Suaj.” Raelne picked up Suaj’s hand and kissed the palm. “As long as I have, it’s yours.” “Let’s not waste it, then. I plan to enjoy every moment.” “Of course, my little furball.” He danced away from Suaj’s irritated grab, laughing. Enjoying his work, living his life to the full, and teasing the hell out of his lover. Yes, this was a future to look forward to, indeed.
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About the Author
Ann Somerville is a native of Queensland, Australia and after many years living in London, has returned home and now writes full time. She holds degrees in science, arts and internet technology, has written scholarly articles on several Victorian natural historians, and her partner is a zoologist, so her head is full of occasionally useful knowledge about amazingly useless things. She doesn’t want to ever get to the point where writing becomes work, because she’s having way too much fun with it. To learn more about Ann Somerville, please visit http://logophilos.net/. Send an email to Ann Somerville at
[email protected] or join her Yahoo! group at http://groups.yahoo.com/group/somerville_writing.
Look for these titles by Ann Somerville
Now Available: Interstitial On Wings, Rising
Coming Soon: Many Roads Home
Dinun can’t fly—but he could be the answer to an Angel’s prayer.
On Wings, Rising © 2008 Ann Somerville Book 1 of the Encounters series.
Barely tolerated by his own kind, Dinun is a self-reliant soul who scratches out a living from the great, empty lands of Quarn. Always looking for unexpected treasure, he never dreams of finding an injured Angel. Moon belongs to a race of telepathic winged humanoids. Exquisitely beautiful, sexually playful, Angels have always fascinated humans. Dinun’s feelings for Moon take flight as they become lovers, but a planetary invasion could destroy their future together. Centuries ago, humans on Quarn saved their race from destruction by joining their DNA with that of the Angels. Now full-blood humans are stealing Angel children—including Moon’s son—for barbaric experiments. The full-bloods are prepared to slaughter anyone who gets in their way. Thrust into a desperate race against time to save the infants, Dinun and Moon must battle against a people with weapons far beyond anything the Angels—or their human friends—can hope to defeat. Dinun brings to the fight his bravery and a determination to be true to himself. Will that be enough to save the children, and win the Angel he’s come to love? Warning: This title contains graphic interspecies winged sex and violence. Enjoy the following excerpt for On Wings, Rising: When he brought the second can of warmed water over, Moon carefully extended the wing to make cleaning easier. Now Dinun could appreciate just how long and wide it was, though it folded up to little thicker than Dinun’s arm.
“Beautiful,” he murmured as he wiped the cleaning leather down the silky fur. ::Pleased:: Dinun looked up. “Doesn’t it hurt?” “No. You. Touch.” ::Pleased:: Huh. Knowing that made him rather self-conscious, made him notice the way the fur shone in the afternoon sun, how the skin fluttered each time he stroked it with the leather. When he finally finished and tossed the leather into the bloodied water, ready to empty it away from the camp, he saw a rather more obvious sign of Moon’s enjoyment of the cleaning. The Angel sported a proud and sizeable erection from behind the fold of skin that normally covered his genitals. “Oh. Uh.” Moon covered his cock with his hand. “You. Dislike.” ::Regretful:: “No, no…it’s, uh, impressive. Um, very big. In a good way. Excuse me.” Dinun stood and grabbed the cans of water, bolting over to the stream to dispose of the dirty liquid. “By the spirits,” he breathed as he poured the water from the cans downstream of the collecting point. He reached inside his trousers to adjust himself. It was one thing to give a furtive blowjob or five to the supposedly happily married Kenwil or Rujo behind the stables, or to masturbate in his own bed to memories of men working in the fields, bared to the chest, but he’d never in all his life seen… It had been beautiful. Perfect and long. Dinun wanted to know what it would taste like. What it would be like to kiss Moon or to feel those elegant Angel lips on his own cock—not that he knew what it was like to have anyone’s mouth on his penis, but he had a pretty fertile imagination. Being the only invert—officially at least—in a little settlement like Getake, it was either imagination or nothing. His widowed ma, blessed be her spirit, had explained in her own gentle, nonjudgemental way what Dinun’s embarrassed admissions about not really wanting to have sex with girls meant. That it was normal, and certain men and women were just made that way, which was why their society allowed for provider-partners and same-sex troths. Talking to her, he’d felt good about himself. He was different but not wrong.
But then his ma died of a raging infection in wounds she’d sustained working with an injured bolli, and Dinun had lost one of his staunchest supporters before he’d turned twenty. Sora filled the gap a little way, but their relationship was based on commerce more than affection. Without his mother, Dinun had been exposed to the small-minded censure of a small-minded town. He knew more dirty secrets than he bet old Lopi would ever imagine existed, but officially, he was the only male in town who preferred other men. So what was the Angel doing, exposing himself like that? Offering? Boasting? Having a reaction to the physical stimulus? Moon was perfect, even with the injury. Angels had a reputation for bewitching all who beheld them, and now Dinun understood why. Moon only had to turn that liquid green gaze on him and Dinun felt like doing anything he asked. Not that this was the reason he was helping, Dinun sternly told himself. The fact that he had a big, beautiful… Get a grip. Moon was injured and desperate to find his child. Dallying with someone from a different species…race, at least…was probably the last thing on his mind. Probably. Dinun rinsed out the cans and the leather, and walked back with fresh water. Moon was eyeing the cooking birds on the fire. “You’re hungry?” “Yes. You. Anger.” ::Worried:: “No, I’m okay. I uh…was surprised. Not angry. You didn’t do anything wrong. How do you feel? The wing, I mean.” “Pain. Small.” ::Relieved:: “Good. Here, have some of this.” He set a plate of cooked fowl meat on Moon’s good side so he could eat while Dinun finished dressing and binding the injury. Amazingly, even the burn marks seemed to be fading. All this would have fascinated his mother. Dinun didn’t have the training to describe accurately what was going on. He suspected if he tried, it would sound magical, which wouldn’t endear him to the settlement council.
Moon docilely permitted Dinun to bundle him up in the cleaned doem skin. “Tomorrow. I. Fly.” ::Determined:: “Probably.” He finished fastening the clips to keep the skin secure and turned to find himself almost nose to nose with the Angel. “Uh.” “Dinun.” ::Grateful:: “Uh, you’re welcome.” Moon’s huge eyes seemed to draw him in. Dinun couldn’t make himself look away, but then he jumped as Moon lifted his hand to touch his face. “Dinun. Kin.” ::Pleased:: “I suppose we are. I mean, we have the same skin and your fur’s like my hair—” Moon cut off his nervous babbling by the simple application of his lips. Dinun froze in shock. No one had kissed him before, and certainly not— Moon’s good arm went around him and pulled him closer. Dinun had enough presence of mind not to jostle Moon’s injured side, before he gave himself over completely to the feel of Moon’s firm mouth and eager tongue. Moon tasted of roast meat and something else that was just him. His tongue sliding against Dinun’s made Dinun shiver, and he didn’t know why lips felt so good against his mouth, when he didn’t think his own were that sensitive. It was like…all of it together was a kind of magic. Not just the lips, or the tongue, or Moon’s hands, or the tingle of excitement as Dinun felt the very edge of Moon’s teeth. It was all of it together, until his mind filled with pleasure, his body coming alive, until every touch made him want to climb inside Moon’s skin just to be closer to him. It was nothing like anything he’d imagined before. Ever read about. Even in his loose fitting trousers, Dinun felt a bit cramped, urgently needing relief, and against his stomach, Moon’s erection was hard and insistent with the Angel’s little thrusts making it clear what Moon wanted. But Dinun had never… He slid down Moon’s silky legs until he was face to face with the long slender cock, so dark and perfect. This, he was confident he could do right. He’d had enough practice behind those stinky old stables. Moon stroked Dinun’s face as he sucked, determined to make this the best blowjob he’d ever given. None of the men in the settlement had ever touched him or kissed him,
had even spoken to him as they pushed him to his knees. Moon didn’t speak either but Dinun was immersed in pleasure coming from his companion, assured of his value by the gentle caresses, the intense desire and approval Moon sent in pulses towards him. Dinun stroked behind Moon’s cock where the small, tight balls were hidden by more luscious fur, dared to explore the swell of narrow buttocks and the tight cleft. But it was Moon’s cock that fascinated him. Sweetly shaped and sensitive to the lightest pressure, it responded to every caress, every slight movement, shivering and jumping as Moon shivered and jumped. Dinun thrilled at the reactions he wrought, so different from the stolid grunts and ignorant thrusts of the men in the settlement. Moon came in one tidy, polite spurt and a flute-like vocalisation, shockingly loud after his habitual silence. Dinun swallowed and licked the unfamiliar but not unpleasant taste, resting his head on Moon’s thigh until the Angel got his breathing under control. Then Moon tugged Dinun up again so he could kiss him and pet his earlobe affectionately. “You.” ::Grateful:: “You’re welcome,” Dinun whispered, his voice all husky from emotion. Spirits help him, Moon was beautiful. Moon tugged insistently at Dinun’s pants but didn’t seem to know what to do to release him. Dinun quickly undid his belt and buttons, pulling his erection free. “Please?” His wanton need washed away all embarrassment at being so bold but Moon sent a little wave of admiration at the sight of him, which made Dinun flush hot and feel like a giant among men, all at the same time. Moon kissed him again as he put his hand on Dinun’s cock, Dinun kneeling spreadlegged to give him access. It didn’t matter that this was the only way Dinun had ever come. What mattered was that it was someone else’s hand for once, and a hand of someone who responded to him as a person, not a dirty, secret convenience. Moon’s grip was strong and knowing, his mouth commanding Dinun as his hand stroked Dinun to a quick but powerful climax that left Dinun panting and hungry for…something. Something more, he guessed. The appetite woken in his belly would not be sated with a handjob, but it was more than a start.
Blessed spirits. He’d just had sex with an Angel. He’d just had sex. At the age of twenty-eight, he was no longer a virgin. Mostly not, anyway. He’d had sex with an Angel. Wow.
New lover. New city. New dangers.
The Ballad of Jimothy Redwing © 2008 Maia Strong Wand’ring Minstrel Jimothy Redwing is used to life on the road, living by the words and music that are his stock in trade. While he’s comfortable finding his way alone, he’s always amenable to a friendly stranger who knows the lay of the land. Ricky Lennox is smart, funny, handsome, and very amenable. With a place to stay, a sexy new lover, and some local contacts, Jimothy looks forward to delivering the letters in his care—including a message for the local ruler—and earning a little money with his music before moving on. Ricky’s declaration he’s interested in more than just a one-night tryst starts Jimothy thinking about settling into a life of perfect harmony. But things hit a sour note when he learns his lover’s true identity—and exactly what’s in the epistle to Kanbec’s ruler. Jimothy’s journey turns out to be far more complicated than he could have dreamed, and as dangerous as any epic ballad. For himself—and for Ricky. Warning: This book contains a sexy musician, hot nekkid manlove, violence, and nuns dressed in blue.
Enjoy the following excerpt for The Ballad of Jimothy Redwing: Eventually, with everything piled neatly around him on the floor, Jimothy shook his head. “It’s all here—not that there’s much.” He looked around at his meager belongings. “It would be easy to tell if something were gone.” Even his folded bit of parchment containing his abortive attempt at a new love song was there. He began putting it all back, starting with the pages. He didn’t want Ricky to see them yet. With everything put away, he closed the chest and leaned heavily on it to rise. Ricky reached out his free hand to help him up. “Thanks. I feel like an old man.” “You know,” Ricky said, placing the lantern on the table, “I still owe you that back rub. You could collect now if you like.”
Jimothy was strongly tempted, but shook his head. “My ribs are so sore I don’t think I can hold myself upright much longer tonight, and lying on my stomach just sounds like a bad idea right now.” “I suppose you’re right.” Ricky sat on the edge of the bed and looked around, frowning. “Why would someone break in and not take anything?” “Why would someone mug me without stealing my money?” Jimothy sat next to him. “Who could have gotten up here this evening?” he wondered aloud. “Anyone going to the privy would have had the opportunity.” “But would that give someone enough time to come all the way up here, pick a lock, search a room, relock the door, and come back down without anyone wondering?” Jimothy shook his head. “It is unlikely,” agreed Ricky. “Besides, there are people coming and going from the kitchen constantly. Surely someone would have spoken up if anyone headed upstairs without permission.” “They could have slipped in between the staff. Or it could have been another guest,” mused Ricky as the idea struck him. “Could be. Seems more likely, too, doesn’t it? And there’s only one other guest.” Jimothy fought back a yawn. His mind was spinning, but his body was about worn out. “At least, as far as I know,” he added wearily. “We’ll ask Maeve or Japheth in the morning. You should get some sleep,” advised Ricky, concern in his voice. He wrapped a warm arm around his lover who happily leaned into the embrace. “When there’s the chance someone could break in while I’m asleep?” he argued halfheartedly. “I’m not sure that’s such a good idea.” “You can’t stay awake all night, and there’s no real evidence that anyone was in here.” “What about that healthy paranoia you invoked earlier?” Ricky shrugged, admitting stalemate. “All right,” he admitted. “Still, I’d rather you not be alone tonight. I’ll stay. I’ll have Nita bring some strong tea to keep me awake.”
“No.” Jimothy shook his head and sat up. “I’m not the only one who needs some rest. I see those dark circles under your eyes,” he said, his tone almost scolding. “You should go home. Get some sleep. If the woman in the next room really did break in here, she didn’t find anything. There’s no reason for her to try again.” “Except maybe to finish what those thugs started,” said Ricky darkly. Jimothy shook his head again. “They did their job, and she won’t hurt me. But you–” He hated it, but it had to be said. “There’s no guarantee you’ll be safe if you stay here tonight.” He stood up slowly and, as they talked, he carefully put away his guitar and transferred his night’s earnings from his mug to his purse. “What makes you think you’re safe from her?” “Something she said earlier tonight. She said that a talented musician was valuable to her.” “And you believed her?” Ricky challenged. Jimothy met his lover’s doubtful, worried gaze. “I couldn’t tell you why, but I do believe her, yes.” They stared at one another for several moments. Ricky was the first to relent. “All right. But I’m not leaving you here alone.” Before Jimothy could argue, he went on. “I have an idea.” He rose and took the chair from the table, lodging it carefully under the door handle. Next, he took the bucket of water from beside the brazier and placed it about a foot to one side of the chair, in the path of anyone who might be hoping to sneak into the room. “Satisfied?” Jimothy nodded, yawning. It was a stop-gap solution at best, but he was too tired to argue any more. “I suppose it’ll have to do.” “Good. Do you need anything before we turn in?” “No.” He wearily pulled off his tunic and shirt and couldn’t hide the wince that flashed across his face as he did. “Do not offer me any medicine,” he commanded before Ricky could even open his mouth. “I wasn’t going to,” he protested, but it was clear from his expression that he was lying. “Sit down. Let me help you.” He crossed to the bed and knelt, pulling off each of Jimothy’s boots and setting them to one side.
Jimothy wasn’t such a fool that he didn’t appreciate the help. “Thank you. This is familiar.” A little smile tugged the corner of his mouth. “Yeah. Isn’t it, though?” Ricky looked up at him with a warmth in his pale eyes that was completely unlike the fiery flashes Jimothy had seen there before. Jimothy stood once more, leaning against the bed to keep his balance. He really was exhausted and the fact annoyed him. “You’re frowning,” said Ricky, removing his tunic and shirt and tossing them aside. “I’m annoyed.” “About what?” He pulled off his boots and set them next to Jimothy’s. “It doesn’t matter.” Jimothy hated being helpless. And helpless is exactly how I feel. He undid the lacing of his pants, but strong hands reached out and stopped him. He met Ricky’s blue gaze, and the other man smiled. “Let me.”
When Sam Raintree goes to work for Bay City Paranormal Investigations, he expects his quiet life to change—he doesn’t expect to put his life and sanity on the line, or to fall for a man he can never have.
Oleander House © 2006 Ally Blue Book One in the Bay City Paranormal Investigation series.
Sam Raintree has never been normal. All his life, he’s experienced things he can’t explain. Things that have colored his view of the world and of himself. So taking a job as a paranormal investigator seems like a perfect fit. His new co-workers, he figures, don’t have to know he’s gay. When Sam arrives at Oleander House, the site of his first assignment with Bay City Paranormal Investigations, nothing is what he expected. The repetitive yet exciting work, the unusual and violent history of the house, the intensely erotic and terrifying dreams which plague his sleep. But the most unexpected thing is Dr. Bo Broussard, the group’s leader. From the moment they meet, Sam is strongly attracted to his intelligent, alluring boss. It doesn’t take Sam long to figure out that although Bo has led a heterosexual life, he is very much in the closet, and wants Sam as badly as Sam wants him. As the investigation of Oleander House progresses and paranormal events in the house escalate, Sam and Bo circle warily around their mutual attraction, until a single night of bloodshed and revelation changes their lives forever. Warning: this title contains explicit male/male sex, intense violence, and graphic language.
Enjoy the following excerpt for Oleander House: Sam stacked the plates as they were handed to him and piled the silverware on top. Normal conversation had already resumed as the group began to scatter. Sam felt Bo watching him as he carried the dirty dishes into the kitchen.
He was running water into the sink when Bo entered the room. “Sam?” “Yeah?” Sam squirted dish detergent into the hot water and started piling dishes in. Bo walked over until he stood close enough to touch. “What did Amy say to you earlier? When you were in the storm cellar?” “What makes you think she said anything?” Bo glanced nervously behind him. “I’ve known her a long time. She had that look in her eye, like she was digging for information.” Sam shut off the water, turned and studied Bo’s face. Bo seemed agitated, shifting from foot to foot, but he held Sam’s gaze steadily. “She told me that she sees how we look at each other,” Sam said, opting for the truth. “She also warned me not to play with you. That you’re more vulnerable than you seem, and she doesn’t want to see you get hurt.” Bo’s cheeks colored, but he didn’t look away. “And what did you say to that?” “I told her the truth.” Sam kept his eyes locked onto Bo’s, gauging his reaction. “That I like you, and I’m attracted to you. And that I won’t hurt you.” Bo’s hand crept up to wind through the trailing end of his braid. “What else does she know?” “I didn’t tell her that I kissed you,” Sam said, guessing that was what Bo was really asking. “I figured it was none of her business.” He leaned closer. “It’s no one’s business that you liked it either,” he whispered. “Or that we both want it again.” Bo let out a soft gasp when Sam’s lips brushed the shell of his ear, but he didn’t pull away. A sharp thrill shot through Sam’s body. Cautiously, he laid a hand on Bo’s hip and pulled him closer. He pressed a feather-light kiss to Bo’s neck and felt Bo’s body tighten. “Oh God,” Bo breathed. He planted a palm flat against Sam’s chest. “Sam, stop, please.” “Do you really want me to?” Sam flicked Bo’s earlobe with his tongue. “No,” Bo moaned. “Wait, yes, I do!” He pushed Sam away. “Please stop, you’re… Christ, I can’t think when you do that.” Sam dropped his hand and took a step back. Bo leaned against the counter, shaking all over.
“You have to face how you feel, or you’ll never be happy,” Sam said bluntly. “You can reject me, but it won’t make this go away. If it’s not me, it’ll be some other guy. You can’t hide from it.” Bo’s eyes narrowed. “Don’t try to psychoanalyze me, Sam. You don’t know me.” “That’s true, I don’t. But I know how tough it is to feel things you don’t want to feel, and I know from experience that you don’t stop feeling them just because you wish you could.” Sam sighed. “I just want to help.” “Why?” Bo shot back. “What do you care?” Sam knew Bo was simply lashing out, a reaction born of fear. Behind his angry facade, Bo’s eyes brimmed with the longing for someone to truly understand him. Sam moved closer to Bo, so close he could hear Bo’s ragged breathing. “Because,” Sam said in a near whisper, “I care about you. Even though we barely know each other.” He reached up and caressed Bo’s cheek. “Even though you’re probably going to push me away again and tell me how straight you are and remind me that you’re married.” He trailed his touch down Bo’s throat, feeling the pulse racing beneath his fingertips. “I can’t help it, Bo. I want you, and more than that, I like you. I can’t watch you fight yourself like this and not try to help you.” Bo stared at Sam with wide, frightened eyes. “I made a promise to my wife, Sam. That’s not something I can just throw away.” “I know.” Sam lifted Bo’s braid, letting it slide against his palm. “I’m not asking you to.” Bo’s hand slid up Sam’s arm, fingers kneading his shoulder, and it was all Sam could do to remain upright. “This is wrong,” Bo said softly, almost to himself. “I can’t. I shouldn’t…” He trailed off, shaking his head. Sam, sensing that Bo was teetering on the brink, snaked an arm around his waist and pressed their bodies together, ignoring the surprised sound Bo made. “Shouldn’t what?” he whispered. “Shouldn’t want me like I want you? Shouldn’t kiss me like I know you want to?” He nuzzled Bo’s hair, breathing in the clean scent of shampoo tinged with a hint of sweat. “What shouldn’t you do, Bo?”
Bo sagged in Sam’s embrace, heart pounding so hard Sam could feel it against his chest. “All of those. I can’t do this, I can’t, Sam, let me go.”
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