Whisper to the Stars

WHISPER TO THE STARS Hettie Grimstead

Following the custom on her Italian island home, on her eighteenth birthday Tessa had climbed the mountain at midnight and whispered to the stars: "Send me a lover..." And the stars answered. Or did they? Was is just coincidence that, within minutes of her whispered plea, Tessa should meet the young Englishman Colin Kenward, and almost as swiftly fall in love with him? It was a meeting that was to change her life. For through Colin, Tessa was to leave her simple, carefree life and return to her native England--which turned out to be very different from what she had imagined. The only thing which did not change for Tessa was her love for Colin. But he did not after all seem to be the lover the stars had sent her, for he was engaged to be married to another girl.

CHAPTER I TESSA sat on a big rock, looking out over the blue waters of the Mediterranean and thinking deeply. The midday sun was hot, beating down steadily on her small black head, but she was quite accustomed to it. She had spent more than five years on the island now and her slim young body was golden-brown all over. Even her face with its wide grey eyes was the same glowing colour under the thick long hair flowing down her back. That was because the only hairdresser on Raltia was a barber, and like all the other women on the island Tessa was more or less obliged to let her hair grow as long as it would. The tourists who came to the island often stared at her as she passed, wearing her old linen shorts and a faded shirt. With her fluent Italian they always assumed she was a native daughter of this rocky outpost in the Bay of Naples, yet there was still something essentially different about her. Perhaps it was the proud clear-cut features she had inherited from her father, Tarquin Chievers, who had once been a world-renowned artist but now painted pictures nobody else would ever see in the little stone house on the mountainside where he and Tessa lived. It was the coming summer tourist season that occupied Tessa's thoughts now, though the time was only April as yet. With the Easter celebrations behind them, all the Raltians were busy preparing for the annual invasion. Antonio had bought two more pin-tables for the cafe and Luciana had ordered new sheets and towels, and Renato Ganni who owned the large hotel near the beach was actually importing some shower-cabinets all the way from Milan. The hotel was a comparatively recent venture, with an open-air dining terrace shaded by vines and brilliant decorations which Sergio had faithfully copied from a smart Rome magazine. Tessa was wondering if she could get herself a job at the hotel for the coming season, as a waitress or even a chambermaid. She had no doubt Mr. Ganni would engage her, because local labour was at a premium between late May and October. The problem was how to hide the news of her job from her father and whether she could keep it secret so long. Tarquin would fly into a terrible rage if he found out. "My daughter a servant to a lot of noisy loud-mouthed summer trippers, the vulgari of all that can be vulgar!" And presently he would demand her promise never to go back to the Hotel

Moderno again. The fact that they needed the money would not trouble him in the least. So Tessa sat up here on her rock, considering ways and means. Old Maria could come in and cook for Tarquin, of course, so he would not suffer personally by his daughter's absence. If he was occupied with yet another portrait he might not even notice Tessa was away from the cottage for unusually long periods. Dreamily the girl stared down at the bay, at the anchorage between the two arms of towering cliffs which made the little sheltered harbour with its miniature town. Behind the houses and the church the vineyards and the olive trees gleamed softly green. Then came the pine forest, and beyond that again the towering impenetrable mountain. There was nothing else at all on the island, not even a village. "When I think of the tips!" Tessa said aloud to herself. She spoke in English, the language she only used now when she was alone or talking with her father or very occasionally to a tourist. Yet Tessa had been born in Chelsea, in a gracious old house on the Embankment. London had been the Chievers' home for years. Despite his comparative youth, Tarquin Chievers had a become one of the most celebrated portrait painters of the day. Royal ladies sat for him, and no show at Burlington House or the Crown Gallery was complete without at least one of his brilliant studies in the arresting style that had won him such praise. He had married Naomi Lawrence. Her wealthy banker father had commissioned him to paint her on her twenty-first birthday, and they had fallen in love with each other as soon as she put her small foot over the threshold of his studio. They were supremely happy together, as deeply and passionately in love when Tessa was ten as on the day of that first romantic meeting. Their beautiful home was the meeting-place for artists and intellectuals and titled people, Naomi's parties invariably crowded to capacity. She had money in her own right, administered now by her only brother, a sedate and rather pompous City man whom Tarquin gaily called "the Philistine". To Tessa he was always Uncle Phil, and for many years she did not know he was really her Uncle Robert Lawrence. Tessa's childhood had been luxurious and quite happy, though she did not see a great deal of her lovely mother and her erratic but always indulgent

father. Nanny Bush presided over the nursery comfortably enough. There were plenty of toys and a pet cat and all the games and parties and outings with the friends made at the exclusive little private school just round the corner. In summer Nanny took her charge to Westbourne- on-Sea for two months while Naomi and Tarquin were abroad. Tessa could still remember every detail of that hot August afternoon when the world she had always known came suddenly and shatteringly to its end. She had been sprawled on the grass in the hotel garden, eating fudge and absorbed in the adventures of Jenny and Her Pony. A gorgeous lazy holiday time while Nanny took forty winks indoors. Then a maidcame running out to tell Tessa Mrs. Bush wanted her at once. "Why?" Tessa asked crossly. "It isn't nearly tea-time." "No, but something worse than that, miss. Took on awful, the poor woman has. Your Aunt Caroline spoke to her on the telephone from London." "I haven't got an Aunt Caroline, silly! So how could she anyhow ?" When Tessa did get indoors, she found Nanny sitting in the bedside chair with tears streaming down her fat red-veined cheeks. "Oh, my poor lamb!" Nanny sobbed. "However I'm going to tell you this dreadful news I just don't know. Breaking your sweet little heart!" The frightened child had started to weep in sympathy before she even grasped the fact her mother had been killed the previous night in a motor smash in the French Alps and her father gravely injured. Mrs. Robert Lawrence had telephoned the news, saying Nanny was to bring Tessa back to London immediately. They would be met at Paddington and driven to the Lawrences' home, where they could stay until future plans could be considered. Robert Lawrence had occasionally called at the Chie- vers' home, lunched or drunk tea and incidentally exchanged a few words with his niece, but he had always been alone. Tessa had never met his wife until the day she stood in the hall of their big old-fashioned house at Finchley. Despite the heat of the day, Tessa shivered as she looked up at her new aunt, so thin and precise

with pebble-hard brown eyes and a dull dress to match them. Behind Mrs. Lawrence were two schoolgirls, goggling wide-eyed. They were older than Tessa, and later she was told they were Lilas and Maureen. "So you're here at last," Mrs. Lawrence said. "We'd almost given you up." 'The train was late, ma'am," Nanny answered. "Then when I did manage to find a porter, he didn't know where the cars were standing." "Not used to travelling, evidently. Well, come along, then. I'll show Teresa her room." Tessa took an instant dislike to its heavy furniture and dark curtains and the view of the garage wall. She felt even more desolate when she found Nanny had to sleep out. "We've really no suitable accommodation in the house for her. Anyway, you shouldn't need a nurse, Teresa. Surely you can look after yourself at your age. You're nearly ten, I believe." "I was ten on the first of May, Aunt Caroline. And please, I'm not Teresa. I'm Tessa." "Don't be impertinent. My husband tells me you were christened Teresa, so that's what you'll be called in my house. Now run along to the kitchen and get your tea. The girls are there already." Later that night, as Tessa was going to bed, she passed the half-open door of her aunt's room and heard the sharp voice saying: "Such an obstinate child, and far too much to say for herself. She's never had any proper discipline at home - that's obvious. But of course with a father like Tarquin Chievers, what else can you expect ? It's no good trying to argue, Robert, because you know what I think about your brother-in-law ..." The next few months were intensely miserable for Tessa. She had nothing in common with Lilas and Maureen, who made no secret of the fact that they despised any little girl who couldn't roller-skate, play tennis and hockey or even knit. "And I don't want to learn, either," Tessa retorted. She made no friends at her new school and she missed Nanny Bush, who had inexplicably disappeared overnight. "She won't be coming back," Mrs. Lawrence replied

to Tessa's worried questions. "It's ridiculous to even think of paying her wages in the circumstances." Tessa still did not know quite what those circumstances were. She was only told that her father's head had been badly injured so he was being kept in a French hospital, and meantime Mr. and Mrs. Lawrence were kindly directing her welfare. It was almost a year before Tessa saw Tarquin again. She came in from school, dragging her feet because that always annoyed her aunt. As she opened the door he was standing there, tall and erect as ever with an unfamiliarly gaunt face and only a light dark down on his head where the hair had once been so luxuriantly black. Tessa gave a scream of delight and rushed towards him. "Daddy! Oh, Daddy darling! Is it really you? You've come to take mq home at last, haven't you ?" She was in his arms, laughing and weeping at the same time from sheerest joy and relief, kissing and hugging him. "We'll be going away now, won't we ?" she reiterated eagerly. "It's horrible being here. I hate it." "Yes, we're going away, Tessa my pet. Just you and I. The ones she left behind her." It was a long time before Tessa learned that her father had suffered a mental breakdown as well as skull damage. At first he had refused to believe the beautiful wife he adored was really dead. When he did finally accept the fact, he lost his self-control completely and became a dazed, unthinking being. Now the weary months of suffering were over and the doctors pronounced him sufficiently cured to take up a normal life again. But Tarquin did not want that. He sold the Chelsea house and his studio and everything he had. Then he went abroad, taking Tessa with him. For the next two years father and daughter wandered aimlessly around together. Tessa ate oranges she plucked off the trees in Sicily and drank coco-milk straight from the nut in Morocco and learned how to make the true Turkish coffee in Istanbul. They halted in Spain for several months, and

Tessa attended the local convent school where the gentle-faced nuns sighed over the motherless child and gave her some education in Latin and needlework. Then Tarquin moved on again, this time to Naples. Tessa stayed in a small hotel while he went off in a ferry-boat every day, visiting all the islands in and around the Bay. Capri and Ischia and even Procida were all too large and populous to suit him. Then he found Raltia, so tiny and so often isolated, and bought a primitive cottage on the mountainside there. "We should be able to find some peace here," he told Tessa, "with nothing at all to remind us of the past. Now I can begin to paint again too. I'll buy some canvas and oil tomorrow ..." Tarquin made himself a studio out of the lean-to hut where a peasant had once kept his goats. Sometimes he would stay there for hours, painting curious symbolic pictures of strange creatures that bore no resemblance whatever to the brilliantly-styled work he had done in the past. Not that it mattered, because he never allowed anybody to see his canvases now. When he had finished one, he would call Tessa and explain it to her. Then he went down to the cafe in the town to celebrate by drinking red wine with everybody who would accept his hospitality until Antonio finally pushed them all out and barred the door. Next day Tarquin usually wiped the canvas clean again and started on another picture. Tessa never questioned her father, loving him simply and devotedly because she had nobody else. The painter was a remarkable figure now, his hair thick and black again and a great beard he had grown since he left England. He wrote no letters, nor did he receive any, and none of his former friends ever visited the cottage. Periodically he would take his daughter across to Napleson the daily boat. There he went to the bank and had a private interview with the director while Tessa waited outside. They went off with some money and there would be a gay shopping spree in the Via Roma and perhaps a visit to the cinema or to the opera at San Marco. They stayed up all night and went back to Raltia on the boat next morning. Only lately the money seemed to have grown much less. On their last trip there had not even been sufficient lire to get Tessa the new skirt she so badly needed for Sundays. Things called dividends were not paying much now, it appeared. Not that Tarquin worried. He had been able to buy paints and

some more fixative, so he could get on with the picture of a sea-goddess he was currently limning on an outsized canvas. Nothing but this project occupied his thoughts at present. So Tessa sat on her rock now, pondering on the likelihood of earning money for herself. If she could get some tips from the summer visitors, she could buy herself that skirt and maybe even a brightly-patterned cotton dress as well, such as Veronica and Caterina wore when there was a dance. Men didn't want to partner you if you were only clad in shorts. Sometimes Tessa got desperately tired of those shorts and the well-washed boys' shirts she had bought so cheaply months ago. She longed to be pretty and gay with the other girls, to have a strong arm round her waist and a pair of admiring dark eyes telling her she was bellissima. After all, she was almost eighteen now. In Raltia girls were often wives and mothers at that ageTessa knew she must solve her problem somehow, but it would still be extremely difficult to do so successfully. Fortunately she did not have to ask Mr. Ganni about a job for a few days more yet. Sighing, she got up from her stony perch and slid easily down the smoother side of the rock on to the track below. Her rope-soled sandals negotiated the ground without difficulty as she made her way along to her home. Outside Tarquin's cottage the rough path from the road in the valley ended abruptly. He had erected a sign here, "Vroibito - Forbidden", and painted his door' and two windows flaming scarlet. There was a patch of coarse grass in front of the cottage with a few trees, and here their goat was grazing at the end of his chain. A large cream cat squatted on the step. As Tessa approached he rose lazily and stretched himself and accompanied her indoors. "Greedy old Toto," she said to him with a smile. There was only one living-room, and opening from it a kind of small alcove where Tessa cooked on a charcoal stove and washed at a rough stone sink. You had to get the water from the well outside. Tarquin slept on the divan in one corner while Tessa had the tiny room above which was reached via the wooden ladder in the opposite corner. But there were books and a painted chest and a rug Tarquin had got in Turkey and the radio set which still functioned intermittently when the weather conditions allowed.

It was getting time for their evening meal, so Tessa blew the stove into glowing warmth and heated up the soup. She placed the bowl on a tray along with a piece of cheese and some chunks of dark bread and half of the bunch of the first small grapes Giuseppe had given her from his vineyard. She carried the tray to the studio and deposited it silently on an upturned box there, leaving quietly as she had come. Tarquin did not like to be interrupted when he was working intensively like this. After consuming her own similar meal and feeding Toto, Tessa decided to go down to the town for an hour or two. She could talk to Veronica and Caterina at least. Like everybody else they would be strolling around the square, enjoying the evening sun beneath the trees and cooled by the splashing fountain. She washed and combed her hair and changed into a clean but shabby yellow shirt. Then she ran down the steep path towards the cluster of buildings round the harbour far below. Tessa found her friends sitting on "the steps of the fountain, beside old Luciana who let rooms to tourists in summer and sold them pieces of her hand-made lace. She was making a strip now, her gnarled brown fingers flying in and out with amazing dexterity, creating an exquisitely fine pattern that, as Caterina remarked, was "good enough for the bridal clothes of a queen." "Your thoughts are on marriage, then?" Luciana enquired. "Of course, Grandmother. What else should I be thinking about this spring?" "It is natural, yes," Luciana nodded her grey head. "A girl wants a boy just as he wishes for her. The thing is to choose the boy who is right for you." "That is so," Veronica said. "And Caterina cannot make up her mind whether to take Alberto Ganni or Pietro Moro." "Alberto will be a rich man one day. He will have the hotel when his father is gathered to rest. But he is arrogant and he will always expect his own way. Men with money generally do. Whereas Pietro may only be a fisherman, but he is kindly and more gentle. I have watched him feeding the birds in winter when the sea is too rough for them to fish in the harbour for themselves."

"That is foolish," Veronica declared. "A fisherman should not give away his catch to birds. Why, even the smallest offal fish can be sold to fertilize the soil of the vineyards. Pietro has no sense. You will be stupid if you choose to betroth yourself to him, Caterina." "But I shall be much loved and cared for," Caterina pointed out sweetly. Luciana's eyes lifted from her lace pillow for a moment to glance at Tessa squatting at her feet. "Why are you so quiet?" she asked the girl. "Do you not take an interest in marriage also? Or perhaps it is different with the English," she added politely. "No different with me," Tessa admitted. "After all, I'm grown up too. I shall be eighteen years old on the first of May." 'That is tomorrow." "Yes, Luciana. I wanted to hold a little festa, of course. But you see I can't, because," she was blushing beneath her tan as she spoke, "I haven't got enough money to buy favours and sweets and things, let alone pay for the wine." There was a short silence. Veronica and Caterina looked surprised, but they did not speak, and it was Luciana who said vigorously: "We shall have the festa just the same. It does not need to be at great expense. We shall meet here at eight o'clock and go to church to burn a candle to Saint Teresa for you. Afterwards there will be wine at my house and a cake I shall bake." "Oh, Luciana, how kind! That would be absolutely marvellous. But are you really sure it won't be too much trouble?" "To bake the cake with cherries and angelica? That I shall enjoy," the old lady declared firmly. "Have I not told you how I was apprenticed to the confectioner in Naples before I was married? And how I learned to make such featherweight pastries and cakes that even the fastidious titled ladies who lived on the hill were pleased."

She bent forward confidentially, beckoning the three girls to lean their heads more closely."There is something else too," Luciana murmured then»-"When it is the birthday you must whisper to the stars and ask them to send you the lover whom you want." "I never heard about that before," Tessa said. "What do you have to do ?" "You must go out alone just before midnight. Then as the church clock strikes, you look up at the stars and whisper to them of your heart's desire. They will light the way for your lover to walk towards you. Perhaps he will come right away or maybe you will meet him on your birthday, but it will not be long. The stars never fail you if you plead with them." Caterina giggled. Veronica only looked sceptical. "And perhaps you will also whisper," she told the lace-maker, "into the ear of Guido Armeni who we all know has much admiration for Tessa. He has been telling everybody how greatly he would like to see her standing behind the counter in his shop." "Goodness!" Tessa said. "I'd never be able to put up with the smell of the cheese all day long. Besides, Gui- do's quite old. He must be thirty-five if he's a day." "You go all the same, Tessa," Caterina advised. "I'm sure the stars wouldn't be so cruel as to send you a lover you didn't like. I intend to go up the mountain and whisper to them on my birthday in June." They chatted on for some time until Domenico the ferry-boat engineer strolled up and invited the girls to drink Coca-cola with him at Antonio's. He bought them a pack of cigarettes apiece and sent coins across to the juke-box so they could listen to their favourite pop tunes. When it was time to go, he gallantly offered to escort Tessa home. 'The path up the mountain is so rough. You might stumble in the darkness and hurt yourself." "But the moon's shining," she reminded him. "It will be quite light. Besides, I know the way very well, thank you."

Domenico was a handsome young man with a persuasive manner. He moved closer to Tessa and asked softly: "Why do you wish to go to bed so early? Come along to the boat for an hour or so. We'll take a glass of cognac together in my cabin." "Another time, perhaps." "What is wrong with now? I've some grand new jazz platters there. You should hear the Nat King Cole I got the other day." "Yes, I'd love to. When Veronica and Caterina are with us. Now I really must be away, Domenico. Buona notte." She hurried off across the cobblestones. When she was safely out of the square, her pace slackened. She climbed the rest of the way in sober thoughtful mood. In a few hours' time - no, in less than an hour now, of course, she would be eighteen, and what did the future hold for her ? Was she going to have to spend all the rest of her life here in Raltia? Looking after her father on a meagre shoestring, or maybe marrying somebody like Guido Armeni the grocer, or Domenico or Romano, and living with him in a little more comfort than she had now? Though it was doubtful if Tarquin would give his consent to her marriage with any of them. "You're not a common peasant like these people," he often said to her. "Never forget that, whatever you do." Then he would shut himself away in his studio once more, and how Tessa occupied herself or whether she possessed one decent skirt or not were matters to which he never gave a thought. She might not be a peasant born, but she certainly had to live and work like one, Tessa reflected. She remembered her roughened hands and the bruise on her leg where the goat had unexpectedly kicked out when she was being milked. As she sometimes did in moments of depression like this, Tessa turned, her mind back to the London she had not seen for nearly seven years. Vague and shadowy as the picture was, she knew there was another kind of life there. A life with grace and charm and comfort, and people concerned with other things beyond the price of food and the latest baby and Father Francesco's sermon. Where girls wore nylons and elegant shoes and jewellery and had their hair done in a

salon every week and were taken out to dine and dance by well-dressed men. Was she never going to get the chance to experience such a life for herself ? As Tessa reached the cottage, Toto rubbed against her affectionately. They went indoors to find Tarquin lying fast asleep on his divan. When it grew too dark for him to be able to paint any longer that day, he generally did go to bed. Tessa stood looking down at him, at the well- cut features she knew so intimately, and the thick black hair and the hand with its long slender fingers pillowing a cheek. Tears pricked her eyes for a moment. Then she bent and kissed his forehead very lightly. They had told her something of the damage her mother's death had done to him, and Tessa was fondly loyal above all else. Toto leaping ahead of her, Tessa went up the ladder to the little room, no more than a loft beneath the sloping roof. She kicked off her sandals and thought gratefully how sweet it was of old Luciana to offer her a little Jesta. Now at least she was assured of an hour's fun and laughter to mark her birthday. She considered what Luciana had said about whispering to the stars. It was one of those baseless superstitions, of course. Like putting a silver coin in the bride's shoe and never sowing your seeds while the moon was waning and carrying a new-born child three times round the house holding flowers over its head. The people of Raltia had so many of these queer foolish notions. Nobody with the least common sense could possibly believe in them. It would really be too childish for words to go out and talk aloud to stars. Tessa was very careful not to waken her father as she crept down the ladder again and made her way outside. She had a ridiculous little feeling of guilt nagging at her, because although this was completely stupid she did not seem able to help doing it. Instinctively she turned in the direction of her favourite rock and swung herself up to sit there pensively, looking over the exquisitely beautiful dark blue and silver panorama of land and sea. She had to wait for the strokes of the church clock to come floating up to her. At last she heard them and counted twelve. Then carefully she stood up and raised her face to the star- spangled canopy overhead. "Please send a lover to me," she whispered. "Somebody who'll love me more than anything else in all the world. And do please send him to me soon." She stopped there

because it seemed to be all she needed to ask. A sense of reaction overcame her. How idiotic to be wasting time out here in the moonlight instead of sleeping in her bed! She turned, preparing to slide down from the rock to the track again and go home, but then she heard something which froze her to the spot as though she had been suddenly paralysed. Somebody was coming towards her. The sound of the footsteps, unmistakably masculine, fell clearly on the still air as boots touched the hard unyielding ground. They came on and on, nearer still, and Tessa realized with a thrill of terror that they were not coming up the mountain but down it. Down towards her from the towering crags above that led only to the jagged peak, guarded by a sheer wall of cliff. Not even the goats could climb up there, let alone any human being. Then Tessa saw the figure approaching. It was definitely a man. Not a very tall man, bare-headed and apparently young, to judge from the easy agility of his movement. He was dressed entirely in black with a square protuberance on his chest. She stood there petrified, unmoving as the man came on towards her. He drew almost level with the rock, then he happened to glance across and see her. Promptly he halted, staring in astonishment. "Hello," he said in English. "What the dickens are you doing up there at this time of night ?" Tessa screamed and fell off the rock.

CHAPTER II NEXT thing Tessa knew she was half lying, half sitting on the ground, the man supporting her back. "You all right?" he was enquiring anxiously. "Do you think she's hurt herself, Bill ?" "She did come a cropper," another male voice answered. "What a turn-up for the book and no mistake! Fancy finding a kid like this dancing on top of a mountain in the middle of the night." "I thought it was a boy at first. I wonder if she's still breathing. How do you take pulses, Bill? Do you know ?" "Not me. Never was a Boy Scout, although my mum was always nagging at me to join them. Pinch her somewhere tender and see if she yells." "Don't be so damn callous - Good! She's opening her eyes at last. I say, are you all right, Miss Whatever- your-name-is?" Tessa blinked and sat erect. This creature was only human after all. In the spell of the moonlight and her engrossment with her midnight plea it had seemed for a few crazy moments he really must have come down from the stars to her. She opened her eyes wide and considered him. What she saw reassured her. He only seemed black because he wore a tight-fitting leather jacket, and the square protuberance on his chest was the camera slung round his neck. The second man who stood close by was similarly attired. Tessa could not distinguish their features because now they were all in the shadow of the rock, but their voices were pleasant enough. Just a couple of early tourists after all. Clambering about to take moonlight photographs was the kind of thing which tourists did. "Yes, I'm all right, thank you," she told them. "It was just the surprise of seeing you that made me slip." "You're not the only one who was startled!" the man said. "So you're English, then? Are you here on holiday?"

"I live here. That's my home over there." "What were you doing just now?" asked the man called Bill. "Some kind of Yoga, or what ?" Tessa had no idea what Yoga meant. "I was - I was deep breathing," she said with sudden inspiration. "It's very healthy." "You don't say!" "I was so amazed because you came down from the mountain top," Tessa explained. "It's supposed to be impassable up there, you see. However did you do a climb like that ?" "We didn't. We came over in our little helicopter and landed on the plateau just above here. Colin wanted to make some night shots of the island, and this is the ideal place." "A helicopter - yes, of course." That was nothing unusual. During the summer months there was a daily helicopter service from Naples airport to all the islands in the Bay, popular with visitors who didn't care for the two or three hours' trip by ferry-boat. "That's all right, then," she added, getting up and dusting herself. "You off home now?" Colin asked. "We'll come along with you if you like." ".No, thanks," Tessa declined. "Good night, or rather good morning. I hope you'll enjoy your stay here." "Goodbye. Sorry we gave you a fright." Tessa sped off along the track towards the cottage. Her heart was still beating faster than usual, but now she could laugh at herself. What tricks the imagination could play, to be sure! She slid quietly into bed, and as she drifted towards sleep her last thought was that the two tourists could only just have arrived on the island. Otherwise she would certainly have heard all about them when she was in the square. She wondered if they planned to stay long and whether she would meet them again.

In the morning Tessa rose at seven as usual. She milked the goat and fetched some water and found a few early tomatoes on the plants which grew beside the cottage wall. Tarquin was already up. He liked to go down to the beach early in the morning to bathe there, freshening himself for the day. By the time he returned, Tessa had made the coffee. She handed him a cup, saying gently: "It's my birthday, Daddy. Did you know ? I'm eighteen years old now." Tarquin paused with the cup halfway to his mouth. "Eighteen!" he echoed. "Can it really be eighteen years since I went into Naomi's room and saw her lying there against the pillows, cradling you in the curve of her lovely arm ? How radiant she looked, and. how happy I felt for her. Because she'd always wanted a daughter." He patted Tessa's shoulder affectionately. "Eighteen! It's incredible. Well, bless you, my child." Then he swallowed the coffee in one great gulp and went off to his studio. Tessa was not particularly disappointed. She had never really expected anything more. The day was much the same as any other for Tessa, but all the time she was eagerly looking forward to the evening. She was ready by half-past seven, wearing her white blouse and her Sunday skirt, so old its black folds were turning rusty in the creases. She carried her only pair of shoes in her hand because it would scratch them if she went down the rough track with them already on her feet. Tarquin, coming in for his meal, enquired where she was going. "Just taking wine with some people in the town, Daddy. Luciana is giving me a little birthday party." "Birthday ? Oh, of course. You're eighteen today."

He went over to the painted chest and took out the battered tin box in which he kept his papers. Unlocking if, he produced a small case which he handed to Tessa. "Your gift, my darling. It was your mother's favourite always. She would wish you to have it today, I feelTessa exclaimed with delight. The brooch was a large round turquoise bordered with tiny diamonds set in a scroll design of gold. She kissed Tarquin affectionately as she thanked him and insisted he should fasten the brooch on the front of her blouse. It would be nice to show it off to her friends, proving her father had duly marked her birthday in the proper way. She felt proud when she joined Luciana and the girls beside the fountain and displayed her new ornament. They all admired it, congratulating her on the exquisite workmanship, and it made up to Tessa for the fact that both Veronica and Caterina were attired in their pretty cotton dresses with bright ribbons banding their hair. When they had visited the church, Luciana led the way along one of the narrow side streets beneath the strings of washing to her rambling old house. The table in the sitting-room was covered with a lace cloth and on it stood a bowl of flowers and a handsome pink and white iced cake. "Oh, how gorgeous it looks! Thank you so much, Luciana. It must have taken you ages to decorate it like that." Everybody clustered round, laughing and chattering as Luciana filled the glasses with wine. Several other guests had been invited to the festa too. The hostess had bidden her eldest son, who was Caterina's father, and one of her brothers who brought his three teenage children, and also Pietro Moro. He had changed his fisherman's blouse for his best grey striped suit and a sensational embroidered necktie. Tessa concluded that Luciana definitely supported Caterina's idea in this respect. Guido Armeni was there too, kissing Tessa's hand elaborately as he presented her with a box of nougat - "the best in my shop", as he pointed out. Luciana's friend the retired music-teacher from upstairs came and sat down at the silk-fronted old piano to play Ammare- chiaro and Santa Lucia while they drank Tessa's health. Then the girl cut her cake, and Luciana produced a bowl of ice-cream with which to eat it.

Tessa was laughing gaily with Veronica and licking her fingers when suddenly she heard a new voice. It was speaking halting Italian with an English accent. "Scusi - posso - er -" And another English voice said firmly: "Why don't we just go in anyway? The old chap told us a festa would be free for all." Tessa swung round to see the two tourists standing in the doorway. At the same moment the one called Colin recognized her too. He smiled with relief and moved across to her. "Hello again," he said. "Is it all right if we come in? They told us at the hotel there was a party going on, so we thought we'd like to join the fun." "You must ask Luciana. She's the hostess. But I expect it will be all right. It's only a small festa, of course." When Tessa explained the position, Luciana nodded graciously at the two men and announced, "Okay - cheerio - welcome." That was most of the English she knew. Then she enquired their names and Tessa passed the question on. "I'm Colin Kenward, and this is Bill Janes who flies me around. We're from London ... Thank you, sig- nora." He bowed to the old lady. "Thanks very much." "Grazie tante," Tessa encouraged him. "Grazie - yes, I know that word. It's a good job we met up with you last night, I think. You make a splendid little interpreter. What's she saying now ?" "Luciana says you must behave yourselves decorously. Not take any liberties with the girls." "We'll be good," Colin promised, while Bill grinned broadly. "By the way, what do we call you ?" "I'm Tessa Chievers. This is my birthday celebration."

"It is? Jolly nice. Many happy returns of the day, then. How old are you ?" "Guess!" "Fourteen," Bill offered while Colin hesitated. "What, eighteen! You could have fooled me. You certainly don't look that." "It's the clothes," Tessa admitted. "I haven't got my new summer frock yet. I'm saving up for one, though. I shall buy myself a green one this year, I think." "I'm sure you'll look pretty in it," Colin remarked. "Green will be a good colour for you. Set off your dark hair and complement your sun-tan too." Nobody had ever said anything like this to Tessa before. She gazed at Colin in surprise, and as he met her eyes with a friendly blue response her heart began to beat much faster. She blushed slightly and turned quickly towards the table. "You must both have a slice of cake," she declared, "and a glass of wine, of course. You haven't been presented to people yet, have you ? That's my friend Veronica standing next to you ..." She introduced them all round as courtesy demanded. They were promptly swept up into the gay circle, where Bill made himself at home immediately. He was a thickset young man with a cheerful undistinguished face and stubby fingers, and he plainly had a matter-of-fact outlook on life. He was in complete contrast to his friend. Not that Colin was good-looking in the classic manner. He had untidy brown hair and unruly eyebrows and a trick of creasing his forehead when he concentrated. He was taller and slimmer than Bill, his voice of different timbre, and he wore his clothes with an easy air, casual attire though they were. Tessa thought he was the most attractive man she had ever met. He still had his camera slung round his neck and he was considering the party with a speculative eye.

"Would they mind if I took a few pictures?" he asked Tessa. "And one of you beside your cake would be fine. I'd like to record this evening." "I'd adore having my photograph taken," Tessa agreed happily. "Mario, who snaps the tourists when they come off the boat, did do me once, but I seemed to have two chins. He said it was because I moved at the wrong moment." "This time you can keep still," Colin smiled. "I want to take the signora too. She's got a magnificent face with all those wrinkles, especially when she laughs out loudly. Do you think you could ask her to laugh again forme?" In the end everybody had their photographs taken. Colin moved about popping flashbulbs, standing on chairs, crouching near the floor, telling people to ignore him because that would make better pictures. The neighbours came in to crowd them still more, drawn by the noise and the laughter and the music. Tessa had never known a more wonderful evening than this. Everything seemed to be tinged with magic, the old room gilded with enchantment and a strange new glamour. She f )r- got all about her own shabbiness and the fact that it was Luciana giving the festa and not herself and her father as it should properly have been. She laughed and teased and danced with the rest, singing gaily, her face glowing, her slim young body quivering with the sheer joy of being alive tonight. Hours later they wound up with a tarantella, dancing right down the street to the harbour and back again. It was long after midnight before the last farewells were exchanged and Luciana thanked once more and everybody going off their separate ways, yawning and stretching but thoroughly happy. Colin looked at Tessa, who was reluctantly exchanging her shoes for her sandals. "I suppose you have to walk all the way up the mountain ?" he said. "I think I'd better come with you." "Will you really ? That'll be nice." "Unless your father objects. He's looking at us in a rather peculiar fashion. That is your father waiting over there, isn't it? The portly gentleman with the moustache." Tessa giggled.

"No. That's Guido who keeps the provision shop. My father should be fast asleep by now. Besides, he's a painter." "Did he do the decorations at the hotel? They're certainly eye-stopping." "Not that kind of painter. An artist, I mean. He paints pictures." "Does he sell them ?" Colin enquired. "Oh, no. He never tries. Daddy wouldn't sell any of his pictures." "That's unusual, surely. All the artists I've ever known are only too eager to sell their work." "Yes, but you see - well. Daddy only paints for his own pleasure." "Ah, an amateur. I understand." "No, you don't, Colin. Actually Daddy was terribly famous once when we lived in London. He painted all sorts of people and they paid him the earth. Some of his pictures are in the national collection still. Only he decided to retire, and we came to Raltia five years ago." She stood up, tucking her shoes under her arm. "I'm ready to go now if you are." "Let me carry those for you." He took them from her and they set off up the street. 'Tell me more about your father. It's an interesting story. What's his name ? ...Tarquin Chievers. Yes, it does ring a bell in my memory." As they walked along hand-in-hand, Tessa told him. It crossed her mind that this was strange, because it was the first time she had ever spoken to anybody on Raltia about the family tragedy. Perhaps the wine had loosened her tongue, or perhaps it was because Colin was different from other people. He was a person you could trust. So she went on talking to him, words spilling out. It was a great relief to be sharing her problems and worries with a listener who was so sympathetic and understanding. They reached the cottage long before Tessa had finished her story, so they sat down side by side on the grass and continued to talk softly.

"I can put you in the way of earning yourself a few lire if you like, Tessa," Colin said presently. "We expect to be here for a few more days yet and we need an interpreter. Bill only knows three words of Italian, and you saw how bad 1 am at it for yourself tonight. I can't get the pictures I want unless somebody explains for me. So would you like to come around with us every day and do the necessary ?" "I can't think of anything I'd like more," Tessa answered. "Quite apart from the money too. You needn't give me much, of course. I don't suppose you're rich, are you? Rich people never do come here for holidays. It isn't a fashionable place." "Maybe not, but it's got charm. There's a unique quality about this island, Tessa. It's elusive, but it's still there. Raltia is natural and unspoiled - that's partly the secret, I expect." "You mean it's right out of everything," Tessa declared. "Cut off from the rest of the world." He nodded, patting her hand. "You sound resentful, Tessa;" he said. "Don't you enjoy your peaceful life here ?" "I wish things would happen sometimes," she owned. "I do think now and then that I'd love to. get away from the place." 'That shouldn't be difficult for you," he told her. "Go across to the mainland, or even back to England. Why not?" "England is what I really want. But I haven't - well, maybe one day I will have enough for, the fare at that." "You could earn money by working, Tessa. With your looks it wouldn't be difficult. And if you sold that brooch you're wearing, you'd get enough to keep you going for quite a time to start with. Those stones are genuine, I know." Tessa's hand flew to her breast, covering her ornament.

"Oh, yes, they are," she agreed. "But I couldn't ever part with this, Colin. It's sacred." "No? It was just a thought." He got up and stretched out his hand to draw her to her feet too. "Now, can you meet us at the hotel in the morning about ten o'clock ? I want to cover the church and the harbour if I can." "I'll be there," Tessa promised. "And thank you again, Colin. You're a marvellous person." "Thank you, Tessa. For having a birthday tonight. Goodbye for the present, then. Sleep tight." He went off down the track. Tessa watched him until he disappeared from sight, thinking how easily he moved. What a fabulous, utterly entrancing day it had been. She would remember being eighteen for many, many years to come. Tired and contented, she made her way indoors and up to bed. In the morning she told Tarquin about her testa and mentioned the two Englishmen with studied carelessness. "One of them is camera-mad, Daddy. I wonder why people want to dash about taking photos all the time when they're on holiday, anyway? I said I'd go with them to the church this morning and interpret with Father Francisco. It would be awful if they did the wrong things there out of sheer ignorance." "A base craft, photography," Tarquin remarked. "I refuse to consider it as a true art." He showed no further interest, so presently Tessa was able to go down to the town with an easy mind. She put on her skirt because the priest would frown on shorts, and once again she sighed with frustration as she contemplated the faded streaks. Perhaps Colin wouldn't like her so much now when he saw her looking so shabby in the pitiless light of day. When she got to the hotel and found him standing in the courtyard, she went across with some trepidation. Then he smiled and called a cheerful greeting, and Bill Janes said, "Here comes our girl friend," and everything was sunny again. They spent a busy morning, then lunched at Antonio's. Tessa was spooning up ravioli and tomato when Colin remarked:

"I want to make some studies of you this afternoon, Tessa. Only not in those clothes. In a gay summer frock." Tessa started to blush. "I haven't got a frock," she confessed. "I'm saving up for one. I told you before." "I haven't forgotten," he smiled. "Bill and I are going to buy you one as soon as you've finished eating. After all, we didn't give you a birthday present yesterday, so this is to make up." Tessa was speechless for a moment. "Oh, but are you quite sure, Colin ? I mean, it would be marvellous and you're both so kind, but still..." "Stop it now," he commanded lightly. "You'll choke! Of course we're going to give you a present. Everybody has to have their anniversary properly marked." Signor Fellini who kept the general store was enchanted to see them. He called to his fat wife, who waddled out and led Tessa to the rail of cheap cotton dresses. But it was Colin who ran through them, pulling them out for closer inspection, his forehead creasing as he considered their possibilities. Finally he chose one with a pattern of green leaves on a white ground, simple and modestly cut. "This is it," he announced. "I think it will fit you, Tessa. And you said you wanted something with green, I remember." "Yes, I did. Do you want me to wear this then, Colin? It does look as though it will be satisfactory for size." Colin laughed suddenly. "You say that like a woman of forty, not a young girl," he remarked. "Aren't you pleased with the thing ?" "Oh, indeed I am! I didn't mean to sound ungrateful." "Don't worry. Now we must get you a pair of white shoes to go with it. Those heavy sandals you've got on will spoil the general effect I'm planning. See if you can find something over there, Tessa, please."

She changed in the tiny cabina at the rear of the store, Signora Fellini planted firmly outside the door. When Tessa emerged, Bill gave a long appreciative wolf whistle, while Colin's blue eyes told her the answer to her anxious question even before she asked it. "I do look all right, don't I, Colin? It's such a beautiful skirt too." She picked up the folds and executed a few little dance steps to show him the fullness and how it extended. The mirror had already told her she seemed quite different now. The dress folded round her body in gentle curves and flattered her slim legs, the high-heeled shoes completing the effect. She really looked like a woman now, no longer a shabby boy-girl creature, and she felt as a woman too. Her eyes were glowing as she left the store with her two friends. "Up to the top of the mountain," Colin said. "You ready to spin, Bill ? We might as well go right away." "Are we going to ride in the helicopter?" Tessa asked eagerly. "Oh, what a thrill! I've always wanted to know what it feels like to be wafted through the air like that." "You'll find out in a few minutes," Colin laughed as they followed Bill down the street, past the fish-market and the dilapidated little customs-house and on to the open strip of ground in front of the island's only garage. Here the helicopter was standing. Bill climbed up to the front seat and Colin helped Tessa into the cabin behind. It was already half-full of cameras and equipment. The machine lifted like an eager bird, hovered over the town for a few moments, then moved across to the peak shimmering in the sunshine. There it descended gently. Tessa laughed and exclaimed as she got out and found she was standing on the slope just above her home. Bill started to unload the cargo, but Colin stood contemplating the rough ground with his forehead creased. "You mustn't walk in those shoes," he decided. "I don't want them marked. You bring the stuff, Bill, and I'll carry Tessa. Ups-a-daisy!"

She was in his arms, held against his shoulder, her cheek brushing his hair. Now she could see the lines above his brows quite distinctly. Her fingers had a sudden urge to stroke them away again, but she managed to keep her hands still. How strong his grasp was, making her feel so essentially secure as well as happy. She had a sense of belonging that was completely right and good. She could have wished this moment to go on for ever, very close to this man who was only a passing stranger yet suddenly so dramatically important to her. As Colin put her down, very carefully, on to the grass, she saw it was almost the same spot where they had met. The big rock was only a few yards away, jutting out to provide the seat with a view. "I want you to go and sit there again, Tessa, please. No deep breathing this time, though! Just sit and look out over the water. You get what I mean ?'' Tessa posed, her full skirt spread out over the black volcanic rock, her cheek on her hand as she watched the sea. She realized now that she must be in love with Colin. That glorious emotion about which the other girls talked so much had come to her at last. Colin had taken her heart and she was infinitely glad of it. Now she would know all the tenderness and the joy and the sweetness which loving and being close to the beloved could bring into the world. She smiled at him radiantly, contentedly, as he helped her down from the rock again. "How about taking something at your cottage, Tessa?" "I don't know if we can," she hesitated. "Daddy might not like it." "I'll ask him nicely, I promise you." "If he's working in his studio, he gets into awful rages if anybody dares to disturb him. You see. Daddy is rather unusual in some ways." "The artistic temperament? I quite understand. I don't want him to be angry with you, though, my dear. You look absolutely petrified at the mere thought of it. But there's no reason why he should ever know. We can sneak up quietly enough. I'll use my fast-speed camera."

"If you're quite quite sure, Colin ..." "Of course I am. Come along. Bill can stay here with the machine." Cautiously they approached the cottage. Toto came out to greet them, but there was no other sign of occupation. The studio door was wide open and the interior empty. "It's siesta time," Tessa remembered then. "Daddy will be down there in his hammock between the trees - Yes, I can see him." "That's far enough away," Colin agreed, following • her eyes. "We shan't make any noise to waken him." He moved inside the studio-shed, looking round cautiously. In front of the easel he paused and stared at the canvas which rested on it. "Lord, what colour!" he exclaimed. "And what superb drawing. This father of yours is certainly a brilliant chap, Tessa. I'm going to photograph this beauty even though I don't even begin to appreciate the symbolism." Tessa cast a nervous glance at the sea-goddess with her strange features, half human, half fish. "Do be quick," she begged. "Daddy would fly into a dreadful rage if he knew. And that might make him ill again. Have you finished? Then let's get out, Colin. Please!" She seized his arm and pulled him into the open air. He opened the cottage door next and stared round the room within. "Is this where you live ?" he asked. "It's incredible." "Why?" she demanded. "It's just the same as lots of other little houses on the island." "But the people who live in them are peasants born to it. You're a different clay. You shouldn't have to be imprisoned in a place like this. Good grief, there isn't even any running water, let alone electricity."

"We manage," Tessa answered loyally. "Daddy can't afford anything more luxurious. I thought I'd made that plain to you already." "Don't snub me, Tessa. I didn't mean to sound crude. It's just that it seems wrong for a girl like you to be living so roughly. I can see now why you're anxious to get away from Raltia. Well, let's go back to our whirligig again." Tessa started to walk out, then stopped abruptly. "Daddy's wakened again," she gasped. "He's getting out of the hammock. I believe he's coming over. Yes, he is. Oh, whatever shall we do ?" "Nothing," Colin answered. "If he's making for the studio he won't notice us anyway. Once he's inside, we'll leave." He reached out and took her small brown hand in his. "Stop quivering," he commanded. "We haven't committed any crime." The warmth of his contact was immensely comforting. Tessa let her breath exhale, relaxing with sheerest relief as Tarquin walked across the grass. He paused just before he reached the studio to stretch his large arms wide and give a prodigious yawn. Then he went inside and closed the door behind him. "Now for it!" Colin whispered, and a few minutes later they were climbing into the helicopter again. As they took off far above him, Tessa hoped Tarquin would not notice any unfamiliar noise. "So," Colin smiled at her, "we managed it, didn't we ? Shall we go for a swim when we get down, Tessa? It's the right time for the water and then a long cool drink afterwards." "Yes, let's. I'll show you the very best part of the beach." Bill decided he would stay with the helicopter outside the garage as he wanted to adjust the ballast control. So while Colin went along to the hotel with his cameras, Tessa sped up the street to the bakery which belonged to Caterina's parents. Caterina herself was serving behind the counter when Tessa's head appeared between the piles of loaves to ask her: "May I please

borrow your swimsuit for an hour, Caterina? Colin wants me to go to the beach with him now." "Colin ? Ah, the tourist Englishman for whom you are interpreting. I heard you were out today taking photographs with him and his friend." "Yes, that's right. If you wouldn't mind, Caterina dear. I would be terribly grateful." "But of course you may have my suit. I will run and fetch it for you." She came back in a few minutes to hand over a plastic bag. "It is the one I bought last week when I went to Capri for the day. Mamma says it is not suitable for a young girl, but as I told her you can see this style in all the fashion papers. I hope you'll enjoy your swim, Tessa. Do come along to the square tonight and tell me all about Colin, won't you ?" Tessa promised and hurried away. When Colin did see her in the low-cut one-piece black suit, he approved it warmly. "Snappy outfit that. You know, you'd make a first- class model, Tessa. I'll get some pictures of you when you're in the sea." "But you haven't got your camera here." "Yes, I've my baby mini. My spy camera I call it. Look, it fits right inside the palm of my hand." He showed her the tiny thing like a packet of cigarettes. "I simply lift my hand up and I can take pictures of people without them ever knowing it. This is what I was using inside your cottage." Tessa quickly forgot about cameras and everything else save Colin. After their swim they lay on the warm sand and talked. 'Tell me all about London," Tessa entreated. 'Tell me everything. All the little tiny details - absolutely everything." "You must come and see it for yourself soon."

"I shall. I've made up my mind about it. Shall I - will you... you'll be there too, won't you ?" "I expect so. You can look in and see me. Fifteen Comberry Street, just behind Knightsbridge. The name is on the door. Now let's go and get that iced lemonade your friend Antonio mixes so well." The next two days brought more long hours of magic for Tessa. As she went about with Colin she thought it was like walking through a wonderful dream in which you were not really conscious of the nature of your surroundings, but only knew they we're exciting and inspiring and supremely satisfying. Each evening they spent in the square, laughing and talking with the other Raltians, singing to the music of somebody's guitar or accordion perhaps. Bill proved an enormous success with the local girls. "He has the twinkle in his eye all the time," as Luciana put it. "I also knew a young man like that when I was young." On the afternoon of the second day, Bill took them across the sea to Naples so that Colin could go to the post office there and send off a package of films to London. There was a visit to the big travel agency too. "Just to check our tickets and see the flight reservations are okay." Tessa turned to Colin fearfully as Bill disappeared inside. "When are you going home?" she asked. 'Tomorrow." 'Tomorrow!" she echoed it in horror. "Oh, no, Colin. You can't possibly go away so soon." "Duty calls, my sweet. We've spent four days on your island, you know." Tessa felt as though an icy hand had taken her heart in its' grip. She said no more then because Colin's tone was so casual and unconcerned. They had coffee in the arcade and admired the flowers in the gardens of the Royal Palace and listened a while to the tinkling of the old mechanical piano-player before returning to Raltia. They spent the evening in the town

square, sitting round the fountain or in Antonio's, laughing and talking in the customary manner. Later Colin and Tessa strolled along to the harbour to watch the fishing boats come in on the late tide. The girl wished the hands of the church clock would stand still for once, but they moved on relentlessly. At last midnight struck and the square began to- empty. As Raltia proceeded to bed, Tessa got up reluctantly from her seat on a low stone wall beside the General's statue and said: "I suppose I shall have to go home now, Colin. It's tomorrow already. Your last day here." "I'll get Bill to take you up in the 'copter," he suggested, but Tessa shook her head. "Don't trouble. I'd rather walk up tonight." She bent to take off her pretty shoes and slip on the old sandals again. That meant she did not have to look at him directly as she went on: "Thank you for everything, Colin. It was kind of you to buy me such a lovely birthday present. I shall always think of you when I'm wearing this dress and my shoes." "I'm glad you happened to have your birthday, Tessa. I've got some photos with a definitely fresh angle now. I'll be sending you a packet of prints, of course. Just for a souvenir." He took the shoes from her and tucked her arm in his. "Come along. I'll walk you out of the town and see you on your way." When they reached the lower slopes of the mountain the path they trod became silver in the moonlight. Around them all the world was still except for the gentle wind which crept through the vineyards and brought the scent of lemon blossoms and early jasmine from the bordering fields. It was a night of enchantment when romance should have been quivering ecstatically on the soft warm air, but Tessa only felt sad and heavy-spirited. Colin was leaving her, and her heart would go with him. Not that he would know it. Inexperienced as she was, Tessa still appreciated that Colin did not love her in return, did not even regard her with particular interest except as a useful companion on his brief holiday. He liked her well enough, of course, but that was only in passing. It did not surprise her either. How could you expect a sophisticated man from London to be fired with swift love and desire for you in circumstances like these? Colin must know

many fascinating girls at home, with glamour and poise and elegance which nobody on Raltia could ever hope to emulate. If only she could get to England she might manage to acquire some of these attributes herself, then Colin would surely regard her in a different light. "Why so grave all at once, Tessa ?" he asked. "Sorry. I was just thinking." "Not very pleasant thoughts either, judging by your expression. Is Daddy likely to be waiting up for you with a big stick or something ?" "No, he isn't. He'll be asleep by now ... I hate the thought of saying goodbye to you, Colin. They've been such lovely days." "We've had fun, haven't we ? I didn't imagine Raltia would be nearly so amusing. Bill says he'd had the whale of a time too. I've never seen him dance so enthusiastically before. He can't bear it as a rule. It must be the island air or the pretty brand of girls you grow here." They had come to the end of the road where it dissolved into a few rough stony tracks, one of which led up to the Chievers' cottage. As if by unspoken consent, they both halted and stood looking at each other. "What time are you going back to Naples tomorrow?" Tessa asked. "Bill plans to leave about eight in the morning. So this is it, then, Tessa dear. Here, don't forget your shoes. By the way, you'll find your interpreter's fee inside one of them and a little farewell gift inside the other." "Thank you, Colin. You're the kindest person." He put his hand under her chin, raising her face. Lightly he kissed her, full on the soft lips but without any ardour or passion.

"Arrivederci, Tessa. Don't forget to look me up if ever you do get to London." "1 won't," she answered, and her voice was only trembling very slightly. "Goodbye, Colin... Goodbye." She stood watching him going back down the road. Just before he turned the corner by Giuseppe's vineyard he paused to look back at her and smile and wave. Then he disappeared from sight. "Arrivederci, my darling," Tessa whispered. "But not for very long."

CHAPTER III FOR the next three weeks Tessa went about feeling as though she was only half alive. She performed all the motions of being there and doing things as usual, but somehow it seemed to have no meaning any more. The only thing which did matter was amassing enough money to pay her fare to London. She was quite determined to go and find Colin again and show him she could be attractive and desirable too like other women. Once he met her again in different circumstances Tessa felt sure he would respond. All the details of how she was going to bring about this miracle were completely vague as yet, but her resolution was ice-hard and unswerving. Tucked into the toe of a white shoe Tessa had found a green chiffon square. She knew where Colin had got it. These fragile trifles were in the showcase at the hotel because tourists appeared to like buying them for head- scarves. In the toe of the other shoe were several thousand-lire notes. Tessa folded them carefully and put them into an old coffee tin which she took up the mountain and hid in a crevice near her favourite rock. If she left money in the cottage Tarquin might find it and take it to buy wine for everybody present when he had one of his wild sessions in the town after finishing a picture. Every week during the summer Tessa meant to add to the' contents of her tin. She had seen Mr. Ganni and he had agreed to take her on as a waitress for the season. She would get her meals and there would surely be enough tips to enable her to leave for England in October. What she was going to say to Tarquin about the whole matter she had not yet decided. Now Tessa waited imoatientlv for the tourist season to open so she could start work. On Sundays she wore her dress and her white shoes and thought of Colin more tenderly than ever. Everybody in town knew how she had got the new outfit, of course. Nothing could be kept private in such a small and close-knit community. Not that it caused any particular comment. It was only right that Tessa should be recompensed for the time and trouble she had given the two camera-mad holiday- makers who had arrived so unusually early in the year. Already most of the townsfolk had forgotten their visit, though a girl might mention casually how noisy Bill Janes had been, especially when he danced with her. Neither Caterina or Veronica or Rena

or Maria Pia, let alone old Luciana, ever guessed that Tessa had fallen in love with Colin. Proudly she hugged that secret to herself. It was far too precious to be hauled out into the light of day for everybody to talk about. One evening Tessa came into the cottage and found Tarquin standing in front of her tiny wall-glass combing his hair and beard. Her heart sank a little as she saw he was not wearing his customary jeans and cotton sweater but had put on his trousers and a clean white shirt with a tie. She realized what this portended. "So you've finished the sea-goddess?" she asked. "All I can do for her is done," he answered. "So tonight I relax. I shall enjoy conversation and a bottle of wine at the cafe. Have you got any money, my dear ?" Silently Tessa produced two tattered notes. "A hundred lire!" Tarquin exclaimed as he took them, "Surely we have more than this ? No ? I must go across to Naples tomorrow, I think, and call at the bank." It occurred to Tessa that if Tarquin spent the evening at the cafe he would hardly be in a fit state in the morning to get up early and catch the daily ferry. Later on she went down to the square herself and saw him sitting with Signor Fellini and old Constantine Modena andseveral other men. From the way he was waving his glass and gesturing, Tessa concluded that her father was preparing to enjoy himself. She chatted to her own friends for a little while. Presently they saw a smart red speedboat race into the harbour and tie up at the quay. "Ah, Ganni has been to Capri!" Luciana remarked as the hotel proprietor came ashore carrying an armful of packages and newspapers and periodicals. He walked along to his own terrace and went inside the hotel. Tessa was discussing the latest island birth with Caterina and Rena when suddenly Signor Ganni came running out of his hotel again, waving one of the newspapers excitedly and shouting at the top of his voice. "Mamma mia,

what can have happened?" Caterina wondered. Like everybody else sitting round the trees and the fountain, she got up and hurried over to question the hotelier. In a few minutes he was the centre of an enquiring little crowd. Then to her amazement Tessa saw him leading the people to the table in the cafe forecourt where Tarquin sat. Ganni thrust the paper in front of her father, waving and talking. Tessa jumped up now and hastened over to see what was causing this uproar. Her eyes met the glaring black headlines of an English newspaper. FAMOUS PAINTER TURNS HERMIT and

underneath it added:

The Mystery of Tarquin Chievers Solved at Last Top Photographer Colin Kenward broke his Mediterranean trip at Raltia and discovered this astounding story. While Ganni translated to the onlookers, Tessa stared at the pictures of her festa and the cottage and the interior of her tiny room. The sea-goddess gazed out blankly too, and Tarquin stood there with his great arms stretched wide, yawning broadly. Colin must have taken this with the miniature spy-camera, then. All the details of Tarquin's past life were set out. They had even found a small photograph of Tessa's mother and a copy of the portrait Tarquin had painted of her while he fell into love with his subject. Then Ganni turned the page to read on, and there was Tessa sitting dreamily on her rock. Eagerly her friends recognized and acclaimed her. She could only nod dumbly in return, for her head was whirling with the shock of it all. His beautiful young daughter, niece of Sir Robert Lawrence, the banking chief, who would have been one of this season's debutantes in happier circumstances. Could that really be herself ? Suddenly Tessa tore her eyes away from the newspaper and looked at her father. Tarquin sat there as though he was fixed to his chair as Ganni's voice continued. Then at last Tarquin stretched out a hand and took the paper away to read it himself, while all around the gay babel of sound went on. Tessa instinctively stepped back a pace. There were glasses and a bottle on that

table, and when Tarquin flew into one of his rages, he was quite capable of hurling everything movable within reach on to the ground. But Tarquin did not stir nor show any signs of hysteria or anger at all. When he finished reading he folded the paper again and handed it back to Mr. Ganni with a courteous nod of acknowledgement. Ganni was beaming all over his face, calling Tarquin "The Master" and "The Great Genius" with a characteristic extravagance. Hesitantly Tessa laid a hand on her father's arm. He looked up at her and smiled affectionately. Then he gave a long and very deep sigh. It seemed almost as though he was exhaling all the bitterness and resentment he had cherished for these past years. "Are you all right, Daddy?" Tessa whispered anxiously. Tarquin inclined his black head. "Don't worry, my child," he answered. "It had to come. I've known for some time now. No man can escape from life for ever. This way or another - it doesn't matter how it's happened." "You don't feel ill or anything ?" she persisted. "Not in the least. I'm relieved, I think. I suppose this Colin Kenward is one of those Englishmen you were taking around ?" "Yes, but I didn't know he was a real photographer. I thought he and his friend were just ordinary tourists. Everybody did. They never told us. If only I had realized at the time!" "It doesn't matter," Tarquin repeated. "It was inevitable that somebody should find me here sooner or later." It was not until well after midnight, when they were alone in the cottage at last and the oil-lamp had been lit, that Tessa could ask the question which worried her most. "Are we going to stay on the island now, Daddy? Or what?"

"I haven't considered my future yet, Tessa. It's quite possible we shall move on now." "Go back to London ?" she pressed eagerly. "Who can tell?" "But you wouldn't like that, surely ?" He smiled faintly, deprecatingly. "I'm not certain, Tessa. I might like it, you know. When we come to Raltia I only wanted to be left alone, but recently I've begun to recognize that if a man is left alone too long he's forgotten. I don't want all my work and the name I built up to sink into obscurity. These last few months I've felt stirrings inside myself. I've wondered what has happened to some of those pictures I painted years ago, and which of my old friends are still alive and what they're doing now. I haven't been able to summon up sufficient energy to make the first move to find out myself. But now this newspaper article has done it for" me." Tessa went to bed and thought about Colin for a long Time before she fell asleep. She was just making the coffee next morning when a small Fiat stopped at the end of the road and the driver got out and began to climb the track towards the cottage. Tessa went outside to see who it was. Alphonse, Ganni's head porter and chauffeur, greeted her with smiles. "I am sent for you and your father," he announced. "Mr. Ganni feels you should better come down to the hotel and stay there as his guests for a time. Because many visitors are on their way to the island to see you and so it would be more convenient. The rooms are already prepared for you." "What visitors ?" Tessa demanded. "Who are they?" 'Two reporters from a Rome newspaper have already arrived. They are eating breakfast now. We have messages to reserve rooms for others too. And a television unit also comes on the ferry today. And the mail which awaits Signor Chievers!" Alphonse rolled his eyes expressively. "So much it was flown in a special helicopter an hour ago. Imagine! It requires a special delivery for the signor only."

Tarquin had come in from his swim as Alphonse was speaking. "Very well," he agreed. "My daughter and I will come to the hotel right away." Speechlessly Tessa blew out the fire and rushed to change into her frock and its accessories. As she fastened on the turquoise brooch she found her fingers shaking so badly she could hardly manage to secure the pin. Then she followed her father down to the hotelier's car, sitting beside him on the rear seat. "You bring good trade to the island, Signor Chievers," Alphonse declared. "We have had instructions to provide a room for Miladi Cope-Dawlish who flies from Venice to see you today. Also for an American signor most anxious to visit you. Signor Alvin J. Barrinian." "Ah, Barri!" the painter exclaimed. "To be sure. So he's in Italy, then. He's one of the leading New York art collectors, Tessa. His galleries on Fifth Avenue are superbly designed. Several of my portraits were shown there, I recall." "And who is this Lady Cope-Dawlish, Daddy? Do you know her too ?" Tarquin laughed. Tessa thought how unusually cheerful he was this morning. "Arabella Cope-Dawlish? She's my second cousin and your godmother. Surely you can remember your Tante Arabella?" "Tante Arabella." Tessa probed back into the dim background of her childhood. "I do have a vague recollection. Wasn't she a great traveller? And she had red hair." "Masses of glorious auburn curls. With a fiery outspoken temperament to match. I was very fond of Arabella when we were both in our teens. I even thought of marrying her once. But then I met Naomi and discovered what love could really be." They reached the hotel where Mr. Ganni met them and showed them up to the only private suite, with its two neat bedrooms facing the sea and the

sitting-room with red leather chairs and a sideboard already laid with drinks. The table was piled with letters and telegrams and packets. Tarquin began to open these while Tessa wondered if Colin and Bill had used the suite too. She started to speak to her father, but before she could finish the door burst open abruptly and the two reporters came in. For the next few hours Tessa did not know whether she was on her head or her heels. By the end of the day Tessa had been interviewed and photographed, filmed and persuaded to speak into microphones and tape-recorders, and finally burst into- tears. Hastily Mr. Ganni poured her a glass of Strega and she revived sufficiently to shake hands with Mr. Barriman. After an exchange of back-slapping with Tarquin, the American asked to be allowed to look at the picture of the sea-goddess. Tarquin took him off, so Tessa was without her father's support when Lady Cope- Dawlish arrived. She stood on the threshold for a moment, then uttered a loud cry and hugged the girl to her well-corseted bosom. "Little Tessa! But of course you're not a child any longer now. Are you like your mother ? Let me see." She held Tessa at arms' length and they looked at each other. Tessa saw a handsome woman in her mid-forties, dressed in a superbly elegant white suit with pearls at her throat and ears, exquisitely groomed and carefully made up. Her hair was still richly glowing and expensive perfume floated round her like a sensuous veil. 'Tante Arabella," Tessa smiled. "You gave me a doll from Paris. I remember it well. And a bag from North Africa another time." "That was when my dear Aubrey was Assistant Minister in Casablanca. I'm a widow now, though." "I'm sorry. I didn't know." "Naturally not. Buried alive in this place, I don't suppose you know anything that's been happening outside it, do you? Where is Tarquin anyway? I'm longing to see him after all these years. I shall tell him exactly what I think

about his disgraceful conduct too. Vanishing without a word to anybody and never troubling to communicate with us all this time!" When Tarquin returned that was exactly what Arabella proceeded to do, They squabbled and shouted and argued and finally dissolved into laughter and "Do you remember?" and an exchange of affectionate kisses. Tessa sat quietly in the corner and watched them without speaking. "So it's all clear to me now," Arabella said at last. "Open one of those bottles of wine, Tarquin, and we'll drink to your health. You and Tessa must come back to London right away, of course," she added, and the girl's heart leapt exultantly. "It would be absolutely criminal not to take advantage of all this wonderful publicity." "You're coming too, I assume?" Tarquin smiled. "You were always fond of getting your picture into the newspapers." "I'm a person of importance, Tarquin. So will you be now. Everybody will be simply clamouring to see you again. We might hold a West End exhibition of your portraits. Borrow some of the old ones from the owners and so on. You'll need to find a studio too. Such a lot to be done, isn't there ? I think you had better come and stay with me until you're properly settled." It was just as easy as that. Arabella Cope-Dawlish was a woman of decision, and two days later the Chie- vers were on their way north with her. The sea-goddess had been sold to Mr. Barriman, whose cheque had already provided both Tarquin and Tessa with some clothes and a few travel necessities purchased in Rome when they changed planes. The cottage had been given to Giuseppe for his third son, about to marry and needing a home conveniently near the family vineyard. There had been a grand farewell festa attended by everybody in Raltia, Tessa thought. Her arm still ached with all the fervent handshaking and her face had been damp from innumerable tearful kisses before she left. The rose Luciana had given her was faded now, but Tessa kept it in her new handbag as a memento of the kindly old lace-maker. Now Tessa sat in the jet air-liner bearing her towards London and Colin, still thinking about this incredible miracle which had happened. It seemed funny

now to remember how she had crept out that night and whispered to the stars. A foolish island superstition - yet sure enough a lover had come down to her. When she got to London her first task must be to transform herself from the near-peasant girl of a Mediterranean island into an elegant young woman. Then Colin would be dazzled and delighted when they met again. "Fifteen Comberry Street, just behind Knightsbridge," she murmured softly to herself. There were more reporters and photographers at London Airport. Tessa smiled radiantly towards the cameras. Colin was certain to see these pictures of her in the newspapers, wearing the smart off-white tweed coat and nylons too, as well as the shoes he had given her. Now Tessa was front-page news, and he had put her there. She still felt hurt because Colin had not told her frankly who and what he was, but she had to forgive him when the result turned out to be so unexpectedly thrilling as this. Lady Cope-Dawlish lived in an exclusive Kensington garden square, in a tall house washed pale apricot with a black front door. They were greeted by several poodles and a coloured manservant and a brisk little woman with a bird's nest of greying hair introduced as "my indispensable Bobs". She shook Tessa's hand and said, "I've phoned all the people whose names you sent me, Arabella. They'll be here at half-past seven. Sharp too. They're all dying of curiosity." "A dinner-party I've arranged for you tonight, Tarquin. Old friends like Charles Povis and your agent God-frey Lemare and a few family as well. Robert Lawrence, naturally. You'll need to consult him about money affairs, I expect." "The Philistine!" Tarquin laughed. "Knighted at that since I met him last. How is he ? Pompous, and pedantic as ever ?" "Worse if anything. And definitely fatter. Tessa dear, Bobs will take you up to your room now. Make yourself completely at home there. You won't be needed at the party - it's just for the elders - but I'll send you a tray up later on."

It was a lovely room with French wallpaper and pink satin chairs and graceful mahogany furniture. Tessa looked round appreciatively, thankful to be left alone at last. Being plunged into a fairy-tale atmosphere so rapidly was something of a strain. As she unpacked her only suitcase she noticed the telephone on the bureau. Her fingers itched to pick it up and speak to Colin. It would be such a joy to hear his voice again. But the time to get in touch with him was not yet. She had many things to do first. Tessa looked at herself in the mirror and frowned sombrely. Her hair was too thick and ragged and her skin so brown after its years in the sun. Even her lipstick seemed wrong. It didn't make her mouth soft and inviting as it was supposed to do. There was such a lot of tricks she had to learn now. She was consumed with impatience to start this task of improving herself. Feeling tired, she lay on the bed for a while, but she was too restless and keyed up to be able to relax. She riffled through a magazine she found on the bureau, studying the new spring fashions very closely. Then the manservant arrived with a tray of food and a silver pot of tea. "All the guests have come," he reported. "Milady is very happy." One of the poodles had accompanied him upstairs, a small white chap called Snowball who leapt upon his new friend with warm affection. "You like him to stay here with you ? Okay." So girl and dog sat together on a pink chair in front of the window, sharing the plate of cold chicken and looking out at the dusk falling over London. Presently Snowball began to whine, running across to the door, wagging his tail hopefully. "I suppose you want to go out ?" Tessa said. "It seems a good idea to me as well. Why not ?" She put on her coat and tied the green chiffon square over her hair and followed the dog downstairs. The manservant was crossing the hall with a tray of glasses. He nodded and smiled at her. "I suppose it's all right if I have a breath of fresh air ?" Tessa enquired. She could hear voices and laughter coming from behind the white-panelled

doors on the opposite side of the hall, so evidently dinner was well under way. "Of course, missy. Snowball will keep you company. There is a lead for him in the chest over there." Tessa set off with a sense of adventure, Snowball prancing happily at her side. The lamp-lit streets were full of excitement for the girl, especially when she turned a corner and found a row of shop windows. How different it all was from Raltia! She sauntered along, gazing entranced, even pausing to read all the advertisements and the bills on the hoardings, studying the passers-by, especially the girls of her own age with their sleek hair-dos and gay clothes. Then she saw a policeman and sudden inspiration flashed into her mind. Quickly she approached him. "Excuse me, but is it very far to Knightsbridge ?" she asked. "Ten minutes' walk or so," he told her. "Go to the top there, turn left and keep straight on. You'll come right into Knightsbridge." Tessa found Comberry Street without any difficulty either. It was a cul-de-sac tucked away behind some great blocks of flats. The small square had charming individual little houses, brightly painted with boxed shrubs and hanging baskets of plants outside. Number Fifteen was blue and white and its window-boxes were filled with tulips. It was approached up a short flight of steps, and there sure enough was the name-plate on the door: "Colin Kenward - Photography." Tessa did not want to be discovered tonight, even though the house was all in darkness. She moved on to stand in the shadow of a neighbouring garage wall, Snowball flopping down at her feet. She stared at the exterior of Colin's home, trying to picture him coming and going down those steps, wondering what the rooms were like, if Bill Janes or somebody else lived with him, and who kept the place clean and cooked the meals and generally looked after Colin. Dance music came faintly to her ears. Distracted for a moment, she glanced at the other side of the square and saw brightly-lit windows and several cars parked outside. Evidently a party was in progress over there.

Uninterested, Tessa returned her eyes to the facade of Colin's house. Then she caught her breath, for a light had flashed on and the door was opening. A girl stood on the threshold, clearly silhouetted against the brightness like a picture in a dark frame. She was tall and she had a superb figure and deep gold hair on which the light was glistening. She wore a dress that was a tube of some pink material, a broad gilt bracelet on the arm she raised as she drew a fur stole more closely round her shoulders. There was something vaguely familiar about her, though Tessa could not imagine where she had ever seen a girl like this before. "Come along, darling," the girl called over her shoulder. "We're at least an hour late already, and you know how Imogen flaps!" Colin appeared behind her, almost a stranger to Tessa in his dark suit but still so dear and precious. He came down the steps with the girl, the door closing behind them. He reached the pavement first and offered her his hand. As she took it he said something Tessa did not catch and drew the girl close to him, kissing her lightly. She laughed and pushed his face away, but they were still hand-in-hand as they walked across the square towards the house where the party was being held. Neither of them noticed Tessa, pressing close to her protective wall. She gave no sign of her presence there, but Snowball had other ideas. Bored with sitting still in this empty place, he jumped up to regard the passing couple with interest. Unconsciously Tessa's grasp of his lead had slackened as she stared at Colin. A sharp jerk and Snowball was racing across to make this new acquaintance. Playfully he leapt up at the girl, but she squealed in alarm. "Get down, you ghastly little beast! You'll spoil my skirt - Oh, do send him away, Colin. This is my new Heim number. I can't have filthy pawmarks on it." Colin picked Snowball up in his arms and held him firmly, ignoring the loving pink tongue which licked his cheek. He looked round in search of the dog's owner and caught sight of Tessa frozen stiffly in the shadow of her wall.

"Is this poodle yours?" Colin asked. "Then come and get him, will you? You ought to keep him in better control." Tessa neither moved nor spoke. She prayed he would release Snowball and go on his way to the party, but instead Colin started to walk towards her. "It's a nice little dog, but it's being a nuisance just now. Can't you .. ."He broke off, staring at her. "Tessa!"he exclaimed. "It is» you, isn't it?" "Yes, it's me," she admitted forlornly. "Hello, Colin." "Of course," he remembered. "Why, I've just been looking at your arrival photos in the Evening Echo. I suppose you're on your way to see me? Do you want to tweak my nose for doing that feature about your father?" Without waiting for Tessa's reply he turned to call to the other girl. "Come here, darling. What do you think? The dog belongs to Tessa. Tessa Chievers!" High heels clacked on the pavement as the girl hurried across. "I don't believe it," she was saying. "You're pulling my leg with one of those boyish jokes again." Then she too was staring, great brown eyes wide. "It is!" she declared. "It actually is our Tessa after all these years. What a supreme coincidence! You've got a gorgeous tan, my dear. You used to be so terribly pale, too." The voice and the eyes were both familiar now, but still Tessa could not identify her. The girl went on: "How does it feel to be getting all this heavenly publicity in the papers, Tessa? I'd give anything for just a tiny ration of it. Publicity is such a help to any model. By the way, I helped Colin with all those family details in his story. Mother didn't mind revealing them in the least. Father turned deepest crimson when he read the thing, though." Then she laughed delightedly.

"Why, she doesn't even remember me, Colin darling. Isn't it a giggle in the circumstances? I'm Lilas, Tessa. Lilas Lawrence." "Your cousin Lilas," Colin supplemented, "and my fiancee too."

CHAPTER IV TESSA was never very clear as to how she got home that night. She remembered later that there had been some more conversation, with Lilas saying Tessa must come and visit at her flat and Colin declaring that he would ring up soon. Then they had parted again, and Tessa and Snowball found their way back to the unfamiliar thoroughfare with the huge red buses and hurrying crowds. It was the dog who knew the route and led the girl to Lady Cope-Dawlish's house again. When the door opened at Tessa's ring, she stepped inside to receive a confused impression of a lot of people, all looking at her. "Here she is!" they cried. "Why, she's been taking the dog for a walk!" They clustered round to shake her hand and ask her questions, and although she could not remember any of them she had to smile when they stressed how they would have known her again anywhere, and be generally polite. Tarquin, so unfamiliar in a dinner jacket, nodded paternally in the distance but gave her no help. It was only Robert Lawrence who struck any chord in Tessa's memory. He was indeed heavier and more impressive-looking now, but his manner was just the same as it had been years ago. He kissed her forehead and said: "Well, well! It's been a long time, Tessa my dear." "Yes, hasn't it ? I hope you're well, Uncle Robert." "Quite, Tessa, thank you. You've grown a lot since I saw you last, of course." "Yes, I expect I have. I'm eighteen now, after all." "A fact I learned tonight. I want you to come to my office tomorrow, Tessa. There's some financial business to be settled between us. I've spoken to your father about the matter. Lady Cope-Dawlish will give you my address." "Bobs will take you there, Tessa," Arabella said, "so don't worry. Now do leave the girl alone, Robert. She looks utterly worn out. Travelling since early this morning and such a lot of emotion too. That can be immensely

wearing, you know. Just you get along to your bed, Tessa darling, and ignore all the rest of them." Tessa cried herself to sleep that night. That Colin might already be engaged was a possibility which had never occurred to her for a moment. Even though she had heard it from his own lips it seemed incredible to her. He must be in love with Lilas, then. When you saw her that wasn't really surprising after all. Tessa knew Colin had not been aware of her in the way she longed for, but she had felt he must change his attitude when she had turned herself into the sophisticated type he would naturally admire. Then her love for him would surely strike the spark at last. It had all seemed quite simple as she worked it out on the mountain. Now as she lay red-eyed, staring into the London darkness, she realized how absurdly immature her thinking had been. Weaving such fanciful notions about Colin just because he had happened to scramble down the rocks at the same time that she was whispering to the stars to send her a lover. Now reality had dealt her this devastating blow. Even through the pain of it, Tessa could see the fault was her own. Colin had never tried to make love to her. That careless goodbye kiss certainly did not hold any significance. Looking back long afterwards, Tessa often felt she had finally grown up into her womanhood that sleepless night, though she had wept again at the bitter coincidence that it should be Lilas who had captured the man she wanted for herself. The tall long-legged schoolgirl of Finchley days, with her mother's expression at times, who had been so contemptuous of the youngster unable to play any vigorous games. Lilas had changed a good deal too, obviously throwing off the maternal yoke from the way she had spoken about her flat and her friends. Tessa had a headache in the morning, but she sat up dry-eyed and outwardly composed when her breakfast arrived. Bobs carried it in, Snowball at her heels. Barking happily, he leapt on to the bed and proceeded to kiss Tessa a fond good morning. "How are you?" Bobs asked. "Fighting fit, I hope, because you've got a heavy day ahead."

"Have I ? What's Daddy doing today, I wonder ?" "Sleeping the party off now. Then he's going to the tailor's and lunching with an art agent. Now, as soon as you're dressed I'm going to take you to the City to see your uncle about your money." "Money? What money?" Tessa picked up a spoon and thrust it into the grapefruit she did not want to eat. "Your legacy, my dear. Sir Robert will explain it all to you presently. I don't know the actual details, but I gather it's the money your mother left you in her will. The probate hadn't been granted when you left England, and since nobody knew where you were after that, the money must have been accumulating for you in the meantime." "I've got some money of my own ? Is that it ?" "Yes. And very nice too. You're a lucky girl. I suppose you'll want to buy yourself some clothes and things." "I would like to look elegant - yes, Bobs. But I don't know how to start." "At the hairdresser's," Bobs replied firmly. "I'll ring Alphonse for an appointment for you. You can be done this morning before we go to the City. A good trimming and re-styling could make a lot of difference to you. We might be able to see what shape your head really is afterwards." When Tessa emerged from Alphonse's pink and grey salon in Bond Street she was somewhat comforted to see she did look more like a fashionable city girl now. Her hair had been ruthlessly trimmed and gleamed like a blackbird's wing, swinging round her shoulders. Her eyebrows had been shaped and her finger-nails painted light pink and her crude lipstick exchanged for a soft rose one which she had been shown how to apply skilfully. "Now you look civilized," Bobs commented frankly. "We'll get you a pair of gloves and a leather bag instead of that straw monstrosity with Capri on it.

Then you'll be fit to meet Sir Robert. He's going to take you to lunch, by the way." Tessa stared in awe when they got out of the taxi in front of a tall white skyscraper near Lombard Street. The offices of Lawrence & Brendon, merchant bankers, occupied the top six floors. They shot up in an elevator and a pretty receptionist assured them that Sir Robert was certainly expecting Miss Chievers. So Bobs went away on her own affairs, promising to call back for Tessa at half past two, ready for the shopping expedition. Soon Tessa was sitting opposite her uncle in his handsome room with its panoramic views of the London skyline. She did not understand everything he told her, but she did gather that her mother had left her a substantial sum of money. "Part to be paid to you on your eighteenth birthday, Tessa, the remainder when you are twenty-one, or on your marriage if earlier than that date. You've returned at an excellent time, you see. As the executor, I'm also your trustee, and what I advise is..." Tessa signed the various documents he put in front of her and was assured that she could now enjoy her proposed shopping trip. Then Sir Robert flicked the key of an intercom telephone box on his desk and said: "Send Mr. Seagrave in now." To Tessa he explained: "I had promised myself the pleasure of giving you luncheon, my dear, but unfortunately a most urgent financial conference has cropped up. So I've asked one of our junior executives to look after you instead - Ah, come in, my boy! This is Roger Seagrave, Tessa. My niece. Miss Teresa Chievers." They shook hands. Tessa saw a man around thirty, calm-faced and squarely built with somehow a look of the open air about him despite his black City jacket and striped trousers. His manner was friendly enough, but Tessa still felt oddly ill at ease as he escorted her down in the elevator again. "I'm sorry I was wished on you like this," she told him. "I hope you don't mind too much." "I'm delighted, Miss Chievers. Where would you like to lunch ? I thought perhaps the Grand Central Hotel ?"

"Very well. I don't know the places. I've never been in the City before." They walked along the street in silence for a few minutes. Tessa stared up at the high buildings, gasping for air as they stretched towards the sky, wedging the traffic into narrow crevasses and making the midday crowds jostle and push so impatiently. She had a swift nostalgia for the colourful peace of sun-warmed Raltia, where everybody had time to consider his neighbour when walking out. Then Roger Seagrave said something about a short cut. He drew her into a side alley too narrow for wheeled traffic, with surprisingly an ancient tree inside a railing and a row of little shops. One had a striped awning over the door and Trattoria emblazoned on it. Tessa halted with pleasure. "An Italian cafe! Oh, how lovely!" She pressed her face against the window and looked inside at the square tables with their checked cloths and the big noisy coffee-machine, an OGGI just like Antonio had. Roger had stopped too. He looked at her enquiringly. "You don't - would you prefer to have your lunch here, then ?" he asked. "Yes, please, I should," Tessa answered. "That is, if it's all right with you. Only that pizza they're serving looks so very good." "So it does. Come along, then." The café was well filled with office workers, but they managed to find two chairs, and Tessa was able to exchange a flood of Italian compliments with the enchanted proprietor. "Of course, you've been living on a remote Mediterranean island, haven't you? I remember reading that in the paper last night," Roger Seagrave said. "Everybody's read about me," Tessa sighed. "I'm beginning to feel as though I'm a freak of some kind." "Then just look in the glass over there and you'll change your mind. I think you're charming myself."

Suddenly they were friends. The smile that passed between them dissolved all the stiffness and established contact. They ate and drank and talked, and Tessa found it relieved her heavy dullness to listen to his stories of the City. He had a lot of fascinating information about it. "London's history has always been a hobby-horse of mine," he explained. Presently he was telling her about the Tower and the ravens. "Of course you've been there to see the Crown Jewels ?" "No, never. I don't know London at all. I was only a child when we went abroad. I'd love to see the Jewels, though. They must be a glorious sight." "Then finish that pastry you're eating and we'll go along to the Tower now." "Now?" she echoed in surprise. "Why not? It's barely half past one yet, so there's plenty of time." Tessa decided she might as well. The sun was coming through the clouds again now, gilding the old grey buildings round which the clouds of pigeons fluttered busily. He took her arm to guide her through the lunch- time jostle, and it gave her the feeling of being with a man who had purpose and confidence. Tessa soon found she was enjoying her visit to the Tower more than she had expected. It was enthralling to follow a stalwart Yeoman across the drawbridge and under the low stone arches, past the quaint old houses with their diamond-paned windows and through the courtyards where so much of England's history had been fashioned in the past. When they reached the Wakefield Tower, she stared wide-eyed at the glittering array of the Crowns and the Jewels brilliantly lit behind their heavy windows. She had never imagined that such huge rubies and emeralds and diamonds, magnificently surrounded by other stones in their rich gold settings, could possibly exist in the world. It was well after three o'clock before they got back to Lombard Street. Bobs was waiting patiently in the reception foyer, accepting Roger's explanation understanding^.

"Quite right to show her round a bit. You're Monica Seagrave's son, aren't you? Thought so. Lady Cope- Dawlish knows your people, of course. You must come to Tessa's party next week. I'll be sending you an invitation. Now if you're ready, Tessa ?" When they were in the taxi on their way to the West End shops, Tessa said: "What did you mean by asking Mr. Seagrave to my party just now ?" "I thought you liked him. You looked bright enough when you came in with him." "He's nice. But what party is it, Bobs ? I haven't heard anything about it." "Hardly surprising. Arabella only arranged it a couple of hours ago. We were talking about plans for your future. Your father was there and he's agreeable to leaving everything to Arabella. She is so tremendously capable, of course. A big party to introduce you to people - that's the general idea. You must find some social life now. How else are you going to occupy your time ?" "But aren't I going to live with Daddy somewhere? When he's found us another home. I'll be keeping house for him the way I've always done." "I don't think so, Tessa. Circumstances are different now. Still, we can't talk about that today. I suppose you're thrilled at the thought of all these new outfits ?" "Yes, I am. Do you think Tante Arabella will let me invite Colin Kenward to the party?" "I'm sure she will. The Lawrence girls as well, I assume? The modelling one is engaged to Kenward, I understand. She's been engaged to several other men before, too." "Has she?" Tessa turned from the window to ask eagerly: "Who, Bobs ? Do tell me."

"Oh, there was some racing motorist first. I forget his name. Then it was Lord Medvale's younger son. When they broke that off, her name was linked with a rich American. She's the kind of girl who's always being talked about, though. Now she's supposed to be marrying Kenward." "V expect a lot of men fall in love with her," Tessa said. "After all, she's really very beautiful." "Not to my taste. I prefer the more natural type of beauty. Green eyelids and a watermelon smile just leave me cold." "I wish I looked like Lilas, though." "Why? You're quite pretty as you are. And when we get you fitted out properly..." The clothes they chose at an exclusive shop near Berkeley Square did make a tremendous difference. Several suits and coats and half a dozen dresses were put aside. Standing there in a pastel yellow silk cocktail frock, Tessa only wished Caterina and Veronica and all her other friends from Raltia could be here to see her now. How changed she was from the brown boy-girl in faded shirt and old shorts who went out to draw the water every morning. And it was all due to Colin. Because he had come down from the mountain that night, her whole world had been changed as a consequence. A model girl drifted across the thick carpet, showing a great full-skirted evening gown of ivory chiffon frosted with silvery paillettes and embroidered with tiny pearls. Tessa exclaimed in admiration. "Oh, what a wonderful dress! It glitters like snow in the sunshine, doesn't it?" "With your exquisite tan it would be perfection," the saleswoman murmured persuasively. "It was designed for a figure like yours." "Can I have it, Bobs? Do I have enough money to afford it ? I'm sure it's terrifically expensive, of course."

"But you don't need a dress like this, Tessa. Do be sensible, my dear. This is a grande toilette ballgown, the kind of thing you only wear on great occasions. You aren't likely to go to anything like that." "No-o, perhaps not. But shan't I want something for my own party ? I suppose there'll be some dancing there." "You'll wear the pale pink satin - the short one. That's why we've got it. All the girls will have short-skirted dresses like that." "Oh, dear! Still, I suppose you know best." That evening there was a conclave in the drawing- room. Tessa was so anxious not to be late she got downstairs first and sat alone on the lime-green silk sofa. At her feet Snowball moved a trifle reproachfully. Tessa would not allow him on her brand-new dress. She heard Tarqum's footsteps coming along the hall, and as the door opened she gasped in surprise. "Daddy! You've shaved your beard off!" Tarquin fingered his chin self-consciously. "Yes. It's a great improvement too, I feel. It makes me look years younger. I didn't have a beard when I lived in London before, so I thought it would be more suitable to become clean-shaven again." Arabella had come in as he was speaking. "Don't you like it so much better too, darling?" she asked Tessa. "It isn't as if you were one of the Chelsea ultra-moderns, Tarquin. Yours has always been the purely classic style. Tell Tessa about the magnificent new studio we've found for you." Tessa listened with mixed emotions as her father described it. "I can't wait to get to work again," he said. "My agent already has two prospective sitters lined up." The studio was exactly right, with service facilities but no accommodation for anybody else except the painter. Tessa was to stay on here with Arabella for the time being. "Until you settle down properly," that lady enlarged, "make some friends and decide what you want to do with yourself now."

"Do ?" Tessa murmured. "What am I supposed to do, Tante Arabella?" "Whatever appeals, darling. Take a secretarial course perhaps. Or study music or flower-arrangement or antiques:1' There's so many fields open to young things nowadays. You might even meet some other girls with whom you'd like to share a flat. So good to be independent, I always feel. Though you're welcome to stay under my roof just as long as you please, of course." Despite all these prospects, Tessa was still forlorn when she went up to her room later on. Arabella and Tarquin had decided to play chess and hardly noticed her departure. "Things are certainly different now," she remarked to Snowball. "I suppose I'll get used to it all in time. I only wish I could feel happier." Tessa thought she would take a long and leisurely bath before she went to bed. The elegant yellow and grey bathroom with its masses of fluffy towels was still an attractively novel luxury. As she was undressing Bobs rapped on the door. 'Telephone for you. It's Colin Kenward." "Colin!" Tessa flung on her dressing-gown and ran downstairs to the study. She felt herself quivering eagerly as she heard his voice in her ears again. 'Tessa? Oh, hello again. How are you now? ... The reason I'm calling is because I've an invitation for you. Some friends of ours, the Cheviots, are having a big affair tomorrow night and they've specially asked me to bring you along. Can you manage it?" "It's very kind -" Tessa began, then stopped. She was not properly accustomed to using the telephone yet and she found it awkward to express herself clearly into a blank-looking instrument. "Would you like me to come?"

"But of course. That's why I'm asking you. No need for you to feel shy, I assure you, Tessa dear. They're charming people. They live at Harringby House. Ah, here's Lilas! She wants, a word with you too. Hold on." Then it was Lilas's husky voice cooing to her: "You will come, darling, won't you? Our friends are simply aching to meet you. After all this publicity you've been getting, but naturally. You'll enjoy your evening, I promise. We're going to have a real ball. Absolutely the most gorgeous time." A ball! Tessa thrilled at the sound of the word. Some- 67thing she had often dreamed about in Raltia but never yet experienced. "I'd love to come," she said eagerly, "Onlyit means dancing, doesn't it?" "What else? Dancing till our shoes fall into holes, my pet." "I adore dancing. But I don't know anybody to dance with. Men, I mean." She heard Lilas laughing then. "One look at you, Tessa darling, and all our men will be lining up to take you round. You can always start with Colin anyway, if you feel nervous. I'll lend him to you for a bit! You pranced about with him at the lesta, didn't you? I remember there was a picture of you... Well then - you'll come ?" "Yes, I will, Lilas. Thank you ... Thank you very much." She went back to her room in a rosy daze. A ball! A dazzling, glamorous evening filled with music and romance. She would dance with Colin again too, even though Lilas would be there as well, looking superbly fashionable, naturally. But Tessa Chievers would be quite elegant because she was going to wear a white gown like snow in the sunlight, a great skirt spreading behind her as she walked. First thing tomorrow she was off to buy that gown. Harringby House! How grand and impressive that sounded. Cheviot was a distinguished sort of name, probably belonging to a titled family who were entertaining in their town mansion. It would be a brilliant occasion of the kind she had seen and sighed over when Mr. Ganni had given her some

old English periodicals from the hotel. When she had studied those glossy photographs she had never imagined she would be invited to a ball herself. The maid brought her breakfast tray in the morning. "Miss Bobbingsford's had to go out with her ladyship. But if there's anything you want to know, you can ask me. Tessa put on her new beige suit and the little hat of tangerine flowers and found her precious handbag. She took a reassuring peep inside it, to look at the notes with which Bobs had provided her. Then she ran downstairs to get a taxi to Berkeley Square. In the hall she met her father. The new, well-groomed Tarquin had an air of confidence and preoccupation. Tessa smiled at him as she said: "Good morning, Daddy. What do you think ? The most wonderful thing has happened to me. I've been invited to a ball." "Have you? Well, be a good girl, then," Tarquin replied, abstractedly smoothing his flowered silk waistcoat. "I'm meeting Arabella at noon to see Favrioli's new show. He used to be such an abstract colourist in the old days, but I hear his style is completely different now. It's going to be highly interesting." Tessa kissed his cheek and hurried off. The saleswoman remembered her perfectly. "A last-minute invitation to a ball ? But how marvellous for you. Of course you must be dressed for an affair like that. Mathilde, bring out the gown for Miss Chievers to try on in the small fitting-room." It was even more wonderful when Tessa put it on, swirling filmy clouds pricked with silver, catching the light as she moved. Looking at herself in the mirrors, she knew this was indeed the dress of dreams. Over it went a green organza coat, rustling delightfully, and long green elbow gloves. 'They're always worn at balls in England, you know." There was not even any question of price or money. "We can charge it to your account, Miss Chievers. But of course!" She went home feeling as though she was floating on air, surrounded by boxes and packages. There was still nobody in, so only Snowball shared her excitement as she took out all the glamorous things she had bought and laid them about her room. The afternoon hours seemed endless. She took

Snowball for a run in Kensington Gardens, then bought some picture postcards of London views and sat on a seat near the flower-beds addressing them to all the people she knew in Raltia. "I am going to a ball tonight," she wrote proudly. Perhaps Colin would take some photographs again and then she could send these to her friends too. By half past seven Tessa was ready. Her white skirts floated around her slim legs as she walked, silver toes peeping out coyly, all glitter and sparkle. She smoothed down the long green gloves and drew on the coat affectionately. A narrow diamante bandeau spanned her black hair and there was a matching bracelet on her wrist. "Much more charming for a debutante than real diamonds," the saleswoman had said. Tessa longed to show off to somebody, but when she got down to the hall, the manservant told her Miss Bobbingsford had indeed come in and gone out again soon afterwards. Her father and Arabella were dining out, it seemed. So Tessa could only sigh, peep in the hall mirror again and ask him to find her a taxi. When it arrived, the driver took one look at her, then jumped down from his seat and helped her carefully inside. "We mustn't crush this, must we?" he remarked, settling her white spindrift round her knees. Tessa smiled as she thanked him, bubbling over with radiant anticipation. How gorgeous it was to be eighteen and going to your very first ball at a great house in fashionable London! The taxi crossed Hyde Park and proceeded down the Bayswater Road. Then it turned into a side street and drew up. Tessa looked out at a large block of flats, but to her surprise the driver opened the door for her. "I don't think this is right," she told him. "I want to go to Harringby House." "This is it, miss." "Are you sure?" Tessa asked in bewilderment. "I thought -" "Harringby House," he repeated. "See, it's written up over the entrance door." Tessa saw he was right, so slowly she got out to walk across the pavement into the hall. The porter nodded to her cheerily. "Seven-two-four, miss? I'll take you up."

The lift shot her to the eighth floor and the porter indicated one of the blank numbered doors along the corridor. Nervously, a queer little niggle in her heart, Tessa rang the bell. The door flew open to emit a burst of jazz and conversation and noisy laughter. A young man in a violet cardigan and black jeans stood there. "Come in, darling," he began, then stopped to raise his eyebrows. "Lost your way?" he added. "I mean - that glossy opulence and swish ..." As Tessa stared at him, a girl detached herself from the crowd in the inner room and came to the door. "Now what is it, Rodney? Oh, hello! Are you looking for somebody ?" "Yes. Miss Lilas Lawrence, please. If this is the right place?" "Lilas! Liii-las!" the girl called, and waved. She was tiny and rounded, with blue-shaded eyes and vivid mouth and a mini-dress of flowered-patterned cotton. "Lilas! Somebody wants you. Come over here, sweet, and leave the punch-bowl to Glynis for a minute." Lilas disentangled herself from the crowd and came to the doorway. She was dressed in tight-fitting crimson pants and a cyclamen silk shirt, thick gold bracelets on her wrists, heavy and barbaric. In one hand she carried a large wooden mixing-spoon. "What is it, Pook? I was just measuring out the brandy. Oh, it's you, Tessa! What are you standing here for? Do come in. Really, Pook, you are an incomparable zany! Don't you recognize my celebrated relation? She's been having her photograph in all the papers for simply weeks past. It's Tessa Chievers!" "Oh, yes. The girl from that funny island you were telling us about. We wanted to meet her, didn't we ?" Lilas giggled as she turned to the frozen Tessa, still on the threshold, one hand clutching the collar of her emerald coat. It seemed as though the kaleidoscope of colour and sound and faces in the background was settling

itself and coming nearer to her, pressing in to confront and inspect her. It was only with an effort that Tessa held her ground. "Believe it or not, Tessa darling, this is your hostess, Pook Cheviot! And her husband Rodney -" Lilas indicated the wearer of the violet cardigan, who waved a hand. "Come along and have a drink and meet people. I'm in the middle of brewing the punch. Colin's by the window somewhere. Why are you all decked out Christmas-tree style, though? Are you going on somewhere else when you leave us ?" "I - I'm dressed for the ball," Tessa faltered. Two men had come up to stare at her curiously and she also felt other interested eyes upon her gown. "The ball. You know." "I don't, angel. What ball are you talking about ?" "Your ball. When you asked me to come, you said you were going to have a real ball tonight... I'm sure you did." Lilas looked at her cousin for a moment, then went off into peals of laughter. "A real ball! Listen to her. How mixed-up can you get, darling? I said we were having a party and it would be a real ball. That's only an expression, Tessa. A few words in the native idiom. It just means having fun. Enjoying ourselves, dancing and drinking and so on. Surely you realized that? ... You didn't? But how absolutely gorgeously naive! - Johnny, this joke is good , enough for your gossip column in the Morning Dispatch ! - Jasmine, did you ever think it would be possible? It's simply made the evening for me. But completely!"

CHAPTER V PEOPLE clustered round Tessa as she stood there, still feeling as though she had been rooted to the spot. Crimson flags were flying in her cheeks, but she managed to keep her head high with tremendous effort. Everybody laughed and chattered as Lilas explained this fabulous joke, which was apparently adding hugely to the general merriment of the party. Bette and Jo and Dennis and Kay and Toni all thought it deliciously amusing. Comment swirled round Tessa like a frothing stream. "My dear, if you wrote that situation into a TV script, they'd jeer, but simply jeer!" - "Probably a local custom on these Mediterranean islands, sweet!" "Could there be another publicity gimmick in it, I wonder?" Tessa put her hand to her forehead for a moment, longing to brush them all away with their light, rapid voices and their expensive casual clothes. Then suddenly Colin was there and everything came into steady focus again. His blue eyes were smiling at her in the way she had longed to see, but now it did not seem to give her any pleasure. "Hello, Tessa," he said. "I've been looking forward to seeing you again and having a proper exchange of news. How are you getting on in London ?" He took her limp hand. "That's a truly superb gown," he added, "and a touch of your favourite colour, I notice! Good for you." "All right," Tessa said bitterly, "go on. Laugh at me. Everybody else is." "What, because of a small misunderstanding? Surely you aren't going to worry about a trifle like that ?" "A-trifle?" "Well, it isn't a tragedy, is it? Actually you look enchanting. Now come along and have a cup of Lilas's punch. I see she's started to perform the final rites over the bowl. Her brews are generally excellent." It was so matter-of fact, Tessa found herself instinctively moving forward with him, crossing the crowded room to the long table draped with vivid orange cotton' where Lilas and two other girls were stirring an enormous

glass basin. A young man with a guitar was standing beside them, and as Lilas dipped a cup in and held aloft the first libation, he started to play Sweet Poison Blues. Lilas threw the measure over him before she began to fill cups for the other guests who gathered round. Tessa, unused to such occasions, found the atmosphere hot and breathless, strongly redolent of cigarette smoke and assorted perfumes, but nobody else appeared to be affected in the least. "There you are," Colin said as he handed Tessa a cup. "Happy days. May the sun always shine for you. Are you settling down in London now?" "I suppose so - Oops! I beg your pardon," she murmured to a jostling young couple who were wreathed in each other's arms. "Can I -?" Colin was drawing her away from the buffet and out to the side of the room where congestion was less. "Thank you. Yes, I'm trying to settle, but of course London isn't a bit like Raltia, or even Naples." "Is that nostalgia or relief?" Colin wondered. "I'll allow this shindig isn't much like your birthday festa, though. What did you think of my pictures of that ?" "Well, they certainly altered my life drastically," Tessa answered. "As soon as they got printed in the newspaper and people saw them and remembered who Daddy was, I mean. I still have to keep pinching myself." 'The power of the Press," Colin smiled. 'Things of that kind do sometimes happen through publicity. Still,I'm glad the outcome has been satisfactory for you." "Yes, I'm a different girl from the one who helped you to take those photographs," Tessa agreed. "You know, I never imagined for a moment that you were a professional photographer. You didn't even have a big camera." "You mean a kind of set-up with a black cloth and plates and a squeegee thing for the shutter? Nobody does these days, Tessa. We all use minis. Remember the one I showed you ? They give the best results by far."

"Yours did all right with us, didn't it? Luciana was thrilled to bits when she saw herself. She's pasted up the newspaper cutting on the wall next to her bed." "Were you pleased, too?" he persisted. 'That's the main thing." "Yes. Since it was your pictures that brought me home to England in the end. It was funny how I talked to you about wanting to come back and how I was planning to work for Mr. Ganni at the hotel all summer to try to save up the fare. Now here I am with hardly any effort, and I've all the money in the world I want." "You have?" Colin was looking at her in surprise. 'This is interesting. Tell me more." "Well, when I saw Uncle Robert again he asked me to come to his office in the City, and it appears my mother had left me a lot of money I didn't know about. Daddy had rushed off abroad before any of Mummy's affairs were settled, it seemed. And of course nobody knew where he was, so I just wasn't aware of my legacy. Neither was Daddy." "Yes, I understand. Sir Robert came round to me as soon as your pictures were printed to ask me how you were living. So now you're an heiress? I'm glad for you too. Nobody deserves it more after that existence you led on Raltia." Tessa found she could laugh. Everything was settling down comfortably now because Colin was with her again. She was no longer tense and nervous, a stranger who did not fit among them, but a girl in her own gay right. "It does seem funny to look back," she said. "Just fancy, I didn't even have one respectable dress, and now I've a wardrobe full. But I'm still keeping that pretty' cotton you bought me. You were really terribly kind to me, Colin." "If you think that, Tessa, will you do me a little favour in return ?" he asked. "Why, you know I will. What is it, Colin ?"

"Come along to my studio as soon as you can. Tomorrow if possible. And sit for me." Before Tessa could reply, Lilas turned round. She wore pinkish-purple shadow on her eyelids matching the tones of her shirt, and Tessa thought how queer yet how fascinating it was. Her smile was brilliant as she flashed it at them. "What gives, my love?" she enquired. "Dating my little cousin already ? How do you know I shan't need you around tomorrow myself?" "You did say you were modelling beachwear for the next three days," Colin answered, "And I want to get some straight pictures of Tessa just as soon as I can. The new Tessa, I mean." "Ah, yes," Lilas nodded. 'The Most Unusual Debutante This Season. Splendid caption too. You'll be able to make all the glossies, I should think. Not to mention the daily papers." "But I'm not a debutante," Tessa began, only to be brushed aside. "Of course you are, my angel. Arabella Cope-Dawlish is organizing it all for you. Didn't you know? She adores giving parties and things. You're in for some hectic weeks, Tessa. We don't go to curtsey at Buckingham Palace any more, but we do show our paces on the Society roundabouts just the same." "I'm going to study," Tessa declared. "We haven't decided what I'm to take yet, but whatever I go in for, it'll keep me too busy for a lot of social whirling. I want to get myself a useful job." "But naturally, sweet. Everybody works these days. It's dizzy. It's done. Look at me for. instance. And Maureen with her science and Bette over there who goes for sculpture. Nigel! Here for a minute. Tessa is aching for somebody to dance with, so show her a new step or two." Nigel stretched out a hand in silence and drew Tessa away. The next moment she was jogging wildly up and down in his grasp, round and back again, sideways and all ways while the rhythm of the tango throbbed out. She wondered whatever dance they were supposed to be doing, and

enquired, but Nigel only frowned abstractedly and went on with his energetic gyrations in silence. Tessa decided she didn't like him. His beard was untidy and he had an outsize bow at his collar instead of a tie, made of some shining brown fabric that glittered metallically as he moved. His hands were hot and unpleasant too. Tessa stopped and said clearly: "I'm sorry, but I don't do this dance. Please excuse me." He merely scowled at her, then swung round to seize another girl. Tessa turned at the sound of a man's laugh and saw Colin's blue eyes regarding her with frank amusement. 'That put him in his place, Tessa!" "Well, it isn't what I call dancing. Though there's hardly room for it in any case. Are parties in London always so noisy and crowded as this ?" "Some are. Depends who gives them. Pook and Rodney go in for the gay crowd. They're a lively pair. Do I take it you aren't; enjoying yourself?" "It isn't quite what I expected," Tessa hedged. "I don't mean to be rude to your friends, of course. It was kind of them to invite me. I expect it's me, not being used to London yet. And it's so hot in here." "I agree with you. Let's go outside and get ourselves a breath of air. I haven't talked with you properly yet either." They made their way through the room, jostled and pushing automatically. Colin led the girl into the little hall and along to the end of it where a french door gave access to a tiny roof garden perched among the chim- ney-pots. There were a few shrubs in pots and a hanging basket of geraniums and the cool air sweeping round them. Tessa drank it in gratefully. "Good, isn't it?" Colin remarked. "A spot of peace after the rat-race of the day." "I suppose you're terribly occupied all the time," Tessa said. "You're a celebrity, aren't you ?"

"Let's say a reasonably successful photographer. One who means to get right to the top soon." "I'm sure you will." "Thanks for the confident tone, dear!" "It's a queer coincidence - your being engaged to Lilas when she's my cousin, I mean." "A fortunate one, Tessa. When I showed her the Raltia pictures and mentioned Tarquin Chievers, she knew at once who he was. That set the whole thing in train." "So I ought to be grateful to Lilas? I see. You're deeply in love with her, I expect." "Well, a man doesn't generally want to marry a girl unless she does appeal," Colin smiled. "And Lilas is utterly fascinating. You must be thrilled." "We came out to talk about you, Tessa dear, not me. Will you report at the studio tomorrow and sit for me, please ?" "All right. If you wish, Colin." "I do. At eleven, then. I'll tell Dorothy to expect you. Wear something plain, but bring that dress along too. A few more hit pictures and you'll find yourself one of the most sought-after lovelies of the year. Wouldn't you like that, Tessa?" "I'll tell you when it happens. If it ever does." She leaned against the iron rail, looking out over the panorama of roofs and steeples and skyscrapers, etched clearly in the moonlight. "What a marvellous view this is!" she went on quickly. 'That must be Westminster Cathedral. And is that Buckingham Palace? I shall have to go and watch the Changing of the Guard there. There

seems such a lot I have to learn about my native London yet. Roger Seagrave has promised to send me a guidebook. I certainly need one." "Seagrave? You mean that City type who works for Lilas's father?" "Yes. I met him at Uncle Robert's office. I expect you know him quite well." "I've seen him at the Lawrences' house once or twice," Colin replied. "Not that we've much in common. He's the executive desk man. I'm not." "No. I understand the difference. You're ambitious in another way. Lilas must be very proud to be engaged to you. She's so beautiful too. Sensational, I suppose you'd call her." "Outstanding - yes," he agreed. "And she's a top model. Knows all the right people and has an influential father to boot. What more could a man want ?" "But, Colin! You love her too. Don't you ?" "He'd be a queer fish whose pulse didn't leap when Lilas was around! You'll come to the wedding? You do know we're to be married early in August? Probably Lilas will have you for a bridesmaid along with Maureen. Though I don't think she's got down to planning the details yet." He looked at her sharply. "You're shivering, Tessa. Are you cold ? Perhaps we'd better go inside again. Now don't look so apprehensive! I'll protect you from all these jungle creatures!" "You must think me a silly little idiot," Tessa remarked as they regained the hall, "but they're all so unexpected. I've never met people like these before." "You'll get used to them," Colin assured her. "And as it happens, I think you're a very sweet and natural person. Not silly at all." That gave her some confidence again. She went back into the hot smoke-hazed room with her head high and the determination to carry things off. She found herself discussing Italian cooking with Dennis, and to her surprise, Nigel suddenly joined them and offered his opinions. It seemed he was a painter, well-known at the Positano summer school. She danced with

Tim and told Pook about her father's new portrait and had cheese fondue and frothy beer in a crystal goblet with Johnny who wrote the gossip column for the Morning Dispatch. He drove her home, her great white skirt crushed into the front seat of his sports car, hair flying wildly. When they reached the house, Johnny got out first and, opening the door, lifted her bodily out and deposited her neatly on the steps. Then he kissed her, expertly and non-committally. "We must meet again soon," he told her. "I like girls who look as innocent as you do, even if it is only a pose. Good night, sweetheart. I'll be calling, you up." Tessa stood watching him roar away down the street. She became aware that the door was already standing open and that Bobs was holding it, regarding her with a broad smile. "Come in, my dear," Bobs said. 'To think Arabella wondered whether I ought to tell you about the ways of the world, too! You seem to be getting along quite competently, anyway. So you went and bought yourself the ballgown after all ?" "Yes. I - I couldn't resist it. I was going to tell you earlier, but you weren't in the house. I hope you're not offended?" "Why should I be? It's your own money. You had a good time, I take it? A fabulous one, as young people say these days." "Exactly, Bobs. It was a party given by some friends of Colin and Lilas. Wasn't it nice of them to ask me ?" "Clever. You're pretty and affluent and you're something new in debutantes. With your romantic story and all. You're going to be a social success, I'm convinced. Now come into the library and have a hot drink with Arabella and me before you go to bed." So Tessa had to sit down in a deep leather chair and chat with the two women for a while. She also learnt that Lady Cope-Dawlish had helped

Tarquin move into his new studio apartment. "He must get to work as soon as possible, you see, dear. While interest in him is still strong." "I'll go round and see him tomorrow," Tessa declared, but Arabella shook her head. "No, wait for a few days, Tessa. It's better he shouldn't be disturbed until this portrait is really under way. It's Lord Herison who's sitting. The Minister for Internal Affairs. If Tarquin does something outstanding, as I'm sure he will, he'll step back into the place he had when he disappeared. Acclaimed again as our leading portrait artist, in fact. So you'll understand how important it is for him to be left alone for the moment." When Tessa finally went upstairs, Bobs followed her and put a small brown paper parcel into her hands. "Present from another of your boy-friends," she explained. "Young Roger Seagrave. He brought it round himself about nine o'clock. When I told him you'd gone out his face fell a mile. He says he's going to telephone you, though." Tessa was not surprised when she opened the parcel to find a lavishly illustrated book about London. She put it down on her bedside table, thinking what a friendly gesture it was. Roger was a comfortable kind of person and it was nice to have his interest. She had made Tarquin the centre of her world for so long, caring for him and considering his every need and wish, that she had a sense of void now he had been removed from her orbit. Still, one did not expect Tarquin Chievers to behave like ordinary men. Carefully Tessa got out of her beautiful gown and laid it over the chaise-longue at the foot of the bed. Then she sat down beside it to think about her evening all over again. Snowball jumped up and she lifted him into her arms, holding him there but with her thoughts far away. It had been wonderful to see Colin again and talk to him, but bitter-sweet joy. If those were the kind of people he liked, how could she ever hope to compete? True, he had told her she was sweet, but that wasn't the same thing.

Roger Seagrave rang her up next morning. "I wondered if you were free for lunch today?" he enquired, but Tessa had to reply: "I'm afraid I'm not. I'm just off to have some photographs taken, as a matter of fact." "I see. Well, how about dinner tonight? If nobody else has got in first." "I could come then," Tessa informed him, and heard his delighted "Splendid!" along the line. "May I take you along to a little old Thames-side pub I know? Introduce you to some of the local colour there. I'm sure you'd enjoy it." "Thank you. I'd love it," Tessa decided. Colin wouldn't be asking her to spend the evening with him anyway. He had Lilas for a companion. The day after toQ-tmorrow would be Saturday, and Tessa had promised to visit the Lawrences' home for the weekend. "Your aunt is looking forward to seeing you again," Robert had told her, and Tessa had smiled inwardly, thinking that Lady Lawrence must have changed her ideas then along with her title. Now Tessa found herself hoping Colin would not be there too, yet half fearing he would, because Lilas would certainly bring him in tow if she proposed to join the party. It wasn't easy for Tessa to watch her fascinating cousin appropriating Colin so possessively when she loved him so desperately herself. The lover the stars had sent her indeed! That ancient magic of Raltia did not operate in the sophisticated outside world, it seemed. Bobs saw Tessa off to Colin's studio, dressed in a new brown suit, accompanied into the taxi by a collection of boxes and a suitcase and Snowball, who refused flatly to be left behind. As she alighted in Comberry Street, Tessa's heart was beating fast. There was something so intimate and special about seeing Colin in his own home for the first time. She walked up the steps and rang the bell. A girl in a blue overall opened the door. "Good morning, Miss Chievers," she said briskly. "I'm Dorothy. Give me that case. I'll show you where you can change. Dog as well ?" "Oh, he's only here for company," Tessa explained.

They went along a narrow hall and down a short staircase. Dorothy opened a door and ushered Tessa into the little dressing-room with its full-length mirrors and racks. "Here you are. Just ring that bell if you find you want me to come along and give you some help. Light make-up only, please. No rouge." "I never wear it." "Good. Mr. Kenward dislikes it. Spoils the shadow, you know. I'll be back for you in ten minutes, then." Tessa reflected how efficient and businesslike it was. Very different from the lazy sun-warmed days on Raltia when Colin had aimed his camera just as the fancy took him. When she presently emerged behind Dorothy again, wearing the ballgown and jewellery, Tessa felt distinctly nervous. Snowball seemed affected by the atmosphere too. He retired to a corner of the dressing- room and stayed there pretending to sleep. Tessa followed her guide into the studio, a large white-walled room with blank canvas screens and a multitude of lamps, their wires and cables trailing all over the bare floor. Bill Janes was standing there in his shirt sleeves. He grinned at her cheerily. "Hello, Tessa. Buon giorno. How's tricks with you? Settling down in London?" "Why, Bill! Do you work here, then ?" "Sure do. I'm general dogsbody for Colin. Have you forgotten? - Here she is!" he added as the photographer came in. Inevitably Tessa's heart skipped a beat. She smiled at Colin happily and he nodded abstractedly, studying her face with his brows drawn together. Then he told her to stand quite still and walked slowly all round her. Dorothy handed him what Tessa thought of as a tape-measure and he proceeded to hold it against Tessa's face. Screens were put up behind her, adjusted and moved again. Tessa waited patiently, silently, glad to do Colin's bidding, thinking what a perfectionist he was. He wore an old suede jacket over an open-necked shirt, all his energies

concentrated on his creative task. Tessa thought how exciting it was to discover yet another new facet of his beloved personality. An hour later she was ordered to change back into her brown silk suit and to leave off all ornament. Colin photographed her in this from several angles, but the effect for which he was striving still appeared to elude him. "Just look natural, Tessa," he commanded, but it was not so easy to do. Colin's frown deepened and he muttered to himself. Then he said to her: "It's not right yet either. I wonder if that bow on your jacket is the trouble. Perhaps if the thing was loose ..." He came over to adjust the tie which held her jacket together at the neck. Obediently Tessa lifted her face and Colin unfastened the bow so that the jacket fell open to reveal the line of her throat and the start of her gentle shoulder curves. They were standing very close together, shut away by the screens, alone in the studio now. Bill had departed and Dorothy had said she was going to the office to make some urgent telephone calls. The big room was cool and quiet, the silence lifting around the girl and the man like a rising tide. Tessa knew she was quivering despite herself as Colin put his fingers lightly against her cheek, turning it a little to alter the shadows on the plane. Then the fingers went down under her chin, tilting it upwards. Now Colin was looking at her intently, staring deep into her eyes as though he had only this moment become aware of her. Their gazes were interlocked and simply, instinctively, Tessa raised her mouth. Just as easily Colin bent his head and kissed her. It was nothing like the casual kiss of parting on the Raltian mountainside. This was the salute of a man paying his tribute to a girl he found desirable; and inexperienced as Tessa was, she could recognize the difference. A thrill of sheerest joy ran through her. She put up her arm and wound it about Colin's neck, pressing him closer as she kissed him back again. Then his arms were holding her too so she could feel his heartbeats in rhythm with her own. Their lips met to cling passionately, with all the sweet rapture she had been longing to find out but had never tasted before. This was the moment of fulfilment. Everything she had dreamed of and longed for when she stood beneath the Mediterranean stars and wished so ardently. But suddenly Colin was thrusting her away from him.

"No," he said abruptly. "No. It's impossible ... I'm sorry, Tessa. Forgive me. Such a crazy lapse." "But I wanted you to kiss me, Colin ... it was wonderful." "Cheap on my part, I'm afraid. A photographer shouldn't allow himself to get carried away by pretty sitters. You're far too tantalizing, my dear. Although I know you don't mean to be." His tone changed sharply. "Now back to business. I must put this composition together." He went to his cameras and lamps, and meekly Tessa turned, sighing, to pose beside the screen once more. Before Colin had finished, Dorothy reappeared to announce that Miss Lawrence was waiting in the office. 'Tell her we'll be along in a few minutes," Colin replied. "Lunch, I suppose?" "Yes. You're going to Wong Lu's," Dorothy said. "Miss Lawrence informed me that she feels definitely Oriental today. I've booked your table." "You'll join us, of course, Tessa?" Colin invited. "Bill can complete the foursome. Make it a bigger table, then, Dorothy, please." However Lilas felt, she certainly looked Western elegance personified in her dark blue dress with a huge swag of gilt beads picking up the colour of her hair. As Tessa and Colin came into the office, she rose to wind her arm tenderly through her fiance's and greet him with a kiss on the chin. " 'Lo, darling one," she murmured. "Surprise, surprise! I've escaped from bikinis and beach towels until three o'clock, so you can buy me chow mein and water- lilies today. 'Lo, Cousin Tessa. Picture session quite satisfactory? But then naturally it was when Colin was in charge." As she raised her hand to touch his cheek, Tessa caught the flash of the diamonds on her left hand. It seemed like a warning signal. They walked round to Sloane Street and the Chinese restaurant with gilt characters across its discreet black facade. Inside were bamboo-lined walls and blackwood furniture and dragon-lamps and smiling yellow-faced

waiters. The plump old proprietor came up to bow to them and suggest the dishes of the day. "Sweet and sour pork for me," Bill decided. "Tessa wants to try the bean soup, I gather." "And what else ?" Colin asked. "Chow mein or chop suey or the Pekin duck trimmed with a thousand vegetables ?" Tessa settled for duck, explaining that she just had to see if so many kinds of vegetables really did appear. "How could they?" Lilas asked. "It's all phoney here. Dizzy for the moment, though. There'll be another idea in restaurants on top soon. That image-thing you're staring at isn't real. It's only cheap plaster." "It makes for fun," Tessa said. "What exactly is chop suey anyway ?" Bill told her while Lilas chatted to Colin in a low voice. They sat on a divan at one side of the table while Tessa and Bill had the opposite cushions. The girl could not help feeling that Lilas would have preferred to be alone with Colin and was annoyed by the presence of another couple. It took some of the gaiety out of sampling all the unusual food, for the duck was certainly delicious even though the vegetables did fall short of the promised number. Next they had little almond cakes with ginger, and finally pale tea served in delicate porcelain bowls, flower-petals floating on the top. Tessa was thinking what a pretty notion this was when realization suddenly smote her. Hastily she put down her tea with a little cry of distress. "What's the matter?" Lilas asked, glancing up. "Oh, dear! It's Snowball." "Not till winter, angel. This is June." "I mean my dog. He's called Snowball. I left him in the dressing-room and forgot all about him. He'll be so unhappy. I must go and get him right away."

"Relax," Bill said. "The pooch will be okay. Dorothy will have found him when she went in to tidy up. She's probably stuffing him with biscuits at this very moment. She likes dogs." Tessa hesitated. "Well, I don't want to seem rude, but perhaps..." "Of course, my pet," Lilas interposed sweetly, "you run along now and collect your beast. You've finished your meal, after all. Bill can escort you. I'm staying to have a few private words with Colin." "Yes, I see," Tessa agreed, rising quickly. "Thank you, Lilas. And thank you for my lunch, Colin. It was very interesting. Maybe I'll see you both at Weybridge during the weekend." She made her face smile at them even though her, heart was not equally gay. "Maybe, who knows?" Lilas answered. "'Bye, then, Tessa. Don't do anything I wouldn't." Colin smiled back at Tessa before Bill escorted her out. "I think your pictures are going to turn out well," he told her. "Thanks for being so patient, Tessa. Goodbye." Sombrely Tessa walked into the midday sunshine at Bill's side. He made conversation for her, telling her how he joined the R.A.F. when he left school and now found his flying experience and knowledge of aerial photography highly useful in his job with Colin. Tessa answered politely, though her thoughts were focused elsewhere. She could not help wondering how she was going to support the constant pain of being forced to watch Colin and Lilas together and not allow anybody to suspect how much it was hurting her. She had better decide about her future job and start training for it right away, then she would be too busy elsewhere to see much of the couple. Tessa supposed her cousin and Colin would inevitably be invited to this grand party about which Lady Cope-Dawlish and Bobs kept talking - "So that you can meet the right people and they can meet you. Especially young men. A girl has to remember her future, of course. The choice of a husband is important even in these modern, casual days!" Tessa had said quickly that

she wasn't thinking about marriage at present, but the, two women had only smiled benignly. When she reached Colin's studio again, Tessa found Snowball sitting in the office, begging another chocolate finger from Dorothy and quite happy with life. Dorothy rang up for a taxi, but there was a twenty- minutes' delay. "Would you like to see upstairs while you're waiting?" Bill suggested. Eagerly Tessa accepted. Holding Snowball firmly in her arms, she followed through the door marked "Strictly Private" and up the stairs into the room which took up the whole first floor of the bijou house. The walls had been lined with pine panelling, its pale mellow tones the perfect background for some brilliant impressionist paintings. A deep settee and easy chairs were covered in rust-red fabric and there was a corner alcove with Oriental jades and soapstone carvings on the shelves. "We brought those back from Hong Kong and Indo-CWa," Bill said. "We went there to do a feature for a travel magazine." The side-table held a large photograph of Lilas, her eyes smouldering through a hazy veil which gave her a queerly seductive appearance. "Striking wench that," Bill remarked as he followed Tessa's glance. "Odd about her being your cousin." "Yes. Quite a coincidence. We're not alike, though." Bill smiled. 'That's true enough," he conceded. "You're the giver type and she's the taker. What's yours is mine and what's mine is my own. That's Lilas's slogan in life." Tessa stood holding Snowball. "But she's terribly in love with Colin, Bill. It's plain." "Sure," he agreed. "She's certainly picked him for her man. Mind you, I'm not at all sure how the marriage will work out, but there it is." "Why shouldn't it succeed?" Tessa wondered. "He's in love with her too. And they'll have a home and everything they can reasonably need."

"Let's say Colin knows which side his bread is buttered," Bill replied. "Not that it matters much, because he's completely hooked now and Lilas won't let go. She's got what she wants and that's that." He was standing near the alcove and he picked up one of the jade figurines, turning it round in his fingers as he said evenly: "You're very interested in Colin, aren't you, Tessa ?" "Yes, I am." "You wouldn't think of taking him away from Lilas, I hope? Or making any play in his direction. That would be just too darn foolish." "Would it? Why?" "Lilas is as ruthless as they come. You wouldn't stand a chance against her methods. Not a little innocent like you. I know the lady. I've seen her dealing out her treatment to other people. You're far too sweet to get hurt, Tessa dear." She smiled in his direction. "Don't worry, Bill," she replied. "I'm not going to even try to separate them. There couldn't be any happiness from an act of theft. Not for me, at least. Besides, I'd want a man who came to me of his own free will and desire, not one I had to steal from somebody else.If you see what I mean." "Yes, I do, Tessa," he assured her. "Actually this romance is more complicated because Sir Robert Lawrence is going into business with Colin after the wedding, providing the capital to move out, of this place into a much larger studio. Colin will have assistants, additional equipment, a proper secretary and a publicity agent - all the things you need to become a Top Name. Our Colin is an ambitious lad, you know. Ah, here's your taxi bowling round the corner. I'll put you and Snowball into it."

CHAPTER VI IT was nearly a week before Tessa saw her father again. Even though her days had been crowded with new experiences and people she still worried about Tarquin, so finally Lady Cope-Dawlish had parted with his address. Tessa immediately rushed off to find a taxi and go there. It was a fashionable block of studio-flats just off the King's Road in Chelsea. A uniformed porter guarded the entrance, and as he conducted her inside Tessa thought about the lean-to shed on Raltia and smiled to herself. She went into a large, airy room, luxuriously furnished but still with the familiar smells of oil and paint and turpentine and varnish. There was a model throne draped in crimson velvet and an unfinished canvas on the easel. As Tessa was looking at it, Tarquin came in. He still seemed strange to Tessa without his beard, his hair short and almost smooth, wearing a dark linen jacket instead of a tattered shirt and jeans. As he bent to kiss her, Tessa caught the scent of some expensive face lotion. She wondered if it was yet another present from Lady Cope-Dawlish, who was lavishing so much upon her newly-discovered relations. "How are you, Daddy ? You look marvellous, I must say." "I'm in magnificent form, my dear. Well tended and well fed, thanks to Arabella. She's looking after everything for me." "I used to do that. Now I'm out of my job, I think. But she is amazingly kind and thoughtful in every way. You know about this party she's giving for me tomorrow night?" "Yes. It seems I have to be there too. It's a long time since I was host at any reception. I think I shall enjoy myself." "You're the host?" Tessa repeated. "Arabella says I'm to stand beside her as the guests arrive. After all, I am your father, and. she's there in lieu of your other parent, as it were. A charming gesture on her part, I feel. Don't you ?"

"Yes, very." "Now what do you think of Lord Herison ?" He was drawing Tessa back to the easel as he spoke. "They told me he was the most genial of politicians, but I could only see him as vague and shadowed, so I'm painting him darkly..." It was ten minutes before Tessa could turn the conversation back to her affairs again. Then she said quickly: "Daddy, I'm starting to train as a potter. I've enrolled at the crafts school already. I know it's not like painting, but I haven't any talent that way. As you've often told me. But I can do things with my hands. Do you remember how I used to help old Tomaso make his earthenware ? I liked that, so I thought I'd take it up properly." "Arabella did tell me something about it," Tarquin remarked casually. "It'll help to pass the time until you marry, 1 suppose." "I'm not contemplating matrimony. And this is a serious job. You can earn money at it." "You don't need to. You've an income of your own now." "But 1 want some occupation. I feel lost with nothing to do." "You'll probably find plenty to fill your time after the party," he said. "Arabella is producing quite a shoal of young men for you to meet. There'll be a lot of return invitations for you later on too. Did I tell you Hans Liebader is flying over from Vienna to see me next week ? He wants to find out if it's possible to arrange a loan exhibition of my work there in the autumn." He went on happily, and Tessa gave up the attempt. Not that she had ever expected her father to take much interest, though. She felt glad of the prospect of lessons and busyness. It would keep her mind from dwelling too much on Colin, although first she had to see him again with Lilas at her party. Naturally Lady Cope-Dawlish had invited them both, as well as Maureen, with whom • Tessa had renewed her acquaintance when she spent a not-too-cordial weekend at the Lawrences' house. They lived in Weybridge now, with amenities like a rose- garden and a three-car garage,

but Tessa still found her aunt prim-lipped and sternly dressed as ever. Watching her, Tessa suddenly realized why Lilas had chosen to become a fashion model. It was sheer reaction from all those dark utilitarian clothes in which her mother had covered her for so long. Lilas did not appear at home during Tessa's visit, for which the girl was thankful. Maureen, who now worked in a scientific laboratory, was there, but Tessa did not find her very congenial either and was glad when the time came for her to return to Kensington again. Tante Arabella received Tessa as though they had been separated for weeks instead of two days, and told her that arrangements for the party were well in hand. The double drawing-room was being skilfully disguised as a country garden by Dennis de Vaux, no less - he was a "must" at debutante affairs this season, it seemed. Tessa would stand in the hall beside Lady Cope-Dawlish to welcome the guests on arrival. "I shan't know most of them," Tessa observed, "except for my cousins and Colin and Roger Seagrave. I'm so glad you've invited him." "You seem attracted in that direction," her ladyshipsaid. "He definitely is. Still, it's quite suitable. His mother is Gerald Cullingham's younger sister. A very wealthy family. And he had excellent prospects with Sir Robert's firm, of course." "You've been out with him several times this week, haven't you ?'' Bobs asked. "Four times actually. To the theatre and to have dinner in Soho and driving to Kew on Sunday afternoon. And that wonderful orchestral concert at the Festival Hall last night. He met my train at Waterloo and took me along. It was simply glorious. I'd only heard Beethoven on records before." "Well, it's all most satisfactory," Lady Cope-Dawlish pronounced. "Wouldn't it be exciting if you got engaged to him during your first season? Let's see, it's almost June now. We could arrange the wedding for the end of July quite easily. A bit rushed perhaps, but then long engagements are right out of fashion these days. So, different from when I was a girl."

Finally Tessa managed to get a word in edgeways. 'Tante Arabella," she repeated, "I don't want to get married in a whirl. Why does everybody keep on thinking I have to be married, I wonder? I haven't a future husband in view in any case. Nobody, but nobody at all." The two older women only smiled and nodded at that, Bobs remarking that Tessa might change her mind when she had had some more social experience. Tessa went^up to her room thinking, not for the first time, that Tante Arabella seemed to have taken complete charge of the Chievers and their lives. There was a steely purpose and determination under her kindliness and generous surface charm. She took hold of you and swept you along, and for some curious reason Tessa failed to understand, she seemed to have made up her mind that Tessa must be matched off. As she undressed. Tessa decided that when her pottery studies were more advanced, she would leave this house and take a little furnished flat for herself somewhere near the school. Lady Cope-Dawlish surrounded her with every comfort and consideration, certainly, but that was overshadowed by the fact she could hardly call her soul her own. "There's a lot to be said for freedom and independence, Snowball," Tessa informed the little white dog at her feet. She felt glad Roger Seagrave was coming to her party. He was such a comfortable and sympathetic person to have around. He treated her with seriousness, and although he made it clear that he admired her, he never attempted to press the matter further. Very different from those passionate young Raltians like Domenico, for instance! If there was anything about which she needed help at this party, she could ask Roger and be sure he would respond without ever laughing at her ignorance either. She only hoped Tante Arabella wasn't going to spoil their pleasant relationship with coy hints and innuendoes, or even a frank enquiry as to how they were "progressing" together. Tessa prepared for the grand evening well in advance. At Bobs' recommendation she spent the whole morning in Alphonse's salon, having her hair done, her nails rose-tipped and a special face treatment designed to make her glowing and radiant. Then Bobs told her to rest during the afternoon - "sitting up, mind, because you mustn't spoil your appearance

now." It was difficult to relax with all the distracting sounds of activity floating up from the floors below, and Tessa found herself thinking dreamily of siesta-time on Raltia, where people really did close their eyes to ease away their cares in the hot sunshine. At six o'clock Tessa had a light meal, then she bathed and dressed. Lady Cope-Dawlish and Bobs both came in to inspect the finished product, as Tessa privately called it. The pink satin dress showed off her figure, every line cunningly stressed. Tessa wondered if she now looked more like Lilas, who habitually wore this revealing line. She had green-shaded eyelids herself tonight and her face was cleverly pale, just touched with the faintest rose to pick up the tone of her dress. All her sun-tan had been faded off with a cream Alphonse's beauty specialist had provided a couple of weeks ago. She had high- heeled Italian sandals of gold kid and a bag to match and a pair of quaintly-twisted gilt ear-rings from an antique jewellery shop. "You really want a brooch as well to make it perfect," Tante Arabella pronounced. "I'll lend you one." "Thank you, but it won't be necessary," Tessa said quickly. "I have the ideal one." She found her mother's turquoise piece and fastened it on. It was appropriate that she should wear it tonight. As she stared at herself in the full-length mirror, Tessa tried to imagine what Naomi Chievers would have thought of her daughter now, facing all these strangers and the problems this new mode of life was bringing. "Your launching," as Lady Cope-Dawlish kept describing it, seemed full of pitfalls for unwary feet. Sitting on her Mediterranean rock, Tessa had pictured London as a gay romantic place in which you went from one delightful experience to another, enjoying yourself and having fun. But it turned out that you had to observe all kinds of strict materialistic rules and traditions, knowing the right people and doing the right things and being matter-of-fact to a positively astonishing degree. Even having to assess a man according to whether he was moneyed or "suitable", ignoring the question of whether he made your pulses beat faster or not and if he was the kind of man you could love. Tessa wondered how Tante Arabella would have assessed Colin if he had been unattached and a suitor. If only he had! Tessa went downstairs with Lady Cope-Dawlish, rustling delicately inside clouds of grey chiffon, and stood beside her in the hall which was decorated

with masses of roses and azaleas. "You look fine, just fine," the coloured manservant whispered as he passed, and Tessa smiled at him gratefully. Then Tarquin came, a tall handsome figure in his immaculate dinner jacket to which he had added an ornate Regency waistcoat of flowered satin. Another man would have seemed absurd, but Tarquin carried it off flamboyantly and merely looked distinguished. He kissed his daughter's cheek and Tante Arabella's beringed hand. Her red piled- up curls gleamed under the chandelier as she moved to give him a light kiss on the cheek in return. Then she laid her hand on his arm with a possessive little gesture, passing a gay remark. Tessa watched them, and suddenly, unexpectedly, the truth about the situation struck her. Tante Arabella was in love with Tarquin. Perhaps she had always carried the torch for him right through the years. It explained her eagerness to help him in every way and to entertain Tessa herself. And now she was giving this launching party so that Tessa could find a husband and get married as quickly as possible, or at worst make some girl friends with whom she could share a flat and amuse herself. Then Arabella and Tarquin would marry at last. Tarquin always needed somebody around, to wait on him and admire his painting and listen to his talk and take all responsibilities off his shoulders. Tessa saw the whole picture as completely as though it had been flashed before her on a screen. But there was no time to mull it over in her mind. The guests were beginning to stream in. Tall people, short people, old people, young people, middle-aged people, men and girls of her own age. Tessa soon gave up trying to remember all their names as they were introduced to her. They all gave her the same kind of smile and said much the same thing as they passed on. Lady Cope-Dawlish was in her element and Tarquin received tremendous attention, obviously enjoying the tributes too. His much-publicized "return to life" had made him an interesting figure. Maureen Lawrence came in with her mother, but Lilas was late. She drifted in beside Colin, wearing a shimmering creamy dress that seemed to have been moulded round her, so low-cut that Lady Cope-Dawlish's eyes dilated for a moment. Lilas touched her hostess's hand with limp politeness, then flashed her brilliant smile at Tessa. "Hello, angel," she said. "Slightly different from that other party, tonight." Colin's hand took Tessa's for a

moment as he made the usual greetings. Then they both went on upstairs and Tessa was left with an odd sense of disappointment. When Roger Seagrave arrived, Tessa greeted him with relief. "You look marvellous, Tessa," he told her. Then he lowered his voice to ask: "How are you doing? Everything okay ?" "I can't remember all the names. I keep on getting mixed up. Do you think I haven't got any social sense ?" "Of course you have. I shouldn't bother about their names anyway. They'll sort themselves out as you get to know them better." "Do you really think so ? I hope you're right." "Now what are you two whispering about?" Tante Arabella interposed playfully. "I expect you're anxious to start dancing, aren't you, dear? Well, I think we might ^11 go upstairs now, Tarquin. Everybody seems to have arrived." She led the way with the painter, holding his arm, and Tessa followed with Roger. As usual he was a comforting rock to which she could cling. He took her in his arms and they danced. Then, "You're supposed to look happy tonight," he chided her gently. "Aren't you enjoying your party?" "Ye - es, I suppose so. Only it's such a crowd. I don't mean to be ungrateful to Tante Arabella, who's so kind about it, but just between ourselves, Roger, I'd love it much better if it was just a few friends. This is so overwhelming, but a dozen or so nice people would be perfect. People like you, I mean." "You think I'm nice, then ?" he asked. "Indeed I do. My good friend Roger." He bent his head closer. "I could be more than a friend, Tessa," he said in a low voice. "I want to be, in fact." "You do ?" she echoed, startled.

"Yes. Because I've fallen in love with you - No, don't say anything about it now. This isn't the moment. I realize that. I just felt you might - well, care to know how I feel." "Thank you, Roger." It was all she could answer, and fortunately the music stopped then. She danced the next number with her father and then went on to men she had just met for the first time, receiving compliments about her dress, wondering what Roger would say to her when the right moment did come and how she should reply. Wondering too where Colin was and why he did not come and ask her to dance. She had caught sight of him partnering Maureen and Lilas and Lady Cope-Dawlish, but now he seemed to have disappeared. Surely he had not left so early? When Tessa did find Colin again, she was standing at the buffet in the dining-room, a glass of champagne in her hand which she sipped cautiously while she listened to the endless chatter of the celebrated Johnny who wrote the gossip column for the Morning Dispatch. He went on complaining that he could never fix a date with her when he rang up. "What do you do that keeps you so busy, beautiful ?" he demanded. "You're what ? Making pots and vases ? 1 don't believe it!" "Perfectly true. I'll send you one to put in your office." "I'd rather have a photograph of you in a swimsuit," he grinned. "But you're still my tops, Tessa. Know what? Wait for it, now! I'm going to name you in the column as Number One Debutante of the Year." He paused dramatically, evidently waiting for response, so Tessa thanked him courteously, since she presumed that this was expected. Johnny began to hoot with delighted laughter. "You're the only girl of the whole caboodle out this season who wouldn't yell with joy at that label," he told her. "My, you're a funny naive little piccaninny too. The Dispatch's Number One Deb, and it hardly means a thing to you! The boys in the news-room will never believe this."

"I am pleased, Johnny. Of course I am," Tessa said hastily. "Oh, here's Lilas!" she added. "And Colin." "Hi," Johnny greeted them. "Don't you think you're going to separate me from my Tessa, because you're not. Have one of these lobster patties, sweetheart mine ? Or do you fancy an asparagus whatsit instead ?" Lilas smiled at her cousin. "Good party," she approved. "For a girl who hasn't even engaged herself a professional publicity agent, you certainly are successful, Tessa darling." "With me on her side shouting for her, she can't go wrong," Johnny declared, and filled his mouth with smoked salmon canape. "Spare a few lines for me as well, angel. After all. I'm not exactly an old horse-face myself, am I ?" "No," Johnny replied calmly, "but you're just one more in the same old pattern. The way all the models get themselves up nowadays. I see so many of you, I'm getting bored with the type. Now Tessa is completely different, fresh and unspoiled. That's why I adore her. Don't you agree with me, Colin ?" There was an awkward silence. Tessa realized that Johnny was enjoying the discomfiture he had caused, with deliberately malicious pleasure. She caught her breath as Colin answered quietly: "Surely, Johnny: Tessa is a charmer. But her attraction is quite opposite from Lilas's. We can't all fall for the same thing, can we?" 'Tactfully spoken, my boy," Johnny grinned. "You prove your point. Tell you what now - brought your camera, I take it? Then get me an unusual pic of Tessa. Eating cheese straws or maybe choking on an olive or whatever you like, so long as it's out of the ordinary. I have it exclusive for the paper, and in return I'll give the hot-horse-faced Miss Lawrence a few lines as well. So take that scowl off your matt-powdered face, Lilas ducks." Before Colin could answer, Tessa did so. "I don't want to be photographed looking silly, thank you," she told Johnny. "And I think you're being

extremely rude too. Now excuse me, please. I have to speak to Roger Seagrave." She had just caught sight of him coming in their direction and moved forward quickly to meet him. He looked at the bright flags in her cheeks and asked: "What's wrong, Tessa? Has that journalist chap had one drink too many as usual and been disturbing you ?" "No, not me. He's being nasty to Lilas, though. He doesn't seem to care for her much." "I'm not surprised," Roger said. "I expect she hounds him for publicity all the time. She's merciless when she's on the chase for that." "Why?" Tessa wondered as they walked down the room. "Lilas doesn't really need to work at modelling for what it pays her." "No, but she loves to read about herself in the papers," Roger explained. "It builds up her image in her own mind. She's publicity-crazy, believe me." "But she's going to marry Colin soon. She'll settle down then, I suppose." "Settle down!" Roger smiled. "What gave you that idea? She'll be more in the forefront than ever as his wife with all the photographic fame he can bring her. Kenward sets the seal on her, as it were. And he's going to get a golden handshake from Sir Robert on the wedding day, so everybody should be happy. Now let me find you a plate of strawberries and cream, Tessa. And I don't mind if I join you too." They took the plates across to one of the little tables the caterers had brought, joined by two girls who Tessa managed to remember were called Rowena and Elizabeth and their brother whose name escaped her. People milled about, laughing, chatting. Between their figures Tessa got a passing glimpse of Lilas. She had taken out her jade holder and a man was lighting a cigarette for her. Fine-drawn, elegantly brittle, absolutely mistress of herself. How did you make yourself like that? Tessa wondered enviously. How learn to be provocative and arrogant and superbly poised? But the man was not Colin. He was nowhere to be seen.

Presently the trio in the drawing-room began to play for dancing again. As Tessa finished her first dance, she realized that Johnny was missing too. She commented on this to Bobs, who had been gallantly partnered by Tarquin in what he fondly imagined was a quickstep, now getting her breath back at the side of the room. "That newshound ?" Bobs said. "Colin Kenward took him off before midnight. I don't know if they intend to come back or not." "Did they say goodbye to Tante Arabella ? No ? How very peculiar!" Bobs lifted her shoulders. "Some people have strange notions about manners these days, Tessa." "Not Colin. He isn't rude. And Lilas is still here. Do you think they've quarrelled ?" "She doesn't look as though she's just lost her young man," Bobs replied. "She's over there. See her ?" Tessa gave up. A man whom Lady Cope-Dawlish had called "Malcolm, you dear lad," came to invite her on the crowded little floor for a cha-cha. They had just finished it when Colin suddenly appeared in the doorway, his mini-camera in his hand. Tessa paused to stare at him and their eyes met. "Don't worry," Colin smiled, "I shan't take any picture that makes you look silly. As a matter of fact, I drove Johnny round to my studio just now and placated him with one of those prints I made from your sitting last Friday. He's in his office now getting it into the paper." "Well, that will please Tante Arabella. She loves seeing me mentioned in newspapers and things." "It's a good study, Tessa. You have an interesting face, you know. Your masses and angles and planes are extremely pleasing." "I'm glad to hear it. Oh, this next is a tango, Colin. Aren't you going to ask me for it? You haven't danced with me once tonight yet."

"I'd love to dance with you, Tessa," he answered, "but the sad fact is I haven't time. I've come back again to take Lilas home. She told me one o'clock, and it's that now." "But it's early for a London party," Tessa declared. 'Tante Arabella says they always go on till two at least. Nobody else is leaving yet." "Sorry, Tessa dear, but there it is." "You danced with me a lot at my festa," Tessa remembered. "I did think you'd partner me tonight too." 'This is different from Raltia," he told her. 'That was a delightful interlude when my time was all my own. Now I'm back on the job and I have to think of many things." "Including Lilas, of course." "Yes, angel," Lilas agreed lightly as she joined them. "I must get my quota of rest every night, you know. Have to turn out fresh and clear-eyed again in the morning. Quite a difficult thing at this season, too. I get asked to so many of these deb affairs. Well, 'bye for now, Tessa. Nice little shindig." 'Thank you for coming to it, Lilas. Good night ... Good night, Colin... Good night." There was no fun left in the party after they had gone. Tessa danced a little more and applauded the band singer's solo and drank another glass of champagne, feeling utterly reckless and thoroughly miserable at the same time. She danced the final number with Roger and accepted his suggestion to drive down to the Sussex coast on Sunday. "I admit the scenery there isn't as beautiful as the Mediterranean," he said, "but I know a very pretty spot that's not overcrowded weekends. I think you might like it there." "I'm sure I shall," Tessa replied. "You always do choose attractive places for us."

"We'll be able to talk quietly together there," Roger added. "I want us to discuss the matter I mentioned to you earlier this evening." He had taken her hand in his, ostensibly to say good night now, but he did not relax his grasp. Tessa looked down at her imprisoned fingers unhappily. "Yes, I - I remember, Roger. But I'm not really ready yet. I've such a lot to learn and do, settling down in England, first, you see." It sounded lame even to her own ears, but Roger did not appear to notice that. He smiled at her tenderly, understandingly. "All right, Tessa," he said gently. "Don't fret. I'm not one of those impatient chaps. I shan't try to rush you along faster than you want to go. I can wait a little while if I have to do." "Thank you, Roger," she answered gratefully. "Will you call for me on Sunday, then? About ten? Yes; that'll be fine. And may I bring Snowball too? He hates me to leave him behind when I go out." Then she bade him good night. As the door closed behind the last guests, Tessa heaved a sigh of relief. She would never have believed an evening's pleasure could be so exhausting. It was much harder work than anything on Raltia had ever been, even helping in the vineyards at harvest-time. Her limbs ached and her eyelids were heavy with weariness and the soles of her feet seemed as though they were on fire. She sat down on the nearest chair, kicking off her sandals and wriggling her toes blissfully. Tarquin laughed as he kissed her good night and went out on his way home. Lady Cope-Dawlish accompanied him to the door and Tessa could hear them talking on the steps for a few minutes. Then Tante Arabella came back to regard her. "Tired, my dear?" she enquired. "Yes, of course you are. But it was all worth while, wasn't it? A most successful evening. Everybody spoke of you so well." "I'm glad to hear it."

"Young Roger Seagrave couldn't tear himself away from you, could he? Oh, I wasn't the only one to notice that!" She paused for a moment, but Tessa did not speak, so she went on: "Now there'll be lots of invitations to other parties coming in for you. Aren't you thrilled at the prospect of such a marvellous time ahead?" "I can't go to a lot of parties, Tante Arabella. My pottery lessons, you see." "Pooh, those are just a daytime amusement. Now wasn't Tarquin a splendid figure tonight? How well he looked.didn't he?" They were alone in the hall, Bobs having already climbed the stairs to bed. Tessa sat massaging her feet tenderly and looking at the woman in front of her. "You're fond of my father, aren't you ?" She asked. "Why, yes, my dear. I always have been. Apart from our relationship we were boy and girl sweethearts. I always hoped we'd marry, but it was not to be." "You're both free again now, though," Tessa remarked slowly. "It's possible for you to make up for those lost years. If you wanted it that way." Lady Cope-Dawlish smiled radiantly, in a manner that made her seem suddenly much younger and prettier. "Darling child!" she exclaimed. 'Tarquin felt you might not understand, but I was quite sure you would. How could anybody expect him to remain so lonely now ? Why, it wouldn't be reasonable, let alone kind. And you've always been such an affectionate and devoted little daughter to him." She leaned forward and implanted a moist kiss on Tessa's cheek. "We're all going to be terribly happy together," she declared. "Of course Tarquin must finish this important picture of Mark Herison before we can make any definite plans. But after that I think a very quiet ceremony and then a honeymoon in New York. Barriman is most anxious to see him there, you know. You can stay here with Bobs while we're gone. Unless you feel like

making some independent arrangements for yourself. You must think it over, dear, and let me know your ideas." "Yes," Tessa said as she rose, "I'll do just that. Good night - or rather good morning, Tante Arabella. I'm well and truly launched now, I take it ? That's all right, then."

CHAPTER VII TESSA had arrived in London ignorant in many ways and recognizing the fact. As weeks went by she acquired maturity and a shell of self-confidence. The pottery lessons helped her peace of mind considerably. She loved the atmosphere of the shabby old school and the satisfying feel of the clay in her hands, quickly achieving sufficient skill to create reasonable objects with it. At first her fellow-students regarded her with suspicion. "You're that Number One Deb!" a long-haired girl accused on Tessa's second day. "I suppose this is another gimmick to get yourself into the papers. Well, let me tell you we despise such nonsense here. We're serious workers." "So am I," Tessa replied simply. "Oh yeah ? Who do you think you're fooling ?" Tessa did not attempt to argue. She just absorbed herself in her lessons without making any more friendly overtures. It was nothing new to be alone. She had spent many hours like that on Raltia. The work was so interesting she did not even miss the chatter of the other students. Until one morning as she went into the canteen for coffee-break, preparing to carry her cup into a corner as usual, the long-haired girl, whose name was Nadia, silently held out a packet of cigarettes towards her. Tessa rarely smoked, but she took one now and a boy lit it for her. They started to discuss colour values, several others joined in, and then they were all amiable friends. Now, without words, Tessa was accepted. She could share the class jokes and poke fun at the teacher and eat sandwiches in the nearby park at lunch-time, talking about jazz and religion and films and art galleries and politics or whatever topic came up. Twice she was even invited to spend an evening at The Tender Trap, a basement-room in Pimlico where you drank frothy espresso and listened to records and indulged in a little uninhibited jiving as the spirit moved you. Then you went home by yourself on the bus. None of the other girls had been "launched" like herself, but Tessa found them more congenial than most of the debutantes to whose parties she had to go in return for having had them at her own. Invitations filled the mantelpiece of her room now. "Most satisfactory," Lady Cope-Dawlish

approved. "You're a great success, Tessa dear. Tarquin is pleased with you too." Tessa accepted that because she so rarely saw her father nowadays. She knew he went out with Tante Arabella a good deal and occasionally appeared at the house for a dinner. "You wouldn't be interested in our friends," Tessa was told then. "Just older people like ourselves." So dutifully she accepted some of the invitations. She went to a large charity dress show and a brilliant theatrical premiere and several "must events", as Lady Cope- Dawlish called them. She was taken to Ascot by her ladyship's sister, who had a small party. The hats and the flower-banked stands and the noisy merry crowd beyond the rails were all amusing, with the added thrill of cheering the Royal procession along the course and watching the horses later on. But somehow it didn't seem to be as intensely wonderful as it ought to have. You met the same people on all these occasions. Girls who had grown up together, gone to the same exclusive schools and had their own private catchwords and jokes. Young men escorts who wanted to talk about themselves and their careers all the time and generally to drive you back late at night in souped-up sports cars. Your hair blew on end with the speed, and then you found they were trying to make love to you. Apparently the idea was to keep one hand on the wheel and the other on the girl. Domenico had never been half so crude. There were things about her first "season" which Tessa enjoyed: wearing lovely clothes and always being prettily groomed and seeing famous people in celebrated places. Yet she felt there was still something more she needed. Social life without purpose was an empty business. She wanted to have the satisfaction of being useful, necessary to something or better still to somebody, not simply passing the time away. "I'm an outsider, that's what," Tessa said to Snowball one evening as they took a constitutional round the square. "I'm just not cut out for this butterfly life. Or for being a glamour girl either. You've got to start working at it very early, I think. I began too late. And the funny thing is I don't seem disappointed. Isn't it queer ?" There was nobody else to whom she could think aloud like this. Her friends at the school did not ask her to their own homes nor expect to come to hers. Bobs could be a shrewd confidant at times, but Lady Cope- Dawlish kept her

constantly busy. Lilas and Maureen had sent polite bread-and-butter letters after Tessa's party, but that was all. Tessa had not seen Colin since that night either, though his pictures of her had appeared in various papers and magazines. As July wore on she kept thinking about Raltia and how much jollier life had been there, with those evenings of talk and laughter round the fountain, the music and the sunshine and the flowers, the sea and the colour, and above all the warmhearted friendships, made up for the harder work of the day and you relaxed with the sense of freedom. To think she had ever longed to exchange that idyllic existence for London. If only she could go back again now, wiser and more experienced, with enough moneyto live comfortably somewhere in the town instead of on the mountain. And Colin beside her, her husband who was equally happy to share the golden days. It was a tender ridiculous little daydream because it could never come true, but it was sweet to dwell on it just the same. .. Cold reality shattered it one evening when Tessa came back from school to find a large white envelope waiting for her. Inside was a gilt-engraved invitation card on which Sir Robert and Lady Lawrence requested the pleasure of her company at the wedding of their daughter Lilas Caroline to Mr. Colin Kenward at St. Emilia's Church on 2nd August. Tessa held the card in fingers which had suddenly gone limp, staring down at it wide- eyed, almost with horror. "Oh, no!" she murmured. "Oh, no!" "What's the matter ?" Bobs enquired, raising her head from her typewriter for a moment. They were both in her office and she had just passed the envelope to Tessa. "Something nasty ? You look to be struck in a heap." Tessa passed the card over. "I don't want to go," she said. "But I suppose I shall have to." "You assuredly will. And you must get a new outfit." "I - I don't like weddings much," Tessa covered herself. "At least, not the grand kind, and Lilas is sure to have one of those. Still, she hasn't asked me to be a bridesmaid, thank goodness!"

"Don't tell Arabella you dislike weddings," Bobs advised^ "She'd be desolate and most upset. She's planning hers soon, you know. Though naturally it will be just a quiet affair." Tessa nodded. "I hadn't forgotten," she answered. She would have gone to her room, locked the door and cried miserably, but she had promised to go to a concert with Roger. He was her faithful swain now. "Your boy-friend" as everybody dubbed him. Lady Cope-Dawlish approved him and so did Tarquin and even her fellow-students at the art school. "That steady of yours is pure twizz," Nadia had pronounced, having watched Roger meeting Tessa on several occasions. "Yes,, he is," Tessa had agreed. She liked Roger tremendously. He was comfortable and steadfast and he made no bones about the fact that he was in love with her. "Utterly captivated," he admitted. "You're so different. Not just a mass-produced unit like most of the other girls I've met. I love your character, Tessa darling, as well as all the charm of you." He did not press his suit, though, being content to wait, as he told her more than once. "We're seeing each other regularly meantime and you're getting used to the idea of having me there," Roger put it. He took her about London, showing her the historic places he knew so well, and Tessa found them fascinating too under his expert guidance. Tonight Roger looked at her keenly as they stood together in the Festival Hall bar during the interval. "You're very thoughtful tonight," he told her. "Does Mozart affect you like that ?" "I have a little headache," she fibbed. "I expect it's the weather. Somehow I never expected London to be so hot." "It's the stuffiness more than the temperature," Roger said. "No breezes here, unfortunately. But I'll drive you down to the coast on Sunday. My mother wants you to come to lunch at our place. It's only a mile from the sea, actually."

"I haven't met your mother, have I ?" Tessa asked. "No, you haven't. This outing is designed to remedy that. All right if I pick you up about eleven o'clock, then we shan't need to hurry?" The Seagraves lived in Sussex, in a gracious old Georgian house facing a village green, with the rolling Downs not far behind and a glimpse of the Channel through the trees ahead. Mrs. Seagrave was very much like Roger and Tessa felt at home with her at once. They talked about cooking and dogs and Italy, where Mrs. Seagrave had spent a year as a girl. Her married daughter who lived nearby and her husband made up the pleasant party. "Mother may be a widow, but she's resolved not to be over-possessive with her children," Roger said to Tessa later as they sauntered in the garden together. "I'm glad you get on so easily with her, Tessa. You do fit in marvellously well here in every way. And I know Mother shares my opinion of you. I could read that in her eyes." "She's sweet. You've got her features and her colouring, Roger." "I suppose I have. Look here, darling," his voice took on a deeper note, "I know I promised not to rush you, but you have had quite a bit of time to think things over. You and me, I mean. Don't you think you could risk it with me, Tessa ? I do love you very much." His tone was level, but Tessa could sense that with the slightest encouragement he would claim her with passion and firmness. Roger might be patient, but the ardour was there below the surface. He only restrained it because she had wished it that way. If she gave the word the fire which blazed up would be fierce enough, and surely it could warm her heart too. For the first time, Tessa found herself considering the idea seriously. After all, she couldn't waste her life yearning for Colin, who was going to marry Lilas in any case. She stood there on the garden path, the scent of the roses stealing to her, the afternoon sun filtering through the branches of a great chestnut tree in a chequered pattern of green and gold. Thinking, wondering, inclined to take the chance of finding love here. Surely Roger could fill the gap.

"I'm not terribly romantic," he went on, "but I'd always do my best to make you happy, Tessa my love. You'd never be sorry you'd trusted yourself to me." "I appreciate that, Roger," she said gently. "It's' funny, though. You've met so many girls who are far more beautiful and sophisticated than I am, yet you want to marry me. What makes you feel this way about me ?" "I love you," he repeated. "Love doesn't have reasons. It's something that just happens. It happened to me that morning Sir Robert called me into his room and asked me if I'd mind taking his debutante niece out to lunch for him. You were so pretty and individual. I fell for you right at the start." The expression in his eyes as he looked at her touched Tessa inexpressibly. Surely she could learn to love a man like this, adoring and devoted. She wanted desperately to be loved and needed, to feel rich in the sense of belonging again. Since she had torn up the roots of her old Raltian life, she had been wretchedly lonely at heart, for glamorous surroundings did not bring happiness in themselves. Tarquin did not need her now, and soon he would be married again and she would be more alone than ever. With Roger she could find purpose and be rid of emptiness and depression, no longer an outsider but with her own secure place. She gave a long deep sigh and surrendered. "All right, Roger dear. If it's what you really want. I can't say no to you." "You mean it, Tessa ? You do?" His eagerness made her smile at him. Then the next moment she was in his arms. He held her closely, kissing her cheek first and whispering endearments and promises. Then his lips claimed hers. She quivered under the force of his kiss, but only for an instant. She did not want him less than the definite, virile man he was. Everybody was pleased. Mrs. Seagrave cried a little, but quickly explained that it was sheer relief and joy. "Do forgive me, Tessa," she begged, "I know I'm being foolish and old-fashioned, but I just can't help it. I'd begun to think Roger was never going to find a girl to please him sufficiently." Her

son-in-law was already opening a bottle of champagne so they could toast the engagement, Lady Cope-Dawlish and Bobs took the news as a matter of course. "Hardly surprising, dear," Tante Arabella pronounced, "but nice you've made everything official at last. So very suitable in every way, too. You're such a sensible girl. I felt in my bones you'd get engaged before your first season was out, and I was right. Come here and let me kiss you. I shall give you your wedding gown myself." Tessa and Roger went round to Tarquin's studio next day and received what passed for his paternal blessing. He embraced his daughter a trifle abstractedly, shook Roger's hand, then invited them to look at Lord Herison - "A good strong line, don't you think? But still conventional enough to please his fellow-directors. Pity he's too late to go in to the Academy this year." His new mode of life was ideal for Tarquin. He always needed somebody to relieve him of detail, and now he had Lady Cope-Dawlish doing what Tessa had once tried to accomplish for him. He did not have to worry about anything except painting, and all his former vigour seemed to have returned in full. Tessa admired the portrait, glanced at the rough preliminary sketches of the ballerina who was to be the next sitter and went away with Roger feeling more thankful than ever she had him to fill her days now. A formal announcement of the engagement was put in in The Times, and among the letters and telegrams which promptly followed was one from Lady Lawrence. Lilas rang up with her congratulations. "Delighted, my pet," she told Tessa. "You'll make a blissful pair. So complementary to each other. I'll tell Colin about it as soon as he gets back ... No, he's still in Morocco or' the Sahara or somewhere in that direction. Fashion pix and some travel features for next year's holiday ads ... Now you'll bring Roger with you to my wedding, of course?" "Yes, indeed I shall," Tessa replied. She would be able to face that now, keeping a bright smile, with Roger supporting her by his comfortable presence. With him beside her she could surely remain undisturbed as she watched Colin taking his bride at the altar. She went away from the telephone again feeling calm and secure. A vase of pink roses which Roger

had sent her bloomed on her bureau and she touched the velvet petals with affectionate fingers as she passed. When Tessa resumed her school attendance, she was taking off her coat in the cloakroom when she noticed Nadia and two of the other girls considering her. An open copy of a newspaper lay close by, so Tessa was not surprised when her friend remarked: "We've just seen the photograph of you and your intended. I must say you both look extremely smug and prissy, but perhaps you couldn't help it. Lots of luck, Tessa. You'll need it when you're married to him. Marriage is nothing but a trap for women, believe me." "I will," Tessa smiled. "It's not a good picture anyway." "We shan't be seeing you here much longer, I suppose?" Nadia asked. "You won't be finishing your course, I take it?" "Why ever not ?" "Aren't you going to have a conventional house in a conventional location now, then? Or is he dashing enough to plump for a contemporary flat in Kensington or St. John's Wood ?" "We haven't decided much about our future yet," Tessa explained as she combed her hair. "We aren't going to be married until just before Christmas." "But do you seriously mean to go on with pottery?" another girl asked interestedly. "I mean, it's not as if you needed the lolly after all." "I love pottery," Tessa replied. "It's so fascinating. I want to become expert at it and get my certificate from the Guild. I can keep it up after I'm married, even if it only has to be a part-time hobby." They put on their overalls and went to work. Sitting at her wheel, Tessa had to concentrate so steadily she could not think about personal problems, but as she spun and smoothed her clay she was conscious of a background sense of quietness. Now her life was settled for the first time in many years. Indeed she could not remember when she had felt so calm and serene before. She

glanced for a moment at the star sapphire ring which Roger had given her. A symbol of her good sense and wisdom. She had to keep it in her bag while she worked, but at lunch-time she put it back on her finger again. "Show-off," Nadia accused. "You want to make us all green with jealousy." "No, I don't. Really I don't. I just enjoy looking at it myself, that's all." That evening Tessa was chatting with Tante Arabella, drinking a companionable glass of sherry before the older woman changed to go and dine with Tarquin at some important place. "I'm making you a gorgeous flower-bowl," the girl said, "as an extra little wedding gift." "Darling child! What a sweet thought! It is a pity we can't make it a double ceremony, but that wouldn't fit in with my travel arrangements, unfortunately. We must be in New York early in September, you see, so August the twenty-fourth will suit us admirably for our quiet trip to the register office. But I'm organizing a double engagement party for us next week. You and Roger and Tarquin and I - we'll receive the guests' standing together under white flowers. Well no, perhaps coloured ones would be better since I've been married before. And I must get Colin Kenward to take the photographs. After all, if it hadn't been for him I might never have found Tarquin again and you would still be mouldering away on that little island." "Colin is out of the country just now, Tante. Gone to North Africa, Lilas says. Still, he may be back by next week." "I'll have Bobs send him an urgent telegram," Lady Cope-Dawlish declared. "Nobody else with a camera will do." Tessa felt irritated at the thought of having to see Colin again before his own wedding, which would take place in just over a fortnight now. Only tonight there was a glamorous picture of Lilas in the Evening Mercury - "Famous model steps out of the spotlight to marry the man for whom she posed her first fashion study. 'I'm going to be just a housewife now,' she says." Tessa smiled wryly as she tried to imagine her cousin standing beside a cooker in an apron, making Colin his favourite fish soup, the one he'd liked so much in Raltia, with lobster and crab and everything else from the ocean that was rich and succulent. That remark was just another gimmick for Lilas. And

then probably Colin didn't want a home and a simple domestic life anyway. To have Lilas for his wife and squire her proudly around could well be sufficient for him. Blithely Lady Cope-Dawlish proceeded with her party preparations. Once more the house was turned upside down and orders were issued in a never-ending stream. Tessa must have a new dress. "And I'm giving you some pearls as my engagement present, dear. For your wedding it had better be a diamond brooch or clip, I feel, but meantime a good string will be most useful to you. Now don't bother to thank me - I'm so happy at having found Tarquin at last I only want to share my feelings." "But it's so generous of you, Tante. I must..." "Nonsense, dear child. Give me a kiss and then you can be off to Bobs and ask her to make an appointment for me to take you along to Lessemer's. They're the best jewellers in London. I've known darling old Mr. Lessemer for simply years..." Bobs sat in her office drinking iced tea, for the July day was oppressively hot. She fixed the day and time for Tessa, noted it in her diary, then invited the girl to drink a cup. Tessa accepted gratefully. "This heat makes me positively weary," she said. "It's odd, because it was often far hotter than this on Raltia with the sun blazing down all day, yet I never felt so washed out then." "Sea breezes in the Mediterranean. In London it's humid instead, and I expect that's what you find deadening. You'll get accustomed to the climate in time, though." The heat-wave showed no signs of breaking, so next day when Tessa got home from school she went out to sit in the tiny back garden with its paved courtyard bordered by troughs of flowers and two carefully tended small trees. An awning had been put up over the doorway, and Tessa retreated into its shade, with an equally appreciative Snowball, who flopped panting at her feet. They had only been there a few minutes when the coloured manservant came out With his broad smile and offered Tessa a thin air-mail envelope. "Come for you after you left this morning, Mis' Chievers." The letter was

from Raltia, from Caterina, penned in her careful upright handwriting. She wrote to tell Tessa that her parents had now given their consent to her marriage with Pietro Moro and they were officially betrothed. The wedding would be in October, after the last tourist had departed, when the island always relaxed,' and would Tessa come and attend the bride to the altar ? Everybody hoped so as much as Caterina herself. They all sent messages of affectionate remembrance, not forgetting Luciana who was making some wonderful lace for the trousseau and Signor Ganni whose hotel had never been fuller than this summer, and Tomaso who trusted Tessa had found another barber who could cut her hair satisfactorily. Caterina too sent her loving memory-and looked to have a reply to her news as soon as Tessa could conveniently write one. The girl read the sheet through twice, then held it lightly between her fingers while she stared at the geraniums and begonias in the stone boxes with unseeing eyes. She was picturing Raltia as it would look on this July afternoon, the sun shining fiercely so you had to clamp an enormous straw hat upon your head if you went out. The sky would be dazzling, and the sea dark blue shot through with streaks of green and bronze like a peacock's tail as it washed round the rocks. The steep cobbled streets of the town and the beach and the square would be full of strangers from half a dozen countries, men in unfamiliar shirts and white shorts, women in demure cotton frocks or exotic trousered outfits according to their nationality. They would be strolling and sunbathing and swimming and boating in the harbour, eating ice-creams and consuming cold fruit drinks, shopping for sandals and tanning lotions and all those souvenirs which the little shops imported from the Naples factory every year especially for their benefit. Suddenly, so passionately that it surprised herself, Tessa wished she was back. Because she had lived there so long, she felt Raltia was her home and still must tug at her heart-strings. Of course she would go to Caterina's wedding. Presently Tessa went indoors to change. She opened the wardrobe door seeking something cool, and the first thing that caught her eye was the green and white cotton dress Colin had bought her in Fellini's store. Here in London it did not seem so smart as it had done then, but Tessa decided to put it on again now. It was so apt when her thoughts were focused on the island. She smoothed the skirt down round her hips tenderly, looking for her best white shoes and bag and Snowball's lead. She would take him into the park where it would be getting cooler now.

But when they got outside, Tessa found herself instinctively walking along in the direction of Knights- bridge. She could not have explained this desire to gaze at Colin's studio again, unless it was the sheer association of ideas. Snowball ambled along beside her amiably enough, and when they finally turned into the little cul-de-sac, he promptly sat down in the shade of a wall. Tessa stood staring at Colin's home, at the white and blue paint and the gay window-boxes. Somebody evidently watered those in Colin's absence. Probably Bill or the ubiquitous Dorothy. Tessa was so engrossed that she took no notice as a taxi came into the street and stopped to let a man jump down while the driver deposited two large suitcases, until*'Colin's voice was in her ears and his hand laid on her arm. "Why, Tessa! All waiting here to welcome me home. Or were you just passing ?" "Colin! Oh, you're back, then!" "With a fabulous collection of pictures too. Well, how are you, Tessa? How's the Most Unusual Debutante of the Year? I suppose you've enjoyed your first season no end." "It's been all right. Interesting, at least." "I never heard a deb so unthrilled before. Surely you like being out?" He turned to pay the taxi and when his attention came back to her, Tessa said frankly: "No, not much. I had to come out to please Tante Arabella and everybody, but now I think I've gone in again." "You astound me, Tessa. Still, no point standing here to discuss it. You'd better come indoors with me and tell me what's been taking place in my absence." "Nothing much, but..." "Come along now. Too hot out here. Bring the dog as well. He looks as if he could manage a drink himself, and I know I could. The plane was late as usual."

Tessa went inside with him. "You do travel light," she remarked. "Cameras and a couple of drip-dry shirts. That's all I need." "Where's Bill ? Didn't he go with you ?" "I left him behind in Tangier tying up a few loose ends. He'll be back on Sunday night." Putting down his cases, Colin opened the door marked "Strictly Private" and motioned Tessa to precede him upstairs. The long pine-panelled room was cool and fresh, the fireplace banked with ferns. Tessa sank gratefully into a deep chair while Colin went to the cupboard and busied himself with bottles and ice. Snowball was given a saucer of water and then Colin brought over two long cloudy tumblers. "There you are, Tessa. Just like the lemonade we had in Antonio's." "Fancy you remembering that!" "Why not? I enjoyed that stay on Raltia, brief as it was. It was like a page torn out of an enchanted book." "That was April," Tessa remembered. "Only three months and a bit, yet it seems ages and ages ago. Such a lot has happened since then." "Yes, instead of being a toiling peasant girl with a sunburnt nose you're an elegant young lady leading an entirely different kind of life. You've found everything you wanted, in fact." "Have I? I used to dream about London and pretty clothes and dances and things. I wished for them terribly." "Lucky girl to have your dreams come true. Not many people are blessed like that."

"Do you think I've improved since I came, Colin ?" "Yes, you've definitely changed, and for the better as regards your appearance. Since you like me to be frank, I am, you see! You've a far more becoming hairdo and your hands aren't red and rough any longer." Tessa spread them out and stared at them, the nails softly pink and rounded. "Yes, they look so nice I hardly recognize them," she agreed. Her fingers were bare and she remembered that she must have left her ring in her other bag, not having put it on again before she left school. She supposed she must tell Colin about her engagement now. As he hadn't mentioned Roger perhaps he had not seen the newspaper announcement being abroad. Yet still something made her hesitate, postponing the moment to enjoy this intimacy a little longer before she remembered that other people had claims on them both. "They're pretty and expressive. Like everything about you, Tessa. Now tell me why you were so unenthusiastic when I mentioned your season." "Did I sound ungrateful? I didn't mean to. I have had some absolutely lovely things, but it still hasn't been everything I expected. Perhaps I dreamed too much, so reality had to be a let-down anyway." "What's disappointed you exactly ?" he asked her. "It's rather difficult to explain. Mean of me, too, when Tante Arabella has lavished so much on me. But it's not my type of life at all, Colin. I'm bored with being a debutante. This social performance - going to parties just because the people who give them came to yours and doing what they call the Right Things at the Right Time and being seen at places because that's Right too. Whether you enjoy it or not doesn't apparently matter." Colin was regarding her with thoughtful blue eyes over the rim of his glass. "I can understand it, Tessa," he pronounced. "You cotildn't be expected to mould yourself into the conventional form after your years on the island. And you're far too honest and natural to compromise just for appearances' sake."

He took another drink, then he added: 'To think I should find you standing in the street just now. I wondered why. A happy debutante would have been out dining and dancing or being squired for a river trip or whatever's on tonight. Let's see, isn't it Goodwood this week?" "Yes. I don't care for racing, I'm afraid. You never get near the horses and I can't follow the sporting talk. Tante Arabella was rather put out because I wouldn't join her party today, but fortunately I had a pottery lesson instead. I'm taking a course at the Eastbury Art School. It's tremendously interesting." "That's certainly an unusual occupation for a deb, even in these days." "Don't call me that, Colin, please. I'm serious. I love pottery. It grows on you as you progress. And besides, it will be something for me to do when Daddy's gone. He and Tante Arabella get married next month and then leave for New York. Daddy's having an exhibition of his earlier work at the Berriman Galleries there." "I remember reading about the match before I left," Colin said, "or did somebody tell me? - no matter. How do you feel at the prospect of a stepmother ?" "Oh, I get on with her excellently. And she's been in love with him ever since they were young. So it's all most romantic and satisfactory. Daddy's getting back to his old position now and Tante Arabella can help him so much. By the way, she sent you a telegram somewhere abroad, but it was returned marked 'Insufficient address'. Dorothy wouldn't tell exactly where you were, so Tante sent you a letter here instead." "I expect it's with all the rest waiting in the office," Colin replied. "I'll get around to opening them in the morning. What exactly does the lady want? Do you know?" "Pictures again. She - she's giving a party to celebrate her engagement."

"Good news story, so photos will be highly saleable. Yes, I'll be along that night." "May I tell her when I get home ? She'll be pleased." This was the opportunity to tell him her own news, but once more Tessa could not face it. She wanted to capture this special moment, not shatter it by remembering other people, but keep it with her for a little while, suspended out of time. She and Colin alone in this room, sitting together in complete relaxation. It was the last time they would ever be together like this, anyway.. 'Tell me what you did in North Africa," she said to him. "I lived in Morocco once, before we went to Italy. We lodged in a tiny coastal village where everybody kept a donkey and a white cat. I remember the date cakes and the bowls of fresh goat's milk. The man brought the goat to the door twice a day. Is it still so primitive there outside the towns ?" Colin told her, and they went on talking easily. Gradually the shadows lengthened and night fell on the quiet room, but Tessa was not conscious of the passing of time. Colin switched on the lamp at his elbow and then she could see him more closely. He was lounging back comfortably against the cushions of the settee, and now it seemed to Tessa that he was leaner and more taut than he had been on Raltia. Her eyes traced the lines of his profile affectionately. His brown forehead and his cheek and his chin. His mouth that had once possessed hers so warmly. She still quivered exquisitely at the memory of that. Instinctively she smiled as she remembered it now, and Colin put out his hand towards her. She laid hers in it and they sat there in silence, until suddenly Tessa gave a long deep sigh. "What is it, Tessa dear ? And why are you gazing at me so earnestly ? As if you've never seen me before!" "It's been such a long time since we met properly," she answered. "I missed you while you were away." 'Thank you. But I didn't forget you, you know."

"No ? I'm glad of that at least." "You'll always be my little friend from Raltia. Somebody rather special as well as very sweet." "I wish we were back on the island," Tessa said. "Everything was different there. We didn't have to keep thinking about tomorrow then." "And now we must. Well, that's life, Tessa." "You're going to be married soon," she said. "You'll wish me 'good night' presently, and that will be the end. Because I shan't be your little friend after that, you know. Lilas wouldn't want me to be, for one thing. And for another, I don't think 1 could myself." "What do you mean, Tessa ?" His grasp of her fingers slackened, but Tessa curled them round his again so they were still held together. She moved to stand in front of him as he sat on the settee, the lamplight glinting on his hair and throwing strange patterns over his face. Pain stabbed at the girl and her words came rushing out swiftly, unevenly: "You're the most wonderful person in the world to me, Colin. You always have been ever since I saw you walking down the mountainside towards me. How could I ever treat you casually, like any other man in the crowd that's always buzzing around. That's what I should have to do when you're married to Lilas. She'd never stand for anything else. Just think how furious she'd be if she knew we were here like this, for instance. Well then, don't you understand?" Her voice broke. "We shall only be polite strangers in future, Colin. And I love you. That's the trouble. I don't want to let you go." Colin jerked his hand free now, getting to his feet. "Don't say that, Tessa," he commanded, frowning. "It's not true. It can't be." "It is, my darling. I do love you. I can't help myself. Please don't be angry."

"I'm not, but - Oh, you're exaggerating, Tessa dear. Magnifying things out of all proportion. Perhaps it was romantic on the island, but I never made love to you, now did I ?" "No, but that doesn't change it..." "You imagined you had a thing about me, then. That's all. Being young and inexperienced too, it was only natural. But it doesn't signify at all, Tessa. It'll pass off again soon and you'll laugh at yourself as you look back." "I don't think so. I may be young, but I'm old enough to be able to read my own heart. I do love you. I know you're devoted to Lilas and I shan't attempt to alter that because it's what you've chosen. I expect I shall marry somebody else, too, in the future. But I still count you first, Colin. You're my true and only real love. I wanted you to know that before I say goodbye to you." As they stood gazing at each other. Snowball, who had been sitting quietly on the rug, suddenly jumped up and rushed over to the door, barking excitedly and wagging his tail. Tessa started and turned to look at him. "There must be somebody there," she said, but Colin shook his head. "No, we're alone in the house. The only person who has a spare key is Dorothy, and she's spending the week with her sister in Norfolk. I..." He broke off with a sharp exclamation, for the door was opening. Lilas stood there, Snowball jumping up at her skirt unheeded. Her eyes bored into them in turn. Tessa felt shocked for an instant, then definitely frightened by her cousin's expression. But when Lilas spoke her voice was sweet enough. "What a charming little scene!" she said. "Am I breaking something up? All this soft light and nobody else around the place. Surely my adored one isn't trying to seduce you, Tessa?" "No, I'm not," Colin answered brusquely. "How did you get in, anyway?" "With a key." She laid it on the table. "The one Dorothy gave me before she went off. What are you blushing for, Tessa my angel? You look positively guilty, and I'm sure you have no need. Or have you ?"

'That isn't funny," Colin interposed before Tessa could reply. Lilas gave a soft laugh, but it did not hold much amusement. "Screamingly, I should say," she retorted, "to find my little cousin closeted here with my future husband. All alone and nearly midnight! Just like something out of a French film. Were you perhaps discussing the weather, or how Tessa is going to pose for you in her next set of pictures?" The girl had found her voice again now. "Don't get the wrong idea, Lilas," she said clearly. "Colin would never be unfaithful to you." "I'm sure he won't. Between ourselves, I don't intend to give him the chance. I was only making one of my cheap wicked jokes again. Now hadn't you better get off home, Tessa? Colin and I can't greet each other properly when there's a crowd in the room." Without speaking, Tessa lifted her chin and walked steadily out to the staircase, Snowball bounding at her heels. She heard a movement behind her, as though Colin was attempting to follow, but then Lilas's voice came to her ears. "I shouldn't if I were you, Colin. You've got quite enough to explain to me as it is..." Tessa opened the front door and ran down the steps to gain the pavement she could hardly see because she was almost blinded by the tears which were suddenly filling her eyes.

CHAPTER VIII THE following Friday Eastbury Art School broke up for the holidays. The pottery students celebrated with cakes and ice-cream in the chain-store cafeteria, discussing future plans as they balanced at the counter on their high stools. "I suppose you're wafting off to some lush spot, Tessa ?" Nadia enquired. "Scotland or Cannes or Majorca or wherever the rich idlers go ?" "Actually, I'm not," Tessa replied. "I'm not taking any holiday at all until September. Then I have an important date in Italy. Meantime I'm keeping on with my work at the summer school. Mr. Temple says there's no reason why I shouldn't do the course there. It's only a six-weeks' one." "But the school's held in Norfolk," Nadia pointed out, "In a weirdie old manor house right out of the world. There's absolutely naught to do in the evenings except dance to records and wander three miles to the village pub or try to find out if the foreign boys are really interested in making passes at you or just asking about clay values and pigments. Some of them speak English hardly at all." "It could be fun at that," Tessa remarked. "Nice to be right out of town for August at least." "What about your intended?" another girl asked. "He won't like your being away, will he? Or is he going to take up pottery work and come along too ?" "No. Roger is going to Scotland with his mother for a fortnight. That's all the holiday he can have from the City just now, you see. But he'll be driving up to see me at weekends, I expect. Easy enough in a fast car." "Very neat and tidy," Nadia commented. "You do get yourself well organized, Tessa. I'll give you that." Tessa smiled enigmatically as she consumed the last crumbs of her slice of jam sandwich. She thought how deceptive this automatically calm manner she had adopted was. Nobody seemed to guess it was like being frozen, all

your emotions concealed under .a thick layer of ice. This way you didn't think and feel miserable and foolish all the time but could go along quite normally so far as other people judged. She had only seen Colin and Lilas once since that evening at the studio. They had come to the engagement party together, when Lady Cope-Dawlish stood with Tarquin under the chandelier in the hall and Tessa and Roger had to be there beside them. Sir Robert and Lady Lawrence had arrived among the first guests, their two daughters and their future son-in-law behind them. Tessa felt her aunt's chill kiss on her cheek, and then Lilas was giving her one too, the familiar perfume drifting as a cloud. With a tremendous effort, Tessa made herself smile back and say the conventional words. She even managed not to quiver as Colin took her hand in turn and offered his congratulations, though she dared not meet his eyes. She felt they must be looking at her with irony now and possibly even contempt. "Surprise, Tessa, but happy days just the same. Happy years too. You've chosen soundly. I'm sure you'll be happy." "Thank you, Colin. I expect I shall." She stood there erectly in her delicate lemon chiffon dress, fter mother's brooch pinned at her shoulder, determined that nobody, but nobody, should guess her secret. Again she smiled and inclined her head in acknowledgement, then turned to hold out her hand to the next guest, old William Carrington who had just embraced Tarquin with a fellow artist's exuberance and was about to descend upon Tarquin's daughter too. Later on during the evening Tessa did catch a few passing glimpses of Colin, but there was no opportunity of speaking to him alone. Not that Tessa would have taken advantage if there had been. In a few days' time Colin would be married to Lilas and the door finally closed. Tessa saw him using his tiny camera, Lilas always near at hand. She pretended it was nothing at all to do with herself. "Kenward is shooting that thing all over the place," Roger complained once, but Tessa only answered casually : "I suppose he knows what he's doing.

Better than getting people into stiff unnatural attitudes. Let's dance again, shall we ? This is such a gorgeous tune." As they were sitting at the supper table with several friends, the Lawrence wedding inevitably cropped up in the conversation. "What are you giving them ?" Tessa was asked, and she had to confess: "Actually I haven't chosen my present yet. I intend to go and get it on Saturday morning. Saturday's a quiet day in the shops, and if it's delivered on the Monday, it's in good time." "I've not made my selection either," Roger said to her. "China I think it's going to be. Shall we go together on Saturday, then ? I can pick you up around eleven." So Tessa and Roger went to the exclusive Piccadilly store where Lilas had her list in the Bride's Bureau. Tessa read through it, reflecting what exotic tastes her cousin had. She saw that "One silver fruit bowl, preferably engraved" had not yet been crossed off, so she arranged for that. Roger was a more difficult customer. Even when he had considered the list, he went from counter to counter inspecting tea services and ornaments. Tessa thought he seemed a trifle preoccupied this morning too. At last he found a French porcelain morning set which pleased him. Tessa had a swift vision of Lilas and Colin using it in the intimate moments of their early wakening, and went quickly to look at the nearest showcase for distraction. Now- they were able to go to lunch. As they walked along towards St. James's Street, Tessa remarked idly: "You are a particular shopper, Roger. I'd never suspected it before." "I wanted to get exactly the right thing for Lilas," he answered. "Her tastes are definite ones. But I'm sure she'll be pleased with that set. Especially the tray. She loves gilt work." "You know a lot about her," Tessa observed, and to her surprise he coloured a little. "Well, I've known the family for years," he pointed out. "As a matter of fact..." He broke off, and Tessa added for him with sudden intuition: "You

used to be in love with her. Isn't that it? Oh, I'm not at all surprised. She's so utterly fascinating." "It's a long time ago," Roger explained. "When we were both teenagers, actually. Before she got this modelling bug, Lilas was a wonderful girl. But then she was bitten and she changed out of all recognition. Thinned herself and altered her hair and everything. We had a violent row, and that was the end of it. Just as well, probably." He glanced sideways at Tessa as they crossed the road. "You needn't mind, darling," he assured her. "I got over it years ago." "Of course. I understand, Roger. Is this your club? What a massive building!" They proceeded to the Ladies' Annexe, with its buttoned leather armchairs and ornamental mirrors and sedate landscape paintings on the walls. An elderly waiter brought sherry, then conducted them to an alcove table for two with the air of a priest performing a sacred rite. "Is it always so solemn ?" Tessa whispered. "Well, it is a man's club, dear. We don't go in for noisy pranks and such." Tessa felt that that was a superb understatement, but she sat back meekly, waiting in silence while Roger consulted the menu and asked the waiter's advice. She wondered why it had never occurred to her before that Roger must know the Lawrences so well. Now she felt he still harboured a certain resentment against Lilas, because she remembered he had spoken of her hardly more than once. He had called her "publicity-mad" and referred to "posturing clothes-horses" and "wrong notions of womanhood altogether." It was interesting, but it did not affect her own relationship, Tessa decided. Roger was entitled to his own past just as she hugged her secret about Colin to her heart. Somehow it seemed to make things easier. They were both turning over a fresh new page in their emotional life and they would write on it together.

"I expect you're wondering why I brought you here instead of going to a restaurant," Roger said when the order had been given. "I want to talk to you, Tessa. Seriously, without any distractions." "Go ahead, then. I'm listening." "It's about Colin Kenward." "Colin!" Tessa gave a little exclamation of surprise. "Why, what about him?" "I've startled you," Roger observed. "You've been seeing a lot of Kenward lately, haven't you? You even spent an entire evening alone with him at his studio and never mentioned a word to me. I don't like it, Tessa. It's not right when you're going to marry me." He had never used such a tone to her before. Tessa stared at him, her heart beginning to beat uncomfortably. She realized who had told Roger about her visit to Comberry Street. Only one other person knew of it. "I did spend a couple of hours at Colin's place one night - yes. We'd met accidentally and he asked me in for a drink." "And you were all cosy in the lamplight, holding hands and caressing each other. At midnight." "That's exaggeration. We were talking, nothing more. You aren't accusing me of being Colin's lover, I hope ?" "My dear Tessa!" Roger was shocked," and it showed in his expression. "Certainly not. You may be unconventional sometimes, but I know you're not so cheap and casual as that. No, of course not. But -" "But what?" Tessa pressed. "Damn it all, you aren't playing the game, Tessa. You've no business to be closeted up with other men when you're promised to me. Doesn't the fact that we're engaged register anything with you ?"

"Of course it does," she answered. "But this is rather unkind, Roger, and definitely old-fashioned these days, surely. Because I'm going to marry you it doesn't mean I must ignore every other male. Colin's a special friend." "I daresay. I suppose you had an affair with him when you were on that island of yours. All the moonlight and Italian guitars and stuff would guarantee it. Not that I mind," he added. "We hadn't even met then. You're always unusual too. It's part of your charm. But now you are in London and engaged to me you must forget Kenward and behave properly. I don't want my fiancee getting herself talked about in the wrong way." "I haven't done anything I'm ashamed of," Tessa repeated. "Colin and I are friends, nothing more. And we neVer have been, even if you don't choose to believe that. If you feel you can't trust me, perhaps we'd better call it a day and you can have your ring back." "Now don't be idiotic, Tessa darling," he said. "You're taking this the wrong way. I want to marry you. I keep telling you so. It's just that I've been a bit disturbed by these tales. Naturally so. What man wouldn't feel mad?" "Especially when Lilas embroiders her tittle-tattle. I'm positive she did when she retailed it to you." Roger's brow clouded angrily. "Lilas was perfectly in order when she came to see me," he declared. "I'm glad she did. You're doing her an injustice, my dear. What else did you expect, anyway ? Of course the poor girl was upset. There she was, going to welcome Kenward home with only a week or so to their wedding, and finding him alone with you in a dimly-lit room. Looking as if you'd been making love too, she said, but I did feel she was mistaken about that." "She was. We hadn't. Colin isn't in love with me." "I'm relieved to hear it." "And why was it wrong for me to be there at midnight but apparently all right for Lilas to come and join him ?"

"She's practically his wife, isn't she?" Roger said. "For heaven's sake, Tessa, don't pretend to be so dense. I don't want to lose my temper, but really it isn't wise for you to behave so irresponsibly." "Are you jealous of Colin? About me, I mean? Because you need not be." "I'm not pleased," he told her, "but I'm prepared to ignore it now I've made my protest. If you'll promise me not to see him alone in circumstances like that again." "I shan't be doing that in any case. He'll be Lilas's husband in a few days and I don't see how I could be friends with him after that. I don't even begin to get on with Lilas. I never have." "So she told me. It is rather unfortunate, I feel. You know, Lilas has marvellous qualities when you understand her." "I'll take your word for it," Tessa remarked. "Well, there it is, Roger. Shall we forget it and talk about something more pleasant while we eat ?" "Splendid idea, darling. I'm sure you won't do such a foolish thing again in the future, will you ?" "As I've just explained, it's unlikely that I ever shall." She relented as she saw the appeal in his eyes. "Sorry if I was snappy with you, Roger dear. I didn't intend to be hateful." Under the cloth he felt for her hand, squeezing it fondly. "There's my sweet girl," he whispered. "You just hadn't stopped to think. That was all, wasn't it?" "I am casual, I admit. Tante Arabella and Bobs are always complaining about it." "Well, you'll learn soon, darling. So I'll forgive you this time. Have I told you how pretty you look this morning? I like that bit of yellow flower nonsense on your head too."

When the waiter returned with their meal they were smiling at each other. He coughed and served the cold beef and salad with obvious disapproval at such levity in these hallowed surroundings. Tessa felt it best to let the whole episode slide past without any further discussion, but she was still angry and resentful at the way in which Lilas had tried to make mischief. Deliberately and spitefully. "Upset my foot!" Tessa told Snowball, who wagged his tail in agreement. "Why should she be ? She's got Colin where she wants him." Only now it would be even more of an ordeal to go to the wedding on Thursday. Tessa knew the prospect of it frightened her badly, even though she would have Roger for support. How could she watch Colin plighting himself to Liias ? She wondered whether to pretend she was suddenly taken ill on Thursday morning and spend the day in bed. Would Lady Cope- Dawlish and everybody else believe it and accept the excuse for her absence as adequate? She lay awake a long time that night, puzzling about her problem. Miraculously it solved itself. On Monday morning Tessa went along to the Art School to enrol for the Summer School tuition. "You're just in the nick of time," the secretary remarked. "We close the lists at noon today." Sitting down to fill in her form, Tessa read it through for the first time and realized she had made a mistake in her calculations. It required her to report at Windlesborough Manor, Norfolk, on Wednesday afternoon. Wednesday this week, not the next as she had thought. Wednesday August the first. The day before the wedding. Pen in hand, Tessa hesitated. "Oh, dear! I'm afraid I shan't be able to..." She stopped and looked at the form for a few moments. Then firmly she added the rest of the particulars and signed it and handed it back to the secretary. Lady Cope-Dawlish and Bobs exclaimed with horror when Tessa told them what she had done. They were sitting together in the little office-room "We're making a list for my wedding. Only about three weeks now. Incredible, isn't it? But so wonderful. Now it's going to be a very quiet affair, but just the same I feel I must remember my friends for the reception. They won't all be away on holiday even in August - What was that? What did you say, Tessa ?"

She took off her amber-rimmed glasses to stare at the girl incredulously. "Not go to the Lawrence wedding on Thursday! I never heard such impossible nonsense. Of course you'll be there. It would be unthinkable for you not to go. What school? Do you mean this new hobby of yours - making pots and whatever it is you do? But why? ... Surely your cousin's wedding comes before all that. Far far more important. I fail to see why you have to go on Wednesday even if the wretched course does start then. You can go on Friday perfectly well. After you've attended the wedding." Tessa attempted to explain, but Tante Arabella brushed her words aside, and Bobs supported her in declaring that it was essential Tessa appeared at St. Emilia's Church. "Such an insult to Lilas if you don't show up, you know. Have you thought of that? And the way people will gossip!" "I don't like Lilas. She doesn't like me' either. We've never got on together even as children. So it's stupid to pretend we're on affectionate terms now." "But you do like Colin Kenward. You're good friends. What about his reaction ?" Tessa smiled faintly. "Colin will be too occupied on Thursday to know if I'm in the church or not, let alone care. No, I'm sorry, darlings, but there it is. I'm off to Norfolk first thing on Wednesday morning. As it is, I'll be taking a couple of days out of the course later this month to come to your wedding, Tante Arabella." It was impossible to move her. Dinner was a chilly affair, and when Tarquin presently appeared, Lady Cope- Dawlish appealed to him to "make the foolish child see sense". Tessa was secretly amused but not surprised when her father answered cheerily: "Now why should she deck herself out and go and watch the Philistine's daughter getting married if she doesn't want to ? Come to that, I'm not sure I shall attend the brouhaha myself either. I could put in the time far more profitably finishing off Madame Nerova's legs. Painting a leg eloquently is a..." "Tarquin!" Lady Cope-Dawlish wailed. "No, angel! No! I'm relying on you to escort me to the wedding. You know I'm arranging to wear pale green and

my tulle hat to go with that gorgeous peacock waistcoat we chose for you the other day at Hammils." "You want to show me off, eh, Bella my love? In that case, naturally -" He bent to drop a tender kiss on her red-gold curls, and Tessa seized the opportunity to slip quickly out of the room. A little later Roger called and they went off for a leisurely stroll together. It was the magic hour when dusk was melting softly into the warm summer night, with mystery by the river and shadows made for kissing and the rumble of the traffic that let them talk as though they were alone together. Roger put his arm about Tessa's waist, drawing her closer. Then she had to tell him she was going to Norfolk in two days' time. Instantly all the dreamy romantic atmosphere was shattered. He was even angrier than Lady Cope-Dawlish had been. "You can't be so abominably graceless, Tessa. It would be such an affront to Lilas as well as your uncle and aunt. How can you even think about it?" Stiffly Tessa faced him, the light from a street lamp burnishing her hair. "I'm not going to the wedding. I shall leave for Norfolk on Wednesday morning." Finally they walked back in silence. Roger turned away to his car as soon as Tessa reached the front door. He did not say anything beyond a brief "good night". Tessa stood watching him drive away, feeling sick at heart. "But what else can I do?" she said to Snowball, who had come dashing out to welcome her home. "It does seem cheap, I know, but I can't let Roger suspect the truth. Nor anybody else either. I suppose I'm being a coward running away like this, but there it is." She waited for Roger to ring her up the next day as he usually did, but the telephone was silent. During the afternoon she took the bus to Oxford Street and a big multiple stores where she bought some cheap cotton dresses and shirts, a raincoat and a cardigan. Those expensive glamorous outfits hanging in her wardrobe would not be suitable for an informal summer school. That evening Tessa packed her cases. By half past eight on Wednesday morning she was ready to leave.

The coloured manservant carried her bags down into the hall and went to get a taxi. Snowball appeared to sense that something was happening. He whimpered round Tessa's feet and she picked him up and hugged him. "I'm sorry about you," she told him. "But otherwise I can't get out of London fast enough." Bobs came downstairs and saw Tessa standing there with the dog. "He'll miss you," she remarked. "You're determined about this, aren't you, Tessa? Still, I trust we shall see you again the day before Arabella's wedding. Unless you propose to pass that one up too ?" "No, I'll be here for that," Tessa promised. "Don't be unkind to me, Bobs, please. May I go and see Tante Arabella before I leave, do you think?" "She's still in bed," Bobs replied. "She's asked me to say au revoir to you for her, and see you off the premises." "Oh!" Tessa remarked. "You mean she's still mad with me?" "If you will choose to be so tiresome, Tessa. We're both disappointed in you. It's going to be most embarrassing for Arabella tomorrow when people ask why you aren't there. That columnist man from the Morning Dispatch is sure to print some revolting comments too. Here's the taxi. Goodbye, then. Pleasant journey." Tessa let a few tears fall on the way to the station. It was painful to be treated like this, but she could not defend herself or clear up the misunderstanding. Miserably she sat in the train watching the flat East Anglian landscape rolling by, wishing bitterly that Colin Kenward had never come to Raltia and transformed her life with his photographs. True, she had often been restless and worried about money on the island, but that was infinitely preferable to all the confused unhappiness which characterized her days now. Rousing herself presently, Tessa went along to the buffet car for a cup of coffee. Several other young people were already there, obviously destined for Windles- borough Junction like herself. Two French students in slacks and red berets greeted her like an old friend, though they had never met

before. There were some lively Scots and a plump grave-faced blonde, who promptly turned to Tessa as the girl sat down at the counter. "You go to the school? Yes? Do you take ceramics? Ah, gud, gud! I also do. Permit me to introduce myself. I am Ingrid Lindorf from Stockholm. What is your name, please?" When the train arrived, a motley but cheerful little crowd streamed out and got into the waiting buses. Tessa found herself beside a bearded young man she had known slightly at the Eastbury - "I'm vividly expressionist, so you call me Gabriel," he said. As they drove off past the thatched cottages and an old Norman church Tessa heard familiar words from the seats in front. "Ah, scusi!" she exclaimed eagerly, and a flood of mutually delighted Italian was exchanged. They were a party of students from Perugia and Assisi on a year's exchange visit to Britain, enchanted to find an interpreter so early. They helped Tessa with her luggage on arrival, and one of the boys pinched her admiringly as they all went indoors. Windlesborough Manor was a long and rambling place, very ancient and dilapidated, standing in an enormous neglected park. The low-ceilinged rooms looked out on groves of lime-trees and masses of overgrown rhododendrons and tree-lupins and ferns. Owing to its remote situation the whole place had an air of being out of the 'ordinary world which Tessa found highly acceptable in her present mood. She was given a tiny match-boarded cubicle in one of the girls' dormitories and a seat at a bare dining table to which students carried their own food from the serving-hatch. They were expected to make their beds and do a few other domestic chores as well. Lessons started in earnest next morning. As Tessa sat out on the grass in the sunshine, listening to an exposition of the classic ceramic forms of Greece and Rome, her thoughts kept wandering far away from the tutor's voice. Lilas would be putting on her bridal gown now. Tessa tried to remember what it was like, but could only recall reading a newspaper note about "a dramatic skirt" and somebody lending a diamond and pearl tiara. The house at Weybridge would be shivering excitedly with activity and laughter and chatter as the hour of the wedding drew nearer. A question from the tutor brought Tessa's attention back for a few moments, but it soon began to stray again. Even as the students all went indoors for lunch, she was wondering if

Lilas had eaten a meal at noon today or if she had merely sustained herself with something light and a little glass of brandy. Not that you could imagine the cool poised Lilas being nervous as a rule. After lunch the students washed up according to rota, and Tessa was down for duty today, with Ingrid and two of the Italian girls. Dreamily Tessa wiped knives and forks and spoons and endeavoured to picture Colin in his wedding clothes. He would look so strange in the conventional striped trousers and morning coat, a white flower in his buttonhole, his grey topper in his hand, such an outfit would certainly look well on Roger with his broader body and staider manner, but it did not seem to fit Colin's personality at all. Tessa remembered him on the island, in an open-necked blue shirt and sandals, casual and easy and utterly attractive. "That is all," Ingrid pronounced. "Now we can go to see the kilns ready for practical work. What do you stare at, Tessa, please ? Something we have not done ?" "Oh, sorry," Tessa apologized, recovering herself. "I was wandering, I'm afraid. It will be nice to get our hands into clay and put some of Mr. Deakin's ideas to the test. I'm not altogether convinced about that terracotta theory myself. Are you ?" Guests would be filling St. Emilia's now, and she should have been among them, wearing that new apricot silk coat and a flowery hat, sharing a pew with Lady Cope-Dawlish and Tarquin and Roger. Instead here she was in a pair of jeans and an overall belted tightly round her slim waist, avoiding the ceremony she had not the courage to watch. She made herself think determinedly about pottery again, but ten minutes later, as she stood beside a kiln watching the finger of the heat register creeping up, she was picturing Lilas entering the church on her father's arm, a symphony in white and gold with a cloud of chiffon floating round her. She would walk slowly, gracefully to the flower- decked altar rails, and Colin would be waiting for her there. Tessa gave a little moan and Ingrid looked across at her in surprise. There was music and dancing that night. One of the Italians played his mandolin and tried to persuade Tessa to sing with him, but she excused

herself, saying she was too tired. In her mind's eye she was thinking about Mr. and Mrs. Colin Kenward, getting out of their airliner in Majorca, driving to their hotel where they would have a room overlooking the sea, alone at last to kiss and caress each other. The only reason Tessa did not cry herself to sleep was the thinness of the partition between her bed and the next one. Tessa did not want any breakfast the morning, but she went to the dining-room to save comment and put a cup of black coffee and an apple on a tray which she carried to her seat. Gabriel was her neighbour on one side, already tucking into egg and bacon and reading the newspaper. He gave her an abstracted: "Hi, child!" and continued his occupation. Then presently he folded up the paper and offered it to her. "Want the Dispatch? Nothing much in it, as usual, but it helps the old orientation to keep abreast." Tessa shuddered. "No, thanks," she declined hastily. There would be pictures of a radiant Lilas and a smiling Colin, and Johnny would have contributed some wittily barbed remarks, maybe even commenting on her own absence. Gabriel had not seen her name there, apparently, but then he was hardly likely to read about a wedding, especially of people whom he did not know. Seemingly none of the other students read the Dispatch or else were equally uninterested in social gossip columns. Nobody passed any observations to Tessa and she went to start the day's studies as usual. It was better to work off this self-pitying depression rather than give yourself time to be smothered in it. When Tessa had been in Norfolk for a week, she wrote an affectionate little note to Lady Cope-Dawlish and sent picture postcards to her father and Bobs. Since she had heard nothing from Roger, she penned a letter to him as well. The tone was affectionate, for she was fond of him even though she did not love him with the same instinctive passion that Colin inspired in her heart. Roger was kind and solid and reliable, and with him she would "belong" at last. She did not want him to think she failed to appreciate his worth. Besides, now that Colin had gone from her for ever, she would keep all her thoughts focused upon Roger instead, and surely love for him must come in time, even though it might not be the same kind of love she had

known before. Marriage was a serious thing and she would serve it seriously too. Days slipped by like beads on a sticky string. Tessa worked industriously and did her share of chores, and joined in with the others when they had a sing-song evening or piled into somebody's rattletrap car to drive to the village pub or as far as Great Yarmouth for a session in the fun fair or the pier café, or just a stroll along the front. Nobody had much money, but then nobody seemed to mind anyway. Tessa found herself growing tanned again, looking much as she had done on Raltia, because she could not go twice a week to Alphonse's salon now either. Yet she was still conscious of a feeling of quiet satisfaction, that was her kind of life, not the glamorous but empty one Lady Cope- Dawlish had shown her. The joy of creation, of contemplating a lovely piece and knowing your hands had fashioned it, was the keenest pleasure. If only she could know the even greater joy of love reciprocated as well. She began to wonder why she did not hear from Roger. She knew he was taking his mother to Scotland two days after the Lawrence wedding, spending a fortnight there with relations, which was an unbreakable Seagrave family tradition, it appeared. He could surely have telephoned, though. Perhaps he was punishing her, and would even treat her distantly when they met again on the eve of Tante Arabella's wedding. Tessa had arranged to take two days off from her studies next week in order to be there, and she was beginning to feel she would have to be particularly repentant and sweet to Roger if their engagement was to continue. As naturally it would. She did not wear her ring at school, but it was reposing safely in her suitcase, locked up all the time. Nobody in fact seemed to write to Tessa, or telephone her either. She wondered whether to ring up Bobs and ask how everything was getting on, but some quirk of pride made her decide against it. Bobs, who had been so friendly and helpful at first, was just as displeased with her as Tante Arabella. Tarquin would be on her side, but it was useless disturbing him while he was so engrossed with his ballerina's portrait. He would at best only agree abstractedly to everything Tessa said, tell her to do whatever she pleased and return immediately to his canvas. She sighed and tried to possess herself in patience just a few days longer.

On the Sunday before she was due to return to London for her father's wedding, Tessa spent a lazy afternoon in an old boat on the reed-fringed lake near the Manor. Gabriel and Ingrid were with her, both experienced with the oars, while two of the Italian boys encouraged them all from the bank. They were having a picnic on the grass afterwards, watching Gabriel toss raspberries into the air and catch them with his mouth, laughing and chattering a good deal. Then an elderly maid on the Manor staff came heavily towards them. "Is Miss Chievers with you ? There's a gennelman come for you, dearies. He's waiting on the terrace." Tessa jumped up and sped towards the house. It would be Roger at last. Probably he had now returned to town and taken this opportunity to drive up and see her again. She wished she was looking less casual, wearing a dress instead of shorts, with her hair smooth and elegant shoes on her bare feet; but there was no time to change. Roger was already sitting on the terrace in one of the old deck-chairs there. Only it wasn't Roger after all. It was Johnny of the Morning Dispatch. He rose to greet her with his familiar, slightly derisive grin. 'You!" Tessa exclaimed, disappointed. "Even me," he replied. "Can it be that I detect a note that isn't sheer delight in your welcome, Tessa ?" "I'm surprised. I didn't expect to see you. How did you get here anyway ?" "By road. In my car with the assistance of the usual route-maps. Nice to see you again, my pretty one. You're a regular little gipsy. Brown as they come. Suits you, though. I approve it." He kissed her lightly on the cheek. "Where can we have a quiet natter together?" he enquired. "What do you want to natter about ?" "You, of course. The Dispatch's Number One Deb. Or have you forgotten? What is our little sweetheart doing buried in wildest Norfolk making pots instead of yachting in the Mediterranean or sunning herself on the Cote d'Azur with the millionaires queueing up to hold her beach-towel for her ?"

"Don't be idiotic, Johnny. I like doing ceramics. And this is a perfectly good summer school." "Indubitably. And quite in keeping for the Most Unusual Deb of the Year to do something off-beat once more. You're always in the news, my ducky, aren't you? And the joke is you only got there accidentally without thinking. Whereas the girls who scheme and plan never make the grade at all. Like the languorous Lilas, for instance. She's in Istanbul, I understand." "Istanbul! I thought they were spending their honeymoon in Majorca." "What honeymoon? No wedding, no honeymoon, Tessa. That's how it goes." "But Lilas is married to Colin now! Is this your peculiar way of ribbing me because I wasn't there, Johnny ? But you see, I had to ..." She broke off as Johnny started to roar with laughter. "You don't know!" he chortled delightedly. "You absolutely do not know. With any other girl it would be impossible, but not for our Tessa. She's always true to form." "Stop it, Johnny!" Firmly she seized his lapels and made him face her directly. "Now what are you saying? What is it I don't know ? Tell me at once." 'That the Lawrence wedding was washed up, sweetheart. Cancelled at the last minute." "Cancelled!" Tessa echoed. "It couldn't have been!" "Was and all, I tell you no lie. Telegrams and phone calls to the guests and terrific schemozzle. Papa gave out that the bride had changed her mind.Decided Colin Kenward wasn't the right man for her alter all, so taken this courageous step. Made glorious headlines in the Dispatch next morning too. I got an exclusive story from Rowena Hislip. Her little sister was going to be

one of the bridesmaids. Sharp cookie, Rowena. I met her at your coming-out party, by the way." "But I can't understand it," Tessa gasped. "How could Lilas change her mind? She loved Colin. She wanted him. She was determined to marry him. I know she was. Whatever can have happened ?" Johnny spread his hands. "Not being clairvoyant, I can't tell you, honeybun. Mind you, they do whisper that it was Colin himself who did the ditching. Managed to wriggle out of the noose before it was pulled tight. But being a gent he let Lilas take all the credit to save her face." He studied Tessa's expression, then laughed happily again. "And this is the first you've heard of it," he declared gleefully. "The bride's cousin didn't even know the wedding was off. So busy making her pots she forgot to turn up at the church anyway. And although she was chosen the Dispatch's favourite deb she doesn't bother to read the paper." "No, I didn't. Not that morning. Sometimes I read it, of course." "Don't apologize, Tessa, my adored one. You've given me a beat of a story. I felt in my bones there was news wherever you were, and how right I was! This little hunch is certainly paying off. Just wait here a few minutes while I whistle up my photographer. We'll need some snazzy pix of you making your pots and whatnot." "Johnny! Where is Colin now ? What's he doing ?" "Search me, darling. He's closed his studio and walked off into the blue. Nobody seems to know where he's gone or if he intends to come back."

CHAPTER IX HAVING been so unexpectedly jolted out of her rustic peace, Tessa went back to London to attend her father's wedding still disturbed and with mixed emotions. There was certainly relief that Lilas had not captured Colin after all, though Tessa was extremely puzzled as to what the real reasons could be. Obviously there must be a great deal hidden below the surface of which Johnny and the rest of them did not know. A marriage contract in such circumstances was not broken easily or lightly, and there was the business aspect too, since Sir Robert had planned to become a sleeping partner in Colin's studio activities. Not that it made any difference to her own position, except that now she might possibly be forgiven by Tante Arabella for her defection in coming away to Norfolk instead of "doing your proper duty to your family" as she had been told. Tessa was glad that in spite of everything she had taken the summer school course. Apart from the practical value of the daily instruction, it had provided a breathing space in which she could adjust herself again. Carrying out a routine without distractions, right away from everything else, had already soothed her over-strained nerves just as the keen salt breezes from the North Sea and the open-air life had helped her physically. Now she was no longer weary and depressed but able at least to face her problems as they arose. The cheerful undemanding company of her fellow- students was good for her as well. The Scots taught her to dance the Highland reel and several assorted nationalities took on her instruction in the bowling alley behind the ancient inn at the crossroads. Gabriel consulted her as to the best way he could Find Himself. "I think representation might be the true answer for me," and he described it to her at length. With the Italians Tessa was completely at ease, regarded by them almost as another member of the family. "You grow darker from the sun, so you look much like them too," as Ingrid remarked. Michele, the elder boy, made no secret of his admiration for Tessa. He tried to embrace and kiss her whenever he got the chance. He reminded Tessa of Domenico, and she knew exactly how to treat him, so he bore no resentment. Gaily snubbed, as if the

whole thing was a game and the greatest fun, Michele only laughed. He simply made another attempt at the earliest opportunity. "One day maybe you change your mind," he told Tessa as they sat on the lawn, "or maybe not. I take the risk. Sometimes you look as though you are distant, bellissima. Thinking of another man than me. It is so, yes?" Tessa smiled vaguely. She had spread out her bare arms to catch the cool evening breezes, enjoying the touch of them on her skin. "I think of many things," she answered. "You have a lover who waits for you in London?" Michele pursued. "Perhaps I have." She thought of Roger. She still had not heard from him in any way and she wondered how they were going to meet again now. "And perhaps not," she added. "I shall only be away a couple of nights, you know." "Signor Deakin will be pleased you return so quickly. You are the star of his class. He thinks you have much talent. And also the sense for colour." "I get that from my father. He's world-famous for his."There was a thunderstorm over East Anglia as Tessa travelled down next morning. When it rolled away the countryside was fresh and clear, damply sweet scents drifting in as Tessa opened the carriage window again. Somehow it was symbolic of the way in which she was going home, under clouds that might break so heavily soon. At Liverpool Street Station she splashed through the rain to find a taxi and drive to Kensington. Barely was she in the house than Snowball came flying down the stairs, barking deliriously, to hurl himself upon her. "So you haven't quite forgotten me, then," Tessa laughed as she hugged him. Lady Cope-Dawlish was in the drawing-room, equally glad to see Tessa, it seemed, though not so demonstrative. She gave the girl an abstracted kiss, waving her bejewelled hand at the parcels and letters and telegrams on the table. "So many sweet people have congratulated me. I feel positively young and girlish again. Do you think I look well, Tessa dear? I've been resting as much as possible and doing Madame Elise's exercises twice a day so that I

shall be absolutely on top tomorrow. You must see my ensemble. The coat is simply divine ..." "Do I take it I'm back in favour ?" Tessa asked Bobs a little later. "Is the bride going to let me have another chance ?" Bobs grinned sardonically. "We could both have saved our breath," she observed. "We needed it when we heard the Lawrence girl had changed her mind too, barely twenty-four hours before the ceremony. So inconsiderate arid stupid! If she had wanted to throw him over, she must have known earlier than that. But of course the last-minute cancellation got lots more publicity. I wouldn't be surprised myself if the whole affair was deliberately engineered." "What, just for Lilas to get herself into the papers?" Tessa said. "For a gimmick? But I can't see Colin lending himself to a scheme like that, and Uncle Robert was going to help him extend the studio too." "What is genuine and what's imitation nowadays?" Bobs wondered. "You never can tell. She certainly doesn't seem to be pining for him. Doing this modelling in Turkey and then going on for a cruise round the Greek islands in some wealthy man's yacht." Tessa said thoughtfully: "But she was in love with Colin. She did want to marry him. I'm positive of that." "You don't convince me, Tessa. It isn't the way a girl in love behaves. Now Colin has shut up the place and gone off, and nobody knows where he is. I've tried every means to find out too. We wanted him to take the wedding photographs tomorrow. So appropriate when it was that article of his and his pictures that brought dear Arabella and your father together again after all those years." "Hasn't anybody any idea? Colin can't have disappeared from the face of the earth all at once." "His secretary says he bought air tickets for the Far East, paid her six months' salary in lieu of notice and placed the house in the hands of estate

agents for a quick sale. His bank is the only place that has his address, and naturally they won't reveal it." "It looks as though he's abandoned London, then," Tessa remarked. "Oh, dear! What a ghastly mess and muddle it is." "I agree," Bobs said. "Let's talk about something more pleasant. How is Roger? I suppose he comes up to Norfolk to see you as often as he can ?" "I shall be ringing him soon," Tessa replied. "I'm waiting till he gets back to his flat because I know he detests being called at his office on private business." "Quite right too. But then Roger is essentially wise. Very refreshing nowadays. You're really a lucky girl. We shall have to start thinking about your bridal plans soon, of course. In the meantime, what are you proposing to wear tomorrow? That apricot silk will be perfect.,." Presently Tessa did phone Roger, but it was the housekeeper in charge of the service block .who answered. "No, I'm afraid Mr. Seagrave isn't in yet. I don't expect him till late... You'll ring again ? Thank you." Tessa sighed as she replaced the instrument. Plainly things were definitely wrong, otherwise Roger would have been in touch with her. He knew she would be back in London today. She looked down at Snowball, who was still refusing to leave her side. He barked eagerly and rushed off to bring his lead. "Same old walk," Tessa warned him as they set off. "I expect it will be the last time we'll go this way too." Knightsbridge was noisy and crowded, the pavements still gleaming from the recent storms. Tessa put Snowball under her arm and went on to Comberry Street where the little blue and white house stood deserted with all the curtains drawn. Even Colin's name-plate had been taken away and the steps looked as though they had not been washed for days, and instead of flowers in the window-boxes a house agent's board had been fixed up. Tessa thought of the night in the gracious upstairs room where Lilas had disturbed

them, and of the studio itself where Colin had made those wonderful pictures of her and given her that ecstatic never-to-be- forgotten kiss. It was difficult to restrain the tears as memories flooded back. Sombrely Tessa had to turn away at last. She got a taxi back to Kensington, to find a letter that had just been delivered by special messenger waiting for her on the hall table. Hastily she tore it open to find it said baldly:

DEAR TESSA, I shall call for you about ten-thirty in the morning to escort you to the wedding as promised. Afterwards I should like to talk to you privately. There are some important matters we must discuss. I trust you are well. ROGER

Tessa stared at it in astonishment. This, this had been written to her by the man to whom she was engaged to be married! The man whose ring she wore, who had said he loved and wanted her! Even though Roger was not the hotly demonstrative type, this note was utterly out of character. Whatever could these "important matters" be now ? Tessa supposed she could only wait with as much patience as she could muster until the moment came for them to talk to each other. Though surely Roger could have come to see her tonight. She was about to ring him up and ask him to do so. Then she read the letter again, and pride made her change her mind. The letter was accompanied by a small florist's box. Tessa opened this to see an exquisite spray of pale yellow orchids nestling in the cottonwool. Bobs, passing by, nodded admiringly. "Gorgeous. Your corsage from Roger, I suppose ? You'd better have it put in the fridge overnight so it will be perfectly fresh for you to wear tomorrow."

Tarquin came to dinner and with Bobs they sat round the table eating and drinking a little but talking much more. Tante Arabella was gay and sparkling in a way Tessa had never seen before, lively as the lady always was. She laughed and chattered away to Tarquin, who listened benignly and appeared to relish it all hugely. Of course he would not always be so amiable, Tessa reflected. There would be moody spells and times when he was oblivious of everything except the work in hand, but she felt confident his wife would be able to cope with him. Better than his daughter ever had, probably.It was going to be a good marriage, and Tessa's heart was glad for them both. She ran up to her room and came back carrying a large box which she laid in front of Lady Cope-Dawlish. "My present to you both," she said. "May you have many contented years together ... I copied the shape from an ancient Greek temple bowl. Even with my teacher's supervision I had to make four bowls before I achieved the line and the colouring I wanted. It had and Roger will be the next couple, of course." Lady Cope-Dawlish exclaimed delightedly at the pure grey pottery with the faint-toned flower decorations. Tarquin took up the bowl and examined it closely with the artist's critical eye. "It's good, Tessa," he pronounced in some surprise. "Well finished too. I didn't realize you were taking ceramics as seriously as this. I thought you'd just got yourself a hobby to pass the time along." "No, much more than that, Daddy. It's grown on me irresistibly since I took it up. I shall go on to the really advanced stuff as soon as I'm ready. Learn about glazes and making figurines and things like that." "We must find a studio for you," Tarquin declared, "as soon as we get back from the States. Do remind me, dear heart," he added to his fiancee. "Of course, Tarquin. Unless Tessa is making future plans for herself? Don't forget she's going to be married at the end of the year." "What difference does that make?" Tarquin asked impatiently. "With talent like this, she'll go on with ceramics. Naturally she will."

"What are you going to do next, Tessa?" Bobs wanted to know. "This house is being closed for a couple of months. I'll be looking in from time to time, but that's all. I'm going to stay with my sister who has a flat in Church Street. I'll give you the address in case you need anything, dear." "Thanks, I'd like to have it," Tessa said. "I shall stay at Windlesborough Manor until mid-September now, and finish my present course. Then I'm flying back to Raltia for a little holiday. Caterina is getting married, Daddy, so I shall attend her wedding. Everybody seems to be marrying nowadays!" "Should you go back to that island?" Lady Cope- Dawlish wondered. "Is it wise, do you think? You've cut the chains which bound you there and started a new life instead. Besides, what about Roger? Does he want you to go off again like that ?" "I'll know when I've spoken to him about it tomorrow, Tante Arabella. I haven't had a chance to discuss it with him yet. But I don't suppose he'll mind much." "You young things! You're all so casual nowadays. Thank goodness my generation are not like that!" Next morning Tessa dressed for the wedding in good time. It seemed strange to be wearing lovely formal clothes once more after the way she went about in Norfolk. The apricot chiffon dress with its matching silk coat set off her new tan and she fastened Roger's spray of orchids on her shoulder as the finishing touch. She still did not know what they were going to say to each other when they met, despite her bright manner at the dinner-table the previous evening. Roger arrived promptly. Tessa was already standing in the hall with several of the other guests, including Mrs. Conningham, who was the bride's sister and had taken Tessa about in London. He saw the girl before she saw him, slender and glowing in her warmly-toned clothes against the dark panelling on the walls. A curious expression crept into his eyes, and Tessa noticed it instantly when she turned at the sound of his voice. "Good morning, Tessa."

"Oh, hello, Roger darling! Here you are at last." She offered her cheek for his kiss while the others smiled. She thought his lips were coolly perfunctory, nevertheless, she whispered, "It's good to see you again. How are you ?" "Fine," he replied. "You look extremely well yourself." "Yes. It's the Norfolk air and the country life, I suppose. And I've got nearly as tanned as I used to be on Raltia." "It's quite becoming," he assured her. "Ah, good morning, Mrs. Conningham. Good morning, Jean. Good morning, Lynn. Hope you enjoyed that sailing holiday? Are we all going to the register office, then ?" "Only six of us," Mrs. Conningham explained. "Quite sufficient for witnesses. The actual marriage is being considered simply as a private family matter. Everybody else will be at the reception at the Hotel Magnifico. Well now, it's quarter to eleven, so I think we'd better get started. We want to arrive at the office before Arabella gets there with Sir George - he's our cousin on the other side of the family who's giving her away, you know, Mr. Seagrave. I think you and Tessa had better come in my car and Lynn and Jean can go in their own." So Tessa sat with Roger in the registrar's big room, watching the radiant Arabella become her stepmother. As bride and groom were signing, Tessa shot a quick sidelong glance at her fiance. Catching her eye, he gave her a faint answering smile, and impulsively Tessa slipped her hand into his for a moment. Roger was so solidly comfortable. She was glad of his support in this nostalgic moment as mixed emotions swept her. Now somebody else was responsible for Tarquin's wellbeing, she could not help feeling a little desolate and alone, but Roger would counteract all that. When they came to that talk later on she would be very sweet and understanding and show him how much she appreciated his worth. Perhaps she had been unresponsive to him really, her mind so full with those dreams about Colin and all her foolish yearnings for him. But that was over now. Colin had gone away, and just as effectively for her as though he had indeed been married to Lilas. Colin was the past, but Roger would be her future. She would behave quite differently

to him henceforth. She squeezed his hand before she let it go as the ceremony ended and everybody rose to exchange kisses and embraces with Mr. and Mrs. Tarquin Chievers. At the Hotel Magnifico the flower-decked reception salon was filled to capacity, the atmosphere thick with laughter and chatter as the champagne circulated. "Arabella! Exquisite gown, my dear" - "We're so happy for you both, darlings" - "How fortunate it's such a gloriously fine day!" - "Ah, Tessa! So pretty as usual. You and Roger will be the next couple, of course." Inevitably the Morning Dispatch was among the guests. Johnny came up to Tessa with his customary half-mocking smile and gave her shoulder an affectionate hug. "Hi, beautiful one," he said, nodding casually to Roger. "Don't draw your brows together like that, old son. Purely platonic, you know. When are you going to wed this type, honeybun ?" "We haven't decided on the actual date yet, Johnny. Just before Christmas, probably. I'll let you know." "Waiting till Tarquin and his lady love get back home, eh? Quite right and proper. But you've disappointed me about this, Tessa." "I have ? How ? What do you mean ?" "Now what kind of confounded nonsense have you got into your brain?" Roger demanded. "If you can call it a brain, that is." "It functions," Johnny retorted, "as certain indiscreet individuals have discovered to their cost." He gave all his attention to the girl. "You're not running trueto form about this, sweetness," he chided. "Our Tessa, the Most Unusual Debutante of the Year, doing the conventional thing that's expected of every deb." "I do hate that title," Tessa complained. "Go on, then. What have I done anyway?" "Getting married at the end of your first season, and to a rising City financier. Or is it a banker ? I never can tell the difference. We'll say

marrying money and let it go at that. So in-the-ruttish and sensible. Not our lively little Tessa at all." Roger's face was thunderous. "I'd like to give you a bashing some time," he said angrily. "Do you never think of anything but scratching around for nasty tittle-tattle to put in that scandal sheet of yours ?" "Now what's nasty or scandalous about your engagement?" Johnny enquired blandly. "Surely it's all neat and correct. At least, I trust it's in order. Of course if it isn't, that will make a much better story and I'll be able to give you thicker type ..." Laughing,, Tessa stepped between the two men. "Now don't be tiresome, Johnny," she admonished him. "You never can resist a chance to needle, can you?" She slid her arm through Roger's black-coated sleeve. "You go and write that Tessa Chievers is very happy about her father's marriage today and she's looking forward to her own now. Does that satisfy you ?" "I suppose it'll have to," Johnny grinned. "Okay, my gorgeous pet, you win. Not that Stuffed-Shirt here deserved a prize like you. See you later." He winked at her and disappeared into the throng. "So-and-so!" Roger muttered. "However he gets himself admitted anywhere completely beats me." "People like to read about themselves in the papers," Tessa pointed out. "Johnny isn't too bad really. Just deliberately irritating at times. He says he gets more response that way. He certainly got some from you too. Are you feeling out of sorts, darling? You do look so thundery." Her tone was light and she was surprised to see how Roger flushed. "Well, actually I do have a few things on my mind today, Tessa," he said. "I'm sorry. Business worries ?"

"No. Personal problems." A passing waiter offered a tray of canapes, but Roger waved him impatiently away. "Look, Tessa, I must have a talk with you soon. Could we decently slip out for a bit ?" "Not this minute. Not until Daddy and Arabella leave. It would be far too noticeable." "I suppose you're right. I don't want to appear crude. I'll go over and make polite noises to the Davenports for a bit, and as soon as the Chievers leave, I'll come back here and get you. All right ? Thank you, Tessa." It was just after half past twelve when Arabella and Tarquin finally departed in a whirl of kisses and embraces. "Keep up with your ceramics," Tessa's father commanded. "I was impressed by that piece of yours, child. I'll want to see some more of your work when I get back." Her new stepmother enveloped Tessa in a cloud of scent and rustling silk. "Goodbye for the present, dearest girl. Don't forget to write to us. You have the New York address. Oh, and don't choose your wedding gown until I'm home again and can advise you.... Goodbye ... Goodbye, everybody." Now Roger was at Tessa's side again. "Let's go into the Park," he suggested. "It's reasonably quiet there." "Very well, dear. But I can't stay long. I'm supposed to be joining Mrs. Conningham's party for lunch in the hotel grill-room at half past one." They made their way through the Park Lane traffic and across between the trees to the wider stretches of grass. Two deck-chairs leaned together and Roger opened them out and invited Tessa to sit down. He stood watching her arranging her filmy skirts, then took the other chair and began without preamble: "Why do you think I need to talk to you, Tessa ?" "I don't know," she answered. "And all at once I'm afraid to ask."

"I'm sorry," Roger continued. "Believe me, I am. Deeply sorry and disturbed. The last thing in the world I want to do is hurt you, Tessa." "Are you likely to, then ?" she enquired. "I'm not sure. Yes, probably I am. That's the devil of it. But I've got to be fair to you and to myself as well. I suppose you've been wondering why I never came to this Windlesborough place to see you ? Or even rung you up there ?" "Well, naturally, I was puzzled, often. You didn't answer my letter either. Didn't you get it ?" "Oh, yes. It arrived while Mother and I were staying with Aunt Katrin at Loch Erskine. I didn't reply because I didn't feel I could. That is, I couldn't write you the kind of letter you'd expect." "I don't understand, Roger. What exactly are you trying to tell me?" "That I'm beset with doubts," he answered. "I'm not sure about it any longer. About us. About our engagement." "But, Roger!" Tessa stared at him aghast. "You love me. You said you did. Perhaps I haven't been clever about all this, but I'm not very experienced with men. Are you still angry because I cried off Lilas's wedding that day ? I am sorry about it, Roger. It was cheap and stupid, I admit, and I ought to have showed more sense. But that doesn't count now in the circumstances, does it ? Please don't go on holding it against me." "I'm not, Tessa," he said. "I do appreciate that you're quite young and you haven't even been brought up in proper English ways. It's simply that I feel apprehensive about going on with our marriage because I'm not sure it could be a success." "Why not? If we love and trust each other. And work at it ... I do want to marry you, Roger. But - but is it your love for me that's changed, then?" She waited a moment, but he did not reply, and she added: "Have you met someone else while I've been away in Norfolk?"

"Nothing like that, Tessa." He was sitting forward in his chair, hands clasped in front of him. Tessa had never seen him look so unhappy yet still firmly determined. 'The fact is - you'd better know the truth - I was very lonely when I met you last spring. You appealed to me enormously. You're so pretty and natural and graceful. Everything I'd been seeking in a girl, in fact. I fell for you heavily. It seemed to me you'd make me the perfect wife. Mind, I still do think you're adorable, Tessa, and I've grown exceedingly fond of you. That hasn't changed a bit." "But you don't love me enough. Is that it ?" "I can't help wondering if we're really suited, you see, Tessa dear. After all, one must be sure for marriage if it's going to mean anything worth while. To begin with, our tastes are so different. You go in for all this artistic stuff. Not surprising for Tarquin Chievers' daughter. But it's not my line of country at all. Suppose it's a mistake for us to go on together? You might be far happier with somebody else who likes everything you do." "I don't see the point yet," Tessa replied. "It's a highly weak argument to me, but still -" She peeled the pale glove on her left hand and pulled off her ring. "You'd better have this back, Roger," she said. "I'll release you from everything. That's what you really want, isn't it? You want to be free again. Am I right ?" Roger glanced at the ring she held out, but he did not take it. "Yes and no," he answered. "I want time to sort myself out, as it were. That's all. I never do anything in a hurry without weighing up all the pros and cons first, so I can't do this either. It's the way I'm made, I suppose." "Love doesn't need thinking over, Roger. You either love and want somebody or you don't." "I can't agree, Tessa. One must be sure." "I was sure. But since you're not, how could I possibly go on being engaged to you ?" Roger still did not take the ring from her.

"Look, dear," he suggested, "couldn't we let things stand as they are for the present? Regard our engagement as temporarily suspended, not broken off." "Why do you ask that ?" Tessa wondered. "Well, I'm going abroad tomorrow for three weeks' holiday. When I get back we can talk things over again in some better place. Then we'll be able to decide what's best for both of us." "And meantime am I supposed to stay engaged to you without knowing whether you will eventually feel like marrying me or not? No, thank you, Roger. I have some pride, you know. If you can't decide how you feel about me here and now, then you don't love me. Here, take the thing!" Despite his protests, she thrust the ring into his jacket pocket. "You look enchanting with your eyes sparkling like that," he remarked unexpectedly, "and your cheeks all pink. Don't be angry with me, Tessa. Please. I'm only trying to do what's honestly the right thing for both of us." "Are you? And I'm to be delighted about it? You must be crazy." She rose and shook out her skirts. "Yes, I think you are," she added, "because this isn't the Roger I'm accustomed to who's speaking to me. He was kind, but decisive too. It was one of the things I admired about him. However ... I'll have to get back to the hotel now. Mrs. Cunningham will be wondering what on earth has happened to me. I don't think I'll tell her my engagement is off today. It might spoil the festive atmosphere rather more than somewhat." Roger caught her arm. "I don't want you to tell Mrs. C. or anybody else," he said urgently. "Especially that newspaper fellow from the Dispatch. What he'd print about us beggars the imagination. We're still engaged so far as I'm concerned, Tessa, even though you won't wear my ring." "Not when it's an empty gesture. No, I won't. It doesn't seem to matter to you how much I'm being humiliated." "Tessa my dear, I'm desperately sorry. I do assure you -"

"Indeed you don't," she said, increasing her pace across the grass and pulling her arm away from his grasp. "I'm positive there's something else you haven't told me, but have it your own way. I'm not going to say anything to Johnny or anybody else for the present, though, so you needn't worry. Where are you going to spend this three weeks' holiday, by the way ?" "In Corinth." "Corinth!" Abruptly Tessa stopped. 'That's in Greece. And Lilas is cruising round the Greek islands just now." She looked at Roger, and his eyes told her everything she needed to know. "So that's it! It's Lilas. I should have guessed it. You're going to Corinth to see her, aren't you ?" "Yes, I am," he owned. "She wrote and asked me to meet her there when the cruise ends. Which is the day after tomorrow." "You told me you'd been passionately in love with her," Tessa remembered, "when you were younger. So you're still mad about her, then ? Mad enough to answer her as soon as she chooses to whistle you to heel ? I suppose now Colin has gone she wants another man around." "It isn't quite like that, Tessa," Roger answered. "I was wild about Lilas once. I used to dream about her day and night, and at first she encouraged me. Then she grew bored and we quarrelled and parted. I put her out of my mind and looked elsewhere. She soon got engaged to somebody else. She did have other romances before Kenward, you know." "Yes, I heard about them," Tessa told him. "Faithfulness doesn't seem to be her strongest characteristic." "She's restless. Always searching for novelty. A man would have to master her - Well, when I met you I thought I'd a chance to be happy again. You're everything Lilas isn't, and I wanted that. But after her wedding had been washed up, she came to the office to see her father, and I took her out to lunch to cheer her up a bit. I saw her several times after that too. You were away, so I was left at a loose end in the evenings. Soon I found the old attraction she'd had for me wasn't entirely dead. That's what worries me now. If it isn't, I can't decently marry you, Tessa dear, even if you want me

to. It wouldn't be fair. So I'm flying to Greece in the morning to find out exactly what Lilas does mean to m& nowadays and just where I stand. Now do you comprehend?" Tessa stood on the pavement at the foot of the hotel steps looking at him. The passing crowds jostled and pushed and the traffic roared a foot away, but they might have been alone on a desert island. All her instinctive anger had died away as swiftly as it had flared. What right had she to be resentful anyway because Roger had only done the same thing she had done herself? He had become engaged to her with an ache for Lilas at the back of his mind, thinking he could make himself love another girl and find sufficient happiness with her to blot out the past. She had accepted him with her heart still given to Colin despite herself, imagining in her turn that liking and respect could presently be transformed into love. They were both to blame, yet neither of them was. It wouldn't work and it would never work. You couldn't hope to counterfeit love and pretend it was the real rich golden coin. "Yes, Roger dear," she said to him gently, "I do understand at last. You couldn't possibly do anything else in the circumstances." "That's generous of you," he answered. "You're the girl I always knew you were. So just for the present, to save us both a lot of nasty gossip and scandal, you will consider our engagement temporarily suspended? And then discuss it with me again later on. When I get back from Greece. I may not stay there over-long. I can't tell." "Greece is very romantic, from what I hear," Tessa remarked, "but if you shouldn't find it so, well, let me know and we can take it from there ... No, I'm not going to put the ring on again. I - I'll tell people it was too big and it's gone to be altered. After all, I'm going back to Windlesborough tomorrow, and nobody wears rings there." Together they entered the hotel and crossed the cool thickly-carpeted foyer. "How much longer will you be in Norfolk?" Roger asked her.

"Just over a fortnight. The course finishes on September the twelfth. Then I'm going to Raltia for a holiday. I'm longing to see them all again there, and Caterina -my best friend - is being married the first week in October. So I shan't come back until after her wedding." "Hmmm. Perhaps I could stop off in Italy on my own way home from Greece? It ought to be easy enough." "If you want to see me, I shall be there on the island, Roger. It's so small you'll be able to find me without any trouble." She caught sight of Mrs. Conningham standing by the grill-room door and waved to her. "Now I really must fly," she added. "Goodbye, Roger, and thevery best of luck." For the benefit of Mrs. Cunningham and the rest of the party awaiting her, Tessa stood on tiptoe and kissed Roger's cheek. Then, smiling at him tenderly, affectionately, she turned away and hurried to join her hostess.

CHAPTER X IT was the third week of September, but still brilliantly hot on Raltia. The buildings of the little town lay tumbling like a pile of golden stones at the sea's blue edge and the olive groves shone like beaten silver. In Giuseppe's vineyard there was deep green shade, and Tessa sat down to rest in it for a little while before she continued to descend the rocky path. Dreamily she looked at a goat nibbling the almond leaves and straining hopefully towards a cluster of scarlet poppies which rose from the dusty earth. The faint odour of charcoal drifted to her nostrils, and she heard the sound of a woman's voice singing in the distance as she stood beside the stove, preparing the pasta. It was all so nostalgically familiar. Good to be back once again. Tessa had been on the upper slopes of the mountain, wandering near the tumbledown house in which she had once lived and which was now the home of young Alberto and his bride. Toto, the big cream cat, was fatter than ever, but he still remembered his former mistress, fussing round Tessa's bare legs affectionately. As she stroked him the girl thought suddenly of Snowball and wondered if the gay little dog was missing her in London. Apart from the poodle she had really not given much thought to anybody or anything since she returned to Raltia. Here she was back in the old enchanted web again, the outside world a place so remote it hardly seemed to exist. Only now Tessa did not feel curious and restless about it any more. She knew what that world was like and so she could set it firmly at the back of her mind for the, present, behind a hazy curtain. Of course Tessa recognized that this was only a little breathing-space. Soon she must decide about her future. When Roger told her what decision he had made first. She would accept it without protest even though it hurt her. After all, she had brought this present state of affairs upon herself by leaving Roger so abruptly, running away from London in such a cowardly fashion. She ought to have stopped to think about Roger, but she had only been concerned with her own emotions. Running away seemed to be a characteristic of the Chievers, she had thought bitterly, though in Tarquin's case he had returned to find some happiness after all. But it was done now and she could only wait, suspended, to hear from Roger. Meantime she refused to think about her future, relaxing in the

Raltian sunshine, an honoured guest at the Hotel Moderno, finding pleasure and distraction in the companionship of her friends. Everybody on the island had seemed delighted to have her back. Even sour-tongued old Sophia had remarked that Teresa was like a native child, "though doubtless so grand now we shall not be good enough for long". The warmth of her welcome had been balm to Tessa's lonely heart. Here at least she was wanted and had her individual place in the scheme of things. Mr. Ganni had kissed her hand and several young men had pinched her and Luciana had folded her to an ample bosom, exclaiming at the gifts Tessa had brought her. There was a necklace and a superb box of chocolates and a rose-red cardigan of finest cashmere, designed for the winter days when the sea breezes could blow chill through the old houses. Luciana had touched it with work-worn fingers. "It is so soft, like the breast of a dove," she declared. "Just as the rich tourist-women wear. Is it fitting it should belong to a poor old lace- maker?" "Nothing is too good for you, Luciana," Tessa laughed. "And we shall have a testa as well while I'm here. It's not my birthday this time, but I expect we can think of somebody else who's having their natal day, or find another excuse to sing and dance." 'There will be Caterina's wedding, of course." "Yes, but that's not for another three weeks," Tessa smiled. "I want a festa of my own before that one. And this time I shall buy you everything you need to bake the cake." "Ah, you have money now, then," Luciana remarked. "You found it in England, yes?" "Some my mother had left me in her will. Not a fortune, but enough for what I need." "Do you have enough lire to buy a house?" Luciana enquired. "Because that is what you must do, I think. It is much cheaper to dwell in your own house than at Ganni's hotel. Also you can have a housekeeper, which is more correct for a young girl who lives alone. My cousin Maria could come to

you. Since her husband died she has nobody for whom to cook and sew. You remember Maria who lives near Father Francesco's house ? I will go and speak to her about it tonight." "No, don't do that, Luciana dear," Tessa said. "I'm not going to buy a house because I've no idea how long I shall be staying. I may have to go back to London after Caterina is married. I can't tell yet." "Not stay here ?" Luciana was plainly shocked. "But you would not wish to live anywhere else when you can buy a house on Raltia!" "Perhaps not," Tessa replied, "but there are things in London..." "A lover? Ah, so!" Luciana beamed. 'That is different. You must return to him, eh?" "If he wants me back," Tessa said. "But maybe he doesn't." Bright dark eyes studied her face keenly. "You are unhappy, I think," Luciana pronounced. "Perhaps your love is not smooth and tranquil? Butthen happiness, like the canary, is often difficult to catch." "You must be a witch, Luciana! You can see through people!" "I find wisdom as I grow older, Teresa. Is this an Englishman whom you love in vain?", Tessa nodded. "One of those who came last spring to take our photographs. That tall one with blue eyes. He gazed at you often. I felt then he was falling into love. Signor Col- een." "Colin! Oh, no, Luciana. He's gone away now. I don't even know where to, because he's sold his studio in London." "He has not told you? That is very strange," Luciana observed. "Perhaps he will send for you to follow him soon?" "I'm afraid not."

Before they could pursue the matter, there were shouts in the street below and the sound of a bell being vigorously rung. Luciana had to open her window and yell back, then descend to buy her dinner from the fisherman hawking his newly-caught wares in a big wicker basket. Tessa seized the chance to escape. She could not talk about Colin at any length. Colin to whom she had given her heart, her first love whom she must forget. So that she need not remember him now she went along to the square and sat down in the cafe where several tourists, the last of the season, were sipping aperitifs. She ordered a cool glass, and when Antonio brought it to her, she realized it was iced lemonade: Colin's favourite drink which he had made for her that night they had sat alone together. She wondered if people drank iced lemonade in Hong Kong or wherever he was now, and if Roger liked lemonade and if he and Lilas would be drinking in Greece; sitting on some luxurious hotel terrace, though, the contents of then- glasses would be much more exotic than any fruit drink. That evening Tessa sat on the steps of the fountain, in the shade of the General's statue, with Caterina and Veronica and Elissa. Yet once more she was answering all their eager questions about her father's wedding with Arabella and describing the clothes worn by the bride and the women guests. "It must have been a marvellous sight," Veronica remarked. "How I wish I had been there to see it." "Caterina's wedding will be marvellous too," Tessa declared. "She's having a wedding in the church with a white gown and a veil and everything. Is the gown finished yet, Caterina ?" "Mamma and I have done the embroidery now," Caterina nodded. "Would you like to see it ?" "Yes, please!" So Caterina took them along with her to the rooms above the bakery that were her family home. Four slender young girls walking together over the cobblestones, all wearing the same plain dark cotton skirts and neat white blouses that were not cut too low. Domenico and Guido and several other bachelors eyed them admiringly, sighing noisily as they passed. Caterina was not even aware of it. Her brown eyes were looking dreamily out to sea,

and Tessa knew all her thoughts were with her Pietro, out in his boat with the rest of the fishing fleet now. How wonderful it must be to know your beloved was thinking of you too, hastening back to your side as soon as he could, preparing to make his vows to you in a few days' time and give you his life and protection for ever. She touched the homemade silk wedding dress with tender fingers. She owned many far more expensive and elegant outfits now, but none had the magic of this. She sighed and said impulsively: "You're so lucky, Caterina dear. So very blessed." Next morning Tessa strolled along the waterfront after breakfast, watching the animated scene as the ferry left for Naples and the small boats and yachts flapped and throbbed about their own business. Then she turned her steps down a crooked alley to the narrow house where Tomaso lived, making his rough earthenware pots and bowls for the local housewives or an occasional sink for Varani the builder. Tessa had already paid Tomaso one visit a few days earlier, telling him about her own ceramic work and showing him how to throw an elegantly-shaped little vase. This she had left to bake in his ancient brick oven, and now she wanted to see what it looked like. Bending her head, she passed through the low doorway, to be greeted with vociferous delight. "Your vase - it was magnificent! So beautiful. Of perfect finish too. Now already it has gone." "Gone ? Where, Tomaso ? Have you broken it ?" "But no," he laughed. "I have sold it to an Americano. He bought it for a thousand lire. Imagine! A thousand lire for one little vase. I shall give you half of it, of course," he added quickly. It appeared that the tourist and his wife had come in to see if he had anything they could take home as a Raltian souvenir and noticed the vase standing on the windowsill to cool off. "There you are, you see," Tessa said, brushing aside the notes Tomaso proffered. "No, keep them. I gave you the vase. It's just as I told you the other day. If you'll only make some little pieces in the modern style, then you'lf have a regular market with the visitors every summer."

"But I am getting old," Tomaso pointed out. 'The dog with the grey nose cannot so easily learn the new tricks. Now if you were here yourself to help me, it would be different. We might go into business together if you stay, and earn ourselves much money eh ?" As Tessa looked at him the germ of an idea began to emerge in her mind. If Roger decided not to marry her after all, there was little reason to go back to London for more than an occasional passing visit. Tante Arabella had said there was always a home for her in Kensington, but Tessa knew she would not be entirely happy there. The empty business of being a debutante with all the social merry-go-round was not satisfying, and she could not stay on at the Art School for ever. There were no real friends or ties to keep her in London. She could make Raltia her home instead, for here at least she had a place in things and warm-hearted affectionate companionship. Walking back to the Hotel Moderno, Tessa remembered Luciana's suggestion about buying a little house. There was one near the church, overlooking the harbour, with a tiny garden in which one could grow geraniums and roses and oleanders and a vine that would shoot over the terrace in May and provide a deep shade on the hot afternoons later on. Varini could build a studio beside the house in the coming winter months when men were glad of work. She might get a proper up-to-date kiln over from the mainland and start a small pottery of her own, perhaps with Tomaso to help her. At least it would fill the void in her life when Roger had rejected her. Somehow all at once Tessa felt quite certain that he would. She had heard nothing from him and the days were slipping steadily past. As Tessa went up the hotel steps, Mr. Ganni rushed out and seized her arm. "Ah, at last!" he exclaimed. "We have been searching for you everywhere. There is a gentleman here - a grand English gentleman - who is enquiring for you. He has come specially from Capri in Armano's speedboat, so anxious to find you ..." It was Roger. It must be. Come to her at last. Tessa's heart began to throb as she hastened into the lounge where the shutters were already closed against the midday sun. When her eyes became accustomed to the dimness She saw it was not Roger who got up from the chair but Sir Robert Lawrence.

"Uncle Robert!" Surprise mingled with the disappointment in her voice. Then she recovered herself and went on: "How nice of you to come. It's been ages, hasn't it? Are you on holiday in Capri, then?" He gave her his customary brusque kiss on the cheek. "Yes. Been spending three weeks there, sitting in the sun. Doctor said I needed rest. Overwork, if you please. Just a lot of nonsense. I didn't know you were staying here until I got a letter from Arabella yesterday, or I'd have been across to see you before." "They seem to be enjoying New York," Tessa remarked. "Having a gorgeous time there. And Daddy's show has pleased the critics too." "Splendid. Now what about a cool drink, eh? Do I ring the bell ? I mean, does it sound if I do ? So many of these confounded Italian bells never appear to work." "Yes, you'll get service, Uncle Robert. And you can stay for lunch, I hope ? They give you wonderful fish. Do you like aragosta, that's lobster, done with a savoury sauce and cheese? Or would you prefer an omelette or something light?" "Yes, perhaps that would be best for me. I daresay Lilas will have the lobster. She's fond of it." "Lilas! You mean - she's here with you ?" Tessa asked. "She went to look at that lace in the showcase in the hall," he answered. "I expect she'll be back in a minute or two. Now, how have you been keeping, my dear ? You look extremely fit." "I am. Raltia is awfully healthy. I'm sorry to hear you've been ill, though. And how is Lilas ? Has she - has she quite got over everything now ?" "Kenward, you mean? Oh, yes. Lilas is a sensible girl. Not the type to weep and brood. Between ourselves I wasn't altogether sorry when she broke it off. I was going to finance him, you know, and photography isn't the safest

of investments at that. Now I hope she'll settle for a man with a steady career. Ah, here she is. And I see she's bought some lace." Dangling a strip of Luciana's handiwork, Lilas came up to them, her feet in their gold kid sandals making a soft sound on the mosaic floor. She wore a brilliantly- patterned Capucci shirt and brown satin jeans, her bright hair swept up round her lovely head, her eyelids coloured green, her mouth a startling crimson. As usual Tessa, in her simple cotton dress, felt overwhelmed by her elegantly poised cousin. Then the girl realized this was foolish and she lifted her chin proudly before she spoke. "Good morning, Lilas. How are you? That's an exquisite piece of lace. You were lucky to find a long strip of it. Signora Luciana doesn't make many." "Disgustingly over-priced, though," Lilas remarked. "But I suppose the peasants always grab instinctively. You're brown, but brown, Tessa darling. However do you do it ? So even too." They touched each other's cheeks in a token greeting. Tessa's eyes slid down to Lilas's hand, but the thin crimson-tipped fingers were all bare. Had Roger proposed to her then or not? What had transpired between them in Greece? Could Roger possibly be staying in Capri with the Lawrences now? But Tessa felt that if he was, he would surely have come here today. She longed to know the answers, but she would not, could not put the questions outright now. Presently Tessa took her relations into the dining- room where Veronica, acting as waitress for the tourist season, had decorated a table specially for them with a freshly-laundered checked cloth, a bowl of flowers and a piece of blue ribbon tied round the neck of each wine- bottle, Lilas merely glanced disparagingly as she sat down. During the meal they talked casually, about Capri and Tarquin Chievers' portrait of . Lord Herison, which was receiving much acclaim, and Italian food and Maureen's decision to work for a scientific firm in Canada for the coming year. More than once Tessa wanted to ask about Roger, but stopped herself because it might lead to awkward questions from her uncle at least.

Afterwards Sir Robert agreed he would like to enjoy the siesta hour in one of the wicker chairs in the back garden, a quiet and shady spot. Tessa took Lilas up to her own room to change for a session on the beach. Not surprisingly Lilas's beach-bag proved to contain a sensational bikini of black and white silk, with an enormous emerald-green cape to go over it. When Lilas had put it on, she stood in front of the little mirror preening herself. "Ye-es. I think that's passable. How can you manage with this postage-stamp glass, Tessa? It's completely inadequate." "All right for me," Tessa replied. "But then I'm not a professional beauty like you." "Do I detect the teeniest note of spite in that remark, angel ?" "Do you ? I wouldn't know." Lilas gave herself a final approving glance. 'Tell me," she said, turning back to her cousin, "how is Roger these days ? You're still engaged to him 2" Tessa gave back glance for glance. "Surely he told you that when you met in Corinth. Did you have an amusing holiday there ?" "Yes, a positively adorable week," Lilas smiled. "Then we had a few days together in Athens afterwards. Now that's really a city you should visit. Exquisitely romantic. Much more so than Rome. I flew back there with Roger on his way home, and then we heard about Daddy coming out for a rest, so we waited until he arrived. It was quite a void for me when Roger had to go back at last." "I'm sure it was," Tessa remarked. "You must have a man in attendance, naturally." "So glad you understand, angel. But no doubt Roger has told you all this in a letter ? Or perhaps you haven't received one yet. You will, though. I expect it's in the post."

Tessa did not answer. She had put a long blue linen tunic over her own one-piece swimsuit, and now she belted it at the waist without looking at the other girl. Lilas continued sweetly: "You're not going to marry him, you know. So don't imagine you are, my pet. I'm stopping all your chances in that direction. Effectively, but most effectively." Somehow Tessa believed it, though she would not admit the fact now. "You certainly flatter yourself, Lilas," she made herself reply evenly. "Now just how are you going to do that, I wonder?" Lilas smiled mockingly. "Why, keep Roger stringing along with me," she answered. "He'll be there if I want him. He's always been crazy about me ever since we were children. Didn't you know that either? What a quaint little innocent you are, to be sure! Oh, yes, I've only to crook my finger and whistle and Roger will be there." "Do you mean you're in love with him, Lilas ? That you want to marry him yourself ?" "Marry Roger!" Lilas laughed scornfully. "What a mad, but positively lunatic idea. I couldn't stand a husband so stodgy and conservative as Roger, even though I expect the parents would be entranced to have him as a son-in-law. Especially the male one. No, I just want to take him away from you, that's all." "But why ?" Tessa gasped. "Why do you want to hurt me ? Do you hate me, then ?" "Frankly, sweet, I don't exactly adore you. So I thought you should be humiliated to teach you a lesson." "We've never been congenial, I know, But this - it's horrible. What have I ever done to make you feel so vindictive ?" "You spoiled Colin for me, that's what, dear little Tessa. Don't play innocent now. Remember how I found you that night I came to his studio. Telling him

you loved him. I heard you. I'd probably have heard a good deal more too if your wretched poodle hadn't started yapping and let you know I was there. I must say it was a surprise. I'd never suspected that angle before. So I had a flaming row with Colin about it after you'd fled." "But I never attempted to take Colin away from you, Lilas. He was loyal to you always. Why, except at the engagement party when you were with him the whole time I never so much as spoke to him again." "Immaterial, because you made Colin's mind up anyway," Lilas said. "He told me he hadn't been making love to you as I seemed to think, because he remembered he was engaged to me. If he hadn't been, things might have been different, he said. So I informed him that you were already booked, going to marry Roger in fact. Eventually we decided to let sleeping dogs lie." 'Tjjen what went sour?" Tessa wondered. "Why didn't you marry that Thursday as you'd planned ?" "Because, my wide-eyed cousin, Colin suddenly appeared when I was in the middle of the final fitting for my bridal gown and told me he'd been walking around all night long thinking things over. Now he wanted the wedding called off. Talked a lot of trash about ambition not being everything and so forth. I didn't think he could really mean it until he saw Daddy and cancelled the partnership contract between them. Then he just walked out into the blue." "But where is Colin now ? Do you know ?" Lilas shrugged her shoulders. "I'm clueless," she answered. "He used to say he'd like to write a Far East travel book illustrated with his own photographs. China and Tibet and Malaya - places like that. So maybe that's what he's doing now. Not that I particularly care." "No. You don't care about anything or anybody under the sun except yourself," Tessa flared. "You're so self-centred it's almost unbelievable. You're foul! There's no other word for you."

"Ah, you're wild about losing Roger. Of course." "How can you treat Roger in such a cynical fashion ? I've a good mind to write and tell him exactly what you've just said to me." Lilas laughed with frank amusement. "Do, darling. It won't make a scrap of difference, you know. I shall still have that fatal fascination for him. He won't be able to resist me anyway. Isn't sex-attraction a wonderful thing?" "It's a horrible one, the way you use it. To think of a man like Roger who's so kindly and decent having to dance on the end of your rope - Ugh! It's beyond description." 'Then don't try to find the words," Lilas advised as she picked up her bag. "We'll just cry quits and go along to this beach of yours. I hope the swimming is reasonably good." Tessa went because there was nothing else to be done in the circumstances. She recognized Lilas was only speaking the truth when she flaunted her power over Roger. What was it that drew a man to a woman so strongly, even while he knew she was not good for him ? With Lilas it must be this sheer physical beauty, displayed to the full again now as she walked gracefully down on to the sand. The lounging party of Americans stared at her boldly and the two Yorkshire schoolteachers paused in their knitting and the nearby fishermen looked up from their nets to exclaim and whistle in admiration. Even as Tessa felt she detested this spoiled, malicious girl, she had to admit Lilas's vivid spell. Neither of them mentioned Colin or Roger again. They spoke only casually until four o'clock came when they returned to the hotel to change and collect Sir Robert. Veronica brought a dish of pastries into the garden and clips of tea which Tessa had once shown her how to make. It was only when Tessa escorted her two guests down to the harbour to sail back to Capri that she had the opportunity to exchange a few private words with her uncle. He glanced at Lilas, who was lingering to look at some picture postcards a boy held out to her with a persuasive smile. Then Sir Robert dropped his voice and said quietly: "Good of you to entertain us today, Tessa. I know you two

girls don't always hit it off and I didn't want to bring her along, actually, but she insisted." "I'm glad you did, Uncle Robert." "Too confoundedly self-willed. That's always been her trouble. I suffer from it myself too." "That's all right. I understand." He patted her hand. "You're a nice girl, my dear," he said. "Remember you've always got a friend in me if you'rp ever in need of a helping hand. You might be wanting some advice; about your future now, eh ?" "Perhaps I shall. It does seem rather undecided." "Well, you know where to come. I suppose things are a bit tricky now you've broken it off with young Seagrave. Not that I ever thought you were suited to each other. Anyhow, you're pretty enough to attract another fellow quite soon, and I hope you'll be better matched up next time." Lilas caught up with them, and Tessa exchanged final goodbyes and watched them get into their motor-boat. As she watched it speeding off through the water, she felt another chapter in her life was closing now. She must turn over a new page in the morning. The vague notions in her mind were starting to crystallize, and walking back to the hotel, she turned them over once more. She would buy that little house beyond the harbour wall, have it redecorated and provided with some modern comforts from Naples and get Varani to add a small studio in which she could work at her pottery. While he and his men were busy, she would fly back to London, but not for a long stay. Just a few weeks, to see Tarquin and Arabella when they got home from their honeymoon and coax her stepmother to let her have Snowball for her own. She would take some more lessons at the Art School, too, and find out exactly what equipment she would need. By the end of the year she could be back in Raltia again, and this time to stay.

The letter that arrived next morning seemed an anticlimax. Not even a disappointment any longer because she knew what it would tell her before she, opened it. I did intend to come and see you while we were in Rome, but Lilas thought it better I should write.... I loathe the idea of hurting you, Tessa, but it would be no use my marrying you when Lilas has such power over me. Not that I understand it. I can even see her faults and I detest all this publicity she demands, but the attraction is there just the same, and so strong I can't ignore it... Tessa only read it through once. Then she tore the sheet into strips and tossed them into the sea. Luciana was delighted when Tessa told her what she proposed to do. "I will speak with Maria at once. She must not go to Ischia to seek work when you will need her so soon. You are wise to stay here in Raltia, because then Signor Coleen will find you waiting for him when he returns." Tessa sighed. "He isn't coming back,' Luciana. He's gone for ever. Wandering about the world. So I'm going to forget all about him. It's the only way. And now I must rush and change my clothes, because I'm helping Caterina do her door tonight." "So. Pietro has brought her a can of paint from Naples, then?" "Yes. A glorious shade of pink. It's going to be the smartest front door in town." Caterina's bridal home was only a two-roomed hut in the fisherman's quarter, but loving hands had made it fresh and gay. Everybody on Raltia seemed to have contributed something, either in kind or in work. Her unmarried friends had sewn the handsome quilt which would cover the wall-bed. Tessa herself had put in a few stitches in the approved manner. Surveying the door now, Tessa was swept by a wave of self-pity. If only she too could have been preparing a home with stars in her eyes! Her own little house by the harbour or any other house anywhere in the world. It wouldn't

matter so long as Colin's arms were round her and she knew they were going to belong to each other for ever. It was a week after Caterina's wedding before all Tessa's arrangements were complete. She had signed the deed'for the house, and Varani knew exactly what he had to do, putting in a new stove and other improvements brought over from the mainland. Now everything was settled, and Tessa felt in sombre mood as she went towards Luciana's home to bid the old lady arrivederci. To her surprise Luciana was standing at the end of her street, apron folded over her arms as though she was waiting for somebody. "Ah, you come," she exclaimed. "I have been thinking of you. You leave on the ferry in the morning, then?" "Yes. I catch the two o'clock plane from Naples to London. This time tomorrow I shall be in Kensington again." Listening to Bobs talking about the honeymooners and wondering if Johnny knew she was here to start ringing up for an interview, and never taking Snowball for a walk near Knightsbridge in case he turned into Comberry Place by mistake. "I wish I didn't have to go," she added, "but there it is." Luciana bent forward to look earnestly into the girl's grey eyes. "But before you leave Raltia, you must first go up the mountain and whisper to the stars. Ask them to send you happiness." "No, I don't want to talk to your stars, Luciana. I did it on my birthday as you told me. I asked them to send me a lover, but it didn't work out." "It will be different this time. I swear it to you. Go up the mountain, Teresa mia, if only to please your friend, old Luciana. Whisper to the stars once more. I beg of you." "We-ell, if you feel like this about it," Tessa said. "I'll go now, then. It's getting dark. It won't take long and I can come back to the square and see you and everybody there for a farewell glass of wine." Smiling affectionately at the lace-maker's superstitions, Tessa made her way up the mountain path she had trodden so often in the past. It was the magical

hour of the Mediterranean dusk, the light dimming over the sea as the western sky turned from rose to gold then melted softly into deepest blue. All the scents of autumn came to Tessa as she mounted the rough stony track. She wore one of the local shawls over her dress, and now she pulled it more closely round her shoulders as the breeze swept down from the peak above her. When she reached her favourite rock, she sat down and clasped her hands round her knees. Yet once more she began to dream about Colin, conjuring up a vision of him in her mind's eye. She remembered his tall figure and the easy way he moved, his thick untidy brown hair and his face with those blue eyes' that could be amused or searching or tender as the mood took him. Now he almost seemed to be standing here in front of her - wearing an old tweed jacket she had never seen before, holding out his hand. "Hello there, Tessa," he was saying. "Remember me ?" She stared at the vision unbelievingly. "You can't be here, though," she told herself. "I haven't even asked the stars for you yet. I haven't whispered your name ... Colin! Is it really you ?" "Who else?" he replied. "Yes, it's me, and this is you. Doing these funny Yoga exercises or whatever they are, just as you were the first time I ever saw you. Only you mustn't fall off the rock again." He reached up and took her hands to swing her down to the ground beside him. His grasp was warm and firm and she quivered with joy at the discovery. "Colin! Colin! I thought you were in China or somewhere. How did you get here ?" "Jet air-liner from Singapore. We touched down at Naples this morning and I came over as soon as I could find a boat. I'm staying at the old lady's place. The one where we had your birthday festa." "With Luciana? Of course! That explains everything. She told you I was up here, didn't she ?"

"Yes. She said I must follow you. She also said you'd be glad to see me. Are you, Tessa ?" "You know I am," she answered. "You're my love, my one and only true love. You always have been and you always will be." The next moment she was in his arms. She clung to him, feeling his head bend over her own, his hard warm cheek upon her face. She felt his lips, and in that moment of release she gave her own lips to him without restraint. She had no consciousness or thought of anything save the realization that this was Colin here with her at last. "My dear heart," he said against her throat. When his mouth did relinquish hers, he held her a little way from him to look at her in passionate wonder. "How did you find me?" she asked him. "How did you know where I was?" "I found I wanted more money than I'd bargained for," he told her. "So I cabled Bill Janes from Hong Kong to fix things for me. When he wrote back, he sent me a cutting from the Morning Dispatch saying you'd broken off your engagement to Seagrave and gone back to Raltia. Then I knew I must see you again." "Lilas was here for a day a few weeks ago. So you didn't want to marry her either, after all ?" "A man can pay too high a price for success, Tessa my darling. At the last moment I couldn't pay the one I was being asked, especially as I'd realized in the meantime that it was you I loved and wanted. I'm a comparatively poor man now, you know." "I don't mind." "I thought somehow you wouldn't... Kiss me again, sweetheart, and say you love me. Promise to marry me soon, won't you? I'm not so poverty-stricken I can't afford a wife at least."

"I'll marry you anyway, Colin. I wonder how long it would take Father Francesco to get our marriage papers through ? - Oh, but I'm supposed to be travelling to London tomorrow!" she remembered. "That's fine. Now I can go with you," he said, kissing her cheek lightly. "Italian law being what it is, I think it might be quicker and easier if we got married there. We can go straight out to Singapore afterwards and I can get on with my book." "Singapore! We won't come back to Raltia, then?" she wondered. "One day, of course, we'll return to our enchanted island," he promised. "But for the next couple of years I'll be wandering all over the East collecting my material. Do you think you could live that way, Tessa? Just with a few suitcases and a lot of notebooks and cameras ?" Tessa laughed and wound her arms about his neck, to draw his face down to hers again. "It's not what I'd planned," she said. "I was going to settle here and start a little pottery. But it doesn't matter. If that's the way you want us to live, that's what I want too. My love. My love. My own dear love ..." "What are you doing?" he asked her a few minutes later as she slipped from his embrace to stand with her face upturned to the sky. "Just whispering to the stars and saying 'thank you'," Tessa answered. Then she lifted her lips once more for a kiss that held all the promise of the lovely happiness ahead.

Mills & Boon's Paperbacks JANUARY CINDY, TREAD LIGHTLY BY KARIN MUTCH At Cindy's first dramatic meeting with Stuart Newman in the Queen City, she sensed a kind of ruthlessness about him - ruthlessness of touch, manner and determination in that nothing should or would stand in his way. He was a man who took what he wanted regardless and not counting the cost. And Cindy knew that he wanted her. But she had no illusions about the reasons for Stuart's advances to her. "What are you trying to do, Mr. Newman," she asked him, "boost that trampled masculine pride of yours ? For I presume it has been trampled by that woman in the photograph. Do you want to use me to assure yourself that your charm hasn't lost its effect over the female?" Stuart's friend Paul bet Stuart that Stuart could not get Cindy to fall for him within one month - one month "to conquer your respectable backblock secretary." Who would win? LOVE MADE THE CHOICE BY MARY BURCHELL First paperback edition of Mary Burchell's famous novel! THE MAN IN AUTHORITY BY JEAN S. MACLEOD It was not love that drew Moira Lang closer and closer to the man she was nursing. Her heart had been given, from their first meeting, to his brother, Grant, but Grant was, it seemed, in thrall to a tragic memory. Even if that had not been so, Grant had hurt Philip once, against his will; never would he deliberately take away the one thing that Philip had left to live for. The story of Moira Lang unfolds against a background which moves from an ocean-going liner in tropic seas to the cool wards of an English hospital. THE SILVER FISHES BY LUCY GILLEN When Loen went to Morly House to work It was to help the charming Lady Kanderton to write a book - and very pleasant work it was too; in no time at all Loen had settled in like one of the family. But there was one big snag, for the job threw her into far too much contact with Richard Maxwell. On the face of it, a situation that most girls would not have complained about, for Richard was very attractive indeed - the complete ladies' man. Strings of girls came into Richard's life - and went out again as he moved on to his next conquest - and Loen was determined not to become just one of them. 3s. 6d. net per title