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Published by Dreamspinner Press 4760 Preston Road Suite 244-149 Frisco, TX 75034 http://www.dreamspinnerpress.com/ This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events or locales is entirely coincidental. Love Ahead Copyright © 2008 Madeleine Urban and Abigail Roux Cover Design by Mara McKennen This book is licensed to the original purchaser only. Duplication or distribution via any means is illegal and a violation of International Copyright Law, subject to criminal prosecution and upon conviction, fines and/or imprisonment. This eBook cannot be legally loaned or given to others. No part of this eBook can be shared or reproduced without the express permission of the publisher. To request permission and all other inquiries, contact Dreamspinner Press at: 4760 Preston Road, Suite 244-149, Frisco, TX 75034 http://www.dreamspinnerpress.com/ Released in the United States of America June, 2008 eBook edition available in Adobe PDF, MobiPocket and MS Reader formats. eBook ISBN: 978-0-9817372-5-6
To my Boo, for his unending support and excitement on my behalf. ~Madeleine
Under Contract | 1
A loud clang, crash, crunch, and tinkle was not what Ted Lucas wanted to hear on a bright and sunny Monday morning. Not at all. He rolled his chair back from the blueprints, grabbed his hard hat, and ducked as he jumped out of the trailer, skipping the stairs altogether. He ran around the corner of the huge cinderblock foundation and stopped in his tracks. “Goddammitalltahell! What’s going on out here?” he yelled at the top of his lungs. Everyone stopped. Some looked confused, some looked amused, and some had that ‘deer-in-the-headlights-oh-my-God-I’m-going-to-die’ look on their faces. Nick Cooper stood with his foot on a length of pipe from the bundle that had crashed to the ground. He looked up at the bobbing White Hard Hat of Doom when it came tear-assing around the corner and raised an eyebrow. “Morning, boss,” he greeted with a calm smirk, knowing the cheeky greeting wasn’t likely to smooth Lucas’s feathers any. He’d ceased trying to smooth the man’s feathers about a week after first meeting him. It was a bit more interesting to ruffle them every now and then. Lucas practically growled, looking over the mess: a bundle of piping spilled off a cart, two sets of drywall sheets smashed, a window broken, and probably a fucking partridge in a pear tree shitting somewhere. He looked around at the workers milling about, lips compressing. “Boo!” he suddenly screeched – and most of the men jumped and scuttled off. Sanders, the electrician who had received one too many shocks over the years, passed clean out from the scare.
2 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux “What the hell, man?” Cooper muttered as he watched his crew beat a hasty retreat. “I have to find a new job,” he grumbled, bending to heft a nearby rock and stick it under the pipes to keep them from rolling further. Hands clenching into fists, Lucas walked over and started to shift the trolley so they could stack the pipe back onto it. “We’re already two weeks behind. I’ve got supply delays, a skittish electrician, a mudder who streaks, and now this,” he said under his breath. “I’m gonna get skinned.” Cooper glanced behind him and frowned down at the unconscious electrician. “He’s like one of those goats that passes out when you clap. You think we should check his pulse?” he asked casually. “Man, that’d shoot the company insurance to shit, huh?” he asked a little evilly. “Jesus Christ, Cooper, don’t tempt fate,” Lucas practically begged, pushing his hard hat back and rapping his forehead against the thick bar handle on the trolley. “You know, maybe if you didn’t shout everything you said, half your crew would still have their hearing,” Cooper pointed out as he wiped his sleeve over his dirty cheek. Lucas looked like he was chewing on something sour. “Hell. Half of ’em are deaf anyway from all the machinery,” he muttered, bending over again to help the other man pick up the heavy pipes. “What’d you say?” Cooper shouted, barely keeping a straight face as he tilted his head and cupped his ear. The foreman just rolled his eyes. Not too many people got away with prodding at him like Cooper did. It was probably because Cooper was damn good at what he did. It didn’t hurt that he was almost as tall as Lucas, although he didn’t carry the same muscle mass. It also didn’t hurt that Lucas thought about him at all hours…. Within several minutes they had the pipes and glass cleaned up, and some brave souls flitted in to start replacing the drywall. Sanders was dragged into the shade until he woke up. “What happened, anyway?” Lucas asked. It was 9 a.m. on a Monday. He shouldn’t be tired already. It made him cranky.
Under Contract | 3 “I don’t know, it wasn’t my day to babysit,” Cooper answered with a matter-of-fact shrug. “I just saw the pipes running away and threw myself in front of them. I deserve a bonus, I think,” he told his boss with a sad nod. Lucas’s head snapped up, and he looked Cooper over carefully. “You don’t look hurt. Are you hurt?” He started walking to the side, looking the other man up and down. No blood. No bones sticking out. No gashes or tears in his clothes. Just the usual dirt and sweat. “Mental anguish,” Cooper drawled, the smirk finally surfacing as he readjusted his heavy work gloves and glanced sideways as the boss man looked him over. The foreman sighed and crossed his arms, trying to hide the intense relief that flooded him. “Anything else, Mr. Assistant Smartass Foreman?” “No, sir, Mr. Hardass Foreman, sir.” Cooper snickered and sketched a mock salute and bow as he turned to go back to work. Growling again under his breath, Lucas stalked back to the trailer. He’d better not stay or he’d catch himself ogling. That wouldn’t be good. To take his mind off his rather inappropriate thoughts, he reminded himself that he still had to find the discrepancy in those manifests, which reminded him that he hated paperwork. He’d much rather be out swinging a hammer or driving a frontloader or drawing blueprints from scratch. The rest of Monday passed without any other mishaps, and after reviewing the section reports, Lucas was feeling a bit better. Apparently Cooper had lit a fire under some of the men, because several of the crews had made up two to three days’ work today. Grabbing for his hard hat, Lucas realized he still had it on his head. Sighing, he left the trailer – for only the second time that day, he thought miserably – looking for his assistant. At that moment, his assistant was up to his elbows, literally, in drying plaster mix. Cooper knelt in front of the bucket, lips pressed tightly together, praying to God that they would find the chisel before Lucas came out of his trailer. It was almost quitting time, and he’d be prowling out here any second.
4 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux Lucas looked around the building, checking the rooms, before heading out back. He saw Cooper from behind before he saw anything else, and he immediately quashed his first response – a decidedly physical one – to Cooper’s body. It was a response that he tried not to admit even to himself that he had (and had and had and had), and he moved on. “Hey, Cooper, you know, from behind it looks like you’re up to your… el… bows… what the hell?” “You weren’t exactly supposed to see this,” Cooper responded grumpily as he glanced to the side, trying to turn and see the man without actually lifting the bucket full of plaster up to do so. The foreman just stared. It was so hysterically funny that he couldn’t even laugh. He actually bit his lip. Hard. “Do I even want to know?” “I did it before I could think about it, okay?” Cooper said defensively as the runner finally came jogging up with the chisel. “Be careful with that fucking thing, man, remember my fingers are down there,” Cooper growled. His usually amiable personality, especially compared to Lucas’s typical pissiness, did a lot toward making the men like and respect him. That meant that when he shouted or growled, well… the men quaked. He turned back to glance at the boss as the trembling chisel was placed against the hardening plaster. “One of the guys dropped his damn wedding ring in it, and I reached in to grab it before it could dry up. Then when I couldn’t get my hand out, I reached in with the other to pull it out,” he admitted, hoping the flush of embarrassment was covered by his deep tan. The stupidity of the act was due mostly to the fact that he hadn’t gotten more than three hours of sleep last night, but he didn’t mention that. It was hard not to offer it as an excuse, though. Lucas actually winced when he heard the first crack of the plaster. “That’s still going to hurt like hell,” he murmured, accompanied by a sideways glare from Cooper. “Once you’re free, come over to the trailer. I’ve got some solvent to get the shit off without pulling off all the skin.” “Yeah, okay,” Cooper grumbled, flushing deeper as he turned back to watch the slow progress of the chipping. “Someone get a fucking knife
Under Contract | 5 over here and slice open this fucking bucket!” he shouted in uncharacteristic frustration. Lucas backed away and caught himself looking at Cooper from behind again. Closing his eyes tightly, he made himself turn around and walk back to the trailer. He spent some time digging in the closet for the solvent, and even more time digging under the sink for the wide trough bucket. He’d just pulled it all out when he heard someone on the steps outside the trailer. Outside, Cooper huffed and kicked at the door, unable to knock with his hands. God forbid he get plaster all over Lucas’s office door; the man would go apeshit. Hurrying to the door, Lucas pushed it open and held it so Cooper could get up the stairs. He grimaced when he caught sight of the other man’s arms, still mostly coated with hardened and clinging plaster, a smattering of shallow cuts to go along with the damage. Once he let the door shut, he walked back into the bathroom, running warm water into the trough and then adding the solvent. “All right, thing about this shit is, it’s going to sting like hell once it gets down to your skin. But that’s how you’ll know you can start wiping the plaster off. It gets all soft like wallpaper paste,” he explained, carefully carrying the trough out to the small table. “Great,” Cooper muttered, stepping up to the table and poking three fingers into the stuff distastefully. The many cuts, blisters, and cracks in his work-hardened fingertips began to flame, but he closed his eyes and simply dunked both arms into the stuff, all the way to his elbows. Lucas went back to the bathroom and turned on the shower, near full hot. He knew Cooper would want to get that solvent off as soon as possible. It hurt like absolute hell, but it was still better than trying to pull the plaster bits off. That was excruciating. He headed back into the main room of the trailer – there were only three – and waited, trying not to think about how attractive the quiet stoicism was. Or about the shower the man would soon be stepping into…. Cooper didn’t wince, not once, as the solvent burned its way through the plaster and then started working on his skin. He calmly wiped
6 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux at his forearms and hands, his face betraying nothing as he did so. He wanted to scream. Or at least kick something. Cry, maybe. Cry a lot. When he had taken as much as he could stand and the plaster was mostly goop once more, he stood abruptly and nodded at the shower he could hear running. “Go on,” Lucas said hoarsely. He could see the strain around the other man’s eyes and the set of his jaw. He knew how much it hurt. “The hot water will finish dissolving the plaster and wash off the solvent.” Cooper nodded wordlessly and headed for the shower, his eyes nearly watering now as he stepped into the hot water. He was lucky that he had been wearing a T-shirt today, he supposed, as opposed to his usual flannel. At least the short sleeves wouldn’t be ruined by the plaster. He didn’t care if it got wet, though. The hot water burned almost like the solvent had, and he gritted his teeth and washed the remnants off as his body began to shiver with the stinging pain, then he reached up and turned the shower to cold to soothe the burning. He wasn’t sure what hurt worse, his arms or his pride. He fucking knew better than to dive into something like that, much less something that would harden, for chrissake! When he stepped out of the shower his entire front was soaked, and he shook like a dog and trudged out into the outer room, trying to hold his head high still. “Thanks, boss,” he murmured as he placed the gold ring that had been clutched in his hand on the table beside the trough. “Give that to fucking Nelson if you see him before I do,” he muttered as he headed for the door. Lucas could tell Cooper was upset, probably more so with himself than anything, and his pride stinging to boot. “Hey, Cooper,” he said, trying to get him to stop. “Wait, this stuff will help,” he said, holding up a spray bottle. “Help with the burning, I mean.” Cooper glanced down at the little bottle and back up at Lucas dubiously. “That’s okay,” he muttered. “Thanks,” he added as he turned to the door, eager to get away and go home to lick his wounds. The foreman rolled his eyes. “You’re as goddamn stubborn as I am. Now c’mere. I know what that burn feels like, and believe me, not much will help it but this.” He held up the bottle and shook it between two fingers.
Under Contract | 7 Cooper stopped and sighed heavily, turning back to face his boss and holding out his wet arms obediently as the window unit switched on and started blowing icy air onto his wet shirt. He shivered uncontrollably and felt the hair on his arms and neck stand on end. “If it gets much colder in this damn trailer my nipples are going to cut through my damn shirt,” he muttered to his boss. Both Lucas’s eyebrows raised as he started spraying up and down Cooper’s arms. He really, really wanted to make a comment, and not a smartass one, so he literally bit his tongue and hoped Cooper didn’t notice. Spraying evenly, he made sure every bit of skin got wet with the neutralizer. He took a wrist and turned it so he could spray the solution around Cooper’s fingers, making sure any cuts or abrasions he saw were well soaked. Then Lucas switched to the other arm, trying not to overly enjoy the contact. Cooper cleared his throat as he watched the strangely gentle motions of his hardass foreman, glancing up apologetically. “Sorry,” he muttered. “Long day.” “Yeah,” Lucas agreed in an uncharacteristically quiet voice, hoping Cooper wouldn’t notice his face was flushed. “Here, you better take the bottle. I learned from experience that you might need it for a couple of days.” He swallowed and offered the green plastic container to him. Cooper nodded once more and took the bottle, glancing up at Lucas one last time. “You okay, bossman?” he asked seriously. The foreman’s eyes widened as Cooper looked right at him. Directly. “I, uh… I was just remembering when I learned about that stuff,” he said awkwardly, barely restraining himself from shuffling his feet. Shit, shit, shit. This was why he didn’t like to let the staff in the trailer. Because he didn’t want to let Cooper in the trailer. Because he didn’t want to talk to Cooper one-on-one. Because he didn’t want Cooper to figure out what a lovesick idiot he worked for. Because he didn’t want Cooper to know how attracted his boss was to him. Aw, hell. Because he was sure to make himself look like a fool, and he was equally sure Cooper would thrash him like a ninety-pound weakling after finding out.
8 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux “Dive in headfirst, too, did ya?” Cooper asked with a small smile, completely oblivious to Lucas’s mental ramble. “Well, we all have our Darwin moments,” he offered as consolation with a little laugh, taking a step back and toward the door. He had been aware of the foreman’s discomfort with him for quite a while, though he had never figured out the reason for it. It was partly why he’d put in for a transfer to another crew after this job was over. He didn’t like being where he wasn’t wanted. “I’ll leave you to it,” he said with a tap of the bottle of neutralizer to his hairline in a mock salute. “Thanks for the first aid.” Lucas nodded. He almost opened his mouth to say something else – he wasn’t sure what – but swallowing hard, he figured it was better to stay quiet. “Night,” he managed. “Try to actually go home tonight, hmm?” Cooper teased as he opened the door and stepped out onto the top step. “Night, boss.” This is it, Lucas told himself. This is it, and you’re missing it. He’s walking away, and you’re letting him. For the second time, you’re letting someone you love walk away without saying anything to him about it. Despite his inner voice screaming, Lucas was convinced he wasn’t going to say anything, because all the want and fear balled up inside him to clog his throat. But…. “Nick?” Cooper stopped short and turned, holding the flimsy trailer door open with his shoulder. “Sir?” he asked in surprise, shocked to hear his first name from the man. He thought it might have been the first time. Lucas wondered if he looked as surprised as Cooper sounded. “Ah… wanna get a beer?” he asked. Cooper blinked at his boss stupidly. Lucas never went out with the rest of them. They considered themselves favorites if Lucas remembered anything personal about them – like their names, for instance. Cooper had always assumed it was a chain of command kind of thing, leaving it to him to keep up with the crew’s birthdays, divorces, children, deaths… it had never bothered him, it was just the way things were. He wondered if something was wrong. “Uhh… yeah, sure,” he stuttered in answer. “I, uh… I’ll need to change,” he pointed out with a little smile and a gesture to his wet clothes.
Under Contract | 9 The foreman nodded several times, looking down at his own jeans, work boots and paint-splattered work shirt. “Yeah, umm, meet you in the lot in ten minutes?” Lucas asked tentatively. Cooper gave a half smile and a nod. “Yeah,” he responded simply, hoping his confusion and surprise weren’t all too obvious. After lingering for a brief moment, he turned to go, thumping down the steps gracelessly and making his way across the site with long, sure strides. Eyes wide, Lucas stared for a moment, then hurried to the door to watch Cooper cross toward the other trailers set aside for lockers and washrooms. He gasped for air, realized he’d been holding his breath, and sagged against the door. “Aw, hell,” he whispered. What had he gotten himself into now? What did he think he was going to do? He’d been in this situation before, and it hadn’t turned out well. Actually, it hadn’t turned out at all. Lucas had fallen in love with Randy Baker, a man who was his lover, but stupid him, he’d never breathed a word about how he felt. Who’d want to love him, a big, boorish construction worker? Lucas had been scared of scaring Randy away. Instead, time and career did the job for him, and Lucas had let his lover transfer across the country without a word. They’d parted amicably with a fond kiss goodbye on Lucas’s doorstep as Randy headed off to a new exciting chapter in his life, unknowingly leaving a broken heart behind. Then Lucas moved here to Birmingham, and he swore he’d never let it happen again, that he’d at least say something, anything, should he happen to lose his heart again. But to his continual frustration, Lucas just couldn’t make himself spit it out. He’d known the first time he set eyes on the unattainable Nick Cooper that he was in love, and he’d also known it was impossible. By the time Lucas got a handle on his panic, five minutes had passed – sending him running about the trailer like an elephant on stampede. He yanked clean jeans and a black T-shirt out of a duffel while hopping on one foot, trying to get his work boots off, and managed to fall right over onto the floor like a felled tree, still struggling with his laces. Cooper bypassed the crew trailers and headed for his truck. He always kept a spare set of clothing in there. Not exactly for just such an occasion, seeing as how plaster baths were normally frowned upon, but
10 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux close enough. He tugged his shirt over his head and tossed it into the bed of the truck as he opened up the back door of the crew cab. He knew he had clean clothes in here somewhere. He finally found the shirt he was looking for; a soft, faded flannel that was likely to be rags soon enough, and he slung it over the side of the truck as a few of the crew began to wander out, on their way home. They called out to him with affectionate greetings and waved their hardhats through the air at him teasingly, asking him if he was going out drinking tonight or if he planned to run home to his girlfriend who none of them were allowed to meet. “It’s a boys’ night,” Cooper laughed in return as he pulled off his boots and set them carefully aside. He looked around the lot to make certain no one from outside the crew was around, and then unbuttoned his jeans and slid them down, tossing them in the back as well as he stood there in his briefs and reached into his truck for another pair. Across the site, Lucas flew out of the trailer still pulling his T-shirt over his head, skipping all three steps and yanking himself around the corner as he tried to run and tuck his shirt in at the same time. Dragging a hand through his hair, not noticing the dark blond curls springing up all over after being under the hard hat most of the day, he slid to a halt in the sand, barely stopping from slamming into the low concrete wall that separated the parking lot from the construction site. He glanced at his watch. Twelve minutes. Shit. He jogged into the lot, looking around for Cooper’s truck. Cooper had just shrugged into his shirt and was buttoning it up slowly after digging out his scuffed cowboy boots and sliding into them. He glanced up to see Lucas jog into the lot, and smiled slightly. The man looked almost nervous. A sudden dropping feeling hit Cooper, and he wondered again if it was bad news. Lucas had been talking about problems. Oh, God, what if they were looking at layoffs? He’d be expected to break it to the boys.… Again sliding to a stop, eyes frozen on the bared chest being slowly covered, the foreman cleared his throat and stuck a hand in his jeans pocket, trying to act casual when he had no clue how to go about it as he paced the rest of the way to Cooper’s truck. “Uh. Sorry. Took a
Under Contract | 11 little longer than I expected,” he murmured, suddenly realizing he was staring. He dropped his eyes and shuffled a little. “That’s okay, took me a while to find my clothes,” Cooper responded with a smile. “I usually hang around until everyone’s gone anyway, just in case. Y’know. Did you want to go out with the boys or… somewhere… just us?” he asked, trying not to sound like he was dreading what his boss had to say. “Uh. I’m sure the guys wouldn’t want me around after hours of putting up with me,” Lucas said honestly, not thinking of the fact that he’d been in the trailer all day. “How about Petey’s?” he asked, naming a sports bar where many of the crew ate lunch. Cooper nodded and smiled gamely, licking his lips and stepping away from his truck to shut the back door. “Want to ride with me or…?” Lucas’s eyes got wide. That was Cooper’s tongue. Cooper’s tongue licking Cooper’s lips. He gawked for a long moment before shaking himself. “Ah, yeah, sure. At least I know I’ll fit in your truck,” he tried to joke, still a little shaken and nervy about what he’d gotten himself into. Christ. He hoped he didn’t do something to really piss Cooper off. It would totally suck if he quit and left. Christ. Don’t think about anything sucking.… Cooper watched the man for a moment and ducked his head forward finally. “You all right?” he asked worriedly. God, it had to be some shit news if Lucas was this distracted. Blinking hard, the foreman shook his head to clear it, then nodded, then shook it again as he was still thinking of… fuck. Get it together. “Yeah, yeah, I’m good,” he muttered, stuffing his other hand into its jeans pocket, looking for all the world like he expected to be scolded. “I’ll just… yeah,” he said, starting around to the passenger side. Cooper watched him worriedly and then opened the driver side door, sliding into the huge F-250 with practiced ease and pulling the door shut with a loud thunk. The lot was now empty, and Cooper guided the truck out of the gravel and through the gates. He stopped there, glancing over at Lucas and smiling as he hopped back out again. “Gate,” he muttered before jogging back to the fence behind them and dragging it shut.
12 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux Lucas watched him go like he couldn’t tear his eyes away, but then he managed it and covered his face with his hands for a long moment. “Get a hold of yourself, you ass,” he muttered to himself. “You can do this. It’s a beer. Or three. But it’s fine. It’s fine.” Behind the truck, Cooper wrapped the chain and used the key strung around his neck to lock it. He headed back to the truck and hopped in, glancing at his boss. “You doing dinner, too? Or just a beer?” he asked, trying to make small talk to cover the awkward fact that they knew so little about each other outside of those gates. “Beer. And more beer. Hooraaaaaaaay beer,” Lucas answered right away. Then he sighed. “But I better eat, too. No lunch today.” He leaned back with an annoyed grunt, finally managing to distract himself from Cooper’s hands on the steering wheel by thinking about food. Only a temporary save, he knew, but he’d take what he could get. Cooper laughed softly. “That kind of Monday, was it? I hear that,” he murmured as he flexed his sore fingers and gripped the wheel tighter. He made his way to the little bar Lucas had mentioned, pleased to find that none of his boys had headed there. A moment later he was sliding out of the truck and reaching back in for his wallet. Lucas got out of the truck and walked around the front. “Yeah. Goddamn paperwork will be the death of me. Gimme concrete. Gimme duct work. Hell, give me septic tanks. They’re all better than fuckin’ paperwork,” he complained as they walked to the door. “You know, some people hire others to do their paperwork,” Cooper advised, immediately regretting the words as he remembered that maybe there was layoff trouble brewing. He held the door for the other man, gesturing him in ahead of him with a weak smile. The foreman screwed his face up in distaste. “I hate paper pushers, Cooper. That’s why I torture myself with it. The last guy I had…” he paused to point out an open booth. “The last guy? He had to ask about every single little thing. Took twice as long as it takes me even now.” He huffed as he slid into the booth, pushing the table out some so they’d have plenty of room behind it. Cooper slid into the booth and waved and smiled at the bartender. He came here often enough that the man knew him by name, as did the
Under Contract | 13 girl who sidled up to their table to take their orders. “Usual, please,” Cooper told her with a wink before turning back to Lucas. He pushed his damp hair back out of his eyes and rolled his sore neck. “Paper pushers push papers for a reason,” he pointed out. Lucas ordered a large imported draft and asked for a menu. “What’s that reason? ’Cause they’re too puny to drive a nail?” he asked, leaning against the leather back of the booth somewhat petulantly. At least it was a great view, he told himself. “Well, yeah,” Cooper laughed as he leaned forward. “Hey,” he said in a low, nervous voice. “Is that why you wanted to talk with me? Are they cutting jobs?” he asked worriedly. “What?” Lucas just blinked at him. Cutting jobs? Cooper frowned at the confused look. “That’s not… that’s good!” he breathed in relief. “Jesus, man, you had me scared!” he laughed. Lucas tilted his head, putting two and two together. “You came when I asked because you thought I had bad news about work?” he asked a little woodenly. Cooper tilted his head, mimicking the man’s movements. “No,” he answered sincerely, a little hurt at the implication and not sure why. “No, I started worrying later when you started acting weird.” “Weird?” Lucas relaxed a little at Cooper’s quiet response, and he chanced a look up from his hands that were knotted together under the table. “Worrying? About what, the job?” he didn’t want to ask if Cooper had been worried about him. “Yeah,” Cooper nodded. “And weird. I’ve never seen you not yelling, boss. Now, you’re fidgeting,” he observed. The foreman immediately froze in place, eyes wide. Caught. Fuck. “What?” Cooper asked in alarm. “I… uh….” Lucas stuttered before biting his lip. “Sorry?” he offered awkwardly. Cooper stared at the man for a moment and then grinned in amusement. “You wanna talk about it?” he offered with a small, slightly teasing smile.
14 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux Lucas’s face fell in embarrassment, and he banged his head slowly and methodically against the back of the booth. “Could I be any more of a… a...?” He groaned, not even able to describe it. He was being a jerk. A weirdo. A lovesick fool. Thump. Thump. “That’s going to hurt if you keep doing that,” Cooper pointed out as their beers were delivered. “Sometimes it helps to tell someone you’re not, y’know, close to,” he added helpfully. Whatever was wrong with the man, obviously it was eating at him if he had wanted Cooper, of all people, to talk to. “Hell, half the crew uses me as a psychiatrist; you may as well do it, too.” Lucas sighed and told the waitress what he wanted to eat, then sat back with his beer. “I shouldn’t be talking about this,” he murmured, mostly to himself. It was a bad, bad idea. What if Cooper was offended? The man was the classic Alabama good ol’ boy. There was a rifle rack in the back of his truck, for chrissake! How the hell did it get to this point? How did he let it? It was all going to blow up in his face, and he’d be fucked, well, not really fucked – and it’d been way too long – but fucked when it came to sexual harassment and all the federal shit, and oh, God… but at least he would have said something. Cooper watched his foreman with growing concern. “They sent you my notice early, didn’t they?” he blurted. “Fuckers, they can never get their shit straight,” he grunted in disgust as he flopped back in his seat. “Notice?” Lucas’s head snapped around, and his eyes focused on Cooper. “You gave notice? You’re leaving?” If possible, he was even more stunned. Cooper blinked at the man and cleared his throat. “I… goddammit.” He shifted in his seat and huffed at himself. “It’s just, well, the general feeling is that you’re not happy with me,” he stuttered in explanation. “I just… I thought it’d be easier on you if I went to another job.” Lucas felt like he’d been punched in the stomach. “Not happy with you?” he asked faintly. Cooper was leaving him, and it was his fault? “You’re leaving me?” he asked plaintively, not realizing how it sounded. Cooper opened his mouth to respond, but found he couldn’t. He had never seen this kicked puppy look on Lucas, it somehow didn’t fit into
Under Contract | 15 Cooper’s reality. “You realize today you’ve said more to me than the grand total of the last four weeks, right?” he pointed out. “And that it took me getting myself plastered to a bucket to actually see the inside of your office? An office I’m technically supposed to be helping run?” The finality of the situation settled in, and Lucas realized that not only was it too late (if it had ever been early or even the right time), but now it was way, way too late. He’d written himself out of the running long ago by not treating the man better. He’d alienated him by pushing him away, because he was afraid Cooper would leave if he detected any hint of how Lucas felt. And now he was leaving anyway. Lucas had done it to himself again. He opened his mouth to apologize, but instead something totally different and unplanned popped out. “I’m in love with you.” Cooper sat stunned for a moment, blinking stupidly. He stared at the man across the table and narrowed his eyes, looking around the bar suspiciously. “Did they put you up to this?” he finally asked with a wave of his beer bottle at Lucas. “Some sort of hazing for yelling all day and then getting stuck in a bucket?” Lucas’s eyes fell shut, and he slowly leaned forward and buried his head in his arms. Maybe Cooper would just leave him here, think he was totally crazy, and be glad he was getting off the site. Leaving. He’s leaving. Lucas ached inside. He wished he’d said something earlier. Cooper’s slight grin fell as he watched, and a slow cold crept over him as he realized the man might be serious. “You’re… you’re serious,” he blurted in shock. “But… you don’t even know me!” he protested. Not moving his head, Lucas raised both hands and shrugged, dropping them back to the table with an embarrassed groan. “You can go,” he said, his voice muffled. “Really. Don’t worry about me.” Cooper huffed at the man. “I clocked out,” he said suddenly. “Means I don’t have do what you tell me now,” he said pointedly as he tilted his bottle back and gulped down the rest of his beer. He raised his hand for two more before he plunked the glass down on the table between them to grab Lucas’s attention. “You’re serious?” he demanded again, wanting to make damn certain this wasn’t some sort of elaborate prank.
16 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux Lucas sat up straight, eyes averted to the ceiling. “Christ. Yeah, fine, so, I’m serious. Just do your laughing and go. I won’t bug you while you finish out your hitch,” he said, trying very hard not to let the embarrassment that was turning into hurt show. “I’m not laughing,” Cooper responded calmly, watching Lucas’s face carefully. Sea-blue, apprehensive eyes turned toward Cooper. Not laughing, sure. Probably so he could get angry enough to beat the shit out of his foreman – who wouldn’t put up a fight, by the way. Lucas suddenly wished he could turn off the internal commentary reel. He’d rather hear a laugh track. “You ever heard the boys talk about my girlfriend?” Cooper asked conversationally. He didn’t wait for an answer, doubting Lucas had heard much gossip from the crew. That was Cooper’s job, after all, to filter out the nonsense before it got to the foreman. “They all think I’m pretty serious about her. You know why?” Lucas had indeed heard about Cooper’s girlfriend. It was a popular topic of gossip among the guys. He slowly shook his head. He had no idea whether Cooper was ‘pretty serious’ about his girlfriend. He’d only ever been concerned with trying to decide if he thought Cooper could ever be ‘pretty serious’ about him. “I’m gay, Ted,” Cooper admitted calmly. The name sounded odd on his tongue, and the admission made his stomach curl in a fascinating manner. “Making them think I have a serious girlfriend keeps them from setting me up with their sisters or some shit. Keeps them from asking awkward questions.” He trailed off and tilted his head slightly, waiting for a reaction. Lucas’s face was blank for a long moment as all the details swirled in his brain, a huge, confusing mish mash of information that he finally plucked a thought out of. “They try to set you up with their sisters? That sucks,” he declared in a much more normal tone of voice. Relieved, Cooper laughed softly and glanced down at the new bottle of beer that was set in front of him. He looked back up at the foreman and laughed again as the puppy dog face made a reappearance.
Under Contract | 17 At least now he didn’t look as if he’d been kicked. “Apparently I’d make a desirable brother-in-law,” he joked, smirking and licking his lips. His eyes fixed on Cooper’s lips, Lucas’s face grew serious, and somehow, his voice came out quiet, calm and even. “You’re a desirable man.” Cooper’s smile faded into something slightly more serious, and he felt a tinge of warmth touch his cheeks. He looked down again and cleared his throat, shifting in his seat as he plucked at the label on his bottle. “So all this time you’ve been basically having nothing to do with me,” he said slowly, looking up at the other man from under lowered brows. “It’s been because you thought you were in love with me?” Lucas watched Cooper’s body shift, watched his hand curl about the bottle, watched his fingers scrape on the paper, watched his full lips move. “Yeah,” he answered quietly, figuring the worst was out now, how could anything else be more embarrassing? “Can’t tell you how relieved that makes me,” Cooper murmured quietly without looking up. “I knew I was good at my job. I just couldn’t figure out what you had against me,” he said thoughtfully as he looked up at Lucas again. “Could be lust, you know,” he added. It was on the tip of Lucas’s tongue to reassure Cooper about how good he really was at his job. But the sudden suggestion threw him, and he just blinked at him for a moment. He slowly shook his head. Nope. He’d already thought about that. And he’d tested it. Thoroughly. With both hands, even. Yeah, lust was part of it. But after months of fantasies, the yearning had just gotten sharper. More longing. More poignant. He dropped his eyes back to the table. “We could find out,” Cooper murmured, his exterior calm and composed just as he usually was, but inside the butterflies were migrating. Lucas’s voice was solemn and steady as he raised his eyes to meet Cooper’s. “You deserve a hell of a lot more than a casual fuck,” he said. It was clear he very much believed it. “You’re worth more than that.” Cooper raised an eyebrow and smirked. “Now you’re implying you would be casual? What happened to the declaration of love?”
18 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux Eyes getting big and round again, Lucas backpedaled. “I didn’t lie… I’m not saying....” He settled for looking at Cooper dejectedly. “I know it’s crazy,” he murmured. “But I believe it. That I’m in love with you.” He shook his head. “Look, Cooper, thanks. For listening, I mean. Really. But I don’t want you thinking I’m just trying to get into your pants. So….” He knew he should tell him to forget about it, but he just couldn’t get the words out. He’d worked with Cooper for six months on this project. He’d started pining after the first one. The longing he’d built up wasn’t going away anytime soon. But Cooper would, apparently. Lucas drooped physically and emotionally. Cooper watched the play of emotions, not sure whether to be amused or feel sorry for the guy. “So what did you want from this?” he asked. “Did you just want to tell me and get it off your chest? Or were you hoping for more?” he asked hesitantly. “Because you sort of just turned down more,” he pointed out gently. Lucas looked up and gazed at him, taking in his features, a face he could describe perfectly from memory. “I want… to wake up in the morning curled up around you. To watch you make coffee for us that you pour into the Thermoses because I always spill it. To sit on a site with you and eat lunch, just talking about the weather. To watch you work and know you’re mine. To see a look in your eyes that tells me I’m yours. To go home in the evening and know you’ll be there. To go to sleep with you in my arms.” Then he blinked, surprised at all the words that had poured out. “I didn’t think you’d listen or take me seriously if I said anything.” Cooper listened to the man – really listened to him. A look that was part amusement and part confusion slowly formed on his handsome features as he watched his boss become a man he had never suspected was under that exterior. “Wow,” he murmured when Lucas had finished. “I think you might actually be right,” he said softly. “You’ve got it pretty bad, huh?” he observed as he leaned forward in his seat. “So, if you want so much, why are you already dismissing it as impossible?” he asked quietly. “I –” Lucas stopped his first response, not sure what was coming out anyway, and thought about what he wanted to say. “I guess I figured you were just humoring me,” he said awkwardly. “I sure understand why. Your boss coming out with this crazy declaration of love, and all.”
Under Contract | 19 “Like I said, I’ve clocked out,” Cooper murmured, more serious this time. “You’re not my boss right now. You’re just some guy in a bar who’s making me think about fixing coffee in the morning.” The breath caught in Lucas’s chest, which echoed with a pang of… longing? Excitement? He couldn’t describe it. But Cooper’s words made him feel it. “Is that a good thing?” he asked tentatively. “Depends,” Cooper answered with a small smile. “I prefer orange juice.” Lucas smiled, a cautious hope flaring in his eyes. “I can do juice,” he said, voice shaking a little. Cooper grinned widely at him, shifting forward in his seat again and leaning closer over the table. “I also require the left side of the bed,” he told Lucas conspiratorially. Lips twitching, Lucas smiled a little more. “Well, now, that you’ll have to negotiate for,” he said, feeling the weight lift off his chest. Cooper had listened. He’d taken him seriously. And he was actually… actually… open to the idea. A little kernel of happiness started hopping in his chest like popping corn. “Drive a hard bargain, do you?” Cooper drawled calculatingly as he leaned back and studied the man. “How hungry are you?” he asked abruptly. Blinking in surprise, Lucas shrugged. “Why?” “I was thinking it would be sort of fun to show you the advantages of the right side of the bed,” Cooper answered thoughtfully, one eyebrow raised mischievously. Lucas searched Cooper’s face for a moment, then fumbled in his back pocket for his wallet while trying to slide out of the booth. Cooper grinned widely, rising smoothly to his feet. “Hey, Katie!” he called to the waitress. “Put it on my tab, yeah?” he requested as he discreetly put his hand at Lucas’s lower back and began pushing him toward the door. The warmth of Cooper’s fingers at the base of his spine was enough to keep Lucas’s voice gone until they were outside and back at the truck. He stopped at the door, looking back at the other man.
20 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux Cooper glanced over at Lucas when he stopped moving and raised his eyebrows questioningly. “What’s wrong?” he asked with a small smile. Lucas grinned for the first time that night, a wide, happy smile as he shook his head and climbed into the truck. “Let’s go,” he said.
IT was dark, and Lucas had an easy time keeping the mood as he and Cooper chatted amiably about work. He kicked back in the truck, glad he could stretch his legs out. “Then what the hell do you think I should do about Sanders? The next time he passes out it might be into a flat of wet concrete or off the side of a building or something.” Cooper couldn’t stop the chuckle the mental images caused, and he glanced over at the other man apologetically as they came to a red light. “Keep him on the ground?” he suggested in an optimistic tone. Snorting, Lucas leaned his head against the seat and shook his head, looking back toward Cooper, grin firmly in place. “We can only try. That man has a willful streak that’s totally at odds with his nonexistent nerves.” “I can keep him at work with something a little less… shocking,” Cooper drawled with a barely restrained snort. “Some of the other boys are tired of dragging him out of the buildings when he splats, so they’d be willing to help,” Cooper offered, not entirely sure that he could actually pull it off, but willing to try, at least. Whatever was wrong with Sanders, Cooper was pretty sure it had to do with playing with stripped wires when he was little. Lucas chuckled. “Good luck with that,” he said, voice clearly doubtful. “But if anyone can do it, you can. You’ve got the better people skills of the two of us.” “That’s not really saying much, boss,” Cooper snickered, the habit of mocking his foreman a hard one to break. Just going with the flow, Lucas stuck his tongue out at the other man in retaliation. “Oh, you’re asking for a plaster finger in your mouth,” Cooper warned as he glanced over, taking his eyes off the road only momentarily.
Under Contract | 21 Lucas snickered. “Plaster finger, huh? Your hands good enough to catch me?” he teased before sticking his tongue out again, eyes flashing. Cooper waved his fingers at the man. They were no longer covered with plaster, of course, but they were covered with everything they had used to get the stuff off. “On second thought, that might be pretty toxic,” he muttered, snickering slightly as he turned onto the gravel road that would eventually lead to his house. “Uh, yeah,” Lucas said, screwing up his nose just thinking about the chemicals. He glanced outside, seeing the heavy woods. “Hell, Cooper, where are you taking me? Out to the middle of nowhere to dump the body? Bucking for a promotion?” he asked, sliding his eyes to the side to see if the other man got that he was teasing. “I need your job like I need a hole in my head,” Cooper scoffed with a smile. “If you roll your window down you can hear the banjos playing,” he teased back. “I like it out here. Not many neighbors.” “Sure I won’t hear strains of Deliverance?” Lucas jibed. “Bedtime music,” Cooper answered in a defensive voice, grinning in the darkness. Lucas shook his head and snickered. “You’re really something, you know that?” he said in a softer tone, reminiscent of his tone back in the bar when he’d admitted his feelings. Cooper glanced over at the man as the truck slowed. He smiled slightly, struck speechless briefly and not even certain of what he could say in response. He slowed the truck to a stop in the middle of the gravel road and nodded at the distant porch light off to the right. “Last chance to blame it on the beer goggles,” he offered seriously. Lucas didn’t even look away from Cooper, his eyes locked on the face he’d dreamed about. Slowly, he shook his head. He wasn’t going anywhere. Cooper watched the man for a brief second, still feeling a bit surreal about the whole thing. Had he really invited his boss back to his house to possibly… do… unbosslike things? Yeah. Yes, he had, and he couldn’t blame it on one bottle of beer. Maybe if it went wrong he could blame it on the chemicals from earlier? Yeah. Good plan. He nodded
22 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux and turned the truck into his driveway, navigating the winding, graveled expanse slowly. The porch light revealed a piece of his sprawling brick ranch, and as Cooper shut off the truck a dog could be heard barking and yipping excitedly somewhere close. The sudden silence as the truck ticked and cooled filled the cab like a fog, and Cooper glanced over at his foreman silently. Lucas licked his lips nervously, looking over at the porch light, then turning his eyes toward Cooper. He could feel the tension in the air and suddenly he was nervous again, just as nervous as he’d been sitting across the table from him, beer in hand. “Uh… so.” He swallowed hard and looked around. “Care to come in for a beer, boss?” Cooper asked softly, hoping to ease some of the tension that was building around them and in his chest. “Yeah,” Lucas breathed in quiet relief. “I’d like that.” Cooper popped open the door and slid out of the truck as soon as Lucas answered. He tugged his jacket with him and closed the door on the interior light. For some reason the glow of that light was just too much to face with what he hoped would happen. He jangled his keys noisily and headed for the front door, wondering if he’d do any better with the lights inside. Lucas climbed out and followed Cooper, shoving his hands in his pockets as he climbed up the stairs to the long wooden porch. He glanced over it in the dim light – it looked handmade. “You build this porch?” he asked on impulse. “Yep,” Cooper answered as he unlocked the door, moving slowly as if to give the other man a chance to bolt. “This past summer. Every inch of it done with at least one beer in the twilight after work,” he laughed. Running his hand over the railing, Lucas smiled. “It’s great work,” he complimented, then he glanced over at Cooper with a small frown. “We worked late a lot. What kind of sleep did you get?” “Thanks,” Cooper murmured softly as he pushed open the door and turned to watch Lucas in the soft light. “I got enough,” he answered,
Under Contract | 23 snorting and crossing his arms. “Sometimes it was just one board put into place and nailed and then I’d go to bed. Sometimes I got a little carried away, and I’d look up finally and see the sunrise. Those weren’t stellar days, usually,” he admitted sheepishly. “Like today.” Lucas looked up from the woodwork, frowning a little. “Why didn’t you say something? You could’ve come in late or stole a nap or something,” he said. “That would have been unacceptable,” Cooper countered with a serious shake of his head. “And it’s not like this was a priority job,” he added as he stepped forward and ran his hand lovingly over the smooth wood. The move brought him to Lucas’s side, and he leaned against the railing and glanced to the side to peer up at the man. “I like to build,” he insisted. “The harder the day at work, the more I want to come home and do this.” “You have a lot of harder days,” Lucas pointed out quietly. “I know your boss,” he added, lips twitching a bit. “Real bastard, that one,” Cooper agreed as he stood back up and turned to hitch his hip onto the railing. Lucas’s brows flew up, and he opened his mouth to retort, but he caught himself and bit his lower lip. “Real bastard, huh?” he repeated, a little shaky. He had hoped, maybe, that Cooper would see past that. Cooper smiled slightly and reached out to slide his fingers through one of Lucas’s belt loops. His stomach fluttered nervously at the gesture. Christ, was he really making a move on his foreman? He already pretty much knew how it would turn out, right? “Everyone respects you,” Cooper told the man quietly, pushing away his inner nerves in favor of concentrating on the man in front of him. Lucas really was incredibly built. And he looked so stricken for some reason, Cooper just wanted to soothe him. “They fear you. But they like you anyway.” The tension in Lucas’s shoulders drained away, and he looked up to meet Cooper’s changeable green eyes. “You, too, I hope,” he murmured. He carefully moved one hand to slide it over Cooper’s fingers tentatively. Cooper smirked and gave Lucas’s belt loop a sharp tug toward him. “I wouldn’t cover for you being a bastard if I didn’t like you,” he
24 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux teased as he slid one foot behind the crook of his other knee and sat half on the railing. Lucas shuffled over good-naturedly, stopping just short of touching. He raised one arm to brace it against the joist. “Cover for me, huh?” he said with a teasing smile. “And how often does that go on?” he asked. He could feel the steady pull of the weight of Cooper’s fingers on his belt loop, and he could feel his pulse picking up the closer he got to Cooper. “Every damn day,” Cooper drawled with a sad shake of his head. He huffed and smiled as he looked up at the other man, glad for the fact that Lucas’s face was shadowed from the light. He didn’t think he’d have the nerve to touch him at all if he could see him, see that this was his fucking boss... Lucas, however, could see most of Cooper’s face, and his reply stuck in his throat as he glanced over the rugged looks that had struck him the first time they’d met. “Ah, must make for a lot of beer, then,” he murmured. “A lot of deck,” Cooper corrected softly. “How much of how you treated me was because of tonight?” he asked, no longer able to restrain himself. Not sure how to answer that, Lucas pressed his lips together as his eyes dropped back to the railing. “A lot,” he admitted. “Most all of it. Especially after I figured out you could handle your responsibilities and more. I knew you’d get the job done and done right.” He paused. “Despite me,” he added, more quietly. “I’m sorry for that,” Cooper murmured, letting his eyes drift down Lucas’s body slowly. Finally he gave another little tug and looked back up at the shadowed face. “We could make an impressive team, boss,” he said in a hushed whisper. The tug moved Lucas’s hip to where it brushed the inside of Cooper’s knee. He blinked and looked up at him. “I’ve thought that for a long time,” he murmured. “Ya big idiot, thinking it and not saying it.” Cooper laughed softly as the dog howled miserably somewhere in the background. He stood slowly, his hold on Lucas’s belt loop keeping him from being able to back
Under Contract | 25 away. There was only an inch or two difference in their height, but as Cooper closed the distance between their bodies and put them in closer proximity to one another than they’d ever been, he was struck by that fact that he had to tilt his head back slightly to meet the man’s eyes. He wasn’t used to looking up at anyone. He licked his lips nervously, not quite able to force himself to make the first move. Lucas bit his lip again as he silently agreed with Cooper, but then he was distracted as the other man moved, slowly standing, their chests barely a breath away from rubbing together. Temptation and want swamped him, and he turned his chin and met eyes that glittered in the low light and full, dark lips only inches away. When Cooper’s tongue darted out, Lucas practically squeaked as he gasped for his next breath. “I… Cooper… I….” Lucas’s hand clenched in and out of a fist at his side as his other hand, still propped above him on the support, shifted so his palm gripped the wood. Cooper raised an eyebrow and tilted his head to the side slightly, wondering if Lucas actually had any more first moves in him. He’d taken a pretty damn large first step with the whole ‘I love you’ thing, after all. Cooper’s lips twitched into a crooked smile, and his chest fluttered pleasantly as he leaned slightly into the man and brushed his lips over Lucas’s. Absolute relief warred with surprise and pleasure inside Lucas as he felt the feather-like touch, and after a few moments of shock he sighed shakily and met Cooper’s eyes once the other man pulled back. Lucas raised his hand to lightly touch those sinful, inviting lips, his fingertips skimming them, his eyes riveted. “Okay?” Cooper asked tentatively, his lips twitching in amusement as his mouth was fondled. Lucas gave his answer by gently tipping Cooper’s chin up so he could kiss him. He pressed his lips to Cooper’s and added just a bit of pressure. His heart was racing, and he knew his hand was shaking as he slid his fingers along the line of Cooper’s jaw. There was absolutely no way for him to catch his breath. Cooper’s lips parted automatically, and he snaked his hands onto Lucas’s hips as he stepped that last inch closer. His breath left him as
26 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux their bodies pressed together and their lips met languidly over and over. Finally, he was forced to gasp for air, but still it didn’t seem to help. He was fucking nervous and excited, and it all still felt a bit bizarre. When Lucas opened his eyes after their lips parted, he had to drag in a deep breath as well, but he didn’t look away. The heat of Cooper’s body was soaking into him, and he wanted so very much to curl his arms around the other man and hold him even closer. “Wow,” he breathed, licking at the slight damp on his bottom lip. He was seized with the desire to lean and lick Cooper’s bottom lip as well and just barely held himself back. “Yeah,” Cooper grinned a little a goofily and gave Lucas’s hips a gentle tug that pressed them together even closer. “Inside?” he asked with a nod at the still open front door. Lucas chuckled and shifted, setting his hands lightly at Cooper’s waist. “Yeah,” he agreed, stepping in that direction, but Cooper’s fingers still curled through his belt loop stopped him. Cooper reached up and wrapped his arms around Lucas’s neck impulsively, having to rise onto his toes in order to steal another kiss, this one more passionate. He growled a little in pleasure, really liking the fact that Lucas could match him toe to toe, and he pulled the man back against him and deepened the kiss. Lucas was surprised, but he certainly went with it, sliding his arms around Cooper and holding him – just like he’d wanted to for so long – and joined the kiss with enthusiasm. He parted his lips and even licked that all-too-tempting lower lip before Cooper’s tongue teased him into more. He heard the other man’s soft growl, and it threatened to turn his knees to mush. Lucas had to spread his stance to keep his balance, and Cooper let his fingers slide into the man’s unruly curls. He growled again. He had never acknowledged an attraction to Ted Lucas, other than the obvious first impression that the man was handsome and impressively built. He was simply the Boss – a cranky one – and so Cooper had only seen him as such. After Lucas’s admission at the bar, though, Cooper’s mind had begun to try and reconcile the new image of Lucas as a man and not a bossman. He likely wouldn’t have admitted it even to himself, but he had invited Lucas back here with the intention of letting Lucas sleep with him
Under Contract | 27 just to get what Cooper thought was a crush out of his system. It certainly wasn’t a sacrifice on his part. Now, though, with strong arms wrapped tightly around him and the intoxicating combination of new tastes and smells and the pleasurable fumbling where they each learned how the other liked to kiss, Cooper was all too aware that he wanted the man. “Inside,” he growled again, a low sound that rumbled through them both. He began slow dancing the other man closer to the door, unwilling to loosen his grip. Lucas practically purred his agreement as he walked backward, letting Cooper guide them. He sure as hell wasn’t letting go to look, not when his wildest and craziest dreams were coming true. He had the devastatingly handsome and drop-dead sexy Nick Cooper actually in his arms, pressed close against his body. Lucas fancied he could feel the other man’s heart racing just like his own, and he dipped his head for another kiss as if he wouldn’t be able to take another breath without one. They missed the door on the first attempt, and Cooper ended up slamming Lucas into the wall instead. That suited him pretty well for a few moments, during which he pressed the bigger man against the brick of his house and let his hands roam down his body as he continued to kiss him. When he let his fingers drift back up they found their way under Lucas’s T-shirt. Cooper’s breath left him once again as he found warm skin, and he finally broke off the heated kiss and pulled back just enough to see Lucas’s face. Lucas hadn’t even flinched when his back hit the bricks; he was too busy basking in the feel of Cooper’s hands skimming over him, and he took the opportunity to do the same, tracing muscles and sliding his fingers under Cooper’s collar almost as if it were forbidden territory. He was sinking in the heat of their bodies, and if he had a choice, he’d drown in it right now. When Cooper pulled away from the kiss, the low moan that had been muffled by their lips spilled free, and Lucas arched up against Cooper’s hand. His eyes, half-shut, were glazed with want. Cooper growled again when he saw that glaze. “Do you have any objections to skipping the tour of the house or any other pleasantries in favor of my dragging you to my bed?” Cooper asked in a low, whispered voice, his tone almost formal with his inquiry. One hand came up to let his callused fingertips ghost across Lucas’s
28 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux cheek, and his slid his other hand around the man and up to the small of his back to hold him closer. First, Lucas turned his chin and laid a light kiss against those fingertips, then he answered, and his voice was a low rasp. “No objections as long as you keep kissing me,” he said, his own hands sliding down Cooper’s back slowly to stop just below his belt. Then he spread his fingers and kept going, until he covered most of that gorgeous ass, and he squeezed as he pulled Cooper against him. His breath kept catching as their groins bumped and rubbed. “Get to dragging,” he ordered raggedly. Cooper backed away suddenly and grabbed Lucas’s hand, tugging him away from the side of the house and yanking him into the foyer. Lucas managed to push the door closed behind them, and Nick dragged him further into the house, through an arched doorway, into a long, wide hallway. He pointed to the left, where a large space opened up into a kitchen on one side and an open living area on the other. On the other side an open doorway was covered with a thick piece of plastic, and behind the fluttering opaque material was the skeleton of a room. “Kitchen and living room,” Cooper grunted as he turned to the right. He prowled down the hall, pointing at doorways as he went. “Bathroom. Bedroom. Bedroom,” he huffed with each gesture, not even slowing. He led Lucas to the French doors at the end of the hallway and pushed through them into a large master bedroom. The ceilings were vaulted and a bay window opened up to the back yard. “Bathroom,” he huffed with a wave at a door on the near wall. The understated decor and the oil paintings on the walls didn’t seem to match the rugged, good ol’ boy image most people had of Nick Cooper. Most people probably thought he slept on a plank and ate nails in his cereal for breakfast. Cooper pulled Lucas close once more as they wandered into the bedroom, and he kissed him, crowding him toward the king-sized bed in the center of the far wall. “Bed,” he growled, ending his tour of the house. Lucas couldn’t help but chuckle and smile against Cooper’s lips. Indicating his amusement, he nipped at the hot tongue that slid into his mouth, reveling in the groan it won him. He pulled back to breathe and glanced to the bed. “Oh yeah. Bed,” he agreed before sliding his hands to the hem of the very worn and soft flannel shirt that covered Cooper’s chest. “Wanna feel your skin,” he rasped before stealing another kiss.
Under Contract | 29 Now that he was here, he was going to enjoy it to the hilt. There was no guarantee it would happen again – and he wanted to store up every second. Cooper raised his hands high to let Lucas pull the shirt off instead of taking the time to unbutton it. He reached for Lucas’s T-shirt and tugged demandingly, his mind trying desperately to remember if he actually had condoms and lubricant handy… were the sheets even clean? A flutter of nervous doubt accosted him. What were they thinking, falling into bed like this? He hesitated only briefly, and then he pushed it aside. He wasn’t going to let silly little things like common sense or logic ruin what was proving to be an interesting night. Throwing Cooper’s shirt to the side once it was over his head, Lucas pulled his own T-shirt off and dropped it to their feet. His hands went straight to the skin in front of him, fingers spreading to soak in the warmth and feel the play of muscles under his hands. “Gorgeous,” he murmured. Dipping his head, he could smell the other man’s scent; it was warm and masculine, sweat and dirt and a hint of clean cotton, an incredible turn on. “Hush, you,” Cooper teased as he grabbed the other man’s face and kissed him again, pressing into him and pushing him back against the bed. When the backs of Lucas’s knees hit the bed he grunted and fell backwards – but he was determined not to let go. He pulled Cooper down on top of him, grunting again as the other man’s weight settled hard on him. Cooper huffed as he landed and pushed up slightly, looking down at the man now pinned under him. He gave Lucas’s jeans a yank and unconsciously licked his lips, his brow furrowed in concentration as his fingers fumbled with the buttons. Lucas panted as his eyes threatened to roll back in his head. But he wanted to watch. Taking advantage of proximity, he used the time to slide his hands over Cooper’s shoulders, back, arms, and sides as the other man pulled at his button fly. It was going to be rough going – Lucas was so hard that there was barely any give left in the denim. Cooper growled as his fingers finally remembered how to work, and he lunged to kiss the man again as he freed him.
30 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux “Which do you prefer?” Cooper asked him in a low, rumbling voice. A soft whimper escaped Lucas’s lips. “Fuck. I won’t last. Fuck me,” he said hoarsely, hands reaching to clasp Cooper’s face and pull him down for a desperate kiss. Cooper shivered involuntarily, finally giving in to the urge and rocking his hips against the man beneath him. “Yes, sir,” he growled cheekily as he pushed up and off Lucas finally. “Be right back,” he rumbled as he headed for the bathroom. As he lay there, Lucas raised both hands to scrub at his face. He was about ready to jump out of his skin he was so turned on, and Cooper’s crass comments were just fuel for the fire. He dropped his hand to push at the denim still pinching about his groin and groaned. “Fuck,” he muttered. “Hope I don’t embarrass myself,” he murmured, looking up at the exposed wood beams in the ceiling. “What was that?” Cooper called from the bathroom as he hurriedly washed the chemicals off his hands and arms. Lucas’s whimper was louder this time. “I said I hope I don’t embarrass myself,” he answered wryly, pitching his voice so Cooper could hear. Cooper responded with a shout of triumph as he rummaged through the drawers and came across the needed supplies, and he prowled back out into the room to look over Lucas with a leer. “Talking to the man with his hands stuck in the bucket, remember?” he purred as he walked closer and used his free hand to unsnap his own jeans. Lucas flushed with heat as he watched Cooper saunter over, those green eyes obviously dragging over him, because Lucas could feel the heat of his gaze. “I can think of somewhere better for you to stick your hands,” he rasped, sliding his own hands over his belly and down into the open V of his jeans. Now that he was here, he knew he sounded like an absolute slut. But he couldn’t help it. He didn’t want to help it. He wanted to say or do whatever he had to in order to keep Cooper’s attention. A visible thrill ran through Cooper as he watched, and he stepped closer and tossed the lubricant and condom onto the bed as he reached down and grabbed Lucas’s jeans. He tugged at them, more gently than he
Under Contract | 31 wanted to, but if he let himself go he might actually hurt one of them. His body throbbed as he bent to kiss at Lucas’s hip and pulled the jeans down further. Lucas’s hands flew to Cooper’s shoulders when the other man leaned over, and he bit his lip when he felt soft lips on his sensitive skin. The jeans were being pulled down his admittedly long legs, leaving only the soft white boxer briefs that fit snugly even without him having a raging hard on. Lucas wiggled as he felt Cooper’s breath hot through the cotton against his hip. The jeans were soon taken care of and unceremoniously tossed aside. Cooper’s fingers curled under the elastic of the cotton briefs and he began to tug slowly at them. Going slowly was literally painful now, but Cooper needed to. He needed to savor this thing that he hadn’t even realized he wanted. He kissed the skin he revealed as he went. Visibly trembling, Lucas’s breath caught as Cooper peeled the briefs down, and the shock of cool air on his cock caused him to gasp and moan. His hands gripped in the quilt on the bed as he prayed Cooper would be happy with what he was uncovering. Cooper kissed along the soft skin slowly, hoping that the other man couldn’t feel the trembling of his fingers as he touched him. He looked up at him finally and licked his lips slowly, waiting for some sort of permission to continue. Lucas was biting his lower lip, his eyes wide and dilated. “Don’t stop,” he begged. Cooper couldn’t even grin. He was far too turned on now to bother with things like grinning. He bent his head and licked gently at the head of Lucas’s cock as his hands slid across Lucas’s skin. He was regretting not removing his own jeans at this point… he would have to move soon to get rid of them, and he really didn’t want to move right now. Lucas’s exhale was mixed with a soft wail, and he clutched at Cooper’s shoulders. “Fuck fuck fuck fuck...” he chanted as his hips lifted toward that hot mouth without his even instructing them to. “Want you so bad,” he said raggedly. The words shot through Cooper’s body, and he hummed as Lucas’s hips thrust up toward his mouth. He gripped the man’s hips and held them down, his fingers digging into the skin as he did so. He groaned
32 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux as desire rippled through him, and he swirled his tongue and growled deep in his throat. “Cooper, fuck...” Lucas gasped as his gut clenched. “I told you I won’t last,” he practically mewled, but he didn’t try to stop his abbreviated thrusts between Cooper’s lips. He was dizzy with arousal and disbelief – after dreaming for so long.... Cooper hummed once more before lifting his head. He shook slightly, his heart pounding and his breath coming in short pants. He took a moment to examine the situation. It was still surreal and likely would remain so as he met Lucas’s blue eyes. Cooper pushed up slowly, rolling his shoulders as he crawled backward and stood. He bit his lip as he pushed his jeans down, his eyes not leaving the other man’s. So many things were racing through his mind to say, but he just couldn’t form any of them. Instead he grinned slowly and stepped out of his jeans and briefs, then crawled back onto the bed and kissed the other man demandingly. Lucas growled into Cooper’s kiss as their cocks rubbed together, and he couldn’t help but grasp Cooper’s lean ass with both hands and hold on tight. He was thinking this meant Cooper approved of what he saw, or at least didn’t mind. Of course, since he was doing the fucking, he might not care. Lucas’s thoughts ran in heated circles as Cooper’s tongue plundered his mouth. Oh God. He was going to come – right on the spot, Cooper rubbing and jerking against him. Lucas’s body tensed as he tried to hold back. Cooper’s hand slid down Lucas’s side as he used his other arm to prop himself up, his fingers dragging down hard, tense muscles and warm skin. He tugged at the back of Lucas’s thigh and insinuated his body between the man’s legs. “You feel so good,” he managed to breathe against Lucas’s lips, his hips jerking involuntarily. “This might be a… short… God,” he gasped brokenly as their bodies rubbed together. The tension and desperation in Cooper’s voice snapped Lucas’s resolve, and he threw his head back and yelled as he jerked against a hard thigh, his come slicking their skin and easing the slide as he continued to grind up against him. He shook through his shockingly strong orgasm and gripped Cooper to him tightly. “Fuuuck...” he drew out as he spasmed, each splash of come draining him even more.
Under Contract | 33 Cooper groaned and slid his hand under Lucas’s hips, lifting him off the bed and letting him thrust his hips up as he emptied himself. He continued to kiss him almost brutally, rocking his hips with the increasingly easy slide of their bodies. “Fuck,” he echoed in a hushed, distracted voice as he tried not to join him in coming. He propped himself on his elbow and reached desperately for the little tube of lubricant. His fingers found the condom instead, and he pulled it closer, biting the corner and ripping it open with a yank of his head to the side. Gasping for breath, Lucas could only hang onto the other man as aftershocks ripped through him. He couldn’t remember the last time he came so hard. The rip of plastic caught his attention, and he opened his eyes to see Cooper rolling a condom onto his sizable cock. Lucas moaned again as he twitched and shivered. Cooper’s entire body quaked with anticipation as he reached for the tube again. His other hand slid through the come on his own hip and smeared it onto his cock slowly, shuddering at his own touch. “Okay?’’ he gasped as he leaned down and practically vibrated as he hovered over Lucas’s body. “Fuck yeah,” Lucas rasped, reopening his eyes to see the hunger and desire written plainly on Cooper’s face. “You want me, I’m yours.” He pulled up both legs and propped his knees in the air. “How long’s it been?” Cooper asked distractedly, his thumb flicking the cap of the lubricant open. Lucas blinked several times. “Few years,” he murmured, putting one arm behind his head, the other on the bed alongside his hip. He was drinking in the sight of Cooper kneeling between his legs. Cooper growled in desire and frustration. He wasn’t willing to hurt the other man, and so he smeared a streak of lubricant along the juncture of his hips and then tossed the tube aside. He swiped his fingers through the smear and reached between Lucas’s knees. “Enjoy this, ’cause once I’m inside you it’ll be a quick ride,” he growled, not meaning to sound crass but not caring that he did. Head tilted back, Lucas arched his back as long fingers squeezed into him, and he grunted in approval, lifting his hips to encourage him.
34 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux “Cooper, there’s nothing I want more right now than you fucking me wild,” he rasped. Cooper practically whimpered at the thought, and he twisted his fingers a little less gently than he should have, trying to hurry the process. After a few agonizingly long moments he pressed his body down and growled, “I don’t want to hurt you. If I do, you tell me,” he added as he pulled his fingers out and gripped himself tightly in order to guide himself. “I’ll tell you, I promise,” Lucas agreed, spreading his knees farther and trying to stay relaxed. Cooper waited a very brief moment to try and calm himself, but there was no doing that. His body thrummed with the need to be sheathed. He pushed the head of his cock against the resistant muscles, groaning softly. Forcing his eyes to remain open, he watched Lucas as he thrust his hips forward and entered the man in a torturously slow push. Another groan was ripped from his throat, and his body trembled as he rocked gently. God, he needed more! Lucas shuddered against the burning stretch, but his hands scrabbled at Cooper’s arms. “I’m not a goddamn china doll, Cooper, fuck me!” he urged, snapping his hips up, trying to get more of that thick cock inside him. Cooper gasped and panted softly, moaning as Lucas’s hips moved. There was the tone he recognized from the job. Though the words made it a slightly different experience…. “Hold the fuck still unless you want this over right now,” he growled. To accentuate his point he pushed deep into the man and kissed him hungrily. Pleasure exploded in his groin, and he knew that all attempts at going slowly had just been shot all to hell. He began to thrust in an uninhibited, erratic rhythm as his free hand lifted Lucas’s hips to meet his movements. He was no longer worried about shared pleasure or even about impressing his new lover with any sort of skill. He was now simply fucking with a very specific, very close goal in mind. An unfettered howl loosed from Lucas’s throat as Cooper let go – it was just the wild ride he’d dreamed about. Felt so damn good he could feel himself getting hard again, but he didn’t plan to do anything about it anytime soon. He was just soaking in the feel of being well-fucked by the man he’d fallen head over heels for as Cooper’s mouth ravaged his.
Under Contract | 35 It didn’t take long. Cooper had known it wouldn’t. The excitement and anticipation and the heady scents of sex and sweat and fine dirt and glove leather and a new man under him, coupled with the sheer warmth and tightness into which his hips thrust were just too much to handle all at once. Cooper broke the kiss and buried his face against Lucas’s neck, panting with each hard thrust of his hips that brought his orgasm closer. He called the other man’s name plaintively as the rush of pleasure exploded, panting it over and over against sweaty skin as he came. Lucas curled his legs over the backs of Cooper’s thighs as the man shook in his arms. He gasped and shivered himself as he heard his given name rasped over and over in that drop-dead sexy voice. Groaning, he wrapped his arms around Cooper as well once he collapsed to his chest. Lucas closed his eyes and said a quick prayer of thanks. Lord God above, he was supremely grateful. His heart was pounding, and he felt swamped by a wave of possessiveness as Cooper didn’t try to pull away.
COOPER lay gasping where he had flopped on the man under him. Finally, after his body recovered from the shock of such intense pleasure, he turned his head to the side and kissed the patch of skin under his lips. When he pushed up, the sweat on his body made the parting slightly sticky, and Cooper huffed and bent his head to kiss Lucas lightly before he slowly pulled out of him. He couldn’t help but groan plaintively at the added stimulation, but he lived through it and stood slowly. Without a word he headed for the bathroom to dispose of the condom and retrieve a towel for them both. It wasn’t exactly a romantic gesture, but he figured it would be more appreciated than a rose or something. Reluctantly releasing him when he moved, Lucas watched Cooper clean up and return with a towel, offering it to him. “Thanks,” he murmured, captivated by the relaxation in Cooper’s face. He could look at that face all day and all night long, but he wasn’t stupid enough to say so. It occurred to him to wonder what would happen next as he rubbed himself dry with the towel – Cooper had driven him here. Either he’d take him back to his truck, tell him to move to one of the other bedrooms they’d passed, or….
36 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux Cooper waited until Lucas had cleaned up and handed the towel back. He tossed it aside, smirking as he climbed back onto the massive bed and kissed Lucas again, letting his fingers run through the man’s hair as he did so. “Worn out yet?” he asked teasingly. Lucas smiled as he figured out that Cooper wasn’t done with him. He slowly shook his head, blue eyes gleaming. He wanted a chance to explore the other man’s body, touching and licking and memorizing. He reached up and slid his hand over Cooper’s still-pebbled nipples. “May I touch?” he asked. Cooper snorted in amusement and slid his arms under Lucas to begin dragging him further up the bed clumsily. “So polite when you’re not in your hard hat,” he huffed as he reached up and tugged the covers down, then struggled to get both their bodies under the sheets. When he finally succeeded, he turned onto his side to face Lucas and slung his leg over the man’s hip. “Touch all you like, boss,” he drawled as he slid his hand over Lucas’s waist. Chuckling, Lucas coasted one hand over Cooper’s chest, the other over his thigh. “You like manhandling me?” he asked, amusement glinting in his eyes. Cooper flushed and shifted closer. He smiled in sudden embarrassment, ducking his head for a moment before looking back up and settling his head on the pillow with a huff. “Maybe?” he finally answered, color still tinting his tanned cheeks. Now that the rush of passion had ebbed – ebbed because he knew it would come back if the other man stayed this close, this naked, all night – he couldn’t help but be slightly embarrassed over his… handling of the boss. He tended to say and do things in the heat of the moment that he would never dream of saying or doing normally. “Only maybe?” Lucas teased, his hand moving to squeeze Cooper’s delectable ass. He felt absolutely giddy and had no desire to gloss it over. Cooper’s body jerked with the squeeze, and he laughed in amusement and surprise as he slid closer. “You’re a head case, you know that?” he asked with a small smile.
Under Contract | 37 “Hmmm?” Lucas answered as he nuzzled just below Cooper’s ear. He breathed in deeply, trying to memorize that scent of sex and heat and Cooper. Cooper shivered and gasped a little as the thrill ran through his body. “I… I forgot what I was saying,” he muttered as he returned the nuzzling and the groping. Lucas snickered, amused to be the one nominally in control of himself now. “You said I was a head case,” he prompted, sliding his hand around to the front of Cooper’s thigh. “I’ve never seen you happy,” Cooper muttered in explanation as he tried not to tremble under the gentle touches. Propping himself up on one elbow, Lucas looked down at the other man as he lightly stroked along his hip. “Maybe I wasn’t,” he murmured. “Why?” Cooper found himself asking softly. Lucas pursed his lips as he thought about what to say. “I moved here for this job. Left behind friends. Came here and had no one. Work too much to find more friends, you know? And you know what the guys on site think about me. So it’s lonely,” he said quietly. “And then you showed up….” “And I made it worse?” Cooper asked with a wince, feeling guilty even though logically he knew there was nothing to feel guilty for. Kissing the corner of Cooper’s mouth, Lucas shook his head. “Gave me something to look forward to every day.” Cooper felt himself blushing once more, and he unconsciously turned his head toward the gentle kiss. “I’m not sure what to say to that,” he admitted candidly. Lucas shrugged, kissing the other man’s neck lightly. “Don’t have to say anything,” he murmured. “It just is, no matter what you decide.” He sat up a bit. “I’ve sort of tried to go out of the way to not stalk you or anything.” Cooper blinked up at the man and readjusted where he was sprawled. The word ‘decide’ seemed to echo through his head and a twist of nerves assaulted him. He brought his arm up and rested his head in the
38 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux palm of his hand and looked up at his bedmate with wide eyes, trying desperately to decide what to do. Decide. Oh Christ. Usually you got a little more warning with the whole love thing before you had to ‘decide.’ Usually you were at least on speaking terms with the person. “Stalk?” he finally asked with a small smile, pretending he’d not noticed the usage of the D word. Wincing a little, Lucas peered at him. “Well, it’s kind of hard to resist sometimes… following you around the job site. I have a thing for….” He stopped and cleared his throat, cheeks flushing. “A thing for… what?” Cooper coaxed as he smiled up at the man. He reached up and slid his fingers into Lucas’s hair, letting his hand stroke down to wrap around the man’s neck and squeeze gently. Lucas looked away and worried at his bottom lip before answering. “I’ve got a thing for your ass in those dark jeans you wear sometimes,” he admitted. Cooper had to compress his lips in order to not smile in amusement. “Those got some acid burns on them a while back,” he informed the man regretfully. Sighing, Lucas mourned the dark jeans. “Damn,” he said quietly while his hand crept over Cooper’s hip and squeezed the ass he’d ogled over and over. “Guess I’ll have to look at the real thing instead. Such a hardship,” he murmured, turning his face back to Cooper’s to try and steal a kiss. Cooper growled softly into the kiss, tightening his grip on the other man’s neck and sliding his foot teasingly between Lucas’s to warm his cold toes. “Do you shower in the morning or at night?” he asked between nips at warm lips. Lucas practically purred as they rubbed slowly against each other. “Night… when I come home. Usually a fucking mess,” he murmured, still pressing his lips to warm, sweaty skin. “Me, too,” Cooper growled. “I don’t mind going to bed dirty tonight, though,” he added as he lifted his chin and closed his eyes. He moaned without realizing it and raised one knee unconsciously.
Under Contract | 39 Taking the opportunity to push his stiffening cock against Cooper’s moving thigh, Lucas sucked in a breath as he kept dropping little teasing nips and kisses. “Me, either,” he muttered before sliding his tongue along the shell of Cooper’s ear. Cooper groaned softly again, turning his body into Lucas’s and pressing up against him. “Been a long time since someone stuck around after fucking to grope me,” he murmured happily. “I’ll stay as long as you’ll have me,” Lucas said before leaning to capture his full, swollen lips again, slowly licking them hungrily. “You’re one of those wind-up toys, aren’t you?” Cooper groaned after the long, wet kiss even as his own body began to slowly respond once more. “Give you five minutes, then you’re ready to go again.” He laughed as his hands traveled down smooth skin. Lucas chuckled, half leaning over Cooper. “I’ve had a while to get wound up, you know,” he teased, shifting his hips against Cooper’s thigh. Cooper growled softly and nodded. “You’ve wanted to fuck me?” he asked in a low, suddenly seductive voice as he hooked his leg over Lucas’s thigh and used his foot to pull the man closer. For some reason he hadn’t actually come to that realization yet tonight. To think that all this time Lucas had been lusting after him hit him right in the groin. “God, yes,” Lucas growled. “My favorite wet dream.” Cooper’s body responded to that growl like nothing he had ever known. He practically tingled, the hair on his arms stood on end and his groin throbbed with the jolt of pleasure. “God,” he managed to breathe in response, and he raised his arms over his head and stretched like a large cat sunning itself, an offer of his body to the other man to do with it what he would. A slow smile pulled at Lucas’s lips as he watched, rapt. “I think you like that idea. Like thinking about me waking up from a wet dream about you and jacking off?” He dragged his hand down Cooper’s stretched-out body. Cooper writhed under the touches, his back arching. He couldn’t find a voice for a reply, and so he simply nodded and moaned softly.
40 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux “Mmmmm. Maybe I can show you sometime,” Lucas murmured as he continued to rub over the other man’s chest and belly and hip and groin. “I bet you’d like hearing me call your name when I come, too.” He was shameless. Shameless! But the vision in front of him was too alluring to withstand, and he was pulling out all the stops. He ached with needing Cooper to want him. Cooper forced his eyes to open as he exhaled in a rush of air, and he looked up at the other man pleadingly. “You’ve gotten me in bed after all this time,” he said breathlessly. “Why don’t you show me what you’ve been imagining, hmm?” he suggested with a glint in his eyes as he raised his hips slowly. “I bet you want me on my knees, don’t you?” he growled impishly. Lucas closed his eyes as raw want flooded him. “On your knees, on your back, up against a wall… fuck – any way I can have you,” he breathed, reopening blue eyes that glittered with renewed desire. Cooper lay under Lucas for a long moment, biting his lower lip and watching in fascination as the need re-entered Lucas’s eyes. Finally he shifted, pushing Lucas off him gently, and rolled to the edge of the bed to open the drawer in the bedside table. He rummaged through the assortment of junk in there and finally came up with the little three-pack box of condoms he had desperately hoped was in there. Tilting his head in question, Lucas let Cooper push him away, and he shifted back onto his side, watching curiously. When he yanked open the nightstand drawer, a flutter of nerves launched in Lucas’s gut. Cooper was… really… going to let him… oh Christ. His hand strayed down his belly to grasp his cock, feeling it fill and twitch as he waited. And hoped. Cooper yanked the last condom out of the box and tossed the cardboard to the floor as he rolled back over. He waved the foil in Lucas’s face and smirked. “I don’t usually bottom passively,” he warned as he sat up to retrieve the tube of lubricant he had tossed aside earlier. Lucas blinked as his eyes widened at Cooper’s comment. It struck him as hilariously funny. “There is nothing passive about you,” he said, struggling not to laugh. “Quite the opposite. I think it’ll be something like trying to ride a bull. A really gorgeous, tight-assed bull,” he said as
Under Contract | 41 he sat up, slid his hands around Cooper’s midsection and dragged him back between his legs and against his chest. Cooper huffed in amusement and shook his head as he was manhandled. The fact that Lucas had these opinions of him was just surreal. As was finding someone strong enough to actually pull him around like that. When had his foreman found the time to observe him as he apparently did? And why had Cooper never noticed such intense scrutiny? “I’m going to disregard the fact that you just called me a large smelly animal and a tight-ass,” he advised the man as he slung one leg over Lucas’s hip and kissed him. “Because I don’t often get a chance to be fucked,” he explained with a growl of relish as he again rolled to his side and then pushed up onto his hands and knees. He looked down and to the side to show sparkling green eyes to the other man as he rolled his shoulders and flexed his muscles invitingly. Shuddering, Lucas sat up and shifted to his knees, ripping open the condom and rolling it on before grabbing the lubricant and squeezing some into his hand. Taking advantage of his bigger frame, he settled right up against Cooper’s ass and slid a slick finger through his cleft while covering the other man’s back with his own body and nipping at his ear. “We can change that, if you want,” he breathed, the tip of his finger teasing the clenching pucker. “I want,” Cooper growled as he pushed back against Lucas’s hand. “Now,” he added with a shudder of pleasure. Lucas moaned darkly as he slid his finger in – not that Cooper gave him much choice, pushing back like that. First knuckle, second knuckle, more – listening to Cooper’s moans while his own cock throbbed painfully. “More,” Cooper ordered in a hoarse voice, his head hanging as he panted through the stretching. Two thick, long fingers, and soon after, three, and Lucas had to lower his forehead to Cooper’s upper back, struggling for control. “Ready?” he asked shakily in a raspy voice. It took Cooper a few long, deep breaths before he was able to merely nod in answer. He pushed back against Lucas’s fingers and cried
42 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux out softly in surprise as pleasure ripped through him. “Hurry,” he urged breathlessly, knowing he wouldn’t last long regardless of how recent his latest orgasm had been. Lucas took a deep, steadying breath and pushed himself back to his knees. He took himself in hand, gripped Cooper’s hip with his other hand as he lined his cock up, and pushed. He didn’t realize he was holding his breath until the swollen head popped inside, and he let it out in a gasping rush of air. “Oh God,” Cooper gasped, over and over as Lucas pushed deeper into him. “Ted,” he breathed pleadingly, the name sounding foreign to him. “Hard,” he begged. It had been so long since he had been properly fucked. “Fuck,” Lucas breathed, and then he jerked his hips to sink the rest of the way in. “Aw, fuck,” he whimpered as he dragged himself out, making sure he had Cooper’s hips held firmly before thrusting in – all the way in – hard. Just as Cooper’d asked for. Cooper cried out wordlessly, his body beginning to tremble already and his fingers grasping at the sheets desperately. “Yes,” he groaned approvingly. He lowered his shoulders and pushed his hips up, trying to find the right angle. “Fuck, you feel good!” he groaned, delighting in the way he was being filled, the muscles tightening involuntarily against the intrusion. “More. Please more.” “You feel fuckin’ amazing,” Lucas moaned in return. Feeling Cooper’s hips shimmy, he bent his knees and thrust up and in harder at a different angle. “Let me know when you get what you want,” he said raggedly, his hips now snapping against Cooper’s ass. It was everything he’d ever dreamed and more. If he died tonight, he’d die a deliriously happy man. The only thing he could imagine being better was if Cooper could ever, somehow, feel the same way he did. Cooper rested on his elbows, pushing back against each thrust, and the desire to feel Lucas closer to him was almost too much to bear. He reached behind him and gripped Lucas’s hip as he slowly flattened his chest to the mattress, pulling the man with him. He groaned wantonly when his cock pressed into the soft sheets, and his fingers tightened in the hard muscle of Lucas’s flank.
Under Contract | 43 “Oh, sweet Jesus,” Lucas moaned as Cooper’s change of position had him driving down into his ass. He spread his knees for better leverage, his hands sliding up the other man’s back. Cooper shifted his hips and spread his legs wider as he pushed flat against the bed, then raised his hands above his head, splaying his fingers to give him the leverage he needed to hold himself still against the thrusts. The shift of Cooper’s body affected the angle so much that Lucas’s gut clenched hard, and he about lost it right then and there. His hips lost rhythm for a few moments as he recovered, and with a growl, he released Cooper’s hips and leaned over his back and held down his hands. His body weight settled fully onto the man below him as he fucked him into the mattress. “Is this what you want?” he growled into Cooper’s ear. Cooper turned his face to the side and panted, trying to answer. “Someone big enough and strong enough to hold you down and fuck you into oblivion?” “Yes,” Cooper admitted breathlessly. “Yes,” he moaned again. He flexed his arms experimentally, groaning wantonly when he felt Lucas’s weight holding him down. Gritting his teeth to hold onto his control, Lucas kept thrusting. “Is it your favorite wet dream?” he gasped out. “It was,” Cooper panted in answer, his toes curling with the pleasure. Growling as he felt his balls draw up, Lucas leaned over to bite Cooper’s neck and used his tongue to lave at the marks. “Was?” he grunted. Cooper gasped at the bite and arched his back desperately as anticipation and pleasure billowed within him. “I can guarantee you the next time I wake up hard I will have been dreaming about you,” he groaned with difficulty, punctuating it with a cry of pleasure. “There! Fuck yes!” Shifting his hips the same way again, Lucas groaned as he drew that yell out of Cooper again and again. “Fuck, Nick, I’m going to come,” he said hurriedly. “Not yet,” Cooper pleaded with a desperate moan. “Please,” he moaned, burying his face in the sheets. He cried out again, hands still
44 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux pinned to the bed, and he bucked his hips, pushing them back and then forward for the friction of the mattress on his cock. “Please,” he rasped desperately. Lucas thought he’d try to move mountains if Cooper muttered that one little word. He bit the inside of his cheek so hard it shocked him, and he was able to keep fucking, ramming his groin against the other man’s ass. He licked his lips and bent over again, this time biting Cooper’s shoulder, hoping he could earn another abandoned cry. “Fuck,” Cooper whispered. “Fuck fuck fuck fuck… Yes!” he finally shouted inelegantly at the sharp jolt on his shoulder combined with the pounding inside him. His fingers curled in the sheets and his body tensed, the muscles surrounding Lucas’s cock tightening around him. He groaned a series of nonsense that trailed into a desperate scream as he spilled himself out against the sheets. The sudden clench all around him forced a shocked bellow out of Lucas, and with one last push he was coming hard, hips stuttering with each pulse as he gave several gasping cries. Shaking, he strained to hold himself up over Cooper’s back, still buried deep in him. Cooper’s tense body slowly relaxed as the aftershocks faded, and he sighed languidly and turned his head to the side again to try and look up at Lucas behind him. “Was that how you saw it?” he asked out of morbid curiosity in a hoarse voice. Forcing himself to pull out slowly before he dropped like a log at Cooper’s side, Lucas pulled open one eye to look at him. “Huh?” he asked intelligently. Cooper smiled and merely purred deep in his throat as he crawled closer on his elbows. Instead of repeating the question he kissed the man languidly, licking at his lips and nipping at him as his lower body throbbed pleasantly. “My mind wants to fuck you until you scream again,” he murmured. “But my body is still wondering where its dinner went.” He snickered. Lucas chuckled tiredly, raising a hand to comb his fingers through Cooper’s sweaty hair. “That’s ’cause we didn’t eat dinner,” he reminded him. “I don’t mind a rain check.” “For dinner or for being fucked?” Cooper asked without thinking.
Under Contract | 45 Instead of answering aloud, Lucas reached up to cup Cooper’s face and pull him into a languid, promising kiss. When he pulled back, he lightly licked Cooper’s lower lip. “You had your evil way with me. Now feed me,” he said in a mock-demanding tone. “Feed you,” Cooper echoed in disbelief. “You want me to get out of bed?” he asked in horror. His hand roamed down the man’s body shamelessly. “Fuck, those are some nice abs, you know that?” he muttered distractedly as he curled his body and bent to lick across Lucas’s stomach slowly. Lucas laughed until he felt hot, wet tongue on his skin, and it turned to a weak moan. “Glad you like,” he said shakily. “You have my approval,” Cooper said softly as he lifted his head to look up at Lucas with sparkling green eyes. “What would you like for dinner, boss?” he asked. The words were out before Lucas could stop them. “I’ll be content with whatever crumbs and scraps you throw my way,” he murmured, looking at Cooper intently, wanting to memorize this moment. “I think I can do better than crumbs and scraps,” Cooper grinned as he crawled up Lucas’s body and kissed him gently. “There’s a spare robe in the bathroom,” he murmured after another short kiss, and he began crawling off the bed. “If you get off on watching people cook, that is,” he added with a smirk as he grabbed his shirt and faded jeans off the floor and quickly slid into them. He didn’t care that he was sweaty and sticky. Actually, tonight that was sort of a plus for some reason. Kind of kinky for him, but there it was. Sort of glad Cooper didn’t catch the double meaning of what he’d said – Lord knows he’d been sappy enough tonight – Lucas smiled and watched that gorgeous ass as it got covered up. “I’m going to duck into the bathroom. Be out in a bit,” he said quietly. “Should have plenty of towels in there,” Cooper nodded as he headed for the bedroom door. “If not, just shout.” He grinned as he stopped in the doorway and watched the man for a moment. “You okay?” he asked seriously. A slow smile transformed Lucas’s face. “More okay than I’ve been in a long time,” he said, still soaking in the sight of the other man.
46 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux Cooper’s lips twitched, and he nodded in response. “You like pasta?” he asked after a minute of thought. Lucas nodded as he sat up. “Yeah.” Cooper watched the man for a moment longer, knowing something wasn’t quite right but not able to put his finger on it. “Make yourself at home,” he finally offered sincerely before smiling brilliantly at the man and turning to head for the kitchen. Watching Cooper walk down the hall, Lucas couldn’t hide the intense yearning any longer, and his hands twisted in the sheets to keep him from running down the hall after him. It almost physically hurt to see him walk away, although he knew full well it was only to the other room. Lucas laid back, his head falling against a thick pillow, and he looked up at the ceiling blindly. What now? He’d bared his heart and his body, and Cooper didn’t seem to mind. But would he come to crave what Lucas did? Sighing, he pushed himself out of the bed and padded over to the bathroom for a quick wash up. Some splashes of cold water would help clear his head. In the kitchen, Cooper was humming to himself as he rummaged for the appropriate ingredients. He liked to cook, although he rarely did simply because cooking for one person was a little too time-consuming for a man who worked like he did. As he went through the familiar motions of his favorite dish, a wave of nervous dread washed through him. He felt guilty about tonight. Already. He felt as if he had taken advantage of Lucas’s state of mind. The man had professed to love him. It had been, admittedly, an easy fuck. But Cooper certainly hadn’t been looking at it that way. Had he? Surely not… no. But still, no matter how much he had enjoyed it or how much Lucas seemed to have enjoyed it, it was beginning to feel wrong. Morally wrong. Like taking home a really gorgeous drunk, wrong. He wasn’t looking at it as a lifetime kind of thing, but Lucas likely was, if what he had said was true. The wrongness had nothing to do with the problem of fucking his boss. Yet…. Walking back out of the bathroom, Lucas skipped the robe and pulled his jeans back on sans briefs. Hopefully he’d have the jeans back off before long. He stood looking at the mess they’d made of the bed, feeling the weight of many possibilities pushing him down – his love, the
Under Contract | 47 mind-blowing sex, Cooper’s easy manner – it could all so easily add up to a one-night romp and exit, stage left, by Cooper. No strings. No regrets. Just a good time. Lucas’s lips twisted, and he sighed. Especially since Cooper was transferring off the crew. Nothing to be done about it now. He wanted whatever he could get, and he’d have to be content with that. Turning on his heel, he headed out to the kitchen. Cooper had just finished the quickie meal when Lucas came strolling into the kitchen, and he stopped short and let his eyes take in the bare chest and abundance of hard muscle. Wow. This was the part he hated, though. The moment in the evening where he was unsure whether they’d be spending the night together or if his visitor was ready to be taken home. And the worst part was that outside of work and the bedroom, Cooper still didn’t know a damn thing about the other man. His fucking boss. “Decided to forego the robe, hmm?” he asked with a small smile, gently prodding for some idea as to whether Lucas would stay or go after they ate. The fact that he was half-dressed didn’t say a lot. Lucas stopped in the doorway, leaning against the trim, taking the time to look over Cooper again to help steady his shaky nerves. He wondered why the hell he could be so open and wanton in bed, but clam up like a nervous virgin here. He offered a half-smile and shrugged, trying desperately to think of something witty to say. “Didn’t want to obscure the view,” he said after a bit, trying for sexy nonchalance. “You’re so very good to me,” Cooper crooned as he winked at the man and grabbed two plates from the glass-fronted cabinet behind him. “I didn’t fix much ’cause if we’re going to bed soon I figured it….” He trailed off as he realized what he’d said and he sighed. He slumped his shoulders dejectedly and placed the plates on the counter top with a shake of his head. “I’m sorry. I feel pretty damn stupid asking this, but… are you planning to stay the night?” he blurted before he could rethink it. Surprised, Lucas went blank for a long moment, looking at Cooper as if he could see into him and find the answer. After a quiet minute passed and he could see Cooper getting a bit agitated, he slid a hand into his pocket. “It’s your house, Nick,” he said quietly. “I’d like to stay, but
48 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux it’s your decision.” He didn’t remember that it was the second decision he’d laid at Cooper’s feet. “You promised me orange juice in the morning,” Cooper murmured in response as he flipped the dishtowel in his hand over his shoulder. “And this house gets a bit cold at night, with the other half still not finished yet, so I was sort of hoping you’d keep my toes warm.” Lucas didn’t realize how soft the look in his eyes was as he leaned his head against the trim, still looking at Cooper. “I do tend to be a space heater. Can’t usually stand the covers, myself. Hence the A/C in the trailer,” he said. “So I’d be real good at that.” “We’ll just have to get up in time to get to the site before anyone else,” Cooper responded with a grin. “And I have some shirts that might fit,” he murmured as he purposely let his eyes travel over the expanse of bare skin. Not wanting to even think about connecting work to his time here, Lucas instead focused on how Cooper was looking him over… and grinning. “I’m guessing you’re not too underwhelmed,” he murmured as he straightened up and walked over to the butcher-block topped bar. “Underwhelmed?” Cooper echoed in confusion. Sliding onto the stool, Lucas settled his chin in one hand. “Well, I was feeling like a fine piece of meat being ogled in the butcher shop – made me think you liked what you were seeing,” he said quietly, voice a little off, as if he were unsure of what he was saying. Hell. He was unsure. His self-confidence tended to go right down the drain when he wasn’t at work, where his height and muscles came in handy. Not so much when trying to date or be close to someone. Cooper flushed slightly and looked down as he dished out two portions of pasta onto the plates. “I’m sorry,” he offered with a glance up at Lucas. “I only ogle those who deserve it,” he tried with a small smile. Blue eyes turned bright with sparkles, and Lucas’s smile was honest. “Then I don’t mind. Not one bit,” he said, taking the plate when it was offered. Inside, he was jumping up and down in glee. Cooper liked his body. Wanted to ogle him. It was something, anyway!
Under Contract | 49 Cooper watched him with a small frown as he stuck a fork in the man’s pasta for him. “You really have no idea how completely hot you are, do you?” he asked, hoping his tone didn’t betray as much guilt as he felt. Lucas looked up from his plate, fork pausing in mid-air, his surprise clear on his face. “Hot?” That jumping up and down inside? Now spinning. Like crazy. He distractedly wondered about the odd inflection in Cooper’s voice, but was so thrilled by the comment that he couldn’t focus on it. “Ah. No, I don’t guess so. I was asked to pose for a fund-raising calendar once, and the ladies seemed to like it, but I didn’t think it was that great.” Cooper’s eyes sparkled mischievously, and he leaned closer as he spun pasta around his fork. “Are there copies?” he asked gleefully. Brow furrowing, Lucas nodded. “I’ve got a box stashed in a closet somewhere. I was supposed to try to sell them at work, but no way. I just bought the damn box full. Why?” “I want one!” Cooper laughed. Lucas shrugged. “Sure, plenty of ‘buff’ guys in there,” he said, lips twitching as he thought about Cooper’s preferences. Or maybe he actually did want to see the picture of him posed shirtless and sweaty on a work site, tool belt low on his hips, complete with hard hat. He’d thought it looked… well, stupid. It wasn’t like he really worked like that. But his sister and her friends had squealed and jumped up and down and thanked him over and over for the ridiculous calendar full of similar pictures. “It was for a good cause,” he added. “I’ll bet,” Cooper muttered wryly, smiling as he continued to twirl pasta idly around his fork. He bit his lip and looked down at his plate. They ate in silence for a few moments, until Cooper could no longer contain the guilt that was swelling within him. “I owe you an apology, Ted,” he muttered regretfully. Lucas’s eyes flickered up and took note of the other man’s bent shoulders, the tinge of regret in his voice, and he knew. He went cold all over, but tried not to overreact as he carefully set down his fork. “For?” he asked. He was proud his voice didn’t shake. At least Cooper was
50 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux being nice about it. Couldn’t have asked for better than that, he thought distantly. “I shouldn’t have… I shouldn’t have pounced you like I did,” Cooper answered guiltily as he looked up at Lucas finally and grimaced. “It put you at a… well, it gave me an unfair advantage over you. You told me you loved me, for chrissake,” he tried to explain in frustration as he attempted to gauge Lucas’s emotions. “I mean...” he sighed and shook his head. “I feel like I took advantage of you,” he said dejectedly. “I’m sorry for that. I’m not sorry for dragging you home and fucking you, but I am sorry for that.” It took a minute for Lucas to sort out that Number 1: Cooper wasn’t kicking him out; Number 2: Cooper didn’t regret them having sex; and Number 3: Cooper was really, really a nice guy at heart, just like Lucas had always thought he was. “You didn’t do anything I didn’t want you to,” Lucas said firmly, a little of the bossman creeping back into his voice and demeanor. “There was no coercion involved, no blackmail, no yanking on my heartstrings just to get me to turn over.” Anymore than usual, anyway. Just looking at Cooper made his heart ache. But Cooper certainly hadn’t played on that. Cooper watched the man silently, nodding finally and sighing. “I know how much it hurts to say ‘I’m in love with you’ and not hear it back,” he murmured finally. “Those are words I don’t take lightly. I’d like… I....” He stuttered to a stop and looked away, suddenly unable to finish with Lucas’s eyes on him. “I’d like a chance, though,” he finally blurted out as he forced himself to look back up. “You deserve a chance.” It might have been shock. It might have been amazement. Regardless, Lucas just fell even further and harder. If this didn’t work out – he was going to be torn all to hell. But he couldn’t back out now. Not if there was an iota of a chance. He reached across the bar and gently cupped Cooper’s cheek in one hand. He could only think of one thing to say. “Thank you,” he whispered. “Don’t thank me yet,” Cooper warned as he reached up and pressed his hand to Lucas’s. “We still have the left side of the bed to fight over, remember?” he asked with a smile. “And I’m not used to having someone,” he admitted. “With me, I mean. I can’t promise the man you
Under Contract | 51 think you’re in love with is actually me.” He realized that was his biggest fear, that Lucas had romanticized him to the point he would never be able to live up to it. And it shocked him to no end, but he was beginning to realize that he wanted to live up to what Lucas saw. It had the potential to be an amazing thing for them. Lucas’s lips quirked, and without even thinking about it, he shared possibly the first personal information about himself with Cooper. “I’ve lived with only one person before, for two years. But he always said I was a pain in the ass to have around. Except when something needed fixing.” He shrugged and sat back. “As for who you are,” he said as he locked his eyes on Cooper, “I’ll just have to learn, won’t I?” Cooper was nodding slowly, watching Lucas’s eyes as he spoke. “Okay,” he said finally before taking another bite of his pasta and chewing thoughtfully. “Your first lesson,” he offered officiously. “I’ve only ever gone three times in one night once before, and there was tequila involved. So don’t expect any more action until at least midnight,” he grinned. In the middle of swallowing, Lucas about choked on the pasta, coughing wildly as his eyes watered. Cooper laughed softly and shook his head as he reached over and gently patted the man’s back. “Sorry,” he offered unapologetically. “This doesn’t bode well for your blowjob skills, you realize,” he added cheekily as he rubbed the hard muscles of Lucas’s shoulders. Lucas winced and finally managed to swallow. “You’ve seen about the extent of my education,” he muttered under his breath, cheeks flushing. Nick grinned and shifted back over to his stool in order to continue eating before his pasta became irrevocably cold and gross. “Which one do you like better?” he asked impishly. “Practice makes perfect or watch and learn?” Chuckling, Lucas lifted another forkful of pasta. “I am a hands-on kind of guy.” It was well known around the work site that given half a chance, the foreman would be out of the trailer in a shot to help with something. Anything to get away from the hated paperwork. Cooper watched the man with a smile as they both ate in a suddenly comfortable silence. He was on his last mouthful when he
52 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux realized that unless he did something about it, he only had until the end of this job before his self-induced transfer. He swallowed heavily and set his fork down slowly, his face going slowly ashen as he stood and picked the dirty dish up and turned away to set it in the sink. Finishing his meal, Lucas picked up his plate and fork and followed, stacking his dishes in the same place. “Want me to wash these up?” he asked before glancing up to see Cooper looking uncomfortable. Lucas tilted his head. “Nick?” he asked quietly. “Leave ’em,” Cooper murmured with a shake of his head. “I just… I’d forgotten about my request for a transfer,” he explained woodenly as he turned to face the man and leaned against the sink counter. Lucas wanted very much to kick and punch something, but he knew it wouldn’t help. Not at all. Instead he shoved both hands in his pockets. “I figure we’ve got about nine weeks left on site,” he said quietly, cursing himself the whole time. “Maybe I can catch the request and have it canceled,” Cooper told him hopefully. “I mean….” Just watching silently, Lucas had to bite his lip to keep from agreeing heartily. As much as he wanted Cooper, he knew the other man would have to make this choice for himself or he might resent Lucas later. But he couldn’t look away, and he was suddenly afraid what he wanted would be clear on his face. “I’ll call them tomorrow, first thing,” Cooper decided with a nod to himself as he watched Lucas’s blue eyes glitter with hope. “Tell them something believable, I’m sure,” he muttered as he took the dishtowel from his shoulder and threw it on the counter. He scowled at the granite counter top and pressed his lips tightly together. Chest aching, Lucas moved behind him to slide both hands under Cooper’s arms to hold him loosely, hands clasped at his waist. “You don’t have to decide right now,” he said shakily. He was cursing himself for being such a goddamn martyr, but what else could he do? Cooper was obviously unsettled about the whole thing. “Fuck that,” Cooper growled in frustration. If only he’d read Lucas better. But then who would have ever guessed at this outcome? Lucas blinked at Cooper’s strong retort, but it didn’t shake him enough to
Under Contract | 53 make him move. “Now that I know you don’t hate me, there’s no reason for me to leave my crew,” Cooper growled. The anger cooled as he thought more about the site. “How is this going to work?” he asked curiously after a moment of merely enjoying warm arms around him. “I don’t know how it’s going to work,” Lucas said honestly. “Never thought it would happen at all.” He thought about the trailer and all the ‘trouble’ he could get into with Cooper there. He felt his gut clench, and he leaned over to press his lips to the warm skin behind Cooper’s ear. “Am I allowed in the trailer now?” Cooper asked seriously. “You’re allowed,” Lucas murmured, tongue darting out to lap at soft skin, hoping Cooper wouldn’t mind him being so forward. “’Course, I may not let you leave if you come in. Need lots of help with that goddamn paperwork,” he muttered. Cooper smiled and closed his eyes, tilting his head to the side to allow for better access. “On second thought, we may need to keep me out of your trailer,” he murmured. “Boss,” he purred as his hands slid behind him and around Lucas’s hips. “What would you say to crawling under the covers and leaving work behind tonight?” he asked in a soft, persuasive voice as he nuzzled against the scruff of Lucas’s cheek behind him. The long, low purr Lucas heard was coming from his own chest. “I’d say hell yeah,” he answered, lips still sliding along Cooper’s neck. He slowly tightened his arms, bringing the other man’s body firmly against his own, Cooper’s ass knocking into his interested erection. “Down, boy,” Cooper laughed softly. “You’re going to wear me out,” he warned. “And you saw today what happens when I get no sleep.” Lucas chuckled and pressed one more kiss to the back of Cooper’s neck. “C’mon. We’ll thrash out who sleeps where before we crash,” he said, taking Cooper’s hand and pulling him behind him as he walked. Cooper followed along with a small smile. The truth was, he slept in the middle. But he wouldn’t mind a little scuffling between the sheets with the man dragging him down the hall. Turning down the lights using the dimmer switch, Lucas walked over to the edge of the bed and sat down, elbows on his thighs. “I’ve got an idea for the whole left side / right side thing,” he said, more because he wanted Cooper as close as he
54 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux could get him. It was a gift, being able to just sleep with him. Really sleep – and most preferably, hold him all night as well. “Do tell,” Cooper invited with an amused smirk as he began to unbutton his shirt once more. He really needed to shower, but it could wait. Maybe he could even convince his new bedwarmer to join him. “You wanted a blanket,” Lucas reminded him, leaning back on his elbows. “Maybe you can have whatever side you want, and I’ll just drape myself over you.” Cooper smirked and lunged forward, grabbing the back of Lucas’s neck and kissing him as he crawled on top of him and pressed him back into the bed with a soft, purring growl. “Nice plan,” he commented in a soft voice as he slid his hands up Lucas’s arms, pushing them over his head and gently gripping his wrists to press them into the mattress. “That’s why you’re the boss, I bet,” he mumbled as he began to kiss down the man’s neck slowly. Lucas purred and turned his head to expose more of his neck. He didn’t struggle against being held down; rather, it sent a shock wave through his gut that made him wiggle a little under Cooper’s body. Cooper was warming to the idea of taking part in another round of completely inappropriate fucking with his foreman when he heard the telltale beepbeep of his Nextel from the clip on his jeans. He growled against Lucas’s neck as he pushed himself up and cocked his head to the side to listen. “Coop?” the electronic voice crackled over the walkie talkie. There was a pause as the man on the other end waited for Cooper to respond. “Nick? You there?” the nearly unintelligible voice asked after a moment. Cooper sighed as he recognized the voice. The crew knew full well that if they needed anything after hours, Cooper was usually willing and able to help them. More than once he had gone to pick up a group of drunk co-workers and drove them home from a bar or restaurant. He had done a few hospital visits, the most notable when Lewis Parker had been trying to free his wife’s yappy lap dog from a jammed freezer and knocked himself out cold when the door had come free. His wife had called Cooper, claiming that she couldn’t leave her precious puppy alone
Under Contract | 55 to take her husband to the ER. Six months later Cooper had been called in the middle of the night to help bury the dog in Parker’s back yard and subsequently sign as a witness for the divorce petition. “Maybe he’ll give up,” Cooper whispered hopefully to Lucas as he kissed at his neck slowly. When Travis called it was almost always for a place to stay the night, because the twenty-year-old still lived with his mother and didn’t like going home drunk. “As long as it’s not serious,” Lucas breathed, eyes fluttering shut. He knew several of the men shamelessly took advantage of the assistant foreman, but Cooper didn’t seem to mind. Cooper growled softly and nipped at the tender skin of Lucas’s neck as his Nextel beeped at him again. “Nick?” the voice inquired. “It’s not that late, man, I know you’re not in bed! I’m stranded, dude, I need a ride!” it pleaded plaintively. Cooper groaned slightly and pushed back up to look down at Lucas in frustration. Chuckling, Lucas’s lips twitched at the look on Cooper’s face. “They take advantage of you, you know. I’ve heard about it,” he murmured. He wanted to touch, but Cooper was still holding his hands down. “I know,” Cooper responded in a hoarse whisper. “But the first time I ignore it...” he trailed off and shook his head, not even wanting to think about one of his boys being in an accident or something just because they hadn’t been able to find a ride. He growled and bent to kiss Lucas again, then reached back to grab the Nextel and yank it out of its holster. “Are you drunk?” he demanded of the kid with a beep. “That would be illegal, sir,” Travis responded in an innocent voice that slurred noticeably. Cooper sighed and ran his free hand over Lucas’s chest slowly. “Where are you?” he asked the kid as he looked up and met Lucas’s eyes. As much of a disappointment as it was, Lucas couldn’t say a word against Cooper’s decision. He respected it – how he helped out the guys. Lord knows they’d never call Lucas, though he would have been happy to help them out. So he just nodded slightly, conveying his acceptance of the situation.
56 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux The answer came over the walkie talkie, and Cooper growled softly. It would only take about ten minutes to get there, but another forty to take the kid home and get back. And while an hour didn’t seem like all that much time, he didn’t want to leave Lucas here alone for that long. Lucas certainly wouldn’t want to go with him and have to explain why they were together. And Cooper certainly didn’t want to get home and find that they were both too tired to… continue. He slid his hand down Lucas’s body and looked at him regretfully. Travis was one of those kids with little patience and even less in the way of self-preservation instincts. He would find a way home, safe or not. “I’m sorry,” Cooper murmured to the man beneath him. “I’ll be there in twenty, kiddo,” he said to Travis as he held the button down. “Twenty! But it takes you like ten to get here!” “You want me showing up naked, fine! Be there in ten!” Cooper shouted in uncharacteristic frustration as he turned off the Nextel and tossed it to the floor. Lucas stifled a chuckle, seeing that Cooper wasn’t happy about it. He rubbed his hands soothingly over his chest. “It’s all right,” he murmured, looking up at him from where he still laid back against the bed. He had to grin. “I’m sure he’ll rag you about the naked comment, though. Travis is a cheeky asshole.” “I’m sorry,” Cooper murmured in response, unable to match the grin the other man gave him. “I won’t be long. Do you want to stay here?” he asked almost hopefully. “Or I can take you back to your truck.” Faced with his own decision, Lucas wondered what Cooper really wanted. “How long is it going to take?” he asked quietly. “Won’t take long for me to crash out without a diversion.” He really regretted that, too. Going home alone was going to be lonely as hell. “An hour, maybe less,” Cooper answered as he pushed up and stood slowly. His eyes traveled over Lucas’s body slowly, and he sighed regretfully. “I can take you back to the lot now, or we can wake up early in the morning and get there before anyone else,” he suggested. He didn’t want to come home to an empty bed tonight. Not at all. He thought about just asking Lucas to stay. But that last little bit of uncertainty and guilt stopped him.
Under Contract | 57 “I guess home would be best. I’m a bear in the morning. Getting me up earlier than usual wouldn’t be pleasant,” Lucas said quietly as he sat up. He wondered if his face showed how much he didn’t want to go home. But it must be what Cooper felt was best. He hadn’t asked him to stay. Cooper nodded and pressed his lips together, reaching out to give Lucas a hand to stand. The disappointment that flared and twisted in his chest was overwhelming, but he didn’t dare try to correct it. Instead he pulled Lucas close and kissed him slowly, his body screaming for him to tackle the man as he did so. “Better get moving then,” he finally murmured as he backed away. Tempted to fall apart under the soft, warm kiss, Lucas’s eyes were closed when Cooper ended it. He had to grit his teeth to hold it together. “Gotcha,” he said, leaning over to grab his shirt and socks, yanking them on before reaching for his boots, pulling at the laces. He didn’t look up at Cooper, just focusing on getting dressed and hurting inside. It wasn’t fair. To be over so quickly. It wasn’t fair. Cooper grabbed up his phone and jammed it into the holster with a muttered curse at it, then went about buttoning his shirt as he headed into the bathroom and grabbed one of the rubber bands he kept in a dish on the counter. He ran his fingers through his long hair and then pulled it back into a ponytail, hoping it masked the fact that he’d been rolling around in bed for half the evening. He came back out and sat beside Lucas on the end of the bed, sliding his feet into a pair of beat up leather flip flops and waiting until Lucas was ready. He didn’t speak for fear of apologizing again or requesting the man stay the night. It didn’t seem fair to him, somehow, to ask that Lucas hang around in a strange place, alone, waiting for Cooper to come back. In fact, now that he thought about it, it was almost insulting. He didn’t want to make him feel like he was some sort of whore, hanging around and waiting to be fucked again, right? Right. Jerking the laces tight, Lucas turned his head slightly to look at Cooper. Christ. His heart hurt. “Okay,” he said quietly, indicating he was ready.
58 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux Cooper nodded and stood, making his way down the long hallway. At the other end of the house, the plastic flapped noisily in a breeze and he stood and watched it when he got to the foyer entry. He had to get that done soon, it was starting to annoy him. Maybe tonight, when he came home to find an empty house that still smelled of homemade dinner and sex. He turned wordlessly and led the way out the door.
IT was quiet and a little tense on the way back, but maybe Lucas was just imagining it. He knew he felt tense, for more than one reason. He was trying really, really hard not to think about what had happened tonight. Not right now. When Cooper pulled the truck into the gravel lot and climbed out to open the gate, Lucas’s throat closed up. What was he going to say? Great ride, let’s do it again? Wish I didn’t have to go? Want to go out tomorrow? Before he could decide, Cooper hopped back into the cab, and they pulled up beside Lucas’s truck. Cooper put the vehicle in park and sighed softly as he gripped the steering wheel. No matter what the cause, this felt so wrong. This went against everything in his nature, to fuck someone and then send them on their way. He looked over impulsively and grabbed Lucas’s hand before the man could leave the cab. “You feel like meeting for breakfast?” he asked before he could think better of it. Lucas’s heart about stopped when Cooper grabbed his hand, but the question helped settle his nerves. “Yeah,” he answered quietly, and a smile tilted up the corners of his mouth. Cooper smiled in return and slid his fingers over Lucas’s slowly as he pulled his hand back. “Five? Denny’s?” he suggested, desperately wanting to suggest instead that he could cook breakfast, and they wouldn’t have to worry about meeting if they woke up together. His body was still complaining that it wasn’t done with Lucas yet. Lucas nodded. “Five,” he echoed as he stepped out of the big truck. Half shutting the door, he turned to look back into the cab. “Nick?” Cooper had already turned away and put the truck in gear, eager to haul ass out to pick up Travis and then get the hell home and go to bed.
Under Contract | 59 He looked up in surprise at hearing his given name and blinked stupidly at the man. “Yeah?” Lucas gazed at him seriously. “Thanks. For the chance,” he said. Cooper licked his lips and tightened his grip on the steering wheel as he turned slightly to look at the man. He wasn’t sure what to say. Thank you for the really nice romp in bed? Thank you for saying I love you and not expecting it back? It doesn’t mean I’m a nice guy for taking a chance to fuck you senseless? Cooper shook his head and gave Lucas a small smile. “Get some sleep, boss,” he murmured. “See you in the a.m.” Lucas nodded and shut the door, digging in his pocket for his keys. He only stopped moving when he was sitting in his truck, door shut. His eyes flickered to the rearview mirror. Cooper’s truck kicked up dirt and gravel, forming a cloud of gray dust as he left in a hurry. Lucas’s eyes closed slowly, and he dropped his head to the steering wheel. Oh God. What had he been thinking? Declaring he loved the other man right to his face with no warning? Going home with him and having what was probably the best sex he’d had in his entire life? What would happen next? After sitting there a long time, Lucas decided he didn’t want to drive the half hour home. Instead he pulled an emergency duffel out of the back seat, locked up the truck, locked up the gate, and headed over to the trailer. There was a long cot in the third room he crashed in on late nights. He had the essentials in the bathroom. And he really, really didn’t want to go home to his cold, empty bed.
THE blaring of the alarm clock sent Nick Cooper jerking straight up and practically had him clinging to the exposed beams of his ceiling as it yanked him out of an exhausted sleep. He glanced over at the clock blearily, positive that it wasn’t yet time to get up. It had taken him nearly two hours to get Travis taken care of the night before, and he had been grimly thankful that Lucas hadn’t stayed over. He had literally been steaming when he’d gotten home. He’d muttered to himself as he had taken a shower, and he’d fallen into bed angry, roughly three hours ago. He woke up angry as well, glaring at the offending green numbers. 4:47.
60 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux “Shit!” Cooper cried as he threw the sheets off him and hopped out of bed. He scrambled for his clothing, knowing that no matter how good his excuse, if he missed their breakfast date after basically kicking the man out the night before, it would destroy the shaky connection they’d made. He grabbed his Nextel as he shrugged into a clean flannel shirt and beeped the number labeled ‘Bossman.’ “Boss?” he said into the walkie talkie in a hoarse, still sleep-laden voice. In the trailer on the lot, Lucas had tossed and turned on the cot, dozing uneasily all night, afraid he wouldn’t wake up on time despite setting the alarm clock, his cell phone alarm and the one on his watch in consecutive ten-minute increments. But he was up at the first blare, already shaking with nerves. He ducked into the shower, cleaned up, got dressed and was sitting at his desk, leg bouncing like crazy. It was just about quarter ’til, and it would only take him five minutes to get there. So Lucas was trying to focus on a random supply order when his phone chirped, and when he heard Cooper’s voice – sleepy and rough – he jumped so badly that his heart about pounded out of his chest. He scrambled up to grab it off the table by the door, thinking that Cooper was likely canceling. He sounded really tired. Stomach roiling, he stared at the phone, unable to push the button for fear of the crushing disappointment. “Boss?” Cooper repeated after clearing his throat. “Lucas, you there?” he asked in a slightly sluggish voice as he stepped into his work boots and bent to tie them, holding the phone between his cheek and shoulder. “I’m running late,” he went on, clearing his throat again as he moved to the other boot. “My alarm went on strike,” he offered. “Herd of chickens sitting in my truck,” he tried with a small smile. “Would you believe an earthquake swallowed up my driveway?” he went on nervously as he waited for Lucas to respond. Lucas stared at the phone, listening more to Cooper’s voice, his gorgeous, sleepy, warm voice, than to the words. Then he blinked and pushed the button. His own voice was rough, too. “Herd of chickens?” he asked incredulously.
Under Contract | 61 “What?” Cooper responded defensively, relief flooding him as Lucas finally answered. “It could happen,” he mumbled with a small smile, surprised at how glad he was just to hear the other man’s voice. He stood and began making his way to the door. “Dog ate my tires?” he offered with a smirk. “That work better?” Lucas couldn’t help but snicker. He pushed the button again. “The earthquake is more believable, Cooper,” he said, relaxing a bit and leaning against the wall, smile appearing. Cooper sighed in relief. “I’m sorry,” he offered sincerely, wondering if he’d ever be able to stop saying that. “I’ll be there in about ten minutes, I promise.” Relaxing, Lucas nodded, then shook himself. “Okay,” he said good-naturedly. He was feeling a little better, although he still had butterflies in his stomach. “Mind if I go ahead and order coffee? I figure you’ll want to talk to a human when you get there.” “Hey, it’ll beat the chickens,” Cooper snickered, biting his lip as he slid into his truck, still half asleep. He wanted to say more, to say something about last night. But he kept quiet, hoping he’d get another chance. A better chance. Lucas leaned his head against the wall, wishing he could reach out and touch Cooper, to connect with that gorgeous voice he was very afraid that he was badly hooked on. “Okay,” he said, relieved that the other man was still coming to meet him. Cooper closed the connection and clipped his phone back into his belt as he cranked the truck and headed out. His stomach flipped nervously, and he chastised himself for behaving like a fucking teenager. He had to keep reminding himself that Lucas was likely to burn out his interest after a few rolls in the sheets. Every other time Cooper had heard ‘I love you’ so quickly, that had been the case. It didn’t bother him much. Hell, he liked sex as much as the next guy. But he had to be damn careful not to fall for the man. Ted Lucas, he’d realized last night, would be so very easy to fall for. Seven minutes later he was pulling into the parking lot of Denny’s. Three minutes faster than usual. The only patrons at this time of morning
62 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux were normally cops and construction workers. Luckily, none of his crew was here to see him sharing an unusual breakfast with their foreman. Sitting inside the somewhat busy restaurant at a big table so he could stretch out his legs, Lucas was on his second cup of coffee and feeling a little more awake. In a pitiful way, he was glad Cooper hadn’t seen him first thing in the morning. He hadn’t been kidding about being a bear – not to mention the scruffy face, blond curls that stuck up all over and him being clumsy as hell as he tried to make his long body wake up enough to walk reliably. As he sipped the coffee, his hand was clutching and squeezing a roll of silverware. His nerves had come back full force as he waited. Would they talk about work, being out in public like this? What else could they talk about? Like Cooper had said last night, they hardly knew anything about each other. Cooper tied his hair back as he walked toward the restaurant, surprised to find his hands shaking slightly. It wasn’t from nerves, obviously. That would be silly. It had to be from lack of sleep. Yeah. Exhaustion. This didn’t feel like a date, no sir. He stepped inside and glanced around, catching sight of Lucas and smiling at the man as he headed over to the table. “Morning,” he greeted in a gruff voice as he slid into the chair beside him and leaned forward. He didn’t kiss him, though that was, oddly enough, his first impulse. Instead he smiled sleepily and knocked his knee against Lucas’s under the table. “You look like you slept as well as I did.” The discreet touch of their knees made Lucas smile, and he took a few seconds to wonder at how soft and sleepy Cooper looked. Gorgeous. Then he shook himself. “For crap?” he asked with a snort, waving his hand at the waitress so Cooper could order. Cooper picked up a menu and held it up as the waitress started over. “I love this place,” he crooned as he pointed at a picture on the menu for the waitress before she even got to the table. “Don’t even have to be coherent enough to form words or read in order to get fed,” he beamed as the waitress rolled her eyes. Lucas chuckled. He’d had to look for five minutes to decide because he’d only eaten here maybe twice in a year’s time. “Coffee?” he
Under Contract | 63 asked, having gotten two mugs and a carafe just in case. He had no idea what else to say. “Just juice.” As the waitress left, Cooper grinned and looked over at the man with eyes that sparkled even with the early morning haze. “Hey,” he murmured as he leaned closer. “I didn’t handle last night very well,” he said softly. A flush of warmth coursed through Lucas, and he swallowed carefully, setting down the mug. He could interpret that two ways, he knew, and he really wanted to be positive about it. “You take care of the guys. I appreciate it,” he replied, sliding the mug back and forth. “That’s not who I wanted to be taking care of last night,” Cooper whispered in response, the words caused by the giddy feeling of not enough sleep and an early morning meeting with the man with whom he had been so shamefully brazen last night. Lucas’s smile just glowed before he reined it in, but his cheeks were still flushed. “I know the feeling,” he murmured as he took in the other man’s looks, swallowing hard as his gut clenched. He inhaled sharply, reminding himself that they were out in public. “Depending on how today goes, what do you think about dinner?” Cooper asked before he could allow himself to stop the question. “I’ll even turn my phone off,” he offered conspiratorially as the waitress brought his juice. Biting his bottom lip, Lucas waited until the waitress was out of earshot again. He shifted in his chair to lean his elbows on the table, mug wrapped with both hands. “I’d like that,” he said, trying really hard to suppress the urge to smile like a crazy man as he looked at the wall across the room. “Good,” Cooper murmured as he leaned back again. He rolled his head from side to side, producing a few satisfying pops from his neck that had him groaning softly as he leaned back in his chair. “Let’s just hope it’s a quick day,” he moaned as he closed his eyes and sighed. Lucas took the opportunity to look over him intently before sitting back and taking another drink of coffee. He quietly agreed with Cooper. A quick, bother-free day would be perfect.
64 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux
“SANDERS! Get your ass off that damn roof!” Lucas roared. Two other men grabbed Sanders and hustled him off to the manual lift as Lucas just groaned and rubbed his eyes. Perfect day, his ass. First thing, the supply shipment came in wrong, which held up some work. Three employees called in and the temp pool was empty. They’d gotten a bad batch of concrete that wouldn’t set, so it had to be removed and trashed. And the same piping that had tumbled to the ground yesterday had sprung a bunch of leaks once hooked up to the water system. Sanders on the roof was just one more disaster. And it was just now noon. Cooper heard the roar of an irate foreman and groaned softly. The last thing they needed today was another problem. He looked up from the blueprint he was examining and peered into the noonday sun. “Hey Coop, when’s lunch break, huh?” a voice asked him testily. “When I fucking tell you,” Cooper barked in answer. “Get back to work and start getting something done, then you fucking eat,” he snapped at the men around him, who all scattered back to their various jobs. His phone beeped at him, and he punched the button. “What?” “Delivery at the gates, Coop.” “Well, let them the fuck in, Travis,” Cooper shot back as he placed the blueprints down once more and rubbed his eyes. He didn’t know quite why he was so annoyed, but he doubted there was a single man on the lot who he hadn’t shouted at today. And it was only noon. He hated these damn blueprints. It was Lucas’s area. He should be out here interpreting them. Finishing his bickering with the concrete guys with only a little yelling, Lucas stalked back to the trailer. The workers were giving him a wide berth, especially when he stopped in place and his back stiffened as he heard another crash. Everything went silent. Lucas just closed his eyes and started walking again. If he went back there to investigate, he was going to rip someone’s balls off. Cooper would handle it. He clomped up the stairs and slammed through the door, the silence outside holding until he was inside. He pulled off his hardhat and
Under Contract | 65 threw it across the trailer with a bang as the shouts began, then headed to the bathroom to start washing the mealy concrete off his hands and arms. A long minute of scrubbing later, the thudding of boots on the steps signaled someone running up to the trailer, and a frantic banging in the door was accompanied by a call of “Boss! We need the first aid kit! And call an ambulance!” Lucas’s head snapped up, and he smacked the faucet to turn off the water. He was in the front room grabbing the large first aid kit before he even thought about drying his hands, and he was out the door without bothering to find his hard hat. The worker was dancing in agitation as he waited for the foreman, and when Lucas hit the top step he took off running to lead the man to the pile of spilled metal piping. The truck that delivered them had parked in the wrong spot, on a slight incline that caused the load to shift just enough to unbalance the entire shipment of heavy pipes. One large casing was not heavy enough to hurt someone all that much when it fell on them, unless it hit them from above. But several dozen rolling off the back of a large truck had been enough to knock the man flat and completely cover him after he released the back latch on the tailgate. They’d tumbled out in a horrifying parody of some Wile E. Coyote cartoon, and the man hadn’t even been able to shout for help before he’d been knocked over, the runner explained hurriedly. All that could be seen as evidence that there was even a man underneath the pile of dirty white pipes was his hard hat, spinning on the ground several feet away. “Hell,” Lucas breathed. “Travis!” he yelled, pointing right at the younger man. “Get in the trailer and call 911. Now!” As Travis ran off, he looked around at the milling men, many staring in shocked horror, others already trying to get to the top pipes without stepping on the pile below. “Two men on each pipe. Pick them up – carefully – some of you get over there and hold them so they don’t shift anymore. Move!” The men scrambled over and started lifting the pipes. Lucas was pointing out which ones to move, directing them to lift the pipes the furthest away from the truck first, that’s where the man’s head would be. “Careful – careful! Billy, hold that one that’s shifting….”
66 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux As more pipes were moved, more body became visible, and Lucas realized he was holding his breath and his heart was pounding so hard he thought he might have a heart attack. Despite his gruff exterior, he knew every man on this site. And what if it was… he clamped down on the thought and kept moving pipes. Shit, he would be here, wouldn’t he? Cooper would have been the first one here, digging his man out. The men moved the pipes slowly, terrified of destabilizing the entire mess and causing more damage. They all knew the man under the pile. They all adored him. And not a heart on the lot was beating at normal speed as they tried to get down to him. When a sprawled arm in a worn flannel shirt was uncovered, Lucas thought he might be sick right then and there. It was Cooper. Oh, Jesus Christ. It was Nick. He bit his lip on the urge to snap at the guys to move faster. They had to be careful. Had to be. As more of Cooper’s body was uncovered, Lucas started shaking. No blood, he didn’t see any blood. But he was still worried sick; Cooper had been hit hard enough that his hard hat went flying, and he landed on large-chunk gravel. More pipes were moved, and the guys sped up, frantic to uncover the assistant foreman. Lucas could hear the siren in the distance. He knelt down and shoved the two pipes over Cooper’s head to the side, seeing with relief that he’d thrown his other arm over his face and head, trying to protect himself. “Corey, open the kit and give me some of those sterile cloths,” he said shakily. Cooper had a bloody nose and lips, probably took a hit right in the teeth while trying to cover his head. Cooper groaned softly as the pressure lifted from his chest and head. He tried to force his eyes open to investigate the cool touch to his face, and finally glazed eyes blinked open slowly and looked up into the blue sky. “Ow,” he muttered plaintively. Blinking, Lucas moved to shield Cooper’s eyes from the sun. “Don’t move, Cooper,” he said, voice cracking. “Not even your arms or head or neck, okay? We’ve got to get you checked out.” He carefully dabbed at the blood, clearing off the lips he’d much rather have seen swollen from kissing than from this. The foreman glanced up, seeing everyone milling around. They knew better than to crowd an injured man or get in the way of the EMTs,
Under Contract | 67 but they just couldn’t seem to leave. “Guys, back off. Get that pipe out of here so the ambulance can move in,” he said quietly, his voice carrying with firm authority. He rarely used it like that, preferring to work off steam with the yelling, but he just couldn’t yell right now. “Travis, go meet the ambulance at the gate,” he instructed. The men jumped to work, clearing away from the two men in the gravel. Shifting the cloth to Cooper’s nose, he wiped carefully. “Fuck, Nick,” he swore under his breath. “What were you thinking?” Cooper’s face burned with a flush of embarrassment, but it faded quickly under the pain in his head. “Was thinking… unload the truck,” he answered candidly, his voice rough and slurring as he closed his eyes again. “Think my leg is gone, boss,” he added as if it were an afterthought. Lucas flinched and glanced down Cooper’s body, swallowing hard. His right leg looked fine, but the left…. “It’s still attached, if that’s what you’re wondering,” he said, fighting back the upset. “C’mon, keep your eyes open. You’ve almost certainly got a concussion. Everything else looks okay, but for the leg. Didn’t even break your nose,” he said, trying to inject some levity into the conversation. “I killed our record,” Cooper muttered, referring to the recordbreaking number of consecutive days without injuries the build had been enjoying. Choking on a bark of near-hysterical laughter, Lucas shook his head in disbelief. “Fuck the record,” he answered in a harsh whisper. He glanced up when the siren got louder, and he heard the gravel crunch as it entered the lot. “Anyone I should call? Is it on your personnel sheet?” “No one. Just tell the boys you called my girlfriend,” Cooper answered with a ghost of a smile. He swallowed with difficulty as his eyes drifted shut against his will. The shock was wearing off, and the pain from his leg was beginning to creep in. “May need a rain check for tonight,” he muttered drowsily. “Shit,” Lucas muttered, seeing Cooper’s eyes close. “Nick, stay with me, please,” he begged as the ambulance stopped nearby and he
68 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux heard the doors open. “Open those gorgeous eyes,” he added softly. “Please.” Cooper forced his eyes open and blinked up at the man, more from the desire to see the eyes behind that odd tone of voice than any force of will. “Sorry,” he slurred softly. “Don’t leave,” he requested disjointedly even as his eyes fell closed once more. Lucas was about to plead with him again when the EMTs got there, and he moved back at their instructions. Another pulled him aside and asked for details, as many as he could give. He kept glancing over at Cooper, lying there in the gravel, and his gut just churned. When the EMT asked if there was anyone to call, Lucas shook his head and said he’d follow them to the hospital. She nodded, and just like that, they had Cooper on a stretcher. Lucas caught Cooper’s hand. “I’ll see you at the hospital,” he said, hoping to reassure him. Cooper’s fingers clutched briefly at the hand, and then he was fading again. The pain was constant now, his entire body throbbing along with his leg, and the EMT hooked him up to an IV that sent cold through him. “Tell him,” he muttered to the EMT as they lifted him into the ambulance. “Tell him to let them go to lunch.” The EMT passed on the message, chuckling when Lucas could only laugh in pained relief. She paused and asked if he was okay, looking over him for signs of shock. Lucas insisted he was fine, so she nodded and then the ambulance was gone. He turned and looked at the work site, the pipes neatly stacked and the guys milling about restlessly, all looking shaken and worried. He strode over to them. “Okay, guys, Cooper’s going to be fine. But there will be a shit storm tomorrow, investigation and all that, with the damn OSHA people. Go ahead home now, probably the next two days while they’re here. I’ll call you,” he said. Corey and Billy came up to ask a few questions while the guys trudged off in twos and threes, and once he finished talking to them, Lucas headed back to the trailer. He closed the door carefully behind him, and before he knew it his shaky legs gave out and he sank to the floor, wrapping his arms around himself as he shivered.
Under Contract | 69
COOPER blinked his eyes open slowly, his blurry vision finally settling on the sterile white ceiling above him. He was aware enough to know that he was in the hospital. He remembered being told he had a concussion, and that his leg was broken in two places. It didn’t feel like he had a cast on, and he wondered if he had to have surgery on it first. A brief panic flooded him, and he tried to sit up. Having stared at the wall for the better part of two hours, Lucas’s head flew up as he heard Cooper move. “Hey, take it easy,” he urged, standing and moving to the bedside, lightly pressing on Cooper’s shoulder. “Just lay back. Everything’s fine.” “What… ow,” Cooper groaned as he lay back slowly. “Owwwww,” he moaned softly as he closed his eyes again. Lucas reached over and threaded his fingers into Cooper’s, pulling open his fist. “Boss?” Cooper muttered blearily. “Yeah,” Lucas murmured. “What’s the verdict?” Cooper asked as he forced his eyes open again. “Broken leg, two places. They put a pin in. Not serious enough for a plate, not a compound fracture,” Lucas said, trying not to let his voice shake. “Four cracked ribs and a hell of a lot of bruising. You’re going to be hurting for awhile.” He squeezed Cooper’s hand slightly. “Damn it!” Cooper hissed in frustration. Lucas jerked back a little bit in surprise. “Nick, calm down,” he insisted. “How the hell am I supposed to work like this?” Cooper asked, his tone almost desperate as his grip tightened involuntarily on Lucas’s hand. “You’re not!” Lucas insisted. “What are you worried about? It’s all covered under workers’ comp, you won’t miss a dime. And you won’t have to listen to me yell, that’s got to be an incentive,” he added. Cooper turned his head away and closed his eyes. “Work’s all I’ve got,” he murmured sadly. Silenced by more surprise, Lucas remembered Cooper had told him he didn’t have anyone to call, not even that nonexistent girlfriend.
70 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux And if he couldn’t work, he couldn’t very well work on his house, either. An idea popped into his head. “I can give you some work to do on the sly,” he offered. “Stuff you’d have no problem doing in bed.” His mouth snapped shut, then reopened. “Uh. I mean, while sitting.” Cooper turned his head again and huffed a laugh, wincing. “Now you’re just looking for someone to do your paperwork,” he accused with a small smile. Lucas shuffled a little. “Well, it’s work,” he said innocently, raising one shoulder. Then he added quietly, “Would give me a reason to come out and see you during the day.” Cooper nodded at his foreman, guilt and panic warring within him. Another sleepless night and another stupid mistake, and he was in a hospital bed with months of loneliness stretching out in front of him. “Oh God,” he breathed as he closed his eyes again. “I’ll go crazy out there all alone.” “Damn,” Lucas responded under his breath, not having thought about that. It was going to be hell for Cooper to get around at that house, although the only steps were at the front door. He wracked his mind, trying to think of a solution. “Do you know any of the guys well enough that they’d stay with you for a while?” Cooper laughed suddenly, wincing again at the pain. “What did I ever do to you to wish that on me?” he teased weakly. Lucas snorted, then grew serious as another idea popped into his head. It was crazy, and way the hell out of bounds, but…. “What about me?” he asked, holding his breath. Cooper focused a little harder and blinked up at him. “What about you?” he echoed. “What? You mean, staying with me?” Blinking several times, Lucas scrambled to cover nervously. “Or the company would cover a nurse, I’m sure,” he hurried to add, starting to ramble over his suggestion. “Maybe you’ve got some extended family who could fly in, covered by the extra disability payments? I’m sure you could get the physical therapist to go there instead of you coming here.” Cooper squeezed the man’s hand to quiet him and closed his eyes. He was tired, which he suspected had something to do with the drugs, but
Under Contract | 71 he forced his eyes open and smiled slightly. “I get the left side of the bed,” he declared, hazy eyes beginning to sparkle once more even then. Lucas stopped mid-sentence and smiled tremulously. “You can have whatever you want,” he declared quietly, moved too much to resist leaning over and kissing his forehead lightly, then pressing his cheek there for a long moment. “You scared the shit out of me,” he rasped. “I’m sorry,” Cooper offered sincerely, closing his eyes and basking in the contact of the rough cheek against his forehead. He didn’t want to tell the other man that the first thought he’d had when he had seen that tie snap and those pipes begin rolling toward him had involved his boss. He didn’t want to tell him that his first thought was regret that he wouldn’t make dinner. He feared it would sound contrived. He slid his hand up and behind Lucas’s head and threaded his fingers into the man’s unruly curls. “I’m glad you’re here,” he whispered, every ounce of it true. He had no one else, and though he counted many among his friends, there were few he wanted to spend more than a few hours with at a time. Shoulders sagging, Lucas kissed his brow again. “Me, too,” he whispered, sliding one hand under Cooper’s chin to cup his other cheek, holding him the only way he could right now. Cooper closed his eyes and inhaled the man’s scent, wincing as his ribs ached. “Damn, I wish we’d fucked a few more times last night,” he bemoaned suddenly. “It’s going to be… days!” he moaned pitifully as his hand tightened in Lucas’s hair. Snorting, Lucas couldn’t hold back the bubbling laughter. “Guess I know what’s on your list of important things to do,” he joked. “Days. Awwww,” he teased, staying close. Cooper groaned again plaintively and turned his head into Lucas’s, then kissed him impulsively. Sighing against Cooper’s lips, Lucas kissed him back, letting out some of the worry and upset before he pulled back, eyes shifting to where the curtain barely blocked the door. He slid his fingers through the long, dark hair that trailed over Cooper’s shoulder. “Did I ever tell you I love your hair?” he murmured as he shifted to prop his elbow on the bed where he leaned over. Cooper smiled sleepily and shook his head.
72 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux “Hang on,” Lucas said, straightening and stretching until his back popped. Then he grabbed the chair and pulled it over so he could sit close by, resting both arms on the bed. He propped his chin on his forearm as he went back to stroking the dark hair. “Yeah. First several times we met, I didn’t notice it, tucked up in your hard hat. Then one day I saw you at lunch with some of the guys. It was windy that day, and it kept flying back, floating around. You kept pushing it out of your face,” he related quietly. “That was before I was secure enough in my manhood to wear pigtails,” Cooper joked, warmth spreading through his body at the realization that Lucas truly had been paying attention to him nearly from the start. Maybe when he said he loved him he actually knew what he was talking about. Then again, maybe it was just painkillers. Smiling softly, Lucas tilted his head a little as he watched the other man. “Yeah, then I started looking for it. You pull the tail out of your collar, you know, when you’re talking to the guys or working on blueprints. You hold it out of the way at the water cooler.” “No wonder you get no work done,” Cooper laughed softly. Lucas snickered and lightly pulled on a lock gently. “You caught me,” he said, voice lighter. “I’ve caught you before,” Cooper told him softly. “Caught you watching me. That white hard hat is hard to miss when you’re as tall as you are,” he slurred affectionately. “I always thought it was because you didn’t trust me,” he admitted. “Hell. I’m sorry,” Lucas said quietly, but fervently. “It’s okay,” Cooper huffed. “I wish I’d known earlier. We could have had a lot of nights like last night,” he laughed. Lucas closed his eyes on a sigh as his fingers tightened slightly in Cooper’s hair. “Don’t know if I could have said anything earlier,” he whispered. “No?” Cooper asked slowly, fighting the sleepiness desperately now. “I… I was scared shitless,” Lucas admitted. “That you’d laugh. That you’d beat the shit out of me. Leave the job.”
Under Contract | 73 “Must have thought you were in love with a real bastard, huh?” Cooper asked sadly. Head snapping up, Lucas shook his head. “Not at all. Just didn’t know if you’d be at all receptive. I guess I’m paranoid about it. I was outed at a work site once. Wasn’t pretty.” “Really?” Cooper asked softly, watching the other man intently. “I didn’t mean… I mean….” He cleared his throat, shutting his eyes and sighing. “What happened?” Lucas sighed. “Couple of guys from the site got drunk as hell one night, came over to my apartment looking for more beer. Saw me come home with my partner. They ended up sleeping off the drunk in their car and saw that he didn’t leave until morning. I made the mistake of kissing him goodbye just inside the door.” “That why you came here?” Cooper asked, telling himself not to ask about the friend. “And the friend?” he asked anyway. “Moved to the West Coast, got a great job,” Lucas answered about Randy, figuring the answer to the first question was obvious. Cooper looked up at him silently for a moment, eyes traveling over his features intently. “You think this crew would be the same?” he asked curiously. “If they found out?” Lucas considered for a few moments. “Don’t know. Some of the guys seem pretty open to alternatives, but that doesn’t always mean that they’ll be tolerant. They are a better group overall, even with Sanders passing out all the time.” Cooper laughed and grimaced. “I would love....” He trailed off and shook his head, listening to the rhythmic beeping of the monitoring machines. “I’d love to be able to tell the truth,” he stated softly, eyes unfocusing briefly before he glanced at Lucas again. “We risk a lot, you staying with me. We risk getting caught.” Eyes closing for a full minute, the implications rushed through Lucas’s head. He reopened his eyes to look at Cooper. “What with your leg, I’m thinking we’d be okay ’til this job finishes out. After that….” He shrugged, taking up Cooper’s hand and pressing his lips to bruised knuckles. “I think it would be worth it,” he said. “I’m willing.”
74 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux Cooper watched the foreman carefully. “I snore,” he blurted in warning. “And I drink beer before noon and on Sundays. And I get very cranky when I can’t do things myself so I make a horrible patient. And I have to watch baseball at night or I go into convulsions.” Smile almost splitting his face, Lucas sat up. “Is that all? I happen to like baseball,” he said mock defensively. “Tight pants,” he added with a wink. “My kind of guy,” Cooper snickered. “You should know what you’re getting into,” he continued. “I have to have all my coffee mug handles pointing the same way, even though I don’t drink coffee,” he went on, as if he didn’t want Lucas to discover these little things later and be driven away by them. “I can’t stand silence so I hum if there’s nothing else to make noise. And I don’t really sleep on the left side of the bed. That was a line to try to get you to come home with me,” he admitted. “I sleep in the middle. And if there’s someone in my way, I sleep on top of them.” Lucas tilted his head, smile now just pulling at the corners of his mouth as he sat there with both hands wrapped around Cooper’s fist. “You’ll have to come up with more than that if you’re trying to scare me off,” he commented. “You sleeping on top of me would be no kind of hardship.” He shrugged. “The rest doesn’t matter. I’m at least as bad, if not worse, probably.” Cooper smiled softly. “Last night I didn’t believe you,” he murmured, feeling giddy from the morphine drip and the warmth of Lucas’s hands. He felt the need to clear every bit of the air between them. “I thought you were wrong, that you were just… it was just a crush or something. I thought… I thought if I took you home it would – you would burn it out of your system,” he admitted with a flush. “I expected it to be a one-night thing. I didn’t….” Not surprised, Lucas just listened, detecting the meaning behind Cooper’s words. “Didn’t?” he prompted when the words trailed off. “I didn’t expect you to want more,” Cooper admitted with a flush of shame. “And I was okay with that. I just wanted warmth in my bed for the night.”
Under Contract | 75 Watching Cooper’s cheeks and neck go red, Lucas had to admit he was more charmed than put off by the comment. “Warmth, huh?” Lucas said. “I would have been happy to provide. I didn’t really want to go home. Didn’t, in fact.” “You didn’t?” Cooper asked in dazed confusion. “I wish you’d said something,” he breathed. “I wish I’d said something,” he laughed. “I wanted you.” He trailed off, deciding that leaving it there would suffice. “But it took me hours with Travis. I got home, and I was so pissed. I wouldn’t have been good company.” Lucas’s lips twitched. “That would have been fine. I could have… held you, at least,” he said in a bare whisper, his expression longing. Cooper swallowed heavily and nodded, not voicing the useless desire to go back and change things. “When can I be released?” he asked instead. Blinking several times to focus on the new question, Lucas cleared his throat. “Doc said tomorrow afternoon if the stitches look good. Can’t walk on it for at least three weeks, though. Maybe longer.” He chuckled. “It’s the chair for you, young man,” he said sternly. “I was just wondering,” Cooper murmured seriously, “when you’d get a chance to hold me.” Lucas pressed his lips together and reached out to lightly touch Cooper’s bottom lip with his fingertips. “Soon,” he said. “Now rest. You’re struggling to stay awake. I’m not going anywhere.” To prove his point, he wrapped both his hands around Cooper’s again. Cooper flexed his fingers and curled them over one of Lucas’s hands. “Thank you,” he murmured sleepily. “Thank you for being here.” Watching the other man doze, Lucas murmured, “Anytime you need. Anytime you want.”
THE next afternoon, the doctor stood at Cooper’s bedside going down the grocery list of do’s and don’ts, which Lucas was completely convinced was the last thing on Cooper’s mind. He was absolutely quivering with the desire to get out of the hospital. He certainly didn’t hold still well.
76 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux Lucas stifled a laugh as the doctor gave his patient a dirty look and turned to him instead, asking Lucas to take care of the list. The foreman assured him that he would, and with one last nod to Cooper, the doctor was out the door. “A little excited, are you?” he asked Cooper wryly. “I got to get out of here, boss,” Cooper growled desperately. He’d sat through getting a cast the day before, and he couldn’t stand to be here any longer. “Just grab that morphine drip, and we’ll be on our way,” he ordered haughtily with a wave of his hand. Lucas laughed. “The morphine stays, I’m afraid. Time to change over to something you sip out of a spoon, the nurse said. That ought to taste lovely,” he poked. Cooper grabbed at Lucas’s hand and brought it to his lips impulsively. “When we get home,” he growled, not even thinking about the effect the words ‘we’ and ‘home’ would have on Lucas. “I’m going to whack you with my crutches,” he promised. Warmed by the gesture and heated by the words, Lucas still laughed openly as the zip of electricity shot through him. “You think you’re getting crutches.” He shook his head and laughed again. “Dream on, big boy. Three weeks, the doctor said, if you’d been listening.” Cooper groaned plaintively and reached up to wrap his arm round Lucas’s neck. He held to the man tightly and let himself be helped to his feet. “Wow, that hurts a little,” he breathed in a strained voice. Lucas rolled his eyes and slid his arm around Cooper’s waist, practically picking him up. “Careful now,” he said as he turned them so Cooper could sit in the wheelchair. Cooper eased himself down and looked up at Lucas pitifully. He was trying his best not to show the pain, but he doubted he could do that for very long. He just wanted to live up to the man’s opinion of him. Squatting down next to him, Lucas set a hand on Cooper’s good knee. “I know it hurts like hell. I’m not going to think any worse of you for the odd curse here and there, you know?” He smiled tentatively, waiting for Cooper’s reply.
Under Contract | 77 Cooper smiled sideways at the man and nodded. offered feelingly.
“Fuck,” he
Lucas grinned and laughed, patting Cooper’s knee. “Taking it like a man,” he commented humorously. “I’ve been known to do that,” Cooper responded with a small, suggestive smile. “On my knees, usually.” Brows flying up, Lucas snorted as the nurse came around the curtain. He stood up and out of the way, but not before lightly squeezing Cooper’s shoulder. The nurse was reemphasizing the list, which Lucas pulled out of his pocket and waved at her. She could tell Cooper was ready, so she called for the stocky orderly to come push the wheelchair. Cooper growled and grumbled quietly as he was pushed, trying his best not to complain on the way out of the hospital. He wanted to be at home. In his own bed. Preferably with Lucas in the bed with him, holding him, possibly doing more interesting things to him. Lucas jogged out into the parking lot, leaving a muttering Cooper with the orderly. He climbed into the truck, already having pulled the front seat back as far as it would go. He’d checked it out. Even he could stretch his legs out totally, so there should be plenty of room. Within a couple of minutes he was under the awning and climbing out of the truck. Cooper blushed as he was helped into the front of the truck by the orderly and his boss. He sat in the front of the cab with his head down, sighing heavily and throbbing with dull pain. After buckling the man’s seatbelt, Lucas thanked the orderly and climbed into the driver’s side. “You’ll be happy to know that I took possession of your keys after we got your truck home,” he said, reaching into the cup holder and holding them up, jingling them. He put the truck into drive and they were off. Cooper smiled and watched the keys as Lucas replaced them. Lucas figured it would take about thirty minutes to get to Cooper’s house. The hospital was across town from the work site, and Cooper didn’t live too far from there. “When we get home,” Cooper muttered, “I need one of two things, okay? I either need a drink or I need to crawl into bed and let you have your way with me. Both is a definite option. One or the other is critical.”
78 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux Lucas chuckled again. “Well, the drink isn’t going to happen, except a drink of the painkillers they gave me at the hospital pharmacy. The other, we’ll just have to see what I can do to take your mind off your leg.” He glanced over, privately thinking that Cooper would be asleep once he hit the pillow, if not before. Cooper stared out the windshield blankly as the truck made its way to his house. He was still heavily drugged, and even though he managed spurts of liveliness and actually coherent speech, he was more apt to just sit and stare. Slowly he slid his hand across the console between them and threaded his fingers through Lucas’s, his eyes glazed and his body otherwise relaxed and still. With his ribs like they were, Cooper didn’t foresee any sort of activity happening willingly, no matter how much he may have wanted it. It was going to be a long few weeks. Day 17
LUCAS got back from the site a little after lunch, a heavy box of paperwork coming with him. For almost three weeks now, he’d been going in at 5 a.m., then turning the site over to Billy around 2 p.m. It was working out so far, and if Billy kept up the good work, Lucas had decided to recommend him for an assistant foreman’s job with the company. Now he parked the truck, grabbed the box and headed up the front steps, wondering what kind of mood Cooper would be in today. Cranky was a sure thing. Spunky, too. Cheeky, to boot. He’d slept most of the first week; the second he’d slept and watched TV, basically too tired and still too drugged to do much. But on Day 14, the drug regimen was cut back. And Lord, Cooper’s personality had come back with a vengeance. He was a stubborn bastard once you got right down to it. Lucas opened the door and stepped inside. He quashed the desire to call out ‘Honey, I’m home!’, instead dropping the box on the kitchen table and starting to wander, looking for Wheelie, as he’d nicknamed Cooper once he’d gotten the hang of his wheelchair the end of Week 1.
Under Contract | 79 He was sure the man hated it, but it tickled Lucas too much to stop using it. “Wheelie?” he called out, not seeing him in the living room. Cooper growled in response from where he lay on the couch. Other than that, he didn’t bother moving. His wheelchair sat at the end of the hall, where he had left it when he decided to try and test his crutches finally. One crutch lay in the living room floor where he had dropped it and been unable to bend over to pick it up. The other crutch he held tightly to his chest as he lay on the couch, unwilling to part with it even to the extent of setting it down. Hearing a rough sound, Lucas was alarmed at first when he saw the crutch on the floor. He grabbed it and walked farther into the living room, sighing in relief when he saw Cooper on the couch. He sat down on the coffee table in front of him. “So. Practicing?” he asked seriously. No way was he going to tease with that look on the man’s face. “I was doing okay ’til I hit the old floorboards,” Cooper muttered. “They’re higher than the new ones. I never noticed that,” he said thoughtfully. “You’d think whoever added that part on would have noticed that.” Lucas nodded, tilting his head. Cooper looked perturbed and a little out of it, not that those conditions were unusual for the last few days. He propped the crutch carefully against the arm of the sofa and observed the way Cooper curled around its mate protectively. “Can I get you anything?” he asked, trying to hide his amusement. “Drink? Snack? TV remote?” Cooper blinked at the man tiredly and shook his head. “I couldn’t even walk down the hall without needing to sit,” he muttered in despair. “I need a nap, boss,” he groaned plaintively. “So, take a nap,” Lucas said soothingly, grabbing the pillow from the nearby chair and sliding it carefully under Cooper’s head. Without a thought, he leaned over and pressed a kiss to his forehead, then smoothed his hair. “Ugh,” Cooper responded in disgust even as he nuzzled up into the kiss. “That’s not the point, shithead,” he added as he reached out and twirled his finger through Lucas’s hair.
80 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux Lucas chuckled at the impromptu nickname. He’d wondered how long it would be before Cooper started woefully missing the sex he’d wanted even in the hospital. Not that he minded. He’d wanted Cooper ever since that day as well. And since coming home – to Cooper’s house, he corrected – Lucas had refused to sleep in the bed with him, scared to death that he’d kick his leg or push him out of the bed or something. “Something I can do to help you rest easier?” he drawled, sliding his hand over Cooper’s chest and down to his belly. Cooper groaned plaintively again and dug his fingers into the back of Lucas’s neck to tug him closer. He kissed him as he pulled him down carefully. “I need… I need to go outside,” he muttered against Lucas’s lips before kissing him again, this time in a manner that was almost seductive. “I want to go sit on the deck,” he purred with another kiss as his hands drifted down the man’s body. “I want to go sit on the deck and drink beer!” Snorting and sitting up, Lucas laughed outright. “I suppose I can take care of that,” he said. “You’ll be looped as hell, beer on top of the Vicodin, but you’re only taking a couple a day, so it should be okay.” “Damn straight,” Cooper responded excitedly. He couldn’t sit up without some serious effort, but he practically vibrated with anticipation as he lay there. He wanted to breathe fresh air, and he wanted it now! He wanted to sit on his deck! Grinning, Lucas stood up. “Hold your horses. I’ll be right back.” He headed into Cooper’s bedroom and got the chair, wheeling it out to the couch. “Give me a few minutes to arrange things.” Pulling open the French doors, Lucas walked out and dragged the table out of the way so Cooper could get out there, shifting the chairs to the railing. Now he could sit at the table with his leg extended and have his beer. He stepped back inside. “Okay, Wheelie, you ready?” he asked, pulling a couple of beers out of the fridge. Cooper muttered and glared at the man. “Ready when you are, Quickdraw,” he shot back. Lucas rolled his eyes and stood just outside the door, waving the cans. “Who’s got the beer?” he taunted.
Under Contract | 81 “What am I supposed to do, crawl over there?” Cooper asked testily. “Come here and I’ll grope you a little as you help me up,” he offered cheekily. “Awww. I didn’t realize you’d broken your arms, too. What do I get if I help you, besides a sore back?” Lucas teased. Cooper pursed his lips thoughtfully. myself?” he asked shrewdly.
“You want me to do it
Lucas leaned in the doorway. The chair was clamped down good, right next to the couch, and the nurse he’d been talking with every other day said he should encourage Cooper to do for himself, if possible. The sooner the better. “How about I tempt you with a reward?” he purred, waving the can of beer through the air. Cooper snarled and deflated on the couch. With a huff he began to push himself to a sitting position and swung his legs off the couch. He sat there, back ramrod straight as his ribs protested, and finally he looked up at Lucas triumphantly and levered himself to his feet. It was all Lucas could do not to rush over and try to help, to wrap Cooper up in his arms and soothe the pain away. Instead…. ‘Tough love,’ the nurse had said. ‘He’s strong. He can do it. Don’t baby him. At least not until after he’s done what you want.’ So Lucas stood there, faking relaxation and nonchalance, praying frantically that Cooper wouldn’t fall over. His leg throbbed and his ribs ached as he stood there, but Cooper turned slowly without allowing himself to display the pain he was in, and eased carefully into the wheelchair. He breathed out slowly and reached one arm down to unlock the brake, wheeling himself over the hardwoods floors easily. “Heh,” he commented with a small smile at Lucas as he rolled up to him. Lucas grinned and moved out of the way so Cooper could roll out onto the deck. “Good job,” he said quietly, looking at the other man, biting his lip against saying anything else that might be too much. Being this close to Cooper for weeks now had just increased his yearning, and jacking off was a twice-a-day occurrence (at least), just to keep himself in line. It didn’t help with the ache inside, though.
82 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux “Shut up,” Cooper grumbled good-naturedly. He held one of the wheels of his chair and spun the other side hard to turn the chair on a dime and sat looking back at the other man with a small grin. “You okay?” he asked worriedly as he saw the look on Lucas’s face. Realizing he had been caught staring, Lucas blinked and smiled automatically. “Yeah, sure. Here,” he said, holding out the beer, trying to look anywhere but at his lov... at the other man’s face. He didn’t know if he could call him his lover anymore. It had been a couple of weeks since Cooper had said or done anything remotely along those lines other than the kisses they shared when Cooper wanted something off limits (like beer). Granted, he’d been drugged to the gills, but…. Cooper took the beer with a frown and watched Lucas closely. Over the last two weeks, after he’d begun to actually remember things he did on the painkillers, he had been having fits of serious guilt. “I’m sorry you’re stuck here,” he offered as a breeze picked up and tugged at his loose hair. He closed his eyes and lifted his face to the wind, unable to resist after having been cooped up inside for so long. Once Cooper’s eyes were closed, Lucas could stare all he wanted, soaking in the vision of him. He knew why Cooper was saying what he was, but Lucas couldn’t exactly admit to the man that he was thrilled to be here – no matter Cooper’s condition – and that he had no plans of ever leaving until Cooper told him to. “Not stuck,” he said hoarsely before taking a long drink of beer. “Yes, you are,” Cooper argued as he opened his eyes again and smiled softly at the other man. The last few weeks had been frustrating on more than one level. Cooper was not the type of man who sat around on his ass easily. Add to that the fact that he was only just now getting to the point of being able to do things by himself and that the relationship between the two men was uncertain, and Cooper had gone to bed each night wanting to pull out his hair. He sighed and cocked his head at Lucas as the breeze picked up again. “I appreciate your being here,” he said softly. He chewed on his lip and watched the man thoughtfully. “I just want to let you know, though,” he went on worriedly. “Just because we fucked before, don’t feel, you know, obligated.” A chill struck him, and Lucas fought to suppress a shiver. Was this it? So soon? He took another drink of beer, not tasting it as he
Under Contract | 83 swallowed, and carefully set the can on the table. “Are you asking me to leave?” he asked, voice subdued, but he managed to look Cooper in the eye. He wanted to know it, straight up and flat out, if Cooper had decided there was nothing else between them. He was scared. Hell. He was frightened out of his mind. He couldn’t imagine life without Cooper in it. Without Nick in it. Not after this brief taste. “No,” Cooper answered immediately, meeting Lucas’s eyes and smiling slightly. “I’m offering you the chance,” he corrected. “How do you feel after almost three weeks of living with me?” he asked suddenly. “Have you rethought your… opinions?” “You mean do I still think I’m in love with you?” Lucas said evenly, having no earthly clue where the nerve came from to make him say it out loud. Cooper merely nodded in answer. He didn’t want to speak and hear his voice crack. Blinking at him, Lucas slowly shook his head. “I don’t think I’m in love with you.” Cooper pressed his lips tightly together and nodded. He had been expecting that answer. He hadn’t been expecting it to twist his chest around quite so much, or the pang of pain it caused. Lucas almost stood up and crowed when he saw what looked like upset in Cooper’s eyes. But he managed to stay calm, because it was important. It was important that Cooper believed him. “I know I love you,” Lucas said quietly, but firmly. He’d come to realize it over the past weeks. It was more than “in love” – a passing fancy, something to be worked out of his system. It was something irreplaceable in his life now. Cooper blinked at him and sat there staring stupidly. “But I’ve been horrible,” he protested in confusion. “I clearly remember threatening you on at least three occasions,” he reminded as he waved his unopened beer through the air. Lucas chuckled. “And you were absolutely gorgeous while doing so.”
84 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux Cooper huffed and sighed softly. He was still afraid that lust had more to do with Lucas’s thinking than love. But then again, he had repeatedly refused to sleep in Cooper’s bed with him. Even when Cooper begged him. Surely that said something, right? “I think you’re insane,” he finally decided with a shake of his head. Pressing his lips together, Lucas shrugged and just looked at him, aware that there was probably something suitably mushy like devotion shining in his eyes or some crap, but he couldn’t help it. “Guess so,” he murmured before tilting his head back and draining the can. “Another beer?” he asked, shifting his chair to stand. Cooper looked down at his unopened can and handed it silently to Lucas. “A new one. Cold,” he murmured as he squinted up at the other man. The guilt was overwhelming, both at the fact that Lucas had been spending all his time here with a very cranky patient and for the fact that Lucas still insisted he was in love. He couldn’t possibly be; Cooper knew that. But he deserved more than he was getting. “Ted,” he said suddenly as he pondered this. “I want you in my bed tonight,” he declared, uncaring of the consequences and prepared to beg again. Lucas paused next to him, looking down at Cooper and seeing the discomfort in his shoulders, in his eyes. It still bothered him, obviously, Lucas thought. Enough that the other man was making a very obvious peace offering, one he wasn’t too proud to accept. But…. He crouched down next to Cooper, setting one hand on the thigh of his good leg. “Why?” he asked directly. “Because I do,” Cooper answered with a small smile. “Because we had a really fucking incredible night before that got cut short, and there’s no reason we shouldn’t have more.” Yeah. Lucas wasn’t too proud. He would take what he could get as long as Cooper would give it. It twinged a little – okay, a lot – to think he was a pity fuck. He nodded slowly. “Okay,” he agreed with a small smile. Cooper reached out and took hold of the other man’s chin, leaning toward him with a pained wince. “Your eyes can’t lie,” he whispered. “I know you want me just like I want you.” And it was true. He wanted nothing more than to touch this man all the time. He was an incredible
Under Contract | 85 specimen, there was no arguing that. He had been managing to keep his hands off him so far by sheer force of the pain it caused to move. “Yeah,” Lucas answered hoarsely. Cooper held his chin firmly for a few more moments, eyes searching for the source of the problem. Finally he released him, letting the pad of his thumb drift over Lucas’s bottom lip slowly as he did so. “Go get my beer,” he ordered quietly. “We’ll talk more after I’ve been mentally lubricated.” Drawing a shaky breath, Lucas waited until Cooper broke contact before standing, taking the warm beer and walking into the kitchen. He yanked open the fridge door, slid the lukewarm can onto the shelf and grabbed two more cold ones. When he shut the door, he leaned his forehead against it. Why couldn’t it be easy? Why couldn’t he just go for the easy fuck? Why did he have to make it all messy and achy with this emotional shit? Turning around to lean against the fridge, he raised his eyes to the ceiling. He couldn’t help it. He just couldn’t help the way he felt. Out on the deck, Cooper sat and stared out at the expanse of his back yard. He wasn’t even sure what he wanted anymore. He had never been in love and had never particularly wanted to be. But Lucas was the type he could easily fall for. In fact, he may have already started, if he was completely honest with himself. But with just a few weeks under their belts, tainted by pain and drugs and a very heavy dose of lust, it was just too hard to tell. One thing he knew he felt, though: guilt so massively heavy that he could barely breathe when he thought about how unfair the situation was to the other man. He rubbed his eyes in frustration and lowered his head. Fucking him would just make it harder in the long run, right? But they had already crossed that bridge, there was no going back. Fucking him more, and frequently, it sounded damn fun. But it was hardly fair. Right? “Lucas!” he called out impulsively. Flinching in surprise as if he’d been caught with his hand in the cookie jar, Lucas grabbed the two bags of chips on the counter and walked to the door with his bounty. “Yeah?”
86 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux “I don’t know what I’m doing,” Cooper admitted to him candidly without opening his eyes. “I don’t want to hurt you, and I feel like I will. I… I want you,” he said in a slightly surprised tone. “I miss you when you’re not here,” he added with a slight flush. The honesty in Cooper’s voice caught him off guard, but Lucas felt it deep in his bones. He was trying. Cooper was trying. It just made Lucas love him even more. He carefully set the stuff on the table and knelt down beside him, then slid one hand gently to cup his cheek, turning his chin toward him. And when he could, he leaned up and pressed a light kiss to those full lips. Cooper shivered slightly into the kiss and sighed. “I do want you,” he repeated softly. “I do.” Lucas nuzzled Cooper’s cheek, just wanting to be close. “Then it’ll be okay,” he murmured, kissing the other man’s cheekbone ever so gently. “You’ve got to do one thing for me, though,” Cooper responded seriously. “You’ve got to stop being so goddamn sexy when you’re around here because I can’t tackle you yet.” Pulling back in surprise, Lucas grinned. “You think I’m sexy?” he asked, his fingers sliding from Cooper’s cheek down to splay in the open neckline of his shirt. Cooper huffed a laugh and rolled his eyes, reaching out and sliding his fingers through Lucas’s belt loops. “You have no idea,” he laughed. Chuckling, Lucas shuffled closer to the side of the wheelchair, up against Cooper’s leg as he continued to kneel. “So tell me,” he murmured, dragging a finger down Cooper’s chest, circling each button as he went. “I’m not above accepting a little ego-stroking.” “And what other stroking would you like?” Cooper purred as he reached up and ran his hands through Lucas’s light hair. “You honest to God don’t know what you look like, do you?” he asked in amazement. His thumb slid over the man’s cheek and he let his gaze rake over him slowly. Humming slightly, Lucas turned his head to kiss the pad of Cooper’s thumb. “Sure I do,” he rumbled. He knew. Too tall, too
Under Contract | 87 muscled, clumsy. Huge paws for hands and for all his height, still stocky. Messy hair that curled no matter what he did to it. He would much prefer to look like Cooper. Long and lanky. Wiry. Slim fingers and tight ass. Straight, smooth hair. Gorgeous. “I don’t think you do,” Cooper responded as he tugged the man closer and pressed a kiss to the spot he knew turned into a dimple when Lucas smiled. “Do you have any idea how hard it is to find someone stronger than I am?” he asked in a soft purr. “Massive shoulders, legs that go for miles. Jesus, Ted, there isn’t an inch of you that isn’t hard muscle. You can’t possibly think you’re anything but incredible,” he growled as he tugged at a stray curl. Sighing happily, Lucas let his eyes flutter mostly shut. “Hearing that from you is awful convincing,” he said, humoring the other man. “But incredible is quite a stretch,” he added as he turned his neck, trying to encourage Cooper to touch more. “No, it’s not,” Cooper breathed as he drifted his lips over Lucas’s slowly. “I wake up every night, knowing you’re down the hall, dreaming about you holding me down,” he admitted. Lucas groaned, biting his lower lip before trying to catch those sinful lips. “Every night?” he breathed. “Every. Night,” Cooper growled in growing frustration. “All day here alone, the only thing I can think about when I’m sitting around is that night….” Thrilling at every word, Lucas mouthed along Cooper’s jaw. “Stroke me some more,” he murmured against Cooper’s skin as he slid one hand over his thigh. “I’ll return the favor.” “I watch your eyes when you’re not paying attention,” Cooper murmured softly. “I can’t help it, they fascinate me. Sometimes they’re like sapphires, when you’re angry or turned on. They go flat. Other times they’re just this gorgeous ocean blue,” he told the man with a gentle nuzzle. “When you’re happy,” he growled as his hand slid up under the soft T-shirt Lucas wore. The words were going straight to Lucas’s cock, and he couldn’t get enough of tasting the other man’s skin, sliding his tongue along Cooper’s collarbone. He moved his hand to Cooper’s inner thigh, stroking the
88 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux denim, moving up to the crotch of his jeans. “More,” he begged after sucking on a spot close to Cooper’s throat. Cooper groaned softly and reached down quickly to grab Lucas’s hand. “Take me inside,” he requested hoarsely. “Bedroom.” Forcing his eyes open, Lucas could see the blazing heat in Cooper’s, and he couldn’t refuse. He lurched to his feet – there’s that clumsiness again, he thought – and unlatched the brake on the wheelchair. He made himself turn him slowly, unwilling to risk pitching Cooper out of the chair. He moved them back into the house, closing the French doors behind them. As soon as they were in Cooper’s room he locked the wheels down again. Cooper pushed up against the arms of the wheelchair, the muscles in his shoulders and arms bunching as he levered himself out of the chair. “Get your clothes off,” he ordered as he reached for the buttons of his own shirt. He didn’t want to have to move again once he got the man into bed. Both Lucas’s brows shot up, but he didn’t argue. He leaned over at the waist to start unlacing his boots after yanking off his T-shirt and throwing it to the floor. Cooper pushed his loose khaki shorts down over the cast on his leg and shrugged out of his shirt gingerly. He crawled onto the bed and flattened out, watching with what could only be described as a lecherous grin as Lucas undressed. Stepping out of his boots, Lucas tossed them aside and straightened up, hands on his fly, when he looked up to see Cooper watching him. He froze. And flushed. Cooper was watching him like he was going to eat him alive. Cooper raised an eyebrow and twirled his finger through the air, gesturing for the man to continue. “The only thing better than looking at you is feeling you,” he growled softly. Lucas swallowed hard and got to moving, shucking his jeans and boxer briefs. He was already obviously hard, though he had some to go, but he didn’t doubt one touch from Cooper would get the job done. He moved over to sit on the edge of the bed, leaning one arm over Cooper’s body to brace himself. “What next?” he prodded, since Cooper seemed to be giving all the orders. And Lucas didn’t mind one single bit.
Under Contract | 89 “Come here,” Cooper murmured as he reached to drag his fingers down hard muscle and tanned skin. “Just come here and lay beside me,” he requested, knowing that any sort of sexual doings would be initiated by Lucas and Lucas alone since he himself could hardly move. Drawing a breath to calm himself, Lucas stood and walked around the bed, crawled over next to Cooper and laid down facing him, body nearly touching all the way down, Cooper’s broken leg safely on the other side. He took a bit of license and placed his hand lightly on Cooper’s arm, stroking. Cooper raised his arm and slid it under Lucas’s head, unable to roll to face him but determined to touch him as much as possible. He pulled Lucas closer and practically half on top of him, then kissed him hungrily as his body responded to the contact. Lucas happily joined the urgent kiss, his hand sliding carefully over Cooper’s chest and down to his waist, away from cracked ribs and closer to other parts of his body that needed attention. When his long fingers curled around hot, hard flesh, he groaned into Cooper’s mouth. It still amazed him how much Cooper seemed to want him. Cooper echoed the groan and lifted his hips, oblivious to the tinge of pain in his ribs. “I’d almost forgotten how good you felt,” he gasped breathlessly. His heart was pounding with what could only be nerves once more; his body trembled with anticipation and desire. He dug his fingers into Lucas’s hair and pulled him closer, growling into the heated kiss. Hearing the catch of breath, Lucas shifted his hips and weight over Cooper’s good leg and hip, pushing the other man against the mattress. “You said you liked being held down,” he rasped after breaking the kiss. He started moving his hand over Cooper’s cock, turning his chin to nip and lick at his neck, looking for sensitive spots. “Yeah,” Cooper groaned softly, moving as much as his injured body would allow him under the weight of Lucas’s body. “I keep dreaming about you,” he told the other man in a hoarse voice. His eyes closed involuntarily and a tortured moan accompanied his words. “About this,” he groaned as he tilted his head back and shivered all over. “Just enjoy,” Lucas breathed in his ear, rubbing his body against Cooper’s while his hand kept moving. He applied his lips to the bared neck, sucking and licking, inhaling his scent.
90 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux Cooper shivered uncontrollably and groaned in agreement. He couldn’t exactly do much to participate anyway, right? He growled again in frustration, not used to being quite as submissive as his injuries forced him to be. “Awwww,” Lucas drawled after hearing Cooper’s lament. “Can’t I distract you enough?” he murmured, dragging his tongue down the length of Cooper’s neck. “Try harder,” Cooper gasped with a mischievous grin as he practically vibrated with the urge to move. Lucas purred slightly, kissing the corner of Cooper’s mouth and that sinful little grin as he shifted his weight to kneel astride Cooper’s good leg and hold down both hips. Without warning he ducked his head and licked a broad swath up his thickening erection. Cooper pushed his hips against the hold Lucas had on him, whimpering helplessly. “Ted,” he groaned as his fingers slid into the other man’s curls and tugged. He wasn’t even sure what he wanted. Just more. The sounds his action evoked helped Lucas’s confidence, not to mention he’d wrangled another instance of his name on Cooper’s lips. He repeated the action over and over, from root to tip, both sides, even venturing down to lick over his balls before lapping at the tip. It was addictive, each touch of his tongue and lips letting him feel a twitch or swell in return until Cooper was fully erect and standing tall. He carefully closed his lips about the head of his cock. “Oh, fuck,” Cooper gasped desperately. He arched his back and groaned at the pain in his ribs, but it faded quickly and he tightened his grip on Lucas’s hair. Lucas hummed as he licked in a circle, tasting and learning, grinding himself against Cooper’s leg, thrilling in the feel of it. Wanting to hear more of those noises, he decided to try something else, and he started slowly suckling at the head, his big hand closing around the shaft again. “I thought you said you didn’t know what you were doing,” Cooper gasped breathlessly. He was trying desperately not to move too much, but it was nearly impossible not to push his hips up against the man holding him down.
Under Contract | 91 Bringing his weight to bear on Cooper’s hips, Lucas held him down as he pulled his mouth off him with a quiet slurp. “I don’t,” he murmured, kissing the juncture of his abdomen and thigh. “Just trying to make you feel good. Don’t hurt your ribs,” he instructed before sucking Cooper’s cock between his lips again, this time pulling more in to press against his tongue. Cooper cried out softly and tapered off the sound into another whimper. “Don’t hurt your ribs,” he echoed in strained frustration, huffing a laugh that turned into a groan. “Get up here,” he growled as he reached down and tugged at Lucas’s shoulder demandingly. Frowning, Lucas lifted up, licking his lips a bit as he carefully crawled up Cooper’s body, bracing his weight on his arms. “Was I doing it wrong?” he asked, concerned that the groan might have been one of pain. “Fuck, no,” Cooper growled as he tugged again at Lucas’s hip. “I’m just selfish,” he murmured with a smirk as he urged the other man to crawl higher. “I want to taste you. Now,” he demanded. Lucas choked and balked, holding his hips back despite the tugging. “Wait a minute, I’m not straddling your chest, I’m way too much of a bear for those ribs,” he protested, starting to pull his leg over so he could kneel at Cooper’s side. Cooper turned his head and pulled Lucas closer, growling impatiently. Maneuvering up the bed on his knees, Lucas stopped practically on the pillows, feeling awfully like he was taking advantage. “Maybe this isn’t the greatest idea,” he said weakly, watching the other man lick his lips. “Fine,” Cooper grinned knowingly, beginning to curl and sit up. Lucas’s eyes widened. “What… what are you doing?” He reached for Cooper’s shoulders, not wanting the other man to hurt anymore than he absolutely had to. Not if he could do something about it. Cooper reached around Lucas’s waist and pulled him closer, laying flat again and tugging the other man with him into the position he’d wanted in the first place. He slid his free hand up Lucas’s thigh and licked at the head of his cock with a pleased purr. Practically gurgling, Lucas braced his arms on the headboard and just tried to remember how to breathe. His hand these past two and a half weeks hadn’t been enough.
92 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux Not near enough. One touch of Cooper’s tongue and he was ready to explode. He opened his mouth to speak, but all that came out were incoherent sounds. Cooper growled and used the arm around Lucas’s waist to encourage the man to thrust down. Lucas may have been learning, natural though he was, but Cooper knew exactly what he wanted and he knew how to do it. He hummed slightly, pulling at Lucas’s hips again. Groaning, Lucas’s head fell forward as he let Cooper manipulate his body, and his body seemed to know better what to do than he did. His hips started to move, following the motion of the other man’s hands, and the hot wetness that surrounded him made his breath catch. Cooper growled softly and tried not to let his body writhe as he urged Lucas to start truly thrusting. He couldn’t speak to him, so he let his fingers digging into the man’s muscles do the begging for him. Lucas’s fingers gripped the headboard so tightly that his knuckles were white, and he gave in to his body’s urging and started to push his hips forward, helpless to resist the sucking heat of Cooper’s mouth. “Nick,” he rasped. Cooper hummed in response, wondering if he could actually take the man all the way in if he gave in to his urging. Lucas was, after all, very well endowed. He could sure as hell try, and even if his ribs weren’t happy, it had been two weeks of waking up aching, and he intended to enjoy this. Gasping, Lucas was losing touch with his worries and falling into pure pleasure. He forced himself to uncurl one hand from the headboard and slid his long fingers into Cooper’s hair. He eyes were shut now, and all he could think about was sinking farther into that heat as he felt his gut clenching. Cooper groaned and swirled his tongue. His fingers dug into Lucas’s hip and he tilted his head back, trying to relax his throat. He wanted to taste the man, to hear him let go without being in the midst of his own pleasure. Lucas bit his lip against a sharp whine, his hand combing gently through Cooper’s hair to cup the back of his head, a contrast to the growing strength of his thrusts. He had to gasp for breath and moan aloud as he felt his cock thump against what had to be Cooper’s palate, and then
Under Contract | 93 it kept sliding down…. His hands both tightened as an unfettered howl escaped him. Cooper would have grinned if he’d been able. Instead he fought the inevitable gag reflex and dug his fingers into Lucas’s hip hard enough to bruise him. He raised his knees, the cast heavy but moving with him all the same as Lucas fucked his mouth. Each thrust that slid down into Cooper’s throat drew another moaning cry from him, and Lucas’s breath finally got away from him as he felt himself going over the line. He grasped frantically at Cooper’s head. “Nick… Nick –” he tried to warn as he shook all over. Cooper moaned in response with difficulty, wanting desperately to urge the man on but unable to do anything other than swallow heavily and pull Lucas’s hips closer. A few more snaps of his hips and Lucas lost it, back arching as he cried out hoarsely which each pulse, his come jerking from him into Cooper’s mouth. “Fuck!” he nearly sobbed, overwhelmed and twitching all over, barely holding onto the headboard. Cooper wrapped both arms around Lucas’s hips and pulled him closer, groaning and swallowing and arching his back as he swirled his tongue hungrily. The continued sucking drew another hoarse cry out of Lucas as he clenched hard. He would have come again if he’d had it in him, and he babbled as everything became so sensitive he could hardly stand it. He begged, he pleaded, he wriggled, all the while going out of his mind. With a grin Cooper finally released him, licking his lips as he dragged his fingers over the tanned skin. Shuddering, Lucas leaned over, curling up and clutching at his belly as he tried to not fall over. “Fuck, Cooper,” he finally breathed, still shaking. Cooper laughed softly and held his side as he did so, not caring that it hurt to laugh. “God, I love to make you do that,” he chuckled. Moaning, Lucas carefully moved off Cooper and lowered himself to a sprawl, and he leaned his forehead against Cooper’s shoulder. “Damn,” he breathed, another shudder passing through him. “I think you blew my mind,” he muttered. Cooper laughed harder as he reached up and pulled the man up to kiss him. Lucas was putty in his hands, melting against his lips,
94 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux practically boneless. He sighed against Cooper’s full lips; he could taste himself on them, and it stirred him again. “Okay?” Cooper asked softly, half in amusement, growling as his body screamed at him that it was his turn, dammit! He didn’t make a move though, enjoying the throb instead as he slid his hands into Lucas’s hair. “Okay?” Lucas repeated in disbelief, turning his head to kiss Cooper again. “I don’t know what to say,” he breathed, lightly pressing one hand to his chest, feeling the pounding of Cooper’s heart. “I feel selfish,” he murmured, kissing his jaw. Cooper reached over and blatantly felt the man up, grinning cheekily. “You don’t feel selfish to me,” he snickered. Lucas laughed but twitched away from Cooper’s hand helplessly. “Sensitive, sensitive!” he yelped, squirming. Cooper huffed plaintively and reached out. “Get back here and touch me, damn you,” he growled. Grinning, Lucas leaned back toward Cooper and licked his bottom lip while he groped below the waist. “You know I’ll return the favor,” he growled. Cooper groaned and nodded. breathlessly.
“Won’t take long,” he purred
Curling his fingers around the straining cock, Lucas slid back down the bed, leaning on Cooper’s hip and lapping at the head, tasting the sharp tang and humming quietly. The flavor exploded over his tongue, and he wondered why he’d been afraid to try this before. “You don’t have to,” Cooper tried to assure the man, though it came out severely gargled. Lucas turned his eyes up to Cooper and licked again, slowly and luxuriously. “Do you like it?” he asked before slathering his tongue over Cooper’s cock once again. “God, yes,” Cooper groaned without thinking. Confidence bolstered, Lucas lapped again and slid his lips around him and sucked delicately, fingers starting to pump. Cooper cursed
Under Contract | 95 emphatically and raised his hips, his hand tangling in Lucas’s hair as the contact sent shock waves through his body. More sure of his hand than his mouth, Lucas squeezed and stroked, interchanging gentle suction with long, lavish licks. He could hear the breaths huffing from the other man, and it spurred him on. “Ted,” Cooper gasped as his entire body flushed with pleasure and his gut twisted. He gave the man’s hair a gentle tug, not wanting him to move, but knowing if he had never done this before then a warning was a must. He shouted the man’s name again, toes curling and pleasure coiling in his groin as he tugged gently again. Taking the warning, Lucas lifted his mouth with one last hard suck, stroking hard as he leaned up to capture Cooper’s mouth in a voracious kiss. Cooper called out into the man’s mouth and bucked his hips, gripping him hard as he came with Ted’s name moaned on his lips for perhaps the tenth time that week. It was the first time Lucas heard it, though. The orgasm ripped though Cooper, arching his back and making his hips buck. Sighing happily, Lucas continued to kiss him as he felt the hot liquid drops scatter over his hand, he could feel more on his knuckles from Cooper’s belly, and his body jerked under Lucas’s weight as he tried to hold him still. He purred Cooper’s name between each open-mouthed kiss as his hand moved slower and slower. “Fuck,” was the only thing Cooper could think to respond as his body melted into the bed. Lucas chuckled. “Now you know what it feels like to have your brains sucked out with a straw, hmmm?” He settled down on his side next to Cooper, content to be close. Cooper slid his arm under Lucas’s neck and pulled him closer. “Are you using brain cells?” he asked incredulously. “Nope. Not me. Uh uh. None left. You slurped ’em all,” Lucas murmured, curling closer. “Mmm,” Cooper hummed, wishing like hell that he could move. Suddenly he growled in frustration and tugged on Lucas. “Hmmm?” Lucas shifted until his leg was practically on top of Cooper’s thigh.
96 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux “I hate being hurt,” Cooper murmured with feeling. Snuggling up close, Lucas placed a soothing kiss against his neck. “I’m taking good care of you, aren’t I?” “Yes,” Cooper murmured. “You shouldn’t have to. And I should be able to fuck you, damn it,” he snarled. Lucas chuckled. “Soon, tiger. Your ribs are a lot better, and soon the pain in your leg will start to taper off. Since your knee is good, you’ll be able to kneel.” Cooper shivered slightly and nodded enthusiastically. “Like that idea? Maybe once your ribs are healed up, we can try something with you sitting up,” Lucas murmured against warm skin, hitching his half-hard cock against Cooper’s thigh. “Christ,” Cooper groaned plaintively. “It’s too long to wait,” he practically whined as he tried to tug Lucas closer. “No, it’s not. You crack one of those ribs again, then there’s no sex for another few weeks. So behave,” Lucas chastised. “I want you to get better, too, you know.” Cooper groaned and then huffed sulkily. “Why don’t you make yourself useful and go get my beer, huh?” he asked with a slight grin. Lucas purred, licked Cooper’s neck one last time and rolled out of bed. He stepped into the bathroom and grabbed a couple of towels, tossing one at Cooper as he walked by and down the hall nude. “Hmph,” Cooper grunted as he cleaned himself. He couldn’t even sit up to watch Lucas walk away.
LEANING over at the fridge, Lucas pulled out two beers and stood up with a jerk as he heard the crunch of gravel outside. He glanced out the side window to see a truck coming up the drive, full of guys. “Shit,” he breathed. He dropped the beers in the sink and ran down the hall. “Cooper!” He skidded to a halt and grabbed his briefs and jeans, yanking them on. “You’re getting ready to have visitors.” “Oh, the hell I am,” Cooper responded languidly as he lay unmoving on the bed.
Under Contract | 97 Lucas stood up, yanking his T-shirt over his head and tucking it in, fastening his belt. “You think the four guys getting ready to park outside are going to take no for an answer? From me? Who they’re probably not expecting to be here? Your choice,” he said, deciding barefoot would have to do. At least he was dressed. “Fuck,” Cooper sighed as he pushed himself to a sitting position with a wince. “They don’t know you’re staying with me?” “They know I’m checking on you, bringing dinner, paperwork, visiting in the evenings, that kind of thing,” Lucas said, tossing Cooper his T-shirt. “I wasn’t sure you’d approve of more, since you weren’t really in your right mind when we discussed it.” He turned his head when the dull sound of vehicle doors slamming shut echoed outside. “I’m so not dressed,” Cooper snickered as he heard the doors. Lucas sighed and scooped up Cooper’s clothes, tossing them in the hamper and shutting the closet door. He yanked back the bedspread and pulled it up over Cooper’s waist, tucking it under his elbows. “That’ll have to do,” he muttered as someone started knocking on the door, yelling for Cooper. Cooper muttered as he settled between the sheets. He pulled the hair band off his wrist and began to pull his hair back into a ponytail. “Okay. I’m still naked,” he said with a shake of his head and a small laugh. “You’re covered. Just don’t let them try to sign your cast or you’ll be giving them a free show.” Lucas headed down the hallway to where the guys were pounding on the door. Cooper sat there scowling, discomfort sinking in as the brief postorgasmic-painkiller high began to ebb. He didn’t want to see anyone while he was sitting here naked, hoping he didn’t smell like come and sex. He looked down at the hump in the bed that was his cast and around the room frantically. Of course they’d want to sign his cast. They would probably want to draw embarrassing things on it and write THIS END UP on his heel, and then he would have to tell them he was naked and open the door to all sorts of awkwardness. He threw back the covers and lurched out of the bed with difficulty.
98 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux Lucas got to the front door and unlatched it, opening it to look out at the guys, the usual annoyed look on his face. They all got quiet real quick, staring with large eyes at the one person they certainly didn’t expect to be there. There was no truck out front because Lucas had gotten into the habit of parking out back. It was easier to carry in groceries from the deck that way, but of course the boys didn’t know that, and they had no idea what to say about the sudden appearance of their boss. “I guess you’re here to visit Cooper?” Lucas asked, eyes narrowing. Four heads just bobbed in answer. Lucas sighed and rolled his eyes, looking them over. They looked to be fresh off the site, still dirty, dusty and worse. “Christ, guys,” he complained, though with much less fervor than usual, “This is his house. At least take off the muddy boots and leave them on the porch. And dust yourselves off while you’re at it.” Travis, Corey, Billy, and Sanders scrambled to obey, and Lucas just rolled his eyes. “No one steps foot inside here without me checking for mud, got that?” A chorus of, “Yes, boss,” was his answer. In the bedroom, Cooper didn’t do so well with walking. But he managed to get to the dresser and dig through for a pair of loose, faded sweat pants he had long ago cut into shorts. Now to get them on and back in the bed before… then he heard Lucas bitching at his visitors and cocked his head. Actually, the man might scare them away and Nick could stay naked. Lucas finally started letting them in after they passed inspection, and they stood politely in the foyer until Lucas shut the door. He noticed them staring at his bare feet, and he glanced down and back up at them. “What?” he growled softly. They all were suddenly looking different directions. Lucas sighed and led them through the archway and into the hallway that opened to the other sections of the house. “He’s back in the bedroom, resting,” Lucas emphasized. “So….” He looked them over; they seemed uneasy. He sighed. “Just take it easy on him, okay?” he asked sincerely.
Under Contract | 99 The guys actually blinked, and Billy answered first. “Sure, boss. We won’t stay long. Just wanted to let him know we’re thinking of him.” The others added similar comments, and Lucas nodded, turning to lead them down the hallway to the French doors at the end. He pushed them open and walked in. “Hey, Cooper, you’ve… got….” He stopped in place, tilting his head. The bed was empty. The other guys crowded in around him. “What did ya do, boss? Bury him out back?” Travis joked. Cooper stood inside the bathroom, holding his ribs and biting his lip. He’d managed to grab a T-shirt as well, and he was now fully clothed. But he’d not thought to have to explain why he had made the trek to the bathroom without his chair or crutches. He licked his lips, waited another moment and took a deep, steadying breath before hopping to the door and gripping the door frame to peer out into the room. Lucas had just turned around to smack Travis a good one when he heard the bathroom door snick open, and then the guys were greeting Cooper, moving toward him like a small pack of dogs. Lucas, however, noticed that Cooper had neither his chair, nor his crutches, and he wondered how Cooper had managed that little feat. He just stood there with his arms crossed, shaking his head. Cooper smiled genuinely and received the hugs and greetings of the boys with his usual grace and shining green eyes. He doubted any of the boys noticed just how much pain standing there was causing him. But Lucas could see the tightening around his mouth and the growing glaze in his eyes. “Hey, guys, let him sit back down, would you? He’s only somewhat mobile at this point,” Lucas said from where he stood in the doorway. He quashed his temptation to go over and let Cooper hang on him to get back to the bed. If Cooper asked, sure thing, but assuming could have too many repercussions. “Give me a hand, hmm?” Cooper asked as he lifted his arms like he was trying to take flight. Sanders slid under one side, and Billy under the other. It was almost comical, how Cooper towered over the four shorter men. He could almost use them as crutches. “No passing out,”
100 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux Cooper told Sanders with a grin as his eyes found Lucas’s over their heads. A small smile pulled at Lucas’s lips as he watched the other guys help. They really liked Cooper. Liked him and respected him not only for his ability as an assistant foreman, but also just as a genuinely nice guy. He turned and left them to visit, heading back to the kitchen to put the beers back in the fridge. He then sat at the table to at least act like he was working on paperwork. While in fact, he was thinking about Cooper. It didn’t take long for Cooper to tire from the visit. Considering what he’d been up to before, it was no surprise. “So, how long’s he staying here every day?” Corey asked in a hushed voice. They’d helped Cooper into the bed and were all sitting around, hovering and leaning close conspiratorially. “We knew he stopped by, but we thought he’d be gone by now.” “He stays, pretty much. I need the help doing stuff,” Cooper answered a little uneasily. “He stays?” Sanders asked. “You’re living with the boss?” Corey asked in shock. scary?” he asked with a small laugh.
“Is it
“He’s all right, guys,” Cooper answered with a small laugh. “He’s made it longer than any of you ever would,” he told them with a toss of his pillow at Billy. “Hey, where’s your girlfriend, huh? Why isn’t she staying with you instead of making you tolerate him?” Corey asked. “She, uh,” Cooper swallowed heavily and blushed slightly, trying desperately to think. “She left me,” he told them, blushing harder with the blatant lie. Luckily they took the coloring as shame or anger or whatever they liked, and the news was met with a smattering of curses and angry mutterings. “It’s all right, though, you know?” Cooper added uncomfortably. “I might try being gay for awhile,” he ventured in a joking voice, earning a round of raucous laughter from the boys. “Hey, we could’ve taken turns staying with you. You know we would have helped,” Billy objected after a moment. “Rather than being with the boss all the time. He’s –”
Under Contract | 101 “Stuck up,” Corey said. “A hardass,” Travis chipped in. “Can’t do anything but yell,” Sanders added. Cooper frowned and shook his head. He wasn’t exactly sure how to answer this, and he knew if he didn’t stick up for Lucas the guilt would hit him again. “He’s a good guy when you take off the hard hat. He brings me beer,” he told them, knowing that was one thing that would impress them. They all got quiet. Then Billy snickered. “Yeah. Right. Nice try, Coop.” The others laughed, too. “What? He does,” Cooper laughed. “I think he just needs to get to know you guys. Actually, no,” he corrected with a shake of his head. “No, we’d need to ease him in gently, not throw him into the loony bin.” Travis shook his head. “Man, your drugs are making you high.” “That’s what they’re supposed to do.” “I’m still stuck on the beer remark. Does the boss even drink beer?” Billy wondered. “I can’t believe you’re tolerating him,” Corey said. “I heard from someone at Central Office you put in a transfer request to get away from him.” Cooper stared at the man as if he’d been slapped. “How many people know that?” he asked in a hushed voice. Corey shrugged. “Don’t know, most of us on site, I guess. Nobody was surprised. He’s always treated you like shit for absolutely no reason. You shouldn’t have to put up with it.” “Emmy in the office can’t keep her lips shut,” Billy grumped. “She let it out when she saw the boss recommended me for as assistant foreman’s job. I would’ve liked to have heard it from him. But she says Central hasn’t approved it yet.” “The boss rec’d you for an assistant’s job?” Corey said in shock. Cooper was silent, sitting stiffly in bed as he frowned at Billy thoughtfully. Without realizing it, his leg began to rock slightly. He could
102 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux never sit still for long; it was another nervous habit the men knew well. “So, the entire crew knows, pretty much,” he murmured. “Sure,” Travis piped up. “Some of the guys were considering doing the same, shipping over to whatever site you end up on.” Billy and Corey both nodded. “Shit,” Cooper breathed as he scrubbed at his face with his palms. Sanders, by far the most perceptive of the group, mostly because he didn’t talk much and instead listened, looked at him sideways. “What’s wrong, Cooper? Something about the boss?” Cooper shook his head and winced at them all. “You can’t all leave,” he told them quietly. “He’ll lose his job if his whole crew transfers.” The guys all frowned, except Sanders, who was still watching Cooper. “You like him,” Sanders realized quietly. The other three looked up incredulously. Cooper glanced over at the man and blinked stupidly. “Huh?” Sanders slowly started to smile. “You like the boss. You’re getting along with him now,” he pointed out. “Spending time away from work with him, you must have discovered something crazy, like he’s human or something.” Cooper almost sighed in relief, and he felt himself slowly blushing. “Yeah, well, I mean, he can’t be all that bad if he’s waiting on me, right?” he stuttered with a wave of his hand at the door. “I still don’t believe he delivers you beer. That’s just insane, man,” Corey prodded. “I wouldn’t have thought he was human. I guess I figured he stayed in that trailer all the time and plugged himself in or something,” Travis said. The three kept exchanging jibes, except for Sanders, who was still smiling. He’d seen that blush. Unobtrusively, he patted Cooper’s hand on the covers. Cooper cut his gaze to Sanders and met the man’s eyes with a sinking feeling. Oh God. He knew. Cooper swallowed with difficulty
Under Contract | 103 and tried not to look like a deer caught in the headlights as he turned his attention back to the others and reached out and smacked Travis upside the head. “Knock it off,” he muttered. “I want a beer, Cooper,” Corey wheedled, and Billy joined in. Travis laughed and covered his mouth. He obviously wanted to join in. “Why don’t you get the boss to bring us some?” Corey added. “I’ll get them,” Sanders said, climbing off the bed. Cooper growled softly at them and shook his head. He couldn’t think past the fact that Sanders might have sniffed them out to even try and stop the antics of the others. Fuck. At least the kid seemed to be keeping it to himself, right? Maybe he’d… fuck, this was a disaster. Sanders padded out of the room and down the hall in his sock feet, stopping when he saw the boss bent over paperwork at the table. If Nick Cooper saw something good in him, then it was there. Looking at the man in a new light now, Sanders spent a minute studying him before clearing his throat. Lucas glanced up and dropped his pencil. “Having a good visit?” he asked practically politely. The younger man found it interesting that Lucas would ask that first. “Yeah. We miss Cooper at the site. He’s a good guy,” he said, watching the boss carefully as the big man dropped his eyes back to his paperwork, trying for nonchalance. But his trembling hand grasping for the pencil gave his nerves away, and Sanders smiled. “Yeah, he’s a good guy. An asset to any site,” Lucas managed to say evenly. Sanders couldn’t help but grin, and he ventured a question. “The guys want some beers, that okay?” Lucas was up and walking into the kitchen and digging into the fridge before Sanders could even blink. “Yeah,” Lucas said, pulling out four cans. “Might as well give one to Travis, he’d steal off the others anyway,” he muttered, going to a cabinet and pulling out coozies. Sanders watched, fascinated as Lucas kept talking and maneuvered his way around Cooper’s kitchen as if he lived there. “Cooper’s already had a beer, so none for him. It mixes with the pain meds and makes him weird.”
104 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux Sanders snuffed a little laugh and continued to watch as Lucas got the beers for him. The foreman looked up to see Sanders smiling at him. Lucas narrowed his eyes. “What?” Sanders shook his head, still smiling. “Nothing, boss. Nothing at all. No beer for Cooper,” he said obediently, holding his hands out for the now foam-wrapped cans. “We don’t want him weird.” Lucas frowned a little, uneasy with that knowing smile. “Yeah,” he agreed quietly. As Sanders headed back down the hall, he sat down, wondering just what the hell that was all about. When Sanders came trotting back with a handful of beers Cooper frowned at him and counted the cans. “Where’s mine?” he demanded as Sanders handed out all the cans and left him empty-handed. “Boss said no beer for you,” Sanders said innocently. The other guys collapsed in laughter. “Damn it!” Cooper shouted in a full out sulk. That made the guys roll even more, and Cooper’s yell brought a tall shadow to the door. “I think I might detect a bit of annoyance coming from this direction?” Lucas posed as he leaned against the doorframe. Sanders snickered as the laughter of the others died in their throats. “Where’s my beer, damn you?” Cooper demanded. The guys all braced themselves for a blasting, except for Sanders, who just watched in amusement now. Lucas just leaned there. “You’ve already had a beer today,” he said mildly. Corey, Billy, and Travis boggled at the sedate response. “I have not,” Cooper protested petulantly, forgetting for the moment the others in the room. “Outside? On the deck?” Lucas reminded good-naturedly. “While you complained – again – about not being able to move?” “I never opened that one,” Cooper sulked, realizing too late that that particular bit of information would not earn him a beer. “Damn it,” he huffed. Lucas actually chuckled before remembering the other guys were there, straining their necks back and forth like they were watching a tennis
Under Contract | 105 match. Except Sanders, who was just sitting next to Cooper, minding his own business. He considered backing off and letting the guys get back to their conversation. But he couldn’t resist. “Any more convincing attempts?” he needled. “You promised,” Cooper reminded slyly as he waved his finger at Lucas and narrowed his eyes. Rolling his eyes to the ceiling, Lucas turned and walked back down the hallway. Sanders even tilted his head to watch him go, his ear ending up on Cooper’s shoulder as the other three hooted about Cooper being denied. Cooper craned his neck and watched Lucas go as well, huffing when he got out of sight. Billy, Corey, and Travis all stopped laughing and turned their heads, frowning, trying to see what Sanders and Cooper were seeing. “What are you two looking at?” Billy asked. “I wanted to see if he’d bring me my beer,” Cooper answered. “Usually that works,” he grumbled. His shoulders slumped and he leaned back against the headboard slowly, trying to find somewhere comfortable for his sore ribs. “So how’s work going?” he asked them. “Any more disasters? Are you making good time?” Only a minute had passed of the guys talking when Sanders jabbed Cooper in the ribs. “Ow!” Cooper cried, throwing his head back and howling pitifully. “Shut up,” Sanders hissed. “Look.” He gestured to the door. The other three guys looked, too, jaws dropping as Lucas walked back up the hallway with a beer in one hand and a sandwich on a plate in the other. Cooper whimpered as he watched the man strolling back down the hall. “My ribs,” he whined softly, biting his lower lip and whimpering some more. He hated hurting so much that it was a distraction from an obvious show of affection from Lucas. And he hated even more that he couldn’t grab Lucas and kiss him right then. Lucas shook his head. “You big crybaby. Here. If you’re drinking a beer, at least eat a sandwich.” He placed the plate on Cooper’s lap and leaned the can against his thigh. It was doubtful anyone would notice his fingers rubbing along his leg before moving away, and Lucas turned and left the room. The Three Stooges were catching flies. Sanders just watched him curiously.
106 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux “I get no freaking sympathy,” Cooper muttered as he poked at the sandwich. It was, he noticed, his very favorite. Sanders chuckled and parroted Lucas. “You big crybaby.” The other three were still staring at Cooper in various degrees of awe. “What?” Cooper asked them uncomfortably. “He brought you a beer,” Corey said blankly. “And a sandwich,” Billy added, stunned. “And he teased you,” Travis added, looking at Cooper like he was a god. Sanders rolled his eyes and leaned back against the headboard. It was so obvious, he didn’t know how they couldn’t see it. But he supposed that if your mind wasn’t geared toward the same-sex side of things in some way it was easy to miss. His brother was openly gay, so Sanders figured he had a wider view of the world than these guys did. No matter, the fact that their hardass foreman and their equally hardass assistant foreman were undoubtedly living together and most likely fucking was just… sweet. He wondered if it was recent or just since the accident. Cooper cleared his throat to interrupt Sanders’s mental ramble and glanced around at them. “I told you I needed help,” he muttered. For some reason, the guys thought that was hysterical, and they went back to their normal nattering and teasing. Sanders just sat in companionable silence next to Cooper, drinking his beer. When the guys weren’t paying attention, Sanders leaned over and murmured, “He does have a great ass.” Cooper chalked it up to the drugs and the beer for the fact that he didn’t jump in response to the whispered words. “I couldn’t possibly know what you’re talking about,” he muttered, blushing furiously as he did so. Sanders turned his eyes on Cooper. “No?” he answered. It was a shame, when a man like Cooper had to be afraid to admit a relationship simply because it was with another guy. Sanders scowled, wondering if he was wrong. Or wondering if perhaps it was more of a one-sided thing. Maybe Lucas was the one who’d fallen? He shrugged, mind whirring in a calculating manner. “More for me, then,” he added, a devious light
Under Contract | 107 entering his eyes. “I think I’ll have another beer.” He climbed off the bed and headed out into the main room before Cooper could respond. Cooper scowled at the man and watched him go. More for him?! What the hell was he up to? Was he trying to smoke Cooper out or was he really thinking to hit on Lucas – a man he’d spent six months fainting in front of – out of the blue? Ending up back at the table where Lucas was spread out, Sanders helped himself to a seat. “How’s it going, boss?” he asked. Lucas looked up at him, eyes narrowing just a bit. “Fine,” he ventured. “Great. Say, I was thinking, if you’d like a break from the big crybaby in there, I wouldn’t mind coming over a few days a week. I think Cooper and I would probably get along better than you two do, you know?” A frown immediately took Lucas’s face. “What do you mean, get along better? Did he say something?” “Just an offer, boss. Not to mention,” Sanders’s voice dropped in tone and he glanced at the hallway as if he didn’t want anyone to hear, “I’d like to spend a little time getting to know him better. You know?” Lucas jerked back like Sanders had reached out and tweaked his nose. Sanders had his eye on Cooper? Lucas couldn’t even ponder that through the intense flash of jealousy. “I mean, it’s no secret there’s no love lost between you two, you know?” Sanders went on innocently. “You’re probably pretty fed up with him, huh? And it’d give you a break, after all.” Faced with either an outright lie or revealing the truth, Lucas just stared at him. “No love lost,” he said weakly. Sanders rolled his eyes and dropped his prodding. “Look, boss. I’m going to get the other guys out of here. Do me a favor, will you?” Lucas focused his eyes on Sanders. suspiciously.
“Yeah?” he asked
108 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux The younger man grinned. “Get him into a shower before company comes over next time.” With that, he popped up and headed back down the hall, leaving a stunned Lucas behind. Cooper narrowed his eyes at Sanders suspiciously when the kid came bouncing back into the bedroom. “Come on, guys,” Sanders said to the other three happily. “Cooper needs his nap time, and we have beers to drink,” he urged as Cooper stared at him with a frown. He shooed the other three down the hall to put their boots back on, and then he stood at Cooper’s bedside. “He treats you bad, I’ll beat the shit out of him,” he stated conversationally. “What are you going to do, faint on him?” Cooper asked before thinking better of it. Grinning, Sanders just shrugged. “I’d hire it done.” “What’d you do to him?” Cooper asked with dread. “Nothing you wouldn’t do,” Sanders answered with a pat to Cooper’s head. “You can go fuck yourself now,” Cooper grumbled without any real heat to the words. Sanders grinned. “Your secret’s safe. I’d rather see true love triumph over all that shouting.” And with that, the slight man strolled out of the room and back down the hall. Lucas was waiting, answering questions from the guys, and he eyed Sanders cautiously. Sanders just smiled innocently and put his boots back on while the other three guys headed out to the truck. “He treats you bad, I’ll beat the shit out of him,” he stated conversationally while lacing. The bigger man boggled. Sanders just snickered and actually had the nerve to reach up and pat Lucas’s shoulder as he walked out the door. Once outside and climbing into the truck, there was a delighted chorus of “Beer!” and they were off down the gravel driveway. Staring after the truck, Lucas finally moved and shut the door before walking back down the hall to see a very petulant-looking Cooper. “Did that little bastard just –”
Under Contract | 109 “Apparently he’s more perceptive than the constant beingunconscious would suggest,” Cooper grumbled in answer. “I’m sorry,” he offered with another flush. “I guess I’m pretty easy to read.” Lucas sighed and sat at the foot of the bed. “Well, at least he doesn’t run at the mouth like Corey,” he said. “Tried to make me jealous, though, the little shit.” Cooper smiled crookedly. “Me, too,” he admitted. “Did it work?” he asked hesitantly. Turning dark blue eyes up to the headboard, Lucas slowly nodded. “Yeah,” he said hoarsely. “Didn’t even take two sentences.” Cooper lowered his head but kept his eyes on Lucas, giving him a slightly predatory look as he sat there chewing on his lower lip. “You know better,” he said finally. “No way he could hold me down like I like,” he teased with eyes that sparkled mischievously. Lucas’s lips twitched. “No, I guess not. Considering he’s like, what, half your size?” he answered, rubbing his fingers over the quilt aimlessly. “What’s wrong?” Cooper demanded as he watched the man. “I don’t think he’ll tell anyone,” he offered, thinking that was the reason behind the sudden silence. Looking up, Lucas met Cooper’s eyes, and he appeared unsure as he shook his head. “Did it… did it work?” he asked, barely audible. Cooper blinked in surprise and then smiled slightly and shook his head. Ducking his head, Lucas almost managed to hide the slight flash of pained disappointment. Drawing a breath, he stood up. “I’m going to make myself a sandwich,” he said in excuse. “Hey,” Cooper protested as he watched the reaction carefully. “For a smart guy you really can be a doofus, you know that?” he told Lucas affectionately. “All that means is I’m actually beginning to believe you,” he pointed out with a slightly drugged smile. Lucas stopped in the doorway. Starting to believe him. Believe that Lucas thought he was in love with him. But he wasn’t jealous. Lucas
110 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux told himself to be happy with the little bits he could get. He offered a small smile to the other man. “Finish your lunch,” he instructed before turning to walk down the hall. Cooper growled in response. Well, that had backfired. “Ted!” he called out in frustration. “How am I supposed to take Sanders seriously as a threat? Honestly? I’ve watched him faint on average of three times a week for the past year, for chrissake!” Turning back to peer into the bedroom, Lucas paused, looking back at him in surprise. Sanders wasn’t a threat? It finally sank in. He smiled genuinely and shook his head, embarrassed now, and his cheeks looked like it, too. “Don’t do that,” Cooper teased as soon as he saw the smile. “You’re entirely too cute when you do that, and there’s something wrong about thinking of you as cute.” If anything, Lucas’s smile turned warmer along with his cheeks, and he had to close his eyes and cover them with one hand. “Damn, Nick,” he muttered. “You’re the only one who does this to me.” Cooper snickered evilly and pressed his hand to his side discreetly to stop the pain. “I sort of hope so,” he responded candidly. Lucas leaned his ass and back against the wall, unconsciously licking his lower lip before he looked back at Cooper. “I’d say I’m glad, but I figure you already know that,” he said wryly. Cooper smiled in response and stared at the man for a long moment. His entire body was buzzing, and he had to actively attempt thought now, but it didn’t matter. “I think maybe that’s something we need to work on,” he finally decided. “It’s not really fair to you, is it?” “What’s fair isn’t important,” Lucas said quietly. “What’s important to me is….” He shook his head. “You let me hang around as long as you want to put up with me.” Just a few more days to let him try uselessly to wean off how much he loved this man. Please. Christ. Lucas knew he was going to fall apart. “What kind of person do you take me for?” Cooper asked with no real heat to the words. “Come back in here and talk to me,” he added with
Under Contract | 111 an irritated wave of his hand. “You’re starting to hurt my sensitive little feelings with these low opinions of yours.” Lucas’s brow furrowed, and he slowly righted himself and walked back to re-enter the bedroom and stand at the foot of the bed. “I don’t have a low opinion of you,” he objected. “Sure you do, if you think I’d keep you around to use you and then kick you out when I was done,” Cooper pointed out with a flop of his hand. Dropping his head, Lucas folded his arms, holding them as if he were cold. “I….” He didn’t know what to say. Would it be too shameful to admit he would gratefully accept whatever Cooper was willing to give? “Then what should I think, Nick?” Lucas asked quietly. “I have to at least try to be realistic.” Although it wouldn’t do him any good. “Realistic?” Cooper asked in confusion. Lucas couldn’t look up at him, it would just tear him up. “When I leave,” he managed to say fairly evenly. “I know how I feel. But I also know you can’t force yourself to feel something in return. I’m sorry if you interpret that as an insult.” “You’re doing it again. That first night, you were already writing it off before even giving us a chance. Give me a chance, Ted,” Cooper requested calmly. Feeling stunned, Lucas finally pulled up his chin to stare at Cooper in something resembling disbelief. “I’d give you anything you wanted,” he said weakly. “Anything you asked for.” “So,” Cooper responded with a half shrug. “Quit thinking about leaving and start thinking about staying,” he asked softly, a smile tugging at his lips. “And write this down in case I forget it when I wake up,” he added with a smirk. Lucas just smiled that little smile again and moved, setting each knee on the bed and crawling slowly up and over both legs and hips until his arms held him up on each side of Cooper’s body. “Oh, I’ll remind you,” he murmured before kissing him. Cooper found himself slightly surprised by the sudden shift into predatory that Lucas had just taken, and if he hadn’t been completely
112 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux exhausted he would have been infinitely turned on by it. He smiled into the kiss and then whimpered a little when it continued, his hand coming up to slide along Lucas’s chest slowly as he did so. Lucas pressed several soft, chaste kisses to those full lips before licking the bottom one slowly. “How about lunch?” he asked huskily after pulling back slightly. “Uh, lunch,” Cooper mumbled as his brain tried to catch up with the rest of him. The sandwich sat, untouched and forgotten at his side. “Do that one more time,” he requested with a tug at Lucas’s shirt front. Grinning, Lucas obeyed, leaning and kissing him several times, lightly, even lovingly. He lingered, brushing their lips together before pulling away. Cooper growled discontentedly when Lucas backed away. His ribs prevented him from following, and he sulked as he leaned back against the headboard. He’d give it one more week, and then he was going to start moving regardless of whether his ribs liked it. Lucas chuckled. “What’s that face for?” he asked as he climbed back over Cooper’s legs and stood beside the bed. “I hate being hurt!” Cooper grunted as he banged his head back on the headboard. “Hey!” Lucas objected, reaching to slide his hand behind Cooper’s skull to pad it against the wood. “You’re hurt enough as it is,” he scolded. Cooper huffed and growled slightly. “How much longer do we have on this job?” he asked suddenly. “You think you’ll be done before I’m better?” Lucas sobered and straightened, looking down at Cooper. He’d not brought it up, because he didn’t want Cooper to know. It was the same reason he’d kept the wrap-up paperwork in a box. “Monday,” he murmured. Cooper blinked at the man stupidly. “Monday?” he echoed incredulously. “Why the hell didn’t you tell me?” he demanded. His eyes hardening, Lucas looked at Cooper in annoyance, waiting for him to remember the conversation they just had.
Under Contract | 113 “Don’t look at me like that,” Cooper grumbled. “You don’t scare me. What about my transfer?” “What about it? It went through Central Office. They wouldn’t let me do anything about it. Word from some blonde in the office was that it went through. So I called up Mark and gave him a recommendation,” Lucas said levelly. “Goddamnit!” Cooper shouted. “Help me up,” he demanded. Worried when Cooper tried to crawl out of bed by himself, Lucas shuffled over and put an arm around him to help him stand and move awkwardly to the wheelchair. “What?” he asked, frowning. “I don’t know, I just needed up,” Cooper growled as he leaned back stiffly in the wheelchair and glowered. He sighed heavily, and his eyes unfocused slightly as he thought about their situation. Technically, it didn’t mean that Lucas had to leave. In fact, it meant that the likelihood of trouble if or when they were caught was much lessened, since they no longer technically worked together. “Maybe it’s not such a bad thing,” he ventured finally as he looked up at Lucas with a raised eyebrow. “I mean, it’s not like we actually ever saw each other during the day anyway even when we were working the same job, right?” Lucas frowned and squatted down next to Cooper. “I guess so. But it doesn’t look like we’ll be working a site together again.” “Is that so bad?” Cooper asked with a frown. Smiling crookedly, Lucas shrugged. “Depends on if you’ll want to see me at lunchtime, depending on how close the sites are. You should be able to set your own schedule, like I do.” “Why?” Cooper asked in confusion. “I keep forgetting you’re still half-drugged. Remember just a minute ago I told you I gave Mark a rec on you?” Lucas asked. Cooper blinked a few times and shook his head. “But….” “But what? I rec’d you for a foreman’s position.” “Why?” Cooper repeated, still confused and frowning up at the man.
114 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux Lucas squinted at him. “Because your last five evals have been outstanding. Because the crews love you. Because you put the job before yourself,” he said, poking lightly at Cooper’s ribs. Cooper hissed and scowled as he flinched away from the gentle poke. “That… but….” Lucas cocked his head. “Now, I know you’re going to miss the excitement of putting up with a crazy-ass foreman, sticking your arms into plaster and dodging piping, but I figured you might consider accepting the promotion.” Cooper frowned deeply at him. “Just ’cause you recommended me, doesn’t mean I’ll get it, you know. I’ve been recommended before. They keep me where I am for all the reasons you just listed,” he told Lucas with a shake of his head. He smiled slightly and said, “They put me with the difficult foremen.” “Many of those, are there? This is the first site you worked with me,” Lucas replied. Cooper shrugged and reached out to snag Lucas’s hand. “All foremen are difficult. It comes with the white hard hat.” Curling his fingers through Cooper’s, Lucas smiled. “I guess you’ll just have to see what Mark says about a white hard hat for you. I don’t see you being difficult, though.” His thumb moved back and forth, caressing the skin at the base of Cooper’s thumb. “Hmm,” Cooper responded. He wasn’t sure he wanted to be a foreman. Foremen were hated on principle, and he didn’t handle being hated well. “Don’t worry about it,” Lucas said quietly, standing slowly before bending and pressing his lips to Cooper’s forehead. “Don’t know what’s going to happen. Just concentrate on healing up. Can’t do anything until then, anyway.”
Under Contract | 115 Day 96
LUCAS loitered in the waiting room, as usual, only this time it was different. This time was the last time. A little more than three months after the accident, Cooper was getting a clean bill of health today, probably with orders to go back to work half time for a month just to ease back into the physically demanding job. Grimacing, Lucas shifted in the hard plastic chair again, only smiling when the nurse he knew on a firstname basis brought him a cup of coffee. A few minutes of chatting later, she headed back to work, and Lucas again was waiting. He’d had over three months of Cooper constantly in his life, and the last one especially had been a dream come true as Cooper got mobile again. They’d worked on Cooper’s house – well, Lucas worked mostly, with Cooper playing ‘foreman’ – they’d watched baseball in the evenings and made love nearly every night and sometimes in the morning, too. Cooper made him coffee in the mornings while drinking his juice. They shared the bed. Lucas made sure all the coffee mug handles turned the same way, and Cooper made sure when the guys came over they took their boots off outside. Lucas did the wash, Cooper did the folding. Lucas couldn’t have said when the last time he saw his apartment had been. It struck him now how damn domestic they’d gotten, him going off to work five days a week and coming home to dinner on the table. But they’d not talked about ‘what came next.’ Lucas had done his best to give Cooper that chance, and Lucas knew now that he loved him like crazy, and Cooper seemed awful damn fond of him as well. He’d purposefully not brought up the ‘what came next,’ hoping that nothing would change. Cooper shook the doctor’s hand as he was ushered out the door. His leg had healed well; a slight, probably permanent limp was all that remained. He had been given the go-ahead just as they’d expected, and he was grinning as he strolled up to Lucas. “Clear,” he said happily. “I can go to work Monday,” he beamed. Lucas couldn’t help but smile at Cooper’s happiness. He’d been chomping at the bit for at least two weeks now. “That’s great. I know
116 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux you’ve been wanting to get back,” he said as he stood up, thrilled to leave the plastic chairs behind forever. “Come on, you can buy me a beer or three,” Cooper cooed as he put his arm around Lucas’s shoulders and began leading him out of the office. “I didn’t get a chance to tell you, but I got a call this morning while you were at work,” he went on in a low voice as they walked together. “That girl at the Central Office that has a crush on me? She was trying to hint at a celebratory dinner, but she wound up telling me about your crew. She said about half of them left? I was worried about that.” The smile on Lucas’s face slowly melted, and he immediately tried to prop it back into place. “Yeah, well. The guys wanted to work right away, so about half of them went ahead and transferred. Can’t pass up the money, you know?” He hoped his voice wasn’t as shaky as it sounded to him. If he kept losing crew, he’d be reassigned. Or let go. It wasn’t something he really wanted to think about, so he’d not mentioned it to Cooper. “Are you being friendly to them?” Cooper asked pointedly, sliding his hand down Lucas’s back slowly as they made their way to the truck. Lucas’s face turned into a scowl. “Better than I used to be. Even Sanders said so, the little twerp. And Corey and Billy actually joke with me sometimes. I guess that helps. The contractors don’t look at me and make signs to ward off the devil anymore.” “They used to wait ’til you turned around,” Cooper snickered. “That’s good, though, you know? Makes it look like a lot of the mess was my fault, takes the heat off you,” he went on distractedly as he snagged the keys out of Lucas’s back pocket and headed for the driver’s side. “What mess?” Lucas asked. “The accident?” “No. The mess that the front office thought was our work site.” Stopping stock still next to the truck, Lucas thought he just might empty his stomach out on the asphalt. Central Office had thought his site was a mess? And he’d had no warnings, no memos on his most recent site, a small strip of retail that didn’t require a full crew anyway. Didn’t bode well for his continued employment, he thought distantly.
Under Contract | 117 “Hey,” Cooper said as he peered over the hood of the truck. “I told you. The blame was spread pretty evenly,” he said as he lowered his head and looked over at Lucas like a dog preparing to attack. “Everyone knows the shit that went down couldn’t have been helped, and so far as they know the only problem was that the foreman and the assistant foreman didn’t get along. Get in the truck.” Lucas got in the truck. He knew, intelligently, that Cooper was right. But as well as one part of his life was going, he just felt like he was on a collision course with something. He didn’t know what. He hoped desperately it wasn’t moving back into his apartment. He buckled his seatbelt, trying to resist the urge to look to Cooper for reassurance. “So,” Cooper grinned as he cranked the truck. “Want to go by your place?” he asked as he backed the truck up. He turned to look behind him and placed his arm across the passenger seat. His fingers brushed the back of Lucas’s neck and he turned the wheel with the other hand, letting himself enjoy the contact as the truck eased out of the parking space. Lucas’s face was blank as he turned to look at Cooper. “My place?” he asked faintly, glad the rush of air from the A/C covered most of the shakiness in his voice. “Yeah. We’re out this way, may as well go pick up some more stuff, right?” Cooper asked, oblivious to Lucas’s quiet panic. Lucas had to swallow hard to quell the fear as relief rushed through him. “Ah, sure. There’s not much left, really. I didn’t have a lot since I’d just moved here. Some furniture, kitchen stuff, towels, an old stereo, some dress clothes I never wear...” he rambled. Cooper licked his lips and nodded as he guided the truck through the parking lot and out into traffic. “What would you say about getting rid of all of that and saving some money on rent?” he ventured with a nervous glance over at his passenger. Unable to do anything but stare at the other man, Lucas opened his mouth once, shut it, and tried again. “Uh. Okay?” he put out there while inside he was screaming and jumping up and down in excitement. Cooper eased the truck to a stop at a red light and looked over at Lucas with a raised eyebrow. “Just okay?” he asked teasingly. “I don’t even get a kiss?”
118 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux Lucas swallowed as he flushed with heat. “I get you inside the apartment, and you’re going to get more than kissed,” he said, his voice a low purr. Cooper recognized that purr even if it hadn’t been promising him a good ravaging, and he grinned and shivered slightly. “I’ve never been in your apartment,” he responded in a low voice. “It’s nothing to write home about, believe me. I spent more time in the trailer than there,” Lucas said with a laugh. “It’s been quite a while since I’ve been there, you know.” He couldn’t take his eyes off his lover. His heart was pounding, and his pulse was racing, and just like he’d told himself over and over every time Cooper did something like this, he couldn’t love him any more than at this moment. “You have condoms there?” Cooper asked without missing a beat, trying not to smile as he drove. “Uh.” Lucas had to stop and think. “Maybe,” he said, scrunching his forehead as he tried to remember what was stashed in the garage-sale nightstand. “If you don’t, you realize what will happen, right?” Cooper warned. Lucas’s forehead scrunched up more. “Hmm?” Cooper responded as he risked a glance over. “I will be a very unhappy and horny puppy,” he told the man. “I may have to do unseemly things to you.” A smile started reappearing on Lucas’s face. certainly a threat to be afraid of,” he teased.
“Well.
That’s
They settled into a comfortable quiet, country music playing on the radio as Cooper drove across town. After about ten minutes, Cooper glanced over at the man again and raised an eyebrow. “Have you ever been tested?” he asked suddenly. Lucas’s frown was back. “Got in the habit my first few years in construction, getting tested before every new job. Just in case, you know, working with chemicals, getting cut up, that kind of thing. Why?”
Under Contract | 119 “Might be something to think about,” Cooper answered with a shrug. “We wouldn’t have to worry about condoms,” he murmured with another glance at the other man. Lucas swallowed hard, turning his chin to look at Cooper as he kept his eyes on the road. “That’s right,” he said tightly, his voice very low. Just the thought of sinking into Cooper with nothing keeping them apart, his cock was about ready to bust out of his jeans. Cooper smirked as he kept his eyes forward. “I gather from your ‘I’m about to come in my jeans’ tone of voice that you like that idea,” he finally grinned, biting his lower lip to keep from smiling too much. “You recognize the tone of my voice?” Lucas asked, squirming in his seat. Cooper managed not to blush. Much. “You have some very distinctive voices,” he answered with a smile, still not looking over at the man. Lucas found himself smirking as he leaned forward to try to see more of Cooper’s face. “You’re blushing,” he teased. Cooper licked his lips and gave Lucas a glance. “Shut up,” he laughed softly. “You like my ‘distinctive voices’?” Lucas said in a purposeful purr as he leaned toward Cooper. “I like all of you,” Cooper purred in return, hoping to get a reaction. He pulled into the parking lot of the apartment building he knew Lucas sort of half-ass lived at, and he reached over with one hand and grabbed the back of Lucas’s neck. “Which apartment was it?” he growled. Lucas pointed to the end unit. “12A – bottom end apartment,” he rasped, unbuckling the seatbelt so he could slide closer to Cooper. Cooper parked the truck nearly in front of the door Lucas pointed to and pushed it into park. “Come here,” Cooper snarled as he pulled Lucas closer and kissed him in broad daylight as they sat in the truck. Groaning against Cooper’s mouth, Lucas melted against him, hands sliding up to cup his face and the nape of his neck. He didn’t want
120 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux to pull back to take a breath, and he sure didn’t want to point out that anyone walking by could see them, but he knew he’d better. “Cooper –” he murmured against full lips. “Nick,” he breathed, trying to pull back just a little, but the other man kept kissing him. “I know,” Cooper growled with one last kiss. “Get inside,” he ordered as he shoved Lucas toward the other door and hopped out of the truck. Gulping for air, Lucas practically fell out of the truck and dug in his pocket for his keys as he managed to walk around the front end and step over the little shrubs. His hand shook as he tried the lock, but he got it on the second time, opening the door to the dark, musty-smelling apartment. Cooper pushed at his back and shoved him into the apartment. He slammed him up against the wall of the entryway and kicked the door closed. He pressed his body into Lucas’s and immediately reached for the man’s jeans and began to disrobe him roughly. “Fuck,” Lucas breathed, not even trying to help besides pulling at the buttons on Cooper’s shirt so he could touch warm skin. “You can either get on your knees and I’ll fuck your mouth until I’m happy,” Cooper rumbled into Lucas’s ear as he shoved his jeans down. “Or you can find condoms and lube really fucking fast.” Lucas was on his knees so fast he didn’t remember getting there, and he was pulling at Cooper’s fly and pushing fabric away before he could even inhale. Cooper groaned loudly and immediately grabbed the back of Lucas’s head, bracing his other hand against the wall as he tried to look down and see past his loose flannel shirt to what Lucas was doing. He didn’t even try to get his pants and boxers off; Lucas just pulled the material to the tops of Cooper’s thighs and closed his mouth around the hot, hard cock, putting his months of practice to immediate, gratifying work. Cooper’s grip tightened in Lucas’s hair and he cradled the man’s skull, holding his head – and more importantly his mouth – immobile as he began to push his hips forward. The other man just hummed and lifted his hands to hold Cooper’s hips, pulling him closer, encouraging him to thrust. Lucas had gotten addicted to this, being able to give Cooper this pleasure.
Under Contract | 121 Cooper groaned loudly and quickened his movements. With Lucas on his knees in front of him, his fingers digging into Cooper’s hips and humming around Cooper’s cock in a completely debauched scene of onesided pleasure, Cooper wasn’t likely to last long; he knew that. And so did Lucas. Digging his fingers into one hip, Lucas slid his other hand over the taut muscles of Cooper’s ass and slid his fingers between his legs, touching, stroking, stimulating, knowing it would be more than enough. Cooper cried out shamelessly, his fingers tightening painfully in Lucas’s hair. His gut clenched, and the pleasure billowed out from his groin into the rest of his body. For the first time since Lucas had ventured into this territory, Cooper didn’t cry out any warning before coming. Lucas shivered as Cooper climaxed, swallowing and licking and moaning, all the while holding Cooper steady while his lover rocked on his feet. Cooper folded over and his body jerked uncontrollably as he continued to cradle Lucas’s head and thrust shallowly into his mouth. “Fuck,” he breathed finally. He almost felt the need to apologize for having been overcome with passion and using Lucas as he had. But he knew he himself loved it when Lucas did that to him. “Fuck,” he repeated instead of the apology he had meant to utter as he leaned his weight heavily against his arm and the wall. The man kneeling in front of him chuckled and let the softening cock slip from his lips, and Lucas shifted forward to lap a little at the sweaty skin in the crease of his thigh. Cooper shuddered and gave a small whimper. “Your turn,” he panted with a gentle tug at Lucas’s hair to make him stop. “My turn?” Lucas chuckled as he stood up, still bulging out of his jeans and briefs. He leaned back against the door and pulled Cooper up against him, kissing him hard. “Let’s check for those condoms. I have an urge to fuck you through the wall.” Cooper groaned softly, his eyes falling shut and his lips parting as he slid his hands around Lucas to rest in the small of his back. “Yes, please,” he breathed as he let his jeans and briefs puddle around his ankles. Lucas leaned forward to bite Cooper’s neck and growl before grabbing his hand and leading the way into the bedroom. Bed room,
122 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux literally, holding a bed and a tiny, beat up nightstand. He stalked over and jerked out the drawer, dumping the contents on the floor. “Shit. No condoms,” Lucas ranted. Cooper stood in the doorway, his body feeling heavy and languid as he watched Lucas. “I’m clean,” he murmured suddenly. His body flushed with ice as he realized the implications of what he’d just said. But it was true. He was clean, and he knew he hadn’t been fucking anyone else. And he had no objections to trusting Lucas with the same. His head turning slowly, Lucas let Cooper’s words sink in. “I start a new site next week. I just had my usual tests. They came back all clear,” he said, voice thick with want and need and desire and something more. Cooper licked his lips, a rare moment of indecision striking him. Finally he began to unbutton his shirt and shrugged out of it as he got closer to the other man. “Come here,” he whispered as he dropped the shirt on the floor and crawled onto the end of the bed. Lucas’s brow furrowed, but he followed, sitting down on the edge and reaching to lightly caress Cooper’s cheek. As much as his body was screaming at him to get on with it, he couldn’t rush it. Cooper got to his hands and knees and crawled toward him, kissing him slowly and gently pushing him to lay flat on the bed. It was a moment like this that Cooper wished like hell he could say the words he knew Lucas wanted to hear. He could have said them, but they wouldn’t quite have rung true. He knew he could love this man. Might even already. But admitting it so soon, even to himself, felt too much like stretching the truth. He shoved those thoughts aside and straddled Lucas’s lap with another slow, languid kiss. Welcoming Cooper’s weight, Lucas let him push him back into the mattress, the kiss soaking into him and through him. The sharp edge of desire receded into a warmth that suffused him, and he curled his arms around the man. If he had a choice, he’d never let go. He hoped Cooper knew that. Because he’d tried very hard not to say it too often. He didn’t want to push. He wanted it to be real, if it ever happened, if Cooper ever loved him. In the meantime, this was incredible on its own. Cooper wasn’t entirely unaware of what Lucas wanted, and to his credit, he tried
Under Contract | 123 his best to give it to him. Trust and affection, lust and friendship, desire and need. It was something like love. Almost like love. Their kisses became more heated as Cooper pressed his body down against Lucas’s. If they didn’t go slowly then Cooper knew he would regret the absence of lubricant, but they had been doing this often enough that they wouldn’t need it unless they got carried away. He slid his way down Lucas’s body and tugged the man’s clothes out of the way before taking his cock into his mouth and swirling his tongue languidly. Groaning and closing his eyes, Lucas slid his fingers into Cooper’s long hair, dragging through it slowly, feeling it brush over the palms of his hands. Luckily he had some control now. “Bathroom,” he croaked. “In the medicine cabinet.” Cooper raised his head and looked up at the man with a small, evil smile. “Get these off,” he ordered hoarsely as he tugged at Lucas’s clothes and then pushed himself off the bed to head for the bathroom. Lying in place for a bit to catch his breath, Lucas sat up and pulled his shirt over his head, tossing it to the floor before swinging his legs over the side to kick off his trainers and peel away his socks before shucking his jeans. It was hard to keep from following Cooper into the bathroom to just jump him there. Some of their most passionate encounters had been in the shower. Cooper rummaged through the medicine cabinet and soon came up with what he was looking for. He stalked back out into the bedroom and practically tackled Lucas as he sat on the edge of the bed, plowing into him and kissing him roughly again as he pressed the tube into his hand. Lucas laughed, a happy sound, as he was shoved backward by his eager lover. The bottle pushed into his hand made it clear what Cooper wanted. Taking a breath, he grabbed Cooper around the waist and flipped him over, using his weight to hold him down. “This what you want, lover?” he purred. “Of course it is,” Cooper growled cheekily in return as he spread his legs wider and wrapped himself around the bigger man. Growling deep in his chest, Lucas dropped the bottle and pulled Cooper’s arms away, pushing them over his head. “Keep them there,” he
124 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux ordered as he took up the tube and started getting Cooper ready for him, stealing kisses all the while. Cooper’s fingers curled in the bedspread, and he arched into the caresses as he tried desperately to keep still. Slowly but surely Cooper had been working on Lucas’s confidence, trying to get him to assert himself a little more. And it had been working beautifully. Now he could count on a warning growl if he tried to move his hands, whereas before there would have been nothing. He could also count on Lucas to really and truly fuck him now that lube was involved. And God was it good when Lucas let go. “Want you now,” Lucas muttered, tossing the bottle aside and shifting between Cooper’s legs. Cooper groaned wantonly as Lucas pressed in just a bit and leaned over, trapping Cooper’s wrists with both hands as he laid his weight on the other man’s chest, then thrust in hard. Cooper hadn’t quite been expecting the brutal thrust, and he arched his body and cried out Lucas’s name plaintively. He writhed under the man to little effect because Lucas was just too strong when he had the advantage of being on top. Cooper groaned loudly and pulled his knees higher, wrapping his legs around the other man and hooking his ankles together in the small of Lucas’s back. “More,” he urged breathlessly as the feel of the man inside him, unhindered by the usual latex, finally got through his mental processors and made him whimper. Losing a bit more of his control, Lucas picked up the speed of his thrusts, keeping them even and hard, Cooper shaking each time their bodies slapped. He curled his fingers around Cooper’s wrists, pushing them into the mattress. Grunting with effort, he dropped his forehead to Cooper’s chest and muttered before he moaned. Cooper’s body arched with each thrust, trying simultaneously to get away from the intense pressure inside him and to lift his hips into it. He let his head fall back against the mattress, his eyes rolling back as another groan was torn from his throat. He was trying desperately to get his hands loose now, but Lucas’s grip was too strong, and Cooper was left to writhe beneath him, moaning and whimpering and breathlessly begging for more.
Under Contract | 125 Lucas’s lips moved in silent words as he kept up the pace, and he shifted his torso so he rubbed against Cooper’s cock with each thrust. His breathing was getting ragged, but Lucas was determined to make Cooper crazy first. The other man’s squirming, trying to get loose, made him feel so sure of himself. “Not going anywhere… you’re not going anywhere,” he gasped. “Oh, God,” Cooper responded in a tortured groan. He hadn’t really realized how much of a difference it would make, just mentally, to forego the condom. He could hardly form coherent thoughts now, much less words, as Lucas slid into him so easily over and over again. The idea of the man coming inside him hit him suddenly, and he moaned loudly and tightened his knees against Lucas’s ribs. “Please,” he gasped, panting as he continued to arch his back helplessly against the strength of the man above him. The squeezing and heat were getting to Lucas fast. “So hot… oh, fuck,” he moaned as his hips sped up. “Christ. Almost….” “Come inside me, Ted,” Cooper panted pleadingly, his voice a hoarse whisper as his toes and fingers curled involuntarily. Lucas cried out as his gut clenched at Cooper’s words, and he snapped his hips twice more before freezing – then he started to shake all over, head hung down, eyes focused on green ones dazed with pleasure. “Nick...” he hissed as he came, moving ever so slightly in and out with each contraction. Cooper forced his eyes to stay open long enough to hear his name, then he groaned and pressed his head back against the mattress, arching up and tightening all his muscles in order to torment his lover just a little bit more. “Sweet Jesus!” Lucas yelled, throwing back his head as he felt himself clench all over again, as if he’d hit another high. Cooper’s body was so close around him, he couldn’t escape the feeling of being claimed despite the fact that he was doing the fucking. Unable to support himself, Lucas gave a gasping mewl, trying not to let go of Cooper’s wrists and collapse on his lover as he rode the shocks that ravaged his body. Cooper tugged at his hands with a whimper, wanting desperately to wrap his arms around the man. With the last pull against his hands, Lucas
126 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux fell to his elbows, loosing Cooper’s hands and rubbing against him as he continued to slide in and out just slightly, groaning and clutching. Cooper’s hands went to Lucas’s hair, which had become his favorite handle over the last several weeks, slid his fingers through the man’s curls and wrapped around him. He pushed him sideways, forcing him out of his body and rolling both of them until they were facing each other. He began to kiss him languidly without ever saying a word, sliding one hand down his back possessively. Dazed beyond thought, Lucas just tried to move closer into the kisses, still shivering, one hand skimming over Cooper’s waist to stay close. Cooper groaned softly and breathed out heavily against Lucas’s cheek. “Was good,” he panted softly, his body still thrumming happily. Lucas choked slightly and managed to crack an eye open. “Good?” he said in hoarse disbelief. “I can hardly breathe! Christ. Good.” He leaned his forehead against Cooper’s shoulder, arm contracting to pull him closer, humming slightly as he felt Cooper’s heated, sweaty skin press against his. Cooper hooked his leg over Lucas’s hip and shuddered violently. “Very good?” he tried with a smile, otherwise speechless as he wallowed in the pleasure of the contact. Feeling something hard shove against his thigh, a slow, cat-whoate-the-canary smile transformed Lucas’s face. “Oh, verrrrrry good,” he drawled, shifting as he purred with satisfaction. “Beyond good,” he said, nipping at Cooper’s earlobe. “Great doesn’t even begin to describe it,” he said, stealing a kiss. “Incredible is just the tip of the iceberg,” he whispered in Cooper’s ear. It was times like this that he rambled, all to keep himself from telling Cooper, his Nick, how he loved him so very damn much. So instead, he talked. He teased. He waited. Cooper snickered like a little kid and nuzzled against Lucas’s cheek affectionately. “God, you’re adorable,” he laughed softly. Lucas’s heated smile pulled into one that could only be described as damn happy. “As long as you think so, that’s good enough for me.” He enjoyed the soft kiss, sighing in pleasure as he lifted his hand from Cooper’s waist and touched his shoulder, slowly sliding down his chest. “Niiiiiihh-iiiiick...” he whispered in a sing-song voice.
Under Contract | 127 Cooper raised his chin and smiled, biting his lip as Lucas’s hand dragged down his chest. “Hmm?” he answered innocently. He was, truth be told, content to remain there, cuddled up with the other man and nuzzling him. But he was definitely hard and his body was calling out demandingly for another release. Lucas chuckled darkly. “Little mister innocent here, trying to play it cool, aren’t you?” he said, hand still moving further down Cooper’s body. “Don’t you want to feel good, too? Or great?” He licked along Cooper’s jaw up to his ear. “Or absolutely fucking incredible?” “I always do,” Cooper answered without thinking, his body shivering at the touches, and his eyes closing as he tilted his head to the side slowly. Licking along the expanse of exposed neck, Lucas growled lightly as he bit down, then kissed the spot. He really, really wanted Cooper to fuck him silly. It had been a mind-blowing ride, and Lucas wanted Cooper to feel that, too. “That’s what I’m here for, you know,” he said persuasively. “You wouldn’t want to leave me lonely, would you?” he practically wheedled. Cooper moaned softly and let his hand come to rest along Lucas’s ribcage as he forced his eyes to open. “Are you actually suggesting that I attempt to fuck you right now?” he asked in slight disbelief. Lucas frowned, tilting his head. “Why not?” he retorted. Cooper looked down at the man with a smile, his body shaking with silent laughter. “Do you not remember quite recently sucking my brains out of my dick?” he teased. “Or subsequently fucking me into a puddle of goo?” Huffing, Lucas slid a hand to curl his fingers around an obvious sign of Cooper’s interest. “I think your goo is slowly recovering,” he said before rolling his eyes at himself and falling to his back, his eyes never leaving the gorgeous vision in front of him. He hoped to hell Cooper was making the best of his chance. Not that it mattered. Lucas would give him another. And another. And another…. Cooper rolled again and draped his body half on top of Lucas’s. He propped his head in one hand and used his other fingers to drift over Lucas’s skin. “You know,” he purred, “this isn’t the only time,” he told
128 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux the man, sensing a slight desperation to take advantage of their newfound freedom. “It’s not fleeting,” he growled softly as he bent his head to kiss Lucas’s impressively muscled chest. “Think of the money we’ll save on condoms,” he teased before nipping at sweaty skin. Lucas let out a low sigh of a laugh, pushing his fingers into Cooper’s hair, stroking through it over and over. “No, it’s not fleeting,” he murmured, honesty in his eyes. Cooper looked up and licked his lips, sliding closer and pushing himself up until he was hovering over the man. “Would it make you happy if I turned you over and fucked you senseless?” he asked in a low, growling voice. The corner of Lucas’s mouth quirked. “’Course it would. But I’m just as happy to hold you close, if you want,” he answered. Cooper pressed his body down into Lucas’s and hummed softly. “What I want is you,” he murmured before kissing the man slowly. “For a very… long time,” he whispered on a sudden impulse. Blinking when Cooper pulled back from the tender kiss, Lucas looked into his eyes while his heart tried to pound out of his chest. “As long as you want,” he whispered, moving one hand to cup Cooper’s cheek. “I think we’ve taken this about as far as it can go without a little more… permanency,” Cooper muttered in response, not quite believing he was saying the words and wondering if he would regret the decision later. He hoped not. “So here it is. I want you to come live with me. I want you to stay as long as you can tolerate me. And I want you to learn that coffee isn’t supposed to be mainlined in the morning and start drinking orange juice like normal people,” he told the man in a rush of words, the passion fading slightly as a new excitement filled him. Shock, disbelief, insane happiness and pure joy shot through Lucas until he thought he’d just break apart from all the emotions that bubbled up in him. He knew that Nick knew he was loved. Possibly desperately. For Cooper to be taking this chance, it had to be a sign! “Okay,” Lucas agreed shakily.
Under Contract | 129 “I mean it, Ted,” Cooper murmured as he ran his hands down the side of the man’s body. “I’m not just saying that to… I don’t know. I can’t… I think I might be a little bit in love with you.” The emotions threatened again and Lucas’s throat got tight. “I believe you,” he said, desperately trying to keep hold of himself. Christ, everything he’d wanted for months and months. Everything he hoped to have for the rest of his life. “You know I love you.” “I know,” Cooper answered with a smile. “I know,” he repeated in a low growl as he tightened his grip on the man beneath him. “You’ve done a damned good job of convincing me. Maybe now I can try and convince you that I’m worthy of it, hmm?” he purred as he began to kiss down Lucas’s face, moving along his chin and neck until he was slowly traveling down along his shoulder. Lucas drew in a sharp breath and grabbed under Cooper’s arms, forcibly pulling him back up so they were face to face. “You don’t have to convince me. I know you wouldn’t say it if you didn’t mean it. I wouldn’t have fallen for you so hard if I didn’t think you were worth it. And these past months have just confirmed that.” Cooper licked his lips slowly and nodded as his eyes remained locked with Lucas’s. He slowly slid his knee between the man’s legs and rested his body heavily on top of Lucas’s. “What do you want me to do?” he asked breathlessly, suddenly feeling a bit lost after making the impulsive confession. “Just be yourself,” Lucas said, smiling. “At the risk of descending into total mush – which, if you notice we’re already hip deep in –” He sighed and shook his head. “Be yourself, Nick. The man I love. That’s more than enough for me.” He leaned to kiss the tip of Cooper’s nose. Cooper growled softly in answer and ducked his head to catch Lucas’s lips suddenly. He used his knee to spread Lucas’s legs wider and rocked his hips into Lucas’s body slowly. “Mine,” he growled against Lucas’s mouth as he reached down and tugged at the back of Lucas’s thigh. “Christ, yes,” Lucas breathed, curling his leg around Cooper’s waist. “Wanted to say it,” he murmured during the kiss. He closed his arms around the other man, holding on tight.
130 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux Cooper reached clumsily for the discarded lube, still kissing Lucas possessively and using his other hand to hold himself up. He got hold of the tube and quickly set to preparing his lover as he continued to kiss him and growl softly. “Mine,” he practically snarled again as he tossed the lube away and pushed himself up. “Roll over,” he growled softly, tugging at Lucas and pushing his shoulder until the man was on his side. He tugged at Lucas’s knee and rolled him until he lay on his side. Cooper was already panting, his body throbbing with sudden need as he settled behind him. He pushed the head of his lubed cock in as he shifted just enough on top of Lucas to hold him down with his weight and groaned in amazement at how fucking good it felt. “Fucking Christ,” he ground out against Lucas’s shoulder. Lucas hands shook as he clutched at the sheets, trying to hold still and let Cooper in, and he finally took a gasping breath as he felt him. “Yours. Please, Nick, please, yours,” he begged, moving to try to get more of him. There was nothing else in the world that could capture Lucas’s attention now. Cooper pressed his weight down harder on him and slid his arm under Lucas’s knee to push his leg up. It was a position that forced him to go slowly, and he knew if he didn’t force himself to do so it would be over much too quickly. He rested his weight on his elbow and slid his hand into Lucas’s hair to give it a light tug. He couldn’t kiss the man, so instead he dragged his teeth over the skin of his shoulder and began to rock into him slowly. Whining wasn’t going to help, but Lucas couldn’t stop himself. He clutched at Cooper’s side, the slide and push stimulating him slowly, sending sparks through him again. “Nick,” he breathed. “I don’t ever want to give this up.” If Lucas expected him to be able to speak then he had seriously overestimated Cooper’s talent. He gave a huff in answer and brought his hand around the side of Lucas’s face to clap his hand over the man’s mouth. Obstinate and cheeky, Lucas licked Cooper’s palm heavily, dragging his tongue back and forth, even sticking it between his fingers and wetting the skin to his knuckles. Cooper groaned and gave a slight whimper as he pressed his forehead to Lucas’s shoulder and pushed ever
Under Contract | 131 deeper into him. He gave his leg another tug, twisting Lucas’s body even more, and he pushed up onto his hands and knees and growled loudly as the new position spurred him on. Grunting as he allowed Cooper to shift him around, Lucas turned his head to kiss Cooper’s temple, moaning quietly, soaking in the attention. Cooper panted against Lucas’s skin, his fingers digging into Lucas’s thigh. “Feels good,” he whispered against his cheek as his hips continued to move. He didn’t even try to fight off the pleasure, knowing nothing he could do would stop the way this felt. “Ted,” he whimpered as his body tensed in warning. “I’m here,” Lucas whispered. Cooper cried out in answer, his fist clenching in Lucas’s hair and his hips shoving into Lucas and rocking there as he emptied himself inside the man. “Oh, God...” Lucas groaned as he felt Cooper’s response, and clutched the blanket as Cooper spilled himself into him. Cooper collapsed against the man beneath him, panting against his sweaty skin and stroking his curls slowly almost like he would have done a dog for being good. He gasped when he pulled out, the sensations bordering on painful now as his exhausted body screamed for a rest. He crawled up Lucas’s body and kissed him brutally, pushing him until he was flat on the bed once more. “Good,” he repeated in a rough voice as he flopped onto the man, a tired smile tugging at his lips. Lucas didn’t even try to contradict him. “Yours,” he said quietly, sliding one hand into Cooper’s hair and dragging his fingers through the length of it. Cooper smiled softly and kissed him one more time, gently this time, before groaning quietly and flopping over. “It’s slightly masochistic of us both, you know,” he murmured as he lay on his back and stared up at the ceiling, his chest still heaving as he breathed in deeply after his exertions. A grin pulled at Lucas’s mouth as he turned on his side and leaned against Cooper. “You can handle it,” he murmured sleepily. Cooper stretched his arms out over his head and turned to look at the other man. He didn’t think Lucas understood. They were just begging for heartache now. Begging to be caught and outed. Begging to hurt each
132 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux other somehow. “Come here,” he huffed as he slid one arm under Lucas’s neck slowly and pulled him closer. He hoped he could handle it. Lucas rolled a bit more and settled his head against Cooper’s shoulder, turning his face into his sweaty neck. His free hand settled over Cooper’s heart, which he could feel still racing. “You cannot still be excited,” he murmured in wry disbelief. Cooper laughed softly and closed his eyes as he pressed his lips to Lucas’s forehead. “That’s terror you’re feeling,” he answered, his voice low and serious even though he was still smiling. Stiffening a little, Lucas pushed himself up on one elbow. “Terror?” he asked, tilting his head in question, although he suspected he knew what Cooper was talking about. “Just….” Cooper shrugged a little as he looked up at Lucas. “Never been here before, is all.” Nodding, Lucas laid back down, pressing a soft kiss to Cooper’s jaw. If Cooper didn’t have the same fears or experience he had, it wouldn’t be long before he figured them out. Then they’d see how long this would last. Lucas tightened his arm around him. Cooper lay there, breathing heavily still and staring up at the ceiling. What exactly had he just done? Day 142
LUCAS sat looking at the calendar, noting that about two months had passed since Cooper had asked him to move in. He sat now at a desk in one of the guest rooms where he’d been doing his paperwork, keeping it out of the way. After that day, the last day at his apartment, Cooper had been uneasy. Lucas had been able to tell. He wondered if the other man wasn’t sure about his decision. So he’d quietly held onto the apartment, just in case, keeping the lease. It wasn’t like money was a problem. No, he had another problem. A work problem, but not an income problem. More of a location problem. He was being transferred to another job site.
Under Contract | 133 Two states away. Lucas closed his eyes and rubbed them with one hand. He’d found out two days ago, and he still didn’t have any idea how to bring it up to Cooper. What would he say? Would it be an abrupt end to the best five months of his life? He leaned his head into both hands and groaned in near misery. Christ. A loud crash and the slamming of a door sounded somewhere in the house, followed almost immediately by a string of curses that, to a trained ear, could actually be made into coherent sentences. Apparently the person on the other end of the line, listening to Cooper rant, didn’t know how to translate. Lucas left the desk and jogged out to the main room, seeing Cooper stalking around the kitchen on the phone. There was glass shattered on the floor, crunching under his feet as he prowled back and forth, and Lucas wondered what could be wrong to make the usually eventempered Cooper lose it like this. “I don’t fucking care what excuse they’re giving you, you have their asses out there, tonight, or you’re all looking for new jobs come morning, understand?” Cooper was shouting into the phone, the growling undercurrent in his voice far more threatening than the level at which he was speaking. He turned to see Lucas standing there staring at him, and he snarled quietly and continued his pacing. “Don’t test me on this, George,” he warned the man on the other end of the line. “One hour,” he barked before ending the call and looking down at the phone in his hand calmly for a brief moment. Suddenly, he whirled and hurled the phone at the wall, watching it hit and shatter as he stood clenching his fists and trying to calm himself. Cooper’s first look at him made Lucas raise an eyebrow in surprise. The deal with the phone actually made the taller and bigger man take a step back. He thought about saying any number of things, but Cooper looked like he was ready to tear someone’s head off and shit down the hole. So Lucas stood there, hands in his pockets. After a moment of breathing in deeply and not thinking about anything but actively trying to get air, Cooper raised his head and turned it
134 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux slightly to meet Lucas’s eyes with a deep inhalation to calm himself. “And how was your day?” he asked in a calm, almost wry tone. Lucas sort of nodded. “Shitty. But I’m thinking it looks a little better now. Comparatively,” he said. Cooper huffed and looked back at the bits of phone and pursed his lips. “I have to go back to the site,” he sighed softly. “I plan to hide the bodies in the wet concrete.” “Sure, it’s usually foolproof. Just watch out for witnesses,” Lucas offered, practically dead serious. He looked over his lover. “Want me to bring you some dinner?” Cooper sighed softly. “No,” he groaned as he lowered his head and rubbed the back of his neck. “I’ve got thirty minutes. Tell me about your shitty day,” he muttered as he turned back to Lucas and began walking toward him slowly. “Sanders passed out again. Twice.” Lucas rolled his eyes. “Travis let a couple girls on the site, trying to get into their skirts while impressing them. And Billy hammered his thumb. That was all in the first hour.” “Idiot,” Cooper muttered in regard to Travis. The other stuff… well, it happened. He stepped up to Lucas and slid his hands around the man, pulling him closer and then resting his head on Lucas’s shoulder with a small whimper. The raise in pay from assistant to lead foreman had not been worth it. He missed having an actual life. Lucas slid his arms around him, offering his strength as support. He knew what Cooper was dealing with – he’d gone through it himself about five years ago. The change to lead foreman was huge, no matter how much experience you had. “You can do this,” he murmured against Cooper’s hair. “I don’t want to,” Cooper sulked. “Why don’t I just quit, and we can open up a candy store or something.” Chuckling, Lucas squeezed his arms tighter. He’d tell Cooper why that wouldn’t work, but now, when he had to go off to be a major hardass, definitely wasn’t the time. “I’m going to work on the room while you’re gone. Any idea what you want done next?”
Under Contract | 135 Cooper sighed heavily and shook his head. He didn’t want to tell the other man that working on the additional room had been a sort of cathartic process for him. He didn’t want to ask him not to do it or to wait for him. “Wood floors go down next, right?” he asked as he turned his head into Lucas’s neck and nuzzled at him. “Well, yeah. Isn’t there some drudge work I can do? I know you enjoy doing the real work,” Lucas said, tilting his head so Cooper could reach more skin. “I’ve watched you, you know.” Cooper blushed and smiled slightly, backing up and lowering his head. “You read my mind, don’t you?” he asked without looking up. “Well, it’s a closely guarded secret skill of mine,” Lucas said in mock humility. Cooper reached out and poked Lucas in the stomach. Hard. “Ow!” Lucas pouted and stepped back. “Behave,” Cooper chastised. He stepped forward and pulled Lucas to him again. “What else is on your mind?” he asked with a little purr as he brushed his lips over Lucas’s. “You, work, you, dinner, you, work, baseball, you, work, you...” he answered, easily fitting against Cooper’s body. “Take the work out of that and my life is heaven,” Cooper groaned as he pressed his lips to Lucas’s cheek. “I used to enjoy what I did,” he whined, heading for another massive sulk at full speed. “Seriously, we could open a pub,” he laughed softly. Lucas laughed. “Sure. Beer and baseball, our two favorite pastimes.” Then he frowned. “Well. Besides sex. But I’m sure as hell not sharing that,” he muttered, closing both hands around Cooper’s ass. “A sex bar!” Cooper beamed as he wrapped his arms around the man tighter. “We could make a fortune in bondage.” He snickered, really not wanting to leave in twenty minutes and go back to the site. “I told you, I’m not sharing,” Lucas growled, groping. “Besides, you need your energy to keep up with me.” He was hoping he could distract Cooper enough to at least send him off to work with a small smile on his face. Tomorrow was Sunday. Neither of them should have to
136 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux work, and Lucas knew he’d have to say something about the transfer. Tomorrow. “Oh, fine,” Cooper huffed as he stole a kiss. The impulse to initiate a quickie was quite strong at that moment, but Cooper merely growled and pulled back a little. “I guess I should get going,” he sighed. “If nothing else, I can take some time to calm down while I wait,” he finished through gritted teeth. Lucas leaned forward to steal a kiss from the tightened lips. “I’ll be here when you get back,” he said. “Yeah,” Cooper growled. “Be here naked, yeah? With beer. And tape the game,” he snickered. “And you think I’m going to disagree with that?” Lucas said in a shocked voice. “No, that’s why I love you,” Cooper laughed with another kiss before turning away to head for the refrigerator. The words he had just said went completely over his head. Lucas froze. Completely froze – not even breathing. He watched Cooper walk away, and he tried to say something, but nothing would come out. As Cooper pulled out a bottle of water, Lucas wondered if he’d even realized what he’d said. Christ. What must he look like, standing there gawking like the first night he came here? Cooper looked up as the refrigerator fell shut and blinked at Lucas. “You okay?” he asked worriedly. “Uh,” Lucas said intelligently, before shaking his head to snap out of it. “Yeah. Yeah, I’m good. Just going to miss you tonight.” He hoped that was plausible enough a recovery. He couldn’t point it out now. Cooper had to get out to the site, and he had a feeling it would be a long… protracted… lengthy… stretched-out conversation. Cooper narrowed his eyes suspiciously but let it go. “Okay,” he murmured as he prowled back over and kissed Lucas again. “If I’m not home by midnight… hell, just leave me there,” he moaned as his shoulders slumped pitifully. Shaking his head, Lucas took him by the shoulders, turned him toward the door, and popped him on the ass. “Get going. Sooner you
Under Contract | 137 finish, sooner you get back to baseball and beer,” he said as lightly as possible. “You better be naked when I get home or we’re talking serious shit fit,” Cooper warned as he trudged to the door. “And don’t touch that fucking glass, I’ll clean it up when I get home,” he added, reminded of his last serious shit fit. Lucas chuckled, eyes fixed on Cooper. dear,” he teased.
“Anything you want,
“Shut up. Bastard,” Cooper growled before the screen door snapped shut behind him. Moving to the door, Lucas stood there in the twilight and watched Cooper get into the truck and drive off. Once he walked in and shut the door, he lost his knees and sank to the floor, swallowing hard. That’s why I love you, he’d said. Lucas was sure he hadn’t dreamed it. Closing his eyes, he thought about the transfer and felt vaguely ill.
THE cicadas were in full swing when Cooper returned that night. It was the sort of night he loved. The sort of night that required a beer and sitting out on the deck or watching the game with the windows open. He tried to enter the house quietly, but the screen door was a screamer, and it squeaked loudly as he pulled it open. Cooper winced as he stepped into the house and peered around, trying to decide if Lucas was still up or not. Lucas heard the screen door from where he sat out on the patio in the dark in his shorts, just some citronella candles lit and a beer in his hand. “I’m out back,” he called tiredly. He had thought about what to say all night. His decision was to get Cooper into bed and to sleep and to bring it up tomorrow. Somehow. Cooper reached into the refrigerator and grabbed a few beers, then headed out to the other deck and stood at the door for a moment. Looking over at the dark form of his lover, the candlelight flickering over tanned skin, something felt a little off. “You okay?” he asked with a small frown as he stepped outside and walked slowly over to sit across from the man.
138 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux Tilting his head, Lucas looked at Cooper as he took another drink. He didn’t really want to answer that question. It would only lead to more questions. “Things go okay at the site?” he asked instead. “If you mean did I kill anyone, no,” Cooper answered. “I mean, yeah. Things went okay,” he answered as he rubbed his face, eyes bleary. “You’re exhausted. Ought to go to bed or you won’t be able to stay awake during the game tomorrow,” Lucas said, a hint of smile on his face. “Honestly? I’d rather sit out here and enjoy the music,” Cooper murmured as he sprawled in the deck chair and waved his beer at the darkness. Lucas would have laughed, but he knew exactly what Cooper was talking about. It was the same reason he was out here. The quiet, the cicadas, the frogs at the pond nearby, the brush of the wind through the pines. It was comforting in a way not much else was. He leaned his head back again, wondering how in the world he’d tell Cooper about the transfer. He didn’t even know where to start. Cooper leaned forward and placed his beer against the table, chopping down on the cap and popping it off with a grunt. “I’d really love it if you would tell me what’s bothering you,” he murmured, leaning back and flopping into the comforting embrace of the lounge chair and the warm night. Turning his head on the back of the chair to look at Cooper, Lucas tried to stave off the slight pangs of panic. He wasn’t ready for this…. “You’ve had plenty to worry about tonight,” he said in response. “It’s nothing that can’t wait until tomorrow.” Cooper stared at the man expectantly in the flickering light of the candles. That meant he was right, and there was something weighing pretty heavily on Lucas’s mind. “Give me a little credit, huh?” he finally asked in disgust. “What’s going on?” Lucas flinched and turned his head away. Seemed like Cooper could read him pretty well. He tapped his beer on his leg for a long moment, then just quietly said it. “I’ve been given a transfer.”
Under Contract | 139 “Oh, yeah?” Cooper asked in surprise, fighting off the uneasy feeling Lucas’s tone of voice was giving him. “Where to?” he asked evenly. Lucas’s jaw clenched and despite his misgivings, he again looked over at Cooper. “Oklahoma City.” Cooper literally felt his heart drop at the words. breathed as he sat up again and leaned closer. “When?”
“Shit,” he
Unable to sit still any longer, Lucas shoved himself up out of the chair and paced to the railing. “End of next week.” Cooper sat staring at Lucas’s back, unable to process it. “That’s… soon,” he murmured stupidly. “Yeah,” Lucas said, looking off into the dark. Cooper stared up at the dark outline for another moment, feeling the loss keenly already. “Quit,” he whispered softly. “Quit and stay here.” Lucas’s back stiffened. expecting that answer.
“What?” he asked in surprise, not
“Quit. You hate the job anyway, right?” Cooper asked hopefully. “Hell, money’s not a problem if you get rid of the damn lease on your apartment,” he added in irritation. “How’d you know about that lease?” Lucas asked as his head whipped around. Cooper flushed slightly and shrugged. “I accidentally opened one of your letters one day,” he admitted. “I was on the phone, not paying attention… I would have understood,” he murmured accusingly. Lucas just pressed his lips together and leaned back on the rail. “I don’t hate my job,” he said, trying really hard not to jump to conclusions. Why did Cooper want him to stay? Had he realized later what he’d said earlier that evening? Cooper sighed softly and lowered his head. “So,” he sighed almost angrily. “That’s it, then, huh?” he murmured as he rolled his beer bottle in his hands.
140 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux The ill feeling returned full force. Cooper would let him go just that easily. Apparently what he’d said had just been… words. But after all this time, Lucas couldn’t let go so quickly. “It doesn’t have to be,” he tried. “How do you mean?” Cooper asked in confusion. He didn’t want Lucas to go. He ached just thinking about it. But he was slowly getting angry, and he wasn’t quite sure why. Maybe the fact that Lucas had never really let go of that apartment had hurt him more than he realized. Or the fact that he’d obviously known about this transfer for a while and never said anything. All the initial uncertainty came rushing back, and Cooper began to feel like maybe love had never been the right word after all. “You hate your job. You could quit and come with me,” Lucas said, though he really didn’t expect Cooper to agree. He could read the emotions playing over Cooper’s face. Anger. Hurt. Maybe even regret. He knew then that it was going to end, unless he gave in. But he couldn’t. Not anymore. Not without knowing why Cooper wanted him to stay. It was the same reason he’d kept the apartment. Cooper had given him no solid reason to stay. Cooper blinked at the man and opened his mouth to respond, but he could think of nothing to say. Finally, he shook his head and asked, “You want me to, what… sell my house? Just up and move?” Good answer, Lucas thought silently. He looked back out into the dark stand of trees and let his heart go. “Why should I stay, Nick?” Cooper’s body went cold as he watched the man turn away. What was this, a shakedown? “Christ,” he huffed as he stood up suddenly. “You never really did believe any of it, did you?” he asked, his anger stemming from exhaustion and shock and just plain heartache. “You kept one foot out the door all this time, right from the beginning. More willing to go than to stay,” he sneered with a wave of his beer bottle. “You know what, Ted? Take your transfer. It’ll save us both a lot of antacid.” Although it hurt, Lucas turned to look at him. He still loved Cooper. Despite this turn, despite knowing that if the other man didn’t love him now, he likely never would. He walked past Cooper to the door, pausing on the threshold. “I had everything to lose here, Nick. I knew
Under Contract | 141 that,” he said evenly. “Right from the beginning.” And he disappeared into the house. Cooper watched him go with his head down, his entire body aching. He walked out to the railing of the deck and stared off into the darkness as he tried to resign himself to this sudden killing blow.
LUCAS had been with Cooper 151 days when he packed up his belongings and stowed them in his truck. Surprisingly, there wasn’t much, once he started looking around. Clothes, a few books, some CDs. He thought he understood a little more what Cooper had been saying – Lucas had never really settled here or made a mark. No sharing a closet or drawer space. No books mixed up on the shelf, no posters or art or personal effects. He wondered if holding back that last bit of himself had been a bad idea. He decided it wouldn’t have helped. Glancing at the clock, Lucas knew he could wait. There wasn’t really any reason to leave now as opposed to once Cooper came home from work. But the last eight days had been tense. Painful. Even cold. As if he was already gone. And he didn’t want to hear Cooper… Nick… telling him again to leave. Picking up the last box, he thought about leaving a note. But what would he say? Thanks? So long, best wishes? I don’t want to leave, but you don’t want me to stay for the right reasons? No. He’d messed up too far back to fix it now. It was too little, too late. Lucas winced at the cliché. He looked around the kitchen one last time for anything he’d left behind, but there was nothing. And he supposed that was just as good a way to end it. Cooper had said he’d kept one foot out the door. Might as well end it that way. He walked out, shutting the door firmly behind him, got in the truck and drove away. He was a hundred miles down the road when he admitted that he had left something: the other half of his heart.
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WHEN Cooper got home that night it was to a cold, empty house. It wasn’t as if he hadn’t lived this way for nearly fifteen years before Lucas had come along. It wasn’t as if he was unfamiliar with the hollow sound of his footsteps and the echo of the cicadas from outside. He could almost have convinced himself that the last five months had been meant to be temporary. He walked through the house slowly, noticing the bits that were now missing. There wasn’t much. The impact was nothing more than an outline of the man who had occupied Cooper’s bed. He made his way slowly back into the kitchen. This was a situation that required beer. No, not beer. Hard liquor. He went to the cabinet and reached up to grab the bottle of scotch he kept there, but his eyes fell on the shiny blue bag on the shelf below the bottle instead. A bag of coffee. Cooper’s stomach lurched and his chest twisted painfully. He reached up and took the bag of coffee, closing his eyes as the smell assaulted him. With a low, growling sound he turned and threw it as hard as he could with a pained shout, then sank to his knees right there in the kitchen and curled up with a choked sob.
“GODDAMNIT, Johnson! I told you three times! Don’t use that drill for the four-bys or you’ll put the damn screw through your hand!” Lucas yelled, scattering a few workers. Several more stayed, though, just keeping their heads down and pitying the idiot who’d gotten Lucas mad. Since the new foreman had arrived, he’d quickly established himself. He was well-trained in all aspects of their work, willing to get dirty just like the rest of them, a real hardass when someone screwed up. But he was fair, he learned all their names and used them, and he didn’t bawl someone out just for existing. So most of the crew liked him well enough, and he was invited for beer a few times a week. Completely ignorant of the crew’s opinion, Lucas just kept himself focused on the work. He’d tried to take a page from Cooper’s example – being a little more human – and it actually worked. He’d even gone for drinks a few times. But mostly, he worked in the trailer at night, on paperwork, on planning, on the endless lists of things to do. There was
Under Contract | 143 always enough to keep him busy until he passed out on the couch or even slumped over the desk. It also served to keep him from thinking too much. The sharp loneliness ached and ached, but thinking about it just made it worse. He’d waved off the guys and locked up the site some hours ago, retreating to the trailer for more work, although he did turn on a Cardinals game in the background. He’d tipped his head forward on his arms, just to rest his eyes for a moment, and he was out like a light. The sleeping man didn’t hear the crunch of gravel in the lot outside. Nor did he hear the soft rattle of the chain link fence as someone deftly climbed over the locked gate. He didn’t hear the careful footfalls on the loose gravel, or the soft thump of the man walking up the steps to the trailer. Lucas was sound asleep when the door opened quietly and his unannounced visitor stepped inside. Nick Cooper stood there in the darkness, heart racing with nerves and adrenaline, and he tried to decide how safe it would be to wake a sleeping Lucas. The hard work and lack of sleep was clear on Ted’s body and face. He’d visibly lost weight, and the planes of his face were sharp and shadowed, especially under his eyes. He’d shorn his hair into nearly a crew cut, getting rid of the curls. And he was sprawled uncomfortably, far gone into uneasy dreams. Cooper’s heart ached to see him looking so exhausted and… different. He moved closer, knowing he risked personal injury if he startled the man. But he wasn’t able to resist kneeling beside him and reaching out to ghost his fingers over the short hair. After a long moment, Lucas shifted slightly, taking a deeper breath, but he didn’t wake up. He sighed as if hurting and breathed a word. “Nick.” Cooper flinched away from the whisper, the hair on the back of his neck standing on end as a shiver ran through him. He gazed at the man as he knelt beside him, taking in his features, remembering the way he felt and smelled and sounded. God, he had missed him. And the gust of air
144 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux that had formed his name gave him that last bit of reassurance he had been missing when he had started driving last night. He stood up and carefully took a blank piece of paper from Ted’s desk. It had the company’s header on it, but somehow that made it all the more appropriate. He took the pen that lay beside Ted’s head and wrote quickly, then slid the note closer to make sure Ted would see it when he woke. With one more longing glance, he began to back away toward the door. It was about four hours later when Lucas woke up, at 3 a.m., groaning at the crick in his neck and the ache in his back. Cursing himself for falling asleep over the damn desk again, he tried to stretch carefully. When his arms were fully extended over his head, he opened his eyes and saw a piece of paper that had writing on it. He frowned and picked it up, and immediately stiffened when he recognized the handwriting. What in God’s name...? I have a job offer for you. Meet me at Denny’s when you wake up. Nick’s writing. It was Nick’s handwriting. Lucas stared at the paper. In the past month he’d quit thinking of Nick as “Cooper” – it just didn’t fit the image in his head anymore. Cooper had been his coworker. Nick had been his lover. And now, out of thin air, this paper appeared on his desk. He turned his head to glance out the door, but he knew he’d left it open to get a cool breeze in the trailer. He shoved back from the desk, paper in one hand, and opened the screen door to look out toward the parking lot. Nothing. He looked down at the paper. Then he grabbed his keys. Cooper picked Denny’s for two reasons. One, of course, was the fact that Ted would likely know who had left the note if he didn’t recognize Cooper’s scrawl. And two, he’d passed it on the way in and knew where it was. He now sat in a corner booth with a paperback novel and a glass of orange juice, waiting. Patiently. He would have waited all night and day, if need be. Lucas parked, turned off the truck and sat there. He looked at the somewhat crumpled paper in his hand again. A job offer? Did Nick get the company to agree to transfer him back to Birmingham? But for what
Under Contract | 145 reason? And why would he have come himself? Lucas rubbed his eyes, trying to wake up. He wouldn’t be able to think of all the answers. For that he had to go inside. Just inside the door, he stopped, looking around, almost afraid to see the other man after so long. What would he say? What could he say? Then Lucas saw him, and all thought stopped. Cooper had stopped looking up with every opening of the door about two hours ago. His knee bounced now, and he had switched to soda for the caffeine value. But something made him glance up from his book, a feeling of eyes on him. He looked up and met the man’s gaze with an outward calm that came more from driving all night and being exhausted than any control over the butterflies. Oh God. Those eyes. That dark hair. Lucas froze in place, feeling everything – the aching, the longing, the love – it all came flooding back. He looked away when the waitress asked him if he wanted a table, and he told her he was joining the guy in the back and to please, please bring some coffee. She nodded with a smile and walked off, leaving Lucas to find his way. And he did, slowly, stopping just a few feet from the table. Cooper held to the book in his hands to keep them from shaking, and he looked up at Ted with a nervous lick of his lips. “You look like hell,” he finally greeted, his knee bouncing uncontrollably under the table. Shrugging, Lucas shoved his hands in his pockets, rediscovering the paper in his hand and looking at it. Then he held it out. “What’s this about?” he asked, his voice tired. He wanted so, so much just to crawl into Nick’s lap and curl up and cry for joy that he was here. But he couldn’t. Shouldn’t. “Just what it says,” Cooper answered calmly, pressing his lips together and glancing down at the paper. “I miss you,” he said suddenly. “I want you to come back to Birmingham.” It was too close to what he remembered of that night for his comfort. That was still no reason. Not really. He missed Nick like hell every day. Every minute. He’d really left something of himself behind when he’d left Alabama. The waitress’s arrival with his coffee broke the tableau, and he slowly sat down opposite Nick.
146 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux Lucas knew he had to hear him out; he’d always have doubts if he didn’t. “What’s the offer?” he asked, dropping the paper on the table. He meant more than just the job. Cooper looked at the crumpled paper for a long, tense moment before dragging his eyes up to meet Ted’s. “Me,” he answered softly. The blank mask Lucas had worn for over a month now finally cracked, and some of the agony he felt showed through. “You can’t know how much I want to believe that,” he rasped, hands clutching the edge of the table. Cooper bit his lower lip, his exterior still calm even while his insides fluttered with nerves and heartache. The last months had been the worst he’d ever lived, he was sure of it. Even the loss of his parents as a teenager hadn’t been so hard to deal with. Losing them hadn’t been his fault. Losing the man who now sat across from him, that had been entirely on his shoulders. “I quit my job,” he told Ted softly, watching his reaction carefully. Lucas sat back a little, his hands loosening their hold on the table. He tried not to let the little sliver of hope inside him show. It would hurt far too much if he was let go again. “Why?” he finally asked. “Because I hated it,” Cooper answered immediately. “Because they didn’t like the whole ‘I think I’ll leave now’ thing. Because I’ve been thinking about this idea,” he went on thoughtfully, “where me and this guy I know start our own business and don’t have to deal with the headaches and the transfers and the pressures,” he murmured. A pause. “Because if I need to sell my house and move to Oklahoma, it’s easier if I don’t have a job to hang onto.” The painful clenching in his chest and gut was almost Lucas’s undoing. But he forced himself to brazen it out. He’d endured enough emotional pain so far, he could deal with this, too. “Move to Oklahoma,” he repeated, rather than asking another question. It just wasn’t in him to prompt Nick. If he had something to say, he’d have to come out with it on his own. Lucas had nothing left to give. He’d left it all behind in Birmingham.
Under Contract | 147 Cooper cocked his head, the lack of reaction hammering at his confidence. “Are you happy here?” he asked softly. “You don’t seem happy. You don’t go home.” Lucas’s most recent vow to himself went right out the window. “Why do you want to know?” he asked, not even trying to hide the hurt in his voice anymore. “Because I love you,” Cooper murmured. “I just want you happy.” He’d always thought hearing that would make everything better. That the hurt would just disappear, and he’d be happy again. But now, he knew better. It just hurt more, because now he wanted to beat Nick about the head and shoulders for putting him through hell. His eyes burned, and he squeezed them shut, hanging his head. “Damn you,” he muttered. Well, that hadn’t been the response he had hoped for. “I’m sorry,” Cooper murmured. Lucas looked up, hurt and exasperation and disbelief all mixed up in his dark eyes. “You couldn’t have told me this ten weeks ago?” he asked mournfully. “I had to live in hell to get to hear this?” “I wasn’t… sure,” Cooper murmured hesitantly. “It took missing you to… I’ll do anything to get you to come home. Look,” he said desperately as he held up his hand, cut palm facing the other man. “I’m even going to need a tetanus shot from breaking into your work site.” Although his eyes moved to Nick’s hand for just a moment, they were fastened right back on his eyes. “It hurt, Nick,” he said clearly. “I lost a part of myself to you that I’ve had to live without.” “So did I,” Cooper responded, a cold calm sneaking over him. He had told himself that the possibility of Ted rejecting him when he came here was very real. He had tried to prepare himself for it. But he supposed hope always won out over reality. The realization that Ted was too angry to care was hitting him harder than he was ready for. Lucas hoped that noise he heard was hope pounding at the door. “What did you lose, Nick? I need to know. I need to know if there were times in the day that you’d just stop and think of me for no reason. If you turned over at night and hugged a pillow, then woke up disappointed. If sometimes you missed me so much that you couldn’t breathe. Because
148 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux that’s how it was for me. That’s how much I love you. There is no part way.” “I never stopped to think about you,” Cooper murmured without batting an eye. “I never stopped thinking about you at all. And I never woke up disappointed because I’ve barely slept. I ache inside. I can’t eat. I can’t breathe,” he said softly, the low tone of voice conveying more emotion than if he’d been on his knees and sobbing. “I can’t sit still in my own skin without knowing you’re going to be there.” It was a long, strained, silent moment before Lucas took up Nick’s hand, seeing what must have been at least a moderately painful, jagged wound. “You climbed the fence, didn’t you?” he said gently. He kept hold of that hand, sliding his palm against Nick’s and curling their fingers together. “I want to be there, Nick. I love you. I just needed to know that you loved me, that it wasn’t going to end.” Cooper winced and looked away, taking a deep breath to steady himself. “I thought you’d never believe the words, even when I could say them,” he muttered. “You were always just… waiting.” “Waiting for you,” Lucas confirmed. “And if we weren’t in this damn Denny’s, I’d show you just how much I believe you.” Cooper’s gaze slid back to meet Ted’s, hope and surprise warring for dominance in the green eyes. “Will you please come home?” he pleaded. “I vacuumed up your coffee, but we could get you more.” “Christ. Fuck the coffee. I’ll drink juice the rest of my life, if you want me to,” Lucas swore as he covered their entwined hands with his other. “And home sounds really, really great. I’ve missed it almost as much as I’ve missed you.” Cooper smiled, a genuine, exhausted, foolish grin as his heart started doing jumping jacks. He pulled Ted’s hands closer and kissed his knuckles. “I love you,” he repeated, rubbing his cheek against the man’s fingers and closing his eyes like a cat on a scratching post. He had missed this man’s hands so very much. Lucas couldn’t help but chuckle. “C’mon, let’s get out of here,” he suggested contentedly.
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A loud clang, crash, crunch and tinkle was not what Lucas wanted to hear on a bright and sunny Monday morning. Not at all. He stood from leaning over the drafting table, left the blueprints, and emerged from under the awning. He stalked around the house and stopped in his tracks. “Goddammitalltahell! What’s going on out here?” he yelled at the top of his lungs. Everyone stopped. Some looked confused, some looked amused, and some had that ‘deer-in-the-headlights-oh-my-God-I’m-going-to-die’ look on their faces. “Oh, just go back to your little drawing,” Cooper huffed with a wave of his fingers and a smirk as men scurried to get the mess cleaned up. Lucas narrowed his eyes and crossed his arms. “And how am I supposed to draw straight lines with these loud crashes distracting me, huh?” he asked, raising an eyebrow sharply. “Use a ruler,” Cooper suggested without looking up. He jammed his shovel into the ground and then he did look up, eyes sparkling mischievously as he left the boys to clean up the spill and began sauntering over to where his lover stood. “You’re so cute when you’re huffy,” he whispered when he got closer. Mouth twitching as he tried to hold back a smile, Lucas deliberately huffed and tried to make a mean face. “You’re going to make them think I’m a nice guy,” he muttered. Cooper gasped theatrically and then grinned. Most of the men working for them now had come with them from the construction company. Only a few were new hires, but they all seemed to be decent guys. And they were busy. Thank the Lord, they were busy. Nearly half a year after going into business for themselves, they were, in fact, one of the most sought-after private construction crews in Birmingham. “What do you want for dinner tonight?” Cooper asked in response, completely changing the subject and blatantly attempting to distract Ted from the sweeping of glass going on behind him. Suspiciously, Lucas tried to look behind his lover and sighed when Nick just moved to block his view. So he looked up at the gorgeous face
150 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux and eyes in front of him instead. “I was thinking maybe Mexican. I have a taste for fajitas,” he said, dropping his arms to stuff a hand in one pocket. It still amazed him, to this day, that Nick was his. And he was Nick’s. They confirmed it to each other often, sometimes with just a look. It was everything he’d ever dreamed. Even such mundane things as deciding on dinner made him unusually happy. Cooper snickered a little and nodded. “Get back to work, boss,” he murmured in a low voice that he knew Ted would recognize as a seductive one as he stepped just a little closer. He had every intention of sending him back to his drafting table with dirty thoughts in his head. “I’ll come get you if there’s blood,” he teased. Lucas’s nostrils flared as he caught the tone of Nick’s voice. He knew full well it was a distraction tactic, but he enjoyed it so much that he didn’t care when Nick used it. Which was often. He shifted uncomfortably, his jeans getting tight. “You do that,” he answered, meeting Nick’s eyes with more than fond affection in his own. Cooper grinned cheekily and winked at the man. “Later, boss,” he said casually as he turned to go back to work, knowing Ted would be there when he was done. Lingering to watch Nick walk away for just a moment, Lucas forced himself to turn around. While he certainly had the right to ogle all he wanted, it just wouldn’t do for the crew to see him doing it. Extensively. Adjusting his belt, he went back to the work and the life he loved.
BANGING his head against the back of the seat, Elliot Cochran took another drink of Gatorade and huffed. Flippin’ interstate. Flippin’ cars that won’t stay in their own lanes. Flippin’ SUVs that kept cutting him off, having no respect for the law of bigness. Elliot growled and hit the large steering wheel with his fist and geared the semitrailer down into first again. He was stuck. Stuck in a massive snarl of traffic around Kansas City that looked to twist and turn for miles and miles ahead. “Gridlock. Quicksand. Cage. Stuffed phone booth.” Groaning, Elliot flipped on the CB and hit the button for channel 19, hoping to hear some chatter with news about the backed-up traffic. An hour ago, there’d been no warning of any problems, so whatever had happened had to be recent. “Breaker one nine, this is Millis 531 on 435 west around Bright Lights about ten miles short of 35 South, any word on the backup? Come back.” There was random chatter over the channel, but finally a clearer voice came back. “Breaker one nine, this is McLean 417, heading east on 435. Looks like somebody’s greasy side up in the grass. Get comfortable.” “Aw, geez,” Elliot muttered crankily before he pressed the button on the handset to talk again. Cars flipped in the median were always a mess to clean up. “Thanks, McLean. Lovely day for roasting in a tin can.” “You downwind of a chicken carrier, Millis?” the man on the CB asked with an obvious smile. “I’m watching one try to squeeze outta its cage. They’re more bendy than you’d think.”
Elliot had to laugh cynically. “I am not so lucky, McLean. Clear, boring view of four-wheelers as far as the eye can see. I just might kick back and take a nap. They’re all cutting in front of me anyway.” “Nah, keep your eyes open. Sometimes ya get a free show when it’s like this.” “Sunroofs are good for that,” Elliot agreed. “Or bad, depending.” “Usually bad,” the man on the CB agreed with an almost audible wince. “Oh, he got loose! Run, chicken, run!” he cried, sounding like he had pulled the CB away from his mouth as he spoke, before breaking into a gleeful laugh. “I love my job,” he informed Elliot, still laughing. Elliot cracked a smile, clicking the spring on the handset button to hold it on. “Run, chicken, run,” he half-snorted, rolling his eyes. The man on the other end of the CB was still laughing when the line went to static once more. It was silent for several moments before he came back on again, wheezing and snorting as he tried to catch his breath. “This guy is losing all his chickens,” he barely managed to say. “He’s out of his truck, trying to round ’em up! Oh, God… I should probably help him,” he cackled. Elliot snorted. “Careful, man, you don’t want to get pecked. On the other hand, it’s hot enough you could probably grill it on the engine.” “I’m not getting out there,” McLean laughed finally. “Chickens are mean,” he mused. “How’s the traffic look beside you, Millis?” “Nothing going your way at all, must be where you’re backed up,” Elliot said, voice turning sharp and annoyed again. “I’m seeing nothing but tops.” There was a grunt in response and then a loud huff. nothin’,” the man said in a disgruntled voice.
“I got
Elliot sighed as some more drivers came onto 19 for a traffic update. “10-27 to one six for a talker, McLean, if you’re interested. I’m out.” He left the widely used channel 19 and went to 16, where some casual chatter wouldn’t be a bother to much of anyone. “Breaker, this is McLean, you out there, Millis?” Elliot opened a fresh bottle of Gatorade. “I gotcha, McLean. Why don’t you tell me your life story? We probably got more than enough
time.” He turned in his seat to flop back against the door and propped his feet up in the opposite chair with a grimace. “My other car is a ’67 Mustang,” the man answered, deadpan. Elliot snorted. “Little hard to drag it on the trailer,” he pointed out. “You ought to try riding a donor.” “If you knew me and my injury track record better, Millis, you’d bite your tongue for speaking such things,” McLean responded sadly. “I broke my nose once putting on a motorcycle helmet.” “That does not inspire confidence in your driving skills, McLean.” There was a long, static-filled silence in response. Finally, the man came back and said, very seriously, “Broke my finger on the wheel, once.” Then he began to snicker quietly. Elliot raised a brow and bit his lip. He could imagine what the guy had been doing, too. “Gotta watch out for carpal tunnel,” he answered, biting back a laugh. “You got a dirty mind, Millis,” the man replied with a longsuffering sigh. Elliot took a drink of Gatorade and shrugged like the other man could see him. “What else is there to do with so much time on our hands? Heh.” “Make bad puns,” McLean suggested wryly. “Come back? Hot cross buns? You that eager for a chicken sandwich, McLean?” “That’s why they don’t let me haul beer,” McLean answered, the static coming back for a moment as the man went silent. He clicked back after a full minute and spoke in a very low voice. “There are chickens hiding under my rig.” Elliot snickered. “You allergic?” “I can hear them bocking,” the man responded in a low, tight voice that said he was probably trying hard not to laugh. “Jesus. You’re having all kinds of fun over there. Here I got a left side view of… two teens necking, and a right side view of… ugh.” Elliot
drew back from the passenger side and settled back in the driver’s seat. “Never mind the right side view.” There was a long silence, and Elliot figured he’d lost the man. He went digging in the sleeper for some chips. As he sat down, McLean finally clicked back on. “I can say, with all seriousness, that the man in front of me is choking the chicken.” He waited a second, then gave Elliot a startlingly good imitation of a chicken b’gok. Elliot spit out his mouthful of chips as he gave a sharp bark of laughter. “Crap, you about made me choke on my Lay’s.” He groped for his bottle of Gatorade on the floor. “What a waste,” McLean responded with a mournful sigh. “Christ on a crutch. What a mess.” Elliot got up and took a couple steps into the back to pull a hand towel out of a cabinet. “And it’s my last bag!” he said, offended. McLean was silent for a long while as Elliot cleaned up his spit chips. Finally, he came back and said, “Want some chicken wings?” Elliot huffed and thumped back down into his chair. “Very funny,” he muttered. He looked out at the traffic. “No love, man. There are people out on the side of the road setting up tents.” “Figures,” McLean grumbled in response. “I’m at the head of the line over here. The ambulance just got through.” “Bird’s eye view. Must be serious,” Elliot said. “Too much of that crap on the roads. Four-wheelers think they’re immortal.” “I can’t even tell you what make this one is, man,” McLean responded, suddenly serious for the first time. “They’ve got one turned over, one in the eastbound, and two more in the west. It’s a mess.” Elliot let out a long, tired breath. “I’m too tired to sit here for hours and have to pay attention,” he muttered. “I’m supposed to be in Wichita in three hours. Not making that one.” “Nope,” McLean agreed sympathetically. Why’d you have to mention chips, huh?”
“Man, I’m hungry.
“Sorry,” Elliot said. “Try the broiled chicken. Ought not take long in mid-July. It’s got to be over 100 outside.”
There was an audible sigh over the CB and the music in the background faded away. “Tell me something good, Millis,” the man requested with a slightly wry twist to his voice. “Uh. Heat’s supposed to break tonight?” “Pfffft,” McLean offered loudly. “Hmm. There’s a great place to overnight when you get around to 70. Conoco. Good restaurant. They bring you pitchers instead of cups,” Elliot said. That service made him particularly happy after a full trailer offload, when he was usually at his crankiest. “Think I’ve been there once or twice. I tend not to overnight much,” the man responded. “You dedicated?” Elliot asked curiously. He’d been driving over the road for three years now, happy to stay on the move. “Nah,” McLean responded. smile evident in his voice.
“Insomniac,” he answered with a
Elliot whistled. “Bet your boss loves you and hates the federal government for holding you to ten hours a day.” “Pretty much. Usually I’m driving at night, though. Take advantage of the light traffic. This is what I get for venturing out in daylight hours,” McLean grumbled. “Must be nice. That’s the thing I like about Millis, it’s all daytime work,” Elliot said. “I park every night and twiddle.” McLean laughed; a boyish, gleeful sound that didn’t seem to fit his gruff voice. “Twiddle,” he snickered quietly. Elliot sniffed and shifted in his seat, crossing his legs the other way. “I don’t like TV. So Sirius, me, and my chips hang out for the ballgames.” “Sounds fun,” McLean muttered. “I’ve got no Sirius. Got no chips. Got no ballgames,” he grumbled disconsolately. “Got books.” “What books?” Elliot asked as he leaned his head back against the window. “I’m about halfway through this series, Douglas Preston and Lincoln Child? They’re pretty good,” McLean responded thoughtfully.
“Clive Cussler. Vince Flynn. Got some others back there I haven’t looked at yet.” “I’ve read some Cussler a ways back,” Elliot admitted. “Tom Clancy. W.E.B. Griffin.” “Griffin’s good,” McLean agreed. “Where are you from, Millis?” “Wilton, Wisconsin,” Elliot said automatically, knowing full well McLean wouldn’t know it. His accent was non-existent. “Haven’t seen it for four years, though.” “Wisconsin,” McLean replied incredulously, complete with a fake accent. “Never would have guessed it. Where are you based now?” “Not. Millis has got about twelve yards scattered. Mostly I work by dispatch, only go in when I need maintenance,” Elliot explained. “Live in your rig, huh?” McLean asked just before an audible thunk sounded. The man on the CB squawked and there was a rustle of movement and banging and shouting. Elliot blinked at the handset as if it would show him what was going on. “McLean?” he asked, somewhat concerned when the yelling started. Another minute of shouting and sounds of what appeared to be a struggle, and then the noises died away. A moment later Elliot could hear a huff and the beginnings of laughter. “I just got attacked by a freaking chicken!” McLean shouted in disbelief. “Roll up your windows, man! Save yourself!” Elliot stared blankly at the mic before he started sniggering. “That’s a new one,” McLean mumbled, sounding slightly flustered. “Suicidal chicken.” Unable to hold back the whole-hearted, booming laugh, Elliot covered his mouth in an attempt to muffle it. “Well… deer, cows, raccoons, armadillo, assorted rodents, why not a chicken?” he asked logically. McLean began to chuckle softly. “I enjoy your laugh, Millis,” he said candidly.
Elliot raised both brows. It wasn’t something he did often, laugh like that. “Sure, McLean. Whatever makes you happy,” he said placatingly, sure the other man was pulling his leg. “Right now I’m just happy not being chicken feed,” the man responded in a slightly huffy voice. “Hey, they’re moving the ambulance,” he added. Perking up, Elliot sat up to try to see ahead. “Eh, can’t see even on this flatland. I must be back a few miles or more.” “False alarm,” McLean sighed. “The ambulance is gone but the tow trucks ain’t here yet. What a damn mess,” he muttered. Elliot fell back into his seat with a huff and looked at the ceiling. “Lovely,” he muttered. “At least you’ll get going first of the two of us.” “Yeah, I’ll be the one with the feathers in my grill,” McLean mumbled. Elliot chuckled, his smile slight. “You sound damaged for life, man.” “I may very well be,” McLean insisted in an innocent tone. “What the hell, man?” “When I see those feathers I’ll honk for ya, how about that?” McLean laughed softly. “I like it,” he responded approvingly. “Hey hey, I think they’re clearing up my side over here.” Elliot made a loud raspberry sound. “I’ll give you a holler as I go by,” McLean snickered. The sound of air brakes in the background accompanied his words. “I hate you,” Elliot said conversationally. “Better than not having an opinion at all,” McLean assured him. Elliot huffed. “Fine. Just go on and leave me,” he said plaintively. “Hey, you want a cell number?” McLean offered uncertainly. “For the overnights?” Elliot leaned forward on his steering wheel, looking out the front window like he could make McLean appear. “I’d like that,” he said genuinely.
“I got it here,” the man mumbled. After a moment he began reciting the number for Elliot. When he was done he gave a blast of his horn, apparently signifying to the line of cars behind him that something good had finally happened and they were moving. Scribbling on the pad he kept clipped to the dash, Elliot heard the air horn and shook his head. “Dang four-wheelers.” He paused a moment, then decided what the hell. “You want my number?” “If you got one to give and don’t mind me calling in the dark,” McLean said with a wide grin apparent in his voice. Elliot reeled off his number. “Hey, I think I see you coming. How long you been driving now?” “You mean today or years-wise?” McLean asked wryly. “If I don’t pull over in the next ten minutes I’ll be illegal,” he answered with a huff. “On my seventh year.” “Since you just started up from the accident, firecracker,” Elliot said drolly, though he tucked that other information away. “Firecracker,” McLean echoed with a laugh. “A mile. Maybe. What color’s your rig? You the red and blue one?” “Yeah, dark red, light blue, Century-class,” Elliot confirmed. “I’m in the granny lane.” McLean chuckled. “I see you. You’re not too far from the funnel, if it makes you feel better.” McLean gave another blast of his horn, one that Elliot could hear over the CB and through the windows this time. A large, shiny black rig with a red diamond on the door was coming up the other side of the highway, moving along with the thin traffic. “Yeah, some, I guess. Still won’t make Wichita on time, but at least I’ll be moving in the right direction.” Elliot hit the horn twice as the McLean rig passed by. “Drive safe, man.” “You too, Millis,” McLean responded with a grin. “Shiny. I’m off.” Elliot hit the button to turn off the CB as he took the truck out of drive and got ready to gear up. A little over two hours to Wichita. “Footloose and fancy free,” he murmured as he got the big truck moving. “We got a long way to go, and a short time to get there….” Elliot started whistling.
ELLIOT muttered again after he finished his cooling coffee. It was a dark, flat road that looked to go on and on and on forever under the half moon. “Godforsaken South Dakota, the place to go when you want to be in the back butt of nowhere. The black hole of America. The crevice into which no man should venture.” He huffed and sat back in his seat, yawning widely and blinking. Flippin’ night run. “I hate night runs,” Elliot mentioned offhand to the no one sitting beside him. If there had been someone, they wouldn’t have heard him over the blasting rock music. “That’s why I work days. Because I hate nights, and everything to do with them. Except the whole sleeping thing when I’m parked. I’ll take the sleeping thing.” He’d had the bad luck of parking in Sioux Falls after a late offload. When another company truck broke an axle and put the driver in the hospital, the dispatcher called at 11 p.m. to ask him to deliver the load. Elliot accepted before even asking about the drop date. 6 a.m. the next morning. He spared a few death-threat type thoughts for the pretty-voiced dispatcher he knew as Susie and then got up and dressed and into the Pilot for some food and coffee. Lots of coffee. Elliot let his head loll back for a minute or so before he had to sit up. He’d gotten about an hour of dozing in before Susie had called, that after sixteen, including six of hard labor. So he was simply exhausted. He rubbed his eyes again and squinted at what looked like a herd of deer grazing by the side of the Interstate. “Bambi? Is that you?” Pulling his eyes back toward the road, they skimmed over his notepad, and he caught the squiggled note. “McLean 865-579-1592.” “Huh.” Elliot glanced back at it a few times. It was 3 a.m. McLean had said he was up at night. “Hell. If he’ll talk to me I’ll send him some chicken nuggets Express Mail.” Grabbing his Bluetooth, Elliot turned down the radio, fixed up his phone, punched in the number, and hit connect. Two rings later a low, gruff voice answered, “White House switchboard, how may I direct your call?”
Elliot blinked. “McLean?” he asked cautiously. There was a slightly breathy laugh in response. “Yeah, who’ve I got?” the man asked in a voice that was far too cheerful for the middle of the night. “Millis. From the Kansas City greasy side up?” “Oh! Hey, man! Sorry about that,” McLean chuckled. When he spoke, he always seemed to be grinning. “How’s the road, Millis?” “Man,” Elliot bemoaned. “Dark, long, wide open and absolutely nothing to see.” “I thought you ran days?” McLean asked to the sound of downshifting in the background. “I do. I’m earning my halo tonight,” Elliot said mournfully. “Driver went down in Sioux Falls and I picked up the load – before I knew it had a 6 a.m. drop.” “Ouch,” McLean laughed good-naturedly. “So I guess you need keeping awake, huh?” he asked. “Please?” Elliot asked pathetically. McLean laughed again. “I got your back, man. Tell me about South Dakota. You been attacked by a buffalo yet?” “Buffalo? You’re joking,” Elliot said flatly. “Buffalo? This is the first time I’ve run I-90. I’m usually up into Sioux Falls and right back down to Omaha.” He paused. “Buffalo?” “Buffalo,” McLean responded with a snicker. “Every state’s got its own attack animal of some description. North and South Dakota share, because they suck.” “I totally understand why, too,” Elliot said. “There’s nothing out here! I’m glad I topped off before leaving Sioux Falls. Three hundredfifty miles of nothing.” He looked out the windshield, squinting. “I think I just saw a tree.” “Bet it was a buffalo,” McLean muttered to him. “No, it was tall and thin. I thought buffalo were squat and fat,” Elliot said, reaching down into the cooler for a cold Mountain Dew. “Could have been a tumbleweed. Do they have tumbleweed up here?”
“They have buffalo,” McLean answered with barely restrained laughter. “You shouldn’t generalize. There could be skinny buffalo.” “Christ,” Elliot said under his breath. “If I hit one of the dang things, I’m mounting the head on my grill.” “Think I’d like to see that,” McLean said thoughtfully. “Tell me, Millis, what got you on the road?” “A sincere desire to get out of Wilton, Wisconsin,” Elliot said with total seriousness. “Yeah, I guess that’d do it.” McLean laughed before he sighed slightly. “You caught me on a slow night, friend,” he said regretfully. “I got nothing for you.” “S’okay,” Elliot said quietly. “Kinda hard to entertain a stranger, I guess. I appreciate the effort.” “Well. Tell me about yourself,” McLean suggested. “Make you a non-stranger. Maybe I’ll be more entertaining.” Elliot laughed aloud. “Well, stop me if it gets too exciting.” McLean chuckled. “I’d forgot how nice your laugh is,” he said with a click in the background. Tipping his head to one side, Elliot looked thoughtful. “I got it from my granddaddy, I guess. He was always after me growing up. Said I was too serious. He believed in laughing hearty and enjoying what you can in life….”
ELLIOT sat straight up out of a solid sleep in reaction to his cell phone ringing, breaking into the quiet of the cab in the wee morning hours. He looked around in confusion before reaching over to the cabinet and groping for the Bluetooth, since his phone was charging up front. He stuck it in his ear and pushed on the button. “Yeah?” he murmured. No one responded, but the sound of soft music filtered through to him, and the very obvious sound of someone singing along with it. Elliot frowned, yawned again, and rubbed at his eyes with one loosely curled fist. “Hello?” He cocked his head, trying to make out the song.
There was no answer, just the singing and the soft drone of an engine in the background. It was swiftly becoming apparent that whoever had called him had not intended to do so. Huffing a little, Elliot laid back down, wondering who it was. He supposed he could get up and check the number. But the more he focused, the more words he could hear, echoed by a pretty decent singing voice. A man’s voice. The song was easier to make out as the truck noise in the background downshifted, as was the singer. Whoever it was, they really enjoyed singing. Elliot sang along with the satellite radio too, but his voice was more likely to break glass than be remotely recognizable. That’s why there was volume control. He shifted to lay his cheek against the pillow and listen, figuring he’d try to get their attention when the song was over. It was too much trouble to get out of the warm bed to get the phone. The song geared into a wordless stanza, and the singer began to whistle along with the tune. He was either trying to stay awake, or he just really enjoyed life at 4 a.m. Elliot actually started humming along softly, waiting for the words to start up again so he could listen. It was a funny little song that tickled his fancy. Not something he’d normally listen to, but entertaining and catchy. And sweet, if he was to admit it. Not something many men would be caught dead singing along to unless they were trying to impress a girl. The caller’s voice rejoined the song as the words began again, his version a decent rendition of the original. As the song wound to a close, Elliot wished he could listen to it again. Maybe the singer would tell him the artist so he could look it up. Now that the music was dying, he tried again. “Hello?” Elliot’s voice was still hoarse from sleep. There was silence as the sound of the road filtered through the phone, and the next song began to drift in. The music was immediately turned down, and the caller’s voice said a tentative, “Hello?” “Hello?” Elliot echoed, voice muffled in his pillow. Another moment of silence followed, then some shuffling sounds. Then the cursing began. Elliot cleared his throat. “Ah. Hello? You called?”
“Who is this?” the man asked in a deflated voice. “Did I wake you? Did I sing to you?” Elliot rolled over to his back. That voice sounded familiar. “Millis Freight 531, yes and yes.” McLean began to laugh on the other end of the line. “Millis! Christ, man, I’m sorry,” he laughed. “Ahhh, I thought it sounded like you. I mean just now. Not when you were singing,” Elliot said, his words breaking up at the end in a yawn. “Not bad. You can sing to me anytime.” McLean snickered softly. “Jesus. I’m really sorry,” he offered again. “I must have hit the button when I was screwing with the seatbelt,” he muttered. “This is embarrassing.” “You know I’ll be bringing this up at family reunions and major holidays,” Elliot said. “Especially since you woke me up. But at least it was nice to listen to.” McLean cleared his throat and mumbled something under his breath. “I like that song,” he finally offered weakly. “Eh. It’s kinda cute. What is it? Who is it?” Elliot asked, pulling his pillow up against his chest. McLean waited a moment and then cleared his throat again. “Amos Lee. It’s called ‘Sweet Pea’,” he finally muttered with obvious embarrassment. Elliot couldn’t help it. He grinned at the top of the truck, like a fool. He cleared his throat. “‘Sweet Pea’,” he said flatly, fighting down the amusement. “Shut up, Millis,” McLean laughed. “I didn’t mean to have an audience!” The laugh just broke out and echoed around Elliot. “An audience of one? I’m not much of an audience considering I don’t have any taste in music. But you can sing just fine.” “Thanks,” McLean muttered grudgingly. “I….” He laughed again in embarrassment. “I’ve never accidentally dialed anybody before. Usually I’m real careful at night,” he said apologetically.
“Just don’t make a habit of it,” Elliot muttered. Then he sighed. “I’ve done it myself a few times, hitting my phone on something when it’s on my belt. I forget the dang key lock.” “Yeah,” McLean responded uncomfortably. “Look, I’ll let you get back to sleep. I’m really sorry,” he offered. Elliot grunted, pushing his face into his pillow. “Make it up to me, then,” he said grouchily. There was a slightly stunned silence, and then McLean asked a surprised, “How?” “Mmm. Sing t’me,” Elliot murmured, already half asleep again. “Sing to you?” McLean asked carefully. “I….” “Go’on,” Elliot said crankily. “You woke me up.” McLean was silent as the engine growled in the background. “You want me to sing to you?” he finally asked flatly. Elliot sighed heavily. growled.
“Then play the dang song again,” he
“Okay,” McLean responded sheepishly. There was a shuffling sound in the background and then the music began to play. He turned it up louder so Elliot could hear it clearly. Humming slightly, Elliot rubbed his face against the pillow. “You like this song?” he murmured again. “Yeah,” McLean answered. “Sing it to my nieces to get them to go to bed,” he admitted. “You didn’t tell me you had nieces,” Elliot mumbled. “You didn’t tell me you had a brother or sister.” “You never asked,” McLean said defensively. Elliot grunted. “You got any family?” He could hear the song in the background. “Two brothers,” McLean answered. He still sounded uncomfortable, as if he thought Elliot was annoyed and didn’t know how to fix it. “One’s got two little girls,” he mumbled. “I’m the favorite uncle ’cause I bring them gifts when I see them twice every year.”
“Favorite uncle,” Elliot repeated, and then he chuckled. “I can see that.” “Shut up,” McLean muttered. “What? If I like your singing, surely your nieces do.” Elliot’s voice was drowsy, and he yawned. McLean hummed slightly. dubiously.
“You being serious?” he asked
“I’m always serious,” Elliot said flatly. “Well… thanks,” McLean said to him softly. That was the last Elliot heard as he dropped off to sleep, besides strains of ‘Sweet Pea’ trailing off into the night.
STARING up at the ceiling made for a flipping long night. Elliot groaned and covered his face. He’d hit the end of his hours for the week and was stuck out in the middle of Iowa with nowhere to go and nothing to do. There wasn’t even baseball. He grabbed his cellphone and checked the time, then hit a speed dial button. Maybe McLean would be interested in entertaining him. He seemed to have enjoyed it the last couple months, anyway. “City Morgue,” McLean’s cheerful voice answered. “You kill ’em, we chill ’em!” “I’m chilling enough. Entertain me,” Elliot ordered waspishly. His demand was greeted with momentary silence. “Want me to sing and dance?” McLean finally asked innocently. Elliot grunted. “Whatever,” he said. Then he perked up a little. “Although you do sing well.” “I ain’t singing to you, Millis, no matter how much I like you,” McLean rumbled. “Awww. Even if I beg real pretty?” Elliot teased. “Shut up,” McLean huffed. Oklahoma?”
“Want me to tell you a story,
“Ooo. You can sing that one, too!” “Don’t push your luck, son, I’m still in bed.” “In bed?” Elliot pulled the phone away from his ear and checked the time. “It’s 8 o’clock – what time zone are you in? Greenwich Mean?” “Mine,” McLean answered with an ill-concealed yawn. about two hours before I start it up tonight. Took the day off.” Elliot grimaced. “Sorry, man. known. It’s not like you sleep a lot.”
“Got
I wouldn’t have called if I’d
“Don’t worry about it,” McLean told him. “I said I was in bed, not asleep. Where are you?” “We’re in Eye-oh-way,” Elliot muttered. “Amber waves of grain. And grain. And grain. And yet – more grain.” McLean was silent for a moment, then he asked with an obvious grin, “What are you wearing?” Elliot frowned. “Jeans. Why?” McLean huffed. “It was a joke, man,” he sighed. “You gotta lighten up.” “A joke?” Elliot said, brow furrowed. Then he blinked. “Oh. Very funny. Funny guy.” He leaned back into his bed and crossed his legs. He was wearing jeans. And nothing else. He raised one foot and wiggled his toes. “What are you wearing?” “Not a damn thing,” McLean drawled with a snicker. Elliot laughed heartily and grinned up at the roof. “Mighty comfy then, I guess.” McLean chuckled. “Yeah, well. crawled up your nose and died?”
Home sweet home.
What
“I’m bored,” Elliot said mournfully. “There’s nowhere to go, nothing to see, and no baseball, dangit!” He sniffed, pouting. “You know what you need?” McLean asked cheerfully. “A book.” “A book.” Elliot’s voice was full of suspicion and bordered on distaste.
“We’ve had this discussion before,” McLean muttered. “Maybe you need a date?” he asked carefully. Elliot stared up at the ceiling, considering it. He could probably find somebody in the stop, it was a large one, considering it was out in the middle of nowhere, so lots of trucks stopped there. “Maybe,” he finally muttered. “Takes too much energy.” “Jesus,” McLean drew out. “You have to get more rest, friend.” Elliot made a face at the ceiling. “What do you suggest? A trip to Disney World? I’ve got no one to go with. I might as well park somewhere and play with myself.” “That can be fun,” McLean responded encouragingly. “I’ve had more than enough practice, thanks,” Elliot mumbled. Not more than a couple hours ago, actually. McLean cleared his throat. “Broke my finger on the steering wheel once,” he deadpanned, repeating words from their first encounter. Elliot smiled. Then he chuckled. Then he snickered. “I don’t guess I’ve been that… energetic.” He snickered again. “I like to lay down, if I can. Although a shower’s nice.” “Thanks for the visual there, man,” McLean said flatly. “Shower with fifty other cranky truckers? Oh, yeah, count me in.” “Dickhead. Private shower,” Elliot retorted. “You wanna go for the group thing, be my guest. I’m not that adventuresome.” “Maybe that’s why you’re grumpy,” McLean laughed. “Har dee har har,” Elliot muttered. “I should have known you’d go for that kind of thing, Mr. Happy-Go-Lucky. Spread the love.” “My real name is Moonbeam,” McLean drawled in a dazed, stoned voice. Elliot snorted and started to stretch. “Nice to meet you, Moonbeam. Care to share whatever it is you’re hopped up on?” McLean sighed and snorted, then he grunted and seemed to be sitting up in his bed. “Are you unhappy, Millis?” he asked softly. Relaxing, Elliot rubbed one hand over his belly. “Not most of the time,” he said, figuring that was accurate. “I don’t think I am. Just lonely,
you know? Not much chance to get to know someone out here on the road.” “You strike me as being unhappy,” McLean admitted to him. “You make me want to give you a hug or something.” Elliot frowned. “I come across as unhappy?” He stared up at the ceiling. “Why?” he asked evenly, really curious. “I’m not even sure,” McLean answered thoughtfully. “Maybe… maybe it’s just ’cause you only call me when you need a distraction from something that’s annoying you,” he tried. “Maybe that’s why you come across that way. To me, I mean.” “I….” Elliot swallowed hard. “I’m sorry. Guess I’m not much of a friend, if that’s all I do,” he said quietly. He closed his eyes. McLean deserved better than that, and Elliot hadn’t even realized he was shortchanging the man. “I didn’t say I minded,” McLean told him easily. “I just worry about you.” “Yeah?” Elliot asked as he started to smile a little. “I don’t figure anyone’s worried about me since my Mama died. Big, tough trucker, you know.” “I’m a big tough trucker,” McLean huffed. “I still need cuddles,” he continued, barely able to speak without laughing. Elliot chuckled. “Cuddles, huh? Can’t be too much of that to be found on the road.” “Nope,” McLean responded with a sigh. murmuring an apology along with it.
He yawned again,
“S’okay,” Elliot answered quietly. “You can call me if you need help staying awake later. Lord knows I’ll be here,” he said, not as annoyed as he was earlier, just resigned. McLean sighed heavily. “Do me a favor, okay? Go get yourself a date. Take some stress out of life.” “What? And cheat on you? Such a high opinion you have of me,” Elliot joked. At the same time, he started to consider McLean’s suggestion more seriously. Some company might not be such a bad idea. “Call it an open relationship,” McLean offered wryly.
“I’ll think about it,” Elliot finally promised. “Feel better now?” “Take notes,” McLean ordered. “Jesus Christ. You won’t even trust me?” Elliot could imagine McLean’s reaction to the type of notes he’d be taking. Insert Tab A into Slot B, male model preferably, though not required. He rolled his eyes. “Not as far as I can throw you,” McLean drawled. “And I need the stimulation.” “Uh. What’s the matter? Steering wheel not doing it for you anymore?” Elliot prodded, trying to turn attention away from himself. “I never said I was jerking it when I broke my finger,” McLean laughed. “Pervert.” Elliot chuckled. entertained.”
“Sometimes,” he agreed.
“Keeps me
“Well, anything to keep you entertained,” McLean chuckled. He hummed thoughtfully. “I might need to take my own advice,” he mused. “Go get yourself a date?” Elliot asked. “Can anyone handle such perpetual happiness up close and personal?” he teased. “Only in embarrassment.
small
doses,”
McLean
grumbled
in
apparent
Elliot snickered. “Tell you what. I’ll go find somebody to keep me company for a short time if you will, too.” McLean hummed again. “Deal,” he said suddenly. “Although, now I feel slightly dirty about it.” “Good Lord,” Elliot said, obviously put upon. “Your sense of humor is something else, McLean.” “What’d I say?” McLean asked innocently. “Slightly dirty, my rear end. You’re the kind that’d roll around in the mud just because,” he accused. “What’s wrong with that?” McLean asked curiously. “There’s nothing quite so fun as getting dirty enough that you don’t care how dirty you get.”
“I get dirty enough every day. My idea of fun is staying clean for a couple of hours,” Elliot said. “No wonder you’re so cranky,” McLean observed dryly. Elliot raspberried into the phone. “But I do cranky so well,” he muttered. “That you do,” McLean agreed fondly. “Well. Should I say happy hunting?” “Sure, I guess,” Elliot said, looking up at the cabinets again as he shifted a leg back and forth. “You, too.” “Be safe, Millis,” McLean sighed. “On the road and off,” he crooned. “And again I say,” Elliot said, “Dickhead. You be safe, too.” Hitting the button to close the connection, Elliot wondered how in the world he’d gotten himself talked into finding some companionship. He hoped McLean wasn’t serious about the notes.
ELLIOT walked out of the showers in fresh clothes with his duffel over one shoulder and scrubbing his hand through his wet curls. He felt a lot better now in clean jeans, a well-worn white T-shirt that fit close and soft, and his cross-trainers instead of the boots he wore when working on the trailer. More than ready for dinner and lots and lots of iced tea, he headed for the Iron Skillet. Being early evening, the restaurant was busy, which meant the best food. He sat at the table he was pointed to – the last open one, it looked like – and asked immediately for the beverage. The waitress gave him a knowing smile and promised to be right back. Sighing happily, Elliot scooted back a little and stretched out his long legs under the table. Iron Skillets were usually pretty nice and left room for bigger men to eat without being cramped. He scanned the menu, wishing he weren’t starving. Everything looked good. But he settled quickly on breakfast when the waitress returned with a large carafe of tea for him, and he blessed her and her children with longevity and happiness before ordering. He drank down half a glass to start with before refilling it and relaxing some. Now that he was settled, he could let his mind wander…
and it wandered right back to McLean, where it had been spending a lot of time lately. He’d talked a lot with the other driver the past few weeks, and he really enjoyed their rapport. It was easy to talk and laugh about anything and everything, even for him, someone who didn’t laugh much in the big scheme of things. McLean, on the other hand, seemed to find the joy in just about everything. Elliot had never met someone like him. He also had a wicked sense of humor, and he wasn’t afraid to use it. Elliot’s lips quirked into a smile as he remembered McLean being stuck on the Briley in Nashville a few days ago, giving him a play-by-play of two men and a woman out of their cars arguing in front of his truck. McLean had finally figured out one of the guys was her husband – and the other most decidedly wasn’t. The resulting fist fight had been pretty pathetic. It was just one in a long string of entertaining tales from McLean. Even the most mundane of events could be made into an adventure when he told it. Elliot had wondered more than once how the man kept such a happy attitude when he didn’t sleep. Seemed like ever. Elliot was a bear by nature, and if he didn’t get at least six uninterrupted hours, he turned into a surly grizzly. But he could wake McLean from a dead sleep and hear the man smiling as he answered the phone. The waitress arrived with his overloaded plate, and Elliot blinked in surprise. He’d been musing for more than ten minutes. Huh. He had just picked up his fork to start in on his meal when a shadow covered his table. “Hi,” a man said in greeting, smiling in a friendly manner as he waved a battered cowboy hat at the table. “You mind if I join you?” he asked. “Last seat in the house.” Elliot glanced up and shrugged. “Sure thing. Take a load off.” He gestured at the opposite side of the table. The man offered his hand before sliding into the booth opposite Elliot. “Jimmy Vaughn,” he introduced himself. “Thanks. I’m damn near starving, I hated the thought of eating a Snickers while I waited for dinner.” Setting down his fork, Elliot shook his hand. “I know what you mean,” he said wryly. “I lucked out, and thank God. Elliot Cochran.” While Jimmy settled himself, Elliot flagged down the waitress who had delivered the carafe. Jimmy ordered quickly. He spoke with a twang that
had some southern to it, and he was a little rough around the edges; flannel shirt, longish hair that he seemed to actually have pulled back into two tiny pigtails behind his ears, battered cowboy boots, and hat to match. But he was grinning and friendly even as he ordered. Elliot shook his head and went back to his breakfast. Grinning at the end of a long working day. Christ. He must drive exclusively. Elliot looked down at his three eggs, sunny side up, a slab of country ham, four biscuits and plenty of milk gravy, and bowl of apple sauce. He started working through it steadily. “Good to meet you, Elliot,” Jimmy finally said as soon as the waitress had gone. He sat his pitiful hat on the seat beside him and looked around the restaurant quietly. He sat silent for a long moment, letting Elliot eat in peace. About halfway through Elliot started to slow down. He rubbed his face and yawned against the back of his hand before tossing down his fork in disgust. “I’m too tired to eat,” he muttered, ostensibly to himself. “Cross country?” Jimmy asked him with a slight smile. “Full trailer offload after nine hours driving,” Elliot corrected. His voice was low and tired. He half-heartedly picked up his fork and prodded at the ham before taking another bite. Jimmy smiled and looked out the window at the parking lot full of idling trucks. “You sound like a buddy of mine,” he mused. “Always complaining about his food.” Elliot snorted. “That reminds me. I gotta shop before I crash. A lot of times I don’t get breakfast.” He paused. “Or lunch.” Jimmy tutted at him and shook his head. “Well, that ain’t healthy. No wonder you’re tired.” A shoulder edged up. “Helps me keep my girlish figure. Well, that and offloading trailers in broilers.” Funny from him, all wiry muscle, but there certainly wasn’t any extra padding. “I ate a whole package of Oreos for dinner one night and had still lost two pounds by the next morning.” Elliot huffed and pushed the plate away. Jimmy looked down at the plate, then up at Elliot with a slight smirk. “Eat that,” the complete stranger ordered.
Elliot turned up his nose and grimaced, but pulled the plate back toward him, cut into another gravy-smothered biscuit, and resumed eating. He knew he had to eat. He just didn’t care about it most of the time, until he had a dizzy spell in the truck or trailer. That’s why he kept all the snacks around. Getting dizzy while driving a big rig equaled Bad. Across from him, Jimmy Vaughn laughed softly and shifted in the booth. He was a big man as well, almost as tall as Elliot, and when he moved, his knee hit Elliot’s under the table. “Sorry,” Elliot said through a partial mouthful, and he shifted his extended leg toward his other one. He glanced over at the other man as he stabbed another chunk of ham. “I tend to sprawl.” “Yeah, me too,” Jimmy responded with a smirk. “Bit hard not to. Hell, after ten hours in a rig with nothing to do but talk to myself, I’ll take accidental kneeings as human contact,” he snickered. Elliot paused mid-bite, cheeks flushing. “I do that. myself.” He turned his nose up into a snort of self-derision.
Talk to
“Don’t we all,” Jimmy chuckled. “Yeah,” Elliot admitted, taking another bite before pushing the mostly emptied plate away. “No more.” He reached for his iced tea and yawned again. The waitress brought Jimmy’s plate with a smile and he thanked her profusely, going so far as to offer to have her children as she walked away laughing. Elliot snagged his ticket from under the iced tea carafe. “I’m out before I turn into a pumpkin. Nice to meet you, Jimmy Vaughn,” Elliot said distractedly as he stood up. Jimmy looked up at him with a slightly disappointed smile. It morphed quickly into his former grin and he nodded his head. “Thanks for the company, Elliot Cochran,” he responded. “I’d stay a little longer, but I’m no company when I’m snoring. Drive safe.” Elliot left the table and made for the register. He reminded himself to hit the store for supplies before he crashed in the sleeper.
ELLIOT jerked awake. The echoes of an unusually loud noise still reverberated in the cab. Courtesy of always being in noisy truck parks like
this, Elliot could sleep through nearly anything. But now, jarred out of a sound sleep, he was wide awake. Sighing, he reached up to thumb on a soft light, providing a bare amount to see by. He shifted on the wide twin bunk, sticking his feet out from under the covers and staring at the cabinet across from him, drumming his fingers on his bare chest. “Dangit,” Elliot muttered. “This having friends thing sucks, because being lonely sucks even more.” He rolled over and reached for his cell phone. Punching a speed dial, he laid back, one arm folded under his head. After five or six rings, McLean’s gruff voicemail message greeted him. “You’ve reached the dead zone for phone calls. Don’t leave a message, ’cause I’ll break the phone trying to figure out how to get to it.” Elliot snorted and ended the call, knowing it would show his number as a missed call. He tossed the phone back onto the rubberized counter top and huffed at himself. “Maybe there’s a game… crap. It’s 1 a.m. Even the West coast games are over. Four flipping hours. Thank God I’m not moving tomorrow.” He continued to mutter to himself before he growled and lurched up off the bed and grabbed his clothes. A few minutes later he clomped down out of the cab and slammed the door shut with more ferocity than usual. Annoyed, he started walking toward the main building. It was a good walk – he always parked as far out as he could get, for the peace and the quiet. “McLean’s rubbing off on you, Cochran,” he told himself. “You’re gonna turn into a vampire and be up all night.” He thought about that for a little bit as his cross-trainers crunched on the gravel. “Offloads in the sun would be a pain.” He sighed and walked past the scales. There was a wide open grassy area off to the right, not well-lit, but quiet and peaceful. A man walked around in the middle of it, the burning tip of a cigarette the only thing really giving away his presence. Elliot just happened to glance up and see the small light. It was enough to get his attention, and he stopped next to a set of benches on the edge of the grass to try and identify it. The light flared briefly and then a cloud of blue smoke followed, wavering in the moonlight. The shadow of the man smoking seemed to take notice of Elliot and he raised his hand in the dark. “Is that Elliot Cochran I see?” Jimmy called softly.
Since he was standing in the light that spilled from the safety lights of the truck lot, Elliot knew he was more visible than the other man. For a moment, hearing the voice in the dark, Elliot almost thought he was hearing McLean. He shook himself. It was probably just the similar accent. One gruff Southerner tended to sound like another. He had to stop thinking so much about the McLean, it was making him crazy. “Yeah,” he said as he walked a few steps into the grass where his eyes could adjust. “Ah. The illustrious Jimmy Vaughn who eats with strangers.” “That’s what they called me in high school,” Jimmy replied happily. Elliot raised a doubtful eyebrow. “Eats With Strangers? Did you hang out with Bops With Cheerleaders and Crashes The Boards?” Jimmy chuckled and inhaled deeply of his cigarette. “Offer you a Marlboro?” he asked after blowing a smoke ring into the air. “Sure. Can’t make me any more awake than I am now,” Elliot said. He smoked occasionally, usually when he had a few days off and nothing to do but stare at four non-moving walls. “For a man who was too tired to eat, you’re awfully awake now,” Jimmy observed as he knocked a cigarette out of the box he took from his pocket. He stepped closer and handed it to Elliot, then extracted a Bic lighter from the breast pocket of his faded western-style flannel shirt and offered to light it for him. Elliot stuck the cigarette between his lips and leaned forward, sheltering the flame and Jimmy’s hand with one of his own as the tobacco ignited and Elliot inhaled. He straightened and pulled the cigarette from his lips and sighed before placidly blowing smoke up and away from the other man. “Thanks,” he murmured. “My pleasure,” Jimmy murmured with a smile. Elliot hummed slightly as he took another pull and started pacing a little. “This being awake at night thing really sucks,” he offered conversationally. “It’s not so bad,” Jimmy responded thoughtfully as he watched Elliot. “The world at night is far more interesting, I’ve found. If you like that sort of thing.”
“Guess I hadn’t really thought about it,” Elliot said through the cigarette. “I’m always up before dawn, so I don’t make it too late.” He glanced over at the other man. “You’re speaking from experience, I take it?” It made him think of McLean again, and Elliot huffed softly. “I tend to drive nights,” Jimmy answered as he lowered his head and began walking slowly. “Hit my limit for the week, though, so I’m stuck here for another twenty hours. I’m all wired.” Once Jimmy moved, Elliot fell in beside him, and they started walking around the grassy area that was roughly the size of a basketball court. “Stuck? This isn’t too bad a place to overnight. I’ve been in a hell of a lot worse.” “Yeah,” Jimmy agreed. “Hate to sound like a tightass, but it’s hard to find a lot that isn’t crawling with lizards, know what I mean?” he asked, referring to the truck stop prostitutes that were always around the shadier places. “Yeah, I do,” Elliot said immediately. “Not my scene. So I tend to stick to name brand stops if I can. Less trolling. Even then, it’s still potluck, though. I just stay in my cab.” “I have to get out,” Jimmy responded with a wave of his cigarette. “I like to see the stars, when I can. If I’m lucky, I run into someone else who’s restless and find myself with a companion,” he added with a grin. Elliot pulled the cigarette from between his lips to flick away the ash. “I’m never up this late. You’ve lucked out.” “Won’t hear me complaining,” Jimmy replied with a slight smirk. Elliot’s eyes shifted and he looked sideways at Jimmy before shaking his head slightly and taking another drag off the cigarette. “Look at the stars, huh? Not gonna see too many here, so close to O.K. City.” “Yeah. But I still know they’re up there,” Jimmy argued as he looked up at the sky. “So, what brings you out?” “Stupid noisy cabover ’bout blew a cylinder, sounded like,” Elliot muttered. “Woke me up.” “Ah,” Jimmy grinned as he took another long drag. “Damn, and I was hoping it was my company you were missing,” he said sorrowfully.
Elliot snorted and looked up at the other man, eyebrow raised. Hmm. “Maybe I was,” he said. His voice suggested an unusual burst of humor… or something more, depending on how Jimmy interpreted it. It wasn’t often at all Elliot met someone out on the road he clicked with this quickly. And McLean had suggested he get himself some company…. Jimmy stopped walking and turned to look at Elliot, interest obviously piqued by the response. He stood looking at Elliot with a slight smile for a long moment as his smoke burned down. Finally, he put the cigarette to his lips and took a long, last drag, then tossed the butt on the ground and twisted the toe of his boot on it to put it out. Elliot’s eyes stayed on Jimmy’s lips as Jimmy finished with his cigarette. Elliot’s was only about half burnt, so he inhaled again as he watched Jimmy openly. It could be dangerous, what he was doing. Very dangerous. But dang if he wasn’t going to do it anyway. “My rig,” Jimmy said abruptly as he ground out his cigarette. “I bought it about five years ago from a man who drove with his wife,” he told Elliot casually. “They got it custom built, huge cab. They had it fitted out with a queen size bed,” he continued as he looked up at Elliot with a slight smirk. “You should see it.” Elliot nodded slowly as he took another hit off the cigarette. “Sounds like it,” he agreed. “Not something you see too often out on the road like this.” He took his time studying Jimmy’s face before dropping the cigarette and smashing it underfoot. “What time do you head out in the morning?” Jimmy asked without taking his eyes off Elliot. “I don’t have to be in Tulsa ’til Monday 6 a.m.,” Elliot said. “Hadn’t decided on when I’ll leave out.” “You’ve got a whole day, then. Since you’re restless, you could come take a tour now,” Jimmy proposed with a sly grin. “If you’re up for something like that.” Elliot fought against a smirk as he felt his cock take definite interest. Since when was arranging a practically anonymous night of sex so enjoyable instead of awkward? “I certainly am restless,” he agreed. “Lead the way.”
Jimmy laughed softly and nodded his head toward the very back of the lot. “I’ve even got food in there,” he crooned as he began walking toward a large, dark rig. “One does tend to find food in most sleepers,” Elliot pointed out. “Especially those of us who drive full-time and then some.” “I might find something else to tempt you,” Jimmy mused as they made their way out of the grassy area and onto the blacktop. “I’m a sucker for chocolate,” Elliot admitted. “That all?” Jimmy asked with a suggestive undertone as he walked up to the large sleeper and unlocked it. Elliot had been too busy watching Jimmy’s ass to notice much around them, vaguely registering the big dark rig. He stopped several feet away to look at the other man frankly. “No,” he said lowly. “That’s not all.” Jimmy opened the door and stood aside as he turned around and looked at Elliot. He was grinning as he removed his battered cowboy hat and ushered Elliot in. “Do tell,” he drawled. Elliot mounted the steps, slid past the seats and leaned against a cabinet on one side of the sleeper, extending his legs out in front of him and crossing them at the ankles. All in all, he was feeling quite pleased with himself. “Might take some explaining,” he said, gesturing for Jimmy to come closer. Jimmy hung his hat on a hook on the other side of the sleeper, closed the curtains to block out the front windows, and turned to look at Elliot appraisingly. He quirked a smile and moved closer in the small space, tilting his head slightly to draw Elliot’s attention to the impressive size of the rig. It was almost twice the size of a standard cab. Obediently looking around, Elliot was suitably impressed. “Wouldn’t want to think about the price tag to have this built,” he said, eyes flickering from the wide bed to the man standing nearby. Jimmy moved close and shrugged slightly as he slowly invaded Elliot’s personal space. Elliot dragged his eyes up Jimmy’s frame to stop on the full lips that had caught his attention when they held a cigarette between them. He waited for Jimmy to make the move – it was his rig, after all.
Jimmy watched him for a long moment and then grinned widely. He reached out and hooked a finger through one of Elliot’s belt loops and pulled him away from the cabinet. They were practically the same height. That made it easier. Elliot huffed and bumped lightly against Jimmy’s chest; a flash of arousal zipped through him, heating the atmosphere around them. He settled a hand on each of Jimmy’s hips before grasping one and tugging. Jimmy leaned closer and kissed him tentatively, letting their lips just barely brush each other. Elliot seemed so serious, he wondered if he could handle something light and fairly anonymous. Sighing shakily with the gentle touches, Elliot finally turned his chin just enough for their mouths to make solid contact. His hands squeezed Jimmy’s hips in approval. Jimmy took the touch as permission to continue and he leaned into Elliot, kissing him harder and sliding one hand into his hair. He twisted his fingers into Elliot’s wavy hair and moved just slightly, tugging him toward the bed. Elliot didn’t even think of doing anything else but touching Jimmy. So when Jimmy moved, so did he. He met the kiss that was getting hotter and savored being held close – that in itself was enough to get him up – but Jimmy’s attention was doing the trick nicely. Jimmy’s hands slid under Elliot’s T-shirt and began to push it up, letting his fingers drag along Elliot’s muscles with relish. He growled softly and bit lightly at Elliot’s lip. “Oh, yeah,” Elliot breathed. He chased Jimmy’s mouth, nipping in return and tasting the mix of man and cigarette. The low growl thrummed through him, and he arched against Jimmy’s hands. “Hauling boxes is good for the muscle tone, huh?” Jimmy asked breathlessly as he pulled back and tugged the shirt up over Elliot’s head so he could admire the cut abs. Elliot raised his arms to help. “Uh huh,” he agreed, hands going right back to Jimmy’s hips. “You unload fifty thousand pounds of freight five times a week and see what it does for you.” His hands slid up Jimmy’s back. “But I’m thinking I like what I feel, just as it is.” Jimmy tossed the shirt aside and moved his hands down Elliot’s stomach to tug at the button of his jeans. He leaned forward and kissed Elliot again hungrily as he fumbled with the zipper and then pushed
Elliot’s jeans down slowly to hang on his hips. He let his hands slide back to sit at Elliot’s waist and pulled him nearer. Being closer made it more difficult, but as they attacked each other’s mouths, Elliot pushed Jimmy’s shirt off his shoulders and dipped his hands to work open the button fly before sliding a hand under the warm flannel shirt to coast over Jimmy’s belly. Jimmy groaned in appreciation and lifted his arms to urge Elliot to continue. Rucking up the fabric, Elliot bared Jimmy’s chest, and before he even got rid of the shirt, Elliot shifted down to close his lips on the hard nubbin of Jimmy’s nipple. Jimmy arched his back and let his hand rest on the back of Elliot’s head as his own eyes drifted closed. He muttered something that wasn’t understandable and then pulled Elliot’s head up to kiss him again hard. Elliot sank into the kiss. It was hot and wet and passionate, and he moaned against Jimmy’s lips. He slid one hand down the back of Jimmy’s loosened jeans to cup the other man’s ass and finally dragged their bodies directly together. Jimmy growled low in response and pressed his weight into Elliot’s body, toppling them back onto the bed. He held Elliot there and kissed him as he let their bodies grind together. Elliot shifted his legs apart on the bed to settle Jimmy’s body more firmly against him as his hands continued to rove. When Jimmy twisted just right against him, Elliot’s breath caught and his fingers tightened. Jimmy rose and began kissing his way down Elliot’s body, obviously appreciating the hard muscles his lips and tongue encountered along the way. He backed himself off the bed and stood, bending to give one last kiss to Elliot’s stomach before he looked up at him and smirked. “Don’t move,” he ordered in a hoarse voice. Raising an eyebrow, Elliot just blinked at him, mouth open as he took slightly hurried breaths. The sight in front of him was gorgeous. He could hold still – for now. Jimmy took a step and kicked out of his jeans before he could trip over them, which he was apt to do, then went to a drawer in the cabinet and rummaged through it. He tossed a bottle of lubricant at Elliot and then chased it with a foil-wrapped condom. Laying there shirtless with his jeans unfastened, Elliot made sure the stuff didn’t go skidding, but otherwise he kept his eyes intently on Jimmy. Once he was sure Jimmy was watching, he slowly and deliberately licked his lips.
Jimmy chuckled as he watched Elliot with obvious enjoyment. He took the two steps it required to bring himself back to the bed and gripped Elliot’s jeans, yanking them down without thought of the shoes Elliot was wearing. He growled in annoyance, then bent and kissed at Elliot’s hip, letting his teeth drag across the skin as he reached down to work on the shoes. Elliot snorted softly at Jimmy’s antics and watched avidly. The shoes fell to the floor of the sleeper with two hollow thuds, and Jimmy reached up and pulled at Elliot’s boxers as he looked up at him. Studying Jimmy’s face for a moment, Elliot nodded slightly and lifted his hips to help. Jimmy grinned and pulled the boxers down, then curved his back slightly as he bent over Elliot and licked at the tender skin. He kissed and licked his way slowly up Elliot’s body again until he got to his neck, then nuzzled under his ear and bit lightly at his earlobe. As he moved, he was trying to push away any remaining clothing they had left between them. Elliot pulled one knee up to keep Jimmy’s body aligned atop him, and groaned once their warm skin was sliding all over. Jimmy’s lips on the sensitive spots under and behind his ear made him shiver, and he clutched at the other man with another soft sound of entreaty. Jimmy couldn’t stand it any longer, and he moved to kiss Elliot again hungrily as he pushed himself further between Elliot’s legs. He reached for the pillow at the head of the bed and pushed it aside, then slid his hands under Elliot’s arms and began to drag him sideways to the head of the bed. Grunting, Elliot pushed himself up on his elbows and helped Jimmy’s efforts, making sure he rubbed against Jimmy all he could. Jimmy groaned and rocked against him, pressing his face into Elliot’s neck. “God, you feel good,” he finally moaned as he slid a hand under Elliot’s hips to push up at the small of his back. A purr rumbling in his chest, Elliot arched up against Jimmy as he touched and stroked and squeezed, enjoying the weight and heft against him. “Took the words right out of my mouth,” Elliot said hoarsely. He ducked his chin to try to capture Jimmy’s lips again. Jimmy kissed him messily as he reached out blindly for the supplies he had tossed. Unable to hold still, Elliot shifted against Jimmy while gripping his hips and gulped when their cocks mashed against one another.
Jimmy tore away from him with a little huff, licking his lips and panting slightly as he finally got hold of the lubricant and held it up for Elliot’s approval. Elliot glanced at the bottle seriously. “Are you wanting an okay of some kind? Lube is lube. Use it.” “Well, some of it’s flavored,” Jimmy pointed out defensively as he used his thumb to open it. Elliot scrunched his face up. “Yuck. Not my idea of a good time.” “See?” Jimmy cooed as he reached between them. “Yeah, yeah,” Elliot allowed, rolling his eyes. He reached to slide his hand over Jimmy’s head, slowly playing with his soft hair. Jimmy’s fingers slowly worked their way inside him, the actions surprisingly gentle as Jimmy watched him intently. Feeling the intensity of the moment start to come back, Elliot moved carefully against Jimmy’s hand, propping his knee up. He forced himself to breathe evenly and kept his fingers moving through Jimmy’s hair. Jimmy bent to kiss him again, thrusting slowly against him in anticipation as his fingers twisted. Elliot moaned against his lips as the desire curled inside him. “Want...” he murmured. “Fuck,” Jimmy breathed. “You want it, you got it,” he said as he pulled his fingers out carefully and pushed into a kneeling position. He had to hunch since the bed was topped with storage. He tore open the condom wrapper as he met Elliot’s eyes. Swallowing hard, Elliot nodded, and then his lips quirked sardonically. “C’mon,” he invited, “before I get impatient and decide to screw you instead.” Jimmy’s cock jumped in his hand as he rolled the condom on, and he bit his lip and grinned down at Elliot. “Like I’d mind that,” he groaned as he crawled back up Elliot’s body. He slid his arm under Elliot’s knee and pulled his leg up, putting him in a slightly more vulnerable position as he guided himself to push against Elliot demandingly.
“I’ll remember,” Elliot gasped out as he made himself relax enough to feel Jimmy slowly sink inside of him. “Oh… God,” Elliot whispered, a smile finally pulling at his lips. Jimmy groaned and shuddered as he rocked himself deeper. He curled over Elliot, tangling his hand in Elliot’s hair as he thrust into him experimentally. “Okay?” he gasped hopefully. “God, yes!” Elliot said immediately. He slid his hands to pull on Jimmy’s hips. “Time to roll.” “Roll?” Jimmy asked plaintively. “Don’t make me take matters into my own hands,” Elliot threatened, shifting his hips against Jimmy in a sudden rush. Jimmy called out wordlessly and arched his back. “Ah, I think he likes that,” Elliot purred, moving again in the same motion. Jimmy shuddered helplessly and gasped, thrusting into Elliot as his hand tightened in his hair. “Yeah,” he managed to groan. Pleased with his discovery, Elliot took full advantage of it. He let Jimmy go for a few thrusts, and then he’d shift and snap his hips up to sink Jimmy into him in a rush. Elliot did it randomly, just wanting to hear Jimmy’s reaction. Jimmy cried out in pleasure every time. With each taunting roll of Elliot’s hips, Jimmy’s thrusts became more powerful and erratic, until he was no longer even attempting a rhythm. He was merely pounding into Elliot with every ounce of strength he had. Elliot lost interest in his game quickly enough. The force and impact of Jimmy’s body against him jarred his control, and out of instinct he rocked himself back just a little more, only to yell out ecstatically as Jimmy’s cock sent streaks of electricity zinging through him. “That’s it,” Jimmy urged breathlessly against the shell of Elliot’s ear. “Jesus!” Elliot ground out as Jimmy hit just the right spot again. Jimmy tightened his fingers in Elliot’s hair, holding him motionless with his arm wrapped over the top of his head as he thrust into him. He ducked his head against Elliot’s neck and concentrated on
nothing but hitting that same spot, over and over. It didn’t take long for Elliot to howl and start begging. “Please! Oh, Jesus, please… need to come,” Elliot gasped, trying to slide his hand between them to touch his cock. Jimmy reached down and grabbed the hand. He pinned it hard to the mattress beside Elliot’s head as he sped up his efforts, rolling his hips with each thrust to make certain he was hitting the right spot. “Jesus! Oh, God… Jimmy!” Elliot yelled hoarsely as his body tightened up even more but wouldn’t let go. Jimmy growled at him urgently, but he was already too close to stop himself. His entire body locked down for a moment and he cried out against Elliot’s damp skin, then his erratic motion started once more and he was riding out an orgasm that threatened to take his mind with it. It was the crazy movement that sent Elliot up in flames, and he threw back his head in a gasping cry as he came so hard he thought he’d pass out, made all the more impactful by the feel of Jimmy’s body twitching against him. When Jimmy finally stopped moving, he very nearly collapsed on top of Elliot, with every intention of staying like that. But he stole one more lazy kiss and then carefully pulled out before rolling to the side and falling bonelessly. Elliot whined softly and straightened out on the bed. Slowly he stretched, feeling the lethargy steal through him. He took a breath and curled on his side. “Mmm, ’fore I go to sleep, you want me to make myself scarce?” Elliot asked. Jimmy opened his eyes to stare into the dimness. He huffed a little laugh and covered his forehead with his arm. “Unless you want me to lock you in the fridge with the other victims,” he joked, stalling until he could decide on a real answer. “Is the fridge as big as this bed?” Elliot drawled sleepily. “My whole rig is big, baby,” Jimmy drawled out, not able to even finish before he began laughing. Elliot snickered against the pillow where he drowsed. “You decide you want me to go, just kick me out,” he said, already half-asleep.
Jimmy looked over at him and smirked slightly. He reached over and swiped his hand through the mess on Elliot’s belly, then he rolled carefully out of the bed and grabbed a towel to clean up. He switched on a dim overhead light as he did so, and caught sight of his cell phone with three missed calls waiting. “I’m going to step out for a minute, return some calls, go wash up a little,” he told Elliot softly as he began to dress haphazardly. The tall man still sprawled on the bed hummed sleepily, but didn’t move. Jimmy looked over him for a second and then left the rig quietly. It was a full fifteen minutes later, and Jimmy still hadn’t returned, when Elliot’s cell phone chimed from the floor. Broken out of his pleasant doze, Elliot groaned miserably. He did not want to move. Not at all. When the phone chimed a second time through the ring tone, he growled, crawled to the side of the bed and felt around on the floor for his jeans. He dragged out the phone and lay back down even as he answered the call. “Yeah?” he asked sleepily. “Howdy, Millis,” McLean’s voice crooned to him. “Mmm,” Elliot yawned and mumbled. “It’s my chronic insomniac neighbor. I’m sleepin’.” “I’m sorry,” McLean offered earnestly. “I was just returning your call.” Elliot sighed and turned his head on the pillow. “That’s okay. Sorry I missed you earlier. I actually called once not to complain,” he pointed out. “Oh, yeah?” McLean asked in amusement. calling? Have you kept your end of our bargain?”
“Why were you
Eyes blinking open, Elliot shifted unconsciously, and he could feel the aftereffects of his encounter with Jimmy. “Uh. Actually, yeah,” he admitted. “Yeah?” McLean asked with a small laugh. “Good boy.” Elliot snorted. “Yeah. It was good.” “You take notes?” McLean teased. Clearing his throat, Elliot pressed his lips together. “You weren’t serious,” he chanced.
McLean made a pfftt noise and then sighed heavily. “I’ll guess it’ll do. Although you’re still grumpy.” Elliot smiled and snuggled down against the pillow, letting the warmth steal back over him, making a negative sound before sighing. “You want details, fine. But you gotta keep your side of the deal first.” “Done, my friend,” McLean drawled. “Although, I have to admit, I hadn’t really intended to,” he added thoughtfully. “Those details will have to wait ’til later, too. I left my end of the bargain asleep in my rig.” “Too much to share in a minute flat, huh?” Elliot poked. “Shut up,” McLean huffed. Elliot laughed aloud as he rolled to his back and ran his free hand down the front of his body. “I hope you had as good a time as I did,” he said. “Now you have to quit teasing me.” “I’ll quit teasing you,” McLean promised. “And I’m pretty sure I couldn’t have had much more fun.” “Christ. Like you need a reason to be more happy,” Elliot muttered, rubbing his hand over one thigh and straying to the side. “There are advantages to being happy,” McLean practically growled into the phone. “Mmmmm.” Elliot smiled, letting his eyes close and thinking of Jimmy in his arms. “I’ll give you that one.” McLean exhaled heavily, like he might have been smoking, and he laughed softly. “I’ll let you get back to sleep, Millis,” he murmured in a low voice. “You get some rest, too. Or not,” Elliot added with a grin. “Since your part of the deal is still in your rig.” He chuckled. “Mm hmm,” McLean growled. “Go on. I’ll talk to you later.” Elliot shut off the connection and tossed his phone back onto his jeans in the floor before sliding onto his back again, one hand under the sheet. Several minutes later Jimmy’s stomping footsteps reached his ears, and then the door opened and Jimmy clambered into the rig, smelling faintly of smoke. He stopped short, peering at Elliot as if he wasn’t sure if he was awake.
Elliot rolled to his side. “Hey.” He looked Jimmy up and down and wondered if the man would kick him out or be up to another round. McLean’s teasing had gotten him riled up again. And Jimmy looked very edible. Jimmy grinned at him and once again hung his hat on the hook next to him. He closed the door securely and made his way carefully over to the bed. “Look what the cat drug in,” he drawled happily. “Meeeeowwwwww,” Elliot drew out huskily. Jimmy bent over and kissed him without further warning, slowly pushing him to his back and crawling into bed to drape himself on top of him. Falling backward, Elliot slid both hands along Jimmy’s sides and closed them over his ass, kissing him back messily. Jimmy pushed up onto his hands and knees and looked down at Elliot, grinning. “You’re going to stay the night, right?” he asked. “I suppose I could consider that an invitation,” Elliot replied with a wink. “One I’m quite pleased to accept, considering it comes along with this gorgeous rear end.” Which he squeezed meaningfully. “If I let you stay, do you plan to do things to it?” Jimmy asked with a smirk. “Fun things? Things that would disturb my sleep?” “Oh, you can count on that,” Elliot affirmed. “Very disturbing, hot, and memorable things.” “Beautiful,” Jimmy growled as he bent and kissed Elliot again.
SHUTTING the door quietly behind him, Elliot slid the jacket off his shoulders and hung it up carefully. He knew he was moving woodenly, by rote, but he simply didn’t have the energy for anything else. He rubbed his eyes and looked around the small hotel room with a sigh before moving to collapse on the bed and cover his eyes with one arm. His phone beeped. Elliot moved his arm and turned his head to look at the cell phone on the bedside table. He’d left it here, knowing it wouldn’t do him any good to carry it. Not for the past five days. With a tired sigh he reached for it and checked the missed calls. Three – all from McLean, two days apart each. But no messages.
Laying back against the pillows, Elliot held the cool phone against his cheek. He really, really wanted to call the man. They were friends. Good friends. And he sure could use one right now. He rolled to one side, trying to make up his mind. It took feeling the damp pillowcase to urge him on – he flippin’ hated crying. “Dangit,” he muttered, and he hit the speed dial button for McLean. “Wong’s Laundry; if it has to be white, it has to be Wong, how may I help you?” McLean’s voice greeted cheerfully. McLean’s chipper answer pulled a choke out of Elliot and he pushed his face into the pillow for a moment as he tried to decide whether to laugh or cry some more. He spoke up, quietly, his exhaustion clear. “Hey.” “Millis?” McLean asked in a completely different tone. “You okay?” Elliot sighed shakily. “No,” he admitted. “What’s wrong?” McLean demanded worriedly. “Um. I’m at home,” Elliot said. “Had a funeral.” McLean cursed softly. “I’m sorry,” he offered feelingly. Elliot rolled to his back and rubbed his face. “Sorry I didn’t call back sooner.” “Don’t worry about it,” McLean answered. “You need to talk?” “Wanted to hear from somebody friendly. I’m not exactly… welcome. Here.” Elliot stared at the ceiling as the hurt swelled. God, he hated coming home. “I see,” McLean murmured, although it was clear that he didn’t really. “I’m sorry, man. I wish I was close enough to meet up somewhere.” Elliot snorted. “Yeah. You’re hell and gone from where I am, no matter where you are,” he said. “I’m out of here in a few days. I have to take care of some legal stuff. God, I hate it here,” he said, just rambling, really. He’d had no one to talk to for almost a week.
McLean was silent, obviously not wanting to ask any painful questions. He merely listened as Elliot rambled. “It was my aunt, see? She was the only one left up here who’d even talk to me, much less recognize me as family. I’m sorta the black sheep, I guess.” Elliot voice was bitter. “But she was always good to me, and I guess she figured I never got a fair shake.” “Hey, even if you don’t have family, you’ve got friends, right? Friends are just family you get to pick out.” Elliot smiled slightly. “Yeah. Picked you, didn’t I?” He didn’t even realize what he’d said, he was so tired. “I’m glad you did,” McLean responded softly. “Yeah. Me too.” Elliot relaxed a little, rolling his neck from side to side before sighing again. “She left me everything, man. Everything. And the rest of the family is pissed.” “What sort of everything are you talking about?” McLean asked with an audible frown. Elliot laughed, a high thin tone. “She owned one of the biggest ranches around, probably in the state. Land. Lots and lots and lots of land.” He made a strangled noise. “What am I supposed to do with land? I’m a flippin’ truck driver!” “You could… drive your truck around it?” McLean suggested weakly. Elliot snickered, then chuckled, then laughed, but it was tired and pained. “Christ. She was rich. Really rich. And they are out for my blood. So I gotta figure out what to do. Hence, legal stuff. I wish I knew why she left it all to me. This is not my area of expertise.” “Maybe that’s why,” McLean answered. “There’s nothing more detrimental to a successful business than someone who thinks they know about it. Maybe you’re supposed to hire someone who can run a ranch and leave it to them.” Elliot thought about that for a few minutes, leaving the connection open but quiet. “Maybe so,” he said quietly. He fell quiet for a while again before he realized he was zoning out to the sound of McLean’s truck running wide open somewhere. “Thanks for listening, McLean.”
“That’s what I’m here for,” McLean assured him. “You sound like you need rest,” he added. “Yeah,” Elliot said tonelessly. “It’s been terrible around here.” “Do yourself a favor; get some rest. Grieve. Give yourself some time and don’t worry about people who don’t care about you. If you need me, call me any time. Okay?” Elliot looked at the ceiling, wondering how the heck he’d lucked out to find this man who’d become such a good friend. “Yeah. I think I’ll be able to sleep now,” he murmured. “Give it a while,” McLean advised gently. “If you can’t, you know where to find me. I’m sorry for your loss, friend.” “Thanks. You drive safe, now,” Elliot instructed as he got sleepier and turned to his side. “Always,” McLean assured him. “Sleep well,” he offered before ending the call and leaving Elliot alone to the silence. Closing the phone and curling his hand around it, Elliot slid it under his pillow and kept his unfocused gaze on the blank wall until, after a few minutes, he closed his eyes and went to sleep.
“GOD, thank God, thank God,” Elliot muttered as he got off the jet and walked into the airport. “Thank God that’s over. Next time I’m driving,” he muttered. “I don’t care if it’s a 20-hour drive.” He didn’t have to get luggage since he just had a carry on, so he went straight to meet the company courier who would drive him to the terminal an hour away. Once he got settled in the car, he pulled out his phone and hit the speed dial for McLean. It rang several times, then McLean answered with a slightly confused, hoarse, “Yeah?” Elliot smiled. He forgot that it was only about 9 a.m. “Good morning. Rise and shine!” He was able to actually inject some of his grin into the words. “Ohhhh, fuck you very much,” McLean muttered with a yawn. Elliot snickered. “C’mon, sunshine, you know you love me.”
“Doesn’t mean I like it,” McLean grumbled. He yawned loudly again and then growled under his breath. “All right, where’s the fire?” he asked. “About an hour away,” Elliot said, restraining himself from bouncing in his seat. “Truck, sweet truck.” “Congratulations,” McLean offered flatly. “Urrrrgh,” he added. Elliot raspberried at him. “I thought you’d be happy for me,” he said in mock offense. “Besides. It’s 9. Even you should be up and moving by now.” “Yeah,” McLean agreed sedately. “I’m happy for you, man.” Elliot grinned. “I just wanted to say thank you again.” His voice was lower, calmer. Sincere. “No need,” McLean muttered hoarsely. “That’s what friends are for, you know?” he said, just before a coughing fit interrupted him. A frown turned Elliot’s lips down. “McLean? You okay? That cough sounds bad.” “Shut up,” McLean managed in between coughs. “I learned that you never have to take a piss so badly that you don’t put on your boots before you go outside, all right?” “Dang, man, where was your brain?” Elliot muttered. “Try a cup or something. Crap. How sick are you?” “Not too sick,” McLean answered defensively. “Shut up.” Elliot sighed. “You got anyone to look after you? Head home for awhile?” “I save my sick days for when I’m not sick, know what I mean?” McLean mumbled. “Dangit, McLean. Don’t tell me you’re still on the log?” Elliot said in disbelief. McLean was moving now as he spoke, clearing his throat and coughing softly. “And I’m running behind a little,” he admitted. “If I don’t get moving in the next hour, anyway.” “Jesus, McLean, take one day, at least,” Elliot pleaded.
“Why?” McLean asked in a weak, scratchy voice that didn’t seem to fit him. “What’s gonna happen if you fall asleep at the wheel? Tell me that.” “I won’t fall asleep at the wheel,” McLean answered in a tired voice. “Yeah, you sound so sure of yourself,” Elliot said sharply. “Come on, use some of that copious common sense you’re always dishing out to me.” “Why are you busting my balls, man?” McLean asked almost pitifully. “Sounds like someone needs to,” Elliot said fiercely. “Promise me. Stay put one day. Promise!” “Promise you what?” McLean asked carefully. Elliot sighed. “Promise me you’ll stay put for 24 hours. Starting now.” “Can’t, man. Sorry,” McLean responded quietly. “Jesus,” Elliot muttered. “Fine. Plug in your dang phone then. Got a headset?” “No,” McLean answered in a slightly ashamed voice. “What the heck do you do when you talk to me all the time?” Elliot asked in disbelief. “Hold the phone and talk into the little speaker holes,” McLean answered matter-of-factly. “Do you have any idea how dangerous that is?” Elliot said, voice rising. “Don’t you even have a speaker phone?” “I can’t hear on a speaker phone. What is wrong with you?” McLean asked incredulously. “You need to keep both hands on the wheel,” Elliot said through gritted teeth. McLean was silent for a long moment. “Will both elbows do?” he finally asked with a slight smirk.
Elliot buried his face in one hand, clasping the phone close and rocking forward. “McLean,” he murmured. “You’re gonna flippin’ kill yourself.” “Not on purpose,” McLean assured him. Elliot sighed. “Please. Be careful. Now that Alice is gone, you’re the only friend I’ve got.” “I’m sorry, Millis,” McLean offered. Staying quiet for a long minute, Elliot finally came up with something to say. “Call me when you park for the day. Please?” he said quietly. “You got it,” McLean muttered before another coughing fit took him. “Be careful,” Elliot repeated before cutting the connection. He leaned back and closed his eyes. The courier driver sitting next to him glanced to him in sympathy, but didn’t say anything. It was going to be a long day.
OFFLOADING several more cases, Elliot leaned on the rollers and wiped his brow as the employees scrambled to catch up with him. He rolled his eyes. Four people, and they couldn’t pick up the cases and shove them onto carts faster than he could load them onto the rollers in the first place. Then one of them shouted into the half-empty trailer that they needed a break, and they disappeared inside the building, thumping the door shut behind them. Elliot stared for a long moment before looking significantly up at the ceiling of the boiling hot trailer. Cursing a blue streak, he kicked a couple of boxes out of the way and stalked to the end of the trailer, emerging out of the oven into the sunshine and a decent breeze. He muttered as he grabbed his cell phone off his belt and punched a button. “Roadkill Cafe,” McLean’s voice greeted happily, “You kill it, we grill it!” “I’ve got some flippin’ pansies to grill, ’cause I’m already baked to a crisp, and they took a flippin’ break,” Elliot growled.
There was a brief silence, and then McLean began to chuckle. “What’s shakin’, Millis?” he asked in amusement. “Besides your brains?” “They’re bakin’, not shakin’,” Elliot muttered, flopping down on the edge of the trailer. “It’s only 90 degrees out here, with a nice breeze, and they wimped out only halfway through the trailer,” he whined. “You need to learn to embrace your hotness, Millis,” McLean chastised good-naturedly. A loud bang sounded in the background, and he grunted as if it might have scared him. “Just remember, it’s fun to be all sweaty and gross when you walk into the Travel Center,” he continued without acknowledging the sound. “Fun?” Elliot snorted. “That’s a fact of life, for me, man. I have to do laundry twice a week.” He growled again as the door opened slightly and one of the girls peeked out, just as quickly slamming the door shut. “What?!” he yelled. “You think I’m taking off??” “Hey,” McLean said with an almost audible frown. “Calm down, friend,” he advised in a low, soothing voice. “No use getting yourself all worked up over it.” Elliot’s anger subsided a bit as McLean talked to him. The other man’s voice had a soothing effect Elliot didn’t understand, but he was too annoyed to really think about it. “Flippin’ pansies,” he said under his breath again before huffing and leaning back on the wooden floor of the trailer. “I prefer daisies, myself,” McLean cooed to him. It was obvious that he was trying to distract Elliot. “Lilies, maybe.” Grunting, Elliot sighed. “You’re a goddang sunflower, you know that?” he said amiably as he stared at the metal roof above him. “Sunflower?” McLean echoed in confusion as another loud bang sounded in the background. “Yeah. Bright and sunny. Unfreakinbelieveably happy,” Elliot grumbled. “And what the heck is going on there?” “They’re just digging post holes or something,” McLean answered distractedly. “One of those big thumpy things,” he added. “Bright and sunny?” he asked dubiously.
“Yeah, you. Bright and sunny,” Elliot said, ignoring the sounds coming over the phone now. “That’s you. Even in the middle of the flippin’ night, you’re cheerful.” He shifted a little on the wood. “It’s unnatural,” he complained. “I’m sorry,” McLean laughed. “You want me to be all doom and gloom for you?” Elliot sniffed and sighed. “Nah. I’m enough doom and gloom for both of us.” He rapped his other hand on the floor in boredom. “I just needed to vent so I wouldn’t strangle one of them,” he said apologetically. “Hey, I don’t mind,” McLean said. “You’re the only person I know who doesn’t bitch at me when I look on the bright side,” he sniggered, almost unable to say the words through his laughter. Biting his lip, Elliot tried not to smile. “Dangit, McLean, I’m trying to be cranky here.” “And you’re soooo very good at it,” McLean crooned, nearly breaking into song as he said it. Elliot snickered before he could stop it, and then broke into a hearty laugh. “You dickhead,” he said fondly. “You’re making me actually like you.” “That’s my evil plan,” McLean told him seriously. “Lord. Like you could be evil,” Elliot scoffed. “I could try,” McLean insisted.
“I would put forth a valiant
effort.” “Valiant, courageous, trustworthy and forthright, I’m sure,” Elliot agreed. “But never evil.” “Fine,” McLean sighed in between two louder thumps. “Okay, you killed it, already!” McLean shouted as he held the phone away from his mouth. Elliot blinked and sat up. “Thought you said they were digging post holes,” he said. “I lied a little bit,” McLean admitted shamelessly. “I’m actually sitting on top of my rig, right now. There’s a bull in the middle of the road, they’re trying to tranquilize him. I figured you wouldn’t believe me,” he snickered.
Elliot just stared out across the lot. Then he cleared his throat. “You’re right.” He frowned. “A bull?” “Bigass bull,” McLean assured him. “It tried to mate with my rig.” Elliot was speechless. “Hello?” McLean ventured. “I couldn’t make this shit up, man,” he laughed. Shaking himself, Elliot groaned. “No, I don’t suppose you could. Some of the crap you live through is beyond Hollywood.” “That’s cause I’m awesome,” McLean crooned again, then began laughing before he could make the claim really stick. “Hey, hold on a minute, okay? I have to get off the roof.” “Okay,” Elliot said, kicking his feet back and forth. He took off his baseball cap and rubbed his hand through his sweaty hair. He heard a series of thumps, grunts, and finally clatter and a muffled curse that was followed by laughter. A moment later, McLean came back, still laughing breathlessly. “Apparently, it’s quicker when you fall,” he observed in amusement. “What? Fall?” Elliot squawked. “Don’t worry about it, my entire lower half is made of titanium,” McLean told him in all seriousness. He grunted as he hefted himself up into his rig and the sound of the door slamming echoed in the background. “Stupid cow,” he muttered. “Titanium?” Elliot said, now really worried. “You say that like it’s happened before.” “I either have shit for luck or I’m very clumsy,” McLean told him with a laugh. “Possibly both,” he added thoughtfully. “Jesus,” Elliot swore. “And you drive a big rig?” “Hazardous materials big rig,” McLean corrected. Elliot stared off into the distance as a shiver ran through him. An accident prone driver hauling hazardous materials. It almost sounded like a bad joke. “How the heck do you swing that?” he finally asked incredulously. “Avoid blind-side backs?”
“Skill overrides luck most of the time,” McLean answered seriously. “It’s just the occasional moo-cow in the road that trips me up.” “And that happens a lot. Cows. And bulls. And buffalo,” Elliot said wryly. “I’ve never run into a buffalo,” McLean corrected. “Just seen them.” “Lots of them,” Elliot corrected, then turned his chin as the door opened and the staff trudged out. “Well, well. Here they come,” he said dryly. “Things are looking up already, my little daisy,” McLean said sweetly. “Shut up,” Elliot muttered good-naturedly. “It’ll take them ten minutes to catch up with me, still.” He shifted to stand up on the edge of the trailer. “Hey, Millis,” McLean murmured in a low voice. “Try to look on the shiny side of things,” he advised. “I worry about you.” Elliot frowned a little and shuffled sideways. “What for?” he asked. “Man can only take so much anger, you know?” McLean answered softly. Elliot wrinkled his nose. “I only yell at them a little bit,” he muttered. “Ain’t them I’m worried about,” McLean told him sternly. “Look, I gotta go, friend. Call me if you need to vent again, okay?” “Yeah, okay,” Elliot said, still confused, and it was clear in his voice. “Drive safe. Watch for cows.” “Hey,” McLean huffed, “they’re a dangerous animal,” he insisted, ruining it with another snicker. “Be good,” he offered, then the connection was cut and Elliot was left to his own devices. Elliot brought down the cell and looked at it oddly. Be good, McLean had said. A man can only take so much anger. Elliot blinked and straightened. McLean was talking about him? “Huh.”
“Hey, we’re ready for more,” one of the staff complained. Elliot turned his chin and narrowed his eyes, prepared to snap at him, but he paused and looked back at the phone. “Yeah, okay,” he answered evenly instead of his normal snarl. “Huh,” he said as he went back to tossing boxes on the rollers.
ELLIOT tossed his duffel in the floor and flopped on the bed with a groan. Finally, the end of a long, extra long week. Now he had three days off, and he didn’t plan on moving this truck a single inch for at least two of those days. He sighed happily and stretched all the way out on the mattress, head touching one side of the truck, shoes flat against the other. Horizontal sounded soooooo good. But he wasn’t at all tired. Dangit. His phone began to ring as if on cue. Elliot let out a long, quiet hiss of breath before lifting his head, bending at the neck only, to look past his feet to where the phone lay on the cabinet next to the bed. With a soft growl, he sat up without using his arms and shifted to snatch up the phone. When he saw the name, the irritation disappeared, and he pushed the answer button. “Hey,” he said, smiling. “Hi,” McLean greeted sedately. “You got some time?” Elliot chuckled as he lay back down and got comfortable, toeing off his shoes. “For you, nothing but. I just parked and I ain’t movin’ for at least two days.” McLean gave a rueful snort. “I just needed to hear a friendly voice,” he admitted candidly. “Don’t get lonely often, but when I do, I start moping.” “Lonely, huh? Happy sunflower like you? I don’t believe it.” Elliot stuffed another pillow under his head. “You shouldn’t tease a pitiful man,” McLean chastised. “It’s like kicking a puppy.” “I’d never kick a puppy,” Elliot assured him. “So what’s up?”
“I’m lonesome,” McLean muttered. “I’m stuck for the night in the middle of nowhere and I got no one to do and nothing to talk to.” Elliot chuckled. “Well, I can’t help you with the first one, but I suppose I could throw myself on the tracks for the second.” He paused. “Is it a full moon?” he asked. “I don’t know,” McLean muttered. “Why?” he asked warily. “’Cause it sounds like we’ve switched brains. So. How did you end up stuck in the middle of nowhere?” “Drove there,” McLean answered. Elliot stayed silent, waiting. “In my truck,” McLean added after a moment. Elliot rolled his eyes, bit his lip, and waited. “What?” McLean asked defensively. Elliot sighed. “So you didn’t get stuck in the middle of nowhere voluntarily?” “Well, I ran my hours up,” McLean answered. “I’m in Bumfuck, Nebraska.” “Ewww. Find anything besides corn and prairie dogs?” “Prairie and corn dogs. And I found you,” McLean answered immediately, then cleared his throat as if he was embarrassed over the instinctive answer. Elliot blinked at the roof of the truck. “Well, yeah, I guess,” he answered slowly. “Thanks to modern technology. Since I’m not physically in Nebraska.” McLean cleared his throat again. phone,” he said gamely.
“I got an earpiece for my
Elliot broke into a smile. “That’s great. I’m glad. You’ll be much safer now.” He nodded to himself. “Well… it’s easier to sing to my girls, anyway,” McLean laughed, still obviously embarrassed. “That’s great, McLean. Now I won’t worry,” Elliot said. “I’ve had mine since they came out with the dang things. I love it. Especially when I get lo… uh....” “What was that?” McLean asked in confusion.
Elliot smacked his palm against his forehead. “It’s great for when I get lost,” he muttered. “Lost?” McLean echoed teasingly. “You get lost often, do you?” Elliot growled softly. “I’ve not got a… good sense of direction,” he claimed. McLean chuckled; a low, gleefully mischievous sound. “Shut up,” Elliot muttered. But he was smiling. He’d gotten McLean to laugh, at least. “They love me at OnStar!” “Oh, Jesus, OnStar,” McLean groaned. “What? What’s wrong with OnStar?” Elliot asked, frowning. “They’ve saved my butt more than once.” “I have this handheld navigation system that works pretty well,” McLean drawled. “Yeah? What is it?” Elliot asked. “A map,” McLean answered dryly. “A map,” Elliot repeated. “A map. The man tells me to use a map.” He grimaced. “I can’t read when I drive,” he murmured. “Shouldn’t drive when you’re lost, either,” McLean snickered. “Dickhead,” Elliot said, resigned. “Not my fault I get carsick.” There was silence on the line for a brief moment before McLean burst out laughing. He laughed so hard that he could barely catch his breath, and he finally wheezed, “You get carsick?” Elliot grinned at the roof. The embarrassment was worth it. “Yeah,” he said on a sigh. “I can ride cross-country. But put a book in my hands and I turn green. I can manage streets signs, that’s about it.” McLean continued to laugh, nearly giggling as Elliot listened to him. “Oh, gracious,” he finally sighed in amusement. “Hmph.” Elliot hoped he sounded offended enough. “Well, I’m glad you’re amused.” And he was. He really was. McLean sighed softly. “Are you amused, Millis?”
Elliot couldn’t hold back the grin. “Yeah, I am,” he admitted. “I got you laughing, so I’m happy, too.” “I’m glad,” McLean told him earnestly. don’t seem amused by life,” he said hesitantly.
“Usually, you… you
“Amused, huh?” Elliot thought about that. “No, I don’t guess so. I mean, sometimes. But otherwise, life is what it is.” He shrugged. “Life is a ride,” McLean advised. “Me, I tend to enjoy it. A lot,” he laughed. “Hey, you know what? When you retire, you’re gonna come live with me, and I’m gonna teach you how to enjoy life.” Elliot snorted. “Retire? I’ll never retire. Gotta have money to… uh.” He hummed, remembering his recent inheritance. “Well, maybe I’ll take you up on that,” he said quietly. “Yeah?” McLean asked seriously. “’Cause I’m serious, man. I need someone rich to keep me up in my old age,” he added with a smirk in his voice. Elliot barked out a laugh. “Well, sure, we could make a trade of it. Heck, if those papers were right, I won’t need Social Security, that’s for dang sure.” He paused. “I could probably retire now,” he muttered. “Would that make you happy?” McLean asked curiously. “I honestly have no idea what I’d do with myself,” Elliot said, voice low. “Never thought about it.” “Yeah,” McLean mused. “I think when I’m done driving, I’ll still be a wanderer, you know? I’ve never managed to stay in one place for too long.” “I never managed to find one place I’d like to stay,” Elliot said distantly. “Seen most of the country, and a lot of it’s real nice, you know? But… got no reason to settle somewhere. So I might as well drive.” “I hiked the Appalachian Trail when I was 16. I’d like to do that again,” McLean shared. “You a walker?” “I’m a driver,” Elliot said wryly. “I was already driving a local route at age sixteen.” McLean waited, the silence between them thoughtful and comfortable. “You want to walk it with me some day?” he asked finally, his voice tentative and almost shy.
Elliot sat up slowly, a bemused expression on his face. “Yeah,” he said slowly. “Yeah. I think I’d like that.” And to Elliot’s surprise, it was true. “Good,” McLean whispered. “I look forward to it, Millis.” Realizing he was grinning like a fool at the roof as he stretched back out, Elliot cleared his throat. “Yeah,” he said, a little uncomfortable, and he talked to cover it. “I don’t know what I’ve done that I could share. Unless you’ve never been to a baseball game.” “Never have,” McLean admitted. “College football, all the way.” “Never have? baseball!”
Never?” Elliot exclaimed.
“But… but it’s
“Eh,” McLean offered carelessly. “If it ain’t orange, it don’t do it for me,” he snickered. “The Orioles are orange,” Elliot answered immediately. “And the Tigers.” “Shut up,” McLean laughed fondly. “I have a limited span of attention, I need carnage and loud noises to keep my eyes on the game.” “We have carnage! We have loud noises!” Elliot insisted passionately. “What about when the benches clear? When the pitcher throws a no-hitter? When a guy hits a bottom of the ninth, two out grand slam home run to win the game?” “Baseball games have beer, right?” McLean asked, pretending to be unfazed by Elliot’s passion. “Beer?” Elliot was thrown for a few moments. “Uh. Yes?” “Then I’m in,” McLean snickered. Elliot pulled the phone away from his ear to stare at it. Then he lifted it back. “Lemme get this straight. You’ll go to a baseball game with me, but I have to buy you beer?” “I’ll buy it,” McLean answered defensively. Elliot started to laugh, full and loud. “Okay then. Ooh. Hey! Maybe after we retire, we can drive around the country and go to all the ballparks. I’ve always wanted to do that.” “In an RV?” McLean laughed.
“Crap, man, we could have an awesome RV,” Elliot defended. “Plenty of space, full-size refrigerator, tall shower, satellite TV... hey, maybe one of those tall tour buses. I need a tall shower.” “Oh, yeah? You’re a big guy, huh?” “I guess so. Tall family. Sometimes I wonder how I ended up in a truck,” Elliot wondered. “You can park RVs free overnight at WalMarts,” he added suddenly. “Even in Florida.” “That’s… really unusual of you to know offhand,” McLean observed. “Saw a sign posted once when I was delivering nearby. Asked about it,” Elliot said. “I wonder if you can park overnight at ballparks...” he murmured, closing his eyes as he thought about driving around just to watch baseball games. With McLean. Lord, what must McLean be like to travel with? He smiled. “Likely not,” McLean answered in a content voice. “But we know all the spots,” he added confidently. “We could go all over the country without deadlines or worrying about hours. Man, that sounds nice,” he said wistfully. “Yeah. Wouldn’t take long to get anywhere, since I like to drive early and you like to drive late,” Elliot pointed out. “That’d give us all day to do whatever.” McLean was silent, the soft sound of his breathing the only sound coming over the line. Finally, he sighed unsteadily. “I think this is the first time I’ve ever… really wanted to retire,” he admitted in a surprised, almost nervous voice. Elliot blinked his eyes open. “Figured by the way you were talking, you had it all planned out,” he said quietly. “Just… airing it out,” McLean admitted. “I’m not really good at being alone, you know? And before tonight, retirement always meant alone to me.” “You’re a truck driver,” Elliot said, confused. “You’re almost always alone.”
“Yeah,” McLean agreed almost sadly. “Doesn’t mean it suits me. Why do you think I’m on the phone with you, begging not to be lonely?” he laughed weakly. Elliot was quiet for a long moment. “You’re not alone. Won’t ever be, while I’m around,” he said seriously. McLean was a good friend, and Elliot was willing to work as hard as he needed to make sure he was as good a friend to him. “Thanks,” McLean whispered with difficulty. Millis.”
“Thank you,
“Hey, don’t think twice, McLean,” Elliot said, trying to brush it off as nothing. “Just so you know you got somebody to call. Even at oh-myGod o’clock in the middle of the night.” “Means a lot to me,” McLean told him. “Enough that I might even give baseball a chance,” he added slyly. Elliot felt that warm flush of embarrassment again. “Hey, that’s great then,” he said shakily. He drew a steadying breath. “And I figure if I can unload a whole trailer in one day, I can manage a hike through some little mountains.” “Georgia to Maine,” McLean cooed with something like delight. “Almost 2,200 miles of nothing but the scenery, the bears, and your buddies.” “2,200 miles?!” Elliot yelped, sitting straight up without thinking and bonking his head on the cabinet above him hard enough that he dropped the phone and saw stars. “Millis?” McLean’s voice called over the headset. “Owwww,” Elliot groaned, rubbing the top of his head. He swept his hand around to find the phone and brought to his ear as he lay down and curled on his side in a fetal position. “Owwwww.” “You okay? What happened?” McLean demanded worriedly. “I sat up too fast,” Elliot mumbled, rubbing the spot that ached badly. “Aww,” McLean offered teasingly. “Got all excited about the prospect of spending several months alone with me and a sleeping bag, huh?” he joked.
“Outside. In the mountains. With bears,” Elliot muttered, but he wasn’t too proud not to play it up. “Owwwwwww.” McLean laughed softly. “Should I let you get to bed?” he asked. Elliot’s eyes shot open. “Not sleepy,” he assured him. “We can talk some more… unless you’d rather, ah, you’re getting tired.” McLean was silent for a moment. “I’m not too tired,” he finally answered. “Talk to me some more, Millis,” he requested gently. “Tell me about our retirement.”
JIMMY Vaughan’s boot heels crunched on the gravel as he hopped out of his rig. He pushed his hat back and looked around appraisingly, then closed the door with a solid thunk and shrugged into one of his soft, tacky western-style flannel shirts. He let his hand drag across the red McLean diamond painted on the side of his rig as he made his way toward the travel center. He whistled as he walked into the TA Center, but his steps were dragging slightly and his shoulders slumped almost imperceptibly as he stepped through the automatic doors and looked around. He took off his hat and nodded to the lady behind the convenience counter. “Heya, handsome. Whatcha need?” the woman drawled. “Directions,” Jimmy drawled to her with an easy smile as he leaned against the counter. “And a pack of Marlboros.” She smiled, grabbed a pack off the rack behind her, and started ringing it up. “Whatcha looking for? Big city, you know.” “Nearest really nice hotel,” Jimmy answered as he pulled his wallet out of his back pocket. “Really nice? How nice are we talking, dollar-wise? Three sixtyseven,” she said. Jimmy paid her and looked around the store distractedly. “Nicest one nearby. I need room service,” he joked with a grin. “Ahhh, room service. Well then,” she took the money and looked contemplative. “Probably downtown’s your best bet. There’s a Marriott, a Hilton… I’d say the Westin. That’s real uptown. Classy.”
Jimmy grinned mischievously, though the emotion didn’t really fill his tired eyes. “They got big rig parking down there?” he asked. She laughed. “Not downtown, no. But you can park here. There’s a twice-daily shuttle downtown, since that’s where Busch Stadium is.” “When’s that come?” Jimmy asked as he took his change and his pack of cigarettes. “’Bout six. Hour from now. depending on start time.”
Runs more on ballgame days,
“Well, thank you for your help,” he said with a big smile and his most pronounced Tennessee drawl. “You have a good night.” “You, too, honey. Oh, by the way, better clean up if you’re going down there. I wasn’t kidding about high class. There’s other places, real nice, down there, too, that aren’t quite so schmanzy,” she said. Jimmy grinned at her and slid his hat back on top of his head. She just laughed as he went on his way.
ELLIOT clomped down out of the truck with a grumble and slammed the door shut. Hitching his duffel on one shoulder, he headed for the TA, an obvious dark cloud over his head. “Stupid dispatcher. Stupid warehouse. Stupid company assignments,” he muttered. He headed through the automatic door and practically ran another guy down since he wasn’t paying much attention to where he was walking. Jimmy flailed and grabbed onto him to keep his feet, and his beatup old hat went fluttering to the ground at their feet as they struggled to keep their balance. Finally, Jimmy took hold of the bigger man’s shoulders and righted himself, then cocked his head and grinned at his attacker. Bobbling off-balance, Elliot lurched to one side, but when the other guy grabbed him, they both steadied. “Sorry, man….” He turned and tipped his chin to see the road block, and blinked in surprise. While his brain stayed stuck in tapioca, his body sure reacted quickly. “Uh. Hi.” Jimmy. The man who’d turned his insides out with a one-night screw Elliot had relived several times as better-than-good jack-off fodder.
“Hey,” Jimmy laughed as he gave Elliot’s shoulder a pat and then let him go. “You look about as happy as you were last time I saw you,” he observed. Elliot raised an eyebrow and frowned. “Yeah, well, tough week,” he muttered as he took in Jimmy’s appearance. “You look tired, too,” he observed. “Not like… before.” Jimmy raised an eyebrow and gently ushered Elliot back out of the TA. “Before?” he asked curiously. “Uhhh,” Elliot waffled, shuffling a little. “You know. Before. Last time I saw you.” Jimmy grinned and nodded, laughing a little. “Yeah, I bet I did look better then,” he mused. Elliot’s eyes widened. Jimmy looked pretty good now, too. “Didn’t mean it that way,” he scrambled. “Just, you look tired.” It wasn’t often he ran back into someone at all, much less someone he’d had a great night with. “I am tired,” Jimmy admitted freely. “In fact, I’m taking a few nights off, treating myself to a real-life bed.” Elliot actually smiled a little. “Time off, huh?” “Damn straight,” Jimmy affirmed with a slight sparkle in his eyes. “Big fluffy bed, room service,” he crooned. He cocked his head at Elliot as if a thought had just hit him and he quirked a smile. “When was the last time you took a few nights off?” Both Elliot’s brows flew up. “Uh.” He shrugged. “Why don’t you try it with me?” Jimmy asked impulsively. “My treat.” “Uh.” Elliot cocked his head to one side and peered at the other man. Well, they’d had a great lay, after all, and Jimmy was certainly easy on the eyes and easy to get along with. “I’d have to call in,” he said, a bit dazed by the out-of-nowhere offer. Jimmy shrugged and smiled. “Shuttle to downtown leaves at 6,” he told Elliot. “I’ll be in the showers, when you decide.” Elliot felt flushed just thinking about the man nude in the showers. “Okay,” he agreed.
Jimmy smiled and nodded at him, then continued on across the parking lot in an easy gait. Only someone watching him intently would have noticed how exhausted he really was. And Elliot was watching. He didn’t know Jimmy well at all, but even he could recognize the sag in the man’s shoulders. “Huh.” An invite to a nice hotel – big fluffy bed, specifically – and room service. Elliot turned right around and headed for his truck to call in a long weekend off. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d done that.
ELLIOT stood just inside the door Jimmy had opened, looking with wide eyes at the huge room Jimmy had already entered. “Wow,” he said, obviously surprised. The hotel was really nice, yeah, in the lobby and such. But this…. “Wow,” he said again, walking slowly in and looking around. Jimmy surveyed his surroundings and grinned widely, shrugging out of his coat and walking further into the room. He turned around and looked at Elliot with a huge smile. “Hungry?” he asked. Elliot nodded distractedly as he checked out the room’s amenities, and when he walked into the bathroom, he stopped still. “Jimmy, this bathroom is bigger than my whole sleeper!” Jimmy came up to peer over his shoulder, and he breathed out heavily on the back of Elliot’s neck as he looked in. “Jets,” he observed with an evil grin. Shivering, Elliot looked back over his shoulder. “Jets?” He glanced around and his eyes fell upon the huge hot tub. “Jesus. How’d you find this place? Why’d you find this place? Talk about lap of luxury.” “’Cause if I don’t take a break here and there, I’m afraid I’ll burn out,” Jimmy explained as he continued to peer over Elliot’s shoulder. “And I don’t want to burn out, I like rambling too much.” “Huh,” Elliot commented, turning to lean against the door frame and look at Jimmy, who stood about a foot away. “I guess I do, too. That’s why I don’t take breaks.” He shrugged.
Jimmy scowled and reached out and thumped him on the chest. “You need to take breaks,” he scolded. “You’re one of the grumpiest men I know, I swear.” Elliot gave him a little half smile. “I’m not grumpy all the time,” he protested. “No?” Jimmy asked mischievously. “No.” Jimmy looked him over slowly and then shook his head, hiding a smirk. “Don’t believe it,” he sighed as he turned away. “Hey!” Elliot made an offended noise. “I’m not always grumpy. I mean, I’m happy when I get sweet tea after a long day.” “Is that all?” Jimmy asked as he walked into the outer room and looked down at the king size bed. Elliot narrowed his eyes and watched Jimmy move. “I’m happy after a good dinner or if I get some ice cream.” Jimmy turned and looked at him speculatively. “Room service?” he asked with a twitch of his lips. “Well, yeah, that’d make me happy. Get good food brought to me in my own room. Wish I could get delivery to the cab sometimes,” Elliot said, looking from Jimmy to the bed and back. Jimmy followed his eyes to the bed and then looked back at him with a raised eyebrow. Elliot smiled a little and shrugged one shoulder. “I’m happy after great sex.” Jimmy cocked his head and raised the other eyebrow to match the first. “Well, I’d love to make you happy,” he drawled without moving. “Would you, now?” Elliot said, smile growing. He looked Jimmy up and down significantly. “I wondered, when you invited me, if it was a possibility.” “I’m not into torturing myself,” Jimmy informed him dryly. “Sharing a bed with you without indulging a little would be… hard,” he murmured as he returned Elliot’s look with one of his own.
Shifting his weight to stand and pace over toward Jimmy, Elliot stopped a few feet away. “Oh, it’s hard,” he drew out. Jimmy bit his lip to keep from smiling and he merely nodded. He looked sideways and waved his hand at the bed. “Would you care to fuck me senseless?” he asked primly. Elliot’s eyes widened as his gut clenched. “Not one single bit,” he growled. Jimmy swallowed a laugh and grinned, reaching up with one hand to begin unbuttoning his shirt. He nodded at his bag, which he’d sat beside the door. “Look in the side pocket there,” he ordered in a low voice. Mouth crooking, Elliot nodded and went to dig in the pocket, retrieving supplies they’d need. He returned to the bed and tossed them down on the comforter before stepping close and gripping Jimmy’s hips. “I like a man who plans ahead.” Jimmy laughed and let himself flood with heat and anticipation. “Then you ought to love me,” he said, unable to stop grinning. Now Elliot grinned before he leaned to capture Jimmy’s mouth in a hard, wet kiss, ending in his sucking on Jimmy’s lower lip. “Let’s test out that bed,” he rasped before diving in for another kiss as he jerked Jimmy against his body. Jimmy merely groaned in response and allowed himself to be manhandled. It was one of the things he regretted about their last encounter. He hadn’t let the bigger man toss him around at all. Elliot moved to push against Jimmy, using his weight to force him to step backwards even though Elliot clutched him close. He maneuvered Jimmy to the bed’s edge and then shoved him down before Elliot yanked his own shirt over his head as he looked down at him appreciatively. Jimmy looked up at him from his back and grinned. “God, you look good,” he muttered. “Good, huh?” Elliot murmured as he unbuttoned and unzipped his jeans, revealing green cotton underneath. Jimmy snapped his fingers. officiously.
“Get on with it,” he ordered
Elliot frowned down at him, hands on his hips. “Bossy,” he accused. But he did lean over to pull off Jimmy’s shoes and start pulling at his faded jeans. Jimmy lifted his hips to help and licked his lips. “You’ve gotten me through a few long nights, you know that?” he admitted hoarsely. Elliot stopped, his hands on Jimmy’s thighs, and met his eyes. “Yeah, I’ve done the same,” he said. “So make good on it,” Jimmy challenged. Pawing at Jimmy’s jeans, Elliot got them down onto Jimmy’s thighs, then pushed down the cotton of Jimmy’s briefs to free a hard cock – and he immediately went down on it with a soft moan. Jimmy cried out softly and arched his back, twisting his fingers in the fluffy down comforter. Humming and slurping, Elliot didn’t care that he was making a mess – he just wanted Jimmy to be a mess. Oh yeah. He slid his palm around the thick cock and pumped it as he sucked on the flared head, laving at it with his tongue. The taste was bitter and salty – Elliot made a mental note to make sure Jimmy drank a lot of water the next few hours. Jimmy writhed and groaned, muttering incoherently. He reached down and grabbed a handful of Elliot’s hair, pulling at it and sighing plaintively. Elliot chuckled around Jimmy’s cock, sucking hard for a moment before letting it pop out of his lips. “Yes?” he drawled, hand still stroking the hard flesh. “Come on and fuck me, already,” Jimmy growled impatiently. Elliot grinned evilly and grabbed for the bottle of lube. He got on his knees on the bed between Jimmy’s legs. “You gonna stay on your back?” he asked as he popped open the bottle. “How do you want me?” Jimmy asked breathlessly. Waggling his eyebrows, Elliot turned the bottle and drizzled lube over Jimmy’s cock and the creases of his thighs so it ran in cool rivulets between his legs. Jimmy gasped and jerked with the cold. Elliot tossed the bottle to the side after snapping the lid shut and braced his weight on one hand so he could steal a heated kiss as his other hand slid between Jimmy’s legs to spread the lubricant and rub a thumb against his clenching hole.
Jimmy groaned and threw his head back, lifting his hips against Elliot’s body. Elliot’s mouth slid along the line of Jimmy’s jaw and to his neck, where he bit and sucked at the warm skin as he pushed his thumb inside Jimmy and worked it in and out. When the muscle didn’t clench so hard, he changed to his index finger and went deeper, all the while moving his mouth and tasting. Jimmy turned his head with a little whimper and pressed his lips to the side of Elliot’s mouth. Elliot growled and kissed Jimmy harder as he pushed in two fingers and twisted them, shoving them in and out to make room for his aching cock. Ripping his mouth away he reared back and grabbed for the condom, staring at Jimmy the whole time. Jimmy looked back up at him with hooded eyes, breathing heavily and shifting his hips impatiently. Grunting as he rolled on the condom, Elliot shifted closer, lifting one of Jimmy’s legs up to his shoulder and hooking the other over his forearm as he lined up and started in slowly – unable to resist, he had to watch his cock slide into Jimmy, and Elliot shuddered. “God,” he muttered. “Fuck,” Jimmy ground out slowly. “God, yes!” he gasped. Elliot echoed Jimmy as he kept pushing in to the root, and then he let out a gust of air. “Yeah?” he rasped, checking before he started moving, despite how strong the urge was to snap his hips. “Yes,” Jimmy hissed as he dragged his fingertips along the skin of Elliot’s ribs. Gulping for air and grasping for control, Elliot shifted slightly, pulling back and pushing in just a little, over and over as his eyes fluttered shut. “Oh, yeah,” he whispered as he lengthened his stroke a bit each time. Jimmy’s hands flailed, grasping for anything he could reach. He couldn’t move with both his legs held by Elliot’s body, and so he merely held on to him and cried out with each harder thrust. Elliot sped up and used his back and hips to snap forward, then with a rush of air he grunted and started in on a rough, hard rhythm, going as deep as he could get, his groin slapping Jimmy’s ass each time. Jimmy cried out wordlessly and bucked against him, his body clamping down as pleasure ripped through him.
“Touch yourself,” Elliot ordered, his voice deep and dark. “I want to see it. I want to see how you do it.” Jimmy groaned softly and forced his eyes open. He looked up into Elliot’s dark eyes and slowly slid his hand down his body to grasp himself. Elliot’s eyes glittered as he watched, huffing a breath with each stroke into Jimmy’s hot, tight body. Jimmy’s eyes fluttered closed again as he stroked himself, and he groaned loudly and reached for Elliot’s shoulder as he felt himself nearing his orgasm. Elliot was making little sounds of effort with each thrust, his arms starting to clench and shake with the stress of holding himself up as he bored into the other man. “Ya gonna come for me?” he growled. “Come all over yourself as I screw you into the mattress?” He slowed his movements, but changed his angle and slammed as hard as he could into Jimmy, hoping he’d hit the right spot to rocket Jimmy into a stunning reaction. Jimmy’s hand dragged down Elliot’s chest desperately and he arched his back. His other hand continued to move and suddenly his entire body was spasming and clenching. He shouted Elliot’s name as his body twisted, and he emptied himself against Elliot’s stomach. Elliot’s eyes squeezed shut as he thrust into Jimmy’s ass as it clamped around him, and he moaned loudly as he started jerking, each moan punctuated by a burst of come into the condom until he gasped and sagged, trying not to collapse. Jimmy’s hands wound around him and pulled him closer as they both panted. He ran his cheek along the side of Elliot’s face and closed his eyes with a groan. With a grunt of effort, Elliot lowered Jimmy’s legs down so he could settle atop him, and he dropped his forehead to Jimmy’s shoulder as he panted, his cock still twitching inside him. “Are you happy now?” Jimmy asked with something like amusement. Elliot grinned against Jimmy’s skin and lifted his head to look at him, lips curving into a smile. “Yeah,” he admitted. Jimmy shifted slightly, jerking with the last little bit of friction as he moved. He closed his eyes and sighed heavily. “Good to know,” he drawled.
Chuckling a little, Elliot moved and hissed as the sensation zipped through him. Groaning softly, he pushed himself up onto his forearms and crawled backwards to pull out, then reached to hold the condom on as he climbed off the bed. “Wow. What a ride,” he said, running his eyes over Jimmy, an echo of desire still in his eyes. Jimmy laughed, the sound a hoarse echo of his usual, boyish laugh. “Yes, I know,” he said as he floundered on the soft bed. He opened his eyes and looked up at Elliot, grinning mischievously. “You ride well.” Elliot snorted and padded off to the bathroom, disappearing inside the palatial, marble-tiled room where the light flipped on. Jimmy watched the ceiling as he listened to Elliot clean up. A hint of regret began to assail him, but he wasn’t exactly sure why. He frowned and rubbed his forehead distractedly. Just because he had thought, more than once, that it wasn’t fair to be able to run into Elliot Cochran randomly but not Millis, didn’t mean that he should be feeling guilty. Right? Standing at the sink with the water running, Elliot peered into the mirror at himself, trying to figure out why he felt uneasy after such a great, no-strings-attached lay. He laid his forehead against the cool glass and wished he could call McLean. Two heartbeats later he slowly drew back to look at himself again. Why be upset about this? It’s not like McLean would care. They were just friends. Well, he might disapprove of the whole man-on-man action, maybe… but not action in general. Heck, McLean had practically insisted he get some once. They were just friends, right? Elliot frowned. Jimmy rolled out of bed to dispel any lingering thoughts of guilt. “You want room service?” he called as he paced slowly at the end of the bed. Elliot glanced into the mirror to look toward the door and sighed. He’d think about it later. “Yeah, something to drink, especially.” He got rid of the condom and washed up quickly before shutting off the water and walking to the door. “You need to drink something, too.” “Huh?” Jimmy asked flatly as he moved toward the bathroom and slid past Elliot to grab a cloth.
“You need to drink something. Get hydrated?” Elliot said. Jimmy turned and looked at him blankly as he wiped the damp cloth down the hard muscles of his chest and stomach. “You just sweated all over the bed and shot a load. You’re gonna need liquids if you wanna do it again,” Elliot pointed out. “Besides, you were dehydrated before we started.” Jimmy merely laughed and shook his head. acknowledged obediently.
“Yes, sir,” he
“That’s right,” Elliot retorted as he walked over to grope Jimmy. “Now snap to it.” Instead of filling up one of the glasses that sat on the sink counter, Jimmy turned and grabbed Elliot by the back of the neck and kissed him soundly. Elliot practically purred. He closed both hands over Jimmy’s ass and pulled him close, rubbing them together. Jimmy began to laugh softly into the kiss, and he pulled back with a snort. “Man, you really have been on the road alone for too long,” he observed. Elliot huffed but didn’t let go. Jimmy ran his lips over Elliot’s one last time and then extricated himself from Elliot’s arms. “Make you a deal,” he murmured. “I’m going to go call my girls, and you order room service. Then you can fuck me again after we eat.” Elliot blinked, but didn’t comment on the “girls.” Although he did wonder. “Sure,” he said. But he stole another kiss first. Jimmy grinned against his lips and then moved away. He tossed the cloth onto the floor and went to search for his clothes. He pulled on his jeans and his shirt, then stepped out onto the balcony to make the calls, just like he did every week. After watching him go, Elliot decided Jimmy must have daughters. He stepped back into his jeans, though he left them unbuttoned, and poked around on the table for a menu. “Geez,” he muttered as he looked at the big selection. He settled on some simpler stuff and made the call. When Jimmy finished his call to his nieces, he stood with the phone in his hand, looking down at it and debating how much of an asshole it would make him if he called Millis with Elliot sitting inside. He finally decided against it. He enjoyed Elliot’s company too much to spend much of their little time together away from him. He slid the phone into
his pocket with a hint of regret and moved back inside. Elliot was sitting in one of the overstuffed armchairs with his feet up on the low table, paging through a city magazine. “Anything interesting?” Jimmy asked with a hint of guilt to his voice. He had spent longer coaxing the girls to put their daddy back on the phone than he usually had to. Elliot glanced up, surprised Jimmy was already done. “Not other than the baseball stadium down the street,” he said. “Coming up on the post-season.” He tossed the magazine on the table, stood up, and stretched. “Food should be here in fifteen minutes or so.” “Good,” Jimmy practically growled as he looked around the room. “I’m starving,” he muttered as he went to the table beside the bed and picked up the movie guide. Resisting the urge to go grope Jimmy again, Elliot paced around to the balcony window and looked out. “So what were you going to do before you invited me along?” “Sleep,” Jimmy answered shamelessly. “Abuse the jets. Sleep. Eat. Watch movies I haven’t seen yet. Sleep.” Elliot nodded. “Sounds pretty good, actually.” He yawned and blinked a few times before setting his forehead against the glass. He was more tired than he thought. Jimmy glanced over at him and smiled slightly. “After we eat,” he said in a low voice, “do you want the left or the right side?” “I tend to sprawl,” Elliot said dryly, crossing his arms and looking up and down himself. “You get the right, then,” Jimmy huffed. A smirk played across his lips as he added, “My right side is stronger.” Elliot snorted. “Gonna hold me off?” “Something like that,” Jimmy assured him softly. The change in Jimmy’s voice got Elliot’s attention, and he cocked his head questioningly. Jimmy rolled his eyes and laughed. “You take everything way too seriously,” he chastised.
Elliot frowned. “What?” he whined plaintively. “Never mind,” Jimmy huffed. “I’m over it,” he muttered of the joke as he flopped the movie guide down. “There’s not shit on to watch,” he grumbled as he moved closer to Elliot slowly. “Thought you wanted to watch the insides of your eyelids,” Elliot pointed out cheekily with a ghost of a smile. Jimmy smiled and ran his finger down the side of Elliot’s face. “Indeed,” he drawled playfully. “Right after I’m fed and watered,” he added wryly as he moved past Elliot to retrieve a bottle of water from his bag. Elliot raised one hand to touch where Jimmy had touched, not really thinking about it as he watched Jimmy move. “Am I really too serious?” he asked, a frown creasing his forehead. Jimmy straightened back up and turned to look at Elliot. He cocked his head sympathetically. “Maybe a little,” he answered honestly with a wince. “Life’s not all that hard, you know? You take the good with the bad and you try to find what’s funny in both. If not, you go a little loco, you know?” “Well, sure,” Elliot said with a shrug. “I guess I just don’t have that much of a sense of humor.” Jimmy cocked his head sadly. He couldn’t imagine going through life and not being amused by it. The thought reminded him of Millis again and he winced. Elliot looked up at him and frowned deeper, a little hurt by the look on Jimmy’s face. “I’m not so bad,” he protested weakly. “I came with, didn’t I?” Jimmy’s lips twitched again and he nodded. “How about this,” he proposed slowly as he moved closer, as if he was about to strike a deal with the devil. “Since I’m picking up the tab,” he said slyly, “you have to do something for me.” “Sure,” Elliot said, waiting. making me a little nervous.”
“Although that voice of yours is
“It should,” Jimmy assured him with a grin. “You have to try to forget about all the things that bother you,” he went on. “Be happy. Hell,
I’ll feed you, fuck you, let you abuse the jets, too,” he laughed. “No reason you shouldn’t be happy, for a couple days, anyway.” Elliot swallowed hard as his dick stiffened in his jeans. Dang, that sounded like a deal. He held out his hand. “You’re on,” he said. Jimmy took his hand and shook it firmly, grinning in a way that made his blue eyes sparkle and glint. The knock on the door behind him announced that room service was there, but Jimmy neither turned nor let go of Elliot’s hand for a long moment. And Elliot took advantage, pulling hard so Jimmy thumped against his body. Elliot curled his arms around him and kissed him thoroughly before stepping back. “Now feed me,” he drawled. Jimmy was already laughing when their lips met, and he continued to do so after Elliot let him go. “You got it,” he snickered as he turned and opened the door. The rolling cart that trundled in carried several covered plates and bowls, as well as an iced bucket of canned drinks. The server smiled and wished them a good dinner, disappearing without another word. Jimmy gestured for Elliot to dig in, and he began lifting food covers and licking his lips as the smells reached him. He glanced up at Elliot, feeling that pang of guilt again. It was something he didn’t understand, and something he didn’t want to analyze. Not until his several days off were over. Elliot glanced up and frowned. “What’s wrong? Something you don’t like?” “I like everything I see,” Jimmy assured him with a quick smile. A slow smile formed on Elliot’s face. “Good,” he said quietly.
THE first thing Elliot noticed when he woke up was that he was lying in the most heavenly bed he’d ever been in. That was followed quickly by the fact that he laid against something warm and solid. No – correction – someone warm and solid. He pulled his eyes open and shifted on the bed he sprawled across, and when he lifted his chin, Elliot saw Jimmy curled up right against him, sleeping peacefully. Nice sight to wake up to, that was for sure.
Jimmy groaned and mumbled something, moving fitfully before he tossed his arm and leg over Elliot’s body and settled back down. Elliot almost laughed, but bit his lip at the last second, and instead shifted slowly so he could pull Jimmy into his arms and press their bodies together. Jimmy moved restlessly again and muttered in his sleep, pushing against Elliot’s chest and then snuggling up to it contentedly. Elliot felt odd, holding him close. Odd, because it felt so good. He let his eyes close and dropped his chin to nuzzle Jimmy’s temple. He was content to cuddle for now. It wasn’t long after that Jimmy began to stir in earnest, and he huffed and stretched as he woke, pushing against Elliot’s body as he did so. Elliot chuckled as Jimmy shifted and pressed him away, trying to get more room. Elliot immediately missed the warmth when he slid back. “Morning,” Jimmy groaned plaintively. Elliot almost laughed again. “Morning,” he said. “Shut up,” Jimmy grouched as he rolled onto his back and stretched again until his entire body shook. Elliot did laugh then, a low, dark sound. “Good morning,” he drawled out, reaching to drag one palm over Jimmy’s belly and chest. Jimmy growled, the sound something similar to a kitten purring when his tummy was rubbed. He continued to stretch languidly and then finally cracked his eyes open and blinked sleepily at the ceiling. Elliot enjoyed the view and kept rubbing, although he slowed to more of a caress when Jimmy relaxed. “Sleep okay?” Jimmy groaned in answer and smiled. contentedly. “You?”
“Oh, yeah,” he said
Humming an affirmative, Elliot propped his head up on one hand after rolling to his side. “I’m afraid I’ll be awake for awhile now,” he said apologetically. “Jackass,” Jimmy muttered as he closed his eyes again. Elliot leaned over and kissed the corner of his mouth. Jimmy hummed and his lips twitched into a smile. “So, what would you like to do today, my ornery friend?” “Mmmm. Get out and walk,” Elliot said quietly. “If I don’t, I’ll hurt all over. Too used to hard labor.”
“I can give you hard labor,” Jimmy quipped, his voice still hoarse from sleep and his eyes still closed. “Do tell,” Elliot said, his rubbing hand roving lower on Jimmy’s body. Jimmy flailed slightly and laughed, smacking Elliot’s hand away and then huffing. “Tickles,” he snickered with a blush. Elliot laughed and darted his hand back over to wiggle across Jimmy’s ribs, looking for vulnerable spots. “Stop it!” Jimmy shouted as he curled up protectively and rolled away from Elliot. Grinning, Elliot did stop, pulling back and trying not to laugh. “See, you’re smiling,” Jimmy observed, even though he was turned away. “It’s a start,” he mused. Elliot snorted and shook his head, but he was still smiling. “Yeah,” he said softly in a moment of seriousness. “Thanks.” “My fucking pleasure,” Jimmy grunted, trying to be grumpy but failing with a smile as he glanced back over his shoulder. “I have to take a leak,” he added as he rolled out from under the covers. “You can do my pleasure anytime you want,” Elliot said agreeably. “Shut up,” Jimmy grumbled with a barely concealed smirk as he shuffled to the bathroom. Elliot collapsed onto his back with a sigh, one hand coasting under the sheet to stroke himself idly. The bed was so comfortable, he found himself contemplating going back to sleep for awhile – a very, very rare occurrence indeed. “Stop it,” Jimmy called from the bathroom. “Wait for me, damn you.” Elliot blinked and craned his neck up. There was no way Jimmy could see him. And it wasn’t like he was actively doing anything. He humphed and kept fondling gently. A few more moments later, Jimmy came strolling back into the bedroom, hair mussed and eyes still soft and sleepy. He cocked his head and watched Elliot contemplatively. Looking up as Jimmy walked back to the bed, Elliot just gazed at him, taking in the handsome lines of his body and feeling his own body react positively under his hand. He didn’t feel the need to say anything –
he was still surprised by how comfortable he felt around Jimmy, who was really just a stranger still. Jimmy cocked his head to the other side and observed him for a long moment. “I want to go back to bed,” he finally huffed in something like a sulk. Elliot slid his other hand behind his head. “So come back to bed,” he said. “I was just thinking this bed was so comfortable that I might sleep some more.” But his hand kept moving slowly. Jimmy narrowed his eyes and let them travel down Elliot’s body pointedly. Elliot sighed and pulled his hand out from under the sheet, rolled, and got out of the bed. “My turn in the bathroom,” he said. Jimmy was silent, blatantly watching him as he walked and smirking. Elliot saw that amusement and rolled his eyes as he brushed past Jimmy to go toward the bathroom. “Tease,” Jimmy called after him softly. In a moment of whimsy, Elliot blew him a kiss as he disappeared into the bathroom. Jimmy laughed heartily, the sound young and gleeful. Shaking his head, Elliot looked at himself in the mirror and sighed. He was grinning like a loon. He took care of business, used a courtesy brush to clean his mouth out, and walked back to the door. “So, what do you want to do?” Jimmy asked him as he sat on the end of the bed. “This is your weekend,” Elliot said, leaning against the door frame. “I’m just along for the ride.” His lips twitched. “Rides,” Jimmy corrected lasciviously. “Rides,” Elliot agreed. “I figure your butt is ready for a break, though.” “Granted,” Jimmy answered with a nod. “Ever seen the Arch?” he asked suddenly. “Seen,” Elliot said. “From the Interstate. Kind of hard to miss,” he said drolly. “I mean up close,” Jimmy huffed. “I’ve never seen it. We’re in walking distance, I think.”
“Sounds good to me. Walk, food, fresh air, and not even too hot out, I think,” Elliot said. Jimmy looked up at him and smiled. It sounded like a pleasant day. And he certainly didn’t mind the company. “Get your ass dressed, then,” he ordered with a grin. Elliot nodded and went to dig in the duffel he’d brought along, pulling on briefs before setting out jeans, socks and a T-shirt. “Wanna get something to eat before we go?” “In or out?” Jimmy asked as he began to rifle through his own clothing. “I’ll buy if it’s out,” Elliot said, standing and pulling up his jeans, wriggling into them. “Sounds like a deal to me,” Jimmy crooned happily as he got dressed haphazardly. Elliot sighed. Looked like the good mood was back. And dang if it wasn’t catching.
JIMMY lay sprawled on the sofa in their mini-suite, his head in Elliot’s lap as he tried to concentrate on paying attention to the movie rather than letting his thoughts wander. Elliot relaxed against the overstuffed arm, the fingers of one hand idly sliding through Jimmy’s hair as he watched the end of the movie. Sort of. He was more focused on the man so close, the warm weight of him. They’d spent two days hanging out, relaxing, sleeping, being casually touristy, and screwing late into the nights until they fell asleep in each other’s arms. He was okay when they were actively doing something, but in the quiet times, like when they settled down in front of the television, he couldn’t keep his mind from straying to how… great… it had been. Jimmy’s distracted thoughts ran along remarkably similar lines. He frowned as he stared at the television, thinking about just how much he had enjoyed this time with Elliot and wondering why the entire couple of days had been tainted with the same guilt he was battling now. He kept thinking about Millis. There was no reason to. He was a friend, and a good one. But the man had never given any hint that he might even be gay, much less interested in Jimmy. Jimmy had never even met him, and
he wasn’t sure he ever would, despite their most recent discussion in which they spent an entire night planning their retirement together. Hell, he didn’t even know the man’s real name. Why was he ruining a good, temporary thing – a fling, really – with guilt over a relationship that he would probably never have? The movie ended, and Elliot shifted just a little, sliding his hand deeper into Jimmy’s hair. “You want to watch something else?” he asked quietly. He’d taken to thinking he ought to give McLean a call. Elliot thought he might be getting just a little too attached to Jimmy, and it was bothering him. He wanted to talk to his friend. His best friend. “Not really,” Jimmy huffed. “I don’t remember much of that one,” he admitted. Elliot frowned down at him. “Did I put you to sleep?” He stilled his fingers. “Maybe,” Jimmy murmured with a slight blush. He would rather fib than admit how distracted he was. “Sorry. You could take a nap,” Elliot said. They’d spent just as much time sleeping as anything else, but Elliot remembered how tired Jimmy had looked – and how tired he’d been himself. Jimmy slowly pushed up to sit beside Elliot, rubbing his face where the creases of Elliot’s jeans had reddened his cheek. “Don’t really feel like sleeping,” he admitted sheepishly. He glanced sideways at Elliot. He didn’t like feeling guilty for enjoying their proximity. Elliot felt struck by something as he looked at Jimmy, something soft and warm that curled inside him. “Feel like anything in particular?” he asked huskily. “Not that,” Jimmy laughed softly. “Not yet, anyway,” he corrected as he reached out and took Elliot’s hand to kiss it gently. Elliot’s face softened as he watched, and when Jimmy’s lips lifted away, Elliot slowly turned his hand sideways and lifted it to cup Jimmy’s cheek. He sighed soundlessly as he tried to let go of a growing possessiveness. He had no claim on Jimmy Vaughn, and never would. The man was about the freest spirit he had ever encountered. “So what’s on your mind?” “Nothing,” Jimmy answered with a slight grin.
Elliot snorted and shook his head. “How about a snack?” he asked. Maybe getting out and walking around would help dispel these weird feelings. “Only if you’ll go get it,” Jimmy countered wryly. He leaned away from Elliot and sprawled back on the sofa, placing his bare feet in Elliot’s lap. “I suppose I can do that,” Elliot said, closing his hands around one long-toed foot and squeezing. “I’m thinking some fudge from that shop in the lobby.” “Oooh,” Jimmy cooed. “Give me chocolate and I’ll be yours,” he sighed happily. Elliot dug his thumb into the bottom of Jimmy’s foot, rubbing in a circle. “You’re so easy,” he accused playfully. Jimmy’s toes began to curl and he cleared his throat. The guilt assailed him again and he slid his feet off Elliot’s lap to give him a little kick. “Go get me chocolate.” Pushing himself off the couch, Elliot shoved his feet into his shoes and grabbed his wallet and cell phone off the desk. “I’ll be back,” he said, sliding the keycard off the dresser and into his hand as he walked by. He stopped at the door to look at Jimmy, thinking he’d say something, but instead he just looked for a moment before heading out the door. Jimmy reclined on the couch, watching the door for a moment. His frown deepened as he thought about Elliot and about Millis. He glanced over at the bedside table, where his phone sat. He hadn’t heard from Millis in a few days. And he hadn’t tried to call, either. Maybe that was why he felt so off, because he hadn’t spoken to the man. He didn’t know when it had happened, but Millis had somehow become his best friend, confidant and just all around favorite person, even though they’d never actually met. He got up impulsively and went for his phone. He had to talk to Millis before Elliot came back. He feared what he might say to Elliot – or do to him – if he didn’t have someone to put his head on straight. He dialed and paced restlessly.
DOWN in the lobby, looking at the selection of about a million kinds of fudge, Elliot was trying to narrow his choices down. Plain milk chocolate. Plain dark chocolate. Chocolate and peanut butter. Chocolate with pecans. Rocky Road. Cookies and cream. Chocolate and cherry. “Well, dang,” he muttered. “How am I supposed to choose?” The woman behind the counter took pity on him and offered to make up a box with a few pieces of several kinds, and Elliot perked up and started pointing. He was surprised when his phone vibrated on his hip. “Yeah?” he asked distractedly. “Hey, Millis,” the soft voice on the other end greeted. “McLean, hey,” Elliot said, smiling as he looked into the glass cabinet at the candy. “How are you? It’s been a few days.” “Yeah,” McLean said regretfully, his voice softer and more troubled than usual. Elliot frowned. McLean was definitely not himself. He was never this quiet. “You okay, man?” There was silence on the other end. It was obvious that McLean was outside somewhere, not in his rig driving. Finally, he exhaled loudly. “You ever do something you had too much fun doing to regret?” he asked seriously. “But you know you should?” Elliot stood up straight, looking at the back of the candy store but not seeing it. He thought about the little twinges of conscience he’d been pushing away every time he thought of McLean, and one of those twinges hit him with a vengeance. “Yeah. Yeah, I have.” McLean was silent once more, obviously trying to form his next words. “You’re a good friend, Millis,” he finally murmured. “I think you ought to know that.” Elliot really frowned, and he started pacing back and forth in the store. “What’s up, man? I’ve never heard you this down.” McLean finally chuckled a little. “This ain’t down, friend. This is guilt.” “Guilt? Guilt over what? What’ja do, steal a candy bar?” There was another moment of silence where McLean was merely inhaling deeply and then blowing air out again. He might have been
smoking, but it was hard to tell. “Done something I don’t tend to do,” he finally admitted. “Couple a times,” he added wryly. “Can’t seem to get it into my head not to feel bad about it.” Elliot frowned, walking toward the back of the store away from some other customers. Thinking about Jimmy upstairs, he was quiet for a long moment before he sighed. “Bet I can guess,” he mumbled. “Oh, yeah?” McLean laughed softly, obviously distracted. Elliot blinked a few times, again struck by how “off” McLean was sounding. “Ate chicken nuggets?” he threw out there on purpose. “I told you,” McLean insisted slowly, “don’t say those words. It’s traumatizing.” Despite the attempt at a joke, McLean still didn’t sound right. Elliot sighed and realized that he felt the way McLean did – guilty, and for no reason he could really explain. Except he didn’t want to tell McLean what he’d been doing the last couple days, that he knew for sure. When Elliot spoke, his voice was low and unusually warm. “If you need to talk, I’m here for you.” After a moment of silence, McLean sighed and gave a weak laugh. “Thanks, man,” he responded in a low voice. “You know….” He hesitated, as if not certain he should be saying what he obviously wanted to say. “I think maybe you might be the only good thing I got that don’t feel wrong somehow,” he admitted quickly. “You’re a good thing, Millis.” Elliot didn’t know what to say at first, and it took a bit to really formulate anything coherent, because it became totally clear to him at that moment that he felt the same way about McLean. The warmth of it rivaled what had been growing for Jimmy inside him – only this was McLean, his best friend in the whole world. “I’m… well, okay, if you say so,” he said softly. McLean blew out another lungful of what was obviously smoke. “Well. I better go. Before the something I don’t tend to do comes back,” he said wryly. Elliot slowly smiled. He’d smiled more while talking to McLean these past several months than he had in his whole life. “I see. Well.
Since you’re already feeling guilty, you better enjoy that something you don’t tend to do all you can before it’s gone.” McLean laughed weakly, sounding oddly disappointed with Elliot’s approval. “You have a good night, Millis.” “You, too.” Elliot closed his cell phone and looked down at it. If anything, McLean had sounded more unhappy by the end of the call. Elliot thought about calling him back, but decided he’d wait until tomorrow night. Maybe that thing he didn’t tend to do would be gone, and his McLean would be back. For now, he had Jimmy to hold and enjoy. Turning back around, Elliot shoved his cell phone in the back pocket of his jeans, got the box of fudge, and went upstairs. Went upstairs to Jimmy. “I’m back,” he said needlessly when he walked into the hotel room, but he felt the urge to announce himself. Jimmy stuck his head back into the room, holding his cigarette away from the door. “You have chocolate?” he asked suspiciously. Elliot held up the box, shaking it gently, before putting it on the desk and emptying his pockets. Jimmy remained out on the balcony, smoking and watching Elliot thoughtfully. Elliot nabbed a piece of rich plain milk chocolate and walked over to the balcony door, waving it teasingly. Jimmy’s eyes narrowed and he turned his head slightly to blow smoke away from where Elliot stood. He grinned slowly and tossed the cigarette down to stamp it out. “Tease,” he accused as he twisted his bare heel over the butt. Blinking at Jimmy putting out the cigarette, he winced. “Here,” he said in pained response. “You probably need this.” He held out the chocolate. “Didn’t that hurt?” “What?” Jimmy asked as he stepped forward and took the chocolate. He bit his lower lip and grinned as he looked at the square of fudge. “Putting out that cigarette,” Elliot said with a frown. Jimmy looked down at the butt and then back up at Elliot as if he wasn’t quite sure what Elliot was talking about. He lifted his foot and
showed it to Elliot with a smile. “Like leather,” he laughed. “You okay?” he asked as his brow furrowed. “Yeah,” Elliot murmured, reaching to pinch off a corner of the piece of fudge. “You sure?” Jimmy asked him as he reached out and snagged Elliot’s wrist so he couldn’t actually eat the piece of fudge he’d pilfered. Elliot frowned a little and looked at Jimmy’s hand before looking back to blue eyes. “Yeah. Why?” He felt like he was flailing a little – he didn’t know what to say. Jimmy surveyed him critically, then brought Elliot’s hand up to his mouth and licked the chocolate off Elliot’s fingers. He let Elliot’s hand go and licked his lips, grinning. “You look like someone needs to fuck you through a wall,” he observed finally. Both Elliot’s brows rose and he looked over Jimmy. “You interested in screwing somebody through a wall to the point of exhaustion?” he asked, stepping forward to push Jimmy up against the wall of the side of the balcony. Jimmy held the block of fudge up and out protectively as he looked at Elliot thoughtfully. “One more ride before it’s back to the real world?” he asked a little sadly. “Guess so,” Elliot said quietly. “I could go ahead and head out, let you have tonight to yourself. You’ve been more than generous.” “No,” Jimmy murmured with a shake of his head. “Stay,” he requested. “I’ve enjoyed having you here,” he said, though the furrow in his brow appeared again as he rested his head back against the wall. Elliot peered at him, trying to place why this all of a sudden seemed so odd and awkward. He was missing something. “Okay,” he agreed. “Don’t have to go to bed,” he said. “We can just relax.” Jimmy shook his head and smiled slowly. “We have a king-sized bed and a box full of fudge,” he said slyly. “I think we should enjoy them.” A slow smile grew on Elliot’s face, and he leaned forward slowly to kiss Jimmy lightly before standing back. “So what’s holding you up?”
Jimmy inclined his head and met Elliot’s eyes. “Nothing,” he answered with a hint of surprise. Elliot reached out to start unbuttoning Jimmy’s shirt. “I know what we’ve got planned for the bed. Anything special you want to do with the fudge?” He licked his bottom lip and glanced to the piece that was slowly getting gooey between Jimmy’s fingers. Jimmy glanced at the block of fudge in his hand and then back at Elliot with a quirk of his eyebrow. “You’re a kinky bastard,” he laughed. “I’m going to fucking eat it,” he growled as he used his free hand to pull Elliot to him. “Then I’ll get to work on you,” he promised in a low voice. Grabbing Jimmy’s wrist, Elliot raised Jimmy’s hand to his mouth so he could bite off the end of the piece, licking Jimmy’s thumb afterward. “Mmmmm,” he purred. Jimmy’s eyes fluttered closed and he growled softly. “Move your ass,” he nearly snarled. Elliot pushed his body up against Jimmy’s. drawled.
“Already?” he
Jimmy smiled and then quickly hid it as he pulled himself closer to Elliot. He put his lips to Elliot’s and nipped at him gently. “Get in the fucking bed,” he whispered against Elliot’s lips. A soft rumble from deep in Elliot’s chest signaled his agreement, and he kissed Jimmy, fast and hard, before abruptly moving back into the hotel room, where he kicked off his shoes and sat down on the foot of the bed, unbuttoning his shirt. He had no idea what had gotten into him – but he hoped Jimmy would, too. And fast.
THE sun was just beginning to set when Jimmy awoke. He lay in his bunk, staring aimlessly as he let himself wake. Almost two weeks later, and he was still thinking of Elliot Cochran. He closed his eyes and groaned slightly, hating that the guilt had won out after all to cloud his memories of what had been a damn good time. He rolled out of the bed noisily and stretched, groaning and huffing all the while. He got dressed half-heartedly, threw his battered cowboy hat on top of his unruly hair, and he stepped down out of the rig to go in search of breakfast.
He walked with his head down, frowning heavily. He felt like he had betrayed Millis, even though it was irrational to think that way. Millis had never even given him a hint as to whether he might be partial to men, and Jimmy was sure that any attraction he might be feeling – and he was definitely feeling some – wasn’t reciprocated. He thought about Elliot Cochran and winced as guilt and desire coursed through him yet again. He had rarely found himself quite so attracted to someone else, physically. In fact, the only thing he could think of that rivaled the feeling was the way it felt to see Millis’s number on his phone’s display screen. Either way, he was fucked. Being with Elliot, he had been thinking of Millis and wishing he could touch the man who belonged to the voice he loved. But for the past two weeks, he had been seeing Elliot when he closed his eyes and trying to convince himself that calling out Elliot’s name when he touched himself wasn’t something to feel guilty about. He did, though. He felt so goddamned guilty. Even as he thought about the two men, the phone attached to his belt began to belt out ‘Take This Job and Shove It,’ and Jimmy reached for it before it could disturb anyone around him. He saw the familiar name on the readout and smiled as he flipped it open. “Howdy,” he greeted sedately, pushing back the new wave of guilt as he did so. The first thing he heard was a couple loud clanks and a muffled oath. Then a louder clank. “Goddang stupid piece of crap!” Jimmy frowned and then laughed slightly. Millis couldn’t curse for shit. In fact, Jimmy had never heard him curse. He obviously didn’t realize he had dialed. “Hey!” he shouted into the phone. The clanking stopped and there was a muffled, fumbling sound. “Hello?” was the cautious reply. Jimmy laughed again. “You sound like you’re having problems, Millis,” he greeted. “McLean? Crap, man, I’m sorry. I must have hit the button by accident.” The clanking started up again, though quieter, and Millis grunted. “Ever had one of those days when you figured you should have stayed in bed?”
Jimmy was silent a moment, pondering. “Nope,” he finally answered with a grin. “I’m a fucking sunflower. I’m hurt, though. Didn’t mean to call me, got me all excited for nothing,” he sulked. “Pfffft. Believe me, you don’t want to be here. I’m dying out in this sun,” Millis muttered crossly. “And you’re too dang happy. I’m trying to be pissed here.” “Sun,” Jimmy responded with a huff. “Where are you, out West? Hey, I’m always happy. Takes too much energy to be pissy. Bet that’s why you’re always tired,” he teased. “I’m in Dallas, trying to fix this goddang stupid piece of crap excuse for a forklift.” More clanking. Jimmy burst out laughing, the same good-natured, boyish sound as always. “Well hell, Millis, you’re only an hour behind me! Sweltering in the sun,” he chuckled. It was just coming up on dusk. “Fat lot of good it does me. I’ve got to fix this dang thing or I’m sitting on my butt ’til tomorrow. Stupid warehouse dickheads. Don’t know how to keep up their own stupid crappy equipment,” Millis complained. “Have you tried kicking it?” Jimmy suggested with complete sincerity. “Repair method number one,” Millis said, his voice darkly sarcastic. Jimmy sighed. “What make is it?” he asked seriously. “It’s a Clark cushion tire.” Jimmy could hear the sound of a ratchet turning. “Okay, here’s what you do,” he started in, proceeding to give Millis step-by-step instructions of the most likely way to get the thing working again. “It won’t be permanent, but it might get you through the load,” he cautioned. There was clinking and clanking and ratcheting and other sounds before some clicking, and the engine spluttered to life. “God, I love you,” Millis said fervently. Jimmy gave that a melancholy smile and laughed weakly. “No, you don’t,” he joked. “You’re just here for the sex.”
There was quiet for a moment on the other end of the connection, and Jimmy held his breath, fearing he had taken the joke too far. “How’d you figure me out?” Millis finally asked wryly over the whir and whiz of the forklift. Jimmy huffed slightly. “You’re all the same,” he teased. “Hey, I gotta take a leak, can I call you back?” “Sure,” Millis said. “Now that the forklift’s fixed, I get to go sit in my lovely air-conditioned cab while they unload the trailer.” Jimmy laughed quietly and said goodbye, then entered the truck stop building and headed for the bathrooms, then the food. He stocked up on sour cream and onion chips and a few soft drinks, and then headed back out to his truck as he pulled his cell phone out again. He hit the button that would call Millis and stuffed his wallet into his back pocket as it rang. He had noticed, over the last week or so, that whenever he waited for Millis to pick up, his stomach tumbled with nerves. Was it possible to develop a little crush on someone you had never really met? It rang a few times before Millis answered. “Hey.” It was quiet where he was now. “Hey,” Jimmy responded in a soft, affectionate voice. Millis didn’t say anything for a few moments. “You doing better? I meant to call you to check on you, but things got away from me.” His voice was lower, too, devoid of its normal grouchiness. Jimmy took a deep breath and then let it out slowly. “I don’t know,” he finally answered honestly. “Hey, I’m sorry about that,” he added regretfully. “I just needed to talk to someone before I did something stupid.” “The other night or now?” “The other night,” Jimmy answered with a small smile. “With the something you don’t tend to do.” squeaking sound like Millis settling in a seat.
There was a
Jimmy hesitated when he reached his truck, his fingers on the handle and his head down. “Yeah,” he finally answered softly. “I don’t… I don’t pick up women, you see,” he admitted with a wince. He thought he knew that Millis wouldn’t care that he was gay. He hoped so, anyway.
But Jimmy had found that you could never really tell how deep some prejudices were buried. “Well, you said it was something you don’t tend to do,” Millis pointed out. “I meant….” Jimmy laughed softly. “Never mind,” he sighed with a slight smile. He opened up the door with a clunk and hefted himself into the truck. “Okay.” A few moments of silence. “Oh. Oh! Well, dang. Okay.” Jimmy laughed hard, leaning over the steering wheel and gripping it with one hand as he rested his forehead on the horn, laughing until he was gasping for breath. “What are you laughing for?” Millis sounded mystified. “You,” Jimmy gasped. “Me? Why?” Jimmy calmed and shook his head, still smiling. “Sorry,” he offered sincerely. “Your reaction was just… that’s priceless.” Millis snorted. “Just wasn’t what I expected to hear, is all.” There wasn’t any censure in his voice. “Yeah, well, sorry,” Jimmy offered uncomfortably. “No, it’s okay.” Jimmy sat staring over the wheel of the truck at the parking lot. “Yeah?” he finally asked tentatively. “Yeah,” Millis said. Oddly, it sounded like he was smiling. Jimmy smiled and shifted in his seat, leaning back and getting comfortable. “Well. How’s the road treating you?” “Fine, I guess. Tired as always. Can’t find my favorite chips in the stops lately,” Millis said in annoyance. “No?” Jimmy asked with a laugh. “Some potholes can be Grand Canyons when you’re running hard.”
“You ever driven through Arkansas? Now there’s some potholes. You’ll sink an axle if you’re not careful.” There was a rustling and shifting in the background. “Yeah,” Jimmy laughed as he stood and began securing his things for the coming drive. “West Virginia coming up,” he muttered. “Makes my ass tight going over those mountains, man.” Millis snickered. “The jokes I could make have taken on a whole new meaning.” Jimmy gave another genuine, light laugh and he shook his head. “Careful now, I’ll get the wrong idea,” he teased. Millis snickered again. “You say that like it’s a bad thing.” Jimmy straightened and blinked at the back of his cab stupidly. “Isn’t it?” he asked bluntly. Millis’s voice was hesitant this time. “Another reason to leave Wilton, Wisconsin. They don’t exactly approve of someone who’s equal opportunity.” Jimmy was silent, stunned by an admission he had never really considered to be possible. “I guess not,” he replied in shock. There was more squeaking, and Millis didn’t say anything else. “Small world, huh?” Jimmy murmured finally, his voice thoughtful and soft. “Yeah,” Millis said quietly. “Guess so.” There was a pause. “You’re not from Wisconsin, are you?” he asked in more his normal voice. “No,” Jimmy laughed in answer. “Well?” Millis asked meaningfully. Jimmy laughed softly. “Knoxville, Tennessee,” he answered. “Ah, a dyed-in-the-wool Volunteer? Go Orange?” “Damn straight,” Jimmy huffed. Millis actually chuckled. “I felt guilty, you know?” Jimmy told him suddenly. “The other night. Felt like maybe I was cheating on someone. But there’s no one to cheat on.” “Do you want there to be?” It was innocent enough a question.
Jimmy stopped moving again and blinked. “Maybe,” he answered softly. “Yeah.” “You got your eye on someone? Got a possibility at home?” Millis asked seriously. There was a wistful quality to his voice. “No,” Jimmy answered with a small smile. “Home is my rig, the past years.” He bit his lip and looked down at his bed nervously. “But I guess you could say I do have my eye on someone, now that you mention it.” “Yeah? So tell me about him.” “You tell me about him,” Jimmy invited softly. “How would I….” Millis stopped speaking abruptly. “Oh.” That single word was full of meaning. “I enjoy when you’re flummoxed,” Jimmy admitted with a smile. Millis abruptly laughed aloud, his full, booming laugh that was so at odds with his normal, grouchy self. “Great,” he said. “I wouldn’t have chosen that as an attractive quality.” Jimmy sat back down and tilted his hat back slightly. “I enjoy the way you laugh, too,” he told Millis with a grin. “Now that, you’ve said,” Millis said, still laughing. “So what do you want to know?” “I want to know,” Jimmy drawled out as he geared up, “your route for the next week.” “Uh. Hang on a sec.” It was more like a minute before Millis was back. “Texarkana, Little Rock, St. Louis, and back to Kansas City, looks like.” Jimmy reached up to the sun visor and flipped it down, looking up at his own schedule. “Kansas City,” he murmured. “What do you think about meeting up there?” he asked tentatively. “You said there was a nice stop close by.” Millis’s voice was a little shaky when he spoke. “Yeah. Conoco on 70. Good restaurant.” “I’ll be there in a week’s time,” Jimmy told him softly as he sat in his idling rig.
“I’ve thought about you,” Millis admitted. “More than I thought I should.” The words warmed Jimmy’s entire body, and he closed his eyes and smiled in the dim light. “Me, too,” he admitted in a whisper. “I look forward to your calls more than I do my stops.” “Jesus,” Millis said thickly. “I thought it was just me.” “Me, too,” Jimmy responded with a slight laugh. “So, is it a date?” he asked carefully. “Yeah, you’re on.” Jimmy grinned widely and let his rig begin to roll. “I look forward to seeing you, Millis,” he said warmly.
JIMMY kicked the tire in frustration as the dock worker and the manager standing inside his trailer battled it out. He was already behind schedule, and this was making him even more so. Another twenty minutes and he would officially miss his meeting time with Millis, no matter how many speed limits he broke. He yanked his cell phone off his belt and dialed. A few seconds later, Millis answered. “Hey, McLean,” he greeted. Over the past week Millis’s voice had relaxed and even become friendly most of the time. Jimmy smiled slightly and then sighed. “I ain’t gonna make it, man,” he said regretfully. “Break down?” Millis’s voice was concerned. “Nah. These fucking shitwits can’t find my load,” Jimmy growled as he looked back up at the empty trailer. “Even if they started loading it right now, I don’t think I’d make it.” “Calm down, firecracker. Pissing them off won’t help,” Millis said before sighing. “We’ll try again.” “They can’t hear me, they’re too busy trying to fit their heads up their asses,” Jimmy snarled. He sniffed loudly and then lowered his head. “I’m sorry,” he said in a soft, sincere voice. “I was really looking forward to meeting you.”
“We’ll try again,” Millis repeated, his voice warmer this time. “I promise.” Jimmy smiled and nodded, not thinking that Millis couldn’t see him. “Be safe, Millis,” he said fondly. “I will. Try not to commit homicide.” The connection ended with a soft buzz of static. Jimmy closed his eyes and snapped the cell phone shut as the dock workers finally began loading his freight.
“JESUS flippin’ Christ,” Elliot growled as he watched the tow truck take his tractor off across the lot to the maintenance garage just to the side of the Conoco. At least the driver had been willing to drop him here. And the company was sending him another truck, but it wouldn’t be here for at least ten hours. “Goddang four-wheeler,” Elliot cussed as he started walking to the building, duffel over his shoulder. “What a crappy day.” First, he’d hardly slept last night, nervous about meeting McLean today. Then McLean got held up. Then a car decided to drive sideways under his tractor and crunch in the side wheel well so badly that a tire couldn’t be put on the truck without major body work. So that meant hours of sitting on the side of the road, talking to the cops, then calling in the accident to Millis central dispatch and explaining. Luckily, he had a really good record, so the dispatcher didn’t give him crap, which was so far the high point of the day. Now, he wanted a shower, about ten gallons of iced tea, and somewhere to curl up and lick his wounds. And he wanted McLean so much he ached with it.
THE big black McLean rig pulled into the Conoco lot just as the darkness began to creep into the day. Jimmy had pushed it past the limit and managed to make up about an hour of his lost time. He scanned the lot, looking for the red and blue rig that he remembered from the Kansas City pileup, but it was nowhere in sight. Jimmy cursed with feeling and shook his head. He hadn’t really expected Millis to hang around, but he was disappointed, nonetheless.
“Goddamned charger,” Jimmy grumbled to himself as he parked the rig and then glared down at the broken prongs of his phone charger. He would have to buy a new one in the Travel Center and charge his phone up again before he could call Millis. He climbed out to stretch his sore muscles. He had ended up helping to load the truck, and he knew he would be paying for it by morning. He supposed it was a good thing that Millis was gone already. Who would want to see him like this? He trudged into the restaurant and stood, staring stupidly for a moment. Elliot had claimed a table in the restaurant a couple hours ago, after buying a magazine to pass the time. He had half a sandwich sitting in front of him and a carafe of iced tea nearby, and he was still distinctly annoyed. He sighed and shifted in the chair. His butt was sore. Dang chair needed a flippin’ cushion. Jimmy caught sight of him and blinked, then looked around the restaurant as if he might be seeing things. He stood and fought with himself, wondering if he should approach the man. He felt guilty about wanting to, but going over and saying hi to a man he had fucked didn’t mean they would end up fucking again, right? It was common courtesy. Jimmy nodded to himself and started toward Elliot’s table. As he got closer he could see that the man was not happy, and he hesitated. Sniffing in annoyance, Elliot folded over the magazine, bored with it. He tossed it on the table and happened to look up. He tipped his head to one side. “Jimmy Vaughn,” he said, a slight question mark at the end of the man’s name. “Elliot Cochran,” Jimmy responded with a careful smile. Elliot looked over him before gesturing to the chair across from him. “Have a seat, restaurant’s busy,” he said in a disgruntled voice. “Thanks,” Jimmy responded as he took his seat and flopped slightly. He looked around the restaurant briefly before returning his attention to Elliot. There was no point in looking for Millis, he didn’t even know what the man looked like. “You look like you’ve had a long day,” he observed as he looked across the table at Elliot. Letting his head drop back, Elliot groaned and covered his eyes. “I could tell you, but you’d think it was a bad, bad movie,” he muttered. “Started out bad and got worse, the highlight of which was my truck getting hit by a four-wheeler, and I’m stuck with nowhere to go until
another truck gets here.” He growled afterward to make his annoyance clear. Jimmy’s eyebrows climbed in surprise. stuck?” he asked sympathetically.
“How long you been
“What time is it?” Elliot craned his neck to see the clock on the wall. 9:30 p.m. “Four hours, so far. Company said ten for a replacement truck, but I’m thinking it will be well into tomorrow morning.” “Ten hours?” Jimmy asked incredulously. “Jesus,” he muttered as he sat back and looked at Elliot, considering. “You need a bed?” he asked carefully. Elliot slowly turned his head to look at Jimmy. He wondered what to do; just this morning he’d been hoping to… well. He had to sleep somewhere. “Somewhere to sleep, yeah,” he said, his voice tentative, trying to get a point across. Jimmy smiled slightly in relief and nodded. “You’re welcome to share mine,” he offered. “I’m here for the night.” Elliot relaxed. “Great.” He looked Jimmy up and down. “You look like you need a shower.” Jimmy shifted uncomfortably. “Been a long day.” Clearing his throat, Elliot raised an ill-tempered eyebrow. “Shut up,” Jimmy huffed. He dug in his pocket and extracted his keys, then tossed them onto the table. “It’s in the back,” he told Elliot with a slight smile as he stood. “Thanks,” Elliot said genuinely. “These chairs are breaking my back.” He stood up and stretched. “What truck am I looking for? I didn’t think to look last time.” “Big black International rig,” Jimmy answered as he stepped away from the table. “Red diamond on the side,” he told Elliot as he headed for the showers. Elliot stood up, grabbed the check, his duffel, and the keys. He paid the bill and walked on out to the lot. He headed across the gravel, looking down the rows of rigs and finally found a ‘big black one’ with a red diamond. He crunched across to it, swinging the keys, and stopped next to the passenger door before he looked up.
And saw the word McLean. He blinked and checked again. McLean. “Huh.” Elliot shook it off. “Lots of McLean trucks around, I guess.” He looked up and down the trailer; it was a general purpose box with several warning brackets, but no mounted diamonds. McLean hauled hazardous materials; if this was the truck he drove then it would have diamonds. Shrugging, he unlocked the rig and climbed in, dropped his duffel on the floor, and sat down to wait after kicking off his crosstrainers. It wasn’t long before Jimmy arrived, stomping up the steps and yanking the door open. He was wearing the same clothes he had been before, but his hair was wet and he immediately began stripping off his shirt and digging through his duffel for a new one. “Didn’t realize the bed came with a free show.” Jimmy glanced over at him and blushed as he worked on his belt. He couldn’t help but be reminded of the quite incredible sex they had shared just weeks ago, and he wondered if it had been such a good idea to make the offer. Despite his every intention of tracking down Millis and trying to have something with him, he knew if Elliot made even the slightest suggestion, he would cave. Jimmy didn’t have all that much selfcontrol. Elliot was on the bed, leaning into the back corner, legs crossed. “Forgot, huh?” His lips twitched. Elliot couldn’t tear his eyes away. He thought more and more about McLean the past few days, getting more and more worked up over him despite telling himself he shouldn’t. And having Jimmy this close did nothing for his willpower. He remembered the weekend they’d had and curled his hands into the blanket to keep them to himself. “Little bit,” Jimmy laughed as he shucked his jeans and tossed them onto the floor. “You don’t want the free show, close your eyes,” he teased before he pushed his briefs down and grabbed for a new pair. Elliot groaned and closed his eyes. “This isn’t why I came here, honest,” he said. He could feel his cock throbbing in his jeans and made himself think of McLean’s voice. It didn’t help. Elliot opened his eyes
just as Jimmy was sliding the briefs up long legs. He groaned again and shifted uncomfortably. “You okay?” Jimmy asked casually, dressing quickly and keeping his eyes off the other man. He remembered the guilt he had fought with before, and it tempered the temptation the other man was creating. “Are you dressed yet?” Elliot asked in a strangled voice. God, he wanted him. But he knew he’d never forgive himself for screwing Jimmy again – at least until he found out if what he had with McLean was going to turn into something. Jimmy laughed softly. “Getting there,” he said soothingly. He glanced over at Elliot as he pulled a soft T-shirt over his head and tamped down the desire to tease him. That very nearly always led to fucking, in Jimmy’s experience. And he really didn’t want to call Millis tonight and tell him about yet another transgression. Elliot groaned again and moved his hands to cover his closed eyes. “You are a sinful temptation,” he said seriously against his hands. Jimmy glanced up at him, slightly hurt by the implication. “Sinful?” he asked. Elliot sighed and dropped his hands to look at Jimmy again. “Oh, it’s a good thing, believe me. Except that I’m trying really hard not to give into temptation, see?” He wished now he had a face to go with McLean’s voice. It would make it easier to hold the thought of him in mind. Jimmy looked at him closely and nodded slightly. “Got someone waiting for you?” he asked neutrally. “Hopefully,” Elliot answered. God, he hoped. But being this close… . “Believe me, if I didn’t….” He swallowed hard and looked at Jimmy intently. Jimmy met Elliot’s eyes and nodded. “I’m sorry,” he offered, “I didn’t realize….” Elliot relaxed a little, feeling better now that he’d said something. “It’s okay,” he said reassuringly. Jimmy smiled slightly and looked down at his bag. “We’ll be mutually supportive, then,” he proposed with a smirk.
“Mutually supportive, huh? You got somebody now?” Elliot narrowed his eyes. “Now – and not then, I hope,” he said, referring to their last encounter. Then he remembered how Jimmy had been acting there at the end of their weekend together. “You did, didn’t you?” he said in surprise. “That’s why you were acting funny. You were acting guilty.” He shifted and started to climb out of the bed. Jimmy looked back up at him with a frown, but he couldn’t really deny the accusation. Elliot stood up, by necessity close. “Why didn’t you say something?” he asked accusingly before reaching for his cell phone that he’d set on the countertop. Jimmy put his hand flat on Elliot’s chest to stop him. “There was nothing to say,” he insisted calmly. Stopping when touched, Elliot looked at him. “What do you mean, nothing?” Jimmy shrugged self-consciously, but didn’t remove his hand. “It was more of a… wishful thinking,” he said with difficulty. Elliot’s face softened from its hard lines. “Oh. Okay.” Jimmy looked down and carefully removed his hand from Elliot’s chest. Elliot caught it again and squeezed it lightly. “I’m sorry,” he murmured. Jimmy cleared his throat and looked back up at Elliot wryly. “You’re a little too close to be supportive,” he said softly. Stepping back slowly, Elliot let go of Jimmy’s hand and got as far back as he could, which wasn’t much. “I shouldn’t stay,” he said. “This… I….” “What are you, kidding?” Jimmy asked gently. “I’m so tired, you’d have to do all the work, anyway.” Elliot peered at him before nodding slowly. “Sleep, then?” he asked. “Sleep,” Jimmy agreed softly. Elliot nodded and gestured to the bed. “You in first. They’re going to call me when the truck gets here. Won’t have to bother you when it’s time to climb out.”
Jimmy smiled crookedly, giving Elliot one last look before moving around him carefully and crawling into bed. Sighing, Elliot decided against taking anything off when he turned off the overhead light and laid down on the bed next to Jimmy – on top of the covers. He could control himself now. He wasn’t too sure about when he was asleep. He stared up at the ceiling and thought of McLean, wondering when they might have a chance to meet. “Get under the damn covers,” Jimmy grumbled. Elliot turned his head to peer at Jimmy in the darkness, not able to make much out. “Not a good idea,” he murmured. “I’m not going to molest you,” Jimmy told him in amusement. “I don’t think.” Elliot actually chuckled. “I’m not sure I can say the same,” he admitted. “I….” Jimmy waited silently, then shifted slightly, pinned down by Elliot’s weight on top of the covers. “You what?” he prodded. “Want you,” Elliot breathed. “But I want him more, I think.” He closed his eyes. There was nothing to see in the darkness. Jimmy found himself mildly excited by the admission, but he thought of Millis and closed his eyes guiltily. “I know exactly how you feel,” he muttered. Elliot reached out blindly and touched Jimmy’s face, then skimmed his hand lightly over Jimmy’s cheek. “Go to sleep,” he whispered. Jimmy caught at his hand in the darkness and held it, motionless. Elliot sighed soundlessly and turned on his side to face Jimmy so his arm wasn’t stretched over his own chest. He didn’t try to pull his hand back. Jimmy was still trapped under the sheets by his weight, but the dim light shone on his blue eyes as he stared at Elliot. He shifted a little, licking his lips as his thumb rested on the pulse point in Elliot’s wrist. “Tell me about him,” Jimmy requested hoarsely, trying desperately to remind himself that there was someone he wanted more than the man currently in bed with him.
Elliot dropped his eyes before they could give away how much he yearned for McLean. “He’s… funny. Happy. God, he’s happy. Makes me crazy sometimes. But I love it about him. Just listening to him makes me smile.” Jimmy smiled weakly and nodded. “Sounds nice,” he murmured, unable to think of anything else to say. He’d be happy, too, if he was fucking Elliot regularly. “Yeah,” Elliot agreed. He was quiet for a couple minutes. “What about your wishful thinking?” Jimmy smiled wistfully and finally loosened his grip on Elliot’s wrist a little. “He’s cranky,” he answered with a laugh. “Actually, I’ve never really… met him.” Elliot’s eyes opened. He could see Jimmy a little bit more since his eyes adjusted to the lower light. “Haven’t met him?” he asked, brow furrowing. Jimmy cleared his throat. “That’s why it’s wishful thinking,” he said with a tiny shrug of his shoulder. Shifting his head on the pillow, Elliot wondered if that meant he and McLean weren’t so unusual an occurrence. “It’ll work out,” he said. Jimmy would find his wishful thinking, just like he’d found McLean. Elliot wondered all of a sudden why he’d never asked McLean’s name. It hadn’t been important, he supposed. He wanted the man, not his name. Jimmy laughed softly and sighed. “Yeah. You’re right, you need to stay above the covers.” Elliot ruffled Jimmy’s hair before pulling his hand back to him. “Go to sleep,” he said gravely. “Ugh,” Jimmy responded in disgust. “If our wishful thinkings don’t work out,” he groaned, “I intend to track you down again.” Elliot stared into the darkness. “You’re on,” he finally answered. “I’m definitely something,” Jimmy grumbled disconsolately as he shifted uncomfortably in the bed. “Go to sleep,” Elliot wheedled. “Please. Please, go to sleep,” he practically begged. Having the other man’s heat so close was terribly enticing.
Jimmy grunted at him and rolled over with difficulty, muttering under his breath good-humoredly. Elliot sighed and rolled the opposite direction so their backs were to each other. He was able to relax some and he yawned. Jimmy pulled his arm out from under the sheet and reached behind him to pat Elliot’s hip. “Good luck,” he offered with a smile. “You, too,” Elliot said softly. “You, too.” Elliot closed his eyes to sleep, and it seemed like his phone rang right away. He grabbed it and checked the display, actually disappointed. Yes, it was six hours later. But it wasn’t McLean. He answered and talked to the driver, who said he’d be there in ten with Elliot’s truck. After thanking him, Elliot closed the connection and rolled back to his side, where Jimmy lay under the covers. Jimmy grunted and moved, trying to roll over in his sleep but not able to because of the restraining covers. He struggled a little more and woke himself with the effort, and he flopped and burrowed and rolled until he was facing Elliot and looking at him sleepily. “What?” he asked dazedly. “My truck’s about here,” Elliot said, his voice hoarse from sleeping. “So I’m taking off. Thanks. For the bed… and the talk.” Jimmy closed his eyes tight and then opened them wide, trying to wake himself. “No problem,” he muttered. He lay still for a brief moment, then reached over to Elliot and put his hand on the side of his face. He shifted closer and pressed his lips to Elliot’s gently, kissing him as chastely as possible to say goodbye. Elliot accepted the kiss, though it took all his willpower not to turn it into more. When Jimmy pulled back, Elliot leaned to kiss his forehead once before making himself roll out of the bed and slide into his shoes. He stuck his phone on his belt and picked up his duffel before stopping to look at Jimmy one last time. The other man rested on one elbow as he looked back up at Elliot. “I’ll be seeing you,” he murmured with a nod of his head. A small, self-deprecating smile quirked Elliot’s lips, and he slung his duffel into the passenger seat so he could climb past it. He pushed open the door, but straightened to look back at Jimmy.
“If he doesn’t love you, he’s a fool,” Elliot said, looking over Jimmy’s handsome face. Without waiting for an answer, Elliot clambered out of the truck, grabbed his bag, and shut the door behind him. Inside the big black rig, Jimmy flopped onto his back and smacked his hands over his eyes. “Agh!” he offered into the silence. Was he fucking insane? How could he let a man like Elliot Cochran just walk away when the only thing keeping him from it was the promise of something special with someone he’d never even met? He scrambled out of his bed, the sheets once again covered with Elliot’s scent, and rummaged for the phone that had been charging as they slept. He had to talk to Millis, and right now, before he did something stupid. Again. He found the phone and, regardless of the obscene hour, dialed Millis and waited almost desperately to hear the man’s voice. The phone rang and rang, until it clicked over to an impersonal recording prompting the caller to leave a message. Jimmy spared a moment to pitch a tiny little hissy fit in the cabin of his truck, barely restraining himself from throwing the phone in frustration. When the phone beeped he took a deep breath and closed his eyes to calm himself. “Millis,” he managed to grit out. “I really need to hear your voice, man. Call me. Don’t care what time it is. In fact… waking up to you would be pretty damn perfect right about now,” he mumbled miserably before closing the phone and looking out the window. He almost hoped he didn’t see Elliot out there. But he did. About fifty yards across the gravel lot, Elliot stood talking to a driver, signing papers on a clipboard. In front of a dark red and blue Century-class rig with Millis Freight painted prominently on the side of the trailer. Jimmy took a step closer to look and nearly toppled down the inner stairs of the rig. He flailed and grabbed the bulkhead, blinking at the truck and Elliot in befuddlement, and then he looked down at his phone. “Not possible,” he muttered to himself before looking back up disbelievingly. “Millis?” he whispered as he watched through the window. “No, no, no. Coincidence,” Jimmy told himself. If Elliot and Millis were the same person, then Elliot would have mentioned the bigass McLean diamond on the truck. He would have mentioned that he had never met the man he was talking about, either….
It hit Jimmy that Elliot just might have been talking about him when he spoke of the man he wanted, and he flushed with warmth and tentative excitement. “I’m a happy guy,” he told himself as he looked around the rig. But if Elliot was Millis, why didn’t he answer his phone? Jimmy looked down at the phone in his hand and then back up at Elliot across the parking lot. What if it was him? What if Jimmy went out there and asked him, and Elliot was disappointed? Elliot had had a chance with Jimmy, with him, and he had turned it down for someone he wanted more, someone he thought was better. It didn’t really matter that Jimmy thought maybe Elliot had turned him down for… Jimmy. He shook his head and grunted. This was getting confusing. The bottom line was, what if Elliot was Millis, but he didn’t want Jimmy to be who he thought McLean was? Jimmy stared out the window indecisively and clutched at his phone. Elliot handed the other driver back the clipboard, and they shook hands. The driver walked off, and Elliot kicked at the gravel, obviously annoyed, before he leaned over to pick up his duffel. He stopped halfway and straightened, looking at his belt like something had stuck him in the side. He pulled the cell phone off his belt and looked at it, but he was turned the wrong way for his face to be clear. Jimmy watched him, his own phone heavy in his hand as he waited to see what Elliot would do. Elliot hit a couple buttons and listened as he paced, then he frowned obviously enough that Jimmy could see it. He hit a button and then another, and raised the phone to his ear, pacing some more, as if nervous. Jimmy watched tensely, and even though he was half expecting it, he nearly hit the top of the truck when the phone in his hand began to sing. He stared down at it, nearly panting as he tried to catch his breath, then he looked back up at Elliot as the phone continued to ring. Elliot continued to pace back and forth, shoulders stiff, waiting as the phone kept ringing. Jimmy fought with himself, clutching the phone and wondering if he was even capable of carrying on a conversation at this point. What would he say? Should he tell Elliot what he knew? How…. He looked down at the display of his phone, seeing the word ‘Millis’ there and feeling the ghost of the same feeling he always did when
he saw that caller ID. He looked back up, watching Elliot as he waited. It was hard to place the two people into one picture. “Jesus,” he breathed as he found himself a little lightheaded. He had to take the person he knew as Millis, the person he was pretty sure he had fallen slightly in love with, and put him in a package that looked like Elliot? For real? He had been a very good boy in a past life…. Right? The phone continued to sing, but then the song cut off in mid-note and Jimmy knew it was taking Elliot over to his voicemail. Elliot’s shoulders slumped where he stood outside, and he appeared to speak into the phone for a few moments before ending the call. He tapped the phone against his leg before hanging it back on his belt and reaching down for his bag in a sharp movement that betrayed frustration. Jimmy watched him, growling about how much of a chickenshit he was being. Finally, he gave himself a mental kick in the ass and thumped down the steps, stumbling out of the truck. He closed the door tightly, giving no notice to the fact that he was still barefoot in nothing but his sweatpants and T-shirt as he began jogging toward the red Millis rig. Elliot slung the bag over his shoulder and took the several steps to the truck and reached to unlock the door, but the duffel slipped on his arm and he dropped the keys. They clinked on the concrete and skidded a little bit under the stairs. With a grunt, Elliot dropped the duffel again and went down on one knee to reach for the keys. Jimmy was silent on his bare feet as he jogged toward the truck and then slowed as he got close. He padded slowly to stand behind Elliot, his heart pounding as he tried to decide on a course of action. He cocked his head to admire the view as Elliot groped for the keys. “Goddang keys,” Elliot muttered crankily. First he had to leave a gorgeous Jimmy in bed, untouched, then suffer some crap with the driver about signing over the truck, and then McLean didn’t answer his phone right after calling and leaving a nearly heartbreaking message in the first place, and now this with the stupid keys. “If this day is as much of a dang pain as yesterday I’m gonna flippin’ throttle somebody,” he growled, finally getting his fingers on the keys.
“I hear starting a day with breakfast usually helps,” Jimmy offered from behind him, surprised by how even and normal his voice sounded. Elliot fell over onto his ass with an ooomph and looked up at Jimmy. “Ow,” he said petulantly. Jimmy’s lips quirked in amusement and he stepped forward, offering his hand. “Sorry.” He laughed softly. “Didn’t mean to sweep you off your feet,” he snickered. Elliot accepted his hand and let himself be pulled to his feet, and then he rubbed a hand over his ass. “Thanks,” he muttered. He drew a breath and looked at Jimmy, all tousled and warm, and tried to ignore the want screaming inside him. “Did I… forget something?” Jimmy stared at him, seeing the slightly annoyed look he hoped was more because of the world and not just him. No. He didn’t want to tell Elliot who he really was and see those gorgeous brown eyes disappointed. He gathered what little wits he had and shook his head with a slight smile. “No,” he answered. “But I can’t get back to sleep,” he said, thinking to himself that it was the truth, at least. “I thought maybe I could entice you into joining me for breakfast,” he said, wondering if he should change the way he talked to keep from sounding like himself. How had he not recognized Elliot’s voice as belonging to Millis? Tipping his head to one side, Elliot looked Jimmy up and down doubtfully. “You’re not dressed for breakfast.” He shifted uncomfortably and his hand went back to his cell phone. He really wanted McLean to call back. He’d sounded so upset on the phone, desperate even. Elliot could sympathize. He made himself look back at Jimmy and thought about how last night he’d almost told Jimmy that McLean sounded a lot like him. Confusion tore at him. What was he supposed to do? “I wanted to catch you before you left,” Jimmy explained with a nod to the truck behind Elliot. “Nice rig,” he added as he looked over at the door. “Millis, huh?” he asked as he looked back at Elliot. Elliot almost wavered as he was swept with déjà vu. Jimmy sounded so much like McLean when he said ‘Millis’ that it was shocking. Elliot couldn’t stop from staring at Jimmy as the wheels in his head turned rapidly. He blinked and glanced away from Jimmy to look back toward the big black truck across the lot. It couldn’t possibly…. He swallowed hard. “McLean?” he asked weakly.
Jimmy very nearly let himself admit it. He wanted to, so badly. But he could see the edges of something creeping into Elliot’s eyes, and he couldn’t watch it develop into something that hurt. He smiled slightly, affecting a befuddled look, and he nodded. “Yeah, we’re out of North Carolina,” he answered, hoping his voice was neutral and convincing. A heapload of disappointment threatened to knock Elliot over. For a moment, just a moment, he’d let himself believe it could be possible that Jimmy was McLean. Now he just dropped his eyes and squeezed them shut. “Ah, breakfast, sure,” he said awkwardly. “I need to stow my crap in the new truck, shouldn’t take too long.” Jimmy watched him with an uncomfortable tightening of his chest. “Elliot?” he asked softly as the other man turned away. “You okay?” he asked hoarsely. Elliot ran a hand over his own shoulder and gripped the back of his neck. “Ah, yeah,” he mumbled. “I guess so.” He took a deep breath and made himself straighten up. Jimmy probably thought he was a total idiot at this point. He glanced up with vulnerable brown eyes. “Breakfast?” he asked. Jimmy nodded, feeling like a complete bastard and coward and a few other things he didn’t want to explore. “You stash your stuff, I’ll go get dressed,” he told Elliot with difficulty, clearing his throat as if that might make speech easier. He was an idiot. He should ’fess up now and risk Elliot’s reaction. He had been heartbroken before, could it really hurt that much worse this time? Yes. Yes, it could. Jimmy turned away and began walking carefully back to his rig, much more aware of the sharp gravel on the ground than he had been before. Elliot stared after him. He’d chosen to walk away from Jimmy twice already, and this morning, Jimmy had come after him, even knowing Elliot was trying to build something with someone else. Elliot warred with himself. He could take what Jimmy offered now and be happy, while always wondering about what might have been with McLean. He wasn’t sure he’d be able to live with himself, or what he’d do when it was over with Jimmy. Or he could let Jimmy go, again, and hope and pray that this something he had with McLean panned out and lasted.
Either way, it looked like he was royally screwed in the most unpleasant sense possible. Story of his life. Back in his rig, Jimmy got dressed slowly, frowning and chewing on his lower lip as he tried to decide what to do. He got out his phone and stared at it, then he opened it impulsively and called his voicemail to hear the message Elliot had left. “Hey, McLean.” Millis’s voice was concerned, plaintive, and a little harried. “I got your message, and I’d really like to hear from you, too. Really. Please call me back? Please? Bye.” Jimmy swallowed heavily and looked out the window. Seeing that Elliot was still in his truck, Jimmy dialed as his stomach tumbled with nerves. The hand he held the phone with trembled slightly as he held it to his ear. It was answered almost immediately. “McLean?” “Hey,” Jimmy greeted gruffly as he stared out the window. “You okay? Your message worried me.” Millis’s voice was oddly shaky. Elliot’s voice. Jimmy swallowed with difficulty. “Yeah,” he answered finally. “I was just having a little crisis of conscience,” he admitted honestly. “Are you okay?” “Ah… actually, no. I’m not,” Elliot said. “I really wish you were here.” Jimmy closed his eyes and sat down heavily. He was a masochist, he had to be. There was no other explanation for him not to just blurt out where he was. “I’m sorry,” he muttered, not quite realizing that he said it out loud. “What for? Wasn’t your fault you got held up. Where are you, anyway?” There were soft thumps in the background. “In my truck,” Jimmy muttered immediately, his eyes still closed and still berating himself inwardly. “Funny,” Elliot said wryly. “And where’s your truck? Did you get to move at all yesterday?”
“Yeah,” Jimmy whispered. He looked around and closed his eyes. “I ended up making it to Kansas City, but there wasn’t a single red and blue truck in the lot,” he went on. He hadn’t lied, yet…. “I got hit by a four-wheeler,” Elliot said slowly. There was squeaking like he was sitting down. “They hauled my rig to the garage. You… did you get here?” Jimmy was silent, pressing his lips tightly together as he stared blankly at the window. God, what was he doing? He could ruin a very good thing here. “Yeah, I got there,” he said slowly. “You’re still at the Conoco, aren’t you?” he asked in a voice tinged with grim acceptance. Silence. “Yeah,” was the soft, almost broken sound. Jimmy was silent, fighting with himself. He wanted to get out of the truck and go over there and hug the man. There was nothing stopping him but cowardice. “Jesus, Millis,” he sighed regretfully as he hung his head. “You’re not, are you. Still at the Conoco.” Elliot’s voice was flat with resignation. Jimmy was silent. He had never been good at lying. And he didn’t want to lie to Elliot. He swallowed heavily and got up, walking to the door to look out on the parking lot. “I think I might love you, Millis,” he whispered instead of answering. “Is that stupid? To love someone you’ve never really met?” A long moment of quiet. “If it is, then we’re both absolute idiots.” Jimmy’s smile was sad and weak. “Do you think it’s a good idea?” he asked tentatively. “I think it’s the best idea I’ve had since I left Wilton, Wisconsin,” Elliot said in frustration. “But I can’t even see you!” “That’s what I mean,” Jimmy murmured. “What if we see each other and what we have here doesn’t… translate?” he asked sadly. “What if….” “Goddangit, McLean. How are we gonna ever know? God. You could be three hundred pounds with a beer gut, and I’d still love you,” Elliot said in an achingly painful voice. “I… just need to see you. Touch you. Know you’re real.”
Jimmy closed his eyes and swallowed. “Okay,” he whispered. “I’ll come to you, okay?” he managed to say. “You stay where you are.” “Yes. Okay,” Elliot said, voice wavering. “I won’t move.” “See you soon,” Jimmy managed to whisper before he ended the call. He was shaking violently, and he sat back down with a thump and closed his eyes, trying to breathe normally. Finally, he forced himself to move. He pulled on a pair of clean jeans and his battered boots, then shrugged into one of his many faded western-style shirts and grabbed his hat as he left the truck. He slid the hat onto his head as he walked toward the red Millis truck, grateful that he could hide behind its brim if he needed to. He didn’t even bother buttoning up his shirt over the thin T-shirt underneath. He stepped up to the Millis rig and knocked on the driver’s door tentatively. Inside, Elliot startled when he heard the knock and realized it had to be Jimmy. Jimmy. He’d have to tell him he couldn’t leave the truck. McLean was coming. Oh God. McLean was coming. Elliot stood up and climbed over the driver’s seat to open the door and look out and down onto a familiar cowboy hat. Jimmy raised his head and looked up at him from under the brim. “Hey. Um. Can breakfast wait a little while? I need to stay here,” Elliot said nervously. God. Jimmy and McLean, practically together. How was he going to handle this? Jimmy huffed slightly. “No,” he answered matter-of-factly, hiding his shaking hands in the pockets of his jeans. “Come on, let’s eat.” Elliot swallowed. “I can’t. I need to stay here.” His voice shook. “McLean is coming. I told him I’d stay here. I’m sorry.” Jimmy sighed heavily and shook his head, looking down and hiding his face from Elliot’s view with the brim of his hat. “You told him you’d stay right here,” he asked sarcastically as he pointed down at the ground. Elliot’s jaw clenched, confused by how Jimmy was acting. “Jimmy. He knows my truck. Look….” Elliot climbed down from the cab to stand next to him. “I have to know about him. I think… I think I
might love him. I know it’s crazy. Believe me, if it weren’t for him, I’d still be in your bed with no plans to ever let you go.” Jimmy looked at him blankly for a long moment. Finally, he pursed his lips slightly and nodded as if he understood. He took his hat off and glanced around the lot, then looked back at Elliot and grabbed him by the front of his shirt. He pulled him closer and kissed him. Elliot flailed to grab onto the door with one hand and Jimmy with the other. He felt himself melting and his resistance weakening. God, how he wanted this man. But he wanted McLean, too. Jimmy at least knew about McLean. Elliot had to, in all conscience, let McLean know about Jimmy. But he had to see him to do it. Their lips slid and meshed and mashed, and Elliot was breathing hard when he finally jerked back. “How long are you going to wait?” Jimmy asked softly as he allowed Elliot to pull away. “Why?” Elliot asked hoarsely. Jimmy’s lips quirked into a smile and he shook his head, then slid his hat back onto his head. “Jesus, Millis, you are one stubborn bastard,” he laughed as he looked out on the parking lot. Elliot blinked as his heart stopped, and his hand tightened so much on the door that his knuckles turned white. “Jimmy?” Jimmy lowered his head, still hiding behind the brim of his hat. “I meant stay at the truck stop, not grow roots and refuse to eat,” he said softly as he looked up at Elliot with an expectant wince. Elliot blinked at him in confusion as the pieces started coming together. “You’re… him?” he whispered in disbelief. Jimmy gave a self-conscious shrug and licked his lips. sorry,” he offered softly.
“I’m
“Sor… how long have you known?” Elliot asked, wavering between being thrilled and being really very upset. “When I saw your truck,” Jimmy admitted with a blush. He looked over at the red and blue cab and trailer, unable to watch Elliot’s expressive eyes.
“But the truck just got here,” Elliot said. “So….” He made the connection. “You saw me. When I called him. You. When I called you.” Jimmy was McLean. McLean was Jimmy. Oh God! Jimmy looked back at Elliot hesitantly and nodded. Elliot stared at him for a long moment, then grabbed his arm and dragged Jimmy up the stairs behind him into the truck. Jimmy called out in surprise and flailed gracelessly, stumbling up the narrow steps behind him. “Shut the door,” Elliot growled angrily once they were both inside. Jimmy did so obediently, wincing in expectation of a justifiable tirade. Oh, God, would Elliot hit him? Elliot was a big guy, and strong…. When the door slammed shut, Elliot grabbed Jimmy’s arm and yanked him back into the cab… and into his arms. “I should beat you within an inch of your life,” Elliot rasped as he held Jimmy close. Jimmy reached up with difficulty and pushed his hat back so he could be held. He gasped out a breath and wrapped his arms around Elliot carefully. “Please don’t,” he requested weakly. “Oh God,” Elliot murmured painfully. “You’re him. You’re him.” He clutched Jimmy closer before pulling back and shaking him. “What the hell were you thinking, trying to make me think you weren’t you?” Jimmy shook his head wordlessly and his brow furrowed pitifully. “I didn’t want you to be disappointed,” he admitted in a whisper. “Disappointed?” Elliot asked in horror. “How in God’s name could I ever be disappointed with you? It’s the two things I’ve ever loved rolled into one hell of a gorgeous package!” Jimmy laughed softly and shook his head again in disbelief. “The way you talked about… me,” he mumbled. “I didn’t know if I could live up to it.” Elliot raised his eyes to heaven. “Every bit of it was the truth. Please, Jimmy… tell me. Are you disappointed with me? Me being Millis?” Jimmy laughed again. “Are you kidding?” he asked with a grin. “Look at you.” Elliot nodded somberly. “So why not believe I think the same of you?” He cupped Jimmy’s cheek and kissed him longingly.
Jimmy’s entire body tingled with the touch. There was something different about this kiss, something even more special and poignant about it being the man he knew as Millis kissing him. He reached up and ran his fingers into Elliot’s hair and groaned slightly. Tightening his arm around Jimmy’s waist, Elliot shivered when he heard Jimmy’s warm sound. “Jesus, I’m a lucky man...” he said as he skimmed his lips along Jimmy’s throat. “Don’t ever want to let you go. About killed me leaving you this morning.” “Good,” Jimmy whispered with another heartfelt groan. “I couldn’t help but… that’s why I called you,” he admitted as he kept his eyes closed and pressed his forehead to Elliot’s. He laughed at how ridiculous the admission would sound. “I needed to hear your voice so I didn’t go chasing after the guy who’d just left.” Elliot huffed quietly and hugged Jimmy even closer. “We’re a pair, aren’t we? This would have been much simpler if we’d recognized each other’s voices. Just never occurred to me that I would actually run into you – into McLean. Those nights at the hotel….” Jimmy closed his eyes and groaned feelingly. “Oh, God,” he breathed. “It was you. Christ, all this time I’ve been feeling guilty,” he laughed wryly as he took Elliot’s face in his hands and kissed him quickly. “We can have those nights again and not regret it,” he whispered. “As many fucking times as we want!” He snickered gleefully. “Jesus. Too many times and you’ll give me a heart attack,” Elliot muttered as he grasped Jimmy’s ass and held him tightly. “But I think I’d enjoy that, actually.” Jimmy kissed him again and grinned widely. something,” he murmured happily.
“Ain’t this
“God. Happy. You’re so dang happy,” Elliot said woefully. “What’s wrong with happy?” Jimmy asked in a slightly hurt voice. “Nothing wrong with happy. You’re just always happy,” Elliot whined. “And now you’ll be even more happy, and so will I. What will I have to complain about?” Jimmy pursed his lips. “Food?” he suggested.
Elliot grinned before he could stop himself. muttered.
“Aw, man,” he
“What?” Jimmy asked with a laugh. “Now I’m smiling, too,” Elliot said as he groped. “Think breakfast can wait?” “I don’t know, I was looking forward to breakfast,” Jimmy drawled cheekily. “I think maybe we should move this to my rig,” he suggested. Elliot frowned. “Move?” His hands tightened on Jimmy’s ass. “Move?” “It would require moving, yeah,” Jimmy affirmed with a sorrowful nod. He took Elliot’s face in his hands and pulled him closer, putting his lips to Elliot’s ear. “Does your new rig have lube in it?” he asked with a smirk. “We need to move to your truck,” Elliot said immediately before kissing Jimmy hard. Jimmy laughed into the kiss, unable to stop himself. Elliot jerked away, grabbed Jimmy’s arm and pulled him along out of the truck and across the gravel to the big black rig with the red diamond. Jimmy stumbled along after him, snickering helplessly the entire way. “God, you’re grumpy!” he laughed finally. “Open the flippin’ door, Jimmy, or you’ll really see cranky,” Elliot warned. “You would be much more convincing if you’d cuss with some feeling,” Jimmy advised. He pressed his back against the door to his cab and blinked at Elliot innocently. “I could grow to like this,” he observed casually. Elliot narrowed his eyes. “You could? What do you mean?” He was almost bouncing on his toes. Jimmy smiled at him and shook his head. growly,” he snickered as he held out his keys.
“You getting all
Elliot took the keys and stepped right up against Jimmy’s body as he unlocked the door. “You haven’t seen growly yet,” he purred.
Jimmy closed his eyes and practically beamed up at the other man, letting his hands slide around Elliot’s waist. “Get it unlocked,” he ordered impatiently. Twisting the keys, Elliot pulled the door open and shoved Jimmy up the stairs, quick to follow on his heels and pull the door shut behind them. As soon as he got to the top of the stairs and closed the curtains Jimmy tackled him, grabbing hold of him and dragging him toward the bed. “I almost fell down those steps and broke my neck when I saw your truck,” he muttered as he placed random kisses on Elliot’s face and neck, all trace of his smile gone. “You did?” Elliot gasped as he started pulling at Jimmy’s clothes. “Only thing that stopped me was the door,” Jimmy giggled as he ran his hands through Elliot’s hair. “Thank God,” Elliot said fervently. “If you’d fallen and broken something I might have driven away before you could get my attention.” He unbuttoned Jimmy’s jeans and started shoving them over Jimmy’s hips. Jimmy closed his eyes and smiled. “I had your number, though,” he reminded slyly. Elliot slowed down and kissed the corner of Jimmy’s eye. “Yeah. You sure got my number,” he murmured. “I love you,” Jimmy whispered tentatively. Elliot touched Jimmy’s cheek so gently, so unlike his calloused, heavy fingers. “First I loved your voice, then your sense of humor – your unstoppable good mood – then I loved your face, your body, what you made me feel. To have it all together in one man….” Elliot shook his head slowly. “I can hardly believe how much I love you.” Jimmy grinned slowly and tilted his head, looking at Elliot’s eyes pensively. “Okay,” he murmured, “stop talking and fuck me.” “God, yes,” Elliot said gruffly, and he spread his big hands over Jimmy’s hips as he shoved his jeans down further before yanking him close to grind them together. He lowered his mouth to Jimmy’s neck and bit down carefully.
Jimmy groaned and tilted his head to the side, sliding his hands up Elliot’s back appreciatively. He reached behind Elliot to grab the handle of the utility drawer and yanked it open. “Come on,” he invited. Elliot shoved Jimmy so that he fell back on the bed, then he dug into the drawer and pulled out the supplies. He tossed the lube and condom on the bed before slowly undoing his jeans, watching Jimmy the whole time as he pushed them and his briefs down and kicked them aside. His T-shirt went next, and he stood there nude, unashamed and aroused, looking down at Jimmy. “Well, McLean,” he said thickly. “What do you have to say now?” Jimmy licked his lips and smiled slowly, using one hand to try and get out of his shirt distractedly. “I think,” he murmured slowly, “that you’re going to have to cancel your next delivery.” Leaning over to pull Jimmy’s jeans and briefs off, Elliot hummed inquisitively. “Is that so?” he drawled before dipping his head to drag his tongue from the soft skin of the inside of Jimmy’s thigh up to a tightened nipple. Jimmy writhed slowly beneath him, squirming and groaning plaintively. “Come on, Millis,” he moaned pleadingly. “Come on and fuck me.” Elliot growled and pounced on him, capturing Jimmy’s lips roughly as he rubbed their bodies and cocks together. “Gonna pound you through this mattress,” he said hoarsely as he reached for the bottle of lube. “Please,” Jimmy breathed as his entire body fizzed with anticipation. Rearing back to settle between Jimmy’s thighs, Elliot squeezed lube onto his fingers and slid them between Jimmy’s legs. “Wanted this after that first night – thought about this after I left you sleeping,” he admitted roughly. “Was afraid….” “Of what?” Jimmy asked breathlessly. Elliot’s face transformed to one of awed adoration. wouldn’t be able to leave.”
“That I
Jimmy looked up at him for a long, serious moment before he smiled again and closed his eyes. “I damn near went after you,” he admitted with a smile. Both Elliot’s brows rose as he carefully pushed his fingers into Jimmy. “You were asleep!” “No,” Jimmy admitted. “No, I wasn’t.” Elliot moved his hand more slowly as he looked down at his lover. “Then you felt me kiss you goodbye,” he murmured, looking wistful. Jimmy smiled softly and nodded as he reached up for Elliot’s cheek. Turning his cheek into Jimmy’s hand, Elliot let out a shuddering breath. “It was so hard to leave. But it was ten times… a hundred times worse this morning.” Jimmy swallowed heavily and nodded. Elliot squeezed his eyes shut as he eased more fingers into Jimmy, using his own thighs to tilt Jimmy’s hips upward. “Why didn’t you say anything? Why play dead?” he asked. “One word… I would have stayed.” “Because I would have asked you to stay,” Jimmy admitted with a wince. Pulling his fingers free of Jimmy’s body, Elliot took hold of his own cock and pumped it several times before rolling on the condom. Slicking it with what was on his hand, he shifted and pushed just enough to penetrate Jimmy, then he leaned down over him until their lips were a mere breath apart. “So close,” he breathed. “So close and we didn’t know it.” Jimmy gasped and arched his back, moaning against Elliot’s lips and grabbing his arms. Elliot deliberately shifted his hips, just barely sliding his cock’s head back and forth. Jimmy gripped him and dug his fingers into Elliot’s arms as he hitched his hips up to meet the movements. “Come on, Elliot,” he pleaded in a low, hoarse voice. “I’ve been dreaming about this for fucking months.” “Months?” Elliot said faintly as he started moving with more solid thrusts. “Since the first time we talked?”
“Practically,” Jimmy ground out as he threw his head back and reached up to grab the sheets above his head. Elliot scooted himself along Jimmy’s body, pushing up and in while dragging their bodies together. “Wanted you so bad,” Elliot growled. through the dang phone.”
“Would have crawled
Jimmy forced his eyes open and looked up at Elliot, reaching up to catch his hands in Elliot’s messy hair. He shifted his hips and wrapped his legs around Elliot’s waist, making Elliot’s movements the only thing grounding him. “You had me,” he insisted. Elliot groaned and pushed up onto his knees for more leverage. “Couldn’t touch you,” he breathed. “Needed you.” Jimmy’s eyes rolled back and he used his shoulders to push his hips up further to meet Elliot’s thrusts. “Better to live in the present,” he advised tightly. He bit off the words with a soft cry as Elliot thrust into him. “Yes. Yes, now. Mine now,” Elliot huffed as he grasped Jimmy tightly and really started pounding into him with deep, hard jabs. Jimmy cried out wordlessly and flailed, desperately seeking something to grasp. His hands ended up on Elliot’s broad shoulders, and Jimmy tightened his legs around Elliot’s waist to keep himself still. “Fuck,” he gasped in frustration. “Let me roll over,” he breathed. Elliot groaned and dropped his forehead to Jimmy’s shoulder as he stuttered to a stop and backed up and away so Jimmy could move. He didn’t want to be apart even those seconds, but he climbed off the bed and stood beside it, waiting. Jimmy rolled quickly and pushed up onto his hands and knees shakily, his head hanging as he lowered himself to his elbows. “Sweet Jesus,” Elliot breathed as he took in Jimmy in front of himself. He wanted to look, to soak in the sight of his lover’s body, but he couldn’t wait anymore. With a growl that started deep in his chest, he stepped close, slid in, and with a gasp, shoved deep to get totally inside. Jimmy cried out loudly and his fingers gripped the sheets as he pushed back against Elliot. “Come on,” he goaded in a low voice. With a grunt, Elliot settled into a hard rhythm, slapping his groin against Jimmy’s ass every time he thrust in. His fingers dug into Jimmy’s
hips to keep the other man from being pushed away by the forceful thrusts. Jimmy shouted with every thrust, urging Elliot to go harder and deeper and pleading with him to touch him. Elliot slid one hand over Jimmy’s hip to find the bouncing cock underneath his body and wrap his palm around it, letting Jimmy’s movements drive him through his fist. He threw his head back on a strangled cry of delight as he kept up the punishing thrusts. Jimmy’s body stretched like a cat and then tried to curl in on itself as Elliot gripped him. He came with a hoarse roar of bliss, his entire body tensing and spasming as he rode out the pleasure. “Yes, yes, yes...” Elliot chanted hoarsely as he slammed into Jimmy as hard as he could. His lover’s body clutching his was an incredible thrill, and Elliot squeezed his eyes shut and howled as his whole body contracted as he came, riding his continued push as he gasped for breath. His movements forced Jimmy to flatten into the mattress as his muscles stopped working, and when they were both calm once more, Elliot was flat on top of him, pressing him down with his weight. Jimmy groaned softly and turned his head to the side, smiling widely. Elliot lay with his eyes closed, chest still heaving as he perched on one knee on the edge of the bed, pillowed on Jimmy’s back. He twitched as his body reacted to the incredible stress and pleasure. Jimmy began to laugh softly. chuckled.
“Nice to meet you, Millis,” he
Elliot grinned against Jimmy’s sweaty skin and moved his lips to kiss it. “My pleasure, McLean,” he drawled. Jimmy shifted slightly, forcing Elliot out of his body as he rolled. “Ugh,” he offered with a smirk. “We made a mess,” he huffed. Leaning down on the bed, Elliot snickered as he climbed up on the mattress and collapsed longways across the foot of it. “You made a mess.” Jimmy groaned again and laid flat, his arms splayed out to the sides and his feet resting on Elliot. “I’ll live with it,” he finally decided cheerfully. With a put-upon sigh, Elliot reached out, grabbed Jimmy’s ankle, and tickled the bottom of his foot. Jimmy jerked and yipped, kicking his foot away from Elliot and then giving his side a little kick for good
measure. “No! Bad!” he barked, as if scolding a misbehaving dog. Elliot just laughed that deep, from-the-belly laugh as he swiped at Jimmy’s foot again. Jimmy muttered and sat up, kicking Elliot a little harder as he scooted himself to the head of the bed and pulled his feet up to him protectively. Elliot sat up and grinned. “Thought you said you liked my laugh.” “Shut up,” Jimmy laughed affectionately. Elliot crawled up the bed and right onto Jimmy’s lap and proceeded to kiss him silly. Jimmy laughed again, holding Elliot’s face in his hands as he tried not to ruin the kiss with his chuckling. Elliot finally leaned back and looked at Jimmy’s happy face. “You’re so dang gorgeous,” he said. Jimmy blushed slightly under the scrutiny, but he continued to smile affectionately. “Likewise, dollface,” he finally drawled in amusement. Elliot blinked. “Dollface?” he asked incredulously. “Get used to it, Yankee,” Jimmy snickered. “Yankee?” Elliot looked horribly offended. “If you’re gonna call me names, call me Cheesehead, at least.” Jimmy smiled slightly and reached up to pluck at a lock of Elliot’s hair. He pulled it gently until it was straight, watching it raptly, then let it go to watch it bounce back into a loose curl. His smile widened and he looked back into Elliot’s eyes happily. Elliot blinked at him in confusion. “I love that you’re here. Real,” Jimmy told him softly. Elliot smiled softly and reached to rub Jimmy’s cheek with his knuckles. “I’m real. And here. And staying.” “Oh yeah?” Jimmy asked with a smirk. His smile fell briefly and he looked over Elliot’s shoulder. “How?” he asked seriously. Deflating a little, Elliot sighed. “I think you know what I mean,” he said quietly, lacing their fingers together. Jimmy smiled weakly and nodded as he squeezed Elliot’s hand. “When do you have to head out?” he asked softly.
Elliot winced. “I was already behind when the truck got here,” he admitted. Jimmy merely closed his eyes and frowned slightly. Elliot sighed and leaned to kiss the furrows that frown made. “‘S’okay, this time. I’ve got some valid excuses, what with the truck being busted up. But… I do have to go.” Jimmy nodded and looked up at him. “Me, too,” he sighed. “And you just took up all my breakfast time,” he added with the beginnings of a mischievous smile. It was impossible, it seemed, to keep Jimmy down for too long. “You keep that smile up, hear me, lover?” Elliot said as he shifted to climb off Jimmy and the bed. Jimmy grabbed him and kissed him one more time before letting him go. “Be careful,” he requested as he sat naked on his bed. “Shiny,” Elliot said as he got rid of the condom and wiped up with some tissues before pulling on his clothes. “You too, danger-prone Daphne.” Jimmy grinned and snickered quietly. “Never a wreck yet,” he stated as he knocked on the wood grain above his head. “Man, don’t tempt fate,” Elliot whined as he shoved his feet into his shoes and slid his cell phone onto his belt. He leaned over, captured Jimmy’s chin, kissed him hard and messy, and pulled back just as fast. “Gotta go now while I can make myself do it,” he said apologetically, and he backed up to stand in between the curtains, pulling them open enough for him to leave. He turned back to look at Jimmy. “He’s not a fool,” Elliot said. “He loves you.” Jimmy cocked his head at him and smiled widely. “You’re a good thing, Millis,” he responded affectionately. Elliot smiled widely, a handsome look so unusual on him. He winked and was out the door.
JIMMY sat in traffic and tapped at his steering wheel idly, peering out over the vast array of car tops and taillights. He began to whistle when the good song was over, and when he got tired of whistling, he looked around
his cab idly for something to do. It was late, probably too late to call Millis. Elliot. Jimmy grinned impishly at the mere thought that they were the same person. He reached over, plucked his headset out of the console, then picked up the phone and dialed the number anyway. Waking Elliot up was a far better option than Jimmy’s idle hands syndrome. The call was answered, but first there was fumbling and something sliding against the receiver before Elliot spoke. “Yeah?” he asked, clearly mostly asleep. “Entertain me, handsome,” Jimmy cooed unapologetically. “McLean?” Elliot said before clearing his voice. wrong? Stuck?” he asked before yawning audibly.
“Somethin’
“Bored,” Jimmy groaned as he rested back into his massaging chair and turned it on. “I’ve been sitting still for about an hour now, and I’ve run out of things to do,” he said, the vibration of the chair making his voice vibrate along with it. “Wake up,” he drawled out, letting the words vibrate. He grinned and tried not to snicker. Elliot snorted. “You and that dang massage thing.” He sighed and then there were sounds of movement. “Okay, I’m upright and the light is on. That’s about as awake as I’m getting without coffee. What kind of entertainment do you want, hmmmmm?” “My rig doesn’t smell like you anymore,” Jimmy murmured sadly, though he was still smiling faintly. “Hmm. We’ll have to fix that soon, then, won’t we?” Elliot answered, yawning again. “I was dreaming about you.” “Were you?” Jimmy asked in surprise. “I’m sorry to have interrupted then,” he added regretfully. “Was it good?” “Mmmm hmmm. Remembering the hotel. Only we knew who we were. That jacuzzi tub….” Elliot’s voice trailed off. Jimmy closed his eyes and smiled slightly. “We’re never going to live that down, you know?” he murmured. “Not recognizing each other. Not asking enough questions to realize who we were,” he mused. “All I knew was that you were an amazing fuck and I felt guilty about it.”
“Amazing, huh? Flattery will get you screwed even more,” Elliot drawled, his voice warm and pleased. “That’s what I’m counting on,” Jimmy growled happily. “I don’t bottom often, Millis,” he informed Elliot suddenly. “Consider yourself the king of the realm,” he teased. “Don’t bottom often?” Elliot asked, actually sounding surprised. “I’d… never have thought. You seem to enjoy it both ways. I know I do.” “I do,” Jimmy cooed. “But it’s hard to be tossed around when you’re an inch or two taller than whoever’s trying to toss you. I don’t need to tell you that, Hoss,” he laughed. He shifted against the massaging chair and sighed, long and low. “And I do adore tossing you around,” Elliot said, a naughty inflection in his voice. “So tell me, McLean, you know I swing both ways. How about you?” “I didn’t know you swung both ways,” Jimmy responded in surprise. “Did I?” he added uncertainly. “Equal opportunity? reminded him.
Why I left Wilton, Wisconsin?” Elliot
“Ohhh,” Jimmy said quietly. “I remember. Didn’t catch that one,” he admitted softly. “I… I’ve been with two women. One was an experiment when I was fifteen. The other was about five years later, trying to prove to myself with the aid of tequila that I wasn’t really gay. Neither really worked out too well,” he laughed softly. “I’m thankful,” Elliot said quietly. “For that, and that I haven’t found anyone along the way. ’Til now.” “Don’t go getting all mushy on me, Millis,” Jimmy warned uncomfortably. “Dammit,” he grumbled as he turned off his massaging chair with a jab of his finger. “Now I’m all worked up,” he admitted grouchily. Erick snickered. “Not in a position to do anything about it?” “Mind your own business,” Jimmy muttered good-naturedly. His smile faded and he stared out the front of his rig with a slight frown. “I
don’t know how long I can do this deal,” he admitted. “I was happy to roam when I knew no one was waiting for me.” The other end of the line was quiet for a bit. “You have something in mind? It’s not like we have to work anymore…. “ Elliot’s voice cut off. “If you’re, if you’re still interested in that retirement.” He sounded shaky. Unsure. Not quite wistful. Maybe afraid. Jimmy looked down at his phone as if he might be able to see Elliot through it. “I am,” he whispered. “But….” “But?” “I’m not sure how well it would take,” Jimmy admitted quietly. “I miss you, but I’m not sure if I’m quite ready to give up the roaming.” A soft exhale. “I understand,” Elliot said evenly. “I’m not too sure about it myself. Picking a place and just stopping? I’m not sure I can wrap my brain around it. Although anywhere you were would be perfect.” Jimmy closed his eyes and fought back an almost physically painful longing. He didn’t realize that he made a sound, but it came out a low, pained whimper. Elliot sighed. “Crap. I’m sorry, Jimmy. Shouldn’t have said that. It just… came out.” “I’m glad you said it,” Jimmy told him in a slightly choked voice. “I don’t mind a hard decision as long as the outcome is being with you in the end.” A horn sounded and Jimmy looked up quickly, realizing that traffic was slowly moving. “That’s good then.” Elliot’s voice was full of relief. “Christ, I miss you. It’s been two weeks.” “Where are you?” Jimmy asked impulsively. “Tupelo.” “If I up my miles, I might be able to meet up with you soon,” Jimmy told him excitedly. “Yeah?” Elliot’s voice was a little happier. “Where’s your route going? I’m headed north, then east over the next week.” “I’m heading into Tennessee,” Jimmy answered. “Going west. I’ve got a light schedule, I can try to catch you.”
“I’d really, really like that,” Elliot said fervently. Jimmy reached and shifted as his rig began rolling. “I can catch you in Nashville,” he said. “You can try to convince me that I’m young enough to retire,” he said with a smirk. “Young enough? How old are you, anyway?” Elliot asked, amused. “Most people don’t retire until they’re at least sixty. And there’s no way you’re sixty.” “I’m thirty-five, asshole,” Jimmy laughed. “It was a figure of speech. As in, fuck me until I decide that retirement will be more fun than working.” “Oh, firecracker, I can soooo do that,” Elliot promised. “How long do I have to get to Nashville?” Jimmy asked impatiently. “I have needs,” he growled, barely restraining a laugh. “I’ll be there tomorrow night, probably six or so,” Elliot said. “I can make that,” Jimmy told him determinedly. “I’ll make it worth your while,” Elliot promised. “Tease,” Jimmy growled. “Oh no. Not. At. All,” Elliot growled. Jimmy gave another small whimper and shifted gears again as the traffic began to clear. “I’ll see you soon,” he murmured with a smile. “Don’t go getting lost!” “I’ve driven this one before,” Elliot said wryly. “It’s only 250 miles after I unload the trailer.” “When you get there, get a hotel room,” Jimmy demanded. “And order strawberries,” he added. “And whipped cream. And don’t eat them until I get there.” Elliot laughed genuinely. “I’m thinking you want a room at something nicer than the Motel 6, then, huh? All right, I’ll get us someplace nice. How long will you be able to stay?” “That depends on how soon I get there,” Jimmy laughed. “But I should have a few days.”
“Good. I want some quality time,” Elliot said firmly. “I’m not letting go of you for at least an entire day.” “That sounds pretty damn good,” Jimmy responded with a wistful smile. Retirement was beginning to have more and more perks. But even as he drove the sound of the road beneath his wheels begged him not to leave yet. He winced as he realized just how hard the decision ahead of him would be. “What do you think, Millis?” he asked seriously. “You think you could leave it behind with just me to keep you happy?” he asked worriedly. Elliot was quiet a long time. “Why do we have to leave it behind?” he finally asked. “Could be you and me and the road in that RV we talked about. Just not delivering on someone else’s schedule.” Another pause. “I think you’re the first thing that’s ever made me happy.” “You and me and the road,” Jimmy echoed softly. “This idea of yours is sounding better and better. I think maybe we’d stay happy that way.” “Isn’t that the point? You were gonna show me how to be happy? Even better that I can keep you happy.” “You can keep me, Hoss,” Jimmy cooed with a grin. “I will,” Elliot said seriously. Then he yawned again. Jimmy sighed heavily. “Go back to bed,” he whispered intimately. “Call me when you get to Nashville.” Elliot hummed. “I will,” he agreed, sounding very sleepy. “Don’t forget he loves you.” “I know he does,” Jimmy murmured. “He loves you, too,” he said with a smile. “Sweet dreams,” he offered before ending the call. He removed the headset and tossed it into the other seat as he turned his full attention back to the road. He had less than twenty-four hours to get to Nashville. It wouldn’t take that long, not by any means, but with his stops and the weather acting up as he traveled over the mountains, it was going to be a stressful drive. Jimmy smiled. At least it would be worth it.
ELLIOT chuckled and looked around the hotel room. Jimmy was going to laugh his ass off, but it would be worth it. He walked over to the terrace doors and opened them, stepping out into the green, glass-topped atrium, dimly sunny despite the steady rain that had been falling since he arrived in Nashville. A patio restaurant was three floors down from his small suite, and the little ponds and flowing water made nice white noise. There was a walking path, too, that the lady at the desk said went through all the different areas of the hotel. He chuckled again. whipped cream here.
They could certainly get strawberries and
Elliot had decided to go all out and use some of that money that was just sitting there in a back account – one bank account of several – and he got a rental car, laughing at himself the whole time about the big expenditure. After parking his truck down at the TA on I-24, not far south of the interstate bypass, he’d gotten on the internet terminal and looked around Nashville for something he thought would fit Jimmy’s order. He’d run across this huge place, a real fancy resort hotel next to a huge mall, and called to get the room. He picked up a rental car from around the corner (conveniently located) and drove. He could hardly believe how fancy it was, and even cleaned up in jeans and a nice shirt, he’d felt underdressed until he saw lots of people wearing flip flops and shorts. He glanced at the clock. 6:30. He’d been about an hour and a half earlier than he’d thought, which had worked out fine. Now that he was settled, he could call Jimmy and tell him where to park the truck. He pulled the phone of his belt and hit the speed dial. No answer, and voice mail. Hmmm. Elliot hoped that meant Jimmy was driving in traffic close by and didn’t have his headset on. He’d find a place to park when he got into town and call to find out where to go. Shrugging, Elliot flopped down on the couch and turned on the TV, settling happily on a baseball pregame show. Half an hour later, Elliot tried the phone again. No answer, and voice mail. He left a message this time, asking Jimmy to call as soon as he got the message. And he sat back and watched the game as it started at 7:05.
Another half hour later, Elliot was getting really antsy. He’d tried calling again, no answer, and voice mail. He’d gotten up and started pacing, trying to remember where Jimmy had said he was driving in from. If he’d said. With a huff he sat back down and started channel surfing when the ballgame hit a rain delay. He went through the channels at a decent clip, and stopped when he saw a picture of fire over a woman newscaster’s shoulder. “… at the intersection of the Briley and I-40 westbound, and traffic’s backed up for miles out past the airport. It’s one of the more dangerous on and off ramp sets in the city, and the engineers having been working on it for several months with the refurbishment of the Briley. Here’s Jason Burling on the scene.” “Thanks, Mindy. As you can see, it’s still pouring out here, and as the sun goes down it’s just going to get harder to see to find people who are trapped in this pileup, much less getting emergency crews in to the trucks at the center of the pileup and explosion. The one truck is still burning, and we’ve gotten word that it was a hazardous explosives carrier, so people are being evacuated from the area as quickly as possible until the police can find out what was on that truck.” “Jason, what about eastbound traffic?” “The eastbound lanes were totally shut down when the police found out about the explosives on the truck. We have no way of knowing if it’s all blown or not, and they’ve not been able to get in there to find the driver. So they closed the eastbound, and cars are slowly being backed up and rerouted. It’s going to be a mess all night.” “Thank you, Jason. Is there any word on if anyone was killed in either the multiple crashes or the explosion?” “So far the emergency crews have people walking out, luckily. But like I said, they’ve not gotten in to the several cars and two tractortrailers at the center of the mess. Also lucky, though – is the rain! Since it’s raining so hard, it’s really pouring, the fire really didn’t have a chance to burn for long, it’s pretty much out already. But the initial explosion was bad, from what we’ve heard.” The newscast cut to an interview of a woman standing out in the rain, talking about being half a mile back and seeing the huge bloom of
fire and smoke despite the driving rain. But Elliot wasn’t hearing a word. He stared at the television in shock as the cameras started zooming in on the center of the wreck where three cars were rammed up under the side of a blue truck tipped partially over onto another rig – the explosives carrier from the look of the smoke and scorch. Distantly Elliot could tell one or more of the cars had gotten trapped in an outer lane when they wanted to get off onto the Briley, so they swerved right into the blue truck, which rammed into the black truck just short of the offramp. Black truck. It was a black truck, not just scorched black. But Elliot couldn’t see anymore than that. Suddenly he broke out of the daze and snatched his phone off the coffee table, hitting the speed dial again. No answer, and voice mail. Scared to death, Elliot listened to the newscast a little longer. “Jason, have they been able to figure out when the wreck happened?” “There were several eyewitnesses who have come forward to tell us that the wreck happened right around 6:20, Mindy. Traffic’s real heavy through here this time of night, of course, and the rain must not have helped. It looks like rescue workers are getting some people out of the cars that are tucked up under that blue truck. It appears that truck shielded the cars from the explosion.” Elliot swallowed hard as the camera panned across the scene again and started pacing, his cell phone gripped in one sweaty hand. After five more tense minutes he hit the speed dial yet again. When there was no answer he started shaking. Elliot knew he was scaring himself. But he just couldn’t calm down. The thought of Jimmy being in the middle of that mess was driving him crazy. “People are being taken to Southern Mills Medical Center, Mindy, and police estimate about twenty drivers and passengers have suffered minor injuries. A few of the people coming out of the cars from under the blue truck actually look to be fine, and emergency workers are now trying to make their way around the two tractor-trailers to look for the drivers.” “Are the rescue workers concerned about a further explosion, Jason? Trucks that carry explosives and hazardous materials like that can
have several different loads aboard, and there’s a lot of people around there who could be caught in another fire.” “The fire chief here has examined the truck as well as he can and says he’s confident there isn’t any further danger. He’s recommended the rescue efforts move ahead.” Elliot didn’t see the television anymore. He was seeing Jimmy’s face and feeling him in his arms. The newscasters’ voices faded out as he closed his eyes to pray, just in case. He’d never been religious, but if there were ever a time to ask God for help, this was certainly it. When his phone rang, Elliot was so badly startled that he dropped it onto the couch. He scrambled to pick it up, glancing at the display, and almost fell over in relief. He hit the button. “Jimmy, thank God.” “I’m sorry, sir, this isn’t Jimmy,” a man’s voice shouted over a variety of harsh background noises. “Is this a Mr. Millis?” Elliot thought he was going to be sick right then and there. “Yes,” he said hoarsely. “This is Millis.” “Sir, we found this phone in the wreckage of an accident,” the voice shouted over the noise of the scene Elliot could see on the television. “Do you know the man you were calling very well?” “Jesus,” Elliot whispered. “Yes,” he said, his voice stronger. “Yes, I know him very well. Is it the accident on 40 at the Briley?” “Yes, sir, you’ve heard the news?” the man asked with difficulty. “It’s on the news,” Elliot answered, staring at the pictures of the burnt truck and trying to stay upright. “It’s his truck, isn’t it? Have… have you found him?” The man on the phone hesitated briefly. “Yes, sir, we have,” he finally answered. “We were able to locate him finally because we heard his phone ringing. I sure hope you’re fond of him, sir, ’cause you sure as hell saved his life.” Elliot sat down hard, not even feeling it. “Oh God,” he whispered. “Where? Where is he?” he managed to get out. “He’s on his way to Southern Mills, sir,” the man answered with a hint of relief in his voice. “I can’t say that I know how he’s doing, I’m just the guy that pulled him out.”
“Southern Mills is the hospital, right?” Elliot asked as he stood up and walked over to the table where he’d left his wallet and keys. “Yes, sir,” the man answered sympathetically. “Good luck, sir.” “Thanks,” Elliot said fervently as he rushed out the door. He’d ask for directions at the front desk. “He’s got family numbers in the phone, if you’ll call one, okay?” “Those are our next steps,” the man assured him. A heavy door slammed and the siren on an ambulance began to wail very close. The man ended the call without another word.
NEARLY twelve hours later, Elliot hadn’t moved from the chair beside Jimmy’s bed. The nurses who came in to check vitals would move around him quietly as he slept, and at some point someone had draped a blanket over him as he slumped in the hard chair. When Jimmy awoke from a long, fitful sleep, the first thing his bleary eyes landed on was Elliot’s sleeping face. He lay there staring at Elliot for a long time, listening to the beeps and whirs of the machinery that was hooked up to him. His shoulder was a dull ache in a sea of morphine and his lungs burned with every attempt to breathe, but the only thing that really mattered at that moment was the fact that Elliot was right there. Even if he was snoring softly. Finally, Jimmy moved his hand carefully, tapping his fingernails against the metal rail on the side of the bed. Elliot had slept, but it was more a fitful doze that brought him awake each time someone entered the room. After the first couple of nurse’s visits, he was able to stay somewhat asleep, although unconsciously he was listening for something. Listening for Jimmy. The tinny taps were different – odd – and he twitched a little before forcing his sleep-filled eyes open to see Jimmy looking right at him, the mask over his nose and mouth fogging as he breathed out heavily. Elliot sat up in a rush, nearly sliding out of the chair. Jimmy spoke to him, the words muffled by the mask that covered the lower half of his face. He crossed his eyes and looked down at it, then reached up sluggishly to pull at it clumsily.
Elliot scrambled out of the chair and caught Jimmy’s hand. “Leave it, Jimmy. It’s helping you breathe. I think,” he said, curling his fingers loosely around Jimmy’s. Jimmy’s fingers curled weakly around his thumb, and he forced his eyes open again. He said something in response, but it was muffled by the mask. Elliot sighed and carefully pulled the mask away and down over his chin. “We’ll put this back in a minute,” he said softly. “What did you say?” Jimmy swallowed with difficulty and closed his eyes as if it had cost him a great deal of energy. “Hi,” he whispered weakly. Elliot gasped out a weak laugh. “Hi,” he answered, leaning to press a light kiss to Jimmy’s forehead. “How do you feel?” “High,” Jimmy repeated, making himself laugh with the answer. He began to cough weakly and turned his head away from Elliot, trying to stop it. Elliot had to smile. “C’mon, back with the mask. You’ll have to wait to make more puns, McLean.” Once Jimmy stopped coughing, Elliot reached to move the mask back into place. Jimmy squeezed his hand harder to stop him. He inhaled deeply again, coughing a little but able to stop it before it became too bad. The pure oxygen coming through the mask stank like rubber, and it was cold and uncomfortable in his nostrils. He looked up at Elliot and smiled at him slightly. “You look like hell,” he observed in a hoarse voice. Elliot smiled and shook his head, squatting down to pillow his arms on the bed near Jimmy’s shoulders and propping up his chin. “Pot, meet kettle,” he said. Jimmy’s hand came up unsteadily, and he snagged a bit of Elliot’s hair. He tugged on it gently as he met Elliot’s eyes. “Thanks for staying,” he said hoarsely. In his drugged and weakened state, his accent was much more noticeable and gruff. “Didn’t want you to wake up alone. That happens often enough,” Elliot said softly.
Jimmy closed his eyes and tugged at Elliot’s hair, pulling him just enough that he was able to press his forehead against Elliot’s. “My truck blew up,” he said in a childish, pitiful voice. Elliot inhaled sharply and closed his eyes, and he could see the accident on the television screen. “Yeah,” he whispered. “Danger-prone Daphne.” “Wasn’t my fault,” Jimmy insisted in a small voice. “I know, Firecracker. I saw the accident on TV,” Elliot said. “There’s no way you could have ended up like that on your own.” Jimmy relaxed slightly and rested his head back on his pillow, looking at Elliot with a wince. “It was on TV?” he asked with dread. “Did they show my rig? Is it charred? Can it be fixed? Did they find my hat?” he asked rapidly, the words fading into almost nothing as he went on. Elliot reached out and laid a finger against Jimmy’s lips. “I’m afraid your hat is a goner,” he said apologetically, ignoring the other questions. Jimmy groaned softly, the sound almost a whimper as he closed his eyes. “I love that hat,” he mumbled. Moving to lightly brush his thumb against Jimmy’s cheek, Elliot tilted his head to one side as he watched his lover. “I’d rather have you than the hat,” he said. Jimmy turned his head again and brushed against Elliot’s hand. He opened his mouth to respond, but began coughing weakly, obviously trying not to. When the fit was over, he groaned plaintively and began moving his hand, searching for something at his side. Elliot frowned as his hand fell to the pillow. looking for?”
“What are you
“The clicker,” Jimmy answered roughly. He held up his hand and made a pushing motion with his thumb against his fist. “Morphine clicker.” Elliot stood up to lean over Jimmy – the device had fallen from Jimmy’s hand and caught on the bed casing. He pulled it free and slid it
into Jimmy’s hand. “What’s hurting, besides your chest? The nurse said something about your shoulder being messed up.” “Shoulder’s messed up,” Jimmy answered as he clicked the device repeatedly. “Hey, easy,” Elliot said, catching Jimmy’s hand. “Give it five seconds to kick in, would you? I’ll think you don’t want to talk to me anymore.” “I’d lick you all over if you were made of morphine,” Jimmy told him with a hint of the same mischievous smile Elliot had become accustomed to. Elliot grinned. “And I’d enjoy it,” he murmured, crouching back down and bringing Jimmy’s hand with him, wrapping his own around it. He raised the combined fist to his lips and sighed, letting his eyes shut as some of the fear started melting away. “Hey,” Jimmy whispered distantly as he squeezed Elliot’s fingers. “I think maybe this answers our question.” “What question?” Elliot murmured. “Whether I’m ready to retire,” Jimmy croaked with difficulty. Elliot pulled his eyes open and rubbed his cheek against the back of Jimmy’s hand. He didn’t know what to say for a long moment, and he finally settled on, “You’ll have time to think it over while you get better.” “I love you, Millis,” Jimmy murmured. “I don’t need to think about it anymore than I did in that cab.” “Scared me to death seeing your truck in that accident,” Elliot whispered. “I just found you.” “I’m sorry,” Jimmy whispered. “I love you, Jimmy. I just want you to be safe.” Elliot’s words barely carried beyond his lips as he struggled to control the renewed fear. “I don’t need two arms to go hiking,” Jimmy assured him. “Or watch baseball.” “I’d even take you to a UT football game,” Elliot offered after taking a few deep breaths.
“Give me a kiss,” Jimmy requested softly, “before I need my mask again.” Elliot’s lips quirked and he braced himself on the bed to reach up and press their lips together softly. Jimmy’s finger swept through his hair gently, and he hummed quietly against Elliot’s lips. Then he rested back into his bed and seemed to deflate slightly. He’d had enough activity, apparently, even though he desperately wanted to stay awake. Pulling back, Elliot lifted the mask and settled it back over Jimmy’s mouth, though he hated to hide those lips. “Now that you know I’m here, I’m going down to the cafeteria to get something to eat, okay?” Elliot asked as he straightened and stood up. “I’m about faint with hunger,” he joked. Jimmy responded with a muffled, amused noise and closed his eyes. Elliot smiled and squeezed Jimmy’s hand one last time before heading out to find the cafeteria. He couldn’t make himself stay away very long, even telling himself Jimmy was most likely asleep. So Elliot ate, cleaned up a little in one of the bathrooms and headed back upstairs. He checked the clock as he passed the nurses’ station; forty-five minutes had passed. Turning a corner, Elliot stopped at Jimmy’s door in surprise. There was someone there with him, someone who wasn’t a nurse or doctor. Two tiny little blond girls sat on the end of the bed, watching Jimmy adoringly as he rasped about their pretty braids. A man stood beside the head of the bed, watching Jimmy with a worried, fond smile. “Girls,” the man said as soon as Jimmy looked like he might need more rest, “Go find momma, okay? Right down the hall, you remember?” “Yes, sir,” the twin girls chimed as he picked them up one at a time and placed them carefully on the ground. They scattered off, sliding past Elliot as they looked up at him with big, blue eyes. Elliot watched them scamper by. Jimmy’s girls. His nieces. They were adorable, and they kept looking over their shoulders at him with the same blue eyes Jimmy had. He turned back to look into the room, thinking he should probably find somewhere else to be since Jimmy’s family was here. He could only
assume this man was the girls’ father, meaning he was one of Jimmy’s brothers. And he did favor Jimmy in looks, as well, Elliot decided, a few years down the road, maybe. The man caught sight of Elliot as he watched his daughters leave, and he raised his head slightly. “You looking for James?” he asked in a friendly voice. Jimmy reached up to take his mask off, but his brother grabbed his hand gently to stop him. Jimmy pointed at the door as his hand dangled, and he mumbled against the mask. “Are you Elliot?” the brother asked. Elliot nodded. “I can come back,” he offered. “Don’t be silly,” the man said with a smile as he left Jimmy’s bedside and walked over to Elliot. He took his hand and shook it enthusiastically. “I’m Jeremy, James’s brother,” he offered. “It’s a pleasure to meet you.” Elliot blinked at the warm welcome. “Nice to meet you,” he answered, smiling a little. “I’m sure Jimmy’s glad to see you.” He shifted a bit to one side, betraying his nerves. He hadn’t thought about meeting Jimmy’s family. “James’s told us a lot about you,” Jeremy told him gently. “The girls will be excited to meet you, finally. But I think James is happier to see you than us,” he said with a fond smile as he released Elliot’s hand and stepped to the side. “I’ll just go wrangle up my little ones while you two talk.” Elliot looked even more surprised. Jimmy had told his family about him? “Ah, okay.” He pushed a hand into a pocket. “He talks about the girls. Adores them,” he offered, then smiled a little more genuinely. “Sings to them.” Jeremy laughed and rolled his eyes. “They won’t go to bed without it,” he grumbled as he stepped past Elliot and patted him on the shoulder. After watching him go, Elliot walked over to stand beside Jimmy’s bed. He was sure the surprise was still clear on his face. “Your brother’s… great,” he said. Jimmy nodded and looked up at Elliot over the top of his mask. “And those girls… I can see why you love them so much. They’re gorgeous,” Elliot added.
Jimmy reached up again and dislodged the mask with a huff. “Cinnamon and Sugar,” he told Elliot as soon as the mask was off. Elliot stared at him for a moment. “Huh?” “That’s what I call them,” Jimmy clarified. “Oh.” Elliot nodded. “Yeah, I can see that.” He glanced to the door. “So… you talk to them about me?” Jimmy blinked at him and nodded tentatively. “Is that okay?” he asked in a rough voice. “Yeah!” Elliot said quickly. “I mean, yeah, it’s okay. I guess I hadn’t thought about it,” he said with a shrug. “I don’t have anyone to tell since Alice is gone now.” Jimmy looked up at him with a sad frown for a moment before his lips twitched in a hint of his usual smile. “Jeremy likes baseball,” he replied. Elliot lit up with a smile. “Yeah?” “Yeah,” Jimmy whispered. “Freak,” he muttered as he placed his mask back over his face for a moment. He closed his eyes and inhaled deeply, then pulled it away again. “Give me another kiss,” he demanded. Elliot bit his lip against laughing. “Feeling a little better?” he asked as he stepped up to the head of bed and bent over to kiss Jimmy’s forehead. Jimmy huffed and kicked his heel against the mattress gently. “Give me a real kiss, damn you,” he muttered, even though he was smiling almost like himself again. Elliot grinned and shifted lower to capture Jimmy’s lips gently, lightly tracing them with his tongue before pulling back. “Better?” Jimmy’s eyes were closed, and he was smiling when Elliot pulled back. “Better,” he murmured. “Did you see my hat?” he asked as he forced his eyes open again. “The little ones brought me a new hat,” he said proudly as he pointed to the hook near the bathroom, where a purple and black leopard print cowboy hat hung. Turning to look, Elliot busted out in a full laugh. “Oh, it’s so you,” he complimented.
“They said it matched my bruises,” Jimmy laughed, breaking into a small coughing fit as he did so. It didn’t deter the smile that was placed firmly on his lips, though. Elliot nodded and turned back to him with a sigh. “I’m glad you’re smiling. Won’t be long and you’ll be all healed up.” “Then you can do unseemly things to me again,” Jimmy invited contentedly before placing his mask back over his nose for a moment. “Anything you want,” Elliot promised. “Just you,” Jimmy managed to say under the mask as he met Elliot’s eyes. Elliot nodded slowly. “Just me,” he agreed softly. Jimmy closed his eyes almost against his will, and he made a fluttering motion with his fingers to tell Elliot that he was fading. “You go ahead and rest,” Elliot said, leaning over to kiss Jimmy one more time, at the corner of his eye. “I’ll be here.” When Elliot straightened and turned around, two tiny little blond girls stood behind him, staring up at him with large blue eyes. He took an involuntary step back and was stopped by the edge of the bed. Elliot raised an eyebrow and looked at them before slowly crouching down so he wouldn’t tower over them. Even kneeling, they still had to peer up at him. They stood side by side, holding hands and looking at him unerringly. “Daddy says Uncle Jimmy can’t sing to us no more,” one of them said in a sweet, tiny voice. Elliot blinked at her. “Um. Not for awhile, no.” “Will you call us at night and sing to us?” the other one asked him innocently. “’Til he can sing again?” Elliot’s eyes went really wide. “I’m not a very good singer,” he said awkwardly. The little girl wearing red began chewing on her lip as she looked up at Elliot, and the one in pink blinked at him as if she didn’t understand what that had to do with their bedtime rituals. “Daddy said you’re going to take care of Uncle Jimmy while he’s sick,” the little pink one told him.
“Will you take good care of him?” the little red one asked with a worried furrow of her brow. Elliot glanced up at the bed where Jimmy lay with his eyes closed. “Yeah. I’ll take good care of him,” he promised. Without another word, both of the girls stepped forward and wrapped their arms around Elliot, engulfing him in pigtails from both sides. They laid their heads on each of his shoulders and hugged him. “Now, girls,” their daddy murmured from the doorway where he stood watching. “Don’t pop his head off,” he warned with a small smile. Totally shocked, Elliot kept as still as he could, but carefully lifted his forearms to cross over their backs and gently complete the hug. After receiving their hugs, both of the girls stepped back and gave Elliot’s cheeks a dainty kiss, and then they skipped together over to their daddy. “Can we go get Uncle Elliot a hat, too?” they asked him excitedly. Elliot sat back on his rear with a thump, staring after them, speechless. Jeremy Vaughan patted his daughters on the head and looked up to meet Elliot’s eyes with a slight smile. “Ask Uncle Elliot what color hat he would like,” he told them without looking away from Elliot. It seemed to be his way of telling Elliot that the name was not a mistake. Elliot climbed to his feet and looked back and forth between Jeremy and the girls. He met Jeremy’s eyes and smiled in relief. “Green!” the little girls answered enthusiastically, and Jeremy laughed and ushered them out the door. He stopped and turned to look back at Elliot as the little girls went skipping toward their mother. “James has always been a happy guy,” he said to Elliot. “But anything that makes him happier is all right in my book. If he wakes up, tell him we went to find you a hat,” he said with a wink and smile that was similar to Jimmy’s own. Then he was gone, and the little girls could be heard singing softly as they made their way to the elevator. Elliot stood and watched them go, bemused and more than a little surprised by the quick acceptance of Jimmy’s family. What family Elliot had ever had – besides Alice – hadn’t liked him, much less his
preferences. So this… this was amazing to him. He looked back over to Jimmy and saw the man smirking as he lay in bed, even though his eyes were still closed and his mask was still on. Jimmy reached up and took the mask off just enough to be heard. “Charmer,” he accused fondly without opening his eyes. “You’ll be the favorite before you know it.” Elliot sighed and settled carefully on the edge of the bed, waiting for Jimmy to look at him. “And how did those girls know my favorite color was green?” Jimmy opened his eyes and peered at Elliot with a dulled sparkle in his blue eyes. “I couldn’t say,” he whispered innocently. “Cheesehead.” “Uh huh. Were you listening the whole time? They want me to sing to them!” Elliot sounded scandalized. “They always get what they want,” Jimmy warned. He set his mask on his chest and reached down for Elliot’s hand. “Thanks for being good to them,” he said sincerely, his voice slurring with sleep and morphine. “Hey, if I can love you, McLean, I’ll have no problem loving those little girls,” Elliot teased. Jimmy smiled and closed his eyes. murmured.
“I love you, too,” he
JIMMY looked up at the impossibly blue sky and inhaled deeply. Not too long ago, he hadn’t been able to take a breath like that without falling into a coughing fit. He smiled happily and turned around to look back at the field of boulders he had just traversed to get out to the edge of the mountain. “You coming?” he called with a smile. “I’m used to hauling boxes, not myself!” Elliot said as he pushed himself through the last couple of boulders, muttering. “It’s like hiking with a bear,” Jimmy muttered fondly as he watched Elliot struggle his way to the edge. “You’re not having fun?” he asked in a teasingly hurt voice.
Elliot stopped next to him and grinned, setting his hands on Jimmy’s hips. “Sure I am. It’s an incredible view.” Jimmy grinned and looked into Elliot’s eyes. accused with a smirk.
“Cheesy,” he
“I’m allowed,” Elliot drawled, sliding his hands around to grope “the view.” Jimmy pushed back his hat and kissed Elliot soundly as the gentle breeze picked up. “Want to set up camp?” he asked suggestively. “Hmmmm, I don’t know….” Elliot said mock-reluctantly. “Still got quite a bit of sunlight yet. We could get another mile up into the mountains.” Meanwhile, Elliot was closing his arms tight around his lover. “Yeah, but we could also zip ourselves up and fuck like rabbits as soon as the sun goes down,” Jimmy argued seriously. “And I’ll be needing food before we do that. And some Advil.” Elliot hummed in agreement and lowered his mouth to the sensitive spot along Jimmy’s jaw. “Yeah, I could go for that. Not like we’re in a hurry.” His hands slid lower. Jimmy laughed, and the sound echoed down the lush canyon below them. After months of rehab and Elliot tying up his loose ends, they had both managed to settle in with each other with no responsibilities between them. Less than a week after Jimmy had been given a completely clean bill of health, he dragged Elliot out onto the Appalachian Trail. The only thing he regretted was not realizing how much the hard ground would hurt his newly reconstructed shoulder. It didn’t matter, though. He had Elliot all to himself and nowhere to be for quite a long time. And he could breathe. “You know, Boy Scout troops come through here a lot,” he murmured drolly as Elliot nibbled on him. Elliot snorted. “They could use the education,” he murmured as he slid his lips down the column of Jimmy’s neck. “More likely the bears will get a peep show.” Jimmy hummed and laughed. “Come on, tiger,” he drawled as he pulled away from Elliot and took his hand. “We’ll go scandalize the wildlife.”
“Pick somewhere soft for us to sleep, huh? My back’s killing me,” Elliot said lightly, though he was watching Jimmy from behind the whole time. And this time, not his behind. He knew how much his lover’s shoulder was hurting him. And still, Jimmy insisted on carrying his own pack. Rules of the Trail, he had claimed. “Quit worrying and move your ass, Millis,” Jimmy shot over his shoulder as he clambered deftly over the boulder field. Elliot smiled, resettled the garish green and pink ball cap on his head, and got moving again. “Hey, don’t forget it’s your turn to sing to the girls tonight.” “I can do that while you’re getting naked,” Jimmy called gleefully as he disappeared behind the largest boulder and waved his hat back at Elliot to hasten his pace. “Sugar said she wanted the ‘Sweet Pea’ song again,” Elliot added as he stretched his legs to catch up. “God knows she knows the dang song by heart.” “Pushover!” Jimmy called, even farther away than he had been before. Muttering, Elliot hurried. He didn’t want Jimmy to get too far ahead, just in case. “You’re just jealous!” he called out. Those girls had sunk their claws into Elliot, and he’d never thought even once about trying to get loose. Jimmy was tickled pink, he knew. It didn’t take long for Elliot to catch up to Jimmy, and when he did Jimmy wrapped his arms around him and kissed him to within an inch of his life. “Stop talking,” he murmured. “Whatever you say, McLean,” Elliot mumbled after he finally got his breath back. He had his arms curved around Jimmy’s waist, and as far as he was concerned, the rest of the world could go to hell and leave them alone. Jimmy gave him a small kiss and smirked. “Good boy,” he cooed. “Now. Take me to bed!” he ordered haughtily. “Where’s the bed?” Elliot asked in amusement. “How about I just lay you down and make love to you until you scream loud enough to scare the birds?”
“Works for me,” Jimmy drawled after a moment of thought. He took Elliot’s face in his hands and looked at him, suddenly serious. “You’re a good thing, Millis,” he said softly. Moments like these made it all worth it, Elliot thought. Not that “all” was all that much to deal with, like a hike in the mountains. Hell. If it would make Jimmy smile he’d move the dang mountains. “I love you, Jimmy,” Elliot murmured. Jimmy hummed and smiled. “I know,” he said contentedly.
Madeleine Urban is a down-home Kentucky girl who's been writing since she could hold a crayon. A longtime science fiction and fantasy fan, she loves to mix those genres with romance to get explosive, satisfying results. She lives with a partner and two canine kids, visits Disney World twice a year, and still believes dreams can come true. Visit Madeleine’s Blog at http://madeleineurban.livejournal.com
a Abigail Roux is a whimsical girl who likes her beer cold and her sex hot. A past volleyball star and current rabid Braves fan, Abigail has a husband, one dog, six cats, a crazyass family, and a cast of thousands in her head. Her stories often feature love, lust and manly men. Visit Abigail’s Blog at http://abigail-roux.insanejournal.com/
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