Методические указания по практике устной и письменной речи английского языкадля студентов 1 курса факультета филологии и журналистики (специальность романо-германская филология). Problems of modern families and children up-bringing

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Госкомитет Российской Федерации по высшему образованию РОСТОВСКИЙ ГОСУДАРСТВЕННЫЙ УНИВЕРСИТЕТ

МЕТОДИЧЕСКИЕ УКАЗАНИЯ ПО ПРАКТИКЕ УСТНОЙ И ПИСЬМЕННОЙ РЕЧИ АНГЛИЙСКОГО ЯЗЫКА

для студентов 1 курса факультета филологии и журналистики (специальность романо-германская филология)

Ростов-на-Дону 2003

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Методические указания обсуждены и утверждены на заседании кафедры романо-германской филологии факультета филологии и журналистики Ростовского государственного университета. Протокол № ___ от _______________2003 Составили: Л.А. Нехлюдова, ст. преподаватель. Ответственный редактор: К. Ю. Колесина, канд. пед. наук, доцент.

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Настоящие методические указания отвечают основным целям обучения на 1 курсе отделений и факультетов иностранных языков и направлены на овладение, развитие и совершенствование профессиональных умений и навыков устной и письменной речи студентов в процессе их работы в аудитории под руководством преподавателя и самостоятельной работы. Предлагаемые тексты и задания способствуют обогащению словарного запаса студентов, приобщению студентов к самостоятельной научно-исследовательской работе над языком и развивают у них аналитический подход к изучаемым языковым явлениям. Указания составлены с учетом поаспектного обучения языку и предназначены для занятий по практике устной и письменной речи английского языка, что и определило их структуру и содержание отдельных разделов. Методические указания отвечают основным дидактическим и методическим принципам обучения и состоят из 3 разделов, приложения, списка использованной литературы и списка аудиоматериалов. Первые 2 раздела, «Проблемы современной семьи. Помолвка и брак», «Воспитание детей. Проблемы отцов и детей», содержат вокабуляр по данным подтемам, тексты, упражнения, диалоги и материалы по аудированию. Тематический вокабуляр включает слова и словосочетания, как подлежащие активному усвоению, так и не входящие в активный словарь, но нуждающиеся в пояснении. Предлагаемые для изучения тексты служат цели отработки учебно-познавательной темы и являются источником политических, художественных и литературоведческих знаний. В этих разделах также включен материал страноведческого характера, знакомящий студентов с проблемами семьи и воспитания детей, традициями заключения помолвки и брака в странах изучаемого языка (Великобритания, США). Упражнения устной речевой направленности способствуют более глубокому проникновению в структуру и содержание текста, обращают внимание студентов на различия средств и способов формирования и формулирования мысли в русском и английском языках. В каждом разделе также имеется ряд так называемых “Activation Exercises”, целью которых является закрепление полезного лексический материала. Данный тип упражнений включает как языковые, так и условно-речевые и речевые упражнения, многие из которых имеют коммуникативную направленность. Делается акцент на умение студентов понять и передать определенную информацию, используя необходимый лексический материал, стимулировать построение устного связного, последовательного и логически-стройного высказывания. Система упражнений по письменной практике предусматривает самостоятельную отработку норм современного английского языка, подготовку студентов к написанию изложений и сочинений. Большое количество упражнений и текстов создает возможность для дифференциации и индивидуализации обучения, а также для организации самостоятельной работы студентов. 3-ий раздел указаний содержит ряд упражнений и заданий коммуникативной направленности, предусматривающих групповую работу, основной целью которой является контроль знаний усвоенных студентами при изучении данной темы в ходе групповой дискуссии. В этом разделе также предложен список разговорных тем, рекомендованных для вынесения на экзамен по практике английского языка. В приложении предлагается ряд текстов о древнерусских традициях и обычаях, связанных с помолвкой и заключением брака, а также текст об индийской семье и информация познавательного характера об особенностях семейной жизни в разных странах мира. К каждому тексту предлагаются упражнения на усвоение лексического материала и другие задания. Данные тексты могут быть использованы как во время аудиторных занятий по практике устной речи английского языка, так и в качестве заданий для самостоятельной работы студентов. В приложении также предлагается ряд дополнительных упражнений направленных на совершенствование навыков чтения и развитие умения выделить основную идею текста и передать его краткое содержание. Данные упражнения (“Problem Page”), затрагивающие проблемы воспитания детей и конфликтные ситуации, возникающие в семье, могут также быть использованы в качестве стимула к групповой дискуссии.

3 VOCABULARY

Study the following words and word combinations. 1. engagement, betrothal • old folks at home • to be engaged • father, dad • to be betrothed • mother, mum • to be plighted lovers 26. children 2. wedding • son, daughter 3. bride, fiancée • senior son (daughter) 4. bridegroom, fiancé • junior son 5. matrimony • eldest daughter 6. marriage • youngest daughter • to get married 27. full brother (sister) • to marry smb. 28. siblings ¾ for love • brother ¾ for money • sister • to be married to smb. 29. ancestors • to be married in a 30. grandparents religious rite • grandfather (grand-papa, • to be married in a civil grandpa, grand-dad) form of marriage (civil • grandmother (grandmarriage) mamma, grandma, 7. registry office granny) 8. a newly-married couple 31. great-grandparents 9. a love match • great grandfather 10. a misalliance • great grandmother 11. a marriage of convenience 32. descendants 12. marriage certificate (marriage 33. grandchildren lines) • grandson 13. to carry marriage seriously • granddaughter (lightly) 34. great grandchildren 14. wedding ring • great grandson 15. engagement ring • great granddaughter 16. honeymoon 35. relatives 17. conjugal ties • distant relatives 18. conjugal union • close relatives on my 19. matron of honour/bridesmaid mother’s/father’s side 20. best man 36. to have relations to smb. 21. pageboy 37. to be related to smb. 22. a couple • by birth 23. spouse • by affinity • husband 38. first cousin • wife 39. second cousin, etc. 24. family 40. uncle • a nuclear family 41. aunt, auntie • a single-parent family 42. niece • a blended family 43. nephew • an empty-nest family 44. to remarry • an extended family 45. step-father (mother) • a consensual union 46. step-children (step• a same-sex union son/daughter) 25. parents

47. step-brother (sister) 48. half-brother (sister) 49. adoption • to adopt an orphan 50. paternity of the child is unknown 51. foster-brother/sister 52. foster child 53. foster-father (mother) 54. father (mother)-in-law 55. twins (twinbrothers/sisters) 56. triplets 57. in-laws • son (daughter)-in-law • sister (brother)-in-law • father-in-law • mother-in-law 58. godchild • godson/goddaughter 59. godparents • godfather/mother 60. a widow (grass widow) 61. spinster 62. an expectant mother 63. widower 64. bachelor 65. she has five children each smaller than the last 66. rising generation 67. he is a pet-model 68. toddlers (tiny tots) 69. polygamy • polygyny • polyandry 70. fictive kin 71. to raise (to bear) children 72. to divorce, to get a divorce • a divorcée 73. trial separation 74. incompatibility 75. adultery 76. alimony 77. maintenance 78. divorce court 79. to dissolve/annul marriage 80. to award a decree nisi

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Read and translate the introductory text. A Family Marriage is a thing which only a rare person in his or her life avoids. True bachelors and spinsters make up only a small percent of the population; most single people are “alone but not lonely”. Millions of others get married because of the fun of family life. And it is fun, if one takes a sense of humour. There is a lot of fun in falling in love with someone and chasing the prospective fiancée, which means dating and going out with the candidate. All the relatives (parents, grandparents and great-grand-parents, brothers and sisters, cousins, aunts and uncles, nieces and nephews, stepmothers and stepfathers and all in-laws) meanwhile have the fun of criticizing your choice and giving advice. The trick here is not to listen to them but propose to your bride-to-be and somehow get her to accept your proposal. Then you may arrange the engagement and fix the day of the wedding. What fun it is to get all those things, whose names start with the word “wedding” – dress, ring, cars, flowers, cakes, etc.! It’s great fun to pay for them. It’s fun for the bride and the groom to escape from the guests and go on a honeymoon trip, especially if it is a wedding present from the parents. The guests remain with the fun of gossiping whether you married for love or for money. It’s fun to return back home with the idea that the person you are married to is somewhat different from the one you knew. But there is no time to think about it because you are newly-weds and you expect a baby. There is no better fun for a husband than taking his wife to a maternity home alone and bringing her back with the twins or triplets. And this is where the greatest fun starts: washing the new-born’s nappies and passing away sleepless nights, earning money to keep the family, taking children to kindergarten and later to school. By all means it’s fun to attend parent’s meeting and to learn that your children take after you and don’t do well at school. The bigger your children grow, the more they resemble you outwardly and the less they display likeness with you inwardly. And you start grumbling at them and discussing with your old friends the problem of the “generation gap”. What fun! And when at last you and your grey-haired spouse start thinking that your family life has calmed down, you haven’t divorced but preserved your union, the climax of your fun bursts out! One of your dearest off-springs brings a long-legged blonde to your house and says that he wants to marry. And you think: ‘Why do people ever get married?’ P A R T 1 Engagement and Marriage. Challenges and Opportunities. Exercise 1. BRAIN TEASER Try this little brain-teaser. Note the names we give to the various members of our family. Each of the fourteen people below is married to one of the others. From the information you are given, find out who is married to whom. Note there are three generations here.

Helen is Barbara’s mother-in-law and Larry’s Alan is Caroline’s nephew and Larry’s cousin. grandmother. Barbara is Larry’s mother and Maggie’s sisterIngrid is Gordon’s niece and David’s daughterin-law. in-law. Caroline is Edward’s daughter and Maggie’s John is David’s father and Gordon’s father-insister-in-law. law. David is Gordon’s brother-in-law and Alan’s Karen is Gordon’s daughter-in-law and Maggie’s uncle. daughter-in-law. Edward is Ingrid’s grandfather and Maggie’s Larry is John’s grandson and David’s son. father-in-law. Maggie is Larry’s aunt and Fanny’s daughterFanny is Caroline’s mother and Alan’s in-law. grandmother. Nigel is Ingrid’s father and Fanny’s son-in-law Gordon is Helen’s son-in-law and Nigel’s brother-in-law. Exercise 2. Fill in suitable words: 1. Your aunt’s son is your … . 2. Your father’s father is your … . 3. My sister’s son is my … . 4.

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His sister’s daughter is his … . 5. My mother’s brother is my … . 6. Your mother’s sister is your … . 7. Your father’s brother is your … . 8. Your uncle’s daughter is your … . 9. Your brother’s wife is your … . 10. Your sister’s husband is your … . 11. Your husband’s mother is your … . 12. Your mother’s mother is your … . Exercise 3. Choose the most suitable word or phrase to complete the sentence below. 1. Mrs Jones had … . a. trio b. a treble c. triplets 2. Mrs Vine had had … the week before. a. quarts b. quads c. a quartet 3. Twins often seem to … a generation. a. hop b. skip c. jump 4. There was a case of … twins in our town recently. a. Japanese b. Chinese c. Siamese 5. There’s a … of twins in our family – on my father’s … . a. story b. geography c. history d. tree e. side f. line 6. I was … child, though. a. an only b. a missing c. a single 7. All the members of our football team are related … marriage. a. by b. to c. on 8. When Mother remarried, her second husband, my …, gave me a new bicycle. a. forefather b. stepfather c. grandfather 9. He said to me, ‘Look, I know you’re not my own …, but let’s be friends.’ a. flesh and blood b. blood and guts c. skin and bones 10. My … originated from a tribe of Red Indians. a. ancestors b. ancients c. antiques 11. Not many of my own … relatives are still alive. a. blood b. skin c. heart 12. My … -grandfather fought at the Battle of Waterloo. a. grand grand grand b. great grand grand c. great-great-great 13. My brother-in-law inherited £500,000 in his uncle’s … . a. will b. testament c. wishes 14. I was left £50 and a cat by … relative; I believe it was a … cousin – or perhaps it was a … aunt. a. a distant b. an unclear c. a long-distance d. double e. second f. dual g. grand h. great i. large 15. Peter is an orphan; he was … at the age of two. a. adjusted b. adapted c. adopted 16. Paul comes from a broken home; he has lived with a number of … parents. a. loan b. foster c. second-hand 17. Mary was from a single-parent family; now she’s looked after by her … . a. keeper b. warden c. guardian 18. I’m off to have Sunday lunch with my new … now. a. outlaws b. by-laws c. in-laws Exercise 4. Read and translate the following text. Answer the questions after the text. Family is the basic unit of social organization in all human societies. Since prehistoric times, families have served as the primary institution responsible for raising children, providing people with food and shelter, and satisfying people’s need for love and support. The term family generally refers to a group of people related to one another by birth, marriage, or adoption. In contemporary society, people often apply the word family to any group that feels a sense of kinship (family connection). Family types vary in different countries and among different cultures. In Western, industrialized

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societies, the nuclear family ranks as the most common family type. It consists of a father, a mother, and their children. But nuclear families exist alongside many other types of family units. In the singleparent family, for example, a mother or a father heads the family alone. A blended family is formed when a divorced or widowed parent remarries. As divorce rates have risen, the number of singleparent and blended families has increased. An increasingly common family form in Western societies is the consensual union, in which couples live together but remain unmarried. When a homosexual couple decides to live together as a family, they form a same-sex union. Although such unions have become more common, most countries do not recognize them as legal families. People often call a married couple whose children have grown up and left home an empty-nest family. In many parts of the world, parents and children live together with other family members under the same roof. These complex families usually contain several generations of family members, including grandparents, parents, and children. They may also include brothers or sisters and their families, uncles, aunts, and cousins. Even when relatives do not live together, they still consider themselves members of the same extended family. In Latin American and Hispanic American cultures, the extended family, or la familia, includes grandparents, uncles, aunts, and cousins. Some cultures follow a traditional practice called polygamy, in which a person can have more than one spouse (husband or wife). The two chief forms of polygamy are polygyny and polyandry. In polygyny, a man marries more than one woman. In polyandry, a woman has more than one husband. Family members can be related to one another by blood – that is, by birth; by affinity – that is, through marriage; or through adoption. Most nuclear families consist of a father, a mother, and their biological children (children born to them). When a couple adopts a child, the child becomes a member of their family. Brothers and sisters who share the same parents are siblings. Half brothers and half sisters share either the same biological mother or biological father. When divorced or widowed parents remarry, the parent’s new spouse becomes the children’s stepfather or stepmother. Children from the couple’s previous marriages become stepbrothers and stepsisters to one another. When people marry, they gain a new set of relatives called in-laws. The mother of a person’s spouse is called a mother-in-law, the brother is called a brother-in-law, and so on throughout the rest of the family. The parents of a person’s mother or father are that person’s grandparents. Great-grandparents are the parents of a person’s grandparents. An aunt is the sister of a person’s mother or father. An uncle is the brother of a parent. An uncle’s wife is also called aunt, and an aunt’s husband is also called uncle. A first cousin is the child of a person’s aunt or uncle. The child of a first cousin is a person’s first cousin once removed – that is, removed by one generation. Children of first cousins are second cousins to each other. Some people consider certain friends as part of their family because they feel special affection for them. Though these friends are not true family members, such friends are called fictive kin, and family members might call them “aunts” or “uncles”. Relatives or close friends of a parent may become godparents to that parent’s children. Godparents, as sponsors to a Christian baptism, often play more vital roles in the lives of families than other fictive kin. In Latin American and Hispanic American families, godparents, or compadres, provide advice, emotional support, and assistance in times of need. Families perform many necessary functions, both for individual family members and for society as a whole. In virtually all cultures, the family serves as the basic institution for bearing children, caring for them during their early years, and preparing them to function effectively in society. Families around the world must also provide food and clothing to their members. In addition, families meet important psychological needs, such as the need for love, support, and companionship. The family’s duties have changed over time. In the past, families not only cared for the young but also grew their own food, made their own clothing, and provided services for themselves that modern families generally do not provide. Parents taught reading, writing, and craft skills to their children. Families also cared for sick and elderly relatives and often provided financial support for

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members in need. Since the 1800’s, many of these traditional responsibilities have shifted to such institutions as schools, hospitals, insurance companies, and nursing homes. Roles within the family have also changed. Traditionally, the father was expected to take up an occupation to support his wife and children. The mother, in turn, ran the home and cared for the children. Today, however, both parents commonly work outside the home, and fathers often perform household duties formerly expected of women. The home is the center of family activities. These activities include raising children, eating meals, playing games, watching television, keeping house, and entertaining friends. In the home, children learn basic social skills, such as how to talk and get along with others. They also learn health and safety habits there. A family’s home life is influenced by which members live in the home and by the roles each member plays. Home life can also be affected by relatives who live outside the family’s home. Traditions, laws, and social conditions help determine who lives in a home and the place each family member holds. Traditions, which are customs or beliefs that people have followed for a long time, strongly influence family life. For example, some Americans have little contact with relatives outside the nuclear family. But many Chinese families feel strong ties to such relatives and see them often. Aunts, uncles, and cousins traditionally play important roles in the lives of these people. Laws affect family behavior in various ways. Some set forth the legal rights and responsibilities people have as husbands, wives, parents, and children. In many Western nations, laws forbid abuse of children by parents, and of one spouse by the other. Laws also deal with marriage, divorce, and adoption. Social conditions can also influence family life. For example, in cultures that discourage women from working outside the home, mothers become full-time homemakers, while men act as the sole wage earners. (Steven Mintz, Ph.D., Associate Professor of History, University of Houston.) Questions:

1. What is the role of the family in modern society? 2. What responsibilities do parents have toward their children? 3. How many different types of family do you know? 4. What is a nuclear family (single-parent family, blended family, consensual union, same-sex union, empty-nest family, extended family)? 5. In what countries does an extended family type still predominate? What type of family is the most characteristic one for your country? 6. What is the difference between polygyny and polyandry? 7. What cultures follow polygamy? 8. How can family members be related to one another? 9. What is the difference between siblings and half-brothers or sisters? 10. How are second cousins related to each other? 11. Who are in-laws? 12. Whom do we call fictive kin? 13. What are the functions the family fulfills in society? 14. How have these functions changed over time? 15. How have traditional family roles changed? 16. What laws regulate relations within a family? Exercise 5. Find in the text equivalents to the following words and word combinations. 1. a structure or building that provides cover from weather or protection against danger; 2. legal procedure for taking a child into the family from an orphanage; 3. two people who are married, are living together; 4. somebody’s husband or wife; 5. the custom of having more than one spouse at the same time; 6. a relative by marriage; 7. somebody who is named as a sponsor when a child is baptized; 8. skill in making or doing things, especially by hand; 9. the people who live together in a single home; 10. the ending of a marriage by an official decision in a court of law; 11. the only one. Exercise 6. Work with a partner. Ask him/her the following questions and make a note of his/her answers. QUESTIONS

How many children, including you, are there in your family? Are you the oldest child, the youngest child, or somewhere in the middle? What is the age difference between the oldest child and the youngest?

ANSWERS

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What do you think is an ideal number of children to have in a family? What is an advantage of your position in the family? What is a disadvantage of your position in the family? Look at the answers that you got from your partner and compare them with the answers he/she got from you. How many of your answers are the same? How similar are your families? Exercise 7. Now listen to a grandmother talking with one of her grandchildren. Listening 1 Before listening look through the tasks given below. A. Mark in the boxes whether the following statements are true or false. TRUE

FALSE

1. The grandmother is not very old. 2. She has a lot of grandchildren and some great-grandchildren. 3. Her grandchildren live near her. 4. She is still active. 5. She likes to travel. B. Her grandchildren live in various places. Underline the places mentioned. France

Alaska

Texas

California

Japan

C. Complete these sentences. 1. There are two main topics in the conversation ______________and _____________. 2. One reason the grandmother can’t remember the names of her children and great-grandchildren is because _______________________________________________. 3. The grandmother is very active. She wants to ______________________________. Exercise 8. Try to make a list of all the members of your family: cousins, aunts, uncles, etc. Compare your list with your partner’s. Tell your group-mates about your family and your distant and close relatives both on your father’s and your mother’s sides. Exercise 9. A high school teacher in Oregon has developed an unusual course for helping people make intelligent decisions about marriage. Read the following text to see how you feel about Mr. Allen’s “Conjugal Preparation”. The bridegroom dressed in a blue blazer and brown Adidas sneakers, nervously cleared his throat when his bride in traditional white, walked down the classroom aisle. As the mock minister led the students – and ten other couples in the room through familiar marriage ceremony, the giggles almost drowned him out. But it was no laughing matter. In the next semester, each couple would buy a house, have a baby and get a divorce. In a most unusual course at Parkrose (Oreg.) Senior High School, social science teacher Cliff Alien leads his students through the trials of married life. Young marrieds must face the “nitty-gritty” problems of housing insurance and child-care. Students act out in nine weeks what normally takes couples ten years to accomplish. In the first week each couple is required to get an after-school job – a real one. The third week the couple locate in an apartment they can afford. In the fifth week the couple “have a baby” and then compute the cost of hospital and doctor bills, baby clothes and furniture. In week eight disaster strikes: the marrieds have a calamity like mother-inlaw’s moving in, death or imprisonment. It is all over by week nine (the tenth year of marriage). After lectures by marriage councillors and divorce lawyers and computations of alimony and child support, the students get divorced. Exercise 10. Say it in another way. a man just married or about to be married; a woman just married or about to be married; false (imitation); a set of formal acts proper to a special occasion (marriage); painful experience, an instance of trouble or hardship, especially one that tests somebody’s ability to endure; concerning or involving

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the most important aspects of a subject; a great misfortune; an adviser; money a judge orders paid to a woman by her legally separated or divorced husband. Exercise 11. Use each of the following word combinations in sentences of your on. ceremony; to get a divorce; to lead through trials; housing insurance; financial problems; an after school job; mother-in-law; imprisonment; bill; care; councillor; alimony. Exercise 12. Answer the following questions 1. What are the “nitty-gritty” problems that Alien’s students must face during the course? 2. How long are the couples “married”? 3. How long does the course last? 4. What are some of the events of married life that the students “experience”? 5. What are the examples of the disasters that strike couples in the eighth week of the course? 6. How does the course affect the marriage plans of some students? 7. Do you think young people in your country should be required to take such a course? Exercise 13. Translate the text into Russian: At Bishop O’Dowd High School we have a course “Marriage and the Family”. I obviously believe that all three institutions (family, school, church) should prepare people for marriage. Statistics on divorce, abortion, child-abuse and wife-battering indicate we are not doing a good enough job preparing people for marriage and child-rearing. In addition to the situations created by Mr. Alien’s Course, Bishop O’Dowd students are required to study the following topics: 1) Premarital Sex; 2) Birth Control; 3) Abortion; 4) RapeSexual Assault; 5) Homosexuality; 6) Child-rearing Attitudes; 7) Communication; 8) Pregnancy; 9) Biology of Sex and Reproduction; 10) Extended families; 11) Extra-marital Relations. The purpose of these studies is not to “convert” the students, but inform them of various relations related to family, and to challenge the student to clarify their values and attitudes about these topics. The material is often controversial and arouses complaints by parents. Still it is important part of our curriculum. (Meg Gorstky) Exercise 14. Listen to one woman talk about her childhood. Before listening look through the tasks given below. Listening 2 A. Number the topics 1-3 in the order in which the woman talks about them. Summer vacation

Fighting with her brother

Chores at home

B. Say whether the following statements are true or false. TRUE

FALSE

1. There were five people in the family. 2. All the family members helped out at home. 3. The children sometimes fought. 4. The girls did their brother’s work for him. 5. The family went away every summer to Canada. 6. They enjoyed outdoor sports together. C. Answer the questions. 1. What two chores does the woman mention? 2. What four sports does she mention? Exercise 15. There are two stories below, one about marriage, and one about divorce. Start in the middle column, which both stories have in common. Then read and translate each story. When you have finished, cover the left-hand and right-hand columns in turn and try to remember the marital expressions. For the six months of our engagement, we trial separation, I seemed blissfully happy, so we I

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decided to go ahead and get married.

get a divorce. There were lots of decisions to make: whether to sue on the grounds of incompatibility or his cruelty or his adultery. I

have a civil marriage in a registry office or marry in church and have a white wedding. We finally decided on the latter. After that, it was mainly a question (I thought) of where to have the reception and where to go on our honeymoon.

how much alimony he should pay and how much maintenance for the children. The night before I spent hours recalling our anniversaries and going through correspondence with my solicitor.

he had a stag party organized by his best man while I had a hen party with some girlfriends. When we arrived at the church,

divorce court we made a strange trio, I must say: me as

the bride,

the plaintiff, Richard as

the (bride-) groom

the respondent, and my little sister as

my bridesmaid. The vicar (priest)

the co-respondent. The judge (magistrate) had a lot to say and

the service

the case took ages. ‘I hereby dissolve’ – or did he say ‘annul’? – this marriage ... and award a decree nisi to …’

‘Gwendolyn Mary, do you take this man, Richard Percy, in holy matrimony, to …? My father

was in court with me,

gave me away, and cried. It seemed very strange for a few days to say, ‘I’m a married woman.’

‘I’m not a divorcée, but I will be in six weeks’ time when I get a decree absolute.

But I never regretted it. Well, … Exercise 16. In the texts and exercises above find equivalents to the following words and word combinations. А. старая дева; влюбиться; невеста (2); холостяк; встречаться с кем-либо (назначать свидания); жених (2); сделать предложение; свадьба; медовый месяц; принять предложение; новобрачные; выйти замуж по любви/по расчету; роддом; ждать ребенка; двойня; тройня; подгузники для новорожденного; детский сад; посещать родительские собрания; ворчать; “проблемы отцов и детей”; развестись; отпрыски. В. воспитывать детей; удочерить/усыновить ребенка; неполная семья (в которой есть

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только один из родителей); нуклеарная/малая семья (состоящая из родителей и детей); смешанная семья (состоящая из родителей и детей от разных браков); вдова; вдовец; повторно жениться или выйти замуж; совместное проживание (без заключения брака); большая/расширенная семья (включающая кроме родителей и детей еще и ближайших родственников); многомужие; многоженство; родня мужа или жены (2); дети одних родителей; супруг/супруга. С. получить развод; испытания семейной жизни; получит развод; страхование жилья; жестокое обращение с детьми; контроль рождаемости; обязанности по дому; помолвка; загс; мальчишник; девичник; раздельное проживание супругов по решению суда; несовместимость; супружеская неверность; сумма, выплачиваемая жене после развода; адвокат; истец; ответчик; расторгнуть брак (2); условно-окончательное решение суда; окончательное решение суда; человек состоящий в разводе. Exercise 17. Write a short summary on one of the following topics: 1. A high school course to prepare young people for marriage. 2. Possible topics for “Conjugal Prep” Course. 3. The “Conjugal Prep” Course is valuable. Exercise 18. Work with the dictionary and find the meaning of the following words and word combinations, practise the pronunciation. to date; to become betrothed; consent; pledge; faith; token; fiancée; fiancé; marriage portion; wedding-dower; to maintain; clergy; priest; rabbi; usher; aisle; altar; fertility; fruitful; ritual; to ward off; evil; eligible; purity; taboos; veil; omen; chimney sweep; relic; soot; confetti; obstacle; to impede; to toss; bouquet; garter; Protestant; Catholic; Mass; Holly Communion; sacrament; Orthodox; Jewish; canopy; Jerusalem; Mormon; Quaker; eternity; superstition. Exercise 19. Read and translate the following text. Engagement and Marriage. Wedding Superstitions

In India and many other countries, most marriages are arranged by parents, deciding whom their children will marry. But in European countries, including the United States and Canada, nearly everyone makes his or her own decision about whom and when to marry. Before people marry, they date members of the opposite sex. A man and woman who date each other spend a great deal of time together learning to know the other person. After they have dated over time, they may find that they love each other and decide to become engaged. At the age of 21 in England or at the age of 18 in some other countries, persons of both sexes come of age. Boys and girls are permitted to become “engaged” or betrothed, when still in their “teens”. A boy can, with his parents’ consent, propose to a girl and then marry her before he is twentyone years of age. As a pledge of good faith he presents his bride-elect with an engagement ring, which is worn on the third finger of the left hand. The use of a ring as an engagement token comes from the ancient custom of using a ring to seal an important agreement. In ordinary speech, a man who is engaged, but not yet married to a lady, when speaking about her, will say: “My intended”, or “My fiancée”. The young lady, on a same occasion, will say the same. Generally, modern girls receive no marriage portion (wedding-dower) on marrying, as a man is obliged to maintain his wife and children himself. Most wedding ceremonies involve two requirements. First, the man and woman must say that they want to become husband and wife. Second, the ceremony must have witnesses, including the official who marries the couple. If the couple have a religious ceremony, it is conducted by a member of the clergy, such as a minister, priest, or rabbi. If a couple are married in a civil (nonreligious) ceremony, a judge or some other authorized official performs it. During the days of long sea voyages, the captain of a ship is authorized to conduct a marriage ceremony while the ship is at sea. Many couples prefer a traditional religious ceremony, though some people depart from custom. Some even write their own wedding service. A traditional marriage ceremony in Britain or the USA begins with the bridesmaids and ushers walking slowly down a center aisle to the altar. They stand on each side of the altar throughout the

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ceremony. The groom enters and waits for the bride at the altar. The bride then walks down the aisle with her father, another male relative, or a family friend. She wears a white dress and veil and carries a bouquet. At the altar, the bride and groom exchange marriage vows and accept each other as husband and wife. The groom puts a wedding ring on the ring finger of the bride’s left hand, and the bride may also give the groom a ring. This ring she wears for the rest of her life. After the ceremony, the bride and groom kiss and then leave down the main aisle. When the ceremony is over, all go back to the house, where the lady has been living, to the wedding party. The prominent feature of the wedding party is the highly-decorated wedding-cake, whose richness symbolizes fertility, just as it has done since Roman times. Today, the first slice is cut by the bride to ensure a fruitful marriage. After the guests have drunk the bride’s and bridegroom’s health, the happy newly-married couple take leave and depart on their honeymoon or to their new home. In England the wedding preparations, ceremony and fest have all become loaded with ritual practices to ward off evil and bless the marriage with fortune and fertility. The choice of date is important. May is traditionally unlucky for weddings. The tradition that the bride’s parents should pay for the wedding dates from two or three centuries ago, when wealthy families would pay an eligible bachelor to take an unmarried daughter off their hands in exchange for a large dowry. At most formal weddings, brides still get married in virginal white – many other colours are considered unlucky. A bride will also ensure that her wedding outfit includes “something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue”. “Old” maintains her link with the past; “new” symbolizes the future; “borrowed” gives her a link with the present; and “blue” symbolizes her purity. Even a modern bride will observe the taboos about wearing her dress before the ceremony. The groom mustn’t see her in it until she enters the church. The veil should be put on for the first time as she lives for the church. It’s a lucky omen if the bride should see a chimney sweep on her way to church. Sometimes a sweep is paid to attend the ceremony and kiss the bride – a relic of the idea that soot and ashes are symbols of fertility. After the ceremony, the couple are showered with confetti. At many weddings, the guests throw rice at the bride and groom as a wish for children and good fortune. Rice was once a symbol of fertility, happiness, and long life. One old custom was for the bride and sometimes the groom to negotiate some obstacles as they left the church – guests would impede them with ropes of flowers, for example, or with sticks that had to be jumped over. The bride may toss her bouquet to the unmarried female guests. The woman who catches the flowers will supposedly be the next to marry. The bride may also throw her garter to the unmarried men. The man who catches it will supposedly be the next male to marry. Marriage is an important religious ceremony in many of the world’s religions. Certain religious groups add their own features to the traditional wedding ceremony. For example, different Protestant groups have their own versions of the ceremony. Many Roman Catholic weddings take place during a Mass, and the bride and groom receive Holy Communion. Marriage is a sacrament (important religious ceremony) in the Roman Catholic and Eastern Orthodox churches. Most Jewish weddings are held under a special canopy that represents the couple’s future home. At the end of the ceremony, an empty glass or other breakable object is placed on the floor and the groom breaks it with his foot. This act symbolizes the destruction of the ancient Jewish Temple in Jerusalem and reminds the couple that a marriage can also break if it is not protected. Mormon weddings are held privately in Mormon temples. Only church members in good standing can attend these ceremonies. Mormons believe that marriage and family life continue after death. A Quaker man and woman marry at a public gathering where they declare their commitment to each other. Quakers believe that God makes a couple husband and wife, and so a minister or other official is not required. Many wedding customs have been popular since ancient times. For example, Roman brides probably wore veils more than 2,000 years ago. Bridal veils became popular in the United Kingdom and the New World during the late 1700’s. The custom of giving a wedding ring dates back to the ancient Romans. The roundness of the ring probably represents eternity, and the presentation of

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wedding rings symbolizes that the man and woman are united forever. Wearing the wedding ring on the ring finger of the left hand is another old custom. People once thought that a vein or nerve ran directly from this finger to the heart. An old superstition says that it is bad luck for a bride and groom to see each other before the ceremony on their wedding day. Exercise 20. Answer the following questions. 1. Are marriages in your country arranged by the parents, or do the young people decide themselves whom to marry? 2. How do you understand the expression “to come of age”? When do young people in your country come of age? 3. Are boys and girls in England permitted to become engaged when still in their teens? 4. Starting with what age is it officially permitted to get married in your country? 5. What does an engagement ring mean and on what finger is it worn? 6. In what way do the engaged persons speak about each other? 7. Do modern girls receive marriage portions? Why? 8. Describe the wedding ceremony in English speaking countries. 9. Does the wedding ceremony in your country go in the same way? 10. What is a prominent feature of the wedding party? Why is the wedding cake so richly decorated? 11. Why is the wedding ceremony loaded with different ritual practices? 12. Is the choice of date for the wedding in your country as important as it is in England? 13. What colour is considered to be lucky for the wedding outfit in your country? 14. Why do English girls try to ensure that their wedding dress includes “something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue”? 15. What is considered to be a lucky omen by the English girl? Are there any such omens in Russia? 16. What other wedding superstitions do you know, which are observed in your country and other countries of the world? 17. What are the features added by the different religious groups to a traditional wedding ceremony? 18. Do you know any untraditional ways of conducting a wedding ceremony? Exercise 21. Retell the text Exercise 22. Translate into English. Я ищу себе жену. Какой она должна быть? Я не требую от нее интересной внешности. Пусть у нее будет только стройная фигура и красивое лицо. Она должна быть веселой, когда я шучу. И шутить, когда я прихожу домой навеселе. Меня не интересует ее жилплощадь. Главное – чтобы она была большая. Меня не интересует ее зарплата. Лишь бы она была больше моей. А вот расходы на свадьбу – поровну; половину внесет она, а другую – ее родители. Я уверен: когда мы поженимся, у нас появятся общие интересы. Если, например, она не захочет идти со мной на футбол, то мы останемся дома и будем смотреть по телевизору хоккей. Я буду заботиться о ее здоровье. Чтобы к ней не попадало спиртное, табачное, мучное и сладкое, я буду все это уничтожать сам. Она будет у меня одеваться как богиня: просто и недорого. Я возьму на себя часть ее работы, если, конечно, она возьмет на себя всю мою. Мне не важно, как она будет готовить. Лишь бы это было вкусно. И необязательно, чтобы это была только русская кухня. Здесь у нее полная свобода: сегодня кухня грузинская, а завтра – венгерская утром и китайская вечером. Я ищу себе жену. Я готов отдать ей полжизни, если она отдаст мне свою целиком. Если ее не будут удовлетворять мои требования, пусть ищет себе нового мужа. Вот уже много лет я ищу себе жену. (из “Литературной газеты”) Exercise 23. Read the paragraph. Then follow the directions. What makes a marriage happy? Some people say that love and trust are important. Others think that flexibility and friendship are most essential. Many people believe that good communication is necessary in order for a marriage to succeed. If two people are able to tell each other what they are thinking and feeling, they may be better able to work out solutions to their problems. Some people in the United States have even written marriage agreements to improve communication in their relationships. A marriage agreement is a written promise that is created by two people who are living together. In an agreement there are rules that tell how each partner in a relationship should behave. The rules differ depending on the priorities and personalities of the people writing the agreement.

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I. Work in pairs. Read the quotations by famous people about marriage. Answer the questions. Then discuss the quotations with the class. Do you agree or disagree with the writer? Why or why not? 1. “In almost every marriage, there is a selfish and an unselfish partner. A pattern begins and never changes, of one person always asking for something and the other person always giving something.” Iris Murdoch, British writer and philosopher 2. “A man who is a good friend is likely to find a good wife, because marriage is based on a talent for friendship.” Fredrich Nietzsche, German philosopher 3. “A successful marriage is a house that must be rebuilt every day.” André Maurois, French writer and critic Do the writers have a positive or a negative opinion of marriage? Do the writers feel that a husband and wife are equal or unequal in marriage? II. Read and translate the following text Focus on Marriage

“To love and honour... in sickness and in health... for poorer... for better, for worse...till death do us part” These are some of the vows made by men and women in an American wedding ceremony. But how many young people about to get married think about what they mean? John Lucas and Mary Holmes, both 24, have decided to get married soon. But they don’t want the traditional vows. They want a legal contract which will define their representative obligations, and expectations when they are married. In talking about their marriage John and Mary have to examine why they want to marry and what they expect from each other. This is the document, which they now want a lawyer to put onto a legal contract for them to sign. THE CONDITIONS WE WANT TO AGREE AND SIGN ARE:

1. 2. 3. 4.

Mary will keep her own last name after we are married. We shall continue our separate careers and help each other in them. We shall decide together where to live. We shall respect each other’s private property and regard anything bought jointly after we are married as joint property. 5. We shall have separate bank accounts, but both contribute (depending on our incomes) to the payment of bills for food, rent, etc. 6. We shall both share with the management of the home (cooking, cleaning, etc.) 7. We shall have equal responsibility in bringing up any children and providing them with food, clothes, shelter and education until they are 18. 8. We wish to be able to revise this contract at any time if either of us is dissatisfied. 9. Through our marriage we intend to: • talk about how it is going; • tell each other how we’re feeling; • spend most of our leisure time together. 10. If we have a disagreement that we cannot resolve we agree to go to a third person a marriage councillor, clergyman, etc. III. Answer these questions: 1. Have you been to many weddings? Did you like them? Why? 2. Do women in your country often change their name after marriage? 3. Do you feel that you spend enough quality time with the people you love? 4. What have John and Mary decided? 5. What do they think about traditional vows? 6. What name will Mary have when they are married? 7. Is Mary going to stop working? 8. What will happen to their property when they marry? 9. What sort of bank accounts will they have? 10. How will they pay the bills? 11. How will responsibility for bringing up children be shared? Exercise 24. Vocabulary for Comprehension. Read the conversations. Then Listening 3 choose the best words to complete the difinitions of the underlined words. 1. A: What are your expectations for marriage? B: I think we will be very happy and never ague.

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An expectation is a ______________. a. hope or desire b. past experience 2. A: It really bothers me when my husband leaves his dirty socks on the floor. I can’t stand it. B: I agree. That really annoys me, too. To annoy someone means to do something that makes the person feel _____________. a. angry b. happy 3. A: You know what my pet peeve is? When people smoke sigarettes in a restaurant. B: I hate it when people play loud music on the bus. A pet peeve is a(n) _____________ that you dislike a. person b. action 4. A: He was late, but he took me out to dinner to make up for it. B: That was nice. Did it make you feel better? To make up for it means to do something nice because you _______________. a. did something wrong b. feel like being nice 5. A: I’m feeling very, very angry right now! B: Why don’t you go into the other room and cool off. We can talk when you feel less angry. To cool off means to become less _____________. a. hot b. angry 6. A: This list of phone numbers is five years old. I don’t think it’s correct anymore. B: You are right. I need to update the list. To update means to make something ________________. a. newer or more current b. longer or more complete A. Introducing the Topic. Listen to the announcer read the beginning of Bob and Jane Parsons’ marriage agreement. Then listen to some questions the reporter asks later on in the interview. How do you think Bob and Jane will answer the questions? 1. Bob, Jane, first I’d like to ask you why you decided to write this unusual agreement? Predicted answer: ______________________________________________________________ 2. So, do you spend a lot of time checking to see if the other person is following the rules? Predicted answer: ______________________________________________________________ 3. What happens if one of you breaks the rule? Predicted answer: ______________________________________________________________ 4. Do you think other couples should follow your example and write marriage agreements of their own? Predicted answer: ______________________________________________________________ B. Listening for main ideas. Listen to the interview. Several problems that married people have are discussed. Put a check (9) next to the problems that are mentioned in the interview. ______ 1. working out day-to-day details and problems ______ 2. having different expectations than your spouse ______ 3. having problems with in-laws and family members ______ 4. not talking enough about what each person wants ______ 5. having disagreements about money ______ 6. being jelous about other men/women ______ 7. arguing ______ 8. not knowing how to apologize ______ 9. having disagreements about pets C. Listening for details. Listen to the intrview again. Listen for the details in the marriage agreement. Choose the correct letter to complete the statements. 1. HOUSEHOLD CHORES: ____ will do the household chores. a. Jane b. Bob c. both Bob and Jane 2. GROCERY SHOPPING: Jane will always _____ when she shops for groceries. a. buy items on sale b. use a list c. spend less than $100 per week 3. CLEANING UP: nothing will be left _____ overnight.

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a. on the kitchen table b. in the bedroom c. on the floor 4. SLEEPING: they will go to bed ______ . a. at 11:00 pm every b. at 11:00 pm on c. whenever they want night weeknights 5. CHILDREN: Bob and Jane will ______ . a. wait 5 years before b. have no more c. both stop working to take care they have children than 3 children of the children 6. MONEY: Bob and Jane must both agree if one of them wants to spend _______ . a. less than $100 b. more than $100 c. more than $200 7. COMMUNICATION: Bob and Jane must talk for 15 to 30 minutes _______ . a. every day b. every 2 days c. once a week 8. BREAKING THE RULES: if someone breaks the rules, they must apologize and _____ . a. pay $50 b. do something to c. never break the rule again make up for it 9. DRIVING: if they get lost in the car, they must ask for directions _______ . a. after 5 min b. after driving for 10 min c. when they are far from home 10. ANGER: when they get angry, they must not _______ . a. yell or use abusive b. go to another room c. show their anger language 11. CHANGING THE AGREEMENT: the marriage agreement must be updated ______ . a. once a year b. every 5 years c. if they get divorced D. Listening Between the Lines. In the Background section you read some quotations by famous people about marriage. Read the following summaries of the quotations. Then listen to excerpts from the interview with Bob and Jane. Would Bob and Jane agree with the ideas in each summary? Circle Yes or No. Then explain why you chose your answer. Use specific examples from the interview to show why they would agree or disagree. Excerpt 1. The quote by Iris Murdoch says that in most marriages only one person can get what he or she wants. Would Bob and Jane agree with this idea? Yes No Why or why not? _________________________________________________________________ Exerpt 2. The quote by Friedrich Nietzsche says that to have a happy marriage, a man must be a good friend to his wife. Would Bob and Jane agree with this idea? Yes No Why or why not? _________________________________________________________________ Excerpt 3. The quote by André Maurois says that to have a successful marriage, a husband and wife must work to make each other happy. Would Bob and Jane agree with this idea? Yes No Why or why not? _________________________________________________________________ E. Reactions to the Marriage Agreement. Listen to people’s reactions to Bob and Jane’s marriage agreement. Do they think the agreement is a good idea or a bad idea? Listen for the speaker’s opinion and check Good idea or Bad idea. Then choose from the next page the reason for each speaker for his or her opinion. One reason isn’t mentioned. Speakers Person 1:

Good idea

Person 4:

Bad idea Person 2:

Good idea Bad idea

Person 3:

Good idea Bad idea

Good idea Bad idea

Person 5:

Good idea Bad idea

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Reasons d. Not legal e. Too many detail f. Divides household chores evenly

a. Makes couples think carefully before they marry b. Helps couples talk about problems c. Not romantic Exercise 25. Every married couple should sign a legal contract. State the arguments for or against this statement. EXAMPLES AGAINST FOR a. It makes them exmine proposed relationship a. Good marriage is based on love; you can’t write love into legal document. realistically, not through “rose-coloured” b. Vows say everything: like unwritten contract. glasses. c. Both partners already know what to expect, b. They try to forsee difficulties. they don’t need it written out. c. It helps to insure joint decisions – when to d. Contaracts like this can lead to further marry, where to live, etc deterioration of the idea of marriage and its d. It clarifies expectations for both partners. purposes. e. A well-arranged marriage is likely to be far e. Marriage is not an end, but a beginning. more successful than any marriage for love. f. A contract like this will help a woman to f. If a woman wants a career, she shouldn’t have children and marry. establish in her career. Exercise 26. Read and translate the following text American Family

In the United States about 2,5 million couples marry each year. It means that nine out of ten people in the USA live as members of families and they value their families highly. Most of the Americans say that family is very important to them, “Families, they say, give us a sense of belonging and a sense of tradition, families give us strength and purpose. Our families show us where we are. The things we need most deeply in our lives – love, communication, respect and good relationships – have their beginning in the family”. Families serve many functions. They provide conditions in which children can be born and brought up. Families help to educate their members. Parents teach their children values as well as daily skills. They also teach them common practices and customs, such as respect for eldest and celebrating holidays. But the most important job for a family is to give emotional support and security. A traditional American family is one in which both parents are living together with their children. The father goes out and works and the mother stays at home and brings up the children. But most American families today do not fit this image. Many Americans disregard traditional marriage patterns. For example, a large number of married couples share responsibilities that have been traditionally handled by either the husband or the wife. More and more husbands help their wives to perform the chores traditionally handled by women, such as cooking, doing housework, and caring for the children. The biggest change is that in many families both parents work outside the home. An increasing number of married women have paying jobs and help support their families financially. There are two main reasons why mothers and wives work. One reason is that women have more opportunities today than, for example, fifty years ago. The other reason is that women say they work because it is an economic necessity. In 1940 about 15 percent of all married women earned money. In the early 1990’s about 60 percent held a full- or part-time job. Certainly, when both parents work, they have less time to spend with their children and with each other. Often families stop eating their meals together and thereby lose an important time to share the events of the day. What happens to children whose parents work? Nearly half of these children are cared for by day-care centres or baby-sitters. The rest are cared for by a relative, such as a grandparent. Some companies are trying to help working parents by offering flexible work hours. This allows one parent to be at home with the children, while the other parent is at work.

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One more change is that families in the USA are getting smaller. Today an average household contains only two or three people. There is an increase in the number of families that are headed by only one person, usually the mother. In the United States, divorce has become common. Each year, more than a million American couples divorce. Most couples who divorce do so in the first 10 years of marriage. These numbers are very high, as they are in many other industrialised countries. The number of divorces has grown steadily in the United States for many years. Now, however, it has stopped growing and during the past five years the number of divorces has even been decreasing. United States divorce laws allow men and women to escape bad marriages, getting a divorce is quite easy here, but it is one of the most stressful events in the life of grown-ups. Children also suffer during a divorce. Nevertheless most people think that living with one parent is better for children than living with two parents who are unhappy with one another and fight most of the time. A majority of divorced people remarry, and many have a successful marriage with another partner. Most American families include members of just two generations: parents and the children. What is their attitude toward each other? Teenagers often consider their father old-fashioned. As for the father, he usually does his best to give his children a better education, a better background, a better chance than he had himself. His parent’s role is finished when he has brought his children to the end of formal education. After their graduation the children often try to achieve complete independence, leaving the maternal home and sometimes even the native town. The mother is not usually expected to play any part in her daughter’s marriage, beyond possibility being an honoured guest at the wedding reception. Unlike their parents, many single adult Americans today are waiting longer to get married. Some men and women marry and start their family life later because they want to graduate from the university or college others want to become more established in their chosen profession. Couples are also waiting longer before they have children. Some couples today decide not to have any children at all. However, many people choose never to marry. Some people who remain single may not find a mate with whom they want to share their life. Others may not want the many responsibilities required of a successful marriage. Still others prefer to stay unmarried because they enjoy their independence. Exercise 27. Explain in your own words the meaning of the following words and word combinations: custom/tradition; skill; family pattern; to support; to share something; baby-sitter; a relative; divorce; background, generation; old-fashioned, honoured guest, established family, graduation. Exercise 28. Use the following words and word combinations in sentences of your own. daily skills; to fit the image; to share responsibilities; part-time job; flexible working hours; to escape; stressful event; average household; to give a better chance; to achieve independence; wedding reception. Exercise 29. Answer the following questions: 1. Why do Americans value their families? 2. What functions does family serve? Can you add some other functions? What? 3. How can you explain the term “traditional American family”? 4. Describe in few sentences a typical Russian family. 5. What changes can we see in the American family today? Can we refer these changes to any Russian family? 6. Is your family important to you? Why? 7. Do you have a tradition in your family to discuss the events of the day in the evening? 8. What do your parents teach you? 9. Do you think that every family problem is easier when it is shared? Why? 10. What does your family mean to you? 11. Why is a divorce a stressful event in the life of a child? 12. How urgent is this problem in the USA? 13. Can you give any example of divorce statistics in Russia? 14. How do usually teenagers consider their parents? 15. Why do teenagers want to achieve independence? 16. Are two incomes usually necessary to support a family in your country? 17. How do men in Russia feel about their wives work? 18. Do many mothers in our country work outside the home? 19. Do you think that problems of a modern family are the same in Russia as in other countries? Exercise 30. Retell the text. Exercise 31. Translate the following text into Russian. The idea of a family system is based on the notion of the organisation of pattern over time. The

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patterning of daily life in any family is built up over the lifetime of the family, what has been learnt from the patterns of previous generations. Much of the patterning in every family operates at the level of habit. Family pattern is made up of interpersonal relationships involving people with individually specific past histories. Each family has a rhythm, a time span and a form of its own. Many families suffer from a number of current life stresses. Crises means the breakdown of old patterns and the possibility of new patterns development. The outcome of crisis is not necessarily positive. The mobilisation of hope and the restoration of control over the situation are very important in this case. Social workers more than other professionals should understand such critical situations. An essential feature is contact between family and professional will be the way in which the family feels the worker can hold the crisis and help them. Exercise 32. Read and translate the following text. • Pre-reading task: practise the pronunciation of the following words: to cause; to aspire; solitary; to cohabit; to maintain; annual; acceptance; to pursue; inevitable; consequence; isolation; illegitimate; decline; immorality; verdict; failure; simplistic Problems of a Modern British family

A “typical” British family, used to consist of mother, father and two children, but in recent years there have been many changes in family life. Some of these have been caused by new laws and others are the result of changes in society. The British live longer, marry later, have fewer children and are more likely to get divorced than ever before. Young people leave home earlier, though not necessarily to get married. More women now go out to work and more people, especially the old, live alone. The nuclear family, a married couple with perhaps two children, is still considered the ideal social unit and most young people still aspire to this idea of their own future. Yet as a picture of the way most British people live, it is increasingly unrealistic. If the picture includes the traditional idea of the man going out to work while the wife stays at home, it is now true of less than 10 per cent of households. Even without such a limited definition, only 40 per cent of the population live in nuclear family households, and even within this group a considerable proportion of parents are in their second marriage with children from a previous marriage. Social behaviour is rapidly changing. The number of people living alone has risen significantly, from one in 10 in 1951 to more than one in four 40 years later, and it is one in three at the beginning of the twenty-first century. In the same period the proportion of households containing five or more people has halved to fewer than one in 10. The British are clearly becoming a more solitary nation in their living habits. These facts have social implications, for example housing needs in the future. There is an increasing proportion of men and women living together before marriage. For example, in 1961 only 1 per cent of first-time married couples had previously been living together, compared with 25 per cent in 1976. In the year 2000 most couples lived together before marrying. About one in four of the couples living together, or ‘cohabiting’, never do get married. Until 1990 or so it was possible to maintain that marriage was as popular as ever. Recently, however, there has been a rapid drop from the annual average of 400,000 weddings during the 1980s to only 279,000 by 1996, the lowest ever recorded figure. Britain has the highest divorce rate in Europe. Thirty-eight per cent of marriages end in divorce, one quarter of first marriages failing in the first five years. The rate is highest among those on low income and those who marry very young, say under the age of 24. By 1995 people were also on average three years older when they married, 28 for men and 26 for women, compared with the average ages in 1985. What happens to those who do not marry? Besides a fall in the total number of marriages each year, there has been an increase in the number of couples choosing to live together but not marry, and also of women who choose to marry later in life. Only one in seven women aged between 25 and 29 was still single in 1979, compared with more than one in three by the mid-1990s. Some women prefer independence, either by cohabiting or by living alone, which they fear they will lose by marriage. Personal development must also partly explain the growing divorce rate. Alongside a social acceptance of divorce greater today than in the 1950s and 1960s, women have been increasingly dissatisfied by the traditional expectations of the woman’s role in marriage. They also usually now want the right to pursue a career. Sometimes the husband’s difficulty in adapting to the new situation puts a strain on

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the marriage. One inevitable consequence of the climbing divorce rate has been the rise of single-parent families. These families often experience isolation and poverty. Single-parent families have been increasing, from 8 per cent of all families in 1972 to 22 per cent by 1995. The great majority of single parents are women. One in three children under the age of five has divorced parents. Forty per cent of children experience the divorce of their parents before the age of 18. There has also been an increase in babies born outside marriage. It is indicative of both the increasing proportion and changing social attitudes that these babies, once described as ‘illegitimate’, are now described officially as ‘non-marital’. In 1961 only 6 per cent of births were non-marital, but the rate has recently risen steeply from 16 to 33 per cent in the years 1983-95. This rapid rise reflects the increase in cohabitation, which accounts for 48 per cent of non-marital births. Unfortunately, cohabitation is no indication of a long-term stable environment for children. Statistics show that cohabiting parents are three times more likely to split up than married parents. The remaining non-marital births are to single mothers, with the rate being highest in areas of high unemployment and the greatest poverty, suggesting to some analysts that the birth of a child gives a woman in such circumstances someone to love, a purpose in life and also state assistance. There is also an ethnic dimension. On account of traditional patterns of family life, over 40 per cent of Caribbean families are single-parent ones. What can be made of such evidence? For some, such statistics are evidence of moral decline, and they argue the need to return to traditional values. In the face of the evidence this sounds like wishful thinking. Is Britain really in moral decline? It would be safer to say that moral values are changing, with less attention to traditional definitions of immorality, and greater emphasis on personal morality being rooted in kindness and respect for others. Many, however, would disagree with this verdict, pointing to the high divorce and non-marital birth rates as evidence of fundamental failure to be kind or to respect others. To blame a moral decline on the failure to uphold family values is simplistic. There are other things which must be considered to understand what is going on in society and why. A fundamental one is the matter of social class. Exercise 33. Find the English equivalents of the following words and word combinations. в последние годы; получить развод; ячейка общества; стремиться к чему-либо; значительно увеличиваться; бытовые привычки; утверждать; среднегодовой; процент разводов; низкий доход; оставаться незамужней (неженатым); заниматься карьерой; приспосабливаться к новой ситуации; ставить брак под угрозу; неизбежное последствие; неполная семья (с одним родителем); незаконнорожденный ребенок; государственная помощь; падение моральных устоев; традиционные ценности Exercise 34. Answer the questions. 1. What are the main changes in family structure mentioned in the text. 2. At what age do people in Britain get married on average? 3. What is the difference between a nuclear and an extended family? 4. Explain the following: a) illegitimacy; b) remarriage; c) single parent; d) to cohabit; e) divorce rate. 5. How does the number of children per family in Britain compare with your country? 6. How big is your own family? Exercise 35. Ask your group-mates 10 questions on the text. Exercise 36. Retell the text. Exercise 37. Translate into English. СЕМЬЯ

Это самое дорогое, что у вас есть. Это ваши мама и папа, сестры и братья, бабушки и дедушки – самые близкие вам люди, которые вас любят, заботятся о вас, делают все, чтобы жизнь ваша была счастливой. Словом это ваша семья. Вы вырастете, полюбите, женитесь или выйдете замуж, у вас появятся дети – и родится новая семья. Семья – самая необходимая ячейка в обществе. Стоит ли доказывать, что это так? И все же давайте вместе подумаем: чем мы все обязаны семье? Наверное, прежде всего тем, что существуем. Мы появились на свет потому, что наши мама и папа полюбили друг друга и

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создали семью. Значит, главное предназначение семьи в том, чтобы не иссякал человеческий род, чтобы появлялись новые люди. Рождение ребенка – это и большая радость, но и большая ответственность. Ведь он еще совсем беспомощный, и его надо вовремя накормить, помыть, сменить одежду. Родители учат его ходить, говорить, рассказывают ему сказки, играют с ним, гуляют, знакомят с окружающим миром. В школьные годы семья помогает детям учиться, находить свое место в коллективе одноклассников. Родители и другие взрослые члены семьи пробуждают в ребенке чувства совести и справедливости, знакомят с правилами поведения в обществе и нормами морали. Они учат его быть честным, не брать чужого, уважать старших, любить Родину, ценить труд людей и многому, многому другому. Следовательно, семья нужна еще и для того, чтобы помочь ребенку стать достойным человеком и гражданином своей страны. И, наконец, семья испокон веков считалась хранительницей домашнего очага, здорового образа жизни. В кругу родных вы находите то тепло человеческих отношений, взаимопонимание и сочувствие, которые не всегда можно найти даже среди близких друзей. Exercise 38. Read and translate the text, explain in your own words the meaning of words and word combinations in bold type. Answer the questions after the text. Challenges and opportunities

Public concern about the family remains high for many reasons. High rates of teen-age pregnancy and births to unmarried mothers force many young women to leave school or abandon career plans. Children from such families often grow up in poverty and are more likely to turn to crime. Drug and alcohol use and domestic violence also plague many families and lead to developmental disorders in children. With both mothers and fathers in many families working, parents struggle to find enough time to spend with their children. Working parents who can afford to may send their children to day care, but such parents often feel guilty that they do not spend enough time with their children. Those who cannot afford to or do not choose to use day care often have to leave their jobs or take cuts in pay. The resulting loss of income makes it harder for them to keep up their standard of living. For poorer parents, such a cut in earnings can be devastating. Although not a new problem, divorce remains an important challenge for families to overcome. Most men and women who seek a divorce do so because they cannot solve certain problems in their marriage. Such problems may include differences in goals or financial difficulty. If such problems remain unsolved, the marriage often breaks down. Divorce can affect every member of the family deeply. Children, for example, may grow up in a fatherless or motherless home. If one or both of the parents remarry, the children may not develop loving relationships with their new stepparents. Despite the challenges of today’s society, however, the family is not a dying institution. In many respects, family life today is stronger than it was in the past. Most people marry and have children. While divorce rates are higher than in the past, most individuals who do divorce eventually remarry. Because of declining death rates, more couples now grow into old age together, and more children have living grandparents. These relatives generally live much farther away from each other than they did in the past. However, e-mail and other communications technology may promote greater contact between separated family members. Meanwhile, parents now make greater emotional and economic investment in their children. Lower birth rates mean that parents can devote more attention and greater financial resources to each child. Fathers especially have become more involved in child rearing. More than ever before, families in trouble can receive help from a variety of outside sources, such as a family counselor, a social worker, or a psychologist. Such specialists often meet with the entire family to help its members work out problems together. Public welfare agencies and other groups provide economic aid to poor families and assistance to abused spouses or children. In the future, families will continue to face many challenges, especially the need to balance the demands of work and family life. Working parents must not only care for their young children, but, because of increasing life spans, tend to aging parents as well. (Steven Mintz, Ph.D., Associate Professor of History, University of Houston)

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Questions 1. What are the main reasons of public concern about the family? 2. Why do parents spend less time with their children? 3. What are some of the reasons for divorce according to the author of the article? What other reasons can you add? 4. How can you prove that in spite of all modern challenges family is not a dying institution? 5. What does the author mean when he speaks about greater emotional and economic investment of parents in their children? 6. What are the sources of outside help to the families in trouble? Exercise 39. Read and translate the following text into Russian. Use the information from the article as a starting point for discussion about the problems of a modern family. • Before-reading task: transcribe, practise the pronunciation and translate the following words: alas; crèche; pressure; repentance; boast; paternal; pregnancy, scarcely; subconsciously; burden; subsistence; catastrophically; catastrophe; evil; mutual; vacuum; jointly. What’s Happening to the Family?

By T. Shashkova “If you are going to marry one day think of the possible divorce”, – those were exactly the words that the mother of a family quite happy in our understanding told her daughter. Alas, nobody can be sure to avoid the divorce at any stage of the married life. Conditions that destroy the family exist too long. With almost total poverty a child can’t be afforded by many. Every family having children knows well how much you should pay for clothes, food, crèche, kindergarten and now even school. But the financial problem is not the only one. There may hardly be a person who has never faced the problem of living conditions. And the heaven in a hut can’t last forever, even if you are with someone you love. A woman is so busy that she simply has no time to communicate at any level except domestic and she is bringing her children up over telephone; these reasons can’t but make the atmosphere at home formal. And not all can overcome the pressure which is growing up every year, but no matter who says desperately: “I can’t stand it any longer, I want a divorce”, blaming the husband (or the wife) for all troubles, yet all further problems will fall upon the woman’s head. Sometimes women are naïve enough to believe that a man can’t leave the children. “He is so fond of them.” And this may be true. Yet a man is different from a woman, he has no biological need in seeing his child constantly. And when the former wife threatens: “You will never see your child again!”, wishing to cause repentance and fear she may achieve quite an opposite effect. A man can be boasting with his wonderful grown-up son not seeing him for years without any feeling of loss, but the former wife will call for his paternal feelings in vain when she needs any form of help. Not every man, even very strong and kind is capable for the daily-round deed. Therefore it is not very wise to make the man marry just to legalise relations that caused “incidental” pregnancy. The sense of duty will scarcely transform into the feeling of love. And the man will subconsciously feel that he is deceived. Such marriage can hardly be safe. A child will add to the family happiness only if he is loved and expected by both parents and not a burden for the young family. So a woman should be very prescient when choosing the husband and account the situation when she may be left alone. Where shall I live? Unfortunately many couples for years stay under the same roof after the divorce, this is impossible to imagine in any civilised country. There are strong doubts that a man will be generous enough to leave everything including the flat to his wife: he often has no place to go. How to make living? There are women – and many – who do not think of their career after marriage supposing it their husbands’ duty to support the family. In case of a divorce these women risk to be left without means of subsistence, and sometimes it may be too late to get a new profession. So a woman has no right to be thoughtless about marriage, because finally in the family she has to fulfil most part of work over the house, to take care of children, to earn the same money as men and in case of divorce even worse troubles fall to her lot. They often say that there are catastrophically many lonely women in our country. That’s right, there are a lot of lonely women. But is it actually a catastrophe? Perhaps women who have considered all variants decided that of two evils to be alone is less than together with a child without father or with her former husband in one room?

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Has the family died then? Perhaps it will be more proper to say that it has changed in quality though has suffered losses in quantity. And the main reason, for this is that a woman has changed. She is not satisfied with the role of a housekeeper. She wants to have a profession; she does not want to be dependent on another person. She has her own opinion, own hobby, she is interesting. And you may meet a lot of happy families based exclusively on mutual interests and respect. Among these couples there are childless as well but it does not form vacuum in the family because each of them is selfvaluable and interesting to the other. As for the question of children – to have or not to have – each family should decide it for itself, jointly. Then even the thought of divorce won’t arise. So whom to marry? Only the one whose way of thinking is close to yours, a man who is your friend, who respects a woman and personality in you. But for this you have to be such. Exercise 40. Preparing for listening. Sharing information. Work in pairs. Look at the chart, write your names. Each student says who in his or her household usually does the different household chores (for example, mother, father, son, daughter, grandmother, grandfather, both mother and father, and so on). Discuss the questions in the chart about your household and write each student’s answers. When you are finished, discuss the questions that follow the chart. NAMES

WHO COOKS?

WHO CLEANS?

WHO REPAIRS THINGS?

WHO TAKES CARE OF CHILDREN?

WHO MANAGES MONEY/ PAYS BILLS

1. What do men usually do? 2. What do women usually do? 3. What do both men and women do equally? Why? Read the paragraph. Then follow the directions below. One important chore in household with children is taking care of the children. In some households, family members take care of the children. In other households, families want additional help, so they use child care. They hire people to take care of their children. A. INTRODUCING THE TOPIC 1. Look at the list. Imagine you need child care. Rank the things to consider when choosing child care in order of importance from 1 (most important) to 11 (least important) - The child care is cheap. - It’s convenient (near my work or home) - The child-care worker is friendly and caring with children. - The child-care worker is female. - The child-care worker is male. - The child-care worker speaks my language. - The child-care worker is from my culture. - The child-care worker has experience. - The child-care worker has training, for example, he or she studied child-care in school. - The child-care worker is someone I know, not a stranger. - The child-care worker is my relative. 2. Now compare your answers in a group. Tell why each item is important or not important to you. B. VOCABULARY FOR COMPREHENSION. Read the paragraphs. Guess the meaning of the underlined words. Then match each word with its definition. Write the number of the word in the blank. Families all over the world are different – there is no (1) typical family. In different families, men and women sometimes do different (2) household chores such as cooking and cleaning. But, there is one question all families with children have: Who takes care of the children when the parents work? Who does the (3) child care?

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There are a few choices for working parents. One choice is to take the children to a day-care center. Parents can bring their children to the day-care center before work and pick them up after work. Another choice is to (4) hire a (5) sitter whose job is to take care of children. A sitter may take care of children in his or her house or come to the family’s house. Another choice is to hire a (6) nanny. A nanny usually lives with a family and takes care of the children. Sometimes (7) child-care workers go to school where they get (8) training in taking care of children. _______ a. a person who takes care of children in the family’s home or in his or her home _______ b. give a job to _______ c. education to learn how to do something _______ d. work in the house such as cooking and cleaning _______ e. people who take care of children _______ f. a person who usually lives with a family and takes care of the children _______ g. usual or regular _______ h. taking care of children while parents work Listening 4 Exercise 41. Listening A. INTRODUCING THE TOPIC. You are going to listen to an interview on a TV talk show. Listen to the introduction. Then answer the questions. 2. Who is Julie Jones going to interview? 1. What is the talk show about? a. a parent a. men and women b. a nanny b. child care c. a young child c. children 3. What are three questions you think Julie Jones will ask? a. ____________________________________________________________________ b. ____________________________________________________________________ c. ____________________________________________________________________ B. LISTENING FOR MAIN IDEAS. Read the list of issues. Listen to the TV talk show. Put the issues in order from 1 to 5. (Which issue is discussed first, second, third, and so on). _____ The difference between a nanny and a sitter 1 _____ Child care in the United States _____ What a nanny does _____ What one husband thinks about male nannies _____ How this man became a nanny C. LISTENING FOR DETAILS. Listen to the TV talk show again. Circle the letter of the sentence that is true. 1. a. More than 50 percent of families with children in the United States pay for child care. b. Fewer than 50 percent of families with children in the United States pay for child care. 2. a. A woman is sometimes called a manny. b. A man is sometimes called a manny. 3. a. A male and female nanny do the same things. b. A male and female nanny do different things. 4. a. A sitter usually does household chores. b. A nanny usually does household chores. 5. a. This male nanny thinks child care is women’s work. b. This male nanny doesn’t think child care is women’s work. 6. a. This male nanny went to a special school. b. This male nanny didn’t go to a special school. 7. a. Most parents like male nannies. b. Some parents like male nannies. 8. a. The woman who hired this male nanny was surprised. b. The woman who hired this male nanny wasn’t surprised. 9. a. At first, the woman’s husband didn’t like the many being alone with his wife. b. At first, the woman’s husband liked the many being alone with his wife.

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10. a. This male nanny has friends who are mannies. b. This male nanny doesn’t have friends who are mannies. D. LISTENING BETWEEN THE LINES. Listen to the excerpts from part A. Discuss these questions with a partner. Excerpt One Who likes male nannies? Why? Think of three reasons. Excerpt Two 1. Are male nannies the same as fathers? What are some differences? 2. Think back to when you were a child. Would you have liked a nanny? If yes, would you have liked a male or a female nanny? Why? Exercise 42. 1. Before reading the next text, look at the words below. How many of them do you know? How many of them could you guess? (for example by splitting the words up: sub-servient; co-habitation) subservient cohabitation relapse chore prey impediment apt strive gender loot 2. Now look at these words in sentences. It should be easier to guess their meaning. Later, however, they may relapse into their a. Woman, long considered the inferior sex, are bad old ways. therefore expected to be subservient to men. b. Intolerance can be a serious impediment to f. Gender roles tend to be allocated in marriage. For example, women are expected to be successful marriage. responsible for cleaning, cooking and other c. Any relationship which involves cohabitation household chores, while men are the presents problems which are avoided if one breadwinners. lives alone. d. Married couples behave in predictable ways. g. The hunter instinct survives in men. Women are still regarded as prey, to be caught and For example, they are apt to take on certain conquered. roles in the family. e. In the early days of marriage husbands and h. Traditionally, men bring home the loot in the form of the weekly pay packet. wives strive to be on their best behaviour. When you see these words in the text below it should be even easier to guess their meaning. 3. How many of the above statements on marriage do you agree with? 4. Think of ways in which you can describe the roles of husband and wife in marriage and the family. List in order of importance. For example, Wife: cook, mother Husband: breadwinner, handyman

5. What factors do you think help to make a marriage survive happily? List them in order of importance. For example, friendship, good financial position

The following texts are both about marriage. The first is from a magazine about human behaviour. 6. While you read the first text, decide if you agree or disagree with the writer’s views, and note your reactions in the margin. If you agree, put 9; if you agree strongly put 99; if you disagree put X; and if you disagree strongly, put XX. Traditionally, the woman has held a subservient position in marriage partnerships. While her husband went his way she had to wash, stitch and sew. Today the move is to liberate the woman, which may in the end strengthen the marriage union. Perhaps the greatest impediment to friendship in marriage is the amount a couple usually see of each other. Friendship in its usual sense is not tested by the strain of daily, year-long cohabitation. Couples need to contrive separate interests (and friendships) as well as mutually shared ones, if they are not to become inured to the more attractive elements of each other’s personalities. Married couples are apt to exert themselves for guests – being amusing, discussing with passion and point – and then to relapse into dull exhausted silence when the guests have gone. They may compound the boredom by starting to accuse each other of points of inattention or illogicality or

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“disloyalty” that they noticed in the other. As in all friendship, a husband and wife must strive to interest each other, and to spend sufficient time-sharing absorbing activities to give them continuing common interests. But at the same time they must spend enough time on separate interests with separate people (without jealousy on the other’s part) to preserve and develop their separate personalities and keep their relationship fresh. For too many highly intelligent working women, home represents chore obligations, because the husband only tolerates her work and does not participate in household chores. For too many highly intelligent working men, home represents dullness and reproaches – from an overdependent wife who will not gather courage to make her own life. In such atmosphere, the partners grow further and further apart, both love and liking disappearing. For too many couples with children, the children are allowed to command all the time and attention, allowing the couple no time to develop liking and friendship, as well as love, allotting them exclusive parental roles. We live in an industrial society with universal education and universal suffrage and the ability to control the number of children we can cope with. Yet we nurture many gender prejudices suited only to slave or tribal societies. However almost in spite of ourselves – in spite of our conditioning – we are seeking friendship between men and women. Most of the media deride the possibility – after all, if every man is not to regard every woman as dangerous prey and every woman is not to regard every man as a dangerous source of loot and flattery, a major part of sensationalist reporting and fiction is lost. But it seems that friendship is possible between people of different gender. And it is also possible between people who are sexually involved with each other. It does not seem too soon for friendship to be recognized as a desirable component of the marital relationship. There can be few more rewarding activities than learning to make friends with your married partner. from The Family of Man 7. Compare your reactions to the text with those of a friend. Decide on which points you agree, on which points you disagree, and why. 8. Look back at the text for factors which the author considers might be a danger in marriage. Group them under the headings: Boredom Gender Roles Parenthood The second text is from a women’s magazine. It is about a young couple with a small baby. The questions below are about the problems that can arise for such a couple. 9. First look at the questions; then, as you read, write down Ann and Brian’s answers to them. a) At what point in their marriage should a couple have a baby? b) A wife with a good career may have to give it up when she has a baby; what dangers are inherent in this? c) How should a husband react to the boredom a wife may feel when she has to look after the baby all day? d) To what extent should the husband be involved in looking after the baby? e) Should husband and wife have separate evenings out? Ann and Brian Stainton are a modern, intelligent couple who felt it was essential to establish their marriage and strengthen their relationship before having a baby. Ann also wanted to prove herself in her career, which she has done during the first five years of marriage, becoming personal assistant to two top executives in large London organisations. We were sitting in the dining-area of their large L-shaped lounge. Ann, aged 25, made a graceful picture as she poured out coffee, her long hair framing her oval face. Her husband Brian is 30, enthusiastic, articulate and much more aware than most husbands of what it means for a career wife to find herself cut off from the challenge of mental stimulus of a responsible job. “I worried about becoming a cabbage,” she admitted. “I’m a person who needs people, who thrives on mental challenges. There are few neighbours with babies and anyway, I don’t want to be eternally discussing child-care and recipes. “The telephone is my lifeline and I keep in touch with office friends. I also listen to the radio a lot – the talks, the discussions, the phone-ins. I became quite terrified that Brian would find me a dull

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companion.” She turned to him and challenged: “Do you find there’s not so much to talk about now I’m home all day?” There was silence while Brian considered. “I know you’re concerned about this and there had been conflict I’ve had to overcome. I mean before, the two of us were at work, both earning and with jobs of equal importance and we talked mainly about them. I must admit I fought the temptation to say, “Don’t bother me – I’ve had a rotten day, I want to watch the telly and my job is all-important now and I want to relax.’ “A selfish attitude, I know, because I’ve only got to put myself in Ann’s shoes, and I’d feel as frustrated as she if I had to face an evening of near silence after a day spent in a one-sided conversation with Joel and the cat! So we do range over a whole lot of topics, discussing what Ann’s heard on the radio or what I’ve read in the papers. I’d say our horizons on the talk front are far wider. But it was another pattern we had to learn.” I asked if they ever went visiting friends in the evening, taking Joel with them. “We tried it, but it didn’t work very well.” Ann confessed. “Joel is a happy, contented baby if kept to his routine. But if we were going out, he didn’t sleep and then would cry from overtiredness. I think it will be easier when he’s older. We’re both determined to try and make him fit into our lives as far as possible.” Ann and Brian had agreed that he should be totally involved with the care of the baby. “Anyway, bathing and feeding Joel was a two-person job at first,” Ann said. “He cried and his little arms and legs seemed to be moving in all directions and so Brian saw to the nappy end while I dealt with the upper half!” Had they ever thought of separate evenings out? Lots of young parents had an evening each at leisure classes or spent a night visiting friends. “Frankly, we prefer one another’s company.” Brian replied, “and if you’re not careful, separate interests can lead to an even wider separation in your pattern of living”. from Woman’s Own 10. Look back at the second text on marriage and choose one of the alternatives in the questions below; 3) a phone-in is 1) a cabbage means i) a telephone conversation with a friend i) a lazy person ii) a radio discussion conducted by ii) a dull person telephone iii) a happy person iii) a special kind of telephone iv) a lonely person iv) a radio programme about telephones 2) thrives means 4) challenge is to say something i) has no need of i) quietly ii) feels physically healthy ii) sadly iii) feels cheerful iii) boldly iv) is stimulated by iv) angrily Exercise 43. Write short summary on one of the following problems. 1. The role and functions of a family in one’s life. 2. Challenges and opportunities of a modern family. 3. Family pattern and gender roles. 4. Marriage contract and romantic love. 5. Young people in the west don’t hurry to get married. 6. Divorce and one-parent families. 7. Problems of young families in our country.

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P A R T 2 Having a Baby. Problems of Children Upbringing Exercise 1. Study the following words and word combinations. 1. Having a baby 20. ante-natal 1. gynaecologist 8. mother-to-be 14. miscarriage 28. dummy 21. post-natal 15. premature 9. to expect 2. obstetrician 29. high-chair 22. labour 16. incubator 3. midwife 30. nappy • expecting 17. Caesarian 4. foetus • induce labour 31. pram • an expectant operations 5. womb 23. breast-feeding 32. pushchair mother 18. forceps 6. fertility drug 24. bottle-feeding 33. potty 10. childbirth delivery 7. pregnant 34. rattle 25. bib 11. motherhood 19. morning 26. carry-cot • to be pregnant 12. confinement sickness 27. cot, crib • pregnancy test 13. to deliver 2. A happy child is: 3. A happy parent is: 1. approving; 13. good-natured; 15. reasonable; 1. able to cope with 2. caring; 14. gregarious; 16. self-possessed; difficulties; 3. communicative 15. hard-working; 17. self-restrained; 2. active; 4. confident; 16. industrious; 18. sensible; 3. affectionate; 5. considerate; 17. kind; 19. sensitive; 4. balanced; 6. consistent; 18. loving; 20. sociable; 5. communicative 7. firm; 19. motivated; 21. sympathetic; 6. confident; 20. open; 22. thoughtful; 7. conscientious; 8. friendly; 21. outgoing; 23. tolerant; 8. courteous; 9. gregarious; 22. polite; 24. understanding; 9. disciplined; 10. just; 23. responsive; 25. unselfish; 10. enthusiastic; 11. kind; 24. secure; 11. friendly; 12. kind-hearted; 25. self-disciplined; 12. getting along 13. patient; (comfortably) with 26. sociable; 14. reassuring; others; 4. An unhappy problem child is: 5. A bad parent is: 1. annoyed; 19. fearful; 19. nagging; 37. repressed; 1. aggressive; 2. babying; 20. frustrated; 20. pampering; 38. resentful; 2. anxious; 3. cruel; 21. harsh; 21. permissive; 39. restless; 3. arrogant; 22. humiliated; 40. rough (rude); 4. disapproving; 22. repressing; 4. belligerent; 5. fussy; 23. hurt; 23. self-centred; 41. self-centred; 5. bored; 24. impersonal; 42. self-indulging; 6. impatient; 24. self-interested; 6. bullying; 25. impudent; 25. sentimental; 43. self-interested; 7. inconsiderate; 7. coarse; 8. inconsistent; 26. inactive; 26. tough; 44. selfish; 8. cold; 9. impulsive; 27. indifferent; 45. self-willed; 27. uncompromising 9. confused, 10. indifferent; 28. insolent; 28. unfair; 46. shy (timid); 10. delinquent; 11. indulging; 29. listless; 29. unjust; 47. stubborn; 11. demanding; 12. insensible; 30. lonely; 30. unreasonable; 48. submissive; 12. depressed; 13. insensitive; 31. loveless; 31. unwise; 49. sulky; 13. disobedient; 32. misbehaving; 50. undisciplined; 14. intolerant; 32. unable to cope 14. disrespectful; 33. mixed-up; with difficulties; 51. unrestrained; 15. irresponsive; 15. distressed; 34. naughty; 33. violent; 52. unruly; 16. destructive; 16. irritable; 34. wrong-doing; 53. unsociable; 17. disturbed 17. loveless; 35. neglected; 54. wilful; 18. dull; 18. moralising; 36. offensive; Exercise 2. Put each of the words and phrases from the box on the next page in the passage below. pregnant deliver

born maternity ward call obstetrician

midwife parents

prams crawl

cots expecting

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When a woman is (a) _______ a baby, we say that she is (b) _______ . Babies are (c) ______ either at home or in the (d) _______ of a hospital. It is the job of a (e) _________ or a (f) _______ to (g) ________ new babies. The proud (h) _______ must soon decide what to (i) _______ the child. For the first six months of their lives most babies are taken out in (j) _______ and sleep in (k)_______ . At eight months or so they learn to (l) _______ along the floor, and they can usually walk soon after their first birthday. Exercise 3. Use the topical vocabulary in answering the following questions. 1. What traits of character would you name as typical for a normal happy child? Consider the following points with regard to his attitudes to: a) his family, parents; b) school, teachers, studies, rules and regulations; c) his classmates; d) his friends. 2. What traits of character would you consider prominent in a difficult child, a problem child? Consider the points given above. 3. What traits of character are brought up by excessively harsh discipline and pressure? 4. What traits of character would be brought about by lack of discipline and control, by pampering or permissiveness? 5. How would you describe a good parent? 6. What traits of a parent would you consider most favourable for a child? 7. What are the dangerous symptoms of a problem child? 8. What kind of parents’ attitude may make a child irresponsive, and unable to cope with difficulties? 9. Under what circumstances would a child grow confident self-possessed, able to cope with difficulties? Exercise 4. Read and translate the text, fulfill the task after the text. This will help you to remember and use the key words in the text. HAVING A BABY The day I got the results of the pregnancy test – positive, 'pregnancy confirmed' – I was over the moon. I sat down and made out a shopping list straightaway. List for Baby cot (or crib) for baby to sleep in pram and pushchair (and a carry-cot) to transport him or her 2 dozen nappies for him or her to wear (underneath) safety-pins for his or her nappy high-chair for him or her to sit in at meal-times bib round his/her neck when he’s/she’s eating dummy for him or her to suck rattle for him or her to shake toys and dolls (and a teddy-bear) for him or her to play with potty for him or her to sit on to avoid nappies as soon as possible masses of cotton wool for general cleaning and wiping I couldn’t believe it: me a mother-to-be! Actually pregnant! Expecting! ‘An expectant mother’ – that was my favourite description of me. My friends all joked about me being on some kind of fertility drug, conceiving as I did so soon after our wedding. I had the customary morning sickness for a while, but after that, no trouble. I went along to the ante-natal clinic every fortnight and started doing all the proper breathing exercises like an excited child. And I read! Book after book on the subject of childbirth: how big the foetus is in the womb at the various stages, the pros and cons of confinement at home, how 15% of pregnancies end in miscarriage, the dangers of this and that. Some of it wasn’t very pleasant reading, I can tell you. The feeling of relief was indescribable when, at the beginning of the fifth month, the doctor said he could hear the baby’s heartbeat. He was a fully-trained gynaecologist, by the way – or was he an obstetrician? – I can’t remember. A few days later I felt the first kick, and that was a pretty exciting moment, too. It was in the twenty-eighth week that things began to go wrong. I had had several blood tests before, but after this one I was told my blood pressure was far too high – there was a risk of blood poisoning – and I would have to go into hospital. There followed a period of heartburn, cramp, vomiting and insomnia. I kept overhearing bits of conversations: ‘may have to induce labour’, ‘if the baby is premature, we’ll...’ etc. My mind was filled with visions of incubators, induction, Caesarean operations and appalling complications. And the baby wasn’t due

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for another six weeks! When the time came, I was in labour for twenty-three hours. I remember shouting through a haze as they took me into the labour ward: ‘No drip! No drugs! No stitches! Please!’ I came out having had them all, and in the end it was a forceps delivery – or so I’m told. After all that, I just looked forward to the simple joys of motherhood. When they told me I couldn’t breast-feed and she would have to be bottle-fed, my post-natal depression really started. Some nights I would lie awake mumbling ‘Never again’. It’s been pretty well the same story each time, but after the fifth I gave up saying ‘Never again’. I really do think that the stork system of having babies has a lot of advantages. ¾ Find all these figures and places in the text. Then show how they are relevant, as in the examples below: Example: 15% - That’s how many pregnancies end in miscarriage. masses – That’s how much cotton wool she bought. 1. 28th 3. at least 5 5. the ante-natal clinic 7. the labour ward 2. 23 hours 4. 2 dozen 6. every 2 weeks Exercise 5. Translate the following dialogue from Russian into English. - И вы с Джил действительно решили уехать в эту дыру? - Куда ты сказала? Будь добра, не называй Визингтон дырой. Это очень симпатичное местечко и всего 20 минут на машине от Манчестера. - А где вы будете там жить? - Там не трудно снять квартиру. И, между прочим, платить за нее придется поменьше, чем в Бристоле. - Что-то я еще хотела спросить. Да! А магазин? Я знаю, что Джил не особенно любит готовить. - Там не далеко есть супермаркет и магазин замороженных продуктов, и прекрасная больница Кристи. - А зачем это вам вдруг понадобилась больница? - Разве я тебе не говорил, что у Джил скоро будет ребенок? - Что ты сказал ребенок? Ну-ка повтори еще раз! - Ребенок! - Что же ты сразу не сказал? Когда? Как Джил себя чувствует? - Спасибо, все прекрасно. Мы думаем, в декабре. Да, пока не забыл, у тебя не сохранилась моя старая плетеная коляска? Джил говорит, что они сейчас в моде. - Прости, я не расслышала, что ты сейчас сказал. Я вспомнила тебя маленького. Вроде бы совсем недавно … Коляска, говоришь? Конечно, сохранилась. Как забавно, что бывает мода на коляски. - Даже на погремушки. У тебя, кстати, не осталось моих старых? - Я все соберу, когда будет время, и привезу к вам в Визингтон. А сейчас иди! Джил, должно быть, ждет тебя. Всего хорошего и большой привет от меня Джил! - Спасибо. Exercise 6. Read and translate the following texts into Russian. Use the information from the articles below as a starting point for discussion about the problems of children upbringing. A.

•

Before-reading task: transcribe, practise the pronunciation and translate the following words: desolate, inevitable, hamburger, café, desperately, to maintain, queue, to collapse, marital, percentage, survey. As it is now on Sundays, there are 111,000 fathers trailing a sometimes desolate, often confused little army of 185,000 children around zoos, parks, museums and the inevitable hamburger cafés – divorced Dads-for-a-day desperately trying to establish and maintain loving relationship in queues for an ice-cream or cinemas. This is family life lived in public in Britain of the ninetieth, where one in three marriages collapses, the highest marital breakdown percentage in Europe. Modern research has

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shown that, however difficult the circumstances, fathers are doing the right thing by maintaining regular contact with their children. Surveys show that the children of divorced parents who suffer least emotional damage are those in regular contact with their parents. (from Times Educational Supplement) B.

•

Before-reading task: transcribe, practise the pronunciation and translate the following words: sacrifice; average, nappy, justifiable, assumption; to assume; absurd, ridiculous; obsessed; to comprehend; to hinge; mission; maturity; to mature. The Children

by C. Northcote Parkinson Granted that children may be desirable we have next to decide upon their number. A family comprising one boy and one girl might be thought well balanced. The large family of five or more is not, however, generally desirable. While it may offer a good upbringing to the children this is only by a sacrifice of the parents. Five children at an average interval of two years must imply a quarter of a century, more or less, spent in changing nappies and supervising homework. This is justifiable only on the assumption that the children matter more than the parents. But why should this be assumed? There are instances, to be sure, where the fact is evident, but the theory that parents should always live for their children is absurd. That the child might be an Isaac Newton is true, but the father might be Johann Sebastian Bach. To conclude that each generation must matter less than the next is ridiculous and will lead us nowhere... All that is left for the child-oriented parent is the prospect of becoming a grandparent. This is merely an opportunity to make the same mistake again. It is true that a grandmother is sometimes the answer to the baby-sitter problem, but this hardly justifies her in making a baby-sitting career. For the sad fact is that marrying early has changed the pattern of grand-maternity. The girl who marries at 18 may be no more than 37 her daughter acts as hastily. The only solution is to be less obsessed with children from the outset. First to benefit from this more careless attitude are the children themselves. Where mother and father devote themselves to parenthood, children gain a wrong notion of their own importance. Taking themselves too seriously, they feel that their point of view is significant; that the world of today is something, which only they can comprehend, and that the future of mankind must hinge on what they say and do. This sense of mission has led some politicians to believe that young people have a new maturity. The fact is that to have matured at even the normal speed they would have needed, from the beginning, to have talked a great deal less and learnt a great deal more. C.

•

Before-reading task: transcribe, practise the pronunciation and translate the following words: to worsen, mortality, to cease; insurance policy; to recede; immune; persuasion; compulsion; cash allowances; maternity leave; expanded; privileges; psychology. Why So Many One-child Families?

Over half of Russian urban families have only one child. Many people put it down to the birth of a child worsening housing and economic conditions. But the latest investigation have shown that the higher the income of a family, the fewer children it has. The reason is, to a large extent, social progress. Today one does not need “reserve children”, because child mortality is relatively low. And children have ceased to be parents’ “insurance policy” in case of illness or old age. Meanwhile every new child takes up more time, and care, affecting parents’ ability to meet their cultural and intellectual requirements and participating in public life. As a result, the desire to have more children recedes to the background. To keep the population stable takes about 260 births per 100 families. For population growth, at least three children per family are needed. Reduced rates of population growth are not the only cause for alarm. Statistics show that in families with one child relations are less stable than in families with several. Of course, it would be wrong to suggest that all marriages with one child will necessarily end in divorce, while couples with several children are immune.

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An only child can also get accustomed to being spoilt, which can develop into selfishness. The problem will not be solved by persuasion or compulsion. The conditions must be created that will make a family want to have more children. The country demographic policy should combine cash allowances, a paid maternity leave, an expanded network of child-care centres, improved working conditions for women, privileges for large families, better housing conditions, and many other measures. However, it is clear that the problem cannot be solved by economic measures alone. We need a shift in the psychology of people who prefer to have one child. Exercise 7. Punishment. Read the paragraph. Then follow the directions. Ideas about how to punish children have changed over time. Also, they differ from culture to culture and family to family. Some parents believe that spanking children is the best way to punish. Others think that parents should never hit their children. Most parents punish their children in the same way that they were punished by their parents. Although all parents agree that children must learn the difference between right and wrong, there is a lot of disagreement about the best way to teach them this lesson. ¾ Discuss these questions in a group 1. How did your parents punish you? How did you feel about the punishment then? How do you feel about it now? 2. Do you think it is a good idea for parents to punish their children by spanking or hitting them? Why or why not? 3. What other types of punishment could parents use? ¾ A ten-year-old boy did something wrong. How should his parents punish him? Read the four situations at the top of the chart, then read the possible things the boy’s parents could do to punish him. Put a check (9) next to the punishment you think are best in each situation. (You can check more than one possible punishment). Then compare your answers with those of the other students and explain your choices. HOW SHOULD PARENTS PUNISH A 10-YEAR-OLD BOY WHO …

BROKE A WINDOW WHILE PLAYING BALL IN THE HOUSE?

HIT ANOTHER CHILD?

STOLE MONEY FROM A PARENT?

STARTED A FIRE WHILE PLAYING WITH MATCHES?

1. Yell at the child 2. Send the child to bed without dinner 3. Not let the child watch TV for a week 4. Make the child do an unpleasant task, such as clean the bathroom 5. Spank the child 6. Hit the child with a belt or stick 7. Other ____________________ ____________________ ¾ Vocabulary for comprehension. The following letter was written to a newspaper advice column. Read the letter. Then match the boldfaced words and phrases with the definitions below. Write the numbers in the blanks. Dear Gabby, My husband and I disagree about how (1) to discipline our children. We have different ideas about how to punish them when they (2) misbehave, or do something bad. He thinks that it’s (3) acceptable to spank them, but I think it is not right to hit them. He says that we should do it (4) for their own good, so our children will learn right and wrong. He says our children must (5) respect us, so they will listen to us and do what we say. I disagree. I believe that spanking, hitting, or any (6) corporal punishment is form of (7) child

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abuse and is very harmful to children. I think it is a form of (8) violence. It’s easy to (9) go too far and hurt them by mistake, even leaving a (10) bruise or other mark on their body. I think people who hit children should (11) be arrested by the police and put in jail. To tell the truth, I (12) admit that I sometimes feel like hitting my children when I am very angry, but I think that it’s wrong. What should my husband and I do? Signed, Confused Mom ____ h. punish ____ a. action that cause hurt or harm ____ i. a dark mark on the body caused by being ____ b. obey hit ____ c. all right ____ j. tell the truth ____ d. go beyond the limit ____ k. punishment that physically hurts the body ____ e. treatment that hurts a child ____ l. be taken by the police for committing a ____ f. do something wrong crime ____ g. in order to help them Exercise 8. Listening 5 A. Introducing the Topic. Listen to an excerpt of the report. Answer the questions. 1. What opinion do you think will be presented in the report? _____ Supporting spanking _____ Opposing spanking ____ Both opinions What words did you hear that made you choose your answer? 2. The reporter interviews several different people in this report. Who do you think will give an opinion about spanking? ____ Police officer ____ Parent ____ Teacher ____ Doctor ____ Child B. Listening for Main Ideas. In the report you will hear different people’s opinions about spanking. You will also hear many reasons for their opinions. Do the people being interviewed support spanking or oppose it? Listen to the report and check (9) each person’s opinion. Then write at least one reason for each opinion. SPEAKER

OPINION SUPPORT

OPPOSE

REASON(S)

1. Dale Clover 2. Rhoda Moore 3. Taylor Robinson 4. Dr. John Oparah 5. Dr. Beverly Lau C. Listening for Details. You have listened to the speakers’ opinions and have identified at least one reason for each opinion. Now listen for all the reasons. What does each speaker believe about spanking? Write Y for “yes” if the statement expresses the speaker’s beliefs. Write N for “no” if the statement does not express the speaker’s beliefs. Dale Clover, parent: 1. ____ Spanking is the only way to keep my son out of trouble. Rhoda Moore, parent: 2. ____ Pain helps children learn right and wrong. 3. ____ Spanking is done out of anger. 4. ____ Her children don’t understand why they are spanked. Taylor Robinson, parent: 5. ____ Spanking teaches children to solve problems with violence. 6. ____ Spanking teaches children to talk about problems. Dr. John Oparah, doctor: 7. ____ Many children don’t respect their parents. 8. ____ Parents who spank should be treated like criminals. 9. ____ Some children say they will call the police if their parents spank them Dr. Beverly Lau, doctor: 10. ____ Children who are spanked misbehave less often. 11. ____ Children who are spanked are less violent. 12. ____ 85% of cases of serious child abuse start when a parent spanks a child and the punishment goes too far

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D. Listening Between the Lines. Parents say to their children, “Do as I say, not as I do.” For example, parents who smoke cigarettes may tell their children, “Don’t smoke.” Children learn, however, not only by listening to what their parents say, but by watching what their parents do. We don’t always know which has a stronger effect. What do parents and doctors believe about how the children learn? Do they think that children learn more by watching what their parents do or by listening to what their parents say? Listen to the excerpts from the radio report. Each speaker has an opinion about how children learn. Check (9) each speaker’s opinion in the chart. Then write the reasons for the opinion. Compare your answers with your classmates. SPEAKER

OPINION WATCHING

LISTENING

REASON(S)

Excerpt 1 Rhoda Moore Excerpt 2 Taylor Robinson Excerpt 3 Dr. John Oparah Excerpt 4 Dr. Beverly Lau E. Expanding the Topic. Experts Opinions. What are the effects of spanking as children get older and become adults? Listen to four people’s opinions about the long-term effects of spanking. Listen once and check (9) if each person supports or opposes spanking. Then listen again and write the reasons for his or her opinion. Fill the chart with the information you hear. SPEAKER

OPINION SUPPORT

OPPOSE

REASON(S)

1. Donald Sterling 2. Dr. Phyllis Jones 3. Dr. Armando Mazzone 4. Lois Goldin F. Discussion. Discuss these questions in the group. 1. Compare beliefs about spanking and discipline in the United States with beliefs in other cultures. Use the information you heard in the listenings. How are the beliefs similar? How are they different? 2. Corporal punishment is sometimes used to punish students in school, criminal in jail, and soldiers in the military. Do you support corporal punishment in these situations? Do you support corporal punishment in any other situation? Why or why not? 3. Do you think parents discipline their sons differently from their daughters? If so, what are these differences? Why do you think there are differences? Exercise 9. Read and translate the following text. • Pre-reading task. Consult the dictionary and find the meaning of the following words and word combinations. Train their pronunciation. puberty, adolescents, to exaggerate, privacy, curfew, peer pressure, self-esteem, to falter, anonymous, vulnerable, marijuana, cocaine, boredom, abuse, addiction, juvenile delinquent, violation, theft, robbery, rape, assault, disrupted, reckless, syringes, tattooing, body piercing, suicide, selfesteem, nurturing, lax, to excel. Family relationships change most about the time of puberty. Conflict can increase between parents and adolescents, and closeness between them diminishes somewhat. Changing adolescent views on family rules and regulations may contribute to increased disagreement between young people and their parents. Some people very often talk about a “generation gap” – a gap between the views of

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the younger generation of teenagers and the views of their parents. But talk about a generation gap is sometimes exaggerated. Although young people may distance themselves from their parents as they enter adolescence, this period is not normally a time of family stress. Most conflicts take the form of minor arguments over day-to-day issues. In many families, the decline in closeness between parents and children in early adolescence results from the adolescent’s increased desire for privacy. In addition, teenagers and parents may express affection for each other less often. Generally, this distancing is temporary, and family relationships become closer and less conflict-ridden during middle and late adolescence. When American parents and teenagers argue, usually it is about simple things. The most common reason for their arguments is the teenagers’ attitude towards other family members. One more common reason is that parents want their children to help more about the house. The third most common basis for arguments between parents and teenagers is the quality of teenagers’ school-work. Some other traditional disagreements are over such things as curfew, whether or not to attend religious services, and the friends with whom the young people spend their leisure time. However, there exist some more, more serious, problems. Peer pressure, changing family conditions, mobility of families and unemployment are just a few reasons why some young people may try to escape reality by turning to alcohol or drugs. A young person’s move from elementary school to middle school or junior high school can be difficult. In elementary school, the child had a single homeroom teacher who knew him or her personally. In middle school or junior high, the child usually has a different teacher for each subject. In elementary school, children are rewarded for trying hard. In middle or junior high school, grades are based more on performance than on effort, young people must learn to work more independently. For such reasons, many students are temporarily disoriented during the transition between schools. Their self-esteem falters, and their grades may drop off slightly. Their interest in school activities declines. They may feel anonymous, isolated, and vulnerable. Many adolescents in industrialized countries experiment with alcohol, tobacco, and marijuana or cocaine. Adolescents may experiment with such substances because of a desire to fit in with their friends. Many adolescents see smoking, drinking, and using drugs as a key to popularity. Other reasons adolescents experiment with drugs and alcohol include boredom, and a desire to feel grown-up – that is, they see drugs as a way to prove they are adults and no longer under adult control. Young people who abuse drugs and alcohol are more likely to experience problems at school, to suffer from psychological distress and depression, to have unsafe sex, and to become involved in dangerous activities. Alcohol and drugs often contribute to automobile accidents, the leading cause of death among American teenagers. Adolescent substance abusers also expose themselves to long-term health risks that result from drug addiction or dependency. Many young Americans join organisations to help teenagers stop drinking. In some schools, students join anti-drug programmes. Young people with drug problems can also call special telephone numbers to ask for help. About one million people run away from home each year. Most return after a few weeks, but turn to crime and become juvenile delinquents. Why are young people committing crimes? Among the causes are poor family relationships (often the children were abused or neglected while growing up), bad neighbourhood conditions and peer pressure. Violations of the law are far more common among adolescents and young adults than in any other age group. Violent crimes and crimes against property peak during high school. Violent crime is a serious concern to youths as well as to adults. Adolescents are the age group most likely to become victims of such crimes as theft, robbery, rape, and assault. However, adolescents may also commit such violent crimes. Delinquents who repeatedly commit serious crimes typically come from disrupted or badly functioning families, and they frequently abuse alcohol or drugs. Many adolescent health problems result from behaviors that can be prevented. These behaviors include substance abuse, reckless driving, unprotected sex, and violence. One particular concern is sexually transmitted diseases, such as AIDS, among teenagers. Some people mistakenly consider AIDS a homosexual disease, but the virus can be transmitted from male to female or female to male. The virus is also transmitted through needles and syringes that are used in taking drugs. It may even be

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spread by tattooing or body piercing if the instruments were previously used on an infected person. The suicide rate among teen-agers has risen dramatically since the mid-1900’s. Four factors in particular place an adolescent at risk for a suicide attempt: (1) suffering from low self-esteem or an emotional problem, such as depression; (2) being under stress, especially in school or because of a romantic relationship; (3) experiencing family disruption or family conflict; and (4) having a history of suicide in the family or a friend who has committed suicide. Any threat of suicide demands immediate professional attention. Americans work hard to make their families successful. Though they face a lot of pressures, such as divorce problems, career demands, money worries, unemployment and generation gap. To adapt to these pressures the families are changing, but they are not going to disappear. Certain constants remain in family life. Among the most important is an adolescent’s need for parents who are both nurturing and demanding. This combination of warmth and strictness is associated with healthy psychological development. Children raised by loving parents who maintain clear and constant personal and social standards are more likely to have good feelings about themselves than children brought up by harsh or lax parents. Adolescents raised with both warmth and firmness are more likely to excel in school, to have close and satisfying relationships with others, and to avoid trouble with drugs and delinquency. Exercise 10. Say it in another way. somebody who has reached puberty but is not yet an adult; to state that something is better, worse, larger, more common, or more important than is true or usual; occurring or tending to be the same every day; a disagreement in which different views are expressed, often angrily; time for a teenager to come home at night; free time during which one may have a rest; influence on a person by the people of the same age group; a narcotic; confidence in your own merit as an individual; open to emotional or physical danger or harm; a state of physiological or psychological dependence on a drug liable to have a damaging effect; an act that violates a law; the people living one near the other; the act or an instance of illegally taking something that belongs to somebody else, especially by using force, threats, or violence; an unlawful threat of bodily violence or harm to somebody else, or an attempt to do such violence or harm; an instrument consisting of a piston in a small tube, used in conjunction with a hollow needle or tube for the withdrawal and ejection of fluids and for cleaning wounds; a permanent picture, design, or other markings made on the skin by pricking it and staining it with an indelible dye. Exercise 11. Explain in your own words the meaning of the following words and word-combinations and use them in sentences of your own. generation gap; minor arguments; desire for privacy; peer pressure; religious service; anonymous; abuser; to fit in with the friends; long-term health risk; juvenile delinquency; reckless driving; body piercing; suicide; unemployment. Exercise 12. Answer these questions. 1. What does generation gap mean? 2. Do you think it is often exaggerated? 3. Do you feel generation gap in your family? 4. What are the most common disagreements between parents and children in the USA? Are they the same in your country? 5. What can children – parents misunderstanding lead to? 6. What difficulties can be created by the move from elementary to high school? 7. Why do teenagers start using drugs and alcohol? 8. What is the leading cause of death among American teenagers? 9. What organisations may help teenagers stop drinking and using drugs? 10. Do we have such organisations in Russia, in our city? 11. What are the reasons of juvenile delinquency? 12. How can AIDS be transmitted? 13. What are the ways of preventing many adolescent health problems result from their behavior? 14. What factors can place an adolescent at risk for a suicide attempt? 15. What pressures do families face today? 16. Do you agree with the statement that the best parents are those who are both nurturing and demanding? Exercise 13. Find equivalents to the following words and word combinations. период полового созревания; подросток; уменьшаться; преувеличивать; повседневные проблемы; любовь, привязанность; свободное время; влияние сверстников; начальная школа; оценки; самооценка становится заниженной; ранимый; быть таким же, как все; скука;

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автокатастрофа; принятие наркотиков; наркозависимость; малолетний правонарушитель; совершить преступление; нарушать закон; возрастная группа; воровство; грабеж, разбой; изнасилование; неосторожное вождение автомобиля; венерические заболевания; СПИД; шприц; татуировка; прокалывание разных частей тела (пирсинг); попытка самоубийства; совершить самоубийство; проблемы с деньгами; нестрогие родители; хорошо успевать в школе. Exercise 14. Retell the text. Exercise 15. Our rights are based on the rules of our society and differ from country to country. Many rights depend on your age and are decided by law. Other rules are decided by your parents. Are parents strict in your country? Use these diagrams showing the results of national surveys in Britain in 1991 and the text from Listening 6 to answer the questions. Do your parents allow you to …? YES NO How old you have to be to …? Drink alcohol • vote in an election Smoke • get married Stay out all night • leave school Have friends to sleep at your house • drive a car Hold a party at home • buy alcohol Independence When children are left unattended

When allowed out on their own

before 6

before 6

6-7

6-7

8-9

8-9 10-11

10-11 12-13

12-13

14-15

14-15

16+ 0

16+ 10

20

30

40

50

0

10

20

30

40

50

ADOLESCENCE What parents allow before 18 (%) ALL GIRLS BOYS Drinking 14 13 16 Smoking 14 12 16 Girl/boyfriend stay 11 12 10 Stay out all night 29 23 34 Party at home 32 36 38 None of these 35 37 34

Source: Guardian, 1 February 1991

Source: Independent on Sunday, 4 August 1991

Questions 1. At what age are most children left on their own at home? 2. At what age do parents allow most children go out alone? 3. Do parents have the same rules for boys and girls? 4. How many young people live away from home? 5. How do these figures compare with your country? Do British parents give more or less freedom to their children than parents you know? Exercise 16. Listen to the text about the generation gap problems in Great Britain. Listening 6 Fill in the gaps in the text.

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Since the _______ teenage views of life and parents’ opinions have been in ____________, a difference is often called the generation gap. Teenagers in Britain today still say ‘Our parents don’t understand us’. By ___________________ with young people in other industrialized nations. British teenagers have a great deal of __________________ . School, _______________ and young people themselves place a lot of importance on being independent. Many teenagers have ______________ and lively social lives, and most students over ____ live and study away from home. Young people even leave home _______________ a flat with friends and this is considered a ___________ sign of independence. _______________ independence is also an important part of __________________, especially after the age of 18. In the early _________ Channel ____ featured a series of youth ________________ in a programme called _____________ . The presenters, the audience and the viewers were teenagers and the programme motto was ‘__________________________________’. The most popular topics for discussion (chosen by British teenagers) were: ____________ job, exam ___________, parents’ reaction to boyfriends or girlfriends, television programmes for young people, __________ and _________________. British parents would like to be ______________ until their children reach ____ but it seems that young Britons want to be ‘______________’ as early as possible. Over _______ the 14-16-yearolds in Britain already go to nightclubs and _________ for an alcoholic drink even though this is against the ___________. Exercise 17. Read the following letter. Quit school and left home Dear Terry, Our sixteen-year-old son has just quit school and left home. He is an only child and my husband and I have always tried to be good to him. He told us he is an adult now. He said that he was going to find an apartment somewhere, get a job and live his own life. We’ve checked and found that he has not gone to live with friends or with a girl. We want him to come back home. At least we would like to know where he is. He has not sent us an address or a phone number, and he hasn’t contacted us since he left a month ago. What should we do? Mrs. A.G. Hartford. Exercise 18. If you were Terry, what advice would you give Mrs. A.G.? Why? 1. Your son is old enough to take care of himself. 2. Don’t worry. Your son will contact you when he feels he had made a clean break. 3. Go to the police. 4. Ask your son’s friends for advice. 5. Something else? What? Exercise 19. Write a letter to Mrs. A.G. Hartford beginning with: Dear Mrs. Hartford, Of course you are worried about your son, but ... Exercise 20. Give your reasons: 1. Have you ever read letters like these in newspapers or magazines? 2. Would you ever write to a magazine about a problem? 3. Do you find letters like this amusing? 4. Do you think letters like this are real, or do magazine writers make them up? 5. Do you think that advice in column like this should be taken seriously? Exercise 21. Discuss the following problems with your group-mates. 1. Why do teenagers run away from home? 2. What do you think about jobs that involve listening to other people’s problems and giving advice (marriage councillor, guidance councillor, psychiatrist). Would you like a job like this? Why? Why not? 3. Sometimes people say, “Don’t tell me your problems. I have enough of my own. Do you think that this is a common attitude in today’s world? Relate an incident to prove what you say.

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Exercise 22. Read these extracts from interviews with teenagers in Britain for National Opinion Polls in 1991. Write one sentence for each person to describe what they are allowed or not allowed to do.

Young voices, old problems ALISON, aged 16, from Bath: I’m going out tonight to a club and it will be 3 am before I get in. I have just finished my GCSEs so my parents won’t mind so long as HANNAH, 14, Golders Green, they know I’m catching a taxi north-west London: when I was home and what time I will be eight I was allowed out on my own in. I started going to clubs as long as it was not far and my when I was 14. Sometimes I parents knew where I was. used to get into arguments Normally I was allowed to stay out with my parents about it. until dark. My parents have never Although I’ve been going in hit me. If I am naughty they sit me pubs since I was 14, I don’t down and explain why I was wrong drink a lot. and ask why I did it. JEREMY, 16, from Glasgow: CLAIRE, 16, from Goole: I am an I think I’ve had a clear sense only child so I am spoilt. I don’t of what’s right and wrong really feel I have any restrictions at since I was 10. I’ve been all. As far as drugs or real drinking is living with an older cousin concerned, my mum knows I would and his wife for the past year. never do anything like that anyway. There are rules, like during She trusts me and I do not let her the week when there’s school, down. I will definitely be stricter. I in bed by 12, no smoking in get away with murder but my kids the flat. I think I’m a lot will not. harder on myself now than I was when I was younger. Source: Independent on Sunday, 4 August 1991 Exercise 23. Answer the following questions. 1. Who has the strictest parents in your opinion? 2. Do these teenagers have to be home earlier or later than you? 3. Are you allowed to do the same things? 4. Do you think it is dangerous to allow tenyear-olds out on their own without an adult? 5. Are your parents stricter than the parents of these teenagers? Exercise 24. Speak about the problems of generation gap in Great Britain and in Russia. Exercise 25. Comment on the proverbs. 1. Seven baby-sitters can’t say why their only baby lost her eye. 2. Don’t teach your granny to suck eggs. 3. As the tree, so the fruit (Like mother, like daughter). 4. As you sow, you shall mow. Exercise 26. Read and translate the following text. • Pre-reading task: find the meaning of the following words and practise their pronunciation: in consequence, docile, prone, frustration, adult, hence, docility, to flourish, pals, to thrive, aloof, recreation, status, adolescence, urban, yearning, embittered, dignity, physician, flatly, meanness. THE DIFFICULT CHILD The difficult child is the child who is unhappy. He is at war with himself, and in consequence, he is at war with the world. A difficult child is nearly always made difficult by wrong treatment at home. The moulded, conditioned child, the child who is disciplined and repressed – the unfree child, whose name is a Legion, lives in every corner of the world. He lives in our town just across the street, ANDREA, 13, from Finchley, north-west London: My mum let me out on my own when I was about 10 – I could go anywhere really, as long as I let her know. I always had to be back by about 7 pm. My mum will slap me across the face if I am rude to her. KRISTY, aged 17, from York: I think years ago there were so many restrictions and my mum was brought up really badly. She’s 37 now. She was not allowed to go anywhere or do anything, which is why she got married at 16, just to get away. I go to nightclubs and pubs, even though I shouldn’t. My mum likes me to be in by about one o’clock in the morning and she never goes to sleep before I am in. She doesn’t say I have to be in by then, but I am.

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he sits at a dull desk in a dull school, and later he sits at a duller desk in an office or on a factory bench. He is docile, prone to obey authority, fearful of criticism, and almost fanatical in his desire to be conventional and correct. He accepts what he has been taught almost without questions; and he hands down all his complexes and fears and frustrations to his children. Adults take it for granted that a child should be taught to behave in such a way that the adults will have as quiet a life as possible. Hence the importance attached to obedience, to manner, to docility. The usual argument against freedom for children is this: life is hard, and we must train the children so that they will fit into life later on. We must therefore discipline them. If we allow them to do what they like, how will they ever be able to serve under a boss? How will they ever be able to exercise self-discipline? “To impose anything by authority is wrong. Obedience must come from within – not be imposed from without.” The problem child is the child who is pressured into obedience and persuaded through fear. Fear can be a terrible thing in a child’s life. Fear must be entirely eliminated – fear of adults, fear of punishment, fear of disapproval. Only hate can flourish in the atmosphere of fear. The happiest homes are those in which the parents are frankly honest with their children without moralising. Fear does not enter these homes. Father and son are pals. Love can thrive. In other homes love is crushed by fear. Pretentious dignity and demanded respect hold love aloof. Compelled respect always implies fear. The happiness and well-being of children depend on a degree of love and approval we give them. We must be on the child’s side. Being on the side of the child is giving love to the child – not possessive love – not sentimental love – just behaving to the child in such a way the child feels you love him and approve of him. Home plays many parts in the life of the growing child, it is the natural source of affection, the place where he can live with the sense of security; it educates him in all sorts of ways, provides him with his opportunities of recreation, it affects his status in society. Children need affection. Of all the functions of the family that of providing an affectionate background for childhood and adolescence has never been more important than it is today. Child study has enabled us to see how necessary affection is in ensuring proper emotional development; and the stresses and strains of growing up in modern urban society have the effect of intensifying the yearning parental regard. The childhood spent with heartless, indifferent or quarrelsome parents or in a broken home makes a child permanently embittered. Nothing can compensate for lack of parental affection. When the home is a loveless one, the children are impersonal and even hostile. Approaching adolescence children become more independent of their parents. They are now more concerned with what other kids say or do. They go on loving their parents underneath, but they don’t show it on the surface. They no longer want to be loved as a possession or as an appealing child. They are gaining a sense of dignity as individuals, and they like to be treated as such. They develop a stronger sense of responsibility about matters that they think are important. From their need to be less dependent on their parents, they turn more to trust adults outside the family for ideas and knowledge. In adolescence aggressive feelings become much stronger. In this period, children will play an earnest game of war. There may be arguments roughhousing and even real fights. Is gun-play good or bad for children? For many years educators emphasised its harmlessness, even when thoughtful parents expressed doubt about letting their children have pistols and other warlike toys. It was assumed that in the course of growing up children have a natural tendency to bring their aggressiveness more and more under control. But nowadays educators and physicians would give parents more encouragement in their inclination to guide children away from violence on screen. The world famous Dr. Bahjamin Spock has this to say in the new edition of his book for parents about children care: “Many evidences made me think that Americans have often been tolerant of harshness, lawlessness and violence, as well as of brutality on screen. Some children can only partly

41

distinguish between dramas and reality. I believe that parent should flatly forbid programmes that go in for violence. I also believe that parents should firmly stop children’s war-play or any other kind of play that generates into deliberate cruelty or meanness. One can’t be permissive about such things. To me it seems very clear that we should bring up the next generation with a greater respect for law and for other people’s rights.” Exercise 27. Answer the following questions. 1. What makes a child unhappy? 2. Why do you think a child who, according to the text “sits at a dull desk at school” will later sit “at a duller desk in his office”? What is implied here? 3. Why do many adults attach such importance to obedience? Is it really in the child’s interests? 4. What are the usual arguments put forward against giving more freedom to the child? Are the arguments wellfounded? 5. Why is it wrong to pressure a child into obedience? 6. What kinds of fear does a child experience? 7. What kind of atmosphere is necessary for child’s proper emotional development? 8. What new traits and habits emerge in adolescence? 9. How and why did Dr. Spock’s attitude change regarding the adolescents games of war? 10. Why is it so dangerous for children to be exposed to violence? 11. How should the new generation be brought up? Exercise 28. Summarise the text in three paragraphs specifying the following: 1. The prime importance of home in the upbringing of children. 2. The negative and harmful role of fears in a child’s life. 3. The impact of aggressive gun-play on children’s character. Exercise 29. Below are the statements expressing different opinions. Imagine that you are expressing these opinions, try to make them sound convincing, hold your line. 1. The parents’ permissiveness breeds contempt in children. 2. The child is born selfish and he will need the best part of his life to get over it. 3. Popularity and success in life seldom come to totally self-centred people. 4. Enjoying things is essential to a child’s development. 5. Enjoying comes mostly from using skills for real achievement. 6. Enjoyment may come not only from personal experience but also from passive enjoyment. Exercise 30. Read the text, answer the questions given below. THE BELL FAMILY CHARTER Housework: All members of the family must do an equal share of the housework according to age and ability. A list of duties will be put up each week. Free time: Children and parents have an equal right to free time. Visitors: Children have a right to bring friends home whenever they like. Bedtime: Bedtime will be fixed according to age. Children of 15 may go to bed when they like. Rules for parents: Parents must not break promises. Parents must not cancel plans suddenly. Parents must not criticise their children in public. N.B. Parents are not always right. a) What is your opinion of the charter? b) What does it imply? c) Do you agree or disagree with the following statements? What are the arguments for and against each one? 1. Boys should do so much work as girls do. 2. Small children should be given job too. 3. Children should be given as much free time as adults. 4. Parents must not do anything to upset their children. d) Talk it over: 1. What duties do parents have that children don’t? 2. How will you bring up your children? Exercise 31. Team with your partner and discuss the following rules for parents. Extend on the items given below.

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1. Take a good look at yourself; consciously or unconsciously children pattern themselves on their parents. If you have certain traits you don’t want your children to inherit, make a constant effort to get rid of these qualities. In other words, one of the most effective ways to child control is selfcontrol. 2. Be relaxed. If you are ill at ease with children, they know it and become uneasy themselves. Children are very sensitive to tension. 3. Assert your authority. From the beginning try to make it clear to the children that while you love them and make any reasonable sacrifices for them, they are not rulers and have limited privileges and definite obligations. 4. Don’t expect miracles. The rule is particularly important in trying to cope with children. It is both unfair and unwise to expect miracles in dealing with children. Unfair, because very often they simply haven’t reached that level of achievement yet. And unwise, because if you constantly demand more than a child can give, you damage his confidence and may even end by making doubt his value as a human being. Modern children grow physically and mentally very fast. But their rate of emotional growth is the same as it was always. 5. Be consistent. Few things upset a child more than indecisive and erratic treatment from two people who represent law and order and stability in his world – his parents. (From: “The secret World of Kids” by A. Linkletter) P A R T 3 GROUP WORK Exercise 1. Work in pairs or in small groups. Discuss problems of children upbringing outlined in the extracts below. A. Timidity is another common personal defect in children. A reasonable amount of timidity is normal enough. But some children are more fearful than others. Don’t force the child to face his fears! Most children outgrow their timidity. B. Selfishness. Many parents complain that their children are self-centred, never think of anyone but themselves. Have no sense of responsibility. Won’t share things and so on... Selfishness is often prolonged in kids by parents who tend to make slaves of themselves for the children’s benefit. C. Permissiveness. It is high time to stop being permissive to children. It is urgent to change your attitude and learn to take a stand and be tough in your love. Exercise 2. Work in groups of three or four. Decide which of the following statements you agree or disagree with. Discuss these with the other members of your group. Be ready to report your discussion to other groups: 1. There’s never a problem child, there are only problem parents. 2. Anyone who expects quick results in child upbringing is an incurable optimist. 3. Under dictatorial control adolescents work submissively, show little initiative. 4. Happiness may be defined as the state of minimal repression. 5. Healthy children do not fear future, they anticipate it gladly. 6. The adults who fear that youth will be corrupted by freedom are those who are corrupt themselves. Exercise 3. Pair work. Agree or disagree with the statements below. Be sure to provide sound arguments. Consider the following points and extend them whenever possible. a) Children are not supposed to have their opinions, but if they do, the adults ignore them. b) The difference between a child and an adult amounts to achieving the state of independence. c) The most painful time is adolescence with intense feelings, lack of confidence and rebellion against authority. d) The essence of happiness is complete freedom from care. e) Most adults think of their childhood as happiest time. Exercise 4. Group discussion. “New Prospects in Education”. Here are a number of predictions which have been made by futurologists. 1. In his book Alvin Toggler suggests that in future there will be advertisements like the one below.

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DON’T WORRY ABOUT PARENTHOOD! We’ll bring out your children and make them into responsible, successful adults. 1. Excellent food and education. 2. Just visit your children once a week. 3. Minimum five-year contract. • Would you like your children to be brought up by “professional parents”? • What would be some advantages and disadvantages? • Would you like your children to be brought up by “professional” parents? 2. Alvin Toggler also suggests that children won’t go to school. They will study at home instead with video-tape, cassettes, other electronic aids. • Would you like this arrangement? • What do you think of such “electronic cottage” school? • Imagine what some of the consequences might be. 3. In what way, do you think, the advertisement above reflects the new trends in child rearing? RECOMMENDED TOPICS FOR EXAM

1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6.

Russian family pattern. How different it is from the family patterns in other countries. Family patterns existing in the English speaking countries. Challenges and opportunities of modern families. The role and functions of a family in one’s life. Family pattern and gender roles. Engagement and marriage traditions and superstitions in our country and in other countries of the world. 7. Families with many children versus families with one child. 8. Having a divorce. Problems of one-parent families. 9. Is it necessary to provide a “Conjugal Preparation Course” for high school students? Why? How can they help in their future family life? 10. Positive and negative sides of Marriage Contracts. Marriage contracts and romantic love. 11. Generation gap. What does it mean for parents and children? Do the problems of Fathers and sons differ in various countries? 12. Problems of children upbringing. Difficult children. 13. An ideal way of children’s’ upbringing. Punishment and permissiveness.

P A R T 4 SUPPLEMENT TEXT 1 Exercise 1. Read the following text about old Russian matchmaking traditions. • Pre-reading task: find the meaning of the following words and practise their pronunciation: splendid, to absorb, banquet, preliminary, mediator, suitor, to pray, intractable, refreshments, dowry, to anticipate, rouge, comb, scissors, thread, delicacies, to bless, prosperously. Matchmaking In all cultures the most colourful, festive and splendid festival is a wedding. It has absorbed many time-honoured customs and is celebrated over a few days or even a week. Everything about it is interesting, from the choice of bride and the matchmaking process to the wedding ceremony and the banquet table. It would be difficult to describe everything at once, therefore in this article we will concentrate on the first stage only – the matchmaking. Beforehand it should be said that we are, not talking about a modern wedding which as a rule consists of only a registry marriage and dinner, but an ancient ceremony.

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In olden times a wedding ceremony in Russia was carried out thus: the parents of a son of marriageable age would take advice from close relatives and send a matchmaker to the parents of a prospective bride for preliminary talks. If the parents did not want their daughter to marry they would usually say that she was still too young. If they were willing, they would not agree at once, instead they would set a final date for a final answer so that nobody would think that they wanted to give their daughter away as soon as possible to the first person that came by. After receiving the preliminary agreement, the matchmaker or mediator would ask permission to see the future bride. Often the mother of the suitor would come to do this. They would talk to the girl trying to find out whether she was intelligent and what she was capable of doing. It was only after this inspection or “smotriny” as this is called, that the betrothal would take place. The matchmaking itself was the first part of the wedding festival. The day for matchmaking was always set by the bride’s parents. The matchmaker was usually the eldest in the family or the godfather. He would dress up festively and go to the bride’s house. He would open the door in three movements. Twice he would half open it and then close it tightly, and on the third go he would open it wide. On entering the house he would pray to God, bow to the hosts and sit in silence until the host would ask the reason for his arrival. Sometimes the hosts would be forewarned and would come out to meet their guests and would receive them and honour them and seat them in an honoured place. Then after pausing the matchmaker would start to talk about the reason for his visit and to praise the suitor, saying only good things about him. That is how the first matchmaking starts. If the father of the girl does not want to give her up for marriage, he tells the matchmaker: “I do not have a daughter of marriageable age, go and look in another homestead. But if you want to come and see me, please do”. The matchmaker continues to visit the intractable father until he obtains an agreement. Maybe for this reason, in the beginning the matchmakers were not served with anything at the bride’s house, even though they might be sitting there for three hours. Not until the agreed day for a final agreement does the matchmaker have some wine and a fish pie at the suitor’s house and then he goes to the bride’s house accompanied by relatives. The father of the bride pretends to disagree, but household members remind him of the importance of having given his word, and he, finally, agrees. After that the matchmaker places some refreshments on the table which he has brought with him, and the father of the bride orders a candle to be lit and bread and salt to be brought. He then invites everyone to sit round the table. During the betrothal the dates of the wedding are discussed, it may be in a week’s time or after a few months. They talk about the dowry too, which is delivered to the newlyweds’ home after the wedding. The bride is not present at the actual betrothal. When her parents and the matchmaker come to an agreement, her relatives give the suitor and the matchmaker gifts in her name. If the suitor was to break his word after the betrothal that would mean disgrace for the family of the bride. From the day of the betrothal to the wedding, no matter how the time may be prolonged, the suitor and prospective bride may not see each other. However this does not mean that nothing happens during this time. Both families are engaged in preparations. One of the main preparations is to assemble the wedding procession, in other words those who will accompany the bridegroom. The main wedding official is the tysiachsky. He has to anticipate the bridegroom’s actions so the wedding ceremony and the banquet will not be disturbed by anything. After him followed the sponsor father and mother (if there were no blood relatives). They blessed the bridegroom at the wedding and gave the bride away. Each family selected two best men and two matchmakers from amongst the married women in the family. On the eve of the wedding the bridegroom’s guests gathered at his house and the bride’s guests gathered at her house and they celebrated by feasting. According to custom, during this time the bridegroom would send the bride a hat, boots and a small chest with rouge, rings, a comb and a mirror. A pair of scissors, needles, thread and delicacies together with a birch rod would be sent separately. These were symbolic signs which meant that if the young wife was diligent she would be fed and cared for, but if she was lazy she would be beaten with a birch rod. At the time the bride was supposed to sit at home, cry and prepare hand-made gifts for the

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bridegroom and his family. On the last day before the wedding the bride has her plait undone and is led to the bathhouse having been blessed by her parents. The bride bows at everyone’s feet and they return singing songs and on entering the house they ask the father to bless his daughter and her future life far away. The father blesses his daughter and she gives him a gift. The bride makes similar requests of her mother, uncles, aunts, brothers, sisters and all adult household members. Having received a blessing from everyone she gives them all gifts. Then the bride’s female friends plait her hair for the last time with ribbons and accompany this with singing. On the day before the wedding, at the bridegroom’s house the floor is washed clean and scattered with straw. This symbolises the hope that the bridegroom and his bride will live prosperously in the house, meaning not bare. Exercise 2. Use the following words and word combinations in the sentences of your own: a colourful festival; time-honoured customs; choice; matchmaking process; banquet table; registry-marriage; prospective; preliminary talks; to set a date; to close smth. tightly; to praise smth. or smb.; to obtain an agreement; to be accompanied by smb.; to light a candle; dowry; disgrace; to be engaged in smth.; to assemble smth.; to disturb; diligent; hand-made gifts; to scatter smth.; to live prosperously. Exercise 3. Say it in another way. a special occasion, ceremony; an established habit; a marriage ceremony; showing power of learning or understanding; to speak to god; to tell smb. about smth. beforehand; a house and its surrounding land; food and drinks served as a light meal; not to fulfil a promise; to ask God’s favour or protection for. Exercise 4. Answer the following questions: 1. What festival is considered to be the most festive and colourful in all cultures? 2. What part of the wedding ceremony is the text under study devoted to? 3. Is the old Russian wedding ceremony different from the modern one? 4. What parts does the modern wedding ceremony consist of? 5. What did the parents of a son of a marriageable age do? 6. Why didn’t the parents of a future bride agree at once to marry their daughter? 7. What was the reason of the old Russian tradition of ‘smotriny’? 8. When was it possible for the matchmaker to receive some refreshments? 9. How can you explain the word ‘dowry’? 10. What happened if the suitor broke his word after the betrothal? 11. May the suitor and the prospective bride see each other from the day of the betrothal to the wedding? 12. Where did all the guests gather on the eve of the wedding? 13. What did the bridegroom send to the bride during this time? 14. What was the meaning of sending to the bride a pair of scissors, needles, thread, delicacies and a birch rod? 15. What was the bride doing during all this time? 16. In what way was the bridegroom’s house prepared on the day before the wedding? What for? PROBLEM PAGE Sometimes, people who are worried by a personal problem write to a ‘Problem Page’ of a newspaper or magazine for advice 1. a) What would you expect a letter headed ‘Moody Gran’ to be about? b) To see if you were right, read the letter. As you read, try to underline the important words. Those in the first sentence have already been underlined. MOODY GRAN My gran’s moods are very changeable. my mother still sees her about every three or Sometimes she can be very domineering and four weeks. Occasionally she has outbursts difficult, at other times she’ll be pleasant and about me and tells mum I’m no good. Other quite happy. But whichever it is, the good is relatives have had this treatment and have never quite as good as it might be and the bad is moved away or lost contact. My mother tells me always worse –whenever my mother or I are about her visits and I feel weighed down just by involved, frankly she seems happier to hear listening. But I feel guilty. She’s my about our problems than our successes. I haven’t grandmother, not getting any younger and I’m seen very much of her since I married, although taking the easy way out by not going to visit her.

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Words which seem to give information which is essential are known as key words. Picking out key words helps to summarise a passage. For instance, the problem in the above letter can be summarized: The writer feels guilty because she doesn’t visit her grandmother, who can be very unpleasant. 2. a) The next letter is headed ‘Boyfriend’s Dreadful’. What do you think it might be about? b) While reading the letter to check, underline no more than 14 key words in the letter, so that the underlined words explain the writer’s problem. BOYFRIEND’S DREADFUL I expect you will think I am a silly, over-loving mother, but I am worried about my 16-year-old daughter. She is meeting a boy of 20 who is really dreadful. He has no education, is well-known for being petty thief and is generally a loutish and unsavoury character. She is our only child, and has been sensible until now. What can we do? 3. Which of these sentences best summarises her problem? a. She loves her daughter too much and is being over-protective. b. She’s afraid that her daughter is going to marry a thief c. She’s worried about her daughter having an unsuitable boyfriend. d. She is a silly woman, worried over something which is not important. 4. a) The next letter is headed ‘I want to be me!’ What could it be about? b) As you read it, underline not more than 15 key words which together summarise her problem. I WANT TO BE ME! the strength of character or confidence to help I’m worried because at 23 I feel as if I’m just myself. I’ve no friends and I lean on my an extension of my mother. My personality is mother for everything, mentally and being suppressed inside, waiting to be materially. I thought about getting a job developed. All my family are out-going, but abroad, anything that would take me away I’m an introvert. When I do think of from her so I’d have to stand up for myself. something to say, I usually miss the Do you think that might work – that I’ll be opportunity to say it. I’ve tried joining clubs able to establish my own identity if my but Mum just worried about me going alone. I mother’s not around? don’t want to live in her shadow, but I haven’t 5. Write a sentence summarising the problem. The key words will help. 6. a) The next letter is headed ‘Who has first call?’. Do you have any idea at all what the letter might be about? b) As you read the letter, underline not more than 30 key words which summarise the writer’s problem WHO HAS FIRST CALL? live long. When we telephoned New Jersey My husband and I are teachers – both in our they were sympathetic but said we must either early 20s. We have been offered, and have keep our date, or they must find two other accepted, an exchange job in New Jersey. We teachers. This means we may never get would have all expenses paid and the two another chance and it is so sad as it meant American teachers who are replacing us in prestige and extra money for my husband. I London have offered us their flat in New am very torn. I want to stay with my poor Jersey, while they live in our house. We have mother, but the doctors warn me that she may been very excited, but now there has been a linger on as she is, or be a permanent invalid. I catastrophe. My widowed mother was in a car am desperate. Who has first call? What I accident and is now in hospital. She is in a decide to do will affect my husband, and coma but could come out of it, and then she ought I not consider him? They want us as a would depend on me taking complete care of pair – we would have to work together. her, although it’s not thought that she would

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8. Now compare your version with that of your friends. Have you underlined different words? Which version is best? 9. Write two or three sentences summarising the problem. Do not write more than 45 words. 10. Look at the last letter again. Working with two or three others, list all the possible solutions you can think of. Decide which of these you favour. Then write an answer to the letter, in which you advise the woman what she should do. TEXT 2 Exercise 1. Read and translate the text about the old Russian wedding ceremony. • Pre-reading task: find the meaning of the following words and practise their pronunciation: splendour, nuptial, vow, suite, melodiousness, source, sew, jewellery, icon, loaf, maiden, garland, to swap, hop, sleigh, satin, velvet, to weave, veil, sermon, grain, ear, obedience, coin. Russian Wedding The modern wedding consists of the registration of the marriage, the wedding procession, dinner and honeymoon. But in the following text we shall speak about the old wedding tradition, with all its splendour, colourfulness and ceremony. Many of these traditions are thankfully coming back at the moment. And so, the day before the wedding itself, the last pre-nuptial parties – the stag and hen party – take place. On the day of the ceremony, the groom with his best men goes to the bride and gives the financial compensation for her. After the wedding vows, the young couple are met with bread and salt on the threshold of the house, and the guests shower them with coins and wheat. After the feast, they are accompanied to the bridal suite and woken the next morning. And all this is accompanied by songs, jokes and farewell speeches, which are so rich and colourful that it is practically impossible to translate them into another language while keeping the sense, subtext, and melodiousness. But let us return to the source, to the traditions themselves, only a part of which we still observe nowadays. When the time for the ceremony was approaching, the bride would be dressed in her most beautiful dress, on which would be sewn as much expensive jewellery as possible. This was always accompanied by the singing of special wedding songs. At the same time the tables would be set, covered with tablecloths and at the head would be prepared the places for the bride and groom. An icon would be placed above this spot, as well as an icon in each of the four corners. In the meantime, the groom would be being dressed in his wedding costume in his parents’ house. The priest was earlier always amongst the groom’s guests. When everything was ready in the bride’s house, she would be led with ceremonial-dances into the room where the meeting with the groom was to take place. Round loaves on which gold coins were placed were carried in front. Then came the candlesticks with candles on which silver rings had been put. The groom’s candlesticks and round loaves were carried in front of him, while he was going to the bride. One person walked on each side and made sure that no one crossed their path. And only after them walked the bride. She would be placed on the spot designed for her, and her brother or another relative would be stood beside her. Only then would someone send for the groom and tell him that the bride was ready. When the groom’s parents got this news, they would pick up an icon which had been placed nearby. He would bow to their feet, kiss the icon, and be blessed. After this, the wedding procession would set off for the bride’s house. Her parents would meet the groom and lead him into the room where the bride was. On going in, the groom would bow to all four sides and go to his place. But as traditional joke, this place would be occupied by the bride’s younger brother who would leave only after the compensation had been paid. After all this, the food would be laid on the table. The guests ate not in order to satisfy their hunger, but in order to honour the hosts. After the light meal, the maiden’s garland on the bride’s head was swapped for a woman’s headdress. One of the guests, dressed in a fur coat, would come up to her and wish her as many children as there were hairs in the fur. And the matchmaker would shower the young couple and the guests with silver coins and hops. Then the bride’s parents and the priest would bless the newlyweds while holding an icon in their hands, and the couple would go to give their vows.

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Sometimes the father would gently hit his daughter with a lash and say “Now the power over you is going to another” and would give the lash to the groom. He would take it and answer: “I accept, but I think that I will have no need for the lash”. The sleigh, decorated with satin, velvet, foxtails, and ribbons, was already waiting in the courtyard. The bride and groom would go to the church in separate sleighs or carriages, and the groom had to arrive before the bride. The way from the church gates to the place where the vows were made would be covered with weaves or carpets. After the vows, the bride’s veil was removed and the priest read a sermon, placed the bride’s hand, in the groom’s and told them to kiss. Then the priest gave them a cup of wine, from which each of them drunk three times. The husband, finishing the wine, threw the cup down and the couple would together stamp on it, repeating “Let us in the same way stamp on those who try to part us”. The priest broke the round bread into two parts and they were given to each set of parents as a sign that both families were now of the same table and would live in friendship, as two grains of wheat from the same ear. The young couple would set off from the church to the husband’s house, where the groom’s parents were waiting with bread and salt. According to custom, the bride was supposed to cry a little bit at the table, expressing her sadness to be parted from her parents. Despite the fact that all sorts of food were laid in front of them, neither the bride nor the groom was supposed to eat or drink anything. After the third course, the young couple were led off to rest. Holding each other by the hand, the husband and wife went to the specially prepared wedding suite. The custom of taking one’s shoes off was observed. The wife had to take her husband’s boots off as a sign of her obedience, and a coin had been placed in one of the boots. If she took this boot off first it meant that her married life would be happy. In the morning, the husband and wife were led to the baths with songs. They washed separately and the young wife with her husband went together to the bride’s house. The young husband thanked her parents for bringing up his wife and invited them to his place for a celebratory feast. And on the third day the feasting at bride’s house began. Here the guests gave presents to the newlyweds and then in the course of the next year the groom was supposed to give them back presents of equal value. The customs associated with weddings were the same whether people were getting married for the first, second or third time. Although of course the church tried not to allow to get married a third time. It was also customary to celebrate wedding anniversaries. There are seven special ones, and each one has a special name. Those who had lived together for one year celebrated their cotton anniversary, for five years – wooden, seven years – bronze, twenty-five years – silver, forty years – ruby, fifty years – golden, and those who got to seventy five years together celebrated their Crown of State anniversary. Exercise 3. Say it in another way. a marriage ceremony; a party for men only; a party for women only; a wedding promise or declaration; a piece of metal, flat and round made by government for use as money; body and dress decoration; a single mass of bread, shaped and backed in one piece; a circle of flowers, leaves or both; to scatter smb. or smth. with smth.; a large horse-drawn vehicle with slides along show on two metal blades; the head of grain-producing plant; a covering of thin material or net for the head or face. Exercise 4. Answer the following questions. 1. What is called a honeymoon? 2. What parties took place in old Russia before the wedding day? 3. Describe a usual wedding dress of a Russian girl. 4. In what way did the bride and her relatives meet the groom on the day of the wedding? 5. What was a traditional joke when meeting a groom in the bride’s house? 6. What traditional actions took place in old Russia after the compensation for the bride had been paid? 7. What was the meaning of a round loaf of bread broken in two parts? 8. What did the participants of the wedding ceremony do on the third day of the wedding? 9. Was the wedding tradition the same for the people getting married the second or the third time? 10. What wedding ceremonies are traditionally celebrated in Russia? Exercise 5. Give the summary of the text.

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TEXT 3 The Indian Wife There are various ways by which to comprehend the culture of another country. One can sing the praises of its beautiful ancient temples and the greatness of its eternal literary tradition, or one can look into the world of a different culture by looking at ...the wife. How do her husband, her children and society behave towards her? How does she perceive herself and what does she strive for? And if I can even in a cursory way answer these questions then it will help some people to understand better and feel closer to the beguiling and enigmatic country of India. Of course, one should not forget that India is a country where people of many religions and nationalities live side by side, and my account tries to describe a typical Indian wife who belongs to an upper middle class and caste. For many centuries, the role-models for a wife have been the heroic and self-sacrificing wives of an ancient Indian epic poems, the Ramayan and the Mahabharat. The legend of Ghangjari, who covered her eyes with a blindfold for the rest of her life when she learned that she was to be married to the blind man, is passed down from generation to generation. The name of Savitri is always linked to the proverb about the ideal, utterly devoted wife. She ceaselessly pursued the god of death Yamu, until he gave her husband’s life back. The modern-day Indian woman is the same – her existence is utterly devoted to her husband’s needs, he is a god to her and her life finds real purpose next to him. It is for this reason that in many Indian languages a married woman is referred to by the term which means “possessing a happy fate”. Her “happy fate” refers to a whole range of things – an engagement necklace, arm bracelets, rings for her toes, a nose ring and, of course, a red head-dress and a red spot on her forehead. The absence of the neck-lace, the bracelets or the red spot shows she is a widow – a bitter and unenviable fate. So if spot on the forehead has got pale or has smudged, people hint at it rather than talk about it directly in order not to invoke misfortune. The everyday life of a wife is filled with concerns about her husband and his well-being: at all times she must radiate a welcoming air, carefully look after the home, spend money wisely and together with her husband, look after the children and the mother and father-in-law. In the morning she makes strong tea with milk and then wakes her husband. While her husband is rousing from sleep and enjoying the fragrant drink she prepares water for his morning wash and lays out clean clothes for him, lays out the breakfast and packs lunch in metal lunch-boxes which the husband and children will take to work and school. She herself can only eat once her husband is fed, and in the most orthodox families, from the same tray, where the loving husband puts aside some not too bad pieces from his meal. When the husband is late coming back, his wife awaits his arrival with everything prepared and her hunger retreats before her feeling of duty. The wife rises before her husband and goes to bed after him; she does not sit until he has sat down and she tries to sit in such a way that she is below her husband. She must not walk in front of her husband, but a little behind him and never enters anywhere first. It simply never comes into her mind to express her disapproval in company, and she will ask advice of her husband on the smallest of matters. Her husband’s taste is the decisive factor in her choice of clothes and jewellery. And whereas such a situation may seem unenviable to someone with European views, the Indian woman relishes it. Once my Indian friend was complaining about how his wife had gone to stay with her mother for a while: “While she is not here I haven’t once drunk reasonable tea, I don’t have any idea where my socks are and when I come back from work I don’t have anyone to tell my problems to!” I. Glushkova Exercise 1. Answer the following question. 1. How can you characterise India? Do you like this country? Why? 2. What Indian traditions do you know? 3. What is considered to be a role-model for an Indian wife? 4. What do you like in this model and what you don’t? Why? 5. In what way is a married woman referred to in many Indian languages? Do you think that it is also true for women of European countries? 6. What things are characteristic to a married woman in India? 7. What do they or their absence symbolise? 8. Describe a day of an Indian wife. 9. What national traditions should a wife in India follow? 10. Do husbands in India appreciate love, care and devotion of their wives? 11. What characteristic features of Indian marriage do you like? 12. Which of them you don’t like? Why? 13. Would you be able to follow such

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requirements? 14. What of the peculiarities of Indian wife’s behaviour do you consider might be useful for European women? Why? Exercise 2. Find some additional information about family life of different peoples of the world. Use the information below as an example. A Arabs strongly value family ties and hospitality. Traditionally, Arabs have placed great importance on belonging to family or kinship groups, including the extended family, clan, and tribe. An extended family includes members of two or more generations, many of them sharing one home. A clan consists of several related families. A tribe might include hundreds of families. In the past, most social and even many business activities took place within these groups. Often, parents sought marriage partners for their children within the clan or tribe. The kinship system also stressed hospitality as a source of honor. A host who richly entertained a guest raised the standing of the entire tribe. Today, some kinship ties have loosened, especially in the cities. The impact of Western values and the need for some people to move far from home to earn a living have tended to weaken family relationships. But for many Arabs, the family continues to be the main source of social and economic support. Many rural Arabs still live in extended families, and even most city dwellers live near relatives. Many Arab children are raised by grandparents, aunts, uncles, and other relatives in addition to their parents. It is still common for parents to arrange their children’s marriages. Traditionally, women formed the focus of family life. They supervised the raising of children, the preparation of meals, and the organizing of family celebrations. In some countries, economic pressures and educational opportunities have led a growing number of women to work outside the home. B Family life has always been extremely important in Chinese culture. Before 1949, some Chinese lived in large family units. As many as 100 or more relatives lived together under the rule of the oldest male. The ideal was “five generations under one roof.” However, those who lived this way were mainly the families of rich rural landowners, wealthy merchants, and government officials. Among the common people, most households consisted of only parents and children, but some also included grandparents and uncles. Today, the Chinese live in these smaller types of family units. In the past, only men were expected to work outside the home. But today, almost all adults have a job. In many families, a grandparent looks after the house and children during the day. More and more children attend nursery school and kindergarten so that both parents can be free to work. Relationships within Chinese families have become less formal and more democratic. Parents no longer expect their children to show unquestioning obedience. In the past, a father could legally kill his children if they disobeyed him. Young people today generally choose their own marriage partners on the basis of shared interests and mutual attraction. However, parents still play a role in arranging some marriages, especially in rural areas. Any couple would at least consult their parents about such a major decision. Chinese families traditionally valued sons far more than daughters. A husband could divorce his wife if she failed to give birth to sons. In some cases, daughters were killed at birth because girls were considered useless. Today, social policy in China stresses that girls as well as boys are valued. The Communist government strongly supports the idea that women should contribute to the family income and participate in social and political activities. Women do many kinds of work outside the home. Many young husbands share in the shopping, housecleaning, cooking, and caring for the children to show that they believe the sexes are equal. However, equality between the sexes is more widely accepted in the cities than in the countryside.

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СПИСОК ИСПОЛЬЗОВАННОЙ ЛИТЕРАТУРЫ 1. Encarta Encyclopedia Deluxe 2003. © & → Microsoft Corporation 2. World Book Encyclopedia. © 2000 World Book, Inc. 3. Bromhead Peter. Life in Modem America. Longman, 1996. 4. Bromhead Peter. Life in Modern Britain. Longman, 1995. 5. McDowall David. Britain in Close-up. Longman, 2000 6. Laverly Clare. Focus on Britain Today. Phoenix ELT, 1993 7. O’Driscoll James. Britain. Oxford University Press, 1997 8. Ramsey Gaynor, LoCastro Virginia. Talking Topics. Longman, 1997. 9. Практический курс английского языка под ред. B.Д. Apaкинa. M., 1998. 10. Разговорный английский язык. Войтенок В.М., Войтенко А.М. М., 1994 11. Методические указания по обучению чтению и устной речи на английском языке студентов университета по специальности «социономия». Составитель доц. Кузнецова О.А., РГУ, Ростов-на-Дону, 1994 12. Меркулова Е.М. и др. Английский язык для студентов университетов. – Санкт-Петербург: Союз, 2001 13. Сидоров Е.А. По Лондону и Великобритании. Учебное пособие на английском языке. Ростов-на-Дону, 1995 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6.

АУДИРОВАНИЕ Dialogue. Talking Topics, Gaynor Ramsey, Virginia LoCastro, Longman Group UK Ltd, 1997, p.39 My childhood. Talking Topics, Gaynor Ramsey, Virginia LoCastro, Longman Group UK Ltd, 1997, p.37 Who’s taking care of the children. North Star Focus on Listening and Speaking (Basic), Laurie Frazier, Robin Mills, Addison Wesley Longman, Inc., 1998, p. 79-85 A Marriage Agreement. North Star Focus on Listening and Speaking (Intermediate), Helen S. Solórzano, Jennifer P. L. Schmidt, Addison Wesley Longman, Inc., 1998, p. 182-191 Punishment. A Radio Report. North Star Focus on Listening and Speaking (Intermediate), Helen S. Solórzano, Jennifer P. L. Schmidt, Addison Wesley Longman, Inc., 1998, Introducing the topic, Listening for main ideas, p. 157-165 The Generation Gap. Focus on Britain Today. Clare Laverly. Phoenix ELT, 1993, p. 47