Cheetah in Charge

Purrfect Mates 6

Cheetah in Charge Cass Cowell struggles with his past, which he desperately wants to keep from his family. Even though they destroyed some of the Hunters, Cass remains empty of feeling and full of night mares. The only remedies for these afflictions are his two mates—if he can let them in. Logan is a vampire thrown into a dilemma when he encounters Cass. He is thrilled to finally meet his mate, but that means he has to end a relationship w ith the man he has been dating for hundreds of years. Merrick Roman is the brother of the man that killed himself. He desperately wants everything to work with his new mate despite the horrible damage that was done to Cass prior to their meeting. Will Cass, Logan, and Merrick be able to overcome their problems and become true mates even with the danger of a new evil? Genre: Alternative (M/M or F/F), Ménage a Trois/Quatre, Shapeshifter Length: 35,710 words

CHEETAH IN CHARGE Purrfect Mates 6

Joyee Flynn

MENAGE AMOUR MANLOVE

Siren Publishing, Inc. www.SirenPublishing.com

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A SIREN PUBLISHING BOOK IMPRINT: Ménage Amour ManLove

CHEETAH IN CHARGE Copyright © 2011 by Joyee Flynn E-book ISBN: 1-61034-754-4 First E-book Publication: August 2011 Cover design by Jinger Heaston All cover art and logo copyright © 2011 by Siren Publishing, Inc. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED: This literary work may not be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, including electronic or photographic reproduction, in whole or in part, without express written permission. All characters and events in this book are fictitious. Any resemblance to actual persons living or dead is strictly coincidental.

PUBLISHER Siren Publishing, Inc. www.SirenPublishing.com

Letter to Readers Dear Readers, If you have purchased this copy of Cheetah in Charge by Joyee Flynn from BookStrand.com or its official distributors, thank you. Also, thank you for not sharing your copy of this book.

Regarding E-book Piracy This book is copyrighted intellectual property. No other individual or group has resale rights, auction rights, membership rights, sharing rights, or any kind of rights to sell or to give away a copy of this book. The author and the publisher work very hard to bring our paying readers high-quality reading entertainment. This is Joyee Flynn’s livelihood. It’s fair and simple. Please respect Ms. Flynn’s right to earn a living from her work. Amanda Hilton, Publisher www.SirenPublishing.com www.BookStrand.com

DEDICATION To everyone who has experienced a loss so tragic you can’t even breathe: Here’s to hoping we make it to the other side and find happiness.

CHEETAH IN CHARGE Purrfect Mates 6 JOYEE FLYNN Copyright © 2011

Chapter 1 “You want another, sweetie?” “Surely curly,” I giggled with a slur as the very nice bartender in a swimsuit asked me. Okay, so it wasn’t really for swimming and she wore a bowtie and ears. Where was I again? “You’re not driving. Are you?” She gave me a hesitant look as she mixed my Jack and Coke. “You staying at the Palms?” “Bellagio,” I answered as she slid the drink across the bar. “I’m hiding from my brothers. It’s the only way I get a moment’s peace. But don’t worry they’ll find me”—I glanced down at my watch—“in about thirty minutes or so. I’ve been away for a whole four hours. This is the longest it’s taken them to find me. But I was smart this time.” “How’s that?” she asked with a smirk and raised eyebrow. Glad I could be amusing to someone today. I eyed her over appreciatively. I did really like her dark chestnut curly hair that she kept long. “Why do I think you’re not giving me a green light to take you home tonight with that look?” “I wish,” I snorted and took a chug of my drink. Then I realized how that sounded as if there was something wrong with her. “I’m gay, but if I was thinking of crossing sides, you’d be pretty enough to

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tempt me.” “A gay man in the Playboy Club?” She bit her lip to keep from laughing. “I see everything in Vegas, but I don’t understand most of it.” She shook her head in mirth and chuckled. “They won’t think to look for me here,” I replied with a wink. I might have been drunk off my ass, but I had a plan still. Never leave home without one, just like car keys. “Hence my being able to drink this much without interruptions.” “They hurting you or something?” She looked so genuinely concerned that I didn’t even laugh at the suggestion. “No, never. It’s just I’m the eldest, and we lost our parents about four months ago, so there’s a lot of drama right now, and I always have to be in charge. I didn’t want to be in charge for one night.” She opened her mouth and then immediately closed it. Smart woman. Another customer called her over, and she patted my hand quickly before disappearing. I was lost in thoughts of the fight we were all in that night freeing the captives from the Hunters’ circus before she took two steps. That was the main reason I was getting drunk after all. I had so much anger and loss and pain bottled inside of me that I went ballistic during the fight. That doesn’t even cover the burning need for revenge and, even worse, vengeance pumping through me all the time. Even before my parents’ death, I’d had so much hurt that I dealt with day to day but kept buried inside. And the only person I could ever blame was myself for what had happened. No other outlet… until tonight. I took it all out on the men I slaughtered, not killed, slaughtered. Were they good people? Fuck no. Did I enjoy clawing them up, making them bleed, hearing their screams of pain and them begging for their lives? I’m not sure enjoyed was the right word. I knew it wasn’t like I crossed into the realm of a psychopath where I wanted to bath in their blood or feel random people’s pain. This was revenge, even if these Hunters weren’t the ones that killed my parents.

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And I enjoyed the feeling that I’d avenged them and made sure that these Hunters didn’t hurt anyone else. But I’d killed people, murdered them, and not felt a damn thing. I didn’t feel guilty or sad or happy or anything. And that’s why I was getting drunk. I was scared that after tonight I was truly dead inside, my heart especially. On the other hand… Could I be when I still felt grief and loss? I shook my head to try and dispel the thoughts. Now was not the time to think or feel. Hell, that was the whole point of ditching my brothers and hiding out here. At least I’d come to a haven for straight guys, because they found me easily other times when I’d gone to gay clubs or bars. I’m sure they were scouring every sex club or hole- inthe-wall trying to make sure I wasn’t having some stranger’s cock shoved up my ass. Part of me knew I should feel bad for making them worry. They had no clue why I ran off and wanted to be numb from the pain yet feel something with a stranger. And god knows they’ve tried for three years to get it out of me. But they can never know. I was strong enough to keep it from them when we shifted. I simply blocked it out, and since they only saw what I was thinking of at the time, they were never the wiser. I did have to admit that my cheetah loved the hunting we’d done and the feeling of taking down the prey. Sometimes I wished I could just stay as a cheetah forever. Everything was so much simpler then. It’s when I shifted back to a human that my life became complicated. All my cat knew was the Hunters were bad and needed to be destroyed. There were no reasons, no knowledge that I should feel guilty, and no complicated thought processes that left me constantly exhausted. I wanted to leave my life behind. And that made me feel guilty. I loved my brothers, but especially now that some of them had found their mates, I wanted to be somewhere else…anywhere else. I was happy for them, but seeing them find their mates and tell me I’d find mine one day was like a knife in the chest every fucking time.

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Because I only had one mate left out there somewhere in the world, and after said mate found out what I did, they’d probably kill me anyways. So alone was better. Alone was actually even safer, but it wasn’t that I feared death… I just didn’t care. Alive, dead, or in a coma, it didn’t matter as long as the pain stopped and I had some peace. All I wanted was just one day of peace and no nightmares. But the damned never got what we wanted, we didn’t deserve it. And since I was one now because of having a hand in Rolf’s death, misery was all I had left. I finished my drink and signaled for another one. As I glanced in the mirror over the bar, taking in my pathetic, defeated reflection, I saw the same red hair with black highlights all my brothers and cheetah shifters had. But the green eyes that sparkled on them were dead. Then my heart skipped a beat. I’d done it again. Thinking of the ghosts of the past had brought them to life. Was I hallucinating? And then as quick as I had seen Rolf, he was gone. But he didn’t look as he did when he had died this time. The vision was older, as if I’d not killed him and he’d aged a few years. Maybe I really needed to be in the rubber room after all. I tried to think of something, anything, else before the memories from that night over three years ago assailed me like they always did. But it never worked. “But this is perfect, Rolf!” I exclaimed with joy. “We’re best friends, and now we’re mates. I mean, you love me right?” “Not like that, Cass,” he said firmly, shaking his head and taking a step back. “I’m not a fag, and you’re just my friend.” I turned my head away as if he’d slapped me. “You really just think I’m some fag? You never said you had a problem with me being gay.” “You can be gay all you want. It doesn’t bother me, but I can’t be. I won’t be, Cass, and you cannot be my mate. My parents would

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disown me or call a hunt on me.” “Then come be with my family,” I whispered and moved toward him. “No one knows yet. Give me the word and I’ll call my parents. Hell, they’ve probably already called to wish me happy twenty-first birthday. They’ll be thrilled that I smelled my mate now that I can.” “I wish you never had.” Rolf gazed at me as his eyes started to overflow with tears. “I can’t be gay, and you’ll die if you don’t claim me. What are we going to do? I don’t want you dead.” “No one’s dying, Rolf,” I said firmly, my blood going ice cold at the idea. Why would he jump to that right away? He eyed me over, his look almost one of pity. Was I being so naive? Shifters waited their whole lives to find their mates. We’d been blessed to already know ours when we turned of age and could then sense them and claim them. “I need to think,” he said as he wiped the tears away with the back of his hand. “Come back around six for dinner, okay? We can talk then and come up with a plan.” “If that’s what you want.” I nodded in defeat, my heart breaking. He didn’t want me. I was thrilled, and Rolf acted as if his life was over. I reached out and touched his cheek gently before spinning on my heel and getting out of there before I begged. He hadn’t said no, so maybe it was just the shock. I avoided my phone and my brothers that day, wandering around campus to think. If Rolf rejected me, I would die, and not just from my broken heart. Hell, if my mate didn’t want me, I’d probably welcome death with open arms. Three hours later, I was knocking at the door of his dorm room. When I got no answer, I turned the knob and found it open. “Rolf?” I said quietly as I entered. I assumed he was taking a nap. How wrong I was. “You’re early,” he whispered as I closed the door behind me. I turned back to him and gasped. “What are you doing?” He was sitting there crying with his

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shoulders slumped as he ran his fingers over the gun on his desk. “Rolf, where did you get that?” “Amazing the things you can get if you know the right people. I’ve had it for a while.” “You’d get kicked out of the dorms if they knew you had that. Fuck, you’d get kicked out of school.” “None of that matters anymore, Cass.” He still wasn’t looking at me, his eyes fixated on the gun. “I didn’t want you to be here for this, so just go, okay?” “I’ll leave if you give me the gun,” I said gently as I took a step forward. “Are you in love with me?” he asked and finally looked at me as he took the gun in his hand. “I know you love me as a friend, but are you in love with me?” I wanted to lie—god did I ever—and say I was. But he was a shifter and could smell the lie. “No, but we’ll fall in love. I have no doubt of that, Rolf. I’ve kept myself closed off to that possibility because you’re straight, and I didn’t want to get my heart broken. But I do love you, and I do want you and not just because we’re mates.” “I love you, Cass. I’ve been madly in love with you since we met and you sat down next to me. I’ve never known anyone like you. Do you know how special you are? How rare it is for a total stranger to approach someone when they’re crying?” “You were so sad that I couldn’t ignore it,” I said gently as I took another step towards him. Maybe if I could get close enough, I could get the gun away while he was distracted. I knew Rolf fought with depression, but never in a million years had I thought it was ever this bad. “You just needed a shoulder, and I didn’t have class then. So I thought, ‘why not help?’ It was the smartest thing I’ve ever done because I love having you in my life.” “Then this will hurt you, and I’m sorry for that,” he replied calmly as the tears dried up. “But my family will call a hunt for me if I’m gay, and that could get you killed as my mate. And if I don’t let

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you claim me, you’ll die. Either option is unacceptable to me.” “We will find another way, Rolf,” I whimpered in panic as I took another step. I needed to stall or this would go badly. Very, very badly. “There has to be another way. Let’s go see my parents, now, tonight. They can help us figure this out.” “You’re lucky that you have such an accepting family, Cass. Never take them for granted, and appreciate them.” He gave me a smile I’d never seen before. Peaceful. “They can be your family, too, Rolf,” I said quickly. His words sounded way too much like good-bye for me, and I was running out of time. “Please, Rolf, don’t give up.” “I’m not giving up I’m just giving you up so you can be free of me. Good-bye, Cass. I will always love you.” “NO!” I shouted as I leapt the last ten feet to him. I wasn’t fast enough. Rolf picked up the gun in a flash, put it to his temple, and pulled the trigger. Shifters can heal from a lot but not that, not a head shot. “Help me! Someone help me!” I screamed as I caught his body before it hit the floor. “Please help us! God no, Rolf, don’t leave me!” I cradled Rolf to me, sobbing as I rocked his lifeless body in my arms. But it was too late. He was gone. I’d been the death of my mate, and I would rot in hell because of it. I came back to the bar with a gasp. Normally the memories happened in my constant nightmares to the point I was afraid to ever sleep. Or other times when I saw a gun. But it was rare that I saw Rolf’s ghost haunting me, and it had never been like what I saw in the mirror. He’d never tormented me this way and showed me what he would have looked like now if he had lived. My heart was racing a mile a minute as I looked around the club and tried to find his ghost. Instead, I saw three very pissed-off men storming towards me. Damn, they’d found me. I turned away from them and ordered another drink after downing the one in my hand. “No more, Cass,” Raz snarled and grabbed my arm. “We’ve been

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looking for you everywhere.” “I’m fine,” I slurred and tried to pull away. “Settle your tab, and let’s go,” Rash said firmly, and he gave the pretty bartender the signal that I wasn’t having anymore drinks. “I’m the oldest,” I replied angrily, falling back onto the stool when I tried to stand up too quickly. “Then act like it,” Ragu said coldly as he grabbed the front of my shirt and pulled me so our noses were touching. “Someday we will learn what happened to you, Cass.” I turned my head and closed my eyes. They’d never found out what happened on our twenty-first birthday, just that I was never their fun, innocent Cass anymore after that. A lot can change in one day. But the accusing looks and anger flowing off of them after seeing Rolf’s ghost was too much. I had already felt like crawling in a hole before seeing Rolf, and now after, I felt so raw that I couldn’t take anymore. “Do you want me to leave? Is that what you want?” Their faces paled, and I ignored them as I signed the credit card slip the bartender was holding for me. I added a fat tip and thanked her. My litter- mates stood there frozen as I stormed out. Well, I would have if my body was working right then. Instead, I was stumbling all over the place and trying to keep upright. “You want to leave?” Rash asked as they caught up to me outside the club. He lifted my arm over his shoulder and helped me walk. “What happened, Cass? Why won’t you tell us? You hide it all so well that the younger litter has no clue that you even went through anything. It was never our place to tell what we were feeling from you when we all shifted, but if you don’t stop this shit, that will change.” “And that’s the way it stays,” I growled and went to one of the waiting cabs. I opened the door but didn’t get in. “And yes, I want to leave. I’m tired of always being responsible for everyone else. I should not be in charge of anyone or have their lives in my hands.” I wanted to say, “So I can’t fail them like I did Rolf.” But then

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they really would pester me to know. “We’re adults, Cass,” Ragu growled and spun me around to face them. “You take charge, and we let you, but we’re more than capable of taking care of ourselves.” “So be it,” I said with a nod and pulled my arm away. “Then I’m going home to pack.” “Cass, no!” Raz gasped as tears filled his eyes. I shook my head and crawled into the cab, closing the door on their faces. “The Bellagio, please,” I said and slumped down in the seat. The driver had heard all of that but wisely didn’t say a word. Good man. I stared out the window at the lights and glamour of Vegas and wished I was alone on a deserted island. At least that way I could choke on my memories and pain without hurting my family. But then again, if they ever found out what had happened with Rolf, they wouldn’t love me anyways and wouldn’t care. Maybe telling them would finally give me the kick in the ass I needed to leave. Or really, they’d kick me to the curb so I’d have to leave. I just didn’t know. The cab pulled up at the Bellagio. I handed him some cash before opening the door and stumbling out. I made it about halfway to the elevators I needed to ride to our rooms when lo and behold there was more family of mine in my face. “Cass, are you drunk?” Sari asked, his jaw just about hitting the ground. “Where have you guys all been tonight?” I glanced over at Cam, the youngest of our litter, and blind, as he looked down at his shoes. Yeah, since he couldn’t see, I was pretty sure he was just hiding his reaction to the conversation. He knew where Ragu, Raz, and Rash had been but hadn’t said anything. What was there to say? They didn’t know anything about my life really, or my pain, just that something had happened. “Yeah, what of it?” I snarled, sounding more cat than man. “I’m going to pack.” “Okay, but we’re here a few more days,” Curtis said slowly. They

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were all standing around one private craps table. And of course, it was all of them. “So there’s no reason to pack.” “I’m leaving,” I replied and went to stumble away. “I’m leaving. I’m packing up my shit from Curtis’, and leaving.” “We weren’t done talking to you,” Raz called out as they raced over to me. Great, just fucking great. “This ends tonight, Cassiel Cowell, or so help me god—” “Or what?” I shouted in his face and shoved him hard. If I’d been sober, he would have gone flying, but instead I almost landed on my ass. “What are you going to do, Raz? Tie me down so I can’t ever leave? I want some fucking peace for once, and I’m leaving.” “Why would you want to leave us?” Shem asked quietly as he moved closer to me. My other brother was blind, too, but since I was yelling like a mad man, it wasn’t hard to figure out where I was. The problem was Shem, more than any of my siblings, pulled at my heart strings. I loved them all, but Shem was so sensitive and helpless at times that I’d do anything for him. “I just have to, Shem,” I whispered and backed away. “I can’t keep doing this anymore. My litter won’t leave me alone, you and your litter have no clue who I really am, and I never get any peace.” “Because you never sleep?” he asked so only I would hear. “Why do you never sleep, Cass?” “You knew?” I gasped. “What else do you know?” I shook my head and took another step away. “It doesn’t matter what you know. I’m leaving.” “Why won’t you tell us, Cass?” Ragu begged and grabbed my arm. “It can’t be as bad as you think it is, brother. Just tell us and let us share your pain and help you.” “You-know-nothing,” I ground out in between clenched teeth. He dropped my arm as if I burned him. They all stood there with their mouths open in shock, so I took the advantage and booked it. The confrontation had been enough for me to sober up some. I got to one of the suites Curtis had reserved and threw my shit

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into my bag. Then I called the airline and booked a flight back to South Dakota. It wouldn’t be like flying in Curtis’ private jet of course, but it would give me time away from everyone. Just as I stepped out into the hallway to leave, the elevator dinged and the doors opened. I smelled some of my brothers before they could step off of it and darted to the stairs. I didn’t look back to see if they were behind me, hoping they would take time to search the rooms. I went out one of the side exits of the hotel and ran to the front where I could catch a cab instead of risking being seen by any more of my family. It worked because five minutes later I was on my way to the airport. I let out a sigh of relief and closed my eyes. Would I see more of Rolf’s ghost if I was alone? Would he ever talk to me? Forgive me? Maybe I could find a witch who was good with spirits. The more I thought about it, the more I liked that plan. If I could talk to Rolf or at least know he could hear me, then maybe, just maybe, there was hope that I wouldn’t spend the rest of my life as this shell of a man. I smiled a real smile for the first time in years at the idea. If I could get Rolf to forgive me for killing him, then maybe god would, too. Or at least I wouldn’t be damned. Or maybe I would still be for all my other sins, like the men I murdered and ripped to shreds that night. Because a person could only be forgiven if they were sorry for their actions, and I wasn’t. But I was sorry Rolf was dead, and it had been all my fault.

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Chapter 2 I slept most of the first plane ride before my connecting flight in Denver to get me back to Rapid City. It sucked that there were no direct flights, but people needing to flee couldn’t really be too picky. I must have finally gotten through to my litter about backing off though because, for once, I didn’t have a gazillion messages or missed calls when I switched planes. Maybe it was childish to have left Vegas at three in the morning, pissy and inebriated, but I just couldn’t take anymore. One more issue, drama, or upset, and I seriously thought I would crack mentally and there would be no coming back. After I got back to Curtis’ place, I didn’t immediately pack the rest of my belongings and leave like I’d planned. No, for the first time in years I wanted to sleep. I was so exhausted from life that I slept without any nightmares. Though I had several living ones when I woke up. I headed downstairs the next morning to grab some breakfast before I headed out. I froze in the dining room when a sweet smell hit my nose. “No,” I whispered as a gorgeous vamp’s head snapped towards me. “Mine,” he growled and jumped up from his chair. I wanted to run, but my body was like lead, frozen in shock. I saw that he had a cast on one leg and one arm as he tried to hobble over to me. “What, baby?” another vamp asked as he stood with the man. “Logan, are you okay?” “Aaron,” Logan said quietly, his eyes filling with tears as he

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glanced from me to him. “That day we’ve always worried about is here.” Aaron turned around so fast that he almost fell back in his chair. I could almost see his heart breaking as his face crumpled in pain. “No!” “Yes.” Logan spoke to him, but his eyes were on me. “He’s my mate.” “No, Logan, no! Please,” Aaron cried out as he grabbed Logan’s arms. I knew their names from Curtis and a note he’d gotten, but had never met either of these men before. “I just got you back from the Hunters, and now you’re leaving me again?” “I’m so sorry, my love,” Logan said as he reached out and pulled Aaron into his arms. “I would have been happy to be your boyfriend for the rest of our days, but we knew our mates were out there. I cannot just ignore him.” “Yes you can, and I think you should,” I called out before turning and racing from the room. This was my punishment for what happened to Rolf. My other mate was in a relationship, and his heart belonged to another. Fate had a sense of humor after all. Sick and twisted humor, but I deserved no less. “Mr. Cowell, there’s a man here to see you,” Curtis’ butler said as I ran, blinded by tears toward the stairs. “What? Who?” I asked, my head swirling as I tried not to growl at the man. It wasn’t his fault that my life was shit. “Who would want to see me and knew I was here?” “I don’t know how he knows, but Mr. Ramon said it was quite urgent.” The older man shrugged and gestured to one of the front rooms of the house. “He’s waiting for you in there and was very insistent that he needed to speak with you.” I went pale at the name, realizing that my life really and truly was over. The butler must have noticed because he moved closer to me as if to catch me before I fainted. I surprised us both by bursting out laughing.

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“I’ll just bet he does,” I gasped before cackling some more. I knew it wasn’t a normal laugh. It sounded even more hysterical than I felt. “Well at least my mate doesn’t have to break up with his boyfriend because the guy wanting to see me will kill me. So it really makes it neat and clean for everyone.” “Mr. Ramon is a threat to you?” the butler asked, his voice shaky as he pulled out his phone. “Oh yeah, but don’t call anyone.” I giggled like a crazy person. “I deserve his wrath several times over. Just let Logan know not to break up with Aaron, and you might want to tell Curtis that they’re here. I’ll be dead, so I can’t relay the message.” “Why wouldn’t I break up with Aaron?” Logan asked as he came down the hallway I’d just been through. “And why the fuck would you be dead?” “I was just informed they were here when we landed,” Curtis said from my left. I spun around to find him, my brothers, and their mates were all standing in the hallway from the side entrance with looks of horror on their faces. “And why would you be dead? What’s Logan or Aaron have to do with that?” “He’s my mate,” Logan answered as he came forward. “And there’s a man in the front room who he says is going to kill him.” “Doesn’t matter,” I said with a smile and a wave of my hand. “Go back to the man you love and be happy. I’m going to go face the music, and it was nice meeting you.” “Cass, you’re scaring me,” Raz whispered as he stepped closer with his hands held out in front of him. He was acting like he was trying not to startle a scared animal. Or crazed I guess would be better in this instance. “Who’s in the front room?” “Merrick Roman,” he said as he stepped out of the doorway and closer to me. Wow, I’d missed that the door had opened. Rolf’s older brother looked as good as I remembered from the pictures Rolf had had in his room. He smelled like Rolf, and it started my waterworks again.

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“Roman?” Ragu replied more to himself than an actual question. I saw the lightbulb go off over his head as he connected the name. “You related to Rolf Roman? Cass’s friend from college?” Then he turned to me and asked the question I hoped never to hear. “What happened to Rolf anyways? You guys used to be great friends, and then one day you just stopped talking about him and that was it.” “Yes, he’s Rolf’s older brother,” I answered and went into hysterical peals of laughter as I dropped to my knees. I was able to catch enough air here and there to get some other answers out. “And what happened to Rolf? I killed him, so Merrick’s here to kill me, I’m sure.” “What?” I heard several people cry out. “And Rolf was my mate,” I said, still laughing as I held my sides and stared at the ceiling. “And Logan’s my other one and in love with Aaron, but since Merrick’s going to end me, there’s no point in them breaking up. And I guess I’m not leaving after all.” I looked over at Merrick then. “That about sum it up? Want to just shoot me now and get it over with, or were you thinking torture? I deserve it and worse after all.” “No one’s killing anyone or being tortured,” Curtis hollered, and the whole foyer erupted with voices. I stared at Merrick until a few of my brothers tackled him when he moved toward me. Logan was trying to come closer, but Aaron was trying to stop him, and Diets was shouting with Curtis in Aaron’s face. A few of my other brothers, including Ham and his mates, were trying to talk to me, but I just kept laughing. I laughed and laughed as tears ran down my cheeks at the irony of it all. It was just too fucking funny! I was so lost in my head that I couldn’t hear what any of them were saying to me. And then I felt something in my arm, but I didn’t really care. I guess they gave me a shot because I did stop laughing right before my world went black.

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**** “Look, I’m trying to tell you that he didn’t kill Rolf,” someone said quietly. It took me a moment to realize that it was Merrick. Great. “Now I know I’m locked up,” I moaned as I opened my eyes and tried to sit up. It didn’t work, so I flopped back to the bed on my side. If I was in a nut house, why bother? “I really wish I thought I was still drunk and just hallucinating again.” “When have you ever hallucinated?” Ham asked as he knelt in front of me and pushed my hair back from my face. He was crying, which broke my heart, but I still couldn’t move, or I would have turned so I couldn’t see it. “Why did you never tell me, Cass?” “My mate is dead because of me,” I answered, my voice cold with anger and shame. “I don’t deserve the help or love you guys might have given me if you didn’t kick me out of the family.” “Is that what you thought we’d do?” His eyes went wide, and then he shook his head. “Merrick says you didn’t kill Rolf, Cass. And even if you did, we would never stop loving you. There has to be more to this story, brother. Please, let us in.” “Just let him kill me and be done with this.” I closed my eyes, not wanting to see his reaction, and partially because I was tired. So fucking tired of all the pain and grief. “I won’t kill my mate,” Merrick growled as he grabbed my arm and rolled me onto my back. “Who’s your—” I started to ask in confusion, and then it hit me. I took another deep breath. He smelled like Rolf did but different, and it was that sweet scent I smelled with Logan. “No, no, this can’t be happening.” I shook my head, closing my eyes tightly as my body started to shake violently. “No, I’m crazy. This is all in my head or a dream. I saw Rolf in Vegas, and he looked like you. This is just in my head again.” “It was me in Vegas, Cassiel. By the time I found you and went to

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make my way toward you, your brothers were there. And this was a discussion I wanted to have in private,” Merrick said gently as he pulled me into his arms. I tried to fight him, push him away, but whatever drug they gave me was good stuff because I could barely feel my limbs. “I’ve been trying to find you for a while now. I knew where you were when Rolf killed himself, but I needed to heal after losing Rolf, and I figured you did, too. “But I’ve known we’re mates since I packed up Rolf’s stuff and smelled your scent in his room. And when I went to find you a few months ago, thinking enough time had passed, you had disappeared.” “I’m crazy. This isn’t real,” I whispered over and over again. Fate could not be this cruel and spiteful. I knew that Rolf was dead because of me, and I said that I killed him, but technically I didn’t. I just felt that I did. “You’re not crazy, and you didn’t kill Rolf,” Merrick cried as he held me tighter and kissed my cheek. “Rolf was sick, Cassiel. He’d been sick for as long as I can remember. If anyone is to blame for his death, it’s my parents. They knew he was mentally ill but did nothing and completely ignored it. He was delusional, and I’m pretty sure schizophrenic.” “No, no, he was just depressed a lot,” I said, shaking my head and still trying to pull away. “He was—” But then something hit me. “What if he wasn’t teasing?” “Who wasn’t teasing, Cass?” Ham asked as he slid onto the other side of the bed and wrapped his arms around me as well. “Rolf used to tell me these outlandish stories,” I whispered and buried my face in Ham’s neck. “I thought he was teasing me, just telling tall tales for fun. I always nodded and smiled, thinking he should get involved with the theater one day, because he was really talented at being another character or whatever.” “No, he wasn’t goofing around,” Merrick said sadly. “He really believed them. He sent me an e-mail before he killed himself saying

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that he wished me well on my adventures at sea and hoped that mom and dad didn’t call the hunt on me once he was gone.” “That’s what he said to me before he shot himself.” I scrunched my eyebrows together in confusion as I pulled away from Ham and looked at Merrick. “He said he couldn’t be gay and that your parents would call the hunt on him and then me for being his mate. And he told me he was in love with me, and since I couldn’t claim him without your parents trying to kill me, and I’d die if I didn’t claim him—” “He’d kill himself so you’d be set free of the bond,” Merrick whispered when I got too choked up to continue. I nodded and hid my face from him. “I didn’t get to the gun in time,” I said quietly. Ham gasped and wrapped his arm tighter around me. “I didn’t know he had a gun. It was my twenty-first birthday, and for cats that marks our age for mating. You can’t smell or sense your mate before then. I saw him that morning at breakfast and, suddenly, he wasn’t just Rolf my best friend for the past year. He was my mate.” “But he wasn’t, Cassiel. I am your mate. Rolf just smelled enough like me to confuse your senses, which happens. Did you start overheating or feel the clawing need?” “No,” I whispered and closed my eyes. Why had I never thought of that? Rolf smelled good to me, but there was never any real pull or desire to jump him as I felt towards Merrick or Logan even with all the drama going on. “If he hadn’t killed himself, you would have figured it out. I just think you didn’t have enough time to understand what you were smelling.” I ripped myself away from them, finally able to control my sleepy- feeling body, and leapt from bed. I spun around to face a very startled Ham and Merrick as I shook with rage at the unfairness of it all. “So he’s dead because of me, and we weren’t even mates? He did it so I wouldn’t die, and I was never going to. That’s just fucking

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perfect.” I fell to me knees and started to laugh again when my chin was jerked up roughly. “Rolf committed suicide because he was ill,” Merrick growled in my face. “If he didn’t do it then, he would have done it later. It wasn’t the first attempt he made.” “How did I not know? He didn’t seem sick or anything.” None of this was making me feel any better, and I was sure once it all sunk in, I’d feel worse. “It came and it went,” Merrick answered with a shrug. “He was never really diagnosed with anything since my parents basically ignored his illness. They thought it was something he’d outgrow and left it at that. Hell, they were so in denial that they shipped me off to my grandparents so I’d stop bringing it up and trying to get Rolf to a doctor. But I was only a year older than him, so I was a kid myself.” “But—” I stopped when Merrick shook his head and went on. “My parents never would have had a problem with Rolf being gay, Cassiel. Rolf had a problem with him being gay. He had a problem with me being gay and told me so when I came out.” “But he said he was in love with me,” I whispered, and spots started to form in front of my eyes. I was pretty sure I was going to pass out again. Oh wait, they drugged me last time. Maybe I still had enough in my system? “Claim me, Cassiel, and we can work through this,” Merrick said gently as he cupped my cheek. “You’re on a timetable, and Logan’s freaking out. Claim us.” “I don’t want to. I don’t want any mates, and I could never get past what happened with Rolf to have anything between us.” “Don’t say that, baby—” he started saying, but I didn’t hear the rest of it, because my eyes rolled up into my head, and I blacked out. **** “Is he an alcoholic or something?” Logan growled, bringing me

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back around. I groaned and opened my eyes, cringing at the sight before me. Logan and Merrick were pulling out dozens of empty bottles of booze from my closet and under the bed. “It’s the only way I ever get any sleep,” I answered with a sigh. Damn I was just so tired of my life. “Otherwise I have nightmares.” I started laughing again. “Or hallucinate.” “No more laughing,” Logan said firmly as he gripped my chin tightly. “And no more drinking. Merrick told me what happened, and you have nothing to feel guilty about.” “I can’t help the way I feel,” I snarled and pulled away from him. “And you’re not the boss of me, so you can just go fuck yourself. Or how about the man you love?” “Aaron left,” he replied, his face full of pain. The instinctual part of me that knew we were mates wanted to comfort him in his time of need. The human, bitter parts of me wanted to smack him and mock him because he seemed to think I should be supportive of his loving another man. I think he saw what I was feeling on my face. “You don’t get to judge, Cass. You’re what? Twenty- four? I’m over a century old, and that’s a long fucking time to be alone.” “Whatever, get out of my room,” I grumbled and rolled back over. “You need to claim us, Cassiel,” Merrick said gently as I felt the bed dip behind me. His warm hand ran over my shoulder, and my cheetah was screaming out for his touch. My cat was never conflicted and didn’t give a shit about my emotional damage. He wanted our mates. “We understand why you can’t just jump into mating us. We’re not upset, but we do ask that you at least claim us.” “Why bother?” I whispered, my eyes starting to burn. But I hadn’t cried over this yet, and I wasn’t about to start, because once the waterworks started, there was no going back. I’d stick with the hysterical laughter, thank you very much. “You’ve been through too much to think clearly right now. If you claim us, at least we’ll have the time for you to figure out what you want and what you feel.” Logan lost the anger in his voice as he tried

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to convince me. “I’m going to need time to get over Aaron and start a life with you guys, too. No one’s saying ‘fuck the past and let’s jump into mating bliss.’ Life doesn’t work like that.” I filled with rage at his words. They were treating me like a petulant, stupid child that was crying over a broken toy. Rolf was dead and whether the circumstances changed didn’t mean I could just change the way I felt. Actually it did but towards Merrick. I rolled over and looked at him with cold, dead eyes. I knew the look because I’d seen it too many times in the mirror, and it scared me. “You want to be upset about the drinking, my rage, and how I’m reacting? Go look in the fucking mirror for who is to blame.” “How is this Merrick’s fault?” Logan asked, his eyes going wide, and I saw a flicker of something as he stared at me. Fear. Good, let them be scared of me, because maybe they’d leave me alone then. “If he had told me all of this back when Rolf died, I wouldn’t have spent the past three years in hell. I would have grieved, but moved on. I wouldn’t be this empty, bitter, raged- filled waste of space that I am now. I had no one to talk to about any of it. It’s been festering. I can’t sleep. I hallucinate seeing Rolf still. The guilt just eats at me. I run from my family so strangers can fuck me like a cheap whore just—” “What?” they both yelled together. Oh here we go! This was the key to getting them to leave. “You know nothing about me.” I snickered at the outrage on their faces over some casual sex. “Still want me now that I told you that? You want details as to how big of a slut I am? What I’ve let faceless men do to me just to try and feel something more than grief? I lost my virginity in a gang bang where five, count them, five men fucked me unconscious. So let’s have some sex, shall we?” “God you’re a prick,” Logan said firmly as he shook his head in abhorrence. I didn’t care what he felt about me. Hell, I felt enough disgust for myself for the both of us and Merrick. “Curtis and everyone say you’re one of the most kind-hearted, loving, and loyal people they’ve ever known. I think you’ve been lying to all of them

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and hiding it.” He hit the nail on the head pretty damn well, but I wasn’t about to give him the satisfaction of knowing it hurt. “Yup, so don’t let the door hit you in the ass on the way out.” “I know the man my brother used to write me about, and it’s not the man lying before us, Cassiel.” “Stop fucking calling me that,” I growled as more pain filled my chest. Only my parents ever called me that. “My name is Cass. And you’re right. That man is gone, dead. He died when Rolf pulled the trigger.” “Well, I’m not leaving until you claim me,” he said firmly and stood. “Fine but I will never, ever love you,” I replied harshly, swallowing my lust and desire as he pulled off his shirt. He froze with his hands on the waistband of his jeans. “I can work with that,” Merrick said with a shrug. “I’m willing to take that chance and not give up. What are you willing to do? Or are you just going to give up, roll over, and let yourself die? Look what his death did to us. Are you willing to do that to your family?” We stared at each other for a few long moments, Logan holding his breath. I snarled, backing down as I knelt up on the bed and started ripping my clothes off. “Get yourselves ready because I don’t have the control to not claw you,” I growled as I felt the change pushing at me. My cheetah couldn’t seem to decide if he wanted to fuck them or kill them for the pain they were causing me. “Thank you,” Merrick whispered as he leaned in close to me. I pulled back away from him so fast I fell on my ass. I yanked off my jeans and wouldn’t look at him. “No kissing. I don’t know either of you, and that’s too intimate.” “So we can fuck you and be fucked by you, but kissing’s too intimate?” Logan had so much scorn and venom in his voice that I felt the heat from his words. I nodded and glanced up at them now that I

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was naked. “You really just are a whore.” “Absolutely, except I don’t even take money,” I sneered at him as Merrick’s eyes filled with tears. “I’ve had it offered for my tight ass and talented blow jobs, but I wanted to do it. So you can either take this whore and claim me, or you can walk out that door and let me die. Just decide so I don’t have to fuck Merrick if there’s no point.” “Do you even have a soul?” Logan asked and pulled off his shirt. I didn’t think he really wanted me to answer, and I wasn’t sure I didn’t have a soul. Hell, I could have lost mine a while ago. Who knew? He got naked quickly, and then I watched as the two of them got each other ready for me. They did kiss, and I found myself jealous at the way they looked at each other. I felt like I was intruding on their mating instead of being a part of it. I really had no one to blame but myself after all. It still hurt. If I’d been stronger and not been dealt several blows the past couple of days, I would have been honest with them. I would have confessed I’d never been kissed. I’d have said that I’d never wanted any of those strangers to be gentle with me, and I was saving my first kiss on the distant hope that someday I would find my mate and be happy. It was too late now. I’d put up the front that I was a complete bastard even though I was crying on the inside. Let them think this was who I was. It was better this way. If I didn’t let them in, they couldn’t hurt me later when they left because I was broken inside. Or at least that’s what I kept telling myself.

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Chapter 3 “You ready for this?” I asked, some of my bravado leaving as I eyed over Merrick’s naked, perfect body as he presented himself to me. He was on his knees with his shoulders on the bed, looking at me over his shoulder. I still couldn’t look at him in the eyes, but I wanted to. I wanted to get lost in them and have real mating sex. But I knew that part of me was gone, burned away with rage and grief. “Claim me, my mate,” he whispered as he nodded. I didn’t ask again and let the change flow over me. I massaged the cheeks of his ass, careful of the claws. Then I grabbed my cock and started rubbing it over his slicked up pink star. I was lost in amazement at the noises he was making and how his hole was twitching as if begging for me to enter him. “Go ahead, self-proclaimed whore,” Logan hissed in my ear. I’d been so distracted I didn’t even notice he’d moved onto the bed with us. “You’re supposedly so experienced. Show us what you got.” “You’re not helping, Logan,” Merrick growled fiercely. But the damage was already done. Logan was either just trying to taunt me or he’d busted me. I’d never taken anyone before. I’d always given myself during sex. I had been angry, horny, and then filled with desire when looking at Merrick. Now, I was filled with shame and cold inside. I started to pull away as my cock wilted and shifted back. “Cass?” Merrick asked hesitantly as I started to scramble off the bed. I didn’t want them to see me as weak, and when all else fails, I dip into that cesspool of rage I have at the core of my being. “Fuck you both,” I snarled and grabbed my clothes as I stood with my feet on the floor. “This will never work, and I’m not going down

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this road knowing it leads to the edge of a cliff.” “You asshole,” Merrick shot at Logan before leaping out of bed and wrapping his arms around me from behind. “Please, Cass? You don’t know where this will lead. Give us the time to figure it out. I promise that if you still don’t want us we’ll leave you alone for good.” “How long do I have to give you?” I asked hesitantly, my insides churning as his hands rubbed my naked stomach. Hell, the skin was getting goose bumps and twitching from the attention. I wanted to purr and stretch so he had better access to all of me. “Six months. Give us six months of being mated and trying to make this work. If it doesn’t, we’ll leave and let you get back to your life.” “I doubt six months will wipe everything else away,” I said with a snort. “Logan doesn’t want to be here anymore than I do, and I’m not even pissed with him. It’s you I practically hate, Merrick.” “If I had known what you thought about Rolf’s death, I would never have left you alone to deal with it, baby. I swear that to you. I was grieving, too, and probably not thinking clearly, but I never dreamed you didn’t know he was sick and blamed yourself. I’m so sorry. So fucking sorry, Cass.” When he put it like that, I could see his point. Rolf was his brother after all. He had his own shit to deal with. A lot of the anger towards him left, but that didn’t mean I wasn’t still apprehensive about being with him or moving forward. And Logan seemed to be as big of an asshole as I was. “I’m sorry, too,” Logan said softly as he knelt in front of me. He ran his hands up my naked thighs, and I shivered at the intimate contact. “I yell at you for judging me when you didn’t even say anything, and here I am being a judgmental douche. I don’t think you’re a whore. I think you were lost and hurting. I do think you’ve been lying to or keeping parts of the truth from us so you look like a selfish jerk and we won’t want you.”

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I went to say no, deny it with everything in me, but the pained look in his eyes had me snapping my mouth closed. I was a mess. I knew that. But they were my mates, and if nothing else, they deserved better than my lies. Logan rubbed his face against my thigh in a tender, cat- like gesture that my cheetah responded to. I purred as my cock got hard again while Merrick rubbed my stomach and chest while placing soft kisses along my neck and shoulders. “Stop, I’m going to come,” I gasped as Logan’s fingers ran over my cock. They both froze. “After all your experience you told us about, you’re going to blow already?” Merrick asked gently, absolutely no judgment in his voice. I started to pull away, but they both held me tightly and kept me immobile. “Tell us the truth, Cass. Give us at least that, please.” It was the please that did me in, and I stopped struggling. I took a deep breath and nodded. “What do you want to know?” “Did you really lose your virginity that way?” Logan asked before licking the head of my leaking cock. Were they just going to torture me with pleasure to get what they wanted? “Yes, but I didn’t know it was going to happen, and it was the first time I ever drank. It happened the day after Rolf died, and I was drowning myself in a bar. Some nice guy offered to make me smile, and I wanted to not feel the pain anymore,” I admitted, my voice getting breathy at their continued attention. “What happened?” Merrick rubbed his fingers over my nipples, and I couldn’t bite back the groan in time. “He took me to his frat house, and the next thing I knew I was on my knees naked, blowing him. Then they all took turns fucking me, and I woke up the next morning on the floor alone. I got out of there and never saw any of them again.” “Has anyone given you head before?” Logan asked and then went back to licking me. “No,” I whispered and closed my eyes. “I’ve never even been

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kissed before.” They both froze again, but I went on before I lost my nerve. “I’ve always been the one who got fucked. I’ve never been inside someone or even just made out with anyone.” “Jesus,” Merrick hissed, his voice showing way too much pain from my words. I started to pull away again when they didn’t move or say anything else, but Merrick held me to him while Logan wrapped one big hand around each of my thighs. “Why would you let random men fuck you but not let anyone love on you?” “I didn’t deserve any love, and if it was just sex, then I wouldn’t hurt someone else, because I was too dead inside to care about them. I just wanted to not feel for a while.” I opened my eyes back up because I started to feel silly just standing there naked with my eyes closed like I could block out what was going on. “Did it ever help?” Logan asked, staring up at me with no accusation in his eyes. “I stopped thinking about the pain in my life while it was happening,” I answered with a half shrug. “But no, it never helped really, and I always felt emptier inside when it was over. That’s why I started drinking at night, so I wouldn’t go out, and I could get some sleep without nightmares.” “And you never told a soul any of this before Merrick showed up here?” “No, though my litter- mates knew something was going on. Raz found me at a gay leather club when things got really bad in my head. I don’t even really remember it, but after that night, I decided drinking in hiding was better than the dangerous road I was on.” “What do you mean?” Merrick asked as he laid his head on my shoulder. “I kept thinking maybe I just needed more sex or a different kind of sex to make me feel, so I—” I snapped my mouth shut when I started to sense the wail of pain building up. If I said anymore, I was going to cry. “It wasn’t just a leather club was it?” I shook my head and saw the

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sadness in Logan’s eyes at my answer to his question. “It was one of those Dom clubs and you were being the sub.” He made it a statement, but I still nodded anyways. “So Raz found you somehow and witnessed what?” “I was strapped to a table and being whipped while they fucked me,” I whispered so quietly I barely heard myself. I heard Merrick swallow loudly. “Did it work?” “No. All I felt was self- loathing and that didn’t help the pain I had eating me.” “So then you stopped?” Logan asked. “Yeah, I stopped pushing those limits and started drinking. I’ve had a few hookups since, when I can run from my family for a while. It used to just be a night cap or two and I’d sleep. But since my parents died, if I’m not taking care of my brothers, I’ve pretty much just been lost in a bottle.” “How long have you lived with Curtis here, Cass?” “Not long.” “Well, it couldn’t have been more than three months, because I was living here until Mel and the Hunters grabbed me. So you’re saying all these bottles we found are yours from just the time you’ve been living here.” “Yeah, I gotta pay back Curtis’ liquor stash,” I said, starting to laugh in that hysterical way again. “Do you know how hard it is to run an errand alone when you have nine brothers, four of which are in my litter? It’s exhausting to try to even get a minute to myself.” “We’ll go out in a few days and get everything you need, but no more drinking, Cass,” Logan said firmly. “I can’t promise that,” I replied with a sigh. “It’s the only thing I know that will keep the nightmares away and control my rage. Otherwise I shift, and I’m not too careful about what I hunt.” “Wh–What do you mean?” Merrick stuttered and started to shake. “What have you hunted, Cass?” “I know besides the Hunters in Vegas last night there’s never been

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a human,” I said, and I swear I heard them both exhale the breaths they were holding. “But I’ve been letting my cheetah completely take over and run on instinct, so I don’t think. I know there’s been a couple of cows, several deer, some sheep, and I’m pretty sure there might have been a dog.” “You killed a puppy?” “It wasn’t a puppy, and I’m not sure if it was a dog or a wolf, so it’s not like it was a nice doggy,” I grumbled. Even I had my limits and would never hurt a puppy. “But it jumped on my back when I was going after one of the sheep, and when I clawed it, I didn’t hear normal wolf sounds, so I freaked and ran.” “That’s not the same as hunting down a dog, Cass,” Logan said, rolling his eyes up at me. “You feel guilt way too easily, babe.” He held up a hand to silence me as he went on. “I get you’re all messed up, and what happened was a major brain fuck. I understand that, and it takes time to heal. But I see a recurring theme of taking the blame for other people’s actions.” Like you did with Rolf hung in the air as if he’d said it. I got his point, and I couldn’t even deny it. So I just shrugged my shoulders and hung my head in shame. “Hey, don’t shut down like that,” he whispered and lifted my chin as he stood. “I wasn’t criticizing. We all do it to an extent. I just wanted you to know Merrick and I don’t see you as the one to blame for half the shit you do. Now on to better topics because I think we’ve exhausted our serious talking quota for the day.” “I wholeheartedly agree,” Merrick purred in my ear. “But I do have one thing to say first.” “What?” I asked hesitantly, not sure I would like this. “Can you try not to drink so much and promise you won’t hide it?” “I can do that,” I said honestly after I thought for a moment. “Could we come with you when you felt the need to hunt and run?” Logan asked gently as he cupped my cheek and rubbed his

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thumb over my skin. “I can keep up.” “And I can shift into anything, so I can hunt with you,” Merrick said as he rubbed his cheek against my other one. “I take on the personality of whatever animal I change into. If I shift into a lion, I become more dominant, but if it’s a squirrel, then not so much.” “Wait, you’re a straight shape-shifter?” Logan replied with a gasp, his eyes going wide. “You didn’t know that?” I asked, completely shocked they’d not discussed this when I’d been unconscious. “He smelled of shifter but not really a specific type,” Logan answered with his eyebrows drawn together. “You smell of shifter and big cat, which I now know to be cheetah, but since I’d never been around one, I didn’t know which. I’ve met a lion, and it’s different. But yeah, Merrick smells just of shifter, and I assumed I just didn’t recognize the animal.” “No animal, I’m straight shifter.” He chuckled. “I can shift into anything I’ve seen. Though birds are hard because of the whole flying thing, and I’m not a fan of heights, so I’ve only tried it once.” He shivered behind me. “And once was enough.” “Could you shift into a vamp or other people?” “Other people, no,” he said and then went quiet in thought. “I might be able to shift my mouth and have fangs, but I’m not sure. You guys are too human, I think, and most straight shifters change into some type of animal.” “I don’t have any experience with any shifters more than just in passing.” Logan snickered and shook his head as he dropped his hand to his side. “I might need a rule book for you guys.” “Can I ask something?” I waited until I saw Logan nod and felt Merrick do the same. “Weren’t you in a couple of casts earlier today?” “Yeah, they were coming off today, so they let me leave Conley’s yesterday. The doc here cut them off when you were out. I wasn’t with the Hunter’s long, and I kept fighting, so I didn’t go through the

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hell most of them did, like Ham’s mate Luca. It’s not like they could show me in the circus. They just took me as leverage over Aaron since Harold had hated him and so did Mel. I wouldn’t ever help—” “Let’s finish this later,” Merrick said gently, and he ran his hands lower on my body. “No more serious stuff, right?” “Right,” Logan answered with a nod as he watched Merrick’s hands. “Are you going to let us love on you, Cass? Really love on you and show you how it can be between mates?” “No,” I whispered and pulled away. They let me this time. “I–I can’t, I’m sorry. It’ll hurt too much when you leave if I let you in like that.” “Who says we’re ever going to leave, babe?” Logan asked as he reached for me. He let his arm drop when I took another step away. “Everyone leaves me,” I said with a sniffle, looking anywhere but at them. “Rolf, my parents, and now my brothers are all finding mates and moving on.” “They’re not leaving you though, Cass.” Merrick’s words made sense but not to my heart, so I just shrugged. “Are you going to be there for them any less now that you’ve found us?” “Of course not,” I snapped. They both held their arms out to the sides as if saying, ‘well there you go.’ I stared at them for a few minutes, my brain racing through thoughts so quickly it was hard to just pick out a few. Finally I nodded and conceded to their point. “Okay, but slowly, and I’m still not sure about the kissing until I know this is going to work between us.” “Most people start with kissing, babe.” “Take it or leave it,” I said firmly but not with any real anger. I had to do something to protect my heart. “We’ll take it,” Merrick replied quickly and elbowed Logan when he opened his mouth. “We can understand how you need to keep some distance until you’re more comfortable with all of this.” “Yeah, okay, I can live with that,” Logan said with a nod and a sad smile. “But for the record, I want to kiss you. I’d liked to spend

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the whole night doing nothing but kissing you and Merrick and learning your sweet lips.” I blushed at the idea. No one had ever shown me that kind of tenderness before. “And that time will come, but you’ve got some claiming to do.” I watched Merrick as he leaned over the bed seductively and presented his ass to me. “I think we were about here, right?” “Yes,” I hissed and practically pounced on him. I pulled back the cheeks of his ass as I shifted, ready for the pleasure instead of the hurt serious talking could bring. Lining up my cock, I pushed over half of myself inside of him. I wasn’t a small guy when in human form, but in my half-and-half form I was even bigger, so I had a good nine inches to give my mate. “Claim me, Cass. Make me yours,” Merrick cried out. I felt a thrill go through my body at the idea. Mine. Someone that was all mine. Well, mine and Logan’s, but the sentiment was the same. I thrust hard, my control gone, and bottomed out inside of him. “So hot,” Logan moaned. I glanced at him and realized he had moved. He was now sitting on the green, plush comforter with his legs spread wide as he stroked his cock. I was wondering why he wasn’t joining in when he answered my question before I’d even asked it. “I like to watch. I really like to watch before I get in the mix.” “Voyeur.” Merrick snickered. “If you can talk, then I’m not doing my job right,” I said as I pulled out of him slowly. I thrust back into him so hard I knew he’d have a bruise on his ass tomorrow. But he didn’t seem to care, because he went wild under me. “Oh yeah, Cass. Pound into his sweet ass,” Logan groaned. Him watching while pleasing himself moved up the erotic nature of our joining to another level. My hips started snapping harder than I ever thought possible. I was grunting, Merrick was grunting and then some, and I swear Logan was whimpering. If there was no other

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pleasure or stimulus, I was ready to blow just from the sounds Merrick was making under me. “Gonna come,” I panted as I leaned over Merrick’s back. “Want me to fill you up with my cum?” “Fuck yes,” he hissed and tilted his head to the side. I couldn’t have held back if I wanted to. Seeing his sleek neck stretched out for me, with its corded muscles straining and his jaw ticking as I plowed into him, undid me. I licked once over the soft skin where his neck met his shoulder and sank my canines into him. “Oh, sweet mercy!” I grunted as he came, his ass clamping down on me. I drank him down, feeling our mating bond snap into place before lifting my head and roaring out my release. I pumped my seed deep into my mate as my hands convulsed on his hips from the intensity of my orgasm. His tight hold massaged my dick perfectly, milking everything I had to give him. He collapsed onto the bed, and I didn’t have any strength left to keep myself up, landing on top of him. Merrick groaned and squirmed as I gently licked my bite to close the wound. “Fuck,” Logan gasped, and we both turned our heads to watch as he came, pumping his cock faster than any human could ever move their hand. He shot all over his chest and even hit his chin. “I think he really likes to watch.” Merrick chuckled, and I felt the vibrations throughout my body. “Oh god, don’t do that,” I moaned as his muscles tightened around me. My whole body spasmed at the attention to my sensitive dick. Logan crawled over when he was spent and kissed Merrick gently. “Was it as good as it looked?” he asked as he gasped for breath. “Probably better,” Merrick moaned as I rolled off of him. I felt pride that I’d sent my mate into such bliss, and it turned me on to see him lying there completely spent and debauched. I turned to Logan with a feral grin on my lips. “Your turn,” I purred as I crawled over to him. “Give me a minute,” Logan panted, but I wasn’t having any of it.

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He lay flat on his stomach, and I climbed behind him, straddling his thighs as I rubbed my claws gently over his ass. “Or not.” “I vote for not.” I pulled one cheek of his ass to the side and rubbed my now painfully hard cock against his hole. He’d been stretched out earlier before we started talking, but I didn’t worry about him not being slick enough since my dick was covered in my own cum from being inside Merrick. Logan went to push himself up, and I firmly kept him in place as I pressed the head of my dick past his tight ring. “Shit,” he hissed in pleasure as he tried to push back and take more of me into him. “I’ve never done it at this angle.” “Makes you so nice and tight,” I purred as I slid in farther, working my cock into him as slowly as I could without dying of need. “I might end up becoming a voyeur, too,” Merrick whispered as he watched where our bodies joined. “I can see how it’s appealing.” “See, and I just felt left out when you guys were kissing and stretching each other.” I froze and felt Logan go stiff under me at the confession. I panicked and thrust hard into him to distract them from what I said. I so didn’t want to talk about that right now. “I don’t like to bottom, but I think I change my mind on that,” Logan whimpered as I held still and gave him time to adjust to the penetration. “Or maybe it’s who I was doing it with.” “Do not bring up Aaron when I’m inside of you,” I snarled and slapped his ass hard probably harder than I meant to. But talk about bad form! “I didn’t mean it like that, Cass,” he said gently as he glanced at me over his shoulder. “I was trying to say that I think you’re the right person, and that makes everything so much more enjoyable. I mean, like, I’m not stuck in the past, and I know who I’m with and want to be here.” I didn’t know what to say to that. I’d need time to think about it, but I understood what he meant. He wanted me to know he wasn’t wishing I was Aaron or picturing his ex-boyfriend when we were in

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bed. I appreciated the sentiment, but since it hadn’t even crossed my mind, it sort of opened a new can of worms for me to worry about. I gave him a sharp nod and started thrusting. There was no more talking then. The only sounds were our bodies smacking together and the intense moans and screams from his mouth. I liked that I could make him scream. Merrick watched us intently, his eyes dreamy as he drank in the sight. At least I lasted longer the second time. “Coming, coming,” Logan cried out suddenly, and I quickly struck. He screamed loud enough to rattle the windows as I sank in my teeth and took us both to heaven. I yelled out my intense climax seconds later and filled him with my seed. “Oh yeah, I could totally be a voyeur with you two.” Merrick snickered after we’d come back down from our bliss, and I crumpled against Logan’s back. “Could I talk you guys into toys as easily, too?” Logan asked as our hearts started to slow to normal a few minutes later. “What did you have in mind?” I replied and licked my bite. I glanced up at Merrick and the three of us broke out into peals of laughter. I mean real laughter, not the hysterical or fake kind I’d done for the past few years. And damn if I didn’t feel my heart start to heal.

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Chapter 4 I woke up with my face in the crook of someone’s neck with one arm and one leg thrown over him. Added to that there was a warm, firm body spooned against my back. Oh, I could get used to waking up like this! They were both definitely taller than my five-nine since everything wasn’t lining up on our bodies, but they were hard and smelled delicious. I opened my eyes and leaned up so I could get a good look at what I was feeling and froze. “No,” I gasped and shoved at any flesh I could find so I could get out of this nightmare. Rolf was here, and I’d woken up naked with him. How could that be? “Cass?” one of them said, and I screamed. I got far enough away so we weren’t touching, and then I ended up going ass over head when I fell off the edge of the bed. “Cass! Baby, what’s wrong?” I didn’t look back to see which of them spoke or what was going on. I was too busy dealing with the worst fear and panic of my life. I needed out of here! I got to my feet and started to shift. No, no, no! I couldn’t open the door if I was in cheetah form. “Cass, it’s okay.” Were they kidding? What was okay with waking up in bed with a dead man? I grabbed the knob and turned as my hands sprouted claws. I was in fear for my life, and instinct took over even though the only real threat was in my hand. Pushing the door open, I was able to make it seconds before I was in full cheetah form. I snarled into the doorway back at the nightmare before hitting the door with my hind quarters so it slammed shut. What now? I ran,

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trying to think of what to do. And then it hit me. Shem. I wanted Shem. He was the most gentle of all of us, and he’d just leave things alone without pestering questions that didn’t help when trying to calm down. I found his room and barreled through the door without even slowing down. “What the fuck?” Curtis shouted as I leapt onto the bed and whimpered. “Cass? What’s wrong, Cass?” Shem asked as he moved lightning quick and wrapped his arms around my neck. No matter how many times he did it, it always amazed me that he knew which of us it was in cheetah form. I could tell by sight, but Shem was blind and somehow just knew either by sound or I didn’t know how. But it was amazing. I cried out like a wounded animal as I dropped to the bed and shifted back. I moved into his lap screaming and crying. It took me several tries to even get any words out but finally I managed. “Rolf in my bed. Woke up to a corpse.” “Cass, it wasn’t Rolf. It was Merrick,” he whispered softly as he rubbed his cheek against mine in comfort. Oh fuck! How fucked in the head was I? “It’s okay, Cass. It’s new, and I’m sure I’d have thought the same thing.” “Cass!” Logan hollered as they came racing into the room. “What happened?” I couldn’t even look at them I was so embarrassed, and the fear hadn’t just disappeared instantly from realizing it was Merrick. And now that the flood gates had broken, I couldn’t just stop them. I cried and screamed in agony letting everything out that I’d kept bottled in since the night Rolf shot himself. “He thought he woke up in bed with Rolf,” Curtis said quietly to my mates, and I barely registered his words. “Oh shit,” Merrick hissed. “What can we do?” “Give us some space,” Shem answered as he ran his hands over

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my back. “Curtis, could you get everyone from his litter? I think they need to finally see what he’s been holding in all this time.” “Okay, my angel,” he said, and then I heard him leave. “So he thought it was Rolf? Now he knows it wasn’t. Get over it,” Diets grumbled. “Get the fuck out!” Shem shouted with such venom in his voice that it even startled me into pausing in my meltdown. “What?” Diets yelled. “What did I do?” “Get out of here, Diets, or so help me god—” “Fine! You want to forgive him after he lied and kept things from you this whole time, you go right ahead. But I’m not holding his hand after what he did.” I felt the bed move as he got up. I wanted to say he was right and leave, but I couldn’t seem to get my body to work. Shem, on the other hand, snarled at his mate. “I’m sorry, so sorry,” I said in between gasping for air. Then I went back to wailing like a lunatic. “I know you are, big brother,” he whispered against my ear and held me tighter. “It’s okay. We’re fine, we’re all fine.” I nodded as he held me until other arms lifted me off the bed. I knew it was Rash by his scent. My other three litter-mates were already lying on the floor in cheetah form, and Rash set me down by them. I shifted as he did, and they all nuzzled me and licked my face in comfort. That was my undoing, that kindness after everything I’d kept from them. So I showed them everything. Each litter has a hive mind when in animal form, so all I had to do was think about what happened from the beginning, and they saw it as if they’d been there. As I flipped through memories, I heard several snarls and whimpers at my pain, but they never stopped comforting me. It took me about two hours to go through the highlights and the worst parts of what had happened to me and how I’d handled it. I was still too distraught and coming down from my fear over what I

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thought had been a life- like nightmare to worry about what they were seeing. If I’d been in my right mind, I would have been mortified. “Can I tell the other litter?” Rash asked tenderly after we all shifted back. I glanced up at him, and he flinched at the pained look I knew was on my face. “You don’t hate me?” “Never, Cass. We could never hate you, big bro. We love you so much,” he whispered and kissed my forehead. I felt his tears run down my face. “I just wish we’d have known. We could have helped you, but it’s too late to worry about the past. You have to promise me that you’ll never, ever, keep something like this from us again.” “I promise,” I replied as I started to cry again and hiccup. “I’m so sorry. I just didn’t know how to tell you guys. I mean, how do you say, ‘my mate shot himself so he didn’t have to be with me?’” My face fell in calm defeat as I realized I’d have to deal with the inevitable. “But you can tell the younger litter.” “Okay, bro. We’re just going to lay here for a while first while you calm down.” That started another hysterical laugh building in my throat that I just couldn’t swallow. “How? How am I ever going to calm down or explain this to Merrick? They’re going to throw me in a fucking padded room, Rash!” “You listen to me, Cassiel,” Rash growled and grabbed my face roughly between his hands, making sure I was staring into his eyes. “They won’t do that, and even if they tried it, we would never let that happen. You are not crazy. You’ve been traumatized! I think you might want to talk to someone if it doesn’t get better now that you’ve shared what happened, but that’s it. You’re suffering from posttraumatic stress, and losing our parents didn’t help.” “The fact that you’ve been able to hide it this long tells us exactly how not crazy you are, Cass,” Cam added gently as he laid a hand over Rash’s. My brother got the idea and stopped shaking as he held onto my face. “But the drinking has to stop. I know we heal, and there

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shouldn’t be any damage to your liver. It’s just not healthy for you emotionally to do this to yourself.” “I promised Merrick and Logan that I’d try to cut back and at least not drink alone anymore,” I replied with a sigh. “It’s not like I go through the day wishing I had a drink. I’m not an addict. I know that, and I’m not just saying that to downplay the amount of booze I’ve consumed. It’s more when I’m so exhausted and scared to sleep, I pull out a bottle so I can pass out. Does that make sense?” “Why didn’t you just try to take something to sleep?” Raz asked as he ran his hands down my back with the others. “Wouldn’t that have been easier?” “I did try, I swear I did.” I glanced at him with pleading eyes to believe me. “I tried every goddamn over-the-counter drug and herbal remedy. They’d get me to sleep, but the nightmares were worse then—more twisted. And then I couldn’t wake myself from them like I normally can. The alcohol let me sleep without dreaming.” “Okay, Cass, we believe you,” Cam said and kissed my hair before ruffling it. “But now we know, and we’re going to take good care of you. Will you trust us to do that?” “Yes, of course,” I replied and snuggled into their arms. “Do you think Merrick hates me? I can’t think me flipping out was easy for him either.” “He wasn’t mad when I saw him. More scared shitless. Logan, too, bro. It’s going to take some time for you all to get used to each other, and every mating has problems, but you’ll get through it.” Rash paused, and I could almost hear words with the look they all gave each other over my head. “I think, for the time being, you shouldn’t sleep in bed with them. This could happen again, and it would make you take several steps back in the healing process.” I thought about that for a few moments. It made sense, and I never, ever, wanted to experience fear like I did while waking up earlier again. “Okay, what’s the plan?”

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“When it’s time for you to crash for the night, you’re going to shift and we’re going to start sleeping in a puppy pile,” Cam answered. “We’ll shift back obviously after we’ve been asleep a little while and you relax, but it will also help us know when you’re having a nightmare and to wake you up. It can also show us exactly what your nightmares entail. Maybe then we can help dissect them and figure out how to move forward.” “Thank you,” I said as the tears started to dry in my eyes. I glanced at each one of them in turn. “I don’t deserve you guys, but I won’t say no to the help. Thank you so much.” “You do deserve us, and we love you. We don’t want you in pain anymore,” Raz whispered and kissed my cheek. “Okay, enough with the serious. We’ve all got a lot to think about and need to clear our heads a bit. The sun isn’t even up yet, so I say we go for a run, maybe hunt some rabbits, and then have some breakfast.” “Best plan I’ve heard in a while,” I replied with a sigh. I loved letting my cheetah run. And right now he needed it just as badly as I did. “Guys, no hunting around me,” Cam said so quietly and desperately it broke my heart. “I’m sorry. Do you not want me to go?” “Of course we do,” I answered immediately. “We can chase bunnies, but no eating. It’s more fun to chase anyways. We’ll play tag with the fur balls.” “And we’re just always it.” Raz snickered. “Thanks guys,” Cam said as his face heated up with embarrassment. I felt bad for the baby of our litter. Not only did he get stuck being blind, but something was wrong with him that no doctor could ever figure out. The smell of blood made him faint. Hell, if he even saw blood, he puked all over the place and then passed out. He was mortified about it. I mean, he was a cheetah shifter, a predator, and blood affected him like that. Poor guy. We all got up, stretching after lying around and being tangled up on the floor for so long. Then Ragu slipped out into the hallway, and I

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heard his lowered voice explain everything. It took me a minute to realize it was Logan, Merrick, Curtis, and Shem he was talking to. I started to shake with anxiety and embarrassment. “Hey, none of that,” Raz said tenderly as he threw his arm over my shoulder. “Let’s shift and go, okay? Ragu can catch up.” “Thank you for understanding,” I whispered and turned so I could hug him. He returned the embrace until I moved away, letting me take as much strength from him as I needed. It was one of the things I loved most about my brothers…they were always willing to give as much as they could. They never skimped on affection or gave those half-assed guy hugs were you just slapped each other on the back. Hugs from my brothers were always filled with love. We shifted then and moved through the shattered door. I cringed inside as I looked over the remains. Hell, I had even trashed the doorway somehow. Well, add it to the list of things I owed Curtis. Replace liquor stock, check. New door and frame for his bedroom, check. Damn. I’d be lucky if he didn’t kick my ass or throw me out. “Which one is Cass?” Logan asked as we went past them, his voiced strained with concern. I wanted to look at my mates, but I just couldn’t bring myself to do it. “Give him a little space, Logan,” Ragu whispered. I couldn’t take it, the pain in their voices as they talked about me. I pulled in front of everyone and took off. “And that would be Cass.” I didn’t stop, running full speed down the stairs and rounding the corner to get to the back door. Curtis had thought ahead when we moved in and installed a different lock on the one back door for us. He didn’t want Shem walking through the house naked just so he could turn a knob to get outside when he needed to run. So the door had a depressor on the floor for the deadbolt. I pushed it with my paw, the door unlocked, and it swung open. I heard Ragu catching up with us as we filed out the door. “Mm, kitties,” a vamp purred that was on guard duty. I snarled at him loudly, showing my impressive set of teeth. I was big for a

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cheetah, the largest of all my siblings at one hundred fifty pounds. That was big for a wild cheetah, but for shifters the size of the animal could vary by how big the person was in human form. “Dude, I was just teasing. You’re all so hot and yummy looking. I don’t really want to eat you, like, for dinner.” Fine, whatever. We ignored him and ran toward the back of the property where there was a forest of trees and under bush. Raz spotted the first bunny, and we all sped up. I laughed inside as I leapt over Rash to take the lead. “Show-off,” he grumbled in our link. “Hey, I got wicked hops. It’s not my fault.” I snickered and everyone laughed in our heads. This was nice, exactly what I needed right then. It was easy and playful. There was no pressure, no drama, no pain, simply instinct and my brothers. I “tagged” the first rabbit, nudging it with my nose to show I could have caught it with my teeth. Ragu found the next one, and Cam ended up winning that race far ahead of the rest of us. “Something’s wrong,” he whimpered as we ran to catch up. “I smell blood, sick blood.” He groaned and then flopped over. Son of a bitch! “I smell it, too, Cass,” Ragu cried out in our minds as he moved to our brother’s side. “Fuck! Shit! It’s not human, but it’s not vamp either. It’s like a gross combo! And I smell more than one.” I had seconds to think. Ragu was the fastest in our litter, and I was the best fighter. That’s as far as I got in the thought process before I came up with a plan and started barking out orders, because I saw what we smelled and we were in deep shit. We were out of time to think or debate. “Ragu, run back and let the guards know what we smelled. Raz, shift back and carry Cam. Rash, you flank them in cheetah form.” “What about you?” Rash asked in a panic as the others did what I said.

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“I’m going to buy you time to get Cam home,” I said with a growl, though that was for our approaching threat and not my brother. “But, Cass—” “Do it now! If they get by me, you’ll be there to protect Cam.” He hesitated a moment and then ran after Raz, who was already running full speed with Cam in his arms. Thankfully, Cam shifted back to human form moments after passing out when smelling blood. “I love you, Cass. Be safe,” Rash whispered in my head. “Always, brother,” I answered and then ran in the opposite direction as them. I raced towards danger to give them a chance. The closer I got, the more I wanted to pass out from the smell of blood. Something was very, very wrong with the two men moving toward me. There was blood dripping from their mouths and down their bodies as if they’d been chewing on something or someone while it had still been alive. I stopped when I was about ten feet away from them and snarled. I wasn’t stupid enough to think that they were friendly, but I was going to give them the chance to turn around. We could give chase and find out what was going on after I had reinforcements. But if these guys were some type of fucked up vamps, I was sorely out- manned here. They didn’t stop or flee, of course, though they did hesitate. Then it was like someone smacked them upside the head and barked out some unheard orders, because they started moving faster. They weren’t really running, but it wasn’t a walk, and it wasn’t a human movement either. What were these things? I smelled death and rancid blood as I leapt on the first one, tearing the side of his throat out as we went down. The other one picked me up around the middle, and I reached behind me with claws, tearing his neck and head as best as I could. Then the fucker bit me! He didn’t sink fangs or canines in me, but these were seriously not human teeth either.

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I swung the lower half of my body enough to throw him off balance, and we went down. He landed on his back as I fell into him. I might have only been one hundred and fifty pounds, but I was a long, strong, one- fifty with claws. I rolled over in a flash, my front paws on his chest and claws digging in. He opened his mouth and hissed at me. I froze for an instant as I saw his teeth. Yeah, so not human. They were longer than human teeth but not fangs. And all of them were pointed as if someone filed them that way. For one, it was gross. Two, they were yellow, rotten-looking, and covered with my blood. Did I mention gross? I smelled burning, and I couldn’t figure out what it was at first until the guy spit in my face again. Dear god, it was me. I was burning from his spit! Yeah, he so had to die. I moved so my back paws were on his thighs and reached with my right front paw and clawed at his throat. I was doing a pretty good job even though his skin was like leather and hard to dig through, when something collided into me from the side. The first one tackled me to the ground, biting my paw as we went down. Fuck that hurt and burned! And how the hell had he survived his throat being torn out? I went with the momentum of our fall and kept us rolling until we were farther away from the second monster and I was on top. He wasn’t expecting that and left his throat exposed. I wasn’t fucking around this time. I tore at his neck as I clawed to get at his heart until I severed his head. It took a matter of moments, and I had just enough time to brace myself when I saw the second one out of the corner of my eyes. I turned at the last moment, meeting him head-on as our bodies collided. He bit me on the shoulder as I tried to tear out his heart with my teeth. The angle he came at me prevented me from having access to his heart. He screamed, and it was the most inhuman sound, more like a banshee from a movie. It hurt my ears to the point I worried it would pop my eardrums. We landed hard, me on the bottom, and I felt rocks

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cut into my back. I tore at his chest again, harder this time, before the noise he was making did something to me, since I was starting to feel nauseous from it. I finally got through his rib cage as he bit me again. I used my claws to dig out the heart and tossed it away from us. He went limp, the life, or whatever made him able to move, dying from his eyes. I pushed him off of me and watched in horror as he disintegrated into ash. Glancing over at the other one, all I saw where his body had been was a pile of the same stuff. What the fuck were these things? “Cass!” I heard Logan scream at the top of his lungs. I started to move in that direction, my body feeling sluggish now that the fight was over. It took me five steps to realize it was more than that. I felt like bleach had been poured over my body where they had bitten me or their blood had hit. The smell of burning flesh and fur was too much. I threw up, wanting to get as much of their blood out of me as I could. That and I felt sick from the smell and realized my mouth and throat were burning as well. It was like I swallowed a bottle of acid, and how the fuck did I treat that? “Cass,” Logan shouted as he raced to me. I saw him in time before he got close enough to touch me, and shifted back, flopping down on the ground. “Don’t touch me,” I choked out, my own blood filling my throat and mouth. He froze two feet from me, his eyes going wide as Curtis got close. “Acid. Their blood is acid.” “Jesus, he’s fucking burning from the inside out,” Logan wailed, his face a mask of panic. “What do we do?” “I don’t know,” Curtis answered as he came closer. “What hurts, Cass?” I tried to answer but coughed up blood instead. More people got to us then, one of them Sari, our family science geek. He shifted back in a flash and never slowed down.

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“Get Mylanta or whatever acid reducer you have,” he barked out to Curtis. I had to hand it to them. They never hesitated or let their minds fog with fear. “I need plastic bags and ice packs, too. We have to control the acid or it will keep burning him. Water won’t stop it. Diets will also know what to do.” “On it,” Curtis said quickly as he ran back towards the house, already talking into a two-way radio. “Cam?” I finally choked out after several tries. “He’s fine, big brother,” Sari said tenderly as he ran his hands over my body where I wasn’t burning. I couldn’t get enough air as I kept spitting up more blood. “His airway isn’t clear, and he’s not getting any oxygen.” “What do we do?” Logan asked in a high voice as he knelt beside me. “Don’t you dare die, Cass. Stay with us!” “Can you shift just your hand into claws?” “Yeah,” Logan answered and did what Sari asked. “Call Curtis and tell him I also need tape and a straw.” “What are you? MacGyver?” Logan asked with shock as he clicked on the radio and told Curtis what we needed. I felt the blackness swarm over me as I kept choking. “Cass, roll to your side. It will help until they get here,” Sari said firmly. “Don’t you fucking pass out yet. They’re fast enough to be here soon, okay, brother? Just hang on, and then I promise I’ll let you rest.” I nodded as best as I could and did as he asked. My eyes went wide with fear as the pain started to go away. I didn’t know much, but I knew that was bad. But the more immediate threat was that I was only getting small gasps of air when I could spit up enough of my blood. It felt like hours that I was there in agony, though I knew it was only a matter of minutes. Vamps were too damn fast for it to have taken longer than that.

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“I’ve got a Hummer driving over here so we can move him,” Curtis announced as he dove onto the ground next to Sari and handed him what he needed. “Good,” Sari replied as he got everything in order. “Curtis, hold him where he’s not burned.” The edges of my visions started to go black, and then someone hit me. “Not yet, Cass. Give me one more minute.” I think I nodded, but everything was starting to go hazy then. “Logan, push your claw in here as far as it will go,” Sari ordered. I felt pressure, but no pain, on the side of my left ribs. Yeah, I was dying if I didn’t feel someone piercing my skin. Sari slid something into my chest, moved a bag over it, and suddenly I could breathe. It wasn’t great breathing, but it was better than drowning and choking on my own blood. “Okay, Cass, you can pass out now,” Sari said gently as he grabbed the bottle of Mylanta and opened it. “I love you, big bro. We’re going to fix you, but you have to fight. You’ve got mates and a family who would die inside if we lost you.” And then I was out.

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Chapter 5 Merrick’s perspective I wanted to shift and run straight to Cass as Logan and Curtis did. But the downside to being a straight shape-shifter without any certain flavor was it took more concentration to shift. Cass and his brothers simply had to release their cat and let it take over. I, on the other hand, had to focus on what animal I wanted. What they looked like, sounded like, how they moved, et cetera. It was easy under normal circumstances, with practice, but under stressful times like now… It was damn near impossible. Instead, I raced after Mitchell when Curtis ordered to bring one of the Hummers around in case Cass was hurt. Dear god, don’t let him be hurt! We moved quickly, listening to the landmarks Curtis was seeing to give Mitchell a clearer picture of where they were heading. “We’ve got him. It’s bad,” Curtis said into the two-way radio, and I felt my heart shatter. “I’m running back to get the supplies Sari wants, and, Hayden, I need—” He rattled off some list that made no sense to me, and I stopped listening. We had to go way the fuck around where they were because of the massive clumping of trees in the way. After what seemed like forever, Mitchell pulled in slowly between the largest opening we could find. I saw Curtis and Logan standing, their heads together as they talked. Logan was crying, and I knew just how bad it was then. Mitchell didn’t even get a chance to stop the Hummer before I was out the door and running to them. My brain couldn’t seem to process what I was seeing until I was right on them. Over a third of

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Cass’s body was burnt with huge wounds that were covered in white crap. There was a straw attached to a baggie in his chest, and he was passed out. “Holy shit!” I gasped when I saw how much blood was all around him. Did one body have that much? “What? How?” “We don’t know,” Logan answered as he stepped away from Curtis and came to me. I walked into his embrace, my eyes never leaving what Sari, Cass’s brother, was doing. “Cass was able to tell us that whatever those things were had acid for blood. He was burned where he was bitten and where their blood hit him.” “This is not Aliens, Logan,” I growled and pushed him away. “There’s no paranormal or supernatural being that has acid for blood.” “There is no being that turns to ash either,” he said firmly as he pointed a few feet away from Cass on the ground. I followed his hand and saw, sure enough, there was pile of ash. And there was another one several feet away from the first one. “We don’t know what they were.” “I’m sorry,” I whispered, still staring at the ash. I basically called him a liar, but shit, who would just go “okay” when someone tells them that? “It’s fine, babe,” he said tenderly and pulled me back under his arm. “Sari’s treating the wounds with antacid in the form of Mylanta. But Cass got their blood in his mouth and throat during the attack and couldn’t breathe.” “How did you know to do that?” I asked Sari as Mitchell and Curtis helped move Cass onto a plastic tarp from the Hummer. “Discovery Channel,” he answered with a shrug then focused on Curtis. “Is Diets setting up a clean room for burn victims?” “Yes, and Conley’s sending their best doc in one of his helicopters as we speak. The doc agreed with you that it would be too much for Cass to move to him”

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“Okay then, on the count of three.” Sari counted it off, and the two vampires lifted my mate while Sari held the straw and baggie that was letting Cass breathe. I moved to open the back of the Hummer, and they loaded him in. “We need to get him back to the compound fast, Mitchell. But it’s more important not to jar him.” “Got it,” he replied as we all climbed in Sari in the back with Cass. The drive back was excruciating, but at least Cass didn’t wake up in pain during it. It scared me to death that he was out for the count, though I was grateful for it at the same time. Finally we got back to the house, and Kale met us at the side door with a gurney. They quickly, but carefully, loaded Cass onto it and wheeled him in the house. “I need to call our Council,” Curtis said and exchanged a look with Logan. He gave the leader a nod, and Curtis jogged toward his office as we went to the elevator. “What’s going on?” I asked as Mitchell raised an eyebrow. “There’s no known creature whose blood burns and who turns to ash,” Logan hedged as we rode the elevator up. “But there is a legend about vampires being able to turn humans into some form of zombie bloodsucker.” “Seriously?” Mitchell and I said at the same time. “Yes, but it’s an old, old legend, but from what Raz and Rash told us, it’s our closest guess,” he answered with a sigh as the elevator doors opened. Kale and Sari pushed the gurney toward the medical center that was in construction. “We’re born vampires, but this is more like human legends of what we are. A vampire is said to drain a human, give them their blood, and they rise days later as almost one of us.” “But why the acid blood?” Mitchell asked. “We’re not sure, but it’s supposed to turn the human into soulless, mindless beings. They become zombies that only do the bidding of their master with no thoughts of their own and drink any blood they

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can get. I don’t really know specifics, because it’s supposed to be just a legend. It’s one of those bedtime stories to scare little vampires on the dangers of drinking straight from humans and not controlling their thirst.” “I got one of the guys to go get more antacid and the doc here was able to scrounge up a nebulizer. He made up a calcium gluconate mixture for Cass to breathe. It’s the best we could do on short notice,” Diets said as they wheeled Cass into a curtained-off area. He did a good job of clearing as much of the construction materials off to the side so they could have a sterile area. “And that’s to help his internal burns?” I asked, staying out of the way with Logan, though I wanted nothing more than to go to Cass and hold him in my arms. “That’s what we use when we deal with chemical inhalation burns on the job,” Diets answered, and Kale nodded in agreement. “We’re giving him a lower dose than normal because different acids can react differently and need various treatments. But since this is standard operating procedure, we’re going with it.” “We trust that you know what you’re doing and your concern for him is overruling that you’re mad at him,” Logan said very calmly and carefully. I’d forgotten that Diets was pissed at Cass with all the worry. Glad one of us was thinking clearly. “Look, I apologized to Shem, and I’m already groveling for his forgiveness,” Diets replied and wiped his hands over his face in frustration. “I was a rat bastard for what I said, but yes, I’m pissed at Cass. He’s been a good friend to Curtis and me, so of course I don’t want him hurt or dead. He hurt Shem, a lot, by not telling Shem what had happened. Hell, I was hurt, and I’ve only known him a little while.” “I can understand that,” I said with a sigh as I felt Logan nod. This really wasn’t the time to get into all of this, but I understood why Logan brought it up. We needed to know that Diets was pissed but

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still had the kind of character that wouldn’t allow him to endanger our mate. His answer sufficed for me. “I’ll be groveling to Cass as soon as he’s up as well. He didn’t deserve the crap I said, and I was sorry I did the second I left the room. It was petty and bitchy. I was just worried about Shem. He’s so tenderhearted, and I can’t bear to see him upset. Cass hiding what happened and his pain all this time really broke Shem’s heart.” “I love you, too,” Shem said from the doorway. We all turned to look and saw all of Cass’s brothers standing there. “But he’s my brother, and I love him just as much as you, Diets. He didn’t do it to hurt me or any of us. He was in too much pain suffering from grief and PTSD to realize the effects of keeping to himself.” “I know, and I’m sorry, angel,” Diets whispered, blinking rapidly. “Can you forgive me?” “Do your best to save my brother, and I want a blow job every day for a month,” Shem replied with a smirk after a couple moments. “And then we’ll call it even.” “I can do that.” Diets snickered and jumped back into the mix. “Fuck, I’ll give him a blow job every day for the rest of his life if he can save Cass,” I said without thinking. “Curtis and I have Diets covered, but thanks,” Shem replied without missing a beat. “Right, sorry, wasn’t really thinking.” I swear my entire body blushed with embarrassment. Shem shrugged as they all stepped into the large room. “No worries.” We were all careful to stay several feet back and out of the way. I glanced over at all of Cass’s siblings, minus Sari. They were all leaning on each other, comforting each other. It made me miss Rolf yet again. I quelled the anger that always rose when I thought of my poor brother. Now was not the time to get distracted and wallow in the past.

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It was funny, but I didn’t even think to miss my parents. I’d walked away from them, never looking back, after Rolf’s death. They didn’t understand why I blamed them, and part of me wondered if they’d ever get that it was their fault. But the big question was whether I’d be burying someone else close to me soon. Would I have to live through burying my mate days after finally claiming him? I didn’t think I could survive it. I still had nightmares and flashbacks of my own to the day Rolf was buried. I shook myself out of my morbid thoughts. I was not giving up on Cass. No way, no how, no sir! “He’s not healing,” the doc growled in frustration before turning to us. “He’s had your blood, Logan?” “Yes, when he claimed me, but not a lot,” he answered, his body stiff with apprehension. “That should be enough. Get over here and give us some blood,” he ordered and started pulling more equipment out of the cabinet. “Our best bet might be to filter his blood. Whatever those things were, he swallowed too much of their acid when he killed them. It’s not allowing him to heal and repair the damage.” “Will that work?” I asked, trying to swallow the panic. “I don’t know,” the doc answered as he stuck Cass with a needle before meeting my eyes. “I’ve never seen anything like this in all my centuries, and I’m a vampire doctor, not a shifter one. This is my best guess.” “Okay, let’s do this then,” Logan said confidently and gave me a kiss on the head before moving toward them. “Would blood from his litter help, too?” “That was what I was going to say next, but I want yours first since you’re his mate and we’re immortal. While shifters heal fast, we can heal even faster.” I watched, feeling weak-kneed as the doc hooked Logan right up to Cass. This had to work. If I prayed, I would have right then. Fuck, I’d start praying to just get some help.

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“Hold him down so he doesn’t hurt himself!” Sari shouted as Cass went into convulsions. Everyone hopped to it as I was suddenly kneeling on the floor. “Is the blood making it worse?” “No, I think it’s from rapid healing,” the doc answered. “Where are we at?” a man asked loudly as he walked into the room with Curtis. Was this the doctor from Conley’s estate already? Had it been that long? I had no clue since I was literally watching my greatest fears and worst nightmares all at once. The doctors huddled together, Curtis’ guy filling in the new one when Cass stopped thrashing around. Someone who helped at the make-shift clinic was taking blood from Rash, who I guessed was going next. “He’s going to make it,” Ham said gently as he knelt down next to me. “Cass is one of the strongest people I’ve ever met. And he’s a stubborn ass.” “I hope so,” I whispered and let him hug me. I met Logan’s gaze across the room, and he looked just as worried. The doc disconnected Logan from Cass and put the bag of Rash’s blood into his IV. We all waited with bated breath to see if he’d start seizing again. It hurt to watch, but if it was his body’s way of healing faster when he couldn’t shift to jump start it, then so be it. “His wounds are starting to close,” Sari said and glanced at Conley’s doc, Dr. Norton. “I’ve not added anymore antacid.” “Which means he’s healed a good deal on the inside if his body is working on the outside,” Dr. Norton said with a nod and started jotting down notes. “What does that mean? He chooses what gets healed?” Logan asked, none too friendly, as if he was worried some quack was treating our mate. “Vampires are more like humans in the way you heal,” he explained calmly, while Logan’s facial expressions were anything but calm. I had to give it to the doc for being able to not cower from someone as big as Logan when they were angry. “When you’re

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injured the white blood cells in your body work to heal and clot wounds without prejudice. “Shifters, on the other hand, have bodies that heal the most lifethreatening wounds first. So while we heal quicker most times than shifters from smaller injuries, they actually are able to survive worse wounds than we can.” “I didn’t know that,” the first doc said with his eyebrows raised. Logan gave him a dirty look and might have growled as he curled his upper lip over his teeth. The doc held up his hands in surrender. “I told you I wasn’t a shifter doctor. And hell, it’s not like there’s real training on this stuff since we’re not all organized. We just kinda wing it as best we can as we learn, or people like Dr. Norton know from experience.” “Okay, this is all great, and I’m glad we’re all learning something new,” Ham said loudly as he helped me get to my feet. Everyone turned to him as he stood there staring them down individually with his hands on his hips. “So is this good news or what? Is Cass going to live? Get to the good part here, people!” “Yes, his heart rate is better and his blood pressure is rising,” Dr. Norton said with a smile. “I’m going to want blood from the rest of his litter to add to his white cell count, and we’re going to run a few more cycles of the nebulizer over the next twenty- four hours. But I feel confident in saying that he’s out of the woods. I can’t tell you if there will be any permanent damage just yet but—” “Shifters don’t get permanent damage, doc,” Ham snarled and stepped forward. “We either live and recover, or we don’t live. So what are you talking about?” Curtis exchanged a look with Dr. Norton, who nodded that the leader should take over. “It’s not that simple in this case, Ham. The doctors have never seen injuries from creatures like the ones in the woods. We don’t know what possible lasting effects their blood could have had on Cass.”

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“But you talked to your Council, right? I mean, they’ll have answers?” I asked, not willing to concede that Cass could have scars or worse from what happened. Plus, we just needed more answers. “He’s stable for now, Dr. Norton?” Curtis asked waiting until the man nodded. “Then Dr. Frost, please stay with Cass and follow Dr. Norton’s orders. I’m going to talk to the kitchen staff about breakfast, and let’s meet in the main dining room in about fifteen minutes. That should give everyone enough time to give blood, get cleaned up, or whatever.” “What’s going on, Curtis?” Shem replied, crossing his arms over his chest as if to say he wasn’t going anywhere just yet. “I’m going to tell you everything I know, my angel, but please let’s get everyone together so I’m not saying it ten times.” “Fine, but I want an omelet with bacon and waffles then,” Shem said with a pout. Oh yeah, he had to be a handful. Not that Cass was easy or drama free, but I wouldn’t trade my Cowell brother for all the world. Everyone dispersed, doing what they needed to as Logan and I sat in chairs next to Cass’s bed. We sat in silence, taking in our mate’s sleeping form as thoughts swirled around in our minds. Finally, I was able to pick out one that kept floating to the surface that I just couldn’t seem to grab. “You don’t think he did this on purpose, do you?” I whispered to Logan. “I mean, I know he didn’t make these creatures but—” I trailed off, not sure how to finish that thought. “No, and I’ll tell you why I’m one hundred percent sure of that. If Cass had died, those things could have gotten to his brothers before they got to safety. He would risk his life no problem to save them, but he wouldn’t have given up and let them kill him when it could have meant their death.” “Okay, that’s what I thought, too,” I said with a sigh of relief. “There’s just been so much going on and drama with him, I needed to ask the question out loud.”

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“The thought crossed my mind, too, Merrick,” he whispered as if worried Cass would hear us. “But I know what I said is true.” “Me, too.” We exchanged one of those looks that only couples could have that said so much without a word. That we were on the same page and we had faith. “I want to be a part of the conversation with Curtis, but I don’t want to leave Cass.” “I swear on my honor I will send Nathaniel down right away if there is the slightest change,” Dr. Frost said gently. So that was the other guy’s name. I felt guilty for not asking sooner who everyone was, but I figured I got a free pass right then. “Thank you,” Logan replied with a weak smile as we stood and left. Five minutes later, we were seated next to each other, close to Curtis and Mitchell, as everyone piled food onto their plates. It struck me as cold that people were eating breakfast as if it was just another day when my mate was fighting for his life upstairs. “No!” Cam shouted and shoved Raz away. “It’s my fault! If I wasn’t pathetic and didn’t faint all the goddamn time, Cass wouldn’t have had to fight those things.” “It’s not your fault, Cam,” Shem growled. “And you know Cass! He would have done the exact same thing even if you hadn’t passed out. He still would have wanted to give you guys as much time as possible to get to safety.” “Yeah, that sounds like Cass.” Ham chuckled and wrapped his arm around Cam. “You know it does.” I glanced around and saw all the nods of agreement from his brothers and even some of the vampires. “I spoke to one of the eldest Council members,” Curtis said after a few minutes when everyone quieted down and got settled. “The Followers are real.” I heard Logan’s sharp intake of breath next to me. “That’s not possible, Curtis,” Mitchell replied with a worried look on his face. “They’re just legend.”

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“Not according to the Council.” Curtis let out a sigh and rubbed his hands over his face. “They are very real but not quite what the stories say.” “Okay, start from the beginning for those of us who don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about.” I seconded Ham on that one. What were Followers? “Right, sorry,” Curtis said quickly. “Most vampires are told the story about undead human servants called Followers as a warning tale when we go through puberty and start drinking blood we then need to survive. The stories say that the Followers are like a cross between human beliefs of what vampires are and mindless humans who do vampire biddings like in Bram Stoker’s Dracula.” “My parents used to say they were vampire lackeys that would do anything for that vamp’s blood because they survived off of it,” Mitchell added. “Okay, so that’s the legend,” Shem said with a nod. “What’s the truth?” “It’s much worse than that,” Curtis answered with a pained expression on his face. “Only really old, ancient, vampires can create Followers, and it’s not an accident. Parents tell their kids tales to keep us afraid of drinking too much from humans and killing them when we’re learning to control our new thirst for blood. But young vampires can’t create them. Hell, I couldn’t even do it because I’m not old enough. “The ancient vampire drains the human, killing them. Then they cut their wrist and fill the human’s mouth with their blood and bleed into a cut over the human’s heart. Councilman Beall said they then bury the human in a shallow grave for a few days. These humans rise to become more like zombies than anything. They have an insatiable bloodlust, have no higher brain function, and can only follow simple commands.” “Fuck,” Hayden gasped, and I heard several other groans around the table. Yeah, I felt that way, too. “Like we don’t have enough shit

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with the Hunters? Now we’ve got zombie, crazed, turned blood sucking creatures coming after us?” “Yeah, I know,” Curtis sighed and suddenly looked very old. Shem moved his arm to slide into his mate’s lap so he could give comfort. I thought it was an odd time to get all cuddly and kissy faced, but then again, if I had Cass here right now, I was pretty sure I’d be doing the same thing. “So fine, the Followers are real and not really what we thought they were,” Logan said after a few beats when everyone started to get lost in their own thoughts. “But why are they here? Why now? I’ve been alive for over a century and never heard of one for real. And if there’s some ancient vampire around here creating those things, we’re in deep shit. Doesn’t Conley have a list of all the vamps in the area?” “Yes and no,” Curtis answered and then winced at how that sounded like he had no clue about his area. “We know of all registered vamps who stick to Council rules. But even the humans can’t keep track of their own population, and their census takes place every few years. Hell, some slip through paying their taxes. We aren’t even that well organized, and we’re much more powerful. The Council only started recording where vamps were several centuries ago.” “So if this one is that old, there could be no record of them?” Mitchell asked, rubbing his temples. Yeah, I felt a migraine coming on as well. “But I agree with Logan. We need to find out why they’re here now.” “Councilman Beall says we’re not the only ones who’ve had sightings.” I felt the tension level in the room elevate at what Curtis said. “But Cass is the only surviving person to come into contact with them. The others died almost immediately after the attack. At first it was random killings, and no one had any clue what was going on. Then a few were seen from a distance, and some were attacked but didn’t make it.”

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“Because of the acid blood? What’s up with that anyways?” Ham asked, throwing his hands up in the air in frustration. “I mean, damn. How do you fight something like that?” “Councilman Beall mentioned sending the Guard,” Curtis whispered as if speaking of the boogeyman. “Fuck!” Mitchell exclaimed and actually stood up so fast he knocked over his chair. “No, they can’t come here.” I didn’t know Mitchell, but I got the sense that he didn’t scare easy. All the vampires looked like they were ready to shit their pants at this new development. “Seriously, if you guys don’t stop talking in riddles, I’m going to find whatever decoder ring you all are using and shove it up someone’s ass,” Ham said with a snarl. “What the fuck is the Guard? The National Guard?” “They’re ghosts,” Hayden whispered as he went pale. “They’re like the vampire police, Council assassins, and warriors all rolled into one scary-ass package.” “Yeah, that’s pretty accurate,” Curtis replied. “There are legends that the Guard wiped out Atlantis. They are faster, stronger, and older than anything we’ve ever seen.” “But we’ve done nothing wrong!” Mitchell shouted and then his face went blank. He quickly took his seat, looking embarrassed at his outburst. “Why send them here?” “The Council was already talking of sending them to help us with the Hunters,” Curtis answered and shook his head. “Councilman Beall assured me that they are not coming for us but to help us. They are the police for vampires, after all, and our warriors. This is a time when we need them.” “Fuck that,” Logan said firmly, and he was shaking so badly that I could feel it sitting next to him. “We can handle this on our own. We don’t need them coming over here. What if they decide that we know too much, Curtis? They could kill us all, and no one would be the wiser.”

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“I have the same fear.” Curtis and my mate shared a look that spoke volumes that we were ass-deep in alligators. “But I trust Councilman Beall, and so does Conley. He said that they’re coming to help, and since we’re not the only ones that have had a run- in with Followers, that it’s time they let everyone know that they are real.” “I’ve never seen you scared,” Shem whispered as he wrapped Curtis’ arms around him tighter. “Are these Guards that big and bad?” “We’re fast, Shem, but these guys are like deadly ghosts. I’ve heard of whole covens wiped out without a trace because the Guard was called in.” “But those covens were doing something wrong. I mean, they just don’t randomly kill you guys, right?” Luca asked as he glanced around the room. “We shouldn’t have anything to be afraid of. People fear the police when they’ve done something wrong or have something to hide. Upstanding citizens aren’t scared of the police.” “In general, that’s true,” Mitchell hedged as if thinking of how to explain why they were scared. “But when the police are actually a death squad that you have no hope in fighting against if something goes wrong or they think you know more than you should, then yeah, you fear them.” Well, fuck. When he put it that way, I was ready to shit my pants, too. Anything else? Next we’d have angels and demons fighting in our front yard. Then again, maybe we already did with the way things were going.

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Chapter 6 Cass’s perspective First thing when I woke up, I realized I was surrounded by three of my brothers. Sari was lying on my right, Raz on my left, and Cam was curled around my legs. So I guess that meant I was alive? I started to ask, but my throat was too dry to work, and my eyelids kept wanting to close. What the hell had happened that my mouth and throat felt like wool pads? “Water,” I croaked out as I pushed Sari gently. His eyes popped open, and he stared at me a moment before a wide smile broke out on his face. “Welcome back, brother,” he whispered and kissed my cheek. “You had us all worried.” I pointed to my throat since I couldn’t get it to work again. He nodded that he understood and climbed out of bed. “Do you remember fighting those creatures?” he asked when he came back over and held out a spoon of ice chips. I thought about it while I swallowed them down. Oh, sweet mercy, that felt good. “Yes, they burned me,” I answered and gestured for more. He gave them to me, and each spoonful made me feel less dead to the world. “How long have I been out?” “Couple of days,” Sari said with a smile. “Everyone’s fine, and I’ll explain what those things were and what you’ve missed after Dr. Norton checks you out.” “Fair enough,” I whispered. I was okay to talk as long as it wasn’t at normal volume.

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“Wake up you lazy cat,” Sari said as he pushed Raz’s hip until he woke up. “Feed Cass some ice ships while I get the doc.” “Right, okay,” he replied with a yawn and took it from Sari. I was waiting for him to put two and three together and realize I was awake. He yawned and held another spoon to my mouth and then dropped it as his eyes went wide. “You’re awake! Are you okay?” “I think so,” I snickered and picked up what I could of the ice he dropped on my chest. “Shit, sorry, I wasn’t really awake yet.” He scrambled to help me and then went back to feeding me. “We’ve been taking shifts sleeping in bed with you while you heal. Dr. Norton is a shifter specialist, and he said not just the same litter but same type of shifter can help heal injuries with their body heat. Kind of like a big puppy pile, but we’ve got some juice to help you get better.” “I didn’t know that,” I said before taking another spoonful. “I thought it was only our litter.” “I guess the same litter is better but, like, wolves aren’t born in a litter. So other wolves, preferably the same pack, can help heal.” “You learn something new every day.” I chuckled and then started wiggling my feet against Shem. “Welcome back.” He giggled as he nipped my ankle to get me to stop. “You had us very worried, big bro.” “I’m not going anywhere, baby bro,” I replied with a smile. “But you were going to leave us before you met your mates,” Shem said quietly his mood going dark. “Would you really have left?” I took a moment to think about it and my mindset at the time. “Yes, but not for good. I needed to get away from everything and sort some things out before I exploded. I wouldn’t have just dropped off the face of the earth, and I would have come back.” “Okay, I can understand that, but from now on you’re going to tell us when shit’s going on with you. No more of this Lone Ranger crap that you have to handle it on your own. You’d beat us if we ever

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pulled that, and we should expect the same amount of honesty from you. We’re stronger together, Cass.” “I knew you were more than just the cute one,” I replied after a few moments of mulling over what he said. “And you’re right. Never again.” “Good.” I think he might have said more, but a strange man came in with Sari, followed by my mates. “Nice to meet you, Cass. I’m Dr. Norton,” he said and extended his hand, which I shook. “I’m one of the doctors at Conley’s compound. I specialize in shifters even though I’m a vampire, and he brought me in to help with all the injured captives from the circuses that were rescued.” “I appreciate you coming to save me.” I smiled at him. It was a genuine smile that I meant even though I was still tired as could be. He nodded and started taking my vitals. It was somewhat awkward, so I turned to Sari. “Fill me in on what I missed.” And damn did he ever! Followers and the Guard and all kinds of goodies. The doctor was long done with his exam and writing down notes when Sari wrapped up. “Well, shit,” I sighed and closed my eyes. “We just can’t ever get a moment’s peace can we? Do we know when this magical Guard is coming?” “No official word yet,” Logan answered. “Councilman Beall is coordinating with Conley right now.” “Has anyone talked to our Council?” I asked directly to Sari. He shook his head and glanced at Logan, who did the same. “Dad had a friend on the Council, and I think it’s time we called him. They need to know about this, and I want to talk to them firsthand about all the updates Conley has been giving them.” “You don’t trust Conley?” Logan’s eyes went wide at the idea, and I realized that he may be my mate, but he’d been a vampire much longer, and that was where his loyalties lay.

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“I’m not saying that at all,” I answered firmly, so he knew I was serious. “But we are shifters, and our Council needs to know that this could affect us. Also, they might be more inclined to throw in their resources hearing it from one of us as opposed to a high ranking vampire.” “Makes sense,” Merrick said with a nod. “Plus, this scary Guard or whatever might be less inclined to wipe out anyone here if our Council knows what’s going on.” I innocently blinked at him until the lightbulb seemed to go off over his head. “You Machiavellian brat!” he exclaimed with a smile. “That’s why you’re calling the guy.” “Cass would never do something like that to make sure we were all safe,” Shem said sarcastically with a snort. “He’s good with plans. We don’t just refer to him always because he’s the oldest. I mean, our sisters technically are, but they kinda live in their own world.” “Is the Councilman’s name in the box of dad’s stuff we have in our room?” Sari asked hesitantly, trying to interrupt the conversation before we went in too deep with our plan. The truth of it was that there wasn’t a box. I had my dad’s phone book, journal, and a few other personal items in a safe under my bed that Curtis’ men retrieved when they went to collect our belongings when we moved here. “Yes,” I answered instead of correcting him. “Can you call the guy? I’m sure he’s got an assistant you need to go through. Let him know who we are, and see if there’s a time I can talk to him later today or tomorrow. Don’t give away the farm of information to the assistant. I trust the Councilman because dad did, but until we know more we shouldn’t trust anyone else.” “Why?” Sari asked with a raised eyebrow. “Because I think it’s us the Followers are after,” I replied evenly, as if I just reported what the weather was. “And how did you come to that conclusion?” Dr. Norton asked. He was kind of in the background until then, and I wasn’t sure he was

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included in what was happening. I glanced over to Logan and waited for his nod to answer. “Because everyone keeps asking, why now? Why are these Followers coming here, and what has changed that they would? We’ve changed. This has always been a vampire coven and head of the covens for three states. Yes, Curtis is now in charge instead of Harold, but Harold died several months ago. What has changed is we’ve moved here. So either this is some revenge plot against Curtis, which affects us, or it’s directed at us.” “You really are the man with the plan. Glad you’re on my side,” Merrick said after a few moments, breaking the silence. I almost wanted to laugh at the shocked faces of the two vampires in the room. “Are you well enough to move?” “Yeah, and I’m starving,” I replied with a snicker. The doctor cleared me for getting up and around, making sure to say that I needed to shift after lunch to help heal faster. But he didn’t want me doing too much for the next few days and to remember that I’d almost died. Then we headed downstairs for some lunch as Shem went ahead of us to get everyone rounded up so we could talk. The kitchen staff was laying out trays of cold cuts, sides, and an assortment of chips that looked so yummy that I wanted to kiss each of the staff in turn. “Glad you’re better,” Merrick whispered as he helped me to my seat and kissed my cheek. “Thank you, Meri,” I replied and turned to kiss his cheek before doing the same to Logan. It was about the biggest step I could take right then, but almost dying made some things that had once seemed so important almost silly. Like my fear that my mates were going to trample all over my heart. I needed to get over my shit already. “Meri, I like that.” He smiled. “Yeah, I do, too.” Logan chuckled as they sat down on either side of me. I couldn’t help but snicker as they coddled me, making my lunch and worrying over me. It was nice, and I was so used to taking

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care of everyone else that for once I sat back and let someone else be in charge. “Welcome back,” Curtis said as he walked in the dining room, kissing the top of my head in a brotherly gesture. “You scared the shit out of us.” “Those things scared me,” I replied with a snicker, and everyone froze. “What?” “Did Sari tell you that you’re the only known survivor that ever came up against Followers?” Mitchell asked as he eyed me over with a fighter’s appreciation. “No, he left that part out,” I answered as my eyebrows shot up in shock. “I can’t be the only one.” “You are, and the Council wants to speak with you about exactly what happened,” Curtis said softly. I thought about that as everyone started filing in the room, saying hi, and my brothers were giving me hugs. It took a little while, but eventually everyone settled down, got food, and started to eat. “Can you tell us what you remember?” Mitchell asked after I finished my first sandwich. “I remember everything up until Sari said I could pass out,” I replied. Had I been worse than I thought from the fight, and they assumed the trauma of it made my memory go? I told them everything, including how quickly the Followers regenerated and moved when attacking. I described their scent, their freaky teeth, lack of intelligence, and on, and on. “But they weren’t very fast in the beginning,” I said, more to myself than anyone else as I wrapped up. That had been bugging me. “You said they lose higher brain function almost like zombies, because they’re actually dead and then become the undead. I honestly think the best way to kill these things would be with Kale and Diets’s high powered rifles.” “Explain that,” Curtis replied with a raised eyebrow.

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“They didn’t move like humans or vampires or even shifters,” I said as I scratched my head and tried to figure out the best way to describe what I was thinking. “They were almost uncoordinated as they approached me. And when I roared at them, they seem to hesitate until maybe their master reminded them of their orders. But when we were actually fighting and grappling, they were quicker. “I think they can listen to orders, and anything other than instinct is lost on them. I mean, when we were fighting, it was survival intuition. They weren’t using their acid blood on me as a weapon. They were biting and clawing like a wild animal or someone desperate to survive.” “So they didn’t use any strategy or thought process to try and win,” Mitchell said, and I nodded in agreement. He was starting to understand what I was getting at. “Then you’re right about how to beat them. The key is to not engage with them closely. If we can keep them at a distance when they’re still uncoordinated, then their main weapon of their blood won’t be an issue. I’d say guns or broad swords if necessary.” “Yeah, but who knows how to use a friggin’ sword anymore?” Shem asked with a snicker. “The Guard does,” Hayden answered quietly enough to almost whisper. “But the guns would be better. Can we get some bigger rifles and someone to teach us how to use them? If we practice enough, we could set up guards that stay on the rooftop for normal patrols.” “We could teach you what we know,” Diets said and glanced at Kale. “And we know which guns would be best. Hell, we could mount them on the roof at certain tactical points instead of trying to lug them around. And I think those of us who are strong enough need to start training with swords.” “And we’ve got seven more circuses to wipe out,” Mitchell added with a sigh. “They had some kind of warning in Vegas. I’m starting to think it’s not a traitor in the compound but that the Hunters have eyes on us and maybe at the airport. I mean, think about it, they didn’t have

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enough warning to move their location or pack up, only call in some extra help.” “That makes sense,” Curtis replied thoughtfully. “Mitchell, get with Diets and Kale about the guns. I also want you to inquire about hiring some human mercenaries until we’re better trained. Clear that with Conley and update him with what Cass told him.” “On it,” he said as his team stood. “Sari, if you could work with Dr. Norton on getting the medical facility up and running as quickly as possible, that would be a great help. I also want you to order a boatload of that calcium stuff that helped Cass, just in case. We need to start preparing for the disasters instead of always scrambling to survive.” “The doc and I have been talking about some additions we’d like to include as well,” he replied and exchanged a look with the man in question. “And we need more knowledgeable staff. Dr. Frost is good, but he’s a little inexperienced and only knows vamps.” “Do whatever you both feel is needed, and I’ll approve the orders.” The doc made his exit then as the rest of us sat in silence. “I’ve got some ideas on how to try and stop the Hunters from finding out our every move,” Sari said after a few minutes. “They could be using a parabolic microphone to get some of the intel they have. Those things are able to be tracked.” “Do it,” Curtis replied, and more people left. “You’ve got a phone call to make in a few hours, Cass,” Ham reminded me. He’d talked with Sari about the Councilman our dad knew. “And you need to shift before then.” “Right, okay. So everyone has a purpose or is working on something then?” I asked as I stood, noticing my mates did as well. “Yes, but not what you’ve listed,” Shem answered quietly. “I’m working on an idea that I’d like to talk to you about privately tomorrow morning after I get some answers back today.” “Okaay,” I drawled at his vague statement. “We’ll meet after breakfast.”

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“I’ll ask Diets since it involves him,” he replied. I froze at the name because I knew Shem’s mate wasn’t happy with me. But Shem didn’t notice because he couldn’t see it, and I decided to let it go. I might not be Diets’s favorite person right then, but I trusted Shem and knew he’d never let Diets act out on his aggression toward me. We all went our separate ways then, and I headed for the back doors. Merrick and Logan followed behind me, and it made me feel a little uncomfortable. It was weird. For one, I wasn’t used to having anyone’s constant attention. Two, I knew they were making sure I didn’t keel over after almost dying. I tried my best to ignore them as I quickly undressed and shifted once we were outside. My cheetah stretched out, and a thrill went through me as it felt that we were okay and getting better. Then, after a few minutes of simply walking around, I shifted back. Once that was done and I was dressed, I walked back into the house in between my mates and headed to our room. I knew I needed to take the phone call in private but, until then, I did want some comfort from my mates and to find out how they were holding up with everything going on. There was just so much going on and so fast that I worried it would affect our already fragile and unstable mating. Though it could be maybe I just worried too much. But I wasn’t keeping quiet and waiting to find out. I’d kept quiet once too often and almost ruined my life. And who says you can’t teach an old kitty new tricks?

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Chapter 7 Later that day, I had a long talk with our father’s friend Councilman Jacobs. I filled him in on everything, and he was behind my plans so far and promised to think about it and see where he could help. He’d already been working with other Council members and the vampire Council on how best to evacuate the shifters that didn’t live in large groups. That was great and all, but I was focused on the most immediate issue. My phone rang seconds after I hung up, and I assumed he was calling me back. “Yes?” “Is this Cassiel Cowell?” a hesitant but familiar voice asked over the line. “Depends on who’s calling.” The hair on the back of my neck stood up. It was never a good sign when someone used my full name since that meant they didn’t know me well enough to simply call me Cass. “This is Aaron Rayner. We met with Logan in the dining room.” “Oh, hi,” I replied quickly as nerves started to eat at my stomach. Why was he calling me? “I guess that’s one way of putting it. I mean, I didn’t really get to meet you before my breakdown.” “From what I hear, it was long overdue,” he said and then swore. “I didn’t mean that the way it came out. I simply meant I understand why you had one from the little bits of information I got that day, and I assume there was lots more to the story.” “Probably.” We were quiet for several moments until I finally just decided to bite the bullet instead of this dancing around. “Why are you calling me, Aaron? Do you need to speak with Logan?”

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“No, no, I want to talk to you.” He sighed heavily into the phone. “I just thought I should explain why I left.” “Because you love Logan,” I whispered as my eyes started to burn. “I’m really sorry—” “You have nothing to be sorry for,” Aaron exclaimed, cutting me off. “And yes, I love Logan, but we were never really in love. It wasn’t like that.” “How was it like?” I felt a small flutter of hope that maybe one day Logan would fall for me if his heart wasn’t already taken. “We were best friends for decades, Cassiel. And at some point along the way we realized we were both so lonely. You’re lucky that you found your mates so young, because I can tell you that waiting for them sucks. Logan and I got tired of waiting and being alone, and we found each other attractive.” “So you decided just to be with each other?” “Yes. I love Logan, and we fit well together, but we always knew it wasn’t forever. We didn’t have that kind of chemistry or dire need for each other like mates do. But we were happy and not alone anymore.” “Why are you telling me all of this, Aaron?” “Because I know Logan won’t,” he answered and sighed again. “He’s about as expressive and good with his emotions as a dung beetle. And finding your mate when they’re in a relationship is hard enough without thinking they were in love with someone. I didn’t want you to give up on him because he didn’t tell you what we were to each other.” “Then why did you leave if you weren’t in love with him?” “I don’t mean to be condescending, but I’m not sure I can explain it to someone as young as you.” There was a pause, and I assumed he was gathering his thoughts, so I let him without interruption. “Think of how you love your brothers. You’ve know them for a long time, and certain things just come naturally.

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“When you see them you might hug or get each other’s jokes because you’re so familiar with each other. Logan and I have that after being friends and then lovers for so long. But also, after decades of being together, it’s just instinct now that when I walk into the room I give him a kiss. And I didn’t know how either of us could handle not having that anymore. I was worried he wouldn’t try to be happy with you if he saw me every day alone. Does that make sense?” “Yes, and you’re an amazing man, Aaron,” I answered honestly before realizing I’d done it. But he really was. I mean, who does such selfless acts like that? “I’m sorry you left your home and all though. That couldn’t have been easy on you.” “I think it’s easier than the alternative, Cassiel,” he whispered. “I want him to be happy, and I didn’t want to potentially ruin your mating, but seeing you three together every day would have been too hard. I do miss him. He was a big part of my life for a long time, and now I’m back to being lonely and missing my best friend. Being there every day and seeing you guys would be torture.” “I can see how that would suck huge, monkey nuts.” “That’s one graphic and gross way to put it.” Aaron chuckled, which was just what I’d been aiming for. “I do hope that one day when your mating is not so new, or even if I ever find my own mate, you’d be okay with Logan and I being friends. It’s not the intimacy I miss much. It’s my friend.” “Aaron, I’d never tell Logan who to be friends with,” I said gently. “If you want to be his friend, I’m not standing in the way. You’re getting the raw end of the stick here in many ways, and I don’t want to make anything harder on you.” “You’re going to make Logan very happy,” he replied, and I could almost feel the smile in his voice. “Not many people would be willing to do that, Cassiel, or care about the ex- lover.” “I’m not most people, and call me Cass. No one uses my full name or at least not my friends.” “Is that what we are? Are we friends?”

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“I’d like us to be when things aren’t so tense,” I answered slowly. It was the truth, but I wasn’t sure if tense was the right word to choose. “I know Curtis is your friend, too, and I can’t think your leaving was easy on him either.” “He was very upset about how I handled everything with the Hunters and when Logan was taken,” he admitted in a pained voice. “I betrayed him.” “You also found a way to warn him and get him a note,” I said immediately. “I was there when it all went down, and he never doubted you, Aaron. He was worried for you, not mad at you.” “Thank you for telling me that. It helps a lot actually to know that I’ve not lost both Logan and Curtis. I knew Curtis interceded on my behalf with Conley, which is why I’m not in jail. But we were friends, too, and I don’t want to lose that.” “I don’t blame you. I’ve only had one friend like how you describe Logan, and I lost him. It’s haunted me ever since.” “I caught part of that the day you met Logan. Merrick’s brother, right?” “Yeah, it’s complicated, and not everything was the way I thought it was. And then Logan and you, and now there are Followers on top of dealing with the Hunters,” I said, letting my voice trail off to indicate how tiring it all was. “I think I need a nervous breakdown just listening to all that,” Aaron replied with a snicker. “Logan’s a great partner, and he’ll never let you down. Just promise me one thing?” “I’ll try,” I answered and cringed at how lame that sounded. Aaron had moved, called me, and done everything he could to make my mating with Logan successful, and I answer with that? Yikes! “Take care of him? He deserves to be happy and loved. He’s not had the easiest life, and his family members are assholes. He needs more TLC than I could ever give him as his best friend turned lover. I’m glad you have so many brothers and support as his mate. He could use that.”

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“I’ll do my damndest to make him happy, Aaron. I can’t promise I won’t screw up since I’m just as new as you are to this whole mating thing. And sometimes I’m so busy being the older brother that I don’t do a great job of even taking care of myself. But I can promise you I have every intention of making this mating work.” “That’s all I needed to hear. Thank you, Cass.” “Thank you,” I said, not even being able to hide the shock of him having any reason to thank me. “And I appreciate the call. I can’t even begin to fathom how difficult it was for you to make it.” “Maybe it will help my Karma, so I can find my mate.” He chuckled, and I joined in. We talked a little bit more and then finally hung up. I felt much better about my situation with Logan after having talked with Aaron. I did also make a mental note to talk to Meri about what I’d learned. He had a right to know all of this as well. “How are you feeling?” one of the men in question, Logan, asked as he entered my room. “Better than I would have thought.” I snickered and then patted the bed for them to sit. They did, exchanging a look as they got comfortable. “I need to ask you guys something.” “You can talk to us about anything, Cass,” Meri said gently as they each took one of my hands in both of theirs. “I hope you really mean that,” I whispered and then took a deep breath. “I want to kiss you guys, but I wanted to know which of you I should kiss first. I mean, if I kiss Logan first, will you get upset and vice versa?” “You’re asking if we’ll think that you accept one of us and just tolerate the other based on who you choose to kiss first?” Meri asked with his eyebrows drawn together. “Basically,” I answered and stared at my lap. “Well, I think we can find a solution to this dilemma,” Logan said with a wink at Meri. “How?”

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“By both of us kissing you at the same time,” he answered as they leaned in from either side of me. One side of their mouths touched mine while the other touched each other. It was strange, and a little awkward, but exciting all the same… Everything one would expect for their first kiss. It wasn’t long enough. “What now?” I whispered when they moved a breath away. “Now we show you everything you’ve missed out on when you only fuck,” Meri replied gently. “Let us love on you, Cass.” I swallowed loudly and closed my eyes, ready to admit my worst fear. “What if I’m not any good at it? What if I’m broken inside and all I can do is fuck?” “I don’t believe that for a second, babe,” Logan answered firmly but calmly. “But if it turns out to be the case, then we’ll deal with it. I wholeheartedly think you’ve got more than enough love in you to give us, and all we need to do is show you how.” “Okay,” I said after a moment, leaning back as I opened my eyes so I could see them. The gorgeous smiles on their faces made my being uncomfortable completely worth it. “Tell me what to do.” “We’re going to show you, and this time all you have to do is enjoy,” Meri hissed in my ear as their hands moved to the bottom of my shirt. I nodded like a lust-filled bobble-head doll and lifted my arms over head. Logan pushed me back onto the bed and then covered my lips with his. I moaned, opening for him immediately. His tongue slid past my lips and moved across mine. Holy shit! I’d seriously been missing out. I melted into the bed as he explored every inch of my mouth as Meri licked and sucked along my neck. And their hands! Dear god, their hands were all over my body at once it seemed. “Does our baby like that?” he asked me as Logan made love to my mouth. I whimpered and went to move my arms so I could touch them, only to find they had trapped them with my shirt. I struggled for a moment, and then Logan swirled his tongue in a delectable way that

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had me wondering what it would feel like if he did that to my cock. “Relax, Cass, enjoy the ride.” “Yes, my mate,” I panted when we broke for much- needed air. “I’m all yours, both of yours.” “Do you really mean that?” Logan asked, his voice wavering with nerves. “Are you really ours now, baby? Do you know we’re not the enemy now?” “I never thought you were the enemy,” I answered and then leaned up to give him a quick kiss before doing the same to Meri. I shook my head as I thought of how to explain what I was feeling. “There were just so many strikes against us that I knew I was going to get trampled. I wouldn’t have survived that when I was so close to losing it already. I thought your heart was spoken for and Meri could never want me after what happened with Rolf.” “What changed your mind?” I stared into Logan’s eyes, wondering how best to answer that, and decided the truth was working for me right now, so I’d better stick with it. “Almost dying, for one. How you both worried and fawned over me when I woke up. You don’t do that for someone you are planning on not keeping. And surprisingly, Aaron.” “Care to explain that one?” he asked as his eyebrows shot up to his hairline. “Sure, if Meri stops touching me like that for a moment.” I chuckled. Our mate had been busy sucking up a few bruises on my neck and shoulder. “I can’t think when he does that.” “Fine, but you’ve got one minute to talk while we get naked, and then I’m back to what I was doing.” Meri playfully pouted as they hopped off the bed and got undressed faster than I ever thought possible. I took a moment to drink in the vast amounts of firm, tastylooking flesh before I needed to wipe up my drool. “You were supposed to be talking.” “Right yeah, Aaron,” I sputtered and then filled them in on my conversation. Originally I wasn’t going to tell Logan right away, but

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then I thought he should be able to confirm or deny what Aaron said before I acted on his words. Meri got me undressed as I talked, but Logan knelt down on the floor and sat on his feet. He watched me intently until I wanted to squirm under the scrutiny. Meri caught on, and once I was naked, he sat on the bed next to me with an arm around my shoulder. We stared at Logan for a few minutes after I was done, waiting for his response or waiting for something. “He’s right,” Logan finally whispered. “That’s how we got together, and we were never in love but were buying time together so we weren’t alone. It did make it hard to walk away from him knowing he would be lonely again. “I was going to explain all that before our first time together, but you were trying too hard to piss me off. I didn’t get that it was just a defense mechanism until you were already hurt, and then I thought I’d lose you before I could ever set things right. I’m sorry.” “I’m sorry, too,” I said gently and slid to the floor in front of him. “I was so angry that I was lashing out. I was angry that you were spoken for when we met, about Rolf, and at Meri for not finding me to tell me the truth sooner, and at myself. I was just angry at the world, and I took it out on you guys, assuming you wouldn’t want me.” “What do we do now?” I looked into his eyes and reached out to cradle his face in my hands. “Now we move forward and forget the mistakes we made. That’s what I’d like to do, if that’s okay?” “Yes, of course,” Logan said at the same time Meri answered, “Absolutely.” “Then I believe my mates were going to show me something,” I replied with a purr and waggled my eyebrows at him. Logan let out a loud laugh then swooped me up into his arms before depositing me on the bed next to Meri. “Well, that’s the eagerness that I wanted!”

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“How about this then?” Meri snickered and then swallowed my cock down fully. “Holy shit!” I gasped and almost vaulted off the bed, and would have, if it wasn’t for Logan’s hand on my chest. He leaned over, and his lips found that sensitive spot just below my ear I didn’t even know I had. I moaned like a slut and spread my legs wider so Meri had complete access to me. Then Logan started pinching my nipples, which I didn’t even know I liked, and I melted into the bed. “Come now,” Logan growled in my ear, and I did. Mother of mercy did I ever. I didn’t even have time to warn Meri or climb up to my orgasm. It was just suddenly there. I was enjoying the sensation overload and then, with two words, I was shooting my load down his throat so hard my balls hurt. “Good boy.” Meri pulled off my flagging cock with a loud pop. “Am I a good boy for pleasing him like that?” He smiled widely as he licked me clean like a Popsicle. “You’re both wonderful.” Logan chuckled and then whispered in my ear. “Kiss Meri now so you can taste your seed in his mouth.” “Okay,” I moaned and tried to sit up, but my body was a pile of lust- filled goo. I crooked a finger at him, and he crawled up the bed. He heard what Logan had said because he mashed his mouth down to mine, demanding entrance, which I gave. It was hot to taste myself on Meri knowing full well how it happened. While Meri was busy keeping the top half of me squirming with pleasure, Logan moved down my body. I heard the snap of a cap as Meri nibbled on my bottom lip. “Pull his legs up,” Logan said, his voice deep with lust. I didn’t know what he meant until Meri moved an arm under my knees and pushed them to my chest. Oh, right, me. I was the one that was about to be taken. Wow! There seriously wasn’t enough blood in my brain to think right then. And when Logan pushed a slicked-up finger inside of my ass, I was worried if there would be enough blood left in my body for my

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heart because it was all heading south of my belt line and fast. I pulled away from Meri’s mouth and cried out, rambling the most incoherent drabble. I had no clue what I was saying and was pretty sure it didn’t make a lick of sense. “Now, now, fuck me, now, fuck! Me!” I pleaded and begged when he pushed in a second finger, wiggling them around to stretch me out. “No fucking, only loving,” Meri whispered in my ear. “And I want to see how flexible our kitty is.” “What did you have in mind?” Logan asked and worked in a third finger. “You can lift him easily, right?” “Yeah, he only weighs like one fifty.” He chuckled. “Sit up against the headboard, your knees bent and legs spread with just enough room for him. Reverse cowboy while he sucks me off.” “Perfect,” Logan drawled and pulled his fingers out of me. They moved into position and placed me where they wanted me since I was still too limp to help them. I barely had time to blink before Logan was impaling me on his cock. I opened my mouth to cry out in pleasure but never got the chance to make a sound because Meri was waiting with his dick in hand. He fed it to me, and I greedily swallowed him down. My legs were out in front of me, and I was almost folded in half. When Logan moved me off of him, I took Meri down my throat and then pulled off of him when Logan yanked my hips down. It was fan-fucking- tastic, pun intended. I didn’t have to move myself or worry if I was messing anything up, and the pleasure I was giving my mates warmed my heart. It was kinky but loving at the same time. Meri ran his fingers through my hair as he whispered words of encouragement, while Logan placed soft kisses on my back.

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I felt special, treasured, and most importantly… wanted. They wanted me there, and no one else, even with all my flaws and issues. It was heaven on earth. “Coming,” Meri cried out seconds before his cock exploded in my mouth. I drank him down, moaning at the sweet but salty taste of him. Logan sank his teeth into my shoulder as I did and started thrusting up into me. I cried out around the cock in my mouth as my own shot ropes of cum all over my legs. Logan lifted his head and roared out his release, filling me up in a way I’d never felt before with the random sex I’d had. He wasn’t just giving me his pleasure or his seed but his very soul. And in that moment, I accepted his as I gave both of them my heart. Maybe it was too soon, and I wasn’t completely ready. But if I’d learned one thing, it was that we never knew how much time we had left on this earth, and I wasn’t going to waste a minute of that time being cautious anymore. Meri pulled out of my mouth and fell back onto the bed as he gasped for breath. Logan thrust into me one more time and grunted before leaning back against the headboard. And me? I slumped over my legs and passed out from the mind-blowing bliss. One moment I was riding the wave of my orgasm and the next everything went black as the waves swept me away.

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Chapter 8 The next morning I sat on a couch in one of the sitting rooms after breakfast. Diets and Shem were sitting across from me on another one, looking very, very nervous about something. That didn’t settle my own nerves about why they wanted this meeting. Personally, I would have loved to be anywhere else, namely back in bed with my mates. But then again, right about now, plucking out every one of my pubic hairs with tweezers was looking appealing. “I wanted to apologize for my behavior the night you came into our room—” “You were right, and I’m the one who should be asking your forgiveness,” I said quickly. It was the truth, and I meant it, but I wanted to cut this conversation off. I wasn’t very good dealing with people’s emotions—or my own for that matter. “Please, let me finish, Cass,” he replied gently. I sighed and nodded for him to go on. “What I said was horrible, and I have no excuse. I was troubled that Shem was hurt, and I was a little bit, too. You’ve had my back and been on my side no matter what from the moment I stepped into this house. You took time to explain things to me when I needed it and were patient when things seemed too much to handle. “So yeah, I was upset when I found out that you were dealing with this major issue and in pain. And I didn’t even fucking know what was going on, much less how to help you. So I lashed out because I was startled when you woke us up and cranky because I hadn’t slept

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much because Shem was distraught. But none of that excuses what I did.” “Well, thank you for that,” I said as I leaned forward and braced my arms on my knees, staring intently at my hands. “I hope you know that it wasn’t you, Diets. It wasn’t anyone’s fault that I didn’t tell you guys but my own. It’s not a reflection on anyone.” “It took me a bit to get that, but once I understood what you thought happened with Rolf versus the reality, I got it. I can’t even imagine what it was like for you or the hell you went through, so I’m not even going to try to tell you what you should have done or how you should have handled it. I just want to help.” “I’m doing—” I started to say but then stopped when he held up a hand. Fine, the quicker he got out what he had to say I could get out of here and this uncomfortable conversation. “I talked to Shem about some of the trauma counselors the Fire Department has for the fire fighters after they endure something major. Several years ago, I lost a really close friend of mine, Kale’s, too. It’s not the same as what you went through, but talking to the counselors really helped me.” “How did he die?” I asked in a small voice, not sure if I wanted the answer but needing to hear that someone went through something like I did and got help. “We were in a several-story building on the top floor, and the fire wasn’t so bad,” he answered, his voice starting to get shaky with emotion. “It seemed like a normal fire, a normal day. We didn’t know there was a private lab in the basement that wasn’t on the directory. Something down there blew and practically shattered the foundation and first floor. The structure of the building fell apart in a flash, and the ceilings collapsed. “I fell to the ground, but my friend Micah was sliding down one of the holes. I dove for him, and grabbed his hand before he fell. The structure was so bad that the middle of the building just seemed to open up, and it was a straight shot down to the inferno in the

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basement. I tried my damndest to hang onto him, but I took some scrap metal to the stomach and was nowhere near full strength. “He was screaming for me to not let him go, but our gloves were wet inside with sweat because of the intense heat. I remembered Kale and a bunch of our crew trying to make their way to us through the rubble.” He gasped for air, silent tears streaming down his cheeks. “I tried. I really did. I just couldn’t get another hold on him with my other hand with the metal in my side. And he slipped out of my grasp, and I watched him plummet to his death.” “I’m so sorry, Diets,” I whispered as tears of my own fell. Glancing at Shem, I saw he was crying, too, as he held onto Diets tightly, but had obviously heard the story before. “I know you did your best.” “Just like I know you did everything you could to get the gun away from Rolf and stop him that night,” he said gently. “It wasn’t your fault, Cass. Even if you had been his mate, it wasn’t your fault.” “It’s not—” “Yes, it is the same, Cass,” Diets said firmly as he wiped his eyes with the back of his hand. “You can’t control everything and everyone any more than I can. Rolf was sick, and you didn’t know, and not knowing that wasn’t your fault either. From what Merrick tells me, his parents and entire family were deep in denial because it’s so rare that shifters have any type of affliction like that.” I shook my head, not able to accept what he was saying and let go of my guilt just yet. “It took me six months of therapy to come to terms with that day and understanding that shit happens, and I wasn’t to blame. I think you took a huge step in letting yourself heal when you told everyone what happened that night. But I talked with Shem, and he agrees with me that you need to talk to someone, a professional.” “You think that would help?” I asked after a moment. “You’re not mad at us?” Shem replied hesitantly. “I was worried you’d get pissed and defensive that you needed to see someone.”

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I couldn’t help it. I let out a hard laugh as I shook my head. “I was ready to walk away from my family for a moment’s peace that I knew I could never get because my demons were in my head. I was thinking of finding a witch so I could talk to Rolf’s spirit and see if he could forgive me. I’ve been spending nights in the bottom of a bottle of alcohol because it was the only way to stop the nightmares. “I never doubted for a second I needed help. I just didn’t know where to get it. I can’t talk to human counselors because how would I explain mates and not let them on about shifters? Talking to you guys about it makes me also feel like a failure because I’m the oldest and you all look up to me. I’ve been living in hell between a rock and a hard place. I’m too worn out and broken to try and even deny I need help.” “We called Conley,” Diets said a few moments after my rant when I calmed down a bit. “I asked if there were any trauma counselors that he knows of that are shifters or vamps who would know about your world.” “Are there?” I whispered so quietly I barely heard myself. There was a slight glimmer of hope, and I was scared to believe in it. “He knows a few, and one has an opening in his schedule right now,” Shem answered with a bright smile. “If you give us the okay, and are on board, Conley will have him flown in so that he’ll be here next week.” “Thank you. Thank you so much,” I replied and then broke down. “I don’t know what to do or how to fix what’s broken in me. I actually kissed and made love with my mates last night, only to leave them when I woke up afterward, because I was too scared to be in our bed and sleep. They won’t put up with that very long and they’ll realize I’m not worth the drama.” “I don’t know about that,” Logan said from behind them. My head snapped up so fast I heard a pop in my neck. “I think you’re very much worth a few slight adjustments in sleeping arrangements and whatever else you need.”

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“I agree, babe,” Merrick added as they came into the room. “Sorry to intrude, but we felt your distress and got worried. We came in on the tail end and didn’t want to interrupt.” “You’re serious?” I asked, my eyes going wide. “Well, yeah, we didn’t want to impose—” Logan started to say with drawn eyebrows. “No, that I’m worth it. You really mean that?” “With all our hearts, Cass,” Merrick answered and rushed to me. He sat down next to me and threw his arms around me. “None of this was ever your fault, and what it did to you we would never hold against you. You’re our mate, and we all have our own shit that we come with. None of it is worth losing you, and we can be as patient as you need as long as you’re willing to try. And you showed us that last night.” “And you’ll get better,” Logan said as he sat down on the other side of me and hugged both of us. “You already agreed to get some help, but we want you to do it for yourself, not because you think we will leave you if you don’t.” “Yeah, I want it for me too,” I replied with a tired sigh. “I want my life back if that’s possible. I want to be the man I’ve been faking I am all this time and be happy.” “We don’t make you happy?” Meri asked, pain evident in his tone. “You make me not want to give up, nevertheless our mating is too new for me to just flip a switch and now I’m happy. I’m happy that I found you guys and that you’re in my life. But until I am able to stop being afraid to go to sleep because of the nightmares or feeling like I’m broken, I’m not going to be truly happy.” “Okay, that makes sense,” he whispered and kissed my forehead. I had a feeling that he said it but didn’t really feel the words right then. But I couldn’t change how he felt any more than my own feelings. Sometimes I wish I had a damn magic wand that I could just wave

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and all our troubles would disappear. But since this was the real world…not so much. “Call Conley and tell him to please send the shrink,” I said with a smile and a teasing tone. I had a feeling this was going to be anything but fun and lots of hard work. Anything worth having wasn’t easy, though, and I wanted my sanity back. **** We met up with everyone else who was in the larger conference room talking strategy about going after the Hunters. As bad as I knew it sounded, this was exactly what I needed to take my mind off of the emotionally draining conversation I’d just had with my baby brother and his mate. I was good at this part of my life—planning and seeing things outside the box others couldn’t. “Everything go okay?” Curtis asked me when we all went to sit down. I appreciated him not spilling what had just happened though it was obvious he’d known. It was kind of him and, honestly, I never expected anything less from the man. “Yeah, we’re good,” I answered with a nod for them to continue where they were. Mitchell raised an eyebrow but didn’t ask any questions or leave me as the focus of the room. Another good man that I was honored to call my friend. “We’re going to hit here,” he said and pointed to a blown-up map of Frankfort, Kentucky. “On the southwest side right after sunset. We don’t want to go in during the day, but when we hit the Vegas circus, we found some of them were armed with night vision equipment. While we can still see better than humans with that stuff, we want the advantage, and if it’s dusk, then they can’t use it.” “Did you figure out where the high ground will be for us?” Kale asked as he gestured to himself and Diets.

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“Yes, we got satellite pictures of the area and found an old barn about a hundred feet away from the west entrance. That should give you enough elevation to be helpful when we infiltrate.” “Oh yeah.” Diets chuckled as he rubbed his hands together in glee. “We’ll be picking them off like flies.” “Gross.” Shem snickered. “Unlike the clusterfuck last time, I’d like to have some order in how we do this. A lot more people got shot than needed to be,” Mitchell said firmly but not harshly. “But it’s understandable given there were so many more Hunters than we originally thought would be there.” “I got people shot?” Shem gasped, his face paling so quickly that I thought he might faint. I shot Mitchell a dirty look, but he wasn’t focused on me right then. In two seconds he had Shem going from lightening the mood to panic stricken that he’d gotten someone hurt. “No, that’s not what I’m saying at all, Shem,” Mitchell answered gently as he held out his hands in surrender. “What you and your brothers did probably saved a lot of us.” Glad he realized that. “However, when you changed the plan, not everyone adapted well, and several groups got split up.” Well, fuck, that wouldn’t ease Shem’s mind any. “So you’re saying it wasn’t us but the fact the group was underprepared for what we were going to face?” Ham asked, and I wanted to hug him because the frown on Shem’s face was gone. “Yes, exactly,” Mitchell said with a relieved sigh that someone understood. “My team has trained together for this type of situation, but others there didn’t. I want to avoid another clusterfuck.” “How does the plan change then?” I asked, wanting the conversation to move forward instead of people picking on what Mitchell was saying to death. “I want the cheetahs’ plan implemented in the strategy of how to take this circus down. Diets and Kale will help pick off guards in the front where we will enter, and when the fighting starts, I want you

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guys to enter from the back. The Hunters will be focused on us, and that should give you a window to disable as many as possible so we can go in and finish them off while one team is releasing captives.” It made sense, and I felt pride that they took our involvement seriously and my brothers were considered such an asset. We finalized several more details, and then the meeting broke up. I went to shift outside to help my healing some more. Once I was back in human form, I sought out Dr. Norton and got a clean bill of health. He wasn’t thrilled I was jumping right back into the fight with the Hunters, but he didn’t have any reason to stop me since I could fight. I met up with my mates for dinner, and then we did something so normal that I almost laughed at the idea. We watched a movie. That was it. We relaxed, snuggled together, and watched the latest Harry Potter as our entertainment for the night. That didn’t mean we didn’t go back to our room afterward and fuck like rabbits because we did. But it was the gesture that meant the world to me. I’d never dated much in college, and even some semblance of a date was great. When the sex was over, my eyes started to burn as I left our room to go sleep with my litter mates. As I shifted and lay down on the floor with Raz and Ragu, they reminded me about the counselor Conley was sending and that things would get better. I hoped they were right, because it might have been better for my nightmares and sanity that I not risk waking up with Merrick and think he was Rolf again. But not sleeping in the same bed as my mates broke my fucking heart in a way words could never describe.

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Chapter 9 The next day had been very solemn and did not have the hyped-up feeling like when we were about to take down the Vegas circus. I wasn’t sure why though, which was the kicker. It could have been that we’d been lucky not to lose anyone on our side since there had ended up being so many more Hunters. Or maybe people were just worried about what tricks could be up their sleeves this time. Either way, the hours leading up to the flight were dreadful. The time on the plane was almost painfully depressing. Personally, with the vibe everyone was giving off, I felt like I was about to face a firing squad rather than rescue paranormals from captivity. We were armed to the teeth, and this time we had not only Mitchell and his team, but three more teams from Conley. Curtis had also talked to the local coven in Frankfort, and they were sending some of their people for support. They were going to be in charge of getting cages open and people to safety. So we were better prepared and less optimistic. What was wrong with that picture? The sun had just set beyond the horizon, and there was just a shimmer of light to illuminate the land. Diets and Kale had already broken off to get into their positions while everyone else did the same. We had one of the two-way radios strapped around my neck, so while we couldn’t talk in cheetah form to the other teams, we could hear what was going on. “I smell death,” I said in the shared link with my litter- mates. “Something’s not right here.”

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“I agree, and now I’m glad that Luca’s last captive brother isn’t here,” Raz replied. When we’d landed at the airport, Luca looked distraught, and Ham had told us that Luca didn’t feel the last missing litter- mate close by. We had all been disappointed at the time, but now, with the creepy vibe I was getting… I wasn’t saddened anymore. “I’m feeling really antsy and anxious that no one is talking to us or each other over the radio. We should have heard something or been given the green light by now.” Again, I agreed with my brother, though this time it was Rash. “Should one of us shift back and ask what’s going on?” “Not just yet. I don’t feel any distress coming from Logan or Merrick,” I answered. “And if Shem was feeling something from Curtis or Diets, he wouldn’t be sitting there patiently.” We turned as a group to look at our youngest brother. Shem was a cutie as a man, always seeming so innocent and fun- loving. But as a cheetah he was stunning. He was the smallest of all of us, which meant he was in cat form as well. His fur was sleek and shiny while still helping to make him look deadly. His tail flickered back and forth in agitation and impatience as he watched our entry point. He was pacing, but then again, most of us were. It would have almost been amusing if the situation wasn’t so serious. But I could only imagine what ten pacing cheetahs looked like in a confined area. Merrick and Luca were off to the side in shifted from as well. Luca in his animal, the jaguar, and my mate chose to go in as a lion. I took it as a good sign of how alike we were when he admitted that he generally shifted into some type of large cat. Logan and I had laughed when he then followed up with saying he also liked really small animals like frogs or ferrets because it gave him such a different perspective on the world. To each his own!

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I was glad that Merrick was comfortable enough to share that side of him even when he knew that it might make us laugh or tease him. It also showed me that I wasn’t the only one trying to open up for the sake of our mating. Logan had tried earlier today to talk about how he was feeling about raiding a circus since the last time he’d been at one, he had been one of the captives. He still had nightmares, he admitted, which we knew since we slept in the same bed sometimes. And he had common signs of post traumatic stress. It would take him a while to come to terms with all of that. But at least he tried. Merrick and I had gotten about twenty minutes of opening up before Logan had reached his limit and suddenly had something else we needed to talk about. Okay, fine, he had something to show us, and it involved removing his pants. But we let him get away with distracting us with sex. He couldn’t just flip a switch and suddenly be one of the gals on The View who shared everything. Hell, I wouldn’t want him to be. “Everyone turn back and head to the rendezvous point,” Diets said into the radio and snapped me out of my thoughts. “Curtis, call me on my cell.” “What the fuck is going on?” Raz asked as Shem immediately ran over to our piles of clothes and shifted back. I didn’t know what to answer, but we all followed our little brother’s lead. “What’s going on, Diets?” Shem said after he fumbled with the phone and found the right Braille number for his mate’s speed dial. We all crowded around him so we could hear as we got dressed. “Everyone’s dead, my angel,” Diets answered in a broken up voice. “Hunters and the captives are all dead, slaughtered. I’ve never seen anything like it in all my life. None of you need to see any of this.” “That’s why we smelled death,” he whispered, and then something triggered in my mind. I yanked back off the jeans I’d just put on and changed back into cheetah form.

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“Cass, wait!” Raz called after me, but I was in a fog of panic as I sprinted away from them and into the circus. I got about ten feet from the first body and skidded to a halt before turning so I didn’t have to see it anymore and threw up. It wasn’t just death I was smelling. It was that sick, acidic blood that was so familiar to me. “Breathe, Cass,” Rash said gently as he ran his hands over my fur. “Yeah, I figured it out, too.” My mates must have smelled my distress because they came racing toward me. One from where I’d just been and the other through the carnage. I shifted back and practically leapt into Logan’s arms. “They were killed by Followers,” I gasped and shook as he held me tight. “I’d remember their stench anywhere.” “Shit, this is bad,” Merrick said after he shifted back to human form. “Why would the Followers come here and kill Hunters and the paranormals they held? What was the goal in that?” “To stop us from rescuing them?” Raz guessed, and I had no idea this time on anyone’s motives. “But why? What would be the benefit of doing this? And they left the mess for us to find.” “I said everyone go to the rendezvous point,” Diets growled as everyone else joined us. “Doesn’t anyone fucking listen?” “Cass recognized the scent of Followers and needed to get closer to confirm,” Merrick said firmly in a “don’t fuck with me” tone I didn’t know he had. “Shit,” Curtis hissed and reached out to hug Shem. “This is bad.” “Yeah, that’s what I just said,” Merrick snorted. “I didn’t think it could get worse than finding out that everyone was dead, but well, it did.” “What do we do now?” Mitchell asked, and I turned my head in Logan’s arms to stare at him. What did he mean? Did he expect us to just walk away? “We can’t touch the bodies if they have Followers blood on them. We’d all get burned.” Oh, my bad. That was a really good point. I shouldn’t have been so quick to think the worst of Mitchell.

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“We need to go break up the other circuses now!” Luca wailed and dropped to his knees. Fuck! We’d all been so caught up in what was going on here that we’d forgotten one of us had family still with the Hunters. “I’m happy he’s not here. How horrible am I for being grateful in the middle of so much death?” “You’re not horrible at all, baby,” Kale said quickly as he and Ham went to their mate and comforted him in a group hug. “We’re grateful he’s not here, too.” “We’ll find him, Luca,” Ham whispered gently and kissed his mate’s temple. He looked up at me with pleading eyes as if saying, “move the conversation elsewhere.” He was right. I gestured everyone to follow me deeper into the circus after sliding down out of Logan’s arms. “We don’t shift back into human form if we die in animal form,” I said after we moved far enough away. “It’s one of the reasons Hunters do this to us. They used to simply want our hides like we were animals but with the added sick knowledge that we were shifters. I think we need to take as many pictures as we can in case some were in human form and can be identified by any Council. Then we need to burn this place to the ground. But I have no idea how to hide this from the authorities.” “Let me talk with the head of the local coven and get his take on it. Maybe he’s got an in with the Frankfort police,” Curtis replied as he whipped out his cell phone and started dialing. He walked away from us to make his call while we all stood there in shock. Then Diets pulled out his phone, saying he was going to call Conley and update him. “I wonder if the coven can handle all of us crashing with them tonight?” Mitchell asked absently as he looked around. We couldn’t help it, no matter how much we didn’t want to see what was in front of us. It was like a car wreck that someone knew would be bad but just couldn’t stop themselves from looking.

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But I also knew I had a whole mountain of reasons for more nightmares now. And I needed more motives for them like I needed a frigging hole in the head. But life was far from simple and oftentimes was messy, so like everything else, I would figure out a way to deal. “We burn, and then the coven is going to bury any remains at a remote location,” Curtis informed us as he rejoined us. “The head of the coven is tight with the Chief of Police who knows about us. He said they would handle everything else if we just set the fire. “The story’s going to go out that the owners of this circus burned it to the ground in an attempt to hide any evidence of their crimes after some were arrested for illegally capturing rare and endangered species without any sort of license. They’re also going to set up a hotline for people to report any suspicious circuses or shows with rare animals. That might help us get a jump on exact locations instead of general areas. “Also the story will say the people who ran this place are dangerous and still at large. The head of the coven knows a shifter who’s a reporter for a national syndicate, so this story will go all over.” “I updated Conley, and he wants us to head to the closest circus tomorrow instead of going back. We can’t risk the Followers and whomever their master is beating us to the next circus.” Diets looked nauseous, and if I had to guess, I’d say he was experiencing one of the side effects from being mated to a shifter. Once humans mated with us, they could move faster, heal quicker, smell better… and right then I’m sure he didn’t want a heightened sense of smell. “Okay, Mitchell, you guys torch the place and meet us back at the local coven’s compound. They’ve got more than enough room for us, and I don’t want us at a hotel when Followers might still be in the area. Meet us there when it’s done, and we’ll debrief and form a plan of attack for the next location in the morning.” Everyone nodded sadly, feeling defeated, and then moved to their assigned tasks. Kale was carrying Luca, who had passed out after

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working himself up into a panic. Ham led the way back to the vehicles with tears running down his cheeks. I couldn’t even imagine what Luca was going through. Part of me would die inside if I had to search for one of my brothers in the hands of Hunters. But now, adding the fact that Followers were somehow involved and killing the circus… yeah, I wasn’t sure there were even words for that kind of pain, worry, and fear. It took about half an hour for everyone but Mitchell’s team to get loaded up and to the local coven’s estate. They were as somber as we felt, but very polite and welcoming under the circumstances. Logan, Meri, and I took turns in the shower that was attached to our guest room, never saying a word to each other. When we were all done, I snuggled up against Logan with Meri at my back. We simply lay there in quiet for a while, lost in our own thoughts. “You guys okay?” Logan asked, breaking the silence, and I jumped in surprise since no one had spoken for so long. “In shock I think,” Meri answered and then kissed my shoulder. “I’m not sure anyone could be okay after seeing something like that.” “Yeah, and I just keep wondering what it means,” I said with a sigh. “It just seems so random for two problems we were facing to suddenly be tied together. Why? And who’s doing this?” “We’ll figure it out, but we need to let it go for tonight.” I tilted my neck so I could look up at him. “How do you let something like that go?” “I’ve been alive longer than both of you combined, babe,” Logan answered, his tone serious but tender. “We’ll fight the good fight tomorrow and however long it takes until the Hunters and Followers are gone. But you can’t let it consume you, or life will stop being worth living. If you don’t remember to take time for the good, you will only live the bad.”

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“I just can’t seem to find any good right now, Logan,” Meri said quietly, and I nodded in agreement. “This, right here, is the good, my mates,” he replied and leaned over to kiss each one of us briefly. “We’re still alive, and we’re lying here together, loving and comforting each other. That sounds like a whole lot of good to me. Don’t you think?” “Yeah, that makes sense,” Meri sighed and reached over with one arm to lock his hand with Logan’s. “I’m glad you’re older and wiser, because I think I’d get swept away in the pain and sadness if you weren’t here to keep us reeled in. I’m not saying that you don’t feel it, too, but I’m glad you can compartmentalize like this.” “You learn how to or you go nuts.” “So what do we do now?” I asked quietly after a few moments of thoughtful silence. “We comfort each other, love each other, and hold on tightly to what matters most. I don’t know about you guys, but I need to feel you both, and I think us making love would help me remember what we’re fighting for. Then Cass goes and crashes with his litter and tomorrow we get ready for battle.” “No, I’m sleeping here tonight,” I said with a sigh. “I saw too much tonight that I’m sure will be in my dreams to worry about my past demons. I want to stay here with you guys and take in your strength.” “If that’s what you want,” he whispered and then rolled in my arms so we were facing each other. “And what about making love? Is that okay?” “I think it’s perfect, because I need to feel you both, too,” I said with a purr, trying to lighten the mood. He smiled brightly at me as Meri let go of Logan’s hand and ran his fingers along my hip and thigh. I leaned in and claimed Logan’s lips. Now that I’d started kissing them and was feeling comfortable with it, I didn’t ever want to stop! He let me take the lead, and I explored every inch of his mouth slowly

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and thoroughly. Meri reached in between our bodies and started stroking Logan’s cock against mine in one hand. I moaned and stopped going slow, switching to attacking and devouring Logan’s sweet, plump lips. “Stop,” I gasped, breaking the kiss after several minutes. “I’m going to come!” “We can’t have that just yet.” Meri chuckled and licked along the edge of my neck. “But then again maybe you need to have more than one orgasm tonight.” “Okay,” I squeaked out, shocked I could make that noise. Meri rolled me onto my back as Logan reached over the side of the bed for the lube. Then they both moved in between my spread legs in a flash. I watched and panted with lust as Logan slicked up his fingers before passing the lube to Meri. “I want to take you while you’re in Cass,” he explained when Meri gave him a questioning look. “I think it’s time we’re all connected together making love.” “Yes please,” Meri moaned and poured lube in his hand. I whimpered like a slut for attention, and they gave it to me. Logan pushed a finger inside of me while Meri reached behind his back and got himself ready. Then with his free hand, our big vamp held my hard cock at the base and they started licking me like a lollipop. “Sweet Jesus,” I gasped, my body on sensation overload. Meri used his other hand to massage my sac, and I had to reach overhead and grab the headboard to brace myself so that I didn’t thrash around in pleasure. “Don’t stop. Please, whatever you do, don’t stop!” “Never, babe.” Logan chuckled, and I felt the vibrations shoot down my cock in blissful torture. He nibbled my dick from the head to the base as Meri dipped his tongue in the slit, and that was it. I was done for. “Love you both,” I screamed as I shot my load. I rode out my orgasm as Logan shoved another finger into me and stroked my sweet spot. That sent me into another tailspin climax before the first one

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even ebbed. I had no clue men could have multiple orgasms! It felt like heaven, and I never wanted to come back down, but eventually I did. “Did you mean that?” Logan asked hesitantly as they both stared up the length of my body at me while I gasped for air. I tried to talk but couldn’t yet, so I settled for nodding my head. “Are you sure, Cass? I mean, it’s really soon.” “Never mind,” I whispered and started to pull away from them as my eyes burned with tears. Logan’s fingers slipped out from me, and they didn’t move. I crawled out of bed and practically dove for my clothes from the night before to cover my nakedness. My heart was shattering. It was one thing that they weren’t ready to say it back to me, but it was a whole other can of worms that they didn’t believe me. “Don’t go,” Meri begged as he leapt off the bed and grabbed my wrist. I tried to pull away, but he wrapped both of his arms around my shoulders from behind. “I love you, too, Cass. I’m sorry, I was just shocked.” “Why? Because I’m too broken to love?” I asked bitterly and struggled against him. I was just as strong as he was even though he had a few inches on me, but unless I was willing to hurt him to get away, I wasn’t going anywhere. Logan moved in a flash and was pushing his body against mine so I was trapped. “No, and don’t ever say that again!” He growled and took my head in his hands. “We know you can love, and we see it every day with your brothers. But we weren’t sure you were ready to let us in like that. You’ve done a really big one-eighty in a short amount of time, Cass. It’s not fair to be mad at us for being surprised.” “Okay, I can understand that,” I replied and closed my eyes with a sigh. “I almost died. And when I thought I was going to and didn’t have the chance to say what I was really feeling about finding you guys, I swore to myself that I wouldn’t ever do that again. That I would tell you how I felt no matter how scared I was.

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“After tonight, all the horror we saw, all I could think about was coming here and being with my mates. All I wanted was you guys, and I realized then that I loved you both. And okay, that wasn’t really how I planned to tell you. It just kinda came out. But it is how I feel.” “I love you, too, babe,” he said gently and kissed me. Then he raised his head and looked over my shoulder at Meri. “And I love you, too, my mate.” “Me, too,” Meri whispered and kissed him. I knew it was a tender moment, but I got excited watching them kiss. I was only a man after all. “Now where were we? Oh yes, we were going to both make love to Cass and join together as only mates can.” I swear I almost passed out at the idea of both of them inside me at the same time, even though I knew that’s not what Meri meant. They both caught one of my arms in time as my knees went weak. “You okay?” Logan asked with worry in his voice. He took the clothes from my hand and dropped them to the floor as they guided me to lie back on the bed. “I just got a visual of me riding you while Meri was behind me and inside me at the same time you are,” I answered as my cheeks heated up with embarrassment. “I seemed to like the idea enough that my body went slack.” “You’d let us take you together?” Meri’s eyebrows shot to his hairline in shock as he moved between my legs again. “Most people aren’t on board with that. I’m not sure I would ever do it.” “I’d want to try it one night, but not tonight,” I said quickly, because I wanted loving, not fucking. “I might hate it and never want to do it again, but we’re mates. And that means we’re able to explore any and every avenue with each other.” “I very much like how adventurous you are,” Logan purred as he moved behind Meri and got into position. I met his glance over our mate’s shoulder and shivered at the intense lust in his eyes directed at me. Seems I wasn’t the only one who liked the idea!

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I didn’t get a chance to answer, because it seemed Meri’s need for us to be connected was even stronger than mine. He lifted my legs up on his forearms and thrust into me firmly but not roughly. I threw back my head and cried out at the sudden invasion, even though it felt magnificent. Logan entered him seconds later, and I felt it in the way Meri pushed in farther. The three of us moved together as one team, one unit. They gave everything they had, and I did the same, and not just with our bodies. I felt them inside of me, heart and soul, from the simple touches, looks, and gestures as we made love. It started slowly and gently but progressed to more as our resolve shattered, and we couldn’t hold back our needs any longer. And then we fell into bliss like dominoes, starting with me. When we were all spent, they collapsed on top of me with loud sounds of sweat-slicked skin slapping together. “Sorry, babe,” Meri mumbled as they started to move. “Didn’t mean to smash you.” “No, stay,” I said quickly and used my arms and legs to keep them where they were. Logan first then Meri tilted their necks so they could look at me, and I saw the questions swimming in their eyes. “This is where you both belong, here with me, all of us connected. This is right. And I know you’ll have to move eventually, but give me just a bit to enjoy this.” “Whatever you need, my love,” Logan said with a warm smile that Meri mirrored. I knew from the bottom of my heart that they both meant it in every sense of the words. And my heart that I’d long since thought was beyond repair started to heal from old wounds and soared with new love.

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Joyee Flynn

THE END WWW.JOYEEFLYNN.COM

ABOUT THE AUTHOR Joyee Flynn grew up in Chicago, living in the same house all her life until she left for college. Though she has a great life, she loves to get lost in fantasy that only books can bring. Her wide interest in reading is reflected in her writings. Currently, Joyee lives with her dog, Marius, named after a vampire from Ann Rice’s Interview with the Vampire series. She dreams of one day living out in Montana, with enough land to have a few horses, and finding a couple of cowboys of her own. A lover of men, Joyee’s all about them in any form in her books. Vampire, werewolf, military, doesn’t matter at all as long as they are hot, hard, and sex fiends!

Also by Joyee Flynn Ménage Amour ManLove: North American Dragon 1: Dragon Mine Ménage Amour ManLove: North American Dragon 2: Dragon Ours Ménage Amour ManLove: North American Dragon 3: Their Dragon Siren Classic ManLove: Marius Brothers 1: Micah Siren Classic ManLove: Marius Brothers 2: Remus Siren Classic ManLove: Marius Brothers 3: Stefan Siren Classic ManLove: Marius Brothers 4: Victor Ménage Amour ManLove: The O’Hagan Way 1: A Dillon Sandwich Ménage Amour ManLove: The O’Hagan Way 2: A Caleb Footlong Ménage Amour ManLove: Purrfect Mates 1: Here Kitty, Kitty Ménage Amour ManLove: Purrfect Mates 2: My Little Kitty Ménage Amour ManLove: Purrfect Mates 3: Our Sexy Tiger Ménage Amour ManLove: Purrfect Mates 4: My Angel Cheetah Ménage Amour ManLove: Purrfect Mates 5: Kitty in the Middle Siren Classic ManLove: Hiding Hounds 1: Sheriff Found Siren Classic ManLove: Hiding Hounds 2: Vet Found Ménage Amour ManLove: Resistant Omegas 1: Tristan Ménage Amour ManLove: Resistant Omegas 2: Carson Siren Classic ManLove: Sons of Thanatus 1: My Maven, My Everything Siren Classic ManLove: Sons of Thanatus 2: Higher Rank Siren Classic ManLove: Beyond the Marius Brothers 1: Isaac Dragos Siren Classic ManLove: Midnight Matings: Squeak and A Roar Siren Classic ManLove: Midnight Matings: Two Fangs and a Hoof Siren Classic ManLove: Midnight Matings: Spells and Bananas

Also by Stormy Glenn and Joyee Flynn Ménage Amour: Delta Wolf 1: Chameleon Wolf Ménage Amour: Delta Wolf 2: Mating Games Ménage Amour: Delta Wolf 3: Blood Lust

Available at BOOKSTRAND.COM

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