The Awakening by Rynne Raines
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons living or dead, business establishments, events, or locales, is entirely coincidental. The Awakening COPYRIGHT © 2007 by Rynne Raines All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission of the author or The Wild Rose Press except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles or reviews. Contact Information:
[email protected] Cover Art by Angela Anderson The Wild Rose Press PO Box 706 Adams Basin, NY 14410-0706 Visit us at www.thewildrosepress.com Publishing History Scarlet Rose Edition, June, 2007 Published in the United States of America
Dedication A special thanks to everyone who believes dreams do come true, and to Andrew, the man who never let me give up on mine.
What people are saying about Rynne Raines… In my years as a professional writer/editor, I have seen many new writers emerge, and also some extremely interesting books. I found THE AWAKENING to be not just well written but an enjoyable, interesting read, that was difficult to put down. When it ended, I wanted more!! ~ Charleen Micheles/EDITOR THE AWAKENING is a story I would read over and over. I’d recommend it to anyone who enjoys love stories that capture all the five senses. It’s the kind of fantasy you can’t run from once you’ve read the first page. ~ Tanya Snow—Author of GHOST OF MY PAST
Alexander’s hands were like velvet cuffs binding Natalie’s wrists above her head. Gripping a fistful of her auburn curls, he imprisoned her beneath his weight. With the heat in his eyes nearly melting her, she writhed beneath him in false protest. “Tell me what you desire, Natalie,” he said, his warm breath caressing her cheek. Her head whipped from side to side as she tried to fight the intolerable urges his lust-filled teasing brought forth within her. Nearly breathless, she stared back at him. “You, I desire you.” Only he had the power to relieve her anguish, her mental and physical torment. Triumph flickered in his gaze and a wicked smile plagued his lips. “As you wish, my lady,” he said in that sultry, deep voice that made her heartbeat quicken. Fiercely he ravished her mouth while easing a knee steadily forward, parting her bare thighs. His cool slacks brushed her searing flesh, causing her to shiver with delight. Needing more than ever for him to satisfy her, she surrendered and let him venture further until he touched the tender ache between her open, defenseless legs. Gasping, Natalie shot straight up in her bed and gripped her chest where her heart pounded in quick, violent pulses. Her eyes flickered back and forth as she scanned her bedroom. Empty. Tears welled in her eyes. She covered her face with her hands and took a shuddering breath. The intensity of these dreams was out of control and the pain she felt waking alone each morning was becoming unbearable. Surely, the vividness of the dreams and the resulting lonely ache would soon drive her insane. There had to be someone—anyone—who could explain what her dreams meant. **** 1
Rynne Raines The walls of the psychiatrist’s office were dull, like a flavorless cream, but covered with numerous certificates stating Dr. Burnadak’s credentials and featured several awards for papers he had published on dream analysis. Natalie Kendrick spotted a thick tan book on the large oak desk. Her fingers trembled. She brushed the hardcover and perused the title, What Your Dreams Are Trying to Tell You by Dr. James Burnadak. She blew at her wispy bangs and moved back to the window. The busy bustle of New York City was endless. From the thirteenth floor, the view reminded her of ants scurrying from place to place with their only focus being to serve their queen. Catching a faint glimpse of her disheveled reflection in the window, she smoothed out the wrinkles in her white blouse and black skirt. She looked unkempt, like a woman who had spent an entire night in the arms of her lover. But her lover was an imaginary man; only a dream. Warming at the remembrance, Natalie fidgeted with the collar of her blouse. “Natalie?” Her head snapped toward the man standing in the doorway, a clipboard in his hand. He was younger than she thought he would be, middle-aged with chestnut brown hair and kind hazel eyes. “Yes, I’m Natalie. Thank you for taking time to see me, Dr. Burnadak.” “Please call me James. Dr. Burnadak makes me feel old.” He gestured towards a chair by the desk. “Please, sit.” She forced a brief smile and arranged herself in the chair. His eyes seemed to analyze her every movement, as if she were a rat in a maze. “So, what can I do for you, Natalie?” “As I explained on the phone, I’ve been having these dreams, about a man.” Burnadak’s brow creased. “Is this man someone you know?” She contemplated the question and took a breath. “Well, sort of. It’s a long story. See, when I was eightyears-old, my parents died in a fire.” “I’m very sorry to hear that.” She offered an appreciative smile and pushed on. 2
The Awakening “That night I was crouched in the corner of my bedroom, on the second floor. I was trapped—there was no way out.” His head tilted to one side, interest now edged into his features. “Go on, my dear.” “I remember my eyes were burning from the smoke and the heat of the blaze when I saw something materialize in front of me. Not something—someone, a man. I remember thinking he was dressed funny. As I got older I discovered his clothes were similar to garments worn in the nineteenth century.” Natalie glanced up. Dr. Burnadak leaned back in his chair and tapped his pen against his crooked chin. “Very interesting, and then what happened?” “Well, I was scared at first but then the man leaned down and told me not to be frightened, his name was Alexander and he was going to help me. The last thing I remember was being swept up into his arms.” Burnadak hunched forward, resting his forearms on the desk. “So you believe a man materialized in your room, saved your life, and then vanished?” Her back stiffened. “Actually, I’m not sure what to believe. For the last three years I’ve had dreams about...Alexander.” “You mean dreams about the night of the fire?” Natalie froze. No, not about the fire, although her dreams held that same heat. Finally, she shook her head. “Well, if not about the fire, then what?” She bit the inside of her cheek and readjusted herself in the chair. How was she to explain she was having erotic dreams about an imaginary man to a stranger who was already looking at her as if she had two heads? “Did you have a dream last night?” Pressing her dry lips together, she nodded. “Well, why don’t you start there?” She steered her gaze towards the window, a few minutes passing before she found the courage to speak. “In my dreams, he’s standing by my bedroom door, watching me.” “How do you feel when you see him watching you?” She touched her hand to her throat. “Warm inside, like his gaze is burning into me, stronger than anything 3
Rynne Raines I’ve ever experienced before. When I see him I feel drawn, compelled to be near him.” “Then you’re attracted to him?” She nodded without thinking. “It’s more than an attraction though, that’s what frightens me.” She flashed a brief uneasy smile then focused back on the window. “How does Alexander act in these dreams?” “He starts out a complete gentleman, but…” The tender flesh between her thighs began to throb and in minutes, she was once again lost in the fantasy. “Something primal takes over, and there’s a beast raging inside him set on claiming me. He backs me to the wall, dragging his hands the length of my body until he’s on his knees. He pushes up my skirt and his mouth is so hot when his tongue touches me, like flames searing my flesh. I’m gripping fistfuls of his ebony hair, arching against him, begging for release, and then...” “Natalie!” Hearing her name, Natalie’s eyes blinked open to see Burnadak standing over her, shaking her by her shoulder. “I think I get the picture.” He went back behind his desk. He loosened his tie while she swallowed a lump in her throat. “I’m so sorry.” “No problem, happens all the time.” He waved a dismissive hand. “It’s obvious you have strong emotions towards this…individual.” “I’m in love with him.” His mouth opened and closed several times before any sound came out and she shifted her gaze, silently cursing for revealing such intimacy. “Natalie, trauma is one of the leading causes of hallucinations. In my opinion, you believe this man saved your life. Therefore, you feel indebted to him on some level. By becoming intimate with him in your dreams, you’re showing him your gratitude. It’s very simple.” She stared at Dr. Burnadak now, tears threatening to erupt at any second. “It’s not simple,” she shouted. “Do you know the last date I had was two years ago? Brad was an accountant with the firm I work at and he was wonderful, but I had to break it off because being with him made me physically ill; like I was being punished for my unfaithful behavior. Now when I wake up and 4
The Awakening Alexander’s not there, I feel half of me is missing. It’s overwhelming pain. The real problem, doctor, is all I want to do is sleep.” He studied her and scratched his head with the pen. “Have you considered medication? There are some drugs that suppress dreams.” Cut Alexander out of her life? No, she had never considered that. Suppressing her dreams would eliminate one of the truly happy times in her life. But maybe if she had no dreams, made a clean break, perhaps she wouldn’t feel bitter, frustrated and alone each morning after realizing he wasn’t really there. Burnadak reached into his breast pocket, snatched out a pad of paper and started to write. “This is enough medication for three months, if you want to go this route.” She took the prescription and nodded. “You don’t think I’m crazy, do you?” He shook his head, gently smiling, and walked her to the door. “No, but if you want any chance at a normal life, I’m afraid Alexander is going to have to go.” **** The sky was swirling black and the wind had picked up by the time Natalie got out of the drugstore and back to the apartment. White paper bag in hand, she dragged her feet up three flights of stairs, stopping in front of her suite. For a moment, she hesitated. She didn’t want to go inside. Entering would mean having to make a decision on whether or not she would remove Alexander from her life. At the thought, a sharp pain doubled her over. She braced a hand against the door and winced at the fierce knot tightening in her stomach. Pawing for the key, she staggered inside. Clutching her side, she dropped the medication on the kitchen table. It’s very simple, the doctor had said. If it was so damn simple, why did her stomach feel like a razor sliced into it? A warm soak with a generous dumping of apricotscented bubble bath cured everything, Natalie thought after half an hour of relaxing in the tub. The strange pain had eased. After rinsing off the soothing bubbles, she 5
Rynne Raines grabbed a towel off the rack and gave herself a quick dry before reaching for her terrycloth robe. She then twisted her long hair up into a loose knot. Entering the kitchen, she spotted the little white bag on the table. A voice in her head warned not to go near it but she scolded herself for acting like a teenager who just finished watching a horror film. She tore the paper and fished out the small bottle. The vicious ache clawed at her stomach once again, and the bottle slipped from her damp fingers. The idea of losing Alexander tied her in knots. But she couldn’t allow it to go on any longer. Like the doctor said, if she wanted any chance at a normal life, Alexander would have to go. She had no choice. Grasping the bottle, she headed for bed, noting the lightning storm that had erupted outside. After sliding off her robe, she slipped beneath emerald green sheets and stared at the ceiling. Silent, she lay there, listening to rain pelt the thin glass windowpane above her head. It was amazing how the clear blue sky could become a thundering pit of darkness in so few hours. She yawned. Mother Nature had moods of her own and wanted the world to experience them in full force. Another glowing bolt flashed. The bottle on the nightstand stared at her. Summoning strength, she snatched it up and shook out a tiny pill. Laying back, a glass of water in hand, she eyed the small tablet with contempt. “I’m afraid that won’t assuage your agony.” Natalie gasped. A tingle shot down her spine as the velvet rich tone stroked her from across the room. She struggled to sit up and searched the shadows. “Alexander?” she whispered. He stood by the door, moonlight illuminating his face. Even from a distance, she could see his midnight features, strong and sinuous, strikingly handsome. Untouched by age, he looked the same as the first time they had met fifteen years ago. She clutched the sheet tighter to conceal her naked breasts and the effect his nearness was having on them. “I—I’m dreaming again?” A tender smile formed on his full passionate lips. He shook his head. “No, angel, this isn’t a dream.” 6
The Awakening Reason warned this was another illusion, a vivid replication of their encounter last night, but she could not look away. “You’ve been suffering, I know. I couldn’t bring myself to watch it any longer.” Her heart sank at the strain in his voice. This man wasn’t like the one who tormented her with ruthless pleasure every night in her dreams. His dark eyes flickered with the same burning intensity that made her heart falter. But now, an unfamiliar sadness clouded them. “You’re not real.” A muscle worked in Alexander’s jaw and his gaze narrowed, searing into hers. “Aren’t I?” Natalie struggled to keep her expression neutral. “No, you aren’t. I’ve come to realize that ordinary men don’t pass through walls and appear out of thin air.” “I’m far from ordinary, angel.” His mouth twisted into a sinful grin, setting her blood on fire. She would have cursed him for being so arrogant if her voice hadn’t caught in her throat. Of course, he wasn’t ordinary. She’d assumed that much after their first encounter. “You’re not…” she hesitated. “Human? Not exactly, I’m afraid. Immortal would be a better word.” Her veins filled with ice and the sheet scrunched between her toes. “Va—vampire?” “You’ve no need to fear me. I’m not that kind of immortal.” A light grin tugged at the corners of his mouth. “However, I have vampire blood in my veins, but so do you. It’s what saved your life and why you’re in agony now.” She flinched. “I don’t understand and I’m not sure why you’ve come but—” He held up a hand. “Allow me to explain.” He paced, taking long elegant strides with his hands linked behind his back. “The night of the fire, smoke inhalation caused irreversible damage to your lungs. You were going to die unless I intervened. Although I’ve never interfered in a mortal’s fate, your shrill cry awakened something in me I’d thought to be long lost. I walked the earth for centuries lacking any emotion, but after finding you I felt reborn—for what reason I don’t know.” 7
Rynne Raines Natalie followed him with her eyes while he moved back and forth like a lion stalking his prey, his possessive gaze never leaving her. “I needed you to live so that I could again truly live. In turn, I transferred some of my blood to you—enough to repair the fatal damage—but there were consequences to my actions that I disregarded at the time.” “What consequences?” He took a breath. “Your emotional draw toward me derives from a bond created during the blood transfer. The pain you experience at the thought of removing me from your life occurs because subconsciously your brain is telling you that you’ve not yet repaid a debt which is owed.” She stared at him, confused. “And what payment is required of me?” He didn’t answer immediately. “True male vampires exchange blood with a mortal woman when they seek to bond her to them. Unfortunately, I overlooked that small detail.” He was telling her she wasn’t in love with him, that her emotions weren’t her own. “Why the dreams?” she asked. “I created them. If your subconscious believed you’d fulfilled your debt to me, your life would once again become your own.” A dark eyebrow lifted. “But dreams weren’t enough to stop your pain. You need more.” She froze. “You don’t mean...” He stepped towards her, unbuttoning the cuffs of his freshly pressed shirt. “What do you think you’re going to do?” “Seduce you.” Grinning, he undid two more buttons and drew the shirt over his head. She shuddered, unable to avert her gaze from his naked torso, the corded muscle throughout his shoulders, his taut stomach. He sat beside her an arm’s length away. “Your lips are beautiful, soft and inviting. I’ve fantasized about kissing them, you know.” His warm whisper caressed her face and a whirlwind of emotion stormed through her, heightening her senses. She wanted to faint when he finally touched her. His hand lifted to cradle her cheek and the pad of his 8
The Awakening strong thumb drew over her lips. With one finger, he shattered every inhibition that demanded restraint and left her no other choice but to surrender to him. He lowered his lips to hers, commencing his seduction with absolute tenderness. His kiss was, as she had imagined, a slow, powerful aphrodisiac. With every talented stroke of his tongue, she softened, losing herself in the sumptuous taste of him. Her body reacted shamelessly to his practiced touch as it would have to her imaginary lover’s—but this wasn’t her imagination. This was a flesh-and-blood man. The man she had loved and waited for all her life. His lips trailed lower, across the tender line of her jaw and the curve of her throat. At the same time, his hands moved up to cover hers. “Let me see you, angel, all of you.” Unable to deny him, she loosened her grip and let him draw down the sheet. The fabric pooled around her waist. Her nipples tightened like chocolate drops, hard, aching with anticipation. She waited for him to make his move, do something that would stop the butterflies dancing in her stomach. Sucking in a sharp breath, his gaze drifted over her. “Your body is exquisite.” She wanted to scream when he began to nibble her, taking one of the taut buds in his hot mouth, encircling it with his tongue, grazing it with his teeth. She was shaking, vibrating, clutching wildly at his shoulders. Biting down on her lip she tried to hold back, but a cry of pleasure escaped. “Easy,” he murmured. He lifted his head and returned to her mouth. His kiss was more demanding and intense than before, a savage assault on her senses. He ripped away the sheet and trailed a hand up her thigh, pushing her legs apart as before. She gasped and went rigid when his warm palm covered her quivering flesh. His clever fingers began stroking, coaxing, urging her wild abandonment further until she strained against his hand. “Steady, my sweet Natalie.” Probing her moist opening with complete skill, he slipped one finger inside. Lost in the tantalizing rhythm, she clawed at his 9
Rynne Raines shoulders, begging for release. He withdrew, then slid in a second finger, stretching and filling her while circling the pad of his thumb against the slick bud of her desire. A vicious pressure built. Fire enveloped her. On the verge of climax, her eyes opened. She saw a muscle flexed in his jaw. His restraint, too, was diminishing. “Come here,” she begged. “I need you inside me.” At her desperate plea, he gently eased his fingers back, then rose from the bed to shed his remaining clothing. Transfixed, her eyes followed the shape of his long, lean silhouette cast in moonlight. He parted her legs with his own, holding her down with his powerful hips. The blaze in his eyes warned that the raw primal man she dreamt of each night was taking over, but she was past the point of wanting his tenderness. Though the thought made her feel wicked, she wanted him to fuck her, and he knew it. He eased forward, slowly sheathing himself in her silken warmth. She reached for his hips to draw him deeper, desperate to feel the full extent of his rigid cock filling her, but he caught her wrists and pinned them above her head. Helpless and at his mercy, she reveled in a new fever bursting under her skin. He started rocking, grinding against her. Natalie curled her fingers into fists and instinctively lifted her hips to match his forceful rhythm. With each stroke, her muscles tightened around him, increasing the friction. In all her life, nothing had ever felt as good as this man did inside her. He covered her mouth with his, stifling her scream as he slammed against her in a final thrust. Arching his head back, Alexander released a harsh groan, then collapsed onto her sated body. They remained entwined in each other’s limbs, silent and motionless, the only sound ragged breathing and pounding hearts. Alexander regained the use of his limbs before she did and moved to her side, drawing the sheets over them. Natalie’s eyes fluttered open to the sensation of featherlight kisses trailing over her forehead. She had never felt so complete or wanted. “Is the pain gone?” he asked. Natalie looked lovingly up at him. “Yes.” 10
The Awakening The brief smile he offered was forced and his eyes clouded with grief, perhaps even more so than before. She turned over to face him. “Thank you for telling me the truth.” “I merely told you what you were owed. I wanted only to save your life the way you saved mine, not to indebt you to me or cause you pain.” His jaw set and gaze lowered, he slid his arm out from behind her head. Pulling away, he stood and gathered his clothes off the floor. Natalie watched Alexander dress. His every movement was graceful, from the way he slid one leg after another into his slacks to how he buttoned his shirt. When he straightened and raked a hand roughly through his ebony hair, a sigh eased past her lips. When he returned to the bed, his smile was sincere this time, although pained. He cradled her face in his hands and pressed his head against hers. “You’re a very special woman, Natalie Kendrick. Pray one day you might forgive me for any pain I’ve caused by interfering in your life.” He took the liberty of brushing a light kiss across her lips, then stood and turned his back to her. “Wait,” she panicked. “Just wait...that pain, it’s back.” His blue eyes narrowed. “That’s not possible. I was sure—” She grabbed his wrist, cutting him off. “I love you. I truly love you.” “You don’t know what you’re saying. It must not have worked.” “I do know what I’m saying. Fine, I lied about the pain, but I feel it,” she tapped her chest, “here, inside. I know my own mind, my own emotions. The dreams you created weren’t always just sexual, Alexander. There were countless times when we spoke to each other. You told me you felt alone in this world and only I filled the hollow void in your heart. You told me you admire my frank way of speaking, the way I cut my food in tiny pieces and take over an hour to eat a simple meal because to you it shows I savor life. You said you loved me. Was everything a lie?” He studied her a long time, searching her face. He swallowed hard before answering. “No. I never lied to you. I’ve loved you all my life.” 11
Rynne Raines Heart bursting with joy, she wanted to break into tears but held herself composed. Pressing her quivering lips together, her head slanted, she said, “I suppose the only question left is…” He folded his arms over his chest and stared down at her through the strands of silk that hung over his eyes. “Will you be able to make up for the anguish you’ve caused?” A minute that seemed an eternity passed before a low rumbling laugh sounded and he shook his head, smiling. “I can’t be certain, but if you would permit it, I swear to spend the rest of my eternal life trying to.”
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A word about the author… Rynne was born and raised in Edmonton Alberta, Canada, where she resided up until a year ago. Now living in Wetaskiwin Alberta, she’s grown fond of the slower pace lifestyle and has more time to focus on her one true love, writing romance. A year ago she started to pursue a writing career seriously and has been plugging away ever since. When she’s not walking her headstrong cocker spaniel or in a tub full of bubbles devouring another steamy romance novel, she’s handcuffed to her key board. Always looking for new ways to fine tune her craft, she is involved with LongRidge Writers Group and is a member with StoryCrafters. Both places are occupied by wonderful writers, many of whom have a special place reserved in her heart.
