Holly's Intuition

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Holly’s Intuition ISBN # 978-0-85715-477-4 ©Copyright Saskia Walker 2011 Cover Art by Posh Gosh ©Copyright March 2011 Edited by Claire Siemaszkiewicz Total-E-Bound Publishing This is a work of fiction. All characters, places and events are from the author’s imagination and should not be confused with fact. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, events or places is purely coincidental. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced in any material form, whether by printing, photocopying, scanning or otherwise without the written permission of the publisher, Total-E-Bound Publishing. Applications should be addressed in the first instance, in writing, to Total-E-Bound Publishing. Unauthorised or restricted acts in relation to this publication may result in civil proceedings and/or criminal prosecution. The author and illustrator have asserted their respective rights under the Copyright Designs and Patents Acts 1988 (as amended) to be identified as the author of this book and illustrator of the artwork. Published in 2011 by Total-E-Bound Publishing, Think Tank,

Ruston Way , Lincoln, LN6 7FL, United Kingdom .

Warning: This book contains sexually explicit content which is only suitable for mature readers. This story has been rated Total-e-burning.

Erogenous Zones HOLLY’S INTUITION Saskia Walker

Dedication

For my editor, Claire Siemaszkiewicz, who has encouraged me throughout the writing of this series, and who teaches me new things whenever we work together.

Thank you!

Trademarks Acknowledgement The author acknowledges the trademarked status and trademark owners of the following wordmark mentioned in this work of fiction: iPod: Apple

Chapter One

They walked down the corridor—two lovers about to be united as one—but before they reached the bedroom door Stewart latched his hand over Joshua’s shoulder and stopped him, as if he was unable to wait a moment longer. Backing his lover up against the wall, Stewart kissed him. It was open-mouthed and demanding, and brought about a rush of visceral, raw need—the kind of need that Stewart always inspired. Stewart, the more dominant man of the two, ran his hands over his lover’s body, rapidly stimulating him. When Stewart embraced Joshua’s cock through his jeans, desire surged between them and their bodies rocked together in unison. Joshua moaned into his lover’s mouth, his lust gathering like a tropical storm. “Why is this happening to me?” Holly Evans threw back her quilt and sat on the edge of her bed, plucking at her pyjamas restlessly as she attempted to resist the intense barrage of intimate psychic information she received. She stared across the darkened room in the direction of their flat. Several walls separated her and the two men who lived next door, yet even in the darkness she had a vital connection with Joshua’s experiences. Joshua and Stewart were her neighbours, and over the past couple of weeks they’d also become her most intimate companions in an erotic psychic experience that she could not understand nor stop. It meant that when Joshua and Stewart were together she could feel every stimulation, every physical interaction and subsequent lusty fulfilment. Psychic since childhood, Holly Evans had never experienced anything this vivid and intense before. Her gift had previously been about sensing moods and forthcoming events, and instinctively knowing someone’s character when she met them. Never before had she had this kind of deep connection with anyone. Recently though, she had felt Joshua’s highs and lows of emotion, his pain, pleasure and desire. That meant that when he was with his lover it was like an X-rated movie rolling in her head, and more, for she experienced each touch, act and sensation that Joshua felt, as it happened. Every nerve ending in her body was stimulated, and yet she felt horribly guilty for having this window into their private moments. It was wrong, it was intrusive, but she couldn’t stop it. To make matters worse, she couldn’t help herself—she’d quickly discovered that she wanted to see, know and feel it all. Like a secret voyeur who was aroused but could not turn away, because the two men making love was the hottest thing Holly Evans had ever known. Together they looked right, and it startled her, because she hadn’t even realised they were lovers before her bond with Joshua developed. When Joshua had moved in with Stewart, she’d assumed they were flatmates. After her psychic connection with Joshua began all that changed, and with it came Holly’s initiation into the delicious experience of man-on-man sex. Gorgeous men they were too. Joshua was tall and lean, with the ultra-fit body of a fanatical cyclist. Stewart was a gym manager, and his body was large, muscular and hard. Both of them were beautiful, and the experience of them intertwined this way made Holly’s arousal levels soar, her body wired by every incoming stimulus and tingling with anticipation. Her core ached to be filled and her clit throbbed as she felt every touch, saw every action. At that moment Stewart had his hands underneath Joshua’s T-shirt and was roughly caressing his chest. The touch of the larger man’s fingers on his nipples made Joshua’s balls shift higher, his arousal growing acute. When Stewart lifted his T-shirt by the hem and pulled it off, manhandling him, Joshua thrilled at his touch. It made him widen his stance for balance, his spine straightening as he offered himself to the other man’s scrutiny. Stewart ran one large hand around the back of Joshua’s neck, making Josh’s body keen under his touch. That hand moved on, down his breastbone and over his flat abs, until it met the buckle on Josh’s belt. Stewart toyed with the buckle, tugging on it, until Josh groaned with apparent longing and rested his head back against the wall. As Stewart grasped the bulge of his erection through Josh’s jeans, he bent to kiss Joshua’s mouth. Need shot through Joshua’s veins, making him arch and reach. Holly clasped her hands over her eyes but it didn’t help, because it was inside her head and running along her every nerve ending. No matter what she did she could still see it all, she could still feel it all. The stimulation made her whole body prickle with arousal, her groin heavy with longing and her pussy hot and damp. The images and sensations she experienced were going directly into her mind and body. Why? Why had this happened? She stood up and walked to the window, opening the curtains in an effort to fill her mind with something else. Staring down at the midnight streetlights and the row of shops on the opposite side of the London suburban street, she tried to focus on that instead. It didn’t work. Without even trying to feel it, she knew that Stewart had turned his lover to face the wall. He’d taken off his own shirt and moved closer. The wall of Stewart’s chest against his skin made Joshua press back, his shoulders rolling as they made contact, two bodies moving together in rhythm. Joshua had his hands flat to the surface, his face turned to one side. Holly felt the need welling in Joshua. They’d been apart, and Joshua had missed being owned by his lover, missed being filled and forced to come even when he resisted. His hips arched as Stewart reached around and undid his belt, shoving Joshua’s jeans and jockey shorts down his thighs to gain access. Massaging his erect cock in one hand, Stewart stroked his lover’s bared buttocks with the other. It was too much. Holly turned away from the window and threw herself on to her bed face down, moaning into her pillow, her hand inside her pyjama bottoms. She had to find her own relief. With her fingers thrust between her thighs, she squeezed her pussy in her hand, panting when the stimulated flesh prickled wildly in response, her nerve endings sending a whole host of dizzying charges through her nether region. Passionately aroused as she was, she needed to come. Her clit was swollen and sensitive, her folds coated in her juices. Abandoning herself to base need her hips moved, thrusting against her fingers. In the flat next door, Stewart still had Josh up against the wall as if doing a full body search. Josh revelled in the way it made him feel both vulnerable and desired, and all of that poured into Holly. His lover dominated him wholly, stroking Joshua’s cock from behind while he pressed against Joshua’s back. He whispered low against Joshua’s ear, urging him on, his hungry kisses on Joshua's neck making him shudder. Going to come soon. The thought was Joshua’s, but it whispered around Holly’s mind and she rubbed herself faster. It had aroused her so much that she came quickly, rubbing herself and thrusting two fingers inside. The connection was so intense that when his state of extreme pleasure washed over her it doubled her own experience, taking her to new levels of sexual ecstasy. All the while the men cleaved together—two lovers who were deeply in love —two lovers who had no idea that the woman next door had become a secret, psychic part of their relationship.

Chapter Two

Stewart grabbed his backpack, threw it over his shoulder and downed the remains of his breakfast smoothie before leaving the kitchen. He walked the length of the hallway as quietly as possible and was about to head out of the front door when Joshua emerged from the bedroom, yawning. Stewart paused to admire his lover. He was lacking in self-consciousness, barely awake as he was, and completely naked. His cock was at halfmast and it made Stewart want to touch him. There was nothing quite as good as making Joshua come. There was that little bit of resistance in Josh that tripped something in Stewart. Even when his expression begged Stewart to show him how good it could be, Stewart could see it. It made it all the more satisfying when Joshua finally let rip and gave himself over to his more primitive urges. “I didn’t wake you, did I?” Stewart asked. Joshua still needed as much rest as he could get, recovering from an injury as he was. “No, I’m just about to get in the shower. I was trying to catch you before you left.” Joshua scrubbed at his closely shaved black hair. “I’ve been meaning to ask you, have you seen Holly recently?” Stewart shook his head. “I was thinking we should invite her over to dinner. I want to thank her for what she did for me after that loon knocked me off my bike, but I haven’t seen much of her since I got home from the hospital. We used to chat every morning, but now that I have to get the Tube to work I’m leaving earlier and I haven’t coincided with her. If you see her will you ask her over?” Stewart nodded. “Sure, I’ll call on her when I get back from my shift.” He winked. “Always happy to invite an attractive woman over for dinner.” Joshua lifted an eyebrow. “What? You haven’t noticed the way she looks?” Stewart grinned. Holly Evans was understated for a woman in her mid twenties, but she had a subtle vibrancy Stewart admired. Intelligent, curious eyes, or something, he couldn’t quite pinpoint it. Aside from that her waist-length dark-blonde hair and tall, curvy figure gave her a statuesque look that had caught his attention the moment she’d moved into the flat next door to his. Sweet-natured she was too. “Of course I’ve noticed,” Joshua replied, “but that’s not why I’m inviting her over.” “No, you wouldn’t want to spend too long looking at her, not with you being gay now and all.” Tension gathered in Joshua’s expression and Stewart knew he shouldn’t have teased him before he’d had a chance to wake up properly. Some days he couldn’t tease him about his sexuality at all, but Stewart was trying to edge Joshua towards an easier understanding of it, and that was no easy job since Josh had only admitted his attraction to men six months earlier. “Is Saturday good for you?” he added, in a relaxed tone, moving the conversation on. “Friday would be better,” Joshua responded. “Saturday I have to visit my parents. They’re having some sort of a family get-together after the rehearsal for my sister’s wedding.” His expression brightened, as if he was waking up. “Hey, if we have Holly over on Friday it’ll give me a chance to spoil someone who really appreciates a good meal.” Stewart gave him a fake punch in the shoulder. “You’re a good cook, but your tastes are too rich for me.” He slapped his belly, all hard muscle from his hours in the gym. “Protein,” he added in a demanding tone. “Carbs,” his cyclist lover responded, cheekily. It was a familiar point of contention. However, it was good to see Joshua feeling social again. He loved to cook for people, but in the days since his accident he’d been a bit withdrawn. This was a good sign, and having Holly over for dinner would be fun. Before Stewart left he closed the gap between them and kissed Joshua full on the mouth, cupping the back of his head in one hand. Joshua responded, his hands on Stewart’s hips making Stewart wish he didn’t have to open up at the gym that morning. He was getting hard, and a morning session would be appreciated. Time was against them, though. “You’d better hit the shower, and fast,” he said huskily as they drew apart, glancing down at his lover’s naked body, “or neither of us will get to work on time.” “Later,” Joshua said with a laugh, and nodded at the door. “I’ll hold you to that.” “Good.” Joshua stroked his erection provocatively, with humour in his eyes. “Tease.” Stewart sighed and headed for the door. “I’ll take care of that invitation,” he added, “leave it with me.”

**** Holly took a sip of her vanilla latte and sighed. It was a difficult task, trying to explain to her two sisters what was going on with her at the moment. It was so different to anything she had ever experienced before that she had reluctantly turned to her support network. The three of them had gathered at their fortnightly lunchtime meeting spot, Luigi’s Italian coffee house, to confer about Holly’s recent psychic experiences. Holly was doing her best to voice them, but it was proving both embarrassing and challenging. Aside from that, it was unusual for her to be the one who had problems because of her psychic ability. Holly’s problems had paled in significance, but now here she was, and she was desperate for advice. Faye, the youngest of the Evans sisters, often got herself into sticky situations because of her gung-ho attitude to life. Monica, the eldest Evans sister, was ultra-sensitive, and she was the one who had experienced the most traumas throughout her life. Usually Holly was the stoic one, the one who kept the others in check. Not this time. Faye spoke up. “Okay, explain exactly what went on when this psychic connection with your neighbour started and we’ll see if we can figure out why it happened.” “I’ve tried to make sense of it,” Holly responded. “Honestly, I have.” Monica interrupted. “You’ve tried on your own. Let’s put our heads together. Go through it slowly and try to recall the details. Take your time.” Holly gave a weak smile. They were trying to help, but now that she’d got started, Holly wondered how they could. Short of moving to the other side of London she couldn’t see a way to break the connection that had formed with her neighbour. Would moving away even make any difference, though? Thoughts tumbled through her mind as she tried to understand her unusual predicament. Her two sisters had defined psychic skills. Monica, who experienced psychic memories that were attached to the objects she touched, had mastered her skill thoroughly. Faye, who could communicate with spirits of the deceased, was less bothered by her gift. Holly’s own psychic powers had—until then—been less definable. It was more about hunches, about knowing what people were like and knowing when something good or bad was about to happen. Her hunches always turned out to be correct, but there had never been anything so direct, so visually and sensually real, about her psychic gift. Not until this thing had developed with Joshua. “As I mentioned last time we met up, Joshua was in an accident. We tend to leave home around the same time in the morning. I’m usually on my way to the Tube, and he’s cycling into the city, and we usually chat for a few minutes before we both leave the building and head in different directions.” “Cycling in the city?” Faye commented. “Yikes.” “Yes, but Joshua is like a pro, he’s a total cycle fanatic and he’s really lean and fit.” She paused when her thoughts drifted. Heat rose in her cheeks.

She was still astonished at how rapidly images of his naked body popped into her mind. Hurrying on, she recounted the details of that fateful day. “The morning of the accident he pulled out and this taxi shot out of nowhere and knocked him off his bike. I saw it all as I walked down the steps at the front of the flats. By the time I got over there, his jaw was bleeding and it was pretty obvious he had other injuries. Turned out to be a broken rib, a cracked collarbone and a minor concussion.” “Ouch, I heard broken collarbones are particularly painful.” Faye pushed her half-eaten toasted pannini away. Faye didn’t like any kind of pain and claimed empathising with it made her feel physically sick. “Go on,” Monica said. Monica was the most focussed of the three of them—no matter what her psychic ability put her through, and it put her through a lot. “Well, as you know I had my first-aid training at work last year and luckily it kicked in. I made him keep still in case he had a neck injury and I kept talking to him, basically trying to keep him conscious until we got help. The taxi driver called an ambulance and when it arrived, the medics asked me to come along with them. There wasn’t anyone else around. His flatmate had already gone to work. Stewart runs a gym and he leaves really early in the mornings.” An image of Stewart from the night before flashed into her mind, and again she had to push it away to focus on the discussion. “I stayed with Joshua at the hospital until he’d been moved to a ward. Then his mother got there. Stewart arrived shortly afterwards. I filled them in before I left. While I was alone with him I felt deep concern, but afterwards it was as if I was feeling Joshua’s pain. As I walked away, it built up.” She shivered slightly at the memory. “I felt both the pain, and the gratitude to see his loved ones. I figured at the time I was just empathising deeply. I like the guy and he feels like a friend…” More than that now, she reflected. “But when I left the room, when his family arrived, it was as if it intensified. The emotions that he felt when he regained consciousness and saw his loved ones were inside me, as if a deep connection had been formed.” She planted her hand on her chest and pressed hard, wishing she could make it go away by forcing it out. “I know his emotions, and I feel as if I’m experiencing them, even though I’ve got no control over it.” Faye’s eyebrows drew together. “Fascinating. This rings a bell with me, you know. Something about being responsible for a person if you saved their life.” “I didn’t save his life,” Holly clarified “His injuries were never fatal, although I didn’t know that at the time.” “There’s got to be a reason for it.” Faye pulled her phone from her bag and started entering data. “As if you’re going to find out the answer on the Internet,” Holly said with a dismissive laugh. “You’re just obsessed with analysing everything.” Faye flicked back her cherry-dyed bob and pouted. “I’m just inquisitive, and it’s amazing the stuff you can find out on the net.” Holly looked at Monica, her older, more sensible sister, for more tangible reassurance. It struck her how much she was going to miss Monica when she went away. In just a few days Monica would start the first leg of an exciting business trip around the world. It was a positive thing for their older sister, whose life had always been kept on a narrow path because of her psychic gift. Recently that had all changed. She was building a relationship with two bisexual men who willingly accommodated her psychic aspect and the problems it caused her, and she was going to be travelling with them in her work. Monica was sorted. But how would Holly and Faye cope without her? “Does the intensity of the connection change when you’re farther away from him?” Monica asked. Holly focussed on the issue at hand and shook her head, her lips pursing for a moment as she thought about it. “It doesn’t seem to, but I haven’t really tested that out by travelling.” She sat back in her seat, and opened herself to him. His state of being unfurled in her chest, and she drew a deep breath. “Right now he’s studying figures, because he’s grappling with a complicated report he’s concerned about writing. It’s not a strong feeling, because it’s something he’s in control of. That’s the only thing I’ve been able to make sense of, that I feel the connection most strongly when his experience is high emotion, physical pain, or… stimulation.” She forced herself to meet her sister’s gaze. Monica’s eyebrows lifted. Holly nodded, slowly. She’d hoped Monica would understand that, and she did. “Believe me, after the first couple of nights of intense connection, after he got back from hospital, I was ready to move to the Outer Hebrides.” “It’s like you’re living his life too.” Monica frowned. “Not constantly, but yes.” Once again she sighed loudly. “I’ve given it a lot of thought and I think I should move. I’ve been rattling around in that flat anyway, since Caroline moved out to be with her fiancé. I thought I’d be okay but I’m struggling with the rent. However, I’m not altogether convinced that being farther away from Joshua will help.” Monica nodded. “If you think it’s the right thing to do you can move into my place. I’m at Owen’s house most nights at the moment, and I decided against subletting it while I’m away, so you’re welcome to use it.” Relief washed over Holly. “Thanks, Sis. I don’t know what we’re going to do without you when you go off on your travels.” “It’s only for a few months, a year tops, and you can call me any time.” Concern flitted through Monica’s eyes, but Holly knew she deserved her promotion and the travelling that lay ahead. “I might have to take you up on that. I would still have to give a month’s notice on the flat but it would be good to have a bolt hole, somewhere that would enable me to put some distance between us.” The three of us, she thought, wryly. Being attuned with Joshua’s experiences meant that she was practically living with him and Stewart. Part of her felt that shouldn’t be a problem. Who wouldn’t want that kind of sexy input from a gorgeous man? But there was no ‘off’ button, and the guilty feeling that accompanied her experiences was a horrible thing to live with. “Why don’t you come over to my place on Sunday and see if that helps ease the psychic connection?” Holly experienced conflicting responses to the suggestion. The idea appealed to her, and it would be an interesting experiment. She was desperate to get a break from the stimuli, but she was also experiencing a deep fascination with it and making a total break would be hard. She suspected it would be more tempting as time went on—there was only so much X-rated sex and emotion a woman could experience second-hand without going insane, surely? She mustered a smile. “I might do that.” Monica stroked her chin between thumb and forefinger thoughtfully. “Maybe it’ll fade, with time. The longer after the accident the lesser the connection will be. You know, as he gets better and you are less concerned about him. It might have been triggered by your concern at the time of the accident.” “I hope so, because this kind of deep connection could send me to lala land. I’m getting incredibly intimate details from his love life and everything.” Monica looked at her questioningly. Holly nodded and rolled her eyes. “Didn’t you say he lived with another bloke?” Monica asked. “Uh-huh.” “Are they lovers?” Holly nodded again, relieved that her older sister had put it into words. She didn’t think she could say it aloud. Meanwhile Faye was waving her free hand at them while scrolling through data with the other. “I think I’ve found something.” She stared at the screen, her eyes flitting as she scanned the information. “Yes, I knew it. If you save someone’s life you become responsible for it. It’s an ancient Zen Buddhist belief.” Perplexed, Holly stared across at her. Faye looked as if she thought she had it all sorted out now. The irony was too much for Holly. “And does it explain why I, Holly Evans, have been ascribed an ancient eastern right of responsibility regarding another person’s life?”

Faye gave her a disparaging glance. “I’ve bookmarked the page for you. Maybe later you’ll feel like studying it in detail.” Switching off her phone she tucked it into her bag and folded her arms loosely across her chest, thwarted. “Tell us,” Monica said, drawing Holly’s attention back, “have you mentioned it to Joshua, or discussed it with either him or his partner?” “No way! Can you imagine bringing that up in conversation… Oh, and by the way, since your accident I know exactly how you are feeling all the time, especially when you and your boyfriend get it on.” She blurted it out before she even thought about what she was saying. Her face flushed. “Oops. I didn’t mean to say that bit out loud.” Faye’s eyes rounded. “Oh my, it’s that detailed?” Holly put her elbows on the table and rested her head in her hands, suddenly weary now that it was out. “Yes, and it’s driving me insane. It’s like having a full-on live sex show running in my head when they are…you know, together.” Across the table, it was Monica’s turn to give a wry smile. “Welcome to my world, honey.” Holly lifted her head and nodded. “Yes, now I know how tough it’s been for you all these years.” Was it a gift, or was it a burden? Holly still hadn’t decided.

Chapter Three

“I’d love to come to dinner, thank you so much for inviting me.” Holly’s response to Stewart’s invitation was immediate and instinctive, but as soon as the words were out she wondered what the hell she was thinking of. Sitting at a dinner table in close proximity with the two of them all evening… Sounds divine. That was lust speaking—not to mention a hefty dose of curiosity—and she knew it. When she tried to be more level-headed about it she realised it was a ludicrous idea. Even now, when they were standing on the second floor landing casually chatting for a couple of minutes, all she could do was look at Stewart and imagine him the way she’d seen him in more intimate circumstances. The man was a total hunk, and she almost felt as if she’d had firsthand experience of his dominant touch, because of her psychic connection with Joshua. Her libido was ramping up, making her all hot and bothered, and this was a quick chat. Being with the two of them like that for any length of time would be damned hard work and it was liable to push her over the edge. Stewart grinned at her, and that left her blushing and speechless. Ever since she had moved in, two years before, she’d thought he was an attractive man. Back then she was sharing with a friend. Caroline used to joke about the hunk next door. He left early in the mornings and Holly had to go out of her way to catch a glimpse of him. She was glad she did. The man was downright gorgeous. Of course she hadn’t a clue that he was into other men, not back then. Caroline used to call him the Scottish hunk. With his defined features, spiked blond hair and gym-built body he was a downright treat to look at. He lived in the city but he was no metrosexual. His gruff accent and forthright manner made it even more of a treat. Besides being the quintessential gym man, he’d kept the rugged quality of his homeland in his manner. She’d never have guessed that he was gay and until her psychic link with Joshua developed she was oblivious. They didn’t act like a couple around each other, not in public at any rate. Stewart was obviously pleased that she’d agreed, and his smile was so devastating it was hard to muster a suitable excuse to backtrack and say she had a prior engagement. “Great, it’ll be fun,” he said, genuinely pleased. His gaze flitted over her, as if he was intrigued by her appearance. Her dental hygienist uniform did that to some people, as if they were trying to work out if she was a nurse or what. “How is Joshua feeling, now that he’s back at work?” She asked the question to give herself a moment to reconsider whether she should make her excuses and stay away. “Much better, thanks. In fact things are almost back to normal, which is a big relief for everybody involved.” His Scottish accent sounded so good, she could listen to his voice all night. Yes, she mused fleetingly, it was a shame she couldn’t hear what he whispered to Joshua while he handled him. She jolted at her own wandering thoughts. She’d spent the past few days cursing the fact she could feel it all and now she wanted more. It was because he looked so good. Being in the presence of one of them was certainly not conducive to creating distance. Just looking at Stewart in his long-sleeved fitted T-shirt and jeans only made her think about what he would look like stripped off. “I’m sure it must be,” she responded. “It was a scary business.” “It was, and we both appreciate what you did that day.” She shrugged. “It was nothing, really. Anyone else would have done the same.” “No, they wouldn’t. Besides, you knew what to do. I’ve had some first-aid training for my job at the gym, but I wouldn’t have handled it as well as you did.” He gave her a warm smile, and it was reflected in his eyes. He looked at her fondly, gratefully. His affection for Joshua was obvious. “Oh, you’d manage. It’s amazing what happens to us in an emergency situation. We pull the resources out of nowhere.” Why did such a gorgeous guy have to be gay? she wondered vaguely. It felt wrong to be thinking that, but the way he smiled at her warmed her right through. “I have to confess,” she added, “I hadn’t realised you two were partners before that day.” Stewart’s smile faded. “Sorry, what did you say?” “I said I hadn’t realised that you’re gay.” The words were out by the time she noticed the frown forming on his forehead. “Oh, God, I’m really sorry. Have I said the wrong thing?” He blinked. “Yes and no.” He was surprised by her comment and Holly wished the earth would open up and swallow her. “I’m so sorry. I’ve spoken out of place.” He shook his head. “Not at all, it’s just that not many people are aware that Joshua and I are more than flatmates.” He stared at her with curiosity. “How did you know?” Holly lowered her eyelids before responding. “Oh, just call it intuition.” She didn’t want to go into the reasons. She and her sisters were cautious about such things. As kids they’d watched Monica being ridiculed and bullied because of her abilities. Children could be especially cruel, but it was a lesson learned early, and over the years the three of them had accepted that the least said about that side of their lives was best mended. Her curiosity got the better of her though. What did he mean by that, yes and no? She forced herself to meet his gaze. In retrospect he didn’t seem offended by her comments, just surprised. As if prompted by her glance, he continued. “I’m bisexual, and I’ve been openly bisexual for a number of years. Joshua and I met when he came to my gym last year. Joshua used to live with a woman and I’m his first male partner. He split with his girlfriend when he realised he was attracted to me. He’s now coming to terms with that, and he is…well,” he paused and gave a wry smile, “he’s trying to identify as gay, but I’m not sure he has to be so pedantic about it. I guess it’s his way.” Bisexual. Of course. It felt as if a piece of jigsaw had slotted into place. Stewart was a sexy, chilled kind of guy, and it made sense. She was fascinated about Joshua’s history, too, but tried not to be too avidly interested lest she look like the proverbial nosy neighbour. It was hard not to, the man had just revealed that he was bisexual. She let the word and its implications run back and forth in her mind, and when she did her body responded. Women and men? Was that at the same time, or separately? All she could do was stare at him and imagine it. Her libido was already roused and it responded to the new information rapidly, her body growing even more hot and restless. It was kind of shocking, too, to find herself so aroused by questions of gender and sexuality. It wasn’t something she’d ever even thought much about, not before her intimate voyeuristic encounters with Joshua and his lover. His bisexual lover. Holly had to glance around the mundane landing of the flats, with its bland numbered doors and utility stainless-steel lift doors, to ground herself. “That must be incredibly hard for Joshua.” It felt like an understatement. Stewart’s expression grew pensive. “Yes, and I’m afraid he makes it even harder on himself. He was happy with his girlfriend, until he realised he loved me more. For me it’s about attraction to a person, not their gender…does that make sense?” Holly nodded. It wasn’t anything she was familiar with, but what he said did make sense. “It’s a big step for him and he hasn’t even told his family yet. That’s why we are not,” he gestured openly with his hands, “out as a couple, as it were.” A nerve in his cheek flickered, and she sensed he wasn’t entirely happy with that but was going along with it for his partner’s sake.

“I see.” “My attitude is to ask why we have to define our sexuality, but I think it’s just the way he has to be, to come to terms with it. At the moment the big step is getting him to come out to his family.” He stared at her for a long moment, a wry smile lingering around his mouth. The two men were dealing with issues beyond what she’d realised. There was occasionally a nagging sense of unease and tension in Joshua, but she’d figured that was about his accident. She felt such a fool now, having blundered into their private life with her heavy-handed comment. It was, perhaps, an inevitable side effect of having Joshua’s highs and lows of emotions fed into her psyche. That didn’t make it any better. “I’m sorry I spoke out of place.” “Don’t be.” He shrugged his shoulders and pushed his hands into his jeans pockets. “Actually, it feels good for me to talk about it while I’m waiting for him to settle. Thank you. However…maybe you should avoid commenting about it to Joshua when you come over.” He winked at her. “Oh, don’t worry,” she replied, hurriedly reassuring him, “I won’t.” He smiled and nodded, gazing into her eyes most directly. How odd, she now felt as if she had a secret bond with Stewart, who was the man she didn’t have a psychic bond with. Great, she thought to herself, this gets more and more complicated. Should she even have agreed to go to dinner? Images flitted through her mind and sensations darted over her skin, her womanly centre flickering to life as she recalled everything she’d experienced because of her connection with Joshua. I should say no, but… It was such a temptation. She wanted to sit at a dinner table with them both. Just once, to see what it was like. They wouldn’t know how much she saw, or what she felt. It was like a forbidden pleasure, but it was one that Holly couldn’t resist.

**** Joshua loosened his tie, poured himself a glass of water from the cooler in the main office and glanced at his watch. Another hour or so and he would be good to wrap up for the day. His current focus was on Asian stock rates and the markets had been winding down. Rolling his shoulder in slow circles, he loosened the tight muscle across his injured collarbone. That evening he had a check-up booked with his doctor and he hoped to get the all clear on his injuries before he headed home. Stewart would be back there by now, and hopefully he’d caught Holly. Joshua really missed seeing her in the mornings. It was a bind having to get the Tube to work, but he needed to find a new bike before he got back to his regular routine. He had a spare bike but it was from his student days and it didn’t have the range of gears he needed. Travelling by Tube train was the one part of London life he couldn’t abide. That and taxi drivers who paid no attention to cyclists on the road. Pushing dark thoughts aside, he focussed on what he might cook for Stewart and Holly instead. It would be good to see her again. There’d been something incredibly comforting about having her by his side when he was first whisked into hospital. Normally things like injuries and check-ups didn’t bother him, but she had a calming, uplifting presence, and that meant he’d been able to laugh at his situation even when he’d been in pain and wondered what the hell was broken and what wasn’t. Stewart teased him about the way he’d talked about her presence, calling it his ‘near-death experience’, but it wasn’t like that. There was a gap in his recall. Then through the red haze of pain and confusion he’d heard her voice calling his name. As her familiar features came into focus he recalled how fretful she’d looked. When he’d responded, relief took the place of concern and she’d smiled. It was that smile he remembered most of all. It was reassuring, like a gift, and it went way beyond exhibiting her concerns for him. It warmed him inside somehow, forcing him to take a deep breath and manage the pain. The worst of it had been when they’d laid him out on the stretcher and put him into the back of the ambulance. That’s when he’d felt the full force of the injury. She’d held his hand and told him to squeeze hers tightly. He did, and it was as if she’d taken some of his pain away. Odd, but true. “Hey Josh,” a voice behind him said, “I’ve got a little bit of office gossip for you, something you might like to know.” Joshua surfaced from his memories. Sully Lloyd stood beside him, paper cup at the ready for some water. Joshua stepped aside, making room for him. Sully had started work in the City around the same time as Joshua, and they’d been friends as well as colleagues for many years. While he helped himself, Sully nodded his head in the direction of the reception area. “I have it on good authority that the new receptionist, Helen, is quite taken with you.” It took a moment for Joshua to realise that the grin on Sully’s face indicated this was hot news. Joshua found himself startled to have such a suggestion put his way. It had to be because he had come to terms with being gay, but he hadn’t yet announced it because he had to tell his family first. Inwardly, he laughed at himself. Here he was thinking his sexuality was a big deal, and now he was surprised people didn’t know already. He took another sip of his water before he responded, finding himself willing to confide in his workmate, a man who he’d known and trusted for nine years. “I’m not on the market for a girlfriend, if that’s what you’re getting at.” “I’ve heard she’d love a date with you. She’s told at least five or six people in the office, and my money is on the fact she’s hoping one of us will tell you. Am I the first to mention it?” Joshua shook his head, amused. “Yes, you’re the first, but I’m still not interested.” Sully pulled back his head, giving a show of amazement. “Seriously? But it has to be…what, five months since you split up with your ex?” It wasn’t about that. Tell him, he urged. In another week he’d have told his family and that was the big hurdle. He was happy in himself, it was telling his mother and father he dreaded. That whole drama about grandkids and him being the eldest son was sure to rain down on him. But his sister, Donna, was getting married in just over a week, and his youngest brother, Kyle, had just turned sixteen. Those events would hopefully deflect some of the disappointment for his parents. Meanwhile, this was a good opportunity to break his silence. “It’s six months since we split but it’s not because of my ex.” He braced himself for the response. “It’s because I’m gay.” Sully stared at him in disbelief, his eyebrows going up then lowering and drawing together. “You’re gay? Since when?” Joshua shrugged. “Since I realised I was more attracted to a man than the woman I was seeing, I guess.” Sully continued to peer at him, but there was nothing offensive in it. In fact he nodded knowingly. “I wondered why you hadn’t been on the scene so much recently.” It amused Joshua that Sully was more concerned about where his party buddy had been than the alteration in his sexuality. “Just coming to terms with it. I’ve kept a low profile.” Sully continued to look at him intently. “That’s no reason to hide yourself away. You’ve been missed in the after-work scene, you have good friends there.” “I appreciate you saying that.” Joshua shrugged. “I guess I had some figuring out to do, and I haven’t yet told the family” “Ah,” Sully responded. “Good luck with that.” “It’ll be done soon.” “So, is there someone special?” “Yes, the guy who made me realise. His name is Stewart.”

Someone called Sully’s name and held up a phone. Sully waved then slapped Joshua on the upper arm. “I hope we get to meet him soon.” He nodded in the direction of the reception. “Oh, and don’t worry about Helen, I could tell her you’re spoken for, if you like?” “Probably for the best,” Joshua replied. “Thanks.” Sully lowered his voice conspiratorially. “Actually, I’d been thinking of asking her out myself, so you’ve done me a favour.” He saluted as he walked away. Joshua laughed, watching him as he headed off. Do I feel any different? Yes, it was if some of the weight he’d been carrying around had been lifted off him. It hadn’t been hard to do. In fact it had felt good. It was bound to be easier with work colleagues and friends than it would be with family. Nevertheless, he was longing for next week to be over. Once Donna was happily married, he could sit down with his parents and tell them about it and it would be out in the open and done with. As he returned to his desk he pictured his mother’s face. She didn’t have a bigoted bone in her body, but she would be sad. It was inevitable. She aspired to having a daughter-in-law she could shop with, and grandkids. His dad was old-fashioned and set in his ways, and he might have more trouble coming to terms with it. Would his father be able to look him in the eye once it was out? He hoped so. Ruefully, he faced up to the fact it might take time. A long time. Fifteen years ago he’d thought the hardest thing he’d ever done was telling them he didn’t want to go into the family business with his dad, and that he wanted to go to university and work in high finance instead. That was nothing compared to this.

**** “Bloody hell,” Holly exclaimed into the night. She’d been lying in bed with her quilt over her face, willing the images and sensations to go away, but it was even worse than the night before and her libido was raging like a forest fire out of control as a result. Next door, Joshua was taking control of proceedings, undressing his lover in between long, luxuriant kisses. The emotions she was getting from him were positive, almost elated. She couldn’t quite follow it, but something that had happened at work had made him this way. He’d also been to the doctor and his collarbone had mended. Tonight he was fit enough to get it on with Stewart just the way he wanted. Stewart was the dominant lover in their relationship, but Joshua liked to feed it back, he liked to exhibit his gratitude and his willingness. Holly sensed wave after wave of emotion coming from Joshua, and it was powerful stuff. The accident had made him appreciate what he had, made him want even more of life’s rich experiences. Riding on the tail of his emotions, she felt breathless with excitement and she found herself smiling, even though she didn’t fully understand why. I want this. That was why. Even though she had spent a good part of the day cursing it and seeking the advice of her sisters, she knew she wouldn’t give up her secret viewing ability for the world. The experience was deeply erotic, arousing and almost exalted in its richly textured emotions. To experience just a taste of it was too good. Somewhere deep inside her mind a voice reminded her she had to have dinner with them the next day. She had to sit there and look as if she knew nothing of their private lives. The problem was she couldn’t help herself. Resting her hand on her chest, she stopped fighting it and pushed away the guilt, allowing herself to take it all in. Pride swelled inside Josh as he undressed this big, brusque man who’d made him turn, the man who’d made him deny what his family expected —a girlfriend, wife and children. With his hands inside the big man’s shirt, he rubbed Stewart’s hard nipples with his fingertips, making Stewart arch and shudder. He ran his hands down his lover’s hard abdomen, stroking each and every muscle, memories whispering through his mind of the times they had first chatted together in Stewart’s gym. Joshua had gone there to work out during the icy weather when he couldn’t cycle as much, the year before. Even after the snow had gone, Stewart kept drawing him back to the place. They chatted, and Joshua gravitated to the times when Stewart was on duty, timing his visits so that they could talk. Sometimes they worked out together if the gym wasn’t busy and Stewart could leave his post at the reception. At first, Joshua identified it as sound male friendship, nothing more. His admiration for Stewart was easy to excuse at first. Until one day they had an encounter in the communal male shower area, and there was no denying what he really wanted. As the memory of that forbidden encounter flitted through his mind, ever so briefly, Holly’s lust hit fever pitch. She thrust her hand between her legs, cupping her pussy tightly and squeezing it for relief. Too soon his thoughts moved on, and she prayed and hoped that he would think of that first encounter again. She wanted to know what had gone on and how their first sexual encounter had evolved. Capturing her bottom lip between her teeth, she tried to ground herself, but it was no good. Joshua was now thinking about what he was about to do to Stewart. Going to make you come, lover. The determined thought echoed round Holly’s mind. Holly groaned and writhed in her bed, her fingers paddling her swollen clitoris. It wasn’t good enough. What she wanted was what she could feel tantalisingly through that psychic connection—a hard cock. Her face heated as the blatant realisation ran through her. Joshua was so vividly aware of his erection and what he wanted to do with it, it drove her wild. She wanted to be there with them and she couldn’t help imagining how it might feel to hold both their cocks, one in each hand, and work them up and down. She squeezed her clit, spreading her juices over it. It still wasn’t enough. The nagging ache at the pit of her belly was building, until all she could think about was finding relief, filling herself with something hard and riding it. She threw back the quilt and leapt out of bed, charging for the wardrobe. Dropping to her knees, she rooted around inside it. Two years ago her flatmate, Caroline, had given her a vibrator as a joke for Christmas. She’d never wanted to use the thing, not until now. Now she was desperate for something big and hard inside her and masturbating with her fingers just wasn’t cutting it tonight. “Too damned close, but too far away,” she muttered. Meanwhile Joshua had released Stewart’s impressive erection from his jeans and was stroking it. She could feel the heat of it in her hand and needed the vibrator to fill the space where she wanted it to be. In between stacks of shoes and retired handbags, her hand knocked up against the stiff plastic packaging and she retrieved it from the depths of the wardrobe. Darting back to the bed, she attempted to get it open as she went, which seemed almost impossible. Eventually she prised off the packaging and got the thing out. It felt magnificent under her fingers, long and hard and phallic. She never thought she’d be so glad to see the wretched thing, but now she wanted to worship it. She switched it on. Her heart fell. “No batteries!” She darted to her dressing table drawer, rifled around and found an open package. Mercifully the requisite number of batteries was in the packet and the thing came on when she fitted them. By the time she got back on the bed and got comfy with her new best friend, Joshua was on his knees in front of Stewart, giving him what she could only describe as the most unbelievably sexy blowjob she had ever seen or imagined, while raking his fingernails over the big guy’s sexy arse cheeks, and it was driving her mental with lust. Holly paused and savoured the absolute sexual pleasure of witnessing such an experience—the incredible vision of male eroticism. The way they handled each other thrilled her, and the hot passion between them was the most intensely arousing she’d ever witnessed. Once again guilt clawed at her conscience, then lust pumped through her, overriding it for the moment at least. She flipped the switch on her vibrator. It started to hum, and the overpowering need for release drove her to take action. She ran the vibrator into her sticky folds then eased it over her clit. The swollen nub thrummed in delight, and she moved the vibrator either side of it while she focussed on what was

happening between her neighbours. Stewart stood in the middle of the bedroom. The moonlight from the window outlined him and the man keeling at his feet. She was fascinated by the way Joshua worked him. He was an intense man, and that was reflected in the way he made love to Stewart, who was more visceral and raw in his approach to sex. Joshua studied his lover’s reactions, acting on them. The building pressure he felt in his own cock made Holly thrust the vibrator deep inside. If I were there, she thought, as she worked the vibrator in and out, I could be the one sucking Stewart, and have Joshua’s cock inside me. She pictured herself on her hands and knees between them. The deviant thought made her gasp aloud and squirm, and she flicked the vibrator up a notch, unable to string it out. Then she felt Joshua working his lover faster, stroking his shaft with one hand as he took a good portion of it into his mouth, his free hand raking over Stewart’s fit buttocks, giving the big man the edge of pain that he liked. That was too much for her and Holly came, her core clamping on to the sex toy. By the time she’d levelled and the toy had slipped free of her slick channel, Stewart came. Moments later—while Joshua wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and grinned up at him—Stewart pulled him to his feet and directed him to the bed. When Joshua reclined, the big man was over him in a flash, on his hands and knees as he returned the favour, sucking him off. Cursing into the night, Holly wondered if this would drive her mad. She was a slave to the connection. Why was this happening to her? And why in hell’s name had she agreed to go to dinner with them? I must already be mad. With a heartfelt, lusty sigh, she reached once again for the vibrator.

Chapter Four

Holly’s concerns about whether it was the right thing to do or not slipped from her mind the moment Joshua opened the door the next evening. He beamed at her and beckoned her in. After he took the bottle of wine she held in one hand, he wrapped his free arm around her shoulder and kissed her cheek. Holly’s senses flared into life, her nervousness forgotten as the intimate gesture melted her. His thoughts, too, were deeply pleasured, as if seeing her there made him happy. “You smell good, look damned good too.” He looked her dress over approvingly. “Bella, bella.” “Thanks. Hey, do you have Italian blood?” It popped into her head because of his choice of words. It also made sense of his dark good looks. “Yes indeed, on my mother’s side. She was born in a small town outside Naples, but she’s been living in England since she was six years old.” “That explains a lot.” He gave her a curious glance. “The dark hair and…” she nodded her head into the flat, “…I can smell something delicious. Garlic, if I’m not mistaken.” “Very astute. I hope you like garlic?” “I love garlic.” She couldn’t help smiling. He took her hand and led her into the kitchen. “It’s a pleasure to cook for someone who appreciates the importance of a good aroma. My flatmate would live on steak and eggs, given half a chance.” Holly resisted the urge to respond to that. Pushing aside her intimate knowledge, she reminded herself that as far as she was concerned they were just flatmates and no more. Instead, she admired the way he looked. She usually encountered him in cycle gear—which had its own appeal, being skin tight and all—or a suit for work. This evening he was wearing an indigo-blue smart-casual shirt, open at the neck, sleeves rolled up, and fitted jeans. He was a good-looking man, lean and intense, with brown eyes that made people do a double-take because they were rich as dark chocolate. As she followed him down the hallway her gaze dropped to his hips, and a series of intimate images of him and Stewart flashed through her mind. She tossed back her hair and took a deep breath, attempting to blot them out. She couldn’t afford to let images like that distract her, not tonight. He put his arm loosely around her waist and directed her to the table, which was set for three. “And you have a sweet tooth…right? Please tell me of a sweet tooth.” She nodded. “Stewart won’t eat anything too indulgent, because his body is ‘a temple’ or some nonsense. It’s good to have you to spoil.” Holly glanced over at the cooker. Every burner was on and the oven, too, by the looks of it. “Wow, how much are you cooking?” “Just a few dishes to choose from. I made an effort, seeing as it was you.” There was a new sense of intimacy between them. It struck Holly and she wondered if he was aware of the deeper connection. He’d been grateful she’d been there that day, at the accident and after, she knew that, and it had made them closer. It would, she supposed, but she doubted he knew how much closer she was to him now. His expression grew serious. “It’s a small gesture. I can never thank you enough for what you did for me.” Holly stared into his eyes. She saw gratitude and something more. There was definitely a new sense of understanding between them. She tried to sense if he was aware of it. Yes, her psychic connection told her that he did feel closer to her, but he believed it was because she’d been there in his hour of need. For a moment it made her more comfortable about her secret knowledge of him. He leaned over and hugged her. At first she was startled then Holly let herself slide into the embrace, wrapping her arms around his back. “Thank you,” he whispered against her ear. “I only did what anyone else would do,” she said. “No need to go to any trouble because of that.” He was thinking about her, specifically thinking about seeing her when he came round and how good that had been. Holding her close, he hugged her. When she breathed him in, her heart rate lifted. The smell of his cologne and his underlying essence affected her. Holly’s eyelids fluttered down and her breath caught in her throat. The hard line of his body against hers felt so damn sexy that heat pooled in her groin. An image of him up against the wall with Stewart shunting against him flashed through her mind. She opened her eyes and willed it away, but when she did she saw Stewart standing in the doorway, watching them. That made her hotter still. He was just pulling a shirt on, his belt hanging open and his hair still damp from the shower. Her gaze drifted over his splendid physique. One glimpse of his bare chest—so built and powerful—made her situation worse. Captured in Joshua’s embrace while looking across his shoulder at Stewart, half-dressed, turned her on even more. There was a curious look on Stewart’s face and it was somewhere between brooding and aroused. For a moment she thought he was looking at them both with sexual hunger, but she dismissed it. It was Joshua he wanted, she was incidental. However, it made her seriously address what he’d said the day before about being bisexual. He wanted women too. Images of the two men together on the bed filled her mind again, but this time mixed in with them was the desire to be right there with them, to be more than a secret voyeur, to be an actual participant. The deviant desire to be between them shocked her. Impossible, she reminded herself. They were a couple. She was just a neighbour who’d become a friend. Drawing free of Joshua’s embrace she forbade herself to think such thoughts, but her body was refusing to cooperate. Between her thighs she was hot and damp, her entire groin sizzling with expectation. Now she knew for sure that she had done the wrong thing. She was insane, having accepted an invitation to sit at a dinner table with two guys who she’d secretly witnessed so thoroughly compromised. What she’d seen and experienced had turned her on, but it was only now standing in the kitchen with them so close at hand, so real and so male, that she could no longer deny her deepest desire—to join them. Joshua stroked her cheek and smiled, then reached past her and pulled out a chair. “Get comfy. I’ll finish off the preparations.” As she took the seat he pulled out for her, she sensed a kind of yearning in him, which she identified as the eagerness to thank her, to repay her in some way. “I’m on wine duty, right?” Stewart said as he joined them, pushing his shirt into his jeans and reaching for the loosely buckle. “Yup, it’s open and breathing in the sitting room,” Joshua replied. Holly had to tear her gaze from his hands as he buckled up that belt. “Sorry about this, I’m running late,” he commented, when he caught her eye. He grinned. Was that a naughty look she saw in his expression? “He’s a showoff,” Joshua interjected. “Any chance to reveal his stunning pecs and he’ll use it.” Stewart shrugged that off and disappeared, returning a moment later with two bottles. Holly took a large swig of the wine as soon as it was poured, grateful for the distraction. “Here’s to good company,” Joshua lifted his glass. When the three of them chinked their glasses together, Holly became increasingly aware of his buoyant mood. For Joshua, tonight was about being with friends and forgetting about forthcoming family nuptials and the stress of big announcements. While he served up the food—a selection of dishes including salmon and broccoli in pesto, linguini, and baked eggs Florentine—Holly found herself

chatting with Stewart about the difference in their flats. “Your kitchen diner is the other way around to mine, and so much bigger,” she said. “I gutted it when I bought the place. Is yours a two-bed?” “Yes, and it has much smaller rooms in general.” Joshua started heaping her plate with food and she had to wave her hand because he was giving her enough for four. Meanwhile, Stewart went for the salmon and the eggs. “That’s what I came to look at but then I saw this one. It has three beds and was more than I wanted to pay, but the sitting room has dual aspect and it’s a great view. I figured I’d sublet a room to cover the extra expense.” “I can see that would be tempting. Mine’s at the back of the building, no view to speak of, but I’m only renting.” She tasted the salmon and nodded, warbling her approval while she ate. “This is so good.” Josh beamed. “You moved in with someone else,” Stewart asked, “didn’t you?” “Yes, a friend, Caroline. We work together. She got engaged and then moved in with her fiancé.” “Who do you rent from?” “Jim Brentwood, he’s a retired historian, lives on the ground floor. He owns three or four of the flats in the building, invested in them years ago. Do you know him?” When they shook their heads, she smiled. “I bet you’ve seen him. He’s quite a character, and a good landlord, very easy going.” The conversation continued on in the reasonably safe areas of work, home and food during the meal, much to Holly’s relief. She had to keep pulling her thoughts back to the straight and narrow, because it was difficult to stop admiring them across the table, but mostly she managed it. That was until Joshua told her what he had in mind for dessert. “Taste test?” she queried, voice faltering. “Yes, shut your eyes and I’ll feed you.” At the same time as she felt his sense of fun building, her internal warning signals began to sound.

**** Joshua stared at Holly, mesmerised. She had the most sensuous mouth he’d ever seen. Her lips were full and suggested a passionate nature. What would it be like to kiss her? he wondered. Fascinated, he paused as he was about to feed her a spoonful of tiramisu. “Josh?” He met Stewart’s inquisitive glance. Stewart stood behind Holly with his hands over her eyes as they teased her with the desserts, getting her to guess what each one was from the flavour. After a hugely enjoyable meal and much laughter, it had seemed like a fun thing to do. Joshua felt wired and yet somehow mellow at the same time. The good company had made him that way. Holly was a joy to be around. Stewart gave him a quizzical glance. Joshua snapped into action. “Open wide,” he encouraged. Her lower lip trembled slightly as she waited, the tip of her tongue just visible inside her lips. When he looked lower, at the pale skin of her throat, he could see a pulse beating rapidly at the base. With her lips parted and her trusting pose, all he could do was stare at her. It was a sexy look, and it suited her. She was an intriguing woman, with a tentative smile and eyes that made him think of a summer sky, clear and pale blue and filled with possibility. If he wasn’t already in a relationship—and he wasn’t gay—he’d be tempted to ask her out. Holly gave a sharp intake of breath and tensed. Weird. Joshua felt as if he must have said that aloud, because of her reaction. Stewart gave a wry laugh, shifting the strange mood. “Are you going to give her that, or torture us both by making her wait?” When Joshua met his accusing glance, Stewart cocked his head on one side, an accusing look in his eye. “This blindfold taste session is turning me on.” “Oh, Stewart, please don’t say that,” Holly said, in a distinctly breathless tone. She reached back and grasped his forearm with one hand, squeezing it, a nervous laugh escaping her. Her cheeks had flushed with colour. It was true though. Joshua could tell his lover was aroused, and the strange thing was that he was, too. The setup should have felt peculiar, it should have felt wrong, but it didn’t. Just a playful moment between three friends, he assured himself, and forced his actions on. “Here it comes.” As he put the spoonful of decadent dessert between her lips and she closed her mouth, some of it was left smudged on her lips. Stewart bent over her, and wiped it away with one finger. When he took that finger to his own mouth and sucked it, it was with a devilish glance in Joshua’s direction. What the hell was that about? Joshua had the distinct feeling Stewart was playing a game all of his own. “Ah, delicious.” She nodded her head. “Tiramisu, my favourite.” Stewart removed his hands, but rested them on her shoulders and again locked gaze with Joshua. The teasing glance lingered there in his eyes and Joshua felt unsettled by it. That feeling didn’t ease up any when he looked down at Holly. Unveiled, her expression was verging on astonished. She looked at him with curiosity and wonder. Surely his dessert couldn’t alone have brought that about? The phone rang and somehow it felt as if he’d been saved by the bell. “I’ll get that.” He headed over to where the phone was stationed on a wall unit. Picking it up, he answered then wedged it between his chin and his shoulder while he filled the kettle, preparing to make coffee. “Hello, love.” “Hi, Mum.” “I’m not interrupting am I? I hear music.” “No, you’re not interrupting. We’ve got Holly over for—” “Holly from the hospital?” she interrupted, and she sounded delighted. His mother had raved about Holly when he’d been stuck in the hospital. Not surprisingly. Holly was pretty, grounded and sweet-natured. She had a heart of gold, and his mum had said as much. What mother wouldn’t like her? “Yes, Holly from the hospital.” He glanced over at them to see if they’d noticed what was being said, but they were otherwise occupied. Stewart had sat down next to Holly and faced her, one hand loosely along the back of her chair. They were whispering to each other over the plate of biscotti, and Joshua noticed the way Stewart was looking at her. He really was attracted to her. For a moment Joshua didn’t hear what was being said at the other end of the phone. Stewart was bisexual, and although Joshua knew that he’d never seen him with a woman. Well, not one that he was attracted to. It was a strange experience. Was it jealousy? He didn’t feel that way, not exactly. It was, however, a bit perturbing. Stewart sensed he was watching, and smiled over at him. Joshua realised his mum had said the same thing twice at the end of the phone, the second time louder. “Sorry, what was that?” “I said you haven’t forgotten it’s the buffet, tomorrow night after your sister’s wedding rehearsal? You said you were coming.” “No, I haven’t forgotten, family dinner tomorrow at eight, right?” “Bring Holly,” his mother said at the other end of the phone. “I’m so pleased you’ve got such a lovely girlfriend.”

What the hell? Joshua froze. Why did she think that, just because Holly was over for dinner? He hadn’t indicated any more. As if he didn’t have enough problems announcing his current sexuality status to his family, now his mother assumed he had a girlfriend. “We’re just good friends.” His mum chuckled. “Oh, I could tell she was more than that when I met her, my boy. Take your time, it’ll work out.” Joshua felt a rising sense of discomfort. He still had the kettle in one hand, and he put it down while he wondered how in hell he’d managed to indicate to his mother that Holly and he were an item. She was burbling away happily at the other end of the phone. Take it by the horns, he decided. “As I said, Holly and I are just friends,” he interrupted, “but hold on, I’ll ask her now.” Holly had turned his way and was looking at him with a concerned expression on her face. “Holly, you met my mum at the hospital, and she’s asked if you would you like to come over tomorrow night?” Initially, he prayed she’d say no, that she would have another event on. It was the simplest thing and it would discourage his mother from assuming they were an item, and yet part of him wanted her to be at the event. He’d enjoyed her company, and he wanted his family to meet her. “It’s nothing formal,” he added, trying to encourage her. “My sister is getting married and it’s a bit of a family gathering to wish her well.” In the background he could see that Stewart was wryly amused by the situation, damn him. Holly stared at him for a long moment then nodded. “Okay,” she replied. There was a little trepidation in her voice, as if she wasn’t quite sure, and he hoped his initial reaction hadn’t been too obvious. “I’m so glad she can come,” his mother said at the other end of the phone, obviously able to hear all of the discussion. “She’s such a lovely girl.” She sounded so pleased that he didn’t have the heart to clarify it a third time. “Oh, and you must bring your flatmate as well.” Once again, Joshua froze. He gave a deep internal groan. “Yes of course, I’ll do that.” “See you all then,” she replied, apparently delighted. When he put the phone down he gave Stewart an apologetic glance. He had his knowing expression on and had clearly got the gist of the conversation. Joshua wanted to say it was no big deal. Stewart already thought he was overcomplicating his life by waiting to make his announcement. An uneasy silence descended after the phone call ended. Holly was the one who broke the awkward moment, and she was looking at him with concern. “Please don’t worry about it. It’s just a bit of a party, right?” Was it that obvious he was worried? Joshua supposed it must be. “I’d appreciate it if you came with me. It’s a family thing but I’ll explain that you’re not my girlfriend when we get there. I don’t want anyone getting the wrong idea” Should he say more? They both stared at him. Stewart laughed wryly and shook his head, reaching for his wine glass. “No, you wouldn’t want anyone to get the wrong idea.” There was bitterness in his tone. “Stewart, please, it just happened.” Stewart’s head jerked up. He was definitely unhappy about the situation. Joshua’s frustration grew. His partner had been patient up until now, but things were getting out of hand. He needed to clear this up with his family as soon as possible. He wanted that too, once Donna’s wedding was over. He wasn’t going to mess up her special week by stepping forward with his news right now. “What?” Stewart asked. “You want me to sit here and watch while you make your life even more of a mess than it already is, give you even more to stress over?” Joshua gave a mental groan. “No, but having this conversation now isn’t fair on Holly.” Stewart scowled. “Bloody hell, Josh. Holly knows we’re in a relationship.” Holly knew? Joshua looked at Stewart, then Holly, in turn. She did know. She wasn’t confused by what was being said. Had Stewart told her? “Stewart didn’t tell me.” She blurted that out then blushed. “If that’s what you’re wondering…” “Holly had a hunch,” Stewart explained, his voice ringing with sarcasm. “And she doesn’t have a problem with it, despite your need for secrecy.” “I don’t have a need for secrecy,” Joshua said between gritted teeth, “I’m just waiting for the right moment.” Holly gave Joshua a sympathetic glance, lifted her napkin off her lap and put it on the table. “Maybe I should go.” He stared at her, and the one thing he was certain of was that he didn’t want her to go. It had been good and he didn’t want the evening to end yet, especially not on such an awkward note. “No, please don’t.” He joined them at the table and reached for the wine bottle, topping up their glasses. When Holly settled and reached for her glass, he felt relief. “Actually it feels good that you know.” “Well,” Stewart said, voice still dripping with sarcasm, “I hate to say I told you so.” “All right already.” He took a grateful swig of his wine. “I know it’ll be better out, and I want that. But it’s Donna’s week, so I’ll do it after the wedding.” He looked at Holly. She smiled, and her expression was even warmer than before. That felt good. He returned her smile. “I’m sorry about the mix-up with my mum.” Instinctively he put his hand out and covered hers where it wrapped around the stem of her wine glass on the table. She blinked slowly, and he felt as if he was basking in her smile, like some mutual warmth had somehow been shared. “Don’t worry about it,” she replied, “really. Hey, it’s an evening out. A single girl can’t afford to miss any parties that are going on.” Something about her put him at ease. He noticed that Stewart had lost his bitter look, too. “I can understand your hesitation,” she continued. “It’s a big week for your family. I’m sure they have enough on their minds already. We’ll go as friends and it’ll be fun, and then you can do your thing next week.” Stewart gave a sardonic laugh. “So you get to go to a party, and I get to sit at home with takeout.” “Um, no. Mum in her generosity included my flatmate, in case you got lonely.” Holly didn’t seem surprised by that. Stewart’s eyebrows lifted. The three of them exchanged glances, then Holly chuckled and they were laughing about it. “I’ll have to remember not to pat you on the arse,” Stewart said. “Yes,” Holly agreed, “and I’ll have to remember to get jealous if you accidentally do.” “Oh man,” Josh said, nodding, “what a minefield. It could only happen to me.” But somehow it didn’t seem such a big issue, not with Holly there diffusing the mood with her sunny smile and her gentle, understanding nature. Somehow she made it feel all right.

Chapter Five

Stewart had to work hard on his self-restraint in order not to tease Joshua, after Holly had gone. Joshua had already screwed up enough and he knew it, and that’s the only reason why Stewart buttoned his lip. In just over a week, Joshua was going to come out to his family. He was tense about it and he’d been withdrawn. The fact he’d been dealing with an injury and wasn’t able to cycle every day didn’t help either. Stewart reclined on the bed, watching for Joshua to emerge from the bathroom. It had been good to see him enjoying Holly’s company. Joshua was a social person, and the evening had been fun. Joshua walked in a moment later and stepped over to the full-length mirror on the wardrobe, still brushing his teeth. “She’s a great girl,” he commented, in between brushes. Stewart nodded. “She is.” Joshua stopped brushing and looked at his frothed teeth in the mirror with a critical stare. “Do you think she looks at everybody’s teeth? I mean, because of her job?” Stewart laughed. It was so hard not to tease. “Oh, yeah, I’m sure she does. Why, are you worried you might not be up to scratch? She might have high toothy standards when it comes to her neighbours.” Joshua shot him a look. “You may well laugh, but I know for a fact you check out everybody’s level of physical fitness, whether you are aware of it or not.” Stewart shrugged. He was curious about something other than teeth. Joshua was very interested in their neighbour. It went beyond a thank-you dinner. Josh returned to the bathroom. A moment later he was back and stood in front of the mirror, scrubbing his short hair with his knuckles before turning to the bed. “If only that stupid misunderstanding with my mother hadn’t happened.” Stewart wanted to comment acerbically. It was getting harder to hold his tongue. “It’s a party, we get to hang out with Holly again. You can sort it out later.” Josh nodded. His thoughts were elsewhere. Still with Holly, apparently. “Yeah, and it was really good of her to play along with it.” He had a distant look in his eyes, then he pulled back, making eye contact, smiling. “Can you believe she made us laugh about it?” Stewart scanned his lover’s lean form, taking in the bulge of his cock in his soft cotton jockey shorts. Interesting. From that a person might surmise that Joshua had been turned on by their dinner companion. He was about to comment on that but once again thought better of it. All in good time. Instead he reached for Joshua, hauling him on to the bed. He landed on his side, facing Stewart. “Yes, she certainly does have a knack of breaking the tension,” Stewart responded. Wrapping his hand over one of Joshua’s fit buttocks, he wrenched his jockeys down. “How about I help you relieve some more?” Josh responded eagerly, his hips moving. “Sounds good.” Stewart happily claimed his mouth. Even so, he had the feeling it was the calm before the storm, because there was no way Joshua could be as relaxed about the situation tomorrow night, Holly or no Holly.

**** In the flat next door Holly stood in her shower, begging the warm water to purge her of the powerful connection she was experiencing. After the evening spent with Joshua and Stewart it was even more intense, and now as she tried to wash it away in her bathroom, she felt a wave of warm emotion from very close by. It dawned on her that their bathroom backed on to hers. Joshua was thinking about her, and it was as if he craved her company again, even though she had just left. Much as she had all evening, Holly felt as if he was drawn to her emotionally and physically. When she tried to rationalise it, she knew it should feel like a dangerous game to her—being around him and feeling those things when he was in a couple with another person—but his spirit was fraught with tension and her nurturing instinct was triggered by that. It meant that she wanted to respond to him, to be there if he needed her. As she reflected on it, it seemed as if that feeling tied into what Faye had said about responsibility. That was how Holly had felt, ever since the accident. And more than that, she admitted, with a sigh. Caring was one thing, wanting was another. While she had been with them the psychic link had felt less of a burden—as if she was going along with the flow of events, rather than secretly spying. And Joshua had wanted her there. That was the key element for her. He’d wanted her to say yes to the surprise invitation. The initial chaos he’d felt made her want to leave, but that lasted only a moment and what won out was hope, hope that she would go along with it. How could she not agree? Everything in her wanted to be there with him, partly to support him, partly because her connection demanded it. She’d had a crush on Joshua before the accident; she admitted that to herself now. There was no denying it. Truth be told, she had a crush on both of them, hard as it was for her to come to terms with that. The opportunity to spend some more time with them had presented itself and she was glad. At least being with them while being connected to Joshua felt much less deviant, she mused. She turned around under the shower, sluicing water through her hair, rinsing away the shampoo. She froze, and her lower lip caught between her teeth as she was once again swamped by images of the two of them. They were making love next door. It was so intense and sudden that she reached for the ceramic soap holder, holding on to it to steady herself. Stewart had grabbed Joshua and pulled him on to the bed. He tugged his jockey shorts off, and was now marking Joshua’s fit buttocks with his teeth, biting him playfully while he eased one finger into his back passage. Joshua’s response was intense, his erection throbbing as he lay face down on the bed, his torso arching up, fingers clutching at the pillows. A moment later Stewart doused him with lube between his buttocks, donned a condom, and laid over him. The speed at which anticipation built in Joshua was staggering. Holly was right there, as if she was lassoed and physically pulled into the moment, her body brimming with sensory stimulation, her womanly centre throbbing. With his lubed fist wrapped around Joshua’s cock, Stewart entered Joshua’s back passage. The intense stimulation from Joshua made Holly grasp for the shower curtain. Her legs had gone weak under her. She reached for the shower controls and turned the water off. She had to get out of there and sit down, before she slithered to a damp heap of arousal on the cubicle floor. Almost staggering, she grabbed a towel, wrapped herself in it and sat down on the toilet lid. Closing her eyes, she hunched over, arms wrapped around her waist, scarcely even aware of her wet hair dripping on to her thighs. Stewart crooned to Joshua while he eased his considerable erection inside him. Joshua’s fingers dug deeper into the pillows as Stewart urged him to relinquish. His balls throbbed, ejaculation imminent. When his body gave and Stewart pushed deep, edgy emotions shot through him. The dark thrill of being owned, being invaded, by Stewart was like a decadent narcotic, and Josh was flying high on it. With Stewart’s cock massaging from the rear while his fist jerked him off, Joshua was in ecstasy.

Holly thrust her hand between her legs and rubbed herself vigorously. Lust burned in her. It wasn’t enough. Resting one foot up against the edge of the bath, she opened her legs wide and rested her shoulders back against the cistern. With her free hand she opened her folds then thrust two fingers inside, hungry for release, desperate for it. This is what they are doing to me, making me crazy. In the flat next door, Joshua hit his peak. Static needled his entire skin. He roared aloud as he ejaculated. Holly took herself over the edge, her body squirming, her hips rocking back and forth as she rode her fingers and orgasm blistered through her. She slumped back, shocked at the intensity of what she’d experienced, helplessly bound to it. The drip, drip, drip of a shower not turned off properly counted the time as it passed. It took a good two minutes or so for her to level. That was when it occurred to her that in less than twenty-four hours she would be with them again. With a self-deprecating laugh, she shook her head. How the hell am I going to look them in the eye tomorrow night, after this? Well, she had to do it. No backing out this time, because she’d promised and Josh needed her. Pulling her towel into position she stood up, and faced the fact that it was going to take some high-level meditation to push it out of her mind and be nothing more than a social butterfly.

Chapter Six

Joshua’s family home was a large, semi-detached house in the north London suburb of Ruislip. By the time they got there the street was lined with cars and the party was spilling through all the rooms, the animated crowd visible through the windows. Despite the fact it was a cold spring night, the front door stood open to greet them as they pulled up on the opposite side of the street. Holly peered out of the car and reflected that Mrs Dawson’s comment about a small family gathering was a definite understatement. Had she done that to play it down, to encourage Joshua to attend? From what he’d said during dinner the night before, he’d not been his usual social self since the accident. What with that and the changes in his relationship status over the past year, he’d stayed away. Holly, who was party to all of that through her psychic connection, longed to see what he was like without all of it haunting him. She couldn’t help wanting to see him unburdened and truly happy. He was getting there. In fact he was up and eager for the party all day long. Stewart parked the car then turned to Josh. “Well, good luck.” “Is that sarcasm I detect in your tone?” Joshua gave a wry laugh. Holly smiled to herself. She was aware of his underlying concerns, but, more than that, she knew he wanted to be here with both of them. There was a deviant edge to that, they both felt it, but he wanted it nonetheless. That made her simmer, and she was already enjoying herself as a result. Processing Josh’s emotions was becoming quite the ride, because Josh had surprised himself over the course of the day. His initial reaction to the way this had transpired faded, because he’d convinced himself that the focus would be on his sister, Donna, and her fiancé, Will. He’d pushed away a lot of the tension surrounding his forthcoming announcement about Stewart and their relationship, if only for the time being. Josh held her door for her as she climbed out. “You look beautiful,” he said, looking over her outfit with approval. “Yes,” Stewart interjected teasingly, as he locked the car. “I wish you were my date. I’d appreciate you so much more than he does.” I do appreciate her, jerk. Josh’s thought ran around her mind and Holly suppressed a laugh. Josh shook his head, but he was amused. Holly couldn’t help smiling. To think she’d been nervous about this evening. She straightened her outfit—a new slinky red dress that she’d gone out and bought especially, and a contrasting black bolero—squeezed his arm, and chuckled. “I have to make a confession…even though it’s not real it feels as if I’m having a date with both of you. You’re gorgeous men, how lucky am I?” Was she being naughty? Hell, yes. She did feel like that, but there didn’t seem any harm in saying so. Stewart responded by linking her arm. He reached in to kiss her cheek, breathing her in as he did so. “Mmm, you say all the right things.” That sparked her libido. Joshua stared at the pair of them. Holly could feel the wave of pride and longing that took hold of him. He rubbed at his head, then shrugged and got on the other side of her, linking her other arm. “This does feel good,” Stewart commented. Holly nodded, feeling it too. A decadent sense of fun was loosely in her veins. It was dangerous and she knew it. Her sanity and her affections were at risk. Forty-eight hours earlier she’d been worried about allowing herself that one dinner with them both, and now she’d gone several steps further. But being with them felt too good, and the fact that she was doing Josh a favour made it so much easier to ignore the risks. It was a risk, though. She was a secret voyeur on their private love life, and touching them like this made her crazy. But it was a good kind of crazy, a crazy that made her toss back her hair and savour the feeling of liberation that coursed through her. “Come on,” Josh said, “let’s party.” Holly couldn’t stop smiling, which meant she entered the Dawson family home on a wave of tremulous anticipation the likes of which she hadn’t experienced before. It won’t last. Where did that thought come from? Holly wasn’t sure any more, but she hated the rude interruption to such a great moment. She glanced at Joshua. He felt that way too, but she would have anyway. He glanced at his companions from under hooded eyes, watchful and protective. His doubts were being pushed down, but they ran deep and they were indelible. Holly stepped into the house with her chin lifted, determined to support him. Everyone they encountered embraced Josh and he could hardly get the introductions done. Mrs Dawson was apparently on the look-out, and they’d barely made it halfway down the hallway when she popped her head around the door from the room beyond and darted out to greet them. Mrs Dawson embraced her with genuine warmth. “It’s lovely to see you again, and to see Joshua with a girlfriend,” she said, “you’re very welcome my dear.” “Just friends, Mum,” Joshua stated, with a warning glance at Stewart. His mother waved her hand at him as if he was talking nonsense. Even though he’d clarified, his mother’s welcome made Holly feel like an impostor and that levelled her mood somewhat. As if that wasn’t bad enough, she started to get vibes from Joshua immediately. He’d been hit by the realisation that Stewart was right—pretending to have a girlfriend was only going to make it worse for him in the long run. Guilt weighed heavily on him. Stewart, who instinctively seemed to be aware of the shifting tides of emotion, stepped in and shook Mrs Dawson’s hand. “Lovely to see you again, and might I say how radiant you look.” Josh’s mother beamed. “Many thanks for inviting me,” he added. She embraced him fondly. “Nonsense, it’s lovely to have you here, and you must both come to the wedding as well. I insist on it.” Joshua’s head lifted and he looked at his mother with an inquiring glance. Obviously sensitive to his concern, she responded quickly. “There’ll be plenty of room, don’t worry about that. Your cousin Jeanette has broken her leg and you’ll be doing us a favour taking up dinners that would otherwise go to waste. It’s all paid for, no refunds at this stage. Your father is in a gripe about it, so please, take up those places.” Holly watched it all, intrigued. Was his mum more sensitive to his ways than he realised? Had something been given away when she’d witnessed Stewart and Joshua in the hospital? Holly wondered on it. Joshua went to speak, but his mother ushered them along. “You’d better hurry because the whole family is here and the buffet is being demolished. Get stuck in before it’s all gone.” They were herded through the house, which was already full of people clustered in groups in various rooms on the ground floor and sitting on the stairs. As she led them through to the kitchen and supervised them obtaining some food and drink, she narrated the various mishaps of the wedding rehearsal. “Poor Will was so nervous he forgot his own middle name, and your sister—you’d have been proud—had to remind him.” “Bodes well,” Josh said, almost to himself. Holly could tell he was glad the spotlight was on his sister, who he loved and thought deserved it so much more than he did. “Kyle was supposed to be ushering,” Mrs Dawson continued, “but he figured there wouldn’t be anyone to usher what with it being a rehearsal, and the verger found him outside studying the graves and thought he was ‘up to no good’.” She chortled. “Next thing we know we’re halfway through the rehearsal and he’s fighting to get back into the church. When you think about how much he balked at being given some duties for the day, it was rather

entertaining.” A younger, dark-haired woman approached. “Embarrassing is what it was. The vicar thinks we’re nothing but trouble.” Holly figured the woman who had chipped in had to be Josh’s sister, Donna. The similarity in looks was there, and they’d both inherited their Italian mother’s colouring. Sure enough, Josh embraced her and called her ‘sis’ when he made the introductions. Joshua’s sister was beaming ear to ear, clearly delighted about her forthcoming nuptials, and she looked at Holly and Stewart with curiosity as she was introduced. When Stewart gripped her hand, she purred aloud. She batted her eyelids at him. “That’s quite a grip you’ve got there. It’s just as well I’m engaged and about to be married, otherwise I’d be round at Josh’s visiting all the time.” Stewart reacted by drawing her hand to his mouth and kissing it. “Your company would have been appreciated.” He handled it so well, so casual, and yet so flirty. It was the way he was, laid-back and genial. Holly had so much less of an inside understanding of him compared to Joshua, but nevertheless she sensed it was only extreme situations that made Stewart tense. It just wasn’t in his nature. Even though Joshua’s procrastination about coming out had begun to grate, he was biding his time, being patient and understanding. It must be hard, Holly realised. Joshua had been called over by another group. “Cousins,” Donna explained, when she noticed both Holly and Stewart watching. He was a social creature and looked right at home here mingling with people, sharing a joke and drink. The big secret was holding him back from that, or at least holding them back from doing it together. “Holly, I understand you’re Joshua’s girlfriend.” Holly started. She felt Stewart tense at her side. “Actually, your mum has read too much into it. We’re just good friends.” “Ah, I see.” Donna gained a knowing look. “She does that, don’t let it bother you.” As she spoke she looked across to Joshua. “She’s so desperate for him to settle down with someone he loves, she’s ready to invent someone. Honestly, I don’t think she cares who it is, as long as he’s happy.” Her head jerked back, and her eyes widened. “Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to imply anything about you.” She rested her hand on Holly’s arm. Holly chuckled. “Don’t worry, I know what you mean.” Stewart had lost that tension. She smiled at him. She was pleased, it didn’t suit him. He winked at her. Again, she had the feeling that they shared a secret. Not psychic but something like an understanding of one another. While Donna chatted to them, Stewart moved his hand along the kitchen work surface they were leaning up against. It was a casual move, but it meant that his hand was behind Holly’s back. It made her spine tingle, self-awareness stripping her bare. When she looked his way, their eyes locked. Everything about him was warm and inviting. Just the way he is, same as with Donna, she reminded herself. It was his way. After Donna moved on, however, they stayed in that position, neither of them breaking with it. The close proximity of their bodies meant that they were physically touching down one side. He probably didn’t realise, Holly told herself. Stewart nodded over at Josh, who was engaged in a conversation with his cousins. “If you were pretending to be my date to do me a favour, I’d make the most of it.” His thumb caressed her spine. He’d been aware of his position all along. Holly’s heartbeat tripped. “Now you’re being naughty.” “I’m being honest.” He lifted one shoulder in a shrug. “I’d take full advantage of the situation. Ideally we both would.” His mouth moved in a sensual smile. Holly simmered in response. The suggestive tone in his words made her stomach flip. Proximity made her think about last night, and how he’d made love to Joshua. How would it feel to have his body over hers, to have him handle her the way he had handled Joshua? As she allowed the fantasy to flit through her mind and senses, her lips parted and she stared into his eyes. Unblinking, he looked back at her, engaging with her and waiting for her response. With his sensual smile and his attractive physique, he was the epitome of sexual charm. And he was sure of himself, sure in every way. It was devastating. Holly took a quick sip of her wine then put her glass down lest her hand shook and she spilled it. She was about to brush off his suggestive comment, but before she had a chance to respond Josh wandered over. “You guys okay for drink?” “Yup,” Stewart answered, “and I’m taking good care of your date.” He was brazen. Josh, however, was startled. He looked at Holly, guiltily. “Sorry, did I leave you on your own for too long?” “No, not at all. Stewart’s winding you up.” “Right.” He gave Stewart a faux disapproving glance. “Come on, let’s go into the lounge. Some of the comfy seats have been freed up.” When they entered the room, Joshua’s mum cleared his younger brother, Kyle, off the sofa and urged the three of them to sit down. Kyle was the only one who didn’t have dark hair and Holly surmised he was the one who’d taken after dad. They perched in unison, and it struck Holly as rather funny, the way they were moving around as one, a little group of their own now with their own sofa. A friendly-looking grey-haired man entered the room a moment later, a bottle of wine in each hand. “This must be the lovely Holly,” he declared when he saw her sitting by Joshua, and headed over to top up her wine glass. “Oh yes, I can see why you caught his eye.” Holly mustered a smile. “When you moved in with another man,” Kyle interrupted, very loudly, as he squatted on a footstool, “we all thought you were gay.” Holly’s hand shook, the wine in her glass sloshing from side to side. “Oops, too full,” Mr Dawson said, apparently having missed Kyle’s comment. Did I imagine that, or did I hear right? That was Holly’s first reaction. Then she felt the discomfort in Joshua. She had heard right. She didn’t have to look Joshua’s way to see how stunned he was. Cautiously she lowered her eyelids and glanced at Stewart. Stewart returned her glance, lifting his eyebrows slightly as if to say “What the hell?” “Kyle,” Mrs Dawson admonished sternly. All three of them turned their attention to her as she told him off. “How many times have I told you not to wear your iPod when we have company, you have no idea you’re shouting with that thing blasting in your ears.” Holly stared in amazement. She’d thought Kyle was going to be told off about what he’d said, not his volume. Kyle removed one earpiece and made a big deal of it for his mother’s benefit, but Holly noticed that he left the other one in place. Mr Dawson, who was still hovering nearby, winked at Holly. “You’ve dispelled that rumour, Holly. Although I have to confess that when the three of you turned up together it reminded me of your Uncle Ted.” Mr Dawson directed the latter part of his comment to Joshua, and chortled loudly. Holly could tell Joshua didn’t have a clue what his old man was on about. What did he mean? “What was it you called it?” Mr Dawson asked his wife, as he continued to top up wine glasses around the room. “A polyamorous marriage?” “No, that’s not right.” Apparently unfazed by the turn of the discussion, his wife shook her head. “Your brother had one of those open marriages,

which basically meant if they wanted to, they could…you know,” her eyebrows went up and her eyes rounded, “invite an extra person home, if you get my drift.” “That was it,” Mr Dawson said. “Maybe we should have tried that, my love.” Mrs Dawson reached out from her armchair and gave him a sound slap on the arse as he passed, but her cheeks were pink and she was chuckling at the idea of it. Once again, Holly didn’t need to look at Joshua. The poor man was slumped back in the sofa, one hand to his temple, the other lifting his wine glass so that he could swig from it in an attempt to numb the confusion. When she glanced at Stewart, she had to turn away quite quickly, because Stewart looked as if he was about to laugh aloud. If he got started, so would she. “These three don’t look like Ted and his wife. They always had someone different tagging along, sometimes two.” She rolled her eyes. “These three look more like a…watchamacallit…a threesome.” Mrs Dawson rocked back in her chair, high heels lifting from the floor, giggling heartily. They think we look like a threesome. Holly stared into the room beyond to distract herself. It was a conservatory, and Donna and the friend who had been introduced as the bridesmaid were doing some kind of exotic dance demonstration that involved a lot of hip wiggling and laughter. It all added to the dreamlike quality of the moment. “I can see the wine was flowing long before we arrived, Mother,” Joshua declared, somewhat bitterly. “Oh, you’re far too serious about things, my boy,” she replied. “Always were. Where’s your sense of humour?” “Where indeed,” Stewart muttered under his breath, covered his mouth with his hand and laughed into it. Mr Dawson nodded sagely, as if his wife had made a good point. Holly dared not say a thing, because her stomach was tight with withheld laughter and poor old Josh was in an entirely different mood altogether. They were here to support him, but under the rather surreal circumstances that was virtually impossible.

Chapter Seven

“I’m so sorry about this,” Joshua stated, staring across the double bed at Holly. Holly gave him a comforting smile. “Don’t worry about it!” The bed had been made up for the pair of them, and Josh’s mother had only just left them alone in the room, after fluffing the pillows and arranging a heart-shaped cushion on top—an item that made Joshua frown heavily. “I had no idea she was expecting us to stay,” he added, “and she was so insistent there didn’t seem to be any way out of it.” There would have been a way out of it, she reflected, but it was up to Stewart to push it. Stewart, who had stayed on soft drinks in order to drive them all home, hadn’t argued. He was having way too much fun observing the situation. “She’s gone to a lot of trouble,” Holly commented, as she peered around the bedroom that Mrs Dawson had deposited them in, her curiosity baited. Mrs Dawson had done her best to set the mood for a romantic night in. The only light came from a small bedside lamp, but she was adjusting. It was Joshua’s old room and it still had a lot of his stuff there, including posters for blockbuster action movies and a selection of pin-ups of Madonna in her conical bra period. Mellow from the good company and the wine, she chuckled at the juxtaposition of big guns and breasts. Her attention retuned to Joshua. His eyebrows were drawn together, but he was studying her thoughtfully. His mood was uneasy but nothing like it had been earlier, when his brother had dropped his ‘gay’ bombshell and his parents had launched their shellshock commentary on his uncle’s sexuality and threesomes. The whole evening had been bizarre and she half expected Joshua to collapse in a state of nervous exhaustion, but he didn’t. In fact he seemed to be on another plane altogether. Something about having her alone in his teenage bedroom made him think about how it might have been had she walked in, back then. His reaction was flattering to stay the least—he was getting aroused. Holly blushed. “If I’m making you uncomfortable, I could get a taxi home.” “No,” he replied, hastily, “you’re not making me uncomfortable at all.” He smiled at her. That smile made her melt—always had, always would—and if anything it got to her even more since she’d got to know him better. Was there anything more attractive than a good-looking guy with a hint of vulnerability about him? Holly gave an inward sigh of appreciation. Right at that moment she wanted to walk around the bed that separated them, take him in her arms and embrace him. Actually, she wanted to do much more than that, but she focussed on the embrace part instead because it made her feel less of a lusty voyeur with a dirty little secret. She caught her lower lip between her teeth, becoming aware that she was a tad tipsy. “I wasn’t expecting the sleeping arrangements,” he said, “but I really should have guessed.” He scrubbed at his head with his knuckles, a mannerism that made him look cute and bewildered whenever he did it. “We’ll manage,” Holly replied. “It’s no big deal, really. We’ll see it through and you can sort the misunderstanding out next week.” She found herself gazing at his torso, outlined as it was in a fitted shirt, wondering what he’d look like as he took it off. She pictured him unbuttoning and removing it, wanting to see it, and her legs wavered under her. “You shouldn’t have to do this.” He spoke absent-mindedly, and stared across at her again. “I keep telling her we’re just good friends.” She sensed he was wondering why his mother insisted there was more to it. Was there more to it? His question echoed through her mind. His gaze travelled over her and Holly realised he was still aroused, much as she was. It wasn’t just the reflection on his teenage self that had done that to him. The arousal wasn’t going away. The wine had done bad things to them both, apparently. How tempting it would be to touch him now, she thought. To run her fingers over his body, to explore that beautiful cock that she had gained so much pleasure from through her secret psychic connection. An image of Joshua sprawling and naked in the bed flashed through her mind, thrilling her. Must stop, she warned herself, because her errant thoughts and desires could lead to a horrible mistake. She would hate to do the wrong thing and risk their friendship. She glanced at the heart-shaped cushion. If they fell into bed together, now, would she be in danger of snuggling with him while she was asleep —or worse, given that she’d had wine and felt horny—and would that be a terrible embarrassment to him? Just then the door clicked open and Stewart stepped into the room, a toothbrush still in its packaging held aloft in one hand. Mrs Dawson had thought of everything. Moving quickly Stewart gestured at them to stay quiet. He looked rather like a spy as he peeped back down the corridor before he closed the door behind him, and the action made Holly giggle. “What the hell?” Joshua lifted his hands in a gesture of disbelief, once Stewart had shut the door. “What if someone sees you?” “No one saw me. Besides, I could be calling by to borrow a pair of pyjamas.” There was humour in his expression and he winked at Holly. Something about the way he looked at her made her already-aroused body tighten with anticipation. He’d been flirting with her all the evening, and after what had been said about the three of them, there had been much more physical contact—a shoulder rub here, a jovial hug there, and a kiss on her cheek at bedtime. Now he stepped over to her side, as if he had no intention of leaving, with or without pyjamas. “You think I was going to miss the private party?” There was such a suggestive edge to his comment that the already simmering atmosphere turned electric. Holly stared at him. He had a brooding look as he observed them. Was it because of his muscular physique and his unashamed bisexuality that he looked so sexually self-assured? She had the feeling that he was holding back somehow. It was because of Joshua, because Joshua was finding his way with his sexuality. He was still flirting with her though. She swallowed. The room seemed even smaller than before, with the three of them in there alone together and surrounded by imagery of big guns and Madonna with her legs akimbo and her boobs popping. “Yes, we need to talk, but…” Joshua sighed. “What a mess.” “And whose fault is that?” Stewart responded, depositing his brand new toothbrush on the bedside table. Holly assessed them both. Stewart was in a provocative mood. Joshua, however, was allowing his emotions to get the better of him again. He stared across the bed at the pair of them. “You’d better go back to your own room,” he muttered vaguely. “What is my Mum going to think if she finds the three of us in here together?” He had a wild look about him and Holly could feel the confusion he faced. Once again she longed to take him in her arms. At her side, Stewart gave a wry laugh. “If they find the three of us together maybe they’ll think you’re having one of those fancy ‘polyamorous’ relationships that your family is so fond of.” Holly bit her lower lip between her teeth. The wine had definitely made this moment seem even crazy. Joshua’s jaw tensed. “That’s right, take the mickey why don’t you.” “Lighten up, for crying out loud,” Stewart said. Stewart was right. Holly knew that Josh would soon see the funny side of what had happened, given a bit of time. The comments that had been made had wound Joshua up even more than he already was, but it would fade. His glance flitted to her and she held her breath, hoping that he wouldn’t be offended by her amusement. Her mood seemed to level him, and he gave a deep sigh and rubbed his head with his hands. “That was unbelievable. Why didn’t they talk about all

that stuff years ago?” Holly breathed a little easier. “You didn’t know about your uncle’s relationships before tonight?” “Not a clue. I mean Uncle Ted always had a lot of friends around him, but I thought they were just that, friends.” “Like we’re supposed to be,” Stewart commented, with irony. “We are friends, aren’t we?” Josh bit back. Nevertheless, he seemed to have given up asking Stewart to leave. These things had to be said, perhaps, and the time was right. Stewart was all ready to spar. “Friends with benefits, huh, just like Uncle Ted.” “I’m not like him though, am I?” Josh was attempting to address the similarities, and the differences, and it was weighing him down. “Oh, yeah, right.” Stewart picked up the heart-shaped cushion and tossed it between his hands as if he was warming up for a game of rugby. “You’d love to analyse that one inside out and get yourself in a sweat about it.” The remark was meant to be teasing, but Joshua took it badly. “It’s just the way I am,” he muttered. “I worry about stuff. We can’t all be perfect like you.” Tension filled the atmosphere and Holly felt it swelling all the time—angst-laden, and shot through with the simmering chaos brought about by their mutual needs and desires. Stewart lifted his hands in the air. “Why the hell are we arguing?” “I have no idea.” Joshua glared at him. “Well, try to keep that thought in mind.” Stewart lifted an eyebrow. “I am the one who is waiting patiently here.” He threw the cushion back on the bed. Joshua reeled at that. He stared across the bed at his lover then turned away, lifting the curtain to stare out of the window into the night. Holly ached to comfort him. Stewart’s disappointment had hit him like a fist to the solar plexus. There was a building sense of self-resentment inside him and she couldn’t help herself. She stepped around Stewart, resting her hand on his shoulder briefly as she passed. He nodded at her, understanding her intentions. When she closed on Joshua she put her arm around his shoulders and drew him into her embrace. At first he was tense, then his resistance caved and he gripped on to her tightly. Affection and need poured from him and she felt her response rising. Drawing back she looked at him while she caressed his jaw affectionately. His expression was intense, dark and questioning, and he stared deep into her eyes. It made her want him, and her hips swayed dangerously close to his. With effort, she tried to put her own involvement aside for a moment and concentrate on his confusion about coming out to his family. “What you’re feeling is natural,” she whispered. “You’re worried in case they are sad that you won’t have a traditional family, but tonight showed us that they love you and they will love you whatever your situation.” He nodded. “You’re so right. It’s made me feel like a total idiot.” Holly could feel how much he wanted to kick himself. The yearning to reassure him had taken a hold of her. “I know you couldn’t just say it right there and then, not when your brother joked about it, but your parents weren’t offended when he did.” “That’s because they thought it was a joke.” “Did they?” She wondered if it was a no-smoke-without-fire situation. He eyed her thoughtfully. Assuming she’d got his attention, she pressed on. “You’re worrying too much, trying to gauge their responses ahead of time, and that means you’re throwing up all sorts of possible scenarios and putting yourself through the wringer over it.” He nodded, still looking at her with curiosity. “The most important thing is they care about you, and they are warm and accepting people. Even if it takes time to get used to the idea they won’t judge you because of it. Deep down you know that, even if you wish it were easier to get past the telling stage.” He shook his head at her, and his mouth had lifted in one corner. “How is it that you know how I feel?” “Oh, I…” Damn. Holly pulled away, aware that she must have said too much and got too close to exposing her own secrets. “You’re a sensitive person,” he added, “but I knew that already.” He was thinking back to the accident, and Holly was captured by his mood as he remembered the sound of her voice calling his name when he was out cold on the road. Holly let his experience fill her senses. Their attachment had formed then, because the sound had reached inside him, the concern in her voice triggering a connection. He’d always found her voice attractive, sultry and evocative, and it put him in a good mood in the mornings when they chatted. Holly, who knew none of this, had to fight hard not to react. “You’ve got a special way about you, Holly. You’ve put me in a better place.” He sighed, and it was relief he felt. He was lightening up, and Holly thanked the heavens for that. “Some of the things you said are so true. It’s as if you understand me…better than he does.” He shot a glance at Stewart, but it was a mild-mannered, humorous warning. She was about to gloss over his comment, when Stewart interjected. “You needed the feminine perspective, perhaps.” When she glanced his way she saw a man enthralled, a man inspired. The undertow of arousal that had tugged at them all was visible and simmering in him. His posture was alert to the point of being predatory. Something about seeing them together, talking in that intimate way, had affected him. Her heart beat erratically as he skirted the bed and joined them. “It is uncanny.” He cocked his head on one side. “Is it that intuition you were telling me about when we first chatted?” He’d remembered what she said, and that made Holly smile. I want him, that’s why. It was a crystal clear realisation, but so complicated in its implications. She felt as if the three of them were treading water that rippled with primitive forces—forces that shifted and carried them even while they tried to reach out and hold one another in the racing tide of life and meaning. At the same time the truth of his comment made her fret. She wanted to fight their connection. An overwhelming desire to come clean had her in its grip, and the age-old instinct to run, to protect herself and her sisters, reared up. She swallowed down her doubts. She wanted to embrace the closeness she felt for them both, not have it pushed away by her secret. “I’m a little bit psychic,” she whispered, not allowing herself the time to do risk assessment. It was becoming too much of a burden. The unnecessary guilt and suspicion was an obstacle she wanted to push aside. “A little bit psychic?” Joshua asked. “Please don’t laugh.” Joshua was intrigued. “Okay, but only if you explain what you mean.” “It’s a family thing, me and my two sisters…we’re all a bit psychic, in different ways.” Joshua’s eyes narrowed. “You’re sensitive to other people’s emotions?” “Something like that.”

Josh drew her into his arms and kissed her forehead, and it was him comforting her now. “I always knew you were special.” The pressure of his mouth against her skin triggered a visceral response, the sheer and forceful need for more of the same, physical contact that spanned top to toe and inside and out. Blinking back the raw lust, she whispered, “Thank you.” Josh laughed softly as he drew back, and she knew why. It was because he was glad the spotlight was off him for a moment. Had she inadvertently derailed his dark moment? Whatever the reason, she was glad of it, and she was glad they didn’t ask any more right then. She’d said enough. It was hard to get past the years of rigourous training to keep something secret, to protect yourself by hiding an essential part of it. Joshua sat down on the bed, and he wasn’t upset any more. The strange events of the evening had come and gone and, while she could tell he felt as if it was all too weird, the funny side had begun to strike him. She looked at Stewart, needing the anchor that he represented. He reacted quickly. With a nod in her direction he sat down on the other side of the bed and patted the space between Joshua and himself. Watchful, masterful, predatory—Stewart had been waiting. Holly was compelled to follow his silent physical instruction. Her chest tightened, while in the pit of her belly something hot and heavy unfurled. Perching on the edge of the bed it occurred to her that the airing of issues and secrets had peeled away the barriers, and now the three of them wavered together instead of apart, like reeds in the tide, rippling seductively along one another’s length. Mischief shone in Stewart’s eyes. He was the first to lounge back on the pillows, but Joshua soon followed, resting his hands behind his head as he stared up at the ceiling. Josh gave a relieved laughed. “What a bizarre night.” “I wonder if your mother thought we made an attractive threesome.” It was Stewart who made the comment, and it made Holly’s breath catch. “I wonder if she’d prefer that to me being gay.” Joshua responded. “You definitely worry too much,” Holly said. “I can’t think of a single more attractive woman to have a threesome with, can you?” Stewart said. Oh yes, there was definitely a decadent suggestion in those eyes, and Holly’s heart raced, because it felt dangerous and extraordinarily arousing for him to be edging this conversation along the way he was. It’s just a bit of fun to lighten Joshua’s mood, she reminded herself, but when she glanced Joshua’s way, he was also staring at her intensely. He was glad of the distraction, that’s what it was. No. He wasn’t fighting things anymore, because he’d decided there didn’t seem to be any point. Holly’s body brimmed with physical expectation. “I agree,” Joshua said, and he looked her over with a lingering stare. “I saw the way you looked at her when you were feeding her last night,” Stewart commented. Joshua’s mood had morphed, and it was curiosity and arousal that occupied him now. “Yes, I had the urge to kiss her.” Both men were staring directly at her while they spoke about her. It made Holly’s skin tingle everywhere. “Should you to be talking about me while I’m sitting here?” She laughed softly, feeling self-conscious but in a good way. Stewart put out his hand. “Come closer, join us.” The suggestive look in his eyes and the insistent tone in his voice made her hotter still. She swayed unsteadily then reached out and took his hand, moving to lie between the pair of them on the bed. Breathless with anticipation, she meshed her fingers together over her waist. As soon as she settled into place Stewart reached out and touched her. He ran the back of his fingers down the side of her cheek and lower, down her throat and around her right breast. It was a fleeting touch, but it made her arousal levels soar. “Comfortable?” As his voice grew huskier and more intimate, so his Scots accent grew more obvious. That made him sexier still. She nodded. He’d taken charge of this, but Joshua was happy with it. It was how their sexual relationship had evolved, and Holly knew that Joshua was anticipating what might happen next as much as she was. “Joshua wanted to kiss you last night, and so did I.” He traced one finger over her lips. “I know.” “Is it this special intuition of yours that tells you that?” “Maybe.” Stewart’s mouth twitched to one side. “Are we allowed to kiss you now?” Holly could feel Joshua’s desire growing. He wanted to see Stewart kissing her, and he wanted to kiss her as well. His approval turned her core to molten lava. Nevertheless, a shiver passed the length of her spine. Her body was keyed-up to the max. She managed to nod, her gaze on Stewart’s mouth. “I’d like that.” A moment later Stewart moved closer, then his mouth covered hers.

Chapter Eight

What followed was an explosion of withheld desires and emotions, their three bodies tangling together on the bed. Even while Stewart’s mouth covered hers, Holly felt Joshua approach. His hands reached for her just as Stewart’s had, his urgent sense of need entwining in her blood with her own. Awash with stimuli, Holly whimpered. Stewart was right. Joshua was attracted to her as well. She’d felt waves of it coming from him, but still it startled her that he wasn’t pulling away. She could feel his emotion and his desire, and he was not denying it. She rolled her hips from side to side as she felt them closing her in with their bodies either side of her. They felt and smelt so good. Cologne and musk filled her senses, and being locked between them that way gave her a rush the likes of which she’d never before experienced. Stewart’s hands roved all over her while his mouth covered hers. His kiss was overtly seductive, making her tremble with need. He stroked her lower lip back and forth with his tongue, sensitising her mouth before plunging his tongue into the damp heat of her mouth. His hands locked around her waist, then he cupped her breasts from beneath. Drawing his tongue back and forth over hers, his actions made her crazy. She clutched at them both, one hand on Stewart’s shoulder, the other meshing with Joshua’s fingers as he reached for her hand. Their psychic link flared, making images of all the things she’d secretly experienced flash through her mind. “If I am not mistaken,” Stewart murmured huskily as he drew back, “I see two very aroused people before me.” His eyes glinted, and his hand stroked up her thigh, easing the hem of her dress up. Holly scarcely had a moment to breathe, let alone respond, before Joshua was there, eager for his kiss. His fingers brushed against her cheek as he stroked her hair back from her face, tenderly. It was an inquisitive touch, and she turned towards him as she felt him silently question whether she was there for him, too, urging him on. Emotions danced joyously between them as his mouth covered hers. Holly felt his pleasure..He went on to kiss her cheek, her jaw and the soft skin of her throat. “You’re so gorgeous,” he whispered against her skin. “Meant to be enjoyed,” Stewart commented, and his voice was low and softly seductive. The atmosphere grew heavy with the scent of body heat and desire, heightening her awareness of their mutual needs, her blood pounding as the lure of the two men stole her away from reality. Hard male thighs pressed against her. They both wanted her, and the blatant hedonism of being with two lovers at the same time was almost too much for her to manage. Dropping her head back against the pillows, she felt giddy with arousal. “I can’t believe this is happening,” she murmured. “You don’t want to do this?” It was Josh, and his eyebrows had knitted together. “I do want to, I really do.” The confession stole her equilibrium and she became boneless, weak with desire but strong with the certain knowledge that they all wanted it to happen. With Stewart she just knew, and Joshua had no doubts, not now. Right at that moment it was the most alluring opportunity she had ever had and she craved every second of it. Stewart reached under her dress and stroked his hand over the mound of her pussy, plucking at her G-string. “You’re so hot…” His eyes bored into her. “Think you can take us both on?” “Oh, God…” Her head rolled against the pillow, the blatant question forcing her to state it aloud. “Yes, yes I want you both.” The knowledge that she had put the seal on it made her wild and provocative. “You have condoms?” Joshua asked, staring across her at Stewart, the urgency in his tone reflected in the hard rod of his erection pressing against her thigh. “I do, but slow down buddy. Let’s enjoy the lady.” Humour filled his tone. He reached beneath her left arm and unzipped her dress. He’d obviously been studying how it worked. Holly chuckled softly. She wasn’t wearing a bra and when she felt the dress loosening around her breasts, her nipples tingled and burned. He peeled the dress down and off. She lifted her hips to assist and when it was gone her hands instinctively went to cover her breasts. Whimpering softly when she saw their expressions, she removed her hands, baring herself, and gestured at them. “Your turn.” She’d been dying to see them naked, in the flesh and for real, where she could touch and hold them. After so many tantalising second-hand experiences it had become an aching need. Stewart didn’t need to be asked twice. He pulled his buttoned shirt over his head, not even pausing to undo it, his muscled torso rippling. He looked at Josh expectantly as he tossed it aside. “Your shirt for Holly’s knickers, that seems fair.” Josh flashed him a look that made Holly simmer. Waves of barely contained need filled the air around him, but in his thoughts he knew that Stewart was right, he needed to slow up and not make a fool of himself. She grasped for his hand, reassuring him, and when he met her gaze his mouth lifted at the corners, his eyes like chocolate. His free hand went to his buttons and as he undid them, Stewart ran his fingers along the band of Holly’s G-string, stroking side-to-side. Josh tugged at his shirt, getting himself in a tangle, but once he was stripped to the waist, he shot Stewart another glance and Holly gasped aloud as Stewart tugged her G -string the length of her legs and off. Adrenaline pumped in her veins when Stewart curled his fingers up and down the groove of her sex. “I want to taste you. I think Josh should too.” “Fuck,” Josh whispered. Holly’s breath hitched, a shiver going through her. Josh’s cock pressed harder against her thigh and she knew that he was aching to be inside her, to taste her and push his cock into her heat. Stewart, meanwhile, had dipped his fingers into her damp groove and stroked them over her clit. “Oh please,” she cried aloud, her body arching up from the bed. Stewart rose on to his hands and knees and lifted her legs apart, unceremoniously, climbing between them. Her bared flesh tingled. Embarrassment hit her, then he kissed the bare skin of her abdomen and she forgot everything except these two men. It was as if the bed had floated away into another reality and it was only the three of them that existed now. Stewart kissed and licked a path over the curve of her belly, teasing her skin, until he reached her pussy. He blew warm air over the sensitive skin, making her tremble. Then he kissed her mound, before thrusting his tongue into her wet groove. Moaning, she clutched at Joshua. “Christ, you taste good,” Stewart murmured, and lapped at her swollen clit. “Hold me,” she whispered to Joshua. Josh didn’t hesitate. He claimed her upper body, kissing her eagerly while he cupped her breasts, each in turn, a thumb teasing over each nipple. When she moaned, he ducked down and suckled her nipples, one after the other. Sensation looped from her mouth to her nipples to her sex and back, locking her whole body to the rough caress of tongues on her. Her hands closed around his head possessively, an orgasm looming close. “Joshua.” Stewart beckoned him over, moving away so that he could take up the position between her open legs. Holly grabbed him as he clambered over her, sitting upright to kiss his mouth. He returned her kiss, then put his hand on her shoulder and eased her down on the bed, determined to have the taste of her on his tongue. Where Stewart had cleverly teased her to the brink, Josh was like a starving man. He went straight to her entrance, thrusting his tongue inside and lapping from the moist, sensitive opening. While he did, his thumb ran over her clit, firmly, deliberately.

Her feet lifted from the bed. “Oh, lord!” She came. Her centre burned then throbbed wildly. He shoved his face close against her, bathing in her nectar, devouring her. Hot juices spilled into his open mouth. Overcome, Holly turned her face to one side. There was no chance to catch her breath. Stewart had risen from the bed and was opening his belt and zipper, watching Joshua suckling at her sex while he licked his own damp lips. Shoving one hand in his pocket, he pulled out several condom packets and dropped them on the bed before tearing one open. Joshua lifted his head. Stewart paused, arched an eyebrow and offered him the rubber. Joshua rolled free. “I want to watch you first,” he stated, his voice raw and urgent. Stewart’s mouth twitched at one side, and he immediately turned his attention to Holly. “Ready for me?” Her core clutched. Holly couldn’t respond in words, she wasn’t able to. Her feet moved flat to the bed, her knees lifting. She nodded. Shoving his jeans off, his cock bounced free. It was gloriously long and hard and ready. He rolled the condom over it in one swift manoeuvre. Holly couldn’t contain herself, she whimpered and writhed, her every nerve ending electrified with expectation. He climbed over her, and the hard rod of his erection pressed against her pussy Looking down into her eyes, he rocked his hips back and forth, letting her feel him. Sensation overwhelmed her, and at her side she felt Joshua urge his lover on silently, wanting to watch him with a woman, wanting to observe her in the throes of orgasm. She grappled for his hand, squeezing it. When she did, he took it to his lips and kissed it, gratitude swelling in his chest. Stewart ran his thumb over her tender, swollen clit, and her body just about lifted off the bed. Her clit burned, her core flexing rhythmically. He loomed above her, waiting. It was obvious what he wanted—to hear her say it, to have her beg. Undulating, she pleaded to him with her eyes. “Please, please…” He stroked her inner thighs and pressed his cock against the slippery lips of her splayed folds for several moments longer, until she clutched at him desperately, then he directed his cock to her and eased the crown inside—just the crown. Panting, she arched her hips to his, needful of his hard girth deeper. Josh mumbled words of affection and buried his face in the crook of her neck, kissing the damp skin there. Stewart pressed deeper. She put her hand against Joshua’s head, stroking his hair and holding him against her. Stewart gave her an inch more, then another, studying her expression while he did. “Please…” “It’s coming,” he replied, then ground his hips against hers, filling her to the hilt. Holly had to bite the back of her wrist to stifle her cries of ecstasy. Stewart moved in and out, sending waves of pleasure through her body. Instinctively her knees moved higher, anchoring him around his hips. “Oh, yes, that’s so good!” Joshua had rolled free to observe, stripping off his jeans and underwear as he did so. Then he knelt on the bed the better to observe them. Desperate for some measure of relief, he fisted his cock in one hand. When she looked at him, watching his fist move up and down the rigid shaft, pride and pleasure flared in him. Holly was startled at how much that meant to him. Her lips parted, her breath catching in her throat. “You’ve got another eager lover waiting. Can you take it?” Stewart asked when he caught her looking at Joshua’s erection. The man was outrageously provocative, continuously forcing them to acknowledge what they were doing and to state it aloud, while they were still finding their way. Clamping her sex around his length, she slapped his shoulder and flashed her eyes at him. “Stop asking stupid questions. I want Joshua inside me too and you know it.” Her face burned. But it was worth the embarrassment factor, because Joshua’s reaction was too good. His head sank back, a lusty groan escaping him. He watched her through narrowed eyes, his mouth open, his cock reaching in his fist. He was so ready. Stewart grinned. He rose up with his arms at full stretch, his shoulders gleaming in the lamplight, the muscles in his biceps standing out like skeins of thick rope as he worked her. It struck her then how easily he held himself, how thoroughly he used his fit physique to ride and pleasure them both. “Good?” he asked. “Mmmm, oh…oh. Yes!” A second orgasm was closing on her. His cock was rigid, his thrusts building speed all the time. “I want to make you come.” That much was obvious. “Bloody hell, Stewart, there’s no doubt about that, believe me.” She suddenly realised he’d been waiting to let loosely. He was focussing on her, holding back on his own pleasure. Nodding vigorously at him, she urged him on. Like a man unleashed he moved in deep, hard thrusts. Physically lifting her as he rutted her up against the pillows, his sheer strength and force stole her breath. Panting, she snatched at his shoulders, gripping on to them to hold steady. Her orgasm closed fast then flashed through her, making her body tighten, then grow limp. Her groin was suffused with heat, her clit tingling wildly. Damp heat surfaced all over her. On he went, until she was weak with pleasure and every time the crown of his cock kissed the neck of her womb an echo of it ran over her, her core in spasm, until she was almost too sensitive and she was ready to beg for mercy. Stewart groaned in response to her body’s grip on his and spurted inside her. An aftershock went through her. She heard the sound of a condom wrapper being torn and felt how much Joshua hated that his hands shook as he rolled it on. Filled with pent-up need, he was taut as a bow at their side, his balls high and primed to spill. Holly swallowed, hard, took a deep breath and braced herself. Stewart had barely withdrawn and Joshua was there ready to take her from him. Holly felt a rush of departure, then she was filled again. Joshua swore under his breath when her rhythmic movements sucked his cock deep inside. “Oh, Josh,” she whispered. Delirious with pleasure, she was swept along on a tide of sensation. He looked down at her with undisguised rapture, the lamplight casting light and shadow across his profile. Then he lay close over her, his arms enveloping her head, his mouth raining kisses on her face while his hips moved fast and deep against hers. “Feels so good,” he whispered, his voice tight with emotion. She felt how much he rued the fact that he was going to come quickly, but he couldn’t hold back. As he got close to his plateau he said her name over and over, and his hands moved down and around her bottom. He lifted her against him and ground harder still. His pelvis against her clit and folds massaged her to bliss and back while her cervix throbbed wildly on each point of contact, sensitised to the max. It kept her right there on a wave of bliss, multiple orgasms leaving her pelvis awash with heat and moisture. Then his cock stilled, then jerked repeatedly, and for several long moments there was ecstasy, and nothing else. Holly rolled with it, echoes of the multiple orgasms still rippling inside her, and when she finally came down to earth, it was the adoring kisses of both men that drew her back.

Chapter Nine

When Holly surfaced from sleep, it was in a bed warmed from lovemaking and slumber, her body enclosed by the two men who had taken her to ecstasy and beyond. Was it a dream? Stirring, she opened her eyes to the sight of Stewart propped on one elbow, looking down at her intently. Not a dream. It was morning, and the bedroom they occupied was brightening with light from a gap where the curtains didn’t quite meet. Stewart’s mouth lifted at one corner when he saw she was awake. It made her body flicker into life, rapidly. She went to greet him but he put his finger to her lips and shook his head. Nodding over her shoulder, he indicated that Joshua was still asleep. Holly listened and heard the sound of his deep, regular breathing at her back. She blinked her acknowledgement of Stewart’s message. His eyes glinted and he smiled as he ran his fingertips over her lips. Immediately, her body kindled in response. Waking with his naked body pressed so close against hers and Joshua on her other side made her senses swim. Images and sensations from the night before flashed through her mind, and she looked deep into Stewart’s eyes. She was willing to bet that he was thinking about the night before as well. When he lifted his fingers, it was to replace them with his mouth. The kiss was gentle, exploratory, but also possessive, and he ran the tip of his tongue along the inside of her lips. The action made her core flutter expectantly. She wanted him. She wanted them both—her body eager for more of the passionate exploration the three of them had shared the night before. Her head tipped back and her lips parted, inviting him closer still. His tongue stroked over hers, and that made her want to wrap around him, completely. When he eventually drew back, there was a serious expression in his eyes. “He’ll be a mess,” he whispered, “when he stops to think about it.” She nodded, and the knot of concern that she carried for Joshua got a bit bigger. Stewart observed her silently, while he trailed his fingers over her neck and down as far as the curve of her waist and hip. It was gently inquisitive. She cupped her hand around his shoulder, taking physical comfort from his sheer size and strength. There was something so comforting about lying there in his embrace. His body—so fit and strong—suggested security to her. The world wasn’t as simple as that, of course, but she allowed herself the moment to bask in his male strength and beauty, with the sound of Joshua’s stable breathing at her back reassuring her everything would be all right. Deep down she knew that this only complicated matters for Joshua. Even as she had fallen asleep in the early hours, resting between them in a haze of post-orgasmic bliss, she knew that the doubts were already crowding in on him. She also knew that he’d wanted it, wanted the three of them to make love, and he’d accepted that and all of its complications. Dealing with the fallout was what he wasn’t sure about. Then again, neither was she. Guilt weighed heavily on her. Had she led the situation? Had she influenced it and come between two lovers who were already struggling to come to terms with their situation without her becoming involved? Meeting Stewart’s gaze, she braced herself. “Perhaps I should leave before he wakes,” she whispered, “and give you two some space?” “No, that would be wrong. Besides, I don’t want you to.” Again he kissed her, and the passion in it made her wish the setup was different, that the three of them were in a private space, not in Joshua’s family home, where Stewart wasn’t even supposed to be in the room. She was the interloper here. “Thank you,” she whispered, as they drew apart. Stewart shook his head. Thank you, he mouthed. His gaze drifted over her naked torso. She didn’t need a psychic link to be sure of this man’s desires and motives. He put Joshua first, of course, but he was attracted to her and he obviously had no regrets. “We’ll muddle through the goodbyes then take it from there.” He glanced over her shoulder at his slumbering lover. “Josh tends to get subdued at first, when something is on his mind.” “On the outside, maybe.” She made the comment without thinking, and Stewart looked at her quizzically. Before she had a chance to respond, Joshua stirred at her back. Her last comment had woken him. She tensed, but Stewart immediately took control, reaching across to put his hand on Joshua’s chest, with her trapped between them. “Good morning, Stud. It’s about time you rejoined us.” His tone was light and teasing, and Holly tried to take the same attitude, smiling at Joshua fondly as he awoke. Her senses were, however, honed for his reaction to the situation—the morning after the night before and all its repercussions. Recognition flared in his eyes. Before he had a chance to say anything, Stewart continued. “So how do you feel, waking up with both a man and a woman in your bed. First time, right?” Holly wondered if that statement wasn’t a bit too provocative, but what she got from Joshua informed her that he’d quickly morphed from startled to aroused when he looked at the pair of them. He broke into a grin and nodded. “It’s damn hot.” Stewart moved closer against her side, reaching for Joshua’s growing erection, which he stroked. Joshua’s eyes flickered and narrowed, his mouth opening in a silent curse. One glance assured her that he was quickly growing harder still in Stewart’s grip. Holly could scarcely breathe. The intense pleasure of having a naked male body either side of hers carried her. When she felt Stewart’s erection growing against her hip, her pussy grew slick. The weight of Stewart’s arm across her body was incredibly arousing. He had her trapped there. The erotic tension swelled in the atmosphere, made tangible by their three-way dynamic. From under lowered eyelids she watched as Stewart’s hand wrapped around the girth of Joshua’s rigid cock. Joshua arched under his bold touch, pushing back into his pillow. “What would you like for early morning starters?” Stewart asked in a suggestive voice. “To be straddled by our beautiful companion, perhaps?” The bedroom felt too small to contain them. Joshua’s hands fisted at his sides and he groaned aloud as he gave Stewart a sidelong glance as if he could scarcely believe it. Stewart gave a long, audible sigh. “I’d love to see that, I have to confess.” Holly could feel Joshua’s arousal building by the moment, and hers along with it. “Or maybe you’d like her to kiss you, while I suck you off?” Holly squirmed, the suggestion making her hornier still. Joshua’s eyes rolled. “Jesus, Stewart. What are you trying to do to me?” Stewart gave a husky chuckle. Holly knew what he was doing—he was pushing all of them past the point of embarrassment on waking up naked in the bed with each other. It seemed like a good move, but things were about to get wildly out of hand. Her body thrilled at the idea of it. A loud knock at the door stalled the moment. “Joshua, Holly, should I bring you a cup of tea?” It was Mrs Dawson

Joshua sat bolt upright. “Oh, shit!” “Stay calm,” Stewart whispered. Holly rested her hand on his arm, trying to keep him steady. If his mother waltzed in, he would be more mortified than she would, Holly was sure of it. “Just say no thanks,” Stewart suggested in a low whisper. “Tell her you’re getting dressed and will be down for breakfast in a minute. That’ll fix it.” Joshua climbed out of the bed and strode towards the door. “We’ll be down to breakfast in a minute, just getting dressed. Thanks anyway.” “Okay love, kettle’s on.” Holly’s heart sank. Dismay swelled from Joshua. He stood barring the door for some time, one hand up against it. Mrs Dawson had long since gone. “For a moment there, I thought we’d got him to relax,” Stewart whispered. “We did,” she replied, but sadly that moment had gone. He gave her a subtle nod. “Come on, let’s get dressed.”

**** The Dawson family breakfast passed by in a mess of sidestepping awkwardness, much as it had the evening before, but without the alcohol to ease the discomfort. The only mercy was that everybody was on the go and breakfast was eaten on the hoof. Holly thanked the heavens that breakfast at the Dawsons’ wasn’t a formal affair. Crammed into the busy kitchen, she found herself standing next to Donna, the bride-to-be, sharing a plate stacked high with toast. “It was great to meet you,” Donna said. “I’m so sorry I didn’t have more chance to chat last night.” Guilt stole into Holly’s heart. She had no right to be here, it was an error. Now Donna wanted to get to know her. Even though she had clarified their status as friends, Donna obviously thought Holly was an important new fixture in her brother’s life. Meanwhile Holly thought she should back off and leave the two men alone. Joshua’s reaction when his mother had almost walked in on them had made her fret. The complications of her connection with Joshua were snowballing, and things were fast getting out of control. Donna was so close to her wedding. She had enough to think about right now. No wonder Joshua didn’t want to introduce the subject of his sexuality. Everything was becoming crystal clear for Holly. “I know you’re busy, and you have a lot of people to talk to.” “You have to come to the wedding,” Donna said as she reached for another piece of toast. “Mum invited you, right?” Holly shook her head. “No, that would be wrong, please don’t feel that you have to squeeze me in.” “Really, there’s plenty of room. A couple of family members have had to cry off. We have two places free, and we can’t cancel them now. It makes sense for you and Joshua’s flatmate to take them. Please.” Donna gave her a sunny smile and it was so reminiscent of Joshua’s that it made her feel even worse. How quickly this was getting away from her. She glanced across at Joshua, who was animatedly chatting to his brother Kyle in the hallway. But Joshua’s dad had overheard the conversation with Donna and he joined them. “Believe me, we’ve paid enough for those two places. Make an old man happy and fill the seats.” He beamed at her. Holly mustered a weak smile. Thankfully they seemed to take that as an acknowledgement and let her be. It would be churlish and almost cruel to deny them, and yet she knew it was wrong, it was stacking up trouble. How would Joshua and Stewart feel about it? She made it a priority to find out. Joshua had them saying their goodbyes and on their way inside forty minutes of emerging from the bedroom, which was pretty good going. The mutual relief the three of them felt at getting away without tripping themselves up meant that their journey back home was filled with good humour, to begin with. “Your face, when your mother knocked on the door,” Stewart commented, nodding his head at Joshua. “And I’ve never seen a stiffy vanish so quickly.” “Fuck you,” Joshua replied, but he was laughing. He glanced into the back seat, where Holly was sitting. She leant forward and put her hand on his shoulder. “Just be grateful she didn’t knock at the door a minute or two later.” She hadn’t meant it to sound quite so suggestive, but that’s the way he took it. He looked at her with desire in his eyes, but his laughter faded. He sighed, then nodded. She forced herself to bring up the subject of the wedding. “I’m really sorry, but Donna and your dad reiterated the wedding invite this morning, and they’ve more or less insisted that Stewart and I fill those places.” Stewart swerved the car rather rapidly as if he’d been distracted. He swore beneath his breath, but didn’t comment otherwise. She noticed that he glanced at Joshua, however. “I didn’t say yes or no,” she added quickly, “so just give my excuses and say I had something prearranged.” Joshua turned to her once more, and although his expression was troubled and his mood was heavy with mixed emotions, he smiled at her fondly. “You are a generous woman, and I appreciate that. Don’t worry, I’ll deal with it, you won’t have to go. I’ll explain the situation to my parents tomorrow.” Silence descended. Holly sat back in her seat. He really thought she didn’t appreciate the invitation. It wasn’t that she didn’t want to go to Donna’s wedding. In fact she had taken to the Dawson family, inevitably. She didn’t, however, want to make Joshua’s situation any worse than it already was. When they emerged from Stewart’s car, back at the flats, Joshua stood by uneasily. “Would you like to come to our place for coffee?” Holly sensed that he did want her to, but felt awkward because he didn’t know what to say. Regret swamped her once more. She shook her head. “Thanks, but I’m due at my sister’s place today, so I’ll catch you another time.” It was partly the truth. Mostly she wanted to give them all some space. Without giving him a chance to respond she kissed him on the cheek then left, with a casual wave in Stewart’s direction. Her gut instinct was to keep it light, but deep inside her something completely opposite was taking hold, something heavy and chaotic, and it had lodged itself there. Lust, doubt, guilt and—most of all—growing affection for them both. As she hurried away from them it occurred to her that she’d been barrelling along with the situation because of her psychic link, and now the consequences of her actions were beginning to form. I should have said no to dinner, no to the party and no to the sex. Nevertheless, she couldn’t bring herself to regret it. Her sisters always called her the sensible one. Now she began to wonder if she’d been selfish. Her eyes smarted. The thought that she might prove to be a fatal disruption in Stewart and Joshua’s relationship hurt most of all. They were meant to be together, and if she had endangered that she would never forgive herself.

Chapter Ten

Joshua stood in the shower, soaping his erection. His eyes were shut, and he’d positioned himself under the showerhead with the water pounding against his face as he tried to blank his mind. It wasn’t working. The image of Stewart climbing between Holly’s open thighs kept flitting through his mind, arousing him until his cock was rigid and his balls aching for release. He’d practically done a runner on Stewart that day. Retrieving his spare bike from storage, he’d cycled as far as the Sussex Downs in an effort to sort it out in his head, but even that hadn’t helped. He wanted it, that’s why. He wanted to relive every sexy moment. The way it had made him feel—torn, but deliciously so—as he watched and waited, the thrill of sharing a woman made even more absurdly deviant because of the fact he was in the bed where he’d had teenage fantasies about sex of all varieties, and he was in it with two lovers. He wasn’t even sure how the hell it had happened, the events of the early part of that evening a blur up until they had all three laid down on that bed, but it was impossible to forget what had happened then. He removed his hand from his cock and put both palms flat to the wall tiles. It felt wrong, jacking off in the shower while Stewart was out there waiting for him to come to bed. How ludicrous was that? Last night hadn’t felt wrong. It was damn confusing, but it hadn’t felt wrong. I love Stewart, how can this be? In just a few days Donna would be married and he could talk to his parents about his relationship with Stewart. He’d committed to that and he wanted it. It wasn’t going to be easy, but that was his goal. Not going to let Stewart down. Forcing his thoughts to the financial planning meeting he had to lead the following day, he turned off the shower and towelled himself dry. He needed to order a new bike too. His old bike was irreparable from the accident and the spare didn’t have the high spec he was used to nowadays. Reaching for his jockey shorts he put them on. As his hands moved over his hips, he remembered Holly’s touch on his body, her inquisitive fingers and her luscious mouth under his. Sleep. Perhaps sleep will help. When he walked into the bedroom, however, Stewart was on the bed, hands behind his head, waiting. His naked body gleamed in the lamplight. His muscled form looked almost painterly in the light, as if someone had touched it with light here and there, drawing the eye to his biceps and abs, and his powerful thighs. He wore it so easily, as if he was unaware what an Adonis he was. Once again Joshua’s blood surged to his cock, and he cursed silently. He moved quickly, heading for his side of the bed. He couldn’t pretend last night hadn’t happened, and he wasn’t ready for Stewart to be chilled about it. Each time Stewart had caught his eye that day, he’d had that calm, questioning look, the one that Joshua knew so well, the one that meant he was waiting expectantly for Joshua to say something. Joshua almost wished he’d get angry, pin him to the wall and shake an opinion out of him. Would it help? No. Stewart knew him too well. He’d tease him until he blurted out his feelings on the matter. He wished he had his lover’s sure nature. He wanted to be able to comment on it easily, but how could he? It had been unexpected, wild, and it had thrown him way off his set course. So instead of commenting, he sat down on his side of the bed and fiddled with his watch on the bedside table. “Do you want to talk about it?” Stewart asked, eventually. “No.” “Okay.” Stewart elongated the one word response, indicating his doubt. The silence in the air weighed heavily. Joshua attempted to ignore it and lay down on his side. Eventually Stewart shifted his position and turned so that he was almost against Joshua’s back, but not quite. “Any particular reason why you don’t want to talk about it?” “I’ll talk when I’m ready.” “In that case, get settled and I’ll spoon you.” Relieved that he wasn’t going to quiz him any further, Joshua let his head sink into the pillow. Stewart rolled closer and wrapped his hand round Joshua’s waist, fingers trailing on his abdomen. “And I’ll ignore this stonking erection you’ve got, shall I?” Shit. Joshua’s hopes for the temporary brainwash of sleep sank. Stewart nudged that erection with his forearm then gave a soft laugh. What the hell could Joshua say? Stewart had probably spotted it the moment he came out of the shower, and he would also know Joshua was lying if he said he wasn’t in the mood for sex. The irony of it was that thinking about the night before made him aroused, but his mind was not working in a way that was conducive to the kind of casual intimacy they’d had before. “I’d appreciate that,” Joshua responded grimly. It was pretty clear that Stewart was aware he was thinking about what had happened between the three of them the night before. What a mess, but he didn’t want to lose this man. Acting on instinct he grabbed Stewart’s hand and held it tight against his chest. “I’m sorry I’m such a fuck-up.” Stewart leaned in and breathed against Joshua’s neck, planting a kiss below his ear. The tender touch did nothing to rid Joshua of his erection. “You’re not a fuck-up. Take your time. It’s all new. Your life is about order and control, and this last year has been about change and about not being in control.” Why was it that he was so wise, and so calm? That’s what had attracted Joshua though, Stewart’s sureness about what he was and what he wanted. He wouldn’t let anyone judge him, but Josh was afraid of that. Joshua rolled on to his back, and met his lover’s gaze. “Is it any wonder I love you?” “I’m glad you appreciate me.” Stewart grinned. Joshua thought he was going to say something else, but instead he moved down the bed. Joshua’s body jolted. Stewart had taken the crown of his cock into his mouth and was gently kneading him between his balls with his knuckles. When he moaned aloud, Stewart lifted his head. “Don’t fight it,” he urged. Joshua was about to say he wasn’t fighting it, but he realised Stewart was talking about last night. His cock jerked in Stewart’s grip. Stewart’s eyebrows lifted and he gave a dark chuckle. Joshua pressed his lips together determinedly. Stewart responded by lowering his head and tonguing Joshua’s balls. “Thinking about last night huh?” he whispered, between moving sides. “Stop worrying about it and just think about how good it felt.” It had felt good. Don’t make me say it. Please. But Stewart forced him on with each stroke of his tongue, and when he took one ball into his mouth and cradled it, sucking on it all the while, and his cock reached, and reached, Joshua blurted it out. “Watching you with her, it…” He shook his head, denying how it had made him feel, but it was the truth. “It what?” Stewart sucked harder, his hand locked around the girth of Joshua’s erection, refusing to jack him off until he confessed. Joshua panted aloud. His release depended on Stewart’s will. “Damn it, Stewart, it made me want to fuck you both, and you know it!”

**** Holly gave a deep internal groan, and forced a smile. All afternoon she’d had bits and pieces filtering through from Joshua, but the connection had exploded into an overload of sensory stimulation that made her feel dizzy. At the best of times it was hard to bear, but she was currently in company and she was in danger of keeling over. She reached for the back of the nearby sofa and gripped on to it, trying to focus on what her sister was saying to her. “Okay sweetheart, you get settled in. I’d better go. Owen will have brought the car round to the front by now and Alec is holding the lift.” Monica embraced her. “Thanks, I appreciate this.” Holly took comfort from the hug. However, seeing her older sister with her current love interests did nothing to assuage her growing doubts and insecurities about what had happened with her and her neighbours. Monica looked radiant, and who could blame her for being that when she was dressed classy for a business function, accompanied by two dapper men in evening suits. Holly had met Owen briefly before, but she hadn’t met Alec. The two men were close and had been for some time. They were both bisexual and had approached Monica together. That was quite different to her situation, which had been brought about because of her psychic link, and she hated that. It had been hard for Monica, opening up to these two men, but they worked through it. Seeing them standing on either side of her sister when she had first arrived, casual and yet deeply bound together, made her doubt what she had done. Was it because her sister had a threesome that she wanted one? The new question added to Holly’s growing sense of unease. It also didn’t help that she was still able to channel Joshua’s emotions and she was now on the other side of the city. But it hadn’t happened that way, she assured herself. She hadn’t gone looking for a relationship with two men just because her sister had done it. It was only because of her psychic connection with Joshua that the event had become possible—inevitable even. Something that Monica had said about her relationship came to mind though. She’d said that when it came to her psychic ability two men with a bond of their own seemed to be able to handle what a single man might run scared of. Was that what appealed to her and made her want more? They make me want more. Monica picked up keys and jacket, pulling Holly back to the present moment. “Help yourself to whatever you need.” She stepped closer to Holly. “It isn’t helping much, is it?” Holly shook her head, resigned to her fate. “The connection is vaguer, but that just seems to make me reach for it even more.” She felt doomed, doomed to a life living their experiences second-hand. It had even more impact on her emotions now that she had been with them and made love with them both. Each secondary psychic contact was more tangible, because of her memories of the night before. It made her heart ache to be with them again, to experience that kind of intense three-way physical and emotional entanglement—that and more, to get to know them, properly be with them. It was so wrong, because they were a couple and she was just a diversion. “Let’s have lunch with Faye tomorrow. How’s that?” Monica was offering her the chance of support, and Holly was ready to take it. She squeezed her sister’s hand. “Thanks. That would be great.” When Monica had gone and she was finally alone, she flopped on to the sofa and shut her eyes, reaching out. I’m addicted to them. Even though distance had an impact, she couldn’t resist, she had to know. Don’t force me to say it. Joshua’s thoughts were in chaos, while Stewart kissed the taut hot surface of his erection, occasionally baring his teeth and pausing to ask him something. Holly couldn’t hear what he was asking, but she could guess the gist of it from Joshua’s response. Stewart was talking to him about their threesome, while torturing his erection with the briefest of touches. Holly’s reactions were playing havoc with her, putting her through the emotional mangle whilst fuelling her libido to overload. Breathless and weak with arousal, she pressed her head back against the sofa, keeping her eyes closed. In her mind and senses, the most powerful erotic show she could ever have known ran on, and in her heart the emotional chaos followed.

Chapter Eleven

“Yes,” Holly admitted, to her sisters the following day, “I somehow managed to make it even worse for Joshua because the three of us spent the night in bed together in his parents’ home.” Her sisters both stared across the table at her, their attention hooked. Monica, who had organised the rush meeting that Monday lunchtime, was straight in with questions, clarifying the details. “When you say you spent the night in bed with them, do you mean that you had sex with them?” Holly took a deep breath and nodded. She hadn’t meant to reveal it quite so soon after it happened, but it was playing on her mind and she needed her sisters’ advice. Joshua was concerned about his ever-increasing relationship and sexuality complications, and she felt guilty that she had worsened it. “So are they like…bisexual?” Faye asked the questioned carefully, looking at Monica, who had experience of such matters, then back at Holly with a surprised expression on her face. She obviously couldn’t believe that her two older sisters had turned out to be so wild. She was the free-spirited, arty one amongst them, and clearly thought it was she who should have such a wild life. “Stewart is bisexual, and Joshua is in a rather confused place at the moment, and I’m afraid I haven’t helped out.” Holly put her elbows on the coffee table and rested her chin on her hands. “He’s been building up to telling his family that he is living with a man, and now I’ve come into the picture and that has kind of muddied the waters for him.” Holly was getting both his thoughts about their relationship, and his emotions and desires, and they were severely in conflict. His head told him he was in a mess. Yet deep down he felt more at peace than he had in a while, as if a solid line had been drawn in his sexuality and the notion of being either straight or gay had been kicked aside, if only for a moment. Holly had felt him thinking it through in the night, admitting that he had wanted her as well as Stewart in his bed the previous night, and he wanted it again. Whilst his desire set tremulous anticipation simmering inside her, she couldn’t shake the heavy guilt she felt at knowing his every thought. Monica frowned. “It’s a complicated situation and I think you’re going to have to address one thing at a time.” Monica considered her carefully. “What’s the worst of it?” “The guilt about the psychic connection. Hands down. It makes me feel I can’t talk to them properly, because it becomes obvious I know so much.” “Joshua doesn’t know that you have any psychic connection?” Faye was amazed. “It’s been really hard, hiding it. That’s the problem. I think I need to tell them.” Holly sighed and studied Monica. “Was it hard, when you told Owen and Alec?” “Incredibly so, but when a relationship has already been formed, they are forced to take it seriously. We’ve always been afraid to tell people, that they would ridicule us or turn away, but it’s different when it’s someone you have grown fond of.” Monica paused, her expression meaningful. “And it’s obvious that you are fond of them.” Holly nodded. She pulled her leather jacket close over her uniform and glanced at her watch. She had an extra hour after lunch, where a patient had cancelled, and she was giving serious thought to going over to Stewart’s gym and trying to talk to him about it. Logic told her that was the best way. “I’m going to tell them, soon.” The youngest Evans sister, Faye, stared across the table at her older sisters and shook her head. “So that means you’ve both gone back on everything you always said you wouldn’t do,” Faye stated sternly, “and you’ve started telling people about your psychic abilities.” “Sometimes you can’t avoid it,” Holly explained. For years they had stuck together on that point. “Telling other people about our abilities is dangerous, but when you get close to people and your psychic skills are involved, there really is no way around it.” “We’re adults now,” Holly added, “and if we want to have serious adult relationships we have to let people know all of what we are, including that hidden aspect.” Monica, who was preparing to leave the country and utilise her psychic ability in her new job, nodded. “Holly’s right, when it’s about someone you love and the psychic thing is becoming a barrier to you having a proper relationship with them, you have to find a way to make it work. You have to trust them.” “I suppose I can understand that, because I can see what it’s done for you, sharing that part of your life with your boyfriends.” Faye had a wistful look in her eyes. “And the fact you are going to use your skill as part of your job in future is making me have a serious rethink about my work.” “What do you mean?” Holly asked. Faye shrugged. “It’s three years since I’ve graduated with a degree in Fine Art and I’m still working in a shop. Short of retraining in interior design or something, I don’t see how I can use my artistic skills to earn a living. I started thinking that maybe I should consider other options and maybe use my ability in some way.” Holly tried not to react too quickly, thinking it through before she responded. It made sense. Of the three of them, Faye had always had the most viable skill, from that point of view. Her psychic ability enabled her to communicate with the spirits of those who had passed on. “What do you mean, like those psychics who do TV shows and take members of the audience to work with them?” Holly asked the question tentatively, because the thought of Faye putting herself out there so much sent shivers through her. Faye shook her head. “No, nothing like that. I’m thinking people quite often live with ghosts in their homes and what bugs them most of all is why they are there. So I could offer a service to help people come to terms with why the spirits exist in the world by acting as a kind of go-between.” Monica gave a cautious nod. “It sounds like an exciting proposition. Do you think there’s much chance of earning a living through it?” Monica had the most high-powered job of them all and took home a good salary. Faye shrugged. “I haven’t a clue. I don’t know how much work there might be until I try. I’m getting in a rut, you know. I want to get out there and meet different people.” She looked from one to the other of her older sisters, both of whom were now involved in complex physical and emotional relationships with men, despite their psychic ability, something that the three of them had sometimes doubted would ever happen. Faye was the most flirty and outgoing of the three of them, and yet she was single. Her years at Art College had led to her being more of a party girl than her older sisters, and her psychic skill was something that didn’t really bother her unless she happened to be in a place where spirits resided. “I guess you could give it a try. Maybe go part-time in your current job until you find out how much work there might be.” Holly offered the compromise because she could see that Faye was straining at the leash, looking for a change. Monica’s change had done her a lot of good, and she was about to launch into a whole new world of opportunities. Perhaps they had all been too cautious with their psychic skills, Holly considered. Would sharing her secret talent with Stewart and Joshua change the situation, and in what way? Would it make things easier for Joshua, who was struggling to understand why she understood him so well, or make things worse? There was only one way to find out.

**** The last person Stewart expected to see walk into his gym that afternoon was Holly, but when he saw her enter through the double glass doors and glance about the place his day got a whole lot better. He’d been brooding about everything that had gone on. Joshua he could handle. Besides, Josh’s resistance to the natural chaos of life was crumbling. Stewart hadn’t, however, liked the way Holly had taken off on them the day before. She’d closed up on the journey home, and he’d regretted that he hadn’t had a chance to talk to her. He glanced at his watch. Luckily his current session was almost at an end. He nodded at his client. “Five minutes on the bike to cool down and you’re done.” The man on the cross trainer grunted his thanks and wilted to a halt. Grabbing his clipboard, Stewart signed the client off for the day and looked back towards the reception. Holly had paused at the desk and leaned up against it with her hands while she spoke to Daryl, who was currently manning the entrance. After she’d spoken to him she nodded her head in Stewart’s direction. When their eyes met there was an instant connection, something that tugged at his gut and made him want to hold her. He signalled Darryl to let her in. As he watched her making her way through the equipment towards him, his whole mood lifted. Could he wish for a sexier visitor? The fact that she wore her dental hygienist’s uniform made it even better. The tight-fitting dress had always turned him on, and now that he’d got his hands on what was underneath it, he felt as if he was at liberty to appreciate it openly. It was cinched at the waist, zipped diagonally over the breast and outlined her figure perfectly. There was something incredibly sexy about it. She had her hair up and tightly clipped at the back of her head, which made her look severe but powerful She also had high heels on, and a black leather jacket over the dress emphasised its sharp look. The dress ended right above the knee. Whoever had designed the outfit was thinking of ways to distract the patient from having their teeth poked at with sharp instruments, obviously. It would definitely work on him. She could poke at his teeth all day long if she looked like that. As she walked through the gym, she glanced about as if curious, then focussed on him, observing his appearance in gym gear as she approached. “Holly, this is a surprise.” “I hope you don’t mind me calling by.” “No, far from it. How did you find me?” “Body Torque.” She smiled, and the look that flitted through her eyes was damn sexy. “You mentioned the name of the gym. It was easy to remember.” “In that case I’m glad I mentioned it.” Unable to hold back, he ducked in to rest a quick kiss on her mouth, stroking her upper arm as he did so. What he really wanted to do involved full body contact. I want this woman. It struck him soundly inside a heartbeat. He wanted her. As much as Josh? His conscience prickled uneasily. It was too soon to make grand decisions. He was in danger of torturing himself the way Joshua did, and there was enough of that going on. For now it was her happiness that concerned him, and her expression had grown serious again after he kissed her. “Are you okay?” Her glance flitted about. “I had to speak to you, on a couple of counts.” That concerned him. The way she’d taken off the day before had made him wonder if she’d regretted what had happened between the three of them, and that in turn made him wonder if they would see her again. When he’d said as much to Joshua, it had made Josh even more angsty. “I’m glad you came. I was planning to check on you tonight.” She smiled and nodded at that. “Is there somewhere a bit more private?” “Of course. We can go to my office.” He put his hand around the back of her shoulders and directed her towards the glass cubicle at the far end of the gym space, where they could get some privacy. “This place is a terrific idea,” she commented as they walked, “a gym inside a city shopping arcade.” “It works well. It’s small but it suits the clients. We get a lot of guys come in while their girlfriends and wives are shopping.” “I can see how that would appeal. And this is where you met Joshua.” “It is.” Had Joshua told her that? He didn’t remember it being mentioned. Once inside the cubicle he shut the door and took her into his arms to kiss her. She didn’t resist. They could still be seen from the gym, and the embrace was too brief for his liking, but he had to touch her. Her body yielded against his and her lips parted as she returned the kiss. Sensuous, heated, deliberate—she wanted the fleeting contact as much as he did. When he drew back he stroked his thumb over her cheek. “So good to see you.” “I had to come.” For a long moment they held that pose and stared into each other’s eyes, and Stewart knew he’d never wanted any woman as much as he wanted her. Whether it was because the attraction went three ways, or was simply down to the fact that Holly was Holly, he had no clue, but he knew now and that was all that mattered. It was so hard not to keep her in his arms. He offered her a seat. She shook her head. “No, thanks, I’ll stand. I can’t stay long. I have a client in an hour and it’s going to take me forty minutes to get back to the clinic.” Shame, he thought, because he wouldn’t mind spending the entire afternoon with her. The memory of what had happened between them, the three of them, was all too fresh and all too stimulating. Holly wore a serious expression, which helped him focus. Her usually cautious manner seemed even more intense, as if she was weighed down by whatever it was on her mind. “Go ahead, I’m listening.” She took a deep breath. “First of all, I wanted to ask you if it was a mistake, what happened between the three of us on Saturday night?” So, she had run scared. She was direct about her concerns though, he liked that. “No, no way. You don’t believe that, do you?” The tension in her expression lessened. “I have no regrets at all,” she responded, with no hesitation whatsoever. She’d thought about it. She was sure of her words and that deepened his admiration for her. He smiled. “Good. We both had a great time that night. For Joshua it came at an awkward time and he’s confused, but he doesn’t regret it and neither do I. Far from it.” He allowed himself to remember some of the details. As soon as he did, he wanted it all over again. “I’m concerned for you and Joshua,” she continued. “I don’t want to…to come between you, if you see what I mean.” Her cheeks flushed. Her choice of words made him hard, his thoughts running through all the different ways they could make that happen, physically. He shook his head. “If anything, you made him lighten up about his family concerns, at least for a little while.” He gave her a wry smile. “Josh likes to stress. I figure it’s a side-effect of being a financial analyst.” “You reckon that’s why?” Her eyes twinkled. “His family seem much more relaxed.” “Yes, it’s a pity he’s not a bit more like them. Mind you, the last few months have been a big turnaround for him. I always knew I was bi, right from puberty, but Josh never even considered the fact he might be attracted to a man until this year.” “It is a lot to come to terms with, and I’ve added to the confusion, haven’t I?” Her lovely mouth turned down at the corners. “Maybe, but not in a bad way. At least I don’t think so.” It was the honest truth. Holly’s involvement had made Joshua less fixated on his grand announcement. Even though he’d spent the day before subdued and preoccupied, it was better that he was thinking things through, rather than being blinkered and set on a path. Josh couldn’t hide the fact that the event with Holly had aroused him, and still did afterwards, neither of them could deny that, but when asked directly he said he didn’t even want to think about it until after the

wedding was out of the way. To Stewart that indicated he needed the space and time, whereas previously he’d wanted to get his big announcement done and over with and it was the waiting that was getting to him. “There’s something else I need to get off my chest.” She lifted her chin. “I’m afraid this might make things even more difficult, but it has to be said.” There was more? His curiosity was fully engaged. “Go on.” “You know I mentioned I was a bit psychic?” The look in her eyes pleaded with him to take it seriously. “I’ll be totally honest with you, I wasn’t quite sure what you meant.” “That’s what I thought.” She clasped her hands together. “I need to explain. It’s only fair.” “Go on.” “Up until recently, my psychic ability was about sensing moods, character and events that were soon to happen. My older sister, Monica, she’s different. She has a gift called psychometrics. She experiences the history of something when she touches it, specifically sexual history.” “Seriously?” That was some weird ability. He found it hard to imagine. “Yes, seriously. Luckily she’s got a great support network these days.” She smiled, but it faded as she continued. Her brows drew together and she watched his every reaction as she spoke. This was important to her, and he concentrated on what she was explaining, wanting to make this easier on her than it seemed to be. “When Joshua had the accident, my psychic ability became locked on him. I have no idea why, but after I left his hospital room I felt the emotions and sensations he felt and when his emotions were stirred, I could see and feel what was going on, even though I wasn’t in the room with him.” Stewart stared at her. The thing about the sister was mind-boggling enough, but this was something else. Then he recalled what she’d been like, how concerned she’d been when they arrived at the hospital and she’d gathered them in the corridor while she told him and Joshua’s mum about the accident and what had gone on afterwards. At the time he’d thought she was just fretting, and he was in such a state of concern himself that he appreciated her presence and her ability to explain exactly what the hospital staff were doing for Josh. She’d talked about the pain, and the fact that they had medicated him and he felt better. “You felt his pain.” It was more of a statement than a question, but she nodded. “Yes. And I felt his relief and pleasure when he saw you and his mum walk into that hospital room.” “That’s incredible.” “Tell me about it. It has been weird for me, and the thing is it doesn’t seem to be going away fast. Although…it’s not about pain now, thank goodness.” She studied him closely. For a moment he wondered if it was a figment of her imagination, but she was one of the most grounded women he had ever met, and he couldn’t bring himself to entertain that thought for long. “Do you believe me? I mean, some people wouldn’t believe it.” “It’s not easy, but I know you’re not winding me up.” “Good. Bear with me then.” She gave a weak smile. “I can now sense Joshua’s emotions, and his desires. I knew that he wanted me as well, on Saturday. That’s why I was happy for it to go ahead, even though he was stressed at the time, because I knew he was…up for it.” Again colour marked her cheekbones. He’d be a fool not to be up for it. Stewart couldn’t help wondering about it though. Joshua was his own worst enemy. She looked at him as if she was thinking about their three-way as well. Her lips parted and her eyes flickered. She looked so sexy and yet somehow vulnerable, perhaps because of her confession. All Stewart wanted to do was hold her. He glanced over his shoulder into the gym to check on the status, in order to distract himself from the growing urge to take her into his arms. “Sorry,” she added, “I know this probably all sounds mad to you. I don’t blame you for being sceptical.” He turned back to address her. “It does sound mad, but I’m listening.” He winked at her, attempting to lighten the moment. “Not everything in this life is easily explained. Is it something you can prove?” She thought about it for a moment. “Yes.” She glanced away as if she felt awkward about it. “Yesterday, after we got home and I left you, Joshua headed out on his bike for the afternoon. He tried to clear his head, but couldn’t manage it. Later, after he’d been in the shower, you were waiting for him in the bedroom.” Tension ran down his spine. “Yes, that did happen.” She lowered her voice to a whisper. “You went down on him.” Stewart froze. It was uncanny. It was also hugely stimulating to hear her mention it as if she’d been standing in the shadows watching. “Are you sure you haven’t got the place wired, like some sort of hidden camera setup?” She took a deep breath. “That’s the kind of thing I would expect you to say, something I prepared myself for. It’s a normal reaction.” She drew away. “I won’t take it personally.” Had he hurt her with his off-hand remark? That wasn’t his intention “Sorry. It’s my way to be light about stuff. I didn’t mean to sound offensive. It’s just really strange.” “Tell me about it. This isn’t something that has ever happened to me before. Not so intense, so specific.” He was trying to quell the urge to kiss her. She looked so deliciously aroused and secretive as she whispered what she’d seen. It made him want to shag her while he forced her to tell him everything she’d ever seen. The bizarre fantasy took root somewhere at the back of his mind and his blood continued to head south as a result. He forced himself to concentrate. “I’ll be honest with you, I’ve never believed in psychic ability, and I’ve never met anyone who has. On the other hand, it makes some sense, especially about the way things developed. I could tell you two had become closer. I thought it was just because of the accident, but now I’m getting a different angle on it.” He recalled Joshua saying that it was amazing that she knew him so well, and she calmed him too, because of that. “It’s hard to come to terms with. I’ve never believed in psychic powers…” he paused. She didn’t seem surprised by that. “Do you think Joshua senses anything unusual?” Her concerns seemed to be mainly for Joshua. Why had she come to him? “No, he would have mentioned it. I know he felt close to you because you were there for him. If you have a connection, maybe that’s why.” “Yes, I wondered about that when I came over for dinner on Friday.” “He’s got a lot going on at the moment, as you know.” “That’s why I came to you with this. I had to get it out in the open but I thought you’d know when to explain it to him, and how. It’s important to me that it’s not a secret anymore.” That made sense. He nodded. “All of it,” she added, “I want you both to know, that I sense it when he wants you, I feel it when he’s with you.” She took a deep breath. “I experience it when you two make love…ever since he came home from the hospital.” Stewart was just about to ask her to run that by him again, when her meaning fell into place. He scratched his head. “This is going to take me some

time to get used to.” Her cheeks were redder still. “I can’t seem to stop it, honestly, I’ve tried.” Stewart cast his mind back. They’d been intimate at least twice since Joshua’s collarbone had mended, and that was before the night with Holly. He recalled how wired she’d been when they’d been on that bed together, how she’d commented on Joshua watching them, wanting them. “Do you want to stop it?” “Yes and no. It feels wrong. I feel like an intruder. But it turns me on, and I love to experience his desire for you. It made what happened between the three of us incredibly arousing for me.” Her gaze travelled over him, as if she wanted to be back there. They’d all enjoyed it, he knew that was a fact and any one of them who denied it was a fool, but if she kept looking at him like that while thinking about it, he’d have to have her. He laughed. “I don’t even begin to understand it, and it’s turning me on.” The fact he’d laughed seemed to relax her. She gazed up at him, and the look in her eyes was warm and affectionate. “I’m glad you haven’t run away screaming about the mad woman in your office.” “No way. I’m much more likely to ask you for more. In fact I can’t think of anything better than having you tell me what Josh is thinking while we touch him, together.” Her eyes flashed and her smile grew. “You’re a very bad man. I have to go advise people on dental hygiene and you’ve put that image in my head.” “I’m not going to find it easy to work myself. I’ve got a raging hard-on, and that was brought on by your presence, even if you hadn’t hit me with all this psychic sex stuff.” She gave a breathless chuckle. Again her gaze travelled over him. She was turned on too. It made him want to ignore the fact there were twenty men out there who could see what happened in his office, and shag her over his desk. He needed to touch her. Something was going to have to give, that was for sure. “What?” he asked, moving closer, diminishing the gap between them. “Oh, I was thinking you are even hotter, dressed in your gym gear.” It was hard, so hard not to grab her against him. “I’ve been thinking the same about you and your uniform.” He ran his hand down her upper arm. “In fact, if this wasn’t a glass-walled office and the need to be professional didn’t prevail, I’d have you in my arms right now.” He clenched his jaw in an attempt to hold back from doing just that. “I’d be holding you right against me, so that I could feel every ounce of your body with mine.” She took a deep intake of breath, and he could see she was unsteady. Her eyes flickered, her lips parting. When he glanced down at her chest, her breasts lured him, because her chest was rising and falling more rapidly. Everything she did just made him harder, made him want her more. He stepped in front of his desk and put his hand flat on it. “Sit here.” After a moment’s hesitation, she sidled over and perched on the desk in the place he’d indicated. When she looked up at him, her eyes were bright with arousal. He glanced over his shoulder. If anyone looked their way from the gym itself, they would only see his back. “I have to touch you,” he whispered, reaching for the zipper on that sexy outfit of hers. “Just for a moment.” Her hands moved to grip the edge of the desk either side of her hips, and her upper body swayed towards him. She wanted to be touched. That made him uncannily happy. He tugged the zipper down. The sound of it made his nerves feel ragged. Inhaling deeply, he folded the lapel back. Inside her dress he could see the shadowed dip between her breasts and the black-laced edge of her bra. What he really wanted to do was make love to her, right there on the desk, with her skirt up around her waist and her breasts lolling out of that tight uniform and bra, but a quick fondle was going to have to do for now. Pushing the flimsy fabric aside, he slid his hand inside the cup of her bra. She was so soft, and when he stroked her nipple it responded instantly. Her lips parted and she sighed. He locked eyes with her. Her eyes flickered. It was as if she was requesting he understand her. He would try. Exploring her that way made him want it all. “Going to have to see you tonight, need to be inside you.” Concern flitted through her expression. “Both of you, yes?” “Of course. I wouldn’t have it any other way.” Again he stroked his thumb over her nipple. She panted aloud, her eyes squeezing shut. He shook his head, ruefully acknowledging the burden he’d created for them both. “If I don’t stop now I won’t be able to stop.” Moving his hand, he cupped her whole breast. He held her for a second longer then eased his hand free. Aching for more, he stared down at her. She met his gaze, and he felt odd, as if he was on a precipice, wavering. A moment later, she caught her breath and gave him a rueful glance. “You’ve made it even worse on me now, I’m so turned on.” He pulled her bra back into place, zipping up her uniform. Regret swamped him. He wanted to do more, but he pushed the selfish needs aside, thinking of Josh. “I don’t want you to forget what I said about tonight, that’s why I did it.” “Oh, I won’t.” As she left the office, he gave her a pat on the behind. “Stewart.” When she glanced back, she smiled. It felt good to have put that look on her face. She’d looked as if a huge dark cloud hovered over her, while she’d expressed her concerns. The fact that she was leaving his gym with a smile made him feel like he could pump iron solidly for the rest of the shift—in fact that might be a necessity. He escorted her through the gym. She paused by the double doors that led to the outside world. “Promise you’ll talk to him, make sure he understands and he’s okay with what I said?” “I will.” “I’ll stay away until you’ve talked about it. But…if he doesn’t want to see me again because of my…my added complication, I’ll know.” She forced a smile. Would she really know? Stewart couldn’t get to grips with the depth of her connection, but there was no doubting she had a really strong handle on Joshua and his emotions. “Don’t worry, really.” He knew it was an empty statement, but he had to reassure her. He had no idea how Joshua would take it, and she was going to worry anyway. He ducked down to kiss her cheek. As he watched her leave he tried to imagine Joshua saying he didn’t want to see her again. If the little masochist did that, he needed some sense shaking into him. Stewart hoped it wouldn’t be necessary. Even stress-and-drama boy knew when he had a good thing going on, surely? Joshua just had to learn to accept life’s gifts as well as its trials, without question. Watching the swing of her hips as she disappeared out of the mall, Stewart figured Holly was the best gift they could ever have wished for. He just needed Joshua to accept that.

Chapter Twelve

“You have to be kidding me, psychic powers?” Joshua was dubious. “No, not kidding.” Stewart didn’t even have a hint of a tease about his expression. Joshua tried to make sense of it. When Stewart had sat him down at the kitchen table with a beer in order to talk, his mind had run through all the possibilities. Never in a thousand years would he have guessed he’d been about to announce that about Holly. That was the sort of cookie nonsense he’d expect from someone much more ditzy. “She came to see me at work today,” Stewart said. “At first I thought it was because of what had happened between the three of us…” Unaccountable jealousy surged through Joshua. Why had she gone to Stewart? “But it wasn’t,” Stewart continued. “Well, not really. I mean, she mentioned that too.” Joshua’s lips tightened. He stared across the kitchen table at Stewart. When Stewart didn’t add any further comment, he forced himself to ask. “What did she say?” “About Saturday? Not a lot. I wondered if she’d done a runner on us and she had, but not because of what had happened. She doesn’t regret it.” He paused to let that sink in. “It was because of this other thing, the psychic link she has with you. She feels it’s something we need to be aware of, because…she says…it’s what has drawn us together.” Joshua couldn’t take it in. Psychic powers? The concept sounded way too weird for Holly. A woman like her was far too grounded and practical, surely? To him she embodied serenity and quiet confidence, a beautiful, sensible woman. But maybe that’s what having psychic powers did for a person. Who was he to judge? He didn’t have the first clue what to make of it. Stewart sat on the other side of their kitchen table, observing the reactions while he dropped his bombshell and afterwards, while Joshua went through various stages of disbelief. Stewart had his feet very much on terra firma and he seemed to believe it. He’d had longer to mull it over though. Joshua sighed and lifted the bottle top that sat on the table between them and spun it, watching it as it turned and eventually fell flat to the surface. “It makes sense of a lot of what happened,” Stewart commented. He was trying to force a response out of him, Joshua knew that. He wasn’t ready. He’d gone from initial denial to subsequent silent consideration of the facts, and he still wasn’t sure how to react or what to say. His gut response was that it just seemed like another element of his life that was beyond his control and understanding. “Doesn’t it?” Stewart added, pressing him. Joshua nodded. “I guess so.” It did make sense of what had happened though, and he’d felt closer to her, that much was true. But nothing like that, not inside her thoughts or whatever it was that she experienced. It was eerie. He was baffled. “And you say she’ll know what I’m feeling now?” Stewart nodded. “If you have an emotional response, she will.” He coughed, clearly trying to be serious about the subject and not completely succeeding. “Let’s face it, you are aren’t you? Having an emotional response, I mean.” Joshua shrugged dismissively. “I guess.” “Well then, she knows. That’s what she said, highs or lows of emotion.” “That’s weird.” Joshua rubbed his hand over his hair. He kept thinking back to the night at his parents’ home and the strange way it had unfolded, how she’d known him so well and how she’d held his hand while Stewart made love to her, as if she knew what he felt and how turned on he’d been. Stewart watched him intently. Joshua had never seen him attempt to be this serious, not even when they’d first argued about coming out as a couple. That was still hanging in the atmosphere between them, an act that had to be done to prove how much Stewart meant to him. Stewart was being patient, but Joshua was aware of that patience running thin. And now this. Joshua sighed and grabbed his bottle, taking a swig of the cold beer. “It’s unreal, the whole thing is just unbelievable,” he said as he put the bottle down. “We could go over there and ask her to tell us more. Proof would help us both.” Stewart seemed to brighten as he offered the suggestion. The thought of being near Holly again made Josh want something entirely different than a heavy discussion. He wanted to lose himself in hot sex, to be surrounded by deviant possibilities that took him into another plane. As he looked across the table at Stewart, tension built inside him. Is that what Stewart was after too, a sexy female shag to take his mind off the presence of way too many issues in their lives? Anxiety hit Joshua like a stranglehold on his throat, and he snapped. “Is that all you want to do if we go over there, get proof?” Stewart lifted his hands and gave him an exasperated glance. “This is about you, and how you feel about it. It’s up to you what happens now.” He’d placed the burden at Joshua’s door, right alongside the one he was already dealing with—outing his sexuality to his family. It almost felt as if Stewart was using this to push him one way or the other, by accepting Holly into their bed. “Is that some kind of test?” Stewart’s mouth quirked to one side. “It was meant to be a gesture of faith and trust. I care about you, you stupid bastard.” Joshua was hauled up a moment. It was something Stewart rarely put into words. He was a gruff kind of man. Nevertheless, Joshua’s more visceral reaction was blurted in the heat of the moment. “It’s right up your street though isn’t it, having a woman as well as me?” Stewart rolled his eyes. “It didn’t happen like that, and you know it.” “Didn’t it? You were the one who got the three of us on the bed.” “For Christ’s sake, you were the one who invited Holly to your family event. That was to suit you, nothing to do with me.” Irritation flashed in Stewart’s eyes. “I’m strong enough to admit being bi, and that is not something you’ll ever change. I told you that at the outset.” He had told him that, but Josh hadn’t expected Saturday night to happen. Angry, he lashed out. “Oh right, so this is about you being better than me now, because your bisexuality makes you some kind of higher being.” “You’re deliberately misunderstanding me,” Stewart stated, from between gritted teeth. “But if you want to push my buttons, and you have, then yes, I do feel better because I’ve admitted what I want.” Joshua bristled. “That’s low.” “No it’s not, it’s the truth. The way I see it, you’re in a mess. I’m not. Simple.” That hit Josh hard and he hung his head. “Look Josh, I’m attracted to people, not their gender.” “So am I, I think.” His head hurt. Stewart, however, was on a roll. “Okay, but…what the hell do you want me to think? It seems to be black and white for you, putting things in boxes and labelling them and denying that there was ever any other way to do it. That’s not how I feel, so shoot me.” “It’s not about labels.” Joshua stood up and put his hands flat to the surface of the table, furious. “It was because I’d never felt anything as strong as the need I felt for you. You were all I wanted. To me, that meant I was gay.” Stewart stared at him, the tension that had built in the atmosphere between them peaking then levelling as they looked into each other’s eyes. Stewart nodded then gestured at the chair. “Sit down for crying out loud. This shouldn’t be an argument. We both want each other, it’s not about that.” “I know, I’m sorry.”

“You can’t deny you wanted Holly.” Josh sighed. “I did want her, yes.” “And your ex?” “I thought I did. But, I wanted you more.” He shook his head, remembering the turmoil. “It wasn’t easy. I didn’t want to hurt Sue, she was a friend…but I did that for you.” His emotions were getting the better of him, he knew that. He slumped back in his chair and put his head in his hands. “What, did you think you’d never be attracted to a woman again?” “That’s exactly what I thought!” He blurted it out. “I never thought something like this would happen.” “No, but it did.” Stewart’s brows were lowered. “So coming out as gay was a statement about how you felt about me…maybe?” Joshua felt increasingly miserable. “Maybe.” “Can you at least understand where I’m coming from, when I leave the door open on my sexuality?” Joshua lifted his head and stared at his lover, and he felt suddenly cold, icy to the bone. “That’s what scares me most of all, that you’re going to meet a woman you want more than me.” “Yes,” Stewart agreed after a long moment, “or a man. It could be either. We all have to live with that possibility, but we can’t live a life in fear of what might be.” That suggestion did nothing to settle Joshua, but he could see what Stewart was getting at. It could be a man or a woman, that didn’t really matter. He swore silently. “Yeah, I guess so.” “Don’t you think I thought about what I am and what people expect of me? Believe me, I’ve had flack from all angles. Growing up in a small town in Scotland where everybody knew everybody’s business made it doubly worse. I’ve been called a fence-sitter and worse.” Joshua was astonished. “You’ve never told me that before, you always shrugged it off when I asked.” “Because it’s history.” He stared across the table, and Josh had the horrible feeling that he was telling him to buck up his attitude or they’d be over. But Stewart gestured with his hands, and his expression softened. “Okay, I’m sorry. I’m not one to dwell on the dark days, but if you think it would help you, we can talk about it…you know what I’m like. I’m a doer. I get on with it. None of this is meant to be easy, but we have to make our choices and we live with it. If something changes, we have to deal with it when it occurs. That’s life.” “Is that your pep talk?” “No, it’s just…for fuck’s sake, Josh. If these things were bothering you so much, you should have talked to me about them. I thought you were just worrying about telling your parents.” Joshua wondered why it was that Stewart was in control and he wasn’t. “Things were so bloody good between us. I didn’t want to spoil it with my doubts. You’re chilled with who you are, I want to be that way but it hasn’t happened yet.” “It’ll happen.” Joshua couldn’t even begin to believe that, not right at that moment. He’d never felt so torn. They sat in silent contemplation for a while. Then Stewart got up and fetched them another couple of beers. “We’ve been wrapped up in exploring each other,” he said. “Perhaps we need to make time to talk about this stuff some more.” When Josh didn’t say anything, he carried on. “Surely you feel a bit more relaxed about telling your folks, after what emerged about your uncle on Saturday?” Joshua snorted. “I should be, but to be honest it just made me feel stupid.” “You’re not stupid.” “It also meant I’d made things more complicated, just like you said I had, and now I have to extricate myself from that.” Stewart reached over and covered Joshua’s hand with his own. “Things are good. Lighten up.” Joshua nodded, but he wasn’t entirely convinced. When he met Stewart’s earnest stare, it just made him feel even more stupid. Stewart squeezed his hand. “Just because I’m attracted to a woman it doesn’t mean I’m going to sleep with her, not while I’ve made a commitment to you. On Saturday we both wanted it, that’s why it happened.” The anxious feeling dissolved somewhat. Not completely, but it let go of its hold on him enough that he could breathe easier and nod. “I know. I’m sorry.” He pushed his empty beer bottle to one side. “I’m in a mess and I’m still trying to figure what the hell went on between the three of us on Saturday night, and now this…something else to figure out.” Stewart sighed. “Sometimes human beings do something because it feels good, simple as that. Torturing yourself over it is no way to live. Saturday night was about three people sharing a bit of fun, no need to make a big deal of it. Under the circumstances I’d call it light relief.” Joshua lifted his eyebrows. “Yes, okay, it was damn hot and it was more than light relief, but I’m not about to crucify myself over the event when it’s already happened, and neither should you.” Joshua thought about that and once again wished that he could be as easy-going as his lover. Thank God Stewart was grounded. It was harder for him to come to terms with change, but he liked to think he got there, eventually. “Maybe you’re right.” “Do you regret moving in with me?” Stewart asked the question out of the blue, and it shocked Joshua. There was a brooding look in his eyes. “No.” Josh stated it fast and firm. “I’ve told people at work about you. In a few days my parents will know too.” “That’s good, but maybe you should hang fire.” Stewart locked his gaze, deeply serious. “What do you mean?” “I mean you might be bisexual, have you considered that? You’re so into your labels and everything, but you can’t deny that you enjoyed being with Holly.” “No I can’t deny it, but my fundamental belief is that a relationship is meant to be one-on-one.” Stewart gesticulated with his hands, temper flaring again. “Where do you get these things from? One-on-one, my frickin’ arse. What if it’s not meant to be? It’s like you are blinkered to human nature. We are here on this planet to explore and evolve, and you should have realised that on Saturday night. We’re still here, together, we still care about each other. It didn’t change anything, and it was damned good. You were given a taste of the world and you’re still prepared to deny it exists.” One thing was clear to him—Stewart was fighting for Holly to remain in the picture. “You really want her, don’t you?” “Yes, but so did you. And that’s the point, that’s why it happened.” Stewart was vehement. “Do you see what I’m saying?” Josh glared at him, annoyed that his lover always seemed to be one step ahead while he floundered to come to terms with what was happening around him. “Yes, I see it.” Silence reigned. I can rise to this. Joshua took a deep breath, filling his lungs. “This psychic thing. What the hell does it mean?” “I’m not sure. But Holly is in a state about it.” Joshua stared down at the table. He didn’t want to hear that. “That’s not good.” “No. On that we are agreed.” Stewart gave a wry smile. “Whatever happens, Holly is our friend and she needs us to know about this. It’s weighing heavily on her.”

Joshua put up his hands. He hated to think that she was burdened in any way. Hell, he was burdened enough for the three of them. “I just want to understand it. I can’t begin to deal with it if I don’t understand it.” He felt like that about a lot of things. This thing with Holly had now become bound up with all the other issues in his life. Stewart pushed back his chair and stood up. “Holly can help with that.” Joshua rose to his feet too. “Before we go over there, there’s something I have to ask.” “Go ahead.” “Did you always want her?” Stewart stepped away from the table as he replied. “I’d always thought she was attractive, a special woman. I admired her a lot. Once it was blatantly obvious you wanted her, that flipped me into overdrive…it was so hot. It had to happen, Josh, you know it.” He nodded, joining him. “And now?” “Now we’re doing what she asked, as friends.” Stewart reached out and put one hand on Josh’s back, between his shoulder blades. “Chill man, stop over analysing everything.” Josh managed to smile. “I’ll try.”

Chapter Thirteen

By the time they left their flat Holly was already on her feet and standing inside her front door, trying to steady her breathing while she waited for them to knock. Her emotions were ragged, her heart racing. She’d felt every ounce of Joshua’s upset and anger, and she hated how it had been directed at Stewart. What had emerged from the conversation had made her want to barge in there and tell them no, this wasn’t why she had told them about her psychic connection. It had been brewing perhaps, but she was the trigger and that left her shaky with emotion. Before Stewart had even knocked at the door, she opened it. “Knew we were coming, huh?” Amusement rang in his tone. She thought he would look tired, haggard even, but instead he looked kind of wired. It was if he anticipated how this would pan out and was watchful to keep it on track. His glance sidled back over his shoulder towards his companion then he reached out and put one hand around her upper arm, squeezing it affectionately. The way he looked at her took her right back to that afternoon and to the brief intimacy they had shared in his office at the gym, and her breath hitched as she tried to respond. “Yes, sorry. I did know.” “Weird,” he replied amiably, as he stepped into her flat. The way he said it made her wonder if he liked that though—having an intense man and a freaky woman in his life. She shook the odd notion off. Behind him Joshua lingered, and she could feel the tension and uncertainty in him. Mustering a smile, she willed him to know how important this was for her, and how difficult. “I’m so sorry, Josh. It just happened. It’s not something I wanted and at the moment it’s beyond my control. I wish I could change that.” Joshua looked at her silently for what felt like an age. “You’re going to have to help me with this.” “I will.” All the while she felt two things from him, desire, and his resistance to the idea that they were bonded in some psychic way. When he walked into her space the driving force that made him do so was desire—raw human need for the object of affection. Holly’s legs grew weak for a moment. She straightened her spine, beefing herself up. Desire was good, she decided. She could attempt to build on that. It was gladly accepted, she didn’t want to lose his trust now. She closed the door behind him and ushered them into her sitting room. Stewart immediately strode across the room and made himself a seat perched on the windowsill, with his feet up on a dining chair to counterbalance him. He was like a stalking cat, taking up a position slightly above them to observe. Joshua remained standing, close to the doorway to the hall and with his hands shoved into his jeans pockets. Awkward tension filled the atmosphere, and it was shot through with wary anticipation. She took a deep breath. “I appreciate you both coming over and giving me the chance to explain.” “Why has this happened?” Stewart asked, breaking the ice for her. “I don’t know. It started at the time of the accident. Faye, one of my sisters, thinks it might be tied into that event. She’s read some theories about it,” she continued cautiously, “but they don’t really explain why it happened.” “You’ve discussed it with your sisters?” Josh seemed surprised, and wary. Holly had to resist the urge to groan. “Yes, I did. I know you think I’m a strong woman, and mostly I am, but occasionally I need my support networks too.” She wished it hadn’t come out quite as snippy as it did, but her emotions were running high. “My sisters are the only ones who can begin to understand what this feels like for me,” she said, urging him to try to understand. “The bottom line is I have a psychic ability, and it has become engaged with you at a deep level. I care about you, Josh, and deep down I think perhaps that is why it happened.” He met her gaze directly, not flinching, and she felt something begin to unlock inside him. It was almost imperceptible, but it was the fact she might occasionally need some support that had got through to him. He really did think she was impervious to life’s crap. Well mostly she was, but not always. “I can’t explain the mechanics of it, but then neither I nor my sisters have been able to explain why we have psychic powers while other people don’t. We’ve grown to accept it as a fact of life, just as some people are gifted with the ability to learn many languages and others aren’t.” Joshua shifted for the first time. He pulled off his sweater and put it over the back of a chair. Holly was relieved. At least he didn’t look quite so much as if he was about to walk off in a huff. He sighed aloud. “You make it sound so simple.” A low, almost harsh laugh came from where Stewart sat by the window. “And that doesn’t suit you because you do love to make everything so very complicated.” Both Holly and Joshua pulled back and looked at him. He shrugged in response, one corner of his mouth lifting. Holly thought Joshua might have been annoyed, but he was way beyond that now. He shot Stewart a warning glance, but didn’t respond verbally. He was reaching out, he wanted to understand, but it was still out of his reach at the present time. Holly longed to take him in her arms, to hold him and somehow make him understand by osmosis, but unfortunately that wouldn’t happen. She took strength from Stewart’s reaction earlier that day. He’d been sceptical, but he hadn’t let it be an obstacle between them. He was more a creature of instincts than Josh. Josh was more cautious and reasoned, and his reaction to anything he couldn’t control was to put up a barrier. Frustration boiled up inside her. “Consider this. Would I have come to your family party on Saturday, had I not been able to feel that you really wanted me to?” Oh yes, that startled him. “I could feel how torn up you were over the mix-up on the phone, but the most instinctive and enduring response was that you wanted me to be there. That’s why I agreed to it. God knows, being someone’s pretend girlfriend is not an ideal situation for any woman, especially when she cares about the man in question.” That seemed to level him somewhat, so she continued on. “Likewise when I got into bed with the pair of you. Stewart makes his feelings obvious in a situation like that, but you didn’t. It was only because I could reach you psychically I knew how much you wanted it. Do you really think I’d have chosen to put myself out there if I hadn’t known you were fascinated by the turn of events? Can you imagine the risk, playing gooseberry in that setup?” He reeled inside, his thoughts ricocheting from what she’d said, back to the events of that night. “Good point,” Stewart said. “Holly doesn’t know you as well as I do. She had to have had that inside track otherwise that situation would not have attracted her.” Joshua looked as if he’d been slapped in the face, and she could see and feel how the raw truth dawned on him. “You’re seeing it now, yes?” He shook his head and gave a disbelieving laugh, and she knew that he understood what she pointed out, that she could reach inside him even now, that she knew his innermost reactions, every step of the way. “Yes, I can see what you’re saying, but it doesn’t make it any easier.” “Of course not. My sisters and I have spent the whole of our lives keeping our abilities secret because it’s just too surreal for most people to take on

board. It becomes less freakish with time. I know that because one of my sisters has a successful relationship, and for both it’s just become part of them now, part of everything that makes them who and what they are together.” She sensed he was growing closer to an understanding, but it was a struggle. “Saturday night happened because of that,” he queried. “Is that what you’re saying?” “Yes. The attraction was there between the three of us, but you were the one who was having trouble with it. You wanted it though. That’s why it happened, and that’s why we are here now. I just can’t go on with this inside knowledge of you, without you knowing. It feels wrong to me, and it might be the wrong thing bringing out in the open like this, but I had to. I don’t want to lose either of you as friends, and the time we’ve had together has been precious to me, but this had to be said.” After a moment, she pushed on and added, “Do you need more evidence?” He was silent, but only because he didn’t want to offend her again. “Yes, you do.” She raised her eyebrows at him. “Okay, here goes.” She knew she was taking a real risk now, delving deeper into his psyche in order to prove a point, but it had to be done. Wishing she’d had a stiff drink before they arrived, she stepped back and forth across the room. The sense of movement made her feel less awkward about what she was about to say. “Last Wednesday night…you started to make love in the hallway. You didn’t make it to the bedroom. You knew Stewart was worried about your injuries and, you let him…handle you… but you wanted more. You hated what the accident had done to you. You didn’t want to feel fragile, you wanted to tussle.” From under lowered eyelids she assessed them both. Joshua was still wary but enthralled. He nodded, his attention totally hers. Stewart observed from his perch. There was a brooding quality to his pose and his expression made him look as if he was about to pounce. Holly felt strangely uplifted. “The following night, after your successful appointment at the doctor’s, you went down on Stewart, and you thought briefly about the first time he touched you and kissed you.” His reaction flooded her. She edged it on. “It was in the gym, in the changing rooms.” “Bloody hell, that’s incredible.” Joshua shook his head as he stared across at her. “You really can…” Holly nodded. The sense of relief she felt was so big it burned in her chest. He was addressing it now, and he looked at her with a kind of awe. All she wanted was the understanding, but his response made her feel so much better she became close to tears, happy tears. It had been the right thing to do, telling them. “You’re amazing.” The emotion she could hear in his voice was reflected inside him, tenfold. Given the proof that he needed, he’d taken the leap of faith and now he was thinking of her and what this meant to her. She gave a soft laugh. “I don’t feel amazing. To be honest I’ve felt like a naughty voyeur with a dirty little secret. That’s why I had to get it out in the open.” Stewart gave what sounded like a growl from the window. “If it turns you on as much as it did on Saturday night, you can share his emotions with us any time.” “Jesus, Stewart,” Joshua said. “Does everything come back to sex with you?” “Hey, I’m honest.” He gave a nod to both of them. “I’m in a room with the two people I want to shag most in the world, and they are currently talking about the first time you and me got it on. What’s not to love?” Joshua shook his head, but he was smiling. “You have a point.” He pursed his lips, thoughtful as he looked back at Holly. She sensed his expectation. He wanted more. Her pulse raced, her thoughts moving rapidly forward now that he was beginning to come to an understanding. “I’ve being dying to know more, about that first time, about how you two evolved.” He stared across at her. He was thinking about sex now, the three of them—just as Stewart had hinted at in his previous comment—and as his blood pumped harder, hotter, so the desire rushed around Holly’s veins too. “If I think about it now, will you experience that?” “Good call,” Stewart said, putting his elbows on his knees, his feet widely spaced on the chair they rested on. His upper body was angled forward as if he didn’t want to miss a word. “Go ahead,” she said, “let me feel the way you felt about it. We’ll test it out.” Joshua retraced his memories, pausing only when she spoke. A barrage of information hit her. “Every time you went to the gym, you hoped Stewart would be there. At first you thought it was because you enjoyed chatting with him, comparing notes about diet and forms of exercise. Then this one day you were chatting in the changing rooms and you touched him on the shoulder, measuring his muscle during a discussion. That flashed you forward, and you knew you wanted him.” “It shocked you at first, because you were having an erection, and you prayed he wouldn’t notice. And then something shifted and you wanted him to notice, you wanted him to know.” “Seriously?” Stewart interrupted. It drew Josh’s attention away from her and he looked across the room at his lover. He nodded and they stared at each other across the space. “Why haven’t you told me this,” Stewart asked. “Why don’t I know that you thought those things?” Josh didn’t respond for some time. “Because I can’t say it out loud the way Holly can, it’s too hard. Just like you don’t say stuff to me…” They stared at each other, and the impact of those few words was tremendous. Holly felt it echoing through Josh, and once again she felt as if she were intruding on their relationship. Then she felt Joshua’s gratitude, and it was directed at her. These were all the things the two men hadn’t discussed. That evening, both in their place and now in hers, they were addressing it all. Until then they’d barely talked about it. Beyond moving in together and coming out, they’d both just rolled with the moment and all that followed, and she was now enabling them to learn a little bit more about each other. Joshua looked her way. “Let’s go on.” There was a sense of being sure about him, as if he liked the way this was evolving. Holly waited while he thought about what came next. She ran her fingers through her hair, her arousal soaring as he took her deep into the experience. It was so intense that her sex throbbed and her clothing felt tight and restrictive. “You kept your hand on him, silently begging him to react, and Stewart knew. That moment of prolonged contact was like a trigger. You didn’t care where you were or what happened if anyone walked in.” She paused, huffed a laugh. “This is such a turn-on for me, I can scarcely catch my breath here.” “Tell me about it,” Stewart commented. His gaze covered her, hungrily, and Holly pressed on lest she stride over there and beg him to let her sit on his lap…and grind. “All you could think about was getting your hands on him,” she continued. “Stewart backed you up against the wall, and you grabbed a coat hook in each hand, using that to keep you upright while he pressed his body against yours.” Holly swayed, her body increasingly heavy with arousal. “You could feel it. You could feel his erection, couldn’t you?” Joshua nodded. “It was the most amazing experience, just rubbing our cocks together like that, and the way Stewart grabbed me…” He looked back

at Stewart, pausing. “This is unreal, talking about it like this.” “Damn hot, too,” Stewart responded, and his glance went to Holly, before returning to Josh. His eyes glittered darkly. Holly nodded then picked up the story, because Joshua was still unfolding his memories and she was flying along on the heady eroticism of their first encounter. “He put his hands around your buttocks and used his strength to show you what he could do, jousting his cock against yours, making you weak with lust.” Stewart nodded. “Practically did it there and then, didn’t we? Then common sense prevailed and we met up privately later.” Joshua answered. “Yes, and I was scared but I couldn’t not go, then I knew I was gay because I wanted Stewart so badly. It wasn’t like anything I’d felt before.” Holly’s heart sank. It was only then, in that split-second, that she realised she’d been subconsciously hoping that he was bisexual, just as Stewart was. He enjoyed being with her, she knew that, but it wasn’t something she could force, and a hard knot of disappointment gathered in her chest. Stewart reacted though. “Josh, let yourself loosely once in a while.” “I am letting myself loosely. Hell, what are we doing here now, with Holly?” “Yes, it’s some game all right.” Stewart stared at Holly. “No denying what you can do with that ability of yours.” “Are you angry?” He’d been angry earlier. She’d felt it as Joshua had. Stewart shook his head. One corner of his mouth lifted. “Holly, this psychic thing of yours is the hottest sex game I’ve ever played. Angry? What do you think?” Part of her tension dissolved because he’d said that, but she still needed to be sure. “It’s beyond that though. It’s intrusive, especially if Josh isn’t happy about it.” Joshua shifted his position for the first time in ages and sat down on the sofa. “I’m grateful for what tonight has brought about, but it’s still doing my head in.” Still he stared across at her, and she could feel how much he wanted to hold her, instead of talking. His nature wouldn’t allow him to be so blatant, especially when they’d come to talk, but it was there in him nonetheless. “Weird as it is, I guess it’s not doing anyone any harm.” Holly knew the rest of what he felt and she put into words. “If anything, you’re grateful that someone understands what you’ve been going through.” He peered at her than gave a wry laugh. “Without me even having to say it, apparently.” Stewart nodded, slowly. Then he looked at Holly with a quizzical glance. “And you say experiencing this turns you on?” Holly took in the blatant arousal in his expression, then assessed the absolute air of intent about him. He was going to act on her response, she knew that just by looking at him. Something about the dynamic between the three of them, discussing what had gone on in their first encounter, had made him want raw, rough sex. Holly’s blood pounded in her veins, the heat between her thighs molten. Was it three-way sex he wanted, like they had enjoyed the other night? Before she responded, she studied Joshua, too. Curiosity poured from him. He wanted to know too. “Come on, tell us,” Stewart urged. “After all, you’re privy to all of our bed action. Tell us what it does to you.” “It gets me hot, really hot.” “And?” He wasn’t going to let it drop there. “I’m embarrassed to talk about me.” Her legs went weak under her. Stewart moved, the first time since he’d taken up his seat perched on the windowsill. He closed the gap between them and looked her up and down, intrigued. Caressing her jaw, he tipped her head back with one finger underneath her chin. Her heart hammered in her chest. His eyes glinted, their expression demanding. “It’s only fair, Holly. You owe us. Give us all the gory details.” Power oozed from him. He had taken control of the situation, and now she felt like his plaything. It made her tremble, and it made her want to submit to his will. “At first I was shocked. I was horribly embarrassed that I was getting horny because I could see into your private sex life, like an intruder. It was hard. I tried to push it away by denying it…by denying myself.” “Then something changed?” She nodded. “Once I saw how things developed.” She paused, swallowed. “I couldn’t help myself. ““ “You touched yourself?” Tension filled the atmosphere. Across the room, Joshua swore beneath his breath. He was rock hard. She could feel how much he wanted to stroke his hand over his cock while he watched Stewart urging her to talk. Holly squirmed. “Yes, I had too. It made me crazy, seeing it, feeling it…” She was feeling it now, from both of them. A moan escaped her. Stewart leaned closer to her, his face a breath away from hers. “You’ve been masturbating while we are having sex?” Her eyes flashed shut while she tried to level herself. It wasn’t easy. Humiliation washed over her, and it felt absurdly good confessing her deviant thrill. “This is turning you on,” Joshua stated. She knew he meant her, but it was Stewart who responded. Stewart gave a dry laugh. “Of course it is. But are you going to deny that it’s doing the same to you?” The way he looked at his lover forbade him to try. It was as if he held the both of them by the sheer strength of his will. Holly had never seen Stewart like this. Even though she knew he was the dominant one in their relationship, this was the first time she had felt the full force of it. He’d been more cautious on Saturday night. He wasn’t being cautious any more. He moved behind her, lifted her hair and trailed kisses the length of her neck. Holly was so keyed up that she moaned each time his mouth made contact with her skin. His hands were on her waist and they moved higher, cupping her breasts through her shirt. When she swayed back against him, he acted on it. Lowering one hand over the mound of her pussy through her clothing he forced her back against him, rocking them together as he kissed the side of her neck. She felt the hard bough of his erection pressing against the small of her back and whispered his name. “Go on,” he encouraged, “tell us more.” Holly stole a look at Joshua from under heavy-lidded eyes, and his attention was riveted to the pair of them. It was hard to concentrate when she was being stimulated by Stewart, but she struggled to do so, teasing apart the complex emotions that were pouring from him. Overwhelming need filled the atmosphere. He craved more of what they had shared two nights before. She sensed no negativity there, no fear, just desire. Encouraged, she responded to Stewart’s suggestion. “It’s been driving me crazy. I had to use a vibrator, to fill myself.” Stewart’s teeth marked the soft skin at the base of her throat and his hands gripped her hips tightly. When he lifted his head, it was to whisper, “You’re so hot, and I want to undress you and show Josh how aroused you are. You okay with that?” She couldn’t form the words. Instead she put her hand over his where it rested on the buttons of her shirt, and squeezed. Stewart undid those buttons, peeled away the shirt and unhooked her bra. When he cast it aside, he cupped her bared breasts, staring at his lover over her shoulder. “You see how aroused she is? That’s because of you and me.” Joshua nodded. The bulge in his jeans was large. Holly longed to take it in her hand.

“I can tell that you want her.” Stewart rubbed his thumbs over her taut nipples, an action that made her writhe in his grip. Again he kissed her neck then breathed along her skin, making her wilt. “What did you want, Holly? Tell us what you thought about while you pushed that vibrator inside you.” His tone was so commanding it made her weak with the desire to submit. “I wanted to be between you.” The words came out in a breathless rush. “I wanted to be right there between the both of you.” Stewart cursed beneath his breath then lifted her bodily with his arms around her waist. The action was so sudden and so potent it stole the breath from her lungs. He carried her closer to the place where Joshua was sitting. “Like this?” Josh looked up at her. His growing lust had kicked all other emotions out of the picture. Her spirit soared. We all want this. She nodded. “Yes, but naked, all of us.” “Show us,” Stewart instructed. His hand massaging her shoulder took her nervousness away. Bending down, she undid the buttons on Josh’s shirt. While she did so Stewart’s hands roved over the curve of her hips, slowing her actions. With one man in front of her and the other so close behind, her thoughts were garbled, her mind a dizzy rush. Meanwhile Joshua had an intense expression in his eyes and he urged her on, silently. Holly paused when she realised he was using their connection. Do it, touch me. Thrilled at his offering, she ran her finger along his jaw to connect with him before she continued to undo his buttons. When the shirt hung loosely she pressed her hands flat against his chest. Recognition flared in him, his chest lifting under her splayed fingers. “Holly,” he whispered. The warm skin under her hands made her yearn for him. “I know.” His hand locked around her wrist, tethering her to him. She nodded. “Like this,” she managed to whisper over her shoulder. “I wanted you both like this.” Joshua leant forward and pushed his fingers into her hair, kissing her mouth passionately. Holly staggered, but Stewart was there to hold her. “Show us your fantasy,” he instructed. Lowering to her knees, she shuffled between Joshua’s thighs and latched her fingers over his belt buckle, anchoring herself there for a moment as her hips swayed. Their attention and scrutiny left her breathless. Her hands were shaking as she undid his belt and button. It wasn’t the time for nerves, but she’d been thrust into the limelight and was revealing her innermost fantasies while they urged her on. Her insides fluttered with tremulous anticipation. She felt as nervous as a bird on its first flight. Tugging on his zipper, she managed to get it down. Her mouth watered when she saw the bough of his erection pressing against the soft cotton of his jockey shorts. Easing the shorts down, she sucked in her breath as his cock bounced free. Instantly she knew how much Joshua wanted her to touch it, and without hesitation she wrapped her fingers around it, admiring its smooth, hard length. The skin of the shaft was velvety under her fingers, and hot. Mesmerised, saliva pooled in her mouth. She wanted to taste him, she also wanted to straddle him and ride on him, to have him everywhere. Stewart had dropped to a kneeling position behind her, his hips spooning hers, and it wired her for action. He reached around and moulded her bared breasts in his hands. His touch sent darts of sensation looping inside her every time his calloused thumbs moved over her stiffened nipples. Her hips moved of their own accord, rocking against the erection she could feel pressing to her bottom. “You like this, to be between us like this?” Stewart’s voice kept her tethered to the moment. It kept her focussed when she was otherwise spinning in a whirlpool of lust. “Yes, like this.” “Like our plaything, something we can enjoy together?” There was a dark edge to his voice, and Josh tensed. “Stewart,” he warned. Inwardly, she smiled. He was so well brought up. “No,” she interjected, “it’s true.” Joshua stroked the back of his fingers down her cheek and gazed deep into her eyes. He needed to be sure. Shame and lust poured through her, her face heating. Her hand locked around the base of his erection. She nodded. “It’s so sexy.” His expression tightened, imperceptibly, but she felt need barrel through him. He looked at her with something akin to awe, then ran his thumb over her lips affectionately. He wondered what it would be like, to feel those lips sliding over his crown. When the thought reached her she slid her fingers over the head of his cock, her lips parting. Joshua groaned, his head going back. He looked at her through narrowed eyes, watching her actions. The head of his cock was damp under her fingers and she moved the slippery fluid with her fingers and spread it down his shaft. With one hand on Joshua’s erection, she directed it to her lips. “I wanted this, I wanted to taste you.” She heard Stewart’s voice, a murmur of appreciation, but didn’t catch his words. Then her lips closed over the swollen head of Josh’s erection, and his body jolted. She licked at the underside, tasting his essence, adoring the way he filled her mouth just as he had filled her sex. The immense pleasure he felt rolled through her, carrying her on. His fingers trailed against her hair and face, welcoming her. Each time she took his length into her mouth, drawing him off, a surge of ecstasy ran through them both. She was wrapped in the raw energy, the primal lust of the moment, but a mumbled, urgent conversation reached her. “Wait up.” It was Joshua. When she lifted free, Joshua pressed his fingers around the base of his cock, and she saw how close to coming he’d been. He looked away, towards Stewart. When Holly glanced back, she could see that Stewart had freed his cock from his jeans and was reaching into his pocket for a condom. The certain knowledge that she was going to receive them both at the same time charged through her, and it made her body ripple and sway. Between her thighs she was so hot that her underwear was clinging to her groove, and she wanted them off, wanted Stewart’s cock there instead. Her centre burned for them both, and the sight of Stewart rolling on a condom made her pussy clench with expectation. Focussing on Joshua, she gasped as Stewart’s rough hands pushed up her skirt and pulled down her knickers, leaving them to dangle at her knees. Kneeling as she was, her bared pussy tingled wildly in response to the exposure. Hot liquid dribbled down her swollen nether lips. Stewart nudged her legs further apart with his knee. Then she felt his fingers opening her up and her body arched, her hips lifting to give him better access. He eased his cock inside, stretching her open, before he withdrew it and ran it down over the swollen bump of her clit. The torturous action knocked the breath from her lungs, and she gasped loudly. Trembling with need, she pushed back. Stewart reached around, turned her face towards him with one strong hand on her jaw, and examined her, as if he enjoyed seeing the need on her face. How he loved to be in charge of them both, Holly thought fleetingly, and how very stimulating it was. “I so want to be there,” he murmured, and rubbed the blunt head of his cock at her slick opening again. “Stewart,” she pleaded, and it came out long and low and desperate. His eyes blazed and he let her face Joshua again, then returned his attention to her nether region. Again he shifted his cock, rubbing it over her

sensitive clit. She was so strung out with need that she came, sweet and sudden and with an intensity that made her core vibrate and spasm. “Oh, oh,” she cried out. As it rolled on away, her back arched and again she pushed back towards him, desperate for him to fill her aching sheath. When he finally thrust deep into her, she looked into Joshua’s eyes for a moment, then grasped his erection and took it deep into her mouth, because she wanted to mirror everything. She wanted to feel them filling her, for her body to be a supple, vibrant conduit between them. Joshua’s deep pleasures at all he felt and watched stole her last bit of mental awareness. After that moment she was made of pure animal lust, her body vibrating, reaching for each thrust, her hands and mouth welcoming the man in front of her, her hips arching back to take the one behind her. But Stewart continued to explore her with his fingers as he rode in and out of her slick sheath. Holding her nether lips apart with his thumbs, he pushed deeper still. The sensitive folds of her pussy practically sang with delight, pressed against his hard body as they were, then he manipulated her buttocks, squeezing them between his hands and running his thumbs into her crease. He was manhandling her, and Holly had to lift her head to cry out, panting loudly. “You like that.” She was barely able to moan in response. “She likes it,” Joshua whispered, and when she met his gaze, his eyes glittered darkly. Even though his cock was unbearably distended and on the verge of spilling, she sensed that what he wanted to do most of all was see her being fucked by Stewart, to watch, even if that meant she couldn’t take him, even if he had to jerk himself off at the end of it. “Oh Josh…” Crooning with pleasure she rolled the tip of her tongue over his swollen crown. His hand locked around the base of his cock and he nodded at her. He knew she understood. He knew that she couldn’t control it, not with the way Stewart was touching her, exploring her as he was. He knew because he’d been there, he’d been handled that way. Stewart’s fingers were all over her, massaging her buttocks as if he owned them. The brutish handling made her crazy. Another orgasm blistered close to the surface. She shuddered, her body clamping on his erection. Her eyes were on Joshua’s cock. “Wank for me,” she pleaded. “I want to see you come.” Joshua cursed, locked one hand around his balls, and jerked his cock off with the other. “Damn,” Stewart said, “this is going to make me come far too quickly.” His cock seemed to grow even harder, bruising her centre as he drove, piston-like into her, barely in control in the final throws, before he let rip and came. It was all too much. Holly’s head lifted, her mouth opening in the silent, primal cry of release. Stewart’s body jerked so violently while she was on the crest, that she had to wedge her elbows on the sofa either side of Joshua’s hips to maintain her position. Stewart’s cock slid free of her sex, but his hands held her hips, holding her upright. Gasping for breath, her body weak from release, she held tight to Joshua’s sides. He massaged his cock faster and she locked eyes with him, her legs shuddering under her as she tried to stay upright. “Holly,” he whispered, his hand stilling. Hot fluid covered her breasts. Holly watched, mesmerised, as bolt after bolt spurted over her, then the power of his release hit her, and she swooned back. “Hey, I’ve got you,” Stewart whispered, grabbing her and cradling her in his arms. “Well caught,” she said with a disbelieving laugh, and wilted in his arms.

Chapter Fourteen

“I’m in seventh heaven,” Holly whispered, and tangled her arms around Stewart’s neck. Being carried in his powerful arms was a dizzying experience in itself, and coming so close behind the amazing sex they had just enjoyed it was doubly good. He looked down at her, happily. “Pleased to be of service.” Lazing in his arms, still heavy with the afterglow, she wondered if she was dreaming. But no, as he carried her into the bathroom, carefully easing her through the doorway, she saw that he had indeed run the steaming bubble bath that she had joked about needing after they had disentangled. He’d even lit the aromatherapy candle that stood in a glass jar at one corner of the bath. Stewart paused on the bath mat, and cocked his head on one side. “Ready?” Holly chuckled, meshing her fingers behind his head, suddenly wanting to stay in his arms instead of being lowered into the water, as he had informed her he intended to do. With the utmost care he eased her into the warm water, keeping his arms around her, one at the back of her shoulders, the other under her knees. Slowly submerged into the warm, frothy bath, she dissolved anew. She expected him to let the water take her, but he stayed in position until she straightened her legs and rested her hands on the sides of the bath. Only then did he loosen his grip. Lowering to his knees beside the bath, he began to lap the warm water over her upper body. Scrutinising every inch of her body, he pushed the warm water over her skin, making her hum with pleasure. “This is such a treat.” “You’re the treat,” he responded. His gaze travelled the length of her through the water and he cleared the bubbles here and there with his hand as if to see her better. “Comfy,” he asked. When she nodded, he reached for the big chunky sponge that she kept beside the bath. Soaping it up, he made ready to use it. “Isn’t this spoiling me a bit too much?” “No.” He moved the sudsy sponge over her skin, taking his time. Holly felt cherished, and she had never seen him quite so serious before. She gripped the sides of the bath tighter, breathless as he paid such close attention to her. A moment later Joshua joined them and the tiny bathroom was filled with testosterone and energy. He’d kept his jockey shorts on, but lost his jeans. He had a bottle of water in one hand, and three tumblers of whisky in the other. He put the glasses down on the corner of the bath. “Well done, you found it.” “It was either that or some dubious looking Irish liqueur. Did I do the right thing?” He opened the water bottle and drank heavily from it before putting it aside, then grinned “Whisky sounds good,” Stewart responded and lifted two of the tumblers. He nosed the glass. “Scottish malt?” She nodded. “You have such good taste.” “I know,” she responded, and lifted her eyebrows at him. He handed her one of the tumblers. Holly cradled it between her hands, breathing in the single malt and allowing herself to revel in the absolute decadence of lounging in the bath sipping whisky, while the two men she’d just made love with watched on. She looked at Joshua over her glass. “I gather you don’t like Irish liqueur.” “I expressed that much emotion about it?” Amused irony came across in his tone. She chuckled. “Yes, extreme distaste.” He stared at her, still knocked sideways by the fact that she could read his responses so accurately. “Will it always be like this?” “I don’t know. My sister—the older one, Monica—she suggested it might be tied in to your injury, and when you’re completely healed the connection will fade.” “Not much healing left to do,” he said. “So it seems.” They looked at each other, silently addressing the implications. They might be tied together this way forever. “I say we enjoy it while it lasts.” Stewart lapped the warm water over her bared breasts again. Mischief shone in his eyes as he looked at her. “Is he jealous that I’m doing this and he isn’t?” “No, he’s enjoying watching.” She glanced at Joshua, who had leaned up against the tiled wall. The way he stood there in his boxer shorts with his feet widely spaced, observing her with those dark chocolate eyes of his, made a shiver run through her, even though she was hot. “The only time I got jealousy from Joshua was when you discussed the fact I came to see you at the gym.” Stewart gave a low laugh. He turned to Joshua. “Maybe you’re a bit psychic as well, because it was an interesting meeting.” “Don’t,” Holly said, nudging his hand. “What happened?” Joshua asked. “We talked. Stewart made me expose my boob to him in his office. That’s all there was to it.” Joshua’s eyebrows lifted as he looked at Stewart. “I see why you were so keen to get me over here tonight.” Holly wondered if he felt left out, but it was curiosity more than resentment that he experienced. Stewart seemed intent on pushing things forward. Running his hand under the water, he rested his fingers against her pussy, paddling there. “What was it you enjoyed most about seeing into our private moments?” When Holly didn’t respond, he eased one finger into the groove of her sex, rubbing over the nub of her clitoris. “Go on, spill.” “Oh, well…” Her eyelids lowered. She could barely speak because his touch was so firm and direct and her flesh was extremely sensitive from earlier. When she paused he pulled his finger away and gave her a chastising stare. She moaned. “All of it…it’s so intense.” “The first time you masturbated?” He stroked his finger back and forth. “What were we doing then?” “It was the way you handled him, when you stood behind him. Like the way you did with me, just now. You made him put his hands to the wall, as if you were searching him. That was so hot.” She rolled her eyes. Joshua swore under his breath. Bolts of pure animal lust emanated from the spot where he stood. “You liked that?” Stewart observed her for a moment longer then reached for her hand and drew it down to where his had been. “Touch yourself,” he instructed, “masturbate like you would if you were seeing us having sex.” That commanding air had returned and it made her shiver in anticipation. When she did as instructed and squeezed her pussy in her cupped hand, he rose to his feet. He was completely naked and unashamed. His cock was long and hard and rising up before her eyes. He lifted his tumbler of whisky and swallowed in one go, then he turned his attentions to Joshua. “You heard the lady. She likes to touch herself while

she sees us together.” As he approached Joshua, he wrapped his hand around his erection, massaging it lazily. Joshua cocked his head back, uncertain of his lover’s meaning. Then it dawned on him, and Holly felt it affect him the exact split-second he did. He looked across at her, and his eyes blazed with intensity as he watched her thumbing her clit under the water. Would they really do it for her? Holly’s lips parted with anticipation. Stewart took the glass from his hand and put it on a nearby shelf. When he rested his hand on Joshua’s hip, Joshua turned to face the wall, putting his hands flat to it. Holly let her gaze drift down over the lean, hard strength of his back. Then Stewart stepped in and pushed Joshua’s jockey shorts to the floor. His cock was hard and upright, as if the very suggestion of doing it while she watched had affected him drastically. Stewart ran his hands over Josh’s shoulders and down his back, circuiting his hips before taking Joshua’s cock in his hands. “For your information, Holly, he likes this.” He jerked his hand up and down, and Joshua’s head went back, his eyes closing. “And this is what he finds hard.” He took his hand away. “No touchy,” he added, turning his attention to Joshua’s tight buttocks. Holly laughed softly. She could scarcely believe it. She was lying in her bath masturbating, with a glass of whisky in the other hand, while they were giving her a real live demonstration. “My bathroom will never be the same,” she murmured, dizzy with the decadence of the moment. Joshua had moved his feet wider. “Condom,” Stewart whispered, and was about to turn away. “Bathroom cabinet,” Holly interrupted. “Perfect.” He flashed her a smile as he opened the mirrored door. A few moments later he found condoms and the lube she’d bought to use with the vibrator. Mesmerised, her sex rippling with pleasure, she watched as he rolled on a condom then doused it in lube. “Are you hard?” He asked the question with his mouth close against Joshua’s ear. Joshua’s cock bounced. “Yes.” “Would you like to be jerked off?” “Oh, yes.” “You might get lucky, then again…” He inserted the head of his cock between Joshua’s buttocks—just the head. Holly burned up, because she knew how crazy that’d made her feel. As if that wasn’t enough, the urgent need rising in Joshua filled the bathroom, the erotic tension ratcheting by the moment. She saw his buttocks tighten, saw him rise up on his toes as if he was trying to push things forward. His fingers was splayed against the wall tiles, his eyes flitting to her now and again, before turning away when it was too much of a hot thing to see her watching, touching herself as she did. Stewart pushed just a little bit, then paused. Joshua lifted one hand from the wall and wiped the sweat from his forehead with the back of it, before returning it to the wall. His cock bobbed, the head dark with blood and damp. Holly remembered how it had felt in her mouth. She still had the taste of him there. How desperate would he get, she wondered, if he was unable to touch himself, while Stewart took him in the rear? I think I’m about to find out. Stewart’s hands parted Joshua’s buttocks, and he pressed again, as if requesting entry. Joshua’s lean back arched, and she saw him move, just enough, pressing back. “Oh, fuck,” he blurted as he opened to Stewart. His head lowered, his face barely visible to her as he stared down at his straining cock. Holly moved to a sitting position and drew her knees to her chin. She continued to work herself, two fingers thrusting in and out of her open sex. But the view was so spectacular that she wanted to remember every detail, every part of it—from the urgent need in Joshua’s face as he looked down at his straining member, to the tension in Stewart, who was gripping his lover’s shoulders as he stood his ground, holding back, resisting the urge to plunge deeper until Joshua was ready. Josh lifted his head. As if that was the signal, Stewart eased deeper. “Fuck,” Joshua moaned. “Touch me,” he begged. Stewart smiled. “I am touching you. I’m jerking you off from the inside.” With that he drew back then eased in again, deeper still. Once again Josh removed his hand, wiped his forehead. Stewart locked his hands on Joshua’s hips, controlling him. “Keep those hands on the wall where I can see them.” Again Josh panted loudly. Holly’s sex crushed her fingers on each thrust. Then she imagined what it would be like to be kneeling, to have Josh inside her while he felt this much stimulation. Stewart’s fingers were perilously close to that straining erection. Joshua wanted that hard grip so that he could lose himself. But Stewart used that grip to anchor them both. Holly saw that he almost eased the full-length of his shaft in and out, each time. His movements were smooth, careful and deliberate. “Think you can make it?” Stewart gritted his teeth. She had the feeling he was about to come. “I don’t know,” Joshua blurted, one hand turning into a fist against the wall tiles. “Here, let me help you,” Stewart said. “Look at Holly, look how you are affecting her.” Joshua’s face turned towards her. Acting on it, she latched one foot over the edge of the bath and laid back, pushing her pussy up in the water so that he could see her fingers moving. Stewart nodded in her direction and she saw the absolute control in his expression. He could come any second. Then Joshua made a sound, a garbled cry. Stewart had pushed deep, his body ramrod straight and jerking. Joshua’s whole body shuddered, and he ejaculated. Holly rubbed her clit with her thumb, legs thrashing in the water as she pushed her tender flesh, desperate for relief because of what she’d seen, and finally broke free. Her eyes closed, and when they opened she saw that Stewart had pulled free and that Joshua had turned and kissed his mouth, Stewart’s head held in his hands. It was the perfect seal on what had gone before, because Joshua had loved every moment of his enforced restraint. Even though it turned her on and she’d wanted to see it more than anything in the world, it reminded her of something. They were together. They were the couple. She was the outsider floating in the bath, watching from afar.

**** The following morning Holly returned from the bathroom and paused in the doorway of her bedroom. Stewart and Joshua were in her double bed, naked and sleeping. There was a dent at Stewart’s side where she had extracted herself moments before. She smiled to herself as she thought about all

the times she’d been driven mad by them, alone in that bed, and now they were in it. It wasn’t anything she ever thought she would see, and yet they looked so comfortable it was a shame to wake them. She’d not even slept, and the two men had only been asleep for an hour or so, a cat nap brought on by exhaustion after a night spent lovemaking and chatting. Soon Stewart would have to be on his way to the gym, and she had mere seconds before the alarm clock went off. She rested one shoulder up against the doorframe and took those precious moments to observe them both. Stewart was on his back, one arm behind his head. His muscular chest rose and fell as he breathed deep. The quilt covered him from the waist down. In repose, his usually rugged features seemed almost classical. As she watched, Joshua rolled over, his arm going around Stewart’s waist. Holly thought it would wake them both, but it didn’t. Instinctively, Stewart moved his hand and wrapped it around Joshua’s shoulder, holding Joshua against his chest. A moment later they were both dozing heavily again. Seeing them that way—so familiar, so obviously in love and united as a couple—made Holly feel isolated again. Nothing had really changed. She’d made her big confession and they’d had sex again, amazing sex, but they were in love. The knowledge knifed through her, destroying an impossible dream that she hadn’t even been aware of having before that moment. Her experiences with them had been life-altering, but they were the couple and she was the outsider. They had taken her into their embrace for mutual pleasure. She didn’t regret it, never would, but as she looked at them she felt like an intruder in her own home. A hard knot of emotion formed in her chest. She knew without a shadow of a doubt that she was in danger of becoming the owner of a broken heart. Doubly broken. Her affection for both men had grown deep and rich. It was time for some serious risk assessment. Surely she had taken enough chances? Enough for all three of them. It was time to back off and let them carry on with their lives. After all, she had only complicated things for Joshua. The momentary pleasure of the sex was a great panacea for his troubled mind, but it was fleeting. What he really needed was stability and order. She only confused matters for him. It was time to pull back. As if he sensed her attention, Joshua lifted his head from Stewart’s chest and opened his eyes. A lazy smile lit his expression. “Time to get up?” “Yes, up, up and away,” she said, forcing a bright smile. The alarm went off at that very moment, the clock radio clicking on. A busy traffic commentary filled the room and Stewart’s head jerked up from the pillow. He blinked in confusion as he looked around, quite obviously bewildered by the strange room filled with feminine fripperies. Holly turned to her wardrobe, rifling through it for a fresh uniform, grateful for the chance to blink away her testing emotions.

Chapter Fifteen

Fifteen minutes later Stewart was ready to leave their own flat, where he had hurriedly dressed and grabbed his daily smoothie from the fridge. It was way past time to leave and he was going to have to drink it on the way. He paused and stuck his head in the bedroom door. Joshua was standing there in jockey shorts and shirt, doing up his tie. “Well?” Stewart asked. Joshua’s cheeks tensed then he sighed and abandoned his tie, resting his hands on his hips. “Yes, you were right. I’m obviously bi. Happy now?” “If you are, I am.” “Maybe we could talk about it, tonight?” Joshua looked at him, tentatively. “Sure.” Stewart gestured at Joshua’s feet with his smoothie bottle. “Oh, by the way, your socks don’t match, shame on you.” He winked, grinned, and without saying another word he headed out to work.

**** As soon as Holly could grab a private moment between clients, she called Faye. “Hey, Holly, are things getting any easier for you over there?” “Yes and no.” It struck her then that ‘yes and no’ seemed to be the common feature of the last few days. “Yes and no,” Stewart had said to her when she’d thought they were both gay. And now she was saying it. Things had got better, she’d unburdened herself, but they really weren’t any better at all. Not long term, not for her. “I’m sorry to hear that. Anything I can do for you?” “Yes, I was wondering…did you ever read any more about that Zen thing we talked about?” “Oh, so you’re interested now?” “Faye, have a heart. I’m in a bad way here.” “Okay, okay. Actually, I did. It’s really interesting stuff.” Holly rolled her eyes. “If you get hooked on this Zen thing don’t try to blame me after the event.” “Why not? It would be your fault.” Faye’s laughter did not soothe Holly’s troubled mind. Right now she felt as if a lot of things were ‘her fault’ and it was all about damage limitation from here on in. “Right, thanks. Did you find anything that might explain my situation?” “No, but there’s a lot of mysticism in what I’ve read. Things just are.” “That’s typical.” “Well, a lot of life is like that. It’s like the way our grandmother was psychic, but our mother isn’t and we are. No clue as to why. It just is.” “Genetics, perhaps. Let’s hope it skips again and our kids don’t have the issues we’ve had.” “Oh, so you’re thinking about having children now? These guys really have caught your attention.” Faye’s laughter tinkled at the other end of the phone. The knot in Holly’s chest tightened. “Far from it. In fact I’m thinking I’m going to be single for a long time after this.” Faye quietened. “Oh no, things haven’t got that bad have they? They haven’t been…mean to you?” Holly could hear the defensive tone growing in Faye’s voice. It was their special sisterly bond, the one that meant they protected each other’s psychic secrets. “No, nothing like that. It’s just that they are a couple, and if I don’t back away soon I’m going to get very hurt.” “Ah, I see. You’re falling in love.” “Yes, but who wants to be in love while playing gooseberry?” “Not an ideal situation, I agree. What are you going to do about it?” “I’m going to give notice on the flat, move into Monica’s place.” “I’ll help you pack.” “Thanks, I might take you up on that.” “Call me when you need me.” When Holly put the phone down, she didn’t feel any better, but she had a plan and that meant she could move forward. She looked at her bookings. Two clients after lunch, then she could cut loosely for the day.

**** Josh glanced at his watch and jogged down the pavement towards the flats. He’d left work early because his new bicycle was due to be delivered in the next two-hour window. The order had gone in online the day before. Just when he’d been thinking he’d never find one he wanted as much as his previous bike—the one that had been demolished in the accident—a featured bike in his cycling magazine caught his attention and he’d ordered one straight from the manufacturer. Luckily there was no sign of the delivery truck outside the flats, and he ran up the steps and into the reception hallway, where he intended to hover expectantly. Once inside, he took up his position by the glass doors and watched the traffic. He was eager to receive the delivery so he could jack in the Tube trips, and didn’t want to risk going upstairs to the flat. Taking off his tie he folded it into his pocket then undid his top two buttons. As he watched the traffic filter past, he heard a door being knocked and the low hum of voices nearby. At first he didn’t pay any attention. Then he caught the sound of a familiar voice. Holly? Curious, he glanced over his shoulder. There were six flats on the ground floor, and they were accessed by a corridor that ran off the reception area from behind the staircase. The sounds were coming from that direction. Taking another quick glance outside, where there was still no sign of the delivery truck, he walked towards the access point. When he glanced down the corridor he saw Holly outside one of the doors, chatting to a mature gentleman who stood in the doorway. He didn’t recognise the man, but he remembered her saying that her landlord lived on the ground floor. Moving to a midway spot where he could still see the front doorway, he planned to catch her when she came by. She must have come home early from work too. He wondered why. Curiosity was getting the better of him. Craning his neck, he tried to catch what they were talking about. Bits of the conversation drifted out to him. As soon as he heard her mention giving notice on her flat, he was back at the end of the corridor straining to catch the rest of the conversation.

“I appreciate you saying that, Jim, but I’ll be moving out quite soon. My sister’s going abroad for a few months with her job so I’m going to live in her place while she is gone. I’m aware that I have to give a month’s notice, that’s fair enough, but I’ll be packing up from today. I’ll let you know as soon as I’m done and I’ll get the keys back to you so you can get it on the market.” Josh was stunned. She hadn’t said anything about moving out. She had mentioned that the flat was too big since her flatmate moved on, but surely she would have mentioned it to them? It’s because of me, us, because of what happened. Had to be. He had to fight hard to resist the urge to shout down the corridor and tell her that she couldn’t move out. He wouldn’t allow it. Stewart would be gutted. He was. He felt as if he had been punched repeatedly and without warning. Restlessly, he paced the reception area. Taking off his jacket, he hung it on the handrail at the end of the staircase. Emotion welled up inside him. He didn’t want her to go. “Joshua.” It was Holly, and one look at her face informed him that she had felt his mood and sought him out because of it. “You’re upset.” “Of course I’m bloody upset. I overheard.” His mood was not improving. Looking at her made him feel possessive. It made him angry that she hadn’t told them. “What were you going to do, just leave?” She shook her head. “I was going to talk to you about it this evening.” “What, after the event? You’ve already given notice.” He had to press his lips together tightly to avoid saying more. Instead he strode over to her and took her by the shoulders, fuelled by the need to hang on to her physically. Looking deep into her eyes, he silently pleaded with her to reconsider, using their special link to hold her attention. “Josh, please…” Her response came out on a strangled breath. His mood was affecting hers. He’d never get used to that, but he wanted to try. “I have to do it. It’s too much for me.” “The psychic thing?” “Yes and no.” She gave a sudden frustrated sigh and shook her head. Her eyes glistened with withheld tears. “You two are a couple, and I don’t want to make anything more difficult for you than it already is.” “You don’t make things difficult, you make them better.” He blurted it out, but once it was said he realised it was the truth. She had made things better. Like the missing piece of the jigsaw that made him feel whole in a way that he never had before. “Holly, I need you both.” She shook her head, determined it seemed to stick to the path she had secretly carved out for her future. Fuming, he gripped her tighter still, drawing her closer to him. Surely Stewart wouldn’t want her to go, would he? Uncertainty prickled at the back of his neck. “Don’t do it, please Holly.” Her lips parted, but she didn’t speak. It was his mood, she felt his anger and his uncertainty and she was hurting. It was inside her and it was tearing her apart as much as it was him. That possessive response flared again. He pressed his mouth to hers. At first she resisted, then her lips parted. She gave a small captured sound then rested her hands against his chest. When he reached for them he found them fisted. Frustration boiled up inside him. She pulled away, gasping. “Delivery for Joshua Dawson?” The voice at his back threw Joshua. When he looked over his shoulder he saw the delivery guy standing there with his PDA in one hand, the door held open with the other. He was waiting for confirmation. Josh gave him a wave, and in the background he saw another delivery man manoeuvring the box. “It’s your new bike,” Holly said. Irritated by the hovering delivery man and interruption, Joshua gave a deep sigh. “Go and sort your delivery out.” Holly nodded her head. “I have to get on.” Get on? She was pulling away again. Joshua wanted to tell the delivery guys to take the bloody bike back and leave him alone, but she was stepping away, and she nodded as if she understood. “You promise you’ll come over as soon as Stewart gets home?” “I’ll come over to yours around seven. How’s that?” That was hours away. She really was planning to pack up today. “It’ll have to do.” Unrepentant, he let her feel the full weight of his unhappiness. “Please don’t, Josh,” she whispered, her eyes rounding, then she turned away and darted for the stairs. Josh grabbed the handrail, on the verge of going after her. But he was afraid he would push her away. He needed Stewart’s cool head. Most of all, he needed Stewart to show his hand.

Chapter Sixteen

When Stewart got home, the door to the flat was wedged open by a massive cardboard box. Squeezing past it, he found Josh in the sitting room, perched on the edge of the sofa, staring at the door as if he was waiting for his arrival. “I thought you’d have had that open and assembled by now,” Stewart commented, nodding his head back at the package that was half in and half out of the flat. “Why isn’t the new beloved in here already?” Joshua rose to his feet, and he looked tense. “You’re late.” “Yes, problem at the gym. Two of the guys who offer personal training decided to cut their hours back at once, which leaves us short. I was re-jigging the schedules.” It was then he noticed how wired Josh looked, and he hadn’t changed out of his city gear, which was unusual. “I texted you.” “Must have forgotten to switch my phone back on after my last client.” Something was seriously amiss. He lifted his eyebrows. “Am I in trouble?” “We’re both in trouble. Holly is moving out.” Stewart jerked his head back, astonished. “What? Since when?” “Today. She gave notice to her landlord this afternoon. I only found out because I had to be here for the delivery and overheard. She’s coming here at seven, I insisted, but I think we’re too late to change her mind.” Staggered by the unexpected news Stewart struggled to put it in place. “Did she say why?” “Oh yeah.” Joshua’s eyes were bright, his intense emotions giving him an edgy look. “It’s because we’re a couple.” Josh gestured wildly with his hands, obviously frustrated. He paced back and forth. “What the hell? She knew that, why would that make her move out?” Stewart frowned. There was more to it, had to be. “Stay cool, let’s think it through.” Joshua looked at him with that pleading expression, the one that normally made him want to do depraved things to him. This time, however, it was emotional but it was about the three of them and not just the two of them. It was all about the three of them, now. Stewart knew that, but did Joshua? “Do you think she feels threatened, because we’re a couple?” Joshua asked. “No, I don’t think she feels threatened.” “What then?” “Joshua, what do you want from this? How would you feel if she moved out?” “Gutted.” No hesitation. Stewart smiled. “My guess is she needs to know that.” “I tried to tell her that. Bloody hell, she could feel what I was feeling, but it just seemed to make her back off.” “What were you feeling?” “That I didn’t want to let her go.” “Anything else?” Joshua scrubbed at his head, frowning heavily. “I felt sure you wouldn’t want her to go either.” “No, I don’t want her to go,” he paused, allowing that one to sink in, “but were you sure…when you thought about my reaction?” Joshua’s eyes flitted from side to side. “Maybe not.” Stewart bit back the urge to shout at him. Deep down he felt Josh should have known, but perhaps he hadn’t communicated his feelings about their relationship with Holly well enough. They had form, when it came to misunderstanding each other. It was Holly who helped them with that, and that made him even keener to keep her in their lives. “Perhaps—if she felt your hesitation—she’s afraid that she’s going to split us apart. She wouldn’t want that. She’s always been about the pair of us together, that’s what did it for her.” “Okay, so I was a mess. But she’d already given notice.” Stewart nodded. One thing was clear, they needed to talk, the three of them. “What are we going to do?” Joshua asked. “What do you want from this?” “I want it to be like it was. I want the three of us to be together.” Stewart smiled and nodded. Meeting his gaze Joshua stilled, calmed. They understood each other, finally. They both wanted Holly in their lives together. “We need to tell her that. She needs to know it from both us.” He glanced at his watch. It wasn’t even six yet, but he saw no reason to wait.

**** Trying to pack cases and boxes while Joshua’s chaotic emotions crashed against her in unruly waves from the flat next door was a torturous experience. Holly wandered from shelf to shelve without logic, eager to be done and some place where she could think clearly and see the path she was meant to take in life. She’d become so bound up with them, so emotionally involved with them that she was a mess. And yet the thought of being without them made her even worse. Before long she’d started blubbing every few minutes, and had to carry a box of tissues with her wherever she went. Pausing to look at her reflection in the bathroom, she saw a mascara-streaked woman with puffy pink eyes. Her shoulders drooped. How could it have got so out of control? A few days of good sex with two gorgeous men had apparently left her a snivelling wreck. Just then the incessant tides of chaotic emotion she felt from Joshua slowed, and somehow broke apart. She turned her head, staring in the direction of their flat. Had he begun to get over it? Had Stewart come home and told him to buck up? Joshua’s attention sharpened, then locked on her. “Oh, shit!” They were on their way over here. A moment later, there was a knock at the door. She rubbed her face with a tissue then threw the box aside as she darted through the flat to answer the door. Stewart was leaning up against the frame when she opened it. He shook his head at her. “Sorry to have to say this, but you look dreadful.” He pulled her to him and kissed her forehead. His hands on her shoulders felt so good, so reassuring, just as they always did. It’s just his strength, don’t be fooled, it doesn’t represent security. You just wish that it did. “Let’s get this sorted, shall we?” His thumbs rubbed at her affectionately as he looked down into her eyes. “I have to move away—” He put one finger to her lips, hushing her. Then he walked on into her sitting room.

Joshua was close behind him. Tensions still marked his expression, but it was focussed. Level and calm, he closed the door, put one arm around her shoulder and led her into the sitting room where Stewart waited. “This will make it harder,” she murmured. “No, it won’t,” Stewart said. Joshua took a deep breath and cleared his throat. “I don’t want you to move out, neither of us do.” Holly stared at him, open-mouthed. He was determined to reach his goal, a goal that he had no intention of being elbowed away from. He was taking control of the situation. He glanced at Stewart. “I know I can speak for both of us when I say you make us even better together. The thought of not seeing you every day… well, we both think that it’s just plain wrong.” Holly looked at Stewart. He nodded at her. They wanted to continue this three-way relationship? Struggling to come to terms with the crucial meaning of the declaration, she grappled for a sensible response. “But, I’ve given notice on my flat.” “Then move in with us,” Stewart said. “It’s where we want you to be. The three of us, not a couple and one person, but three lovers, together.” Never before had she seen them this united in purpose. What they’d said made her feel weak, her legs like water under her. They wanted it to go on, they both did. “I can’t.” Stewart stared at her. “Is it because you think you’ll split us up?” “No, no way. You two are perfect together, that wouldn’t happen.” “Why then?” “Because I’m falling for you,” she blurted. “Because I care too much.” “But that’s great news.” Stewart’s eyes shone. He broke into a smile. “Holly, we’ve both fallen for you. We need you.” “We have a spare room,” Joshua said, pushing it forward. “You could move in as a flat share if that suits you. Come willingly, don’t come under pressure.” The wall of self-protection that she had hauled into place to hide behind was crumbling, but she tried to rebuild it, instinct forcing her to do so. “We hardly know each other. What if it went wrong?” “We know more than enough to try.” Stewart stared at her. “Do you really want to say goodbye, do you? Be honest.” He held her gaze in that way of his, his will so subtle yet so sure. Emotion swelled, then broke through the dam. She shook her head. As she did so, she felt dampness on her cheeks and realised that she was crying again. Joshua patted the back of an armchair and indicated she should sit down. She slumped into it and watched as the two men sprang into action. Joshua located the box of tissues she had dropped and brought them to her. He squatted down in front of her as she blew her nose, loudly. “Thank you,” she whispered. “What do I feel?” He asked the question while he held her gaze. Warm waves of affection washed over her. Her bottom lip trembled again. “See?” She nodded. Stewart had disappeared next door and returned with a bottle of Champagne. “I hope you don’t mind. We had this in and neither of us fancied your Irish liqueur.” He gave her a cheeky grin. “No, I don’t mind,” she said. Is this real? Surrounded by half-packed boxes and her life in a tangled mess, she’d buckled. Now, watching the two of them oscillate around her space with such certainty they were all that did seem real, and she grasped hold of it, watching as they took over. “I’ll put it in the fridge to chill.” Meanwhile, Joshua rose to his feet, pulled his phone out of his pocket and opened it up. When Stewart got back he indicated that he should sit down as well. Joshua remained standing. “I asked you for proof,” he said to Holly, “to prove your connection with me. I’m going to give you proof now, both of you,” he included Stewart by nodding in his direction, “of how much I want this, the three of us.” “Are you sure about this?” Stewart asked. Puzzled, Holly observed. Then she gasped, because Joshua’s intentions reached her. He seemed amused by that. “Yes, I’m sure. It’s time.” He dialled the number. “Hello, Mum, it’s Joshua.” Both Stewart and Holly stared his way. He nodded at them and continued. “How is it going? Any new wedding problems?” He shook his head at them. “That’s good to hear, I’m glad everything is under control.” His mother spoke. “Yes, there was something else. I wanted to ask you a question. You know what you said about Uncle Ted being in a polyamorous relationship…or whatever it was…were you and Dad seriously okay with that?” Holly and Stewart observed Joshua’s face as he listened to the voice on the other end of the phone. Holly sensed his calmness, his readiness to address whatever the response was. His problems had mounted up, but it was time to clear the decks and he was ready. Joshua’s eyebrows drew together then separated. He lifted his head and looked across at them both, then he switched his phone to speaker. Holly could scarcely breathe. He wanted them both to hear what was said. He really wanted to prove something. “Yes,” he said, once he was sure that they were both listening, “this is about Stewart and Holly.” Holly glanced at Stewart quickly, she couldn’t help it. He was tense too, both of them willing everything to turn out okay for Joshua. “I thought as much,” said Mrs Dawson. “How did you know?” Joshua replied. “I had an inkling, but I wasn’t sure. Once I realised that Stewart hadn’t slept in the guest room on Saturday night I was pretty sure.” She gave a hearty chuckle into the phone. Both Holly and Joshua looked at Stewart, whose eyebrows shot up. “Oh, shit,” he said, “I forgot all about that. Meant to go back and rumple the bed.” Holly had never seen him blush, but he was genuinely embarrassed. For some reason it made her smile. Meanwhile Joshua was scratching his head, but his expression had already brightened considerably. “And you’re all right about it, I mean about me being involved with two people, a woman and a man?”

“Joshua, we didn’t know what to make of your Uncle Ted, of course we were shocked. But that was back then, when all this kind of thing was shocking. It’s different nowadays.” Joshua looked at his lovers and shook his head, like he couldn’t quite believe her nonchalance on the subject “Son, life is not easy, and long-term relationships with one person have their ups and downs, no matter how much you love each other. If you can find two people you can openly be happy with, that’s much better than being in a relationship that feels incomplete, and going behind each other’s backs having affairs. I mean…have you seen some of the things that go on?” The tone of her voice changed dramatically, turning both conspiratorial and avidly agog. “Some of these chat shows on daytime television can be a real eye-opener on human nature. Since your father retired, he’s got me hooked on them.” Joshua’s jaw dropped. Holly had to press her lips together to stop herself from laughing aloud. Stewart didn’t even bother trying to hold back. He laughed, then let out a sigh of relief, stretching in his chair as if he’d been tense too long. Before Joshua had a chance to respond, his mother was off again. “Anyway I want to hear all about it and how it happened, but right now we have to go and collect the cake and I need all my faculties together for that. If your father drops it Donna will never forgive us. See you at the weekend. You’re all coming, right?” Joshua looked at them quickly, and they both nodded their acknowledgement. Stewart reached for Holly’s hand and kissed it, squeezing her fingers, conveying to her how happy he was. “We’re all coming,” Joshua replied, with a grin. When he put the phone down, he was still smiling. “It’s going to be okay. Everything is going to be okay.” “You didn’t have to do that for me,” Holly said. “I did. I had to do it for both of you, no matter what the outcome, because I love you, both of you.”

Epilogue

The stone-built church where Donna and Will’s ceremony was being held was as pretty as a picture. White satin sashes decorated the end of each polished wooden pew, and massive flower displays stood either side of the altar. The seats were already half full when they arrived, the guests chattering in low voices as they waited for the ceremony to begin. Holly was so nervous she almost felt as if she were the bride as she walked down the aisle. The presence of two men, one on either side of her, helped shake that odd notion off. The nerves were because Mrs Dawson knew about the three of them, and probably Mr Dawson too, by now. Would her initial positive reaction have turned into something else? Joshua had been determined to tell her—and damn the consequences—but now they were here it wasn’t quite so easy to dismiss the last few doubts. Kyle, Joshua’s younger brother, swaggered along in his dapper morning suit as he led the way and gestured into the second row of pews. “Are you sure we should be sitting here and not farther back?” Joshua asked. “Yes,” Kyle replied with an air of authority. “All three of you are to be seated right behind the parents on our side.” He gave them a cheeky grin as he observed the three of them hovering there together. Holly and Stewart exchanged glances. It was pretty obvious the lad knew something. Had Mrs Dawson told the family already? Warning them, perhaps? Holly was surprised. Then again it was Kyle who’d made the gay comment. By the time they got seated, the vicar arrived and hovered expectantly at the side of the altar. It was almost time. Stewart peered at the vicar. “I wonder if he does marriages for three.” “Stewart.” Holly nudged him and glanced around to make sure no one else had heard, blushing as she did so. Joshua wasn’t bothered by it though. “Is that even legal?” “Why not?” Stewart responded. “Everything else is these days.” Joshua gave a wry laugh. “Hark at the old man.” A moment later his parents arrived to take their seats in the row in front. As soon as they sat down, they both turned to chat, resting one elbow along the back of their seat. Mr Dawson gave his son an assessing look, but it was with gratitude that Holly saw no bad feeling in it. “So you took after your Uncle Ted, did you?” Joshua shuffled his feet and leant forward. “Dad, please, we’re in a church for goodness sake.” “Who’s the old man now?” Stewart commented under his breath. Mrs Dawson waved her hand dismissively. “We’ve had exciting sex too, you know, it’s not just something your generation do.” “Mother!” Holly barely stifled a giggle. When Mrs Dawson looked her way, smiling fondly at her, Holly thought she’d better comment. “Joshua is so pleased with your reaction to his news. He’s just surprised at how well you’re taking it.” Joshua’s mother looked at Holly with shining eyes. “You know him that well already…that’s so wonderful.” Holly realised what she’d done. She’d conveyed Joshua’s thoughts. But instead of denying it, she nodded. “Yes. Yes, I do.” The sound of the bridal march started up, and all conversation ceased, everyone straightening their clothes and rising to their feet. Holly, Stewart and Joshua stood up in unison. The men either side of her held her hands tighter still and emotion buoyed up inside Holly. “Marry us,” Stewart whispered provocatively, just loud enough for both of them to hear. “I don’t care if it’s legal or not, I think we should do it.” “Stewart,” Holly chastised, but she couldn’t keep the smile off her face. She nodded her head down the aisle, where the bride had appeared. “We’ll discuss it another time.” On her other side, Joshua slipped his arm around her waist and kissed her on the cheek. “I love you,” he whispered. “But you knew that already, didn’t you?” “Yes, yes I did.” No yes and no. Not this time. “Then do as Stewart says and marry us, you know it makes sense.” Humour filled his expression. “Is that even legal?” she asked. “Who cares?” he responded. “Let’s do it.”

About the Author I’m British by birth, but because of my parents’ nomadic tendencies I grew up travelling the globe—an only child with a serious book habit. I dreamt of being a writer since the age of twelve and finally began writing seriously in the late 1990s. By that time I’d got myself a BA in Art History, a Masters in Literature and the Visual Arts, and I’d worked in all manner of diverse careers—but the stories in my head simply had to be written. My first erotic short story was published by Virgin publishing’s Black Lace imprint in ‘97 and things really took off from there. Every spare moment was spent on the stories that bubbled away in my imagination. I’ve now had work published in over forty anthologies, including Best Women’s Erotica, The Mammoth Book of Best New Erotica and the Black Lace Wicked Words series. It was such a thrill for me to find that readers enjoyed my stories. I started working on longer projects around 2003, and since then I’ve had work published by US publishers Harlequin Spice, Red Sage, Penguin Heat, and the Juno Books fantasy line. I’m very happy to be part of the team at Total-E-Bound. Nowadays I live in the north of England—close to the beautiful, windswept landscape of the Yorkshire moors—with my real life hero, Mark. Mark supports my work through all its ups and downs, and somehow manages to keep me sane and grounded when fiction threatens to take over. Email: [email protected] Saskia loves to hear from readers. You can find her contact information, website and author biography at http://www.total-e-bound.com.

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