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CHAOS & COMMUNION …Emma reached for her shirt, while Gideon strode forward and started turning off the added lights. Jesse didn’t rise from his chair, but the way he kept making a fist, turning his arm this way and that, made Gideon smile. The tattoos had been excellent idea. Even if the air hadn’t been ripe with their lust, seeing the fascinated light in Jesse’s eye was more than worth it. “Do I really have to put my shirt back on?” Emma said. “No. I’d just tear it getting it off you again.” He looked at Jesse, who was still sitting in his chair. “Do you like it?” The look in Jesse’s eyes made anything he could have said redundant. “It’s…I love it.” Gideon crouched in front of him, grasping him lightly by the wrist. Letting his fingertips graze over the tattoo, he only glanced up briefly at Jesse before bending forward and skimming his tongue over the hot skin. Jesse sharply sucked in his breath, and he stiffened. Gideon knew each of Jesse’s reactions, and he knew Jesse didn’t want him to stop, didn’t want Gideon to move away from him. He whispered Gideon’s name, his voice strained and full of longing. Gideon tightened his fingers until Jesse’s pulse hammered into him. “You and Emma are everything to me. But I think I need to make sure you don’t forget that.” Without looking away, he called Emma’s name, waiting until she’d risen from the table and come to his side before adding, “Go to the cupboard and bring me the gloves and the white rope.”

ALSO BY JAMIE CRAIG At The Advent Of Dusk Fortune’s Honor Keeping Time A Little Bit Bewitched The Master Chronicles Book I: Master Of Obsidian Book II: Unveiled Book III: Mosaic Moon Book IV: Seduction In Black And White Book V: Chaos & Communion Calendar Boys January: Miami’s Perfect Weekend February: Mine March: Kiss Me April: Out Of The Storm

CHAOS & COMMUNION BY JAMIE CRAIG

AMBER Q UILL PRESS, LLC http://www.AmberQuill.com

CHAOS & COMMUNION AN AMBER QUILL PRESS BOOK This book is a work of fiction. All names, characters, locations, and incidents are products of the author’s imagination, or have been used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons living or dead, locales, or events is entirely coincidental. Amber Quill Press, LLC http://www.AmberQuill.com All rights reserved. No portion of this book may be transmitted or reproduced in any form, or by any means, without permission in writing from the publisher, with the exception of brief excerpts used for the purposes of review. Copyright © 2008 by Pepper Espinoza & Vivien Dean ISBN 978-1-60272-222-4 Cover Art © 2008 Trace Edward Zaber

Layout and Formatting provided by: Elemental Alchemy

PUBLISHED IN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA

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CHAPTER 1 The nightmares didn’t just come when he slept. Nobody ever told Jesse about the sort of nightmares that could hit you in the middle of the day, in the middle of some task. Everything would be normal and then he would be stuck in a small, windowless room, his arms stretched above his head, his skin broken and bleeding. These moments weren’t just particularly vivid memories. He was there. He was in the room again. He was struggling to breathe. There was no world except this world of agony and no escape except through the locked door. After the first one had left him winded, shaking, huddled at his desk, he tried to research his symptoms. Flashbacks. But a 1

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flashback seemed so innocuous. Flashbacks were what old hippies got after years of dropping acid. Jesse refused to think of the events as flashbacks. They were waking nightmares, and they could hit him at any time. There was never any warning, never a triggering event. And he couldn’t control them. Avoiding the other sort of nightmare—the regular nightmare—was easy enough. He just stopped sleeping. But that wasn’t enough to completely thwart the terror. Jesse dropped his forehead to his desk and gasped for breath, trying to slow his racing pulse. His lungs burned each time he inhaled, and his skin felt sweaty and tight. Everything felt sweaty and tight. He needed fresh air. He needed to get out of the small office. He needed help. He needed to pull himself together because Emma would be back from the museum soon, and Gideon would be up at dusk, ready to take out a nest of demons down by the docks. And he would expect Jesse to have the research done and the suitable weapons gathered, because they already knew enough to know that regular metal swords and axes wouldn’t penetrate their hides. Which meant he only had about ninety minutes to figure out what would kill the demons, and then track down whatever weapon Gideon needed, if they didn’t already own it. Once it no longer felt like his heart was trying to escape through his ribs, he sat up, wiping a hand over his face. His cheeks were flushed, and it felt like he had a fever. He stood on legs he didn’t altogether trust and walked over to the water cooler. A drink would help his dry mouth and throat. A drink 2

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would give him a few more seconds before he had to get back to work. He ignored the way his fingers trembled as he filled the paper cup with water. Shaking fingers were the least of his problems. By the time he made it back to his desk, everything was almost back to normal. Or as normal as things got these days. By some act of providence, neither Gideon nor Emma had ever witnessed one of his nightmares, or one of his panic attacks. Part of that was because they were both busy. Emma had been promoted and she often worked more than forty hours a week. Gideon had likewise thrown himself into work, attacking the demon population in Chicago with an almost frightening vigor. Part of that was because Jesse was good at keeping himself busy and avoiding spending time alone with them. He didn’t know why, but he didn’t want them to know that he was haunted. It was over. It was behind them. He shouldn’t be experiencing it every day. They were all ready to move on. Unfortunately, it wasn’t that easy, and Jesse didn’t quite understand why. The ringing telephone sent his pulse racing again, and he snatched it from the cradle, if only to silence it. “Gideon Investigations.” “Hello, this is a courtesy call for Gideon Keel from American Electric.” “Yes?” Jesse knew why they were calling. There was no reason to get Gideon involved. “We’re just calling to inform you that your power bill is 3

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now two weeks late. I’ll be more than happy to take your payment now with your credit or debit card.” Jesse looked at the stack of unopened envelopes on his desk. He had no doubt the power bill was there. It was his job to pay the utilities and keep the office running smoothly. It had always been his job. “I’ll pay it now.” He fumbled his own credit card out of his wallet, though he was supposed to use the office’s bank account. If this were the first time he had simply forgotten to pay the bills, he wouldn’t have hesitated to use Gideon’s card. But it wasn’t the first time. Or even the second time. And the last thing he wanted was to leave a paper trail of his mistakes. It was just a matter of time until Gideon discovered all of his mistakes anyway. As he hung up the phone, he heard the unmistakable sound of Gideon showering. He frowned. That couldn’t be right. He didn’t expect to see Gideon until at least six and it was only… Jesse frowned and looked at his watch. A quarter to six. Where had the last hour gone? He stared at the stack of books and his notebook with a familiar sense of helplessness. He had promised Gideon he would have the research done, the weapons prepared, and he had nothing. He couldn’t even remember reading the damned books, but he was sure he had. He could tell Gideon he needed more time, but what if Gideon wanted to know why? For as often as he lost time—an hour or two completely gone from his memory wasn’t uncommon—he should have a convincing excuse on hand. But he didn’t. 4

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Six months. Six months since Marcus Brooker had kidnapped him, tortured him, filled his head with stories and lies and death. His body was as healed as it would ever be— though the scars weren’t going anywhere. Not without major cosmetic surgery. Everything else was back to normal. And everything else was wrong all the time. Jesse’s fingers didn’t want to cooperate, but he forced them to close around the pen, then turned back to the book he must have been reading before. He didn’t remember for sure, but it was the one that was still open on his desk. When the footsteps came, he deliberately didn’t look up. I’m utterly absorbed in my reading, he tried to wordlessly convey. He even turned a page, hoping that would convince Gideon. “When did it start snowing again?” “Snowing?” Jesse glanced out the window, staring at the fat, white flakes in surprise. “I’m not sure.” He tried to think of any reliable markers during his day. The post always arrived around one, and when he opened the door to speak to the deliveryman, it hadn’t been snowing. “After lunch, I guess.” Gideon crossed the room in long strides, folding his arms over his chest as he stared out over the city. The glass was starting to frost from the cold, a reminder that Jesse hadn’t turned the thermostat up that morning as was his routine, but Gideon blocked most of it from view. His hair was still damp from the shower, razor-short except where it flopped over his brow, and the shirt he wore strained over his back. He looked 5

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broader than usual. Jesse wasn’t sure why. “Well, we won’t have to worry about the nest tonight, at least,” Gideon mused aloud. “Those things will be hunkered in against the storm.” Jesse couldn’t contain his sigh of relief. Researching wasn’t impossible by any means, but reading was always more difficult after an attack. He understood maybe one word out of five. He’d simply tackle the problem the next morning. “Are you going to go out tonight, then?” “Depends. When is Emma supposed to be home?” Emma was in the habit of sharing a cup of coffee with him in the morning before she left for work. For whatever reason, he could always recall the details of the quiet conversations they shared then. “She told me eight. Or eight-thirty. It depends on if she stops somewhere to pick up dinner.” Gideon seemed to give up on snowgazing and came back to lounge in the corner of the couch. No matter how many times Jesse saw him, or laid in bed watching him, or fell asleep where the last thing he saw were the two people he loved most in this world, Jesse felt Gideon’s attraction like a blow to his chest. The strong nose, jaw, the dark eyes that could go black with desire in a single blink, or better, turn golden and gleam with hunger Jesse sated best. Sometimes looking at Gideon was taking a drink of the clearest water for an unquenchable thirst. It was exactly what he needed, desired, and only made him want more. “Is she getting something for you, too?” Gideon asked. “Or would you like me to make you something since it looks like 6

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we’ll be in for a while?” Jesse almost said I’m not hungry, but those words were all but verboten. Gideon basically acted as though he didn’t hear them, and food would magically appear in front of Jesse whether he wanted it or not. “She’s going to bring me a roast beef from the deli.” Jesse sat back in his chair and let his gaze move over the lines of Gideon’s body once again. He knew he was too tired to stay at his desk, but he didn’t want to go downstairs and leave Gideon in the office. Despite everything, he wasn’t really in the mood to be alone. “Can we…I think I’m done up here for the day. Can we lock the office up?” For a moment, he thought he saw Gideon’s mouth tighten, but the moment quickly passed, and Gideon was rising to his feet again. “We can both lie down,” he said. “We haven’t had much time to do that together lately when one of us hasn’t been dead to the world.” Jesse almost balked. He didn’t want to lie down, because he didn’t want to risk falling asleep. But at the same time, he didn’t want to lose this opportunity. Gideon was right. It felt like the quiet time they had together bordered on nonexistent. “Okay. But didn’t you just wake up?” He smiled. “Who said anything about sleeping?” Jesse returned his smile, his fingertips tingling with anticipation. For the first time that day, he felt like he actually had some energy and focus. There were some things Jesse knew they couldn’t do—and he couldn’t dwell on that fact 7

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because it made everything that much worse—but that didn’t mean everything was out of bounds. “Do you want me to shut down everything up here, or do you want me to go downstairs?” Gideon held out a hand to him. “Leave it. I’ve missed my boy.” I’ve missed you, too. For a moment, Jesse was tempted to tell him everything. He was tempted to tell him about the bills he never remembered to pay, and the research he couldn’t bring himself to do, and the minutes and hours he lost every day. Jesse took his hand and let Gideon lead him downstairs into the dark apartment. The space had gone through so many changes since the first time Gideon had brought him there. First, it had shown the signs of Jesse’s residence, and now little hints and pieces of Emma covered the room. But despite what they added to the apartment, Gideon’s personal touch never faded. Gideon guided him into the bedroom, and Jesse hesitated for a moment when he saw the bed. He knew now he wouldn’t be able to avoid sleeping, but maybe Gideon would stay with him. Usually, that helped. Gideon’s hand disappeared from his, to return in gentle strokes along Jesse’s spine. “Strip.” The order was low and soothing, like the dim lighting that wrapped around them. “You’re too tense in all those clothes. Then kneel and wait. I’ll be right back.” Gideon was gone almost before he finished speaking, but 8

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Jesse was accustomed to the vampire’s speed. He moved methodically, first unbuttoning his shirt, then kicking off his shoes. His belt and pants followed. He used the time to try to focus his thoughts with a breathing technique Michelle had taught him—she was the only one he’d told about the attacks. He fell into the easy rhythms without trouble, but only because the room was warm, and he knew Gideon would be back soon. Once undressed, he knelt on the floor at the foot of the bed, his hands going behind his back. The position he’d chosen gave him the best view of the doorway and of Gideon filling the frame when he returned. He’d taken off his shirt, but in his hand were some of Emma’s candles from the bathroom, votives he placed on the nightstand and promptly lit. Normally, Gideon complained about the heavy scents imbued in the wax, which was why Emma kept her use restricted to the leisurely baths she occasionally took. But as the flame began to flicker and dance, Jesse realized these were a new scent. Something musky he didn’t recognize. “These were supposed to be for Emma’s birthday,” Gideon said as he walked around the bed to light a matching pair on the other nightstand. “To replace that shit she keeps torturing me with. But I’ll get her something else, I think. I want these for tonight.” Jesse didn’t know what was in the candles or where Gideon bought them, but he found them very relaxing, like they were releasing something in the air besides their mellow aroma. Gideon’s skin looked almost golden in the light, and 9

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Jesse wanted to touch the expanse of his back and test the texture of his skin. “They’re very nice. I like them.” Gideon didn’t come back down the length of the bed, choosing instead to sit on the edge near its head. Catching Jesse’s eye, he beckoned him forward with two fingers, then gestured toward the floor in front of him. “Come here, boy.” The familiar command settled around him like a well-worn blanket, and he found himself crawling toward Gideon without a thought. Once he was in front of Gideon, he inhaled, and was able to detect a trace of the other man beneath the scent of the candles. When he was at the spot Gideon pointed at, he straightened to his knees. “Lay your head down.” The candles kept Gideon’s face half in shadows, but the half that wasn’t was calm and inviting. This wasn’t a harsh command meant for punishment. This was a quiet directive, sure and simple. Gideon’s voice held the respite Jesse hadn’t realized he needed, permission to let go without fears. He got that so little anymore. Jesse bent so his cheek could rest comfortably on Gideon’s thigh. Once again, he wanted to spill everything to Gideon. I’ve been trying, I swear. But nothing seems right. But the way Gideon touched him—his fingers light on his cheek and jaw and in his hair—made Jesse think talking would be redundant. Clearly, Gideon knew enough to know that Jesse needed this comfort of being close to him. So maybe that would be enough for now. 10

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“It’s a shame about the snow.” The low tones of Gideon’s voice were hypnotic, made more so by the dim lighting. Though he hadn’t been given instructions to do so, Jesse closed his eyes, concentrating on the feel of the hard muscle beneath his cheek, borrowing its strength as he focused on what Gideon was saying. “I kind of hoped we might get out to Osaka Garden when we were done. It’s been too long since we’ve been there.” Jesse nodded in agreement. He had a clear image of Gideon standing on the Moon Bridge, the water reflected on his face, the moon in his eyes, as he stared out over the tranquil pool. Jesse had taken Emma there, and she had glowed in the sun. The two images weren’t separate. They were overlaid in his memory, like a double exposure of a photograph. The Osaka Garden was always a favorite of his, but in the past six months, all of those memories took on a new dimension of gratitude—gratitude he had been there, that he could go back, that these two people were in his life, that he was in theirs. “Maybe we can go tomorrow,” Jesse whispered. “If the snow stops, we’ll make a date of it. You, me, and Emma.” Jesse nodded. In that room, in the dim light, with Gideon so close, it seemed impossible to think anything bad could happen to him—or could have ever happened to him. It was easy to agree to go out without hesitation, like everything had drifted back to normal. He discarded the excuses he might have reached for. Now wasn’t the time for excuses. Now he 11

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just wanted to believe the feeling of warmth and safety would follow him into the next day. Gideon’s fingers drifted downward, over his neck and the hair that was too long again, stroking along muscles twisted and torn from more than exertion. They touched that point between Jesse’s shoulder blades, that small valley between bone and sinew that seemed to be Gideon’s new favorite spot to caress. Jesse sighed as the small circles Gideon rubbed into his skin smoothed over the knot he didn’t want to admit owning. “Tell me what you want, boy.” Jesse didn’t respond for a long time. He couldn’t. Too many words clawed at his throat. But not answering wasn’t an option, either. Gideon’s tone made that clear, and it wouldn’t occur to Jesse to ignore a command, no matter how gently issued. “I want to stay here with you,” he began haltingly. “I want to be able to fix everything. I want to not be…scared. I want to forget.” “You’ll always be with me.” A second hand joined the first, this one massaging biceps that had no reason to ache but did. “Always. That is the one thing I can promise you, boy. With complete and utter faith. Because I will do whatever it takes to make that happen.” “I know,” Jesse murmured. And he did. The foundation of his faith in Gideon had never been tested. He just wished he could be the person he used to be. All of the personal insecurities were boiling to the surface now. Jesse didn’t have 12

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the strength to push it all back. “I don’t want to disappoint you.” “Because you’re scared?” Gideon grasped Jesse’s chin and lifted his head, forcing Jess to gaze up at him in the murky light. “After everything you’ve gone through, everything we’ve gone through together, I’d be more worried if you weren’t scared. And, frankly, I don’t think it’s possible for me to be more worried about you than I am right now.” Jesse thought of all the lengths he went to cover his mistakes and confusion, all the smiles he forced himself to wear so they wouldn’t worry, all the times he insisted he was just fine. And realized that living with a vampire and an empath, he’d probably never really had a chance. “I’m going to be fine.” The words were automatic and he was sorry he said them. Gideon’s jaw hardened. “I hate that fucking word. Because you’re not. You’re not eating, and you’re not sleeping, and there’s absolutely nothing fine”—the way he sneered it, the word might as well have been a cutting slur—“about how you hold back from us. Emma, I almost understand. You’ve always tried to protect her from anything you thought would hurt her. Ever since the beginning.” The grip on his chin pinched, almost painful now. “But this is me. And I can take it. But you’re not letting me.” Jesse didn’t try to look away, but he was at a loss. He didn’t know how to explain himself, and he didn’t think Gideon wanted an apology. So that left the plain, tired truth. “I know. But I don’t know what to do. I don’t. How am I 13

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supposed to sleep when I have nothing but nightmares? And sometimes…the flashbacks aren’t even the worst part. Sometimes…I keep losing time. It’s just gone. Minutes or hours. And I’m trying…” The fingers on his chin loosened, some of the flint in Gideon’s eyes softening at the same time. “I know you’re trying. But maybe it’s time to admit you need more than I can give you.” Jesse frowned. “What do you mean?” “I mean…” Letting him go, Gideon stood and edged around Jesse, pacing the length of the bed behind him. “I know we tried therapy when we got back from New York, and I know the meds you got weren’t good. But there are others out there, others you haven’t tried. Something has to work.” “You want me to go back to therapy?” Jesse hadn’t liked the experience the first time around. Of course, it had been utterly impossible for him to actually talk to the psychiatrist about what happened to him. He didn’t have the ability to articulate his feelings, or the patience to learn how. Gideon stopped at the far end of the bed and stuffed his hands into his pockets. “Yeah, I do. Something intensive. Because we’ve let it go for so long.” He paused. “I found an inpatient program that I think is exactly what you need, actually.” Jesse went cold, his fingers numb. “Gideon, please don’t make me leave.” “You wouldn’t be leaving. I talked to the doctors. They do the psych eval straight off, get you on the meds as soon as 14

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possible. Lots of group and individual sessions to talk about everything. You’d probably be in the hospital for two weeks tops. Just so that you can start getting a grip on the physical symptoms. Then you can come home.” Jesse shook his head as Gideon spoke, and at the mention of two weeks, his heart seemed to slip. “Please, Gideon. I don’t want to leave. I can’t…not for two weeks. Not for so long. I can’t be alone for that long.” “You can have visitors. Emma will come every day. And I’ll call.” “You’ll call?” Jesse stood up now, unmindful of the fact he didn’t have permission. “Gideon…I can’t…the only time anything makes any sense is when we’re together. When Emma touches me and talks to me like everything is normal. And I need you. And you want me to go away for two weeks?” “And I need you to not hurt anymore.” Gideon advanced, but the strides were determined, not shaded in the anger that had started this shift in their conversation. “Do you think this is easy for me? It’s not. But it’s a hell of a lot easier than knowing nothing I’m doing is working. You’re not any better now than you were six months ago. I have to do something.” “Something. Yes. Fine. We’ll do something.” He put his hand on Gideon’s arm, hoping the contact would help somehow. “But I can’t go there. I can’t be alone like that. And how would the group sessions work? How could I possibly explain what happened to me? I can’t…” He gestured at his stomach, the skin twisted with scar tissue. “How can I explain 15

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this?” Gideon only glanced at the reminders left from Marcus’s torture. That hurt almost as much as the thought of having to leave. “I wouldn’t have picked a hospital that you wouldn’t be able to speak freely,” he said, his tone gentler. He cupped Jesse’s face, holding him still as his warm eyes searched his. “I can’t watch you bleed like this anymore. I know this is all my fault. Just let me fix it. That’s all I’m asking.” “It’s not your fault.” Jesse knew Gideon would blame himself for what happened, for the monster Marcus became, and the things he was driven to do. He knew Gideon’s guilt weighed on him—a burden he shouldn’t be forced to carry. Part of Jesse’s reticence to talk stemmed from that knowledge. Gideon wanted to put the past behind him where it couldn’t hurt them anymore, and Jesse wished he could help with that project. “Can I just have some time to think about this?” Gideon regarded him for moments on end, unblinking, inscrutable. His broad thumb brushed over Jesse’s mouth, and though Jess had the urge to chase it after the soft caresses stopped, he remained still. “Of course, you can,” he finally said. “You’ll probably want to review the hospital’s course of treatment. Make sure this is the best fit.” Jesse nodded. “Thank you.” He moved closer, resting his brow against Gideon’s neck. His heart began beating normally again, and the ice around his limbs began to melt away. How could Gideon really expect him to leave? Jesse was his. 16

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There was a breath of hesitation, and then Gideon’s strong arms folded around his back, pulling him flush against his chest. These were the moments when he could best believe everything was going to be okay. Gideon was the rock upon which Jesse had structured half of his life. “I love you, boy,” Gideon murmured. “Don’t forget that. Ever.” “I love you, too.” Jesse clung to him, completely unwilling to put even an inch of space between them. He needed the solid reminder of Gideon’s body. He waited for the kisses, the touches that always came when Gideon held him like this. When so little else made sense, those always did. But the caress that followed was not what he expected, a brush across his ear as Gideon said, “I need to hold you, but you’ve had a long day. Let’s lay down.” Jesse nodded and stepped back, but Gideon kept hold of him. They settled on the bed, Jesse’s head resting on Gideon’s shoulder, his face in his neck once again. Gideon seemed content to simply rub his back, and brush his lips across Jesse’s brow on occasion—which wasn’t exactly what Jesse’d had in mind when they came downstairs, but it was still good. Still, he resisted sleep for as long as he could, scared of what he would see when he closed his eyes. But Gideon’s soft caresses and his own exhaustion eventually overwhelmed his fear, and he drifted into an easy, if not deep, sleep.

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CHAPTER 2 Emma shook the snow from her hair and stamped her feet, knocking more snow off her boots and encouraging blood to return to her toes. She was ready for this winter to be over. She had never been more willing to put an entire season behind her. A part of her believed things would be better— things had to be better—in the spring. “Is Jesse up here?” Michelle asked as she let herself into the door behind Emma. All the lights in the office were still on, and Jesse’s desk still covered in books. Once that would have been a sign that though he was absent, he intended to come back. Jesse was careful with his books. But now it could mean anything. 18

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“No…I…” Emma faltered a bit, her skin prickling as a wave of what could only be called pure anger washed over her. At the same time, she heard the unmistakable sound of a fist connecting with something solid. “Michelle…why don’t you just…make yourself comfortable? I’m going to see what’s going on.” Michelle touched her arm. “Are you sure you want to go in there? Maybe you should just let him work it out.” Emma was sure. She wasn’t scared of Gideon, even when he was obviously angry. And she was pretty sure she knew the source of his anger—this wasn’t the first time his frustration had erupted in violence. But if Gideon was acting out this way, Jesse must be in bed. Which meant they would all get a small respite and maybe Jesse would make it through the night without waking. “I need to go check on him.” Michelle’s lips pulled into a thin line, and Emma knew she wasn’t pleased with her answer, but ultimately, it wasn’t any of Michelle’s business. She stepped away from the older woman, and snow trailed behind her as she crossed the office and followed the sound to the playroom. She opened the door just as his fist slammed against a wooden post he once used when he was teaching Jesse how to fight. It snapped in two. He wore only his pants, his upper body and feet bare. Blood ran down his knuckles from the force of his blows, but Gideon was oblivious to the mess he was making as it dripped onto the floor, splattered against the wall. The anger she’d sensed in the main office was a wall of heat in here, pulsing 19

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with as much power as the slams of his fists. Though she had spent the last nine months getting accustomed to being open around her two lovers, when the emotions were this strong, it still managed to smash into her gut and leave her shaking when she wasn’t fully prepared for it. Her hand shot out to grip the doorjamb, using the solidity to keep from swaying. Her nails scraped across the wood, and Gideon paused in mid-swing, glancing in her direction. As soon as their dark eyes connected, his arm dropped. Everything in him seemed to sag, actually. That was harder than witnessing the violence. “I told him.” They had been discussing the inpatient treatment for over a week, trying to decide when and how they should broach it with Jesse, debating whether it would even work, fighting over if they should do it at all. She knew Gideon had pinned a lot of hope to the option because, in his view, the alternative plan was simply not acceptable. “I guess he didn’t take it well?” Gideon started to lift a hand to run it over his hair, his most common nervous gesture, and noticed the blood, seemingly for the first time. “He begged me not to make him go. Not to make him be alone.” He sucked at his knuckle, the sound hollow within the room, but after only seconds, he seemed to choke on the blood, snorting as he dropped his hand again. “Can we even blame him?” he demanded. “He spent how many days with Brooker? How many days alone, when I couldn’t help him, I couldn’t even find him. Of course, he 20

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doesn’t want to go.” Emma would have predicted exactly that reaction, and she suspected Gideon would have, too, if he had been honest with himself. In the past six months, Jesse had somehow become more closed off, and at the same time, hyperaware of them. Emma didn’t miss the way Jesse’s eyes tracked either of them when they were in a room. He was always watching. She closed the distance and gently touched Gideon’s shoulder, trying to push aside the force of his anger and replace it with something a little gentler. “Michelle is out in the office. If Jesse is asleep, maybe now is a good time to talk about her idea.” He stiffened at her touch. Didn’t move. Watched her with the eyes of a predator who found himself cornered. “I bet she’s loving this. Getting to say I told you so.” “Gideon, she’s not here because she wants to attack you. She’s here because she cares about Jesse, too. And he trusts her. There are only three people in the world he does trust right now. We need to work together.” Emma knew Gideon didn’t believe that. Every day Jesse didn’t get stronger was a day Gideon blamed himself even more for not putting a stop to it in the first place. He thought it was his place to protect Jesse, to protect both of them. The fact that on one occasion, control had slipped away from him in such a shattering way was slowly eating him alive. “Go put some coffee on for Michelle.” He rubbed at his torn knuckles. “I need to get cleaned up before she sees me. No point in giving her even more ammunition.” 21

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Emma hesitated for a beat before nodding. She didn’t want to leave him, but the sooner he got himself cleaned up, the sooner they could get through this. Michelle was still standing right where Emma had left her, her face marred with a frown. “What’s going on?” “Gideon told Jesse about the treatment program.” “And Jesse doesn’t want to go,” Michelle said flatly. “I told you he wouldn’t. Nothing is going to get him to that hospital short of force, and you can’t force somebody to get better.” Emma sighed. “I know. But maybe you could not mention that to Gideon? He’s upset enough right now.” Michelle waved her hand dismissively. “I’m not worried about Gideon’s feelings. I’m worried about Jesse. I wish I could just take him out of here.” Emma’s lips pulled into a tight line. “Well, you can’t, so don’t mention that particular wish either.” She gestured at the couch. “You might as well get comfortable. I’m going to put some coffee on.” The pot was nearly full by the time she heard the playroom door open and close. When Gideon appeared, he was dressed again, his immaculate shirt tucked into his waistband, expensive loafers back on his feet. His hands were clean as well, though the knuckles were still raw and red from where he’d been pounding at the post. His mouth thinned as he locked eyes with Michelle, and he stopped just inside the room and folded his arms over his chest. “For the record,” he said, and his voice was cold and 22

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flat, “I don’t give a fuck about your feelings either. This is about Jesse and how we’re going to make this better for him, once and for all.” Most people would be afraid of Gideon when he looked and sounded like that—and reasonably so, in Emma’s opinion. But the emotions she could pick up from Michelle never spiked into anything remotely resembling fear. “Well, it’s good that you want to try to help Jesse,” Michelle said in a tone that bordered on dismissive. “We should have been talking this over much sooner.” “You’re not Jesse’s keeper.” “Maybe not. But who has he been talking to for the past several months? It hasn’t been…” Before Michelle could finish her sentence, Emma thrust a hot cup of coffee into her hands. “Please. If Jesse wakes up, the last thing he needs is to hear the two of you fighting. Especially over him.” In spite of her empathic abilities, reading Gideon was spotty at the best of times. Vampires were different from people, and without physical contact, she could only catch flashes of the most intense emotions. Facing his anger in the playroom had been daunting, more for the fact that she rarely was hit with his feelings so bluntly, but now that he looked back in control—albeit angry—she got next to nothing. It was both a relief and a worry, because it meant she had to rely upon visual cues and personal knowledge to keep these two from going at it. While Michelle sipped at her coffee, Gideon didn’t move. 23

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“What Jesse needs—what he wants—is to not be scared anymore. To forget. Explain to me how putting him in Brooker’s path again is going to make that happen.” “Jesse is too kind-hearted for his own good. You do realize he doesn’t hate Brooker, right? He thinks Brooker was a victim, too. He’s got a lot of anger and a lot of confusion, and he has nowhere to direct it, so he’s directing it back to himself. He won’t entertain the idea that the situation is your fault,” she looked directly at Gideon, “for a second. He knows Brooker was insane, but he’s convinced it didn’t have to be that way. And no, he didn’t tell me any of this. But it’s there, if you listen to the way he talks.” “But won’t it make it worse if we send him to Brooker and confirm that Brooker was once a normal, non-werebear person?” Emma asked. “Jesse wants to save everybody. I think he would like the chance to save Brooker from himself, even if it doesn’t change anything that happened in this dimension.” Gideon scowled. “Jesse saves people all the time. It can’t be that simple.” “But he couldn’t do anything to help Brooker, could he? Or you.” “What do you mean, or me? I’m fine.” Michelle snorted. “No, you’re not. The demons that haunt you are nothing less than what you deserve, but you can’t tell Jesse that. Believe me, I’ve tried. The only way you can save Brooker is by saving Mary. Jesse knows that she’s the focal point between you and him and Brooker.” 24

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Mention of Mary made Gideon flinch, but he hid it by striding over to the coffee pot, turning his back to them while he poured himself a cup. Mary Straughn was the woman who had changed Gideon’s life over forty years earlier, a beautiful black civil rights activist who had convinced him to focus his power elsewhere, if only for a little while. Her murder, a death Gideon blamed himself for, had changed the spiral of his existence, and he focused all his efforts after that in saving the city she’d loved. But Gideon had not been the only one to love Mary. Marcus Brooker had been the assistant pastor at her church, a follower who’d witnessed her savage death firsthand. He had sold his soul after that, but it was a chance encounter in New York City the previous fall that had spun their lives anew. Jesse had been unable to resist the history Marcus had lived. And Jesse had paid the price for his curiosity. A price they all bore, even six months after the fact. “Messing with this kind of magic is dangerous,” he said. “I don’t like it.” “Funny. You were perfectly willing to mess with that kind of magic one hundred years ago. Don’t tell me you actually learn from your mistakes.” The cup shattered in Gideon’s hand, scalding coffee spilling over his fingers. Emma darted forward at his muttered curse, but when she grabbed a towel to try and help him wipe it away, Gideon retreated beyond her reach. “Don’t go there, Michelle,” he warned. “I’ll lock him in that hospital myself if you keep this up.” 25

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It was on the tip of Emma’s tongue to beg them not to fight a third time, but Michelle merely nodded. Emma didn’t know why the other woman was willing to back down, and she didn’t care, as long as they remained civil. “We’ve been doing a lot of research,” Emma provided. “And Michelle knows what she’s doing. The magic is surprisingly straightforward.” “She’s right. I’ve even been able to find a dimension that is nearly identical to this one. I can use my counterpart in that dimension as a sort of homing signal. You’ll be sent directly to her, and then she will be able to send you home.” “You don’t like me in this world. What the hell makes you think another you is going to like me any more to help us?” “I’ll see to that. The best time to do this is going to be in three nights. Which means you need to explain the plan to Jesse and see if he’ll agree soon. I need enough time to set everything up.” “What if he doesn’t agree to it?” Emma asked. “We have to make him agree to it.” The eyes Gideon turned to her were bleak. “I can’t watch him like this anymore, Em. I can’t.” “I know.” Sometimes when she was with Jesse, he was almost his old self. Almost. She would see a glimmer of the easy smile he used to share with the world, hear a hint of the laughter, sense a bit of the quiet self-assurance that would allow him to submit to Gideon, or to her, completely. But then it would be gone, and he’d become withdrawn again. She thought a comparison to a ghost was apt—she thought what he 26

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did resembled haunting. “I can’t either.” Michelle stood up. “Do what you have to do. I’ll come over and talk to him if I need to.” She looked at Gideon with an expression that might have been sympathetic. “I know this isn’t going to be easy, but I wouldn’t do anything to hurt Jesse. He’s one of the few good people I’ve ever known.” Emma believed her, but there was no mistaking the doubt that warred on Gideon’s handsome features. He didn’t argue, though, simply nodding before turning his back and disappearing into his office. Michelle gave Emma one last small smile of support and followed his example, the main door closing quietly behind her. Gideon stood in front of his desk, palms flat on the surface as he leaned heavily against it. His head was bowed, his shoulders curved, and though his face was hidden from her view, she knew the grief that would be reflected there. “The only part about this that I like is that at least Jesse won’t be alone.” He said it without lifting his head, without looking back at her. “But it means you’re going to be. He’s going to use that as a weapon not to do it, and I can’t say that he’ll be wrong.” “I won’t be completely alone. I’m going to stay with Michelle while you’re gone. And besides, I’ve been alone before.” She moved closer to him. “I can handle it as long as I know you’re both coming back.” The slight shift in his shoulders was probably meant to be a reluctant agreement, but otherwise, Gideon remained where he was. “Can we not do it tonight? I don’t think…I’m not up 27

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to it.” “If he’s asleep, we shouldn’t bother him. Come on. Let’s go downstairs. If he does wake up, we should be there in case he needs us.” “You go. I need a few minutes.” Emma nodded. She understood. The situation was difficult for her; it must have been nearly impossible for Gideon. She was sure the same sort of questions and doubts plagued him. It did seem like an impossibly huge risk for a result that was far from guaranteed. Maybe it would help Jesse psychologically if they had a sort of do-over. But what Michelle suggested did not actually change anything. It couldn’t take anything back. It couldn’t make the days of captivity disappear, like it never happened. But at that point, Emma honestly believed it was worth it to try. She didn’t know what else they could do. The initial evaluation and medication Jesse had tried only upset him. He didn’t like talking to strangers. He didn’t like the way the drugs made him feel. There had been a noticeable spike in his anxiety. Ignoring it didn’t make the problem go away. And she could give him all the love in the world, but love wasn’t a magic elixir. It couldn’t cure these sorts of problems. And Michelle was right about how Jesse viewed the world. He saw the entire situation as nothing but a series of victims. Mary had been a victim. Marcus had been a victim. Marcus had made him a victim. Even Gideon was a victim. Maybe it would help if Jesse knew things could be different. Things could be better. People could still be saved, somehow. 28

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Jesse was curled on his side in the middle of the big bed when Emma reached the bedroom. She changed quickly and quietly, careful not to disturb him as she slipped between the sheets. Without opening his eyes, he moved closer, wrapped his arm around her, then settled again. Emma concentrated on sending every soothing, comforting feeling she could find. Sometimes, that was enough to get him through the night without waking.

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CHAPTER 3 When Emma casually informed him she had requested the day off, Jesse knew something was going on. His first thought was of the hospital. They were going to make him go. They were going to take him together. They weren’t going to give him a choice, and he couldn’t resist both of them. Not if they really wanted to send him away. But Emma made toast and coffee and didn’t mention the hospital at all. She did, however, frown when Jesse pulled on a T-shirt that had once fit well, but was now too big. He wasn’t sure if she disapproved because the shirt hung off his frame, or if it was because he insisted on covering himself. He never had a problem wandering around the apartment in various states of 30

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undress before, but now he was acutely self-conscious. The deep cuts on his abdomen had healed with a combination of medical supervision and magical ointments, but now his stomach was crossed and crisscrossed with ugly looking scars. That was the worst of it, and Jesse couldn’t even stand to look at it himself. He didn’t like subjecting Emma and Gideon to it. There were scars on his back, too, that he couldn’t see, and on his forearms. Scars from whips, scars from knives, some of them small and fading, some of them raised and still an angry shade of red. All of them a pointed reminder. Most days, Jesse didn’t just feel self-conscious about the state of his body. He felt grotesque. But Gideon and Emma never looked at him with a hint of disgust or horror, like they were pretending they didn’t see his disfigurement. Emma kept the conversation light and casual as she encouraged him to eat his toast. Which he did, because it made her happy. But when Gideon joined them in the kitchen, silently sitting in his chair at the table, Jesse knew for sure something was going on. Especially when Jesse realized that Gideon wasn’t just waking up—he hadn’t been to bed at all. Jesse concentrated on spreading marmalade over his toast. If they were going to try to send him to the hospital, he wasn’t going to give them the opening they needed to start the conversation. “So…Michelle stopped in last night,” Emma said with a smile. “She was sorry she missed you.” Jesse dropped his toast on his plate. “Why would Michelle 31

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come here? Michelle never comes here.” “She wanted to know about the hospital.” This came from Gideon. “I told her you didn’t want to go.” Emma reached out a hand to caress Jesse’s arm. “And that’s okay that you don’t want to. We know it’s hard to think about. That’s why we’ve been working so hard, trying to come up with something that’ll help.” Jesse looked down, sorry he couldn’t just tell them that he would go. But the thought of it still filled his veins with ice water. “I said I would think about it. I wish I knew something else that would help.” “There is something else.” Emma’s fingers glided across his skin, but he barely felt it. “Michelle and I have been talking. A lot. And reading up on post-traumatic stress disorder. And we both agreed you need to feel like you’re in control again. So Marcus doesn’t have that power over you anymore. Michelle suggested if you had the chance to save Marcus from turning into the monster he did, that might help.” “It might,” Jesse said slowly. “But…I don’t really see what good that does anybody. Time travel isn’t possible, the last time I checked.” “No, but apparently, dimension hopping is the sport of champions,” Gideon said dryly. “Dimension hopping?” Jesse knew what Gideon meant, but it still didn’t make sense. What did dimension hopping have to do with them? “You go to the point in another dimension before Brooker sold his soul,” Emma provided. “Before Mary died.” 32

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Jesse’s eyes widened at the mention of Mary’s name, and the denial sprang to his lips immediately. “No.” Gideon’s eyes were steady. “Don’t say no because you think you’re protecting me from seeing her again. I wouldn’t have agreed to try this if I couldn’t handle it.” Jesse shook his head. That wasn’t his concern, but it didn’t surprise him that Gideon didn’t make the obvious assumption. Jesse was not a jealous person, by nature. More than that though, he had never doubted Gideon or his place in Gideon’s world. “It’s not…it’s not that. It’s…” He looked to Emma helplessly. She would understand. She would have understood even if she wasn’t picking up on his feelings. “He’s afraid,” she said softly. “Of what?” Gideon leaned forward. “I’m going with you, Jess. You’re not doing this alone. Nobody’s going to hurt you. I won’t let them.” “Yeah, I figured you probably were going with me.” Jesse fiddled with the plate in front of him. “But you’re going with me to save the woman you love…loved…from death, and that sort of second chance never happens, does it?” He couldn’t bring himself to look up at Gideon, but when the silence stretched between them, he had no choice but to glance up through his lashes. Gideon was watching him, his features completely inscrutable, but it was the way his hands clenched together in front of him that gave away his tension. “It’s not a second chance for what you’re thinking,” he said. “I’m with you. And Emma. And this is not going to be 33

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my Mary we’re going to see. I know that.” Emma touched the back of Jesse’s hand. “Michelle and I thought it would be best for both of you this way. If both of you confront what you think is out of your control, maybe you’ll both stop being so haunted by it. Or at least, learn how to let it go and realize it’s not your fault. You did what you could.” The logic made sense to him, or about as much sense as anything made to him these days. But there were still a whole host of issues to make his stomach churn. Mary might not be Gideon’s Mary, but she also wouldn’t be disturbed, and disfigured, and a shadow of who she used to be. And most of all, she wouldn’t drive Gideon to distraction with frustration and fear. Emma’s fingers curling around his hand told him that she could still feel his doubts. “I understand why you think that would work. But…how would we even do it? Even John isn’t powerful enough for that sort of hopping.” “No,” Emma agreed. “But Michelle is. Dimensions are kind of her specialty.” “Has Michelle ever told you about what she is?” Gideon asked. Jesse shook his head. He strongly suspected she wasn’t quite human for a number of reasons. She occasionally made off-hand references to events she could not have witnessed, judging by the age she claimed. There were a few books in her shop with signed inscriptions and dedications to her that dated back over a century. In many ways, she reminded Jesse of 34

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Gideon—though he would never, ever say so out loud. They both had a sort of tired, all-knowing look in their eyes. Like nothing they saw could surprise them. “Michelle’s never mentioned it to me. Though given the size of her book collection, I’d guess that whatever she is, she’s been around for awhile.” “Try more like forever.” Gideon looked less than pleased with his clarification. “She’s a historian. Kind of. A keeper. Basically, she sticks around to make sure nobody fucks with shit they shouldn’t. Like dimensions.” “But because she’s as concerned about you as we are,” Emma interjected, “she suggested we do this. She guarantees she can get us where we want to go.” Jesse glanced down, pretending to be fascinated by the brown pattern of his toast. They were basically telling him that they were willing to bend the rules of reality, cross boundaries people should not cross, and possibly risk their lives in the process, on the off-chance that it would help Jesse come to terms with himself. And he was willing to tell them no thank you. Over a girl. But it wasn’t just a girl. Because he was pretty sure losing Gideon would hurt him in ways that Marcus Brooker couldn’t even touch. And if there was one thing Jesse now believed more than ever, it was that you didn’t go looking for trouble. “What are you going to do?” he asked Emma. “You wouldn’t be dimension hopping with us, would you?” She shook her head. “Michelle needs me here. To help. But you’ll have Gideon, and it will only be for a few days.” 35

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“Michelle wants the glass slipper back before we steal it,” Gideon commented. Rising, he crossed to the refrigerator and took a blood bag out of the freezer. “We’ll have five days to try and set things right. Then we come home. For good.” Jesse tried to think of a single good reason they couldn’t leave Emma alone with Michelle, but nothing came to mind. He could flatly refuse to go, but after the scene over the hospital treatment, he didn’t want them to think he didn’t want to get well. Because he did. He just wanted to find a way that didn’t include being separated from Gideon or putting Gideon in the path of the woman he’d never quite gotten over. “Can I talk to Emma for a few minutes?” Nothing changed in Gideon’s face, but he set the cup down just hard enough for it to ring loudly against the counter. “Of course,” he said. “I’ll just…” He stopped, clearly at a loss, before shaking his head and heading for the doorway. “I’ll be in the office when you want me.” Emma waited until they heard Gideon’s footsteps disappear up the stairs. “This is as hard for him as it is for you, you know? He hates this plan.” “Which part does he hate? All of it?” “The part where Michelle is the one in control and not him. The part where he has to see Mary again. The part where he thinks you’ll hate him if you see what he was like back then. The part where he has to see the look on your face when you see Marcus again. So yeah. All of it.” But he was willing to do it because Jesse didn’t want to be committed to a hospital. He folded his arms on the table and 36

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put his head down, staring at the floor between his feet. “I hate feeling like this, Emma.” “I know. I know.” Her chair scraped across the floor, and he saw her legs move around the corner of the table. Her small hands touched his shoulder, guiding him back up so that there was room for her to position herself on his lap. Her brown eyes glowed when he met them, even more so than her flawless skin. She had cut her long blonde hair so that it hung just below her shoulders, and though he missed the way it used to fall down her back, the new angles heightened her beauty even more. Emma was the most extraordinary looking woman he had ever known, and as she caressed his face, leaning in to brush her mouth over and over along his skin, Jesse wondered yet again how he’d gotten so lucky to have her. “We want to make this better for you,” she breathed. “You have to trust us.” “I do trust you. I just feel so out of control all the time. Marcus…showed me a picture of Gideon and Mary. He looked so content with her…and I’m a mess. I don’t know where either one of you find the patience to put up with all of this.” “You’re not a mess. You’re in pain. There’s a difference.” “Emma…” He cupped the back of her neck, his fingers caressing her gently. “If you tell me that I have nothing to worry about, I’ll believe you.” “You don’t have anything to worry about,” she whispered. She rested her forehead on his, her marmalade-sweetened 37

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breath fanning across his cheeks. “I know you’re scared what’ll happen if Gideon sees Mary, because you saw some photo of them. But you know what? I’ve spent months watching you and Gideon. I see every day how much he loves you. And nobody can take that away. If you don’t believe anything else, believe that.” Jesse nodded. He knew she was right. Down to his bones, he knew it. And he hated that anything could make him doubt Gideon, even if it was just for a few minutes. “I think I upset him.” Emma chuckled. “That’s not upset. You should have seen him with Michelle last night.” “I can imagine. I should probably go up and talk to him.” Sitting back, she skimmed her fingertips over his mouth one last time before sliding off his lap again. “We’ll both go talk to him,” she said, tugging him to his feet. Their hands remained entwined as they left their breakfast behind, taking the stairs slowly as they ascended to the office. Jesse half-expected Gideon to be in the playroom or sprawled on the couch listening for them. Instead, he was sitting at his desk, doodling on a notepad as he spoke to somebody on the phone. “Yeah, the ones I showed you,” he said. He caught their eye and waved them in. “They’re actually here now. Let me call you back, and I’ll let you know what time.” Jesse sat in his usual chair besides Gideon’s desk and absently pulled Emma into his lap. “What’s going on?” Gideon played with his pen, rolling it between his fingers 38

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as he leaned back in his seat and faced them. “I want to do something for you two. Something I’ve been thinking about for, well, a while. Something to prove to you what you two mean to me, and better, that everybody else knows it, too.” “Gideon, I know, I was just…” Emma put her hand on his shoulder, gently cutting him off. “What have you got in mind?” “Tattoos. One for each of you. I’ve already picked out the designs, but you can get it wherever you want.” The corner of his mouth lifted a small fraction. “Though obviously I’d prefer it if you got it somewhere I could show the world you belong to me.” Jesse blinked. “Tattoos?” The more he thought about the idea, the more he warmed to it. “Why did you wait until now to mention it?” His shoulder lifted in a half-shrug. “It was always one of those, wouldn’t-it-be nice ideas. Something I could save for Christmas or birthdays. Something important. But right now, I can’t think of anything more important than proving to you beyond a shadow of a doubt that you’re mine.” He paused. “Or that I’m yours.” Jesse might have protested. I know I’m yours. I know. I’m just confused right now. But he didn’t want to protest. He wanted the visual, permanent proof. He needed it. It would be something solid to hold on to, even when everything else seemed to be in chaos and flux. Jesse squeezed the hand he was still holding and pulled his attention from Gideon to Emma. “What do you think?” 39

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“I like it.” Heat radiated from where they connected, but it wasn’t simply the warmth of her body that reached into him. It was the force of everything she felt, her love, her desire, her excitement about being marked as Gideon’s. Her smile turned impish. “Have I ever mentioned how hot I think tattoos are?” Jesse smiled what felt like his first genuine smile in weeks, maybe even longer. “No, because if you had, I would already have one.” “So can I call Rae back, and tell her to come over today?” Gideon asked. “It’ll just be the outlines for now. The color will have to get added later.” It seemed a little counter-intuitive to be worrying about tattoos now. Didn’t they have to discuss how they would travel between dimensions? And what they would do once they got there? Did Gideon even know who had initially been responsible for Mary’s death? And how long were they going to stay? And what if they were ultimately fucking around with something they had no right to fuck around with? But Emma’s excitement was flowing through his veins, and Gideon was looking at Jesse like he expected one, and only one, answer from him. “Yes, call her.”

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CHAPTER 4 Rae Cashell was an artist. She might not work in a medium that led to exhibits in museums, but Gideon had seen her magic emblazoned on enough bodies to recognize genius when he saw it. There wasn’t another tattooist in Chicago with her kind of vision. When it came time to consider who would mark the two most precious things in his life, Rae was the only person he trusted to do it. After ten minutes of arguing with her, he’d set her up in the playroom. Though she brought her own lights, Rae complained that the apartment didn’t give her the space to work without feeling Gideon hovering. “It’s bad enough you expect me to do this with an 41

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audience.” Her green eyes flashed as she adjusted the height on one of the floods. “But say one word, Gideon, and I’m kicking you out. No arguments.” He’d given her a mock salute and hung back after that. He respected Rae too much to give her a hard time. She did Emma first. The design Gideon had chosen was a lavender lotus flower on fire, set in black whorls. After seeing it, Emma asked Rae if the whorls could be made into letters instead, her smile shy as she asked for a G on one side and a J on the other. Jesse stood next to Gideon at the wall as they watched Rae work, etching in the outline at the small of Emma’s back. Jesse never said a word. His vivid gaze stayed fixed on Emma, stretched out on her stomach on Rae’s table. Gideon smelled the heat coming off him, and the perfume of desire that emanated from Jesse’s flesh was the rawest it had been since the Brooker incident. It had both of them hard. When Jesse’s turn came, he stripped out of his shirt and took the chair next to Emma’s table. His design was more intricate than hers, two dragons swirling around each other in a yin/yang pattern. When they were colored, one would be red, the other black, but it was the fact that Jesse chose to have it imprinted on his inner arm, below his elbow where anybody might see it, that made Gideon’s heart clench. He should have done this months ago. Maybe they wouldn’t have reached this point of no return, where their only option was to rely on Michelle’s dimension hopping. Maybe he would never have had to see the look on Jesse’s face when 42

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he suggested the hospital. Maybe a lot of things could be different. All Gideon knew was that he had been slowly watching Jesse fade away. That wasn’t acceptable. Jesse deserved far, far better than anything Gideon had ever given him, and if Gideon had to travel through a hundred dimensions finding an answer, he’d do it. At first, Gideon was mildly concerned about the reaction Jesse would have to the pain. True, it would be mild compared to what Gideon himself had done to Jesse in the past, but since New York, Gideon had avoided hurting Jesse in any way. Whipping was not an option, of course, but almost everything else they ever did together was also off the table. So Gideon was uncertain of how Jesse would react, and unprepared. As Rae began, Jesse kept his gaze fixed on his arm, like he didn’t want to miss a single second of the work. His shoulders were stiff, his brow furrowed. Gradually, he relaxed, and his attention drifted from the figures taking shape on his arm. He looked up, his gaze locking with Gideon’s, and for a moment, the strain and tension of the previous six months was simply gone, and Jesse looked like his old self. His pupils were blown, his lips parted slightly, the pulse hammering in his neck. And he smelled so good. There was no escaping the force of Jesse’s arousal in the small room. It was only amplified through Emma, until their combined excitement was almost a physical force around him. He had never seen Rae falter. She was a pro, just as her mother had been a pro. Gideon had watched Sencia work 43

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when she had first arrived from the Phillipines, and she had taught her daughter everything she knew. With her unusual beauty—the tawny skin and exotic bone structure from her mother, wide green eyes and auburn hair from her father—Rae could have done just about anything. But she had picked up Sencia’s tools and never looked back. In the thirty years Gideon had known her, Rae was unflappable. But not now. As the desire in the room swelled, beads of perspiration popped out on Rae’s brow. She had her hair pulled back and tucked up, keeping it out of her eyes and off her neck. She didn’t talk while she worked, didn’t smile. It wasn’t until sweat dripped into her eye that she straightened, grabbing a towel that sat nearby and wiping her forehead with it. When she glanced at Gideon, her eyes glittered, but she picked up her ink and resumed her work anyway. In the silence of the room, Gideon heard the three hearts thundering away, Emma’s quick breath. He kept expecting somebody to break it—to say something—because it wasn’t natural to be this silent. Somebody other than him, because he would no sooner speak than he would walk out. Ultimately, it was Rae who uttered the first word. And it was more of a sigh than anything. “Done.” It shattered the stasis that seemed to wrap around them. Emma reached for her shirt, while Gideon strode forward and started turning off the added lights. Jesse didn’t rise from his chair, but the way he kept making a fist, turning his arm this way and that, made Gideon smile. The tattoos had been 44

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excellent idea. Even if the air hadn’t been ripe with their lust, seeing the fascinated light in Jesse’s eye was more than worth it. “You can just…send me a check,” Rae said. She retreated for the doorway, her tongue constantly licking her lips. “And bring the lights by the shop tonight. I’m not going to have any more clients today anyway.” Gideon didn’t argue as she practically ran from the room. The sooner he had these two to himself, the happier they were all going to be. “Do I really have to put my shirt back on?” Emma said. “No. I’d just tear it getting it off you again.” He looked at Jesse, who was still sitting in his chair. “Do you like it?” The look in Jesse’s eyes made anything he could have said redundant. “It’s…I love it.” Gideon crouched in front of him, grasping him lightly by the wrist. Letting his fingertips graze over the tattoo, he only glanced up briefly at Jesse before bending forward and skimming his tongue over the hot skin. Jesse sharply sucked in his breath, and he stiffened. Gideon knew each of Jesse’s reactions, and he knew Jesse didn’t want him to stop, didn’t want Gideon to move away from him. He whispered Gideon’s name, his voice strained and full of longing. Gideon tightened his fingers until Jesse’s pulse hammered into him. “You and Emma are everything to me. But I think I need to make sure you don’t forget that.” Without looking away, he called Emma’s name, waiting until she’d risen from 45

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the table and come to his side before adding, “Go to the cupboard and bring me the gloves and the white rope.” Emma didn’t have to be told what gloves he wanted, and she didn’t have to be told twice. Jesse licked his lips as she crossed the room, his eyes darting from Gideon’s face to Emma, and then back again. “What are you going to do?” Jesse murmured. Gideon cocked a brow. “Well, telling just takes my fun out of it, doesn’t it, boy?” When Emma returned, he released Jesse and straightened. “We’re going to have to be careful about your back, Em,” he said, moving behind her. Taking the rope from her hands, he cupped one of her full breasts as he let the rope unfurl to the floor. “So I’ll just have to bind you high.” Her intake of breath was sharp, and she licked her juicy lips. “Whatever you want, Sir.” Though he didn’t let his pleasure show, inwardly, Gideon smiled. Emma always did pick up on her role swiftly. She was just as good as Jesse that way. “Watch, boy.” Doubling the rope up, Gideon began wrapping it around Emma’s body, beneath her breasts, going back and forth until it reached the thickness he wanted. He repeated the procedure along the top of her breasts, all the while keeping a close eye on Jesse’s reaction. They had only used the ropes on Emma a few times, and never since New York. He wanted to be sure he didn’t overstep and create undue anxiety in Jesse too soon. Jesse did watch. He never shifted his attention from Emma’s body, from Gideon’s quick hands as he worked the 46

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knots. But he seemed to be watching with more curiosity than anything—until Gideon took the ends of the rope over Emma’s shoulders and pulled them beneath the strands circling the tops and bottoms of her chest. As Gideon pulled the rope tight, separating her breasts, Jesse straightened in his chair, and the line of his erection was obvious against his pants. He would have been more comfortable if he unzipped himself, but he kept his hands at his side, clutching the edge of the chair. Emma was panting by the time Gideon was done, and she cried out when he skimmed his palm over her erect nipple. “Isn’t she pretty like this?” he murmured. “All the blood is rushing to the surface of her skin. When I touch her with the gloves on, she’ll practically burst.” Gideon licked up her neck, being careful not to press too close and aggravate her new tattoo. She wasn’t nearly as tolerant of the pain as Jesse was; the last thing Gideon wanted was for her not to enjoy this. “But don’t worry, Em. I’ll clean up whatever mess I make. You have my word.” Jesse didn’t move. He didn’t even fidget. But Gideon knew he wanted to. Especially when Gideon ran his hand over Emma’s nipples again and again. Each time she cried out, Gideon heard the slightest of whimpers coming from Jesse’s throat. He remained attuned to each change in Jesse’s body, waiting for a hint of anxiety coming from Jesse himself, or being transmitted through Emma’s body. But there was none of that. Just sharp desire, growing sharper by the moment. “You’d like a taste of her, wouldn’t you, boy?” 47

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“Yes, Sir,” Jesse whispered tightly. Gideon pinched a swollen nipple. “Get the rest of her clothes off then. Maybe I’ll feel generous.” Jesse moved stiffly, dropping to his knees in front of Emma. Gideon detected the smallest trace of a tremble in Jesse’s fingers as he hooked his fingers around the waistband of her skirt. He tugged the material down her thighs and let it drop to the floor. Her underwear followed. Jesse paused for just a moment when he exposed her pussy, already glistening with arousal, but he knew better than to touch. Instead, Jesse cupped her ankles, lifting one, then the other, to help her step out of the clothes around her feet. “Your turn,” Gideon said, nodding toward Jesse’s clothes. “I can’t fuck you if you still have your pants on.” Jesse was already moving by the time Gideon stepped back from Emma. Resting a hand on her shoulder, he pushed her firmly to her knees before crouching down to pick up the gloves she had dropped. He pulled them on, fighting the urge to vamp out just yet as Jesse’s hard cock came into view. A drop of pearly fluid already collected at the tip. Gideon wanted to join Emma down there and swallow it down, but that would have to come later. “Face her,” he ordered once Jesse was naked. Jesse dutifully stood in front of her, his cock near her lips. Gideon almost saw the spark of electricity jumping between their flesh, and if the two of them had been alone, Gideon had no doubt that Emma’s mouth would have already been around the crown. 48

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Gideon stood next to both of them, his body brushing against arms, shoulders. He heard every time Emma swallowed. He felt every time Jesse shivered. “This thing about being scared…” He kept his voice low, not looking away from Jesse’s profile as he skimmed his fingertips over Jesse’s stomach. The barbs embedded in the leather prickled as they moved downward, leaving faint red scratches along the pale skin. “It stops. Here. Because Emma and I are going to prove to you once and for all how much we love you.” He bypassed Jesse’s cock to cup his balls, stroking the velvety sac so that Jesse felt every single one of the pins in the gloves. Only after Jess started shaking from the sensations did Gideon curl his fingers around the base of his shaft. “Open, Emma. Show Jesse how much you love him.” Jesse’s breath caught, and Emma looked up with soft, eager eyes. She leaned forward and closed her lips around Jesse’s head. Gideon held Jesse’s cock steady and Emma moved her mouth farther down his shaft. By the time Emma’s lips brushed against Gideon’s leather glove, Jesse was panting. Gideon knew that before, Jesse would have had much better control over his responses, but it had been too long since Gideon had topped him like this, too long since Jesse had experienced this sort of contrast between pain and pleasure. “Don’t move,” he warned Emma. Without loosening his grip on Jesse, Gideon bent just enough to drag his other hand over the top of her breast, the pressure only a tad slighter than what he had used on Jesse. 49

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She cried out, except her mouth was full of Jesse’s cock, muffling the sound. Jesse remained still, Emma’s lips and Gideon’s fingers tight around his cock. But he shivered with the effort of not moving. Emma kept her eyes open, staring up through her lashes as Gideon ran his palm over her breasts again and again, leaving small cuts that welled up with the barest trickle of blood. Each drop flowed down her chest, running into each other, streams growing bigger as they traveled toward her nipple. Gideon leaned closer, his mouth at Jesse’s ear. “Do you know how delicious she smells? But I should clean her up before we stain the rope, don’t you think?” Jesse watched Gideon’s hand moving over Emma’s breast for a long moment, almost as if he didn’t hear Gideon’s question at all. Gideon continued to rub and massage her tight skin, creating more tiny marks, waiting for Jesse’s answer. Finally, in a raw voice, he whispered, “Yes, Sir.” With a smile that was as hungry as it was knowing, Gideon knelt beside them. He grasped Emma’s chin and eased her off Jesse’s cock, leaning in to kiss her swollen mouth before she could voice her protest. “I have to clean the mess I’ve made,” he said when he pulled back. Angling his hold on Jesse, he dragged the tip through the scarlet scratches, smearing the blood on both of them. “Jess might as well enjoy it, too.” Without another word, he turned his head and licked the satiny crown of Jesse’s cock. 50

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Jesse gasped, and the gasp turned into a moan. The rich taste of Emma’s blood on top of Jesse’s hot skin made the back of Gideon’s throat tingle. He dragged his tongue across the tip, a little amused when Jesse’s knees bent like he wouldn’t be able to support his own weight. He cleaned Jesse’s cock of every drop of the dark liquid before it dried, and then chased each salty drop of pre-come as it gathered at the slit. Gideon was unable to resist the intoxicating combination, and he guided Jesse’s cock over Emma’s breast again. He had tasted her blood on the rare occasion, though even now, almost a year after being together as a threesome, Gideon had yet to bite her. Jesse had requested from the start he not, and they had agreed that unless Emma asked for it, that was a boundary Gideon wouldn’t break. She had been growing more adventuresome in their more extreme sex play before the incidents in New York, but that had slipped back to early standards in light of Jesse’s trauma. If her moans were anything to gauge by, Gideon thought that they were well on their way to returning to that place. He coated Jesse’s cock again and again, each time licking it clean. The temptation to mark Emma even more and continue savoring this delicious elixir of her blood and Jesse’s pre-come threatened to distract Gideon from his purpose. He had to stand and let go of Jesse in order to resist it. “Swallow him down again.” Moving behind Jess, he rested a hand flat above Jesse’s cock, keeping him still as Emma obeyed. His other hand worked at his fly, freeing his erection. 51

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“Next time, I’ll bleed you, boy,” he murmured in Jesse’s ear. “And eat it out of our girl. You’d like that, wouldn’t you?” “Oh…” The muscles in Jesse’s arms and back tightened as Emma’s lips reached the bottom of his shaft. “Yes, Sir.” Both Jesse and Emma closed their eyes, and the surge of desire leapt from the two of them. Hunger flowed from Jesse into Emma, and then she echoed it back, amplified. Gideon knew they didn’t create this sort of feedback loop on purpose—it was just a natural effect of Emma’s empathic abilities. “May I touch her, please?” Gideon chuckled. “That’s not what you really want. If you want to fuck her face, that’s what you should ask for.” Jesse looked from her to Gideon, his eyes dark. “May I fuck her face, please, Sir?” “Not yet.” As hard as it was, he stepped away from the scene, peeling off the gloves as he crossed to the cupboard to grab some lube. “Not until I’m splitting your ass, boy.” Emma moaned around Jesse’s cock, diverting him from his disappointment long enough for Gideon to return. He wasted no time slicking up his fingers, watching the muscles clench in Jesse’s ass as Emma slowly sucked up and down his shaft. It had been a long time since he’d torn into Jesse. Fear of bringing back painful memories—even if Marcus hadn’t assaulted him like that—was enough to stifle Gideon’s more violent tendencies. But Jesse smelled like heaven now, and he responded to every added stimulus with more enthusiasm than Gideon had seen in months. Slipping his finger between the taut cheeks, 52

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Gideon sought the tight ring, biting back the groan that mirrored Jesse’s when he pressed two fingers inside. Jesse clenched around his fingers and dropped his head back. Bliss marked his face, but he didn’t close his eyes. His gaze was locked on Gideon’s face, his lips parted with sharp gasps. Gideon thrust his wrist until Jesse began to relax around his fingers, and then he added a third, forcing Jesse to adjust to the extra width. By the time Gideon added a fourth finger, the pants turned into words. “Please…Sir…Please…Gideon…” It had been far too long since he’d heard such need in Jesse’s pleas. Long enough to make him want to hear it again. “Please?” He twisted his hand, screwing his fingers deeper into the tight channel. “Please what?” “Please fuck me, Sir. Please…” His voice faltered for a moment. “Please, Gideon, I need you.” Guilt flared inside him. Wrapping one arm around Jesse’s waist, he held him still as he positioned himself at Jesse’s opening. Gideon pressed his mouth to the soft spot before Jesse’s ear as he slowly pushed his way inside. “Emma wants your cock, boy. Don’t disappoint her.” Finally given the permission he had sought earlier, Jesse unclenched his hands and reached for Emma. But he didn’t immediately grip her head like Gideon expected him to. His fingers caressed her cheek and pushed her hair away from her damp forehead. Gideon paused as fresh lust jumped between Jesse and Emma like sparks of electricity. It made Jesse’s skin tight and hot, made his blood smell even sweeter. Emma slid 53

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her mouth up Jesse’s cock until her lips were wrapped loosely around his crown. Jesse slid one hand beneath her hair to cup the back of her head, then thrust forward, filling her mouth. As soon as Jesse was buried in her, Gideon pushed his cock past Jesse’s tight ring and into his slick passage. Muscles clenched, and bodies vibrated, and three moans filled the room. Part of it was Emma’s doing. She was taking everything Gideon and Jesse were feeling and transmitting it back, stealing a hand around to Gideon’s hip in order to strengthen the physical contact. Though she kept herself open to them most of the time, she had become very careful about what she sent back, unwilling to amplify Jesse’s anxiety, or to let on that she and Gideon were all too aware of his pain. This was a welcome respite from the aching loneliness that had punctuated the last six months. Though nobody had physically left, Gideon had missed the warmth of having both of them not only near, but happy. Dropping his mouth to Jesse’s shoulder, he bit and licked along the slope as he drove in and out of Jesse’s ass. He refused hesitation, denied the impulse to take it easy on Jess. Every stroke had his balls slapping that tight flesh, and he pushed even harder, embracing the heated sting it created on his skin. Gideon never let himself lose control, never went so far he wasn’t aware of every single one of Jesse’s reactions. He listened for a change in his heartbeat and the sound of his moans, his sensitive nose waiting for the unmistakable smell of fear or distress. But Jesse seemed lost in the experience. He 54

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never asked for a reprieve. His words, when they were coherent, were only pleas for more, matched by Emma’s low moans and the hungry sounds she made in the back of her throat. But Gideon knew he could put his remaining fears to rest when Jesse tilted his head up and back, exposing his throat. A shiver ran through him. Presenting the site of the very first time he’d bitten Jesse was the surest way to drive him crazy. Jesse knew that. A small part of Gideon rejoiced in the victory that it was. His fangs descended. Without breaking his rhythm, Gideon dragged the tips along Jesse’s neck, just barely breaking the skin. “I know what I said,” he murmured. “But I think I’m going to get a taste of you right here instead. We can both eat out Emma after you shoot down her throat then.” “Yes…please…yes…” The words were redundant. Every single one of Gideon’s senses registered Jesse’s need, his arousal. The smallest hint of his blood filled Gideon’s nose, glanced over his tongue. Before Jesse could plead again, he let his teeth sink into his tender skin, hot blood immediately filling his mouth. He couldn’t help the growl that rumbled through his chest. As he sucked at the tensing muscle, Gideon tightened his hold around Jesse’s waist, slamming harder and harder into his ass. The heat was overwhelming, wrapping around his cock, filling his mouth, and when he heard Emma’s muted whimper, red washed over Gideon’s senses as everything erupted. He coated 55

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Jesse’s passage with blast after blast of come, all the while swallowing down the blood that still flowed over his tongue. Jesse cried out, the shout vibrating through his body and against Gideon’s lips. Jesse’s body convulsed, his muscles clenching tightly around Gideon’s cock and, distantly, he heard the sounds of Emma swallowing Jesse’s come as he shot into her throat. Gideon didn’t retract his fangs until Jesse stopped shaking, his body suddenly going lax against Gideon’s chest. Emma’s fingertips grazed over Gideon’s arm, sending a fresh cascade of tremors up his spine. Almost lazily, he licked over the fresh puncture wounds on Jesse’s neck, chasing the last few droplets of blood that oozed at the holes’ edges. “I picked that tattoo for a reason,” he said softly. “When a dragon makes a circle like that, it means eternity. That’s us, Jess. No matter what.” Jesse reached up, sliding his fingers over Gideon’s cheek and ear in the lightest caress before turning his head. His touch might have been light, but his mouth wasn’t. He pressed his lips against Gideon’s in an almost desperate kiss. Jesse didn’t need to speak, didn’t need to tell him what he was thinking or feeling. His mouth told Gideon everything without making a sound. When Emma’s soft sigh washed over both of them, Gideon loosened his hold, reaching to curl his fingers in her hair. “You know we’re not done here. Somebody still hasn’t come yet.” Jesse pulled away slightly, and Gideon let him drop to his 56

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knees without protest. Jesse cupped her face, his fingers curling against her skin, and kissed her with the same sort of passion he had unleashed on Gideon. Moaning, Emma instantly melted against him. He watched them for a moment without moving, dark against light, light against dark. Soft. Hard. All his. By the time Gideon joined Jesse on the floor, his heart wasn’t nearly as heavy as it had been. Journeys always began with a step. Regardless of the path they had to take to get there, he was all of a sudden certain they were on their way.

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CHAPTER 5 Jesse felt there should be more. He wore a pair of jeans, a T-shirt, and a light jacket. He had insisted on carrying a small bag, though both Gideon and Michelle told him it wasn’t necessary. He wasn’t traveling to an unknown universe, after all. It was just Chicago. A Chicago they would recognize. A city Gideon would know intimately. Only what they wore or carried would pass into the other dimension. Jesse watched Michelle make her preparations in the middle of the abandoned street. She didn’t look like the woman he had known for almost five years. She looked younger, like a mask had fallen from her face, but at the same time, each line of her body seemed ancient. His hand was 58

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folded in Emma’s, and he didn’t want to let her go. Waves of reassurance passed from her, keeping him calm, soothing his nerves, but it wasn’t quite enough to make him sanguine about the plan. Gideon stood off to the side, watching the preparations with a thoughtful mien. Jesse had expected there to be tension between Michelle and Gideon, and he supposed there was, but they were both on their best behavior. It was stunning, and more than a little humbling, to think of the lengths both of them were willing to go to for him. “Everything is ready,” Michelle announced. “Remember, from the moment you cross to the other dimension, you have only five days. I’m sending you back four days before Mary’s church is attacked. That should give you enough time to track down the vampires.” “No worries there,” Gideon said. “I already know where we’re going to find them.” Emma frowned as she glanced over at him. “How?” The dark night kept his eyes shadowed, but Jesse caught the way he held his shoulders so stiffly. “I already killed them once. I just get to do it while it can still mean something this time.” Emma squeezed Jesse’s fingers, a silent reminder of a conversation they had early that morning. Don’t just let him kill things. But killing things seemed like a perfectly reasonable plan to Jesse. Stake a few vamps, maybe take a few days off to relax, and then get back to their own world. “You two, come over here,” Michelle said. 59

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Jesse raised Emma’s hand to his mouth and brushed his lips across her knuckles. They exchanged a brief smile, and then he released her and went to stand at the spot Michelle pointed to. Gideon stood at Jesse’s side, their shoulders skimming comfortably against each other. “I suppose asking for the how to manual on all of this is out of the question,” he commented dryly. “My existence is dedicated to keeping the how to manual out of your hands. Jesse, take his hand.” Jesse obediently slipped his fingers through Gideon’s. “You must return to this point exactly five days later. Jesse, do you understand?” “I do,” Jesse said softly. “Five days. We won’t miss it, Michelle. I promise.” She nodded, satisfied. “Close your eyes.” Jesse’s eyelids dropped and he tightened his grip. He expected Michelle to say something—some sort of magic words. He expected to feel something. Surely, passing through the fabric of reality would be warm, or itchy, or cold. Curious about what was happening around him, he cracked one eye open. Michelle and Emma were gone. The sidewalk was still deserted, but the storefront that had been to their side was gone. In its place was the foreboding edifice of an aged apartment building, the faint blue glow of televisions visible through closed curtains. The air smelled different as well, cleaner if that was possible, more like the 60

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lake, and as they stood there, an old Chevy Impala rounded the corner, its round headlights slicing through the darkness. Gideon’s hand loosened from his. “Holy fuck…” he whispered. Jesse spun in a full circle, trying to take in every single detail, trying to convince himself that Emma and Michelle were really gone. Except, that was wrong. Michelle and Emma weren’t gone. He and Gideon were. “I can’t believe that was it. I thought it’d be more…dramatic.” Gideon wasn’t moving. Only his eyes swept over the landscape, lingering a few extra seconds on a shadow here, a few more on a signpost. “Small confession here. I wasn’t completely convinced Michelle would actually be able to do it.” “Well, she sent us somewhere.” Jesse ran his hand down his chest and over his arms, unconsciously checking for any sign of injury. When Gideon still didn’t move, Jesse touched his hand. “Are you okay?” “Yeah. Peachy.” Except he still wasn’t budging. Just as Jesse was going to press further, Gideon lifted both hands and ran them over his head, pushing his hair back before folding his fingers together at the back of his skull. “You have no idea how weird this is. I didn’t even spend that much time at this place, but it’s like…” Shaking his head, he let his arms drop. “What about you? You all right?” “Yeah. Yeah, all things considered. Should we get off the 61

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street?” Nodding, Gideon turned on his heel and headed straight for the darkened doorway of the apartment building. He led Jesse past the mailboxes and down the stairs, stopping at the very first door beside the landing. “At least I don’t have to worry about running into myself tonight.” The door opened without being forced, and Gideon hit the light switch on the wall as he stepped inside. “That’s one less thing to worry about.” Jesse followed Gideon into the room, quickly taking in every detail. He hadn’t expected something so sparse. Gideon enjoyed his comforts, and this apartment was far from comfortable. The living room had two chairs near a small table, and he could see the tiny bedroom through the open door. Whatever Gideon rented this space for, he didn’t use it often. “Why don’t you have to worry about running into yourself?” “My car’s not parked out front.” He disappeared into the bedroom, the sound of the closet opening followed almost immediately by a small chuckle. “I knew I’d left it here.” Jesse dropped his bag on the table and followed him. “What?” Gideon knelt in front of the closet, digging through a hardshelled suitcase. “Just stuff I’d picked up here and there. This place burns down in about six months, and I lost everything that I kept here.” He pulled out a sheaf of letters, rubberbanded together. His long fingers traced along the worn edges 62

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of the envelopes before he tossed it back into the case. “Nothing important. And nothing that’s going to help us kill those vamps.” Jesse studied Gideon’s face for a moment before speaking. It didn’t look like it was nothing. It looked like whatever the suitcase held, Gideon was very happy to see it again. Like he would be happy to see Mary again? As soon as the question occurred to Jesse, he tried to dismiss it. “Maybe you can take a few things back with us,” Jesse suggested. “Well, Michelle never said you couldn’t.” Straightening, Gideon waved off the suggestion. “I’ve gone forty years without it. There’s nothing in there we need.” He went around the side of the bed and crouched down again, pulling out another case and setting this one on the mattress. “I’ve got extra weapons in here to use tonight. We can use them when we go…” His voice faded as a scowl settled over his features. “Well, fuck.” The bed creaked beneath Jesse’s weight as he sat at the foot of it. “What’s wrong?” “More than half the stakes are gone. Why…” His mouth tightened into a line as he clearly concentrated on figuring out the mystery of the missing weapons. Within thirty seconds, he grimaced. “Damn it. We raided the cache. I forgot.” Jesse glanced over and counted at least five stakes in the case, as well as an axe. “How many vampires are there?” “Eight of them showed up at the church that night. But five of them were brought in just for that. If we go after the three in charge of the raid tonight, that’ll stop them from ever getting 63

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to Mary in the first place.” Jesse nodded. Three vampires were nothing. Gideon could take three vampires without blinking. Hell, even he could take three vampires without Gideon’s help. But he was still nervous. “I guess you know where to find them.” “Their nest isn’t far from here. That was another reason I picked this spot. We don’t have transportation so I knew we’d be hoofing it.” It occurred to Jesse that he could suggest they had plenty of time. Four days until the attack. But Gideon would not entertain the thought of waiting. Jesse stood and picked out two stakes, sliding one in his jacket pocket. “Then we should get moving.” Jesse led the way back into the still night. He tried to ignore the old cars on the street, the odd aroma in the air, and the fact that in this world, he wasn’t even born yet. He held the stake so tightly a sliver embedded itself in his palm, but he didn’t loosen his grip. They went two blocks before Gideon broke the silence wrapped around them. “I’m sorry. I didn’t expect to feel like this.” Jesse glanced at him from the corner of his eye. “Feel like what?” “Lost.” Gideon stared straight ahead. “Nervous.” The urge to suggest they wait overtook him again. If Gideon was nervous, surely they should wait. And if Jesse told him flatly that he wasn’t comfortable with this, that he wanted to rest, Gideon wouldn’t make him continue. He was far too 64

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worried about Jesse to force him to do something he didn’t want him to do. His palm felt hot and itchy, and the bottoms of his feet tingled. “You don’t need to be nervous. We’ve faced worse than vampires.” Gideon snorted, a small sound that was nearly smothered by the low thud of passing traffic. “It’s not the vampires that worry me. It’s the ghosts.” “I was hoping it was the vampires,” Jesse murmured. “Is it…” He gestured at the surrounding neighborhood. “Just like you remember?” He caught the glint of light reflecting off his eyes as Gideon glanced around. “Yes and no,” he replied quietly. “I never used this apartment very much when…when I was with Mary. We didn’t get around to this side of town, so I didn’t get caught out at dawn very often to need it. But I remember enough.” “What do you remember?” Jesse asked, giving in to his curiosity, but not really expecting an answer. Gideon pointed to the corner across the street. “There’s a diner halfway down that block that only serves breakfast and lunch. Biggest omelets you’ve ever seen. Coffee so black, it looks like tar. Guy who owned it was named…” He paused, searching for it. “Marius. He closed up at four every day because his wife worked down at the high school and that’s when she got home. He always said he worked too hard already not to be able to spend time with the one thing in his life that really mattered.” 65

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“I never imagined you as the type to chat with local diner owners back then.” Jesse frowned. “Or now, for that matter. What happened to…Marius?” “I don’t know. I never came back to this side of town after the fire.” They walked along several more yards before he added, “I didn’t chat. That was all Mary. She always wanted to talk to people.” Gideon turned his head and gave him a small, but warm smile. “You do that, too. It’s infuriating sometimes, but I’ve always loved that about you.” Jesse returned his smile. He knew that his tendency to draw everybody he met into a conversation drove Gideon crazy. If only because Gideon was often in a hurry—too big of a hurry to chat with random people. But somehow, he wasn’t surprised that Gideon had fallen in love with another person who shared that particular trait. “I always knew that she was the reason you chose to help people rather than kill them. But I guess I never thought about the smaller ways she influenced you.” At Gideon’s raised brow, he added, “She showed you that Marius wasn’t just food.” Something passed behind Gideon’s eyes, gone before Jesse could put a label on it. “Yeah, maybe. I think in Marius’s case, it was more that I knew how much she loved his fried potatoes. He was important to her, so that made him important to me.” Jesse knew Gideon was trying to discount what Jesse had said, but it was still true. He also knew Gideon had still been hunting when he was with Mary, so her influence hadn’t been 66

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complete. But it was a start, a genesis for the man he would become. The man walking beside him now. “But it still counted for something. Any ideas about what we’re going to do after we kill the vamps?” “Kill some more?” “For the next five days?” Gideon grinned. “No, I figured we’d be fucking during the day, killing stuff at night. Unless you have a problem with that plan.” Jesse lifted his shoulder in a half-shrug. “I personally don’t have a problem with that plan. Except Emma told me I can’t just let you kill things, and Michelle said I’m supposed to be dealing with my issues.” “Yeah, well, Michelle and Emma aren’t here, now are they?” “No, they’re not. And I sort of miss the simplicity of killing stuff at night and fucking during the day.” He hadn’t meant them to, but his words seemed to sober Gideon’s mood. “I’ll give you the address of the church. Maybe you can go down there tomorrow and look around.” “Will Marcus be there during the day in the middle of the week?” “Shouldn’t be. That’s why I thought you could go tomorrow. See what it’s like first. Get past the jitters without having to worry about running into him.” Gideon was right. He should go there when it was empty and get accustomed to the space. Maybe even check and double check escape routes—just in case he couldn’t handle it. 67

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“I suppose it’s too late to tell you I don’t want to see him.” “A little.” Gideon paused. “Just like it’s too late for me to tell you I wish you didn’t have to.” “Will you be going to the church sometime, too?” Jesse knew he had to see Marcus. He didn’t know if he was expected to see Marcus on his own. Though he wouldn’t be surprised if Gideon wanted to avoid the entire situation. He wasn’t eager to bring Gideon face to face with Mary. “I don’t know.” The wistful tone was back. “I don’t like the thought of not being there when you see Brooker for the first time, but I don’t know how to explain being there. And I don’t know how I’d explain it to Mary if I saw her. Because she’s going to know I’m not…the other me.” Jesse almost made a joke about how Gideon hadn’t really changed his look in the past forty years, but he knew what Gideon meant. If he were to meet the other Gideon, he was certain he wouldn’t be confused or fooled. “Well, maybe it’s best if I meet him alone. I used to be able to do things on my own all the time.” He didn’t expect the cool glide of fingers across his, but he curled his hand into Gideon’s just the same. “You have so much strength in you.” Gideon was lost in shadows, the streetlights flirting with the planes of his face. “I’ve always known that.” A compliment from Gideon would always make him warm with pleasure. And on some level, Jesse knew what Gideon said must be true. How could he help Gideon if he didn’t have strength inside of him? How could he face the sort of horrors 68

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they saw every week if he wasn’t strong? How could he be a good partner for either Gideon or Emma if he were weak? “Always?” he asked lightly. “Even when you were saving me from vampires and chastising me for wandering around Chicago after dark?” “I said strong. I didn’t say smart.” Jesse snorted. “I figured you just kept me around for my good looks. I’m dumb but pretty.” “Don’t forget the begging. That’s a turn-on.” “Yeah, but you’re so easy, I never have to beg for long.” Gideon’s brows shot up. “You did not just dare me.” Jesse looked at him with all the innocence he could muster. “I might have. I’m dumb, remember?” They came to a halt. Before Jesse could blink, Gideon’s hand was strong at his nape, pulling him hard against his chest as their mouths clashed. The kiss was brief but brutal, leaving him tense and aching by the time they separated. “Focus on the strong for now and we’ll leave the begging for later.” He jerked his head toward the building behind them. “We’re here.” Jesse looked at the building, expecting dread, but instead he felt an undeniable tingle of excitement. Like the first time Gideon had invited him to help clean out a nest. If he separated the situation from all his baggage, then he could look at it objectively. And objectively, they were saving a vibrant young woman from an untimely end. It was something they had done a hundred times before. Suddenly, the stake 69

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didn’t feel so awkward in his hand. He spun it in his fingers and smiled. “After you.”

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CHAPTER 6 There was nothing like a good kill. A good kill worked muscles that begged for satisfaction. Shoulders tight. Arms tighter. Fists unyielding. A good kill fed fear into a vampire’s bloodstream, blending with power already unleashed to create something new, something stronger, something ready to destroy again. A good kill was like a good fuck. Pounding and pounding culminating in an explosion of sensation, leaving your skin raging and your hunger sated. Until it began to ebb and the addiction to have more returned. Only one thing made a good kill better. Killing bastards for the taste of revenge. 71

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Gideon’s knuckles were torn and bleeding. One of the vampires had caught his shirt and ripped it half off his body, leaving shreds dangling from his left shoulder, while another had swung a knife at him, slicing an arc that ran from midabdomen to his armpit. Neither one of them had lasted for more than minute after that. The armed vamp found his throat slit with the very same blade, right before Gideon sawed through the sinew to decapitate him. Jesse got the other one in a graceful fight that made Gideon harder than the blood that coated the air. The third begged for mercy. He saw his buddies go down, and the bravado he’d worn at the start of the confrontation vanished. He crab-walked into a corner, trying to get away, all the while blubbering how he’d always respected Gideon, how he thought Gideon was getting the short end of the stick, how he’d help Gideon if Gideon only let him live. Gideon didn’t believe him for a second. He turned on the gas stove in the apartment’s kitchen and held the vampire’s head in the flame, holding his kicking, screaming, squirming body until the fire had spread far enough to make the vampire crumble into ash. Walking out of that building was the most liberating thing Gideon had ever done. Mary’s killers were dead. No matter what else happened in this dimension, Mary was going to survive. Jesse followed him into the dark alley, silent except for the automatic reactions he couldn’t control—the rapid beat of his heart, hurried breathing, the roar of his blood, running fast and 72

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hot near the surface of his skin. All of his senses were still heightened, a predator that hadn’t quite had his fill. And Jesse was right at his hand, his body bowstring tight. Gideon reached for him as soon as they were enveloped by shadows, pinning him against the wall with his larger frame. Jesse didn’t make a sound or movement of protest. He gripped Gideon’s arms, his mouth ready for what amounted to more of an attack than a kiss. There was a moment, fleeting as it was, where Gideon wondered how Jesse felt about facing all the violence in destroying Mary’s killers. For as much as he wanted things back to normal, he’d been careful about exposing Jess to the fights, wary of eliciting memories of his time with Brooker. This was the most graphic display Jesse had seen in months. The last thing he wanted was for him to take a step back in healing. But the fervor with which he returned Gideon’s kiss banished those thoughts. With their hard cocks rubbing against each other, Jesse’s nails digging into Gideon’s arms, all Gideon wanted was to devour his lover in ways that had been denied him for far too long. He pulled back from the kiss with the scent of arousal spinning his head. “Need to fuck you, boy,” he growled. “And then I think I’ll have to fuck you again.” Jesse nodded, gulping for air. “Yes…please.” He pushed Gideon’s tattered shirt away from his chest, his fingernails scraping across taut muscles as his hands moved further down 73

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Gideon’s body. He paused when he reached the zipper on Gideon’s pants. “Can I?” Gideon glanced down. Jesse’s hands trembled, though he had a sneaking suspicion that was more out of desire than anything else. That knowledge just made Gideon ache even more. “You should probably get closer to see what you’re doing.” Gripping the back of Jesse’s neck, he slowly pushed Jess down, forcing him to sink to his knees. “Now you can.” Jesse looked up for a moment, his eyes shaded and heavy, before he turned his attention back to his task. He freed Gideon’s cock from his pants quickly, running his hot palm up and down his shaft once before leaning forward. Gideon felt the heat from his mouth moments before contact, and the promise of Jesse’s perfect lips wrapping around his cock was enough to make him shudder. Jesse moaned as soon as his tongue touched the head, the tip dancing across the slit, gathering pre-come. The urge to grip Jesse’s head and forget courtesy, forget niceties, forget six months of panic and pain, almost overwhelmed Gideon. He was already high on the kills. Hard. Ready to hurt some more. It would be simple to capitulate to his baser desires and fuck Jesse’s mouth until his lover’s throat was raw. And Jesse would let him. Gideon only had to look into his desire-dark eyes to know he was willing. But this was about small steps. He wouldn’t hurt Jesse until Jesse asked him to. Begged for it. Gideon could control himself until that day came again. 74

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He kept hold of the back of Jesse’s neck, however. Leaning forward, he braced himself against the wall, palm flat, while he pulled Jesse’s mouth further down his cock. Jess clutched at Gideon’s thigh, digging into the tense muscles, and sighed as the tip nudged into his throat. “Fuck, yeah,” Gideon muttered. “Take it.” For just a moment, Gideon thought Jesse would resist, maybe even pull away. And if he did, Gideon knew he’d have to let him. But the hesitation was over as quickly as it began, and the muscles in Jesse’s throat relaxed as Gideon applied more pressure to the back of his neck. Soon, Jess’s nose was buried in the hair at the base of Gideon’s cock. Gideon held him there for a few seconds, sighing as Jesse moan and swallowed, his throat constricting around his shaft. He couldn’t tear his eyes away from watching Jesse’s lips drag along his cock when he slid back up its length. This was worth the slower, more deliberate pace. There were few sights more beautiful than that red mouth against his pale skin, or the hollow of his cheekbones as he sucked a little harder, or the curve of Jesse’s dark lashes as he lifted his gaze upward. Gideon’s heart leapt as Jesse sank down his shaft again, this time without pausing before swallowing him down. “Look at my little cockslut. You wanted this all night. I think you would’ve blown me right there in the apartment if I’d let you.” Jesse’s agreement was shapeless and muffled, but it was an agreement all the same. He was struck by a fresh wave of arousal, as if to confirm how much Jesse wanted it. Gideon let him set his own pace at first, his body flexing and shaking 75

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with each slow stroke. But gradually, Jesse moved faster, harder, his rhythm coming closer to what Gideon secretly wanted. “That’s it…” The litany of encouragement continued, and Gideon leaned farther against the wall, angling his body so that his forehead rested against his forearm. It gave Jesse less room to move, forced his cock deeper on every stroke, but it still wasn’t enough. The desire to pound matched the desire to own, coiling into a single beast that raged beneath Gideon’s skin. It roared, and it hissed, and it sent tendrils of electricity to every nerve ending until his hand shook where it gripped Jesse’s neck. “Fuck…fuck…” If Jess kept this up, Gideon knew he was going to hurt him. And until he heard the words, he knew he couldn’t. Abruptly, he let Jesse go, straightening and standing back as he fisted his cock. “Open your mouth,” he ordered. He could mark his boy in other ways. Jesse straightened, his chin tilted up, his mouth open. He looked like he could patiently wait all night in that position, but that was undermined by the racing of his heart and the hungry look in his eyes. “Please, Gideon.” The words were low and guttural, and his lips barely moved. “Let me taste you.” The intent went straight to his gut. Groaning, Gideon tightened his grip, his hand nearly a blur as he stripped his cock. He locked eyes with Jesse, unable to look away, grateful 76

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he didn’t need to breathe. Because everything was closing in, honing in on that alley, that wall, that man, that mouth. That supplication in his brilliant blue eyes. Gideon came with a growl, the surprise jerking his hand so that the first blast landed at the corner of Jesse’s lips instead of where he’d aimed. The second, third, fourth, all hit squarely on Jesse’s waiting tongue, leaving Gideon shaking and shuddering while he milked the rest of the come from the dripping slit. Jesse kept his mouth open, a waiting target until the last string of fluid hit his lips. He swallowed before the tip of his tongue darted out to sample the come still on his face. Before Jesse had a chance to clean his lips and chin completely, Gideon grabbed him by the shoulders and hauled him to his feet. His back met the wall again and his soft groan was silenced by Gideon’s mouth. He thrust his tongue past Jesse’s lips, seeking out every taste, forcing him to share. Jesse grabbed Gideon’s side, but the dig of his fingers caught in the still-bleeding cut, and the salt from his skin drew a hiss from Gideon’s throat. “Everything always burns with you.” Molding his hand over Jesse’s erection, Gideon squeezed the length until Jess gasped. “Think it’ll burn if I fuck you without lube?” Jesse nodded quickly, enthusiastically. “Please…” A strangled moan cut off the request as Gideon tightened his fingers around Jesse’s shaft again. Jesse was throbbing—every inch of his body seemed to be pulsating against Gideon’s. “Oh, God…” Gideon eased the pressure again and words 77

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spilled from Jesse’s throat. “Want you…Gideon…please…” As driving as the need to consume him was, the need to hear how badly he wanted it was even more so. Gideon flattened his palm along the length to slide down and cup Jesse’s balls. “Maybe I should wait,” he mused. “It’s not like I haven’t taken the edge off, and you don’t really need to come, do you?” Before he gave Jesse the chance to answer, however, he squeezed the denim-covered sac. “I do, please, I do.” Gideon’s only response was to squeeze him again. Jesse whimpered, a low, satisfying sound. He could almost see Jesse’s heart, thumping wildly against his ribs. “God…please Gideon—Sir—fuck me. Please.” Gideon began flexing and relaxing his fingers, and Jesse’s voice rose and fell with it. “I’m yours…Gideon…please…” Without letting go, Gideon leaned in and licked a long path down the side of Jesse’s neck. Jesse shuddered and immediately tilted his head, but when Gideon reached the curve of his shoulder, he paused long enough to let his fangs descend, dropping his jaw a little farther in order to skim a matching trail back up. This one left two skinny scratches all the way to Jesse’s ear. “Mine,” Gideon whispered. “But I can’t bury my cock in you if you’re still dressed, now can I, boy?” Jesse released him, leaving ten hot marks on Gideon’s skin, and fumbled with his pants. Gideon didn’t look down, but he did hear the whisper of leather sliding against metal as Jesse unbuckled his belt, and the click of freeing the button, 78

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and the sharp sound of the zipper’s teeth. Jesse gasped as the cool air struck his heated skin, and his cock slipped out of his open pants. “Please…please…” Jesse didn’t take a breath without uttering another supplication. His mouth watered at the fresh scent of pre-come assaulting his senses. If he hadn’t felt the muscles already clenching in Jesse’s body, he would have dropped to his knees that instant and swallowed him down. But they were both too far gone at that point to settle for anything less than Gideon splitting Jesse’s ass. They both needed this. Grabbing Jesse’s hips, Gideon whirled him around, facing him toward the brick wall. He shoved the jeans downward, exposing heated skin and taut muscles, but when the belt buckle banged against Gideon’s hand, he got an idea. “If I’m going to ride you…” He whisked the leather strap free of the loops, the satisfying snap it made making Jesse jump. “I’m going to need something to hold on to.” Gideon looped the belt around Jesse’s throat, then pulled the leather through the buckle, creating a makeshift collar. He wrapped the tail around his hand loosely, and Jesse hissed as he pulled it tight. He shifted back, and the blunt tip of Gideon’s cock pressed against his waiting hole. Jesse’s body was hot and vibrating, a ball of lightning beneath his taut skin. It had been a long time since he’d felt such need quivering in his lover’s body. It might have been the leather wrapped around Jesse’s neck, a reminder of freer days before everything they did got second-guessed. It might have been 79

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the pleas that still fell from his lips, begging like Gideon had not heard in even longer. Whatever it was, Gideon couldn’t ignore it, and more importantly, didn’t want to. Pulling back just enough on the belt, he pressed his hips forward, reaching around to grip Jesse’s shaft as he slowly sank into his clenching channel. “Oh…yes…Gideon…yes…thank you…” As Gideon sheathed himself, Jesse’s words had faded completely, replaced by soft, hitching moans. There was still enough slack in the belt to allow him to breathe freely, but by the time Gideon was buried in his ass completely, even his breathing seemed to stop. Gideon forced himself to remain still, his body jolting each time Jesse’s muscles flexed around him, squeezing him tighter. “Maybe I should just stay like this.” He really thought he could. “The world makes so much more sense when I hold you this way.” He dragged the tips of his fangs along the top edge of the leather, the fresh blood welling to the surface of the shallow cuts. “Think we could last five days?” “You probably could…I can’t…you feel so good…” Jesse braced himself against the wall, his palms flat against the bricks. He could feel Jesse’s careful restraint as he waited for Gideon to move. Slowly, Gideon eased back, aware of every stretch of skin clutching at his cock as he attempted to slide out. The lack of lube had him feeling everything, the heat almost excruciating. He shuddered as it became too much, dropping his brow to Jesse’s shoulder when he pushed back in. 80

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He’d only managed a few inches. On the next thrust, he added another inch. Even that made him burn, inside and out. Each thrust was a slow smolder, and lines of heat raced beneath Gideon’s skin, through his veins. He was surrounded by sounds and smells and always Jesse’s warmth. Jess reached back, gripping Gideon’s hip, creating another point of contact. Each stroke brought forth a new chorus of whimpers and moans from Jesse’s throat, like he had never felt anything like that before in his life, and he might not feel anything like it again. Eventually, Jesse forgot the tight band of control he kept around himself and began to move with and against Gideon, creating more friction between them. It felt like it had been an eternity since Jesse had given himself so freely. The day Rae had come to do the tattoos had opened a door, but that had been largely circumstantial, fuelled by the feedback of having Emma in the room. She’d amplified their desire until it grew unbearable, something Jesse was particularly susceptible to. But here, it was just the two of them, just Gideon and Jess, like it had been in the beginning, like it had been the very first time Gideon had indulged his attraction. The understanding had him tightening his hold around Jesse, kissing along the scratches his fangs created, his hand stroking Jesse’s cock in counterpoint to his thrusts. “Need to see you come, Jess. Want to smell it. Taste it. Just let it go.” Jesse’s breath hitched, and his hammering pulse seemed to echo through Gideon’s body. As he slid his fist up Jesse’s length, he tensed, his ass tight enough to make Gideon growl. 81

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As he jerked his wrist back down, Jesse cried out, and then his entire frame shook. Hot come filled Gideon’s hand, shot over his fingers. Jesse leaned back, away from the wall, pushing himself onto Gideon’s cock completely. He dropped his head to Gideon’s shoulder, opening and closing his mouth with silent gasps. The heat was a welcome blanket, but the smell—the blood, the fight, the sweat, the sex—was what triggered Gideon’s climax more than anything else. His body jerked as he slammed one last time into Jesse’s ass, and he clamped his mouth over the cuts he’d already made, sucking and licking as he shot deep inside the quivering muscle. When his orgasm finally began to subside, Gideon lifted his hand to clean away the pearly fluid clinging to his fingers. Jesse turned his head at the last minute, and together, their tongues lapped at Gideon’s skin, touching and dancing against the other until it was all gone. Once Gideon’s fingers were clean, Jesse found his mouth in a pliant, searching kiss. Gideon responded, allowing the kiss to continue for several moments before releasing the belt around Jesse’s neck and easing away from him. Jesse’s eyes were still dark, and he offered a small smile. When he spoke, his voice was a little hoarse. “I think we’re pretty good in alleys.” “Pretty good?” Gideon pretended to scowl. “Clearly, if that’s the best description you can come up with, I didn’t fuck you nearly as hard as I should have.” “By pretty good I meant nothing that amazing could ever 82

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happen to me again…” Jesse pulled up his pants and refastened them, but didn’t bother to thread the belt through the loops. “Until the next time you fuck me.” There was a small drop of come lingering on Jesse’s chin. Unable to resist, Gideon grasped Jesse’s nape and pulled him close, dragging his tongue over the rough skin. “Well, we have killed the bad guys. That definitely merits an all-night celebration.” Jesse sighed. “That’s the least it merits. Maybe an all-day celebration as well?” All day would keep him away from the church, away from confronting most of the reason they were here in the first place. But Gideon wasn’t going to argue with Jesse, not when they’d made such good progress already. “All day,” he agreed. “Whatever my boy wants.”

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CHAPTER 7 When Jesse woke up, he felt normal. Sore. A little tired. Maybe even a bit weak because Gideon took his promise of celebration very seriously, but normal. Like he hadn’t felt in months. And the normal feeling stuck with him, all the way to the shower, where he was faced with the concrete evidence that in many ways, he’d never be back to normal again. Still, even the scars couldn’t completely ruin his mood. Gideon was still asleep when Jesse stepped out of the bathroom, a towel hitched around his hips. He stirred a bit as the steam rushed out of the open door, carrying with it the smell of soap and Jesse’s skin, but then he turned over on his stomach and settled again. It would be so easy to toss aside his 84

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towel and crawl back into bed with him. Gideon had promised him all day. Jesse had things he needed to do, but no pressing appointments. The church would still be there later that night, or the next day. They had plenty of time. Jesse took a shuffling step toward the bed, but stopped. Emma and Michelle had trusted him to take advantage of this opportunity, to make himself better, if he could. He owed it to them—if not himself—to go to the church. If Marcus Brooker was there, Jesse didn’t have to talk to him. Jesse didn’t even have to acknowledge him. Maybe it would be enough to simply see that Marcus had once been a thoughtful man of God, and in this world, he would continue to be. Jesse was forced to wear his dirty clothes from the night before. All the spare clothes Gideon had were too big for him. Gideon was larger than him anyway, but in the past, he could generally get away with wearing a shirt, or even a pair of pants with a tight enough belt. Now he had lost too much weight. His already skinny frame was nearly gaunt. As he moved through Gideon’s tiny apartment, he couldn’t help but wonder about the good they were accomplishing—or the harm they’d done. Mary would live. The Gideon in this world wouldn’t have to lose her. But was that necessarily for the best? Gideon stopped hunting humans completely because of the way he lost Mary. Gideon devoted his life to fighting for Chicago because of his loss. And, of course, the Jesse in this dimension might not ever get the chance to meet, much less fall in love with, Gideon. Where would that leave him? Jesse tried to imagine what his 85

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life would have been like if he had never met Gideon, and the picture his imagination painted wasn’t a pleasant one. It wasn’t horrible, Jesse supposed. It might have even been a better life than most people ever had. He wouldn’t have stayed in Chicago for very long. He probably would have gone back to England, back to his father’s huge, empty house. There would have been books. More books than any one person could ever hope to get through in a lifetime. Maybe he would have married, eventually. Not because he ever really wanted to get married, but because it would have been a good way to break the monotony of his days. At least for a little while. Jesse shook his head. Or maybe he would have moved to Russia and searched for the Yeti. There really was no way of knowing. Still, he couldn’t help but feel a little bit sorry for the future he might have unwittingly condemned his counterpart to. He debated waking Gideon, but ultimately, let him a short note. Going to the store, Michelle’s, and the church. Be back before dusk. He doubted Gideon would even see the note. He’d probably simply sleep until Jesse returned—after the night and morning they had, Jesse wouldn’t blame him. This Chicago in the harsh light of day wasn’t too different from his Chicago. Except for the unfamiliar buildings and storefronts. And the cars. And the people. If Jesse understood dimensional theory correctly—and he acknowledged he could be mistaken—dimensions were stacked up on top of each other, like pancakes. One point in any dimension would 86

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coordinate to the same point in all other dimensions—in time and space. That must mean Michelle not only had the ability to open doors between dimensional walls, she could also send people through time. Did that mean she could time travel in their dimension? Jesse thought it probably did. So why go through all the extra effort of dimension hopping? Why not just go back in time and fix everything? He could sure live without the physical, mental, and emotional scars. But Jesse saw the slippery slope he was creating. How far back would Michelle go to fix everything? Would she just stop their trip to New York? But then Marcus would still be torturing and killing people. That would never do. So would she go back to save Mary? But then Gideon would be an entirely different person. Why not go further back than that and stake Gideon? Or stop Gideon from ever being turned into a vampire? The more he thought about it, the more it hurt his head. Clearly time travel, while possible, was not a tenable solution. He was still mulling it when he reached Michelle’s shop. He recognized it immediately because it looked exactly the same. Michelle looked exactly the same, too. And she, apparently, knew him. “I was expecting you last night.” Jesse blinked and stopped short. Everything in the shop was exactly the same. Even the books he had reshelved himself two weeks ago when Michelle had put him to work— the cost of her advice. He had moved several reference books from the back of the shop to the front as per her request and 87

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stacked them by theme, not by author. “Think of this shop as a sort of axis. And you’re late.” “I’m sorry.” Jesse stepped closer and saw that Michelle wasn’t exactly the same. Not quite. Her hair was different, and her face was marked. Nothing so superficial as a scar. It was more like the way she held her expression. “Didn’t she tell you to come here?” “Yes, but Gideon…” The frown on Michelle’s face deepened. “Yeah, that’s what I thought. He ignored her instructions.” Jesse thought of protesting, offering some sort of defense, but ultimately Michelle was right. Gideon had ignored the instructions. “Don’t let him do that again. Or else you’re going to be stuck here permanently.” “I understand.” “What makes you think you belong here?” Jesse knew she meant her dimension, not her store. “I don’t think that. I know I don’t belong here. But I trust Michelle…you…and she thought this was for the best.” Michelle moved from behind the counter, her feet falling ominously against the wood floor. Jesse remained still as she approached him. When she got close enough, he realized she smelled the same. Dust, old leather, something sweeter, like sugar cookies, and whiskey. “What makes you so special, Jesse Madding?” He swallowed. “I guess I’m not so special. But I am her friend, and if she needed my help, I’d do anything in my 88

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power for her.” Jesse expected the glare to continue, but Michelle smiled. It shifted her face, made her even more familiar. “This business about shifting through dimensions…it isn’t done. And it takes a lot of energy. Don’t make her look for you when the time comes to go home.” “I won’t,” Jesse promised solemnly. “Do you need anything? You look awful.” She narrowed her eyes and studied him. “Did somebody try to kill you?” “What?” Jesse self-consciously touched his throat and remembered his skin was still a bit red from the leather. “No. No, nothing like that. And I don’t need anything. I was just on my way to buy some new clothes.” Michelle didn’t seem satisfied with his answers, but she nodded anyway. “If you do need anything, you know where to find me. I’m always here.” “I know.” Her smile returned. “I guess some things don’t change, huh?” “No, I guess they don’t. Look, I’m going to have a bit of free time this week. We’ve still got nearly five whole days. I could come by and…” “You want to fondle my books, don’t you?” Jesse grinned. “Please.” “Sure. Just don’t bring that vampire with you.” “I wouldn’t dream of it.” “Your Michelle doesn’t let him in the store either, I take it?” 89

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“My Gideon doesn’t want to be within twenty feet of my Michelle…” “Did she show you the porn?” “Not all of it.” Michelle winked. “Maybe we should fix that.” Jesse opened his mouth to agree, but he was cut off by the bell over the door. He didn’t recognize the new customers, but he could tell at a glance that they weren’t human, and they were there with a specific goal in mind. Michelle squeezed his arm gently and then crossed the room to intercept them. Jess watched for a few moments before slipping out. He turned north, the direction of the church. It might have been easier and faster to just take a cab, but Jesse appreciated the walk. It gave him time to think, though he had been thinking much too much lately. A line from a poem flashed into his mind—he needed time to prepare a face to meet the faces he would meet. He was standing in front of the church much sooner than he expected. Was it still standing in his world, in his dimension? Or had it been knocked down to make room for the mega-churches that seemed to be popping up everywhere? Jesse couldn’t even guess. He wasn’t a very religious man. Hoping that the door would be locked—though not knowing why a church would be locked at all—he marched up the steps. But the knob turned easily in his hand, and he slipped out of the noon sun and into the church’s cool recesses, the door shutting softly behind him. At first, he thought he was alone, but as his eyes began to adjust, he saw 90

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the figure of a woman standing near the altar. Though her back was to him and he’d only had the picture in his possession for a few days, Jesse would have recognized Mary Straughn anywhere. She haunted his nightmares, the specter of everything that had gone wrong and everything that could have been. The sole reason he had the life he had. But the picture hadn’t prepared him for how dark and smooth her skin really was, or the fact that she was nearly as tall as him, or how penetrating her eyes were when she glanced back to notice him, frozen in the entry. “Hello. Can I help you with something?” “No…I…I was just…” He hadn’t been prepared to meet her now, and his brain refused to supply any sort of adequate response. He didn’t know if he wanted to hate her or love her. Somehow, the thought of hating her seemed blasphemous. “I didn’t mean to…bother you.” Something in her face softened, but it didn’t lessen the force of her gaze. “I’ll only be bothered if I scare you off.” She stepped down into the aisle, her hand outstretched. “I’m Mary.” Jesse took her hand politely, and was immediately struck by the warmth of her smooth skin, the firmness of her grip. He knew he needed to pull himself together and begin behaving like a civilized person, but all he could think was I’m shaking hands with a dead woman. But she wasn’t dead. And she wouldn’t be. At least, not that night. “I’m Jesse.” Suddenly, the details of the cover story he 91

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planned to tell came back to him. “I’m new to town, and I’m looking for a new church. A few friends suggested I come here.” A smile curved her wide mouth. He wouldn’t have thought it possible, but it made her even more arresting. It reflected sincerity and intelligence, an even better welcome than her greeting. “It’s good to know the word is spreading,” she said. “I’m probably biased, but I don’t think you’ll find a better place to call home than right here.” Jesse looked around the building for the first time. It was smaller than he expected. He imagined the pews full of people, tried to imagine Gideon shouldering his way in and terrorizing them just because he could. “It looks like a fine place to call home. When is the next meeting?” “Tonight. Who’re your friends? Maybe I know them.” “Michelle.” It was the only name that occurred to him, though he wasn’t even sure Mary would know her. “Michelle. She owns a bookstore.” But Mary nodded, like Michelle referred people to her church every day of the week. “Meetings usually start at seven, but if you’d rather not have to come after sunset, Pastor Brooker always opens the doors early. He’s here, if you’d like to meet him.” Before Jesse could stop her, Mary turned and called for him, her voice filling the small space. Before the other man even stepped into the room, Jesse knew he couldn’t deal with this. He wished Emma were there. 92

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He wanted Gideon. Brooker’s not the same. He’s not the same man. And he believed that. He believed the man who acted as pastor in this church wouldn’t harm him. But the past six months hadn’t been dictated by logic, by what he believed. The past six months had been dictated by the physical memory of violation. A memory that seeped into flesh and went to his bones. Marcus stepped out of the rectory, smiling pleasantly. But it was the same face. And Marcus had smiled at him often. Why shouldn’t he? He had thoroughly enjoyed every second of the torture. Everything went cold. The greeting died on Brooker’s lips as concern darkened his tawny eyes. His gaze flickered to Mary, who turned back to see the perspiration beading on Jesse’s forehead, the way all the color had suddenly leeched from his skin. “Are you all right?” she asked. She stepped forward and took his arm without waiting for an answer, her grip surprisingly strong as she guided him into a pew. “Put your head between your knees. You look like you’re going to be sick.” He was going to be sick. Please, no, not here. Not here. Please. But his silent prayer evaporated as the first wave of images crashed over him. red toolbox darkness red blood whip knife red in his eyes 93

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red on Marcus’s shirt on the back of his shirt how did it get there red dripping down his thighs. But it was the pain tearing through him that made him whimper. Pain slicing down his back and through his stomach. He clenched his hands into tight fists and squeezed his eyes shut, assaulted again and again. Something warm and delicate laid across his shoulders. His first instinct was to lash out, force the contact away. Can’t hold me. Gideon will come. But joining the soft touch was an even softer voice, words whispered that were meant to soothe. Behind them, he heard the vague sound of doors and footsteps, but always the voice, there, not to be ignored. “It’s all right. You’ve come to the right place. This is what we do, we’ll take care of you, make sure everything is all right. Just have faith, Jesse. That’s all you need. Have faith, and He’ll take care of all of us. He promised. Remember that. He promised. And He always keeps His Word.” She was talking about God, but he thought of Gideon. He couldn’t force the waking nightmare to stop, but the words did filter through the gray layers and shifted the scene. There was still blood, but it wasn’t his. And the soft touch belonged to another gentle hand. He hadn’t been left alone. He wouldn’t be left alone. When he finally opened his eyes, it wasn’t dark. He kept his gaze locked on the floor, terrified if he looked up, he’d see Brooker again. He was shaking so hard, his teeth chattered. Mary kept holding him, kept talking to him, and God, no wonder she haunted Gideon. 94

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“I need to go home,” he finally said, when the tremors subsided. “Are you sure? Is there somebody there who can take care of you?” “He’s not in any shape to drive, Mary.” This was a new voice, male. Most importantly, it wasn’t Brooker. It came from somewhere above, maybe behind him. Mary shifted, though her arm didn’t move from Jesse’s shoulders. “I can see that, Hal,” she hissed. “I think he’s in shock.” “He’s been attacked. Look at him.” “I did.” “We should take him to Gideon’s.” Jesse opened his mouth to say yes, yes, please. I need Gideon. But at the last second, he realized he couldn’t say that. They wouldn’t take him to the right vampire. “No. No, I need to go home. There’s somebody waiting for me. Please.” He looked up and tried to smile reassuringly, but the smile felt stiff and plastic. “I can make it back on my own.” Mary’s brows were drawn together into a line, her mouth almost as tight. She regarded him so intently, Jesse wondered if she could see straight through each and every one of his lies. “We’ll take you home,” she announced. Her tone gave no room for argument. “Did you drive? Because Hal’s right. You’re in no shape to do it yourself.” “No, I walked.” He finally focused on Hal’s face and experienced a small moment of vertigo. The man looked just 95

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like his son, and Jesse’s friend, Derek. He considered protesting again, but that might make him look more insane than he already did. “Can you just take me to…Marius’s diner?” The request seemed to take Mary a little by surprise, and it dawned on Jesse too late that since the diner wasn’t anywhere near the apartment Gideon used most of his time, there was no reason he should logically assume she’d know what he was talking about if he was a total stranger. He kept his neutral mask on, however, years of practice kicking in. “We can do that,” she said. “Hal, help me out here.” “I don’t need…” They lifted him to his feet with practiced ease, and he wondered how many times the two of them helped people find their feet. Once he was standing, he realized he did need their support. His muscles were still watery. If he wasn’t still vibrating with phantom pains, he might have been embarrassed. “Where’s Marcus?” Hal gestured toward the rectory door. “The phone rang. Did you want to talk to him before we left?” “No. No, never mind.” He glanced at Mary and noticed she was still studying him with an intent frown. It wasn’t unlike the way Gideon stared at a problem he couldn’t figure out. As soon as the thought occurred to Jesse, he tried to distance himself from it. He didn’t need to be thinking about Mary and Gideon in the same context. They made it out to Hal’s car without further trouble, and Jesse murmured his thanks as they helped him into the back 96

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seat. The last thing he expected was for Mary to slide in next to him. “I know you’re scared by something,” she said as Hal turned on the engine. “But if you let me, I can help you. You just have to be honest with me.” Jesse didn’t know if he wanted to laugh or cry at that. He found her presence to be soothing and infuriating at the same time. He just wanted to be left alone. He just wanted to go back to Gideon. But there was no denying the way she brought everything to focus. “Thank you. I appreciate that. But…well, it’s complicated. I don’t really feel comfortable talking about it.” She regarded him in silence for several blocks. Jesse couldn’t help but wonder if Gideon had picked up the habit from her or the other way around. Or if they’d both had it and it was just a matter of discovering… He forced his mind to stop traveling that path. It helped that she finally spoke up again. “It’s not good to keep it all inside. Fear is a parasite that eats you alive if you let it. And what’s the point of letting it win to hurt somebody else if you can put a stop to it?” This time, when he smiled, it didn’t seem quite so fake. “I don’t think it’s going to win. Not this time, anyway.” He paused, trying to think of a way to draw her scrutiny from him. “I don’t suppose you see a lot of strangers have breakdowns in your church.” Some of her frown eased, though it didn’t disappear 97

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entirely. “I think you’d be surprised by what I’ve seen.” Any other time, Jesse might have asked out of pure curiosity. But now he didn’t want to hear any more horror stories. “No, unfortunately, I probably wouldn’t be. But it looks like you’ve got good support.” He glanced to Hal, who didn’t seem to be reacting to their conversation at all. “Chicago’s the kind of town where you need as many friends as you can get.” Mary tilted her head, her gaze falling to the chafing at his neck. “This person waiting for you. Is this somebody you trust enough to talk to?” “Yes.” Jesse could see the questioning doubt in her eyes, and couldn’t help but smile again. How many times had he defended Gideon to curious and concerned people? “I trust him completely.” He touched his throat. “This isn’t what you think.” “Really? Because I think you’ve been bitten by a vampire.” “Well, yes, I have.” He reached over, hooking his fingers over her collar and pulling it down slightly. Jesus Christ. “So have you.” Her reflexes were swift. She knocked his hand away with a sharp force and a keen angle he more than recognized. Gideon had taught her well. “That’s none of your business,” Mary said tightly. If she noticed Hal’s glance at them in the rearview mirror, she didn’t acknowledge it. “I’m sorry.” He meant it, too. “You’re right. It’s not any of my business. But I think my point still stands. I have been 98

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attacked recently. But…it wasn’t a vampire. And he’s…well, he’s dead now.” She looked like she didn’t want to believe him. But after a few more blocks of silence and that discerning regard, she finally took a deep breath and relaxed against the seat. “I’m sorry. I worry too much sometimes.” Reaching across the distance between them, she rested a long, slim hand on his forearm. “Just promise me you’ll talk to your friend. Or bring him to church tonight. There’s nothing wrong in sharing the load with those who are used to the burden.” A part of Jesse wished he could at least go back to the church by himself. But he didn’t know if he could stand to see Marcus Brooker again. If just the sight of him was enough to give Jesse an attack, how could he stand to ever talk to him? Gideon had been in a very indulgent mood. Maybe he would agree to stay in bed for the next four days. “I don’t know if I can,” Jesse said, trying to be as honest with her as possible. “I…well, I want to. But…maybe I’m not as ready to go out in public as I thought I was.” “But is hiding really all that much better?” “I don’t know.” He knew he was supposed to say no, hiding wasn’t better. But at the moment, he didn’t believe it. “I think my friend will agree with you. If he does…then I’ll probably be back soon. Maybe not tonight.” The car came to a stop outside of the diner, and Jesse reached for the door handle. “Thank you for the lift.” Her soft voice stopped him. “I know how terrifying it is, Jesse. I’ve seen it. But I’ve 99

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seen things change, too. I know it’s possible, and I believe with everything that I am, you can take the steps you need to. If that’s what you really want.” “It is.” Jesse paused, wishing he could add more, but not knowing what to say. She seemed to understand, because she inclined her head—a slight nod. After a moment, he let himself out of the car and shuffled into the diner. He ordered a cup of coffee and waited until Hal’s car was long gone before slipping out the door and down the block. He didn’t take an easy breath until he was in the dark apartment. He waited at the door, listening for any sign of Gideon being awake. When he heard nothing, he turned on the kitchen light, and the small yellow bulb in the narrow hallway. He didn’t bother to strip out of his dirty clothes before crawling into bed and resting his cheek on Gideon’s back, his arm going around the other man’s waist. After a few moments, he closed his eyes, but he didn’t sleep. *

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Somebody long and warm pressed into Gideon’s side, and he wrapped his arms more tightly around the person’s back, burrowing his nose until Jesse’s scent filled his waking senses. The comforting smell of blood and come drifted together, making his cock twitch. That’s right. They’d been celebrating. Mary’s killers were dead. She would survive. A small part of Gideon’s heart was finally at peace. As he inhaled the familiar smells, however, something else 100

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began to break through his half-wakened state. It had lingered in the air when he’d first come into the apartment, though he hadn’t said anything to Jesse at the time. A perfume, faint and musky, that clung to pores even in the heat of battle, or the throes of sex, or the quietude of church. Gideon stiffened as he pulled away. The abrupt shift made Jesse blink against the dim lighting in the bedroom, but seeing the sleepy blue eyes gaze up at him didn’t ease the knots that had formed in Gideon’s gut. “You’ve been out,” he said. Jesse ran his hand over his face, as if trying to wipe his dreams from his eyes. “Yeah. I went to see Michelle, and then I went to the church.” “You saw Mary.” He felt stupid saying the words aloud. Of course, Jesse had seen Mary. He had her scent all over him. “How is…is she all right?” “How…” He sat up, his back against the wall. “Oh, right. She’s fine. Great, as far as I could tell.” She’s fine. Great. Most importantly, she was alive, though the attack at the church that would have killed her wasn’t supposed to occur yet anyway. And now it wouldn’t. Because Gideon and Jesse had seen to that. All of a sudden, Gideon felt like celebrating all over again. He rose from the bed, too awake now to remain confined. “Did she see you? Did you talk to her? Hal was probably there. He always hung around the church when Mary was there…” Gideon stopped in his pacing as it clicked where exactly Jesse had been. His next question was far more 101

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careful. “Did you see Brooker?” “Yes, I saw her. I didn’t expect to, but she was there and invited me to come in. Asked me a few questions about myself. Which I wasn’t prepared to answer. Hal was there, too. Derek could be his clone, couldn’t he?” Gideon didn’t respond, waiting for Jesse to answer his question first. The silence lasted for several beats before Jesse looked away and said softly, “Yeah, I saw Brooker. For about five seconds before I had a…flashback.” Any momentary excitement he’d had about Mary fled. His instinct was to go to him, pull him into his arms and tell him it was all right, but the scent of her still in the air, mingling with Jesse’s, checked that impulse. It would be like holding Mary, and that was a fucked up thought, no matter how he looked at it. “But you made it back okay,” he said, hopefully. “That means it couldn’t have been that bad, right?” “Mary insisted Hal drive me home. I told them I’d be fine on my own, but she was very…adamant. They dropped me off at the diner.” “Yeah, that sounds like Mary, all right.” Now that he looked more closely at Jess, Gideon saw the rings beneath his eyes, the fresh chafing at his neck. Frankly, he was a little surprised Mary let him leave at all. She had always been an expert at spotting someone who needed help. “So…what happened?” He perched on the edge of the bed, unsure of what to do. This entire trip was supposed to be about Jesse facing his fears, giving him some of his power back. So 102

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far, all they’d done was satisfy a forty-year-old vendetta. “Do you want to talk about it?” Jesse snorted. “No. Not really. But I think…I probably should. Since I’ve never told you what they’re like.” He paused for so long, Gideon wondered if he did have any intention of talking about it. “I was talking to Mary and she called Marcus. He came out and he looked the same. Then he smiled at me and…I was there again. Mary made sure I sat down before I could fall down, and…it’s not a memory.” He touched his stomach absently. “It’s more like a vivid, Technicolor dream, complete with sensory details.” “Details.” He couldn’t stop watching Jesse’s hand, rubbing over the scars hidden by his shirt. “You mean, you feel it all again.” “Yeah. It’s a sort of phantom pain. I’m not really sure how to describe it.” Which brought Gideon right back to his original dilemma. When it came to helping Jesse, he’d been impotent from the beginning. He couldn’t love him better. He couldn’t mark him better. He couldn’t master him better. And he had no idea how to deal with pains that were only real in Jesse’s head. “Would a shower help?” He didn’t know what else to suggest, and frankly, the sooner he scrubbed the scent of Mary off Jesse’s skin, the easier Gideon was going to feel. “Though I guess this means you didn’t get any new clothes.” Jesse smiled, and the expression reached his eyes. He swung his legs over the side of the bed and stood up, pulling his shirt over his head as he straightened. “I hope you’re 103

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asking if a shower with you would help.” He tossed the shirt aside. “I didn’t get any new clothes, but I’m not too worried about it. I don’t plan on going out again any time soon.” Gideon was halfway to the bathroom when Jesse’s last statement stopped him. “You’re going back to the church,” he said. “That was the whole point of coming in the first place.” “Well, not the whole point. We killed the vampires, and saved Mary, and…I can’t go by myself again. Seeing Marcus alone…I can’t do it.” “So you won’t go alone. I’ll go with you.” Though as soon as the words were out of his mouth, Gideon regretted them. “You need to see that you’ve saved this Brooker. That’s what Michelle said.” Jesse looked at him with petulant eyes, and Gideon thought he might be gearing up for a fight. But instead, he finished stripping and went into the small bathroom. “Then, yeah, we better go out tonight and find some decent clothes. I think Mary wanted to take me in like a stray puppy.” The comforts of the bathroom were far from what they had at home, but Gideon knew from experience that the narrow tub was large enough for two. He followed Jesse in, hanging back while Jess tested the water. “Is there something I’m missing here? Because I get the distinct feeling you’re going to give me hell until we get back. One way or another.” “You’re not missing anything. I had two choices. The hospital or coming here. It’s not fair to drag you into a situation you don’t want to be in to begin with, just so I can 104

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change my mind.” Gideon hated the way that sounded. Two choices. An ultimatum. But wasn’t that what he’d given Jesse? Get better or else. Except that’s what Jesse wanted, too. Nobody wanted things to continue the way they had been. Nobody had been happy. Least of all, Jesse. He hung back until Jesse stepped into the tub. When Jess hesitated to pull the curtain shut, however, Gideon moved forward, easing in behind him. “Think of it this way. You’re saving me from Michelle. She’s going to read me the riot act as soon as she realizes I blew off her orders to come see her first.” Jesse stepped back, his body fitting against Gideon’s naturally. “Michelle…this dimension’s Michelle…already read me the riot act. She’s not happy, but she wasn’t terribly surprised. I guess she doesn’t like you much in this dimension either.” “We’d have to go back another sixty-odd years to find a dimension where she doesn’t.” Jesse tilted his head back, his eyes curious. “Why? What did you do sixty-odd years ago?” Reaching for the bar of soap, Gideon shrugged. “Some stupid ritual. Michelle’s always been a little twitchy about dimensional power.” “So you two have been nursing a grudge for the past one hundred years over some stupid ritual? I suspect there’s more to this story.” “She tried staking me. I think that’s worth a grudge.” 105

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“Really? I didn’t think you would hold that against her. You fell in love with the other person who tried staking you, after all.” Gideon snorted. “You’ve seen both of them. Can you blame me?” “Hmm.” Jesse pretended to consider for a moment before shaking his head. “No, I can’t say I do blame you. Mary is very…attractive, to put it mildly.” “Mary also never left me to hang upside down on a cross an hour before dawn. Big points in her favor.” “Well,” Jesse said slowly, “that explains an awful lot.” He turned around, water dripping down his hair and face. “You must have been thrilled when I first discovered her shop and spent all my free time there.” The corner of his mouth lifted. “There were a few days I worried you’d try sneaking in to stake me in my sleep. I just made sure I slept naked those times after you went to see her.” His smile widened. “Had to do what I could to distract you.” “Please. In those days, I never would have had the nerve to sneak into your bedroom while you were asleep. And if I did, it wouldn’t have been to stake you.” Jesse smiled wryly. “But I guess you knew that, or you wouldn’t have tried the sleeping naked tactic at all.” There was something achingly familiar about the bantering tone of Jesse’s voice, a reminder of times the way they used to be. Unbidden, Gideon leaned in, lips parted to brush a soft kiss across Jesse’s unsuspecting mouth. “Considering my track record, the odds of me falling in 106

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love with you if you’d tried to stake me were fifty/fifty,” he teased. “I’m almost surprised you didn’t take them.” “I might have, if I had been aware of the odds.” Jesse lightly ran his fingers over the scars on Gideon’s chest. “Of course, you might have become suspicious when I made it a point to miss your heart by staking you on the wrong side.” “As long as you didn’t try sticking the stake someplace a little more vital to me, I probably wouldn’t have minded.” Jesse chuckled. “You’re a strange vampire. And I’m glad I didn’t have to go those distances, because honestly, I might have been forced to do something that drastic.” Rolling the bar of soap between his wet hands, Gideon worked up a lather before setting it aside. “Because that whole mess with the obsidian wasn’t drastic at all,” he said, though he kept his tone light. He began working his hands over Jesse’s body, determined to show him through touch that he didn’t care about the latticework of scars that made Jess so self-conscious. “So we’ll wash up, hit some stores, and…then what?” Jesse looked down, watching Gideon’s hands as they moved over his skin. “Maybe we can go to the church tonight after the service. Mary kept inviting me. I told her I couldn’t…but we’ve only got four more nights. As much as I’d rather stay in bed, that’s probably not an option.” “I think we should go during the service. You need to see how he is with the congregation.” When he’d run into Brooker six months earlier, Gideon hadn’t remembered him. He had never paid that much attention to the peripheral characters in 107

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Mary’s life. But in the time since, he’d done nothing but dig up every memory he could find and try to understand what kind of man Brooker might have been that he could do this. “He’s a believer. He put everything he was into that church, those people, and Mary.” “I know. That’s the one thing…if he had just been evil it would have been one thing. If I could have just considered him in plain black and white terms, good and evil, right and wrong, it’d be easier. But he wasn’t like that. Insane, yes. But…” Jesse glanced up through his lashes, meeting Gideon’s eyes. “Are you going to be okay, going during the service?” No, probably not, but he wasn’t going to tell Jesse that. “I’ve been bracing myself for this ever since Michelle first suggested it to Emma,” he said instead. “It’s not going to get any easier, the longer I put it off.” “Yeah. I know.” Jesse’s brows furrowed. “Is…there any chance the other Gideon going to be there?” “There’s a chance. Not a good one.” He lowered his gaze, focusing on soaping Jesse up. “I wasn’t exactly a regular at the meetings. Most of her church was a little afraid of me. With good reason.” “Most people are a little afraid of you now. Though I guess it’s not the same, is it?” He was about to answer when the faint click of a door opening and closing captured his attention. Hands stilling in their task, Gideon turned his head toward the sound, peering through the translucent shower curtain as if he had X-ray vision and could see through the walls as well. He heard Jesse 108

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breathe in as if to speak and promptly waved him quiet. “Stay here,” he ordered. Rinsing his hands quickly, Gideon stepped out of the tub, grabbing the towel and wrapping it around his waist. His hand was on the doorknob when it turned in his grip, and he barely had time to step out of the way when it swung open. He froze when he met her eyes. So did Mary.

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CHAPTER 8 Jesse didn’t have time to grab the second towel, and once Mary was standing in the steamy bathroom, his body refused to cooperate. He stood under the cooling spray, soap and water sliding down his mangled body, and simply watched as Mary and Gideon regarded each other. It was Mary’s voice that finally broke his stupor, prompting him to turn off the faucet and cover himself. “What the hell is going on? Who are you?” Gideon held up his hands, palms out, as if in surrender. “Let me explain. It’s not what you think, Mary.” Mary laughed, but it lacked humor. “I don’t even know what to think. I can’t even…” Her voice faded as she looked 110

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over Gideon’s shoulder to Jesse. The towel around his hips didn’t hide the worst of his scars, and he automatically turned away from her. “Fine. Explain.” The look on Gideon’s face said that he’d clearly expected more of a fight. His mouth opened, but nothing came out. After several seconds, his hands dropped to his sides, and he turned back to Jesse. “Do I have to worry about any Back to the Future shit here? Michelle never made that clear.” Jesse shook his head. “No. If we did, this whole mission would be a failure from the start.” “What mission?” As she crossed her arms without moving from in front of the door, Jesse realized she didn’t intend to let them leave the room until they explained. Her eyes flashed, a hint that her patience wasn’t going to be infinite. Gideon’s gaze swiveled back to her. “The one where you and a lot of very good people don’t get killed. And since when do you have a key to this place? I could never talk you into taking one.” She ignored his question. “I can’t believe I’m actually going to say this, but…are you from the future?” “No,” Jesse said softly, finally stepping out of the narrow tub. “We’re from a parallel dimension. See, dimensions are stacked up like…” “Pancakes,” Mary provided without missing a beat. Jesse smiled. “Yeah, like pancakes. How did you know?” “Michelle told me about dimensions when I asked her why 111

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she staked Gideon.” Gideon grimaced. “She probably showed you the book of photographs, too, I’ll bet.” “She showed me the one with the two couples from around the turn of the century,” Jesse volunteered. Mary nodded. “Yeah, I saw that one. I also saw the one with the French contortionist.” “No, you didn’t,” Gideon said. “I burned that copy myself when Didiane and Germain came to town.” “Uh, yes, I did.” Mary looked at him like he was crazy. “I don’t know who Didiane and Germain are, but that was the first book Michelle tried to scare me off you with.” When he continued to frown at her, she added, “You don’t really want me to explain to Jesse how many different ways vines can be used to—” “Okay, you’ve seen it.” Except the lines in his brow still said the claim bothered him. Jesse didn’t know if he was more intrigued or disturbed by the exchange, but he did think he might visit Michelle if he got the chance. “Mary, we’ll be happy to tell you everything…why we’re here, what we’re doing, why I went to the church today.” Jesse gestured at his towel. “After we get dressed.” Her gaze went from Gideon to Jesse and back to Gideon. “Fine. I’ll wait in the kitchen.” “I have to say,” Jesse said, once she closed the door behind her, “this is the strangest situation I have ever been in.” “I suppose it doesn’t bode well if I say this ranks pretty 112

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high on the weird scale for me, too.” Pulling the towel off his waist, Gideon rubbed down his damp body. “I really did destroy that book.” “This dimension likely isn’t going to have one-to-one correspondence when it comes to the little details.” As Jesse dried himself, he found himself hoping Mary would be gone by the time they emerged from the bedroom. Why she would leave, he didn’t know. But it didn’t change the fact he wanted her gone. He left the bathroom first, and a quick glance at his clothes left on the floor confirmed he couldn’t wear them for a third time. They looked like they were about to get up and walk away on their own. By the time Gideon joined him, he was wearing a shirt that was at least three sizes too big, and pants cinched tight around his narrow hips. “Maybe we can talk Mary into running out and buying you some new things,” Gideon commented, going to the closet. “She always had a good eye.” The suggestion struck Jesse as vaguely inappropriate, but he merely nodded and offered a noncommittal, “Maybe.” He hovered near the door, watching as Gideon dressed. The other man’s face was impassive, his eyes expressionless. He desperately wanted to know what was going on in Gideon’s head, but he suspected it was something along the lines of oh my God, it’s Mary. He thought of going out to keep her company, at least, but nothing was going to make him leave that room before he absolutely had to. “She looks exactly the same.” Though he kept his eyes 113

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down, Gideon’s words were clearly meant for Jesse’s ears. “I don’t know what I expected, but…” He stopped, growling when he realized he’d misaligned the buttons on his shirt. “Fuck. I don’t know how you found the strength to go there today. I don’t think I would’ve left the apartment.” Jesse watched Gideon try and fail with the buttons for a second time before crossing to his side and pushing Gideon’s hands away. He rarely felt genuine rage toward Marcus Brooker, but when he did, it usually had something to with Gideon. Now the anger surfaced again. They didn’t deserve this shit. Gideon didn’t deserve it. “I guess we should just be thankful she gave you the chance to explain yourself and didn’t try to stake you again.” Gideon snorted. “We would have been fucked. I’m not sure I would’ve come out of the shock soon enough to stop her.” Jesse fastened the final, top button, and straightened Gideon’s collar. He noted in an absent way that Gideon’s shirt could have come from his wardrobe at home. Impeccably tailored, fitting his frame perfectly. If Gideon were paying attention, he’d probably be scandalized by the way his clothes were hanging off his own shapeless shoulders. “Don’t let anybody else catch you off guard,” Jesse said, trying to keep his voice light. “I don’t want to be stuck here by myself.” “You know, spending the next four days in bed is sounding better and better.” “That’s what I’ve been saying.” He smoothed his hands 114

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over Gideon’s shoulders, pushing the wrinkles out of the rich material. Unable to resist, he pressed a kiss against Gideon’s mouth, then stepped back. “We should probably get out there, or she might come barging in to see what’s keeping us.” “Might?” With a quirk of his lips, Gideon shook his head as he headed for the door. Gone was the fearful demeanor of just a few seconds previous. “The woman doesn’t know the meaning of holding back.” Jesse followed him out into the living room, painfully aware of how comfortable Mary appeared sitting in the corner of the couch. The smell of coffee drifted in from the kitchen, and there were two cups steaming on the coffee table. “I thought you could use it,” she said, her eyes steady on Jesse. “Thanks.” After a moment of hesitation, he chose to sit on the opposite end of the couch. He picked up the cup, cradling it in his cold fingers, and wished he had actually worked out with Gideon what they would tell her. “So…who are you?” She was still looking at Jesse. “People from another dimension, I get. But I don’t know you, and Gideon is different.” “Well, we aren’t from the same point on the timeline. We actually came from forty-three years in the future, too. Just not your future.” “Not anymore,” Gideon added. “You’re here to change the past? What was so wrong with it?” Jesse glanced at Gideon, but he was too busy holding the 115

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wall up, his eyes boring into Mary. “You died.” Jesse knew that diplomatic and Gideon were two words that would never fit together, no matter how hard he tried. Still, Jesse found Gideon’s bluntness oddly reassuring and familiar. “In our dimension,” Jesse added. “The details aren’t necessary. Trust me. But Gideon knew who was responsible, and…there were some specific consequences in our dimension. We hoped that by coming to this dimension, we could save…everybody here from those.” “What sort of consequences?” “Look at how many people follow you, Mary,” Gideon chastised. “Do you really need to ask that kind of question?” “But why would you come all the way to this dimension for them?” Mary asked. “You don’t really care about them now.” Jesse barely covered his wince. “One of them…blamed Gideon for what happened to you.” “Why? Gideon would never…” “I know. But he didn’t see it that way. He was looking for revenge, and I guess he found it in a way. We were hoping to stop him from ever going down that road.” Gideon folded his arms over his chest. “There is no ‘in a way’ about it.” His tone had gone fierce, and though he didn’t look away from Mary, Jess knew the words were meant for him, as well. “You saw Jesse in the shower. Because you died, and because it was my fault, someone who loved you carried 116

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around this hate for me, for over forty years. And he took it out on Jess. And I am not letting that happen again.” Mary turned her horrified gaze to Jesse. “Is that true?” “Yeah.” “And that…fit you had today? Is that related?” Jesse nodded. “A flashback. I don’t know what triggers them.” Which was partially true. Normally, he had no idea what would trigger one. “But it’s all taken care of now. We staked the vampires responsible last night.” “And it’s as simple as that?” Jesse didn’t know what to do in the face of the direct question. Clearly, it wasn’t as simple as that. If it were as simple as that, just having this discussion wouldn’t be so draining. “Are you going to go to every other dimension and save me?” Her shrewd eyes were focused on Gideon now. “I don’t think so. Why did you really come here?” She wasn’t the only one watching him. Jesse couldn’t tear his gaze away from the way the pain passed across Gideon’s face, or the way his shoulders squared just a little bit more. “Because losing you was the hardest thing that ever happened to me,” came his tight response. “I am not going to lose Jesse, too.” Now she focused on Jesse like she was getting ready to save him herself. “Are you in danger?” “No…” He set the cup of coffee down, surprised to find he was still holding it. “Yes. The past six months have been hard…between the flashbacks and everything. Michelle is my 117

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friend, and she thought it would be good for me, mentally and emotionally, if we made things right. That includes actually coming face to face with the person…” “Is that why you went to the church today?” “I just wanted to get a look at the place. I thought it would be empty.” Mary covered his hand and squeezed his fingers gently. “I’m so sorry that happened to you.” “Thank you.” “Though I guess that explains how you knew about the bite on my neck.” “He’s only started learning about you—the you in our dimension—since last fall.” At Mary’s quizzical frown, Gideon shrugged, averting his gaze. “I couldn’t talk about you. I kept saying…the past can’t be changed, so what’s the point?” He snorted, running a hand over his hair. “Except, apparently, it can for some people. You get to go on, helping everybody, changing the world. And now Jesse—the Jesse here—never has to suffer because of me.” “And he probably never gets the good parts of knowing you, either,” Jesse pointed out. “Or Emma. But I suppose he won’t know what he’s missing out on.” “But the point is…” Gideon was uncomfortable talking about that particular aspect of what they were doing. In spite of Jesse’s attempts to discuss it prior to their arrival, Gideon had been typically dismissive of what he considered unimportant. “…what’s going to help my Jesse is getting to see that things can be good here. Which means going to the 118

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church. Sitting in one of the meetings. That would be a lot easier if I didn’t have to worry about running into the other me. Can you help us with that?” Mary nodded. “That shouldn’t be a problem. In fact…” She checked her watch. “Oh, I need to call Marcus and tell him I’m running late.” Mary stood and crossed the apartment to the green phone in the kitchen. She dialed the number from memory. “Marcus? I’m going to be…on the other side of town, why? Are you…Oh my…I’ll be there.” Gideon straightened and Jesse stood, both of them immediately recognizing the signs of a person in distress. Her eyes were wide, but her face had hardened into a mask. “I have to go now.” “What is it?” Jesse asked. “What happened?” “It’s Gideon. He just showed up at the church…Marcus said it’s pretty bad.” “What do you mean, bad? I never went to the church when the others were there if I could help it. You made me promise.” Mary headed for the door, Gideon and Jesse on her heels. “And you don’t. Usually.” She stopped, her hand on the knob. “Marcus said he hasn’t seen that much blood since Mae and Missy Powers were killed.” At his side, Gideon stiffened. “Did you drive? Because we’re coming with you.” Jesse recognized the names. They had been murdered in the church by a gang of vampires. Gideon had helped Mary track down the culprits. 119

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“Yeah…” She took her keys out of her pocket, and Jesse noticed the slight tremor in her fingers. “Here.” He held out his hand for the keys. “Gideon can drive. He’s got a lead foot anyway.” Gideon snorted, though it was mostly put upon in light of the current dark mood. “Not in Mary’s car, I don’t. That clunker never went over forty. Now, my car…” He stopped. It took only a moment for Jesse to realize he’d seen Mary’s mouth tighten. None of them said another word until they were well on their way.

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CHAPTER 9 It was Jesse’s worst nightmare. Correction. Second worst. They had carried Gideon in from where he’d collapsed at the front door, stretching him out on the rearmost pew in order to tend to his injuries. All Mary and Jess had had to do to find him was follow the path of blood that led from the sidewalk, across the grass, over the threshold, and into the church. It wasn’t just a droplet here and there. There were wide swathes of scarlet with nearly continuous trails, splattered with even more blood. The scent was overwhelming by the time they stood at the end of the pew. Jesse was grateful Gideon was prowling along the perimeter of the property, staying out of sight but keeping an eye out for any intruders. 121

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The biggest band in the trail came from Gideon’s bare and mangled foot. He’d obviously dragged it along, bones shattered in his ankle, blood dripping down a calf muscle that looked like it had been scored with a rake. Oddly enough, his other shoe was still on, but questioning Gideon as to why he was half-shod was impossible. He was unconscious and had been ever since showing up. His clothes were torn, evidence of whatever struggle had caused all this, and Jesse watched Hal tear away the rest of the shirt to reveal deep bruising and gouges in the muscled chest. A crossbow bolt, broken off, was still buried in his right side, and his fingernails were crusted in blood and black, the knuckles torn and enflamed. The worst was his face. One eye was completely swollen shut, and his nose had been broken, drying blood ringing his nostrils. A vicious cut snaked along his throat and stopped over his Adam’s apple, like someone had attempted to decapitate Gideon and been thwarted in the process. And there were bruises, too many to count, with varying shades of bloom already masking his handsome features. Everything slowed to a crawl. The church was full of confused, surprised people, and they were all talking, straining for a look. But Jesse didn’t even notice them. Neither he nor Mary moved for a long second as they tried to take in the carnage in front of them. He’s not yours. He’s not your Gideon. But that didn’t matter. He barely understood his own logic. His. Mary’s. Nobody’s. It was still Gideon, mangled and twisted. The world began moving again, from a crawl to hyper122

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speed. As Jesse knelt by the pew, he wondered if this was how Gideon felt when they found him in Marcus’s torture chamber. Horrified, hollow, frightened, sick, angry. Overwhelmed. “We need to stop the bleeding,” Jesse said through numb lips. “Vampires can’t bleed to death but they…” He didn’t want to explain what would happen if a vampire lost too much blood, but he didn’t think Mary would ask for details. They would need to replace what he lost. He’d need to tell Gideon, his Gideon, to go to the butcher. His directive seemed to wake Mary up. She grabbed a young man nearly as tall as she was and issued orders Jesse barely heard. Something about emergency bandages and the rectory and a bottom drawer. The kid ran off as she turned to another, this time with instructions regarding finding the pastor. “We have to set his ankle. And get that arrow out of his side.” She turned to Jesse. “Have you ever had to operate on Gideon before?” Jesse almost smiled at the question. “It’s at the top of my job description.” The young man returned, and he heard Mary call him Paul. He saw Paul wanted to get away from the bleeding vampire— who now looked completely like a corpse—but he grabbed the boy before he could step away. “Here. Grab the bolt here at the bottom, close to the skin.” Paul tried to pull away again, but Jesse didn’t let him. “Take it. On three, we’re going to pull it out.” Gideon’s flesh made a squelching noise as it gave up the 123

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broken bolt. Behind him, Hal winced when it audibly scraped against bone. “Probably a good thing he’s out cold,” Hal murmured. “I’ve never seen him look this bad before.” “Neither have I,” Jesse said absently. Mary caught his eye and shook her head, and Jesse quickly added, “I’ve never seen anybody like this before.” A white bandage was folded over the new hole in Gideon’s side to smother the slow trickle of blood. “Do you have thread?” Mary turned away to start quizzing the women, and out of the corner of his eye, Jesse saw a half dozen start digging through their purses for portable sewing kits. He tore the leg off Gideon’s pants, exposing the ravaged calf, but before he could do anything, Hal stiffened at his side. “I guess I spoke too soon.” Jesse looked up in time to see Gideon’s lips part, his tongue come out, as if in slow motion, to swipe away some of the blood. Dark lashes flickered, then the one eye that wasn’t swollen shut slowly opened. Gideon frowned. Well, it would have been a frown if his face wasn’t so marred. “I thought they painted the ceiling last summer,” he croaked. Mary immediately moved to cradle his head, gently wiping the blood from his mouth and nose with a fresh bandage, unmindful of the stains on her shirt. Everything she did exposed a sort of raw tenderness Jesse had rarely seen. Gideon’s eye closed, and his face wasn’t so bruised and swollen that Jesse couldn’t recognize the look of relief. 124

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Somebody thrust a sewing kit in Jesse’s face, and he tore his gaze away from Mary. The smell of blood was thick enough to make his eyes water, and Gideon’s leg swam out of focus. Blinking rapidly, he cleared his vision and threaded the needle. “I don’t know how much this’ll hurt him,” Jesse murmured. “Try to keep him still.” The first stitch drew a hiss from Gideon, but it was followed almost immediately by the soft cadences of Mary’s voice, her words unintelligible as she soothed him. Jesse didn’t want to know what she said anyway. He had known it would be hard seeing them together, but seeing Mary usurping what had always been his position stung even more. He worked on autopilot, trying to keep his stitches even to minimize scarring. More than once, the irony that this Gideon just might bear as many scars as Jesse did flitted through his thoughts, but he ignored the ache it left in its wake. He had a job to do. He wouldn’t let Gideon down, even if he wasn’t his. A shadow fell across Gideon’s feet, and dark hands cradled the smashed one as they started to clean away the blood. “Tear off long strips of tape,” he heard Brooker say. Jesse glanced up in time to see Marcus toss his bloody rag into a growing pile on the floor before taking a makeshift splint from an older woman who crouched next to him. “We have to make this as immobile as possible.” Jesse finished guiding the needle through Gideon’s skin, pulling the thread tight before tying it off. Without missing a beat, he moved to the end of the pew and held the splint. 125

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“I’ll keep it in place. You tape.” Marcus nodded. “Jesse, right?” “Yeah.” “Glad you were here to help,” Marcus said as began wrapping tape around the splint. “Tighter. Don’t worry about hurting him.” Though he glanced up at him, Marcus did as he was told, winding the tape around and around until Jesse had to move his fingers out of the way. “It is a shame that your first meeting was under these circumstances,” he said in a low voice. “We’re normally much more peaceful.” Jesse focused on Marcus’s face for the first time, waiting for the swell of panic, for the ice to fill his veins. But he didn’t even feel a twinge. He still wasn’t eager to talk to the man. “Yeah. I know.” He sat back on his heels and surveyed their work. The blood had stopped flowing, and now, thanks to Mary, Gideon’s face was clean. The bruises were still stark and somber, and Jesse found himself wishing he had brought some of his cream. Though he knew he could make more. He would need to get some supplies from Michelle or Black John. “Do you have a safe place for him to stay?” “He’ll come home with me,” Mary said without hesitating. “No.” Gideon’s hand twitched at his side. He swallowed, grimacing in pain. “Not safe.” “And your apartment is? I don’t think so.” Hal intervened before Gideon could continue the argument. “What are we even protecting him from?” He 126

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looked at Gideon. “Who did this?” Gideon closed his eye again. “Vamps.” Mary glared at him, triumphant. “Even more reason for you to come back to my place. They can’t come waltzing in uninvited.” “No, they can just burn your building down, remember, Mary?” “I’m not going to let them get another shot at you. You’re going to be staying with me.” Jesse waited for Gideon to protest again, but Mary clearly won the round, because Gideon merely nodded. “Make sure there aren’t any broken bones we’re missing,” Jesse instructed, pushing himself to his feet. “Mary?” He nodded toward the empty doorway. Mary looked like she didn’t want to move, but after a moment, she stood as well, and followed him away from the crowd. “I think the only way we’re going to be able to move him is with Gideon’s help. You’ll need to clear everybody out of here. Hal and Marcus, too, if you don’t want them to know. Maybe you can send them to go buy blood while we move him?” She nodded. “I’ve got some that we keep for emergencies, but I’ll need to stock up.” Her focus drifted over his shoulder, watching the triage, as if she would miss something if she looked away. “This has never happened before,” she said in an even lower voice. “I’ve never known anybody to get the drop on Gideon, let alone leave him like this. And it’s vampires? They’re terrified of him. Why would they risk making him 127

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angry?” “Because they didn’t see it as a risk. Whoever wants him dead planned it so they could get away with it.” Jesse shook his head. “Gideon was wrong all these years. The three vamps we killed last night were just minions. Ma…” Marcus knew it. Jesse stopped himself before uttering Brooker’s name, but his voice was still vivid in his memory. He let those monsters get to her, when all they wanted was him. “I’ll go tell Gideon we’re going to need his help.” “Give me ten minutes to get rid of everybody. When you see me close the front door, bring Gideon in from the back.” She rushed off, clearly relieved to have something proactive to do, even if she was still confused. Jesse left the church with her commanding voice floating from behind him. He found Gideon near the sidewalk, toward the far corner of the property. “Well?” Gideon demanded. “What’s going on?” Jesse didn’t want to answer Gideon. He wanted to push him to the ground and cover him with his hands, and his mouth, and his eyes, until the sick feeling low in his gut finally went away. “He’s really injured. He must have been jumped by a whole gang. Nearly decapitated. Smashed foot…covered in bruises. Mary insisted we take him to her apartment.” Gideon opened his mouth, and Jesse realized he did not want to hear the same protest coming from his lips. “I know what you’re going to say. It’s already been decided. Gideon…it wasn’t a random attack.” 128

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Gideon froze. “What do you mean? We already got rid of the vamps who targeted me in our dimension. What the hell is so different in this one?” “No, Gideon.” Jesse hesitated, knowing Gideon wouldn’t like what he had to say. “The difference in this dimension is last night we killed three minions. That’s all they were. And whoever they worked for apparently didn’t appreciate the gesture. There’s still somebody out there looking for you…him…whichever. We’re not done here.” He didn’t speak. His head swiveled to stare at the church, his face hidden by the long shadows cast by the building. “So she’s still in danger,” he finally said. “We haven’t done a fucking thing.” Jesse curled his hands into fists to keep from grabbing Gideon and shaking him. “She’s not in danger. Not any more danger than anybody else around you…him. Fuck…” Jesse knew he needed to figure out a way to keep the two vampires separate, because all he could think was Gideon is in danger. “She was never the target. She’s not now.” “She is if she takes me in.” “She’s not…” Jesse blinked. “Don’t do that, Gideon. This is hard enough without you referring to him that way.” “What?” Gideon looked at him for a long moment before stiffening as if snapping out of a spell. “Oh. Right. Sorry. I’m just…I don’t…” With a frustrated snarl, he ran his hand over his hair, whirling away to start pacing the length of the walk again. “Mary understands the risks,” Jesse said, watching him 129

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without moving. “She knows what’s she’s doing by bringing him home. And do you honestly think anybody could talk her out of it? I’d do the same, and I wouldn’t think twice.” “That only means you’re both insane,” Gideon muttered. He startled Jess by twisting back to stand in front of him. “How do you know it wasn’t random? How do you know I didn’t just piss somebody off? I’m good at that, you know. And I used to be even better.” “Because nobody gets the drop on you. Because they were armed with knives and crossbows and maybe a rake. Because somebody got close enough to slit his throat and cut a good chunk out of his leg. You get one look at him and tell me he didn’t step into a trap. Because three random vampires you don’t know from Adam wouldn’t decide to attack a church full of humans and target the one who matters to you on a whim.” The litany of injuries wiped any fury from Gideon’s face, but it was Jesse’s last argument that turned his dark eyes bleak. “So what am I supposed to do? I was supposed to save her. That was supposed to make a difference.” “So we save him.” You. “We shift our attention, that’s all. We figure out who was behind tonight’s attack and we find him and we stop him before he has time to set another trap. That’s how we make this right.” Gideon’s gaze was unwavering. “Are you up for that? Honestly, Jess?” “Yes.” The response came without hesitation. “It doesn’t matter what dimension we’re in, Gideon. It doesn’t matter that 130

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I don’t really know the vampire currently bleeding all over the church floor. This…” He gestured at his bloodstained clothes with a bloodstained hand, “is what I do.” “No.” Gideon closed the distance between them, clasping a large hand to the back of Jesse’s neck and pulling him close so their brows touched. “This is what we do.” Jesse smiled, and once again, he wanted to push Gideon to the ground and forget about everything else but him. Except, he heard the resounding thud of the church’s door closing, and he knew Mary would be waiting for them. “It is. And right now, what we need to do is help Mary get settled. She emptied the church, so you don’t have to worry about anybody seeing you.” Gideon nodded and released him. They turned toward the church, and Jesse knew that as soon as they took care of the injured Gideon, they would start their search. Any other time it might have been daunting to start that sort of search without even so much as a lead. But whatever twinge of hesitation Jesse might have had departed as soon as he saw the vampire on the pew. Somehow, it was worse now, even with all the blood cleaned away. Jesse took Gideon’s hand and squeezed it once before they set to work.

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CHAPTER 10 They beat dawn by about ten minutes. Jesse didn’t like cutting it that close. Gideon barely even noticed. He began to pace once Jesse closed the door behind them, as though affronted that the sun had the audacity to rise while he was working. They were both wired, but for different reasons. Gideon wanted to get back out and start looking again for a lead, any lead, even one that wasn’t promising. Jesse couldn’t stop thinking about the scene they had left at Mary’s tidy apartment. Gideon had been stretched out on Mary’s bed, and looked quite happy to be there, despite his injuries. Mary was heating blood on the stovetop, like it was something she had done a 132

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thousand times before. Jesse had never heated blood on the stove, and he wondered if blood did the same thing milk did if you let it boil for too long. Gideon had looked awful. It didn’t matter how much they cleaned him. It didn’t matter how much they bandaged him. Mary helped him into a clean shirt and a pair of sweats, covering up the worst of the bruises, and that didn’t even make a difference. Jesse thought he would stop feeling so sick with some time and distance. But it had been hours since they left Mary’s home, and he didn’t feel better. His Gideon was within touching distance, and he didn’t feel better. He watched the vampire pace for a few more seconds before stepping into his path. Gideon stopped short, his brow knitted in a confused frown. Jesse didn’t try to explain himself. He folded his fingers in Gideon’s shirt and claimed his mouth in a hungry, vaguely desperate, kiss. There was a moment of hesitation, of uncertainty when he was terrified Gideon was going to push him away. The mouth he loved didn’t respond, and the hands he adored didn’t reach out. He couldn’t even blame him if he didn’t. There were other things to worry about, and both needed their sleep, and… There it was. Lips parting. Tongue coaxing Jesse’s to slow as they tangled. A broad hand at the back of his head, as if there was any question in the world that he would ever want to pull away. Jesse relaxed into the kiss, seeking out the familiar curves and recesses of Gideon’s mouth. The pressure of his lips, the slide of his tongue, the taste of his skin, the strength of his 133

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hand, the hard muscles of his body soothed the ache in Jesse’s chest. He hoped Gideon understood. The way he responded to the kiss told Jesse he did. Without breaking away, Jesse covered Gideon’s body with his hands. He fumbled with the buttons he had fastened himself earlier that night, seeking out Gideon’s smooth, unmarred skin. The more he touched, the more he wanted. “Hey,” Gideon chuckled. “Slow down there. We’re stuck in here all day.” “I know…it’s just…” Jesse trailed his mouth down Gideon’s jaw to his neck before resting his brow on Gideon’s shoulder. “Seeing him, like that…it was like the embodiment of my worst nightmares.” Gideon smoothed his hand down Jesse’s nape and along his spine, then reversed the path back up again. “But he’s not me.” His cool mouth trailed over Jesse’s temple, the tip of his tongue catching at the corner of the eye. “Haven’t you been hammering that into my head all night?” “Yes, but don’t try to be logical. This isn’t logical. This is me being reminded that you’re not untouchable.” He felt rather than saw Gideon’s smile. “Oh, I think you’re pretty much proving I’m touchable.” Jesse turned his head and pressed his mouth against Gideon’s neck. “Yes, and kissable, too.” He closed his eyes and inhaled. The night air always clung so perfectly to Gideon’s skin. Jesse didn’t know why. He stood there for a long moment, simply enjoying the way Gideon smelled and felt and tasted. He realized he wanted to 134

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stay this close to Gideon, he wanted to sink into him, and be surrounded by him, and not let a single inch separate them. His skin crawled with the desire, and with the memory of the one time Gideon let him top. “Gideon…can I…fuck you?” The hand that had been stroking his back slowed but didn’t stop. “You know, I honestly expected you to ask for that a lot sooner than now,” Gideon said softly. “I almost suggested it myself more than once.” Jesse lifted his head to meet Gideon’s eyes. “Why?” He lifted a shoulder in a casual shrug. “I thought it might help you feel more in control. Show you that I’d do whatever you needed, change our relationship however you needed me to.” “Oh…Gideon…” Jesse struggled to find a way to respond, because sometimes Gideon still found ways to shock the hell out of him, and he never knew what to do with that. “I appreciate the thought but…God, if there’s one thing I don’t want to change, it’s you…our relationship.” The smile returned, soft and knowing. “Well, you’re stuck now anyway. You’ve got my mark on you.” The reminder sent a sharp spiral of desire through him, and he none-too-gently pushed against Gideon, forcing him to walk backward toward the bedroom. “Yes, I do, and nobody’s even noticed yet.” “Maybe I need to parade you naked down the street then.” They passed through the doorway, sinking into the darkness. Gideon’s eyes caught the lamplight from the other room and 135

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gleamed, even as the rest of him disappeared. “I’ve got a new leash at home I’ve been waiting to try. Sounds like the perfect opportunity to me.” “We’d get arrested if we tried that. I don’t particularly want to go to jail.” Now he finished unbuttoning Gideon’s shirt and pushed it over his shoulders. His mouth was drawn to Gideon’s taut skin and his hands moved to his belt. “But you could always try your new leash at Sangre.” They reached the edge of the bed, but Gideon didn’t fall back onto it, giving Jesse the time to undo his pants. “I think I might prefer a private showing first. Emma’s been chomping at the bit to use it, but I told her we had to wait until you were ready.” Jesse was struck by several memories at once—how good the belt around his neck felt while Gideon was fucking him, how much he loved the way Emma looked when she dangled a leash between her fingers, how much he enjoyed dropping to his knees for both of them. He wanted to get to his knees and swallow Gideon’s length once he unzipped his pants, but he opted to guide Gideon backward to the bed, instead. “I think I’m ready for a private showing.” Stretching out, Gideon folded his fingers behind his head, his legs sprawled so that the line of his erection was more than clear. Experience told Jesse it was a deliberate act. Gideon might let him fuck him now, but it was all too clear who was still in charge. “When we get home, then. Right now, you can’t fuck me when we both have so many clothes still on.” Jesse pulled Gideon’s pants down his legs, then paused 136

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again to study him. There was nothing wrong with his body. Nothing. Jesse had seen him like this a million times, but Gideon’s body never failed to stun him. He stripped his own clothes off quickly, grimacing slightly at the stiffness of the shirt and pants. His own sweat and Gideon’s blood had pretty much ensured neither could be worn again. Once naked, he knelt between Gideon’s legs, his mouth watering for a taste. Gripping Gideon’s thighs, he bent his head and ran his tongue down his shaft, from the crown to his smooth sac. “That’s it,” Gideon murmured. He reached down and threaded his fingers through Jesse’s hair, pulling him closer so that his nose buried in the musky skin. Jess opened automatically to suck one of the balls past his lips, and the taste did exactly as he’d imagined, his mouth suddenly warmer, wetter, as he moaned in satisfaction. Jesse sucked two fingers into his mouth without releasing Gideon, wetting them thoroughly, before sliding his hand down Gideon’s body. He sought out Gideon’s hole, pushing one finger past the tight ring of muscle. The soft encouragement that had been coming from Gideon changed into a long, drawn-out groan. Without prodding, he bent his knees and widened his legs, giving Jess better access. The muscles clenched around Jesse’s finger, and the memory of what that would feel like around his cock sent a shock straight to his groin. “You need to think about doing this a little more often than once a year,” Gideon said. “Fuck, but this feels good.” 137

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Jesse silently agreed as he added a second finger. He moved his hand, gradually stretching Gideon. He moved his mouth from Gideon’s balls, sliding his tongue up Gideon’s length to find the pre-come already gathering on the tip. He lapped at the salty fluid, sucking the crown between his teeth. Gideon jerked at the sharp pressure, clenching around Jesse’s fingers. The hand at the back of his head slipped to his shoulder, tugging him off-balance. “Get up here, boy. You’re not the only one getting a taste.” Jesse didn’t hesitate to swivel his body around, throwing his leg over Gideon’s chest just as Gideon grabbed his hips and yanked him backward. Something wet dragged down his aching shaft, followed by a tilt of his body that pushed his ass in the air. “That’s better,” he heard Gideon say. In the next instant, the hands gripping his hips pulled him close again, the length of his cock sinking into Gideon’s waiting mouth. Jesse closed his eyes, unable to move at all for a moment as Gideon swallowed his length. He teased more pre-come from Gideon’s slit before kissing and nibbling a path to where his fingers disappeared inside Gideon’s body. He replaced his fingers with his tongue, tracing the tip around Gideon’s hole. The grip on Jesse’s hips tightened, and the pressure around his cock increased as Gideon hollowed his cheeks. With a soft moan, Jesse pushed his tongue into Gideon’s passage. The thought of fucking Gideon had never occurred to him 138

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until an innocent observation from Emma put the notion into his head. It wasn’t something he ever actively sought out, his desires more than satisfied by Gideon’s other attentions. But feeling the way Gideon’s ass quivered around him, the way the muscles in his thighs tensed and relaxed, as if in search of some middle ground, how he swallowed Jesse’s cock without hesitation each time Jess buried his tongue into his body…it was enough to make him consider asking for it more often. Maybe next time, Emma could watch. Even better, maybe next time, Gideon could fuck Emma while Jesse fucked him. The sensations would be all that much more intense with her desire trumpeting through all three of them. Jesse was quivering, eager for more, but at the same time, he knew it would be too easy to stay in that position, using his mouth on Gideon as Gideon returned the favor. Pleasure crawled down his spine, and he finally lifted his head, gasping for breath, desperate for more. “Gideon…I need…to fuck you now.” Jesse bit off the final please, but it still hung in the air. As smoothly as Gideon had guided him to his mouth, he eased his hold on Jesse’s hips, his tongue tracing one last path along the throbbing vein that ran down the underside before letting it go as well. “Come here, boy,” came the husky command. He waited until Jesse had turned completely around, hooking his hands beneath his armpits and hauling him up so that he was stretched out along Gideon’s length. His eyes dropped to Jesse’s mouth, and while his tongue ran over his 139

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lower lip, his fangs slowly descended. In Jesse’s mind, it looked like slow motion as Gideon reached to kiss him, his heart pounding in anticipation of the fresh sting the caress would bring. Hot blood splashed over his lips and tongue before Gideon caught it. He chased each drop, lapping it, letting it warm his mouth. Jesse didn’t pull away from the sting, shivering each time Gideon pulled another thread of blood from his lips. Gideon had complete control over his fangs, and the sharp points didn’t catch Jesse’s mouth again until the taste of blood faded. A fresh trickle drifted down his chin and Gideon pulled away to catch that as well. “Want your cock in me.” He licked the dark stubble of Jesse’s jaw, shifting his hips enough to rub their shafts together. “I want you in me so deep, I taste your come when I bite you.” Jesse gripped his shaft, guiding himself to Gideon’s slick opening. He caught his breath, holding it, as he pushed the tip into Gideon’s tight ass. Gideon hooked his leg around Jesse’s hips, urging him deeper and deeper. He was already tight enough to make Jesse whimper, but when he clenched his muscles, it was almost too much to tolerate. Jesse moaned, but the sound was cut off by Gideon’s tongue thrusting into his mouth. The band of Gideon’s arms around the back of his neck, his waist, stole what little room Jesse had to thrust. He sank into the hungry kisses, content for the shallowest of strokes, and rocked in and out of Gideon’s channel for what felt like 140

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endless minutes. Gideon was careful with his fangs, never nicking when there was already blood flowing, but each time Jesse felt the urge to push harder, a fresh cut would send a cascade of shivers along his skin and overpower the impulse. Occasionally, the urge to close his eyes would overpower Jesse, and his eyelids would fall shut as he tried to withstand all the overwhelming sensations. Gideon’s hard body beneath him, his mouth alternatively sharp and soft, the tight, hot pressure around Jesse’s shaft. But Gideon never gave in to the same impulse. He watched him with yellow, flashing eyes. There was danger in his gaze, but not to Jesse. And Gideon’s body trembled with his restrained power. “See?” Gideon murmured. He loosened his iron hold to allow a few more inches of space, spurring Jesse to lengthen his slow, even strokes. “Nothing to be afraid of.” Jesse nodded, his fingers folding into the pillow beside Gideon’s head. He took every inch he was allowed to have, wondering how long he could withstand the friction and pressure. He moved his lips away from Gideon’s, trailing kisses over his jaw and cheek and brow. He ran his tongue over the ridge, drawing a low moan—or maybe it was a growl—from Gideon’s chest. So caught up in tasting everywhere he could reach, Jesse was barely aware of Gideon’s hand smoothing down along his flank. Long fingers curved to cup a single ass cheek, and after a few moments of squeezing and massaging the flesh, Gideon moved inward, tracing the crack in time with Jesse’s thrusts. “Know what might be fun?” He stopped at the tight hole 141

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and slowly sank two fingers inside. “Putting a strap-on on Emma so she can fuck you the next time we do this.” The image was powerful enough to arrest Jesse’s muscles, and he stilled for a moment. He could see Emma holding the leash, and though Gideon hadn’t mentioned it, Jesse also imagined himself wearing the nipple clamps that had long chains to attach to his cock ring. Emma would pull on the leash while Gideon yanked on the chains… “Oh, God…” The addition of a third finger prompted Jesse to move again, his skin slick and hot everywhere he touched Gideon. The added fervor to his strokes transferred to the force of Gideon’s fingers. He slammed their mouths back together, no longer heedful of the fangs, and his growls became almost continuous as their bodies moved together. More pre-come dripped from his cock, coating Jesse’s stomach, while more blood flowed from Jesse’s tender lips, filling their mouths. When he tore away, the hunger in his eyes was undeniable. Jesse tilted his head without a word. His lashes fluttered shut as Gideon gripped him tighter, holding his neck steady as he pressed his open mouth above his favorite spot. The sweet stab of fangs sinking into his flesh made him moan, but it was the hard pulls that seemed to reach all the way down to his cock that made his senses spin. Satisfaction snaked through Jesse. The sort of satisfaction that could only come from knowing he was exactly where he belonged, that he belonged to Gideon completely, that Gideon belonged to him. He buried himself in Gideon, filling him, and 142

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Gideon responded by biting a little bit harder, swallowing another mouthful of blood. The added pain was unexpected but not unwelcome, and Jesse froze, a dark wave of pleasure rushing through him. His cock jerked against Gideon’s walls, and he came with a sharp moan. Almost as soon as he shot into Gideon’s ass, Gideon’s cock jerked against his stomach, covering him in streams of come. Gideon eased his fingers out of Jesse’s ass at the same time he extracted his fangs. Delicately, he licked over the puncture marks, catching the stray droplets that tickled along Jesse’s skin, before skimming his lips up to Jesse’s ear. “No more worries,” he whispered. “No more fear. I’m fine, and I’m not going anywhere.” Jesse nodded. “I know.” His urge to be illogical passed, but he didn’t want to pull away from Gideon. He relaxed against him, his muscles weak, his eyes heavy, and rested his head on Gideon’s shoulder. His Gideon was there and fine, but he couldn’t help but wonder about Mary. And worry about her. He decided to go check on her when he woke up and make sure she didn’t need anything. It seemed like the least he could do.

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CHAPTER 11 Jesse woke gradually. It was the slow, natural waking of somebody who was fully rested, instead of the violent yanking out of nightmares he was accustomed to. He knew it was still daylight without glancing at his watch, because Gideon still seemed entirely dead to the world. He moved carefully, bypassing the dirty clothes for another trip to Gideon’s closet. Once dressed, he headed into the kitchen to scrounge what food he could. The signs that Gideon used that kitchen, actually cooked in that kitchen, left a peculiar ache in his chest. They were invading somebody else’s home. It hadn’t bothered Jesse before, but now that he was trying to keep the two vampires separate, it felt like a violation. He made himself 144

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some toast and coffee, then found the note he had left for Gideon the day before. He scratched out the old lines, replacing them with I’ve gone to Mary’s to ask about last night. Maybe he saw his attackers. I’ll call you if he tells me anything. Love you. He made sure to grab the cash Gideon had brought, resolved he would go shopping before the end of the day. And it occurred to him that the injured Gideon might need more blood. He wouldn’t be surprised if Mary didn’t want to leave him long enough to go to the butcher’s. Jesse walked briskly through the unfamiliar city he knew so intimately, his head spinning with information. Did Gideon have any known enemies during this period? Were there any blatant power grabs? Was this about an old grudge? Did Gideon have more old grudges than anybody else in the world? Probably, Jesse acknowledged. Nobody liked Gideon except himself, Emma, and Mary. It was a small and exclusive club. But with that in mind, Jesse knew they could spend months trying to track down the culprit. And they didn’t have months. They had three days. Jesse didn’t want to think about what it would mean to leave the dimension, to go home, with the job only halffinished. Gideon healed quickly, but he wouldn’t be ready for a fight for at least a week, if not more. And they already knew from past experience that whoever was after Gideon wouldn’t hesitate to target Mary. Three days. 145

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It wasn’t enough time, Jesse was certain. It wouldn’t even be enough time in a city and a time period Jesse knew, and he was a real fish out of water here. His only hope was that it wasn’t a grudge. At least that would narrow down the list. When he reached Mary’s door, he hesitated, straining to hear voices or any signs they were awake. Was Mary’s sleeping schedule as messed up as his? Did she sleep at all with her lover, injured and mangled beside her? He didn’t want to disturb them, and he didn’t want to go in, but he knew what had to be done. With a sigh, he knocked softly. Moments passed where he heard nothing. Just when he was about to turn away, leave and get his shopping done first to return a little bit later in hopes that Mary would be awake, a chain scraped across the other side of the door. It cracked open only the inch necessary to peer out, but almost immediately swung wider. Though her face was devoid of make-up, Mary’s eyes were clear and alert, sweeping over him incisively before she spoke. “I’ve got soup left from lunch,” she said, holding the door for him to enter. “Come on in and eat something. You look like you could use it.” “Thanks.” Jesse glanced at the closed bedroom door as he entered the apartment. “Is he asleep?” “No. Probably not.” She led him through the darkened living room to the kitchen. “He’ll doze, but he’s too angry to get some real rest. I finally just shut the door and told him if he kept being difficult, I’d give him a sponge bath with holy water.” 146

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Jesse couldn’t help but smile. But it wasn’t the threat that amused him—it was that he didn’t doubt she would do it. “Do you think he’d be willing to talk to me?” “If it kept him from sleeping, yes. But nobody’s talking to anybody until you get some food in you.” Mary went straight to the refrigerator and pulled out a covered container. “You’re not allergic to chicken and rice, are you?” Jesse didn’t protest. He knew better from living with Gideon and Emma. A sharp pain went through him at the thought of Emma. It felt good to reconnect with Gideon, and some things were starting to make sense, but he wished she were there. Her mere presence was usually enough to soothe him. “No, I’m not allergic to chicken and rice.” He sat down at the table, watching as she poured the soup into a pan. “Do you need anything? Blood or anything? I can run out and pick up a few things.” Mary shook her head. “Hal’s bringing over supplies.” She cast him another sweeping glance. “Let me get this going and I’ll call him and ask to bring some clothes for you. You look like a little kid playing dress-up in Gideon’s stuff.” “Yeah.” Jesse smoothed his hand over his chest. “Thank you. I appreciate that. We couldn’t carry much for this trip. I suppose if I told you that his clothes used to fit better, you’d insist on feeding me more soup.” Her smile was warm, as comforting as the familiar smell already wafting from the stove. “I’m a little surprised he let you out, looking like that. I’ve never known a guy who took 147

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clothes as seriously as some women do.” “I got away with it yesterday because he was…very distracted. I got away with it today because he was asleep when I left. But I probably shouldn’t press my luck tomorrow.” When Gideon and Emma proposed he jump dimensions to find Gideon’s first real love and rescue her, Jesse never thought he’d be chatting with her in her kitchen. But he was. And he didn’t mind. “In the interest of fairness, though, you should warn Hal that I’m probably going to stain and ruin whatever he brings me.” “Wouldn’t be the first time.” Jesse contented himself with watching as she got the soup warming. There was a briskness to her movements, sharp and clean as she was long and angular, but they were tempered with knowing hands. Gideon was in good care, even if it was difficult to imagine someone taking Jesse’s role. This had been his job, for as long as he’d known Gideon. By the time she’d made the call, the kitchen smelled of the bubbling soup. Mary ladled out a big bowl, then sat down next to Jesse when she placed it in front of him. “Is he okay?” Her dark eyes were solemn. “Your Gideon. Last night must have been…hard.” “He wasn’t, at first. When I told him I thought whoever was behind…your attack…was still out there, he wasn’t happy. But Gideon always feels better when he has something to do. Once we decided we were going to figure out who set up last night’s trap, he seemed to calm down a bit.” “Is that why you want to talk to him? My Gideon, I mean.” 148

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“Yes.” Jesse tapped his fingers against the tabletop. “Maybe he saw somebody he recognized, or heard something.” He leaned over and began stirring the soup with an absent flick of his wrist. “My hope is that we don’t have to figure out who Gideon pissed off in the recent past.” Her light laughter filled the kitchen. “How long has it taken you to perfect saying that with a straight face?” “Oh, that’s just my hope. I know the chances are good we’re looking for somebody with a serious grudge. Normally I could start compiling a list myself but…” Jesse shrugged and sipped a mouthful of soup. It burned his tongue a little. Mary sobered, her gaze drifting toward the doorway. “I would suggest letting me put that together, but Gideon might be a little upset I know half the names on that list. He thinks he has to protect me.” “I know. I hope you don’t mind it too much, because as near as I can tell, he’ll never lose that impulse. And sometimes, he gets damned near maniacal about it. You should put the list together anyway. Then we can compare it to whatever he tells me—if he wants to talk to me at all—and that should give us a decent picture of the situation.” Nodding, she rose from the table, disappearing into the living room to leave him with his thoughts. His soup was nearly gone by the time she returned, a folded piece of paper in her hand. “Don’t tell him I gave this to you,” she said, sliding it across the table to him. “I won’t tell anybody.” Jesse pushed aside the empty bowl 149

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of soup and leaned forward. “And how are you doing? I know I was pretty upset last night and I…are you okay?” He thought she looked like she was going to profess being perfectly fine, but then her attention flickered to the doorway again, and her wide mouth tightened. “I’ve never seen him like this. I know he gets hurt. I know he still fights, other than what we’re doing. But he’s always been very careful about not letting me see it. And I think I’ve always been a little grateful for that. It makes it easier to focus on things that are more important.” The small smile she turned in his direction was more than a little melancholy. “So I guess I’m feeling guilty today. Because I want to be selfish and just take care of him. Even if he doesn’t want me to.” Jesse nodded, and a part of him wanted to assure her that she didn’t need to feel guilty, that a part of Gideon probably wanted her to take care of him, that she should ignore his more obnoxious and difficult moods. But he was not the expert on All Things Gideon here. Mary would know how to handle the vampire without his help. “I’ve never seen him like that, either. That’s why I’m pretty sure he walked into a trap, somehow. Look, I know you have Hal and Marcus and your whole congregation for support, but if you need anything…I’ll help any way I can.” Her moment of weakness vanished, her manner turning efficient once again. “Convince Gideon to get some sleep,” Mary joked. Picking up his bowl, she carried it to the sink to rinse it out. “Let me know if he wants anything.” Jesse nodded. He wished he could stay in Mary’s warm 150

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kitchen. He’d even eat another bowl of soup, if she wanted. But he needed information and Gideon was the best source. He knocked once on the bedroom door, though he knew Gideon would have heard his approach, and then let himself in. A single lamp in the corner lit the room, and Gideon’s good eye glittered at him from the bed. He looked better than the night before, though not by much, and the bruises were a splotchy rainbow on his pale skin. Did Gideon even remember him from the church? “Hey. How are you feeling?” “I’m bored. And who the hell are you?” “My name is Jesse Madding. I was at the church last night. I stitched up your leg and helped set your foot. I told Mary I’d help find out who attacked you.” Even with only one eye, Gideon made raking his gaze over Jesse’s body a shivery experience. “Why? I don’t know you.” “You don’t know me, but I know you.” There wasn’t a chair in the room, so Jesse leaned against the wall. “It’s a very long, crazy story. I came here from another dimension. In my dimension, it’s a little over forty years in the future, and your counterpart and I….” Jesse pulled his collar down, exposing the fresh bite on his neck. “He’s here in the dimension, too.” Gideon’s nostrils flared. “You mean there’s actually a dimension where Michelle didn’t fuck up my plans?” A slow smile curved his mouth. It reminded Jesse so much of when his Gideon had been hopped up on obsidian that his heart skipped a beat. “Good for him.” “There might be a dimension where Michelle didn’t fuck 151

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up your plans, but it isn’t mine.” Jesse was proud of the way his voice stayed calm, even though his body was reacting strongly to Gideon’s proximity. “In my dimension, she staked you and hung you upside down on a cross. But she is the one who sent us here. To save Mary. But as it turns out, you’re the one in real danger.” Gideon had scowled at the clarification, but as soon as Jesse mentioned Mary, everything in his face hardened. “Save Mary? From what? Those vamps who jumped me last night?” If Jesse worried Gideon wouldn’t cooperate with him, then uttering the magic words soon put those doubts to rest. Gideon would do whatever it took to save Mary, even aid a virtual stranger. “Not those vamps specifically, no. They’re minions. We killed the vamps who we thought would hurt Mary, but…the thing is, we don’t know who is after you. And until we do, neither of you are particularly safe.” “Those bastards might have been minions, but they weren’t idiots,” Gideon shot back. “They knew exactly where to find me, and they knew how to fight. That’s got to narrow the pack down a little.” “Absolutely. It narrows the list down to people and demons who want to see you dead, and are willing to take the time to plan it properly. I’m guessing that’s not a very short list.” Gideon’s grimace answered more clearly than any words he might utter. “So what do you want from me? I won’t be any good hunting until my ankle’s healed a little more. Tomorrow night, 152

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at the earliest.” “I need to know the circumstances. How did they get the drop on you? Was it a trap? Did they use bait? Also, I want you to stop giving Mary a hard time and get some rest so you can actually heal, but we’ll take this one thing at a time.” His glare was classic Gideon. “You’re a bossy son of a bitch, aren’t you?” “Yeah, I guess so. I prefer to think of myself as efficient. Either way, some day you’ll learn to appreciate that.” He didn’t flinch under Gideon’s unwavering gaze. He’d had years of practice in not kowtowing to his less desirable moods. Now, if this Gideon tried the sort of tactics his Gideon utilized to get his way, there might be problems. But he wasn’t going to be able to do it in his current condition. “Fine,” Gideon conceded. “I’ll tell you everything I can remember. It’s not much.” His mouth tightened. “Things are a little…blurry.” Jesse nodded. He didn’t have a notebook with him, but it didn’t matter. He wasn’t going to forget a single detail of this story. Later, he would have his Gideon look over the list Mary gave him. Maybe that, combined with whatever information he could garner from Gideon’s tale, would be enough to point them in the right direction.

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CHAPTER 12 Gideon stared at Jesse in disbelief. “You have got to be kidding me. No way am I letting you anywhere near Sangre.” “Well, there’s no way I’m letting you go alone,” Jesse responded in a much softer tone. He looked completely unperturbed at the notion of returning to Sangre for the first time since the Brooker incident. In fact, his heart hadn’t even fluttered when Gideon had announced what he was going to do. If Gideon didn’t know better, he’d think that Jesse hadn’t had any trauma whatsoever related to the kinds of things that could happen at the vampire club. But that didn’t change the fact that he wasn’t about to let Jesse within a mile of the place. 154

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“What’s the point?” Gideon said. “Nobody there’s going to talk to you anyway.” “Who is going to talk to you if you go alone? You’ll look suspicious, and you know it. I’m sure word got around that Gideon Keel was jumped and beat just a few nights ago. And now Gideon Keel is going to a BDSM club without a pet. Do you think it’ll take anybody long to draw the right conclusions about that?” Which was part of the reason Gideon had put off considering Sangre as an option for as long as he had. The past two nights, he’d scoured Chicago, chasing down as many of the leads his counterpart had suggested. Jesse had gone with him on those sojourns, covering for him as much as possible so that nobody would be the wiser about a second Gideon Keel in town. But nothing had panned out. They met dead end after dead end, and now, here they were, their last night in this dimension, and they weren’t any closer to stopping the threat against him and Mary than they had been when they’d first discovered it. Drastic times called for drastic measures. That didn’t mean he was willing to put Jesse on the line for it, though. “I don’t know what to expect at this Sangre,” he tried instead. “And you haven’t even wanted to go to the one we do know. If you panic there, every vampire in the place is going to know it, and they’re going to eat you alive. Literally.” “Yes, Gideon, I know. I haven’t forgotten what vampires are or what they do. I know I’m vulnerable at Sangre, in any dimension. But I’m not going to panic.” He paused, as though 155

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reconsidering his words, before adding, “As long as you don’t chain me with my hands over my head, or use a whip.” “You would have to be naked.” Gideon folded his arms over his chest, sure he had won. “You can’t even undress in front of Emma right now.” Jesse’s lips thinned. “Because I can’t stand the thought of seeing disgust on Emma’s face. Vampires wouldn’t react the same to the scars.” He had a point. Vampires would find the marks left on Jesse’s body an invitation, more than anything else. “She wouldn’t be disgusted, you know,” Gideon said, softening his voice. “You’re not giving Emma enough credit.” “It’s a normal reaction, even if it’s brief. Look, do you think I’d put us both at risk, and by extension, Mary? I don’t want to die here. I wouldn’t insist if I thought I couldn’t handle it.” There was no getting around this. Gideon had been in enough arguments with Jesse to recognize the signs he wouldn’t give in. It would be nice to avoid going altogether. They were due back in their own dimension in less than twenty-four hours. They had done what they had initially set out to do. It wasn’t their fault that things had exploded. Jesse had saved Brooker from his fate. He’d met Mary, face to face. There was good there. Room to heal. There was also room to fester. If they returned without being certain they had eradicated the threat to the other Gideon and Mary, it would eat at Jesse, just as surely as the 156

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memories of the torture did. He would find some way to blame himself, and they would be back where they started from. “I hate it when you’re right,” he muttered. “I know you do.” Jesse smiled. “One would think you’d be used to it by now. We’re not really prepared for a trip to Sangre now, though. I don’t suppose you have a spare collar hidden away somewhere?” Gideon shook his head. “Mary never had one.” “I didn’t think to pack mine. Maybe you can go out and buy a few things while I get ready?” “No, I’m not leaving you alone here. Go do what you need to get ready. I’ll take care of everything.” Though Jess looked unsure, he nodded and retreated to the bedroom, closing the door behind him. Gideon waited until he heard the shower start before picking up the phone and dialing from memory. Mary answered on the second ring. “Can you do me a favor?” he asked, ignoring the pang he always felt when he heard her voice. “I need Hal to pick up a few things for me, but I can’t remember his number.” “Sure. Give me the list. I’ll tell him what to get.” He rubbed his eyes. The last thing he needed was for Mary to hear these particular details. “That’s okay. There’s no reason for you to play middleman here. Just give me the number, and I’ll call him myself.” Her low chuckle warmed him, even though he knew it shouldn’t. “You don’t really think you can give me the 157

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runaround, do you?” Before he could find a response, she added, “But if you don’t want me to know, that’s your business. Here you go.” He scribbled down the number she rattled off, repeating it back to her when he was done. “Thanks. This should help.” Now that he had her on the phone, it was tempting to keep her there, but the distant sound of the shower stopped him. Gideon gave his good-byes and promptly hung up. He couldn’t let go of the receiver. His hand was shaking. “Damn it,” he muttered. It was a good thing Jesse wasn’t seeing this. He seemed to be dealing with the reality of Mary pretty well, but the last thing Gideon wanted was for him to see how hard it was for Gideon himself. They had enough shit to cope with right now. By the time he dialed Hal’s number, his body felt more in control. It was even more so when he hung up and strode for the bedroom. Jesse wasn’t the only one who needed to get ready. *

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He’d borrowed his counterpart’s car for the duration of their stay, and though he didn’t say a word about it to Jesse, Gideon felt a deep sense of homecoming sliding behind the wheel of his ’58 black Corvette convertible. This had been his last loved car before the Ferrari, but Mary’s death had stripped him of any pleasure he’d had from it. It went on the auction block as soon as he opened the office, his excuse that it wasn’t practical for what he wanted to do not ringing true even to his 158

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ears. But he’d missed its sleek lines, the way just turning a corner sent a surge of barely controlled power through his veins. With Jesse’s scent mingling with the blood and sex that already soaked the interior, Gideon was hard long before they hit Sangre, which made it easier to forget his anxiety about taking Jesse along. They could do this. Jesse could do this. He trusted Jess to know what he was doing. Out of the corner of his eye, he watched Jesse toy with the leash that dangled from the plain leather collar he already wore. “We’ll have to mingle first,” he said, as if he hadn’t said it a hundred times already. “And you’re fresh meat. Everyone’s going to want a piece of you.” “I’ve been fresh meat before. I know what it means.” Jesse smiled, but Gideon couldn’t tell if he was actually amused. “It’s been awhile, but I remember the rules. Do what you say. Only speak when spoken to. No safe words.” Gideon reached across and rested his hand on Jesse’s thigh, giving it a comforting squeeze as he turned the corner onto Sangre’s street. “I’ll keep it sexual. Only submission games tonight. No pain.” “That’s probably for the best.” Jesse rested his head against the window, watching as Sangre approached. “It wasn’t bad being fresh meat before. There was something in that submission…something like a release. Or relief.” Gideon hoped tonight would be more of the same for him. 159

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There wasn’t time to say so, though, before they pulled up to the curb. The bouncer was a different face, the music a different beat, but the club’s interior was exactly the same. With Jesse’s leash looped loosely around his hand, Gideon led him through the maze of bodies, pale skin against paler as they flocked around single human pets poised on the long, low couches. Everything happened here at Sangre. Vampires fucked, drank, savored the people who were brought for their debauchery. It was a safe environment if the vampires had a tight enough control on their pet. He and Jesse had had numerous nights of pure pleasure in the environment of their own dimension. But this was unknown. He didn’t recognize most of the faces they passed. He didn’t know the bartender who gave him the pint of blood and shot of whiskey before he’d even ordered. He felt every curious glance from others who recognized him, however. And he heard every thud of Jesse’s heart as Gideon leaned his elbows back against the bar. Time to get the show on the road. Curling his lip, Gideon deliberately raked his gaze over Jesse’s lean form, lingering on the bulge in his crotch long enough to lick his lower lip. “How am I supposed to show off my favorite cockslut when he’s got so many clothes on?” he complained. “Or do you want me to let you loose and have the crowd tear them off you, boy?” Jesse looked at him for a long moment, like he couldn’t remember his next line. Gideon’s gaze was unwavering, hard with expectation, but he hoped Jesse saw encouragement 160

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there, too. “No, Sir.” Jesse’s fingers didn’t shake as he unbuttoned his shirt. In fact, nothing betrayed his nerves except the increased rate of his heart. He draped the shirt over a barstool, then added his pants and shoes. Every single time Jesse had undressed in front of Gideon in the past six months, without fail, he had turned away. Gideon didn’t know if it was an automatic reaction, or if Jesse was consciously trying to shield himself from Gideon’s eyes. But this time, he didn’t move. He stood patiently in his collar and cock ring, his body utterly exposed. Gideon’s gaze returned to Jesse’s groin, his mouth watering at the sight of the erection, the glistening drop of precome collecting in the slit. Before he could make a comment about it, however, a scrawny vamp sidled up to him. “Who’s the new toy?” he said, leering at Jess. “You’ve never brought this one in before.” Gideon smiled. “This one’s from my private collection. I felt like sharing the wealth tonight.” “What makes this one so special?” Jesse averted his eyes, like the good pet he was, and didn’t even flinch as the other vampire leaned in to get a better look. He pointed at the scars on Jesse’s abdomen, not quite touching him. “What happened to him? Did you do that?” “Of course, I did. My boy takes a whip like a pro. Look at his back. He starts to bleed, and he’s already screaming for more.” It killed Gideon to have to claim ownership of Jesse’s 161

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hated scars, but this was part of the game. He couldn’t have the other vampire believing Jesse belonged to anybody but him. “Not tonight, though,” Gideon went on. “He’s being rewarded tonight, so I told him he could suck and fuck as many vamps as he wanted here. Isn’t that right, boy?” “Yes, Sir.” This time there was no hesitation. Jesse’s response was prompt, and even sounded eager. The vampire circled Jesse with an appreciative eye. He kept a respectful distance, but his gaze was as heavy as any touch could be. He ran his tongue over his fangs, and his cock was hard in his tight pants. “Then what are you waiting for? Let’s see what that pretty mouth of his can do.” There was the taste of anticipation in the air, familiar enough for Gideon to recognize the scent coming from Jesse. Pushing off the bar, he grabbed the leash and sauntered toward the nearest unoccupied couch, picking up interested stragglers along the way. By the time they reached their destination, another half dozen vampires circled them, waiting to see what exactly Gideon had in mind. Dropping the leash, Gideon pressed into Jesse’s back, rubbing his crotch against him as he fisted Jesse’s cock. “Tell the gang what you want, slut.” “Yes, Sir.” He leaned back against Gideon, using him for support. “I want you to fuck my ass until I can’t walk. I want you to fuck my mouth so I can swallow all of your come.” Jesse glanced up as a few women joined the crowd of eager 162

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on-lookers. “I want you to use my body. Please.” Gideon rubbed his palm over the tip of Jesse’s cock, coating it before lifting it to Jesse’s mouth. As Jess hungrily licked away the fluid, Gideon smirked at the others. “You’ll never see anybody who wants it more than my boy here. I want to see him drowning in come. And if you get a little careless and draw blood here or there…” He dropped his mouth over the most recent bite marks on Jesse’s neck, sucking hard enough at the flesh to draw a gasp from his lover. “Well, he just loves that even more.” The vampires all smiled and growled in approval as Gideon pushed Jesse to the couch. Using the collar, he forced Jesse to sit down, then lie back, his head hanging over the arm, exposing his throat, his leg hooked up over the back, exposing his ass. The club was dim, the lights casting more shadows than anything, but Gideon could see Jesse’s blue eyes clearly. They weren’t darkened with fear. A thrill rolled through Gideon. Even if they were here for other reasons, seeing Jesse offering his body like this, watching the others drool and trip over themselves to get to him first, made Gideon ache with the desire to fuck him raw himself. This was often the best part about going to Sangre. Vampires fed on desire as much as blood. And in spite of everything else, Jesse wanted this. Gideon refrained from openly rubbing his cock, taking a step back to allow the others room. “Let’s see how much come we can make my slut take. Who wants to be first?” 163

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*

*

*

On the drive over to the club, Jesse had been resigned. It needed to be done. Gideon going on his own wasn’t an option, and Jesse recalled the eager anticipation that used to mark their visits to the club. Each wisp of excitement would be derailed by something akin to guilt. Going to the club required complete surrender. Wouldn’t it be a farce to surrender control he didn’t have? But as soon as they stepped into the door, something changed. The club was achingly familiar. He no longer felt resigned. Jesse had expected to be horrified by the vampires’ reaction to his marred body. How could they look at this mess he called skin with anything like desire? But they did. And they didn’t view him as a victim. No, he wasn’t something to be pitied. He wasn’t pathetic. He had told Gideon going to the club was something like relief, and he meant it. Nothing else he ever did captured the same feeling of abandonment as when he opened himself and closed his eyes, entrusting his body and his safety to Gideon, his Master. And when they were in the club, Jesse could think in those terms without censor. Which carried its own sense of relief. Jesse stared up at Gideon, his body awash with the anticipation he couldn’t find before. Gideon didn’t seem very worried about him anymore. Was it wrong to want this? Jesse didn’t know, and as two vampires approached, their thick cocks jutting against their stomachs, he didn’t care. 164

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“Don’t be shy,” Gideon said. The dark pools of his eyes were lost to Jess, but he recognized that husky growl in his voice. He snapped his fingers and a voluptuous redhead leapt to his elbow. “Get down there and get his ass ready. He’s going to have his mouth busy slicking up those cocks.” The redhead disappeared from Jesse’s view, and he felt small, cool hands spread his ass cheeks even more than they already were. The two waiting men positioned themselves on either side of his head, angling their lengths so that they slapped the dripping tips across Jesse’s face. One of them chuckled. “Look at the slut chase after it,” he rumbled. The tongue against his heated skin was cool at first, but it warmed as she thrust it inside of him. His groin tightened as she followed Gideon’s instructions, lavishing him with her mouth. He cried out when she let her fangs scrape against his skin, barely scratching him, and lapped up the beads of blood. His cry was muffled by one of the cocks sliding between his lips, and Jesse immediately shifted his attention to his given task. The vampire’s cock was long and smooth, already slick with salty fluid. As soon as Jesse began to adjust to his width, he pulled away, only to be immediately replaced by the second cock. His skin tasted different, saltier, and he was longer but not as thick. The first vampire pressed his crown against the corner of his mouth, waiting for his next turn. With his head hanging over the edge of the couch, his ears pounded from the blood rushing to either extremity. Jesse 165

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whimpered when he felt a strong hand grasp his cock, but when he braced himself for more, nothing came. Whoever was holding his shaft seemed content to squeeze him hard at random intervals, making him gasp when the two vampires at his mouth switched places again. “He likes it deep,” he heard Gideon say. “And he swallows like a champ. Make sure you bury yourself in his throat.” That was all the encouragement the vampires needed. He barely had a chance to prepare himself before the thicker cock was pushed deep into his mouth. He offered no resistance as it went down his throat, and the voice above his head encouraged him with, “That’s it. All the way. That’s a good little slut.” Jesse lifted off the couch, tilting himself back so he could take the full length. His nose brushed against the wiry hair at the base of the vampire’s cock. He held that position for several seconds before relaxing again. As he came back down to the sofa, the vampire between his legs replaced her tongue and fangs with three fingers. “This is one of those times I wish I had a prick,” the woman said. “His ass is just swallowing my fingers.” “Will he take a fist?” “Only one way to find out.” Her fingers disappeared. The next touch Jesse felt was the hard press of knuckles, burrowing inside his passage. It had been a long time since he had been fisted, but not so long that he forgot the sensation of pain, followed by intense pressure which turned into an almost equally intense pleasure. 166

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She paused once she worked her fist into his channel, and so did the vampire standing above him. For a brief moment, he was completely full, and he couldn’t see Gideon, but he could feel him. Feel Gideon’s fingers like steel bands around his shaft. Then everybody started to move again, in hard, disjointed rhythms. The cock in his throat twitched and jerked every time the vamp thrust. Jesse closed his eyes to focus on the sensations, moaning every time balls slapped against his face, nails scraped against his skin, fangs raked across his thighs. He felt one of the vampires at his head move away, but then Gideon tilted his cock away from his stomach and a cool tongue lapped at the head. “He’s used to fangs when I blow him.” It was Gideon speaking, which meant he was feeding Jesse to another vamp. “But if you go too far, I’ll tear them out, you got me?” Jesse knew, as the vamp must have, that if it went too far, Gideon wouldn’t just take Jesse’s cock away, he’d resort to violence, too. He trusted that he’d be safe, but he was still startled when he felt sharp fangs glide down his shaft. The vamp barely used enough pressure to make him twitch, but the slivers of pain were unmistakable. Another pair of hands went to his chest, caressing him. Within moments, the caress turned into something harder, and ten sharp nails scored his skin, drawing more trickles of blood. For a moment, he saw himself from above, already bleeding, surrounded by, covered in, hungry vampires. It might have 167

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been frightening, but Gideon’s fingers were still strong and sure where he held him. “You’re going to stretch him too far.” The complaint pulled the woman away from his ass, and Jesse felt the blunt tip of a thick cock take its place. He sighed around the length in his mouth as the other vampire filled him up again, burning even though the fist had prepared him for being thoroughly fucked. “He’s so pretty,” the woman cooed. Delicate fingertips trailed across his balls, disappearing for a few seconds before alighting again on his chest. They continued to move upward, stopping on the bite marks on his neck, and traced the tiny holes. “You always have the best taste in pets, Gideon.” She followed her words with the flat of her tongue, teasing the marks on his neck, then moving down to lick at the thin lines of hot blood on his chest. She made a deep, satisfied sound in the back of her throat, but didn’t try to make fresh grooves in his skin. He might have automatically dismissed what she said, but he barely had the power to process it. The cock in his ass was moving faster with each thrust, like the vampire really did want to split him in two. And the cock in his throat was jerking and twitching. He swallowed around the head, drawing a loud growl from the vampire above him, and then a flood of come. Jesse swallowed quickly and avoided choking. The length barely stopped twitching before the vamp was pushed aside and replaced by somebody with a dark, uncut cock. Jesse had 168

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just enough time to gasp for air before the head pressed against his tongue. His skin sizzled from all the conflicting sensations. There would be bruises left on his thighs from how tightly the vampire in his ass gripped him, and there would be a multitude of fresh scratches scored over his torso. The fanged mouth on his length disappeared, but the tilt of his head made it impossible to see what was happening. He felt it, though. He felt soft thighs straddle his hips, full breasts swing across his chest. He felt Gideon’s strong fingers wrapped around the base of his cock, and then wetness dragging over the head. “Oh, he’s going to be a fabulous fuck,” the woman said. She sank down, the suction of her tight pussy squeezing around Jesse’s shaft, and Gideon moved his hand away as late as possible so that she could take Jess in entirely. Jesse felt a small surge of anxiety as Gideon’s hand disappeared, but he put it flat against Jesse’s abdomen immediately. The vampire in his ass tensed, moved faster, harder, and then filled him with blast after blast of come. Jesse wanted to let go of his control and thrust deep into the woman riding him, but years of training kept that urge at bay. He’d come when Gideon said he could. Not a moment before. The vampire released his hips and moved away. They didn’t allow Jesse much of a respite before another cock filled him. His channel was well stretched and slick, and the vampire sheathed himself without hesitation. Jesse felt like he was being torn in three. He wanted to move his head, move his 169

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hips, move against the shaft and thrust deeper into the vamp riding him. But he couldn’t do any of that. So he relaxed and let them move and push and pull him anyway they liked. Whenever the vampire at his head gave him the chance, Jesse slipped his tongue beneath the foreskin, savoring each inch of the head he could reach. He didn’t expect the vampire to suddenly groan, flooding his mouth with thick fluid, and he didn’t expect him to pull out, spraying the last across his chin. He didn’t need to lick it away, though. Gideon was suddenly there, his broad hand beneath his neck, holding him still as he leaned in and cleaned it for Jess. “I think it’s my turn to fuck your face,” Gideon said softly. “And because you’ve been so amazing tonight, boy, you can come when I do.” “Thank you, Sir,” Jesse breathed, not just for the benefit of the vampires who had undoubtedly heard the exchange. He barely finished speaking before Gideon dipped his tongue past Jesse’s swollen lips. The kiss was softer than he expected and briefer than he wanted. Then Gideon’s mouth was gone. The woman on top of him dug her nails into his ribs and clenched tightly around his cock. Was there a new vampire at his ass? Jesse didn’t know. He couldn’t tell. He closed his eyes, and it felt like he was being carried away. He thought his skin would crack. His nerves were raw and screaming for release. He couldn’t distinguish between the sensations flying through him, unable to pinpoint the origin of anything. Everything blended together. Until Gideon eased his length into Jesse’s waiting mouth. 170

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The sharp sense of satisfaction at the first taste of Gideon’s cock would always eclipse anything else. Gideon kept his hand beneath Jesse’s neck, bracing him as he slowly pumped past Jesse’s lips. He kept it gentle, shallow, allowing Jess the space to enjoy the pre-come seeping from the slit. It completely blocked out the more vicious rhythms set by the other vampires. All there was, was Gideon. All there would ever be was Gideon. Jesse moaned in delight as he met Gideon’s dark eyes. Gradually, Gideon lengthened his strokes, pushing a little more in until the tip nudged the back of Jesse’s throat. “I fucking love your mouth, boy.” Love your cock. Love you. It didn’t matter if he couldn’t speak, he still told Gideon with his mouth. It wasn’t just a waiting receptacle for Gideon to fill. He used his tongue, and his throat, and his teeth, and the roof of his mouth. As the redhead braced herself against his chest, he even used the pitch and length of his moans to pleasure Gideon. Each thrust into his ass pushed him further on Gideon’s cock, but Gideon resisted the challenge to his rhythm. He moved at his own pace, like they were alone and he had all night to enjoy Jesse’s mouth. Jesse moved his arms for the first time, reaching up to grasp Gideon’s hips. Power radiated from Gideon’s muscles. Jesse didn’t have to see to know how Gideon was in control, each stroke measured and even, his hands calm and sure. If he needed any more assurances that Gideon would protect him at all costs, 171

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this was it. Their bodies formed a circle that nobody else could penetrate. Though Gideon never quickened the glides past Jesse’s lips, he pushed deeper on every other thrust, finally sinking into Jesse’s throat. Jess swallowed around the tip, but Gideon wasn’t settling for staying there. He continued to move, lingering seconds longer in the tight passage. The only indication he had that Gideon was close was the tensing of the fingers at his nape. The next time Gideon sank inside, Jesse scraped his nails across Gideon’s balls. He came with a grunt, his cock jerking against Jesse’s lips. Jess drank down the come, gulping at more when Gideon pulled back enough to continue to shoot across his tongue. Somewhere in the background, he heard growls of approval, but all he could concentrate on was not losing a single drop. As soon as Jesse caught the last string from the tip of Gideon’s cock, the pressure that had been threatening to crack his body finally found its outlet. His hips jerked off the couch and he thrust deep into the redhead’s quivering pussy. A shout ripped from his sore throat as he erupted into her, and his ass clenched down tightly around the cock still pistoning in and out of his body. The vamp pulled out of him with a grunt, and his come splashed on Jesse’s balls and thighs. There were a myriad of groans as the aftershocks raced through his body, and he felt like he could just melt into the cushions beneath him. The bodies disappeared, but before others could take their places, Jesse heard Gideon’s growls as he warned off anyone 172

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from touching. His strong hand reached down and stroked Jesse’s softening cock, rubbing the fluid into his tender sac, and he crouched down again, licking along Jesse’s jaw. “Let’s go clean you up for another round.” Jesse nodded, but he didn’t move until Gideon tugged on his leash. If they were anywhere else, Jesse would insist he couldn’t move, couldn’t walk. But he didn’t have that option here. His muscles and throat ached as he found his feet, and he wanted to reach for Gideon to steady himself, but he was already walking ahead, pulling the leash taut between them. The bathroom was cooler than the club and the silence was welcome. As soon as Gideon closed and locked the door behind them, Jesse carefully sat on the toilet. “Are you all right?” Gideon asked. “Yeah,” he rasped. “Probably not too much talking or sitting in my immediate future, but I’m…good.” Gideon turned on the water in the sink, dampening a paper towel. “Nobody seemed too surprised to see me here. I think we’ll go back out and hang at the bar for a little bit. See who approaches.” If nobody seemed surprised to see him, did that mean he regularly visited Sangre without Mary? There was no way he’d bring her here. Jesse couldn’t imagine her consenting to a place like this. He kept his question to himself. He had no desire to distract Gideon. He watched patiently as Gideon turned to him with the damp paper towel, not protesting as Gideon used it to wash his chin, cheeks, and lips. “Do you think anybody will try for 173

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round two?” “They’ll try.” His touch was gentle, his eyes dark. “Are you up for it?” Jesse knew Gideon wanted a concrete answer. Yes, absolutely. Or no, absolutely not. And he wasn’t going to make this decision for him. The problem was, Jesse didn’t know. He always felt up for more. “Yes. I think so. But not if you need me to be functional tomorrow.” Gideon tossed the towel into the trash. “Then the rest of the night will be hands off. Because tomorrow is more important than a couple orgasms.” Jesse nodded, and pulled a handful of toilet paper from the roll to wipe his thighs and groin. He was still sticky when he was done, but nothing short of a shower would make a difference. When he stood, he silently offered Gideon the leash again. He wasn’t upset by Gideon’s decision; he just hoped this trip had done some good, besides a few orgasms. They had less than twenty-four hours to find the person, or people, they were looking for and stop them before more damage could be done.

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CHAPTER 13 As Gideon helped Jesse out of the Corvette in front of the apartment building, Chicago whispered in his ear. Welcome home. Come and play… The call was familiar, a dream he’d had more than once in the past forty years. He would never deny the desire he had to return to what were simpler times, before grief and guilt had destroyed everything he’d known. But the warm body pressed into his side, the long arm curled around his waist, holding on to Gideon as he helped him inside, was all he needed to remember why it wasn’t worth it to dwell on what could have been. This wasn’t his Chicago. It never would be. In less than 175

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twenty-four hours, he’d roll into his own bed, with the lovers he’d chosen to share his existence with, and for the first time in decades, he would be able to tell himself that he had at least tried to make things better for Mary. He just wasn’t sure he had succeeded. Sangre didn’t give the answers he had been looking for. Hours of mingling after showing off Jesse had simply proven to Gideon that he was still respected in town, that he was a force to fear, and that vampires would do anything to get into his good graces. Even careful questions and jokes about his recent attack had led nowhere. Nobody wanted to claim ownership of such misdeeds, even to get into his good graces. Which said only one thing. Whoever was responsible was powerful enough to scare people as much as Gideon did. Jesse had spoken little since leaving the club, much to Gideon’s relief. He didn’t know how to broach the subject of what they were going to do next. Did they even have that luxury anymore? They were supposed to leave at sunset, and the attackers still roamed free. What more could they do when they would be trapped inside for a good part of the day? The questions were shoved aside, however, when they stepped into the corridor leading to the apartment. There, sitting on the floor outside his door, was Marcus Brooker. Jesse stiffened beside him, but otherwise, didn’t react visibly. Marcus jumped to his feet, his greeting dying on his lips as Jesse caught his attention. Though there were no obvious marks from the vampires in Sangre, he was still noticeably stiff and leaning heavily on Gideon. 176

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“Sorry to drop in on you like this. I just needed to talk about… Are you okay? Did something happen?” “I’m fine.” Jesse’s voice was soft and hoarse. “Nothing happened.” “It’s been a long night,” Gideon intervened. He opened the door and let Jesse enter first, stopping midway over the threshold. “Wait here, Pastor. I’ll be right out.” He didn’t wait for a response, guiding Jesse to the bedroom without saying another word. When there was another door closed between them, he finally relaxed enough to glance at Jesse. “Are you all right? I can get rid of him if you want me to.” “No, it’s okay. You should see what he wants. Well, maybe you should take him upstairs and see what he wants.” Jesse eased his shirt over his head. “But you can be rude to him, if you want.” Gideon grinned. “Do you want me to run the bath? You can soak until I come back.” Jesse sighed. “That sounds like a wonderful plan.” Gideon was already in the bathroom before Jesse finished speaking. Once the tub was half-full, he went into the bedroom to help a now naked Jesse. Another sigh escaped Jesse’s lips as Gideon lowered him into the water, his eyes immediately falling shut. “You can even be very rude, if you have to be.” He trailed his fingers along Jesse’s wet shoulder, lingering for only a moment before he stood up. “I’ll get rid of him as quick as I can. Don’t fall asleep on me.” 177

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With one last smile, Gideon went back out to the hall, pulling the door shut behind him to face Brooker again. He hadn’t wanted to fill the pastor in on his presence in this dimension in the first place, but Mary and Hal had deemed it necessary if they wanted to keep things contained. Gideon suspected that Mary had already figured out it was Brooker who was responsible for Jesse’s panic attack, but so far, she hadn’t said a word. If he was correct, she probably never would. “Let’s talk about this upstairs,” Gideon said. “Is he really going to be okay?” Marcus asked as he followed Gideon up the stairs. “He looked pretty…exhausted.” “He’ll be fine. He’s used to this.” “I see.” Marcus refused to meet Gideon’s eyes once they stepped out of the building. He kept looking down at his feet, or up overhead to the moon. “I’ve been thinking a lot about…about your dimension. And the future. I had a few questions.” Everything inside Gideon froze. “You don’t want to do that, Pastor.” Marcus either didn’t hear the hard edge in Gideon’s voice, or he was stupid enough to ignore it. “I just want to know if it gets better. If what we’re doing here, if what Mary is doing here, makes a difference. Sometimes…it feels like it’s an uphill battle with no end in sight.” This wasn’t his battle, not anymore, but Gideon couldn’t resist. “So you can quit if you decide it’s not worth it?” Marcus finally met Gideon’s eyes. “Is it so wrong to want 178

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to know if we’ve made a difference?” “It is if you’re going to use it as an excuse to give up.” “Why do you think I’d do that?” His eyes flashed. “I’d work harder. I’d do anything I could to change things, to reach Mary’s vision.” “Then it shouldn’t matter what the outcome is, should it?” He knew he didn’t really have a right to be frustrated with this version of Brooker; this man had done nothing at all to Jesse. For all Gideon knew, enough had changed already to keep Brooker from traveling the same path, should Mary end up dying again after they’d left. But the urge was still there. “Look,” he tried, lowering his tone. “What happens where I’m from is irrelevant. Things are different here. I don’t want to tell you one thing, and have something else come to pass.” “I’m not asking for some impossible knowledge here. I just…every Sunday I look at the children’s faces, and I wonder if I can keep telling them…Well, I’d ask you to imagine what that’s like, but I doubt you’d care.” His jaw locked for the split second he glared at Brooker. “It would be a good idea for you to remember that I’m different, too, Pastor.” “Are you?” Brooker’s wiry body was tense now, his shoulders squared. “You seem like the same vampire to me. Mary’s life is at risk right now because of her relationship with you. And I don’t know what’s happened to Jesse, but it’s obvious to anybody with eyes that he’s not well.” Something snapped inside him. His hand shot out and grasped Brooker’s throat, shoving 179

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him backward to pin him to the building. “He’s not well?” Gideon hissed. Leaning down, he met the man’s eyes, aware that his control was on a very tight rein at the moment. “You’re fucking right he’s not well. You want to know about the future? Which part do you want to hear about? The part where you strung him up from the ceiling and ran him through with every sharp object you could find? Or the part where you sold your soul and turned your back on everything Mary ever said or did? Don’t talk to me about how you’d do anything to reach her vision. I’ve been living with the ghosts of what you’ve done for the past six months.” Marcus clawed at the hand around his throat, his mouth hanging open in a fruitless attempt to gasp for breath. It would be easy to hold him until he simply stopped breathing. Then no matter what happened, this Marcus wouldn’t hurt the Jesse Madding who hadn’t even been born yet. And Gideon would get the satisfaction of killing him again. Gideon felt good about that plan. But he wouldn’t be able to face Mary. Or Jesse. Because Jesse didn’t want this man dead. Brooker’s hands fell away, and the light began to dim in his strange, yellow eyes. Gideon released him and stepped back, refusing to catch him as he collapsed to his hands and knees. He immediately gasped for breaths, but they sounded more like sobs. “I wouldn’t…Oh, God, I could never…” Someone else might have felt remorse for attacking the man. Gideon didn’t. 180

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“Never isn’t nearly as long as you think it is. Take it from someone who’s been around a hell of a lot longer than you.” Brooker sat back on his heels, but he didn’t make any attempt to stand. His hand went to his throat, and his eyes were already red. Gideon wanted to yank him to his feet and push him down the road and tell him to get the fuck out of his face. He took a threatening step, hoping Brooker would take the hint and get moving before Gideon could grab him again. The man’s red-rimmed eyes widened, but he wasn’t looking at Gideon. He was looking at something over Gideon’s shoulder. Before he could turn to see what had captured Brooker’s attention, a large foot connected with the small of his back. Gideon stumbled forward, but his imbalance remained for only a moment. He used the change in his posture to kick backward, connecting with the same large body who’d attacked him. The man went flying into the street, but there were three others, already filling the space he filled. Not men. Vampires. Behind him, Brooker scrambled to his feet. “Stay back,” Gideon growled. The last thing he needed was for the pastor to get in the way and get himself killed. “Do you have a stake?” Two vampires rushed at the same time, swinging wide. Gideon ducked at the last minute, one blow clipping his ear, and swept a leg out to knock the closest off his feet. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Brooker reach into his coat pocket, but there wasn’t time to see what it was before the third vampire tackled Gideon, hurtling him into the wall. 181

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A clatter echoed through the street. The trash cans next to Brooker went crashing onto the sidewalk as he pushed them between him and the oncoming attackers. “Here!” Brooker shouted. Gideon glanced up between punches and caught the stake tossed at him, twisting away to slam it back between his assailant’s shoulder blades. He didn’t wait for the dust to settle before facing the one who was finally picking himself off the road. His attacker’s buddy lunged, but with a stake in his hand, Gideon barely had to glance in his direction before driving it into its chest. Two down. But the vampire who’d made the first strike was the biggest of the bunch, and it was clear by his new wary approach that he was far smarter than his buddies. “Tonight was really the wrong night to fuck with me,” Gideon warned the circling vamp. He leapt sideways when the other threatened to go for Brooker. “Uh huh. I don’t think so.” “You and your precious humans,” the lead vampire sneered. “What, this one?” Gideon jerked a thumb at Brooker. “You’ve got to be kidding. Precious is the last fucking thing I’d call this one.” “Then give him over.” Gideon snorted. “Right. You don’t want him. You want me.” “No, not really.” But both attackers were moving before the last word was out of the leader’s mouth. They came in at different levels, one 182

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at shoulder level, the other at Gideon’s legs. Unwilling to lose his ground, Gideon took the blow to the throat, while kicking out at the other. The low vampire’s head snapped back, its skull cracking against the sidewalk. Gideon’s brows shot up when Brooker darted forward and pulled another stake out, but the pastor’s aim was off, the weapon landing off-center. The vampire with the stake in his chest tried to pull himself to his feet, despite his injuries. Gideon didn’t have enough time to get between Marcus and the vampire before the uninjured vamp lunged for him again. Gideon slammed the heel of his hand into the attacker’s nose, pushing the bone up into his brain. Blood gushed over his face and Gideon’s hand, and it slowed him down, but didn’t stop him completely. Gideon curled his hand into a fist, and he punched the vampire’s broken nose hard enough to snap his head back and send him stumbling against the wall, freeing a path to Marcus. He was doing a good job of dancing away from his vamp, but he didn’t make any attempt to pull the stake out his chest. Gideon got close enough to grab it and pull it out. The vampire made a single gesture to defend himself, but the second time the stake found the vampire’s chest, it was buried in his heart. Gideon kept the stake in hand and pulled it free as the vampire crumbled into dust. Spinning on his heel, he struck the other attacker as it made a move toward him. The dust settled at his feet, mingling with the remains of the vampire’s fallen comrade. The scent of his own blood pulled Gideon’s hand to his 183

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mouth so that he could suck away the droplets from his knuckles. The sting was welcome. Seeing Brooker cowering against the wall, eyes wide, was not. “Tell me you at least had the sense to drive here.” Marcus nodded and pointed to the corner. “Yeah, I brought my car.” “Are we done here?” “Can I…can I see Jesse? Talk to him?” He didn’t even consider it. “No. Go home.” Marcus opened his mouth like he was going to try to argue with Gideon. But perhaps his sense of self-preservation finally kicked in, because he nodded and turned to scuttle down the block. Gideon waited until the pastor was in his car and had driven away, the sound melting into the Chicago traffic. Only when he was certain he was alone in the street did he go back inside. The sound of lapping water filled the apartment. Jesse was still in the tub. Gideon was glad for that, and though he had the urge to go into the kitchen to clean up, keeping the evidence of the fight away from Jess, he sucked it up and went for the bathroom instead. Jesse’s eyes were half-closed, as though he was dozing, but he snapped to attention as soon as Gideon stepped into the room. “Marcus didn’t do that, did he?” Immediately, Gideon was furious with himself. He should have realized Jesse’s mind was going to go there. “No,” he said quickly. He went to the sink to start washing the blood off 184

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his hands. “We got jumped.” “Jumped by what? Vampires? Was it a random attack?” “Yeah, vamps. Four of them.” But it was the last question that made Gideon stop. “And no, it wasn’t random. They knew exactly who I was.” Jesse closed his eyes and dropped his head back. He was silent for so long, Gideon wondered if he had slipped into sleep. “So, they knew exactly who you were. And exactly where to find you. Almost as if you were followed.” Gideon frowned. “Because if somebody was looking for me, they would’ve gone to my other place first. The only way to know I’m here is if they followed us from Sangre.” Jesse touched the side of his nose without opening his eyes. “Now we just need to figure out which of the vampires at Sangre wants you dead.” “Easier said than done.” The last of the blood swirled down the drain, and Gideon turned off the water. “We talked to a lot of vamps tonight, but there were just as many who never said a word to us. It could be anybody.” “Yes, but at least we have a starting point now. Mere hours before we’re scheduled to go back to our own dimension.” The water splashed in the tub as Jesse straightened. When he opened his eyes, they were resolute, but not tired. “I don’t want to go back and leave things like this.” “I thought we didn’t have a choice.” “Staying is risky. In fact, there is a chance we won’t make it back ever. Is staying and saving…Mary from further attacks 185

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worth that risk?” That wasn’t really what Jesse was asking, but Gideon wasn’t going to push him to elaborate. “If you’re prepared to take the risk, then so am I,” Gideon said. “But when we get back, you’re the one who’s taking Michelle’s shit, not me.” “Fair enough.” He wiped his hands over his face. “I do miss Emma, though.” “And you’re still okay risking this?” “Yes. Somebody here has already brutally attacked this dimension’s Gideon. And now you’ve been attacked. I know what I said before….about him not being you, but he is.” It was on the tip of his tongue to joke he hadn’t been hurt that badly, but Jesse’s somber tone belied that instinct. Because Gideon couldn’t say he wouldn’t do the exact same thing. If he could protect all of them, he would. “Why don’t you get dried off and dressed? I’m going to call Mary and see if I can get some help from the other me about who hangs out at Sangre. We can shortlist as much as we can then.” Jesse silently held his hand out, his fingers closing around Gideon’s as he helped him to his feet. Maybe Jesse was just tired, but Gideon noticed he didn’t attempt to turn away from Gideon’s eyes, or immediately cover himself. “What should I focus on?” Rest, Gideon wanted to say. Instead, he offered, “Make up a list of everybody you remember from the club. I know you don’t know names on most of them, but write descriptions. 186

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Any little thing. We’ll have that to cross-reference what the other me gives us.” Jesse smiled. “I don’t know how much I’ll actually be able to remember. I was pretty distracted most of the time.” Gideon retreated for the door, leaving Jesse to finish drying off. “Focus on the second half of the night when we were hanging at the bar. At least you were vertical then.” The sound of Jesse’s chuckle warmed him as Gideon went to call Mary. It was the single best sound he had heard in six months.

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CHAPTER 14 Michelle checked her watch again, even though she knew precisely what time it was. She had plans besides babysitting Jesse and Gideon on their way back to their own dimension, and their tardiness was severely fucking up those plans. A part of her wanted to go look for them, but if they were only very late, and she wasn’t here when they arrived, everything would be ruined anyway. So she stayed put, counting the lost seconds and minutes until the area behind her eyes began to ache. Jesse had seemed like a smart boy. Smart enough to understand what would happen if they missed the rendezvous time. But then, he seemed utterly devoted to that damned vampire, so how smart 188

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could he possibly be? Michelle knew one thing—she would not be cleaning up their mess. They had promised to keep up their side of the deal. They had promised to leave when it was time to leave. Of course, she did consider the fact that they were dead, but in that case, there would be no mess to clean up. And if they were merely injured? They should have tried to reach her. She paced, watching the very fabric of the dimension begin to wear thin and fade. The spell was beginning. She checked her watch again. They had two minutes. Two minutes to avoid the biggest fuck-up of their existence. Michelle did not have a lot of hope. *

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It had been the longest week of Emma’s life. Longer than the time she had spent imprisoned in Andre’s house, wondering if she was going to become one of the living art arrangements or something worse. Longer than the days Jesse had been missing in New York, when she and Gideon had ransacked the city looking for him, fearing the worst. Even knowing where they were or what they were doing didn’t help, for a whole host of reasons. She just wanted them back. She didn’t care anymore about why they had left. Her bed was cold, and her heart ached, and all she wanted was to be able to hold onto Jesse and Gideon again and never let go. Emma shivered against the cold, wrapping her arms more tightly around her. Michelle stood in the middle of the 189

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abandoned street, mouth firm, eyes intent. Her attention was fixed on the spot Gideon and Jesse had disappeared from five days earlier. Everywhere else, the world looked normal, but in the circle she had inscribed on the concrete, appearances had changed. There was almost a line of demarcation, where a building on the opposite side of the street was solid on one side, and translucent on the other. Like someone had taken it and erased half of its substance. An effect of opening the portal to the other dimension, but it was still eerie, all the same. “How much longer?” Emma called out. The first time Michelle had done this, the portal had only been open for seconds. And Emma hadn’t been paying any attention to the portal itself. She had been too busy staring as Jesse and Gideon simply disappeared. She had never quite understood what it meant to vanish into thin air until Jesse and Gideon literally seemed to do just that. But now, she had the chance to stare into another dimension as the forms there began to take shape and come into focus. She didn’t pay any attention to what she saw, straining to pick out the familiar shapes of Jesse and Gideon. “Michelle?” “They should be here now.” But there wasn’t anything else there. Maybe she had the wrong angle to actually see anything. Ignoring Michelle’s warning to stay on the sidewalk, Emma made a wide circle around the portal until she stood directly behind Michelle. The distortion was greater here, and 190

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she saw exactly what Michelle did. The other Chicago had a clear sky, the clouds that covered this one tonight absent, and there were cars parked along the curb that were missing from this street. The rest of the street was deserted, however. No people walking the sidewalk. No Gideon and Jesse racing to meet their destination. “Did we get the time wrong?” “No, we did not.” Michelle’s voice was strained, her words running together. Emma glanced over, and in the orange light, she saw deep lines around Michelle’s eyes and mouth. “Thirty more seconds. That’s it.” Panic rose like bile in her throat. “What do you mean, that’s it? They’re not here!” “Twenty more seconds.” The panic increased, choking her. She wanted to demand an explanation. She felt each second crawl across her skin. “Ten seconds.” Ten made her blood roar. Nine made her chest tighten. Eight made her breath catch. Seven, six, and five would have been a blur if she wasn’t staring so intently at the empty space in front of Michelle, waiting for something—anything—to appear. Four felt her stomach heave. Three flashed by with images of Jesse hanging twisted and broken from chains in a ceiling, with a pile of ash at his feet and a laughing Brooker with a stake in his hand at his side. Two disappeared with a shiver. 191

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And one… One came. Stretched. Froze. Disappeared. The portal closed with a pop, and Michelle sagged. “I’m sorry, Emma.” Sorry? No. There wasn’t any reason to be sorry. “That can’t be it. They’re not here. We have to try again.” “It’s not as easy as just flinging open a door, Emma. I kept this portal viable as long as I could. If I try again…things could go very wrong.” “I don’t care.” She rushed forward, heedless of whatever magic Michelle had put into place. “Something’s wrong. It has to be. They wouldn’t mess this up.” “If there is something wrong, there’s nothing we can do about it.” Emma stared at her in disbelief. “You can’t believe that. If they’re hurt, they need our help. More than ever.” “I am not sending you into that dimension. Period. In fact, I’ve probably already done too much damage.” “So you’ll just leave them there?” She knew Michelle didn’t give a damn about Gideon, but she had seemed honestly concerned about Jesse. The grim set of Michelle’s mouth answered the question for her, however, and Emma knew she had to try a different tactic. “What if the reason they couldn’t come back was because of your other self? Could that be a possibility?” “She would not interfere with this. The consequences could be too catastrophic. Emma, I know you think losing the 192

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two of them could be the worst possible outcome here, but it’s not. Nobody is supposed to fuck with dimensional portals. Not even me.” No, to Michelle, losing them would be far from the worst possible outcome. She might care for Jesse, but she cared about her duties far, far more. “Gideon tried fucking with them before, though,” Emma said. “If they just got held up and missed their window, don’t you think he’d try to do something to get them home? Can you risk that?” “For his sake, I hope he doesn’t. The Michelle in that dimension will stop him, one way or the other. Emma, they both understood how this worked. I’m not going to risk destroying the very fabric of the dimension because they couldn’t be where they needed to be. Do you want to be responsible for ending life as we know it? Look, we can try to find another way to get them out of the dimension. But I’m not making any promises. And it’s possible we could find a way that you won’t like.” Her blood ran cold. “What do you mean?” “I mean that your boys royally fucked up, and it’s not going to be easy to clean up this mess. It’d serve them right if we just left them there.” “No.” She said it even more force than she felt, taking both of them by surprise. Michelle’s brows quirked, but she didn’t say a word. “I am not giving up on them. For all we know, they’re hurt, and if you think for a second I’m going to turn my back on them, you don’t know me at all.” 193

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“Yes, that’s why I said we can look into finding another way. But again, I’m not making any promises.” Emma stuffed her hands in her pockets. It was the best she was going to get from Michelle. Any other circumstances and she might not have put up so much of a fight, but this was Gideon and Jesse they were talking about. If the situation was reversed, she knew for a fact they would move heaven and earth to find her if they had to. The least she could do was the same. Michelle looked tired, and Emma slipped an arm around her waist, helping support her weight as they headed back to the sidewalk. “Do you need to rest first? Should we go back to the bookstore?” “Yes. We won’t be able to start until tomorrow morning. I’m tired and the damage I’ve done to the dimension with the portal needs time to heal.” “What kind of damage have you done?” “What if I ripped open your skin so I could get a good look at what’s on the other side? It’s not much different than that.” “So nothing that’s going to affect Gideon and Jesse directly?” “I don’t know, Emma. I was positive I could keep everything together and everybody safe with a limit of five days. Now that the window is closed, I don’t know what’s going to happen.” She knew Michelle was tired of her questions, but until she had answers, Emma wasn’t going to stop. In fact, she wasn’t going to stop until Gideon and Jesse were safely home. 194

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She just hoped that they were all right. If it turned out they flaunted Michelle’s strict instructions for no good reason, there would be hell to pay. *

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By the time they ventured out of their apartment for Mary’s, Jesse felt pretty good. Once he had made up his mind to stay in this dimension, he didn’t dwell on the decision again. There was nothing to dwell on. They couldn’t take it back, and Jesse didn’t think he could make any other choice, given the information he had. Gideon might be driven by the desire to save Mary, but Jesse knew he could never leave Gideon—any Gideon—in danger. He also felt fine physically. Gideon had made him rest, and he had been a little sore when he woke up, but it wasn’t unpleasant. In fact, his memories of Sangre were decidedly pleasant. As were the dreams he had as a result of their trip to the club. But he didn’t have time to dwell on that. Just because they no longer had a looming deadline didn’t mean they had time to waste. Jesse had no intention of staying in the strange dimension indefinitely. They were going to solve this problem and then find a way home. His good feelings faded, however, when Mary opened her apartment door after Gideon knocked. Her face had been pleasant, but it clouded over as soon as she saw them. Jesse took an involuntary step back. “What are you two doing here?” Gideon stuffed his hands in his pockets, squaring his 195

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shoulders in light of her sharp tone. “I told you this morning on the phone we needed more details on the list we made. Since you can’t give them to us, that leaves only one alternative. And last I heard, you still had me in bed.” Jesse bit back the automatic impulse to correct him, but Mary didn’t seem to notice Gideon’s explanation at all. “You should have been back in your own dimension. You were going back tonight.” “Yeah, well, change of plan.” Gideon made to push past Mary to get inside, but she refused to move, blocking the entrance. He drew up short, apparently unwilling to go the extra step to get her out of his way. “Look, we’re here, okay? We missed the train home. So let’s just move on, and find these vamps who are after me before they realize there are actually two of me around.” “And what about you?” It took Jesse a few seconds to realize she was addressing him. “What about me?” “This isn’t a safe place for you. You should be home. Your home.” “We made this choice together,” Gideon intervened. “We’re not going anywhere until we know both of you are safe.” “And what about the both of you? Marcus told me what happened last night. How the two of you were attacked. And Jesse…where did you take him?” “Mary, please. Gideon is right. We made this decision together. We know what we’re doing.” 196

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Gideon lifted an arm and braced himself against the doorjamb, leaning in to speak in a lower tone to Mary. It blocked her off partially from Jesse’s view, but he’d spent far too many years being aware of everything Gideon said and did not to hear what he said now. “Think about it for a second,” he murmured to her. “Think about how you felt when you saw me at the church. Think about how you were ready to turn this city upside down for me. How long have we been together here? Two years? Same with me and Jess. And he worked for me for years before that. Do you honestly think he could walk away when we’re so close to stopping this?” He paused, and ducked his head even further. “Do you honestly think I could walk away from helping you at this point?” Mary took a step back and folded her arms. “Fine. But I still think you staying here was a bad idea. Gideon is awake. He’s also feeling better now, so don’t be surprised if he insists on taking a more active role.” Gideon nodded and began walking toward the bedroom. His stride was purposeful, like nothing could distract him from his goal. Jesse followed a few feet behind, not sure if he was ready to see both versions of the same man in the same room. Mary caught his arm before he could get far. “Are you sure you’re okay?” “I’m fine. I’ll be better when we figure out who is behind all of this.” Mary studied him for a few moments then shut the door behind him. 197

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CHAPTER 15 There was something infinitely surreal about spending the night arguing with yourself. Especially with the woman who changed your life hovering in the background and the man who’d changed it yet again sitting at your side. Gideon took comfort in the way Jesse kept pressing his thigh against his, as if to reinforce that contact between them. He didn’t take comfort in the cunning gleam that showed in his other self’s eyes every time Jesse did that, however, and he especially didn’t take comfort in how Jesse couldn’t hide his concern every time his other self exaggerated his injuries. Mary’s declaration about how he was doing better was an understatement. The other Gideon could probably have gone 198

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out for a light hunt, and only felt the slightest of strains. Still, his contributions to the list were helpful. Over the course of the night, they were able to narrow the possibilities to at least six names, and a half dozen others who merited further investigation. In Gideon’s mind, it was worth the choice to stay. At four, he rose from his chair and stretched, deliberately twisting in a way he knew his other self couldn’t do just yet without pain. “Not bad. We might actually get this bastard tomorrow night now.” Jesse looked less than certain, but he merely inclined his head in silent agreement. Mary glanced at the vampire on the bed. “Between the four of us and Hal, we’ll definitely put a dent in the list.” Gideon frowned. “Is that such a good idea? If there are two of me spotted tomorrow night, the truth is going to come out.” “So maybe you don’t go storming the castle with both stakes blazing,” his other self commented. “I don’t blaze.” The other Gideon glanced at Jesse, letting his gaze sweep over him. Only a single, drawled word came out of his mouth. “Right.” Jesse ignored the exchange and addressed Mary. “That is a good point, though. Right now, it would probably be best to keep the situation a secret.” He glanced over to the two vampires. “Really, only one of you should go out at a time.” Gideon smirked and folded his arms over his chest. “And seeing as how I’m not the one with his ass glued to a bed, I 199

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guess it’s going to be me.” “I’m still going out with Hal,” Mary said. “I’m not going to leave all the fun to you two.” The other Gideon opened his mouth to protest, but Mary put a hand up, cutting him off. “We’ll only go out during the day, if you’re going to be a baby about it. But I want to do something.” He frowned at the same time his other self did. Neither one of them liked the idea of Mary going out to deal with any of this, but both knew that arguing with her would be pointless. She’d do exactly what she wanted, regardless of what they said. Sometimes, she was too headstrong for her own good. “Let me look at that list again,” he said. “We’ll divvy it up.” Jesse offered the notepad, and Gideon scanned it over, the lines deepening in his brow with each name. He didn’t want her going after any of them, truth be told. Jesse moved closer, looking at the list over Gideon’s shoulder. “It’d be a good idea to give her something,” he murmured. “There’s a lot of ground to cover.” “Well, not these two.” He pointed at the first names. One was a bitchy blonde his other self had finally admitted to staking some of her minions, who’d given him the evil eye all night at Sangre. The other was a lean and mean vamp who had ploughed into Jesse before he’d finally come. Gideon had carefully left out that particular fact when they had been going over the list earlier. Jesse pointed to the list. “What about her?” Gideon shook his head. The vampire in question was too 200

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old and strong. “Her?” Gideon shook his head again. That one liked weapons, and would no doubt be armed with several guns, and maybe even explosives. “Him?” The new name wasn’t even an option. He had made an offer to buy Jesse at the club, and not a particularly generous one, and he had been pretty upset when Gideon shut him down. Jesse sighed. “You want to take care of this entire list yourself, don’t you?” “No—” “Of course, he does.” His other self held out his hand. “Give it here. I’ll pick out who Mary goes after tomorrow. I’m the one who knows these people, after all.” Gideon’s eyes narrowed, but he rounded the corner of the bed anyway. If he didn’t agree, he’d just protest. After all, he was the mobile one here. He held out the notepad. As the other Gideon reached to take it, however, their fingers brushed, and an electric shock jumped between them. Gideon dropped the pad, yanking his hand away. “Son of a bitch!” “What happened?” From Mary. “Oh shit.” From Jesse. Before Gideon realized what was happening, Jesse jumped forward and batted the smoking notepad off the bed and the 201

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sharp smell of smoke assaulted his nose. The blanket on the bed was singed, and the paper at his feet was already in flames. Mary jumped forward and stomped on the pad, while Jesse smothered the few sparks still on the bed. “What the hell was that?” Gideon demanded. His fingers were singed. Sucking on them filled his mouth with the taste of something metallic, something he didn’t recognize. “I guess you do blaze a little bit,” Jesse muttered. “I don’t suppose you’d be willing to see if it happens a second time.” The other Gideon snorted at Jesse’s joke, but Gideon glared at Jess. “No, I wouldn’t be willing. He shocked me. That’s all.” Jesse shuffled his feet on the carpet quickly, then touched Gideon’s bare hand. A small spark of static electricity jumped between them, but Gideon hardly felt it. “That’s a little shock. You two started a fire.” “And ruined our list,” Mary added. “It wasn’t me,” the other Gideon said. “It was him.” “Right. Because I’ve got a fire fetish.” Gideon rolled his eyes. “That makes a lot of sense.” “Well, something caused it. And I’m the one who’s been in this bed all night, remember?” Mary rolled her eyes. Jesse cursed under his breath, “Oh, for God’s sake.” Jesse took Gideon’s uninjured hand and pulled it the short distance that separated him from the other vampire. His fingertips brushed Gideon’s shoulder, and another jolt flowed up his arm. 202

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“Well…that’s very interesting,” Jesse said, the light in his eyes enough to convince Gideon he intended to perform the experiment again. Gideon yanked his hand away, stepping back from the bed. “I think that’s enough. We’re already set the paper on fire. The last thing we need to do is torch the bed.” For once, his other self didn’t give him any shit. “Agreed. We got the message. No touchy-feely.” “So what is going on?” Mary asked, taking her Gideon’s hand and studying his fingers. “This didn’t happen before, when he helped move you from the church.” “You mean, it didn’t happen before we missed our date with Michelle,” Jesse said softly. Gideon froze. She’d warned them about fucking with dimensions. Michelle back home had been adamant that five days was the most time she could give them. She’d been stingy with the details of why, other than to say it would be bad for the dimension, but Gideon had just assumed that was because she didn’t trust him. He held his tongue from blaming Michelle, however. Jesse wouldn’t like it. “I guess that means we’ll have to work harder,” he said. “The sooner we get this done, the sooner we can go home.” Jesse picked the half-ruined notepad off the floor. “Besides the two of you being touchy-feely, I wonder what else we should avoid?” He passed the pad to the other Gideon. “After all, I’m not supposed to be in this dimension at all.” Before Gideon could do anything, his other self grabbed 203

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Jesse’s wrist, tightening his fingers around it. Nothing happened, except for the sudden jump in Jesse’s pulse. “Guess that means you’re not in any risk,” the other Gideon said. “No,” Gideon growled. “That just means you still like to fuck around with people. Let him go.” He was saved from another inferno when Jesse easily pulled away. The other Gideon grinned. “Lighten up. It’s not like it’s your ass they’re after.” “It was my ass that got attacked last night, though.” “Can we not do this?” Mary stepped between them, and as if it was a conditioned response, both Gideons fell silent. Once she was sure she had the control, she turned to Jesse. “Since we don’t know what the effect you might have on anything, maybe you should just let us handle the legwork.” Gideon brightened. “Yes. I like that plan.” Jesse spun to face him. “What? Why? I’m the only one in this room who hasn’t been attacked or targeted for attack….in this dimension.” “Because they know you now. If they followed us, they saw you with me, and they didn’t have any qualms attacking Mary, now did they?” “The problem with your brilliant plan is that it’s going to take all of us to figure out what’s going on and fix this,” Jesse shot back. He didn’t want to do this in front of Mary, and definitely not in front of his other self. This was a fight that would likely last for hours; at least, that’s what experience dictated. 204

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His mouth was open to say just that to Jesse when Gideon stopped. Jesse was arguing with him. Jesse was protesting about being protected. Jesse hadn’t done that for six months. Consciously, Gideon unfolded his arms. “We’ll just have to be careful with you, then.” He took mild pleasure in the surprise in everybody’s faces. “When we get back to the other apartment, we’ll talk about specifics. We don’t need to waste any more time here. I’m sure Mary probably wants to get some sleep if she wants to get anything done today.” The surprise didn’t fade from Jesse’s face. “Yeah, you’re probably right. We need to leave before the sun comes up, anyway.” He checked his watch. “Which would be in about twenty minutes.” “Let’s go then.” He was already headed for the door. Twenty minutes wasn’t very much time at all. “I’ll call you when we get there, Mary.” “Wait a second!” They paused at the sound of the other vampire’s voice. “Who’s going to do this list over?” “We’ll get it done,” Mary said, sitting on the edge of the bed. “I’ll give it to Gideon when he lets us know they got home okay.” “So we’ve got the seven names, right?” Gideon frowned at his other self’s question. “No. There were six.” He rattled off the names. “Well, there should be seven,” the other Gideon said. “Because even if you didn’t see him, Henry doesn’t miss a 205

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night since he bought into the place.” “He was probably upstairs, wasn’t he?” Jesse shook his head. “He probably noticed you as soon as we walked in.” Jesse had a point, but Gideon leveled a stare at the bed. “I never had any problems with Henry. What have you done to him that he might do something like this?” “I haven’t. But I haven’t done anything to anyone else on that list, either.” “You didn’t have any problems with Henry…until you had to stake him,” Jesse pointed out. “I don’t see why he would be any different in this dimension.” “Eighteen minutes,” Mary reminded. “Argue about this later.” Gideon nodded. “She’s right. Let’s go.” Jesse followed him out of the apartment, his eyes thoughtful. Gideon recognized all the signs of Jesse mulling over a problem, teasing out a problem, and he decided to let him think in silence. He focused on driving through the predawn streets, and they reached their building with three minutes to spare. The hair on the back of his neck stood on end, and he could feel the heat of the rising sun before they ducked through the dark doorway. “So are we really going to work out the specifics of a compromise, or were you just trying to avoid…a scene?” Gideon waited until they were both inside the apartment before grabbing Jesse’s shoulder and pushing him into the closed door. Jess tensed for a moment, until Gideon ground his rising erection into Jesse’s hip. 206

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“I didn’t really feel like giving them a floor show.” He leaned in and inhaled the scent of Jesse’s neck, letting his tongue dart out to taste his freshest bite marks. “You haven’t argued with me about wanting to protect you in months.” “I…just want to help.” He sighed. “Christ, it’s hard to think when you do that.” The darkness hid his smile, though he knew Jess probably felt it. “Maybe that’s my grand plan.” He caressed Jesse’s waist, pulling at his shirt until he felt hot skin. “It’s not like we can do anything during the day anyway. And maybe I’m feeling the need to mark what’s mine.” “Gideon, I think…” Gideon licked the fresh mark again, pressing his tongue against Jesse’s sensitive skin. Jesse dropped his head back against the door as he gripped Gideon’s hips. “Okay, I think you should keep doing that.” “What? This?” He let his fangs descend so that they pricked the small holes. With his free hand, he fisted Jesse’s hair and pulled just hard enough to the side for the muscles to stand out. The details of the list were still in the back of his mind, but there was nothing they could do until the sun set anyway. If they were lucky, Mary and Hal would determine which vampire would be their target. In the meantime, he might as well let Jesse know how pleased he was that he was feeling stronger. Jesse’s breath came faster, hot and wispy across Gideon’s face. The fingers on Gideon’s hips tightened, digging into his flesh through his pants. Jesse’s pulse hammered against his thin skin, almost taunting Gideon, teasing him into sinking his 207

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teeth into Jesse’s flesh. “Yes, more of that.” Gideon moved his mouth in fractions of an inch, back and forth, letting the tips of his fangs catch at random intervals, and beads of blood welled to the surface. It was as much a torture for him as it was for Jesse, but he wasn’t ready to have this be over so swiftly. He wanted Jesse to feel like his heart was going to explode out of his chest in anticipation of the impending bite. He wanted to smell the pre-come leaking from Jesse’s hard cock. As soon as he was done drinking his sweet blood, Gideon would sink to his knees and swallow Jesse’s length down, too. “Gideon…” Jesse shifted his weight, pushing his erection against Gideon. He moaned softly at the contact and did it again, but Gideon tightened his grip, forcing him to remain still so he couldn’t move a third time. He skimmed his mouth over the fresh marks, collecting the tiny drops of blood, letting each one stain his lips. He loved the way Jesse tasted, loved the way his blood seemed to get warmer and sweeter the more aroused Jesse became. “Gideon…please…” “Please what?” He reached between their bodies, and though he felt Jesse’s pulse pound faster, he kept his hand turned away, opening up his own fly so that the wet tip of his cock became visible. Though Jesse’s lashes lowered in order to watch Gideon stroke himself, he remained otherwise still. “I could do this all night,” he murmured. Fresh blood dripped from the small holes, and he shuddered as he licked 208

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them away. Well. Maybe not all night. He didn’t have that much restraint. Jesse lifted his hand like he intended to grasp Gideon’s cock, but he merely hovered there for a moment. “Please, bite me. I want…I want to feel that, Gideon. Please.” “Didn’t I just bite you?” The tip of his tongue teased one of the punctures. “These taste fresh to me.” “They are…you did. Deeper, please. Harder.” Gideon growled. Reaching for Jesse’s hand, he brought it back to his cock, forcing Jess to start stroking. “Sure about that? Because I might take that as an invitation to split you open once I’ve drunk my fill.” Jesse stripped his cock again and again, his hand hot, his palm slick with pre-come. “I know. I’m sure, Gideon, please.” The need in Jesse’s voice hooked straight into Gideon’s gut and pulled him down to the straining sinew. He clamped his mouth slightly off the original marks and sucked at the muscle, feeling the blood rush to the surface, waiting and waiting until it felt like the skin would burst. Only then did he shift his jaw, bearing his fangs down until they pierced Jesse’s neck. But he didn’t stop at the first taste of blood. He drove deeper as Jesse had begged, until there was no more room to go, the flow now a scorching gush flooding across his tongue. They both groaned at the same time. Jesse’s hand quickened on Gideon’s cock, his breath coming in a continual stream of moans. His body tensed, straining toward Gideon, as if he couldn’t stand to have even 209

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half an inch between them. Gideon let the blood flow down his throat, feeling warmer and harder with each slow pull. Jesse’s moans began to shift, turning into soft words of encouragement. Gideon’s head swam. Nobody tasted as good as Jesse, nobody was as satisfying, but this bordered on sublime as the blood saturated his hungered senses. Though he’d never stopped biting Jesse after the incident, he’d never pushed it, either. Now, his restraint shattered. He wanted to glut himself on Jesse’s essence, feel his heart flutter before finally stopping. By the time he finished, he wanted both of them to be so shaken from the feeding that they would have no other choice but to fall to the floor right there so Gideon could bury his cock in Jesse’s tight ass. Gideon listened to every single change in Jesse’s breathing. Jesse’s heart pounded, echoing through Gideon’s chest. His wrist began to slow, but he didn’t stop whispering Gideon’s name, didn’t stop asking for more. But he felt the telltale flutter in Jesse’s chest, and knew he had to stop. He retracted his fangs and licked the mark until the swell of blood stopped, but he still didn’t have enough of Jesse’s taste. His mouth descended on Jesse’s, his fangs cutting into Jesse’s lips, spilling more blood against Gideon’s tongue. Wrapping one arm around Jesse’s waist and his other hand around the fingers on his shaft, Gideon guided him deeper into the apartment, stopping as soon as the back of his legs hit the nearest chair. He sank backward, pulling Jesse on top of him, all the while never ceasing the sweeping kisses that fused their mouths together. 210

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CHAPTER 16 Despite desire to stay in bed, Jesse crept out of the apartment while Gideon was still sleeping off the effects of glutting himself on blood and what seemed like hours of fucking. Jesse had debated waking him, but ultimately decided to return before Gideon woke up. He needed to speak to Michelle. And he needed to confirm his suspicious about Henry. Maybe he had an irrational hatred for the man since he wanted to skin Jesse alive with a whip during the obsidian incident, but Jesse thought the chances were equally good that Henry was a trouble-maker in this and every dimension. Jesse’s hand kept drifting to his neck as he walked, and every time his fingers touched the bite mark there, he 211

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shivered, down to the balls of his feet. If he applied a little bit of pressure, his stomach did a slow somersault, and his groin tightened. It had hurt when Gideon bit him—it had been painful. A vampire bite was always a little painful, but Gideon usually waited until Jesse’s body was flooded with endorphins, his blood and heart racing. Jesse normally didn’t even feel the initial bite, and each pull of blood after that would only heighten his light-headed pleasure until he couldn’t speak. But a bite by itself was different. It was the sort of pain that Jesse usually shied away from these days. The sort of pain that could trigger unpleasant memories and make him weak and scared and tired. The sort of pain that, just a little over six months ago, he would have begged for, on his hands and knees if Gideon demanded it. And maybe even if he didn’t. But when Gideon bit him that morning, it just felt good. Like Jesse remembered. The hard press of sharp fangs, and then the unmistakable sensation of being consumed. It should have been frightening, but it wasn’t. Instead of terrifying him, it only made him crave more. The arrival at Michelle’s shop pulled him from his thoughts. It might have been a trick of the midday sun, but as he approached, the small building seemed to shimmer and fade. Jesse stopped short outside the door, remembering the way Gideon had almost set himself on fire with a simple touch. He didn’t want to touch the door that was almost, but not quite, there. Before he could gather the nerve to open the door—or at 212

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least knock—it flew open, revealing a very angry Michelle. “Get away from here.” “But…” “Get away from here, right now.” She took his shoulders and walked him several feet down the block. “Where were you? Didn’t I tell you not to miss the chance to go home?” “We needed to stay.” “No, you didn’t.” She was still gripping him, still pushing him backward, and Jesse twisted away from her. “We haven’t found the source of the danger yet.” “So what? Do you realize what you’ve done? You don’t belong here. You’re wrong. And the dimension will do everything it can to expel you, or kill you.” Jesse frowned. “What do you mean, kill me?” “It means I won’t let you destroy this dimension.” Jesse stared at her. “Are you threatening me?” “No. I’m telling you that you better find a way home before it’s too late. Don’t act so surprised. You had enough warning. You knew you were taking a risk.” “You won’t help us find a way home?” “Don’t come back here again. My shop is on a weak point in the dimension. For your own safety, I’d suggest staying away.” “My safety? From the dimensional weakness, or from you?” “Find a way home, Jesse.” Michelle turned down the road, and Jesse considered 213

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stopping her to demand more answers, but the vision of Michelle snapping his neck was enough to hold him back. He tried to tell himself that it wasn’t personal, that his friend didn’t really want to kill him. She warned him, after all. She was giving him a chance to fix things. Surely that meant she didn’t really want to hurt him? Jesse remembered his second goal for the day, but he didn’t know where to go or what to do. In fact, he wasn’t sure where to go, or what to do for anything. His life had been threatened in many ways by many people over the years, but this rattled him to his core. Finally, he picked a direction and began walking. He traveled several blocks before he realized he was moving further from their apartment and closer to Mary’s church. He didn’t have any more answers by the time he reached the front door, but when he moved to open it, he hesitated. There was no guarantee that Mary or Hal were even here. In fact, odds were very good that he was going to run into Marcus again. This was where he worked, after all. Did he want that? Was he prepared for it? He suspected not. His hand strayed to his neck. Just the simple touch gave him courage, and he swallowed down a brief swell of panic to pull the door open. The warm interior wrapped around him. With his steps echoing in the empty entryway, Jesse moved into the main room, aware of the distant murmur of voices. Mary and Hal knelt at the front, large sheets of paper spread around them as they discussed something between themselves. Every once in 214

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a while, Mary would point at something on the papers, and Hal would nod, then it would be his turn, with her agreement following. The familiarity of their friendship, of how closely they were working on some agenda, struck a chord deep inside Jesse. It felt like any number of times he had worked with Gideon, or he and Emma had fathomed out a problem, or even discussing a case with Derek. This was his milieu, even if the church wasn’t a familiar setting. There was no reason for him to be frightened. Then Mary glanced up. When her gaze found him, she smiled. “You’re not doing anybody any good all the way back there,” she said. “Come on up.” Jesse pushed the meeting with Michelle out of his mind. It wouldn’t do any good to dwell on it. He had a job to do. “What have you got there?” he asked as he approached. “Street maps of Chicago.” She edged to the side to give him room to kneel down next to her and pointed out the various red dots marked across the familiar streets. “After you left this morning, Gideon and I thought it might be a good idea to see if there are any weird things on around town, stuff that might be linked to these attacks. So we spent the morning hitting all our contacts.” “We’re looking for a pattern in them now,” Hal added. Jesse nodded and knelt on the floor beside Mary. This was Gideon’s favorite technique as well, and after years of practice, Jesse knew what to look for. It only took a few 215

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moments to spot the pattern he was looking for—the pattern a part of him had expected to see. “Is there a warehouse here?” Jesse asked, pointing to a spot on the map where several red dots were clustered. Both Hal and Mary craned their necks in order to better see where he was indicating. “A new one, I think,” Mary said. “Why? Is that a problem area in your dimension?” “Some…weird things have happened there.” To put it mildly, Jesse thought. The memory of the first night they discovered the obsidian still had the power to leave him a little breathless. “It’s an area worth investigating, I think.” Hal picked up a list that had been resting on his other side and scanned it quickly. “That was where those dead teenagers were found. The ones that looked like a sacrifice.” Mary frowned. “Gideon’s not going to like that.” To Jesse, “He said after you guys left that he was sorry for bringing up Henry in the first place. He doesn’t think he’s the one.” “Did he say why he didn’t think Henry could be the one?” “Because Henry’s small potatoes. He just bought into that club, sure, but he’s been around long enough to know that Gideon’s got power in the vampire world. He doesn’t think Henry’s stupid enough to try and make a play for more yet.” “I think Gideon might not know Henry as well as he thinks he does,” Jesse murmured. He looked to the block surrounding Sangre. There were five red dots, but they were not in a cluster. They could have been random, but Jesse suspected otherwise. “What about these? What weird things happened here?” 216

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Hal referred to his list again. “Some savage attacks, more violent than usual. People left in pieces. And one was a rape. A vampire friend of Gideon’s.” Jesse nodded. “Gideon can be really stubborn at times. If he doesn’t want to believe Henry is behind this, he’s going to think of a million excuses why he’s right and we’re wrong.” “You really think it’s Henry?” Mary asked. “I think he’s the number one suspect on this list, honestly. We’ve had problems with Henry before.” “Right. You mentioned Gideon staked him.” “Yeah, he did. And that was over a power play, too. Henry knows he’s small potatoes. He’s doesn’t intend to stay that way. Gideon and I can look into this tonight.” Mary sat back on her heels, her gaze growing thoughtful. “I’m surprised he let you out today. From the way he was acting, I thought he’d have you tied to the bed until sunset.” “He…didn’t exactly let me out of the apartment. I left while he was sleeping.” Her brows shot up. “Tell me you at least left a note.” “I planned to be back before he woke up.” Jesse pushed himself to his feet. “Which means I better get moving. I think we’ll probably come by tonight and get the map.” Mary rose as well and walked with him back to the front of the church. “What about the effects of missing your way home last night?” she asked. “Have you figured out what dangers there are to you?” “You could say that.” Jesse debated how much he should reveal, but decided there was no good reason to keep secrets. 217

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She deserved to know how pressing things were. “Michelle…warned me that we better find a way home, because we don’t belong here. She also helpfully added she’ll get rid of us before she lets the dimension be harmed.” “Get rid…” Her eyes widened. “She’d kill you? She wouldn’t do that. I mean, I can see her killing Gideon, because of their history and all, but you’re not a vampire. You’re harmless.” As soon as the word came out of her mouth, she grimaced. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean that the way it sounded.” “It’s okay. I could be as harmless as a fly. That’s not going to make a difference to Michelle if my presence here is enough to destroy the dimension and life as you know it. She didn’t tell me how much time we have, but I’d say not too much.” “So how do we get you back?” “I don’t know. But since we’ve apparently fucked everything up here, we better make it worth it. I’m going to focus on Henry for now.” Mary didn’t look satisfied with the answer, but Jesse ducked out of the church before she could argue with him. He hurried down the street, though he thought the information he had about Henry might placate Gideon if he woke up alone. If that failed, Jesse could always distract him with Michelle’s threat. Either way, Gideon would have too much to worry about to focus on Jesse’s short disappearance. *

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straight to sleep, too exhausted from the efforts of peeling apart the dimensions to do any of the research Emma wanted. That left her on her own, flying blind, with absolutely nothing to show for it by the time Michelle rose midday. She made Michelle coffee and something to eat, hoping that when she was done, Michelle would announce she had an idea. She didn’t. And now they were both buried in books, trying to find a solution. “Maybe it’s not something you can do,” Emma said. It wouldn’t hurt to test the waters about John. If anything, it might get them thinking on a different track. “Is there any other kind of magic that might work?” “If you’re talking about dark magic, I must remind you that my entire existence is dedicated to making sure people don’t use dark magic to punch through dimensional walls.” For a moment, Emma understood perfectly why Gideon could get so frustrated with Michelle. “What about other hotspots, then? You picked that empty street for a reason, didn’t you?” “There are other hotspots. But we have to wait a little while before I can open another portal. If we do that, you will not have five days to find them and bring them back. You might not even have one whole day.” “So that means we just have to pick a spot near where they’re going to be. Or where they could be.” “Not pick, Emma. Find.” She frowned. “You don’t know where they are?” “The walls between dimensions are…fluid. The weak 219

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spots change. Sometimes they heal quickly, sometimes they take longer. They can move as the walls themselves move. I try to keep track of them as much as I can, but it’s not an exact science.” “How do you track them? Is it something I can help with?” Maybe her empathic abilities would help here. She might be of use after all. “Magic, mostly.” Michelle frowned thoughtfully. “But we need to be very precise. I can find weak spots, but you can help me find the best ones to use. The areas where the walls are the thinnest. With concentration, you should be able to feel people on the other side in those spots.” Emma brightened. “So let’s do that. Do you need for me to go shopping or anything for what you do?” “No, I need you to get some rest. If you’re dead on your feet, you’ll be no use to me. There’s nothing we can do right now, anyway. When you wake up, we’ll figure out where we’re going to start looking for the best weak spot.” Setting aside her book, Emma rose to her feet, swaying slightly once she was upright. Michelle was right. She wasn’t going to be any good to anyone if she didn’t sleep. And she refused to fail Jesse and Gideon now. They needed her. She was sure of it.

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CHAPTER 17 Jesse hesitated outside the closed apartment door, listening for any signs of movement. Everything was silent. Relieved, he let himself in to the apartment, only to stop short. Gideon was standing in the center of the room, his eyes flashing, and every line of his body bespoke of a tense anger. If Jesse didn’t know better, he’d almost think it was the other Gideon waiting for him. His earlier hope of explaining everything before Gideon became upset completely vanished. “You’re not dead.” “No. Alive and well.” “Not that I would have known.” “I’m sorry. I just wanted to go and see Michelle.” 221

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He didn’t see Gideon move. The air knocked from Jesse’s lungs as Gideon shoved him back to the wall, fingers pinching into the sinew of his shoulder where Gideon had him pinned. Gold glinted in Gideon’s eyes, but it was the thin line of his lip, barely hiding the tip of a fang that obviously wanted to fully descend, that made Jess freeze. “Sometimes, you can be a real self-centered son of a bitch, you know that?” Jesse tried to swallow, but his throat refused to cooperate, and his tongue felt thick and dry. He had come to know a great deal about terror in the past half year, and the sudden fear crawling down his spine had a different sort of quality than he was used to. “I’m really sorry, Gideon. I didn’t mean…” The words were cut off by another push. He didn’t think it was possible to get any closer to the wall. “You didn’t mean to scare the shit out of me? You didn’t mean for me to ever find out? You didn’t mean to forget I’d wake up, find you gone, and immediately jump to what it was like not being able to find you in New York?” Gideon leaned until their noses were almost touching. “You can’t honestly think waltzing in here and saying, ‘Gee, Gideon, I’m sorry for ripping your heart out,’ makes any fucking difference at all, can you?” Jesse didn’t know why he didn’t take the time to leave a note. Why he didn’t take the time to wake Gideon. Maybe because he had felt almost normal—capable. Like somebody who regularly came and went without a worry in the world. 222

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Like Gideon didn’t have a worry in the world, either. “No,” he whispered. He wanted to say more, but he knew there wasn’t anything else he needed to say. “I woke up, and you weren’t there. And you weren’t out here. And for all I knew, you’d decided to make a pot of coffee and went up in smoke because you touched the water or some shit like that.” Abruptly, Gideon let him go, taking a step back. He folded his arms over his chest until he looked like an indomitable wall of muscle. “You have no idea how badly I want to beat the shit out of you right now.” “Gideon…” Jesse thought his heart was going to jump out of his chest. He kept waiting for the stress to trigger another flashback, or a panic attack, or whatever the hell they were. But regardless of how angry Gideon was, Jesse didn’t feel truly threatened. He never did with Gideon. Without taking his eyes from Gideon’s face, he sank to his knees and put his hands behind his back. Gideon’s only visible reaction was to blink. “I stayed in this dimension because of you. Because you asked me to, boy.” “I know. Thank you.” Jesse paused, then added softly, “Sir.” “And what did I get in return?” “Nothing…Ingratitude.” “Fear.” Gideon’s control over his features finally slipped—or he did it deliberately, which was far more likely, given the situation—and his eyes gleamed, gold and deadly. “I fucking hate being afraid. It makes me do irrational things. If 223

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you had any idea the kinds of punishments I have going through my head right now, you wouldn’t be on your knees, boy. You’d be running for the hills.” “No, I wouldn’t run.” It felt awkward contradicting Gideon, like his mouth couldn’t frame the words right. “I wouldn’t run. I deserve to be punished.” “Deserving it isn’t what’s in question. It’s whether you could take it or not.” The gaze that raked over Jesse left him shivering. “I’m thinking not.” Jesse averted his eyes, focusing on Gideon’s feet. There still might be time to get out of the situation—to run for the hills as Gideon had suggested. But Jesse didn’t want to. There was a time when Gideon wouldn’t question what Jesse could take. There was a time when he’d be shaking with anticipation at the barest hint of this sort of punishment. Again, the contradictory words fit awkwardly in his mouth. “I can take it…Sir.” His blood roared in his ears while he waited. And waited. He was afraid to look up, afraid in that exhilarating way when he knew something was coming, something he wanted, something he needed. But he had no idea what Gideon was thinking, what he might have in mind. Was he angry? Had Jesse misinterpreted how best to placate Gideon’s fury? If he could just look into Gideon’s eyes, he thought he’d have the answer. But he couldn’t. He had to wait. That was Rule Number One. 224

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Gideon’s feet finally moved. Away. They turned on their heels and strode out of the room, disappearing into the bedroom. A drawer opened and shut. Then another drawer. A third. Something metallic clinked dully against something softer. Gideon’s feet returned. “Naked. Now.” Jesse pushed himself to his feet without looking up from the floor. He immediately pulled his shirt over his head. His shoes followed. By the time his jeans and boxers joined his shirt, his fingers were shaking. But not with fear. He hadn’t even been this excited when Gideon took him to Sangre. He knew Gideon must have been able to smell his arousal, hear the excited hammering of his pulse. His hands went behind his back again. Gideon filled his vision, looming broad and dangerous as he crouched down in front of him. “Not like that,” he muttered, grabbing one of Jesse’s wrists. His ruthless grip brought Jesse’s arm to the front, parallel to his cock. It was then Jess noticed the leather and steel dangling from Gideon’s other hand. The leather belonged to thick cuffs, the first of which Gideon pushed over Jesse’s waiting hand. He cinched it tight, then reached for the other wrist, slipping it into the restraint as well. Jesse’s attention was riveted by the thick steel ring that remained, however, and his throat tightened when Gideon grasped Jesse’s balls. The steel was cold where it slipped over his sac, but that 225

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was quickly replaced by icy fire as Gideon tightened the ring. Jesse was grateful his eyes were down; he could watch every movement of the hands he loved so much as they hooked the ring to each of the cuffs, locking Jesse’s arms into place. One little shift of his shoulders sent delicious pain straight through his scrotum, and he gasped as Gideon straightened and stepped back. “I never bothered buying one of these for my own use because you’re so fucking gorgeous hanging from the ceiling,” Gideon said. “But this’ll do for now. Move your hands, and it’ll pull on your balls. Move your arms, and it’ll pull on your balls. And don’t even try touching your cock. Not even you are that flexible.” The mention of hanging from the ceiling sent a peculiar tremor through Jesse’s midsection. He knew that if Gideon had tried that, he wouldn’t have protested. He also knew he was grateful that Gideon had opted for these cuffs, even as the pain spread through his abdomen and down his thighs. He immediately realized that walking would be as difficult as moving his hands and arms. He looked up through his lashes, trying to steal a quick glance of Gideon’s face. It was still set in an impossibly hard mask, not offering any view of what was going on in his mind, except that his anger hadn’t yet abated. “Maybe I’ve been too easy on you these past six months. Maybe that’s why you think you can ignore anybody’s feelings but your own.” Jesse flinched, but he didn’t attempt to deny Gideon’s 226

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accusation. He couldn’t, because the past six months felt gray and nebulous. The pain, the anticipation, Gideon’s voice, his anger, it was all too real. He inclined his head, a brief nod of agreement. “Do you have any idea how much I love you?” Gideon’s hands went to his belt, slowly unbuckling it and sliding the leather from the loops of his jeans. The sound made his cock jump, which sent a fresh jolt through his balls. “I asked you a question, boy. I suggest you answer it before I decide to just leave you in that until we get out of this fucking place.” Enough to stop. And Jesse knew that was the truth. He didn’t need to test the belief for its veracity. One word and Gideon would unlock him, but he didn’t want to utter the word. “No, Sir.” “Of course, you don’t. Because then you wouldn’t have pulled this fucking stunt in the first place.” He folded the belt over in his hand, making a loop before giving it a sharp pull. The leather snapped, audibly crackling in the air. This time, Jesse’s hands balled instinctively into fists, and the weight around his balls yanked. “I love you enough to risk pissing off Michelle by missing our deadline,” Gideon continued. “Michelle. The one woman in this and any dimension who would be happiest if she could drive a stake through my heart. And I gave her the perfect reason to do it. For you.” Gideon snapped the belt again, and Jesse could almost, but not quite, feel it against his bare skin—his ass, his thighs, his 227

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back. The pain would be flat and dull, not sharp, not hard enough to slice into his skin. Is this what he had wanted? Is that why he let Gideon bite him the night before? The mark on his neck tingled at the memory. “I know, Sir. I…I won’t do anything like this again.” “Don’t lie to me, boy.” The belt whistled through the air, but the broad blows Jesse had anticipated didn’t come. Instead, the tip of the leather cracked across Jesse’s cock, landing mid-shaft. The pain was so unexpected, so foreign, that his body didn’t know what to do with it at first. It burned, and he bit back his cry until it turned into a whimper. The pain changed, too, into something manageable. Into something a little addicting. “I’m not, Sir. I’m not lying.” “So you’re never going to find yourself in a position where you think, ‘You know, I don’t need to bother Gideon with this, he’s got enough on his mind, and if I don’t tell him, he won’t worry about me unnecessarily’?” The belt snapped again, this time landing a little lower on Jesse’s length. “I don’t think so.” Through the fresh wave of pain, Jesse realized Gideon had a point. One that he really couldn’t deny. When Gideon touched the belt to his sensitive skin a third time, he couldn’t stop his yelp. When he caught his breath, he whispered, “You’re right. I probably will…” The buckle clanked softly as Gideon relaxed his arm, letting the belt dangle at his side. “Tell me one thing.” His strides were long as he began to prowl around Jesse’s kneeling 228

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form. “How would you like it if something happened to me here, and you had to go back and face Emma? Tell her that I did something incredibly stupid that you could have stopped and gotten myself killed? Could you deal with seeing that in her face? Could you deal with feeling it?” Jesse’s throat tightened. It wasn’t fair to force him to face what pretty much amounted to his worst nightmare, and Gideon knew it. Apparently, Gideon wasn’t interested in playing fair. “No, I couldn’t. I couldn’t deal with that.” Gideon came to a stop directly in front of Jesse, crouching down until they were eye to eye. For the first time since walking in, he saw a crack in the angry façade, the ache gleaming in Gideon’s golden eyes. “Neither could I. I would end up losing both of you. I can’t even conceive what my world would be like then.” “You won’t lose me.” Jesse remembered the times he tried to apologize for letting Marcus Brooker take him, for putting himself in that situation. Each time he tried, Gideon wouldn’t let him. He wouldn’t hear Jesse—he wouldn’t let Jesse finish. “I’m sorry, Gideon. It won’t happen again. I’m going to be careful. I promise.” He cried out when Gideon suddenly grasped his cock, yanking upward so that it pulled on the ring. Gideon’s thumb swiped across the wet head once, twice, before releasing him, and Jesse watched, enthralled, as Gideon licked the fluid away. “I love you,” Gideon said softly. “But sometimes, I don’t 229

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know what the fuck to do with you.” Jesse desperately wanted to lean forward and kiss him. He wanted to rest his head on Gideon’s shoulder. Jesse just wanted to touch him. “Anything you want.” Gideon reached out and touched the puncture marks on Jesse’s neck. He didn’t stroke them. Instead, he placed a fingertip over each hole, and, not looking away, pressed as hard as he could. Jesse squeezed his eyes shut as Gideon applied pressure to the bruised skin, and his cock jerked. He wasn’t sure which prompted his reaction—the pain or the clear message. But he tilted his head, groaning when Gideon moved his fingers in a slow circle, digging the tips deeper into his flesh. “You took it this morning like you used to,” Gideon mused. “We haven’t fucked like that in months.” Jesse’s ass clenched, and he swayed forward. The movement made the cuffs pull against his balls, and his groin tightened. He ached in ways he could barely remember. “No. We haven’t.” Gideon leaned closer as well. He stopped just short of meeting Jesse’s mouth, his finger never slowing. “Do you want more?” Each soft word only made his touch hurt all that much more. “Because I need you to bleed, Jesse. I want to smell it, and taste it, and feel it against my skin when I fuck you. You say anything I want…that’s it. That’s what I want.” There wasn’t a question in his mind. He didn’t need to 230

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think about it. Everything before that moment, everything outside that room, everything that wasn’t Gideon simply did not exist. “Yes, please. I want more. I want that.” *

*

*

The terror Gideon had had upon waking and finding Jesse gone had surpassed the Brooker incident. In New York, there had always been hope, even as the days stretched and they couldn’t find him. He’d had Emma to help him keep his spirits up—as much as that could happen. He’d had the knowledge that Jesse was a skilled fighter, that he had determination to win, no matter what the costs. He didn’t have either of those here. In fact, on top of knowing Jesse wasn’t back in form and the lack of Emma’s positive attitude, Gideon had the knowledge that they didn’t belong in this dimension. That just a few hours earlier, he had nearly combusted with only a passing touch of his other self. He had woken up, Jesse’s side of the bed was cold, the apartment was deserted without a single sign of a note, and all Gideon could think was, He’s gone. But then Jesse had just walked through the door. Looking like himself. Smelling like himself. Acting like what he’d done wasn’t any worse than losing his keys. With his nerves worn so thin, Gideon knew he’d snapped. He also knew that if at any point Jesse had expressed legitimate fear or asked him to stop, he would have. Jesse hadn’t. 231

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So Gideon had pressed. And pressed. And now, all he wanted was to wash Jesse in blood and fuck him senseless. The scents emanating from Jesse’s skin called to Gideon’s base lust for him, the same lust that had spurred their initial explosive coming together over two years previous. It was a combination of excitement, need, desire, red-hot anticipation…all of it tangling together to create a cocktail that Gideon would never be able to refuse. Already, Jesse’s body strained to meet his, only the cuffs keeping him from reaching out and initiating contact. When Gideon finally released him, he was convinced his lover would break. He yearned to pick up and devour all the pieces. “First thing we have to do is bring all that delicious blood up to the surface.” Straightening, Gideon went back to retrieve his dropped belt, pulling his shirt off at the same time. “Stand up, boy. I’m going to need to get to every inch of you for this.” Jesse leaned back on his heels, then pushed himself to his feet, very carefully not moving his hands. His cock jutted against his stomach, the welts on the length almost as red as his balls. Gideon had expected Jesse to pull away at the first touch of the belt, had been waiting for the sharp scent of genuine fear to sting his nose. But Jesse’s only reaction had been one of desire, and now he watched Gideon with alert blue eyes—eager blue eyes. He took his time folding the belt. The buckle got cradled carefully against his palm; he had no desire to use the metal to seriously hurt Jesse. All he wanted was a strapping, and 232

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without any of his other toys from home, his belt would have to do. He’d been lucky to have the cuffs in the apartment. Mary had never indulged in submissive games, but later on in their relationship, she’d taken a thrill or two from topping Gideon instead. The cuffs and ball ring were one of the few pain devices she’d agreed to. Slowly, he circled behind Jesse. Skin was thicker on the back. Starting here would help Jess grow accustomed to the pain, and show Gideon just how far he could go before it got to be too much. The sight of Jesse’s firm ass drew him, though, and he ran a palm over the curve. “I probably should have fucked you harder this morning. You shouldn’t have been able to walk away from me.” His fingertips brushed against Jesse’s balls, and Jess shuddered at the light contact. Gideon couldn’t resist, and he squeezed the tender flesh until Jesse made a tight, choking sound. Before that pain had a chance to fade, Gideon flicked his wrist and brought the leather down on his ass. Jesse twitched, but didn’t try to step away or resist a second blow. His soft moan was all Gideon needed to prompt him to use the belt again. He alternated between striking Jesse’s reddening cheeks and caressing his sac and the softer skin behind it. Each time Jess would flinch from the belt, Gideon countered with almost tender strokes between his thighs. As soon as Jesse relaxed again, Gideon brought the leather back down, always choosing a new spot to enflame. Pre-come seeped from Jesse’s slit, and a single drop rolled 233

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across the velvety head to begin a descent down the shaft. Gideon licked his lips, eager to bend down and swallow Jesse’s cock, but he held back. There would be time enough for that later. Once Jesse was screaming. Once Jesse was ready for him to draw blood. Anticipating the taste of the two together made Gideon add just a little more force to his blows. Gideon began to circle him, looking for the perfect patches of pale skin to redden. Jesse began breathing heavily through his mouth as Gideon used the belt on his shoulders, his chest, his stomach, and his thighs. Jesse’s breathing grew louder with each passing second and stinging blow. But it was the caresses in between each hit that seemed to get to him the most. The scream he was waiting for came when he let the belt catch the tip of Jesse’s cock. It rippled through Gideon like a wave of scalding water, making him pause and appreciate it with a shudder. His hesitation lasted for only a moment, however. He swung the leather again, this time flicking across Jesse’s trapped sac. The second scream was even more delicious than the first. Gideon stepped forward, pressing into Jesse’s side, his erection hard against Jesse’s hip. Without a word, he grabbed Jesse’s nape and yanked his head to the side. His fangs raked shallow scratches from the softer tissue near the puncture wounds all the way down to the nearest taut nipple. Gideon teased the tip of his nipple with his tongue, being sure to taste the skin thoroughly. The blood was so close to the surface that it warmed his lips, and Jesse’s heart thudded heavily in his ears. He sank his teeth into the tight skin with 234

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enough pressure to make Jesse howl. His body tightened and he arched back, pushing against Gideon’s mouth. It poured over his tongue, sweet and hot, making it difficult not to drink and drink until Jesse collapsed in his arms. Gideon satisfied his hunger with just a few long, deep pulls, and deliberately pulled roughly away so that more droplets would run down Jesse’s scarred stomach. With his mouth stained red, Gideon dragged it across to the other nipple. He repeated his attentions, torturing the nipple into hardness, circling the dusky flesh. Jesse’s breathing was labored, and his arms twitched, clearly desperate to touch Gideon in more ways than he was allowed. Gideon waited until he heard Jesse inhale to speak, and with the pleas still caught on Jesse’s tongue, Gideon bit into the supple skin. He swallowed the first splash of blood into his mouth, but then he let it run down his lips and chin and over Jesse’s skin. When he lifted his head, Jesse’s attention was riveted on his face, and his chest rose and fell in sharp gasps. Gideon dragged his tongue up Jesse’s chest and neck to his jaw, the stubble catching on his tongue. He let his teeth nick the thin skin beneath Jesse’s chin and scraped his fingers down Jesse’s ribs, creating four long, thin strips of fresh blood. “You want more, don’t you, boy?” he rasped. He brushed his bloody lips over Jesse’s, then dragged his fangs back across the tender flesh in the opposite direction. “I’m almost thinking I should stop. Make you beg for it.” “Don’t…don’t stop, please.” His tongue darted out, 235

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brushing over Gideon’s lips, and then catching the very tip of one of his fangs. “Please, Gideon.” With the appeal almost a tangible beast between them, Gideon couldn’t resist. He crushed their mouths together, stabbing past Jesse’s meager defenses to suck hard at the open cuts, swallowing blood, swallowing breath. He would have swallowed more if it was physically possible. The desire to consume Jesse whole had never been as overwhelming as this. He felt the tips of Jesse’s fingers brush against his thighs. It was the faintest of touch, and he knew Jesse wanted to do more. Gideon took a step back, and Jesse tried to follow, moaning as he pulled on the ring around his balls. He increased the pressure on Jesse’s mouth, prolonging the kiss until he thought Jesse’s lungs must be ready to explode, and then he pushed a little bit further. When Gideon finally lifted his head, Jesse’s lips were swollen and bloody, and Jesse leaned forward trying to Gideon’s mouth again. “I don’t think so,” Gideon growled. “You fuck with my head, and you expect to get rewarded? That’s not the way this works, and you know it.” Jesse immediately straightened, his attention going to the floor. “I know. I’m sorry, Sir.” He prowled around Jesse, knowing that it would take little more than another kiss like that to forget all the anguish Jess had put him through that day. It was safer behind, where the temptation was less, and he had to deliberately tear his gaze away from Jesse’s luscious ass, red and hot and begging to be fucked. Instead, he focused on his enflamed back, pressing 236

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against it in order to absorb even more of his lover’s heat. “You know how tempting it is to sink to my knees and make your ass raw?” Reaching around, Gideon gripped Jesse’s wrists, pulling his arms away from his body in order to strengthen the tension in the links to the steel ring. He dropped his mouth to the mostly unmarked shoulder and began making random scratches, some of them barely breaking the surface, others almost as deep as a bite. “And you’d let me, too, wouldn’t you, boy?” “Yes.” The immediacy of the answer rendered it unnecessary. Gideon moved closer to Jesse’s neck, and his other hand went to Jesse’s chest, smoothing his fingertips through the blood there. “Yes, Sir. Anything.” Gideon lifted his sticky fingers to Jesse’s mouth, smiling unseen when Jesse sucked them past his lips without hesitation or prompting. “That is a treat, I do have to admit. Maybe I’ll save it for later.” Jesse wrapped his tongue around Gideon’s fingers, trying to pull them deeper in his mouth, his teeth scraping against Gideon’s knuckles. The suction went straight to Gideon’s aching cock. “There’s better things you can do with your mouth,” he muttered. His fingers made a popping sound as he pulled them free, and roughly, he shoved hard on Jesse’s shoulder, forcing him back to his knees. Holding him still, he circled to his front again, undoing his fly and pulling out his cock as he moved. When Jesse tried to chase it with his mouth, Gideon grabbed 237

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his hair and yanked his head back. “Not until I say so.” He slapped the wet tip back and forth across Jesse’s cheeks, making it harder with each one. “And I’m not convinced you want it badly enough yet.” Gideon dragged the head across Jesse’s lips, and Jesse groaned with obvious frustration. The tendons in his neck stood out as he held his head still, straining not to follow Gideon’s cock. “I do…I do, Sir. Please. I want it….so much. I want you to fuck my mouth. Please.” He had the tip positioned on Jesse’s lower lip when he hesitated. Glancing downward, he made his mind up almost instantly, angling his cock lower in order to draw it through the still flowing blood. When it was fully coated, he brought it back up to Jesse’s mouth. “Open.” Jesse obeyed, his jaw dropping wide. Gideon pushed inside, pumping shallow strokes in order for Jesse to thoroughly clean away all of the blood. Jesse lavished Gideon’s cock with his tongue, covering every bit of skin, every inch. Gideon controlled the depth, pulling away each time Jesse strained for more. Once he realized Gideon was going to keep the strokes shallow, he focused his attention on swiping his tongue over the smooth skin, on scraping his teeth over Gideon’s crown, and chasing the pre-come that mingled with the traces of blood still on the tip. It was hard to remember why he was so angry with Jesse when the swelter of his mouth drove Gideon to distraction. His 238

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head dropped back as he focused on the pleasure, and he groaned when Jess closed his jaw enough to sink his teeth into the hard shaft. “More,” was all he said. That was all Jesse needed to hear. There was a desperate, hungry edge to Jesse’s enthusiasm. He used his teeth and his tongue, the roof of his mouth, the vibrations from his moans, and the soft flesh at the back of his throat to heighten Gideon’s pleasure. His cheeks hollowed each time he bit down on Gideon’s shaft, sucking as hard as he could before he soothed the area with his tongue. It didn’t take long for it to be too much to withstand. Gripping the sides of Jesse’s head, Gideon held him still and pushed past the resistance of his tongue, past the back of his throat, to bury the head of his cock deep inside him. Jess swallowed around the length, but it was the adoring glance up through his lashes that was Gideon’s undoing. “Don’t leave me like that again.” He couldn’t have stopped the words, any more than he could stop the forceful thrusts of his cock, in and out of Jesse’s mouth. “I don’t know what I’d do without you.” Jesse couldn’t vocalize his agreement, but he didn’t have to. His answer was in his heavy eyes, and the way he took each hard thrust without flinching or pulling away. The smell of his drying blood, coupled with the fresh pre-come leaking from his cock made Gideon’s head spin. He wasn’t sure what was better—the delicious scent, or the unbelievable heat of Jesse’s mouth as it scorched him with each stroke. As wound up as Gideon was, it didn’t take long for his 239

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balls to tighten. Jesse must have sensed how close he was, because his moans became louder, vibrating through Gideon’s cock until he thought he was going to explode. He pulled out, much to Jesse’s audible disappointment, and let go of him in order to grasp his length. It took only three hard pulls of his shaft for his entire body to tighten, and he gasped as his world narrowed down to Jesse’s waiting tongue and the fire racing through his veins. He shot across Jesse’s face, one blast hitting his cheek, another his lips, a third across his chin. By the time he finished, Gideon was shaking, and he drew a trembling hand through the sticky fluid and toward Jesse’s mouth. Jesse parted his lips again, cleaning the come from Gideon’s fingers. He didn’t try to lick his chin and cheek—he waited patiently for Gideon to drag more to his waiting mouth. Jesse’s breath came in ragged gasps, and he clenched and unclenched his fists inside the cuffs. Each time he did, his cock jerked. Gideon dropped his gaze to the long shaft. The welts were mostly faded now, but Jesse’s sac was a deep red. “I’ll bet you’d like to touch yourself. Get some relief.” “Yes, Sir.” It almost sounded like a confession. “By all rights, I should just leave you like this.” “I know, Sir.” He crouched down so that they were eye to eye again. “If I unlocked your hands, what would be the first thing you’d do?” “Touch you. If you let me.” “You left me. I don’t think I should let you do anything.” 240

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“Gideon…Sir…I just…I know. Please, let me touch you. Please.” “No.” It hurt him to say almost as much as it hurt Jesse to hear. “I’m touching you.” He dropped his hands to the cuffs and unfastened them without breaking Jesse’s gaze. The ring stayed in place as his arms were freed, and Gideon reached between Jesse’s thighs in order to tug on the swollen sac. Jesse cried out, and his now free hands went up to his side, paused, curled into fists, and were forced back down. Color raced up Jesse’s neck and face, his skin pink everywhere it wasn’t stained red with blood. “Oh, my God…Gideon…I can’t…” “You can’t what?” He reached farther to find the hot flesh of Jesse’s ass, seeking out the tight ring unerringly and pressing a single sticky finger into Jesse’s clenching passage. Leaning forward, he sucked at a drying patch of skin, but when a response didn’t come, he bit into the muscle. “I can’t….” He was nearly sobbing for breath by the time Gideon buried the finger completely in his passage. “Take it. Going to come. Please.” The entreaty rolled through Gideon in a hot, succulent wave. He found the silver ring and loosened it with a single twist, drinking in Jesse’s relieved gasp like he’d been dying of thirst. Though he’d told Jesse not to, Jess clutched at Gideon’s arms, clinging to him as he swayed. By the time Gideon fisted the throbbing cock, Jesse was quivering. He tore his mouth away and pressed it to Jesse’s ear. 241

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“Shoot all over yourself, and I’ll lick it off,” Gideon promised with a powerful stroke up Jesse’s length. “Then once you’re clean, I’ll fuck you properly.” Jesse’s grip tightened, like if he let go, he’d disappear. By the second stroke, Jesse was shaking violently. He buried his face against Gideon’s neck, and on the third stroke, he screamed, the harsh sound almost ripped from his throat. Hot come covered Gideon’s hand and Jesse’s stomach, and Jesse moaned with each long spurt. He was still trembling against Gideon’s body after his cock stopped jerking. Gideon pulled his hand free of Jesse’s ass in order to wrap his arm around him and crush him to his chest. “Please don’t do that to me again,” he whispered. “I won’t, Gideon. I promise.” His lips branded the words against Gideon’s neck. “Love you.” Gideon squeezed his eyes shut, banishing the last of his fear. “I love you, too.”

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CHAPTER 18 After Gideon finished pounding into him, Jesse didn’t want to move, or speak, or do anything but pass out right there on the living room floor. But Gideon half-carried, half-walked Jesse into the bedroom and deposited him on the bed. His skin was sticky and dry, and his body was sore. He knew he wouldn’t forget this particular lesson for a very long time— not as long as he could still see and feel the force of Gideon’s anger in the form of cuts, bites, and bruises. He felt drained. Not just drained of energy—or of blood— but also drained of something he couldn’t quite name. Empty of something he wouldn’t miss. Each bite and cut and slice of Gideon’s fang relieved the pressure beneath his skin, provided 243

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an outlet for all the dark, bitter memories that flowed through him, choking his veins like a poison. But none of that really mattered to Jesse if Gideon was still angry. Jesse wanted to tell him about Michelle and Henry before he fell asleep—or worse, before he forgot. But if Gideon didn’t want to hear the information now, Jesse wasn’t keen to volunteer it. And it wasn’t exactly easy to read Gideon right now. Jesse stretched out on his side, supporting his head on his hand, and watched as Gideon disappeared into the bathroom. He knew he needed to shower—or bath—but he wasn’t sure he had the energy to get out of bed again. Relief washed through him as Gideon returned with a bowl of hot water and a cloth. The bed bowed as Gideon sat down on the edge. His gaze kept fixed on the bowl as he soaked the cloth. Even when he wrung it out, his eyes remained averted, his lashes too low for Jesse to see anything that might help analyze his mood. “We don’t have any of your cream to help with this,” Gideon commented. The bites and scrapes stung as Gideon washed the blood from his shoulder and neck, but Jesse didn’t mind. The minor pain kept him alert. “I’ll be fine. I just need to rest a little.” “You’re not going out again. I’ll have to find somebody to come over and keep an eye on you while I go see what I can dig up on that shortlist.” He rinsed the cloth out in the water. “Maybe Mary.” “That’s not necessary.” 244

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Gideon finally met his eyes. “You’re not going out again.” “Fine. But I don’t need a babysitter. Besides, I think I’ve narrowed your shortlist down to one.” “It’s not babysitting. It’s a second set of eyes in case something happens. We’re not supposed to be here, remember?” He frowned, visibly stopping himself as the rest of Jesse’s statement sank in. “What exactly did you do today?” “I went to talk to Michelle about the fact that we’re not supposed to be here. Then I stopped at the church to see how Mary and Hal were doing with the shortlist. They plotted recent, odd attacks on a map. There were several clustered around Sangre and Henry’s warehouse.” “Warehouse. The same one he distributed the obsidian from?” Jesse winced as the rag went over a fresh bruise on his throat. “That’s the one. Hal said it’s a warehouse here as well. Of course, there’s no guarantee it’s Henry’s, but it seems enough of a coincidence to make the leap.” Gideon digested this information in silence, washing away more of the dried blood. It left the cuts clean but exposed to the air, stinging more than when he had started, but Gideon’s touch remained gentle and sure. “Would you rather I ask Hal to come over?” He rose from the bed to carry the bowl back to the bathroom. “I’m going to have to go out and confirm what’s up with Henry.” Jesse would rather just be left in peace, but in the grand scheme of things, this was a fight they didn’t need to have. He waited until Gideon returned with a fresh bowl of water and 245

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gently pushed him to his back before saying, “Mary is fine, if she doesn’t mind coming over. I suppose it’s not a bad idea anyway, after what Michelle told me.” “What did Michelle tell you?” “That we better figure out a way to get home soon. Our presence here is hurting the dimension, and she said…if it comes down to us or the dimension, she’ll remove the problem herself.” “Remo—she threatened you?” “Yeah. But she is giving us a chance to figure out a way back.” Gideon rolled his eyes. “Oh, well, that’s generous of her. Why the hell isn’t she helping us instead? She’s the so-called expert.” “I don’t know.” Jesse caught his breath as Gideon cleaned the dried blood from his nipple. “Maybe because she doesn’t owe anything to us. We’re not friends of hers, after all.” “This was her brilliant idea in the first place,” he heard Gideon mutter. But he didn’t say anything more, settling to rinse away streak after streak of scarlet from Jesse’s skin. He paused on some of the puncture wounds, letting his wet fingertips graze over the small holes, his features softening with each stroke. “If I can find a way to end this tonight, I will,” Gideon said. “If it is Henry, the last thing we want is for him to get a whiff of you now.” “Why? He probably saw me at Sangre.” “Because you smell like dinner now, that’s why. He’s got 246

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a soft spot for you, remember? You’re his fucking catnip.” Jesse frowned, running his fingertips over his clean chest. “That’s not quite the way I remember it. I think he was far more interested in you.” “Even more reason to keep you away from him. If he is the one who’s out to kill me—” He stopped, grimacing. “The other me,” he corrected. “He’ll be looking for any way to get the upper hand. We can’t give it to him.” Jesse nodded. “Yeah. You’re right. How are you going to find out if it’s him?” Gideon shifted his position, dragging the rinsed cloth across the top of Jesse’s thighs. “Might as well take the bull by the horns. First step is to go see him, face to face.” Jesse knew it made the most sense, but he didn’t like the plan. He especially didn’t like it because he would be expected to sit there and wait. Gideon probably would not have any sympathy for him if he complained about it. “And then you stake him and we go home?” “That’s the only thing we can do. I want out of this place.” Gideon stopped and looked up. “I want my life back. Not this one.” “You’re not the only one. I don’t think I’ve ever been homesick like I am now.” He tilted his head back, allowing Gideon to get the dried flakes of come from his chin and neck, as well as the scarlet stains from the cuts on his lips. “You wouldn’t be tempted to…stay in this life, given the chance?” “I might have been. In the beginning.” Gideon ran his thumb over Jesse’s bottom lip, following the same path as the 247

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cloth. “But I don’t belong here anymore. Even if Mary didn’t already have a me in her life, we’re not the same people.” Jesse followed Gideon’s thumb with his mouth and caught the tip gently between his teeth. “It was a purely hypothetical question. I wouldn’t let you have the chance to stay anyway.” The gaze he lifted to Jesse’s was the softest Jess had seen since returning. “I guess I’m not the only one who’s a little possessive, huh?” “I’ll admit to being a lot possessive if you will.” “Hey, I never claimed not to be. I clearly remember telling you I’d rip out the throat of anybody I thought might take you away from me.” “Oh, I haven’t forgotten. That sort of vivid imagery sticks with a person.” Jesse paused, closing his eyes as Gideon continued cleaning his face. “Do I look like I should avoid venturing out in public anyway?” “I think you look perfect,” Gideon said softly. He felt the mattress shift. The cloth disappeared, and in its place, Gideon brushed his lips tenderly over Jesse’s. Jesse’s hands went to Gideon’s shoulders as his lips moved to Jesse’s chin, then the corner of his mouth, then his cheekbone. He was too exhausted to go another round, but he was greedy for the contact, too. “Maybe. But you have different ideas of perfect than most people.” “Do other people’s ideas really matter?” Jesse supposed it was easy for Gideon to say that—he wasn’t the one who garnered strange looks. But that never 248

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bothered him anyway. “No. They really don’t,” he murmured, skimming his mouth over Gideon’s jaw. “I can’t…believe how long it’s been since we’ve done anything like that.” Gideon drew back, though he hovered just inches away. His dark eyes had lost their bleak, hard edge, searching his now with emotion gleaming bright. “And you’re okay? No regrets?” Jesse made sure to hold Gideon’s gaze as he answered. “No regrets at all. I’m okay. I’m better than okay.” That seemed to satisfy him, and he sat back, dipping the cloth into the cooling water. “Remember to write a note next time. I don’t have that many toys here.” Jesse smiled. “Fair enough. But it is a pretty effective way to get you to use toys.” Gideon arched a single brow. “There’s also the ‘put you in a spreader and walk away for the night’ technique. That one works pretty effectively, too.” Jesse’s smile faded. “You’d be just mean enough to do that, too. I’ll never forget the note again. How about when we get back, we try the put me in a spreader and not walk away technique?” “We’ll see.” The fresh twinkle in Gideon’s eye belied his curt tone. “Emma will be glad to see you like this. It’ll be good to see both of you smiling again.” The mention of Emma made his heart twist a little. Maybe he wasn’t homesick. Maybe he just missed her. He didn’t think he’d care too much about which dimension he inhabited as long as he had Gideon and Emma with him. 249

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“It’ll be good to see you frowning less.” He thought he saw a ghost of a smile as Gideon worked at cleaning away the rest of the blood and come, his fingers gentle where he handled Jesse’s cock and balls. They lingered a moment too long on his perineum, as if Gideon was debating touching further, and Jesse was disappointed when they finally withdrew. He realized it was probably pushing his body a little too far, but it would be nice to feel Gideon buried inside him, his weight bearing him down into the mattress, his kisses tender and continuous. So lost in his daydream, Jesse was a little surprised when Gideon rose from his bed, carrying the bowl to the dresser. A quick glance down the length of his body showed what he already knew—that his skin shone from Gideon’s ministrations—and he looked up in time to see Gideon stripping out of the rest of his clothes. “Now that we’re pretty sure who’s behind all this, we should start thinking more seriously about how we’re going to get home.” Gideon draped his pants over the back of the chair before coming around the other side of the bed. “Can we expect any help at all from Michelle on that front?” “I don’t know. I really don’t think so.” Jesse paused, wishing he didn’t have to add, “I’m not sure what to do right now. Our best hope might be Emma and Michelle.” Gideon settled next to him, his hand on Jesse’s hip pushing upward onto his side. Fitting against Jesse’s back, he looped his arm around Jesse’s waist until their bodies spooned together. 250

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“I know Emma won’t give up.” His nose brushed against Jesse’s nape, his voice soft. “It’s Michelle I’m worried about.” “Michelle is not going to put the whole dimension at risk because she doesn’t like you. Besides, unlike the Michelle in this dimension, she is my friend. Emma’s, too.” Gideon only grunted. His mouth never moved from where it rested against Jesse’s shoulder. “What’s the first thing you want to do when we get back?” Gideon asked. “Something with all three of us.” Jesse considered the question for several seconds as he settled more into Gideon’s body. “I think we should finish the tattoos.” A soft chuckle tickled across his neck. “I figured that was a given.” “I just want to get Emma between us again,” Jesse admitted. “I can’t even think of anything else. Well, besides the spreader bar, obviously.” “You could think about houses. The market’s soft. It might be a good time for us to consider looking for someplace bigger.” Jesse wanted to turn and look at him, wanted to see if he was completely sincere, or just making a joke. But Gideon tightened his hold, refusing to let him move. “You’re serious? I didn’t think anything would be able to shake you from the apartment.” “That was before we were all tripping over each other,” Gideon said lightly. “You wouldn’t want to find someplace where we could get a Jacuzzi? You, me, Emma, lots of hot 251

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bubbles. There’s no bad there.” “Oh, I’m not saying I don’t want to find a bigger place. A Jacuzzi, a nice big basement for a playroom, a nice big room for a library. There’s definitely no bad with this plan. Especially since most of my stuff has been in storage.” “You’re not going to want to hang those awful paintings I saw at your apartment, are you? You’re going to offend Emma’s sensibilities with those things.” “Hey, those paintings are fine pieces of art. One-of-a-kind originals. They’ll really be worth something in a few…centuries, at the most.” “Even more reason to protect them from fading or dust.” “Just for that, I’m going to convince Emma that they need to be hung right in the living room. So they can be enjoyed by everybody.” Gideon snorted. “You forget. Emma’s got taste.” “You forget how convincing I can be when I really want something.” “You don’t really want this. You’d much rather have walls of books.” His lips moved softly against Jesse’s skin. “Not that that’s a bribe or anything.” Jesse sighed. “You play dirty. But I guess you probably already know that. Fine, you win this round.” “One of these days, you’re going to realize I always win.” “Probably the same day I realize you’re always right, too.” “You know, you could always try humoring me and at least pretend to think those things. Think Christmas gift.” Jesse chuckled. “You don’t have to wait until Christmas. 252

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I’ll pretend to think it now. You’re always right, utterly brilliant, and perfect in every way.” Gideon’s arm tightened around Jesse’s waist, and he nudged a strong thigh between Jesse’s legs. It pushed gently against his balls, enough to remind him of their earlier encounter, but Gideon didn’t press any further. “Sarcasm doesn’t become you,” he murmured. “But I love you anyway.” “I know.” He rested his hand on Gideon’s arm, and his eyelids began to fall. He knew when he woke up, Gideon would probably be gone. Nothing would keep Gideon there once the sun went down. Jesse didn’t want to sleep, but he only had the energy left to mutter, “I wasn’t being sarcastic.”

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CHAPTER 19 Leaving Jesse alone in the apartment made Gideon uneasy, but after the events of the afternoon, he was fairly sure he didn’t have to worry about Jess wandering out again without his knowledge. He had left with Jesse still asleep. He could have woken him to say good-bye, but that would likely have led to more cuddling, or more kissing, or more of anything else, and they didn’t have time to waste. Time was ticking. With each minute that passed, Gideon felt more and more uneasy, his muscles tense and hot, his nerves frayed. He hadn’t said anything to Jesse yet, but there were moments when he thought he would fly apart, like the dimension recognized him as an outsider and would dissemble 254

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him, cell by cell, if he didn’t leave. It was one reason why he’d clung so hard to Jess as they napped. He needed something solid to hold on to. Gideon did his best to ignore the added sensitivities as he strode purposefully toward Sangre. He ignored the way the bite in the air made his skin crackle, and he tried not to focus on the way colors seemed to blur into a watercolor left out in the rain. He wouldn’t let the dimensional magic win before he had the chance to save Mary and the others, and he couldn’t let Jesse down in returning home when it was all done. The bouncer let him in with only a nod, though the fact that he arrived alone drew a frown that disappeared so quickly, Gideon wasn’t sure he’d seen it at all. Cries of welcome buffeted him from every angle, but he dismissed them all, heading straight for the bartender. “I need to see Henry,” he said. The bartender paused. His eyes flickered to the narrow stairs that led to the offices, like he was assessing the wisdom in letting Gideon see Henry at all. Gideon leaned over the bar and lowered his voice. “I’m pretty sure Henry wants to see me. Let’s make this easy for both of us, and I’ll just go on up on my own. You never spoke to me.” “I never spoke to you,” the bartender repeated. He turned his back on Gideon and moved to the opposite end of the counter. Prowling around the edge of the floor, Gideon blocked out the scents of sex and blood that filled the air. The closer he got 255

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to confronting Henry, the more convinced he got Jesse was right. Henry craved power. Henry craved chaos. Gideon had a stabilizing effect on Chicago, no matter what decade or dimension. Vampires feared him. Without him around, they would either look elsewhere for leadership or let terror loose in the streets. Both had been acceptable to the Henry he had known. Both were likely acceptable to this one. Gideon didn’t bother to knock on the office door. He threw it open without warning and strolled into the room like he owned the building. His eyes immediately went to Henry’s face, daring the other vampire to challenge him, to say one word of protest. But Henry didn’t seem surprised to see him. “Shut the door.” He pushed it shut without looking back. Henry looked like he always had—built like a brickhouse, head shaved in an attempt to look even more menacing, brown eyes so deep-set they made his eyelashes completely disappear. He was a terrifying figure to almost anyone. But not Gideon. “You should really start thinking about getting some bodyguards,” he commented. He dropped to the corner of the couch as if he didn’t have a care in the world, as if it didn’t matter to him at all that he was putting himself in a weaker position. Henry would get the message, though. The one that said, I’m really not impressed with how big and bad you think you are. Henry leaned back in his chair. “I might consider it if you 256

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keep barging in like this. Is there a reason for this visit?” For a second, Henry’s words made him pause. Keep barging in? Had his other self been to see him recently? If he didn’t need the confirmation, he might have backed out, but there was no choice now but to plough forward. “Can’t old friends just want to talk?” Henry offered a hint of a smile. His lips didn’t move, but a shadow seemed to pass from his eyes. “Sure they can.” He closed the ledger he had been studying when Gideon came in and slid it in the desk drawer. “I need a break, anyway. I’ve had nothing but headaches since opening this club. I never should have eaten my accountant.” Gideon grinned. “That’s what you get for picking one who looks good. You need to find some old guy who’s been locked away with his numbers for a century and tastes like gristle when you bite into him.” “Or I could just kill everybody who thinks I owe them money.” His face darkened again, like he was contemplating just how to go about doing exactly that. “But this place is worth the headache. When are you going to bring in that pet of yours again? I never got my chance with him.” “Soon,” Gideon lied. “He’s recovering. I had to punish him today.” “It’s not fair to keep him locked away after flaunting him like that. But then, you’ve always been a greedy son of a bitch. What about that other one of yours? What’s her name? Mary?” He bit the inside of his cheek to tamp down the sudden 257

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anger. “She’s too public a figure to bring around,” he managed to say smoothly. “The last thing you want is her people around here, torching the place.” “Her people?” Henry snorted. “I doubt we’d have much to worry about from that group. But if you’re looking for a way to pass the time tonight, we’ve got a few new kids downstairs. They need to be broken in properly. You’re welcome to have the first go at them.” The last thing he was in the mood for was breaking in new toys for Henry, but he couldn’t let him know that. “Maybe next time. Unless you want to come down and do it with me.” He flashed a charming smile. “It’s been awhile since we teamed up. I miss those days.” “It has been a long time.” He leaned forward. “I don’t want to go downstairs, though. We can bring them up here. That way, we won’t have to share with anybody else.” He’d been bluffing, but he really should have known better. If nothing else, Henry was a carnal creature. He liked sex and blood just a little bit too much to turn down Gideon’s offer of tag teaming. In ways of getting Henry to open up, however, it might just work. Show they were on the same side, or at the very least, not enemies. Would Henry even agree to such an arrangement if he was out to kill Gideon? There was only one way to find out. “I fucking love that idea,” Gideon said. “Someone juicy. Someone we can really sink our teeth into.” Henry’s grin was slow and feral. “I’ve got just the girl waiting downstairs. I’ll have her brought up.” 258

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A pang of guilt flared and was just as quickly extinguished. This was a necessary evil. He needed the information without fucking up this dimension any more than they already had. Jesse need never know. *

*

*

The ceiling held no answers to the questions tumbling through Jesse’s mind. He was aware of every tick of the clock, hoping each second would be the one that brought Gideon back to the apartment. He wondered if his faith in Michelle was misplaced, if maybe Gideon was right to be skeptical. He wondered what he would do if he never saw Emma again, and what she would do if they never came home. Above all, he wished that he could do something besides sit there and brood. But the apartment was void of anything that might help him, and he was not going to leave again. Not until Gideon returned. Jesse straightened as he heard the door unlock, but he knew even before the visitor stepped into view that it wasn’t Gideon. He grabbed a shirt without looking and pulled it over his head, hiding his chest from view as Mary’s figure filled the doorway. “I guess Gideon decided to give you a call, after all.” She looked taller somehow, dressed in slim slacks with a baggy winter coat. Her hands were buried in their pockets, almost a defensive pose, but the smile on her face was warm and genuine. 259

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“He said he was going to be a while and asked for me to come over and keep you company until he got back.” She headed for the kitchen, shedding her coat along the way. “Do you have any food here? Because I’m starved and you look like you could use a good meal.” Now that Mary mentioned food, Jesse realized the ache in his stomach was hunger pangs. “I picked up a few things this week. Eggs. Milk. Bread. Cereal. That’s about it, though.” “Fried egg sandwiches, it is then.” He followed her into the tiny kitchen, not surprised when she moved expertly around the space, pulling out pans and ingredients without hesitation. This was her space. He was the intruder. And yet, she did nothing to make him feel unwelcome. “You could start some coffee,” she said as she turned on the stove. “The way Gideon made it sound, we might be up all night.” Jesse went through the motions thoughtlessly, wondering why Gideon hadn’t bothered to call him and tell him what was going on. “What did he say?” “Not much. He only had a few seconds. But he said he’d have a definitive answer for us on this Henry, one way or another, by the time he got home.” Jesse nodded, inhaling the first wisp of the coffee’s rich aroma. “If he sent you over here to make sure I don’t take off on my own again, you don’t have to stick around.” The eggs sizzled when they hit the hot frying pan. “Nope. He sent me over here so I’d be here when he got back. 260

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Something about getting battle plans into place.” She cast him an amused grin. “Are you trying to get rid of me?” “No.” Which was true. And a part of him wanted to grasp any excuse he could find to spend time with this woman. Partly out of curiosity. Partly because he liked her. Mostly because this might be his very last chance to get to know her. “But I don’t want you to be stuck here all night. I figured I’d be kind and give you an out, in case you had something better to do with your time.” “Nope. My Gideon went out as soon as the sun went down. I didn’t argue too much. He’s been cooped up in my apartment since the attack.” Jesse frowned. “Where did he go? A chance meeting between the two of them could burn the whole city down.” “To one of his other apartments. One whoever is after him doesn’t know about. He wanted some different clothes, he said.” Mary chuckled. “You know how vain he is.” Jesse nodded, but he wasn’t sure he believed her. Gideon was absolutely vain, but he wasn’t casual or indifferent when it came to Mary’s well-being. Well, not anymore, Jesse amended. Maybe Gideon really did need something as horrific as what happened to Mary to force him to change his priorities? It made sense, but Jesse felt uneasy with the explanation. “And Hal and Marcus? What are they up to?” “Marcus has bible study tonight, and I made Hal go with Gideon. I left a note at my place to let them know to come over here when they got back.” She glanced at him, but only 261

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for a moment. “I’m guessing that’s okay.” Jesse didn’t mind Hal. In fact, Hal was so much like his son that Jesse felt very comfortable round him. But being near Mary’s Gideon was trying. Being in the same room with both Gideons at the same time exhausted him. Jesse wondered if he was the only one. Mary certainly didn’t seem perturbed by the possibility. “More than okay. Is it…do you think it’s…weird to be around both Gideons at once?” “I would’ve called it exhausting.” Turning off the burner, she flipped the eggs onto the waiting bread. “They don’t bring out the best in each other, do they?” “No, they really don’t. Do you think it reflects a certain amount of self-loathing?” Jesse’s question was only halfjoking. “Before meeting your Gideon, I would’ve said no. Now…” Mary shrugged. “I guess it makes me sad to think he never really gets over it.” Jesse knew it would be less of a surprise to her if she knew the full story—if she knew what Gideon had been doing the night she died. But it wasn’t his story to tell. Her Gideon needed to come clean on his own terms. “It was one of the defining moments of his existence. I’m not sure anybody could get over something like that.” She didn’t respond right away, cutting the sandwiches in half and then carrying the plates out to the living room. Sitting down in the corner of the couch, she folded her long legs beneath her as she took the cup of coffee Jesse offered. 262

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“Bad things happen to the best of us.” Mary blew across her steaming drink, regarding him with compassion. “Are you going to let what happened with you and Marcus be one of your defining moments? Because I’d hate to think you don’t ever get over something like that.” Jesse sat on the opposite end of the couch, balancing his plate on his leg. “I never considered it a defining moment. I don’t want to hold onto it. But…Marcus took something from me that I’m just now getting back.” “I know what you must think but, honestly, he’s a good man. Whatever happened between you…I’m sorry for it. For both of you.” Jesse inclined his head. “Marcus…still scares me. No, not Marcus. The idea of him. The notion that grief could drive a person to those lengths, drop him to those depths. There’s a monster somewhere inside of him…maybe in all of us….” His voice grew softer until it trailed away and he smiled selfconsciously. “What is it like to inspire that sort of devotion in people?” Mary sipped her coffee. “That was never what I wanted, you know. I hope you don’t think of me as…needing this kind of attention. All I ever wanted was to get people angry about the inequalities we live with.” Her lashes ducked. “Though I know I haven’t really discouraged them from following me. Maybe that makes me as vain as Gideon.” “That doesn’t make you vain, I don’t think. Somebody has got to be the leader, after all. Somebody’s got to be willing to put themselves right on the frontline. Besides, I don’t think 263

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Gideon could ever be with anybody as vain as he is.” She smiled. “You must inspire that sort of devotion, too, you know. Gideon’s pretty stingy about who he cares about.” Jesse’s eyebrows knitted together. He felt that that was wrong, somehow. He couldn’t lead people the way she did. And he had seen the way Gideon—both the Gideons—looked at her, the way Hal always tracked her with his eyes. And, of course, he had a firsthand account of Brooker’s feelings for her. “I’m not sure if it’s quite the same.” “You guys came here in the first place because of what happened to you, right?” “Yes. It was either a strange dimension or taking a vacation to a hospital—of course, I wouldn’t have been able to see Gideon. I think it says something about my mental condition that a strange dimension seemed like a better idea.” “But you still came,” Mary pressed. “Gideon messed with dimensions for you. You can’t tell me that’s not a big deal.” The corner of his mouth lifted, and he looked down to the untouched sandwich on his plate. “I know it is. Gideon’s always…he’s always been willing to do whatever necessary. Whatever he could for me.” “And if Gideon would do that for you…I’m going to bet he’s not the only one who’s devoted to you.” “Emma,” Jesse murmured. At Mary’s questioning look, Jesse shook his head. “It’s…difficult to explain. She’s just our…Emma. Okay, point taken. Maybe I do have an idea what it’s like to have that sort of devotion.” 264

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She bit into her sandwich, the yolk dribbling over her lower lip. With an embarrassed flush, Mary wiped it away, licking the yellow away from her thumb. “It’s better if I think of it as devotion anyway,” she said. She gestured vaguely toward his jaw. “Because if I didn’t think Gideon loved you, I’d be pretty pissed about that.” Jesse frowned and ran his fingers over his face. “Oh. Yeah. I asked for it. Well, that sounds wrong, but I really did ask for it.” The cuffs were still sitting on the floor and he nodded at them. “Though I guess you might know a little something about that.” Her gaze followed his, and for the first time since meeting her, Jesse saw her look less than composed. Her nostrils flared, her eyes ducked, and she shifted uncomfortably in her seat. “I’d say it’s not what it looks like, but…” She shook her head, smiling shyly. “This is the weird thing for me. Sitting here with someone who knows Gideon like I do. Because I can make a joke in a room of a hundred people about how he likes to think nobody listens to him and I’m pretty sure you’d be the only person to laugh with me.” Jesse snorted. “I never thought I’d meet anybody who knows him as well as I do. And I am really happy I got the chance to meet you. Though I bet if Gideon knew we would compare notes on him, he would have never asked you to come over.” Mary surprised Jess by reaching across the distance that separated them and resting a slim hand on his knee. “I’m so 265

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glad he has you.” Her voice was as soft as her touch. “If my death brought out a monster in Marcus…well, Gideon’s monster is a lot closer to the surface. It’s a little scary to think where he could have gone.” Jesse covered her hand. “You can be proud of him. He was doing the right thing long before he met me. I just helped smooth over the rough edges a bit. In fact, I sought him out because of his reputation…well, that and the pictures I found.” She cocked her head, curiously. “What pictures?” “Gideon, being a vain creature, would apparently pose for anybody who had a camera. My father had just about every book ever published about vampires, and most of them had a picture or two of Gideon.” “So what you’re telling me is you sought him out because he’s gorgeous.” The twinkle in her eye belied the teasing in her tone. “Don’t tell him that. He’ll be impossible to live with when you get back.” “I absolutely sought him out because he’s gorgeous, but unfortunately, he knows that, and he’s already impossible to live with.” Mary laughed and returned to her sandwich. “And we love him anyway.” “We do,” Jesse murmured, focusing on his own sandwich. They fell into a compatible silence, and Jesse realized that if things were different, if they had met in a different time and context, they would have been good friends. The thought was enough to warm him and reaffirm that they had done the right thing by staying. Despite Michelle’s threats and their uncertainty, Jesse couldn’t regret it. 266

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CHAPTER 20 Jesse kept as much of the apartment between him and Mary’s Gideon as he could. As soon as the vampire stepped through the door, his nostrils flared, and he had looked at Jesse with a sly, knowing grin. Hal, for his part, had merely frowned when he noticed the fresh marks on Jesse’s face, but he didn’t say anything. A part of Jesse wished they could leave—or wished he could leave. But they all needed to wait for Gideon to come home. Jesse only wished they weren’t waiting in vain. If he came back with nothing new to report, Jesse wasn’t sure what they were going to do. He was damned near positive Henry was the guilty party. If he was wrong, or Gideon simply could 267

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not find anything incriminating against Henry, Jesse wasn’t sure they had time to start their investigation over again. Finally, as the clock slid past midnight, Jesse thought he heard footsteps on the stairs. Neither Mary nor Hal seemed to notice, but Gideon looked up, sharp and alert, watching the door for several seconds before his counterpart opened it. “Well, at least you didn’t jump out from behind the furniture and yell ‘surprise,’” his Gideon commented as his gaze swept over the occupants of the room. It settled on Mary, his brows drawn together. “There wasn’t any need to bring everybody over. You could have just relayed what we decided.” “And miss out on all the fun?” the other Gideon said with a smirk. “Come on. You know me better than that.” “What did you find out?” Jesse asked as he straightened to his feet. He realized that Gideon didn’t look quite as put together as he normally did, and his frown reflected Gideon’s. “Did you get in a fight?” “Not exactly—” “Wait.” The other Gideon rose from his seat and circled the Gideon still at the door, his expression growing darker with each passing second. “You went and saw Henry? Are you stupid or something?” Gideon moved to knock away his counterpart’s accusatory finger, but checked it at the last moment, clearly remembering what happened the last time the two had touched each other. “I had to find out whether or not it was him, didn’t I? So lay off.” “I might be willing to do that if you hadn’t completely 268

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fucked everything up by going there.” The other Gideon took a step back. “Or was fucking the entire purpose of going there in the first place?” Mary folded her arms and crossed over to her Gideon’s side, subtly blocking the two vampires with her body. “What are you talking about? What did he fuck up?” That wasn’t what caught Jesse’s attention, but he opted to keep his mouth shut as he waited for an answer to Mary’s question. The other Gideon fidgeted for a moment, ignoring her pointed look. It was Hal who ended up speaking first. “He means, he made me drive him over to that club after he changed his clothes. So it looks like both of them showed up on Henry’s doorstep tonight.” Fuck. Anger flashed through Jesse, though he wasn’t sure who it was directed toward. Hal and Gideon for not informing anybody that they already went to Sangre, or his Gideon for not taking the time to make sure he wasn’t going to make the situation worse. “And I guess Henry didn’t let on that he already saw you?” Jesse asked Gideon, each word measured. There was no mistaking the guilty glance sideways. “No. Though it explains a whole hell of a lot now.” “Does it explain why you thought it was such a great idea to be his fuck buddy for the night?” the other Gideon growled. Only Mary barring the way kept Gideon from attacking. “I couldn’t very well let on that I wasn’t anything but his old pal, now could I?” he snapped. “And if it wasn’t for me, he would 269

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have drained her dry. I talked him into saving the girl for another day.” The other Gideon rolled his eyes. “Yes, save the girl and fuck yourself. That makes perfect sense.” Jesse’s lips thinned. He wanted to find out what happened, but he didn’t want Gideon to tell him in front of everybody. He waited until Gideon finally looked up and met his gaze before nodding at the closed bedroom door. He didn’t stop to make sure Gideon was following him as he crossed to the bedroom. “You know…” Gideon kicked the door shut behind them. “Sometimes I wonder how the hell you put up with me. Am I always that insufferable?” “Yes. That’s pretty much what I live with everyday. So…what exactly happened?” Some of the guilt returned to the slope of Gideon’s shoulders as he stuffed his hands into his pockets. “I showed up at Sangre, went and saw Henry to see if I could figure out for sure if it’s him. And…he was friendly. Too friendly.” He shrugged. “He wanted to share one of his new toys, and I couldn’t turn him down without looking suspicious, I thought.” Jesse wasn’t surprised by the explanation. After the initial shock had worn off, he realized he didn’t care very much either. “Well, if he already saw the other Gideon tonight, I doubt you averted his suspicions. Plus, your hair is different.” “It would have worked if that one had stayed in bed like he was supposed to. The fact that he didn’t bring it up at all just 270

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confirms that he’s hiding something else. It has to be him who’s been behind all this.” “I think that’s probably true, but why? What does he hope to gain from all this?” “It has to be power. He’s trying to get rid of people he thinks of as a threat. And considering the fence I walked when I was with Mary…” Gideon glanced back at the closed door. “Yeah, I can see him thinking of me as a real threat.” “Is that girl going to be okay?” “What…? Oh. Yeah. She’ll live to breathe another day.” “Good. I guess we better go figure out exactly what we’re going to do about Henry. I wonder if it’ll be as easy to kill him as last time.” Jesse moved toward the door, but paused. “And I don’t think you’re as insufferable as he…the other Gideon…is.” Gideon reached out and cupped the back of Jesse’s neck, pulling him close so that their brows touched. “The sooner we get out of here, the better,” he murmured. “I don’t think I bring out the best in myself.” Jesse couldn’t help but smile a little. “No, you really don’t. If I had the time, I’d try to figure out why, exactly, that is.” His kiss was brief, his eyes dark when he pulled back. “I’m not nearly interesting enough to waste that much time on.” He jerked his head toward the door. “Let’s get this mess sorted out.” “Right.” Everybody was more or less where they left them when Jesse emerged from the bedroom, and Gideon was still glowering. “We still think Henry is the guilty party.” He 271

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addressed the glaring vampire. “Do you still disagree?” “I did.” Mary’s elbow in his side made him grunt. “Maybe not anymore.” “I doubt he’s going to let you…either one of you…back into his office at this point. Which means if we want a chance at him, we’ve probably got to figure out a way to lure him out,” Jesse pointed out. “I think we can do that.” His Gideon looked to the other one. “He knows something is up, and we’re what he wants. There’s no way he’ll be able to resist if we set ourselves up.” “Gideon’s not healed well enough for a fight,” Hal interjected. “He was healed enough to sneak over to this club tonight,” Mary countered. Even Jesse quailed at the look she gave her vampire. “Which we’re going to talk about, by the way.” “How strong is Henry?” Jesse asked. “Would you both need to fight him?” The “Hardly,” and “Are you kidding me?” came at the same time, raising more than one set of brows. The two Gideons glanced at each other, but it was his that answered. “I’ll take care of Henry. That’s the safest choice.” Jesse hoped Gideon was giving him a realistic assessment of Henry’s strength, and not just posturing. “What I’m thinking is that you”—he looked to the other Gideon—“can be bait. And you”—he turned back to his vampire—“can take him out when he’s not looking. It’s simple, but elegant.” “Simple works.” Any protestation the other Gideon might have offered was stifled by Mary’s agreement with Jesse. 272

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“Can you two last another day in this dimension for us to do this tomorrow night?” “I think so. Nothing weird has happened recently. Gideon?” The back-up he expected was slow in coming. If anything, Gideon looked even more wary than he had in addressing the issue of what he’d done with Henry. “I wouldn’t call it…weird.” Gideon squirmed under everyone’s scrutiny. “It’s just…things seem very…sharp. Vivid.” He shrugged. “Except when it’s not.” Jesse waited for some sort of further explanation, but none was forthcoming. “Gideon…I have no idea what that means.” “It means…” Gideon ran his hands over his hair in frustration. “Sometimes it feels like I’m going to fly apart. Like if you touch me, I’ll shatter. And I feel things more.” He waved distractedly at Hal. “I can even feel the ticking of Hal’s watch, for fuck’s sake. Everything’s more…real.” Jesse’s eyes widened at the description. “Am I the only one who thinks having these two in the same room right now might be asking for trouble?” “You’re only now coming to this conclusion?” Mary commented wryly. Gideon looked at Jesse. “You’re not feeling like that?” “I don’t know. I mean…I don’t have the sharp senses you do anyway. I was feeling everything really intensely when…well, earlier. But I thought that was just because…it’s been awhile.” The other Gideon snickered. “Or because we know how to 273

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make it worthwhile.” “We could go out again,” his Gideon suggested. “Just a walk maybe. See how it feels to you.” Mary shook her head. “I don’t like that idea.” Jesse was just relieved that Gideon suggested a walk and nothing more strenuous. “What’s wrong with that idea?” “Henry’s on the alert now. He knows you’re staying here. He probably had Gideon followed again tonight.” “I wasn’t foll—” Mary held up her hand. “I think you should find another place to spend the night, actually. It’s the only way to keep you safe from Henry until tomorrow night.” Jesse nodded. “You’re right. I’m not sure why I didn’t think of that.” But he suspected it might have had something to do with the blood loss. Or the fact that being around both vampires was still distracting. “You can stay at my place,” Hal volunteered. “Henry might be looking for Gideon’s other apartments, but even if he figures out where you are, he won’t be able to get in.” “That works for me,” Gideon said. He looked to Jesse. “You?” “I guess. But where will you stay?” “Oh, don’t worry about me. I’m sure I can find a warm bed.” Mary snorted. “Yeah, Dorothy’s.” Hal turned a surprising color of pink. “Well, her couch at least.” “Good. It’ll only take us a few seconds to get our stuff.” 274

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Jesse paused, before suggesting, “Maybe we should go there together. Safety in numbers, and all that.” “Definitely.” Mary slipped her hand into her Gideon’s and pulled him toward the door. “We’ll wait outside and keep an eye out while you guys get your things together. Come on, Hal.” “I’ll take you guys in my car,” Hal said to them as he passed. “Gideon can go with Mary and follow along. No fires that way.” Jesse nodded. “Sounds good.” He released a slow breath once Mary herded her guys through the door and shut it behind them. “I had no idea you were going through anything like that. Did it start after we decided to stay?” Gideon nodded and headed for the bedroom. “I didn’t notice it so much until I went out tonight, though.” He shot a glance back at Jesse from the doorway. “When you’re around, I have a tendency to focus on you.” Jesse followed him. “I know how that goes. But maybe it’s not such a bad thing. Nobody has a chance against you if you could hear them coming from a mile away.” “I kind of like those odds.” Going to the closet, Gideon began pulling clothes out and tossing them onto the end of the bed, leaving them there for Jesse to stuff into a bag. When he crouched down to pull out the box of weapons, however, Jess heard him curse just before the room went deadly still. “Jess.” Gideon wasn’t moving. “Come here.” Gideon’s tone was enough to make Jesse’s blood cold. He 275

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didn’t hesitate or question his directive. He wasn’t sure what he expected when he peered over Gideon’s shoulder, but it wasn’t the melted and warped axe at Gideon’s feet. “Did this…did you do that?” “I just touched it.” Even now, Gideon’s hands hovered over the deformed weapon, but the new wariness of his shoulders kept him from handling it again. “You don’t think this was one of the side effects Michelle warned us about, do you?” “Yeah, I think it is. This hasn’t happened before?” “No.” He eased to the side. “You touch it. See what happens.” Jesse didn’t want to touch it. But he bent anyway, and ran his fingers over the warped metal. Nothing happened. He increased the contact, then wrapped his fingers around the handle and lifted it without trouble. “Maybe the dimension is just acting against you. I haven’t even been born yet, after all.” Carefully, Gideon reached inside the box and picked up a stake they had made their first day there. Jesse held his breath, waiting for something to happen, but the wood remained solid and straight in Gideon’s grasp, even when Gideon applied pressure. “It looks like it might just be with common articles.” Gideon nodded toward the axe. “That was one of my favorites, so the other me used it a lot. I guess I should be grateful it didn’t go up in flames when I picked it up.” “Maybe it’s best we’re getting out of the apartment now. I 276

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doubt you’d be at risk of destroying anything at Hal’s.” His mouth grim, Gideon straightened and looked around the room. “Would you mind packing? I don’t want to burn the building down because I accidentally grabbed the wrong pair of pants.” Jesse put a comforting hand on Gideon’s shoulder, though his own stomach was rolling. He had expected the situation to get worse, but he hadn’t expected the speed. Fires last night, warping metal now. What was next? How much danger was Gideon actually in? “I’ll take care of everything. There’s not a lot here, anyway. Maybe you should just stand in the middle of the room and not touch anything.” He packed in silence for several minutes, all the while watching Gideon out of the corner of his eye. Gideon never moved. Never blinked. He seemed lost in a world of his own creation, though the dark line of his brows was all Jesse needed to know how upset this was making him. He didn’t speak at all until Jesse had thrown the bag over his shoulder, ready to go out and meet the others on the street. “Don’t tell them.” His words were even, but there was no denying the bleak plea in Gideon’s eyes. “I don’t want to distract them from what’s going on, and I know Mary will worry. I’ll just be extra careful about what I do, what I touch.” Jesse wanted to argue that it might not be prudent to keep secrets from their allies. Instead, he silently resolved to tell everybody what had happened if it became necessary. “Be extra careful, Gideon. After all, we don’t know if it’s 277

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just inanimate objects you should avoid touching.” Gideon shoved his hands into his pockets and nodded. Jesse wanted to assure him that everything would be okay, but they both knew the words would be hollow. Nothing would be okay. Not until Henry was dead and they were back home where they belonged.

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CHAPTER 21 Gideon didn’t think he could ever grow tired of watching Jesse like this. He moved around Hal’s tiny apartment without an ounce of tension, even though he was on his way over to the church. There was even a hint of a smile curving his mouth, though Gideon owned the credit for that. Being pinned to a shower wall would always guarantee that particular reaction. “Are you sure you want to do this?” he asked for the umpteenth time. “You’ve already come a long way. Nobody’s going to fault you if you stay here until tonight.” “I’m not sure if I want to do this, but I think I should. If only to make sure he’s okay. Mary told me he was pretty 279

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shook up after he talked to you.” Gideon refused to feel guilty about that encounter. Even though Mary had read him the riot act about it. “Just be back in time to arm up for tonight. I’m going to need you to watch my back.” “I’ll be back in time.” Jess tucked his shirt in before adding, “You know I wouldn’t miss it. But you’re not going to snap a whip at me this time, are you?” He smiled. “Only if you ask.” “If we get back home in one piece, I just might. What are you going to do while I’m gone?” “Sleep. Eat. Think about what I’m going to do to you and Emma once we get home.” He grabbed Jesse’s wrist and pulled him close. “Just tell me this was worth it. That’s all I need to hear.” Jesse kissed the corner of his mouth. “It was worth it. I wish I could…well, I’m not sure I can tell you. But it’s been worth it. Now, I better get going before I get the urge to show you.” Gideon had the urge, too, but if Jesse was determined to do this, he wasn’t going to hold him back. Releasing him, he stepped back out of touching distance, watching as Jess finished gathering his things. A knock came at the door. “You know, I remember Hal being more patient than this,” Gideon joked as he went to answer it. But it wasn’t Hal. Mary smiled at him brightly as he opened the door, and pushed her way into the apartment without waiting for an invitation. “How are you two doing 280

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over here?” “Good. I was actually just on my way out,” Jesse said. “Where are you going?” “Talk to Marcus. I think it’s about time.” Jess bent and pecked Mary’s cheek in a move that was so casual, Gideon almost didn’t register it. Then he was out the door and throwing over his shoulder, “I’ll be back before dark.” He didn’t want to be left alone with Mary. If there was any one person most connected to the Gideon of this dimension, it was she, and the thought that he might inadvertently hurt her had Gideon keeping a wide berth. “What can I do for you?” he said, heading for the kitchen. “Want some coffee?” “Please. Apparently it’s a good day for talking. I thought we could talk a bit before you guys go after Henry.” Gideon hid his face as he opened the cupboard to get a cup for Mary. Somehow, he had a feeling she didn’t want to talk strategy. He almost wished he was on his way to the church with Jesse. Dealing with Brooker had to be infinitely easier than talking one on one with Mary. *

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Jesse paused outside the church door, waiting for his pulse to increase, waiting for his hands to get clammy. But he felt normal. A little hesitant. Marcus, this Marcus, was innocent. And he was probably a little scared to be faced with the evidence of the darkness inside of him. Jesse was sorry about that—but maybe it was good. Maybe Marcus needed to be 281

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aware of it, in order to fight against it. He pushed the church door open for what he hoped was the last time. He ached for home. Was this pain all in his head? Did it have something to do with the dimension trying to push them out? Jesse didn’t know. He only knew that he felt capable of ripping through the dimensional walls himself. “Marcus?” Jesse shut the door behind him. “Are you here?” His steps echoed as he moved down the center aisle, but he wasn’t alone for long. Marcus appeared in the door at the side of the altar, a hesitant smile creasing his features. “Hello.” He came down to meet Jess, glancing repeatedly over Jesse’s shoulder. “I…is Gideon with you?” “Too much sunlight for Gideon’s tastes. Are you busy?” “No, no, just preparing some notes for Sunday.” Marcus gestured toward the office he’d just left. “Would you like to come back for some coffee?” Jesse wasn’t really thirsty, but he nodded. “I wasn’t interrupting anything, was I? I’m afraid I don’t know what pastors do during the week.” Marcus led the way; it was easier to follow without having to meet those odd amber eyes. “Not interrupting, no. My life isn’t nearly as interesting as yours and Gideon’s. Mine is all paperwork, paperwork, praying, more paperwork.” Jesse chuckled. “Actually, that sounds pretty much exactly like my life. Except, I probably do a little less praying and a little more paperwork.” He settled in a chair near the small desk, watching as Marcus poured two cups of coffee. Deciding 282

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to forego the small talk, he added, “Gideon told me about…what he told you.” Marcus nearly dropped the cup he was holding. Coffee splashed over the rim, and he immediately turned away from Jesse to pull a handkerchief out of his pocket and start mopping up the spill. “Oh?” His voice was too high. “I didn’t…he didn’t…” Shaking his head, he dropped the sodden handkerchief to the tray holding the coffee and sank onto the corner of the desk. “I don’t even know what to say to you. I can’t imagine ever being driven to those kind of lengths.” “Well…you are.” Jesse knew it sounded cold, but there was no point in trying to gloss over the truth. “But I didn’t come here for an apology or anything. I know you aren’t responsible.” Marcus frowned. “So…why are you here?” “Because the man who did this wore your face. He had your voice. And your eyes. And I’m not close enough to tell, but I bet he had your smell, too. And I needed to see if it’s a face and a voice that will haunt me for the rest of my life.” “And will they?” Marcus immediately shook his head. “No, don’t tell me. I’m not sure I want to hear the answer.” Jesse looked down at his hands, not sure if he had an answer to give. *

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Gideon perched on the edge of the couch, watching Mary toy with her cup. He was trying to maintain as much distance 283

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between them as he possibly could, but so far, all he’d managed was this uncomfortable silence. They’d tried small talk in the kitchen as he’d poured her coffee, but as soon as he’d retreated to the living room again, desperate for space, the awkwardness had returned. “So if all goes well tonight, we should be out of your hair for good tomorrow,” he said, trying to sound normal. “Oh. Did you two figure out a way back?” “Well, no, not exactly. But it shouldn’t be too hard to do. Jesse’s good at that sort of thing.” “I’m sure he’ll figure it out. And if he can’t, I’ll march down to Michelle’s store and make her help. You know…I’m glad you found him.” She smiled. “Or he found you, as the case may be. He makes you happy. You deserve that, you know.” Gideon looked down at where his hands were knotted together. Her smile still managed to cut through him, each and every time. “I think that’s a matter of opinion. But for what it’s worth, I don’t have any intentions of losing him. Not like I did you.” “I don’t like to think of you…suffering for so long. You know I’d never want that for you.” A place deep inside acknowledged the truth in Mary’s words. But it was next to impossible to say so aloud. “Things happen,” he said instead, rising from where he sat. He couldn’t sit still any longer and paced around the edge of the room. “They happen for a reason. I’ve done a lot of good for Chicago. Things you would’ve approved of.” 284

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“I heard. Jesse told me I’d be proud of the work you’ve done. And given the unmistakable look of pride in his eyes when he said it, I believe him.” “Well, take what Jess says with a grain of salt. When it comes to me, he’s never been exactly objective.” The corner of Mary’s mouth lifted. “Well, you’re definitely his favorite topic of conversation. But even if he’s less than objective, I still believe him.” In spite of the knots still winding through him, Gideon smiled. “You always did,” he said softly. “You changed my whole life.” “I know. Do you know you changed my whole life, too?” He ground to a halt. There was enough distance between them for him to feel safe doing so. “We were pretty good together.” “Yes, we are.” She shrugged. “Sorry, I can’t talk about us in the past tense. But I do believe things happen for a reason. God has a plan for everybody. Maybe in your dimension everything that happened needed to happen.” Gideon shook his head. “There is no way your death had to be like that.” “I don’t want the details. And thanks to you, I won’t have to know the details. But…if it had been different somehow…less violent or less sudden…do you think you would have committed your existence to the greater good?” He already knew the answer to that. No. He hadn’t committed when she’d been alive. But if he told her that, she’d question him, and if there was one thing he couldn’t do to 285

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Mary now, it was lie to her. Maybe the person he should be talking to was his other self. “I don’t know. Maybe.” Mary didn’t look convinced by his less-than-enthusiastic answer. “Jesse said you’re never going to get over what happened. Do you think that’s true?” “Yes.” This one he could answer, unequivocally. “You know better than I do, you don’t get over tragedy. You just learn how to turn it around into something better.” “Yeah,” Mary said softly. “Yeah, that’s the best thing you can do. I just want to make sure you’re happy.” “That’s funny,” he replied, matching her tone. “Because that’s all I ever wanted for you.” “I am happy.” Mary stood and approached him. “Being with you has always made me happy, even when you’re at your most maddening and stubborn.” Holding up his hands, Gideon backed away. “Don’t. As much as I want…my presence here isn’t stable. There’s no telling what might happen.” Mary stopped short, smiling sheepishly. “Habit, I guess. I forgot about the potential of bursting into flames. My point still stands, though.” “Point taken, then. Just do me a favor, okay? Don’t let me get away with any shit.” “Don’t worry. Nobody knows how to snap the whip like me. I’ll keep you in line.” 286

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*

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The seconds stretched between them, and Jesse wished he had taken the time to prepare some sort of speech. He didn’t want to waste Marcus’s time, or his own. Marcus, for his part, was watching him patiently. “I want to know if coming here has made a difference. We saved Mary and Gideon. But…what about you?” Marcus smiled. “Saving people is supposed to be my line of work.” “And I generally don’t worry about people’s souls. But I don’t want yours to be lost.” For long seconds, Marcus toyed with the handle of his cup, his eyes growing more somber with each passing moment. “Before Gideon spoke with me, I would never have considered my soul in jeopardy,” he said quietly. “All I’ve done since then is think about it. Think about what I would do, where my faith truly lies. And I’m ashamed to admit that perhaps there is truth to the possibility. That I let Mary and…my feelings for her cloud my judgment.” “I know you love her. I can’t say I wouldn’t…lose my mind a bit if anything happened to Gideon.” Or Emma. “But Mary isn’t going to live forever.” The smile that returned to Marcus’s mouth was more than a little sad. “It’s hard to imagine a world without her in it. She’s very much…larger than life. Much like Gideon.” Jesse nodded. “Yes, she is. Now that I’ve met her…well, I understand. But the world without her in it kept turning. Gideon began fighting for good. Hal became a police officer, 287

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married, and had a boy who grew up to be a good man. A lot of the changes you’re fighting for now…they happen. The world is still a good place without her.” “I still don’t want an answer to my earlier question, but will you promise me one thing?” He leaned forward, his gaze earnest. “Don’t let yourself forget that, either. In spite of what happened.” Jesse’s chest tightened just a second before something warm and sweet filled him. Emma. But of course, it wasn’t Emma. Marcus was looking at him expectantly, waiting for an answer. Jesse took a deep breath, trying to clear his head. “I won’t. Do you…do you feel anything strange?” Immediately, concern replaced the light in Marcus’s eyes. “No. Are you? Is this an effect of being here when you’re not supposed to?” Jesse rubbed his forehead. Whatever it was, the feeling wasn’t fading. If anything, it seemed to be growing more intense. His stomach began to knot. “No. No, I don’t think it’s that. It might just be…I could just be homesick. I mean, I was just telling you how great home is.” “You should go, then. Is Hal waiting for you?” He wasn’t, but Jesse didn’t want Marcus to think he had to drive him back to the apartment. “Yeah.” He stood, wondering if he should say something else—maybe ask him one more time not to damn himself. “Thanks for the coffee. Go home before dark. You don’t want to get stuck somewhere while Henry is out.” 288

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Marcus nodded, but didn’t rise from his seat. “Good luck tonight. God be with you.” “Thanks.” Jess studied the other man for another second. He wanted to be sure to remember Marcus Brooker like this— a faithful man who had a chance to avoid the worst. And Jesse believed Marcus wouldn’t throw that chance away. He ducked out of the rectory and the air seemed thicker in the chapel. Much thicker. Like he was walking underwater. The hair on the back of his neck and arms stood on end, and for the first time, fear stirred to life in his gut. Maybe the dimension was pushing against him. Halfway down the center aisle, the world dipped around him. Jesse’s hand shot out and grabbed the back of a pew, steadying himself against the wave of vertigo that threatened to topple him over. He squeezed his eyes shut. Took a deep breath. Maybe this was some of what Gideon had experienced. No wonder he’d wanted to keep it away from the others. Though the immediate sense of shaking passed, the oppressiveness took longer to recede. His head was just starting to clear when something soft touched his cheek. “I knew there was a good reason why you missed the deadline.” The voice was Emma’s. When he opened his eyes, he saw that the warmth flowing through him, replacing the fear, came from her as well. Jesse couldn’t even talk. He wanted to tell her he missed her, how happy he was to see her. He wanted to ask her how she got there. He wanted to tell her about Henry, where 289

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Gideon was, and everything that had happened since they last saw her. Instead, he cupped the back of her head and pressed his mouth to hers. He couldn’t move his mouth from hers. He didn’t want to lose the contact. “Please tell me you’re here to bring us home,” Jesse said against her lips. “Come hell or high water,” she affirmed. Her plush body pressed to his, but it was her luminous eyes lifting to search his that Jess took the most comfort in. “So there is an us? Gideon’s all right, too?” Jesse kissed her brow, the skin under her eye, the corner of her mouth. “There is an us. Gideon is fine.” His mouth went to her jaw. “He’s at Hal’s apartment.” He brushed his lips against her neck. “But we’re not quite ready to go home.” He finally lifted his head. “I want to go home, desperately. But we’re still not quite done here.” Jesse sat on the nearest pew and pulled her into his lap. His arms went around her. “Let me see if I can get you caught up on everything.” She listened patiently while he recounted the events of the past week, though her gaze kept drifting to the scratches along his jaw and neck. Beneath the relief and sweet warmth emanating from her, there was a thread of worry, thickening with each detail he shared. “If Gideon can’t handle a weapon, though,” she said when he’d stopped, “how is he planning on killing Henry?” “We think he can handle a weapon—just not one of the other Gideon’s weapons. And he has taken Henry before. I don’t think it’ll be a hard fight. How much time did Michelle 290

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give you?” “Only a few hours. Midnight, actually. The walls between the dimensions are really tenuous right now, and I had to twist her arm pretty hard to even give me this much.” “I’m not sorry I missed that battle.” He rested his forehead against her shoulder. “Thanks for fighting it, though. I don’t want to go before Gideon kills Henry.” Her slim hands caressed his nape, a soft gesture he hadn’t even realized he’d missed until she’d done it. “What about you?” She brushed her mouth over his temple. “How are you doing?” “I’m doing good,” Jesse said softly. “Much better. I’ve been through a lot this week. If we weren’t in a church, I’d give you more of the details. Marcus is here…in the rectory. We were just talking and…I felt normal.” Her head swiveled to look over her shoulder, as if she expected Marcus to be standing behind them, but just as quickly, she turned back to Jesse. Her pleased kisses rained along his jaw, finding the corner of his mouth, as her arms tightened around his shoulders. “Thank God,” she breathed. “I just want you to be happy again, Jess. I was so worried…” But the rest of it was lost in a fresh shower of kisses, her lips as honeyed as he remembered. “I know…” Her lips skimmed across his before he could finish the thought, and he moaned into the kiss. Her tongue slid around his, pushing deeper to explore his mouth. He didn’t understand how she could taste so good. And it felt like a thousand years since they’d last touched. 291

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Emma squirmed on his lap, getting more comfortable against his burgeoning erection. The heat of her thighs seeped through her jeans, and the swell of her emotions soaked into him like a forgotten embrace. He could hold her like that all day. He would have, if she hadn’t parted to gasp for air. “So how much time do we have before sunset?” she panted. “Enough to go find Gideon and show both of you exactly how much I missed you?” “I really want to say yes. But I’m not sure we’d be able to stop at sunset. Or midnight, for that matter.” She squirmed again and he moaned. “Let’s go find Gideon. He should be right where I left him.” She slid off, though her hand quickly sought his to lace their fingers together. “We’ll consider it an appetizer. No way Gideon will argue with that.” As she pulled him out of the pew and toward the exit, however, dark shadows filled the doorway, slamming the doors behind them. “Gideon’s not the only one who’d consider you appetizers,” Henry drawled. “I think this time, though, he’s going to have to settle for leftovers.”

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CHAPTER 22 Fear instantly washed through Jesse—not all of it his. He squeezed Emma’s hand, hoping it would reassure her. His eyes darted around the small space. Four vampires, total. Had they been hiding? He had a stake on him, but he doubted Emma was armed. And what about Marcus? Gideon had told him that Marcus had been nearly worthless in a fight. “I think he’s going to rip you apart limb by limb,” Jesse countered, his voice even. Henry took a bold step forward. “Really? Is he here?” He looked deliberately throughout the empty church before settling his hungry gaze back on Emma. “All I see is your little girlfriend. Now if Gideon had brought the both of you to 293

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Sangre the other night, there is no way I wouldn’t have come down to have a taste.” Jesse’s hand tightened around Emma’s, and he wished he had a crossbow. Or a gun. Anything he could use on Henry at a distance. Barring that, he wanted to punch a hole through Henry’s face. Emma gasped behind him, and he thought she must have felt his sudden spark of rage. “Touch her, and it’ll be the last thing you do.” Henry chuckled. “Cute. You act like you actually have a say in the matter. Nice to know Gideon hasn’t beaten all the fight out of you yet.” Jesse thought about how easy it was for Brooker’s goons to get the drop on him, to corner him and knock him out and drag him away to a dark room with chains hanging from the ceiling. Nobody was ever going to do that to him again. Henry’s eyes flashed dangerously, and his fangs looked sharp and hungry. But Gideon wasn’t going to come and rescue them. Not unless Marcus could contact him. They must have known Marcus was in the rectory, but maybe he could distract the four vampires long enough to give Marcus a chance to escape. “Is that what this is all about? Getting to Gideon?” “That’s all any of this has been about,” Henry snarled. “Chicago would belong to me by now if he didn’t keep fucking things up. I don’t care what magic he’s done to make himself a double, but I’m going to kill both of them before the night’s over. And you’re going to be my fucking bait.” 294

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“I suppose that’ll work. Gideon will be here as soon as the sun sets, if I don’t go home. Of course, he’s a vampire, so he’s likely to just burn the church down with you inside it.” “And lose one of his favorite toys? I don’t think so.” Henry’s eyes narrowed. Clearly, he hadn’t considered the possibility of not hurting them first, but then again, intelligence had never been his strong suit. “So I just make sure we don’t spill any blood first,” he said. “Doesn’t mean we can’t still have some fun while we wait for him.” His golden eyes fixed on Emma, who shrank behind Jesse’s back. “Let’s start with the girl.” Jesse frowned. “What part of ‘touch her and I’ll kill you,’ didn’t you understand?” “And which part of ‘You don’t have a fucking choice’ don’t you get?” He saw them move, but two of the three vampires flanking Henry moved at the same time, in opposite directions, coming at them from each side. Even if he’d been armed, he couldn’t have killed them both, though he did manage to drive his fist into the nose of the one closest to Emma. The cartilage crunched, and blood spurted over his fingers, but the other vampire was too strong and too swift not to wrest Emma from Jesse’s grasp anyway. “Bring her here,” Henry ordered. Jesse knew if he was going to beat the vampires, he couldn’t be stupid. What he lacked in strength, he had to make up for with intelligence. Which meant, as much as he wanted to, he couldn’t charge Henry and shove the stake down his 295

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throat. Instead of rushing forward, he tried to focus and broadcast positive emotions. Don’t panic. Don’t panic. I won’t let anything happen to you. Emma cast one last glance at Jesse just before Henry wrapped his meaty hand around her arm. He knew it was meant to be a moment of connection, like any other they had shared; she’d had her walls down ever since arriving. He took the relief it offered for the brief second before he realized what else it meant. Henry would feel it, too. The vampire hissed at the moment of contact. His nostrils flared, and the rage and lust that had already been coursing through him leapt through Emma to Jesse, white-hot for the brief second before Emma slammed her walls back up. He jerked her hard against his body, leaning down to sniff her hair. “An empath…” The eyes he leveled at Jesse glittered. “I think I need to thank you.” The vampire Jesse had hit was staring at him with hard eyes. Jess knew they were just waiting for the word from Henry, then they would descend on him like wild dogs. “For what?” Emma gasped as Henry roughly pinched her breast. “For sharing such a fucking delicious treat. I’ve never had an empath before.” In that moment, he wished he had Gideon’s strength. Not because he didn’t think he could kill Henry—he knew he could, and he would. But if he had Gideon’s strength, he could 296

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make Henry’s suffering last. “And you’re not going to have one now.” *

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He wasn’t sure it was ever going to be simple just sitting with Mary, but she did everything she could to try and put him at ease. She told stories of people he’d long forgotten, told stories about him. She joked about his habits, teased him about his desires. She made minutes pass without his constant glances at the clock, so that when the phone rang, Gideon was surprised to see Jesse had been gone for well over two hours. “I’ll get that,” she said when he looked at the phone with a frown. He nodded, picking up her empty coffee cup and carrying it into the kitchen. He had only just turned on the water to rinse it out when he felt the spike in Mary’s pulse. When she called him, he went without hesitation. She didn’t speak, simply held out the phone to him. “Hello?” “I…I don’t know how,” Marcus said in a rushed whisper. “But they’re here. Henry.” Gideon froze. “What? Where? At the church?” “Yes. They’re in the chapel. They have Jesse…and a girl, I think.” “What girl?” Fuck. “How the hell did they get there? It’s still daylight.” “I don’t know. I’ve never seen her before. And I didn’t really get a good look at her. I think they were hiding 297

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downstairs.” Gideon’s mind raced. Henry had known. They had known Henry was alerted; they should have anticipated a move like this. Because now he had Jesse. And an innocent girl was likely going to get sacrificed. “Hide,” Gideon ordered. “I’m going to be there as soon as I can. Don’t let them—” The rest of it choked as he heard snarls in the background and Marcus’s terrified shout. In the next moment, the line went dead. “We have to get to the church. Now.” Mary already had a blanket in one hand and her car keys in the other. “You worry about not bursting into flames, and I’ll worry about driving.” *

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When they dragged Marcus out of the rectory, Jesse could only curse under his breath. Why didn’t he run? Why didn’t he get his ass outside in the sunshine? He only needed to get a few feet away from the church to be safe. Was it too much to hope for that he contacted Gideon? The vampire shoved Marcus forward, and he barely caught himself before landing on the floor. His eyes were wide and frightened. Would he be able to defend himself? Was he smart enough to carry a stake? Jesse hoped so. “Are you okay?” Jesse asked under his breath. Marcus merely nodded. Henry still had Emma in his arms, his broad hands pushed 298

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beneath her blouse. Her wide eyes were fixed on Jesse, though, and he knew she was doing everything in her power to contain her fear. Being with Gideon was one thing, but she had suffered a lot of torment at the hands of vampires. This was the closest she had come to reliving those moments since he’d promised her she’d never have to suffer like that again. He cringed every time Henry’s fangs got near her unmarked neck. “I can’t believe nobody’s ever gotten a taste of you,” he growled. Emma lifted her chin. “It doesn’t matter if you do or not. You’ll still only be second best to Gideon.” Jesse couldn’t help but smile at her defiant tone. “That’s his problem, and he knows it. Don’t you, Henry? I would say it’s an inferiority complex, but you actually are inferior.” Jesse licked his lips and looked pointedly at Henry’s erection. “Take it from somebody who has firsthand experience.” Henry’s eyes narrowed, and for the first time since touching Emma, he focused on Jesse. “I’d remember fucking a mouth like yours.” “Oh, you would.” Jesse took a small step forward, making sure Henry’s attention moved with him. “You want to know the magic Gideon used? Simple dimensional magic. And in our dimension…I think I forgot about you long before you stopped thinking about me.” “That’s impossible.” But Henry looked less than sure. “Gideon doesn’t know shit about dimensional magic.” “Well, Gideon’s not necessarily the brains of the 299

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operation.” “You can’t think he’d actually listen to you. You’re just a fuck toy to him. I can smell the blood and come all over you.” Jesse frowned with mock hurt. “I’m not just a fuck toy to him. I’m his favorite fuck toy. Besides, if he didn’t listen to me, we wouldn’t be standing here having this conversation.” “Favorite, huh?” He leered, but at least his focus was away from Emma. “Gideon never did know how to play with his toys. If you were mine, you wouldn’t even be able to walk right now.” “I think I’m the one currently in the best position to judge that. And quite frankly, I’m not convinced.” With a snarl, Henry shoved Emma into the arms of the vampire at his side. She cried out from the force, and Jesse had to bite the inside of his cheek to keep from responding to the way the other vamp’s fingers dug into her soft flesh. “You’ve got a big mouth. Like that Mary. Gideon doesn’t know how to shut her up, either.” “Gideon knows exactly how to shut me up.” The only thing that felt real to Jesse was the sharp stake shoved in his waistband, snug against the small of his back. “Too bad he’s not here yet to show you what to do.” “I don’t need Gideon to show me anything. He’s a fucking joke.” Jesse took a step forward. Then another. Henry’s nostrils flared as Jesse approached, but Jess didn’t push his luck. He didn’t want to get too close too fast and make Henry suspicious, or destroy the one small window he had to act. 300

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Instead, he reached for his collar and yanked it open to expose the marks on his throat. “Does it look like he’s joking? But you know, this dimension isn’t exactly like ours. Maybe here you don’t have a pencil-dick.” Henry reacted as he anticipated, his hands going to his fly. “You talk too much. On your knees, fucker, or I’ll snap your legs like twigs.” He heard Emma’s sharp intake of breath, but as Jesse began to comply, his eyes never leaving Henry’s, the vampire holding Emma suddenly shouted in pain. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw her hand tight on the vampire’s balls, knuckles white from how tightly she was squeezing. The vamp shoved her away to break the grip, but she twisted at the last minute, pulling a stake out of nowhere, and shoved it into her captor’s chest. The sudden explosion of dust covered Henry’s leering face and filled his eyes. He closed them with a sharp growl and snapped his head away. Jesse had the stake in hand and against Henry’s chest before the rest of the dust settled to the floor. Henry’s hand shot out, grabbing Jess by the throat, but he wasn’t fast enough. Jesse slammed the stake through Henry’s thick chest, finding his heart unerringly. Henry’s face contorted into a comical look of surprise. And then he was gone. “Jesse! Look out!” Jesse turned his head at Marcus’s shout of warning, but he didn’t even have enough time to put up his arms to defend 301

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himself. A minion fell on him, all fangs and claws, and the sharp scent of his own blood filled his nose. Jesse didn’t even have the chance to shout before the vampire burst into a fresh cloud of dust, exposing Marcus’s wide eyes. There wasn’t time to take Marcus’s shaky hand before the last of Henry’s cronies launched forward. He tackled Marcus to the ground, the minister’s head making a sickening crack where it hit the floor. The stake he held clattered to the floor, but his cry was stifled by fangs sinking into his throat. Emma rushed forward, but Jesse was quicker. He leapt onto the vampire’s back, burying his stake between the demon’s shoulder blades. Almost immediately, he collapsed on top of Marcus as the vampire disintegrated into ash. He rolled off as Emma crouched next to them. “He’s bleeding badly,” she said. Carefully, she slid her fingers beneath the back of his skull and came back scarlet. “We have to get him to a hospital.” “There’s one nearby. I think he’s got a car parked in back.” Jesse stood slowly and took Emma’s hand, pulling her to her feet before she could protest. “Are you okay?” The smile she offered him was small, but genuine. “Getting felt up by a horny vampire is infinitely easier to deal with than worrying whether or not you and Gideon were even alive. I’ll be just fine.” Jesse studied her for another moment before nodding. “Okay. Good.” Blood still flowed from the back of Marcus’s head. Jesse looked around for anything to staunch the flow, but there was 302

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nothing. Moving quickly, he took off his own shirt and bent to gently place it beneath his skull. “Go in the rectory and see if you can find Hal’s number anywhere. We need to call Gideon and Mary. I’ll get Marcus out to the car.” She raced off, leaving Jesse to carefully lift Marcus into his arms. It had never occurred to him just how slight the other man really was. In his mind, Marcus was always larger than life, even after meeting him here. But now, with his dark skin turning ashen from blood loss, it was hard to remember the monster who had tormented him so. This man had saved his life. This man had put his own life on the line for Jesse’s. Jesse would never forget that. He blinked against the daylight, though cloud cover kept it from being too bright. There was only one car parked behind the church, but as he was struggling to get the door open in order to get Marcus into the back seat, a second roared up behind it. Mary jumped out and rushed forward. “Marcus!” The sight of the blood didn’t faze her, though her anxious eyes leapt to Jesse’s. “What happened? Where’s the girl?” “The girl?” Even before he finished the question, Jesse realized Marcus must have called Mary before the vamps found him. He carefully slid Marcus into the backseat, doing what he could to keep his head steady. “She’s in the church. She’s fine. Is Gideon with you?” “Covered up in the back.” She wasn’t paying any attention to her car, too focused on Marcus. “How about we do a trade? 303

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You get Gideon inside, and I’ll get Marcus to the hospital.” “Sounds like a plan. Mary.” Her eyes were still locked on Marcus, and Jesse took her shoulder, forcing her to look at him. “The girl…it’s Emma. She’s going to get us back home.” It took a moment for the words to sink in. Mary blinked. “You’re leaving?” “Yeah. It looks like our time is up. But Henry is gone now and everything should get back to normal.” She glanced back at the other car. “You know, we have a very warped sense of what normal is.” A small smile curved her mouth when she turned back to Jesse. “I’d ask you to take care of Gideon for me, but I already know you will. You’re a good man, Jesse Madding. God couldn’t have sent a better one to look after him.” Jesse swallowed around the lump in his throat. “I’ll do the best I can to keep him out of trouble. For you and God. Take good care of yours, too. He’s…well, he’s still going to need a bit of help.” Her smile softened. “Yeah, but I think after this, he might try just a little bit harder. And isn’t that why we love him?” She moved to give Jess a hug, but checked it at the last minute, nodding instead as she went around to the driver’s side. Jesse stepped away from the curb and watched as she switched on the engine and swiftly drove away. He heard Gideon’s growl of frustration as soon as Marcus’s car was out of sight. He yanked the back door open, positioning himself to cast a shadow on Gideon’s face. “Need some help?” 304

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“Just tell me everything’s okay,” came the muffled response. “All I can smell is Marcus’s blood.” Jesse crouched, so he was even with Gideon’s hidden head. “Everything’s fine. Better than fine.” He leaned forward, putting his mouth close to the blanket. “Emma’s here and we’re going home.”

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CHAPTER 23 They had been back for over twelve hours, but Gideon had yet to sleep. He had tried, using it as a prime excuse to escape Michelle’s death glares, but not even the warm weight of Jesse spooning into him or Emma’s soft snores as she nuzzled against Jesse’s chest were enough to help him drift off. It was just as well. He didn’t think he could ever get enough of watching the two of them together. Jesse’s sleep was the calmest it had been in months. No restlessness, no dreams, not even a hard-on to betray more illicit thoughts. And with Jesse at peace, Emma was even more so. From the beginning, she had been the first and best mirror of his lover’s emotions. If she was good, all was well 306

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with the world. Finally. He hadn’t pressed for details about what had happened with Marcus. At first, Emma had been too wrapped up in getting them home, fearful of screwing up Michelle’s instructions. Then, it seemed too important to actually get back to the apartment, and when he had seen the longing in Jesse’s eyes when he’d spotted the bed, any thoughts of dissecting everything that had occurred immediately vanished. Gideon wasn’t entirely certain he wanted to know everything, though. As long as Jesse was good with it, he didn’t want to force him to dredge up the memories, relive it over and over again as he’d done the torture. It was time to move on. It was time for all of them to move on. Gideon propped his head up on his hand and gazed down at his lovers. The twining of Jesse’s arm around Emma’s waist exposed the tattoo along his arm, the outline of the dragons that still awaited color. He was going to have to call Rae and schedule that appointment. He’d ask that they get done separately this time, however, to save her the wash of sensations of having Emma’s open abilities channeling Jesse’s lust. Then afterward, he could show both of them how grateful he was that they wore marks, branding them as his. His fingertips grazed over Jesse’s arm. The other scratches were already fading. The first thing Emma had done when they’d reached the apartment was slather Jess in some of his healing cream. 307

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Gideon didn’t know how long he watched them before Emma stirred. He remained motionless and silent as her sleep thinned, hoping she would settle again. But she just grew more restless until her eyes opened, and she was blinking sleepily at him over Jesse’s shoulder. “Why aren’t you asleep?” He smiled, but when he spoke, he kept his voice low in order not to disturb Jesse. “Maybe your snoring woke me up.” She frowned, her voice matching his. “I don’t snore.” She glanced down to Jesse’s still form. “I haven’t seen him like this in a long time.” “I know. I think this is the longest he’s slept at a single stretch in months.” She ran her fingertips down Jesse’s arm. “I missed you two so much. You have no idea how lonely I’ve been.” Gideon reached across Jesse’s body in order to brush his knuckles across her flawless cheek. “Sorry about the added worry. And Michelle. When Jesse realized the other me was still in danger…” His voice trailed off. He didn’t need to elaborate. Emma would understand. “I knew you’d only miss the deadline for a good reason. As for Michelle…let’s just say I think I understand why she drives you crazy.” “Then I won’t feel guilty about asking you and Jesse to stay here when I go see her tonight.” When a small line appeared between her brows, Gideon just shook his head. “It’s not like that. I just…none of this would’ve been possible if she hadn’t offered the dimensional magic for us. If nothing else, I 308

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need to thank her for that. And it’ll look more sincere if I don’t have you two tagging along. Otherwise, she’ll think I’m only there because you guys made me go.” “Well, be careful. She’s very annoyed with both of you right now. I almost think we should send Jesse over to charm her first.” “Even more reason for me to go first. She can take it out on me. Jesse doesn’t need her shit.” “Good point. Fortunately, according to her, there was no lasting damage. Plus, she’ll be relieved to know how much better Jess is now. I’m so happy this worked.” Her gaze drifted down to Jesse’s bare chest. The rich waves of warmth emanating from her had fuelled much of Gideon’s contentment over the past few hours, and now, all he wanted was to pull both of them close, never let them be hurt again. That might actually be possible now. “I’m going to ask Jesse to step away from the office work for a while,” he said. “There’s something I need for you and him to do.” “Do you need us to stay in bed for, oh…the next week?” He chuckled. “For some of it. But actually, I told Jess I thought it was time we found a bigger place. And real-estate agents don’t do a lot of midnight viewings.” Emma’s eyes widened and she sat up a little more, like she needed to get a better view of Gideon’s face. “Really? Oh, my God. This is great.” “And here I thought you actually liked our place,” he said with a cock of his brow. 309

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“Oh, don’t get me wrong. It’s very nice. I’ve never seen a nicer basement apartment. But if we get a bigger place, it won’t feel like we’re stepping all over each other. And Jesse can have a library so his books aren’t everywhere.” She paused and frowned slightly. “We’re not letting him decorate it, though, right?” “No. I had to promise him more books to get him to agree, but I figure it’s worth it.” “Or I could find somebody who appreciates my excellent taste,” Jesse muttered without opening his eyes. “The world is not that big.” Bowing his head, Gideon brushed a kiss across Jesse’s temple. “You’re supposed to be sleeping.” “I would be, but somebody’s talking in my ear.” Jesse’s arm tightened around Emma, and he pulled her closer. “Plus, when I felt Emma’s excitement, I wanted to know what I was missing out on.” “Sorry,” Emma murmured. “But finding a bigger place is pretty exciting.” “It means less chance of you torturing me with those fucking awful candles, too,” Gideon said with a grin. “I like your fucking awful candles,” Jesse assured her, his voice still thick with sleep. “They’re not fucking awful. They smell good. I bought some new ones while you were gone. They’re called Peppermint Delight.” “Sounds delightful.” Gideon rolled his eyes. “Mine are better.” But neither of 310

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them were listening to him. Emma’s lashes were dark against her cheeks where she’d closed her eyes again, and Jesse’s breathing had slowed. “Go back to sleep,” he instructed softly. “We’ve got plenty of time to decide later that my taste is better than both of yours.” “Yes, Sir,” Jesse said softly, moving closer to him, somehow fitting even more snugly against Gideon’s body. He pulled Emma with him, until not even an inch of space separated them. Emma’s tone echoed Jesse’s as she added, “Love you.” Gideon brushed the hair away from her cheek, then skimmed his fingertips over the most recent bite mark on Jesse’s neck. A rush of heat enveloped him, enough to make his eyelids droop for a moment. He didn’t rest his head, however. For now, he was going to watch the two most precious things in his life. And revel in the possibilities of their future.

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JAMIE CRAIG

Jamie Craig is the collaborative efforts of Pepper Espinoza and Vivien Dean. Both successful authors on their own, they began working together in early 2006. Pepper lives with her husband and cats in Utah, where she attends graduate school, and Vivien resides in northern California with her husband and two children. *

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Don’t miss Master Of Obsidian by Jamie Craig, Available at Amber-Allure.com!

Jesse Madding has been working for Gideon, a vampire fighting to maintain the balance between good and evil, for two years, and has loved him for nearly that long. When Gideon slams him against an alley wall and demands sex, Jesse is too happy to oblige, but it opens doors in their relationship that Gideon isn’t sure he wants to enter. Especially since he suspects he was under the powerful influence of an unknown substance, and Jesse is his best friend.

As they try to negotiate a new relationship involving Jesse’s willing submission to Gideon’s darker desires—including bondage, pain, and bloodplay—they learn that a new drug is being distributed in the city. Known simply as “obsidian,” this drug unleashes a vampire’s demon, destroying any sense of self-control. Widespread use of obsidian could bring chaos to Chicago and turn the city into a bloodbath, but even as Jesse and Gideon race to contain it, they’re consumed and distracted by their own growing passion and burgeoning emotions…

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